Part Two: A Complete History of the Illuminati

We conclude the story of Adam Weishaupt and talk about how the Illuminati went from nerd club to the USAs favorite conspiracy theory.

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:02):
Oh we're back. It's behind the bastards, Sophie. I'm going
to do that many more times. Um. You know, I
I think the audience likes that. Just like they like
my flawless Boston accent. They also like updates from my life,
so I want to let them know. I finished decorating
my living room. You know, ever since I got my house,

(00:23):
I've been wondering what to do now that I have
a TV with this this huge screen in the middle
of my life. Because it didn't feel right for it
to only exist for TV. I wanted it to be
kind of a perpetual art project. So I found an
on the internet archive a complete repository of every episode
of Walker Texas Ranger, and I have it set up

(00:44):
so that they're just always playing on my television, even
when it's off. So anytime I turn on my TV,
there's just automatically Walker Texas Ranger happening, just a low
res It looks like TV's from the nineties used to look,
and it's it's really done. Wonders for my mental health,
just that it's a little health hack for all of
you people. I don't know if wonders is the right word.
It has had an impact on your mental health. It

(01:06):
sure has had an impact. I've learned how to do
roundhouse kicks, which I've I've I've come to support as
like the primary method by which society should be organized.
I think that's my illuminati. It's all going to be
roundhouse kick based. I mean, honestly, be an imbrovement. Yeah,
it's it's pretty good. Um, some of the most racist

(01:27):
things I've ever seen. Um, there's there's an episode that's
like set in the past when they're all cowboys and
like Walker's partner in the TV show is like in
the normal show is like a black Texas ranger And
in the episode in the past, he's a former slave
who was taught how to be a doctor by his master.
And when he tells the Mormon missionaries they're hanging out

(01:48):
with it he used to be a slave, They're like, oh,
that's so terrible, and he's like, no, it was fine.
It is wild. The things you used to get away
with on nineties Steefee, Yeah, good stuff, good stuff. Margaret
kill Joyce, have you ever created a secret society? God

(02:11):
damn it, you were just telling us about this, so
I know, yeah, I know. Okay, so I like ten
years ago backed you up, Magpie, you have obligation to
tell this story. No, no, it's it's fine. The worst
the consequences of starting secret society have already happened, which
is that we started a secret society. We've We've put

(02:34):
out a pamphlet we claimed to have been around for
several thousand years. We distributed it at a few places. Yeah, yeah, exactly,
and that's why I was like laughing so hard. It's
like I was like, what an asshole? Why would you
do that? And in the back it had this, you know,
if you would like more information, please write to the
following physical address, because we decided that that was like

(02:55):
spookier than an email address, you know. Um. And then
within six months, the house that was that the address
burned down. Oh do you know why? I don't know.
I have no idea why the house burned down. Okay, curious,
huh law interesting? Yeah, should should have bought a po

(03:17):
box huh yeah. Yeah, it was a it was an
amateur mistake. Yeah. That's why people cannot currently send us anything.
As a fan post on the subreddit that their package
got sent back, it's because we need to get a
po box set up, but that would this is leaving
my house. This is Secret Society advice one oh one,
get a box, or use the address of an enemy,

(03:41):
maybe someone who you think is like at risk of
losing their mind, and just have them suddenly receive hundreds
of letters from strangers around the world. You think they're
the center of a conspiracy. That's actually where the story
will end in like three or four episodes. That so
tracks very clearly. We're talking about the the Aluminati, which
has just been formed by Adam Weishop, and he has

(04:02):
decided the way to save the world is to lie
to a bunch of rich people and make them think
they're wizards so he can buy nice books. That is
the center of the actual Illuminati conspiracy theory. So there
is a conspiracy theory. It's just a lot funnier than
I think most people tend to believe. So one of

(04:23):
the things that's interesting to me is that kind of
like as the organization changed over time, the main thing
about it, because Adam goes through some ideological shifts himself.
The main thing that's consistent about the Illuminati is that
he's lying to nearly everyone in it, right, That's like
the most, like the part of it that carries through
the most. So he recruits a couple of dozen people successfully,

(04:48):
but then kind of like stalls out and can't get
more people. And he gets some advice that like, well,
maybe if you join the Masons, you could like recruit
people from within the Masons and that would allow us
to like get some more blood in the organization. So
he owns joins a Masonry organization, like a Masonic lodge
in munich Um, and his plan there is he wants

(05:09):
to like rise up high enough that he can get
his own official lodge and started an ingolstat and then
kind of move the Illuminati into this Masonic lodge that
he creates and just have this Masonic lodge actually be
the Illuminati. So he's basically trying to like incept a
secret society within the Freemasons because it will help him recruit.
I mean, so it's entry ism. It's like the yeah,

(05:31):
the communist tendency of entryism. Like this sort of thing
happens a lot with these like esoteric groups and these
secret societies and orders like this. This this style of
growing your own little weird cult is very consistent. Like
this is this is a technique that gets used like
even even even till today, but across a lot of

(05:51):
the different kind of orgs that popped up that were
like inspired by the Illuminati and by the Freemasons. This
this thing happened a lot. This yes, this style nesting
doll of conspiracy society exactly exactly like joining joining one
group to like feed off their members and start your
own branch off organization. And it's like it's very very consistent. Yeah, nothing,

(06:11):
this says, this is a popular idea, Like there's only
a tiny number of people are willing to do this.
So we have to snipe each other. So we have
to steal from another. We have to we have to
like is it is it actually a magpie? That's that
bird that like lives in the nest of another bird?
We have to do that. Oh no, that's Isn't that
the cuckoo? Is that the cuckoo? I'm not good at birds?
Magpie steal ship. Welcome to Behind the Book to podcast

(06:34):
where we get into where Robert where Robert lists the
two facts about birds that he knows. Um so one
of the it brings in this works really well and
the fact that like he is now recruiting through a
Masonic lodge for the Illuminati, and everyone knows who the
Masons are. This brings in hundreds of new members, and

(06:55):
one of these new members is a twenty eight year
old diplomat from Hanover named a do Knig Knig. It's
really weird, k n Igge. I'm just gonna pronounce it
the way that that feels best to me. I don't care.
So secret societies and fraternities had been the coolest organizations
in Knnig's world when he was a little kid. Um,

(07:16):
he is a secret society nerd, and so as a
teen he's reading everything he can about these new fraternal
organizations spreading around Europe. He describes himself as a child
as stricken with our era's greatest disease, a yearning for
secret connections and orders. As a little boy, he'd actually
created his own secret society and invited his friends to join.
They'd worn silver cross pendance and drawn up a list

(07:38):
of by laws. I think I'm certain they excluded girls.
Um it is. There's there's a very like Calvin and
Hobbes aspect to this guy's childhood. Um, I hope they
used a po box. Yeah, this child's house burned down
after distributing its neighborhood in a lineage of secret mystics

