Jeopardy!

Jeopardy!:Battle Royale Edition;

Shed World;

An octopus is a bank manager.

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:02):
Welcome back to another episode of Gulls Yea still here.
Let's meet everybody shouting. First up, Tenei, Tenie, what's your
default cuisine if you're going out, like, what food you
just gravitate to? Most of the time, it's typically just
food like burgers, that's the default. He seems so depressed

(00:25):
the way he said that. It's not it's not that
it's my favorite, it's just it's just my default. In fact,
anything other than that is what gets me excited. There
you go, all right, I understand that. Next up, guys,
Mark Agliar here still Mark weird. It's a totally different
day from what we just said the other episode. Two. Uh,

(00:49):
you've played the genie in a Laddin at Disneyland. But
what's your dream role in a musical? Well, if I
had three wishes, Uh No, my dream role in a musical,
the role I have always wanted to play is uh
the master of the house in lame Is. I think

(01:09):
that Tennardier, I think that role is amazing. He has
a song where everyone hoists him up on their shoulders
and sings about how great he is, and ironically I
assume uh, and then uh, and then you pop in
later in the show and you get to do some
evil and then you pop up at the end and
the crowd goes nuts for It's the perfect it's the
perfect musical role and it suits my Um. I am

(01:31):
technically passively singing, uh that I did my in the
as the Genie and Aladdin as well. I've never any
role where I'm not expected to sing particularly great, just passively.
But all those roles for you, like, come in, you
do a couple of scenes, you steal the fucking show,
and then you leave, sort of like the King in Hamilton's.
It's like he he pops in, does his songs, it

(01:53):
kills like he's probably onstage a total of twelve minutes
and the entire mean exactly. Jonathan Groff is sitting backstage
with the game Boy just waiting to go on for Yeah,
it's amazing. Hey. Speaking of Chris Alvarado's here, guys, Chris Alvarado,
what's your coolest or favorite piece of clothing you've ever owned?

(02:15):
I think, um, I think my cardigans are are an
important part of my wardrobe. I know you're a cardigan man, Cole.
I think you're wearing one right now. As a matter
of factum. I have three different colors of these these thin,

(02:38):
beautiful all st cardigans that really you put them on
over jeans, I mean over white shirt and jeans, and
just you transform you, just your tax bracket moves up
a little bit, your coolness moves up a little bit.
People take a little more. Seriously, it's these fucking cardigans.
They are magical. I have in one a navy, I
have one in gray, and I have one in like

(02:59):
a light around and they are magical. And then I
always wear white shoes, right, that's I love white shoes, sneakers, lea.
What can we talk about this a little bit longer?
You bet? Floor? Uh? This cardigans are all Saints. Yeah,
you know they have sewing machines. Uh do you sew
your own cardigans? All Saints? This is like every storefront

(03:24):
is like twelve sewing machines. Hey, guys, checking instruity Here
she's back. What do you gravitate more towards super hot
and sunny or cold and rainy? Like hot and sunny.
I like the I like the clothing for it, and
I like the feeling of it that doesn't bother me.

(03:48):
Being too cold I hate that. And there's something really
punishing about air conditioning cold. There's something very specific about
that kind of cold that is painful as opposed to
just going outside on a brisky day. If I may,
you seem like the type of person, maybe the build

(04:08):
or whatever, that would get cold in a grocery store.
I have to bring a jacket for any store target.
I do run in that way where like I'm always cold.
But then some crazy thing happened, and I think it
started last year in the pandemic, and I don't know
if it's stressed induced or what, but yes, throughout the day,

(04:31):
I'm constantly freezing. And then I hit the bed and
I am sweating my fucking ass off. For a year
and a half, I would wake up multiple times in
the night drenched in sweat. This and I'm freezing all
day long. I have to put I have to make
it so cold for when I sleep now, and I've

(04:52):
asked my doctors, I really have. So I'm like visiting
my thyroid, like what's going on, Um, guys, my thyroid
levels are good, So congratulations, thank you, thank you. I
get it's just homeostasis, you know, like it's either extra
it's one extreme or the other. I'm never just comfortable.
I used to run super cold all the time, and
I run super hot. I think it's like when I

(05:13):
started playing softball years ago. I think just my body
kind of change. But I had to sleep under like
fans and a c R. I play a lot. I mean,
I wasn't doing that much physical stuff before, So maybe
you did it. Hey, last, but not least, Joey Greer
is here. Joey Greer, I hear you're opening a brand
new business on the Santa Monica promenade. What is it? Oh,

(05:36):
it looks like the news is leaked. Why not? All right,
So we're actually have a big unveiling coming up in
mid November. But this is fine to say. This episode
is gonna release around that time anyway. But and i'd
like you all to check it out. Everyone who's who's
listening to podcast that you'd be the prime customers for it.
So we're selling unpackaged raw eggs already open. We shourced

(05:57):
them for you. We know where they at, and like,
if you want to come and be one of the
first people to get these fresh raw opened eggs, please
please come through. And I like that you're calling the
business fresh raw opened eggs that's pretty great. The rents
very affordable. In the promine, I think this is a sound.
I got a really good deal because I had to.

