July 29, 2015 • 41 mins
Throwing Shade is podcasting's funniest weekly commentary on feminist and LGBT issues. Cristen and Caroline talk to comedians and hosts Erin Gibson and Bryan Safi about how they met at Current TV, how comedy intersects with their activism and the importance of listening to your inner witch.
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:03):
Welcome to Stuff Mom Never Told You From how Supports
dot Com. Hello, and welcome to the podcast. I'm Kristen
and I'm Caroline, and listeners, we have a hilarious interview
for you today because we're talking to some improvisers slash
(00:24):
comedians slash podcast host Aaron Gibson and Brian Soffi. So,
Brian and Aaron both come from that great improvisation background.
They are comedy veterans who moved to Current TV, which kristin,
that's where you first saw Aaron, right, Yeah, So Aaron
Gibson hosted a segment on the Current TV show Infomania
(00:48):
called Modern Lady, and I saw it before Stuff Mom
Never Told You really got started, and she was doing
exactly the kind of stuff, only a lot funnier that
we do now on the podcast, taking these closer examinations
of how media represent and sell to women. And at
(01:10):
the time, she was, like you said, working with Brian Safie,
who was another host on Infomania, who did a segment
called That's Gay, and they took those a lot of
what they were doing in those two segments talking about
women and l g B t Q representation and now
transitioned it into this hilarious podcast Throwing Shade, and you
(01:34):
can also hear a lot of their UCB improv background
coming through on the podcast as well, because they just
have that quick, improvisational and comedic rapport. Yeah. I loved
hearing them talk about using their comedy, not only their
comedic background, but their comedy skills to talk about more
(01:55):
serious issues out there in the news. And speaking of
serious issues, caarly, we should probably give listeners a rundown
of how Throwing Shade works so that they'll understand why
we ask Brian and Aaron at one point in our
interview how they pick out their shoes. Yeah, we we
don't mean their footwear, although I am curious. Yeah, I
wish we had asked them about their footwear now. So
(02:17):
each week on Throwing Shade, they talk about two issues,
which say shortened two shoes because that just makes things
more fun. And Aaron picks a shoe focused on women,
Brian picks a shoe focused on lgbt Q stuff, and
they talk about it and they throw lots of shade
sometimes and they improvise and they make hilarious jokes and
(02:40):
it's fantastic and really fun to hear similar kinds of
things that we talk about on the podcast, but presented
in uh, shall we say a body or kind of way? Well, Kristen,
now that we've teased everyone with body conversation and body tease,
and oh well, let's just let the interview roll. Yeah, well, uh,
(03:05):
Brian and Aaron. For listeners who haven't heard throwing shade,
how would you two describe it? A descent into madness
but seeing in on math? Yeah, truly. What we do
is we each take a look. Aaron takes a look
at issues affecting women. I take a look at issues
affecting gay people, and we just treat those issues with
(03:27):
very little respect, go off into tangents about them, turn
them into ridiculous characters, and sort of make fun of
the people who are causing problems in this country. Perfect. Well,
so how would you guys describe each other? Though? Oh um, oh,
(03:47):
Brian's white. Yes, how we described I feel like we do.
I think we do a thing on the show where
we take take turns being straight man, uh don person,
and we kind of like balance that pretty flawed and flawlessly,
like we just we try. We like we both like
(04:08):
being a straight man. We both like being the clown,
so I feel like we've traded off that pretty well.
Brian's way more silly, You're sillier. You like nonsense, You're
more confident with nonsense. Thank you. I like being dirty, yes,
And I think like I think we like. I don't know.
What I think Aaron does so well is going from
(04:33):
taking a making a really super smart point and then
making a dumb one seamlessly um and can flip from
one to the next without hesitation, And I think so yeah.
I think what's interesting about our relationship is that there's not,
like Aaron said, there's not really a straight man in
this dynamic. We both love being silly, and we both
(04:55):
love being serious and wrong and wrong for the for
the reasons of just being funny. Yes, you know, we
defend we When we started the show, we started it
out of just a We had done another show where
we did similar pieces, but it was on a television network,
so we didn't have a lot of freedom. But one
of the reasons that we really wanted to start the
(05:15):
show so we could do exactly what we want on
the show. And I think what we want and what
we like is very similar. So that's kind of one
thing that I think makes our show. Um, that's why
why we're basically always on the same page. Well, that's
really interesting. UM, I was watching some Current TV, which
(05:36):
is the network you were talking about where you did
the segments Brian you hosted That's Gay and Erin you
hosted Modern Lady, And could you talk a little bit
then about um, just for listeners who might not be
aware of kind of the format of those and how
podcasting has maybe allowed you to take that even further. Yes.
(05:56):
So for for me, for That's Gay, it was really
just scouring every news station everything that talked about but
That's Gay essentially looked at how gay people and gayness
in general was perceived by the often clueless media. So
we would find a ton of clips to support our arguments,
like if I was talking about how gay characters in
(06:19):
commercials are sometimes very hidden, or if I was talking
about how the gay best friend is sort of become
this weird, horrible archetype in uh television and in movies,
we would have to find all the clips to support
those arguments. It was a pretty exhaustive research wise. And
then the points we would make because we each just
had segments that they would break out online. We're about
(06:40):
three minutes each. So we got to make a point.