(08:00):
dating back to Anostic period. So Connig had maybe Connig
was a Canostic. So Connig had joined his local Masonic
lodge and risen as soon as he could, right, because
he's big marn for this stuff, and he had meat
pretty very quickly, as quickly as possible, rises to the
highest rank within his lodge. And then he's like, oh, really,
is that all there isn yeah, I think it's a

(08:21):
conneit he is? He is cone, Yeah, And Connig is like,
was that all there is? Because this is just like
pronounce it but I really don't. Oh yeah, I mean
that was part of part of my thinking on the
matter too, But I think we should go with that bit. No,
Conig is gonna be less problematic. So his first name

(08:49):
huh yeah, we'll call Adolph. Yeah, that's a problem. There's
no bad history with adults, so it's still such a
common it. Really, it really is. This is all Stay good, Sophie.
There's not a lot that's funny about Hitler, but it
is kind of funny that he just torpedoed the German

(09:11):
equivalent to like Bill just nuked it. Good stuff. Good stuff.
Every now and then when you're reading about, like particularly
like German Jewish communities pre Holocaust, you'll run into like
a German Jewish Adolph and be like, oh man, what

(09:33):
an unfortunate name for you to have? In like nineteen
thirty one. Yeah, so yeah, as a little boy, Kennig
is all into these secret societies and he joins his
local Masonic lodge. He gets as high as he can,
and then he's like, is this really just like a
discount club for rich people? This is basically Costco with costumes. Yeah.

(09:55):
So Adam gets very disappointed and he's hanging out in
the lodge one day kind of bumming. Adam gets disappointed
or so not Adam, m Adolph. It's disappointment Adolph, a
little Adolf, and he's hanging around this lodge one day
kind of bumming about the fact that the Masons are silly.
And then one of these dudes, because by this point

(10:15):
Adam Bishopped has sent agents of the Illuminati out as
recruiters to other lodges, and one of these people walks
up to Connig and is like, you seem like you're
kind of bored with the Masons, and Cannig is like, yeah,
it's it's a little silly. And this guy's like, you know,
there's a real secret society that's hidden in the Masons
that only a small number of people get to join,

(10:38):
and so yeah, he makes his pitch, um and uh yeah,
Connig is like, that's exactly my shit. And he goes
to a bunch of his friends who are in the
Masons and he tells them this guy really he says
there's a secret society inside the Masons called the Illuminati,
and I should join and his friends are like, I
don't know, dude, it's probably bullshit, and boldly does not
listen to his friends. Um why Shop sends him a

(11:01):
letter later that year where he thanks Kennig for his interest,
and he's like, you must be a super smart guy
to have figured out that the Masons there's nothing there, right,
You're so smart. We think you're ready for our little organization.
So this is like the secret truth. What's really funny, suckers, Yeah, exactly,

(11:25):
we go to the group of suckers to get suckers.
What's gonna be really funny is when you learn why
we know all this so Cannig ends up promising or
Adam ends up getting Canig to join the Illuminati, in
part because he promises to fund Kenig's experiments in alchemy,
because he wants the guy to act as a recruiter.
Cannig is very charismatic, he's very connected. He's a diplomat,

(11:46):
so he's good at talking to people who's really respected.
And this proves to be probably the best administrative decision
that Adam's going to make, because in a very short
order Cannig is brought in more than five hundred new members. Wow.
Oh yeah, he's very good at this. At the same time,
Wishop succeeded in pushing changes to the Masonic by laws
that allowed him to establish additional Illuminatus lodges in the

(12:08):
larger organization. In time, the Illuminati grew to around twenty
five hundred men, although there's debate about whether there were
ever more than like six or seven hundred active at
a time, which seems reasonable. Well that it makes sense. Yeah,
pretty good size for a secret society in this period
of time. So the problem is that Connig rises through

(12:29):
the ranks as he had with the Masons, basically immediately
and he is not a dumb guy. He isn't at
least intelligent enough to realize something's up. And I'm going
to quote from the book The Illuminati by the Charles
River Press. The recruits began to raise their eyebrows, badgering
Connig with questions about exactly who it was that they
were serving. Up until this point, no one seemed to

(12:49):
have an inkling as to who the other members of
the Supreme Superiors were, apart from Bishop, and when Connig
failed to produce these names, many began to grow wary.
Connig approached why Shop on a number of occasions, and
he grew even more discouraged when Wishop dodged his questions
in an effort to distract him. Cannig was tasked with
composing pamphlets about recruiting guidelines and constant updates featuring the
most minor of changes. By the next year, Cannig's patients

(13:12):
had worn thin. It was only when Cannig threatened to
walk that Wishop finally came clean. To Kennig's horror, Wi
Shop admitted that the Supreme Superiors, the ancient texts behind
the topmost level of the Illuminati pyramid were entirely made up. So, yeah,
Cannig learns there's absolutely nothing here now. At this point,
Cannig's balls deep in the Enlightenment. He is very obsessed

(13:34):
with these ideas of truth and openness that are kind
of revolutionary in a Europe that was still largely run
by Catholicism. He's offended by the fact that Wei Shops
had lied and basically recreated this kind of system of
secrecy and lies, just in a different form. Adam realizes
that Cannig is going to be a problem because he's

(13:55):
got these kind of principles, and so he begs him
not to tell anybody. He instead tells Canig that I've
been waiting all this time. All this time, I've been
building the Illuminati for a worthy collaborator on the great
work of creating this organization, and quote, I have found
none other than you who penetrates into the spirit of
this system as deeply as I do. She said, yes,

(14:17):
meaning he's the only one that can smell the bullshit. Yeah,
he's You're the only one who's realized I'm lying to everybody.
So to keep Connig from leaving, he offers to let
him write the curriculum for the Inner mysteries of the Illuminati.
I mean that is the right call at this point. Yeah,
that's that's smart move. It's kind of like if l
Ron Hubbard had taken an apprentice to help him write

(14:38):
about like Zenu or whatever. Connig takes the deal, but
he's not thrilled with it. He is devastated when he
realizes the Illuminati is younger than him. But he's recruited
all these guys. So a big part of why he
doesn't leave is like he doesn't want to tell all
of his friends that he got conned and that they
all got conned too. Yeah, so he he is like
he's like into deep. It's the sunk cost fallacy he

(14:59):
now has. It's like he has like he has like
make it real now, Yeah, and he does. He writes
a whole curriculum filled with the kind of elaborate magical
rituals and ceremonies that were all the rage in Central Europe.
Now this was the right thing to do for the Illuminati.
But this really pisses off Adam Wi Shopped because Wi
Shopped hates all that stuff and is only doing it
to take money from rich people. The two fought constantly