(06:18):
I had to get the lease with the liquor license
are attached to it, even though we don't sell liquor,
so in total I paid for the lease, but like
two point six a million dollars and uh, I what
is it? I'm on a week to week, but it's
pretty good. I'm looking forward to basically egg beaters that
would be in a carton. What are you dumb? Did

(06:39):
you hear what I said? Sorry? I just just trying
to figure it out and I don't get it raw
opened eggs. I regret asking. Let's do a dash show,
shall I. All of our sen suggestions are gathered from
listeners emails from our Patreon v I P. S. To

(07:01):
become a Patreon supporter of the show and enjoy exclusive
content and other perks, just head on over to patreon
dot com slash alchemy this. If you'd like to submit
a scene suggestion via email, please write to the podcast
on our new email address, alchemy this email at gmail
dot com. That's dot com. Seene one is from Patreon,

(07:24):
v I P and Y Montoya Scene suggestion, Jeopardy Battle
Royal Edition. Only one contestant may leave alive. Thanks and
take care. I'm just nervous. I'm sorry. I sweat like
this even if I'm not nervous, but being nervous makes
me sweat even more. Look, I get it. I get

(07:45):
a lot of people come in here, they get nervous.
It's okay, you're a smart guy. You know a lot
of stuff. Right, did you study? Ah, Yeah, you're gonna
be funny. Hold on, I got somebody in my ear. Yeah,
copy that. Anyway, You're gonna be great. Everything's gonna be fine.
Everybody that comes through here is nervous when they get here.
If you know what you're talking about, you're gonna be okay.

(08:07):
Just pick a weapon off this table and three two
vest Is Jeopardy What Today's Contestants from Phoenix, Arizona, Sally
get you guy from I'm sorry, I'm speaking out of

(08:32):
turn here. Guys, this isn't live. We can go back.
We can do this again. Back to one, back to one.
All right, okay, here we go, Here we go. This
is Jeopardy. Contestants Today from Phoenix, Arizona. Sally catching up

(08:58):
from Venice, California, a retail salesman, Mike big Boy. Can
we go back and say, my profession, what the fun
is going on to there? Huh? You told me this
guy was good? What we loose her back and we
get this PSYCHOPATHO doesn't look man, Look okay, we gotta

(09:20):
figure out something. Okay, something good, something fast, because we're
losing ratings. All right, what is going on? What is
going on? Hold on? Hold on, hold on, hold on,
t h to stop, tell him to stop. For God's sakes,
don't stop. Alright, he's not doing great. I understand that.

(09:41):
But he won squid Game. He's the only one who
is right for this. Okay, like he's been there. He's
a little bit messed in the head because of all
the death he saw. But you know that's why we
had to pivot the show, and he's the guy to
take us there. He'll get there, prossell. We shouldn't keep
it just in the show based on what other shows
are popular in the moment you have a crazy see that.
It's I mean, we have to change the sets. We

(10:02):
had to install a blood pool. Okay, this hard is Jeopardy,
which today's contestant from Phoenix, Arizona. I stay at home mom,
Sally Get You Go from Venice, California, a retail salesman,

(10:23):
Mike big Boy from a wild Dog hunter, Gek Sheckle,
and now your hosts for this evening, Mark Gagliardi. Hey, everybody,

(10:45):
welcome to Jeopardy. It's been a fun week. Uh Sally
gets you Gun? Uh Is uh is her first time here.
Mike big Boy uh Is is also here. But Keck
Keck from Alaska. He is just been cruising along and
I've been told that he does want because he is

(11:05):
a grizzly bear, he does want his his money to
be given to him in salmon. So we have readjusted
the board. Uh so now you will notice that instead
of dollar amounts for each of the correct questions, you
will be receiving. Uh. It's it's all listed in salmon.
So why don't we go now to Cole Strap who

(11:26):
is going? Yeah? Mark, Yeah, mine has a salmon marker too,
but I'd like cash. Uh you know what, we can
only pick one between between salmon and cash to the majority,
Yes technically that's the majority, but one's a bear. He
turned that ship off. All they're just gonna do is

(11:47):
kill each other? You know that, right? But also I'm
an easy like the news or sports or something, damn
always putting on the most violent stuff you can. You know,
the news is pretty violent too because they tell the truth.
Uh yeah, well there's a lot of you know, I
learned a lot from Jeopardy. Okay, what do you learn? Uh?

(12:07):
Uh uh? Well what is a good education? Dad? Liberal
arts No that I was answering Jeopardy style that, well,
you learn to talk like an idiot? Then all right?
That it made a goddamn sense, Dad, I want to
compete in Jeopardy Okay, then start working out better start

(12:30):
I was. I was gonna do it by learning. That's
gonna do it by learning and have good answers through everything.
What do you say? They just have a bear is
one of the contestants. It mauls everyone else. Have you
not been? Whatever time you put it on, the bear
is eating someone's Torso yeah, I mean that's true, dad,
But you know what, maybe it just takes the right
kind of answer. I gotta buzz in before a bear.

(12:52):
I got quick reflexes, man, I don't carry whatever you
want to do, I'm gonna go drink a cigarette, I dade,
why do you always count when it comes to parent
And so you have come to the top of this
mountain with this flower intact seeking wisdom. Yes, you want
to be a contestant on Battle Royal Jeopardy? Is that it? Yeah? Yeah,

(13:18):
it's cold, and I don't know how much longer I
can keep this flower in tech. Stop cold cold? This
is cold to you. What's cold is watching another contestant
have his heart ripped out as he's trying to determine
the difference between a tuba and a sousaphone. That's cold. Oh,
it's just hard to breathe up here, hard to breathe.

