Trandescendant

Trandescendant

Father/daughter duo, Joe and Rya, discuss LGBTQ family issues and how to preserve positive relationships

Episodes

August 18, 2025 29 mins

What happens when the conversations that matter most feel impossible to have? Too many families avoid difficult talks until relationships reach a breaking point. They think they're protecting each other when they're actually making everything worse. Most family conflicts aren't caused by different beliefs. What matters is how we approach our loved ones. When you practice these two simple conversation techniques, even...

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Have you ever noticed how some of the most hurtful rejections come wrapped in language that sounds accepting? Coded phrases hide judgment behind politeness, creating what feels like acceptance but actually delivers conditional love with strings attached. From military culture to church communities, conditional acceptance creates exhausting energy costs for LGBTQ+ people who must constantly manage which parts of themselves are accep...

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The global landscape of LGBTQ+ rights reveals dramatic contrasts that might surprise you. While places like Iceland, Canada, and the Netherlands boast acceptance rates above 90%, over 30 countries in sub-Saharan Africa still criminalize LGBTQ+ identities entirely. Yet beneath these stark differences lies a hopeful truth: younger generations worldwide are driving unprecedented change. From Taiwan becoming Asia's first country t...

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July 28, 2025 30 mins

Is it better to stop hiding who you are, or are there times when staying private is the better choice? This question divides even the most supportive allies and LGBTQ+ advocates. From teenagers navigating hostile family situations to adults managing workplace dynamics, every coming out decision is complicated. The debate is even more layered when considering the differences in coming out between gay and transgender people. How can ...

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Real people are losing access to healthcare, having their gender markers erased, and watching their rights disappear with each new executive order and state law. While some allies post supportive messages online, many don't grasp the depth of fear gripping the LGBTQ+ community right now. Joe and Rya examine the harsh realities while also spotlighting victories around the world. When hate rises, so must we. That means moving fr...

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Thousands of Christian parents feel trapped between two impossible choices: fully supporting their LGBTQ+ child or staying faithful to their religious beliefs. This devastating dilemma tears families apart and leaves both parents and children feeling abandoned. Do we have to choose between them, or is it possible to have both?

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We know that many LGBTQ+ critics are tired of being painted as hateful bigots when their heart is in the right place. We understand your position because we believed exactly what you believe now, and we can explain why we changed our minds without calling you names or questioning your faith. This isn't another lecture about tolerance—it's a conversation from people who get where you're coming from and want to show yo...

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What if the real story about LGBTQ+ futures isn't what's dominating your social media timeline? While headlines focus on legislative battles and political backlash, the actual data reveals a dramatically different trajectory for 2026 and beyond. The geographic divide between high-equality and low-equality states is widening, creating both challenges and opportunities that most coverage misses entirely. Joe and Rya cut thr...

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Have you ever noticed how shame quietly shapes your life even though it doesn't actually belong to you? Shame isn't something we're born with—it's learned through societal messages, family dynamics, and religious teachings that told us we should feel inadequate for who we are. Your identity is a gift rather than a burden, and there is absolutely nothing shameful about being your true self.

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Have you ever thought someone had your back, only to find them missing when you actually needed support? The difference between someone who says they're an ally and someone who truly shows up can be the difference between feeling safe and feeling betrayed. Many people in the LGBTQ+ community would rather deal with outright hostility than fake support because at least with hostility, you know to keep your guard up. Learning to ...

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Rya marks her 10-year transition anniversary by sharing the hard-won wisdom that only comes from a decade of living authentically. These surprising discoveries reveal how to navigate the unexpected emotional challenges that no one prepares you for. How do you maintain loving relationships when everything changes? How do you find peace when letting go becomes necessary? If you're considering major life changes, supporting someo...

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Does visibility truly matter when your community feels isolated? Pride Month isn't just parades in big cities—it's survival in small towns, cautious celebration in suburbs, and bold expression in urban centers. Participating in Pride activities creates ripples of change that extend far beyond June, whether by raising a flag in a town of 1,000 or showing solidarity amid opposition. Those simple acts of visibility become li...

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May 26, 2025 32 mins

Have you ever felt like no one else understands what you're going through? Support groups offer more than just friendly faces—they provide crucial knowledge sharing, emotional validation, and the relief of not having to explain your experiences. Finding your people doesn't have to be overwhelming.  Even if you're convinced there's no support community anywhere near you, discover five proven strategies to find or...

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Have you ever feared that accepting your LGBTQ+ loved one might compromise your deeply-held values or beliefs? Many parents, relatives, and friends struggle with this exact tension, feeling forced to choose between their principles and their relationships. The truth is, you don't have to sacrifice either. Understanding the authentic, lifelong nature of LGBTQ+ identity opens a path where respect and love can flourish without re...

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Mental health professional Michael Larkey joins Joe and Rya to discuss the hidden culprit behind our nagging self-criticism. Why do we feel like we're never good enough? Why do we struggle with accepting ourselves or the ones we love? Especially for those in the LGBTQ+ community, the stakes can be life-threatening. This simple but powerful approach will finally free you from the torment in your mind.

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How do we respond when politics becomes personal? Representative Sarah McBride made history as the first openly transgender person elected to the United States Congress. She recently gave an insightful interview with The Atlantic where she shared her thoughtful approach to navigating hostility while maintaining focus on her constituents and mission. Joe and Rya unpack her powerful message of resilience and strategic optimism - wisd...

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Sometimes the most powerful thing you can say is nothing at all. Knowing when to use silence can completely transform difficult family conversations. While silence can feel uncomfortable at first—even like surrender—it actually demonstrates remarkable strength. If you're working to keep important relationship connections despite challenging differences, the use of silence might be the relationship-saving skill you've been...

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April 21, 2025 28 mins

When a child comes out as LGBTQ+, parental instincts shift into "fixing" mode. We approach with good intentions, believing we know what's best. Moving from fear to freedom means releasing our vision for our children and embracing their truth. When we let go of being right and lean into being kind, both parent and child find unexpected freedom. The relationship doesn't just survive — it emerges stronger than befo...

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Have you ever wondered who's truly in charge of your happiness? The real power to transform your life isn't held by external circumstances but lies within you, waiting to be reclaimed. It's time to reject conventional wisdom about where fulfillment comes from. Too many people never discover the surprising truth that our inner world determines our experience far more than our outer reality. Drawing from their unique p...

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What makes a parent respond with love when their child comes out? When Rya transitioned, Joe's immediate thought wasn't about changing her—it was about preserving their relationship. His values created the foundation for unconditional acceptance. Joe shares how his faith deepened his commitment to love rather than judgment. Their strong bond didn't just survive transition—it grew stronger, offering a blueprint for pa...

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