(15:21):
and after four years, Connig resigned. Sources dissent on exactly
why this happens, but there are claims he mess left
in the middle of a loud fight shouting that Adam
was a megalomaniac with delusions of grant Here so it
ends the way all radical political organizations end. Connig would
later write his version of events out in a pamphlet

(15:44):
basically a Zane, which remains her best source of It
is funny how all of this has never changed, so
good stuffin Yeah. So as an aside, I should note

(16:05):
here because we've used Massimo Introviing as a source for
a couple of these quotes here, one of the problems
when you go to research the Illuminati is that it
is a bitch to Google. I have used also a
couple of different chat systems or a search systems, including
an aipowered one. But like one of the problems with
researching this is that a lot of the people who

(16:27):
legitimately are experts on the Illuminati are also cranks themselves.
So that brings me back to Massimo Introviing, because I
have quoted him a few times in the business is interesting.
We got to talk about him just a second, now
I have cross checked his rite up with other sources.
His right up on the Illuminati is extensive and accurate.
It's geared towards dispelling conspiracy theories, and it does this well. However,

(16:51):
Massimo is, as I stated, a sociologist of religion. He's
also an intellectual property attorney, which is interesting given the
connection between that and secret societies. He is very knowledgeable
about the history of secret societies. He is also the
founder of the Center for Studies on New Religions, which
mostly exists to defend cults from governments trying to stop
them from hurting people. Massimo has spent much of his

(17:14):
career defending the Church of Scientology in court, and he
has described as a cult apologist by his critics, although
I believe he's a Roman Catholic. WHOA, that's interesting. Yeah,
he's an interesting guy. You run into a lot of
dudes like he's one of the less sketchy people who
writes about the Illuminati, because at least he's doing it
from a historic basis. But he's also a professional cult apologist.

(17:37):
It's very straight. Yeah, it will working for the largest
established cult. Yeah, in the world. It's awesome. It's just
it's fun. You keep running into shit like that as
you like go through books and articles and are like,
who is this guy who seems to know a lot
about these Adam vyshopped? Oh, he's a craik too. It's
certainly interesting because like stuff like scientology does have a

(17:59):
direct age back to this Bavarian illuminati. It sure does, yes,
how it especially through like the Golden Dawn and Alistair Crowley,
which I assue will get to at some point, we
sure will, Garrison. But speaking of Alistair Crowley, you know
what Crowley would do if he were here right now
by one of these products and services make money by

(18:20):
selling Oh yeah, I mean our our podcast is supported
by gold, and if you move all of your investments
to gold, it will let you weather a financial crash
so that your investments can live to see the next dawn.
Dawn we go, there, we go, Okay, we're back. Good stuff.

(18:53):
The greatest form of flattery is the sigh of recognition. Yeah.
I find the greatest form of flattery to be people
giving me gold. Um, I would like to say that
once I get the po box set up, send gold
males gold. I'm gonna I'm gonna argue with you both,
because I think the greatest form of flattery is becoming
a cult apologist Roman Catholic who builds an entire website

(19:16):
to defend the fallen Gong from the Chase government. Oh yeah, Garrison,
that's where he's right up on. The Illuminati is hosted. No,
this fullen Gong is such like boring as I know,
I know, I know, disappointing the Bavarian Illuminati. So all right,

(19:39):
So Knig leaves and despite his absence, by this point,
he's helped get the Illuminati to such a side that
size that it's become quite large and influential. Um and
relief because they no longer have to pronounce his name. Yeah,
nobody has to deal with the problem of like trying
to spell it's yeah, oh boy, what's called by his
first name. So by this point, as the Illuminati has

(20:04):
actually grown somewhat influential, including a number of like moderately
prominent thinkers in some political people in Central Europe, Adam's
own ideology has grown ever more radical. In letters to
his followers, he expressed political attitudes that were adjacent to anarchism. Quote,
when man lives under government, he has fallen, his worth

(20:25):
is gone and his nature tarnished. So he has gotten
pretty radical by this point, and Massimo, our cult apologist
for a notes in his write up. One element that
distinguished the Bavarian Illuminati from other German Masonic systems continued
to be its politics. Again, up to the degree of
Scottish Knight, the rituals preached submission to the authorities, but

(20:45):
in the more secretive degree of priest there were allusions
to the advantages of replacing monarchy with republic, such as
if the king is not the best of the citizens,
let the best be king. So it's a little problematic.
There's like elements of we should tear down the system,
and also we should build a system whereby most people
don't know that we want to tear down the system
because we can't trust them with that knowledge. And yeah,

(21:09):
this is moving right along. But as with nig there
are a few people who grow disillusioned with Adam's leadership,
and one of them is a former member who starts
popping up in bars in public places in Ingolstot, getting
drunk and telling stories of the Illuminatis Initiation rituals. Now,
these are based off the Masonic ritual. You're sitting in

(21:30):
this like blind room alone for a while, blindfolded, and
then at some point the blindfold is taken off and
you're kind of like wandering around this space that's been
set up to be kind of mind altering. His story
includes like an empty red throne with a bunch of
ceremonial robes, a skeleton lying on a table with a
crown and a sword at his feet, and then at

(21:51):
a certain point the initiative is taken to his feet
and asked questions and he's hit in the face whenever
he answers them wrong. So you've got that aspect of
it too, And there's you know, that's probably broadly accurate
to what the initiation rituals were, but more lurid stories
than that start to spread, both from former members and
from people who were just lying in that way that

(22:12):
people do, and this starts to provide fuel for a
movement directly opposed to the Illuminati. And now we're going
to talk about the Rosa Crucians. Now we've mentioned them before,
and I think I kind of derivatively referred to them
as a fake secret society. Did I did get kind
of upset in in your Plevatsky episodes when they are

(22:32):
a fake secret society, but not that way. Yes, So,
the Rosa Crucians are an intellectual movement that's bubbled up
in the early sixteen hundreds, and like the Illuminati, it
began with a con a bunch of anonymous pamphlets that
claim to be the writings of a man who definitely
did not exist, and we're published again zine like claiming
that a secret group called the Rosa Crucians were working

(22:54):
to reform Europe's political order and use science to advance
my kind. Now again, the person that it was supposed
to have written these never existed. But an actual movement
in philosophy and theological fault thought evolves as a result
of this and kind of in its wake because of
how well it spreads. And so there are different secret
societies that are like the Order of the Rosa Cross

(23:16):
that call themselves Rosicrucians. They're not necessarily connected in most
cases by anything other than ideology, and they're not there's
not like a central one that is the original one
that we can specifically name, but there are different Rosicrucian
societies up until the present day, where I just read
an article about how the Rosicrucians, now that they don't
need to be secret, are recruiting primarily on Facebook. Um yeah,

(23:39):
I like that makes sense. Yeah. And in terms of
like viewing like like in terms of like thinking about
their organic spread, they chapters and like different spin like
splinter groups start this same way, like different food nut
bombs chapters start around the country. Like it's like that
that is this style of growth when it's like this
decentralized zine format that are that are of pamphlets being

(24:00):
passed off between you know, weirdos who are like reading
in the late sixteen hundreds. Well, in like food not bombs.
The primary motivation informing chapters is less a desire to
be a part of a specific organization and more adherence
to a set of values and beliefs. Like it is
and there's a there's a um, so what are their

(24:22):
beliefs there a Crucians, Um, they're broadly they're they're not
a secular organization, but they are broadly like pro science
and pro kind of natural like using kind of natural
science to gain more knowledge about the world. But there
are there are also there are elements of religious mysticism,
to it as well, So they are kind of like

(24:43):
a Christian religious mystic tradition that is also pro science.
Would be the broadest way of describing it. I think, um,
yeah again, most of like if you if you read
like historians who are experts on this, they'll say that, like, well,
there were there are Rosicrucian chapters, Rosicrucian societies more than anything.

