February 9, 2025 • 40 mins
The journey into motherhood can be complicated, and looks completely different for everyone. That's why this week Toni is chatting with former heptathlete and mother of two Sarah Cowley-Ross about her experience in the Fourth Trimester of pregnancy, and what she did to prepare for the difficult first months of motherhood.
This episode is brought to you by Contact Energy's Fourth Trimester
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
We need to Talk Conversations on wellness with co cfm's
Tony Street.
Speaker 2 (00:06):
Hello, welcome to we need to talk today. We're talking
about the fourth trimester of parenthood, those precious months after
your baby is born, when you're adjusting to having a
newborn in the house, You're finding a new routine, potentially
going back to work, all while your body recovers from
the birth. It's a full on time that can be
a blur and something you might not fully reflect on
(00:26):
until your kids are a bit older. I'm at that
point now that my youngest of three children is six.
Today's episode is brought to us by Contact Energy. Since
twenty twenty two, Contact Energy has given three months of
free energy to nearly four thousand Kiwi families with newborns.
This money has been used on many things to make
those first precious months a little easier, like buying a
(00:47):
new pram, flying Nanna up for extra support, or giving
dads more time off work to be with their little one.
Contact Energy is making it good to be home for
our newest New Zealanders, which I think is pretty cool.
Allie Ross has been through this twice, first with Max
now aged nine, and then.
Speaker 3 (01:04):
With Poppy, who was six.
Speaker 2 (01:05):
Sarah is a former New Zealand heptathlete turned mother of two.
She's a wellness advocate and sports presenter. Sarah and I
hosted the twenty ten Tokyo Olympics together for TVNZ. Her
athletics career spanned fifteen years. She was New Zealand's high
jump and heptathlon champion and attended numerous World Championships, Olympics
and the Commonwealth Games. Sarah is also a qualified physiotherapist
(01:29):
and columnist for The Locker Room. We were just saying,
it is a while ago that you gave birth and
had that sort of fourth trimester period, but for you
quite unique, because when you're an athlete, that must throw
up a whole sort of different realm of considerations.
Speaker 1 (01:46):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (01:47):
I think that for me, when you know we are
pregnant with Max, it was like, oh wow, this is great.
But it was during the time where I was transitioning
from finishing elite sport.
Speaker 1 (02:01):
To you know, real world really.
Speaker 4 (02:04):
And so that transition was pretty confronting for me, I
have to say, because I'd gone from I did hit
tath on for the majority of my athletics career, but
for the final two years I did high jump, and
high jumper's body does not look like a pregnant woman's body.
So it was just this real, stark and quite abrupt
(02:29):
transition for me, which was in some ways good, I think,
because it was like, okay, right, you really need to
roll with this, but it also made it, you know,
really challenging as well.
Speaker 3 (02:42):
How did you cope with that?
Speaker 2 (02:43):
Like, when your body started changing, was it okay?
Speaker 1 (02:47):
No? I did not like it.
Speaker 4 (02:48):
I did not like it because it was a lot
of change, not only like physically but mentally trying to
be like I'm cool with this, but I'm really not.
And and during that time, I think any transition can
be a little bit sticky, no matter where whatever it is.
But I think I was going from being an individual
(03:12):
athlete where everything was really focused on me quite selfishly,
to actually, I need to really take care of my
body to grow this little human inside me. And I
wasn't an experience which I initially was comfortable with. Actually
(03:34):
probably it was not comfortable with it the whole time,
but I learned to over time accept it and kind
of embrace it.
Speaker 2 (03:42):
Yeah, it's interesting you talk about the time that that
all happened because I feel like there's never really a
right time to have a child, right and often when
it's your first child, you are changing most people from
a career into quite a different phase of your life.
And if you're intending to keep going with your career,
then what is that look like?
Speaker 3 (04:00):
And you want to try and plan it while you're.
Speaker 2 (04:02):
Pregnant, but you actually don't know how you're going to
react once the baby comes either.
Speaker 4 (04:06):
No, I had no idea, And you know, if you
ask anyone honestly, hopefully they'll give you an honest answer
and say, I actually had no idea as well. You
can put all the plans in place, but you don't
know what kind of baby you're going to have, You
don't know what kind of parents you're going to be,
And so I think that that transition of actually mindset
as well is really something that I hadn't considered, and
(04:31):
so that in itself was actually quite challenging as well.
To go. I like having a plan. I like being
organized and just being like, oh my goodness, what the
heck is going on here?
Speaker 3 (04:44):
What to be doing?
Speaker 2 (04:45):
So the plan that you had once you got pregnant
on how you were going to transition with your career.
Did that follow the plan that you had or did
you have to change that.
Speaker 4 (04:55):
I probably didn't have as quite structed plan as I
thought I was. It was in a time where I
was actually dedicated so much of my life to being
an athlete, and it was actually, oh, this is a
time where I'm going to, like you say, progress my career.
And then it was just like, oh, I felt like
the brakes were on because I was just kind of
(05:16):
getting my dipping my toes into it.
Speaker 1 (05:18):
But actually that was fine.
Speaker 4 (05:20):
I actually realized during that time what I wanted to
kind of do. The pause gave me more clarity around, Okay,
I don't want to be at a desk twenty four
to seven. I need variety. I need to be doing
things with people. I need to be doing things which
create impact or give value to the world. And so
(05:46):
that became clearer on reflection. Probably at the time I thought, oh,
my gosh, I have no idea what the heck is
going on.
Speaker 3 (05:55):
Probably still do, but it.
Speaker 1 (05:58):
Was, in hindsight, a good time to stop.
Speaker 2 (06:01):
Yeah and see. For me, I had the exact opposite experience.
So when I got pregnant with Juliet, who's now twelve,
I was a full on sports reporter, you know, traveling
around the country for one News. I was hosting Netbull
at the time, and my plan was I am going
to stop and I'm going to have a complete year off,
(06:22):
and then on my due dates, I got asked to
meet with the bosses and offered the breakfast presenting position.
But the catch was that was on October third, because
my daughter was born on October fourth, and I had
to start in the January.
Speaker 3 (06:37):
So suddenly I had gone from this pan of I'm going.
Speaker 2 (06:40):
To have a year off, just be at home join
my baby, and then suddenly it was like, no, I'm
having to prepare for this major acceleration in my career,
getting up at three point thirty in the morning, and
this is happening when.
Speaker 3 (06:53):
My baby's twelve weeks old.
Speaker 1 (06:55):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (06:55):
And I remember having to decide whether I could do that, yeah,
without having the baby yet.
Speaker 3 (07:01):
Yes, And I don't know how you do that.
Speaker 2 (07:03):
And I remember saying to them, I think I can
do it, but I don't know what it's going to
be like.
Speaker 3 (07:09):
I don't know whether I'm going to get a colicky baby.
Speaker 2 (07:11):
I want my baby to be healthy first of all,
Am I going to get postnatal depression? Am I going
to feel confident enough to get back on the telly
twelve weeks later?
Speaker 3 (07:19):
I don't know?
Speaker 2 (07:21):
And then the reality was I did manage it, but
it took it an awful amount of juggling to make
it work.
Speaker 4 (07:26):
Yeah, And I think that's the thing is that, like you,
we're all capable of probably much more than what we think.
That's what I reflect and like I have no doubt that.
I mean, I saw you or incredible and I you know,
behind the scenes, you're saying, how is this woman doing this?
I was crying, I got exactly But you wrap the
(07:47):
support around you and you figure it out, you know.
On reflection, when I was pregnant, I was actually doing
a maternity leave cover, so had gone in to tell
my sponsor, Essex that I was retiring, and then as
a result of that, they said, oh, do you want
to come and work for us? And so I had
this year of working for them on this maternity leave
(08:08):
cover and that I actually got pregnant, and they had
sort of asked if I would come back, but I was.
It sort of was a natural end for me in
that role, and that's when I was able to work
for myself more and do things that around Max initially
and subsequently Poppy. But I think that, you know, we
(08:33):
are capable of much more, but it does come with
supreme organization and also looking after ourselves that we can
keep going.
Speaker 2 (08:45):
You're so right, you need that support, and you need
support in lots of different ways. And one of the
big things that I can reflect on now after having
three children is that just because, like you said, you
might have looked at me and gone, oh my gosh,
you know, her baby's twelve weeks old, how is she
in it tally and how is she managing that? But
(09:05):
the reality is the mom who's at home with their
twelve week old yep, there in those early hours in
the morning, it's probably up anyway, potentially breastfeeding, potentially with
a crying baby. It doesn't mean what I was doing
was necessarily harder. It was just a different type of
heart totally the way you might say easier than dealing
(09:26):
with the baby, you know.
Speaker 4 (09:28):
And I think that one of the things that I'm
really conscious of is comparison, and I think that it
can be the theft of joy because people would say, oh,
you're back working, but they don't see you off camera.
They don't see all the hardships to have to leave
your child, to have to you know, figure it out,
(09:50):
to try and look after yourself or you're looking after
so many other people and fronting the freshing the nation.
And so I think that one of the things that
I was really conscious of is like, I'm going to
do me like we're going to do this, but we're
going to do it in our way because well, first
of them all, when you figure out our way, because
(10:12):
no one gives you this, man, you figure it out.
Speaker 2 (10:15):
And every child is so different as well, totally even
within a family right.
Speaker 4 (10:19):
Exactly, and how you parent one versus the other one.
You hope you're consistent, but you you know, it's the
reality is it's different because the child is different. And
so that comes with you know, care and consideration how
you do that. And I do think, you know, we're
very quick to judge people, we are, and parenting, I
(10:43):
think is one of the biggest things that we judge.