(13:40):
I'll tell you when it's hard to breathe. It's hard
to breathe when you're standing on that stage underneath those
blue k neon lights, wondering which of the Brontes wrote
which book. That's when it's hard to breathe. Oh, go
get Rasal goes robes sure, Oh, Philip Ras goes. Why
don't do that? Wonder? Hell? Am I going to become

(14:01):
an assassin? Sucks? Everything you've asked me the entire single time,
and nothing. I'm still still just doing those goddamn quote work.
Stupid like assassin's in my ass People just get to
go to jeopard I know that the journey has seemed long,
all right, but you already are an assassin. You just
don't know it. Huh iri Am, that's right. Drop the

(14:27):
water buckets. Well ye see that guy up on the
ledge there who has no name, nor will he ever
have one, because he is not important, I think, so
look at him. Okay, take up this blow dark all
right now. I know you don't think you know how

(14:49):
to do this, but aim Hi in a second, and
this is how you die. I don't know, Mark, I
guess my mama. Their instincts just took over and I

(15:09):
reaped the throat out of that grizzly Hi feeling great.
That is impressive, Sally, and that gets you you know what.
We can switch the board back now, thank goodness. No
longer does that mean two d salmon. That means two
thousand dollars come in your way. Somebody clear this kick
mess out of here. And uh it's time now for

(15:30):
double jeopardy. Uh. So let's take a look at the board.
Uh double Jeopardy round coming up right now. Uh and
uh col Strat is going to read off all of
our categories Potent Potables, Oscar winners of nineteen seventy two,

(15:52):
How will you glad to see me? The Pacific Northwest?
And Bible books and animation? All right, Sally, you just
killed a bear, so you get to choose from those
categories first. Okay, I'm gonna go with Oh you're gonna
see me for six D please? All right? Then? Can

(16:17):
I switch to a crossbow? You judges? Well, there you go.
The fucking bear is dead. Okay, the bear is dead?
Did you're happy? Can we just go back to regular jeopardy? No?
Who said that? Did someone whist? Who said that? Look
you're talking to the wrong guy. I'm the voice of

(16:39):
Jeopardy and I'm very good at it. Okay, I don't
make the rules here. I don't know who lives, who dies?
We do. We're talking to one of the executive producers.
Oh no, but well, where where's Henry? Where the hell
was the my other producer I was talking to? He's gone, okay,

(17:01):
thank you, We're where can we find Henry? What are
you doing? Yes? We are? I tell you when we're doing.
I should I could be in the secret. The producer
was my idea that was your idea? Huh huh, Wait
a second, I just took a ship. Okay, let me
find Henry. Let me just find Henry. Where is ghole?

(17:28):
That is correct? The owls of goa? Who is the
correct answer? Uh? Select again? Once again, I'm putting potables
I before e Ecademy Award winners of ninety two owl puns,
the Pacific Northwest, and Bible Stories in Animation. Can I
go with Putton putting? Oh? You you you set a

(17:56):
category name incorrectly. Unfortunately, that does mean you have to
on the gauntlet. Let's get the gauntlet's set up, turn
around behind you, just get All you gotta do is
get from point to point. You don't have to. It
will actually cock. You don't have to do the sounds
it it actually it actually will cock. Yes it will.

(18:20):
So just get from point A straight down there to
the end. Just get past all of those hooded figures
in you'll be ready to go back in and get
your potent potables question. Tonight's hooded figures are brought to
you by Mattel Toys. Toys Toys. Okay, kids, so you
all have won the contest, all right, now you're gonna

(18:41):
be in there. You're gonna be in the gauntlet and
your job, okay, your job is gonna be to make
sure that one of the contestants, all right, doesn't make
it to the end. All right. So okay, okay, the
it is a little mean. You can't you can't. Yeah,
you can tickle them now, remember, Okay, they have a

(19:03):
twelve gage Remington shotgun. All right. Okay, yeah, they're gonna
use it. They only have three shots though, all right,
So also spread out. I'm sorry, why are you back
at the orphanage? You took six kids earlier this week? Yeah,
well we need some more, all right. We don't just

(19:24):
give them out. I don't know, man, Look I just
picked it up and I bring it back. This isn't
for Battle Royale Jeopardy, is it. I don't know. I mean,
we want these kids to go to a home and
be raised and loved. Okay, uh sixty what do we say?

