Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
Roll down your window, you can turn up the salad.
I don't know what I would do that. In the
morning show. In the morning, can we talk about your
butt for a minute? They are they doing to put
a smile on my face? Like, why are you shooting
my foot? This is not part of the I don't
even know your foot could grow hair there sometime when
you laugh a little, you Pete. I just love the
show and everything about it. In the morning show. Hey,
(00:24):
let's pop on in here. What is this Tuesday? Let's
hop in here, hang out with each other, have a
cup of coffee, talk about dinosaurs, let's talk about let's
talk about thrift stores, let's talk about roller coasters. Let's
tell some knock knock jokes. Funday ever it is with me? Yeah,
knock knock No, And yet it's too early. We'll get
(00:46):
to that morning Danielle hid morning. Hello, there's hello, there's
straight y foggy. How you feeling today, Yeah, Producer Sam's here.
Let's see Scotty high, Scottie. Hi, Hi, Diamond, it's here
to one eight hundred and two four two zero one
hundred call us if you want us, all right, you
know what, I'll give it to you. I gave you
some categories on the way end, Danielle. Yeah, we can
(01:08):
talk about thrift shops. We can talk about not jokes,
we can talk about dinosaurs, we can talk about roller coasters.
What song do you want to hear from one of
those categories? I think since we're doing thrift shops, we
should do a little mac limo. Come on, hold on,
how much do you have in your pocket? Scary? Uh?
Twenty dollars? Okay, now you're gonna go shopping, don't you? Yes,
(01:33):
I'm sure you do. Let's go. Let's play it again.
Let's not do that any music here? Scary, There we go.
Our first caller of the day is Mary. Hi, Mary, Hi, Hi,
Hi Hi. Are you just early already? Door dashing? Yes? Yes.
(01:54):
I First of all, let me just say I cannot
believe that I'm talking to you guys. Thank you very
I love that, and I love I love that we
have something in common. We're both door dashing right now?
What are you door dashing? What do you do? Ring? Well?
I'm actually not on one right now. I logged out
because I didn't want to get an order and then
not be able to talk. But normally at this time
(02:17):
I am delivering George Ce's order. I get it every
time at the same day, and it's usually Duncan doughnuts Okay,
and yeah, Duncan donuts McDonald's eye how um, oh my god.
They eat. They eat like royalty over there. George C.
Motors or whatever it is. That is so cool. Yeah,
(02:39):
it's just George C. So long? How long we've been
working with them every day? I mean, are you forming
like a bond and like a friendship with them? Oh,
there's Mary, Come on in, Mary's got breakfast. Oh well,
I don't actually go in the house. Um, I just
delivered to their door, but they do know me. They're
sitting in there waiting and try to have a little conversation,
(02:59):
little pick me up in the morning. And then you know,
you're a You're all the way down on Merritt Island
in Florida. We're all the way up in New York City,
our own little island. I wish you could drive up
some breakfast. I'm kind of hungry. Yeah, just drop your location, okay, Mary.
You know, Mary and all the warriors who are out
early and making the world wake up and get started,
(03:19):
or taking care of people who are ending their shift
and stuff. Stuff like that you do is really important. Mary,
never forget that. And thanks for listening to us every
day on the ride. Well, well, thank you. And I
just want to say, UM, I actually texted UM, or
not texted, but message Danielle UM a couple of weeks ago, UM,
(03:40):
and she was so sweet to respond back to me.
And I appreciate it so much. UM. There is I
think maybe it was the July or the August first
show or somewhere around in there. You guys, Um you
Elvis actually got really choked up and UM when you
were talking about it about animals that we have to
(04:01):
put to sleep. Yes, I remember that very well. Yes,
and that was um the friday before that show, I
had to put my cat down and it was the
most devastating thing ever because it was we didn't have
him long enough and it was such a journey that
we didn't think we were going to have him in
the very beginning to begin with. I raised him from
(04:23):
three weeks old with you know, feeding him with a syringe.
He was a rescued Oh, Mary, sounds like sounds like
you are a great mom, you know, and they are
they are angels in our lives and then they fly
away and we missed them so much. And I think
about the day. You know, I'm not a very spiritual
religious guy. Yeah, but I do think. You know what,
I would like to know there's a heaven so I
(04:44):
can go see my I can go see my pets
that I lost along the way. Look, Mary, we've got
a run and you've got work to do. We're gonna
send you some scrubs and I want you to listen
to us every day. And God bless you and your
family and your kitten and all the best to you today.
Be careful that there. Okay, thank you guys. So March
and I'm so excited. I cannot believe I got through.
This is the best day ever. Well, we're excited to
(05:05):
hold on much a second. Be careful on the road.
You'll be very careful. There's some crazies out there, people
like Dan Yeller driving around. Well, no, I'm not siding
air right now. The world is safer for one moment.
I know. It was great hearing from Mary. Let's roll
into the three things we need to know from Gandhi's
and we get on with our day. Gandhi. President Biden
is set to sign the Inflation Reduction Act into law
(05:25):
today that was pushed through the House late last week,
just days after it narrowly passed the Senate. A White
House statement said the measure will lower prescription drug prices
in addition to fighting climate change and reducing the deficit.
People traveling from all three major airports in and around
New York City faced delays last night. The FAA blamed
the delays on what is called unexpected staff availability. Around
(05:47):
five pm yesterday, the FAA warned that those staffing shortages
would lead to delays of two hours at JFK, LaGuardia,
and Newark airports. The FAA then said in its tweet
it had to reduce the flow to aircraft around New
York to maintain safety. A little after nine pm, they
called off ground delays at JFK and Newark after staffing
picked up, But they expect that to happen often, so
(06:08):
just plan ahead if you're traveling. And finally, let's talk
about how robots are really going to take over the world.
We've talked about it in the past, but now a
company called Shaomi has revealed its first humanoid robot. This
thing is five foot nine and it's named cyber One.
It has arms and legs that allow it to walk
like a human, and the AI lets it detect forty
five human emotions. It can also recognize eighty five different
(06:32):
sounds and has tech that lets it see in three
D space. The announcement of this robot comes just weeks
before Tesla is set to reveal a robot of its
own that's also a humanoid. The current version of this
other robot will cost you about one hundred thousand dollars,
so hopefully everybody's not going to get them, and the
takeover will be slower, but we'll see. And those are
your three things. Wow. Also waking up to some stories
(06:53):
coming out of Miami Dade. A police officer was shot
in the head after a car chase suspect. The acted
gunman is dead. We don't eat know any more information.
I know the shot officers was shot is in the
hospital and fighting for his or her life. So as
the men and women get out there to keep us safe,
we were thinking about you. Thank you so much for
(07:15):
putting your lives and your family's life on hold sometimes
just to take care of us. Anyway. We'll let you
know when we heard more of that. You guys ready
for two days? You know what, Let's go give it
a try. The whole show really is on a slippery
Elvis Duran in the Morning Show, we all know that
banks make it pretty difficult to redeem credit card awards.
So let's talk about Discover. You can get your rewards
(07:38):
in cash in any amount, at any time. Talk about amazing.
Learn more at discover dot com. Slash redeem rewards terms apply,
follow me, follow us, Elvis Durran Show, and in the
Morning Show, I don't know st of those nights went
to bed early. I'm so excited. Yeah, and I woke
up naturally. I'm like, oh my god, it's one thirty,
(08:01):
isn't It's weird? Does this ever happen to you? I
found out while I was awake, was awake at the
very same time. How about that? I know, I woke
up at one oh seven. It's weird because I'm sitting
there and I'm like, oh god, I'm the only idiot
that's awake right now. Then I felt my phone. I'm like,
oh God, who's that. It's great? Its me. I was bored,
started cruising the internet sending new stuff. Well, I was
(08:22):
I was gonna like text back, I'm no, leave him alone.
He maybe he gnadded off and you just you don't
want to do it, and then we would have engaged
in conversation, which would have kept us both up so
much long. No offense, but conversation with you is it's
a it's a like a sleeping pill. Oh, letting you
talk to me? Were you're right back to sleep? Which
(08:43):
I wanted to stay up. I wanted to stay invigorated. O. God,
I didn't want you to bring me down. My son
woke up this morning when I was getting ready for work.
He comes out of the room. Mah, the cat throw
up a hair ball in my room. Could you go
clean it up? Because he was asleep, but I was
just awake and I was like, I got it, and
(09:03):
I went in there and he goes, isn't gone. I'm like, yes,
he went back to bed. Wow. Hey, um, I did
not bring my ATM card and I need some cash
for after the show. I need to borrow twenty dollars
from each and everyone. Okay, okay, okay, guys, I'll have
cash on you at all times. I don't have any cares. Actually,
I went to the bank machine yesterday yeah, so I
(09:26):
have some can Don't you love going to that That machine?
I love that machine just gives me stuff. I know,
it's like going to vegas. Oh here's okay, I got
twenty from Now can I venmo? You can? Someone give
him twenty dollars and I'll venmow them any cash you
want me, I'll give him a fifty. Okay, so I
have fifty fifteen. If I'm covering Gnehi, I gotta give
(09:48):
you a fifty. It means, oh you ten. I had
to borrow money from Daniell the other day. I never
have cash. Oh my god, is that grant on a fifty?
But how much cash you have there, Scottie? How much?
How much you have? I have ten, but they're all two?
Oh no, no, no, thank you give those back down,
(10:09):
Please give those back. Nobody wants me. What is this?
It's an iou you keep buying anything with that look
it says I owe eight twenty dollars. I have to
sign it. I want to make sure I get it back.
You should do it right one too, Danielle fifty. Yeah,
Elvis drag, I trust him all right? Oh your twenty
dollars get right here? I know you know, there's there's
(10:30):
really nothing else on that that loan sheet that tells
me when I have to say it back. Andrew is
a notary, Andrew, could you notarize this one? There still
he could pay back in ten years. I'm only at
seventy I need I need thirty more. Scary, I'm not
taking singles. I only have eight dollars and singles and
I could do the iou for twelve dollars. I have another. No,
I need cash. I don't say I can't spend it
on exactly you stop yelling, Stop yelling. I just need
(10:53):
some cash. Here's an out of ten family has three dollars.
I need twenty dollars. What do you need this for? Hey, diamond,
I need twenty dollars? What do you got? Okay? Twenty okay,
thank you? Good thing you're not here today. I would,
Oh no, I would. I would give you whatever I
had in my pocket. What isn't your pocket? Nothing? Hold
on oat? Twenty dollars in my bucket? What are you doing?
(11:19):
What's that? This is foreign cash? I have, I have
rupies and I have your rope. I'm not going to
India today. That's all I got. Are you carrying rupies
because I keep telling myself I'm going to go to
the bank and exchange it for actual money, and then
I don't, so I just walk around with how long
have you had rupies in your pocket? I got forty
rupees in my pocket. You can have all this. Oh,
(11:41):
Froggie got sixty bucks. He's in Florida. You can veno you. Okay, okay,
we got to move forward. So right now, I have
fifty sixties seventy eight. I've got eighty dollars. I just
need twenty more and I met my goal here, I'll
throw it to you here, Okay, okay, thanks. It's not
working that way, no matter. With twos. What about Garrett, Garrett,
where's your money? People don't too but it's money. It's
(12:03):
kind of jankety money. I mean, ones are more acceptable
than twos. Isn't it sad? But it's true. I have
another twenty if you want it. If if everyone else
is being so damn cheap in this role, I've got
twelve hundred and fifty rupees, which I think ends up
being like I'm not gonna go convert money today seven dollars.
(12:28):
It's rupees, and I mean it's bad enough, I got
a fifty. Enough people are trying to throw me at two.
All right, here we go. I'm feeling I'm feeling good.
I feel like we're almost there to my goal. Ok
What was your question? Well, if I can, if I
give you eight singles? No, your question was what am
I going to use all this money? What are you
going to use all this money? I can't tell you that.
I mean I kind of need to know. I want
(12:51):
to know. What do you need to do? If you
loan the money to me, it's now my money until
I pay it back, so I can spend it anyway
I want. Okay, all right, all right, let's get into
the horoscopes with producer Sam. Hey, Sam, who are you
doing them? With? Zoom? With Scottie today? Because I like
his haircut? Okay, how are you? If it's your birthday today,
you celebrate it with Kathie Lee Gifford, Madonna and Angela
(13:13):
Bassett best friends. Capricorn, don't depend on others to make
you happy. Focus on yourself first. Your day is an
eight Aquarius. Procrastinating on a big project will only cause
you to slow your progress in several other areas, so
be careful your days of six Pisces. Patience is a virtue.