(25:04):
The accurate way to view it is as an intellectual
tradition that takes off across Europe, and the Rosicrucians are
very influential, not just in their own societies, but within Masonry.
A lot of Masons are Rosicrucians. And one of these
Rosicrucian Masons who's in Bavaria is a guy named Johann
von Volner who starts to organize a campaign against the

(25:25):
Illuminati based on some of these rumors that are spreading
in bars. He accuses y shopped not inaccurately, of promoting atheism.
In seventeen eighty three, four Illuminati members, all professors, are
arrested and interrogated. They broke basically immediately testifying that the
organization existed to disavow Christianity Furthermore, they said, the Illuminati

(25:46):
and this is the thing that really pisses off everyone
supports the right to commit suicide. Interesting. Yeah, that is
a huge part of the campaign against them, that they
are pro people having the right to commit suicide and
also the pro abortion. Like this, this is this is
very I mean, this is not uncontroversial today. Yeah, so

(26:07):
you can see why a bunch of dudes talking this
kind of shit in the late seventeen hundreds are going
to piss off the powers that be. And one of
those these these university elites are talking about having bodily
autonomy and voting and and and and not liking any
kind of deity. They're they're they're closing themselves off from
the great blah blah blah blah blah. Yeah. Yea, yeah, Yeah,

(26:29):
it's very because it's the it's complicated because they're all
a bunch of like they've created this like very weird
like series of lies to hide it. But like the
core of illuminid ideology is people should be autonomous over
their own bodies and maybe voting is better than kings. Yeah. Um,
which up until about seven years ago, was not a
particularly controversial thing to preach in the West. Yeah. So

(26:54):
word gets out about all of these these scandalous deeds
to the King of Prussia, who orders the Berlin Lodge
seized by police. In this in the Berlin Lodge are
files and files of y Shop's political and social theories,
all of which are deeply heretical. So this pisses off
everybody even more, and an order is issued to the
Freemasons by the King to cut all ties with the Illuminati.

(27:18):
The Mason swiftly disavowed the Illuminati, and Adam vyshopped, you know,
finds himself kind of cut out and left in the cold, right,
But as Cred goes through the roof, and then oh my,
imagine all of the discourse going on at the time. Oh,
it would be fascinating stuff. If all these people had
had Twitter, it's so interesting. Go to Twitter threads and

(27:41):
just like Randdom, people complaining about what's going on. Yeah,
I hear they let you, I hear, I hear they
believe in the right to kill yourself. It would have
been quite a time. So by seventeen eighty five, the
Illuminati has been banned in Bavaria and all the cross
Prussia bishopped attempted to carry on, and this time he's
kind of truly underground because it is now in a

(28:02):
legal secret society, and for a while they're able to
keep up contact between the different parts of the Illuminati.
They've got like writers traveling between these hidden lodges, bringing
like correspondence and books between them and stuff. And one
of these guys who's also one of Oishop's closest advisors,
is a man named Jacob Lands, and he is traveling
from one cell in Bavaria to another Illuminati cell one

(28:25):
day with like a big bag full of books and
paperwork when he gets struck by lightning. Okay, so it's cool.
There's a bunch of detail that I've given in this story,
like smoke about like specific conversations people had. We know

(28:46):
that because this guy gets struck by lightning and his
corps is found by the cops, and being German police,
they take it all into evidence and it's preserved to
this day. That's why all this is known, right, Like
all of these papers were taken into evidence, and like
people who do care about the actual history can go
read them like it's still available. This is like this

(29:07):
is like this is like getting arrested when you're like
scrolling on signal and now, yeah, a big problems and
you got smited, yes, and yes, it's like you were
clearly killed by God. They find your body with your

(29:28):
phone open and they're like sweet, it's like some discworld
shit and discworld. No one's an atheist because the gods
go around and fucking murder you. Um, I'm going to
read a quote from the book Illuminati Again. Most damning
of the indictments were the set of instructions drawn up
by Why Shopped and Extress and addressed to the ostensibly

(29:49):
active Illuminati members in Silesia. The members in Silesia were
ordered to spy on the officials, engage the authorities knowledge
and opinions of the order. They were also asked to
provide input on who it was they believed had rated
out to the authorities. So like, literally it is he's
open with his signal for his like crime loop being like, hey, guys,
spy on the government. Is this has gotten considerably more

(30:10):
cool like the past development. Yeah, so obviously the police
don't like this and neither does the government. So there
are more raids on more Illuminati safe houses because now
they know where all of them are Um, they find
more documents in the homes. They're a problem with this
style of organization. Let's just be honest. Yeah, yeah it is.

(30:31):
And another problem is that again why shopped has continued
putting out propaganda lying about the real nature of the Illuminati.
So when they raid this dead guy's house they find
all of these these like pamphlets about how the Illuminatis
secret leadership has total mental control over its members and
like they can't they can be commanded to do anything
and all. This is this is why you never ship

(30:52):
post on Twitter, because it's going to be in court
against you. They were ship posting. It gets the middle
lot of trouble. There are also other documents found order
arguing in favor of the right to abortion, the right
of suicide, and in favor of atheism, all of which
is dope. And now I'm going to read another quote
from that book. That's very funny. You're gonna like this

(31:14):
garrison most eye catching of all with a blue prints
fends scrupulous machinery and devices. Each diagram was given its
own description. For example, there was one for printing knockoff
official seals. Another showed a safe of sorts equipped with
multiple locks, which would be used to stash classified documents.
The last showed a device that produced false receipts which
could be used for underground abortions, and one of the

(31:34):
folders there was even evidence found of why Shop procuring
an abortion for his sister in law, which is like,
this is exactly yeah. Yeah, Now they're not just advocating abortion,
they're literally helping create the infrastructure to allow Yeah, it
kind of seems like what happens because again five shops
motivation is like I want to trade and move and

