Part Two: Hitler's Sex Life: The Whole Sad Story

Robert is joined again by comedian Brandie Posey to continue discussing Hitler's sex life.

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:03):
We're back. Wait. I mean, I'm Robert Evans. This is
Behind the Bastard podcast. Bad People talk about Brandy Posey.
That's me. We are here. It's part two. Hitler Fox, Hitler,
Fox Boogaloo. Hitler's dick. Everybody's thinking about it, and everybody's
thinking about it. Hitler's stupid dick. Hitler. And I'm gonna guess,

(00:26):
you know, he doesn't seem like a guy who did
a lot of core strengthening exercises. And then I guess
a little little low energy. No, yeah, Hitler is like,
uh like a like a like a five pump kind
of guy. I know'd at you. I know what his
hair would do because I can imagine like a sweat
drenched fucking Hitler with just like that little thing flipping

(00:47):
down on the front of it. He's just constantly just yeah,
so mad, like every organ as um makes him mad
because it makes him happy. It just gets angrier and
angrier the more he comes. Yeah, exactly, Hitler doesn't make
me feel good. I don't understand Hitler. And I was
going a little Russian there, a little a little yeah.

(01:07):
I'm not great at accents. It's okay anyway, Uh, podcast
The Hitler. When we left off, we had just sort
of established Hitler's youth in his young adulthood, the way
his best friends talked about him and his sexual life,
although after they were no longer his best friends. Again,
I'll take everything here about Hitler with a little bit
of salt um. Yeah exactly. When then we know about

(01:29):
the guy for sure? Is that burked Gotten was his
happy place. It's basically a quiet mountain town where he had.
He eventually built a giant fortress up there, but it
was he had like a room on to the top
of the mountaine. We could stare pensively out of the
skyline and contemplate being Hitler. Uh, he just needed, imo.
I think he just needed like Elliott Smith would have
saved the world a lot of problems. Yeah, exactly, guys,

(01:52):
feel so seen. I feel so seen. He is also right,
like his saying, I understand becoming a Transylvania. The accidents
are going to be all over the place, oh boy. Now.

(02:13):
In autumn of nineteen six, Hitler took a trip to
Burked's Gotten in order to relax and plot the Nazi
Party's next series of electoral cups. He was staying at
a fancy hotel writer's retreat. Yeah, basically a writer's retreat.
He was going up to big Bear to like write,
get his get his tight five down. But what if
he also took a bunch of spinach with him that
he didn't end up eating. Almost certainly, that's every writer's

(02:36):
retreat I've ever gone on. I'm just like, I'm bringing
nothing but kale and kids eating. I just go to
taco belt. Hitler had that experience too. Oh, yeah for sure. Yeah. Now,
while he was staying in a fancy hotel, hil their
meddle lady named Maria writer Mimi to her friends. Now,
young Mimi was in a rough spot in life. Her
mom had died of cancer two weeks earlier. Her dad,

(02:58):
a member of the Social Democratic Party, had pulled her
out of her Catholic boarding school to help run the
family clothing store. Now, the store was located in the
bottom floor of the hotel where Hitler was staying, and
Hitler saw her as soon as he arrived. Uh, seemingly
at once, this thirty seven year old politician saw a
grieving sixteen year old girl and was like, I gotta
give me some of that. It's the only moment his

(03:21):
dad's ever been proud of him, Like there's one more. Okay, great,
of course, probably a couple like father, uncle, like son,
cousins uncle. Now, even at the time, sixteen was a
bit young for a middle aged man to date a yeah, yeah, yeah.
That became a pattern with Hitler. The older he grew,

(03:43):
the age of the girls he flirted with stay the same. Yep, yep. Yeah.
Here's the thing. Nothing you've said is is surprising to me.
You're just like, yeah, no, I that fills in that
part of the puzzles, in that part of the puzzles,
just like pick it up a little pieces. This guy
is not such a mystery. Yeah, I feel like I've

(04:03):
known a few of him. It's mostly it's one of
those like it's a puzzle of just like a piece
of ship, but with no borders, so the puzzle just
keeps expanding in every direction. Not only do I feel
like I know this guy, I feel like I've stood
in a police station with several friends and tried to
warn the police about this guy. Oh yeah, absolutely, it's yeah.
It's one of those guys that you're like, just get out,

(04:26):
just maybe I should just duck and roll. Yeah, you
just gotta you just gotta go on sixteen year old.
That was one of the most like I was, I was.
I've definitely told some gross jokes about women in my time,
especially when I was like seventeen, eighteen years old, Like
I grew up with the same toxic bullshit as everything else.
One of the big things in my change of mind
state around this was just the fact that like coming
to a realization throughout my twenties that like, well, every

(04:47):
woman I know has been scared for her life at
some point during a date. I'm just worried about like
am I tipping enough? Like is she gotta judge? Like
the stakes are very, very differently different. Yeah, oh I
get it. I'm sorry. Hitler is one of those guys
today who would have made a lot of women scared. Yes, yeah, yeah, exactly,
and then be like, oh, it's your problem, it's your problem.

(05:09):
It's like, no, man, I'm not sure what the accents
are going. Just think, have a little bit of empathy
a situation that might be different from yours. Yeah uh so.
Ian Kershaw notes quote Hitler preferred women much younger than himself,
girls he could dominate who would be obedient playthings but
not getting his way, and I guess it seems pretty accurate. Yeah. Yeah,
Hitler waited until he saw Mimi out of work, sitting

(05:30):
on a bench in a nearby park with her sister
playing with their dog, which, okay, it's a better move
than f at work. Until she's out in you know,
a social public situation or whatever. She's not alone, so
you're not like, you know, you with the work. Yeah,
if you're, if you're, if you're, if you're, if you're
gonna like game like question Hitler, so far sol of
the opening movies you could not not terrible and the

(05:50):
fact that she's a literal teenager. So he goes up
to this girl. What is this guy? A Republican? Uh,
potentially a senator from Louisiana. Basically, what's going on? It's
not like this happens today. So he's a pretty big
name in Germany and Mimi recognizes him immediately. Not a
lot of guys look like Hitler. Yeah that is one

(06:11):
of he's he's a Hitler. Yeah, it's recognizable. He's pretty
much like, that's a Hitler right there? Did he have
the mustache at this point? Oh? Yeah, we're about to
talk about that. So Mimi later talked to interviewers, and
I'm going to quote the book explaining Hitler's kind of
the way it put together her recollection of how Hitler
flirted with her during this period. Quote she describes the

(06:34):
affair in the language of a harlequin romance novel. Hitler
is the stiff, somewhat ruthless stranger who first appears with
a dog and a whip, but has later melted into
a schoolgirl fantasy lover by her charms. Quote from Mimi.
There's the famous Hitler, recently released from prison. She's told
he was wearing breeches and a light velure hat, she recalls,
and his hand was a writing whip. He had warm,
light gray stockings and a windbreaker that was held together

(06:55):
by a leather belt. Beside him walked a beautiful shepherd.
He sees her too in his Theatrically captivated, he asks
Mimi's sister, could you introduce me to this bliss Mimi
has brought over. He transferred his writing whip from his
right hand to his left, gave me his hand and
looked at me with a piercing gaze, and praised her dog.
The dog is really beautiful and well trained. You are
really good at that. They talked about dogs for an hour.