Use it to guide you when speaking with others. Your
day is a nine aries. Give or help whenever you can.
(13:34):
You're building good karma points. Your days and nine Taurus.
Do not over commit yourself to events and parties that
will only keep you from the mental clarity you crave.
Your day is an eight gem and I. Educate yourself
on an alternative option before launching yourself into an argument
with someone. Your days seven Cancer, you have a lot
to offer others with your sage, wisdom and advice. Your
days of nine Leo, don't go off assumptions. Seek truth
(13:56):
at whatever cost. Your days and eight Virgo, be aware
of your limits. Do not push yourself too far. Your
days of ten Libre, you've lost focus on your goals.
Make it a point to create a vision board of
where you are and where you want to go. Your
days of five Scorpio, there is unfinished business left for
you to handle. Figure it out before it's too late.
Your days of six and finally, Sagittarius, watch out that
(14:17):
envy might be controlling too many decisions you're making. Your
days of seven and those are your Tuesday morning horoscopes.
M Oh, wait, I did bring money? Are you kidding me?
Oh my god? Okay, okay, okay, can I borrow twenty dollars?
That reminds me? No? No, okay, well okay, here's how
it works. You have to ask the people who loaned
me money if you can borrow twenty dollars. Okay, understood?
All right? So so it was a fifty from Danielle. Yeah,
(14:40):
but do you want it back? Yeah? Well, unless you
need it. No, I forgot I have money. Oh, then
I'll take it back. I think she needs twenty dollars.
She don't need nothing, all right, I have a twenty
and a ten? Who may that's all you? No, wasn't
wasn't the ten Scott? Oh no, those two dollars? All right?
That was that was an experiment to see who would
honey up and who would take care of me. That's
(15:01):
not fair. I didn't have any cash on me, and
every one of you did your very best to try
to make sure big Daddy has his cash. Yeah. Yeah,
So therefore I love you. You know what, And you
know my rule about loaning money is you never loan money.
You give it to him knowing you're never gonna see
it again, right, even if you have that little iou nate? Yeah. Oh,
by the way, where's it right there? Rip it? Yeah? Yeah,
(15:25):
I'm sure that would have held up in Andrew's a notary.
I want to run in there quick, Daniel, would you
have coming up? Oh? Adele talking about that canceled Las
Vegas residency and Nipsey Hustle got his star in the
Hollywood Walk of Fame. There you go. What's that smell?
It smells like citrus? You like that? Yeah, this is
(15:45):
the first time since COVID I can actually smell something
as it's supposed to be. Welcome back. Yeah, time to
get any time for COVID again. Yeah. This part of
today's show, we listen with Elvis Duran on demand. The
entire show uploaded every day only on the radio app
show Worldwide Travel picking up since twenty twenty two or
(16:07):
in twenty twenty two. But the Marriott International Hotel Group
pretty big hotel chain, right, They announced that twenty gigabytes
of sensitive data including guests credit card information, stolen in
June of this year. So doesn't mean if you want
to a Marriott in June that they stole your stuff.
But look, every time you go online to order something,
(16:27):
your information is out there. You don't know who gets it.
Your personal information, it's exposed. It's exposed everywhere. It's dangerous.
Cyber criminals are out there stealing your stuff. You need
to protect yourself like we do with LifeLock by Norton.
LifeLock detects alert you to potential identity threats that may
not spot you may not spot on your own and
like loans taken out in your name, how about that. No,
(16:51):
if you do become a victim of identity theft, they
have a dedicated US based restoration specialist who will work
to fix it. So how do you get involved in
the LifeLock It's this simple to live flock dot com.
Use the promo code Elvis. This is the worst commercial ever.
(17:11):
Gonna give him make good LifeLock loves us may start over. Yeah,
go to liflock dot com. Use the promo code Elvis. Wow,
you got a lot off. You can save some money
twenty five percent off your first year. That's livelock dot com.
Use the promo code Elvis. Live show. This is a
very very important day. It's it's a national roller coaster day. Yeah,
(17:32):
and you know we all love roller coasters. You're actually
going to be on one today. I'm so excited of
going back to Playland in Rye Playland, which is in Rye,
New York. Yes, and I'm going to ride the Dragon
Coaster with my family team. That's an iconic, old school
wooden coaster. It's in like the textbooks. That's how have
you ever been up to Coney Island to ride the
(17:53):
Cyclone course? The Cyclone? Okay, this is an all Gandhi
do you like? Do you like a roller coaster? Because
the Cyclone is an all wood roller coaster. It's I mean,
it's old, it's been there forever. It beats the living
crap out of you. You get off that you're in
two days later you were nothing but a big bruise. Totally.
It's awesome. They have one of those. So have you
heard of King's Island in Ohio? Absolutely, King's Island is awesome.
(18:15):
They have one of those. It's called the Beast. It's
this massive wooden roller coaster and I'm telling you you
don't wear a bra on that thing. Your boobs clap
the whole way, bobs the whole way. Yeah, roller coasters.
I really want to be on one other than the
roller coaster of life, which we're on every day, right,
and that today is also National tele a Joke Day.
(18:35):
So I've I've assigned to Danielle and Froggy and Gandhi
and Scurry and straight Nate. You know I'm gonna sign it.
I'm gonna sign it to to Diamond too. Oh, where's
Diamond's button? Right? Oh, here's Diamond. You need to have
a joke ready to go? Oh yeah, okay, okay, okay,
it can be a short joke. I'll give you one.
(18:58):
So give you like oxious obnoxious one. Yes, make it funny.
Knock knock? Who's there too? To whom? Knock knot? The
little old lady? The little old lady. I didn't know
you could yodel any a As we kick off National
(19:22):
Joke Day, who's there? Ida Idaho? I don't know, um Idaho.
I don't want to go down that room. Knock knock,
who's there? There? A broken pencil? A broken pencil? Who
never mind? It's pointless, all right? So anyway we move on.
(19:43):
It is that should tell a Joke Day. By the way,
none of those qualified is my official joke. Okay, And
we'll do this in like twenty minutes. Okay, okay, I
like that first one a lot. I'm going to use
that knock knock, who's there too? To who? To whom?
That there's like an English teacher's chow. That's my mom
all the way. I think you meant to whom? You know?
(20:06):
I don't know? All right, Daniel, you ready? Yeah? Okay?
What do you have? Good going on too? All right?
So Adele did an interview with Elle magazine talking about
why she canceled her Las Vegas residency. She said she
was devastated to disappoint the fans, but she said she
felt like there was no soul in it. The stage
setup wasn't right. She said, it was disconnected from me,
my band. She gays it lacked intimacy. She said, maybe
(20:29):
I try too hard to give it these things in
such a controlled environment. She was embarrassed at first, and
she went into hiding. She even created a pseudo Twitter
account so she could get the scoop on what fans
were saying about her. She saw a bunch of critical comments,
so she deleted it. In the end, she said canceling
that show gave her more confidence because she stood by
(20:50):
her artistic needs, and you know we're getting her new
her new show in Vegas, so that's all good. Ben
Affleck and j Loo are celebrating their wedding this weekend
in Ben's home in Georgie. I told you guys they
were going to be throwing a big ass party, and
it's gonna be a big ass party. I don't know
who's coming exactly. Party was nothing but big asses, exactly.
I wish I'd was inviided, but my ass is flat,
(21:10):
so that didn't happens. Hustle would have been thirty seven
years old yesterday and he got his star in the
Hollywood Walk of Fame, and now August fifteenth will be
known as Nipsy Hustle Day in Los Angeles, so that's
pretty cool. The Jonas Brothers are doing their second Las
Vegas residency. It'll be at the Doe, will be live
(21:31):
at Park MGM three shows in November, the tenth to
the twelfth. Tickets will go on sale Friday. New trailer
for she Hulk Attorney at Law. It comes out this
Thursday and Disney Plus, so if you want to, you
want to check that out. Oh and Matten twenty three.
I don't even know when Madden twenty three comes out. Frog,
Do you know when it comes out? No, it's usually
right around the beginning of football season. Okay, well they
(21:53):
yesterday they showed previews of like tips and tricks and
all the players and stuff. So it looks like it's
pretty cool and if you where I fan, you're gonna
want to get your hands on that. Also, there's a
preview for the mass singer. It is actually the eighth
season already. They're not telling you the names of the
costumes yet, but it looks like there's a harp and
a mermaid, a Venus flight trap, a porcupine, a jack
(22:16):
O lantern, a snowflake. Yeah. Anyway, Wednesday, September twenty first
is when the new show starts, and Snoop Dogg is
going to keep giving us a new cereal Snoop Bloops.
I know. Let Scotty Be's excited about this, and Andrew
for serial Killers. Some of the pro seeds are gonna
benefit charities like Door of Hope, so that's cool if
it will help the homeless out. It's gluten free, but
(22:37):
it has marshmallows, but there is no cannabis, so don't
worry about that. You can have What are we watching?
Jimmy Levado will be on with Fallon for three nights
starting tonight. America's Got Talent is on Password with Jimmy
Fallon is on The Murdering Story and beet you've got
that head? Hey, hey, we're Jimmy Fallon on our show. Okay,
what time? What time? A little bit, a little bit
(22:58):
back to you, and Hottie is on who That starts today?
Four hot singles on Blind Dates, Battle to cook up
Date Night Worthy dishes. We're getting desperate guys, We're getting
desper cooking and that's what. Okay, So Nat and have
been rehearsing the next jokes. You're ready, Yeah, see if
you can figure this one out. Okay, move, move, knock knock,
(23:19):
who's there? I'm traveling cow? See you got it? Knock knock,
who's there? Control freak? Now you say control freak coup? Okay,
do the cal on again? Okay, here we go. Move,
(23:44):
knock knock, who's there? I'm traveling cow? Oh my god, Hey, Elvis,
where did calparts come from? Where did calparts come from?
The dairy air? What the hell do we do for
a living? How mister ran in the Morning Show. Two
hundred years before Game of Thrones, Targarians ruled West Roast
(24:07):
with an army of dragons. The only thing that could
tear down the House of the Dragon was itself. Don't
miss the new HBO original series House of the Dragon,
premiering this Sunday at nine pm on HBO. Maxter Ran
in the Morning Show. There you go, National Joke Day,
National roller coaster today? What else is it today? It's
like a facted day. Let me guess National rum Day
(24:27):
as well. Rum. You know who loves rum? Ah, the Pirates.
I might have to get me a little booty today.
What that word booty? You know, when I was growing up,
I was a little kid. I didn't know what a
booty was. And my brothers, who were older than me,
they would take me out and they'd hang out with
(24:48):
her friends at whatever place, and you know, they'd all
go from car to car and they were drinking and
hanging up with each other. And my brother said, see
that girl in that car over there, Yeah, go over there,
you tell her she's got a fine booty. Okay, okay, brother,
you my brother, Hey, my brother told me to tell
you you've got a mighty fine boot oh goodness, and
(25:12):
you know they dated for like three months. They dated.
I was my brother's wing brother. Let move. I know
just from the word booty booty. Say it with me,
booty booty. What do you have here? Oh Saucy Santana,
(25:32):
baby booty boy whatever, the word booty doesn't do it.
Justice boy, body body, body, body, body body like my
boy body body, body, body, body, bodydy body body body.
(25:54):
You have a disc box, so many booty songs out there,
we don't let me here nam in for the booting booty?
All right? How about bub was this ever hit? Those
(26:25):
little guns? It starts major Asian Bruno Mars. How come
booty songs on like tongue twisters like the extended remix
person buffle blame bubble bubble but bubble blame, bubble, bubble
(26:47):
blame bubble bubble, bubble but turn around, stickt out, bubble blame,
bubble bubble butt, bubble blame, bubble bubble blame, bubble bubble butt,
turn around, stick it out, don't turn into the kids
(27:08):
cooking looks s I another but song me the ultimate
butt song of all time? Scary Yeah. I like big
butts and I can'tnot lie you other brothers did tonight.
And when a girl washing with anybody wasting a round
thing in your face, you get sprung. You want to
pull up because you notice that bud was stuck. Even
(27:31):
a jency's wearing I'm hooking. I can't stop staring the
whole baby. I want to get a whod job and
take your big job. My whole boys trying to warn
me with that, but you've got made me roper smooth skin.