Speaker 2 (10:46):
And I think we're all so quiet, and I know
I was like this, like I was heightened to being
judged as well because in my mind, because I had
a mum, a dairy farming family, so my mum was
home all the time.
Speaker 3 (11:00):
So that's what I want.
Speaker 1 (11:01):
It to be.
Speaker 2 (11:02):
And in reality, I now know that I'm actually better
when I'm doing things and balancing it well. But I
remember thinking, are people going to think if I go
back at twelve weeks that I'm leaving my baby at home,
even though the reality was she was with her dad
and then I was there at eleven o'clock anyway, so
I was quite and you know, there were people. I remember,
people are quite nasty, and there were people that did
(11:23):
judge me for that. But I feel like the same
people will probably judge the mom for what are you
doing with your day?
Speaker 1 (11:29):
You know?
Speaker 3 (11:30):
So I can't really wink, but.
Speaker 1 (11:31):
You can't win.
Speaker 4 (11:32):
So you have to just focus on what's important your family,
and you'll circle around you who are supporting you and
also who are really important to you. And I think
that every motherhood journey or parenthood journey comes with so
many judgments and you'll be given so much advice, So
(11:53):
just be really select of listen, but be conscious of
what advice you take on and who you're taking it from.
Speaker 2 (11:59):
I think you if you trust yourself and your gut
you know what makes your family thrive and what you
need to be a good mum.
Speaker 1 (12:07):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (12:08):
Do you remember what those things were for you when
you had Max and Poppy? Like what the things that
were kind of that gave you joy and made the
house workable.
Speaker 3 (12:16):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (12:17):
So I'm like going that I like to be busy
and that I like to contribute, and I like actually
to feel like I'm doing something so then I come
home and I'm energized.
Speaker 3 (12:27):
Yep.
Speaker 4 (12:28):
And so for me that's important to me, and so
therefore it becomes important to our family unit. I mean,
the other non negotiables for me would be like I
have to be doing something active by no means is
it in comparison to what I used to do. I've
finished with that, and I'm like, right, twenty minutes of
exercise or whatever that will help me be a better
(12:51):
human and that will help me be a better wife,
to be a better teammate, so I can be a
better mum.
Speaker 2 (12:55):
When you had Max, how quickly did you get back
into exercise and what did it look like?
Speaker 4 (13:00):
I had emergency seasons with both the kids, so I
was very conscious of like I need a rest, but
also I need to do something gentle. So I remember
doing just walking for like till he was six six
weeks and he would he would sleep in the pram.
(13:23):
So it was great.
Speaker 3 (13:24):
I feel, oh boy, Max, it.
Speaker 4 (13:26):
Was great actually, and that got me out of the house.
It got the baby sleeping and got me breathing, you know,
fresh air and feeling like I could go and you know,
get my coffee and talk to the cafe lady who
you know, little did she know how much of a
joy she was in my day?
Speaker 3 (13:45):
You know, corrections important.
Speaker 4 (13:47):
Totally, totally, And so I didn't do anything drastic and
I was very slow for me. I wanted to run eventually,
and so I just started like a jog walk kind
of thing. Probably about ten weeks after with clearance, so
(14:08):
I went to a woman's health physio, made sure things
were good well on the way and took that advice.
And that's something that I would recommend anyone to do
that's gone through any kind of birth actually, because for
nine months there's been a lot of pressure on your
power wric floor and that comes with consequences potentially.
Speaker 1 (14:32):
You're listening, do we need to talk with Tony Street?
Speaker 2 (14:35):
Actually on there I am with Mackenzie after Juliet. I
went and saw a pregnancy physio while I was pregnant,
because I got a lot of tailbone and say it okay,
And so that was a game changer.
Speaker 3 (14:49):
I don't know what they did.
Speaker 2 (14:50):
They did some sort of massaging of my hips and
it completely alleviated the pain.
Speaker 4 (14:54):
Oh gosh, I think that, you know, pain is something
that you actually don't have to put up with. I
tried to run in pregnancy, and I because I missed
the feeling of running, yes, but then the day after
I couldn't really walk because I had I could feel
my pubic but yeah, pain, pain every step and I'd
(15:15):
feel like this old lady, a wale of a lady.
And it was good mentally, but actually not physically, not physically,
And so you've got to listen to you know, there's
a reason why you're getting pain, but there's also opportunities,
like a pregnancy physio, like other people specialists who can
(15:37):
help you.
Speaker 3 (15:37):
And there's no harm in actually reaching out to trying
their help.
Speaker 4 (15:41):
No, like, you are not going to get a crown
for surviving pain unnecessarily.
Speaker 1 (15:48):
You don't need to be a martyr about it. Just
get on and get the help.
Speaker 2 (15:51):
And I think to reflecting now with a twelve, nine
and six year old, that time actually goes. I know
it doesn't feel like it at the start, but it
actually goes quite quickly. And now when I look back,
you just want to be able to actually get some
enjoyment too, not make it hard on yourself. I know,
particularly those precious weeks after you have your baby, you
just want to you can to enjoy it as much
(16:14):
as possible without just feeling like you're having to get
your body back, having to get back into work.
Speaker 3 (16:19):
If that's what you know, your idea is, you just
want to. I don't know.
Speaker 2 (16:23):
I just if I could go back, I'd probably just
savor it a bit more, I feel like I did
with each child because you learn that lesson. But that
would be a message to first time parents is just
you know, lap it up because it does.
Speaker 4 (16:36):
Go quick totally, and it's like treasure. That's precious time.
Because like you say, everyone says, you know, oh they'll
be off university or of spreading the you know, sreading
this or whatever that's stilly saying, but it does you
blink and nine and six.
Speaker 2 (16:54):
I'm sitting here with a daughter going to high school
next year lose my mind.
Speaker 3 (16:59):
I feel like I just exactly.
Speaker 4 (17:02):
And so every day, you know, being a parent is
such a gift, It is such a privilege, and you know,
in those first few years, gosh it it is precious.
And so every day it's no matter how exhausted you are,
and sometimes you just think, oh, how am I going
to get through this?
Speaker 2 (17:22):
It doesn't feel like a gift sometimes, I know, no,
You're like, oh, punishing, this is what was.
Speaker 3 (17:27):
The hardest part?
Speaker 2 (17:28):
Do you think for you? After both pregnancies and that
fourth trimester?
Speaker 4 (17:32):
I remember thinking when we had Max and it was
like I didn't realize, like I had no idea.
Speaker 3 (17:41):
You don't know you when you had Max? I was
thirty yep, I was twenty ninety.
Speaker 4 (17:46):
Yeah, I remember thinking, how am I ever going to
leave the house? How am I going to leave the house?
Because I've got this baby that has to sleep, and
then I've got to do this, and then I've got.
Speaker 3 (17:58):
To do that, and have you changed in fed? And
you know, are they cold?
Speaker 1 (18:02):
Are who knows what they need?
Speaker 4 (18:05):
And then I remember thinking, how am I ever going
to get to somewhere on time? Or how am I
going to get do anything? And I remember this overwhelm
of like, oh goodness, my life is really changed, naively thought,
you know, oh, we'll just you know, there's things will
get figured out, and you know, over time, it's like,
(18:28):
oh the sunris is the next day, you know, you
get there's always the sun will keep turning around, you know,
and I think you just figure things out. But you've
got to just accept whatever happens on that day, whether
it is not a gift or a gift or somewhere
in between, that actually this is this is kind of
(18:50):
like a bit of a rollercoaster ride at times. But
if you just hold on, keep safety safety about on,
and grip tightly to your person next to you, then
you'll be all right. You talked about how your career
kind of had the brakes put on at a wee bits,
particularly because you were transitioning from athletes to whatever your
career was going to look like after that. Did you
feel any pressure financially to or even just career letter wise,
(19:16):
to get back into it quick I felt like an
internal pressure to contribute to that to our family, I
guess from a financial scenes, And I think that that's
something that needs to be talked about more because it's like, actually,
you are contributing so much staying and locking after your child,
(19:40):
yet we've got this guilt or.
Speaker 1 (19:44):
Like this other layer of like I feel like I
need to.
Speaker 4 (19:47):
Be paying for stuff or like earning money to be
able to pay for other staff, or you know, have
a holiday or whatever, not that it's a holiday, but
you know a change of scene. And so I I
think that that definitely for me, I did feel that
and that, and I remember my husband actually had backsuderie
(20:07):
six at when Max was six months old, and I thought, oh, great,
he'll stay home. He had six weeks off work, and
I was like, I had booked all these jobs, these.
Speaker 1 (20:16):
Speaking gigs, and then.
Speaker 4 (20:20):
I remember going to the Sudran and it was like
you can't lift He couldn't lift Max, because.
Speaker 3 (20:27):
I was like, how am I going to do?
Speaker 1 (20:29):
Oh my gosh, Oh my gosh, how is this going
to work? In my head? And I was like, oh,
this is not what I had imagined.
Speaker 3 (20:38):
What did you do?
Speaker 4 (20:39):
I remember calling like because we didn't have family in Auckland,
we had heaps of friends who were great, but everyone's got.
Speaker 1 (20:47):
Their own stuff.
Speaker 4 (20:48):
And I remember calling like a nanny agency or something,
and they were like, oh, okay, so we'll got a
couple of months.
Speaker 1 (20:56):
Wait, and I was like, no, I needed.
Speaker 3 (21:00):
Today.
Speaker 1 (21:01):
I was like, I'm.
Speaker 4 (21:01):
Actually needing this pretty promptly actually, And so as it
turned out, Gus's cousin's daughter came and helped us for
a bit, and then we had someone else, and then
my mother in law came and.
Speaker 1 (21:15):
It all kind of worked out.