(07:17):
Hitler quote did not take his eyes off of Mimi.
Then he very formally asked her sister Annie whether she
would permit him to take Mimi for a walk. Sometime
at that she Mimi got up and ran away. So
this is the first meeting. Uh. Still, she was fascinated
in a starstruck way. He looks quite dashing with his
breeches and his writing whip. There is one note that
spoils the picture. His mustache, the funny flies she calls

(07:40):
the black hairy growths between beneath Hitler's nose. He was
still figuring out the mustache at this point. So she's she's,
I mean, she's a literal child, but isn't entirely against
it at first, but runs off when she's flirted with
which again this is yeah, yeah, yeah, I mean. And
it's also like at a certain point, having having been like, uh,
a young gal that you kind of have to endure

(08:02):
those things. You you you're polite until you see an
exit and then you're like, okay, time to go. I'm
not gonna out. Also, I'm not going to outrighte rebuke
you because you're in a position of power. Yeah, It's
it's weird because she she recalls this as like a
positive thing, but it's also like she's recalling this years
later and like when she realizes that she essentially hooked

(08:23):
up with the most famous man of the twentieth century,
So like some of this is going to be retroactively,
she's going to make it like the thing. I don't know.
I can't imagine being that position. So I'm not going
to judge Mimi writer, No, no, no, no, she's a child. Also,
she hasn't she's sixteen. Yeah, yeah, he's the thirty seven
year old approaching her. So Pitler invited Mimi and her
sister to a Nazi party meeting where he was giving

(08:46):
a speech. He wasn't allowed to give public speeches in
nine is a condition of his parole. So it's an
older man with a parole history. Like, who's on parole
hitting not a sixteen year old? What do you? What
is he? Uh? What is he? A line chef at
a rib place? That's exactly what makes this money fucking court.

(09:07):
He's got a tramsand oh god, oh I know these
guys I've bought coke from Hitler. Oh, man about Yeah,
that's totally Hitler is. Oh god. Remember I remember working
in a in a rib place when I was when
I was a teenager in high school like this, I
know this guy exactly. And there's this one chef that

(09:30):
didn't talk to me at all until on on Valentine's
Day he brought me a candy heart that had a
picture of a moose on it and it said you
amuse me, okay, and I remember just being like, thanks,
that's a move I And then he had like a child,
he had like a baby, like brought to one of
my shifts. I was like, cool, glad you introduced me

(09:51):
to your baby. I don't give a shit about this.
So how long have you all been married? He's probably dead.
I hope he is. Healthy society. That's what happens. The
Hitler light guy dies of a coke overdose in his
car and at age thirty four. Yeah exactly, I just remember. Man, No,
that's who Hitler was, for sure. That's fry in a

(10:17):
healthy society. All our Hitlers are fry cook's, and some
of our fry cooks become Anthony Bordains, but none of
our Anthony Bordains become Hitler's. No none, no, no, absolutely not.
That's that's a healthy society. Yeah. Anyway, uh so, yeah,
Hitler since that this teenager was attracted to his fame,
so he like really played that up. After this big event,

(10:39):
he put her and her sister at the head table
for dinner and sat them right next to him, so
they felt like they were at the center of this big,
important political meeting. Like, I mean, it was a big
important political the knots of a charge. But it's funny
like thinking about like from the perspective of the other
Nazis in the room, just like, oh, and Hitler has
two children with the boss is hitting on a teenager.
Cool this, We're on the right side of it. We're

(11:00):
the right one. We're the good guys. We're doing great. Yeah,
we got a fucking cuck pedophile boss running the party.
We're on the right side of history. I feel like
we're the good guys. We totally are. God Um, she
later recalled, uh and I have to remind you she's
talking about Hitler here. Quote. I was very embarrassed and blushed.

(11:23):
It was as if he had organized the meeting just
for me as if all that counted for him now
was to just conquer me. She was apparently feeling that.
During dinner, Hitler quote fed her pieces of cake like
a little child. He treated her like a child, and
then again like a grown woman. After dinner, he talked
about her dead mom and told her that she had
the same eyes as his dead mom. Hitler's game is

(11:44):
pretty weird. Wow, God, there's just so many dead moms
coming into how Hitler flirts, Oh, mom, show me a
picture of your dead mom is dead? Show me my,
I'll show you your tragically dead maza. Yeah exactly. Let's
put their pictures together and make them kiss. Does this

(12:06):
do anything for you? Just sixty nine are dead mom's faces?
Is that what you like? Little child? This is how fun? Yes? Yeah, yeah,
just whipping photos of somebody else's dead mother your mother's
photo and watched me cut it in half. Oh boy,
oh boy? Yeah. So uh. He followed that with or

(12:29):
He followed with what Mimi described as a coarse sexual advance,
although she unfortunately does not give the exact details of that.
Given the twenties, it might have been him complimenting her
hands or something. Yeah, completely innocent like that. We'll not
completely innocent. She was sixteen, he was thirty seven, but yeah,
do you know what I'm saying. Uh. Later in the dinner,
a guest asked Hitler why he wasn't married yet. This
was a pretty common question for Hitler to get. He
answered that, of course, he had to save Germany first.

(12:51):
According to Mimi, though at the exact same time, quote
Hitler touched my legs with his knee and heavily stepped
on my toes with his shoe. A funny and rude
hint at what he wanted to say. This works, this
works on maybe, she says it does at least, you know,
who knows if how accurate her recollections. I mean, I
get it because also like being a sixteen year old

(13:12):
girl at that point, it's this is like, it's all intoxicating,
This is all very um uh, it's all very complimentary.
And not that the two men are similar, but he's
like a similar level in national politics of someone like
Beta over work, where people are seriously talking this guy
might be in charge soon. So there's that there's that
dimension of this. Yeah, yeah, for sure. Well, and it's
also like, you know, you've been forced to drop out

(13:33):
of school by your dad, like your only Yeah, your
only way to a better life at this point is
probably through a man to another situation, Like you aren't
really probably you aren't being primed to take over a
business of your interne. Your dad's a member of like
the opposite political party, so maybe there's a little bit
of that going on to where she's dad's going to
really hate this. I'm bringing home the ultimate bad boy

(13:57):
kind of there's no better dating a bad way and
literally Hitler. Yeah seriously. Okay, So, based on what you
know about Hitler's game so far, what would you expect
his next step was after talking about his dead mom
and then stomping on a girl's foot. I mean, maybe
just like putting some of his dad's ashes on like

(14:21):
lipstick and asking for a kiss. Is that that would
actually be less creepy? He chose animal abuse. Oh, here's
here's Mimi reader quote. We went out into the night.
Hitler was about to put his arm around my shoulders
and pull me towards him when the two dogs suddenly
attacked each other. Hitler suddenly intervened like a maniac. He
hit his dog with his writing whip and shook him
violently by the collar. He was very excited. I did

(14:43):
not expect that he could hit his dog so brutally
and ruthlessly, the dog which he had said he could
not live without. Yet he beat up his most loyal companion.
How can you be so brutal and beat your dog
like that? I asked it was necessary, Hitler said, tenderly.
He touched my shoulders. His mouth changed. His voice sounded sad.
Don't you want to kiss me? He asked. She forces
herself to say no, that they shouldn't see each other again.

(15:05):
Hitler takes the reaction badly. He turned cold. Kindness disappeared
from his face. Abruptly. He turned away, said hil and left. Yeah.
I mean pro tip, Hitler, don't beat dogs on a
first date. Yeah, that's I shouldn't have to say that.
I shouldn't have to say don't be dogs. No, No No,
I shouldn't have said anyway. Maybe not on the first
you know, you don't do that. Most experts say animal

(15:27):
abuses like a third date thing exactly. That's when you
get that dog whip out, You and your goddamn whip
spoon to that dog that night and just whispered sweet
nothing in the poor dog's ear. Oh, I really feel
for that dog. All a Hitler's dogs, they just saw
so many sad masturbations. Yeah, absolutely did. We don't think

(15:48):
enough about the suffering dog kind went through during those years.
It was it was rough, I know. Yeah, poor babes. Yeah. Now, Hitler,
once rejected, was not about to give up on his
dreams of conquering this girl, literally less than half of
his age. He sent one of his men to Mimi's
store the next day. This guy told Memi that he'd
never seen the boss so filled with love. Believe me,

(16:10):
the man is on fire. Now. This got made me
to give Hitler a second chance. She agreed to a
second and it wasn't quite a date, but she agreed
to hang out with him again. He picked her up
at work and took her in a ride in his Mercedes.
He didn't drive, of course, his man more reshandled the driving.
Hitler couldn't drive. He sat next to Mimi in the back.
Quote he took my hand and put it into his lap.