You say you want to get my bins, well use me,
use me, because you ain't that an average group be
I see, I'm damn sing to he broke Man said,
(27:53):
he sweat. You got it going like a turrible flat
I'm tired of magazines saying flat butts on average. You
gotta pack much back, so Fellows fell shake shake, shake, shake,
shaked healthy, But baby got a ball. My favorite line
(28:15):
in there began Rice didn't miss her. We went to
a party on the beach in California. Once. It was
a big It was a music company party. That that
was their song, right, it was that long ago. They
actually floated this massive butt on the ocean, specific ocean
all the way up to the beach. This butt was
like ten feet tall. It's a big ass, but it
(28:37):
was so much fun back in the days when record
companies spent money. Anyway, so you know, it is National
Joke Day and I've challenged you all to come up
with a joke. We're doing that in a few minutes,
and you know what, they're probably not going to be
the most funniest of jokes. Yeah, I got some. I
got some good ones in a while. You can't do
your mom was so fat jokes? Why why? Because you know,
(29:00):
you know what, twenty five years ago you could Now
people are very sensitive about weight issues. I'm not talking
about a specific mom. This is very general. But you
give me one. Let's see if it flies. Your mom's
so fat? Yeah, let your deliveries are really well. Here
we go. Yr mom was so fat when she fell.
I didn't laugh, but the sidewalk cracked up. Oh okay
(29:24):
with that one diamond. Yr Mom was so fat when
she wears high heels, she strikes oil. Don't it's a
geological joke. Yoma was so fat when she goes camping.
The bear side their food all right, all right, so
you got it's out of your system. It's not. But
I'll let it go. All right. Jimmy Falon's on a
(29:46):
little over an hour from now. He'll be on password.
I do believe. Also, we have a thousand dollars Eminem's
crunchy cookie free money phone tap that's on the way.
We've got a lot of stuff to get too. Rister
ran in the morning shows, sing an eye anyone, how
come these gulls and didn't invite anyone to the prom?
(30:08):
Just didn't have the guts anyone. These jokes are so bad.
Only Nate laughs at bad jokes. That's so funny. It's
not funny. The whole point. Didn't have the guts, didn't
have the guts. Hey Elvis, Yes, yes frog. Somebody asked
me if my stomach was flat. I said yes, but
(30:28):
the l was silent. On What did one butt cheeks
said to the other butt cheeks? What between you and me?
It's stinks in here? You have that inphasema? Laugh again
on the beach. Here's Nate, Oh my gosh, started after COVID.
(30:53):
I've got that emphasyma. I know we all have it,
all right, So it's National telejoke Day. You should like
make your friends happy, make it smile, or at least
get a groan out of them. I enjoy a bad
joke just as much as a good joke. Yes, there's
another reason to torment someone. God, that's awful. Yes, you
know the key you're telling a bad joke? What is
to laugh at it yourself? Yes? And you do that? Yeah,
(31:15):
here's scary. Go ahead, someone stole my mood ring. I
don't know how I feel about that. All right, Oh,
there's more. Hold on back school, all his scrabble letters
on the road. I asked him, what's the word on
the street? Okay, all right, well all right, I don't
know how we followed that up. All right, Danielle, okay,
come on, So why don't they play poker in the jungle?
(31:38):
Why why too many cheetahs? Danielle? Wait, hold on now, Diamond,
you said you're gonna do a joke. Oh yeah, ready, yeah, okay,
not not who's there? Hutch? Hutch? Who God bless you
keep doing it? You'll laughing a joke when it's not funny.
(32:00):
I don't get what the hut I was like, what
if you if you stopped down and try to break
it down? It kind of come on, froggy, come on,
all right, when you die? What is the last part
of your body to stop working? What your pupils they dilate? Okay, Scotty,
(32:25):
did you come up with one? Come on, Scotty, But
I can't tell the one from before, so I'll tell
a different one. Um, that one? That one was good?
Why can't you tell the one from before? I don't
think it's I don't think it's nice. Then don't tell it. Okay?
What's a plumber's least favorite vegetable? Why leaks? No? Maybe
you should tell the first one? Should I tell it?
(32:48):
I don't know? Can I forgot it? What it was?
I don't remember? What? Why is an orphan bad at baseball? Why? Okay? What?
Because he doesn't know where home is? Oh? God? What?
All right? Um? Can I can I do some? You're
gonna do your mama, so I will save my your
mama jokes for later. No, your mama jokes are good.
You go right ahead, Gundi. Your mama's so nasty. They
(33:11):
used to call them jump a lanes till she bounced
on one. Oh no, okay? Why does snoop dog carry
an umbrella? Why does snoop dog carry an umbrella? Drizzle?
All right? I got one. I got one. Yes, Danielle,
what do you call an exploding duck? What quack? All
(33:33):
your punch lines are like bronx act. Here comes Nate.
I was just gonna suggest we get a laugh track.
These are some great laugh track. Scary, where's our laugh track?
I do have one, though, your yes, go right ahead?
Knock knock? Who's there interrupting? Dyslexic cow interrupting? Boom? Can
(33:59):
I do your mama joke? Yes, your mama jokes. Your
mama is so poor Nigerian princess. Why are her money?
He ganda? Your mom is so poor, chases the gardens
truck with a grocery list. I don't know if you're
supposed to direct. I know I was directing it. Okay, scary?
Your mom was so ugly she threw a boomerang and
it refused to come back. Mama's teeth so yellow. I
(34:24):
can't believe it's not butter Okay, scary. Your mama is
so poor. The ducks through a bread at her. All right,
well this has been a lot of time. Sorry missus scary,
Sorry missus Gandhi. All right, well there you go, so
tell a joke to a friend. Feel free to come
up with your own. You don't have to use hours
(34:44):
Danielle anymore like Bronx accent. Definite Yeah, Froggy, I wish
suck on Johnny was here to tell his little boy
blue joke. No no, no no. We should not have
gotten away with that then, and we definitely can'tnot get
away with that. Ma God, we do have a one
thousand dollars Eminems crunchy cookie free money phone tap on
(35:05):
the way. Jimmy Fallon On a little over an hour
from now, he's gonna be on password. I love Jimmy fallonellig.
It's a diamond on the phone. If you want to
know how people are when they're not on camera, Jimmy
Fallon when not on camera is just as fun as
he is when he is on camera. He's just always
a nice guy. I would love to play games with him,
(35:26):
until jokes with him. Anyway, he'll be on with us,
and it's a little bit Gandhi the three things we
need to know what's going on? All right? Three high
profile Republicans will be on primary election ballots in Alaska
and Wyoming today. Wyoming congresswoman and staunch Trump critic Liz
Cheney will be on the ballot. In Alaska, Republicans Senator
Lisa Murkowski's will face her opponent and former Alaska governor
and two thousand and eight GOP vice presidential candidate Sarah
(35:49):
Palin is on the ballot for the state's sole US
House seat as well. The New Mexico Medical Investigator's Office
has ruled that Alec Baldwin's fatal shooting of a cinematographer
last year was an accident. Cinematographer Helena Hutchins was fatally
wounded when that prop gun he was holding fired a
live round on the set of the movie Rusted last October.
It happened near Santa Fe, which was near you Elvis,
(36:11):
and its report, released yesterday, the Medical Investigator's Office says
the shooting was accidental because there was no obvious intent
to cause harm or death. And finally, a main state
capitol police officer is lucky that he's not hurt and
lucky to be alive after a falling airplane part just
missed him. It was a six to seven pound steel sleeve.
(36:32):
It smashed to the ground outside the main entrance to
the capital on Friday afternoon. An officer who works as
a screener at the building, was walking about ten feet
away from it and it fell out of the sky.
Obviously he was not expecting that. The FAA is investigating
and says the part is likely from a large airliner
or an international route and they have no idea what happened.
But hey, is that blue ice saying a true thing?
(36:53):
What do you mean? They say like airplanes when they
fly over sometimes they said the blue ice is like
frozen pe from the toilets in the air lanes. I
mean maybe, so we look this up. Yes, do google
on blue ice. Blue. Yeah, you don't name your kid
blue ice for obvious reasons. Blue ice falls out of
out of airplanes. I don't know that's it. Yeah, what
(37:15):
does it say? It's frozen sewage material that has leaked
mid flight from a commercial aircraft lavatory waste. Yeah, so
blue ice lends next to you in the front yard.
Don't eat that. That's not that's not a summertime treat.
I know. You learn something new on the show on
National Joke, Hey you're one thousand dollars. Eminem's crunchy cookie
free money phone tap coming up next. Miss part of
(37:37):
today's show, We listen with Elvis durand on demand. The
entire show uploaded every day. A lot of people listen
to us on demand on the radio app show Jimmy
Fallon's gonna be on just a little bit. I love
him and I can't stop talking about him. Yeah, he's
a nice guy. Who else do we love? Who else
out there? Is like so much fun and you always
(37:58):
want to tell the world, you know what, this celebrity
you see on the TV the time? Very nice. Michael Bubley,
Michael Buble, nice guy. Oh, Josh Grobin, Josh Groban, very cool,
nice guy. These are long guys. I have faith that
Meg the Stallion is. When we talk to her the
other day, she was awesome, and I think she's like
that all the time. She's very nice. Yeah, always nice
to be true, Um Megan Stallion see Lizzo? Good God? Yeah,
(38:22):
always nice. And it's it's funny because you know, we've
been doing this a long time. Sometimes they come in
Nato coming to go, you know what. They're in the
waiting room. They're not in a very good movie, they're
not very talkative, and they come in and they're great, right,
and then they leave and they go back to that.
So sometimes sometimes they turn it on. You know they're on,
and I get that, but you know the ones that
(38:44):
are on in front of the mic and in the
back the background, we're gonna tell you about them. We're
gonna report back to you right. Let you know. That's
really cool, nice people. So we don't say anything about them.
Is that our sign that we didn't like them? Could be?
People ask that all the time. I'm like, I don't know.
I don't know what to tell you there, so you
know what I talk. I gotta be honest though I
(39:04):
cannot think back to anyone I didn't care for. They've
all been good. We've been very lucky with guests on
the show. And get Glaciers. That's another one. Yeah he's
still doing how's he doing? Frog? He used to be
good friends with him. Are you you still are? Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah,
we're good. He's doing great and he and Anna are
doing wonderful. Kids are great now, they're He's still touring
and doing his thing now. It's great. Is he still
at jackass? Yes? If you fall asleep anywhere around and
(39:28):
he will still draw a weener on your face. Changed
one bit and I call him a jack ass out
of nothing, But love. We love him so much. He
really is nice. Anyway, let's get into it. You got
any money, Yeah, the free money phones have this week
from our friends at Eminem's Crunchy Cookie. What was it
you were just saying? Gandhi? Oh my god, they're so good.
(39:50):
I busted open a little back yesterday, so I'm just
gonna have a few, no full bag later. They're really good.
They are good, delicious crunchy cookie flavor you love. It's
right inside your favorite chok with candy. Eminem's candy, of course,
the perfect sweet snack to share with your friends, or
be like us and be stingy. Don't let anyone touch
one of them? Is it all my? These are my
(40:11):
Eminem's Crunchy Cookies. Anyway, I at your local retailer. They're
waiting for you. Go to Elvis Durand dot com and
see how you can enter to win a trip to
our iHeart Radio Music Festival in Vegas thanks to Eminem's
Crunchy Cookie. And you're giving a thousand dollars Now. If
you're called on one hundred with a free money phone,
tap one eight hundred two four two zero one hundred.
Who does the phone taps carry got Elvis Elvis durand
(40:32):
the Elvis durand phone tap. All right, Garrett, what's your
phone tap about today? So Cam wants to phone tap
her dad Rick. Now Cam has been called out at
work for slacking off, and her dad was like, hey, listen,
you gotta get your act together or else, you know,
you could be fired eventually. So we're gonna start the
call to Cam's dad Rick as if she just got
fired by me. Oh god, alright, Dad's don't like that
(40:53):
kind of stuff. All right, we'll see what happens in
Garrett's phone tap. Let's listen to it now. Far Yeah, Hey, Ken,
Marry are you are you okay? I'm just working out.
I'm on, I'm on tread mill. Am. I think we
just got fired? Let me get off to hold on,
(41:14):
let me turn out. What did you just say? I
think just got fired from my job? What are you
talking about? What are you doing here? Get your stuff?
Get out of here? How simple is that? You're getting
any here? Minute? One more minute? No yea, get out
of here, get your stuff and go. Hey telling him
(41:37):
to hold you give the phone to him, you stump,
get out of here. You're fired, you honey, put him
on the phone. Put him on the phone. You might
be able to talk to him. What is it? Let
me talk to you for a second. Listen, my daughter
is sweet girl, right, the girl right, great story, and
I don't know what's going on to her, but uh,
you know, look, I'm sure there's some reasonable explination about
(42:00):
what's what your daughter has been doing. Just tell me
what she's been doing. She's been posting pictures on an
Instagram account called my boss Sucks, and it's pictures of
me with a dog face on it. First off, so alright, alright, guys,
(42:20):
trace it back here. You've been get out of here
getting there, Hold on, Hold on, second, it's been traced back.
