The Dickason Family Tragedy - Part Two: Very Sick or Very Wicked? - A Moment In Crime

Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
This episode of A Moment in Crime is the second
and a two part story. It is about the murder
of three young children by their mother. Their deaths are
outlined in detail. The episode also traverses the offender's extensive
mental health issues, fertility and miscarriage, and self harm, and
is intended for a mature audience. If you are struggling

(00:22):
or you're worried about a loved one, please see the
show notes for crisis help and support information. In September
twenty twenty one, Lauren Dickerson and her orthopedic surgeon husband Graham,
emigrated from South Africa to New Zealand when he got
a job at Timrou Hospital. The couple and their children,
leonee sex and two year old twins Maya and Carla,

(00:45):
spent two weeks in managed isolation at an Auckland hotel
before arriving at their new home on the mainland a
week later. Just twenty minutes after a husband left to
attend a work function, Lauren smothered the children to death.
She tucked them up in their beds, and then she
tried to take her own life. When Graham came home,

(01:07):
he walked in his front door straight into a nightmare.
He found the girls dead, his wife almost catatonic. Soon
after police converged on the scene. The next day, Lauren
Dickerson was charged with three counts of murder and so
began one of the biggest child death prosecutions in New
Zealand's history. This episode of A Moment in Crime is

(01:31):
the second of two parts telling the story of the
Dickerson family tragedy. Part one was about Lauren and Graham,
how they met, married, became parents, and their emigration journey.
This episode is about Lawrence High Court trial and what
happened to her afterwards. I attended every day of the
five week trial and will take you through both the

(01:53):
prosecution and defense cases, including what the expert witnesses told
the jury about Lauren's mental state. It was an incredibly
intense trial. The interest in the case and the case
itself were unprecedented in New Zealand. The evidence was extensive
and exhausting for the jury, the lawyers, the media, and

(02:13):
those who sat in the public gallery a max of
Lauren and Graham's family and members of the public from
the outset. Lauren admitted killing the girls. She admitted everything,
but she mounted a defense of insanity or infanticide, saying
she was so severely mentally unwell at the time that
she could not be held criminally responsible. Under New Zealand's

(02:37):
Crimes Act, a person cannot be convicted of an events
committed when they were laboring under natural imbecility or a
disease of the mind to such an extent they are
rendered incapable of understanding the nature and quality of their actions,
or knowing their actions were morally wrong. A person can
be found insane either in the time before their offense

(02:58):
or at the specific time of their offense. Infanticide under
New Zealand law operates both as a standalone offense and
as a partial defense to murder or manslaughter. Infanticide is
defined as a woman causing the death of any child
of hers under the age of ten, where at the
time of the offense the balance of her mind was disturbed.

(03:21):
That disturbance can be caused by the woman not having
recovered from the effect of giving birth to that or
any child. The onus was on the defense to prove
beyond reasonable doubt that Lauren Dickerson was so unwell she
could not be convicted of murder. The prosecution's job was
to convince the jury that while Lauren may have been

(03:41):
depressed to a high degree, she still knew what she
was doing was wrong and she was guilty of murder.
In this episode, I'll explain to you what happened in
court and why, as well as Lauren's sentencing in June
twenty twenty four. You'll also hear audio straight from the courtroom,
including what Graham's final words were on his wife's terrible actions.

(04:04):
As I said in the first part of a Moment
in Crime, the Dickinson family tragedy. This episode will be
upsetting for some people, but it's important to tell the
story from start to finish, to explain what happened to
these little girls and why, And in my opinion, it's
important you hear this story from someone who covered it
from start to finish, who attended every day of the

(04:27):
trial and can give a full account of the prosecution
and defense cases. If this episode brings up any issues
for you, or you're worried about a loved one or
any children, please see the show notes for a list
of crisis and support services. From the who Done Its
in Cold Cases to the Strange and Quirky Crime is
one of the most fascinating corners of society and the news.

(04:51):
From the New Zealand Herald newsroom. Comes a Moment in Crime.

Speaker 2 (04:54):
A podcast delving into some of New Zealand's most high
profile cases, offenses, and each month I'll take you inside
some of our most infamous incidents, notorious offenders, and behind
the scenes of high profile trials and events to show
you what's really happening in your backyard. On Monday July seventeenth,

(05:23):
twenty twenty three, Lauren Dickinson was transported from Hilmoorton Hospital
as a cure forensic mental health facility, to the High
Court at christ Church. She was taken up to the
holding area adjacent to Courtroom twelve to wait for her lawyers.
Once they arrived, they walked Lauren into the courtroom and
showed her where she would sit the judge's bench, the

(05:43):
jury box, where the Crown and the media would be
in the public gallery. Lauren had a psychiatric nurse with
her and two female corrections officers. It had been arranged
earlier that she would be accompanied to and from court
during her trial by the same people.

Speaker 1 (06:00):
All she was familiar with. Three nurses would take turns
sitting with Lauren, and the guards remained the same for
most of the trial. Journalists were allowed into the courtroom
at ten thirty am to set up. Unusually, Lauren was
already sitting in the dock. At a trial, the defendant
was not brought into court into the judges in place,
but due to Lauren's fragile mental health, it was decided

(06:22):
it was better to have her come in and get
situated first. It was the first time she had appeared
in court in person since she was charged. She hadn't
changed a lot. She still looked exhausted, pale, and drawn.
She looked troubled. She wore a simple black top and
a black and white pattern skirt. Her hair was down.
She wore no makeup or jewelry. Lauren looked significantly older

(06:45):
than her forty one years. The impact of the events
of twenty twenty one had clearly taken a toll on her.
At eleven am, jury selection began. When twelve men and
women were selected and sworn in, Lauren was arraigned. Each
char put to her for a plea. Lauren was calm
and composed and responded with a quiet not guilty. Justice

(07:08):
Cameron Mander then addressed the jury, outlining their responsibilities and
warning them that they had to make their decision based
on the facts of the case alone. There had been
a massive amount of coverage about the case so far,
and the jury were reminded it was crucial that they
did not carry out their own investigation and research during
the trial. Doing so was a criminal offense. Justice Mander said,

(07:33):
it is very important to keep an open mind, to
listen to all of the arguments and to listen to
my summing up before reaching any conclusions. Often in criminal
trials feelings of prejudice and sympathy are aroused. It is
at times difficult to stand aloof but you must endeavor
to do so. You must not allow your judgment to persuayed.

(07:54):
You need to remain entirely objective, no matter how difficult
that may be. Justice Mander said the jury needed to
be dispassionate and not let their emotions get in the
way of them assessing the evidence objectively and analytically. He
briefly outlined the defense of insanity and a fanticide and
said the jury would hear a breadth of evidence about

(08:16):
each of those. He said those matters would be central
to the case it is for the Crown to prove
beyond reasonable doubt that this is not a case of infanticide,
he said. Justicemander then invited Crown Prosecutor Andrew mc cray
to open the case against Lauren. For the first time,
details about how Lauren killed her children and what she

(08:39):
told police afterwards could be reported. Andrew McCrae stood and
faced the jury. He outlined the allegations against Lauren, that
she smothered her children to death one by one after
strangling them with cable ties had failed. He spoke of
her mental health history, her fertility journey and the loss

(08:59):
of a baby before before Leonnae was born. He spoke
of the couple's plan for a better life in New
Zealand and what they went through to move here from
South Africa. He said it was no secret Lauren suffered
from a depressive disorder. It was no secret that she
had a lifelong issue with anxiety and perfectionism. It was
no secret she struggled with her children. The day they died,

(09:22):
McCrae said, Lauren simply snapped. He said, there is no
doubt in this case that the defendant was responsible for
killing her own children. The issue is whether she intended
to kill the children in anger, frustration, or resentment for
how they were getting in the way of her relationship.
She knew what she was doing before, during, and after.

(09:43):
She acted methodically, even clinically. The defendant was angry at
her children for not listening and for jumping on the couch.
The pressure she was under made her snap. The anger
was bubbling over. She was resentful at the way the
children got in the way of her relationship with her husband.
McCray revealed that police had accessed thousands of text messages

(10:07):
and emails sent by and to Lauren before she killed
her children. He said the number of these messages and
the type of messages, along with Internet searchers and her
statement to police, ultimately what she has admitted shows a
relationship with the children that was loving at times and
fraught at others. The messages show missus Dickerson harbored resentment

(10:28):
and anger towards her children when they were misbehaving. Lauren
told friends she was frustrated with the children that she
felt outnumbered. There was also financial and relationship pressures. Three
kids has rarely killed. All the passion and a lot
of the happiness she said in one message about her marriage.
Lauren also spoke of hurting or murdering the girls in

(10:50):
various other messages. McCray said messages to her best friend
the night before the girls died were revealing and a
chief indicator of what was running through Lauren's mind. She wrote,
our kids are driving us crazy, though wild, cheeky and disobedient.
Graham and I are run down. I wish I could

(11:11):
give them back and start over. I would decide differently.
McCray also told the jury that before leaving South Africa,
Lauren had searched the Internet about drugs that could be
used to overdose children, and there was evidence that Lauren
had had thoughts about killing her children long before the
fatal act. When McCray had finished, Lauren's lawyer, Karen Beaton

(11:33):
spoke briefly to the jury. She said a full defense
opening would be delivered later in the trial, but at
the outset she wanted them to know that Lauren was
a loving mother and wife who went through seventeen rounds
of IVF to have her daughters, she said, and yet
she killed them, and it was violent and it was prolonged,
but afterwards she put them in their beds, tucked them

(11:56):
in with their soft toys. This is brutal and conf fronting.
You will be rightly shocked and horrified. But the truth
is that Lauren Dickerson wanted those children very much, and
she loved her family. Beaton said, when Lauren killed the girls,
she was in the midst of a severe mental breakdown.
Her husband and family knew she was unwell, but had

(12:19):
no idea how bad things really were. Beaton said, Lauren
was in such a dark place, so removed from reality,
so disordered in her thinking, that when she decided to
kill herself that night, she thought she had to take
the girls with her. After the opening addresses were done,
the Crown began to call witnesses. The first was Graham Dickerson.