(16:32):
Then he took my other hand as well and pressed it.
Now I have your hands, and I have you, and
I will keep you. Now. You know a big fan
of Hitler's Hitler's Hitler's moves. I don't like his moves.
I don't like what Mimi needed, Like, um, she needed
like a Wilson through the fence going like, oh, you

(16:52):
shouldn't be dating thirty seven year old Nazis. Yeah, yeah,
because she needed somebody to be on her side. Here girls,
an adult advice. I guess dad was grieving. I'm not
gonna I'm not gonna hit on him too hard, but
it is kind of a failure of parenting. If your
daughter dates Hitler when she's sixteen. You know, old kids
can date Hitler. That's their mistake to make exactly. There's

(17:13):
a couple of lessons that should have been taught better
parenting at a few levels in this story would have
really really helped with some problems. So uh. For their
next date, Hitler took her to a graveyard to see
her mom's grave. What happened next is just so strange
that I I'm gonna read explaining Hitler's description because it's
it's it's weird. Quote. Hitler's overcome thinking of his own mother,

(17:38):
moved by something he did not want to tell me.
What he said sounded very grave and utmost distressed, I
am not ready yet. Hitler, holding onto his writing whip,
comforts a sobbing Mimi, and strangely chooses that moment to
tell her, I want you to call me Wolf. That
was his preferred nickname Wolf. So he takes her to
his mom's grave or her mom's grave, says he's not
ready to fun, and then asks her to call him Wolf.

(18:00):
That was his favorite nickname. He thought it sounded cool.
He made all his friends call him Wolf. Secret headquarters
during the invasion of Russia was the Wolf's Layer. I'm
just saying you would have win one of those guys
with an un ironic wolf howling at the moon shirt.
You can't tell people your nickname. No, then it's not
a nickname. Then it's narcissism. If you get a cool nickname, congratulations,

(18:22):
but you gotta earn it. Yes, you don't get to
pick your own. Yeah, it's bullshit. You know what you
do get to pick of your own is the products
and services that you spend your money and or commerce
units to purchase ads. We're back back. We just enjoyed

(18:45):
the freedom of choice that Hitler would not have approved of. Although, actually,
if we're gonna be really honest. The Nazi regime was
seriously in bed with the capitalist interest in Germany at
the time, and phrase a lot of what they were
doing as a defension of free trade against unionism. But yeah,
that's a whole that's another part. Owners talking about his

(19:06):
dick today, not the entanglements of fascism and capitalism throughout history.
His little longer day. Yeah, a little little wolf Wolfie,
Wolfie Wolfie. So on. There. For fourth date, Hitler decided
to make his move on Mimi Reader. He took her
out for a walk in the woods and said romantic
things to her and then asked her to kiss him,

(19:28):
which is, you know, a pretty timeless move. That's a
pretty classic day. I mean, to be fair, we're going
we're going from mom's grave. Mom's grave. Well, no, we're
going from from like a dinner where he's given us,
from fascist political meeting. Date one where he beats a
dog at the end uh. Date two, middle aged guy

(19:48):
takes you on a ride in his Mercedes. Date three,
mom's grave tells you to call him wolf. And then
Date four walk in the woods. Okay, I mean the
most normal of the dates so far is the walk
in the woods yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah yeah. It's
a solid fourth. Date's a decent time to to make
that move if you're you know, she's sixty Jesus Hitler. Okay,

(20:12):
so here's mamie quote. I could feel how he clinched
his fists. I could see how he was fighting with himself,
my child, I could squash you in my arms. At
this very moment, I did not resist any longer. His
true self had come out. Yeah. This is what Hitler
says in this first kiss, maybe his first kiss ever,
maybe not um. Hitler told her that he wanted her
to have his blonde Arian babies, but wind that he

(20:33):
didn't have the time right now, what with his mission
to save Germany. How many times you just, I mean,
speaking as a man, we've all used that line. Oh yeah,
I gotta save Germany, baby, I just can't help it.
I just Germany. You know you're gonna last thirty seconds
a piece of ship, like please, you've got the time now.
Hitler promised to buy an apartment in Berlin for them

(20:54):
once you know, he was more successful with made promises
about the kind of the furniture they'd buy and all
this stuff. He told her they'd be together forever, but
then he left Berk's gotten and ignored her for months.
The worst Springsteen song. Yeah, he just ghost her, ghost
her for a long time. When he returned to the mountains,
finally he didn't visit her. Being a teenager, Mimi did

(21:15):
not take this very well. Yeah, yeah, yeah, it's okay, buddy.
If you're gonna we're gonna go here. Let's do this.
Let's do this. I mean, all sorts of pictures appeared
in my mind, faces of other women and Hitler smiling
at them. I did not want to go on living,
so she attempted suicide, trying to hang herself on a
door handle with a clothes line. Dah, Mimi, Yeah, yeah,
she went for it. Her brother in law came in

(21:38):
at the last minute and saved her. And according to Mimi,
her brother in law had came to save her after
he had gotten a message from Hitler that Hitler had
just sent to him explaining that he hadn't been seeing
Mimi recently because he'd been blackmailed by someone who had
sent a letter to the Nazi Party office claiming that
Hitler was seducing underage girls. So basically months later, Hitler
comes in and is like, uh, you know, somebody was

(22:00):
talking about us and I had to like go dark
because it would hurt the success of my political party.
If like we'd kept our thing up, that's excuse, the
truth would have come out. And oh so it's like
he knows it's not supposed to be doing that. Yes,
and this is not a lot of times when you
talk about people dating teenagers or whatever in the past.
It was definitely more normal back then. Again, this was
a political liability for a thirty seven year old. It

(22:23):
would have been weird. If he'd been twenty five and
dating a sixteen year old, that would have been pretty
normal for Austria in nineteen This is weird. Yeah, yeah,
what he's doing is weird and he knows it. Yeah.
Uh So. Mimi claims that she found out later that
the letters you know, sent into the Nazi party office
were actually written by a woman who was close to
Hitler and jealous of his relationship with Mimi. It was

(22:45):
possibly this lady who was like his bodyguard slash chauffeur,
who was like in love with him that he may
have also fucked. We don't really know that much about
that relationship. There's a lot of rumored relationships that we
don't have confirmation of, But one thing that is confirmed
is the not these were unbelievably caddy bitches. There was
tons of tons of blackmail within the Nazis. Gross, and

(23:06):
they were all fucking with each other. Yea. And they're
all fucking messy. Just a bunch of messy bitches for
messy messy bitches. Yeah, that's the Nazis. So Mimi and
Hitler drifted apart for a while. The whole relationship was
a huge deal for her, but it seems to have
been more of a bump on the road for Hitler.
During this time, he repeatedly flirted with his best friend,
han Stengel's wife, as well as Henrietta Hoffman, the daughter

(23:27):
of his photographer and fiance of Balder von Sharrock, one
of his top Nazis. Hitler dated or at least made
moves on Jenny how one of his drivers, and the
bodyguard Lady I talked about maybe the woman who sent
the letter. It's hard to tell how true all the
different rumors about women might have been with with, but
it seems like by the mid twenties he's famous enough that,
like a lot of people are following for his charms. Yeah,

(23:48):
largely for his fame. According to Ian Kershaw quote. None
of his liaisons, it seems, had been more than superficial.
No deep feelings were ever stirred. Women were for Hitler
a sport, an adornment in a men's world, whether in
the men's home in Vienna, the regiment during the war,
the Munich barracks until his discharge, and his regular gatherings
of party cronies and Cafe Neumau or a Cafe Heck
in the nineteen twenties. Hitler's environment had always been overwhelmingly male.