Are you familiar with the it? I had my IT
department trace back to where it came from. It came
from her IP address that has linked to her phone
connected to our WiFi through the work office, from the
(42:41):
phone that she has from us, So I know every
single thing that she's been doing. She's been posting pictures
of me with different little silly faces on There's one
where I look like an angel, which I look pretty
good at. But I'm on I'm on a website called
my boss sucks. Hey. Look, look, I'm sure there's some
explanation about this. This is She's not that kind of purpose.
Right right right right right right right right right right?
(43:04):
So what are you still doing here? Hold on, hold on,
mister Pearson. Please, I understood what you're doing. My daughter
putting up the streets of you sucking. I don't that's
just I wasn't sucking. It was just my boss sucks.
I'm terribly sorry. You know. Look, I will take care
of this, and she will make this right to you.
(43:26):
All right, here's your daughter. I get it. You gotta
get out of here, all right. Get out of the
office right now. Turn and walk out the door right now.
Don't say anything to him. You understand, No, no, you
do this. I'm telling you to do. Let up. He
fires you do you understand who's wrong with you? Cam Lee?
(43:47):
Tell me you're walking out the door, because I am
walking out this door now and I'm getting in the
car and I'm coming to get you. You don't get it.
Everyone does this. That's ridiculous, Cam and you know it.
It's just stupid. Hey, Rick, Oh yeah, mister Parson, I'm
so sorry. She's still there. I'm trying I'm trying to
get her out the door. Rick. It's all good. Actually,
I'm My name is Garrett from Elvista end of the
(44:09):
Morning show, and you've been phone tapped. Is this about
the Terran show? Yes, sir, oh god, you pulled me
off the treadmill for this crap. Yes, we did, Thank
you very much, Garrett. That's your four thousand, one thousand,
Oh god, well that was a mistake. One thousand free dollars,
(44:31):
free money, phone taps. Wow. Wow, we almost a get away,
a lot of money, four days worth of stuff. Hey, Sean, stop.
This is the same of saying the same way that
people react like, hey Sean, shut up. Okay, Well hey Sean,
your call her one hundred Oh my god. Um well
(44:52):
I'm seaseless. That's awesome. Ok. Thank you so much. You
don't say anything. You can do whatever you want. You
owned the day. You got a thousand dollars coming to
you thanks to Eminem's cr cookie. Amazing, awesome, thank you.
What are you doing today, Sean, I'm driving to work.
I'm a teacher in North Philly. Teachers, yeah, and we
love our teachers, all right, Sean, you'd be careful getting
(45:13):
to work and you have a great day, and thanks
for being a teacher. We appreciate it. Thank you, thanks
for listening. Hold on one second, there you go another thousand.
Dallars Eminem's cookie or crunchy cookie free money phone tap
coming up tomorrow, Danielle, Yes, right, what are we talking about?
What's your favorite story? You're doing today? Which one are
you loving? Well? I think this is funny because Millie
Bobby Brown from Stranger Things you know her as eleven,
(45:36):
has enrolled at Purdue University. Now, the school has actually
been name dropped a few times in Stranger Things takes
place in the fictional town of Hawkins, Indiana, you know that,
and Purdue is that actual city of West Lafayette, Indiana.
So she has signed up and she will be studying
human services, but she'll be studying online. So if you're
(45:56):
going to the college, don't think you're going to see
her walking the hallways, because that's not happy. She don't
have time for that's your favorite story, That's my favorite
story only because I love Stranger Things. R Kelly reportedly
wants jurors who have seen the Lifetime docuseries Surviving r
Kelly to be banned from his second federal trial taking
place in Chicago this week. He says, they're not gonna
(46:17):
look at the evidence. They're gonna go as to what
they saw on the television show. So we know he's
facing lots of new charges and lots of old charges.
So I don't know if they're gonna listen to him,
but we'll see. Black Pink has been added to the
twenty twenty two VMA's lineup Sunday, August twenty eighth. That
will be the K Pops Groups. It will be the
K Pop Groups US Award Show debut, and you know
(46:38):
they have an upcoming single called Pink Venom. I think
they're gonna be performing that and they will be making history.
Is the first Korean female act to perform at the show.
Sabrina Carpenter will be going out on tour. It is
emails I can't send the North American Torque and off
September twenty eighth in Orlando, wrapping things up October sixteenth
in San Francisco. So if you're missing the Saw movie,
(47:00):
they're coming back. Variety says the tenth installment of the
Saw franchise will be with us October twenty seventh of
twenty twenty three. This is why I wanted to have
kids can take him to the sah my God. They
say that they're working very hard to give the fans
what they want and that's what they want the next
(47:22):
movie to be. So we'll see John Wick franchise come
into the small screen. A prequel series was supposed to
be on Stars in twenty twenty eighteen, but obviously that
didn't happen. Now we'll be on Peacock in twenty twenty three.
RuPaul's Drag Race got renewed for a fifteenth season. And
if you had to cast the Ann Hashe biopic, who
(47:44):
would you put as Ann Hasche? I don't know. Got
to think about that right well, when she was asked
this question before she passed away, she said either Miley
Cyrus or Kristen Bell. Oh, so I could totally see
Miley Cyrus doing it now too, So we'll see if
that happens. What are we watching? Well, Demmi Lavano will
be on Fallon for the next three days and also
(48:06):
Fallon will be on with Us very soon password with Jimmy.
Fallon's on tonight as well, America's Got Talent and this
new one called Hoti's over on Hulu. That's on as well.
I think we're just running out of things to put
on your Yeah, anyway, that's my Danielle report. Thank you, Danielle.
That's so stupid. Sounds dope. What is it? Four hot
(48:27):
singles go on blind dates and battle to cook up
date night worthy dishes? Hot people cooking on first date?
Why not? Okay, they're running out of things, Okay, um, gandhi,
what was the show I was talking about. I'm so
into on Netflix your Secret Lives of Pets. I think
if Secret Lives of Pets, Yeah, it's so good. The
thing you have a pet, you don't know half the
(48:48):
stuff that that pets doing. That they're so smart and
their instinctual abilities are just mind blowingly fantastic. I just
watch We started watching last night and we got to
watch another episode. He's like, we gotta got our bed.
It's eight thirty. Come on, let's watch another way. But
last night we'll also watch the season finale of Unconnected, Yes,
(49:10):
Uncoupling with Lee Patrick Harris. It was so good. Yeah,
oh my god, I'm not giving anything away, but I'm
telling you the last episode of the season was a
cliffhanger and a half. It was We're like, what no, stop? No?
Is that the last one? Alex says, yes, no, there
is no god these cliffhangers. So we won't to be
(49:32):
on again another four years. I mean, how do they
take so much time? Yeah, that's what it usually is.
So now we're waiting for what to come back? Yellowstone?
Oh yeah, I'm waiting for Yellowstone to come back. What
else are we waiting for so you can talk into
the microphone? Succession? Yeah? Succession? Oh my god, I'm dying
for Succession as well. What about House of the Dragon
(49:53):
it's going to start that's the Sunday. Yeah, I know
you guys are so excited about House of the Dragon. Yeah,
what you know, I'm not much for TV and stuff,
but my friends told me about the offer, which is
on Paramount. Yes, that's about the making of the Godfather.
God Father. Yeah, so the first three episodes are out
and they're coming out with some war. Eary just did
something to kind of creep me out. What did I do?
(50:14):
It's like your hairy arm was rubbing against my hairy arms.
I saw you pull away quickly, bunch of skin to skin,
it was hair to hair. It was it was like
hairy skinned to hairy skin, Yes, sir. As of July
twenty ninth, they have not renewed uncoupled for a second.
They need to renew that call someone who do we know?
I don't know how it could be changed, but like
(50:36):
July twenty ninth was, who do we know? Who do
we blow? Let's get that thing back? See, I think
this would freak me out here, rub your hairy calf
on my hairy calf, but not not fully, just rub
your calf against white calfe. It's like, I know, it's
(50:59):
so for getting weird. It was like, I don't know
if I want that from you. I did, it would
just be soft. What about ted Lasso? Oh gosh, I
don't know when's the next season. I haven't even heard
of the final season. I could be I don't know.
(51:20):
Let's just circulate a bunch of rumors right now, all right, So,
so far we have highlighted ted Lasso and Succession and
Yellowstone and of the Dragon, which is it's on Sunday.
So you're fine there and unhooked. We're still waiting to
find out this with every name but the actual name
I know, but then to get everyone I guess back
(51:42):
on board for that. Anyway, I thought it was good.
That creeped me out, by the way, that was disturbed.
I'm so glad you're not here to feel my thighs froggy.
Oh I wish I was. Well, that was creepy. He
smells like onions. And the Morning show you could talk
about how complicated other banks make it to redeem credit
(52:04):
card rewards, or you could talk about how with Discover
you can redeem your rewards for cash in any amount
at any time. It's amazing. Learn more at discover dot com.
Slash redeem rewards terms apply on your window. Could turn
up the sound. I don't know what I would do
that in the morning show in the morning, can we
talk about your butt for a minute? Vibrato vibr they
(52:26):
are all they did. The smile on my face, like,
why are you shooting my foot? That is not part
of the pedicut. I didn't even know your foot could
grow hair there sometimes when you laugh a little, do you, Pete.
I just love the show and everything about it show alright, alright, alright,
you know Gandhi always comes up with fun games and
involving our music that we love this and that and
the other. Day, you did songs that achieved diamond status. Yeah,
(52:50):
songs that sold over ten million copies. Yes, and uh
so you know, if you can guess these songs you want,
you won money and everything. And it was easy kind
of because I mean these are huge songs. Yeah, sold
over ten million copies. So I said, gandhi, let's mix
it up. I want you to make it difficult for
people to guess very popular songs. And there's no better
way to do it than making them backward. Yeah, what scary.
(53:12):
If you want an example, do this one, and then
that's the answer to do this. Okay, here's a song
that went diamond, but it's backward. Don't say it out loud,
don't say it. Does anyone here know it? I think so? Yeah?
(53:35):
Does anyone here not know it? Okay, Nate, what do
you think it is? I have no idea. Diana's out
there raising the roof. You know, you guys all know it.
I don't know. I don't know. Tell him what it is?
Frog hardy rock because you can hear the same instruments,
(54:00):
but in rather to going go so you can hear
the chords, you can hear the instrumentation. Yeah, you got
and keep in mind this song. What's scary? What do
you do? If you want another one? Let me know,
I have to feed it to you. Oh that sounds
(54:21):
kind of creepy. Yes, our computer is crapping the bed,
but you know what, we're gonna move on and we're
gonna keep the show going even even with a bed
hould a crap over there. So if you can guess
the diamond status songs that we play backward, you could
win money so called diamond Now one eight hundred two
(54:42):
for two or one hundred do you want another one? Yeah?
Here we go. Oh this is come on. Oh I've
heard it's that. It's that song. Okay, all right, okay,
you're on by that guy. Yes, that's it. There is
(55:07):
there is a guy in Paul. I'm not good at Okay,
then it's okay, I'm not great at it. Okay one
eight hundred two for two zero one hundred plus? Who
am I mean? I've got the answers written right in
front of me. So uh, call diamond and win some
money with the Diamond songs backward sweepstakes sweepstakes. And I
(55:30):
love how you do you do these diamond fantastic? I
mean Gandhi, diamond's taking your calls for the diamond. It's
so confusing. Diamonds involved, way too many involved. Uh, let's
go around the room. Well we get someone to here.
Well we get our victim online or victim? Are you
looking at me? Dianna has our camera on me? Is
(55:50):
something coming here? No? I think we're playing the game.
It's okay here, excellent, Hi Dianna. All right, let's go
around the room. We'll start with you, Froggy. What's on
your mind today? So last night I had to I'm
doing the beta version of the new iOS sixteen that's
on the iPhone, and for some reason, it deleted all
my credit cards and it did the same thing on
my wife's phone. This morning, she wakes up. She goes to, so,
why did you delete all the credit cards on my phone?
(56:11):
You don't want me spending anywhere money? And like they
do it on purpose. So I'm like, I'll fix it
right now. She's like, no, why are you doing that
to me? Like, I swear I'm not trying to keep
from spending money. It's the phone. Had to prove to
her that they deleted them on my phone as well,
just as she thinks that I'm not like pulling some
fast moves so she'll go somewhere and trying to buy
something to day and can't. But it is very convenient.