But we had to do it very very quickly and
very very succinctly, and there really wasn't any time to
sort of go off into our own senses of humor
and and really like I don't know, sort of go
into the silly territory and really say everything we wanted
to say. It sort of had to be packaged very
succinctly and very nicely. I enjoyed that a lot, and
(07:02):
backed up by almost like an academic filter. Um, hence
all the research, Like here's here's my opinion, but I
also have to back it up with all these facts, right,
Like I can say gay people are often used, it's
just these magical best friends on television shows, but then
I have to find ten examples of it from television
shows to prove that point. So it was it was
(07:22):
very exhausted, but it was also it was a cool thing.
But this is just so much better to take a story,
really think about your opinion on it, and then just
go like full throttle, you know, pedal to the metal
on exactly what you think of it, and get filthy
with it, get crazy with it and just exhaust every
other part of it. We don't have a boss, and
(07:43):
we don't have a network. We we have no one
telling us what we can't do. Really, the only checks
and balances we have are people tweeting at us, going,
I didn't like that you said the word panty putting
this week, and then we can go, Okay, we're probably
going to say that again, but thanks for letting us know. Um,
some past wasn't vegan friendly enough, is it because of
(08:07):
the Sunday Chickens. Yes, it might be. And you know
a lot of people don't know this, but our show
in in Bomania and not nin Bomania, which is what
my aunt thinks it's called, or was called. UM which
was on Current TV, was started by Madeline Smithberg, who
also started The Daily Show, so we had a lot
(08:28):
of what we did had roots and how the Daily
Show also researchers or some if you notice, like when
John Stewart like makes his point, there's a lot of
media footage that backs it up. And so we were
kind of doing that in a very distilled way through
the scope of women's issues and gay issues, and UM
I thought I always felt a little bit shackled by
(08:48):
that because I didn't love the idea that we had
to I like having the knowledge and having the stuff
to back it up, but I don't necessarily like being like, well,
it's not your opinion unless it's happening seventeen time times,
because there's not always. There's not always. Sometimes you have
like your witch gut that you have to trust, like, oh,
I think this is a problem. Like, for example, I
did a whole segment on how every single woman on
(09:11):
detective shows on TV have been either a victim of
rape or or or or a child of rape, and um,
you know, there there's not a lot of female detectives
on TV, and most of them were either like had
some like sexual um trauma trauma in their past. Um.
(09:32):
But I mean, is it like an epidemic that's facing women,
like affecting women's lives. No, But I think it's an
important thing to talk about. So we have that freedom
on throwing shade to like be like, hey, maybe this
one thing happened and we can discuss it without it
being like a trend piece or it's not everybody. Yeah yeah, yeah,
well it did seem I mean, not that it was
(09:53):
that long ago. But it did seem like those segments
to even there was the term paper aspect, we're still
kind of ahead of its time in terms of anticipating
the kind of feminists and lgbt Q pop cultural analysis
that now runs the internet. I have to say, like
(10:14):
in it regarding that show, I think that that show
specifically was the best show on current TV and was
way ahead of its time, and it's I feel like
it's a real shame that it never truly found its
audience because I think now it could have cracked it
And like you said, it only ended three and a
half years ago. Um, but it see but all the
progress that's happens, it's two and two thousand eleven whatever
(10:37):
it was, and now is like it feels like twenty
years of past, Like people are just now catching onto
the fact this season that Amy Schumer might be a
little political and we're finally ready for that, you know,
And and it's it's a very different world than it
was even a couple of years ago. Well so, in
terms of talking about these issues and using them to
look at pop culture, did your interest in that start
(11:00):
with that show that you guys did, or which which
came first? I think for me, just speaking for me,
I was a writer on Infomania before that segment launched.
I was writing for the host Connor Knighton, and I
think I just was watching television and I think because
of that show I watched television. It'saw like I keep
(11:21):
bringing up the thing about the gay best right because
that was my first piece, or about no Helmo, which
was another piece I did. Because because of that show
that I started really noticing patterns and became very aware
of it. I think before I got that job, I
was also very My political fire got started with the
Proper campaign here in California. UM, and that's I think
when I really discovered how politically I where I was.
(11:41):
And I think that happened around the same time as
in Romania, and I think I just felt supercharged after
that to get into it. I don't know about you, though, Oh,
I did a very opposite trajectory. UM. I was like
a militant feminist in the wrong way in like the
early two thousand's. My friend gave me a copy of
Susan Flute's Backlash, and I would read it and get
(12:02):
really mad, but I kind of used it as a
tool to read on the elliptical machine at the gym
when I lived in Houston, so that guys wouldn't talk
to me. Um, And so I kind of had this
like I kind of was wearing feminism like an accessory
and not really fully like adopting the everything that it means.