(12:44):
The jury first watched Graham's recorded police interview, then he
was questioned further by the Crown and cross examined by
the defense. His evidence, given via audio visual link from Pretoria,
spanned several days. Graham spoke extensive about his wife's IVF
treatments and her mental health, how she was as a mother,

(13:04):
and how she seemed to him during and after their
move to New Zealand. During his evidence, Graham revealed his
wife had spoken to him on three occasions about harming
the children before she killed them. Here is what he
said in court. We were not allowed to record his voice,
so these are his exact words, read by an actor.

Speaker 3 (13:25):
The first incident was roughly in May twenty nineteen. It
was a normal night the nights that nanny came. Lauren
was helping with settling down the twins. When she came
back into the main kitchen area. I could see that
she was crying and she looked anxious. I immediately asked you,
what's wrong. I cannot remember the exact words, but she
said she felt like she could do something to the babies.

(13:45):
She didn't specify what she meant. I sat with her
and tried to calm move down. She was crying. I
phoned her mother, who immediately came over, and we just
tried to talk to Lauren and find out what was
bothering her.

Speaker 1 (13:58):
Lauren went and saw a psychiatrist and was told she
likely had postpartum depression. She continued having treatment and took medication.
Her husband suspected the anxiety attack was a combination of
sleepless nights and fatigue and frustrations with the children who
did not sleep well. He told the court he didn't
recall any other issues from that period. Further, his wife improved.

(14:23):
Graham recalled that she had less anxiety and, in his words,
seemed to have a good relationship and misfunctioning well with
the children after that. The second incident Graham told the
jury about was in July twenty twenty one, when the
couple was still working towards emigrating. Lauren had a severe
anxiety attack and told her husband she could make an

(14:44):
end to it all. Graham questioned her about her comment.
She told him she felt like she could sedate the
children and cut their femeral arteries so it can just
all be over. He told the jury he wasn't worried
about her doing it, more about why she was saying it.
He was adamant Lauren was not a violent person, and
said it was the first time he had ever heard

(15:06):
her say something like that. Graham asked Lauren to see
her doctor again, but the next morning things seemed to
be back to normal and he didn't take any further action,
suspecting her startling comments were only connected with her anxiety.
The third incident was when the family was staying with
Graham's mother before they moved to New Zealand. By then

(15:27):
it was too late for them to stay in South Africa.
Their home was sold, their belongings on route to New Zealand.
They didn't have jobs. Here's what Graham disclosed at the trial,
again read by an actor.

Speaker 3 (15:40):
Lauren came to me out of the blue. I believe
her words were, I'm having that feeling again. I told
her immediately to take your anti anxiety meds. It was
a much lesser incident. I think my head was just
in a mode of we need to get you on
a plane and get to New Zealand. I hoped once
we got there, all the things that had been worrying
Lauren would stop. I had this vision, and I did

(16:01):
everything I could to get us there. I knew she
was scared, but I was also stared. But knowing her
for fifteen years, I honestly felt we should complete this journey.
And she never told me she wanted to pull the
pluge and not go. It wasn't an option at that stage.
It would have been harder to stay in South Africa.
At that stage, we would have been starting from scratch.

Speaker 1 (16:22):
When Graham finished giving his evidence and answered a number
of questions from the defense and cross examination, the Crown
began working its way through the rest of the witness list. McCray,
assisted by Prosecutor Sean MacManus, moved through the first responders
who were called to Queen Street the night the girls died,
some of Graham's colleagues and their wives who had spent
time with Lauren when the family arrived in Tibodou and

(16:44):
Leone Khla and Meyer's teachers. They heard from the doctor
who treated Lauren at Timadoo Hospital. They heard several days
of evidence about the messages Lauren sent him received. As
you can imagine, the evidence spanned hours upon hours, and
I won't be presenting it all here, but I will
explain the most important points. If you want to find

(17:05):
out more about the trial, you can find my coverage
on enzid Herald dot co dot inzed. I'll include a
link in the show notes to my author bio where
you can find a full account of each witness and
what they told the jury at Lauren's trial. Messages sent
and received by Lauren Dickerson made up a big part
of the crown case. As part of the police investigation,

(17:26):
dubbed Operation Royal, A detective was tasked with analyzing the
contents of Lauren's phone. He went through more than three
hundred and thirty thousand messages sent and received by Lauren
from her husband, family and friends. The messages spanned from
twenty sixteen to several hours before the children were killed,
through the pandemic and lockdowns in South Africa, the immigration process,

(17:50):
the family's isolation period before getting on the plan into
New Zealand, managed isolation in Auckland, and getting to timrou.
In many of them messages, Lauren revealed her frustrations about
her children and their behavior. McCray told the jury that
the messages provided crucial insight into Lauren's anger towards her kids.

(18:11):
The first example he read out was a message from
Lauren to a friend saying she was going to start
leonee on Augmenton because she was keeping her awake at night.
She moans all the fucking time, Lauren wrote, before referencing
strangling the little girl. In another message, she said, I'm
afraid one day I will smack her too hard. In

(18:33):
a number of other messages, Laurence spoke of the difficulties
she had raising the twins and how she often had
no time for her older daughter. On one occasion, a
friend asked her what Netflix show she was watching. Lauren
told her and said the show was very good, adding otherwise,
I'm just trying not to murder the twins. She also
spoke of murdering the twins or all three children, and

(18:56):
various other messages. The women then spoke about a or
they knew who had separated as a result of stress
with their children. In many messages, Laurence spoke about having
rough days with her children, being overwhelmed, emotional, stressed and tired,
crying or being on the verge of tears, and others.
She disclosed her struggle and frustrations as a mother and

(19:18):
with her long term depression and anxiety. Here are some
of the messages that were read to the jury. While
these are Lauren Dickerson's actual words, this is not her voice.

Speaker 4 (19:30):
I think God is trying to torture me by giving
me the noisiest kids ever. They're making me crazy. My
heart is very sore because I love my kids so
but at the moment I just wish for a day alone.
Every morning and during the day is like wartime with
my depression. Three kids has really killed all the passion

(19:51):
and a lot of the happiness. They almost called you
because I was suicidal. Please don't tell Graham. These kids
really tie me out physically, and it feels like my
fuse is just so short the whole time, and I
want to explode over the tiniest things. Graham and I
don't get time alone. We barely talk to each other.
I feel like I just want to run away. Tonight,

(20:14):
Graham and I decided that our children will not abuse
and scream at us and hit us any further. From
now on, they will get hidings, and all their nice
things will be held back until they start showing some respect.
Tonight they threw corn at me and said the meat
is disgusting. Then they hit me when I told them off.

(20:34):
Maybe the twins are just in terrible twos, but fuck,
they're going to kill me. I was so angry tonight,
I was shaking. I'm under the care of a doctor
for depression, but even though the meds work most of
the time, I get overwhelmed so easily, and the anxiety
gets so bad I cannot eat, sleep, or function properly.

(20:56):
I think most of it is caused by frustration and
boredom as I look after the babies during the day
and I feel as if I have no identity of
my own.

Speaker 1 (21:36):
After the message evidence was presented, the video of Lauren
speaking to police was played in court. The video was
about an hour long. During the interview, Lauren confessed to
killing the children, outlining how she did it and why.
I covered the interview in depth in the first part
of a Moment in Crime, the Dickinson family tragedy. If

(21:57):
you haven't listened to that, I highly recommend going back
doing so before listening further. Here's how Lauren began with
the police. These are her words, read by an actor.

Speaker 4 (22:08):
I don't even know where to start. It just got
too overwhelming, and with the new visa thing that came
through yesterday, I just see no hope for us here
in the future. Just getting on the airplane was enough
of an effort. There was too much paperwork to be done.
And then there was the two weeks in MiQ which
almost had us crazy. Something just snapped last night. I

(22:32):
just couldn't anymore. I was so tired of screaming, saying no. Basically,
the kids were being wild again, jumping on the couches,
not listening to what I'm trying to tell them. I
have been thinking about it for sure. Last night something
just triggered me. I went to the garage. I saw

(22:53):
some cable ties there. I thought that could possibly work.

Speaker 1 (22:57):
Lauren's police interview was the last part of the Crown
case before they called their expert evidence. In a trial
like this, there is an order of how things are done.
The Crown presents general witnesses first, followed by the defense.
Expert witnesses are then called before each side gives a
formal closing address to the jury and hand over to
the judge to summarize the entire trial and send them

(23:20):
to deliberate. So once Andrew McCrae rested the Crown case,
Lauren's lawyers took center stage in the courtroom. Kieran Beaton
had given a brief statement to the jury on day
one of the trial, but the full opening of the
defense case was delivered by Anne Tooey. She told the
jury there was no denying Lauren had killed her three children,

(23:40):
but it was not murder. Rather, she did the unthinkable
act out of love. After deciding to take her own
life and not wanting to leave the little girls to
live without a mum. Tooey said, Lauren was in such
a dark place, so removed from reality, so so soide
idle and disordered that when she decided to kill herself,

(24:03):
she thought that she had to take the girls with her.
Lauren felt inadequate as a mother. She found it hard
to cope. This was spontaneous. Lauren was in a dark place.
She believed life was no longer worth living, either for
her or her children. She decided to kill herself, and
then she felt that they were all better off dead.