(24:11):
Very occasionally a woman would be admitted into our intimate
circle recard recalled Heinrich Hoffman, but she never was allowed
to become the center of it, and had to remain
seen but not heard. She could occasionally take a small
part in the conversation, but never was she allowed to
hold forth or to contradict Hitler. I love a silent wife,
silent dumb. That's the way Hitler likes him. A silent,

(24:32):
quiet woman who's barely alive, God Hitler. Now. Hitler's next
confirmed fling was with Gilly Rouble, his half niece. Oh
six s here we go. You can't stop a Hitler
male from fucking his own niece cannot stay away from
It's a thing here. Two generations, you guys fucking they're

(24:55):
the same age when they start to Uh so he
met her when she was four eight years old. Her
father had died when she was young, and her mother
worked as a housekeeper. They were poor. Um Hitler did
wait until she was sixteen. Uh oh, well, what a gentleman,
What a gentleman. And that's the age when Uncle Alf
as she called him, asked her and her mom to
move to Munich and become his housekeepers. Now for them

(25:17):
it would have seemed like a real upgrade, because he
was a very powerful man by this point. He set
Gilly and Angela up in an apartment, and while her
mom cleaned house, Hitler took his teenage niece out on
the town. He found out she wanted to be a singer,
and R. Kelly like started paying for music lessons and
promising to make her famous, like sol track so tracks.
It's not just hit He wasn't just one of these guys.

(25:40):
He was all of them. Yeah, he's the prototype for
there's before him too. But it's like he really is
just greatest hits all around. How many was he into Jello?
What he was he drugging ladies? Yes? Is he like
super into Jello at any point? Yeah, I mean credit
where it's due. That might be an area where Cosby
innovated on Hitler. Yeah, yeah, right, although, yeah, there's some

(26:03):
other crimes coming up herself. Over the next year or so,
Hitler fell increasingly in love with his teenage niece. This
did not go over well with his inner circle. Han
Stengel hated Gilly, calling her an empty headed slut with
the coarse sort of bloom of a servant girl, which
is some real sexist, rich guyship. Yeah, please blame the
child that was brought here by the adult man in power.

(26:24):
Please please please. Yeah. Also, if he'd known Hitler's family history,
he would have known servants were sort of the family thing. Yeah,
that's kind of how it works out for them. Weird
that he and his dad both not only sleep with
their nieces but both bring them in as like serving girls.
How How where do you think Hitler was of that relationship.
I don't know. This is there's a lot of rumors

(26:48):
that he was to an extent and he was trying
to keep it hidden from people, because I'm just wondering
if that's like him trying to like normalize how his
parents got together in some way. Maybe he even was
thinking that consciously. I'm I'm certain it wasn't conscious, but
that may that may have been a factor, and being
like wanting to sort of be like, well, no, you know,
if I'm like the biggest man in Germany and this
is what I do, then it wasn't messed up. How

(27:09):
I grew up fine, and I don't have to think
about it that much. Yeah, exactly. No. My my mother,
aunt wife, my mother, aunt wife, cousin. Yeah. So Putsy
had to admit still that the infatuation his fewer had
with this teenage girl was pretty significant. He said that
she quote had the effect of making him behave like
a man in love. He hovered at her elbow in

(27:30):
a very plausible imitation of adolescent infatuation. So Gelly wound
up having an affair with Hitler's longtime chauffeur, Emil Maurice.
Forgave her but fired Maurice when a local Nazi party
leader named munder wind that Gilly was distracting Hitler from politics.
Hitler fired Munder For a while, Gilly Rabul threatened to
derail the coming of the Third Reich entirely. Hitler started

(27:51):
canceling plans for speeches and meetings to take her on picnics. Now,
Gilly's probably the single most controversial piece of Hitler's backstory.
Off the top of my head, the only thing historians
debate more of viciferiously about Hitler is whether or not
he was like an active or passive participant in the Holocaust. Like,
those are like two of the things that are most
questioned about this guy. Um. The relationship is, among other things,

(28:14):
the origin of the Hitler liked poop myth. So that's
where we're going next. Oh hell yeah, you know. It's
just sometimes you think you're just gonna have a Friday,
and here it is, and here it is, here it is.
It does feel great. Hitler bought the gigantic apartment that
he had first promised Mimi Reader, but he was over her,
so he moved his seventeen year old niece, and Gilly's

(28:35):
mother was sent off to Berkis Godden to keep Hitler's
holiday at home clean and to keep her away from
Hitler and her daughter. So Gilly and Hitler lived in
separate bedrooms but on the same floor. Now, our main
sources for this particular story about the relationship come from
a journalist named Conrad Hayden and our old pal hun Stengel.
They also come from Gregor Strasser, a former Nazi who
fell out with Hitler. So all these stories are from

(28:56):
very anti Hitler people who have reason to exaggerate things
just far away. I bring that up. Yeah, so I
just like that. They've got a real like I Love
Lucy set up in their house. Oh yeah, it's very
much that, but with poop. So Vanity Fair quotes all
of these sources, and I'm going to read they're kind
of recollection of events. Starting with Heyden quote, Hitler wrote
the young girl a letter couched in the most unmistakable terms.

(29:17):
It was a letter in which the uncle and lover
gave himself completely away. It expressed feelings which could be
expected from a man with masochistic copperphile inclinations, bordering on
what hav Alock Ellis calls undinism. The letter probably would
have been repulsive to Gilly if she had received it,
but she never did. Hitler left the letter lying around
and fell into the hands of his landlady's son, a
certain doctor Rudolph. The letter was bound to the base

(29:38):
Hitler and make him ridiculous in the eyes of anyone
who might see it. Hitler seems to have feared that
it was Rudolph's intention to make it public. So coprophile
is obviously loving poop, and udinism is loving to be
urinated at all. So that's that's how this journalist sort
of describes this mythical letter that Hitler almost sends Gilly,
but it gets intercepted, and then another nazis like threatening
the blackmail hit Hitler with it. I again, that's an

(30:02):
intense letter. How many rough drafts you go do you
go through? For you telling your niece you want to
poop in her or be pooped in by her? Yeah,
I don't know, man, we'd have to ask John McAfee.
That so putsy hop Stengel told a pretty similar story
in his biography, but he claims that the pointographic content
was different. Rather than a letter about his desire to

(30:25):
be pooped in by Gilly, hom Stengel claims that the
thing that got intercepted was Hitler's nude sketches of his niece. Uh.
He describes the drawings as depraved, intimate sketches of Gilly
rabble with every anatomical detail, which could have meant that
it was something we'd consider really weird to be on
the pale, or could have meant that he was just
drawing point of a girl he thought was his girlfriend.