So when I started at in Romania, I was taking
(12:23):
over for Sarah Haskins, who was doing an amazing job
doing target women and um, and I really had no
idea what I was doing. And on top of that,
I was still in that camp of women that's like, yeah,
sure I'm a liberal. Yeah sure I'm a feminist, but
maybe you shouldn't be dressed like that at night, and
(12:44):
maybe you shouldn't be um putting yourself in dangerous situations.
And I think I wasn't all the way aware of
what it meant to be like a supportive feminist, politically
active and empathetic woman and um looking at the patterns
and everything I saw on TV, and it kind of
opened my eyes to all this, you know, the reality
(13:05):
of the fact. And I think it actually helped me
to become like a way better person and I'm a
way cooler person. I will also say that, like we
both we both trained and come from the upright citizens
for day theater. So I think first our whole thing
has always been the comedy of it, and then just
our separate trajectories of how we also became political. Yeah,
and I think that's also something that like specifically the
(13:26):
comedy thing. Like I started doing comedy the minute I
left Texas. I was part of Second City in Chicago,
and then I moved to l A and started doing UCB.
I was adamant about being one of the guys, and
that kind of cloud in my vision a little bit
on what it meant to support other women because comedy
is so male and so um. You know, I grow
(13:48):
a little bit you kind of as a woman. I
don't think it's that. I don't think it's true. Now
we don't need to get in the long discussion about it,
but you definitely like you're like, I'm not gonna wear
a dress on stage. I'm gonna wear a T shirt,
I'm gonna wear sneakers. I'm going to fit in as
most much as possible because I don't want to stick
out as like necessarily quote unquote a woman or someone
with strong views about what it is to be a woman. Um,
(14:08):
so I think Infomania really gave me permission to do
comedy and be a strong feminist at the same time. Well,
along the same lines, I am curious to know whether
also being in the comedy world directly shaped any of
your political social activism and views rather than them kind
(14:33):
of uh, sort of being in separate spheres and then
just kind of coming together. If comedy itself and being
in that environment that maybe in the past but not
as much anymore, was very white, straight bro um had
any impact. Yeah, I knew. I think when I was
going through ucb UM and started getting really active. I
(14:53):
think I knew three other gay people in the whole program, uh,
And it really was through that thing. It was like
there was a show called three Dollar Bill and UCB
that was like midnight on like Saturday or maybe Sunday
night that would be sort of the gay comedy show.
And I remember getting involved in that and that's how
I met all of my friends there. And people were
(15:16):
doing political stuff like you know, like James Jonian or
you know, Drew DROGI those kinds of people, and that's
where I became like really involved in that. And I
think inherently for at least for me, one went with
the other. If you were a gay person in comedy,
there was something very already political about that. I think.
I think that's it's so it's so interesting to like
(15:39):
think about how women and um and women in comedy
versus being like having your gender, I mean, your your
sexuality kind of out in the open changes your experience
in that. Because I feel like there were I don't
even remember being like even being a thing of like, oh,
we should start an all female thing, you know. I
think the girl and I'm speaking for myself, we're so
(16:02):
afraid of doing something like that to make it seem
like I don't know, I just feel like it didn't happen.
There was one female sketch team that happened. Remember that
team for a little bit, but then they got to standard.
I don't know, it's just it's such a different thing.
I think. I think all of the comedy theaters in
general are just way less like that. Now. Yeah, I
(16:23):
would say, like at least going to us to be
in the groundings. It's a it's a much, I don't know.
It's a much more exciting atmosphere than it used to be,
and certainly more diverse and way bigger. Yeah, that's true. Well,
what would you think would account for that? Just more
attention to diversity or yeah, I think I think there
is way more attention to diversity. I feel like it's
(16:43):
only been in the last maybe two to three years
that the general population has finally decided that women are funny.
Maybe less, I don't know. I feel like it's been
very very recent, um, and it feels it's so funny
when people say that it's happening so fast, because it
does feel like it's happening so fast, But I mean
(17:04):
it didn't. It's taken a long time that people are
finally emerging. When you see shows like Amy Schumer Broad
City on a network like Comedy Central that would be
unthinkable a few years ago happened. And so I really
think it's just you know, I think I think so
many things. There's a lot of guys to who were
working behind the scenes, like Paul Feig, who's like, I
(17:25):
want to put women front and center, and I think
that they're funny. I think they can carry in all
female Ghostbusters. I mean, do you know how many like
of the ven diagram of everything that I would like
to happen in my life. How many the just a
female Ghostbusters hits? I and I think that it's just
about having like for for for the LGBT community and
(17:46):
and and ladies on the inside of Hollywood, like we
need allies. We need people who are unfortunately straight white
men who are gonna be like, no, it's wrong that
we have a cartoonish guy with the boa coming in
the room and being like we here, you know, like
heratical stuff. And then and then we'll finally, like Amy
Schumer and other people have done, they take control of
(18:08):
it themselves. But well, so, at what point did you
guys decide to shift a podcasting? Why why do a
podcast after your comedy? Because it was just the one
thing I think there was completely unfiltered that we got
to write our own rules. There was certainly no world
and wish you know, a woman in a gay man
we're gonna we're gonna make any waves on a television
show at that point. I mean, it was kind of
(18:30):
current and that was or or a web series. I
guess we could have done, but this was just so
I don't know. The podcast was so I mean, it
was so natural for us, so easy. We both love
talking NonStop. We both think the other is hilarious, and
you know, we're sort of like, let's do this. We
both like one up in each other's joke. I mean
(18:51):
we really do. I mean Brian and I I'll speak
for both of us. We love improv I mean we
we were you know, definitely facets at UCB and in
many different ways. And this is a performance for an
audience of each other, and if nothing else, it keeps
us fresh every week. Oh my god, So how do
(19:12):
you pick your shoes? Because it's gonna be hard sometimes
to just pick one. There's so many possible shoes. How
do you pick them? For me? I picked the one
that I think will be the funniest. Um. I don't.