Speaker 4 (21:17):
But you know, it's all these other layers that you
don't really factor in or people don't really discuss, so
you don't think it's an issue. Actually we should talk
about this because it's things that we need to be
aware of and we need to say, actually, you go
a lot on your brain already, this is just another layer,
(21:39):
so maybe be prepared for it.
Speaker 3 (21:41):
I think about that now.
Speaker 2 (21:42):
In the current climate as well, where times are financially
tough for a lot of people, mortgages and rents are
particularly high, and you know, when you're scrimping kind of
for every dollar, and if you do want to have
one parent that's off for a certain amount of time,
it's a whole other different consideration. If you don't have family,
like we just spoke about, you know, sometimes that stay
(22:04):
at home role isn't valued. Be someone that's got two
people working and have to pay for daycare or a
part time.
Speaker 3 (22:10):
Nanny, and then you will understand the true value.
Speaker 1 (22:13):
Of what it is one hundred percent.
Speaker 4 (22:15):
And my brother lives in Sydney and what they were
paying in childcare because they both worked full time was
just unbelievable.
Speaker 2 (22:23):
It almost wipes out a whole salary exactly exactly.
Speaker 1 (22:27):
So you know, there's it.
Speaker 4 (22:29):
Isn't value to be at home, but also it's okay
to value going away from home as well, because I
think that there's too much judgment on working mothers who
are actually just trying to provide a roof over people's
heads and really difficult financial circumstances and put food on
(22:50):
the plate. You know, we've got to be really careful
about the messages that we're sending across to say, you know,
you should be at home, and yes, absolutely, but the
reality is for many people that's not a reality.
Speaker 3 (23:02):
It's not a practical solution.
Speaker 2 (23:04):
And I think the other thing just on judgment too,
is you assume people are judging you, right, and you
might think that with other mothers in particular, but the
reality is, I think as most mothers are so consumed
with their own situation and trying to make whatever their
situation is work, that they're not looking at you. They're
(23:26):
too consumed with their own guilts and their own planning
to actually look at another person's situation. They might compare,
but they're not looking at you judging you. They might go, oh,
they look like they've.
Speaker 3 (23:37):
Got it together.
Speaker 2 (23:38):
Probably more than likely that's their attitude as opposed to, oh,
look at the way they are doing thing.
Speaker 1 (23:43):
I know.
Speaker 4 (23:44):
Actually, I had this great podcast by Brene Brown recently
around everyone's trying their best and actually, if you have
that intention of you're trying your best for you and
I'm trying my best for me, great, let's all just
try and be our best and have that mindset around
(24:05):
what other people are doing.
Speaker 1 (24:07):
Is that just doing the best.
Speaker 2 (24:08):
It's interesting how we do heat that pressure on ourselves,
because I remember so clearly after having Juliet and Mom
said to me, oh, now i'll watch you. You go
for a run, And I was like, oh, oh, oh no,
I'll just stay here.
Speaker 3 (24:23):
Now.
Speaker 2 (24:23):
I had got up at three point thirty, I'd gone
and worked, i'd come back, I'd been you know, I'd
been with my baby, put her to bed, and for
some reason, I didn't think it was fine to go
for a little run while she was asleep. And my
mom was looking at it, and Mom was like, what
are you going to do here? She's asleep, Go and
do your run now. Yeah, And I had to almost
(24:44):
change my mind shift to realize why who was putting
this pressure on me?
Speaker 3 (24:48):
It's only me, It's no one.
Speaker 1 (24:49):
Else's exactly why.
Speaker 3 (24:51):
Do I not think it's okay?
Speaker 2 (24:52):
And I think in my mind, I was like, I'm
a working mum, so I'm already away from her for
this chunk in the morning, so when.
Speaker 3 (25:00):
I get back, I have to be one hundred percent
with her.
Speaker 2 (25:03):
But the reality of that is she doesn't even she
doesn't care if Nana's watching your sleep or if I'm
watching your sleep.
Speaker 4 (25:09):
And I think that that pressure that you can put
on yourself, it can totally be like suffocating because it's
actually the only pressure that you are really internalizing is
your internal pressure. And it's so great when you know
my mum the same thing encouraging me knowing how important
(25:29):
it is to my well being. Strategy, Let's say that
I exercise, that I do other things that to give
you the nudge to go it's fine. You know your
mum like, okay, you can do it, exactly.
Speaker 3 (25:45):
We still need the okay from our mom. What is that?
Speaker 1 (25:48):
Oh, Matte forty still need it.
Speaker 3 (25:51):
That's so pathetic. But I don't know why it's the case.
So you did it once and then you did it
all over again.
Speaker 2 (25:57):
Will you quite a different mother? Do you think those
in those first few weeks second time.
Speaker 4 (26:02):
Round, Yeah, are way more relaxed in terms of you know,
because you're like, oh.
Speaker 1 (26:06):
I kin't of know what to do.
Speaker 2 (26:07):
Yeah, well I've had a practice also than not at
all from the beginning.
Speaker 4 (26:11):
Yeah, And I think it's like you realize, actually nothing
needs to be perfect. Actually it just needs to be
done or the best it can be done. And I
think that you have no choice as well. You've got
a toddler, you've got a newborn. You just need to
figure out one feed to the next, or one one
hour to the next, whatever it is. It's not necessarily
(26:33):
I don't think sometimes you can go, oh, just get
through the week or get through the month. Actually, just
get through the next feed, 'll get through to the
next sleep.
Speaker 3 (26:40):
No days the same.
Speaker 2 (26:41):
That's sactly thing as well.
Speaker 3 (26:44):
This is we need to talk with Tony Street.
Speaker 2 (26:48):
Would there be anything that you would change if you
went back with the knowledge you now have to make
that time easier.
Speaker 4 (26:57):
It's hard to say to go back and change because
I think that probably would do things a little bit different, but.
Speaker 1 (27:02):
The way we did it wouldn't.
Speaker 4 (27:05):
Then we wouldn't have had the lessons that we learned
from it, and we wouldn't have, you know, had the
growth as parents as people. So I never am comfortable
with change. If anything, what I would change would be
the support and the empathy I showed to my friends
when they were parents and I was not a parent
(27:25):
because I did not know what they were going through.
Speaker 2 (27:28):
The poor first friend that has the baby, that was
my bestie, Sophie, she had her child a lot younger
than we did.
Speaker 3 (27:35):
Yeah, and I just had no idea.
Speaker 4 (27:37):
I was flying around the world being an athlete, and
here are some of my friends who are like deeper
nappies and I just think, oh my gosh.
Speaker 1 (27:48):
I remember having this realization of like I should have
just been Yeah.
Speaker 4 (27:53):
You know, made a meal more or you know small
ax a kindness can make such a difference. And that's
the same Like my best in Lou who's now got
twelve year old eleven year old, and I think, oh jeez,
I could have really done a bit.
Speaker 1 (28:08):
Better of being a friend. But you don't know. That's
that they.
Speaker 2 (28:11):
Actually don't and they wouldn't have known either, and they're
probably not going well. You need to give me more
support because they're new at it as well.
Speaker 1 (28:20):
Yeah, absolutely, but it does make you have more empathy.
Speaker 2 (28:22):
And actually, Sam, who I host radio with, he had
his kids a bit later, and he says the same
thing because he's had a lot of friends have babies
before him, and he says, Ooh, I really didn't give
you any slack or any thought, but you don't.
Speaker 3 (28:38):
And I said, Tom, it's not your fault. You had
no idea.
Speaker 4 (28:40):
Yeah, yeah, exactly. And so again everyone's is doing the best.
And if you have that intent for people, then it's
like one day they might understand if they're being parents.
But actually it's actually I can sometimes live vicariously through
other people when you are in the depths of I
(29:00):
feel like I'm with you on this other planet.
Speaker 2 (29:03):
Especially with social media now you can literally take a
seat and watch what they're doing.
Speaker 1 (29:08):
Yeah, one hundred percent.
Speaker 4 (29:09):
I remember with Max I found myself locked on like
a scrolling pattern, which was dangerous, and that comparison as
well came into it. And actually there were times where
I was, actually, I don't need to see this. I
don't need to see this, but this is just a
(29:30):
little moment of joy that I'm having. I was super
conscious with Poppy not to get trapped into that cycle
of thinking I want to be somewhere else.
Speaker 1 (29:40):
Actually I actually really.
Speaker 4 (29:42):
Want to be here and enjoying this time, because, like
I say, it's just ghosts.
Speaker 2 (29:47):
So okrectly you talk about those little things that make
a difference. Those little moments are like the woman at
the coffee shop who you've got a bit of interaction with.
Do you remember that time? Other little things. Was it
something someone said to you or something someone did for
you that made a difference and you remember it.
Speaker 4 (30:03):
I remember some friends coming over and just without me prompting,
just folding my washing or just like even just that
little act of just like oh thank you, making you
a cap ofe. And you know, my friends and my
family know that how much exercise and sport has been
such a pillar for me in my life. So they
(30:24):
have looked after the baby while I've gone for a walk,
all run, or gone to the gym or whatever, and
those those sort of moments I've looked back and just gone, oh,
thank you for the chance to be by myself for
a little bit, because as much as you love that
time with your child, your baby, actually, for a long
(30:46):
time as an individual athlete, I spent a lot of
time by myself. Yes, I would have got used to that, yeah,
And it was something that I really figured out. I
was like, I've always got my little mate with me,
which is great, but I actually.
Speaker 1 (31:00):
Really need time by myself.
Speaker 3 (31:02):
You crave it.
Speaker 1 (31:03):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (31:03):
And it's funny because I feel like you probably one
way or the other, and I feel like I was
the opposite of that. I never really spent time by myself,
and suddenly it was just me and the baby at
home at times, and I felt quite isolated. Yeah, so
I really valued just having someone even just sitting there
as I was going about it just I don't know
gave you comfort, but I think that's your personality is
(31:25):
a wide one of two ways.