(30:46):
I mean girls, because she's his seventeen year old niece.
But it might not have been a poop thing. It
could just be like a nude photos. Now, the most
direct story we have, or most direct evidence we have
of the Hitler liked poop myth, comes from Auto Strasser. Now,
Otto was a leading figure in the Nazi Party for
a while and then fell a foul of the party.
His brother, who was also a Nazi, was murdered, and

(31:08):
Otto became like a critic of the regime, and he
wrote about this in a nineteen forty book that he
published after he had fallen out with the party. So
again grain assault. Here, Otto Strasser claims that basically, after
a period of excitement, Gilly got bored of being Hitler's girlfriend,
since Hitler believed he had to present an image of
being available and married to Germany. Hitler's handler's like kind
of thought that hitler sex appeal was a big part

(31:29):
of Nazism's draw and if he was known that he
had a girlfriend, like, women wouldn't vote for him and
then he wouldn't be able to win election, which they
may have been right about. There's something, I mean, there's
something there. I guess. Yeah, it's hard to say. This
was like pretty soon after women got the vote too,
so like people were I mean, people were sexist for
a lot of reasoning got a vote for available, sexy,

(31:49):
sexy Hitler. He sees my ballot, I'll get to be
Mrs Hitler. Yeah, exactly Hitler. So basically Strasser claimed that,
like Gilly was really bored all the time, and it's
like really frustrated and depressed at not being able to
go out with her boyfriend. And finally Hitler like allowed
him Strasser to take Gilly out to a Marty Girl
party because he was like, Okay, I'll let you do something,

(32:11):
but I can't go with you because it will look bad,
So you go with my friend. So Strasser claims that
during this party, they were sitting down at a table
and talking and she opened up to him with a
very emotional horror story. Quote from Strasser, Hitler made her
undress while he would lie down on the floor. Then
she would have to squat down over his face where
he could examine her at close range, and this made
him very excited. When the excitement reached its peak, he

(32:34):
demanded that she urinate on him, and that gave him
his sexual pleasure. Gilly said the whole performance was extremely
disgusting to her, and although it was sexually stimulating, it
gave her no gratification. So cool, cool, What a party?
What a party? The German parties man? Yeah, yeah, and again.
Strasser hated Hitler by that point, may have just been

(32:55):
trying to slander his name. Other reports of Gilly and
Hitler's relationship say that it was about as normal as
a actual liaison between a niece and her uncle could be.
We don't know what they got up to. What we
do know is that in nineteen thirty one, at the
cusp of Hitler reaching power, Mimi Reader came back into
his life. This is while he's living with Gilly. She's
like a legal age this time and not even related

(33:16):
to him. She's like eighteen now, So while Hitler's living
with and banging his niece. Uh, Mimi Reader comes you know,
into town. She'd married a guy in the intervening years,
but dumped him, you know, a little bit in and
basically traveled to Munich for a Hitler booty call. So
this is her version of events as described by the
book Explaining Hitler. She quote calls Hitler's adjutant Julia Schaub,

(33:39):
informed that Mimi is in town. Hitler tells Schaub bring
her over. Mimi places the episode that follows in the
summer of nineteen thirty one, when Hitler was living in
his big new apartment with Gilly Rouble. Now, Mamy claims
that during this visit, I let everything happen, so they
had sex. This is this is like one of the
first confirmations we have, and she doesn't give us a
lot of detail about this. We know that Hitler has
a booty call with Mimi in early you know, summer

(34:01):
or whatever, nineteen thirty one, and then not a whole
long while later, maybe just a couple of weeks, maybe
a few days, Kelly Rabble commits suicide. Yeah. Now, there
are a number of theories as to why. One says
she was jealous that Hitler had slept with Mimi, and
being nineteen at the time, took the most dramatic revenge
she could imagine. Another theory says she started an affair

(34:21):
with a Jewish dance teacher in Vienna and was about
to leave Hitler, and so he had her murdered. Some
the version say that he murdered her himself. Yet another
variant is that she wanted to leave for Vienna because
she was just bored, but he refused to let her go,
and she killed herself in protest, because again she was nineteen.
Either way, one detail is consistent across all these stories.
Skelly Robble entered Hitler's room, found his six point five

(34:43):
millimeter Mauser handgun, and shot herself dead through the chest,
which again is part of why people think it might
have been a murder because she shot herself chest. That's
a hard shot to take, But it's also not uncommon
for women who commit suicide with guns to avoid shooting
themselves in the head. Interesting. Wow, so nobody knows. This
is debated to this day. There are people right now

(35:04):
who are trying to have her body exhumed uh in
order to like to and like think that they found out,
like it's a big controversy and stuff. We don't we
don't really know what happened. It was a massive scandal
at the time. People thought it was going to derail
Hitler's political career. Right on the custom Prison too Power.
The Nazi Party immediately responded with like basically claiming that
she'd killed herself because she was nervous over an upcoming

(35:25):
music recital. The body was taken away courtesy of the
Bavarian Minister of Justice, who was a Nazi sympathizer. Um
her death was declared a suicide after a quick inquest.
It was all clearly shushed up by the Nazis government,
and like the fact that law enforcement was fans with
the Nazis. The whole story is it's really hard to
grasp exactly what happened here. There's certainly a good chance

(35:47):
she was murdered, but there's at least an equally good
chance that she was just driven to suicide by her
relationship with Hitler. Well, and she's also been like so
isolated at this point, like your whole world is this guy,
and he doesn't let you leave anywhere, and it's like, yeah,
I can see learning about him screwing Mimi when she's
living with him could have made her commit suicide. I
can see how she might not have known that at

(36:08):
all and have just been fed up by it. Yeah
for sure. Uh yeah, driving women to suicide, along with
flirting via whip was sort of Hitler's thing. Robert Waite,
a psychologist, wrote a psychoanalytical biography of Hitler titled The
Psychopathic God. Now, wait is like the first guy who
got Langer's oss report to classified, and he's definitely a
member of the Hitler was into weird ship sexually camp,

(36:30):
so a lot of his conclusions really debatable, but he
makes a decent case to suggest that Hitler was doing
something fucked up to the girls he liked. Quote. The
idea that Hitler had a sexual perversion particularly abhorrent to
women is further supported by a statistic. Of the seven
women who we can be reasonably reasonably sure had intimate
relations with Hitler, six committed suicide or seriously attempted. So damn, yeah,

(36:51):
so something something, something fucked up. God damn yeah, he's
he's up in some bad business. Doesn't have to be
kinky X. Even more likely, maybe that he's just really
emotionally abusive being Hitler. Yeah, yeah, something about you know,
he doesn't seem like a supportive boyfriend. Does not seem
like a supportive boyfriend. No, No, this is a guy.

(37:13):
He's yeah, he's he's we even some bullshit in your ears.
Suicide is the single biggest through line, rather than poop,
of Hitler's sex life. Eva Brown, who was Hitler's wife eventually,
who Hitler met in nineteen twenty nine and while she
was seventeen years old and he was in his forties,
attempted suicide in nineteen thirty two and again in nineteen
thirty five, and then obviously committed suicide with him in
nineteen forty five. There were two attempts before that point

(37:35):
while they were still together. Yeah wow, well, wells, we'll see,
we'll talk about that. Frau Ingle, another possible Hitler lover,
successfully committed suicide, so did Renette Mueller and Susie Liptower.
We don't know a lot about most of these relationships. Gilly,
Mimi and Eva are the only women we get a
lot of detail about, and Mimi is the only lover
who survived fucking Hitler long enough to give it a

(37:56):
tailed interview. Uh, it turns out that being in love
with the leader of the German Reich was even more
dangerous than fighting in Stalingrad. So we're going to talk
about why that may have been and about some of
the things that we do know about his sex life
from some of these women, the other details. But first
is an ad transition. Yeah, let's do some ads. Let's

(38:18):
do some ads. Don't think about Hitler sweaty balls. Well,
you think about these products. Damn it, that's a really
bad ad pivot. I'm glad Sophie's not here. She's gonna
be really pissed at that. Um uh products, We're back.