I try to because it is first and foremost a
comedy podcast. I try not to pick something that I
don't think i'll be. I'll be ever to wrap my
(19:34):
that I'll be. You know that that won't be funny
at all, that I can't wrap my brain around. Well,
how am I going to make this awful story about
some horrible hate crime funny? Um? And so yeah, we
do go through a few, and you know a lot
of them are very depressing, but at the end of
the day, I really just want to find someone who's
doing something horrible and really tear them apart. That's really
(19:54):
make it more fun, especially if someone has has said
something really dumb that we can real Like. I remember
our most recent one was there's this woman who runs
go a marketing in Dallas and she wrote this kind
of anti woman uh Facebook rant about how why Hillary
can't be president and one of the phrases she used
(20:14):
was let the haters begin. Before she started her rant,
and I was I was like, I love this phrase
so much. And because I was like, this is the
dumbest thing everyone could have said, Let the haters, it
was like full blown my mom thinking that she got
it right. Yeah, and this woman has the nerve to
have pictures of herself in sandals and shorts on her
business website. I mean, she she's really doing it all, mom, Um,
(20:39):
you know, I mean there's so many The problem is
the problem and the gift is that there are so
many awful things happening to both of our groups, and
you know the overlap of that. Um, there are some
that like I never talked about the woman from UM,
I think, oh yeah, Columbia, who did the carry that
(21:01):
weight performance and non performances. We should carry the mattress
that she was sexually assaulted on around campus for many,
many months to graduational. You know, it's that like brand saying,
it's really hard for me to make that funny because
it's really serious and a real problem. So it's it's
it's really a fine line of like, we don't we
(21:22):
we do like taking the piss out of serious stuff,
but there's also a thing of like, we also don't
want to be disrespectful to people who have gone through
some terrible Do you ever hear from listeners who are
offended at how you present or talk about a shoe?
H It doesn't happen that often. Yeah, I would say,
(21:44):
like maybe once a month we'd probably get something like, oh,
I wish you wouldn't have said this about such and
such person. And the thing is is, like, I think
there's only been a couple of times where I even
felt that that person was even right. I mean, you know,
I don't think that we have ever tried to intentionally
(22:05):
hurt the wrong person or group, but yes we do.
There are people who are very I'm sure you guys
do too, don't you constantly get criticisms. Oh yeah, especially
with critiquing language and things like that. Let me tell
you something, I get man splay and every single thing
I say wrong either but it's on purpose I said
it wrong or on accident. Um. Brian actually corrected me
(22:29):
on the podcast this week that t Bows is alive
and it was left I who died and correct me
on the podcast, and someone tweeted me T bas is
still alive, and I was like, what what are you
doing with your time? If you had waited one more second. Also,
if I cared about which member of JLP was alive
(22:51):
or dead, I wouldn't be able to dedicate my time
because I actually care about Well, it's just the difference
between someone who for instance, as I was listening to
that episode, I thought, oh no, she's talking about left die.
But I would never tweet you that. You know. Oh
we get full on letters, by the way, me more
than Brian. I've talked about on the podcast. It's just
(23:12):
it's a hard line to do because we took to
because like we are very political, so we do we
do capture like a very left leaning liberal America and sometimes,
sorry to say, a small percentage of people don't have
a sense of humor. Oh, I feel you agree, I don't.
I think, honestly, I think watch dogs in any party
(23:33):
are the worst. And and whether it's you know you
watch dog or a female watch dog, straight white male
dude watch dog, they're the worst. But they love it sometimes.
I think, like when I get her like a corrective
email or something, I think like, I think Dick Cheney
would have thought, this is funny, but you're correcting me.
But I think Dick Cheney would laugh like the opposite.
(23:54):
Worst person. On the other side, someone actually tweeted me
yesterday to inform me that in our most recent podcast,
when I had meant to say the show Laguna Beach,
I said the o C instead, thank you, thank you
for the one. What that person is essentially doing is
(24:14):
going home, flipping open their laptop, connecting to WiFi, log
it in, and sending you that email. That's insane. Yeah.