Speaker 3 (31:26):
Respect.
Speaker 4 (31:27):
It's funny because I need the time by myself, but
then I need the extraversion of like people.
Speaker 1 (31:32):
So I'm like this tension of me, I want to
go for a run.
Speaker 4 (31:36):
Now go, but now go, I of you, or least
your pack run and then I'll do.
Speaker 1 (31:41):
Something else, you know. So it's that knowing.
Speaker 4 (31:45):
I guess what you need or your partner or you know,
hopefully you've got a partner you're doing this together, or
your support people to go. Actually, I think she needs
more people, or I think she needs time by herself.
And I remember, actually and when we came out of
lockdown pop People was really sick and she she had
(32:06):
these really horrendous fevers and they were like really close
to putting her, saying to senending us to hospital.
Speaker 1 (32:13):
Thank goodness they didn't.
Speaker 4 (32:14):
But so for like a week I slept on the
mattress like next to her because it was she just
wouldn't go to sleep.
Speaker 1 (32:23):
And it was just one of those times.
Speaker 4 (32:25):
And I remember going just needing a break, and my
mom had come over, which was great, and I said,
I'm going to go into town and run run these stairs.
And I remember Gus coming back and saying to my mum,
I shall come back differently, you know, she'll come back
with a lot what energy. And it was exactly true,
(32:47):
because sometimes you actually need to let other people tell
you what you need, yes.
Speaker 2 (32:54):
And let people do something nice for you, because totally
and really my experiences, people want to be useful, but
sometimes they don't know how to be You almost have
to tell them can you just watch the baby for
half an hour? Or can you make me a coffee?
And I remember at that time often going I don't know,
I'm fine, like thinking I'm going to get a medal
(33:16):
for saying I'm fine. It's like, just let them make
you a bloody lasagna exactly exactly.
Speaker 3 (33:21):
Who does not like a warm.
Speaker 4 (33:23):
Company lasagna made by someone else for you?
Speaker 1 (33:27):
And that's the thing. It's like, there are no badges
of honor, like take the help.
Speaker 2 (33:31):
It doesn't mean you're a failure in any way either,
just because you're not juggling a thousand different balls. I
just don't think we're meant to be like that. I
think we're meant to have help, support, We're meant to
be comforted. I feel like times have changed a lot, perhaps,
you know, I don't know. Fifty sixty years ago, mothers
were treated like, oh, you've just had a baby, take
(33:54):
your time, let's wrap around you. And somewhere along the
line it's changed to oh, mothers should be able to
do everything.
Speaker 1 (34:00):
Yeah. The thing is, you can do a lot, right, and.
Speaker 3 (34:03):
Some people mothers want to We both wanted.
Speaker 4 (34:06):
To visit, absolutely, but you can't do it all at
the same time. And so that's that, that's the realization
of you know, like I'm a multi ventor. I love
having lots of things on the go like you, But
you can only do what's in front of you.
Speaker 1 (34:20):
You've got to be where you are.
Speaker 4 (34:22):
And so while our brains are conditioned to be like, Okay,
what's what am I going to make for dinner tonight?
What what's what's the kids doing tomorrow? What do I
need to?
Speaker 1 (34:31):
What stanks do they need?
Speaker 4 (34:32):
Actually, you need to be where you are and enjoy
that moment and go this is a gift to be
in this present moment right now, and let's just get
on with it and live our lives without the guild,
without the regret, because that's always going to be there.
Speaker 1 (34:49):
You can't you can't quiden that down.
Speaker 4 (34:52):
But what you can do is actually celebrate. Actually, we've
got this life to live, We've got you know, beautiful children,
and there's just go for it.
Speaker 2 (35:01):
Part of the reason I wanted to get you on
this podcast is because I feel like you live that
sort of gratitude life and you watch your Instagram and
you're inspiring. I mean, for a start, you can do
so many press up and shut up some things, but
you do share that message a lot, and I know
that's important to you, and you have you never miss
a Monday's. That's become like do you get quite a
(35:23):
lot of joy from sharing that side of your life.
Speaker 4 (35:26):
What I get joy from is people saying, hey, I
know that I know that you're going to be exercising
on Monday, and I'm going to be exercising on Monday
too because of that, And I think sometimes I think, oh,
I can't really be bothered or you know what it's
like you, Oh, I don't really have to do this.
Then someone says to me, you really helped me, and
(35:49):
I'm like, Okay, I'll keep doing it because actually, through
my athletics career, I developed a lot of strategies, lot
of tools around how to steam motivated, how to keep
setting goals, what can I do to help with general wellness? Sleep,
you know, nutrition. Everyone can go for a walk or
(36:12):
a run or do a workout, but they can't necessarily
do it consistently over a period of time, and it's
been great over the new year to see so many
people out exercising, being active. But my challenge to everyone
is how do you keep that going? And so for
me having to do that through my athletics career, I've
(36:34):
developed strategies that I know trick my mind when I
am falling off the wagon.
Speaker 3 (36:39):
Can you share someone now? Yeah?
Speaker 1 (36:41):
Absolutely?
Speaker 2 (36:42):
So.
Speaker 4 (36:43):
You know, simple things like music or you know, having
your workout clothes laid out for you, going directly to
the place of exercise, do not deviate. You know, things
that in the morning, I know I'm better because otherwise
i'm you know, the two do list builds up through
the day, so I know that I have to schedule
(37:04):
things in for exercise in the morning is better for me.
I can do it throughout the day, but I know
to be more effective, it's in the morning.
Speaker 2 (37:13):
I've got my nine year old daughter listening to this
podcast and we've just been talking to her about if
you're going to get your run done, it's got to
be in the morning, because suddenly, come three o'clock, I
think I'll just do two tomorrow.
Speaker 1 (37:25):
And I get that. I feel that too.
Speaker 4 (37:28):
And so for me, if I'm picking up my kids
at three o'clock and I'm lucky I live a minute
from school, I can hear the school bell, so I
only do really have to leave it three. I know,
like two twenty is kind of like a bit of
an alarm bell for me, Like.
Speaker 3 (37:43):
What will we do it in twenty I'll.
Speaker 1 (37:44):
Do like twenty minutes of exercise.
Speaker 2 (37:47):
That counts it percent percent. I think I've had a
mindset before. They can't go for a proper run, yeah,
a proper hit workout, no point no, no no.
Speaker 4 (37:58):
So you can do things throughout the day which add
up some days.
Speaker 1 (38:01):
What I will do if I've got like.
Speaker 4 (38:03):
Meetings through the day or whatever, I'll start like a
meeting and I'll just do like ten push ups, ten
air squats, and then on the hour, I'll just keep
doing it.
Speaker 1 (38:12):
That adds up.
Speaker 4 (38:13):
It's all about, you know, movement rather than you know,
what we've been conditioned to believe is actually what we
should be doing is thirty to forty minutes of high
intensity of and actually what we need to do is
just move more, yes, and move more regularly, move more
with intention, and it all adds up. Nothing is wasted,
(38:36):
and I think that that's something which i'd like to
kind of shift in people who are busy like yourself,
who you know, might not find the window of ten
minutes is better than no minutes. One minute is better
than no minute. And so that's the thing with never
missing Monday for me is actually sometimes i would get
to eight o'clock at night and I'd be like, I've
(38:56):
done no exercise today or something, and my husband Will
I would say, Oh, we'll do a minute of birth piece.
And it's horrendous, right, it's really great. It's only a
minute of your life in a minute. Everyone's got a minute.
And then what usually happens is, oh, do another minute.
So the hardest thing is to start sometimes a lot
(39:17):
of the time.
Speaker 1 (39:17):
It really is.
Speaker 4 (39:18):
But if you don't start something, you'll never finish. And
so you need to just be we need to be
softer on ourselves as in terms of our expectations of
what exercise is, but also you know, flexible enough to
go actually today, I've got twenty minutes here, or I've
got ten minutes there, I've got five minutes here.
Speaker 1 (39:40):
At it all up. And I'm lucky in a sense.
Speaker 4 (39:43):
That sometimes I do work from home, So I am
just wearing a T shirt short so it's no.
Speaker 3 (39:48):
Way everyone's working from home.
Speaker 4 (39:50):
These days, and I'm putting on a blazer for a
zoom call, you know. But there are movement opportunities throughout
the day for everyone. It's walking to the coffee shop,
it's parking further away. It's actually saying I'm doing this
so I can look after myself, so I can look
after my people. And when you have that clarity of
(40:11):
why you are doing this, why you must do this,
to keep going, to live the life you want to live,
that gets you going.
Speaker 2 (40:19):
I think this is a wonderful place to wrap up
because I think we've come full circle.
Speaker 3 (40:23):
Because what better advice to.
Speaker 2 (40:25):
Give a new mum than to say, take the pressure off,
just do a little bit where you can. It doesn't
have to be a big ordeal.
Speaker 1 (40:32):
Yeah exactly.
Speaker 4 (40:33):
And motherhood is such a journey and you know those
newborn days are so precious, so enjoy it, be kind
to yourself and just you do you.
Speaker 1 (40:43):
We need to talk with Coast FM's Tony Street.
Speaker 4 (40:47):
If you enjoyed the podcast, click to share with family
or friends. To get in touch email, We need to
talk at Coast Online, dot co, dot nz,
We need to Talk Conversations on wellness with co cfm's
Tony Street.