(31:55):
like push illegal books on scholars and once they get
actually banned as an organization, he's like, well, I guess
let's create an underground abortion railroad. Yeah, which is we're doing.
What we're doing is already a crime. Now we might
as well just do other crimes. Yeah. Unfortunately the Lightning guy.
But you know, it was a good effort. It was

(32:15):
a noble attempt. So the media at the time goes
into overdrive at this point, painting the Illuminati as a
conspiracy to overthrow all of the governments of the world. Now,
this is far yet they hadn't they did want to, Okay,
that is fair to say they weren't pro overthrowing the
governments of the world. They just didn't really and probably

(32:38):
never would have had the ability to actually do this.
And of course it's also worth noting most Illuminati members
knew very little, if anything, of this. Yeah. In seventeen
eighty seven, the same year the United States got its constitution,
the Elector of Bavaria prescribed beheading for anyone found associated
with the Illuminati. They are. It's interesting because they don't

(32:59):
kill anyone over this. They arrest a bunch of people.
There are a number of folks, including y Shopped, are
forced out of Bavaria. They have to like leave. But
the folks who are like charged and like get in
trouble and stay in Bavaria. They're allowed to keep living
their lives. But they have a bunch of prescriptions placed
against them. One of them is that they can never

(33:19):
communicate with anyone else who was in the Illuminati, even
if they're like at a bar having a beer, Like,
they can be punished for so much as communicating with
anyone who had ever been in the Illuminati. I mean
that still happens. I've had friends be like you can't
talk to any other earth first or including your boyfriend
ever again. Yep, it's another another tragic piece of continuity

(33:40):
in radical history. So Adam flees the country. He winds
up kind of holing up in a nearby city called Regensburg,
where the local government offers him a yearly salary if
he promises not to make any more secret societies. They
put them on that eater, Like Adam, like, we'll give

(34:01):
you money. Stop doing this a huge problem for everybody
that's wild. It's like it's like so funny. It's like
it's like a it's like a government pay you not
to not to like write anywhere anarchist text. Don't don't
make any znes. We'll give you a salary if you
stopped making znes. That's so funny. Um, as far as

(34:27):
we as far as we know, he takes it. Now,
there are conspiracies that he basically goes underground and either
sins agents or travels to the US and starts spreading
spreading Illuminati values there. Um. But yeah, as far as
we know he obeyed the edict. We we have a
pretty good idea of what he spent his life doing.

(34:48):
Just because he writes a shitload more books. Um, he
writes and these are all like, basically, he spins the
rest of his life writing books and pamphlets defending the
Illuminati against allegations against He's basically continually yeah, he's basically
having like the eighteenth century equivalent of a flame war
for the rest of his life, which is like thirty
five more years, forty five more years. He kind of

(35:14):
never gets over this, and he's always angry that people
have unfairly judged the Illuminati. But he dies around eighteen thirty.
Doctor Tony Page, who translated one of Adam's defenses of himself,
summarized the man's life this way. Wischat's plan was to
educate Illuminati followers in the highest levels of humanity and
the morality, based on his teachings on the supremacy of reason,

(35:37):
allied with the spirit of the golden rule of not
doing to others what one would not wish done to
one's self, so that if the Illuminati alumnis subsequently attained
positions of significance and power, they could exert a benevolent
and uplifting influence upon society at large. His project was
utopian and naively optimistic, and he himself was certainly not
without flaws of character, but neither he nor his plan

(35:57):
was evil or violent in and of themselves. It is
one of the deplorable and tragic ironies of history that
a man who tried to inculcate virtue, philanthropy, social justice,
and morality has become one of the great hate figures
of twenty first century conspiracy thinking. And that is that
is kind of sad um, Yeah, that that is not

(36:17):
the legacy that you would want, as like a guy
whose goal was to kind of spread enlightenment and knowledge
in a more open society that like, you become sort
of the central figure of obsession for the people who
work to destroy that society. What's pieces of it get built?
That is, I can't really think of another story that's
bleak in exactly that specific way. The whole the whole

(36:42):
lineage of this illuminati thing has such an interesting like
backfire effect. Yeah, it makes me like contemplate what what
types of tactics are worth are worth using when in
this in this type of like long term, long term
strategy of like passing down knowledge. Yeah, And I think

(37:04):
an argument could be made that, like, well, probably part
of why this backfire so much is that as much
as he was committed to these Enlightenment virtues of openness,
and like reason, he did it by lying and pretending
to be teaching people magic. Like so maybe the fact
that maybe that's part of why things went so bad,

(37:26):
it's probably not a non factor. Yeah, I mean, and
it's like there's a reason that, say, at least leftism,
at least anarchism does a similar trajector does this trajectory
where you start off with like baccoon and is really
into secret societies, and then eventually anarchists start moving away
from sort of conspiratorial work and towards this like open
organizing still of crime. Right, like in the nineteen twenties,

(37:50):
I think in Germany the main people who were providing
abortions were syndicalists. And syndicalism is literally just a method
by which to do crime at scale, but it's like
open instead of closed, and it uses different types of
things in order to provide safety. And it's interesting because
I think, you know, he's a Bishops a little early

(38:13):
to be calling there are very few people in this
period calling themselves anarchists. No, No, I don't think anyone
is at this point. Yeah, But I mean, like just
in terms of realism, but people did it is interesting
people did, like elites in Europe who were angry and
opposed to the Illuminati did accuse him of being an anarchist. Oh. Interesting,
not unlike the pope, because again it's not that's not
a term with much political meaning at that point, but

(38:34):
it just means terrorist at the exact exactly. And I
think he if he'd been a century lead, he might
have been. I don't think he would have been a syndicalist.
He was kind of no, very fundamentally an elitist, right, Yeah,
that's why the Illuminati is what it is. He would
have been Blancy. Oh, I don't know much about them.
Is the French guy who kind of predates Lenin in

(38:57):
some ways. It's like it's kind of like a vanguardist. Yeah,
very vanguardists, right, like you have to have this party
and they have to hold power in certain ways to themselves.
And yeah, part of the story here is that we
are still dealing with the side effects of how problematic
that can be because all a lot of this is
going to echo on through the ages. But you know

(39:17):
what will echo on through the ages, most the dulcet
tone gold these messages these to get you to buy
the gold. The products and services that support this podcast
are like those pillars in the desert that are built
to warn future people away from nuclear waste sites, but

(39:38):
instead they're there to tell future people where value is
and what promo codes they can use to get access
to truly quality products and services. So have a gaze
at that. Ah, we're back. So the Illuminati they fall

(40:02):
apart in kind of the mid to late seventeen eighties,
and not all that long after the Illuminati gets banned
and threatened with beheadings if they try to reform in
seventeen huh, yeah, that's leg Yeah, right right around the
time they start to be purged, the French Revolution starts,
and not that long after, you know, it all comes