(19:50):
Sixty dollars ten thousand for kids? That's what you want?
All right? Is that deal? It? Over? It over? And
Sally has made it through the gauntlet back to Double Jeopardy.
Well done, Sally. Here is your potent Potables answer for

(20:14):
three hundred dollars. This uh, this spirit born in Oh no,
I I read the question wrong. Now I have to
run through the gauntlets. Well I know what that means,
don't I'm sure do Mark? All right, I've just got
to get from this end to that end. Has today's

(20:35):
hooded figures? I brought to you by toys? Alright, Egglin's best.
We've lost our sponsorship deal with Jeopardy. Our farm fresh
eggs are the best eggs. But evidently they don't want
to put them on our show anymore. It's just toys now.
Oh god, well can we do? Can we put little toys?
Is to the eggs? That? The problem is, it's so

(20:58):
much work and in a typical American's life, you don't
have time to open up the eggs. We gotta get
these eggs open. If there was a store that sold fresh,
raw opened eggs, I think that went so so many issues. Look,
I gotta clear my head. I'm gonna go for a
walk on the Santa Monica provenade out there. All right,

(21:19):
but you got a promise to come back because we
don't have the keys. Okay, So just because if you
live and he made it through the gumlet, just a reminder,
Mike big Boy is still in the Game's boy, it's Bigoy.
Be a silent all right? That three you three clue

(21:42):
in Potent Potables? Is name a beer? Deep? Oh, Mike
big Boy, what is Budweiser? That is correct? What is Budweiser?
Is correct? I'm sorry. I'm still a little shaken from
that last gauntlet run. You haven't run the house, Mike,

(22:02):
not run the gauntlet yet. This is bullshit, you guys.
But first we lose Eggland's best, then we lose Mattel
and Mike as Mike, you know what? Fuck this, Mike, turnaround? Turnaround, Mike,
turn around. You're going through that gauntlet. You're going through
that gauntlet right now. And here here's your weapon. It's
a frying pan. Enjoy your battle. Today's hooded figures are

(22:26):
brought to you by Snacks and that's our first seeing. Everybody.
See two is from listening to mc kentonwell, who wrote
a p K. I don't know if everyone remembers the
would you rather episode decapitation via Lion Dangley, mead offf

(22:48):
a live Wire, et cetera. But I found something Craig
may recall is being too carb riche at the O
C Fair Anyway, my c suggestion is based on a
nine acre superstore off I fifteen from late in Vegas
that my girlfriend has always wanted to stop that but
never did. Shed World, Thanks very much and love from
across the pond. McCoy. Alright, so we got the straws

(23:14):
all in, all right, get iron sightings, aluminum sightings. I
see you all right, and let's see what else you
good here? Okay, yeah, buddy, and okay, excuse me, I
was honking outside. I thought somebody would come help me.
What's what's your problems? My problem? I don't have a problem.

(23:36):
I have a need. What's your need? Shed? Well, you're
the right places the shed world. I need something for outdoors,
all weather purposes. I could I could store my um
lawnmower and such. Sounds like you're looking for a shed. Yes,
thank you. I'm finally being hurt. Yes, shed m okay,

(24:00):
o weather, I'll purpose lawn more. You said more bodies,
a lot more, a lot more body. Yeah, okay, so
like you're working on a lot more is a right,
that's right? Yeah? Okay, okay, you're gonna want to go
down to ill b two it's gonna have everything you
need for sure. Yeah, pretty large. Right here, you can

(24:23):
borrow one of the like we have many hummers you
can jump in and then just drive right over there.
Very cool. Thank you. That was what I'm sorry B two,
thank you. Excuse me, sir. Yeah, I was wondering when
the shed show was happening, that should the shed Show
should be happening a little bit. Yeah. Yeah, you'll see

(24:45):
it right over there at the ponchos for the splash zone.
Or do I need to go run out and get
some of those no know, we sell them, We sell them. Yeah,
we can get them either a right at checkout or
if you go right by the actual auditorium that we're
selling them right outside. Amazing. Thank you. Can you believe
that this is my first time at shed World. I
can welcome. That's amazing. I've been to my local shed aquarium,

(25:07):
but I've never actually been to shed World. Um, but
I've been wanting to go and thinking about ever since
i was a kid. Yeah. Well, it's it's different than
shed Land as well. Shed World has everything. We got
sheds from all around the world. Uh yeah, we also
got sheds at the future, so it's great, so you
should check it out. Yeah, everyone said shed Land is
the original, but everyone knows shed World is where it's

(25:28):
at because excuse me, excuse me, excuse me. I'm a
shed World annual pass holder. Can you please clear out
of the way. I have a question. Yes, you're cast
member here at shed World. Yes, do you know? If
do you know if mike A is doing the shed
Show today? Mikey is actually not tooing today. He's come

(25:48):
down with something. So but you're gonna enjoy it. You're
gonna it's always Bryce when it's not mike A. And
I don't like the way Bryce does the Shed Show.
I'm leaving. Sorry, excuse me, I've done the books, Son.
We just can't compete with shed World being right across

(26:09):
the freeway. We're gonna have to close better off shed Oh,
come on, Paul. This is a family, family business. Paul. Look,
I I want to keep it open, but I just
don't think we can afford it. Unless I don't know,
something was to happen til shed World across the street.