(24:25):
Her intention was to go to bed and to never
wake up. The question is why she did that. All
three defense experts say her mind was disturbed by reason
of her postpartum depression arising from childbirth. All of the
defense experts agree that there was an altruistic motive. That
means that Lauren killed her children out of love. In

(24:48):
her mind, she was killing them out of love. She
was killing herself, and she didn't want to leave the children.
She was so sure this was the right thing to do,
so she persisted. Tui said the death of the children
was the direct result of Lauren suffering a significant mental disturbance.
The woman was severely unwell and had effectively been spiraling

(25:11):
into a deep depression with suicidal thoughts for months. Tui said,
this is about postpartum depression and a mother who killed
her children. She did not want to leave her children
without a mum. She also did not want her children
to suffer from having such a bad mother. This was
an impulsive decision. She did not plan it. Why did

(25:32):
she kill her three beautiful girls, whom she fought for
years to get through brutal IVF treatments, Her girls whom
she loved and protected. The answer is that Lauren was
severely mentally unwell on that night.

Speaker 4 (25:45):
There is no.

Speaker 1 (25:46):
Question about that. TUIs said there been a steep decline
in Lauren's mental health from July twenty twenty one. She
began to think that she was failing as a mother,
which happened at a time when she had stopped taking
her antidepressant medication. After she had thoughts of wanting to
hurt the girls in August twenty twenty one, which she
told her husband about. She started taking the medication again,

(26:08):
but TOOI said. The pills take time to build up
and were not like panadole for a headache, as it
turned out six weeks was not enough time, she said, two,
he said. In the weeks leading up to the Dickersons
moving to New Zealand, Lauren's family and husband were all
desperately worried about her. She said she stopped eating, she

(26:30):
wasn't sleeping much. She lost interest and pleasure in everything.
She told police that it was taking her ages to
do simple tasks. These are all symptoms of depression. During
that week in Timadoo, everything looked bleak to Lauren. There
was a power cut, just like there've been in South Africa.
She thought the children at Leonaie's school looked sad and unkempt,

(26:52):
and of course they weren't. They were just normal little
children having fun. Their house was small, the weather was hold,
the rental market was terrible. When you're depressed, everything looks terrible.
It is so important to understand this. The day the
girls died, Lauren was triggered by the request for more
information about her and Carla's health by Immigration New Zealand.

(27:16):
Her stress was exacerbated later when she was at the
park with Graham and the children, and some teenage girls
told her that a man had been there taking photos
of them. Two He said, at this stage, Lauren was
so unwell she thought New Zealand was not safe, and
her application for a visa was hopeless. By the time
these two things happened, Lauren was so deep into her depression,

(27:38):
removed from reality, that she decided to die and take
her daughters with her. If you find that Lauren's mind
was disturbed at the time this happened due to postpartum depression,
then this is not murder, it's infanticide. And if she
didn't know what she was doing was morally wrong that night,
then she's not guilty of murder or infanticide. That is insanity.

(28:01):
Lauren's mother, Wendy Fawkes, was the first offense witness called.
She'd been in court every day during the trial, supported
by her husband, Malcolm and another relative. She spoke about
how dia Lauren's health appeared before she left for New Zealand.
She said Lauren was absent and she was worried a
breakdown was imminent. Wendy said there were changes in Lauren,

(28:22):
especially in the last couple of weeks. She stopped communicating.
She was very flat. I was extremely worried about her.
I've never seen Lauren in such a bad mental state.
Lauren became more distant in her messages to me. She
told me how broken she is. When Dy admitted to
the court, she had significant reservations about Lauren and Graham

(28:43):
moving to New Zealand. She said, neither of them had
been here before. I was worried they would lose their
support networks. I raise this with them, the realities of emigrating.
But once Lauren has made up her mind, you can't
tell her what to do. I said to Graham, I
was worried about Lauren. She'd lost a lot of weight,
she was absent. Things got worse as the departure date neared.

(29:07):
Lauren wasn't communicating her mother said. I said to Graham
that I was really worried, and he said, Mum, everything's
going to be okay, but if we have one more
bump in the road, I'm going to stop at all.
The last time I saw them was the night before
they flew out. We didn't even go inside. We just
went to say goodbye. The children stilled on the upstairs

(29:27):
balcony and waved. Lauren came and gave me a hug.
She was very distant. She seemed out of it. Disconnected.
She seemed frail. I didn't realize Lauren was suicidal. Despite
her concerns and knowing about at least one episode where
Lauren revealed thoughts of harming the kids, Wendy never saw
anything to make her worry about the children. Their safety

(29:50):
was her priority. She absolutely loved them, she said of
her daughter. Another family member told the jury it was
clear Lauren was not coping and the lead up to
the move. Her name is suppressed permanently, but her evidence
is not. She said she was speaking less, She had
a much more sad demeanor, a big trigger for me,
a sign that she was really struggling. I came to

(30:12):
a home and she declined me coming in for coffee
with her. That was a first for me, a first
in our relationship. That was when I really knew she
was struggling. She couldn't even speak to me. On the
thirty first of July twenty twenty one, a family gathering
was held to farewell Graham, Lauren and the kids. The
relative said Lauren was there, but not and very vacant

(30:34):
and quiet. I was very worried, she said. The day
before the girls were killed, the woman received a photo
in a group chat of Lauren with Leone on her
first day of school. She said the photo was shocking.
Lauren had lost more weight from her already painfully thin frame.
She was completely drowning in a tracksuit top that would
usually fit. She told the court it was by far

(30:58):
the worst I have ever seen her. She looked gray,
She looked like she couldn't even focus. At the end
of the second week of the trial, the first expert
witness was called. The Crown had two, the defense had three.
Like with the general evidence, the experts spoke at length
about their assessments of Lauren before giving their final opinion.

(31:19):
Did she have a defense of insanity oron fanticide or
should she be held criminally responsible for her actions. Each
expert spent two or more full days in court. Again,
it's simply not possible to take you through every line
of this evidence. It was also extremely repetitive at times,
as you can imagine, But I'll run you through a

(31:40):
summary of what Lauren told each expert and their assessment
of her. The first Crown witness was doctor Eric Monasterio,
a consultant forensic psychiatrist with almost thirty years of experience
as a specialist assessor. He is the former clinical director
and Director of Mental Health Services for the Canterbury Regional
Forensic Service, and his experience in hundreds of homicides, including

(32:03):
specific insanity and infanticide cases. Monasterio interviewed Lauren four times,
nine hours in total, as soon as she was well
enough after the children died. Lauren told him about the
hours before she killed the girls, saying she felt like
a failed mother, like a spring getting tighter, and that
she was going to do something. She said, I didn't

(32:25):
feel like myself. I couldn't see myself going through another day.
All I wanted was some quiet. I want this to stop.
I didn't want to feel like a bad parent anymore.
Lauren told Monasterio that she had not planned a suicide
method until after she killed her daughters. She felt deeply depressed, despondent, hopeless,
and pessimistic, the worst she had felt in her entire life.

(32:50):
Monasterio's final conclusion was that there was no doubt Lauren
had a mental illness, but it wasn't severe enough for
her to have a defense of insanity or infanticide. Further,
he found there was no evidence of an altruistic motive.
It was more likely Lauren killed the girls out of
anger and frustration. He said she systematically strangled the children

(33:12):
and seemingly methodically checked for vital signs before resorting to
smothering them until they were dead. The alleged offenses are
unlikely to have been impulsive, in my opinion, as a
defendant maintained awareness and behaves systematically. There is no evidence
she was in an automatic state or that she didn't
understand the nature and qualities of her actions at the
material time. Monasterio also said in his opinion, giving Lauren

(33:37):
had battled depression since she was fifteen, she could not
claim her disease of the mind was connected to childbirth
that removed and fanticided as a defense. Monasterio told the
court that Lauren's story changed between his first and fourth
interviews with her. Initially, she admitted to killing the girls
with no clear plan on how she would commit suicide afterwards,

(34:00):
but later she claimed she killed them as part of
her own suicide. Monasterio said she reported that she realized
she committed the offenses to protect my children. She reported,
I couldn't leave them behind, they would suffer too much.
I was very, very sick. I have never been that depressed.
She was convinced her children would not be able to

(34:20):
cope and would suffer too much if she committed suicide
and left them behind. The second Crown expert was doctor
Simon mccleevey, a forensic psychiatrist at Hilmarton Hospital. She first
interviewed Lauren six days after the girls died. She, like Monasterio, said,
while there was no question Lauren had a disease of

(34:40):
the mind, there simply was not any evidence of insanity.
She concluded, it remains my opinion that the defendant's disease
of the mind did not seriously impair her reality testing
ability and capacities. I'm of the opinion that this is
a tragic case where a mentally disordered woman with a
vulnerable person killed her children in the context which she

(35:03):
perceived to be beyond her limited capacity to manage stress
in addition to underlying mental illness. Mcleevey also told the
jury that while she initially noted the killings were impulsive,
her opinion had since changed and she believed now though
were possibly premeditated. She said the fact that Lauren had
carried out Google searches about overdosing her children was compelling.