(40:23):
to an end in seventeen ninety nine. That's when the
French Revolution kind of comes to its end, right after
about a decade of pretty gnarly shit, would it would
be fair to say, And the nature of the French Revolution,
the fact that it comes so suddenly, the fact that
it is so bloody, that it is such it so
radically up ends the power balance in Europe. It's one

(40:46):
of these things that like particularly elites in Europe, cannot
believe could happen organically. Now, obviously, if you actually look
at the history of the French Revolution, it makes total
sense everything economically that's happening, the measures of the ferment
takes kind of as resistance to it spreads, like the
different kinds of austerity that people are asked to endure.
It makes total sense that there's a revolution, and it

(41:08):
makes total sense anytime there's a revolution, there's a pretty
good chance it's going to turn into a killing spree.
But people in Europe are like not normal people, like elites,
particularly rich people in like England, are like something, this
can't have happened organically, Like there must have been some
sort of conspiracy behind this, And so they start looking

(41:30):
at like, well, what are these French revolutionaries, Like what
are these people? Especially if the early stages, like what
are the three things they're all shouting for? Liberty, egality,
and fraternity? Right, well, those are the same things the
Illuminati advocated. Yeah, we've we've just purged this thing in
Central Europe that came out of the Masons that are
speaking for this, and then there's a revolution just a

(41:52):
few years later. Once these guys go underground in France.
That can't be just a coincidence, right, Yeah, so I'm wondered.
I now understand the connection. Thank you Robert for doing
this podcast. Explain the French The Bavarian Illuminati caused the
French Revolution. Oh yes, of a problematic number of people

(42:14):
are going to become convinced of that, Margaret. And one
of those guys was an abbot. Again all these Catholic
motherfuckers is always Yeah, it's an abbot named Augustine Berwell.
And another guy who gets convinced is John Robinson, and
Robinson writes attract with a banger title Proofs of a
conspiracy against all the religions and governments of Europe, carried

(42:36):
on in the secret meetings of Freemasons, Illuminati, and Reading societies.
Serious banger of a title. Now, I love Howers used
to be. I want to kind of go into some
detail about how wrong he is, especially when he connects
like the Masons and Reading societies to the overthrow of

(42:56):
the French government. Because the Freemasons are, as we talked about,
influential and spreading Enlightenment ideas, particularly in France. But one
of the things that's happening in France with the Masons
is that, like pretty much alone in the rest of Europe,
in France the Masons admit women. And this is because
France is just a lot more advanced one and this

(43:18):
is before the French Revolution, right, they start taking in
female members and they are female Masonic lodges, which doesn't
really happen anywhere else. This is going to be an
extended digression, but I think it's worthwhile because what happens
here is fascinating. I'm going to quote again from Janet
Burke's paper in the Journal of the History of European Ideas.
Quote as they ascended to ever higher degrees, always after

(43:40):
having mastered and lived the ideas and feelings of the
preceding degree. The women were exposed to the Enlightenment concepts
of liberty, equality, and even a budding, uniquely eighteenth century
form of feminism. They were taught to understand their rights
as women and demand them from the world dominated by men.
Yet the force of fraternity remained strong. In each degree.
Bonds with both their Masonic sisters and their sisters outside

(44:01):
the lodges were solidified through the ritual process. The powerful
rituals the emotional bonds of sisterhood, the assertiveness of their
incipient feminism, and the novel feelings of friendship as a
union of virtuous souls made their impact on these women
and altered the way they faced their day to day tasks.
From the wives of judicial nobility heavily populating some of
the provincial lodges of adoption to the glittering court lodges

(44:22):
in Paris, powerful women worked both alone and with their
husbands to alter environments outside the lodge, just as they
had done behind the closed doors of their temples. An
intense spirit of independence, strong dedication to charity, an interest
in new ideas, and profound loyalty to friends characterized many
of these women. So contrad to this conspiracy theory, the
Freemasons in France are part of the ruling class. Now,

(44:45):
there's a contribute, a contribution that is made to the
revolution in that anytime you have a revolution, it often
is preceded by an authoritarian regime, slightly opening up aspects
of society and an attempt to release steam. This is
a thing that has happened in a number of cases.
There's a piece of that going on here. But it's
interesting to discuss kind of how integrated to the power

(45:07):
structure female Masons often were. Princess Marie de l'embald, superintendent
of the household of Queen Marie Antoinette, was one such
a lady Mason. She was outspoken, a reformer who got
in constant trouble for her refusal to throw the kind
of giant, expensive, hideously wasteful parties that the French royal
family was known for. This is a problem when you're
the superintendent of the queen's household. So eventually she gets

(45:29):
fired because she's like protesting against the wastefulness of this
kind of lifestyle that the court has, and she's pushed
out of court until the revolution breaks out in seventeen
eighty nine. Now, when that happens, all of the queen's
like friends abandon her right, all of these kind of
courtly friends who'd been attending the parties. Marie de l'ambald,
she's very much invested in these Masonic attitudes of fraternity,

(45:53):
which for female Masons, a big part of what the
female like Masonic lodges are pushing is not just solidy
with other female Masons, but cross feminine solidarity in a
society that's male dominated. So even though she'd gotten fired
by the queen for her beliefs, the Lambald comes back
after the revolution breaks out to stand by her because

(46:14):
of this kind of attitude of radical solidarity that she
feels like she has to show for the Queen. Interesting
she stays with her until the end, and in fact,
when they are all captured by revolutionaries, Marita Lambald is beheaded.
Her corps is mutilated and it is left directly in
front of the Queen's cell, so she has to look
at it while her head is paraded around Paris. Now

(46:38):
that's a bummer of a story, but I bring it
up because it is also shows another really weird continuity
to modern day conspiracy theorists starting in the seventeen nineties
claimed the Masons in the Illuminati had started the revolution.
In reality, a good number of the people massacred in
the terror were Masons. And this is kind of the
start of a long pattern in conspiracy culture of blaming

(47:00):
victims for their complicity and some sort of convoluted scheme
that they were actually the victims of rather than the
perfect ms. That goes back pretty far too well, that's
what's always so funny about all this is like you're like, oh,
the connection of QAnon and stuff, which I'm excited to
hear more about later. But it's like, the cranks are
not the conspiracists. They're the conspiracy theorists. The people who

(47:23):
spent around the conspiracy is the people conspiring about the conspiracy. Yeah,
the conspiracy. The conspiracy is Marie de Lombald being having
like coming to the conclusion that it is important to
show radical solidarity with other women and then dying for it. Likes,
that's the conspiracist in this case. Right. Anyway, none of

(47:47):
what actually happens in France matters because by this point
it has become a conspiracy theory, and in very short order,
Barrowell and Robinson's tracks traveled across the pond to a
little place you might have heard of called the United
States of America, where a Massachusetts ministers. Oh you're not
gonna like it anymore, is the story goes on, Margaret.