(26:31):
There are you suggesting, Paul that I that somebody should
do something about it? Oh? I don't know if I'm
suggesting it wink wink up. But somebody ought to do
something about it maybe, or we're not gonna have a
business son, all right, the people you seek on top
of the mountain, it was fun to blue flower and

(26:53):
bring that to them unbroken. Do you understand? Oh yeah,
a blue flower, bring it to the top of the mountain. Yes,
and then that's gonna How was that going to help
me assassinate? Don't say that allowed. Look, I'm not I

(27:14):
can't tell you much more about what I don't know,
but what I do know is exactly what you've heard.
Do you understand? Or any blue flower? No, the flower
from the mountain. Not any blue flower, just the flower
that you'll find on the mountainside. Trust me, when you're
walking up you'll see it. Very rare. You never see
anything here. Yes, right the freeway B one, B two. Oh,

(27:41):
can't see let's see you. Sorry, I didn't see you there. Hi.
Did you want a balloon animal? No? Thanks, just looking
for all purpose ship, okay? Or I mean I could
I guess I could do a blue animal. Really, no
one ever comes to be too. I've been standing out

(28:05):
here for so long, just waiting for someone to come
by that I could make a balloon animal for Is
this your first time at shed World? Uh? It is, yeah,
it is. Well, I'm gonna make you something special. What's
your favorite animal? Little boy? Have you ever tried to
get rid of a body and be honest with what?

(28:26):
Be honest with me? Like a like a person's body? No, no,
I'm honest with me. I I've never been people in
my life I've wanted to see gone, but nobody i'd
ever actually get rid of. And why is that? Why

(28:46):
live in a society with rules? Now? Would you like
a dog? Or at your raft which is really like
a dog, but I just make the neck longer. My
question to you is, if you were to get rid
of a body and in a which one of these
sheds would you choose? Now you're a cast member, you
must know I'm not the right person ask this question.

(29:07):
The dominic dominic Listen to me. Let's started interrupt listen
to Okay, you're gonna have to work another sixteen hours.
They just stand by the way. We're done sending new balloons.
You're gonna to figure out a way to get him
yourself piece of ship. Thank you, Mr t. It's your
first time seeing the Shed show. It's my first time
at shed World. This show is amazing. It's about three

(29:30):
and a half hours and it closes with a twenty
minute set from shed Zeppelin. You're gonna love it. I
heard that Bryce is a bit of a dud. Yeah,
he's not great, but he tries. But if I have
nothing to compare it to, then I'm sure I'll love it.
Don't give a ship that you were the former voice

(29:50):
of Jeopardy. All right, you got a job to do. Now, Okay,
where's mike A? Where's's Mike A? Mikey is sick. I
don't know what to tell you. Who gets sick anymore?
Is that even a thing anymore? Mike shouldn't have eaten
all those raw eggs. You ate so many eggs that

(30:11):
have been left out. Mike A is splitting. Did you
see that? He's splitting like like an egg. It's splitting.
Oh my god, there's two my keys. We we we
have to hold this ging. Okay, shed World might be
able to use it to some kind of purported I

(30:31):
said it's wrong. No no, no, no no. Welcome to
shed World. Welcome to Joy, Welcome to share World. Boys,
Thank you so much. We'll see the next person. Thank

(30:51):
you so much, thank you for auditioning for Shed World today.
I don't know if we're going to find anyone, honestly,
I know, and you know, if they don't find anyone,
they're going to kill us. I was going to say
we could fill in and finally actually want to Oh
my god, you have to be great. Sorry, I don't know,
I freaked out so dark desiree. Oh my god, I know.

(31:14):
I just as society with rules, you know, like what
if somebody they are just broken, and then people can
just do whatever the hell they want. Well, what about
getting where to Mr? T M. I don't know what,
don't you know? Well he did just tell me I
had to stay and work in extra sixteen hours without balloons.

(31:36):
The balloons have been getting expensive, and that that really
cuts into my what kind of what kind of hiding
are we talking about? Well? I can push this call
for assistance button, he'll come this way. We will kill
him what right here at the store, or will lure

(31:58):
him into this this this shed, this one looks nice,
heavy duty double pain. Nobody will hear it, nobody will
smell it. I'm pressing the button. I'm not stopping you.
I brought most most of the flowers still intact. It's uh, um, well,

(32:21):
one pedal came off, one pedal came off, but I
have it in right here, and with a little bit
of glue, I think I could put them all to
the other. Pick up those buckets of water, these two,
these two, yes, yes, of course they're full. Keeps flushing.
Oh well, son, I'm sorry that that fucking flower bullshit

(32:44):
didn't work out for you. In the meantime, I got
you an audition for the shed Show, which might be
our way in. Oh what we got to do for
the audition? Well, you gotta sing the beloved Shed Show Sean,
which that was a great version of the Sheds thro

(33:10):
the Hi, how long are you guys? You pressed the
call first? First, I'm wan to come up this Yeah. Um,
I was just wondering, can you open this shed? I
would love to see that. That's not Mr can you
open this shed? I would? Mr T has the keys
for those I don't. I don't have those keys. Well,
so how do am I supposed to look inside of it?