(56:31):
Credit card information has been wiped from your phone, and
you could wipe it from yours as well, very easily.
I swear I didn't there. You know, it sounds like
something I would do, but I didn't do that. Gee
ah right, I'll produce. You're Sam, what's going on with you? Okay?
So if you live in a city, you're really familiar
with those people who stand on the corner and stop
you to try and get you to donate to a charity. Yeah, sorts.
(56:53):
I think those people are fantastic, except when they see
me holding a phone and I'm walking in the area
and they physically stop me. Though, that version of those
people will drive me nuts. What you're pretending to be
on a phone call? No, I'm really on a phone call. Yesterday,
guys stood in front of me and shook both his
hands and he goes, hi, can I talk to you
for a minute, and whispered because he knew I was
on the phone, And I'm like, no, bless you, but
I'm on the phone, and I kept walking. I wonder
(57:16):
sometimes how many of those are scams? Tell a lot
of them. I tell you why. They'll stop down and
they'll go, hey, this is great for the kids, you know,
and they're in the hospitals, and yeah, I tell you what.
Give me the information. I'll go online at home and
look it up and then I'll donate from there. Oh
oh no, because if you don't understand, you can donate
here right now with us. I said, I'll happily go
online at home. Just give a card. Can I put
(57:37):
it into my phone? And when they say no, then
I think there's something Miss Sally. They talked too fast too.
I said yes to them once. I signed up for
one year, and it's six years later. I'm still donating
to the calls, Hey, Danielle, what's up. So? I love
telling you when I find a book that I love,
because you know I love reading. So. Jeanette McCartney's I'm
Glad my Mom Died. I think I mentioned it before
(57:57):
it came out. She was in I Carle and Sam
and Kat with Ariana Grande and it is so so
crazy to look into her life and what her mom
actually did do to her. She was that stage mom
who the mom really wanted to be famous, not Jeanette
and everything that she did. And it's really interesting, you know,
(58:18):
when you first showed me that, I saw the title.
The title is I'm Glad my mom dies. I'm like,
it's yeah, what is this about? Go into it and
you'll see and then um also like she talks about
all her eating disorders and stuff. It's it's it's really
eye opening about what goes on behind the scenes. And
I'm sure she's not the only one that's gone through.
So check it out if you get a chance. It's
it's a great reading. It actually makes you look like
(58:39):
a good mom, it really does. It really makes me
look better than I thought. I was, Hey, scary, what's up.
I did the stupidest thing last night. I was trying
to meet up with Dandie for dinner and I figured, ah,
I want to take a bike there because they installed
a city bike rack, one of those public bike racks
in front of my building. Now the place I was
meeting over two it was two blocks away from my house. Really,
(58:59):
I got on the bike, well, yeah, because it's so
easy to unlock it with the apps. It's there, so
I jump on the bike, and I'm so excited. All
of a sudden, I go past the restaurant by two
and a half blocks because the bike rack tod deposit
the bike. The next bike rack was beyond the restaurant.
So it would have been faster just to walk, Yeah,
faster to walk to the restaurant. Instead, I walked a
longer distance because the next bike rack was beyond the restaurant.
(59:20):
But you know what you did. You know what you
did before you went inside and had buttery steaks. You exercised,
and you walked longer than you would have. Yeah, so
all is not long. I'll do it again. I was
so mad that he was off the bike before I
got there, because I wanted to record scary on a bike.
It doesn't happen. Hey, what's up, Gandhi? I want to
know how long do you wait for somebody to make
(59:41):
a decision when you're working on a project together before
you just abandon them and do it by yourself. What's
going on? Andrew and I are trying to get healthy,
so we're doing meal prepping together and we're working out together.
I've been asking him for how long would you say, Andrew?
A week? Two weeks to pick his meals for meal
preps a week in order together. This man still hasn't
picked it. He's going to get left in the US.
Am I wrong for that? No, not at all. My
(01:00:02):
favorite today was she said, hey, we can go work
out today. Andrew goes, yeah, my arms just not. I
just had heard this, Simon pinched me. I don't know
if I can do it. So I'm thinking Andrew may
have to get left behind on this project. That Andrew
use false troof false he picked his meals? All right? Well, no,
I think you owe it to yourself to move on.
(01:00:24):
Sometimes you gotta cut bait. Sure did you hear that?
Gotta cut bait? You're nothing but bait? Uh? Straight? Nait?
What's okay? Do yourself a favor and go take a
hike in nature. I mean, I basically live in wild Kingdom.
My house is on the edge of like a nature preserve.
And you know what I saw yesterday a black swallowtail butterfly. That.
(01:00:46):
Oh yeah, it was gorgeous and it was right there
in front of me. Never know those things exist. That
that's cool. Cool. If you hike through the streets of
Jersey City, you'll see those spotted lantern flies. Oh, and
you know people take such pride in taking their shoes
(01:01:08):
off and beating the crab bottom murder to the other day,
and he was so proud of himself. I know. But
you see, like people who look like great people turn
into vicious murders. Yes, and there I told you. They're
telling their kids like O kaiy it, go kill it.
These kids are like stomping a bug to death. Something
about it feels weird. I know we're supposed to. I
just find it weird to encourage the murder. Well, who
(01:01:28):
will the government asks us to kill next? You know
what I'm saying. I don't know. Do we have our
stuff back? It's now time for nothing? Nothing nothing, It's
now time. Okay, it's now time for diamond status music.
(01:01:48):
Backward game? Is that the name of it? Did Danielle
name it? These songs all sold over ten million copies
of piece, so they're all very pop. The thing is
is Gandhi Gandhi got high and made them all backward. Yes,
so you got to figure out what they are and
you could win cash. We're talking about ten dollars up
for grabs for each one you get, right, Hi Shannon, Hello, Hello,
(01:02:14):
So do you know your popular songs. I'd like to
think I do. I'm hoping I do. Always just screaming
at the radio when you guys are playing the last two.
So okay, so you know so by the way, to
fill you in. Shannon is a high school science teacher.
How fun is that? Cool? Yes? Yeah, in today's your
last day of summer school. Yes, it is. So. You know,
(01:02:36):
my friends and I were very excited. We get two
whole weeks of summer before we go back. Good for you.
You've worked hard. You deserve it, Shannon. You know we
love our teachers, so I would love for you to
win a lot of money. Here. All right, let's see
if we can do it. These songs all achieved diamond status,
meaning they sold over ten million copies a piece. They're
backward though, figure it out here song number one. Okay,
this is not working. It's going to be so funny.
(01:02:59):
Let's try. Okay, let's try to Okay, watch this. This
is gonna get really good. Toggle leave them all. Okay,
here we go and here's oh that's easy. What is it? Um?
I can play it one more time? Yes? If my
(01:03:23):
favorite songs of all time? What is it? What's that? Happy,
Yes it is, yeah, you goes. I'm happy. All right,
you got ten dollars and going right now? You're doing
very well. All right, let's keep going. Let's let's keep
getting them right here, Shannon song number two, Mmm, what
(01:04:01):
come on? You got this? I don't know that one?
You got one? What is it? Uh? That one? I
have absolutely no idea. It was a huge hip. But
maybe you won't remember this one. Did you like that
song when it was out? Once I found out what
it was about? Now, yeah, yeah, yeah yeah. They kind
(01:04:24):
of turned people off, but I tell you Shannon's you
you won ten, you lost in You're back at zero.
We got our ten dollars back? All right? Here? Song
Summer three, excellent song? What is it? Oh? That one? Um?
(01:04:48):
Is that? That's why? Grew? No more exact believe No,
that's closer Halsey and Chain Smokers back Seat of Your
ro I love that song? And uh oops, now you're
you're always ten dollars. This is kind of great. Let's
see your whole paycheck ten dollars stuff? All right? Here
(01:05:10):
is the next one? Yeah, you'll never get it? What
is it is that? Is that? Right? Oh? Is it?
Georgia line? Let's give it to her. Okay, Yeah, it's
(01:05:34):
a cruise line. You got it, you got it, Georgia line.
All right, So now you're back at zero. Fine, let's
move on to the next one. What is it? Scary machine?
It's gonna drive me to drink? All right, here's the
next one. So now you're at zero. Is I want
to say? Yes, she's a zero? All right? Here we
(01:05:54):
go dark ye can we play that? You got it?
(01:06:17):
If you're nice, probably you will have to play it
for you later. Okay, all right, so now you're up ten,
you're ten dollars up. You can do better. Come on, Shannon,
do better, as they say. I hate people say that.
All right, here we go your next song. What song
is this? It's sold ten million copies? Is that just
(01:06:43):
the where you are? Yes? It is nice Bruno mars. Wow,
you cracked twenty dollars, so there you go. All right,
let's keep all moving. I got more money in here. Okay,
(01:07:03):
hold on, now, who is that? That's a cheer shape
with the shape of magnetic Very nice. All right, so
now you're thirty, yeah, yeah, thirty dollars. Let's try another
one big song? That is we are Young it's fine.
(01:07:32):
Oh my god, you guys. Yeah, all right, Now you
character forty. You've got some momentum going here. This is fantastic.
Let's keep going. It's so weird to hear it backwards,
(01:07:57):
you know what it is? Forward from that one? That
one more time? Sorry, yeah, here we go. Sounds very creepy.
Oh is that Jason Mraz I'm yours? Yes it is.
(01:08:19):
You're really really good at this by the one. All right,
let's keep it. Where is she now? Good? God man,
you're loading up. Look now you're excited for the next one.
All right, Shannon, here's another one for you. What is it? Yes? Yeah,
(01:08:45):
I got it right there? What is it? Ah m hmm, No,
cool on that one? Oh? What is that song? Daniel Danielle?
I don't even know. I know it, but I don't
know the name of it. It's see you again? Like yo? Hello?
(01:09:08):
All right, so you lost ten now you're down to forty.
Keep going, we have a few more. Well, it took
him to superstardom. He sold over ten million copies of
that What is it? Here it again? Yes? All right?
(01:09:37):
What could that be? Yeah? Nope? At a blank? Oh
that would be called old Town Rob by Little NASAs.
Oh my god, seriously. Yes. Okay, so now we're down
to the very last one and you are at thirty Okay,
(01:10:00):
if thirty bucks in my bank account, no, no, you
have one morning now. If you get this right, I'll
double it up to sixty dollars. Okay, all right, let's go,
all right, here we go. Do it? Did you hear it?
(01:10:22):
You heard it? This is your favorite song, Nate. You
do you want to hear it again? Yeah, one more time.
You can hear it. Listen closely at the end. You
(01:10:42):
got it? What is it? Shannon? Oh no, that song
is by someone named Taylor Swift. It's called shake It Off.
It's okay, you know what. You hit twenty. I'm gonna
(01:11:05):
I'm gonna so well, I'll drive you up to fifty bucks. Okay,
nobody deal. Because you're a teacher. We love you, Shannon.
Thanks for listening. You did very well, by the way
you did. She did really well. Those were great GARDI
I love these games. All right, Hold one second, Shannon,
have a great day to day at school. Enjoy your summer.
(01:11:27):
Thank you. You're so welcome. Anyway, what are we listening to?
The Star? The Star Wars cantina. Let me go into
the let's play that. It sounds like it's playing backwards. Scary.
I love this scene of the movie. Do you guys
see Scary dancing to this song over here? I think
it was fist pumping. Look his weird song to Fi Pump.
(01:11:49):
He's wiggling his belly. All right, very nice. Let's roll
into the three things we need to know from Gandhi.
I do believe Jimmy Fallon's on the way. When's it
gonna be on with us in one? All right? Until then?
What's going on? Gandhi? President Biden is set to sign
the Inflation Reduction Act into law today. It was pushed
through the House last week, just days after it narrowly
passed the Senate. A White House statement and said the
(01:12:11):
measure will lower prescription drug prices in addition to fighting
climate change and reducing the deficit. Officials are recalling more
than two million baby swings and rockers following the death
of a ten month old. The Four Moms rock Aroo
Rockers and the Mamaroo Baby Swings are included in the alert,
so pay attention if you have those. The US Consumer
Product Safety Commission says infants can get caught in the
(01:12:33):
restraining strap and strangled if they're not used. If they're
not in use. The items were sold at Target and
Buy Buy Baby stores nationwide. And finally, we always see
these surveys, where are the best states to live? Any idea?
What the most recent answers were. I read it in Massachusetts?