We did get a letter that was pretty crazy not
too long ago. That it was incredibly long and it
was brating us for for something, and I thought, well, well,
certainly this person just got so mad that they had
to go home and bang out this email and just
(24:36):
send it. Except that the email had a PS, and
the PS said, after reviewing my email several times, I
still stand by everything I said. And so, God, you
have to really care that we are so wrong. You
have to care, you have to be honest with you.
I respect the crap out of that person, they said,
but I'm going to go ahead and side with them
on this one for at least proof reading it and
(24:58):
consider they stuff with their conviction. You know what, y'all,
Honestly this is these are a good problem to have
because if people weren't emotional and weren't invested, they wouldn't
do this stuff. And and that's that just means that
we're reaching people, even if it's about whatever. Someone had
the guts to PSU and double down on it. I
do just love I totally agree with you. God bless
(25:20):
them all. I do just love someone listening to Throwing
Shade or to your podcast and being indignified. It's like,
but the grammar was impeccable. I mean I can do that.
I appreciate that. Yeah, well, so you guys have such
a wonderful rapport, such a great rhythm. Are feminists and
(25:42):
homo sensuals natural allies or do you guys just have
something magical. Well, here's what Aaron and I have talked about.
I think that underneath it all the homophobia and sexism
and is really all just misogyny. It's people being afraid
of something feminine or something that they consider female. I
(26:02):
think that a lot of people who hate getty people
do it because they think there's something I don't know,
womanly about it, and so I think they are natural allies.
I think they also should be natural allies. And however,
I do like to also think that Aaron and I
do have a very specific special bond that you know
(26:23):
that really I don't think can be messed with. But honestly,
for two people who into the same kind of people,
we really never talk about. Have we ever talked about
sex once? I mean honestly, not likely, not in real words. No,
not like not like how I do with like my
friend Allison. No, not how I do with my mom. No,
(26:45):
just kidding, I don't talk to my mom about my
sex life. No, I think so. Yeah, I do think
that we have a very sort of specific, exciting bond
in that you know, um, I don't know. Honestly, it
feels like a sibling, you know, like, Yeah, we have
that kind of thing together where we love to rip
each other. We'd love to get the best of each other,
and we'd love to see the best of each other.
(27:07):
I think our parents are also very similar and like,
maybe not identical, but just we're both raising the South.
We both were raising like maybe not conservative conservative households,
but like conservative environments. There are things expected of us
in a in a Southern way that we've kind of
fought against. So there's a lot of, um, there's just
a lot of that kind of upbringing that we that
(27:30):
we share similar perspective. Nobody loves CASA like we do.
So Throwing Shade is ultimately a comedy podcast, obviously, but
you still tackle these serious issues and things that you
know aren't so comfortable to talk about all the time.
So what's your take on how humor can sometimes address
(27:52):
those kinds of things like homophobia, misogyny, inequality, etcetera more
effectively than the more academic think piece newsy style. I
just think it's easier to listen to. I think you're
much more willing to open your mind if you're actually listening. Um,
(28:13):
I I'm not saying all things pieces are bad, Certainly not,
but I don't know. After a few paragraphs of one,
sometimes you feel like you're getting yelled at. Sometimes you
feel like you're getting guilted into something as those are
nice things to feel, and I think, I don't know,
I feel like I feel like if you're laughing, you
are also inherently listening, and comedy is by nature inclusive,
(28:33):
like you need, you need the approval of an audience
to be too. So everyone's having a good time. And
I don't think think pieces necessarily have to take that
in consideration. Or some talking head on a news program,
they don't give a poop. If you're, if you if you're,
if you're like game, you know what I mean, You're
just a lot of people are just there to talk,
(28:54):
and we certainly are, but we also care about if
people are having a good time, right Like, I feel
like I've never got to think a piece that's like,
I'm just like you. I've never heard let's start like that.
And I think comedy is such an underdog thing that
I think, you know, it's easier to easier to absorb
that kind of thing than have a boulevard. That being said,
(29:17):
I do think there are sometimes comedians who don't who
do try to use comedy, but they still are a
little bit There is this weird sub niche if that's
even a word of like political comedians who like talking
over people's heads, who like being as far as person
in the room. And I think what works about Brian
and podcast specifically in the political realm is that we
(29:39):
will talk under you're really working with the lowest common denominator,
but about things that are pretty heavy. Oh maybe that's
why it's so appealing to me. Um. Well, so the phrase,
the actual phrase throwing shade, has been having quite a
pop cultural moment. It seems like just about even my mother,
(30:02):
I feel like it's using the term throwing shade. Um.
Have people ever taken issue with your use of it? Yeah,
I think, I mean it's happened. I think a couple
of times, if you mean, just like misappropriation and yeah, um, well,
should we tell people what it's the term comes from
the first time we heard it was from that documentary
Paris Is Burning? You know that? Okay, Yeah, so that
(30:26):
was the first and I think that was sort of
the intro of it to the world, was you know,
because I remember the big title card in that movie
that says Shade, and then Dorian Corey explaining what that means. Um,
And so I think we just took it from from
that and being obviously huge lovers of that movie, all
things queer and especially that movie, and and so that's
(30:47):
where we took it from. I don't think though, I
think we're actually using it pretty literally. So I think
people will take an issue with it. Have never listened
to the show for sure, Um, but but I would
buy and lunch. I think I remember like one time
or two times getting a tweet about that. Yeah, I
do think it's it's being used a lot and maybe
(31:07):
by the wrong people, but we are actually doing it.