Speaker 2 (00:06):
Hello, welcome to we need to talk today. We're talking
about the fourth trimester of parenthood, those precious months after
your baby is born, when you're adjusting to having a
newborn in the house, You're finding a new routine, potentially
going back to work, all while your body recovers from
the birth. It's a full on time that can be
a blur and something you might not fully reflect on
(00:26):
until your kids are a bit older. I'm at that
point now that my youngest of three children is six.
Today's episode is brought to us by Contact Energy. Since
twenty twenty two, Contact Energy has given three months of
free energy to nearly four thousand Kiwi families with newborns.
This money has been used on many things to make
those first precious months a little easier, like buying a
(00:47):
new pram, flying Nanna up for extra support, or giving
dads more time off work to be with their little one.
Contact Energy is making it good to be home for
our newest New Zealanders, which I think is pretty cool.
Allie Ross has been through this twice, first with Max
now aged nine, and then.
Speaker 3 (01:04):
With Poppy, who was six.
Speaker 2 (01:05):
Sarah is a former New Zealand heptathlete turned mother of two.
She's a wellness advocate and sports presenter. Sarah and I
hosted the twenty ten Tokyo Olympics together for TVNZ. Her
athletics career spanned fifteen years. She was New Zealand's high
jump and heptathlon champion and attended numerous World Championships, Olympics
and the Commonwealth Games. Sarah is also a qualified physiotherapist
(01:29):
and columnist for The Locker Room. We were just saying,
it is a while ago that you gave birth and
had that sort of fourth trimester period, but for you
quite unique, because when you're an athlete, that must throw
up a whole sort of different realm of considerations.
Speaker 1 (01:46):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (01:47):
I think that for me, when you know we are
pregnant with Max, it was like, oh wow, this is great.
But it was during the time where I was transitioning
from finishing elite sport.
Speaker 1 (02:01):
To you know, real world really.
Speaker 4 (02:04):
And so that transition was pretty confronting for me, I
have to say, because I'd gone from I did hit
tath on for the majority of my athletics career, but
for the final two years I did high jump, and
high jumper's body does not look like a pregnant woman's body.
So it was just this real, stark and quite abrupt
(02:29):
transition for me, which was in some ways good, I think,
because it was like, okay, right, you really need to
roll with this, but it also made it, you know,
really challenging as well.
Speaker 3 (02:42):
How did you cope with that?
Speaker 2 (02:43):
Like, when your body started changing, was it okay?
Speaker 1 (02:47):
No? I did not like it.
Speaker 4 (02:48):
I did not like it because it was a lot
of change, not only like physically but mentally trying to
be like I'm cool with this, but I'm really not.
And and during that time, I think any transition can
be a little bit sticky, no matter where whatever it is.
But I think I was going from being an individual
(03:12):
athlete where everything was really focused on me quite selfishly,
to actually, I need to really take care of my
body to grow this little human inside me. And I
wasn't an experience which I initially was comfortable with. Actually
(03:34):
probably it was not comfortable with it the whole time,
but I learned to over time accept it and kind
of embrace it.
Speaker 2 (03:42):
Yeah, it's interesting you talk about the time that that
all happened because I feel like there's never really a
right time to have a child, right and often when
it's your first child, you are changing most people from
a career into quite a different phase of your life.
And if you're intending to keep going with your career,
then what is that look like?
Speaker 3 (04:00):
And you want to try and plan it while you're.
Speaker 2 (04:02):
Pregnant, but you actually don't know how you're going to
react once the baby comes either.
Speaker 4 (04:06):
No, I had no idea, And you know, if you
ask anyone honestly, hopefully they'll give you an honest answer
and say, I actually had no idea as well. You
can put all the plans in place, but you don't
know what kind of baby you're going to have, You
don't know what kind of parents you're going to be,
And so I think that that transition of actually mindset
as well is really something that I hadn't considered, and
(04:31):
so that in itself was actually quite challenging as well.
To go. I like having a plan. I like being
organized and just being like, oh my goodness, what the
heck is going on here?
Speaker 3 (04:44):
What to be doing?
Speaker 2 (04:45):
So the plan that you had once you got pregnant
on how you were going to transition with your career.
Did that follow the plan that you had or did
you have to change that.
Speaker 4 (04:55):
I probably didn't have as quite structed plan as I
thought I was. It was in a time where I
was actually dedicated so much of my life to being
an athlete, and it was actually, oh, this is a
time where I'm going to, like you say, progress my career.
And then it was just like, oh, I felt like
the brakes were on because I was just kind of
(05:16):
getting my dipping my toes into it.
Speaker 1 (05:18):
But actually that was fine.
Speaker 4 (05:20):
I actually realized during that time what I wanted to
kind of do. The pause gave me more clarity around, Okay,
I don't want to be at a desk twenty four
to seven. I need variety. I need to be doing
things with people. I need to be doing things which
create impact or give value to the world. And so
(05:46):
that became clearer on reflection. Probably at the time I thought, oh,
my gosh, I have no idea what the heck is
going on.
Speaker 3 (05:55):
Probably still do, but it.
Speaker 1 (05:58):
Was, in hindsight, a good time to stop.
Speaker 2 (06:01):
Yeah and see. For me, I had the exact opposite experience.
So when I got pregnant with Juliet, who's now twelve,
I was a full on sports reporter, you know, traveling
around the country for one News. I was hosting Netbull
at the time, and my plan was I am going
to stop and I'm going to have a complete year off,
(06:22):
and then on my due dates, I got asked to
meet with the bosses and offered the breakfast presenting position.
But the catch was that was on October third, because
my daughter was born on October fourth, and I had
to start in the January.
Speaker 3 (06:37):
So suddenly I had gone from this pan of I'm going.
Speaker 2 (06:40):
To have a year off, just be at home join
my baby, and then suddenly it was like, no, I'm
having to prepare for this major acceleration in my career,
getting up at three point thirty in the morning, and
this is happening when.
Speaker 3 (06:53):
My baby's twelve weeks old.
Speaker 1 (06:55):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (06:55):
And I remember having to decide whether I could do that, yeah,
without having the baby yet.
Speaker 3 (07:01):
Yes, And I don't know how you do that.
Speaker 2 (07:03):
And I remember saying to them, I think I can
do it, but I don't know what it's going to
be like.
Speaker 3 (07:09):
I don't know whether I'm going to get a colicky baby.
Speaker 2 (07:11):
I want my baby to be healthy first of all,
Am I going to get postnatal depression? Am I going
to feel confident enough to get back on the telly
twelve weeks later?
Speaker 3 (07:19):
I don't know?
Speaker 2 (07:21):
And then the reality was I did manage it, but
it took it an awful amount of juggling to make
it work.
Speaker 4 (07:26):
Yeah, And I think that's the thing is that, like you,
we're all capable of probably much more than what we think.
That's what I reflect and like I have no doubt that.
I mean, I saw you or incredible and I you know,
behind the scenes, you're saying, how is this woman doing this?
I was crying, I got exactly But you wrap the
(07:47):
support around you and you figure it out, you know.
On reflection, when I was pregnant, I was actually doing
a maternity leave cover, so had gone in to tell
my sponsor, Essex that I was retiring, and then as
a result of that, they said, oh, do you want
to come and work for us? And so I had
this year of working for them on this maternity leave
(08:08):
cover and that I actually got pregnant, and they had
sort of asked if I would come back, but I was.
It sort of was a natural end for me in
that role, and that's when I was able to work
for myself more and do things that around Max initially
and subsequently Poppy. But I think that, you know, we
(08:33):
are capable of much more, but it does come with
supreme organization and also looking after ourselves that we can
keep going.
Speaker 2 (08:45):
You're so right, you need that support, and you need
support in lots of different ways. And one of the
big things that I can reflect on now after having
three children is that just because, like you said, you
might have looked at me and gone, oh my gosh,
you know, her baby's twelve weeks old, how is she
in it tally and how is she managing that? But
(09:05):
the reality is the mom who's at home with their
twelve week old yep, there in those early hours in
the morning, it's probably up anyway, potentially breastfeeding, potentially with
a crying baby. It doesn't mean what I was doing
was necessarily harder. It was just a different type of
heart totally the way you might say easier than dealing
(09:26):
with the baby, you know.
Speaker 4 (09:28):
And I think that one of the things that I'm
really conscious of is comparison, and I think that it
can be the theft of joy because people would say, oh,
you're back working, but they don't see you off camera.
They don't see all the hardships to have to leave
your child, to have to you know, figure it out,
(09:50):
to try and look after yourself or you're looking after
so many other people and fronting the freshing the nation.
And so I think that one of the things that
I was really conscious of is like, I'm going to
do me like we're going to do this, but we're
going to do it in our way because well, first
of them all, when you figure out our way, because
(10:12):
no one gives you this, man, you figure it out.
Speaker 2 (10:15):
And every child is so different as well, totally even
within a family right.
Speaker 4 (10:19):
Exactly, and how you parent one versus the other one.
You hope you're consistent, but you you know, it's the
reality is it's different because the child is different. And
so that comes with you know, care and consideration how
you do that. And I do think, you know, we're
very quick to judge people, we are, and parenting, I
(10:43):
think is one of the biggest things that we judge.
Speaker 2 (10:46):
And I think we're all so quiet, and I know
I was like this, like I was heightened to being
judged as well because in my mind, because I had
a mum, a dairy farming family, so my mum was
home all the time.
Speaker 3 (11:00):
So that's what I want.
Speaker 1 (11:01):
It to be.
Speaker 2 (11:02):
And in reality, I now know that I'm actually better
when I'm doing things and balancing it well. But I
remember thinking, are people going to think if I go
back at twelve weeks that I'm leaving my baby at home,
even though the reality was she was with her dad
and then I was there at eleven o'clock anyway, so
I was quite and you know, there were people. I remember,
people are quite nasty, and there were people that did
(11:23):
judge me for that. But I feel like the same
people will probably judge the mom for what are you
doing with your day?