Is that what they said? No, it's right here, New York,
New Jersey. I feel like they never come in at
(01:12:54):
the top. We are never at the top of what
makes us the best? We're curious. Thank you for asking
wallet hubb you. It's a lot of indicators to rank,
including education, job opportunities, safety, weather and cost of living.
Safety and weather and cost of living. Astound me if
you say it was here, yes, but they say New
Jersey came in second, New York came in third. Those
(01:13:15):
are at the top. Which number one? Are you ready
for this? Oh? No, you were right. I thought it
said Mississippi, but it was Massachusetts. They have lots of
ms and messages. Yeah, it's Massachusetts, Mississippi. Actually, King Maks Massachusetts.
So great, all of those things, job opportunities, costs of living, education,
so good, Massachusetts, I guess, And we're right there behind them. Well,
thank you God, you appreciate it. I've listened to you
(01:13:37):
guys literally since I'm six years old. Wow, this is
the best day of my life. Mister ran in the
Morning Showscuri Joe. It's the good neighbors at State Farm.
Believe you don't have to give up what you love
for great insurance for surprisingly great rates like a good
neighbor State Farm, is there call or go to State
farm dot com to get a quote today? Las ran
(01:14:00):
in the Morning Show not to get into sound with Garrett. Also,
I saw a text a little while ago from Emerson.
I wanted to talk to her. Is she there? Is
that you? Emerson? Hello? Good morning. Now. I read what
you wrote and I was like, oh God, I'm so
happy for her, but I want to I want to
know ward. Her text said, I am starting my first
(01:14:21):
big girl job today. Now what does that mean? I mean?
First of all, how how old are you? If I'm
to ask, I'm twenty two? Okay, all right, so this
is your first What does it mean by big girl job? In?
What's your definition? What are you talking about? So? So,
for the past four years, I have been working just
in a childcare center while I was getting my undergraduate
(01:14:43):
and kind of you know, minimum wage, just kind of
getting my way through college. So once I graduated, this
was my first you know, like it's not salary, but
it's a big pay bump and just feels a little
bit more professional. So that's why I call it my
first big girl job because I feel like a big girl. Well, so,
(01:15:03):
how does how does it make you feel? Is it fright?
Is it excitement? Is it u? What is it? What
is it you're feeling? I'm terrified, but I can't believe
I'm talking to you guys, and I'm probably going to
get lost. But it's fine. Well wait, don't don't get
lost on the way to you don't get lost on
the way to your new big girl job. Okay, it's okay, Um,
(01:15:26):
all right, So okay, so start over. You're terrified, Yeah,
but I'm really excited because the company it seems like
it's a newer company and they're all really young, and
they make me feel very comfortable and it just seems
like a really great place to work. And I you know,
I'm just training this week, so I'm not working with
any kiddos, but I'm really excited to get my clients
(01:15:49):
and actually get into the field and start using my schooling. Nice.
Good for you, you know what, God, think back, you know,
we've been all working for a while. Here. I think
back to that first time you got a job. You're like,
wait a minute, this is different. This is a lot
different than the last job. It's weird. It's it's weird,
but it's you say, terrified, and you know, terrified excitement
(01:16:09):
they're the same thing sometimes, right, Yeah, really, yeah, I
think it's awesome. Yeah, you know what, so exciting. Never
forget this feeling, because this feeling, you know, if you
go in every day for the next couple of years,
they're gonna there are going to be days where you're like,
oh god, today it really sucked. But and you gotta
remind yourself, Okay, I am excited about this. I'm going
to have those days. Yeah, but yeah, you'd be good.
(01:16:31):
Oh my god, you guys have made it like I
was excited for today. But I have been listening to
you guys like so at my old job, I would
have to get there at six fifteen, and when you
guys changed the horoscope time, I was so upset because
I couldn't hear my horoscope before working the morning. That's
just awful. This makes up for it like a million
(01:16:53):
Oh my gosh. And we post the horoscopes every day
if you miss it. Yeah yeah, oh yeah. I anyways, sorry,
very real, very very real. I just saw another text.
It says I just left a job making more money
than ever have before I was miserable. Money is not everything.
(01:17:15):
I mean, sure it, let's be real. It's important, but
it's not everything. So yeah, you know, and more and
more people in the in the workforce these days are
saying that same thing. More than ever. People are understanding
the importance of being happy, over the importance of like
getting that dollar in that bank. You know, your mental
health is so important. It is. Hey Emerson, I remember
these moments and keep in mind you worked for this.
(01:17:36):
You've worked hard for this. It's all you. You may
have people who you looked up to, who I gave
you advice, but you did it all. You are the
propulsion behind your moving to a new job. Congratulations, Thank
you so much. Els, have a great day. Okay you
two Bye bye, guys. God, I can't wait for my
next job. You have a big girl job right now. Yeah,
(01:17:59):
you do a big girl job. What's scary? I have
a question. I see so many people quitting, But then
I'm wondering, like, well, dude, if they don't have a
long term plan, like are they scared of they worried?
Like what's next? Girl? Different? So many people are just like,
you know, I'm just gonna play it by ear And
I don't know if I was taught me personally. No,
(01:18:21):
if you have to have a plan, you always have
to have a backup, and you always have to be
thinking about thinking forward. But people just walk out and
they say, oh, Okay, I'm just gonna hang out by
a pool, I'll go travel. Well, you know what gosh
to be able to do that? That would be nice. Yeah, Frog,
what's up? Over the last few years, I knew a
couple of people who were out of their job for
whatever reason it was, and they've all have found their
(01:18:44):
own thing. They've all told me they're making more money
than they were making before. They're doing so much better,
they're happier. Things are great. Like I feel like when
the world kind of gives you a push that maybe
you wouldn't have pushed yourself, sometimes it ends up being
so much better off for you. In the long run.
It's hard to see that right when it happens, but
looking back, generally that is the case, and hopefully that
happens for everybody. Well that's our prayer. Sometimes you need
(01:19:07):
a swift, swift kick in the ass to get your thought. Yeah,
I need one of those right now. Bend over? Um,
what else was I reading before we get into sound? Oh?
I wanted to talk about this. A sex pert shares
how to tell if someone will be good and bad?
(01:19:28):
Are we curious? Yea? A sex expert. Her name is
Annabelle Knight. Here her top Here are her top tips
for spotting a bad lover based on body language and
how they act on it. Use the word lover. Can
we start there? Number one? A speed eater. That's a
(01:19:49):
sign of a bad lover. By the way, is it
we could just this week? Move on there? Let me
tell you what speed the speed eaters? So you look,
you know someone who's a speed eater? She says, if
(01:20:11):
they're rushing through things that should be enjoyed, like food,
they're more likely to rush through intimacy and that's not
a good sign. Okay, do you agree with that? No?
You like a speed eater? No? Not necessarily. Why don't
you explain yourself gunning? So I will just use my
boyfriend as an example. He will house his food in
two minutes. He was a military guy for a very
(01:20:33):
long time. They have eight minutes to finish their meals.
He's used to doing that. I don't think all military
guys are bad in the sack. I know for sure.
One that's not okay. He may have a different reason
for eating fast. Yeah, his meal? What's that scary? There
is no correlation? Okay, there, you know. Look, but do
you do you agree Daniel that someone who understands how
(01:20:56):
to enjoy food and take your time with it and
not just through it just to get full, maybe they'll
be the same when it comes time to you know, yeah,
I think they Maybe they take their time with everything
and want to enjoy it a little bit more. Because
your tongue has different taste parts of it, right, like this,
A different parts of your tongue tastes different things, yea tongue. Well,
(01:21:17):
I mean, look, you know, like I'm gonna use Alex
as an example. Okay, I'll spend like four hours making dinner,
He'll sit down, It'll be gone in fifteen seconds, right,
I'm like, well, you've got to taste that inhal it.
So we don't agree with this first one, Okay, you
I want you to think what you want to think.
(01:21:38):
I'm just throwing this out here from this person's perspective. Okay,
I'm not saying anyone's wrong or right. Okay, all right.
Number two, on the story sexpert sharing how to tell
if someone would be good in bed a fast mover.
Once again, she says that the idea of taking things
slow seems like a foreign concept of some people. It
could be they lack emotional experience and say may not
(01:22:00):
be satisfying. They would just roll up to the end, Okay,
they want to get to the big Oh, they don't
enjoy the journey exactly, the destination exactly. So do we
all agree that journey can be just as fun as
the Oh sure, yeah. Maybe another sign of someone being
a bad lover the bedroom bragger, Oh for sure. Yeah.
(01:22:25):
They talk about past they talk about past conquests, how
great they are a bad or how many people they've
slept with. That could be a sign of insecurity or
dead giveaway that someone isn't that great event. Yes, that's
very little d energy. I've heard. Those who can do
those who can't talk about it. Yeah, that's how I right.
Another thing that could be the sign of a bad
lover a big boozer. Oh oh, couple drinks is one thing,
(01:22:48):
but if they drink way too much, it can negatively
affect their performance. Yeah. The whiskey thing. Yeah, whiskey D.
Have you ever had whiskey D's gary? I think we've
woll been there? Yeah, me for sure. It happens all
the time. You ever whiskey d? Oh, my god, all
the time. Not to be confused with sunny D. I
don't know what that is. Also, they say another sign
(01:23:10):
of a bad lover a couch potato. If you can
barely get him off the sofa, they may not have
much stamin In the bedroom, you can be very disappointed.
According to this sex wort. Now, let me give you
some things that tell you they're good in bed. Someone
likes to chat. If they show caring and understanding when
talking to you, chances are they'll want to understand what
(01:23:32):
works for you in bed. Okay, I'm not afraid to
ask questions that makes sense. I can see that are
we really ringing a bell? That is important? I feel
like scary's ringing the bell to show you that that's
what he does. You are a chatty chap next on
the list. If you can tell someone's good in bed,
maybe they have very very meaningful eye contact. Oh ah, okay.
(01:23:56):
And it's a proven scientific fact that maintaining good eye
contact can trigger the release of feel good chemicals like
uh oxytocin, the love hormone. As you know. It also
shows they're not afraid of emotional intimate intimacy. So you
could be in luck. Yeah. You know a lot of
people are afraid to make eye contact because they just
can't connect one on one like I'm doing with you
(01:24:18):
right now, Danielle, look at me in the ad. Also
someone else who could be a good in bed. They're funny.
Oh yeah, I think that's the key. Pete Davidson. I'm
telling you, guys, there's something about Pete. The ladies love them.
Does he know how to mow the yard? I think
he does. He's also got a big one I haven't seen.
I've heard maybe it does, but it doesn't. We all
(01:24:40):
agree that having a good sense of humor is a
key factor to being good in bed. So if your
date likes to laugh, it's a good sign. I've ever
been in bed with someone You're like, you really want
to like have a great time. Then all of a
sudden someone farts. Either you roll out of bed and
run out of the room like ready to vomit, or
you go, oh, let's move on kidding me right now?
(01:25:08):
Essential humor lacking. And finally, maybe a good sign that
they're good in bed is they have great kissing intuition. Yes,
they maybe don't need rehearsal or directions. You can tell
by the way they kiss that they know how to
slow it down, be a good kisser. Chances are they'll
(01:25:28):
also know what they're doing it. But now, these are
not guaranteed payoffs, But according to this expert, those there
are the things to look for it to see if
they're bad or good in bed. You agree with some
of them, Yeah, some of them, Yeah I do. What
was the first one you didn't like? Speed eater? Speed eater? Yeah,
not going to agree with that. Speed eater. Not counting
out our military guys. Scary when you're at the restaurant,
(01:25:52):
When you're at the restaurant, speed eating. No no no, no, no,
no no no no. Did he sound like that last
night at Ruth's Chris staycount kind of. There was a
lot of he was enjoying the surf and the term
do we know you do? Get into your food? This
(01:26:13):
music is so stupid. If you come over, if if
you come home to me after a day at work
and I turned this music on. I'm lighting some candles
and dimming the lights. I'm wearing a nice agent provocat
or teddy. I serve you up at Martini. Put your
(01:26:34):
slippers on. Maybe light your pipe for you like that.
You know it's gonna be quite delight. It probably was
when you saw me in my teddy with feathers. All right,
there you go, my pipe, Duran, light my pipe, Light
(01:26:55):
your pipe. Let's get into sound with Garrett. Hey, Garrett,
what do you have? I'm gonna do this whole report
by looking you in the eye. Okay, correct, Let's talk
about the bachel Bachelor right last night, So Gaby sent
home one of the guys that she liked. But it
was one of those crying breakups where she couldn't speak
because she was crying. So oh, couldn't get harder? Could
(01:27:16):
I never want to say goodbye? Two different places? She's upset.