(48:09):
A Massachusetts minister named Jedediah Morse comes across them, and
he grows obsessed with the Illuminati, which he decides is
still out there and was clearly responsible for why things
in France went so bad, so he dedicates he starts
preaching and writing tracks about how the Illuminati is out
there trying to quote, root out, and abolish Christianity and

(48:29):
overturn all civil government. Now, Jedediah Morse is a textbook
author as well as a preacher, so he had a
lot of influence. And his ship spreads, and it spreads,
and it spreads. On May nineteenth, seventeen ninety eight, President
John Adams had proclaimed a day of solemn humiliation, fasting,
and prayer, but Morse did not give a lecture on

(48:52):
any of those topics. From a write up and slate
quote in that day's speech, Morse unspooled a bizarre conspiracy theory,
alleging that a shadowy cabal the villains called the Illuminati,
an offshoot of the Freemasons, were aiming to destroy everything
that Americans held dear. This group of philosophers, zealous, according
to Morse, had secretly extended its branches through a great
part of Europe and even into America. Their goal was

(49:14):
to abolish Christianity, private property in nearly every foundation of
good order around the world. According to Morse, they opposed marriage,
encouraged people to explore all kinds of sensual pleasures and
proposed a promiscuous intercourse among the sexes. Oh shit, this

(49:39):
is just this is just your average Yeah, he has
a normal Republican member of Congress. Yeah, so whereas like
a lot of people are like yeah, yeah, I know that,
but just but notwith pretending like it's bad. Yeah yeah,
but that's all fine. Yeah, that's all like normal stuff. Yeah,

(50:05):
I'm going to continue that quote. Morsk told his congregation
that the Illuminati hoped to infect the people of America
through a kind of cultural warfare. They were spreading their
doctrines by worming their way in among reading and debating societies.
The reviewers, journalists or editors of newspapers or other periodical publications.
The booksellers and postmasters. Oh my god, it's just the

(50:31):
culture wars coming for the libraries. The culture war has
never stopped. I bet those people protecting drag shows are
the Illuminati. Now. One of the things that Morse also
points out is that there are even some influential members
of the Founding Fathers who were illuminatus. You want to

(50:53):
guess who he names? Franklin, No, Jefferson, No, Neither those
guys are basing Pain. That's exactly right. Thomas Paine famed Illuminatus,
which is not me, is nothing but a compliment to
Thomas Pain. Yeah, yeah, totally the only truly based Founding

(51:14):
father Franklin kept wanting to be based and they kept
being like, or I could buy people, and his friends
were like, no, you were against that. Yeah he gotta well,
I don't know. Yeah, he became an abolitionist. Um okay, yeah,
he just was not. Like. One of the things that
one of the reasons Pain gets picked is that Pain
is very, especially by the end of his life, very

(51:35):
anti christian He write, like, writes a book of critiques
against Christianity. Um yeah, in a way that's like, which
is like, you know, sketching at the time. This is
the eighteen hundreds. Yeah, um, sometimes I'm not afraid like
writing a fucking book against Christianity, and yeah, I'm willing
to take a stand against Christianity in the year eighteen

(51:55):
hundred and fucking dot Ye it's yeah, he he's a
bold man. And again Morris is a piece of shit,
but solid pick from member of the illuminati among the
Founding generation. Yeah. Yeah, the Bernie Sanders of the Yeah,
it was like, oh that guy, he's a little different frank. Yeah. Now,

(52:16):
other notable figures in America at the time who jumped
onto the Illuminati conspiracy bandwagon included the president of Yale
and the attitude like this guy's attitude. The Yale President's
attitude is that Americans have to come back to God
to defeat this satanic conspiracy. Where religion prevails, Illuminism cannot
make disciples, a French directory, cannot govern a nation, cannot

(52:39):
be made slaves, nor villains, nor atheists, nor beasts. He
reminded his readers that if this dangerous society succeeded in
its plans, the children of evangelicals would be forced to
read the work of deists or become kuncubines of a
society that treated chastity is a prejudice, adultery is a virtue,
and marriage is a farce. Yeah, it's just all the same. Yeah,

(53:05):
specifically that the religious freedom is to not let their
children read stuff. That is the religious freedom that they need.
I mean, it's interesting because it gets framed a lot
as like, look at how crazy the GOP has gone.
But the only thing religious freedom has ever meant in
the context of the United States of America is the
freedom to stop your children from learning things. This is

(53:26):
the only supportable conclusion by the actual evidence. That is
what people who talk about religious freedom primarily mean in
a political sense in this country. I want the freedom
to stop my kid from encountering ideas other than what
I believe. Yeah, totally just cool. Anyway, homeschooling is good.
So the mania over the Illuminati spread as far as

(53:49):
the former President of the United States, George Washington, who
stated that he was satisfied that the Illuminati had in
fact spread to the United States in an attempt to
destroy it. Abigail Adams recommended Robinson's book, which was basically
an unhinged conspiratorial screed to all of her friends. America's
founding fathers and mothers bought into the Illuminati conspiracy theories

(54:11):
so hard that some scholars argue had helped set a
tone for the new nation that has remained with it
ever since. In his infamous essay The Paranoid Style in
American Politics, which is probably the single most important piece
of reading anyone can read in order to understand the
American right wing in a meaningful way, Richard Hofstadter describes
how the anti Illuminati conspiracy hysteria of the seventeen nineties

(54:36):
merged with a broader anti Masonic movement in the eighteen
twenties and thirties. At first, this movement may seem to
be no more than an extension or repetition of the
anti Masonic theme sounded in the outcry against the Bavarian Illuminati.
But whereas the panic of the seventeen nineties was confined
mainly to New England and linked to an ultra conservative
point of view, the later anti Masonic movement affected many

(54:56):
parts of the Northern United States and was intimately linked
with popular democracy and rule egalitarianism. Although anti Masonry happened
to be anti Jacksonian, Jackson was a Mason, it manifested
the same animus against the closure of opportunity for the
common man and against aristocratic institutions that one's finds in
the Jacksonian crusade against the Bank of the United States.

(55:17):
The anti Masonic movement was a product not merely of
natural enthusiasm, but also of the vicissitudes of party politics.
It was joined and used by a great many men
who did not fully share its original anti Masonic feelings.
It attracted the support of several reputable statesmen who had
only mild sympathy with its fundamental bias, but who as politicians,
could not afford to ignore it. Now, what does that

(55:41):
sound like? I mean, it's it's just all of it.
The thing I was thinking of when you're reading that
is just how much of the current stuff we're dealing
with now will be viewed in this same way in
like two hundred years, Like all the stuff around like
like like drag shows and COVID and all, like all
this type of thing is like that's it's like, this

(56:02):
will be viewed in this same weird, like weird like
conspiratorial legs in the future as there's like you know,
group groups of Antifa defending these drug shows and there's
people in the government talking about this organized efforts to
blah blah blah blah blah. It's like it's it's it's all.
It's all the same style of conspiracism that just it's

(56:22):
it's it's it's it's always interesting to think that you're
like that you actually are like living through history and
no what what what what you're experiencing now will be
reminisced on the same way we reminisce on these weird
like these weird antium anti Mason movements and like the
early eighteen hundreds. Yeah, optimism about the continuation of society.