(38:40):
What a nice break from thinking about his shitty sweaty balls.
Shitty sweaty balls or who knows well, as doctor said,
not but okay, I don't know. It's a good song. Uh. So.
One of the women who committed suicide and is believed
to have been a lover of Hitler was a Rent Mueller.
Uh she was an actress and she got to tell

(39:00):
a little bit of her story before leaping out of
a window and falling to her death in n seven.
Damn Yeah, so I'll quote Vanity Fair. These stories came
from the guy who was her director, so we don't
have her directly being quoted on this. The guy who
worked with her later told the OSS about like what
had gone down between them quote her director one A.
Zeisler later told the OSS that she had confided in

(39:22):
him shortly after spending a night with Hitler in the
Reichs Chancellory, how distressed she was that the nature of
the sexual practices Hitler demanded of her, of which, to
her mortification, she complied. She claimed Hitler fell on the
floor and begged her to kick him, condemned himself as unworthy,
and just grappled in an agonizing manner. The scene became
intolerable to her, and finally she acceded to his wishes.
As she continued to kick him, he became more and

(39:44):
more excited. Yeah, so that's a really different one. That's
like the Hitler liked being, And that's to me more
believable than some of the like a lot of powerful
men they want to sex workers, Like that's what these
guys go in for. Yeah, yeah, exactly like they want
to be. They want to be the sub. I don't
have any trouble imagining Hitler wanting a woman to just
kick him a bunch. Now he like masterbates on the floor.

(40:04):
That's yea, yeah, that's kind of sounds like the Hitler
we know. Yeah now that that that definitely sounds way
more because it's like there's a lot of self hate
going on. So it's like being able to actually like
exercise that party yourself. Yeah, that seems for sure. Yeah,
I can see how that happened. Uh, And that also
just makes a lot of sense with like, um, it

(40:25):
would be very difficult to reconcile those two things if
you were a woman that knew that versus the image
of the world that Hitler that you knew, So that
would be I mean, I can see how that would
help with the suicide or it's it's there's also a
lot of people who suspect that she did not commit suicide,
that she was murdered because she knew about Hitler's sexual

(40:45):
preferences because she was kind of you know, dropped out
type of a window in nine seven might have been thrown.
We'll never know. This whole state was controlled by the
Nazis by that point, so you're not getting a good
in quest or anything. Well, it's like, how many of
these women, Like, was it actually suicide versus murder? Well,
that's that everyone nobody knows. With Gilly, I like, it's
possible they were all murdered and none of them killed themselves.
A man with Hitler, I don't have trouble believing, like

(41:07):
Eva Brown definitely tried to kill herself beforehand, So I
also I suspect it's a mix. I suspect one or
two of these women were murdered someone whom committed suicide.
Whatever the case, being with Hitler is not great for
her long terms. Good again, Mimi Reader is the only
one we get along, which you know, she's kind of
Hitler is the romance character and her recollection of things,

(41:29):
but like she lived through it. If that seems to
be pretty hard. Damn really dodged a bullet there, the
bullet Eva Brown did not dodge. Now, I think people
who focus too much on the possibility of sexual deviance
and Hitler kind of might have some kind of bad
intentions under the surface. I feel like focusing on that

(41:51):
on like the weird sex aspect of things, is a
way to make him seem less scary, Like calling him
a sexual serial killer actually makes him less area because
if Hitler is like a serial killer doing all of
these things because he's just Jeffrey Dahmer in charge of
a nation. Or if he's some poop feeding sex monster,
then he's not a normal human being like all of us. Yeah, exactly. Well,

(42:11):
and it's also like that's also demonizing those sexual practices
where it's like, you know, your kinks to your kinks,
as long as they're consensual, there's something the matter with them.
Whether or not Hitler was pooping in people's mouths, A
lot of people who didn't become Hitler were pooping in
each other's mouth and it's fine. Yeah, yeah. Now. Martin Amos,
best selling English author, is very much a proponent of
the weird sex view of Hitler. He was behind one

(42:33):
of these recent waves of Hitler kink stories, one that
hit back in two thousand and fourteen because during a
speech he started making claims that he believed he basically
claimed that this was a typical sexual encounter in the
life of Alf Hitler. Quote, he would fortify his underpants
with clean serviettes and napkins, and then he would go
into some sort of excitation with Ava Brown, staying at
a safe distance. So Amos believes that, and I'm going

(42:55):
to quote from an article about him. There are three
schools of thought when it comes to hitler sexuality. One
of normality, which Amos says that he can be immediately
thrown out because it is impossible to see Hitler is
a considerate and energetic lover. The next one is a sexuality,
and the third is perversion. Now, this belief is in
line with what spurned Nazis like han Stengel and Strasser claim,
and is also in line with the Languor report, but

(43:17):
very much out of line with the recollections of Mimi Reader,
who probably did fuck him and says that he was
pretty normal outside, like he was a weird guy, but
like in terms of the way he fucked nothing that
crazy um. Hitler sister Paula does believe Mimi Reader was
like the love of Hitler's life, and a lot of
other people will say that Gilly was the love of
his life. It's impossible to know maybe he cared that
much about any of them. I don't know if he's
actually capable of love. That's a great question. And and

(43:40):
one of the reasons that like like Herman Garring is
one of the people who's like he was different after Gilly.
Like a lot of a lot of people who wound
up in trial after World War Two were the biggest
proponents of the Hitler totally changed after his niece killed herself.
And there's some suspicion among historians that like, well, you're
just trying to like make it seem make yourself seem
less comple is it, and that like, no, when I

(44:01):
got involved with this guy, he was a normal dude
and then he went crazy and I, you know it
wasn't I I did, you know? It was out of
my hands. Also, what a way to blame it on
a woman. I mean the somersaults that people will pull
to blame everything on a woman. It's it's amazing. And

(44:21):
it comes down to like the ultimate example of that
is not to throw a shade on Simon Wiesenthal because
he's a hero, but like the Hitler got syphilis from
a Jewish prostitute. It's like both blame it on a
Jewish person and on a woman. There we go, yeah,
oh cool, that just what a what a neat little
bu little bow. We wrapped that up and he couldn't
help it. Yeah, So this like the attitude that Hitler

(44:45):
was just like sort of irredeemably weird and couldn't possibly
have attracted a woman naturally, and there was always strange.
It's not only out of line with what like made
me read reported, it's out of line with like what
his friends who didn't go on trial for war crimes
reported from this stage of his life. We I I
found an interview in time with a Carl Wilhelm Krauss,
who worked as Hitler's ballet for five years from thirty
four to thirty nine. They were like friendly, uh, and

(45:08):
here's what Krause reported quote. What I can state here
is that Hitler certainly did not hate women. Proof of
this are the many actresses who were invited along during
the early years to afternoon and evening performances. Often during
our travels, he would suddenly be totally enchanted, exclaiming, My God,
isn't that a beautiful girl? He then turned around, making
me who was behind him moved to the sides that
he had an undrestricted view behind him and could follow

(45:28):
the lady with his gaze if in any given place
an exceptionally beautiful woman would catch his eye. Bruckner more
often than not had to find out her address. After that,
the lady was invited for coffee either to Munich Berlin
or the ober Saltzberg, just so Hitler could have a
chat with her. That sounds like normal, famous, famous That
sounds like fucking any rich, famous guy in l A
seeing a girl who thinks he's cute and having someone

(45:48):
from his entourage go down there. Oh yeah, absolutely, that's classic.
Sounds like normal famous dude behavior. Uh. John Tolin talked
to Emil Maurice, Hitler's longtime chauffeur, and uh, there's the
guy who made love to Gilly and then got fired.
But they were He and Hitler were close for a
long time, and despite being exiled by Hitler for fucking
his niece, Emil Maurice gave a pretty reasonable appraisal of

(46:09):
his old boss's sex life, quote, we chased girls together
and I used to follow him like a shadow. The
two would spend time at the Art Academy and an
artist studio's admiring models posing in the nude. Calling himself
Harry Wolf, Hitler would occasionally pass an evening with Maurice,
roaming the night spots and streets for girls. Since the
latter was attractive, to women. He would act as a
go between every so often. According to Maurice, Hitler would