So so what can we look forward to on Throwing Shade.
There's a word of a live tour. Yeah, our tour
will be on the site ready to go. We're doing
a huge seventeen city tour this year and it says
we're doing seventeen cities east coast, west coast, down the
(31:27):
middle of Texas, Canada and what is our third year
going on tour and um, we're really excited. We have
UM we're getting separate hotel rooms this year's were very
excited about about them with adjoining doors. Right, Oh, well
whatever movie that would be from vacation, Yeah, and we can.
(31:50):
Our deal is that hotels have to be next door,
and we have to enter the door at the same
time and leave the door at the same time that
they plant at the same time. It's hard to do
because their hotel doors, so one opens one way and
one that opens the other. It's very difficult. And then
also we have to put a glass up to the
wall so that we can talk to each other. I'm
picturing like total sleepover bathrobes. Hopefully it's a hotel. Yeah. Now,
(32:16):
do you all have any pre live show rituals? Aside
from opening the door at the same time, we each
have a vodka. I don't think I'm gonna have one
this year. I know we might not do that. We
kind of We certainly don't get drunk, but we'll have
one drink before the show. I got drunk last year
in Chicago after remember when someone said Aaron filled a
(32:36):
martini on my shoe and because I was so drunk,
I still after that was after the show. Aaron thought
that martinis were more than just alcohol. Legitimately, she thought
it was like a mixed drink. It's happened to the
best of us. She had like six martinis. I've never
seen her like this in my life, by the way,
and by the next day my I was like, Oh,
(32:58):
it's Chicago, I used to live here. I'll stay, I'll
check out of the hotel. Then I'll go around town
see all my old hats. And they don't go to
the airplane airport at six pm. Well after, I threw
up all day walking around Chicago, throwing up in different
parts that I used to just different buildings I used
to be. How's this for a sales pitch Throwing Shade
(33:20):
is a lot of sober fun performing exclusively in church basics.
If you can playing email us you know it is.
It's a fun show we do. We have pre show
which was we don't really we work out sometimes or
we'll go we sit in silence. Yeah, hey, here's the thing.
(33:45):
We stave it all for the state we do. Wait,
I was gonna say something about the show. We You
know a lot of people a lot of podcast when
they do live shows, it's seated. There's it's this thing
where they sit down at a table and and and
have like the mics seed it and is very like
almost like a like a book panel or like a
talk is like a full production show, like a two
(34:07):
person stand up. We're up, We're out in the audience,
were including everybody. It's it's not like we're sitting down
recording a show, not that there's anything wrong with that,
but ours is like full frantic. You get all of
our A D. D. You get all of our anxiety,
you get all of our neating name. If you've ever
seen singing in the rain, it's exactly like that. You're
just running up walls, exactly full umbrellas. Yes, can't wait.
(34:30):
Are you all coming through Atlanta by any chi? Yeah? Are?
Oh my god, well we're in Atlanta, so well having
as I think? Yeah, awesome And where can people go
to find out more about you? Listen to the podcast
and all that good stuff Twitters and Instagram on Twitter
and Instagram hind hat Brian Sapi, which is just my name,
and I'm at Gibbler tron g I V B l
(34:52):
R t R o in and then all of our
information is on throwing Shade dot com. Yeah, fantastic, amazing,
Thanks ladies, big fan of your podcast, thanks for having it,
Thank you so much, so thanks so much again to
Aaron and Brian of Throwing Shade. We loved talking with
(35:14):
these guys and we really hope that you enjoyed this
episode as well. So now let's hear from our listeners.
Do you guys also listen to Throwing Shade? Did anything
that we talked about strike and nerve? Or did you
even listen? Are you still there? Hello? Um? And again,
Brian and Aaron are on tour. Their live shows are hilarious.
(35:35):
They are part stand up, part podcasts, and you definitely
don't want to miss them because these two are comedy geniuses.
So head on over to Throwing Shade dot com to
not only learn more about Aaron and Brian in the podcast,
but also find out if they're coming to a city
near you. And, like Caroline said, we want to hear
from you as always. Mom Stuff at how stuff works
(35:57):
dot com is our email address. You can also tweet
up at mom Stuff podcasts or messages on Facebook, and
we've got a couple of messages to share with you
right now. Chris and I have received a bunch of
letters after our female Urination Device or stand to pe
(36:19):
device episode. Basically, you know our episode on on p funnels. Um,
and we've heard from a lot of you guys who
use these devices on your many adventures, and so we
want to read a couple of letters from folks who
have done all sorts of amazing things while packing a
p funnel with them. Okay, so this one is from Julie.
(36:41):
She says, so glad to hear you discussed the FUD.