(56:44):
I think the future at some point, the future version
of a podcaster, which will probably like be a guy
sitting around a barrel fire in the ruins of Chicago,
will tell all of this story, but with like an
extra couple of chapters of good stuff. Margaret, how do

(57:08):
you what's the best way to start a barrel fire?
Is it lots of gasoline? I mean, that's the fastest
way to start. For the fastest way to start almost
two fire, is you take you take the mystery gas can,
because there's always a mystery gas can, Yeah, the one
that's been there for a few years past what you
want to try putting in your car. Yeah. And it's
also like you're not you don't remember. If it's diesel,

(57:30):
you don't remember, If it's a gas you don't remember.
If you added some oil to it. It might have
been the one that you did like one to five.
Maybe where you live floods a lot, and there might
have been like water might have gotten into it and
you're not sure. Yeah, the untrustworthy gas can. The untrustworthy
gas can is how you start a barrel fire. In
my experience, that is the best way to start a
barrel fire. That's why you got to rotate out your

(57:53):
your good and bad fucking fuel cans. Yeah, well label them. No, no, no,
that's never going to happen. I don't know. I'm like
eighty percent good at tasting the difference between diesel and
regular fuel. Um, see the people whom you know, the
there was that campaign you can't drink oil or yeah,

(58:16):
like so then all the yeah, well that was the
I mean kind of reasonably in some ways the right way.
People would go on YouTube and then drink motor oil,
like clean motor oil, not use motor oil, and be like, look,
it's it's kind of neutral. It's so funny. I think
that we should have just gone harder with that and
like basically tried to do like the gallon of milk challenge,

(58:40):
but with I don't know, like diesel fuel. Just see
what we can get them to do. Yeah, We're never
the libs need to accept that we are never going
to argue our way out of this. You cannot convince
people of anything like about the irrationality of any of
these movements, because they are based in irrationality. But we

(59:02):
could probably get them to drink diesel fuel if we
all work hard at it, and that would be really funny.
This is what I'm going to read into the transcript.
The bard who has this as a transcript to read
around the barrel fire, got it from court transcripts. Yeah,
thank you. After the entire state of Florida dies in

(59:25):
a diesel accident, a freak diesel drinking accident, the remnants
of Florida of the cool zone media, well, thank you
for being a part of passing off this arcane knowledge
to the to the future generation. You're all in a
secret society. Tell anyone who asked that this podcast is
just about you know, Hitler or whatever. That'll that'll get him, No,

(59:49):
tell him it's true crime. Tell him. Tell him some
broad got murdered and we're gonna like spend thirty hours
talking about it. Anyway. The broad who got murdered was
civil democracy. Yeah, Margaret got anything to plug? Yeah, I
have a podcast. I don't know if if you're listening,

(01:00:11):
if you like podcasts or not, but if you do,
maybe you like history podcasts, and if you do, I've
got a podcast for you. It's called Cool People Who
Did Cool Stuff. It's available on Cool Oh yeah, yes,
Schools on Media is still exists and has not been
sued into oblivion by the remnants of Florida until we
go down taking out Florida like gandal fighting the bowl
rog Yeah, just falling into a bit together. Okay. As

(01:00:35):
someone who lives in West Virginia, I have to be
a little bit careful when you blanketly make fun of
people of a state. But that said, look, man, I
grew up in Texas. If there's one thing that entitles
me to do, it's make fun of Florida. Yeah, okay,
fair enough. And then also, if you want to make
fun of a bunch of other people, you can read
my book Escape from Insul Island, which is about making

(01:00:57):
fun of insalls and then feeling sort of like trolls
remorse halfway through writing it and actually start talking about
what's wrong with the prison industrial complex. Um. And that
is available from Tangled Wilderness dot org. You can get
it wherever you get books. Probably I don't know, hell yeah,
hell yeah, Well be strange and a Tangled wilderness and
will continue to be normal. You're in not a tangled wilderness.

(01:01:21):
Do you want to ask Garrison if they have anything
they'd like to plug? Or is wow, just clear gar
Garrison is so secretive about what they do. Would they
would they want people to know? Would they want to
Why do you let them speak for themselves? I can't anyways,
I can't believe. I can't believe I'm facing this type

(01:01:43):
of discrimination. No, this is you're trying You're trying to
silence my uh my, my enlightened knowledge. But no, um,
if you want to hear about a collection of people
who the Georgia government, that is the state of the
State of Georgia alleges is a is a secret is
a secret coalition of of of organized people who are

(01:02:05):
who are who are fighting against the government. You can
listen to my recent series on the Defend the Alant
of Force movement and the different types of state repression
that they are facing using very similar kind of conspiratorial,
you know, group association type language to try to hurt
the people that are that are actually trying to stop

(01:02:27):
a force from being cut down. So that a batch
of four episodes just came out on it could happen here.
That is most of what I've been doing the past month.
Oh so go do that. Check out those episodes, which
should be out by the time this airs. Will certainly
be out by the time this airs. Um and and

(01:02:48):
go again. I really can't advise you enough. Go weld
galvanized steel without wearing a respirator. It will reveal to
you hidden truths from the sea masters of the world.
That's that's They're hidden in galvanized steel. It's like a
genie's bottle. You got to break it open. See, you
can fuck a genie, like that new Frank Miller movie,

(01:03:10):
which was pretty fucking dope in my opinion. Wait, what's
the movie where they fuck a genie? Oh, it's like
it's like three thousand years of Solitude or something like that,
A thousand I forget the exact title. Something of Solitude,
but it's like it's Tilda Swinton fucking an indus Alba genie.
It's pretty dope. All right, I think you should. You
should tell people that, not specifically, the Liberals don't want

(01:03:32):
Biden is coming for your right to to stout respirator.
Oh yeah, that too. Yeah, Joe Biden just said during
the State of the Union, the late part in it
that you didn't hear that he wants Americans to stop
Weldon galvanized steel without respirators. First they came, and now
they come for our A real alpha male m doesn't

(01:04:01):
word a respiratored. Oh god, it don't let that be
the last word of the podcast. It Cocked behind the
Bastards is a production of cool Zone Media. For more

(01:04:22):
from cool Zone Media, visit our website cool zonemedia dot com,
or check us out on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts,
or wherever you get your podcasts.