Speaker 1 (11:29):
You know?
Speaker 3 (11:30):
So I can't really wink, but.
Speaker 1 (11:31):
You can't win.
Speaker 4 (11:32):
So you have to just focus on what's important your family,
and you'll circle around you who are supporting you and
also who are really important to you. And I think
that every motherhood journey or parenthood journey comes with so
many judgments and you'll be given so much advice, So
(11:53):
just be really select of listen, but be conscious of
what advice you take on and who you're taking it from.
Speaker 2 (11:59):
I think you if you trust yourself and your gut
you know what makes your family thrive and what you
need to be a good mum.
Speaker 1 (12:07):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (12:08):
Do you remember what those things were for you when
you had Max and Poppy? Like what the things that
were kind of that gave you joy and made the
house workable.
Speaker 3 (12:16):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (12:17):
So I'm like going that I like to be busy
and that I like to contribute, and I like actually
to feel like I'm doing something so then I come
home and I'm energized.
Speaker 3 (12:27):
Yep.
Speaker 4 (12:28):
And so for me that's important to me, and so
therefore it becomes important to our family unit. I mean,
the other non negotiables for me would be like I
have to be doing something active by no means is
it in comparison to what I used to do. I've
finished with that, and I'm like, right, twenty minutes of
exercise or whatever that will help me be a better
(12:51):
human and that will help me be a better wife,
to be a better teammate, so I can be a
better mum.
Speaker 2 (12:55):
When you had Max, how quickly did you get back
into exercise and what did it look like?
Speaker 4 (13:00):
I had emergency seasons with both the kids, so I
was very conscious of like I need a rest, but
also I need to do something gentle. So I remember
doing just walking for like till he was six six
weeks and he would he would sleep in the pram.
(13:23):
So it was great.
Speaker 3 (13:24):
I feel, oh boy, Max, it.
Speaker 4 (13:26):
Was great actually, and that got me out of the house.
It got the baby sleeping and got me breathing, you know,
fresh air and feeling like I could go and you know,
get my coffee and talk to the cafe lady who
you know, little did she know how much of a
joy she was in my day?
Speaker 3 (13:45):
You know, corrections important.
Speaker 4 (13:47):
Totally, totally, And so I didn't do anything drastic and
I was very slow for me. I wanted to run eventually,
and so I just started like a jog walk kind
of thing. Probably about ten weeks after with clearance, so
(14:08):
I went to a woman's health physio, made sure things
were good well on the way and took that advice.
And that's something that I would recommend anyone to do
that's gone through any kind of birth actually, because for
nine months there's been a lot of pressure on your
power wric floor and that comes with consequences potentially.
Speaker 1 (14:32):
You're listening, do we need to talk with Tony Street?
Speaker 2 (14:35):
Actually on there I am with Mackenzie after Juliet. I
went and saw a pregnancy physio while I was pregnant,
because I got a lot of tailbone and say it okay,
And so that was a game changer.
Speaker 3 (14:49):
I don't know what they did.
Speaker 2 (14:50):
They did some sort of massaging of my hips and
it completely alleviated the pain.
Speaker 4 (14:54):
Oh gosh, I think that, you know, pain is something
that you actually don't have to put up with. I
tried to run in pregnancy, and I because I missed
the feeling of running, yes, but then the day after
I couldn't really walk because I had I could feel
my pubic but yeah, pain, pain every step and I'd
(15:15):
feel like this old lady, a wale of a lady.
And it was good mentally, but actually not physically, not physically,
And so you've got to listen to you know, there's
a reason why you're getting pain, but there's also opportunities,
like a pregnancy physio, like other people specialists who can
(15:37):
help you.
Speaker 3 (15:37):
And there's no harm in actually reaching out to trying
their help.
Speaker 4 (15:41):
No, like, you are not going to get a crown
for surviving pain unnecessarily.
Speaker 1 (15:48):
You don't need to be a martyr about it. Just
get on and get the help.
Speaker 2 (15:51):
And I think to reflecting now with a twelve, nine
and six year old, that time actually goes. I know
it doesn't feel like it at the start, but it
actually goes quite quickly. And now when I look back,
you just want to be able to actually get some
enjoyment too, not make it hard on yourself. I know,
particularly those precious weeks after you have your baby, you
just want to you can to enjoy it as much
(16:14):
as possible without just feeling like you're having to get
your body back, having to get back into work.
Speaker 3 (16:19):
If that's what you know, your idea is, you just
want to. I don't know.
Speaker 2 (16:23):
I just if I could go back, I'd probably just
savor it a bit more, I feel like I did
with each child because you learn that lesson. But that
would be a message to first time parents is just
you know, lap it up because it does.
Speaker 4 (16:36):
Go quick totally, and it's like treasure. That's precious time.
Because like you say, everyone says, you know, oh they'll
be off university or of spreading the you know, sreading
this or whatever that's stilly saying, but it does you
blink and nine and six.
Speaker 2 (16:54):
I'm sitting here with a daughter going to high school
next year lose my mind.
Speaker 3 (16:59):
I feel like I just exactly.
Speaker 4 (17:02):
And so every day, you know, being a parent is
such a gift, It is such a privilege, and you know,
in those first few years, gosh it it is precious.
And so every day it's no matter how exhausted you are,
and sometimes you just think, oh, how am I going
to get through this?
Speaker 2 (17:22):
It doesn't feel like a gift sometimes, I know, no,
You're like, oh, punishing, this is what was.
Speaker 3 (17:27):
The hardest part?
Speaker 2 (17:28):
Do you think for you? After both pregnancies and that
fourth trimester?
Speaker 4 (17:32):
I remember thinking when we had Max and it was
like I didn't realize, like I had no idea.
Speaker 3 (17:41):
You don't know you when you had Max? I was
thirty yep, I was twenty ninety.
Speaker 4 (17:46):
Yeah, I remember thinking, how am I ever going to
leave the house? How am I going to leave the house?
Because I've got this baby that has to sleep, and
then I've got to do this, and then I've got.
Speaker 3 (17:58):
To do that, and have you changed in fed? And
you know, are they cold?
Speaker 1 (18:02):
Are who knows what they need?
Speaker 4 (18:05):
And then I remember thinking, how am I ever going
to get to somewhere on time? Or how am I
going to get do anything? And I remember this overwhelm
of like, oh goodness, my life is really changed, naively thought,
you know, oh, we'll just you know, there's things will
get figured out, and you know, over time, it's like,
(18:28):
oh the sunris is the next day, you know, you
get there's always the sun will keep turning around, you know,
and I think you just figure things out. But you've
got to just accept whatever happens on that day, whether
it is not a gift or a gift or somewhere
in between, that actually this is this is kind of
(18:50):
like a bit of a rollercoaster ride at times. But
if you just hold on, keep safety safety about on,
and grip tightly to your person next to you, then
you'll be all right. You talked about how your career
kind of had the brakes put on at a wee bits,
particularly because you were transitioning from athletes to whatever your
career was going to look like after that. Did you
feel any pressure financially to or even just career letter wise,
(19:16):
to get back into it quick I felt like an
internal pressure to contribute to that to our family, I
guess from a financial scenes, And I think that that's
something that needs to be talked about more because it's like, actually,
you are contributing so much staying and locking after your child,
(19:40):
yet we've got this guilt or.
Speaker 1 (19:44):
Like this other layer of like I feel like I
need to.
Speaker 4 (19:47):
Be paying for stuff or like earning money to be
able to pay for other staff, or you know, have
a holiday or whatever, not that it's a holiday, but
you know a change of scene. And so I I
think that that definitely for me, I did feel that
and that, and I remember my husband actually had backsuderie
(20:07):
six at when Max was six months old, and I thought, oh, great,
he'll stay home. He had six weeks off work, and
I was like, I had booked all these jobs, these.
Speaker 1 (20:16):
Speaking gigs, and then.
Speaker 4 (20:20):
I remember going to the Sudran and it was like
you can't lift He couldn't lift Max, because.
Speaker 3 (20:27):
I was like, how am I going to do?
Speaker 1 (20:29):
Oh my gosh, Oh my gosh, how is this going
to work? In my head? And I was like, oh,
this is not what I had imagined.
Speaker 3 (20:38):
What did you do?
Speaker 4 (20:39):
I remember calling like because we didn't have family in Auckland,
we had heaps of friends who were great, but everyone's got.
Speaker 1 (20:47):
Their own stuff.
Speaker 4 (20:48):
And I remember calling like a nanny agency or something,
and they were like, oh, okay, so we'll got a
couple of months.
Speaker 1 (20:56):
Wait, and I was like, no, I needed.
Speaker 3 (21:00):
Today.
Speaker 1 (21:01):
I was like, I'm.
Speaker 4 (21:01):
Actually needing this pretty promptly actually, And so as it
turned out, Gus's cousin's daughter came and helped us for
a bit, and then we had someone else, and then
my mother in law came and.
Speaker 1 (21:15):
It all kind of worked out.
Speaker 4 (21:17):
But you know, it's all these other layers that you
don't really factor in or people don't really discuss, so
you don't think it's an issue. Actually we should talk
about this because it's things that we need to be
aware of and we need to say, actually, you go
a lot on your brain already, this is just another layer,
(21:39):
so maybe be prepared for it.
Speaker 3 (21:41):
I think about that now.
Speaker 2 (21:42):
In the current climate as well, where times are financially
tough for a lot of people, mortgages and rents are
particularly high, and you know, when you're scrimping kind of
for every dollar, and if you do want to have
one parent that's off for a certain amount of time,
it's a whole other different consideration. If you don't have family,
like we just spoke about, you know, sometimes that stay
(22:04):
at home role isn't valued. Be someone that's got two
people working and have to pay for daycare or a
part time.