(35:26):
Paired with Lauren's earlier admissions she'd thought of hurting or
killing the girls, she felt there could have been a
degree of planning. She said she had a very clearly
informed intention to harm the children. There was more than
idiation that was planning. There was consideration for specific means
and methods. There was a loss of control to act
on the thoughts. She snapped. There was an isolated incident

(35:50):
in which there was a loss of control. The defendant
was not rendered incapable of understanding moral wrongfulness at the
time she killed her children. I do believe she had
the capacity to make the decisions. Her capacity was not
grossly impaired. The first expert witness for the defense was

(36:34):
doctor Susan Hatters Friedman, a forensic and reproductive psychiatrist. She
traveled to New Zealand from the US to give evidence.
Hattis Friedman was described by the defense as a world
renowned expert on how to carry out psychiatric evaluations of
mothers who have killed their children. They told the jury
she had also published extensively on philiside. She spent ten

(36:56):
hours interviewing Lauren across four days. During that Lauren admitted
she frequently had thoughts and images in her head about
killing her children before she actually did it. The first time,
she had a feeling but not a plan. The second time,
not long before the move to Timbdoo, was more intense.
She told the expert, an image flashed into my head

(37:17):
of sedating the girls, putting them in a bath, cutting
their femeral arteries, and putting them to bed. Lauren was
horrified and went to tell Graham, saying she was scared
and felt that everything was unraveling. She said. He became angry,
telling her if anyone heard what she was saying, they
would lock her up and she would never see the
girls again. He told her put on your big girl

(37:39):
panties and to pull herself together for him and the children.
Soon after, Graham asked her if she wanted to be
taken to a psychiatric ward, and Lauren said no, as
she worried it would mess up the emigration plan. She
kept having thoughts of killing the children, of pushing them
in their beds to rest forever. When the family were

(38:00):
packing to leave South Africa, the children playing with a
packet of cable ties purchased to keep suitcases securely closed,
she had the thought this is another way children could
get hurt. She put the cable ties away, scared of
what she might do. Lauren told Hatter's freedman the thoughts
terrified her, but she didn't tell Graham due to his

(38:20):
angry reaction. Earlier, Hatter's Freedman gave fascinating evidence about philicide
and what drove parents to kill their children. In Lauren's case,
she concluded it was a situation of a parent killing
out of love rather than out of anger or hate.
She said she had been severely depressed and had developed
psychotic thinking. She attempted to kill herself. She viewed the

(38:43):
world as dangerous for her children to grow up in.
She saw a joint suicide and philicide as a way
out of this for her beloved children and herself. She
thought that she was getting her children to safety. In
her opinion, Lauren was laboring under a disease of the
mind to such an extent that it rendered her incapable
of knowing the act was morally wrong. She thought that

(39:05):
children would be better off in heaven because she was
the worst wife and mother. At the time of the
alleged defending her, depression had significantly worsened and she had
developed psychotic features, becoming out of touch with reality. She
conceptualized that killing the children was the right thing to do.
She described circumstances consistent with an altruistic motive for the

(39:26):
murder of her children. It is further my opinion that
at the time of her alleged defending, the balance of
her mind was disturbed by a reason of the disorder
of consequence upon childbirth. Specifically, she had been suffering from
a severe depression, which was closely tied to her infertility, pregnancy, loss, postpartum,
and parenting. Forensic psychiatrist Justin Barry Walsh said it was

(39:51):
clear to him Lauren's fatal actions were motivated by her
severe and increasing depression. He refuted claims made by other
experts that Lauren killed her children out of anger. He said,
this woman was so depressed she decided she had to die,
and she decided she had to take the children with her.
That is the only plausible explanation as to why she

(40:11):
did what she did. It's tragically easier to kill your
children than yourself. This was a deliberate, methodical, ghastly series
of events where she didn't just kill one of her children,
She killed all three of her children, one after the other.
That is not consistent with someone who's just angry. It
doesn't get close. In my view, he believed Lauren's depression

(40:32):
was severe enough at the time of the offending to
support defenses of both insanity and infanticide. She didn't just
slash out in an appalling methodical way she killed all
three children. This woman was depressed, and she was getting
more depressed. And as she got more depressed, she got
to a position where she couldn't see any way of
going on. She got to a position where she decided

(40:55):
she had to suicide. She also decided that her children
will be bare off dead, and it was that apparent
logic that drove her to commit this act. In my view,
it was more than likely because of her depression that
she acted in the way she did. Barry Walsh told
the court that if he had seen Lauren on the
day of the alleged murders, taken her history and considered

(41:18):
her lack of support in New Zealand, he would have
admitted her to a psychiatric ward, he said, and if
she declined treatment, I would have thought she readily met
the criteria for compulsory treatment under the Mental Health Act.
Her motive for killing the children was part of her
suicidal thinking. She was in the grips of rapidly worsening depression.

(41:39):
Not only overwhelmed by viewing the world through a negative lens,
she believed killing the children was morally correct at the time.
In that mental state, she was unable to reason as
to the moral wrongfulness of her actions, and beyond that
would seem to believe that her actions were morally correct.
The weight of evidence is sufficient to say sustain the

(42:00):
defense that missus Dickinson was not guilty by reason of insanity.
She could not see a way out of it. Killing
the children felt right. Barry Walsh said in establishing Lauren's
motivation for the killings, a critical piece of evidence was
what actually happened. He said, this is a woman with
no history of previous offending, who had children through IVF,

(42:24):
who comes to New Zealand and kills the three of
them in a sustained and deliberate way over twenty minutes
to half an hour. That is an unusual act. And
then of itself then later on the history research shows
that in these rare events, often these women may be
depressed and that depression may be central to the actions
at the time she was depressed. That in itself is enough.

(42:48):
There is a clear exis between her depression and her
actions at the time. It is my conclusion that there
was a connection to childbirth. She was vulnerable to postpartum depression.
She'd had a press ovious postpartum depression. She did this
extraordinarily awful thing at a time where she was getting
more and more depressed. Forensic psychologist doctor Garzi Metwei was

(43:12):
the final of the expert witnesses to be called. Lauren
had told him she thought killing her little girls would
be a happy ending for everyone after the family made
the huge mistake of emigrating to New Zealand. She told
him her world was falling apart and she was unraveling,
and she was convinced death for her and her children
was the only way out of a helpless and hopeless situation.

(43:36):
Metwe interviewed Lauren nine times for about twenty hours in total.
He concluded that both insanity and infanticide defenses were available
to her. While the killings were brutal, callous, determined and deliberate,
he felt Lauren could not be held criminally responsible. He
said I do not consider that her mental state at

(43:56):
the time of the alleged defending precluded her from understanding
the nature and quality of the acts. To the contrary,
I consider that she was purposeful and deliberate throughout her
offending and acted with full conscious awareness of her actions
and with great determination to pursue her aims the killing
of her three young children. However, such was the severity

(44:18):
of her depressive illness and associated distorted thinking at the
time that ultimately she thought she and her children were
better off dead. It is my opinion that she did
not know that the alleged acts were morally wrong to
the commonly accepted standard of right and wrong. She has
a defense of insanity regarding in fanticide that was very
clear to Metwi. He said, Lauren's problems with depression in

(44:42):
the eleven year period leading up to killing her daughters
were very much embroiled in her fertility problems, losing her
first child, anti natal anxiety, and then post natal depression
that remained chronic. Of all of the experts, Lauren was
the most open with met Wei about the day she
killed her children. The demands for more information from Immigration

(45:03):
New Zealand was the straw that broke the camel's back.
She said she lay in bed for hours, feeling nauseous
and unable to move, feeling like her world was falling apart.
She said she began to have negative ruminations about her
and her family's futures and thought, I don't know how
I'm going to live here. Is what she told Metwi.

(45:25):
Her words are read by an actor.

Speaker 4 (45:27):
I was so out of control, trying to figure out
in my head how to get back to South Africa.
My thoughts were so disorted, everything was unraveling. I didn't
want to hurt my children. I wanted them to be
with me. I was feeling we made a huge mistake,
impossible to extricate from. I felt helpless and hopeless.

Speaker 1 (45:51):
When Graham left the house at seven pm, Lauren said
she had no plan to kill the children or herself. However,
the thoughts in her head about hurting the kids were
relentless and there was so much noise. Minutes later, Carla
threw a tantrum and started to bite Lauren's clothing. She
said she got tunnel vision and decided she could not

(46:11):
live another day. She told met Wei she was totally
out of control and finished She said, I felt.

Speaker 4 (46:19):
Like I was going to explode. I wanted everything to end.
Everything was failing.

Speaker 1 (46:26):
Lauren gathered the girls in the bedroom to contain them,
as she didn't want to be running round after them,
she explained. After she killed the girls, she picked them
up and put them in their beds and tucked them
in with their blankets how they always slept. She explained
that she covered the little girls so she didn't have
to see their faces. She told met Wi.

Speaker 4 (46:48):
I loved them. I wanted to tuck them in one
last time.

Speaker 1 (46:53):
She was drenched in sweat and shaking. She changed from
her clothes into her pajamas and began trying to difffferent
ways to end her life.

Speaker 4 (47:02):
She said, I didn't want to leave them without a mum.
I loved them too much. The last thing I remember
doing is lying down with Liane. I was just glad
it was all going to end. It was meant to
be a happy ending for everyone, but it's not a

(47:22):
happy ending.