(33:30):
I can get Mr T? No? Good, Mr T? What
are you doing? We had a specific what do you mean?
It doesn't matter. We had a specific reason for getting
rid of Mr T. But this she's nice? Fine? Is
everything all right? Yes? Could you please just go get

(33:51):
Mr T. Janni's again. Yes, I'm not No one has
the keys besides Mr Mr T. Just the way our
society works here, isn't that weird to you? Shouldn't you
be trusted? Um? I guess I don't mind. It's just
you should mind. You seem smart. I am Have you

(34:13):
ever killed somebody? Well, it's now, do we get Mr T? Please? Sure? Dominic?
Are you okay? I think so okay, I'm gonna go.
Oh my god, Bryce Ay. I was at the Shed show. Hi.
I'm a huge fan. Hi. Thanks, thanks, this is my

(34:37):
first time here at Shed World. It's so probably why
you like me. If you saw Mike, you'd be a
Mike a fan. But well, I'm a huge fan of yours.
I think that you did such a great job when
you rode that shed through that tank. I was just
I was overwhelmed. It's crazy. Thank you, thank you. Anyway,

(34:57):
I'm just having out. Do you do you have any
I'm do you have a couple of books for gas? Um?
I I'm so sorry. I just have like credit card
and then Hey, Bryce, we're sawing uh CCTV. It looks
like you're stealing money from a customer. World, Yeah, guilty

(35:21):
is charged? Come on, what are you doing that? She
didn't didn't have any cash? She says, she didn't have
any cash, And then I reached into her purse. Well,
I pulled her person away from her, dislocating her shoulder. Sure,
and then I reached into the person. What did I find?
What do I find? What did I find? It looked
like a handful of cash, A handful of cash, A
handful of cash, A handful of cash. Son, Never mind,

(35:44):
I don't think you need to do anything that. It's
a total fucking mess over there. I don't think their
business model is sustainable and it might just be weeks
before shed world. Just oh, I said it wrong, and
that's their seconds. See three is from Patreon v I

(36:07):
P Bobby Williams, who wrote, Hey, Kevin and or Cole
the stratus your straton. Hey, I gotta shout out thank you.
You guys never failed to make me laugh. So here's
another suggestion for your whimsical ways. Help. My octopus is
a bank manager. I love you all, Bobby, So what
kind of enemy looking for. I wanted an octopus hold on.

(36:33):
My daughter does not understand the responsibility of an octopus.
I want a teacher. I want my octopus to teach.
I want my octopus teacher. Thinks that octopuses are so smart.
I know they are, and they and they're clairvoyant, and
they can call games, and that's really what I wanted for.
I'm getting into the gambling. Have you ever been on

(36:55):
sports all the time? That's why I lost this. Look
at that popping out. It's fine, that's not the you
know what. I don't want you to encourage her. I've
been trying to get her away from gambling, away from
these I don't know if me popping my eye I
was an encouragement, you know what I mean. But look
at how fans fantasized. She loves it. I don't know

(37:19):
what the word is I'm looking for, but she's definitely
not deterred by your missing eye. I gotta say, man,
to put it that whole thing on me when I
just met her and like, you know, probably years if
you're talking to her, you know what I mean. I
don't know if it's tell me, you know what I mean.
Let's go and look, whoa, whoa, Just get a goldfish
or get a get a what are those sucker fishes?

(37:40):
To go to the side of the tank. Those are good. Ah,
this is just what I can do now. I don't know.
I just sell goldfishes and octopus to teach me about
the sports. Thinking. It looks like he knows we're talking

(38:01):
about him. He does. He's tink tink tinking on this.
I told you they're very, very smart. Gave a little
spoon in there. So Hi, guys, Oh sorry, it's not
that surprised to me. It does not. There he goes,
he's going away. Well he's got a job. Hey, gang,

(38:21):
it's my last day. Is you manage you here? It's
Sacramento Golden One Credit Union? Yeah, sorry, boss, I'm bumped two.
I gotta leave. My wife died running the gauntlet. I
got a lot of family situation to clean up. So
you know, look, it's better great fifteen years. You're all

(38:42):
like family, don't we really love your boss? Don't tear up,
you're gonna crying something. Hi, everybody, I just to say
I'm looking forward to working with you as your new manager. Huh.

(39:05):
Think of me as a new friend, colleague. Yeah, I
think of you is not a human respect. That's fair.
But I have some ideas to make this place a
better work environment and change things right away. Huh. I's
thinking like free vending machines to start off with. Let
me guess you want all of us to go and

(39:25):
side of this tiny bottle too. Huh. Well, we got bones, buddy,
We're not gonna be able to fit and tie these bottles.
On the contrary, I was thinking, because you have so
many bones, maybe a weekly free massage would be nice
for you guys. That's pretty that sounds good. I'm listening. Well,
you can say you buy to your friend and we'll
talk later. I want you guys to show Mr. Suckers

(39:47):
the same respect you showed me all those years. All right, Look,
we're really gonna miss your boss. He's promising some pretty
nice stuff to start off. Yeah, I mean, you know,
give him a chance. I know it's not the usual
kind of guide district, but said ding ding dinging. Hey, look,
I know i'm your pet, but I do have to

(40:08):
get to work, you understand, right. I Well, um, I
just I feel like you haven't really been teaching me anything.
Actually I did. I did your math homework for me
doesn't teach me. It just gives me the answers. But
how will I ever learn? You're super smart? You don't

(40:29):
need me to teach you. You're right, I didn't want
an octopus teacher. What lindsay? These scores are off the chart.
I've never seen anything like it. We're gonna put you
in a higher aptitude class. That congratulations, Thank you. But
I feel like I could probably just stay here and
have a better time. Well, I don't think so. I

(40:51):
think the best thing for you is to go to
this class. Well what about this. If the Ravens beat
the Eagles, I stay in this Matthew class. And if
the Eagles beat the Do you see these trucks they're
going back and forth business entire like aquatic like highway
or sometimes the hell it is that? It's you know