I was I was in one of those breakups in
high school. I was like, did we just break up?
Because I couldn't I couldn't hear over the crying. It
was just so I don't know. And she ended up
(01:27:37):
going sending Nate home. So I just like the fact
that ny got sent home. Yeah, let's go to Kansas City.
So this pastor is upset with his congregation that they
have not bought him a watch. What he wants a watch?
So he's like shaking down his congregation for a time piece.
And he let him know that while he was on
the altar. I'm not worth your McDonald's money, I y'all, Louisa, Tom,
(01:28:02):
I ain't worth your broduc. I'm not worth your Gucci.
I'm saying because I want you to understand just what
God is saying. You can buy a Mavato watching Sam,
And y'all know, I asked the one last year. Here
it is the whole way in August. I still ain't
got it. Y'all ain't saying nothing. Let me kick down
the door and talk to my chief sons and daughters.
(01:28:22):
Oh my God, you buy it. I do think God
is telling them to buy him a watch. Get him off,
they all tar get out of here. It's like the
same pastor that flies private with the private jets rights
avado different. All right? What it SAMs? All right? Here's
a momnd that's right, Yeah, she ain't going to buy
(01:28:44):
one though. All right? This mom trying to teach your
daughter to say mama and the same mom Mom? Can
you say mom? Is name? No? Simple? No? Moving on?
All right? This is from TikTok, a bartender talking about
the code word to use when you're at a bar
(01:29:05):
and you feel like you're in trouble, and an angel
shot is a way for asking for help from a bartender,
a balance, or a manager someone had a restaurant without
directly saying it, The benefit being talking in code to
avoid the situation from getting any worse. What if the
person you're with those when angel shot is and they're
like standing right of your shoulder and you just still
don't feel comfortable saying it. You can ask your bartender
if angela is working. But I have seen situations where
even this isn't good enough. Get this close to an
authority figure or somebody who's working at the location as possible,
(01:29:27):
whisper or yell at if you have to shorter words,
if possible, get your point across to make sure that
they know that you need help. And this is the
most important part right here. This can be used by anybody,
not just women. At the end of the day, we
need to make sure that you're safe. Okay, Well, he
talks way too fast, but that's TikTok it is. We
had this discussion a long time ago, remember, And what
was the word that we had heard about from bartender?
(01:29:48):
They talked about the angel shot? If you order an
angel shot, okay, and then also writing a note if
Sometimes the bartender will write you a note if they
think that you're uncomfortable, right, And they said, ask for angela?
Is angela working? Right? If there's an Angela there? And
what if the bartender doesn't listen to our shows? Hi?
Is angela working? I'm sorry there's no angel Well, but
(01:30:09):
may I have an angel shot? I'm sorry? What's that?
This guy's creeping on me exactly? Angela is not working
all right? So a grandson decided to give his grandma
a Roman candle to hold and then light it and
listen to her reaction keep holding. They were like that,
oh oh, whoa, whoa that's awful. Just go grandma, hold this.
(01:30:49):
It sounds like Nate chopping up in his victim. Yes,
all right, and then there's a Nate chopping her. Keep holding.
They were like that, Oh okay, all right. Then finally,
so if you're if you're in Vegas over the weekend,
you might have seen this. There's a barbershop, which is
kind of just a place where people it's a cover band.
(01:31:10):
So a bunch of cover bands play and sing along,
cover bench play. It's barbershop. Yes, exactly. So Silk Sonic
took the stage Bruno Mars Anderson pack and they did
a bunch of covers themselves. Oh my god, Oh my god.
(01:31:35):
Really yeah. So if I'm gonna get my haircut, they
don't do this. And then Rock said, can you imagine
getting your haircut? The barbershop is just like a bar.
It's like a bar. It's just a bar. So they
call it the barbershop. Oh well, that's a whole different thing.
(01:31:59):
Did you guys think it's very disappointed? Didn't you guys
think it was a barbershop? I did, and I was like, well,
the acoustics of this plays are incredible. It's called the barbershop.
You shouldn't have told me the truth. You should have
left it that way. That's right, al Elvis, it's a
barbershop out there, and all right, you're a good American, Garrett.
Sometimes you need a lie. Daniel's coming up next. What
(01:32:20):
do you have, Danielle. We're gonna talk about Ben and
Jen celebrating and Nipsey Hustle getting his Hollywood Walk of
Fame star. Sent a text, sent us a text. Men
with larger noses have larger hoses applied. Oh my god,
look at all the text Delstrand in the Morning show.
(01:32:43):
We all love a good laugh, but there is nothing
funny about. Why is that? Why is that? That's me?
Let me handle this one. You know, we all love
a good laugh. I didn't know what it was for.
I'm gonna talk about Hello Fresh, Look at that window.
What do you see, sunshine? You really feel like going
to the grocery store and going up and down every
single aisle to five? Absolutely not. Sometimes it can be fun,
(01:33:06):
but let Hollo Fresh do if they do the heavy lifting.
You order from fifty over fifty recipes every single week,
and now it's summertime. It's the summertime. Recipes. You don't
have to use the stove or the oven as much.
It's all that fresh ingredient stuff that we get from
the farm to your house. Our box is coming this way.
You have a box on the way anyway. Cut back
(01:33:26):
on your trips to the grocery store. Have more fun
during your summer with quick breakfasts and lunches and snacks
from the Hollo Fresh market falls around the corner. It's
all going to change for that because there's chefs are
just brilliant when it comes to coming up with Hello
Fresh recipes. Get started today at Hello Fresh dot com
slash Elvis for sixteen free meals. That's a lot across
(01:33:47):
seven boxes. It's free gifts and sixteen free meals. Do
it at the very least. Go to their website and
check them out. It's so cool. We love Hollo Fresh.
Hello Fresh dot com slash Elvis. What's says your box
appearing today or tomorrow? Morrow? Tomorrow? Let me know, let
me know, Yeah again, Helo Fresh dot com slash Elvis.
(01:34:07):
In the morning show, is it boogie to have a
weekend bag? No, No, I gotta say, before you said it,
I didn't even know what a weekend bag was Well,
it's it's like you can get a nice leather bag
or a canvas when and it's just big enough for
like a few things for the weekend. You don't have
(01:34:29):
like a big bag on rollers or crap, like not
a weekend ho back. That's what I thought you meant
that birth Okay, Well it's like a big fancy duffle. Yeah,
it's just like a big duffle. Okay, because the thought,
the thought of just hopping in the car and driving
away for a Friday Saturday night and coming home sounds great.
They're called weekend ors weekend bag, right, Yeah, so I
(01:34:51):
see them when I like them, not buy them. I
have like a closet full of weekend bags, but I
never go anywhere on the weekend. I love that you
have a closet full. Well okay, it's like that's boozy.
Maybe okay, two or three I'm collected over the years.
So the thing is is, uh, I like, don't you
like that concept of what are you doing? We're gonna
drive out to the We're gonna go to a nice
bed and breakfast. Yeah, we do that. We do that
(01:35:13):
all the time. Like if we have a soccer free
weekend or soccer in a certain area and then we
have like the next day free, we will find something
to do in that area and just throw a bag
in the car and go. I love it. Do you
have purchases in your midst that you you buy them
because at the time it seems like this is kind
of where I want my life to go, but you
never use them. Yeah. Remember your organization day when we
(01:35:37):
talk you to Staples and you bought so many things
to organize your life, and you said how long hours
we went up and on every because I'm like, this
is the day I'm going to organize my life. Daniel,
come with me, and guess what happened? He never took
him out of the bad in the closet with this
weekend or the other in my weekend. BA. Also, um,
my other thing is like dishes. If I see dishes,
(01:35:58):
I really like, oh, I'm gonna have a dinner party.
I need some serving spoons because you know what, what
if I had a buffet and you know I need
like plates and things. Never haven't never do it. They
just sit around. So the thing is we have to
learn this about myself and maybe you can think it
through and you will think of something that you buy
or consider buying because you want that lifestyle you've seen
(01:36:20):
it on TV or whatever. What a waste? I mean,
you buy these things and hopes that that's where your
life is going to go, and it doesn't. I never organized. Yeah,
I never went to the cape for lobster or whatever
one does back. So you know, you get to a
point in your life where I am definitely where it's
time to start shedding yourself of all these things. You know, Yeah, absolutely.
(01:36:43):
I told you I'm trying to make my one bedroom
apartment into a two bedroom apartment. So I had a
guy come over to look through and kind of do
organization things. He looked at all of my hair tools
and he said, how many of those do you actually use? Hey, yeah,
you don't usolve those. I see you all the time.
You don't use that. I've never seen your hair look
like that. I was like, hey, hey, stay out of
my life. You're right, I have to get rid of things,
but why? But what is it about them that makes
(01:37:05):
you hoard them? So for me, I feel terrible throwing
things away. So in my head, I say I'm going
to sell this or I'm going to give it to
somebody who needs it, and then I never do either
of those things, and it just sits in my bathroom
collecting dust. And my guy yells at me, right, yeah,
but he has a point. He is a great point.
Because I looked at it. I said, you're right, I
don't use that crimper ever. Well, scary, what's in your
(01:37:27):
trunk right now? A Yetti cooler and two Tommy Bahama
beach chairs. Never used us, but you want that the
fantasy of going to the beach with your Yetti cooler
and your two Tommy Bahamma beach chairs trunk. Yeah, I
did that with camping gear. We bought all this camping gear.
We have camping camping, I think woods a camping still seal.
(01:37:50):
The problem is Lisa made me buy her an umbrella
like screws into the ground, because we see so many
umbrellas go flying down the beach once the wind blows them.
Have you screwed that into the ground yet? Not one time?
There you go, all right, think it through. It's time
to shed these things out of our lives. We have
a few minutes for you, Danielle, and we have Jimmy
Fallon On in a few minutes I love Jimmy Fallon.
All right, you're up. All right. We all know the
(01:38:10):
pay gap between men and women actors is very weak,
very real. So Bryce Dallas Howard, who you know from
Jurassic Park and Jurassic World and all that she was
supposed to have been paid two million dollars less than
Chris Pratt for the second Jurassic Park movie. She's saying
that that number is actually low, and Pratt couldn't do
much about the original deal. But how cool is this?
(01:38:32):
He wanted to make sure that she got paid the
same so he went into battle for her and made
sure that all those projects like video games and amusement
park rides and stuff like that they got paid the
same amount. He's a nice guy, that Chrismas see Nate,
you got a crush on Chris Pratt. Sounds like a
nice guy, doesn't name. There you go, Ben Affleck and
Jennifer Lopez celebrating their wedding this weekend, big ass party.
(01:38:53):
I told you guys that they were going to do this.
I don't know who's coming to the party, but it's
gonna be huge and it's gonna be at his home
in Georgia. Nipsey Hustle would have been thirty seven. Yesterday
got the star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame. So
August fifteenth will now be known as Nipsey Hustle Day
in Los Angeles where she's, like I said, is also
his birthday. Mister Bays has her path one hundred million
(01:39:14):
subscribers on Your Love Mister Beach because he's so nice
and he will just walk up to someone and gave
them like one hundred thousand dollars. He's awesome. But by
the way, he's close to Beauty Pies one hundred and
eleven million subscribers, so they have this friendly rivalry going.
I follow both of them. So yeah, you know the
new trailer for She Hulk Attorney at Law. It came
(01:39:35):
out because we're getting it this Thursday on Disney Plus
a lot of people can't wait for that. I don't
know if you want to watch it. Adele did an
interview with Elle magazine. She's talking about why she canceled
that Las Vegas residency. She said it was devastating to
disappoint the fans, but she felt like there was no
soul in the show, that she was just disconnected and
it lacked intimacy. She then said she was so embarrassed
(01:39:58):
she went into hiding. She even created a fake Twitter
accounsel she could get the scoop on what fans were saying,
but then it was so negative that she kind of
deleted it. In the end, she said it didn't give
her confidence when she canceled, because she said it made
her stand for her artistic needs and what she believed in.
So there you go. Ah and Rolling Loud has just
added Playboy Cardi to the lineup. Is the three Day
(01:40:21):
Music Festival September twenty third to twenty fifth in City Field.
The lineup, I don't know if you've seen the lineup.