I've told so many women about it, to a response
of polite silence. But really it is so empowering in
the best way. I hike kayak, guerrilla farm, commute in Atlanta,
and long distance travel on the train. I keep a
FUD in my purse, car and hydration backpack, each one
(37:02):
tucked in a soft sided, zippered pencil case. It fits
great in cargo pants or dress pants. Pockets that in
a silk undercover braw stash for some cash and a
credit card. So good to go, pun intended. The side
benefit is giving the man in your life a start,
and the ladies in the stalls next to you a
moment of pause. I like my peace style, but let
me know when the Hell of Ladies version comes out.
(37:24):
Too much fun And of course Julie is referring to
our mention of how we'd love to have a Sminty
branded Hey, ladies, p funnel, we can still do it.
We can still, dude, Like, we've gotten so many emails
about this, not even kidding. People are super excited about this.
I think at least four people would buy them, so
maybe half of those would buy gifts as well. We'd
(37:47):
get up to maybe eight. Yeah, there're any venture capitalists listening.
We've got twenty dollars to put in your pocket, that's right.
So I've got a letter here from Kirsty, also about
our FUD episode. She writes, I just finished your food
podcast hilarious and informative. As always, I work for a
u N agency and spend a lot of time in
(38:08):
the field interviewing and filming the stories of forceably displaced people,
and a FUD is standard in my equipment now, though
not always. About a year ago, I was at a
camp in the Democratic Republic of Congo, and many of
the refugee camps there aren't really any sanitary facilities. Safe
facilities for women who have been forced to flee is
(38:29):
about so much more than hygiene, also key to protecting
against risks of s g b V, but we've never
had enough funds, and family and staff live with less
than desirable facilities. Like you said, I'd become an expert
at drinking just the right amount of water to cope
in the heat and physically do my job without passing
out or needing to pee, and it's not healthy. This
(38:52):
particular trip, I spent three days with one family, and
on one day we walked about forty minutes outside of
the camp to a small stream and water hole where
the husband would do the family washing. I remember walking
out of the thicket of tall trees and my bladder
was assailed by the sound of tinkling water. I had
to pee. I held on while we finished filming that
particular segment. Then ran about ten minutes up the track
(39:15):
to the maze fields and I found a secluded spot
no fud, so I had to do the squad and
as I'm a nervous pier, it took a while to
get going paranoid about poisonous snakes, but more worried someone
would walk down the track. As I struggled to pee,
I moved back to the herby thickets behind me. Eventually
I finished did the shake. No toilet paper either pulled
(39:37):
up my trousers and headed off back to work. Hand
sanitiizer is an AID worker's best friend. When I finally
sat down in our vehicle to leave the camp that night,
I felt like I'd been whipped across the backs of
my upper thighs and bum a two and a half
hour painful car journey bouncing down non existent roads, and
I got back to our accommodation and realized I must
(39:58):
have brushed against some toxic or poisonous plant while peeing.
By that night, sitting was excruciating as it happened in
the congo, and with a slightly overactive imagination, I did
think maybe this was the beginning of the end. What
if I died from poisonous stings to my bottom? What
would they tell my loved ones or see at my funeral?
(40:19):
No heroics and that all from not being able to
pee standing up. The only colleague with me was my
male photographer, who was fortunately a trained medic. I was
in so much discomfort in the end that I showed
him and he provided any histamines which helped reduce the welts.
I was fine in a couple of weeks, but my
pride was tender a little longer. Since then, I've taken
(40:41):
a FUD on each trip and have tried a couple
of brands. Fresh At is the best for my kind
of work and comfort. As with everything, practice makes perfect.
But the trick is that you have to think carefully
about the underwear you choose when you might have to
use one. I find a G string or very stretchy
bikini pants are okay. Otherwise you still have to pull
your trousers and underwear down. As always being a woman,
(41:03):
there are so many things to coordinate for daily work
where so thanks Courtsy for sharing that story, and I
mean that really drives home the importance of these things existing.
They have so many practical applications, so keep sending your
stories because yeah, we want to hear about how you
pee too, sure mom. Stuff and how Stuff Works dot
(41:24):
com is our email address and for links to all
of our social media as well as all of our videos,
blogs and podcasts, including this one with links to learn
more about Aaron Brian and throwing Shade. Head on over
to stuff Mom Never Told You dot com for more
on this and thousands of other topics. Does it How
(41:46):
stuff Works dot com
Welcome to Stuff Mom Never Told You From how Supports
dot Com. Hello, and welcome to the podcast. I'm Kristen
and I'm Caroline, and listeners, we have a hilarious interview
for you today because we're talking to some improvisers slash
(00:24):
comedians slash podcast host Aaron Gibson and Brian Soffi. So,
Brian and Aaron both come from that great improvisation background.