(46:29):
entertain one of these conquests by proxy in his little room.
He always offered flowers, even when he was penniless, And
we used to go out and admire the ballet dancers.
Sounds again, normal hot friend wingman for him, Like yeah,
that's all standard. Yeah again, these are like the and
this is a guy you'd expect Emil Maurice would have
bad ship to say about Hitler, but like, there's nothing
about that. I don't believe that sounds like a million guys. Yeah, yeah, yeah,

(46:52):
there's nothing. Ultimately, there's nothing special about Hitler whatsoever. Like
it's like, there's that's the conclusion you're drawing too. Now.
The last destination on our tour to Hitler's love life is,
of course, his relationship with Eva Brown or Brown Uh.
Eva was, as I stated, seventeen when they met. She
had been educated in a convent like Mimi Reader and

(47:13):
worked at Heinrich Hoffman, his photographer's shop, you know he
she was working there when Hitler met her. Now, this
is during the same year that Gilly and Hitler were
supposedly in the midst of the greatest romance of his life,
so they were living together in a relationship at this
point when he meets and invites Eva Brown out to
the opera, he probably started sucking her on the side
while he was still with his niece, and then at
one point fooling around with Mimi. So there's a point
in time when Hitler's like fooling around with three ladies,

(47:35):
one of whom lives with him, uh, and not telling
any of them about this. I mean that's also standard
standard for guy. Yeah exactly, none of this is weird. Yeah, yeah,
you're in like you you're you're in the power that
you've craved for so long. So we're gonna like, you know,
a bunch of ladies. Yeah, yeah, exactly. And like the
Eva Brown's two suicide attempts, one of them coincides with

(47:56):
like when Mimi would have come over, and when like
Gelly would have killed herself, and one of them coincides
with another potential person that we think Hitler might have
been sucking around with. So it's very possible that Eva
Brown's early suicide attempts in thirty two and thirty five
were because she was a teenager hooking up in an
angry man in his forties who played mind games with
her and fucked around on the sly. Yeah no, I
mean not all about that. Tracks tracks so much better

(48:18):
than sexual serial killer. Yeah yeah. Now, Eva Brown makes
is someone who I'd never really had makes sense to
me as a historical character before. But she makes so
much sense if you think of her as a sensitive,
artistic young woman dating a really really abusive dude that
she's in love with. Eric Kempa, another Hitler chauffeur, called

(48:40):
her the unhappiest woman in Germany. I really like Eva
Brown is portrayed by the offered Jane Tyne. Now. Jane
is a romance writer, mostly romantic historical fiction from what
I can tell, but she's also written some serious historic essays,
and the one of hers that I read was pretty good.
I like the way she presents Eva because, as a
general rule, brilliant as they are, most of great Hitler

(49:00):
biographers are male and kind of suck at getting into
Ava Brown's head even a little bit. So I'm gonna
read a quote from Jane kind of describing Ava Brown
a little differently than I had heard her describe before.
Quote from Eva's letters, we learned that her parents disapproved
and that Hitler would frequently ignore her in public, merely
passing her an envelope of money until the end of
the At the end of the evening, when she was
finally a lot of room in the Berlin Chancellery, she

(49:22):
was forced to use a back entrance in case anyone
saw her. Hitler and his henchman tried their hardest to
keep Eva out of the spotlight and forbade any picture
of her to be published because they were keen to
project the idea that he was married to Germany. Yet
Eva herself ensured the opposite for posterity. She was an
early adopter of cine film and made endless home movies.
Today she would have been constantly on Facebook, instagramming her

(49:43):
meals and taking selfies at the Berghoff. One of her
more astonishing ambitions was to star one day in a
biopic of her life with the man she always called Wolf.
So yeah, she's sounds like a pretty normal teenager dating
a famous guy exactly. I also like what Jane has
to say about the Hitler is Weird at sex Smith's
because I think what she says rings true with an

(50:04):
awful lot of the other research I've read quote it
is impossible to peer behind the bedroom door. But suggestions
that Hitler was sexually avoid because of his obsession with
hygiene is contradicted by observers of the time, who suggests
that Hitler and Eva did share a bed as a
couple the interconnecting bedrooms at the Berghoff and Hitler's ballet.
Heinz Ling attests that they would go to bed together
while Hitler's made Pauline Kohler wrote that Hitler is not

(50:26):
strongly sexed. Ava Brown's correspondence reveals nothing unusual, certainly not
on the lines of fully clothed sex, except that once
war had broken out, Hitler wasn't able to get interested.
She used to show her friends in nineteen thirty eight
photograph of Neville Chamberlain on a sofa in Hitler's Munich flat, saying,
if only he knew what goings on that sofa has
seen like we fucked on the sofa, and then the

(50:47):
Prime Minister of England said on it that sounds like
a normal teenager, like yeah, yeah, yeah. So if you're
still on the fence, if you're still on team. Hitler
was a kind of demonic sexual force rather than just
a gross shitty dude whound up in power through cunning
and luck in the cowardice of arrogant men. Well, I'd
like to read one more Hitler story. Mimi Reader came

(51:08):
back to Hitler after their nineteen thirty one liaison. Uh.
This was a nineteen thirty four when Hitler was in power.
Gilly had been dead for three years, her room had
been turned into a shrine, and Hitler was unofficially with
Ava Brown. Now Eva doesn't live with him at this point,
because of course he's got to appear married to Germany,
That old, that old Germany. This gave dear Feur the

(51:30):
ability to invite Mimi in when she knocked on his door.
I'm going to quote from explaining Hitler's right up of
Mimi's recollections. Quote. Once again, the relationship came to life
once again. He asked her to stay with him as
his lover. She insists she will not be part of
an illicit relationship. She wanted to be married and to
have children. Suddenly, Hitler had a fit of rage. He shouted,
why do you women only think of having children? He

(51:50):
kept shouting. It was around three am that he could
not take care of a woman. He shouted that he
had a big mission to fulfill. They argued for two
more hours than they departed, never to see each other again.
Who dodged several bullets? Mimi, you really did? And yeah,
it's also so crazy because it's like, Okay, you're going

(52:11):
after women that are raised in convents, motherfucker, like the
only purpose for sex in the Catholic Church is procreation,
and then you're mad at them, like you're taught all
the same ship. Oh god, Yeah, I think what like
maybe Hitler was in the poop and pee and maybe
he liked sex with clothes on. Maybe not. At the

(52:34):
end of the day, the overwhelming picture I'm left with
a Hitler is that he was the same Like every
woman has dated a shitty guy just like Hitler. They
just didn't wind up in charge of the country. Yeah, exactly.
He's like a selfish, fucking idiot dude that needs to
go to therapy. He's selfish, he's famous, and he's going
to take as much advantage of that as he can.

(52:55):
He's a habitual liar because he's fucking Hitler, and he's
a motion only abusive and he screams when he doesn't
get his way. Ye, Like, yeah, it's a he's a
gas lighting piece of ship. Yeah, he's a Yeah, Hitler
turns out piece of ship. Hitler turns out piece of ship.
But not like, of course he's a bad person, but
he's not. Like what's scarier to me about this is that,

(53:19):
like there's nothing special about him. Yeah, he's just classic
piece of ship. It's just a normal piece of ship. Yeah,
it's nothing out of the ordinary. And that means, like
the good thing that means is that like we we
as human beings, will never deal with supernatural evil settling
down upon the world and forcing a nightmare regime on us.