It's insane. It's gonna be great. And that's it. That's
my Danielle, Love you, Danielle. Jimmy fallon for you coming
up next year. We've also got a good friend of
ours telling us Durant in the Morning's Elvis Durand in
(01:40:46):
the Morning Show. Two hundred years before Game of Thrones,
Targarians ruled West Rose with an army of dragons. The
only thing that could tear down the House of the
Dragon was itself. Don't miss the new HBO original series
House of the Dragon premiere this Sunday at nine pm
on HBO Max. And some of my favorite moments have
been the moments where Jimmy Fallon has joined us and
(01:41:06):
here he is, So time for another favorite moment. Hi, Jimmy,
good morning, good morning, good morning. I'm so happy to
be with you guys. Y'all look good. I miss you, guys.
I would come on every single day if you'd let me.
Let you. Yeah, we will let you. Before we get
going to talk about before we talk about Password, my
favorite game show of all time when I was a kid,
(01:41:28):
Alan Ludden always the best host. That's how we met
Betty White, that's how they got married, exactly. But Kiki Palmer,
who I adore, is now the official host. And of course, Jimmy,
you're on Password? Is it every single game? Yeah, I'm
the permanent player. Yeah, so I'm the new, the new
Betty White. I've often thought of you as the permanent player. Yeah.
I'm bringing back Golden Girls next next year. You know
(01:41:52):
Betty Kim on the show we played, she's such a
great Password player. She's like the she's she's the goat,
and so we we had her on the show. He said,
do you mind playing password? Like She's like, oh yeah,
Like you know, she thought of her husband of Alan Ludden,
and so we played and it was so fun. She
used a pro and then we just kept playing it.
And then someone who owns password said, Hey, by the way,
(01:42:14):
we own password. I know you're doing it on the
Tonight show, but if you ever want to bring it back,
it ran for sixteen years or something crazy yep, and
I go, let's do it. So we kind of been
working on bringing it back. And then someone had the
idea of Kiki Palmer hosting as opposed to me hosting,
which I'm like, I host enough stuff. I'd love to
just play. So I'm the permanent player, so I play
(01:42:35):
with contestants, try to raise them money. It's it's a
simple game. You give a clue, you try to guess
the word. One word clues, one word guesses, and you
win twenty five grand Hey so um, other than Password,
So I know you're an old school TV junkie like me.
What other game shows it would be fun to bring
back from the dead? I mean just other some other
(01:42:57):
people have done them to a few, you know. When
I was thinking in the studio where we were shooting
in La was at stage thirty seven. They did Hollywood
Squares there. Hollywood Squirrel would be fine, Yeah you would,
you would? You always be the central square they usually
I have. I have like a flamboyant gay guy in
the middle, Paul Lynn's greatest. You know what? Have I
(01:43:21):
showed you my Charles Nelson Riley imitation home? Oh Charles
doesn't right. It would be Charles Riley or Paul Lynde
or so yeah, Charles Doeston. Raley was fantastic, but you
know we'rely. My first sketch I ever did ever on
Center A Live was Hollywood Squares Sketch. Camera Diaz was
the host, and the idea was they're playing Hollywood Squares,
(01:43:43):
but there was an earthquake in LA and all the
squares crumbled, but they kept playing the game. So there's
blood everywhere the smoke, and I'm playing Gilbert Godfried and
they're like, I'm gonna I'm gonna take Gilbert Godfrey the
block and I'm covered in blood, am holding my entire
testinal track in my own hand. That was my first
(01:44:09):
line I ever did on Sarah Live. And it's just
so funny. I was in the studio where they made
Hollywood Squares awesome. You know, what's one of the great
things about working at NBC here in New York is
that you can still smell the history up in now
those hallways. I remember when I was doing some work
on the Today Show. You can smell the old dusty tubes,
you know what I mean. I mean it's Dusty two.
(01:44:31):
We have, you know, we have you know, our hallway
is used to have MSNBC on our hallway. We used
to have you know, Sarah Live is above us Today's
shows downstairs. So during a weird week we would have
like someone walking a camel down the hall, right, then
we would have someone dressed as showgirls from Vegas and
(01:44:51):
from our show, and then we'd have the real Bill
Clinton walking to an interview, right. And it's not like
what a weird hallway it is. But that's the nature
of old school network TV. You know, it still kind
of holds onto that, didn't You guys do some excavation
in the hallways at NBC and find some really old
some relics from like years pass from the radio jow.
We found these old pipes. I knew about these pipes
(01:45:14):
that Jim Henson and Frank Oz were waiting to go
on the Jack par Show, and they were waiting to
go on. They had nothing to do, and they open
up this closet and had a bunch of pipes and
they're like, you know, water pipes or whatever and drain pipes,
and they painted them and they put eyeballs on them
and fur on them, and they put with love the Muppets.
So they were always called the Muppet pipes. And we've
(01:45:34):
always heard that they were there. And I remember when
Conan O'Brien had his show. I remember it was in
Max Winbery's dressing room. So I would go to Max's
dressing room. I had knocked on his door like and
he like, uh yeah, I go he Maxes Jimmy found
him here with my mom and dad. He's like, huh,
I go, can I show them the Muppet pipes? Come
on Andy d then like a show. So when I
(01:45:58):
get this guy a job, so uh when I took
over late night, I had that wall knocked down and
that put behind glass. So it's part of the NBC tourner.
You can see them Muppet pipes. And we showed it
to Frank Oz. We had him on the show and
we showed it to him and he started crying, like
he got teared up in that wild You know, it's
just so many memories in there. I tell you, you know,
when you years old, when you do the Tonight Show
(01:46:20):
starring Jimmy Fallon, the dressing rooms in the back are
the coolest you've You've had me in the Ski shelle
a couple of times, and yeah, that's the my favorite one.
It's a lot of fun. I mean just being even
if I was asked to be a guest and then
canceled because we because whoever took too much time, I'd
be totally fine because you get the free blanket he
give you give get back. There was it. Yeah, well
(01:46:44):
we know it as we we designed those rooms because
I remember doing Letterman and those dressing rooms were like
you're in a hospital right in the icee. You. I mean,
it's really you get like a piece of playful of
jello and it is, uh you go wow, am I.
It's just so frightening. So we're gonna doing it. Let's
make it fun. So one is like a ski shalet.
Room One is all stars, everywhere you feel you're in space.
(01:47:09):
The music room has every instrument. We could think of
hanging up on the walls in case of band, what's
the jam out? And we've had everybody jamming out like Coldplay,
We've had the Beach Boys. We had the Beach Boys
were there and they were jamming out and want to
say hi to Brian Wilson and they're playing whatever, and
it came in. I go, hey, guys, just want to
say thanks for having for being on the show and
have fun. And Brian Wilson goes, yeah, we're kind of
(01:47:30):
in the middle of rehearsal right now, oh and crew
me out. All right, well thanks for stopping by, So
I mean got thrown out of your own show. So
just no, if you're watching a show like The Tonight
Show and it's a really fun, fun show, you see
between the commercials, it's just as much fun, or sometimes
(01:47:50):
more fun. Back to dude, it early sets. It sets
the table. All right, let's talk about password tonight NBC.
Of course Keith Palmer is hosting, but Jimmy will be
right there on the on the panel. If we're gonna
play this, it's not gonna be in the same We
can't do it the same way because you have here's
what I can do? I can do you want to
play with me? Or I can play with you? Well?
(01:48:12):
What do we take it? We could take turns. Jimmy,
all right, let me play with you first, you take
leave your ears. Well, hold on, I will tell everyone
what the password, but hold on, hold on, which we
don't have the password? Theme. We have newlywed games and
we have card sharks. Unbelievable, neither of them. Let's do.
Let's do card sharks, card sharks. A little sensoripher kicks in.
(01:48:44):
Now it's trying for password. Here we go. All right,
Now I'm gonna take my headphones off. Yeah, and so
you're gonna do the word. And then everyone just takes
turns trying to get me to guess it. Is that
how we're gonna do it? Yes, but I think we
will be pretty good. I think you'll get Okay, okay,
my piled down. Try one word? Alright, your headphones are off,
not listening, plug your ears alright ready, everyone went to
(01:49:06):
do it. In my creepiest voice, the password is do
we have it? No? Or orange? Okay? Okay, we got it,
all right. I was in the sound proof booth. Okay, Elvis,
are you ready I'm gonna give you the clue and
you give me the password. Okay, do we have a
time read? What are we doing? No? This is it?
This is the freedom of the of the show password. Okay,
(01:49:27):
that's happened. Ready, okay, So if I don't get it
from your clue, then others have to try a one
word clue until I get okay, okay, okay, okay, all right,
ready m hm juice, grape color orange? Do you say great?
You say grape, You say grape? Now whose turn is it? Now? Oh?
(01:49:49):
I said, I said color and I said orange. No
but no, but no, so go through the rules. How
does this? Why are you saying anything? I thought we
gave him another clue once he didn't get it from
your clue? Yeah, but how fast you have playing speed? Password?
(01:50:11):
All right? Okay, okay, so should we choose another word?
The password was let me take okay, so if you
want to do anything, okay, guys, ready for this. Froggy,
ready for this, Froggy, won't you get the clue on
this one? Okay? Okay? The password is popcorn? Okay, okay, yea,
(01:50:35):
before we do tell him what to do, Froggy is
doing it. I'm not doing it. Froggy is giving you
one word clue and you have to one word guess. Okay, okay, okay, focus,
let's focus on buttered toast. Okay, so okay, I said
(01:50:56):
toast obviously not right? Now, what happens? This is? This
is a dress rehearsal for night. What comes this? Jimmy? Alright,
now I will give these second clues? Okay, okay, so buttered? Okay,
less anyone else wants to play Danielle? Yeah, okay, one
word Danielle movie popcorn. Yeah, but it wasn't bad. That
(01:51:23):
was good. Okay, we have just a few sec I
love he's defending himself. That wasn't bad. Okay, okay. Now now, Jimmy,
you have to you have to count to five, and
you have to mute your speakers and let me give
them the password. Are you ready? Alright? Ready? Thumbs up?
(01:51:44):
The password is cow Bell? Okay, okay, okay, all right, okay,
have it ready? All right? All right, all right, all
right here we go. Ready, okay, okay, who wants to
give them back? Okay, I gave the password? Uh gandhi,
oh okay, let's do this. Okay, this is tough first,
come on, partner, we got this instrument? Oh, I know
(01:52:07):
that was terrible. Any instrument? Can I change mine? No instrument? Guitar? Okay?
Scary more? How bad? That was? Good? Right? That's the
(01:52:45):
other fun thing and the thing of the thing like
you can certain things you can kind of get away with.
So if you go like like ah, you know more
because that's not how scary would normally talk. But you
cannot say cow nor you say el. Okay. So tonight
I want everyone to watch the fun NBC's Password. It's
on after America's Got Talent. It is fun, family good times.
(01:53:08):
It's college kids are making it a drinking game, but
it is really a good time to night. Who All's
on tonight, Ki's hosting You're There nine, and tomorrow we
have Martin Shore, who's so funny too. It's both shows
are great, so excellent. Jimmy, we love you so much,
thanks for playing with me and I love you guys.
Have the best day you always you always have an
(01:53:31):
invitation to come see us, Come on downtown. We love you.
Bother bother you guys, Jimmy fallon Begon. You gotta watch
Password tonight. If you don't, I'll find you, I'll hunt
you down. We need to go on that show as
a show. Yeah, I don't know how we would do it. Yeah,
that would be cool. That would be pretty awesome. I
love him a password Tonight after America's Got Talent on NBC,
(01:53:56):
Let's do the three things we need to know? Gandhi,
What is going on? All right? A former Los Angeles
County fire captain had trouble keeping himself composed while testifying
in the Kobe Bryant helicopter crash photos trial. He walked
off the witness stand three times, saying he needed a break.
He told jurors that his trauma is so extreme he
doesn't remember even being at the crash site. He also
(01:54:17):
told attorneys that they're questioning brought to mind images that
are going to haunt him forever. He is currently one
of the group accused of taking graphic photos of human remains,
including those of Kobe Bryant, his daughter, and the seven
others who died in that tragic crash. New Jersey and
New York among the top states to live in based
on a new survey. Wallet Hub used a lot of
(01:54:38):
indicators to rank the states, including education, job opportunity, safety, weather,
cost of living. New Jersey came in second, New York
came in third. Overall, Massachusetts came in number one, and
Mississippi came in last. And finally, gas prices falling again
after staying relatively steady. Triple A says the national average
for a gallon of regular is now three dollars and
(01:54:58):
ninety four cents. Californi you have back to having the
nation's highest average price at five thirty five, and Texas
has the cheapest at three forty five. Those are your
three things. Els taste so good. Mcron man cry at
least strain in the Morning Show.