Speaker 3 (22:10):
Nanny, and then you will understand the true value.
Speaker 1 (22:13):
Of what it is one hundred percent.
Speaker 4 (22:15):
And my brother lives in Sydney and what they were
paying in childcare because they both worked full time was
just unbelievable.
Speaker 2 (22:23):
It almost wipes out a whole salary exactly exactly.
Speaker 1 (22:27):
So you know, there's it.
Speaker 4 (22:29):
Isn't value to be at home, but also it's okay
to value going away from home as well, because I
think that there's too much judgment on working mothers who
are actually just trying to provide a roof over people's
heads and really difficult financial circumstances and put food on
(22:50):
the plate. You know, we've got to be really careful
about the messages that we're sending across to say, you know,
you should be at home, and yes, absolutely, but the
reality is for many people that's not a reality.
Speaker 3 (23:02):
It's not a practical solution.
Speaker 2 (23:04):
And I think the other thing just on judgment too,
is you assume people are judging you, right, and you
might think that with other mothers in particular, but the
reality is, I think as most mothers are so consumed
with their own situation and trying to make whatever their
situation is work, that they're not looking at you. They're
(23:26):
too consumed with their own guilts and their own planning
to actually look at another person's situation. They might compare,
but they're not looking at you judging you. They might go, oh,
they look like they've.
Speaker 3 (23:37):
Got it together.
Speaker 2 (23:38):
Probably more than likely that's their attitude as opposed to, oh,
look at the way they are doing thing.
Speaker 1 (23:43):
I know.
Speaker 4 (23:44):
Actually, I had this great podcast by Brene Brown recently
around everyone's trying their best and actually, if you have
that intention of you're trying your best for you and
I'm trying my best for me, great, let's all just
try and be our best and have that mindset around
(24:05):
what other people are doing.
Speaker 1 (24:07):
Is that just doing the best.
Speaker 2 (24:08):
It's interesting how we do heat that pressure on ourselves,
because I remember so clearly after having Juliet and Mom
said to me, oh, now i'll watch you. You go
for a run, And I was like, oh, oh, oh no,
I'll just stay here.
Speaker 3 (24:23):
Now.
Speaker 2 (24:23):
I had got up at three point thirty, I'd gone
and worked, i'd come back, I'd been you know, I'd
been with my baby, put her to bed, and for
some reason, I didn't think it was fine to go
for a little run while she was asleep. And my
mom was looking at it, and Mom was like, what
are you going to do here? She's asleep, Go and
do your run now. Yeah, And I had to almost
(24:44):
change my mind shift to realize why who was putting
this pressure on me?
Speaker 3 (24:48):
It's only me, It's no one.
Speaker 1 (24:49):
Else's exactly why.
Speaker 3 (24:51):
Do I not think it's okay?
Speaker 2 (24:52):
And I think in my mind, I was like, I'm
a working mum, so I'm already away from her for
this chunk in the morning, so when.
Speaker 3 (25:00):
I get back, I have to be one hundred percent
with her.
Speaker 2 (25:03):
But the reality of that is she doesn't even she
doesn't care if Nana's watching your sleep or if I'm
watching your sleep.
Speaker 4 (25:09):
And I think that that pressure that you can put
on yourself, it can totally be like suffocating because it's
actually the only pressure that you are really internalizing is
your internal pressure. And it's so great when you know
my mum the same thing encouraging me knowing how important
(25:29):
it is to my well being. Strategy, Let's say that
I exercise, that I do other things that to give
you the nudge to go it's fine. You know your
mum like, okay, you can do it, exactly.
Speaker 3 (25:45):
We still need the okay from our mom. What is that?
Speaker 1 (25:48):
Oh, Matte forty still need it.
Speaker 3 (25:51):
That's so pathetic. But I don't know why it's the case.
So you did it once and then you did it
all over again.
Speaker 2 (25:57):
Will you quite a different mother? Do you think those
in those first few weeks second time.
Speaker 4 (26:02):
Round, Yeah, are way more relaxed in terms of you know,
because you're like, oh.
Speaker 1 (26:06):
I kin't of know what to do.
Speaker 2 (26:07):
Yeah, well I've had a practice also than not at
all from the beginning.
Speaker 4 (26:11):
Yeah, And I think it's like you realize, actually nothing
needs to be perfect. Actually it just needs to be
done or the best it can be done. And I
think that you have no choice as well. You've got
a toddler, you've got a newborn. You just need to
figure out one feed to the next, or one one
hour to the next, whatever it is. It's not necessarily
(26:33):
I don't think sometimes you can go, oh, just get
through the week or get through the month. Actually, just
get through the next feed, 'll get through to the
next sleep.
Speaker 3 (26:40):
No days the same.
Speaker 2 (26:41):
That's sactly thing as well.
Speaker 3 (26:44):
This is we need to talk with Tony Street.
Speaker 2 (26:48):
Would there be anything that you would change if you
went back with the knowledge you now have to make
that time easier.
Speaker 4 (26:57):
It's hard to say to go back and change because
I think that probably would do things a little bit different, but.
Speaker 1 (27:02):
The way we did it wouldn't.
Speaker 4 (27:05):
Then we wouldn't have had the lessons that we learned
from it, and we wouldn't have, you know, had the
growth as parents as people. So I never am comfortable
with change. If anything, what I would change would be
the support and the empathy I showed to my friends
when they were parents and I was not a parent
(27:25):
because I did not know what they were going through.
Speaker 2 (27:28):
The poor first friend that has the baby, that was
my bestie, Sophie, she had her child a lot younger
than we did.
Speaker 3 (27:35):
Yeah, and I just had no idea.
Speaker 4 (27:37):
I was flying around the world being an athlete, and
here are some of my friends who are like deeper
nappies and I just think, oh my gosh.
Speaker 1 (27:48):
I remember having this realization of like I should have
just been Yeah.
Speaker 4 (27:53):
You know, made a meal more or you know small
ax a kindness can make such a difference. And that's
the same Like my best in Lou who's now got
twelve year old eleven year old, and I think, oh jeez,
I could have really done a bit.
Speaker 1 (28:08):
Better of being a friend. But you don't know. That's
that they.
Speaker 2 (28:11):
Actually don't and they wouldn't have known either, and they're
probably not going well. You need to give me more
support because they're new at it as well.
Speaker 1 (28:20):
Yeah, absolutely, but it does make you have more empathy.
Speaker 2 (28:22):
And actually, Sam, who I host radio with, he had
his kids a bit later, and he says the same
thing because he's had a lot of friends have babies
before him, and he says, Ooh, I really didn't give
you any slack or any thought, but you don't.
Speaker 3 (28:38):
And I said, Tom, it's not your fault. You had
no idea.
Speaker 4 (28:40):
Yeah, yeah, exactly. And so again everyone's is doing the best.
And if you have that intent for people, then it's
like one day they might understand if they're being parents.
But actually it's actually I can sometimes live vicariously through
other people when you are in the depths of I
(29:00):
feel like I'm with you on this other planet.
Speaker 2 (29:03):
Especially with social media now you can literally take a
seat and watch what they're doing.
Speaker 1 (29:08):
Yeah, one hundred percent.
Speaker 4 (29:09):
I remember with Max I found myself locked on like
a scrolling pattern, which was dangerous, and that comparison as
well came into it. And actually there were times where
I was, actually, I don't need to see this. I
don't need to see this, but this is just a
(29:30):
little moment of joy that I'm having. I was super
conscious with Poppy not to get trapped into that cycle
of thinking I want to be somewhere else.
Speaker 1 (29:40):
Actually I actually really.
Speaker 4 (29:42):
Want to be here and enjoying this time, because, like
I say, it's just ghosts.
Speaker 2 (29:47):
So okrectly you talk about those little things that make
a difference. Those little moments are like the woman at
the coffee shop who you've got a bit of interaction with.
Do you remember that time? Other little things. Was it
something someone said to you or something someone did for
you that made a difference and you remember it.
Speaker 4 (30:03):
I remember some friends coming over and just without me prompting,
just folding my washing or just like even just that
little act of just like oh thank you, making you
a cap ofe. And you know, my friends and my
family know that how much exercise and sport has been
such a pillar for me in my life. So they
(30:24):
have looked after the baby while I've gone for a walk,
all run, or gone to the gym or whatever, and
those those sort of moments I've looked back and just gone, oh,
thank you for the chance to be by myself for
a little bit, because as much as you love that
time with your child, your baby, actually, for a long
(30:46):
time as an individual athlete, I spent a lot of
time by myself. Yes, I would have got used to that, yeah,
And it was something that I really figured out. I
was like, I've always got my little mate with me,
which is great, but I actually.
Speaker 1 (31:00):
Really need time by myself.
Speaker 3 (31:02):
You crave it.
Speaker 1 (31:03):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (31:03):
And it's funny because I feel like you probably one
way or the other, and I feel like I was
the opposite of that. I never really spent time by myself,
and suddenly it was just me and the baby at
home at times, and I felt quite isolated. Yeah, so
I really valued just having someone even just sitting there
as I was going about it just I don't know
gave you comfort, but I think that's your personality is
(31:25):
a wide one of two ways.
Speaker 3 (31:26):
Respect.
Speaker 4 (31:27):
It's funny because I need the time by myself, but
then I need the extraversion of like people.
Speaker 1 (31:32):
So I'm like this tension of me, I want to
go for a run.
Speaker 4 (31:36):
Now go, but now go, I of you, or least
your pack run and then I'll do.
Speaker 1 (31:41):
Something else, you know. So it's that knowing.
