Ariana Grande Says Her Anxiety And Depression Are At An 'All Time High'

From an outsider's perspective, it looks like Ariana Grande's Sweetener tour is pure perfection (just ask Harry Styles), but the woman behind the music is still human. A human who has suffered unimaginable trauma in recent years and heartache many of us could never even fathom. As a result, the European leg of the extensive tour has taken its toll on the singer mentally and in order to preserve her mental health, she decided to cancel a meet-and-greet during a show in Antwerp, Belgium over the weekend.

The pop star broke the news to Arianators via an Instagram story message. "hi my loves time for some honesty," she began the note. "my anxiety and depression have been at an all time high lately. i have been giving you all i've got and trying to push through as hard as i can and mask it. today has been an extra rough one. after a handful of panic attacks, i feel like the wisest decision would be to not do soundcheck party or m&g today and preserve my energy for the show. i don’t want to rush through our time together or seem shaky. i like spending actual time with you and i won’t be able to be present or give you the best of me today."

"anybody that had m&g or soundcheck today will of course be fully reimbursed for this decision. i love you. i’m so sorry," she continued. "i promise i will absolutely give you the best show i can."

According to Cosmopolitan, Ari expanded on her feelings in an email to fans who had purchased tickets to the meet-and-greet. "I wish I could control these attacks but as anyone with anxiety or depression understands," she wrote, "sometimes you can only operate on its terms and not your own."

She also mirrored the sentiment of wanting to be the best she can in an Instagram post shared after the concert. "i’ll give u all i have n nothing less i promise" she captioned a black and white photo of herself from the performance.

This isn't the first time Grande has opened up about how touring affects her mental health. Back in April, she tweeted then deleted a message where she referred to touring as "hell."

"Making [music] is healing. Performing it is like reliving it all over again and it is hell," she said.

Photo: Getty Images