Speaker 1 (47:51):
On August eleven, twenty twenty three, the Crown and defense
delivered their final statements to the jury. Prosecutor Andrew McCrae,
so the crown case was sim Lauren Dickerson murdered her
three little girls out of anger and her need for
control over her family. She knew what she was doing
and the consequences, and she didn't contemplate stopping. And while

(48:13):
she was significantly unwell with depression, her condition was not
bad enough for her to have a defense of insanity
or infanticide.

Speaker 5 (48:21):
He said.

Speaker 1 (48:22):
Undoubtedly the depression affected her decision making at that moment,
but not to such a degree that she was unable
to understand her actions were morally wrong. She ought to
still be held fully responsible for what she's done. She
wasn't so unwell she has a medical defense available to her.
On the contrary, her actions are explained by two primary drivers,

(48:44):
her anger at her children's behavior and her need for
control in that isolated moment. There was a loss of
control in the context of the situation she was in.
Once she started doing what she was doing to the girls,
there was no turning back. McCray said it was also
crucial for the jury to look at Lauren's credibility. He
said what she told police and the first psychiatric experts

(49:06):
to assess her was the truth, and later accounts were
effectively her attempting to rationalize her actions. Mccrazy Dickinson's accounts
to clinicians and five experts, two for the Crown and
three for the defense, were inconsistent. He said, it shifts,
it changes, it evolves. Her accounts did not indicate that

(49:27):
this was done out of love, or that she did
this because it was in their best interest. Her action
was very much done in a moment of anger. Her
account varies so much because of the treatment provided to
her and her very natural desire to rationalize this very
terrible act. McCrae said any suggestion of an altruistic motive
was an idea introduced to Lauren during her later psychiatric treatment.

(49:52):
He told the jury to be skeptical of Lauren's claims
she killed the girls because she didn't want to leave
them behind. When she committed suicide, He said it was
an act done out of anger as a consequence of
the children's behavior at the time. McCray was critical of
the defense experts, saying they did not undertake robust testing
of Lauren's account and ignored crucial information. Further, their assessments

(50:14):
lacked rigor, and they did not test her account sufficiently
and accepted it unchallenged. Overall, the defense experts did not
consider information that was contrary to their theory on Lauren.
Disregarding evidence that did not fit, McCray said, they didn't
look hard enough. It is clear that anger is present.

(50:34):
The Crown accept that missus Dickinson was unwell. What happened
here was a perfect storm. She was subject to a
new stressor that caused her to snap. Her anger is
proven with her relationship with her children, seen over the year,
in her text messages, in her police interview, and in
her own interviews with the experts. The Crown say the
defense experts were blinded by the defendant's explanation of altruism.

(50:58):
The Crown say the defense knew she was going to
kill them, She knew the nature of the act, she
knew the consequence. McCrae said the jury would be satisfied
beyond a reasonable doubt that Lauren had committed murder. He
suggested the most important piece of evidence was what Lauren
told police in her first interview. He said, it's the

(51:20):
very first account, free of any influence. The Crown say
it's the one you should take the most from. There
can be no suggestion the content is wrong or misleading.
The content describes anger towards the girls. It is the
first account of why she did what she did. She
must have known what she was doing was morally wrong.

(51:41):
If she was worried about the possibility of discovery, she
made efforts to clean up the scene. She's understanding what
she's doing. You will be drawn to the inevitable conclusion
that she knew what she was doing was morally wrong,
and the defense of insanity is not available to her.
And as difficult as this is, you will find herty
of murder. It is clear that anger is the significant

(52:03):
motivator in this case. Lauren's lawyer, Karen Beaton's closing address
was powerful. She explained again how Lauren killed her little
girls one by one, then tucked them into bed with
their soft toy sheep and blankets, and told them that
she loved them for the very last time. The act
was horrific and shocking, but not murder. Rather, they were

(52:26):
the actions of a deeply unwell woman who could not
bear to live another day and decided to die, and
to protect her children, decided to take them with her.
Betan said, her beautiful girls, whom she loved so much.
The deaths don't have anything to do with anger or resentment,
and they have everything to do with what was a
severe mental illness. This is the very kind of case

(52:49):
that the law of infanticide was designed for. The Crown
told you that Lauren was stressed, that the anger bubbled
over from many aspects of her life, and that she
was resentful of the kids and how she stood in
the way of a relationship with her husband, and that's
why she killed them. And you were told by the
Crown that this is about anger and about control, and
not about a medical defense, not about mental illness. But

(53:11):
mothers don't kill their children the way Lauren did just
because they're angry or resentful or stressed. We've all been angry, resentful,
stressed and anxious ourselves. They're normal human emotions and responses.
But we haven't gone and done anything remotely like what
Lauren did, let alone in such a violent and harrowing way.

(53:32):
She was experiencing a major episode of depression with such
severity that not only did she think she had to
kill herself, but she had to take her girls with her.
Beaton said, any suggestion Lauren killed her children in anger
and resentment is just nonsense. She said, Lauren Dickerson was
a woman who wanted to give her children the very

(53:52):
best in life that she could. Thoughts of harming your
children are very much a symptom of postpartum depression and suicide,
and anes and fanticide are risks of postpartum depression, and
mothers who are suicidal are at higher risk of infanticide.
She was severely unwell by the sixteenth of September twenty
twenty one, and the people close to Lauren knew, but

(54:14):
they didn't recognize it for what it was. They thought
pushing through was the answer, that coming to New Zealand
would reduce the stress on Lauren and things would get better.
But they didn't. Coming to New Zealand did not fix
anything for Lauren. Beaten was adamant the killing of the
girls was altruistic in motive and refuted suggestions the concept

(54:36):
was introduced to her client and used to create a defense.
She said she viewed the world, including New Zealand, as
dangerous for her children. She saw this phellicide suicide as
a way out for her and the children. She didn't
want to leave the children behind, and she believed, in
her depressed state also that her children were a burden
on her husband, that they'd all be better off dead.

(54:59):
Of course this is isn't true, and it's completely awful,
but Lauren Dickerson was so convinced of this. She was
not someone who snapped in anger. This awful event never
would have happened if Lauren Dickerson was not depressed, and
if she'd been treated for her depression, things might have
been very different. She decided to kill herself and also

(55:19):
the girls, and I suggest that's because she was so
delusional and so disordered in her thinking, but in her mind,
it was the morally right thing to do. Finally, Lauren
Dickison never abused her children, never neglected them. She was
a loving mother. She was severely depressed, so depressed she
was suicidal and thought it was right to kill her children.

(55:42):
She tucked them into bed, she told them she loved
them one last time. The closing addresses were finished by
five pm on Friday, August eleven, twenty twenty three. The
jury was sent home for the weekend, and at ten
am on Monday, Justice cam and Manda gave his summary
of the case. He explained in extensive detail what the

(56:03):
jury had to decide after assessing all of the evidence
they had heard over five weeks, they had four options
for a verdict. One Lauren was guilty of murder. Two
Lauren was guilty of the lesser alternative charge of infanticide.
Three the act of murder was proven, but Lauren was
not guilty by reason of insanity. And four the act

(56:25):
of infanticide was proven but Lauren was not guilty by
reason of insanity. At one fifty five p m. The
jury was sent to begin deliberating. When that happens, the
rest of the courtroom enters a state of limbo. The
defendant is taken to a holding sale, the judge goes
to their chambers. The lawyers retreat to private rooms within

(56:46):
the court house. They're expected to remain close so when
the jury have a question or a verdict, they can
get back to the courtroom quickly. The only people left
in the courtroom are the registrar, the court staff for
who oversees the jury, and the media. It's a strange
time waiting for a verdict. In some courts, the jury
knock on a door. In Lawren's case, they used a

(57:07):
doorbell style system. The energy in the courtroom is one
of nervous, anticipation and often impatience. Every hour that passes
that energy becomes more palpable. The only time you can
really relax is when the jury take a break from
deliberations for lunch or walk outside, which is supervised by
the court staffer, and at the end of the day

(57:28):
when they're sent home. There's no way of predicting how
long a jury can take. The Dickerson jury deliberated until
five pm on the first day, then they went home.
They deliberated all of the next day. On the third day,
shortly before three pm, the jury bell rang. Within a
few minutes, everyone was back in court and the jury

(57:50):
were let in. They didn't have a verdict, but a question.
They told Justice Manda they could not reach a unanimous verdict,
that they were close, but they couldn't all agree. Justice
Smander advised he would accept a majority verdict, meaning if
all but one of them agreed, their decision would stand.

(58:10):
The twelve returned to the jury room, and just two
or three minutes later, the bell rang again. A verdict
had been reached. Everyone reassembled in the courtroom, including Lauren's parents.
Court staff placed extra tissues out along the jury bench,
Lauren's mother sat in the front row of the public gallery, crying.