(41:14):
those um living bridges for animals, Like, yeah, it's like that,
but for amphibious and water dwelling animals. And put me
in the higher science. Hey, employees, UM, I'm not having
a great day today, as you can tell. Miss. One

(41:37):
of my tentacles is missing. My my owner got mad
at me, but she didn't mean she didn't really mean
to do all this damage, but an abusive relationship with
your owner? Mr Suckers, How do you know if you're
in one? What are your dentacles missing? And then you, uh,
well I did I did her homework and I didn't
show her how to do it, and you went back

(41:59):
to work. I told you you couldn't go back to
work until you regenerated that tentacle. It's gonna come back. No,
I know you know that you leave here with one missing?
Do you know how that makes me look? We should
look like a piece of ship. I'm sorry that you
want Lucy un come in. Yeah, of course, Dad, what's up.

(42:22):
It's just that your mother and I are downstairs and
we keep hearing you cursing. Oh I'm sorry, Yeah, it's
And here's the thing. Can can he hear me right now? Yeah? Okay, Well,
let's let's step out really quick. Just step out of
the room really back. You can tell me anything in

(42:44):
front of him. Well, we're together. So he works at
the same bank that I work at. What. Yeah, he's
the bank manager, and it's like kind of important that
he gets back in there. You know, That's why I
keep driving him over there. Honey, I thought you just

(43:06):
I thought he liked car rides, and fuck, I can't
have him splitting his focus. I really I need people.
You you cut his arm off. I'm not sure that.
I don't know that that's how he's not an earth form.
He's not in a regenerative animal. Al Right, here's an

(43:28):
inky old fashioned for your suckers. You look rough day,
huh rough day? Oh yeah, you know it's okay, though,
it's okay. Uh, it's okay, it's gonna gonna be okay.
It's okay, right, I'm okay, Okay. Look around in this
bar man, everybody they look happy content that comes in here.

(43:52):
You're the only one that comes in here like this,
and it's it's getting worse. Man, look at you got
two nubs now, I got bills to pay, you know,
like had a lot of people counting on me. I
got employees that that they have families. You don't, they
have actual families. So if if that means I gotta
take a little abuse, be a little stressed, so be it.
I'll take another one place. I gotta cut you off, suckers,

(44:16):
take another one, suckers. Come on, man, come on, look
at you. Take a good look in the mirror. There
I see a step full of pod that doesn't take
itself too seriously, that doesn't believe in itself. All right,
So what do I do? Well? You do? You go home?

(44:36):
You stand up for yourself. You've got a little beak,
use it. Oh yeah, I forget about this thing. Thanks,
Mr Guaser. Listen. I know that the Ravens didn't win,
but okay, if the Titans beat the and I don't
know what the your name is? I lost a ship. Okay,

(44:58):
it was a guarantee the Okay, okay, how many money
got them? They're gonna come. They're gonna kill me open,
come down, come down, kill me, kill me, kill me,
kill me, kill me. Say sounds like you're in a predicament.

(45:21):
Maybe you could bet me what the funk I thought?
You're supposed to be fucking smart? How the funk am
I gonna bet you? Well, some people might think I'm
worth something. And if you then understand how betting works,
you need to either like bet on a win or
a lose, or team for mothers for a certain amount

(45:41):
of points. I barely know how it works, but it's
definitely not wholl whoa look good is Lindsey Lucy coming in.
You're gonna finally pay your debt? Or what's going on? Well?
Why is that backpack? Wet as funk? What's going what
is this? I don't have cash, per se, but I
do have a bag full of something very valuable. It

(46:05):
better be wet diamonds. It's well, just it's it's an octopus.
It's an octopus, but it's an extremely smart octopus. This
octopus can can juggle your balance, your book. I can
help you get rid of the other families, if that's
what you're looking for. What is it? What do you mean?

(46:28):
I can expand your territories. I could triple your income
by the end of the year. Kill off all your enemies,
but only if they're in water. Yeah, no, no, anybody.
Put them on the ground, on the ground. Put me here,
I'm sure all right. Give him my hand gun, give

(46:49):
him my hand. Wait, I can't. That's not how this
is gonna work. Jeez, how many bodies do you need
to hide in the shed? I need to hide somewhere
around Let's say a baker's doesn't Does that make sense?
So why don't we add a couple more? Does that
make sense? Sure? I mean, is the square footage of

(47:11):
the shed's gonna make the difference here. Hey, money, there's
no issue here. We just need to hide these bodies
and the ship. Do you know what I mean? Yeah,
you exactly said what you need to do. I know
exactly what you mean. Uh, sure, this shed here should work. Well,
what are these bodies so wet and covered? A little
suction cup marks? Let's just say not to push that

(47:31):
we hired recently has been doing a lot of killing force.
You don't know. You just said that. So, yes, I
understand you didn't have to bring the bodies here. You
could have just got the guests of it, and I
could have brought the shed to you. I'm not gonna
go back and forth. I'm gonna do that, all right,
I'm not gonna do that. I think, I think Lucy. Um, yeah,

(47:56):
I haven't seen you around lately. Yeah, I'm trying to
really straighten out. I'm trying to graduate. There are things
I need to focus on. Hey, I'm proud of you.
Oh my god. And then he died O ship? Oh

(48:17):
my god? This is what does what does it mean?
Lucy Lindsey, I'm sorry. That's not an excuse for why
your paper is late because you went to jail and
your octopus died when you were talking to it. Yeah,
and he said I'm proud of you. And then he
he didn't just die, I mean he kind of levitated
works like it was. It was mostly the jail thing.