Speaker 4 (31:45):
I guess what you need or your partner or you know,
hopefully you've got a partner you're doing this together, or
your support people to go. Actually, I think she needs
more people, or I think she needs time by herself.
And I remember, actually and when we came out of
lockdown pop People was really sick and she she had
(32:06):
these really horrendous fevers and they were like really close
to putting her, saying to senending us to hospital.
Speaker 1 (32:13):
Thank goodness they didn't.
Speaker 4 (32:14):
But so for like a week I slept on the
mattress like next to her because it was she just
wouldn't go to sleep.
Speaker 1 (32:23):
And it was just one of those times.
Speaker 4 (32:25):
And I remember going just needing a break, and my
mom had come over, which was great, and I said,
I'm going to go into town and run run these stairs.
And I remember Gus coming back and saying to my mum,
I shall come back differently, you know, she'll come back
with a lot what energy. And it was exactly true,
(32:47):
because sometimes you actually need to let other people tell
you what you need, yes.
Speaker 2 (32:54):
And let people do something nice for you, because totally
and really my experiences, people want to be useful, but
sometimes they don't know how to be You almost have
to tell them can you just watch the baby for
half an hour? Or can you make me a coffee?
And I remember at that time often going I don't know,
I'm fine, like thinking I'm going to get a medal
(33:16):
for saying I'm fine. It's like, just let them make
you a bloody lasagna exactly exactly.
Speaker 3 (33:21):
Who does not like a warm.
Speaker 4 (33:23):
Company lasagna made by someone else for you?
Speaker 1 (33:27):
And that's the thing. It's like, there are no badges
of honor, like take the help.
Speaker 2 (33:31):
It doesn't mean you're a failure in any way either,
just because you're not juggling a thousand different balls. I
just don't think we're meant to be like that. I
think we're meant to have help, support, We're meant to
be comforted. I feel like times have changed a lot, perhaps,
you know, I don't know. Fifty sixty years ago, mothers
were treated like, oh, you've just had a baby, take
(33:54):
your time, let's wrap around you. And somewhere along the
line it's changed to oh, mothers should be able to
do everything.
Speaker 1 (34:00):
Yeah. The thing is, you can do a lot, right, and.
Speaker 3 (34:03):
Some people mothers want to We both wanted.
Speaker 4 (34:06):
To visit, absolutely, but you can't do it all at
the same time. And so that's that, that's the realization
of you know, like I'm a multi ventor. I love
having lots of things on the go like you, But
you can only do what's in front of you.
Speaker 1 (34:20):
You've got to be where you are.
Speaker 4 (34:22):
And so while our brains are conditioned to be like, Okay,
what's what am I going to make for dinner tonight?
What what's what's the kids doing tomorrow? What do I
need to?
Speaker 1 (34:31):
What stanks do they need?
Speaker 4 (34:32):
Actually, you need to be where you are and enjoy
that moment and go this is a gift to be
in this present moment right now, and let's just get
on with it and live our lives without the guild,
without the regret, because that's always going to be there.
Speaker 1 (34:49):
You can't you can't quiden that down.
Speaker 4 (34:52):
But what you can do is actually celebrate. Actually, we've
got this life to live, We've got you know, beautiful children,
and there's just go for it.
Speaker 2 (35:01):
Part of the reason I wanted to get you on
this podcast is because I feel like you live that
sort of gratitude life and you watch your Instagram and
you're inspiring. I mean, for a start, you can do
so many press up and shut up some things, but
you do share that message a lot, and I know
that's important to you, and you have you never miss
a Monday's. That's become like do you get quite a
(35:23):
lot of joy from sharing that side of your life.
Speaker 4 (35:26):
What I get joy from is people saying, hey, I
know that I know that you're going to be exercising
on Monday, and I'm going to be exercising on Monday
too because of that, And I think sometimes I think, oh,
I can't really be bothered or you know what it's
like you, Oh, I don't really have to do this.
Then someone says to me, you really helped me, and
(35:49):
I'm like, Okay, I'll keep doing it because actually, through
my athletics career, I developed a lot of strategies, lot
of tools around how to steam motivated, how to keep
setting goals, what can I do to help with general wellness? Sleep,
you know, nutrition. Everyone can go for a walk or
(36:12):
a run or do a workout, but they can't necessarily
do it consistently over a period of time, and it's
been great over the new year to see so many
people out exercising, being active. But my challenge to everyone
is how do you keep that going? And so for
me having to do that through my athletics career, I've
(36:34):
developed strategies that I know trick my mind when I
am falling off the wagon.
Speaker 3 (36:39):
Can you share someone now? Yeah?
Speaker 1 (36:41):
Absolutely?
Speaker 2 (36:42):
So.
Speaker 4 (36:43):
You know, simple things like music or you know, having
your workout clothes laid out for you, going directly to
the place of exercise, do not deviate. You know, things
that in the morning, I know I'm better because otherwise
i'm you know, the two do list builds up through
the day, so I know that I have to schedule
(37:04):
things in for exercise in the morning is better for me.
I can do it throughout the day, but I know
to be more effective, it's in the morning.
Speaker 2 (37:13):
I've got my nine year old daughter listening to this
podcast and we've just been talking to her about if
you're going to get your run done, it's got to
be in the morning, because suddenly, come three o'clock, I
think I'll just do two tomorrow.
Speaker 1 (37:25):
And I get that. I feel that too.
Speaker 4 (37:28):
And so for me, if I'm picking up my kids
at three o'clock and I'm lucky I live a minute
from school, I can hear the school bell, so I
only do really have to leave it three. I know,
like two twenty is kind of like a bit of
an alarm bell for me, Like.
Speaker 3 (37:43):
What will we do it in twenty I'll.
Speaker 1 (37:44):
Do like twenty minutes of exercise.
Speaker 2 (37:47):
That counts it percent percent. I think I've had a
mindset before. They can't go for a proper run, yeah,
a proper hit workout, no point no, no no.
Speaker 4 (37:58):
So you can do things throughout the day which add
up some days.
Speaker 1 (38:01):
What I will do if I've got like.
Speaker 4 (38:03):
Meetings through the day or whatever, I'll start like a
meeting and I'll just do like ten push ups, ten
air squats, and then on the hour, I'll just keep
doing it.
Speaker 1 (38:12):
That adds up.
Speaker 4 (38:13):
It's all about, you know, movement rather than you know,
what we've been conditioned to believe is actually what we
should be doing is thirty to forty minutes of high
intensity of and actually what we need to do is
just move more, yes, and move more regularly, move more
with intention, and it all adds up. Nothing is wasted,
(38:36):
and I think that that's something which i'd like to
kind of shift in people who are busy like yourself,
who you know, might not find the window of ten
minutes is better than no minutes. One minute is better
than no minute. And so that's the thing with never
missing Monday for me is actually sometimes i would get
to eight o'clock at night and I'd be like, I've
(38:56):
done no exercise today or something, and my husband Will
I would say, Oh, we'll do a minute of birth piece.
And it's horrendous, right, it's really great. It's only a
minute of your life in a minute. Everyone's got a minute.
And then what usually happens is, oh, do another minute.
So the hardest thing is to start sometimes a lot
(39:17):
of the time.
Speaker 1 (39:17):
It really is.
Speaker 4 (39:18):
But if you don't start something, you'll never finish. And
so you need to just be we need to be
softer on ourselves as in terms of our expectations of
what exercise is, but also you know, flexible enough to
go actually today, I've got twenty minutes here, or I've
got ten minutes there, I've got five minutes here.
Speaker 1 (39:40):
At it all up. And I'm lucky in a sense.
Speaker 4 (39:43):
That sometimes I do work from home, So I am
just wearing a T shirt short so it's no.
Speaker 3 (39:48):
Way everyone's working from home.
Speaker 4 (39:50):
These days, and I'm putting on a blazer for a
zoom call, you know. But there are movement opportunities throughout
the day for everyone. It's walking to the coffee shop,
it's parking further away. It's actually saying I'm doing this
so I can look after myself, so I can look
after my people. And when you have that clarity of
(40:11):
why you are doing this, why you must do this,
to keep going, to live the life you want to live,
that gets you going.
Speaker 2 (40:19):
I think this is a wonderful place to wrap up
because I think we've come full circle.
Speaker 3 (40:23):
Because what better advice to.
Speaker 2 (40:25):
Give a new mum than to say, take the pressure off,
just do a little bit where you can. It doesn't
have to be a big ordeal.
Speaker 1 (40:32):
Yeah exactly.
Speaker 4 (40:33):
And motherhood is such a journey and you know those
newborn days are so precious, so enjoy it, be kind
to yourself and just you do you.
Speaker 1 (40:43):
We need to talk with Coast FM's Tony Street.
Speaker 4 (40:47):
If you enjoyed the podcast, click to share with family
or friends. To get in touch email, We need to
talk at Coast Online, dot co, dot nz,
Popular Podcasts
40s and Free Agents: NFL Draft Season
Daniel Jeremiah of Move the Sticks and Gregg Rosenthal of NFL Daily join forces to break down every team's needs this offseason.
Dateline NBC
Current and classic episodes, featuring compelling true-crime mysteries, powerful documentaries and in-depth investigations. Follow now to get the latest episodes of Dateline NBC completely free, or subscribe to Dateline Premium for ad-free listening and exclusive bonus content: DatelinePremium.com
Las Culturistas with Matt Rogers and Bowen Yang
Ding dong! Join your culture consultants, Matt Rogers and Bowen Yang, on an unforgettable journey into the beating heart of CULTURE. Alongside sizzling special guests, they GET INTO the hottest pop-culture moments of the day and the formative cultural experiences that turned them into Culturistas. Produced by the Big Money Players Network and iHeartRadio.