(58:31):
Justice Mander directed the registrar to put each charge to
the jury and ask if they found Lauren guilty or
not guilty for the murder of Leonae. The four person
replied guilty for the murder of Carla, guilty for the
murder of Maya guilty. Lauren began to cry. Her lawyers

(58:51):
were clearly stunned, winded almost by the verdict. The prosecutor
sat in front of them, digesting the words they heard.
Ausmanda thanked the jury for their service. He said, you've
had to deal with distressing evidence, and I acknowledge that
this trial has likely taken a toll on you personally.
He sent the jury home for the last time, then

(59:12):
turned to his next task, arranging sentencing for the newly
convicted triple murderer. Justice Manda requested a number of specialist
reports about Lauren's mental health and psychiatric care. He acknowledged
that commissioning and completing the reports would be a lengthy
process and that both terms of lawyers would need significant
time to prepare their own submissions. He reminded Lauren back

(59:34):
to the Secure Mental Health unit to await her final
court date. After Lauren was taken away, her lawyers broke
down in tears. The prosecutors offered words of comfort. While
their prosecution was successful, they and everyone else in court
agreed there were no winners. That day, outside court, Detective

(59:55):
Inspector Scott Anderson spoke to The Herald and other media.
He said, words cannot begin to express the tragic circumstances
of this investigation. Police extend our deepest sympathies to the
families who will never get to see Leone Meyer and
Karla grow up and live their lives. I would like
to acknowledge the Dickerson and Fawkes families who have assisted

(01:00:16):
us throughout our investigation. I also want to take this
opportunity to acknowledge the hard work and dedication of the
investigation team. This has been a challenging and complex investigation.
Right from attending the scene on the night to the
completion of the trial, and through it all of our
staff have worked diligently with professionalism and empathy to bring

(01:00:37):
this matter to its conclusion. Our heartfelt thanks also to
the Timudu community and partner agencies who have continued to
provide support to the families. During this case, Lauren's parents,
through her lawyers, also made a statement. They said, postpartum
depression is a terrible thing, as has been shown by
what happened to our family. This was not our daughter,

(01:01:00):
but a debilitating mental illness which resulted in an awful tragedy,
the details of which you and are well aware. Our
beloved Leonae, Khala and Maya were taken from this life
to another as a result of this crippling disease. There
are no winners in this tragedy. We would like to
encourage families and individuals around the world to be aware

(01:01:22):
of the symptoms of postpartum depression as early as possible,
both for yourselves as well as close family and friends
around you. If treated early and managed correctly, people can
experience a full recovery. The person experiencing depression and those
closer to them may not be able to recognize the
signs or how serious postpartum depression can become. Almost a

(01:01:44):
year passed before Lauren's sentencing went ahead. A number of
dates were set but vacated due to various reports not
being complete or more expert input being sought. On June
twenty sixth, twenty twenty four, Lauren was back in the
High Court at christ Church before Justice Amanda, Her parents
and another relative returned to christ Church to attend and

(01:02:04):
support her. Graham and his family stayed home, attending the
hearing by audio visual link. The hearing began with the
reading of victim impact statements. The Dickinson family statements were
read by a support person. Graham's was first. Here is
part of what he wrote.

Speaker 6 (01:02:23):
Losing all three lovely girls has had an immense impact
on my life, Lauren's life, and the lives of our
family members and friends. Due to the attention and interest
in the media as well as various social media platforms,
this tragedy has impacted people around the world. People all
over the world were in shock and disbelief and for

(01:02:44):
many life will never be the same. After the sixteenth
of September twenty twenty one, my life as I knew
it immediately ground.

Speaker 5 (01:02:53):
To a halt.

Speaker 6 (01:02:54):
This included my life and role as a husband and father.
It also included my prospects as an orthopedic surgeon in
Ti Marie, New Zealand, and building a life of my family,
which we were much looking forward to. We have planned
this immigration and thought about all the related life changes
and sacrifices, but also the possibilities and opportunities not just

(01:03:18):
for ourselves but also for our children. We were aware
of what we were giving up and leaving behind in
South Africa, but after a lot of consideration and clear thinking,
we picked up our lives and moved to New Zealand.
I have been grieving the loss of my three daughters
ever since. I have witnessed my family, as well as
laurence family, grieving our loss, all individually going through various

(01:03:43):
stages of grief and disbelief. Never could we have imagined
having to deal and get through a situation like this.
It is obvious that this tragedy has changed my life forever,
as well as the lives of many other people. With
regards to my own life, I have not only lost
my life with my children, but also my life with

(01:04:03):
my wife Lauren. I will not see them turning into
beautiful young women and subsequently finding their own husbands and
starting their own families, and of course all prospects of
having grandchildren of my own is.

Speaker 5 (01:04:16):
Also lost forever.

Speaker 6 (01:04:18):
I have had to make peace with this and with
the help of a loving family and friends, and a
lot of prayers from amazing people, I have managed to
accept my current situation and position in life. I have
no doubt that Lauren Dickison had a rapid deterioration in
her mental health in the days leading up to this event.
She will have to live with the knowledge of what

(01:04:39):
she has done for the rest of her life. Her
punishment is already severe and her life will never be
the same. I hold no unforgiveness or anger towards Lauren.
I wish her the best in terms of her health
and well being. My hope is for her to have
the best in terms of treatment and care physically and me.

(01:05:01):
Of course, the real victims are Lean, Karla and Maya.
We will think of them every day, missed them always,
and love them forever until we see them again.

Speaker 1 (01:05:12):
At the end of his statement, Graham wished his wife
the best and said he hopes she received the best
care for her mental health possible. He said his biggest
fear was that she would self harm and hoped she
had a safe space to heal and recover in New Zealand.
The statement from Graham's mother Betty was read next.

Speaker 6 (01:05:30):
But in all honesty, I don't have the words of
vocabulary to accurately describe the pain this is brought on
me and my family. I am a seventy eight year
old grandmother who once had ted grandchildren and now have seven,
who once trusted someone, took someone into my home, loved
someone who was now a convicted murderer. Some days it

(01:05:53):
feels simply unbelievable, like I'm living in some horror film
that I won't be able to wake up from. But
it's true and now part of my day to day reality,
and there is no escaping the pain.

Speaker 5 (01:06:07):
It cuts through me every day.

Speaker 6 (01:06:08):
It numbs me. It makes me want to cruel under
the covers and never come out again. Life won't be
the same again. The pain won't go away, but the
sun will rise again tomorrow and the world will get
on with the business of another day, and.

Speaker 5 (01:06:23):
So will I.

Speaker 1 (01:06:25):
Graham's three sisters also wrote statements. Hermion said her heart
was ripped out of her chest when the girls died,
and she still could not make sense of what happened.
She said the girls represented life and love and brought
sunshine to the family. Now that family was shrouded in
a dreadful sadness. We long for them every day they
are gone far too soon, She said, We've lost a

(01:06:48):
sister in law, one we thought loved us all, but
through the messages that we read in court, I realized
we didn't know her as much as we thought we did.
We can only hope that the grief will ease sometime
and are memories of the girls will never fade. Our
loss is not imaginable. Lauren was their mother. She was
supposed to love and care for them. Graham's second sister, Elizabeth,

(01:07:10):
was scathing of Lauren cutting all ties with the woman.
At the end of her statement, she said she often
thought about the girl's final moments, how afraid they must
have been, their disbelief at the betrayal by their own mother.
She said, I lay there wondering what Lauren had done,
images of their lifeless little bodies in my head, even
though it hurt to imagine what they must be going through.

(01:07:33):
When the gruesome details of the murders came out in court,
the family were shocked. Elizabeth said Lauren gave no consideration
for the consequences of her actions, and she did not
care about the pain and hurt she was causing. She
took the lives of three innocent little babies who loved
her and who trusted her to look after them, protect them.

(01:07:53):
They didn't choose her, She chose them, and then she
chose to end at all. She finished wish by speaking
directly to Lauren. She said, perhaps it's now time to
draw a line. There isn't much more to be said.
What's done is done. I would urge you to focus
on getting better, serve your time, and make plans for
your life. After that, it's time to cut those strings

(01:08:16):
and let Graham go. There is nothing that binds us.
I forgive you, but for now it's time to say goodbye.
Graham's third sister, Cecilia, came to New Zealand to support him.
After the girls died, she revealed a private funeral was
held and the children were cremated so their remains could
be taken home to South Africa. Cecilia said, the cremation

(01:08:40):
just broke my heart. Our beautiful nieces were reduced to
so little. There were difficult days. I heard my brother
cry in the shower, I saw him become quieter. There
were no words to describe the feeling of loss. It'd
be nice to hear Lauren apologize for her actions. I
do not feel hatred towards life Laren. I feel a

(01:09:01):
deep disappointment and sadness. A close relative of Lauren spoke next.
Her name has been permanently suppressed and we were not
allowed to record her voice, but we could report her statement.
She said, we love her unconditionally and always will. What
happened that night could not have been at the hands
of the Lauren that we all know so well. She

(01:09:22):
was so nurturing over those three girls and loved them
more than anything in this entire world. When we got
the news, we thought of every other possible cause of death,
a car accident, accidental poisoning, a home invasion, which is
not uncommon in South Africa, anything other than Lauren playing
a role, because that was not even an option in
our minds. She said her family had suffered a staggering

(01:09:45):
loss that would never be mitigated by Lauren receiving a
harsh sentence. She told the court to the contrary, the
harsher the sentence that is imposed on Lauren, the greater
our loss becomes. We've forgiven Lauren. We seek no retribution
or penalty against her. She has already paid the highest
price for her mental illness and she will continue to
pay the price for however long she lives. At times,

(01:10:08):
we are still in disbelief that the girls are gone
and that our loving Lauren, empathetic in all ways, could
have done it. We regret not realizing the significance of
Lauren's depression and that her postpartum depression lasted for years
after the girl's birth. If only we'd known, we could
have stepped in and supported her immediately tried to get
her the help she needed. The woman then criticized a

(01:10:30):
number of people and agencies. She was disappointed and angry
with Laurence doctor in South Africa, claiming he did not
take proper care of her. She said, We're angry with
the New Zealand government for such strict MiQ rules, even
for families of five with small children who are used
to running a round in South African gardens, having ample
space to move around and run freely. We're angry that

(01:10:53):
the New Zealand government insisted on a specialist appointment and
letters for Lauren's mental health and Carla's cliff lip with
an a week of them arriving in a new country.
If a country knew a person was struggling, surely support
structures rather than tech boxes, should have been put in place.
The woman's biggest loss was that of Lauren. She said.