(48:42):
But hey, guys, I'm back to take over the bank.
Thank you. My kids got the therapy they needed and
I'm back to work. And nails on my feet fell off.
Nails and my feet fell off because water logged for
so long. Round, boy, you won't believe what you missed. Boss,

(49:05):
Oh boy, tell me about it. Shi octopus murdered. Uh, well,
you know what, there's actually a lot of do you
want all of them? Well, you know what, let's save
that for break time. Boys. Now let's get out there, finest. Yeah,
it's gonna take a lot longer than break Yeah, I
mean long drawn out thing that happened here. Yeah, he's

(49:28):
a very involved. But we did get massages that we
did get those massages. Yeah, and the great why don't
we tell me all about it after the show ends. Okay,
the show is three and a half hours long. I'm
not gonna sit the whole thing, boss, And just wait,
it's Bryce doing it. He has an extra twenty minutes

(49:48):
of extra stuff and the worst and that's our show.
What everybody made? Perfect sense, really strong character for an octopus.
I have to say, Mark Gagliardi, Yeah, thanks for having me.
This was this was a treat. It's always a treat
to see you guys. UM find me online at mark Gags.

(50:12):
We got this with Mark and Holle. New episodes dropping
every week on Maximum Fun and Blood and Treasure season
two coming very soon to CBS. Heck, yeah, James, thanks
for having me. Check out Game Front on YouTube. We're just,
you know, keeping up with the games that keep just
coming out. Yes, and I don't think you need to

(50:35):
say thanks for having me, as you are a defaultcast member.
I have to bag every time. I have to beg
every time I'm on the chopping block. Chris Alvarado, Yeah,
thanks for having me. It's funny and this is this
is I'm not I'm nothing funny, but I just I
just heard to two words, James. You say egg and

(50:57):
big egg and bags post like egg and beag. That's
interesting anyway, so you can u um if you want
to see me. Look, I just finished my fourth Costco
pumpkin pie. Okay, I'm starting on my fifth Costco pumpkin
pie today at christ Barando on Instagram. I don't know

(51:18):
why I'm doing this. It used to be fun and cute.
Now it's just kind of weird and sad. But I'm
gonna keep doing it. I'm gonna eat ten full Costco
pumpkin pies by Thanksgiving. That's my promise to you. And
you do it with whipped cream. I saw it. I
just started adding the whip cream. Yeah. So are you
Are you needing to add like another flavor to it?
Is it getting like you just can't taste it? Or no?

(51:39):
I'm telling you this is the secret, man. That's what
I'm wondering. Every time you open the fridge and you're like, oh,
I'm gonna have a snack whatever, and the pies there,
you're stoked, Like it doesn't it's not getting worse, it's
not getting bad, it's not getting tired. You're like, oh fuck,
I have pumpkin pie. Uh. And the whip cream was
just because you know it's it's good that way. But
I'm not. I'm not in any trouble. Although somebody did say,

(52:02):
like you're gonna get really fat and what I wanted
to say is you know I'm showing how many pies.
I mean, you Mark right, I'm not showing these workouts.
I'm not showing these hit sessions. I'm not showing the box.
I don't do any of those. Way to that, Shane,
like you want you yea one life man, and if
you want to decrease your life expectation, do it. You

(52:23):
know if you want to stop it early, is you?
I totally understand. Well, Chris, it was nice to you
to join us for your last couple of shows. Jackie again, Zellas, Ruthie, Well,
thank you for having me. I having a great time.
This is a blast that was always I'm at Jackie, Ruthie,
and I'm also I was going to talk Christmas movies

(52:47):
starting in November on the most wonderful pot of the year.
But guess what, We're starting a week early, at the
end of October. We're starting with with this with a
spooky movie. I won't tell you which one. Why should I?
You know what I will? You're so easy to break,

(53:08):
you will? You don't have to, you don't have But
I thought at first, I was like, well, we usually
released it like the week before and a little bit
of anticipation. But let's just I'll give you a clip.
The word spooky is in the title. This way we're
both satisfied. Okay, thank you, spooky elf. Good job. I

(53:37):
got into fixing motorcycles recently, not mine, a couple of
my neighbors. They don't know I'm doing it, and I'm
just working on the pipes, working on the tires and
so for so good. I'm really I love it. It's
hard to doing the DNA nite it's getting so cold,
but uh yeah, hopefully I'll be opening up my own
shop soon. I'm looking forward to the awesome next to

(53:58):
the egg shop I have at Cold Strandon at Strand
and call on Socialist. Go to s sketch Fest dot com.
Very soon the line up will be out for twentie anniversary,
which I hope to god happens in January. Big thanks
to our engineer and producer Doug Baby and the fine
folks at I Heeart Media dot com. Please write to

(54:20):
us at Alchemy this email at gmail dot com. That's Alchemy.
Until next time,