(53:40):
But it also means that there's millions of guys like
this walking around who if they ever gotten to power,
this is that kind of potential exactly. So this is
the this is the blueprint for those kind of guys. Yeah. Yeah,
and that's why when you look at the fucking evolution
of in cell culture on the Internet, they're really in
the Nazis. Yeah, and they're really into isis too. They

(54:01):
love them both. Yeah, they love the murder and the
hatred and like the ability to do violence on like
a world you feel is wrong to you, And yea,
they all have issues with women, and none of them fuck,
and none of them like ask why a woman might
not be into them immediately. They all have that reaction
when like a buddy's like, maybe just learned to dance
or whatever. That's the fucking Hitler. I want people to

(54:27):
like think about when they imagine what kind of man
could do the things he did, The kind of guy
whose friend is like, well, maybe learn to dance and
that girl who likes dancing will be interested in you,
And he just starts screaming like there's is if I
could improve? Yeah, exactly, I'm already a perfect being. I
am a perfect being me fourteen year old Horny Hitler
is Yeah, no, that's kin Hitler. Yeah, I mean Hitler.

(54:51):
He's the worst. I mean, but he's not, is the
thing exactly, he's not. He's like, he's perfectly average. Yeah,
he's He's a perfectly average, shitty person who wound up
in a position of power and did the kind of
things that like, comparing him to a serial killer is wrong.
Comparing him to one of these in cell kids who

(55:12):
goes on a mass shooting rampage or drives a van
into a sorority house or whatever to kill. That's who
to compare him to. Yeah, that's much more accurate, Yeah
for sure. And he I think that that is one
way to look at sort of the Holocaust, is that
like it was a reaction of like anger at not
winning this war and wanting to do as much damage
as you could. And there's like an attitude of that

(55:32):
about like the destruction of Berlin that like the reason
he didn't pull out of Berlin, or the reason he
didn't surrender and just shoot himself that way and spare
the city and people. As he was like, no, if
we're gonna lose, all of us are going to die,
fucking Germany taking everybody with me. You didn't fain hard
enough for me exactly. Like that was literally like some
of the ship he would say, is that, like if
Germany doesn't win, we deserve to be destroyed. Like he's

(55:53):
just a shitty, angry little prick with a temper who
you know if if I mean get man like to
get really dark on you. Maybe in a society where
young men like that go on mass shooting spreeze, they're
less likely to become hitler like I don't know if
that's like good or whatever, but like Hitler doesn't have
that option and just becomes Hitler. Like we're in dark

(56:13):
territory here, But I do think he's that kind of guy. Yeah. Well,
and it's also like it's being raised to think that
you were special and then having the having that lie
because nobody's special's special. There's a lot of people out
there handler well, and like that's that's the big thing
about so many of these intel guys is like they're

(56:34):
raised to think that they're like the princes of their
own little kingdom. Mama's boys, a mama's boy, Bruce V
that pick up artist why living in his mom's basement,
talking about how the Jews are behind everything, like it
just keeps happening. Well, and then they're mad at they
desperately need a woman. But they're mad at a woman
because they think a woman sees them as weak, because

(56:55):
they need them to feel special. Yeah, the idea that
like a relationship with it give and take, and that
you both have things to teach each other. Like he
doesn't want to be taught anything, no, no, no, no no,
he just wants pure allegiance, which is why he goes
after sixteen year olds. Yeah, probably why his dad went
after sixteen year olds, absolutely repeatedly. Yeah, it's a power trip,
it's a power trip. Yeah. You don't want equal of

(57:17):
any kind, you know, fucking terrifying. Yeah yeah, yeah, no,
just a real piece ship. So if you've ever wondered
what happens if you give one of those in cells
on Reddit the most powerful military force in continental Europe
it was World War Two, that's what happens. Yeah, no, exactly,

(57:39):
they'll just keep pushing boy, Howdie Hitler. Yeah, so teach
your sons to dance. Teach your sons to dance. And
that's the only thing we've learned today. Teach your sons
to dance. You can dance if you want to. Ye.
Make make sure if you vote for someone, they don't
date teenagers, at the very least, at the released, at

(58:01):
the very least mature. They're not dating teenagers, because that's
how you get Hitler's. Yeah, that's how you get Hitler's.
Don't let them funk their niece. Yeah. Can you make
eye contact with a woman of your age without being
filled with rage? Yeah? Yeah? Are you? Are you capable
of like having a conversation with a woman without screaming, like, yeah, exactly. Also,

(58:24):
are you capable of like seeing your dog misbehave without
beating it and choking it and scaring a teenager? Yep? Hitler,
God just um kind of man. There's his German shepherd
didn't finish the job early. Yeah, no, I mean it
was a goat that supposedly been off his dick. I
wish that goat. I just ate the whole Hitler. Yeah, exactly,

(58:46):
chew that tin can up. How different the world would
be if we just had like a weird did you
know that back in like the nineteen o nine a
goat ata boy? What if like in the future, the
only animals that can time traveler goats. So we did
try to kill Hitler, but he only bit his The
goat only just just got part of his dick. It was,

(59:07):
and we actually just really made it worse than it
was in the first place. Yeah, it would have been fine.
Otherwise he would have just went on to become a
I don't know, like a like a sub and a dungeon.
I feel like that's the thing Hitler might have been
happy with it, really gotten in touch with his demons. Yeah,
for sure, he just wanted to be whipped. That's why
he carried a whip with him everywhere. Yeah, somebody with

(59:27):
me admitting that takes some courage that it does. It does?
I mean it still does, you know. Like it's the
more open people can be about the kinks and stuff
like that, the and the more open sexually, the world
can be more accepting than I think the lists. That's
why I say this every day. I say it a
lot to my roommates, to police officers during traffic stops.

(59:51):
More dominatrix is the only thing that will protect us
from more Hitler's truly, absolutely, that's I think the note
we're gonna end on Brandy, We're gonna plug plus. Yeah.
You can find me on Twitter and Instagram at brand Dazzle.
My website is Brandy Posey dot com Brandy with an
I E Posey with E y Um. I have an
album available wherever you listen to albums. It's called Opinion Cave.

(01:00:14):
It's very funny. Feel free to buy it um. And
then I have a podcast called Lady to Lady Um
to Me Barbara Gray and Tessa Barker, and then we
have a fourth guest on every week past guests have
included people like Karen Cooke Garreff or French Stewart or
Margaret Show. It's really really fun podcast, UM. And then
I have a monthly show here in Los Angeles on
the second Saturday every month called Picture This and that's UM,

(01:00:37):
a show that I've hosted for six years where we
pairent comedians with animators. I've animate your jokes behind you
during your set. It's like you riffing within your own bits.
And we get like really insane artists to come to
the show all the time, like we've had Pendleton Ward
from Adventure Time. Craig Bartlett, the creator of Hey Arnold
has been on recently. And then we have people from
amazing shows like Bujeck, Horsemen and Big Mouth and Mr

(01:00:58):
Pickles and it's it's a real, real great fun time. UM.
That's the second Saturday. And that's some music of my alarm.
That's for no good reason, oh boy, but yeah those
are my plugs. Come see me at all the ship guys. Well,
if you if you currently know a young man who
you're worried is going down a hitlery path, tune them

(01:01:19):
into those shows. Maybe maybe open up his mind. A
little bit to some progressive comedy. Get him some dance
lessons to listen to my podcast, have a couple of men,
have me here, a couple of men laugh at themselves,
and you know, realize that it's okay. Yeah, yeah, yeah yeah.
Let's get him out there to get him a hug
or hire a goat to bite his dick off. Either way,

(01:01:42):
you know it's up to you to fight the Hitler's
in your life. We all encounter a couple of Hitlers
out there. Hey, time traveling goats listening out there, Finish
the job next time, finish the job and metroactively render
this episode pointless. I am Robert Evans. You can find
us online Behind the Masters dot com. You can find
me on Twitter at I write Okay. The book culled
a brief history of vice, where I do drugs, which

(01:02:04):
of Hitler had done more of when he was young,
and that when he was old he might have also
come to some better conclusions about Zigo. I'm the podcast
the ad Bastard spot on Twitter and Instagram by a
T shirt Behind the Bastards to public uh funk Hitler.
I love forty percent of you.