(01:11:13):
We miss her loving nature, the care that she showed
to all those around her, the empathy she showed to
other women. We believe the greatest victim in this whole
situation is actually Lauren herself. We can confidently tell you
how much she loved those three girls, and that she
could not have possibly been in her right mind when
the incident occurred. She has told us on countless occasions

(01:11:35):
and telephone conversations and emails that she wishes she could
go back to that day and that things will be different.
She misses the girls more than anyone in this world,
and she's already endured so much. We do not feel
that a harsh sentence will help in any way restore
the hearts and souls of those affected, and if anything,
it simply perpetuates the hurt and prolongs the grief. Lauren's father,

(01:11:58):
Malcolm Fawkes, was last to space. He was also critical
of authorities involved in the immigration and others connected to
the family. Here's what he read to Justice Manda at
the sentencing hearing.

Speaker 7 (01:12:10):
Naturally, our whole family was devastated by what happened to
the three precious little girls and to our daughter Lauren.

Speaker 5 (01:12:18):
To have caused this whole tragic saga. We have forgiven
her that are obviously is.

Speaker 7 (01:12:24):
Still struggling to understand the maternal mental health issues which
caused this tragedy. It is extremely technical and complex for
us as average people in the street. We are not
forensic psychiatrists nor psychologists. All we know is the simple

(01:12:45):
statement nobody in their right.

Speaker 5 (01:12:48):
Mind would have done something like that.

Speaker 7 (01:12:51):
We are angry with ourselves for not recognizing the chronic
mental health challenges Lauren had and for not getting the nesty.

Speaker 5 (01:13:00):
Helped for her.

Speaker 7 (01:13:02):
We did not know about her ideations of harming the children,
a classical symptom of firstpartum depression. We did not know
of the turmoil continually churning inside a lonely Lauren.

Speaker 5 (01:13:16):
While she put on a grave face.

Speaker 7 (01:13:18):
Especially as a medical doctor, we are disappointed that Lauren
does not appear to have been correctly diagnosed, treated and
managed in South Africa for her mental health problems. We
are disappointed with the medical fraternity for a lion Lauren
to have seventeen IVF treatments with our psychological counseling even

(01:13:44):
though they could afford it, and because she wanted children
so badly. We are disappointed with the Medical Association of
South Africa. Why do they allow doctors to self medicate?
We are disappointed with the Astan and New Zealand Medical Associations.
Why did that take six months to approve grand certification

(01:14:07):
as an author tedic specialist surgeon instead of the average
and promised six weeks. We were disappointed with the government here.
Why did you repose such inhuman m i Q requirements
on essential service people and others in general who are

(01:14:28):
saying that Lauren was left on her own the might
of the terrible tragedy when the aviations remain about and
that she was severely mentally ill. We are disappointed with
the government Immigration ministry. Why did you insist on Lauren
having to submit reports on her mental condition and Carl

(01:14:51):
his clerk lip within a week of arriving. Why did
you not proactively warn to Marou that a person with
mental health challenges were approaching and set up appropriate care
and support systems proactively to help her on arrival.

Speaker 5 (01:15:09):
We are upset with.

Speaker 7 (01:15:10):
The officials or individuals who released her name and children's
name for the whole world to see the very next morning.
There should have been named suppression due to the age
of the children at least.

Speaker 5 (01:15:23):
We are very upset that.

Speaker 7 (01:15:25):
The DVD of the interigation of Lauren, within a few
hours of a discharge from hospital was allowed in court.
So the loss to us has been huge. It has
left a big vacuum in our lives which cannot be
filled completely by the other five little grandchildren children we
have in South Africa. We are not saying that Lauren

(01:15:47):
was totally blameless, but she has lost everything and also
tried to take her own life.

Speaker 5 (01:15:53):
In the process.

Speaker 7 (01:15:54):
She will possibly and probably lose her husband as well.
She has already been punished in full by her disease
and by herself. She has been punished enough already. She
has lost everything as her husband and how many conversations
with her the past thirty three years, with a face

(01:16:17):
to face or via email or telephone, she has expressed remorse, grief,
shame and incredulity over what has happened. She has to
live with what has happened for the rest of her life.

Speaker 1 (01:16:58):
Justice Amanda turned to the legal teams asking them to
make final submissions on what they thought the appropriate sentence
should be. In the lead up to a sentencing, the
judges provided with full submissions from each side, including any
expert opinion or reports, and any additional reports they've ordered.
Judges just don't turn up on the day and make
a decision. They assess and consider a significant amount of

(01:17:20):
material and the lead up to a hearing. Like laurence trial,
her sentencing was intense and complex. I'm summarizing it in
this podcast episode, but if you want to find out
more you can do so on enzid Herald dot co
dot nz. I will include links to my reporting and
the judges final sentencing remarks and the show notes. Crown
Prosecutor Andrew McCrae told the court that a life sentence

(01:17:43):
with a starting point of twenty four to twenty five
years minimum non parole was appropriate in Lauren's case. However,
he acknowledged her mental illness and accepted a generous credit
of around thirty percent should be applied. He said a
life sentence with a minimum term of at least seventeen
or eighteen years was needed and would not be manifestly unjust.

(01:18:03):
The court needs to take into account the circumstances of
the offense and the circumstances of the offender. He said
this was very serious offending that warrant's consideration of that
minimum non parole period. It cannot be doubted that any
sentence will be difficult for Lauren. It is mitigated somewhat
by the location that she will likely spend her sentence.

(01:18:24):
McCrae said the sentence must denounce Lauren's offending and deter
others from similar offending in future. A mother has killed
her three young children, he said. The Crown's position is
that while the defendant was suffering from a major depressive
disorder at the time, that it was her anger or
frustration at the children's behavior on the evening of the
offending and in need for control that was the actual, core,

(01:18:48):
isolated moment. There was a simple loss of control. Her
depressive disorder resulted essentially in her failure to be able
to cope with the behavior of the children on the
night Lauren's where Karen Beaton said there had not been
a case in New Zealand to date where a parent
was convicted of murdering three children. The only comparable case

(01:19:08):
was that of Bruce House, who was jailed for the
murders of his stepdaughters. You can hear about that case
in a previous episode of A Moment in Crime. Beaton
suggested a starting point of twenty two years minimum non parole,
with a significant discount for mental health. She commended the
Crown's suggestion, but hoped for at least a credit of
forty percent to reflect laurence state of mind. She said

(01:19:32):
Lauren's deep remorse also needed to be considered, and revealed
that the convicted murderer had written a letter to Justice
Amander outlining that she said she remains mentally unwell, she
is mentally disordered, but describing her as having a lack
of insight into what she did, I suggest is wrong.
She was clearly unwell at the time, but also she

(01:19:52):
had not recovered from postpartum depression. She was desolate, she
was in despair, She was very unwell, she was experiencing
cognitive impairment, she was clearly suicidal, and she acted exceptionally
out of character. Justice Amanda had a lot to consider.
Under New Zealand's Sentencing Act, a person must be sentenced

(01:20:13):
to life imprisonment unless the circumstances of the offense and
the offender mean that imprisonment for life would be manifestly unjust.
He said. Ordinarily the murder of three children would point
away from a life sentence being manifestly unjust, but he
had to consider the killer's mental health along with that.
In this case, the formal part of the sentencing was

(01:20:34):
lengthy and complex. The case was unprecedented, and Justice Amander
had to consider so many aspects before making his final call.
His sentencing notes actually spanned twenty five pages. This is
him in court on the day, explaining part of his
decision making process.

Speaker 8 (01:20:52):
I consider your reactions to such stressors where the product
will manifestation of your psychiatric condition, which rendered you unable
to cope or to get through another day. It was
in that state of spare and sense of hopelessness, a
state of altered reality and emotional numbness, that you killed
the children. I do not consider your actions can be

(01:21:16):
meaningfully separated from your psychiatric state at the time, and
that there existed a strong causal nexus, Unlike in many,
if not most, cases where mental illness has played its part.
I consider your severe depression dominated your reasoning process, such
as it was, and that the appalling murders, as I

(01:21:37):
have already observed, have to be viewed in the context
of the cognitive distortion and impaired judgment from which you
were suffering at the time, which not just contributed your
actions but drove them. There is no suggestion that you
have any propensity for violence, and I have concluded the
offending would not have occurred.

Speaker 5 (01:21:57):
But for your psychiatric state.

Speaker 8 (01:22:00):
These factors have previously been held as pointing in favor
of finding a sentence of life imprisonment to be manifestly unjust,
notwithstanding the fact a defense of insanity was unavailable. I
consider the operative extent of your mental impairment on your
offending cannot be adequately recognized by an adjustment to any

(01:22:21):
minimum period of imprisonment that may otherwise have been imposed,
and that in the circumstances the imposition of life imprisonment
would be manifestly unjust. In reaching that decision, I am
mindful of the risk of undervaluing the sanctity of human life,
and in particular value of these little children's lives that

(01:22:45):
were only just beginning. I am also wary of paying
insufficient regard to their vulnerability and the gross.

Speaker 5 (01:22:53):
Breach of trust that their deaths represent.

Speaker 8 (01:22:57):
The fact that not one, but three young lives were
taken has been impressed upon me by the Crown and
is impossible to ignore. The circumstances of the murders are
truly appalling. However, I do not consider this is a
case limited to an offender acting while in a vulnerable
psychological state. Rather, this offending involved a mother who was

(01:23:21):
afflicted with a disease of the mind that was causative
of her actions.

Speaker 5 (01:23:27):
There is no.

Speaker 8 (01:23:28):
Suggestion you are a risk to the community or that
there are any public safety considerations that can be a
highly relevant factor when dealing with offenders with psychiatric conditions
that present a heightened risk of danger and raise the
need for the type of extended supervision that accompanies an
indeterminate life sentence. This is a case that involves a

(01:23:51):
conspiracy of circumstances which is difficult to see being replicated.
Some issue has been taken by the Crown With your
state of remark, however, I do not consider you other than.

Speaker 5 (01:24:03):
Deeply regretful about what occurred.

Speaker 8 (01:24:06):
You struggle with how badly you have hurt him, and
are horrified at the pain, trauma and distress your actions
have caused. You have expressed to me how horrified you
are at being responsible for the deaths of your three
beautiful girls. I do not consider any question arises as

(01:24:27):
to your genuine remorse. Missus Dickerson, will you please now
stand for the murder of each of your three daughters, Leone,
Karla and Meyer. You are sentenced to eighteen years in prison.
Those sentences are to be served Concurrently, there will be

(01:24:49):
an order pursuit to Section thirty four one a one
of the Criminal Procedure Mentally Impaired Persons Act, that you
be detained in a hospital as a special patient under
the MA Mental Health Compulsory Assessment and Treatment Act. It
will be for the relevant medical authorities to determine when
you may be fit to be transferred to prison.

Speaker 5 (01:25:11):
You may stand out.

Speaker 1 (01:25:12):
Soon after sentencing, Lauren issued a statement through her lawyers.
It was the first time she had addressed her offending publicly.
This is her full statement, voiced by an actor.

Speaker 4 (01:25:24):
I loved Leane, Maya and Karla with all my heart.
I failed them, I failed Graham, and I failed our families.
I take responsibility for taking our three beautiful girls from
this world. I would like to take this opportunity to
convey the deepest and most sincere remorse for the extreme

(01:25:44):
pain in hurt caused to my children and my family
by my actions. No apology will ever be enough, and
words will seem hollow to many. I want people to
know our girls brought me so much joy and were
the center of my world. I am horrified by my
actions and the pain, distress, and trauma I have caused

(01:26:06):
everyone who loved them. Like many others, I miss them
every single day. I continue to undergo treatment for severe
mental illness, and I owe it to everyone and myself
to get mentally healthier. I will do whatever it takes,
although I know that will never change the past. My
family and I want people to know about the risks,

(01:26:29):
warning signs, and extreme impacts of postpartum depression. We urge
other families to look for and act on unhealthy signs.
We urge women experiencing the symptoms of postpartum depression to
tell the ones they love this pain and heartbreak cannot
happen to any other families. I would like to thank

(01:26:49):
the many people from around the world who have shown
support to us. Your care and grace have provided us
with warmth in our darkest despair.

Speaker 1 (01:27:00):
Dickison will remain at Halmoorton Hospital until such time as
she is deemed well enough to be moved to an
appropriate prison or released. Her release can only be approved
by the Minister of Health or the National Director of
Mental Health, and only when thou satisfied Lauren is no
longer a risk to herself or others. The Special Patient
order is indefinite. There is no minimumal maximum time for

(01:27:22):
a person to be detained. At the time of sentencing,
she was still under twenty four to seven monitoring, taking
powerful medication, and seeing a range of doctors and psychiatrists.
She is able to have contact with her family weekly
by phone or video call, and she's often sent care
packages by supporters. In fact, days after she was sentenced,

(01:27:42):
Lauren managed to get a message to some of those supporters,
which was published on a Facebook page. Here is what
she said in that note.

Speaker 4 (01:27:50):
Justice Amanda heard me. His decision is fair and just.
Thank you all for your love and support of the
last year. Thank you, thank you for believing my version
of events that I am not an angry, jealous and
selfish person, but rather a mother suffering from a severe
mental illness. While trying to raise my three beautiful little

(01:28:12):
girls and supporting my husband in all his endeavors. I
believe you can have it all, just not all at once.
Be kind to yourselves and talk until someone hears you.
Do not be ashamed to admit if you can't cope.
There is a way out which doesn't have to end
in tragedy.

Speaker 1 (01:28:31):
Because Lauren's sentence is finite, she is eligible for parole
after serving one third. Given the time she had already
been detained by her sentencing date, she can appear before
the parole board in less than three years. Immigration New
Zealand will then decide whether a deportation order is served,
removing the triple killer from the country. A coroner has

(01:28:52):
confirmed that an inquest will also be held into the
deaths of Leone, Khala and Maya. The inquest will aim
to highlight any failings or shortcome and the Dickinson's immigration
process and healthcare, among other things. I intend covering those
proceedings in future, and they'll be reported in full on
ENSI Herald dot co dot INZ. It's fair to say

(01:29:12):
Lauren's trial was by far the most grueling I have
ever covered. Hearing about the deaths of three little girls
in graphic detail, some which was permanently suppressed, was hard.
The days in court were heavy, both in terms of
the amount of information and the nature of it. Some
days were heavy on an emotional level. It was really

(01:29:32):
hard to listen to the various narrations of what happened
to the girls, how they were found, and ultimately how
their murders could have been avoided. There just seemed to
be so many opportunities for various people to help Lauren
or intervene. I think what haunted me the most was
the wadifs how easily the children could still be here,
alive and happy, if warning signs and red flags weren't hidden, missed,

(01:29:55):
or overlooked. In saying this, I'm not criticizing or blaming anyone.
Nobody knew how unwhile Lauren was until it was too late.
But there were just so many points in the timeline
of this tragedy where a different conversation, decision, or action
could have changed the outcome. We journalists are not teflon
the terrible things we hear in courts. Don't just slide

(01:30:17):
off our shoulders when we go home each day. Between
our number there were tears, sleepless nights, nightmares. We got
personal hate mail and complaints to our editors about the coverage.
We were constantly bombarded with questions and opinions of other
people who had little knowledge of the case beyond the headlines.
It was exhausting and draining, but we were all committed

(01:30:38):
to doing our job, accurate and balanced storytelling, being the
eyes and ears of the public in a courtroom, being
a voice for the voiceless, and in this case, the
voiceless were little Leanee Maya and Carla Dickerson. It's really
important for me to finish this episode with a proper
tribute to the little girls. A few weeks after the murders,

(01:31:00):
Lauren's brother reached out to me by email. He didn't
want to speak in depth about what had happened to
his nieces, but shared a number of photos taking at
a celebration of their lives earlier that day. The gathering
was held in Pretoria at a public park. It was
organized more for close friends and family, but some members
of the community attended. We love them and we will

(01:31:21):
always love them, Lauren's brother said. He sent three images
to me of enlarged photos of Leonae Meyer and Carla
lined up in a grassy area near a small pond.
The photos bore the children's names and a description of
each of them. Leonnaise read a beautiful little girl inside
and out. You were such a chatterbox with an infectious laugh.

(01:31:42):
You loved cuddles. You enjoyed baking, even though you ate
a lot of the mixture before it was baked. You
were so creative and loved your stickers and sparkles. You
were kind and always cared deeply for those around you.

Speaker 5 (01:31:56):
You were a.

Speaker 1 (01:31:56):
Loving sister with a soft heart. Carla was described as
a beautiful little girl who was feisty, independent and strong,
yet kind and caring. Her photo caption read, you loved
a cuddle and you loved early mornings. Your smile left
an impact on each person that met you. You were

(01:32:17):
such a cheerful and happy little soul. Your little personality
was contagious. And then Maya, a beautiful, gentle little girl
who was always smiling and a real charmer who knew
just what looked to give us to get one more sweetie,
playful to the core, so happy and cheerful. You loved

(01:32:37):
tea parties and perfected the pinky finger A Moment in
Crime is an enzed Me podcast written and hosted by
me Annalisk, senior crime and Justice reporter for The New
Zealand Herald. This episode was produced by Myself podcast production

(01:33:00):
Ethan Selves and Liam McDonald from the nzedme sound and
vision team.

Speaker 2 (01:33:04):
Thanks to my colleagues Emily Anstell and Blake Benny at
news Talk was vb for voicing the words of Lauren
and Graham Dickerson.

Speaker 1 (01:33:12):
Since Leonemeyer and Karla Dickerson were.

Speaker 2 (01:33:14):
Killed, so much of the focus has been on their mother,
But this is their story and it's so important to
remember the three little children at the center of this tragedy.
If you are worried about yourself or someone else, please
set the show notes for information on where to get help,
and please ask for help. There is always someone who
will listen, and always someone to support you when you're

(01:33:36):
unwell or struggling.

Speaker 1 (01:33:38):
Episodes of A Moment in Crime are usually released monthly
on enzied herold dot co, dot zed iHeartRadio, and your
usual podcast apps. If you have a crime or case
you'd like me to consider covering, email Anna dot leask
at enzedme dot co dot zed

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The Dickason Family Tragedy - Part Two: Very Sick or Very Wicked?

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.css-14f5ked{margin:0;word-break:break-word;display:-webkit-box;-webkit-box-orient:vertical;box-orient:vertical;-webkit-line-clamp:2;overflow:hidden;}The Dickason Family Tragedy - Part Two: Very Sick or Very Wicked?