They are comedy veterans who moved to Current TV, which kristin,
that's where you first saw Aaron, right, Yeah, So Aaron
Gibson hosted a segment on the Current TV show Infomania
(00:48):
called Modern Lady, and I saw it before Stuff Mom
Never Told You really got started, and she was doing
exactly the kind of stuff, only a lot funnier that
we do now on the podcast, taking these closer examinations
of how media represent and sell to women. And at
(01:10):
the time, she was, like you said, working with Brian Safie,
who was another host on Infomania, who did a segment
called That's Gay, and they took those a lot of
what they were doing in those two segments talking about
women and l g B t Q representation and now
transitioned it into this hilarious podcast Throwing Shade, and you
(01:34):
can also hear a lot of their UCB improv background
coming through on the podcast as well, because they just
have that quick, improvisational and comedic rapport. Yeah. I loved
hearing them talk about using their comedy, not only their
comedic background, but their comedy skills to talk about more
(01:55):
serious issues out there in the news. And speaking of
serious issues, caarly, we should probably give listeners a rundown
of how Throwing Shade works so that they'll understand why
we ask Brian and Aaron at one point in our
interview how they pick out their shoes. Yeah, we we
don't mean their footwear, although I am curious. Yeah, I
wish we had asked them about their footwear now. So
(02:17):
each week on Throwing Shade, they talk about two issues,
which say shortened two shoes because that just makes things
more fun. And Aaron picks a shoe focused on women,
Brian picks a shoe focused on lgbt Q stuff, and
they talk about it and they throw lots of shade
sometimes and they improvise and they make hilarious jokes and
(02:40):
it's fantastic and really fun to hear similar kinds of
things that we talk about on the podcast, but presented
in uh, shall we say a body or kind of way? Well, Kristen,
now that we've teased everyone with body conversation and body tease,
and oh well, let's just let the interview roll. Yeah, well, uh,
(03:05):
Brian and Aaron. For listeners who haven't heard throwing shade,
how would you two describe it? A descent into madness
but seeing in on math? Yeah, truly. What we do
is we each take a look. Aaron takes a look
at issues affecting women. I take a look at issues
affecting gay people, and we just treat those issues with
(03:27):
very little respect, go off into tangents about them, turn
them into ridiculous characters, and sort of make fun of
the people who are causing problems in this country. Perfect. Well,
so how would you guys describe each other? Though? Oh um, oh,
(03:47):
Brian's white. Yes, how we described I feel like we do.
I think we do a thing on the show where
we take take turns being straight man, uh don person,
and we kind of like balance that pretty flawed and flawlessly,
like we just we try. We like we both like
(04:08):
being a straight man. We both like being the clown,
so I feel like we've traded off that pretty well.
Brian's way more silly, You're sillier. You like nonsense, You're
more confident with nonsense. Thank you. I like being dirty, yes,
And I think like I think we like. I don't know.
What I think Aaron does so well is going from
(04:33):
taking a making a really super smart point and then
making a dumb one seamlessly um and can flip from
one to the next without hesitation, And I think so yeah.
I think what's interesting about our relationship is that there's not,
like Aaron said, there's not really a straight man in
this dynamic. We both love being silly, and we both
(04:55):
love being serious and wrong and wrong for the for
the reasons of just being funny. Yes, you know, we
defend we When we started the show, we started it
out of just a We had done another show where
we did similar pieces, but it was on a television network,
so we didn't have a lot of freedom. But one
of the reasons that we really wanted to start the
(05:15):
show so we could do exactly what we want on
the show. And I think what we want and what
we like is very similar. So that's kind of one
thing that I think makes our show. Um, that's why
why we're basically always on the same page. Well, that's
really interesting. UM, I was watching some Current TV, which
(05:36):
is the network you were talking about where you did
the segments Brian you hosted That's Gay and Erin you
hosted Modern Lady, And could you talk a little bit
then about um, just for listeners who might not be
aware of kind of the format of those and how
podcasting has maybe allowed you to take that even further. Yes.
(05:56):
So for for me, for That's Gay, it was really
just scouring every news station everything that talked about but
That's Gay essentially looked at how gay people and gayness
in general was perceived by the often clueless media. So
we would find a ton of clips to support our arguments,
like if I was talking about how gay characters in
(06:19):
commercials are sometimes very hidden, or if I was talking
about how the gay best friend is sort of become
this weird, horrible archetype in uh television and in movies,
we would have to find all the clips to support
those arguments. It was a pretty exhaustive research wise. And
then the points we would make because we each just
had segments that they would break out online. We're about
(06:40):
three minutes each. So we got to make a point.
But we had to do it very very quickly and
very very succinctly, and there really wasn't any time to
sort of go off into our own senses of humor
and and really like I don't know, sort of go
into the silly territory and really say everything we wanted
to say. It sort of had to be packaged very
succinctly and very nicely. I enjoyed that a lot, and
(07:02):
backed up by almost like an academic filter. Um, hence
all the research, Like here's here's my opinion, but I
also have to back it up with all these facts, right,
Like I can say gay people are often used, it's
just these magical best friends on television shows, but then
I have to find ten examples of it from television
shows to prove that point. So it was it was
(07:22):
very exhausted, but it was also it was a cool thing.
But this is just so much better to take a story,
really think about your opinion on it, and then just
go like full throttle, you know, pedal to the metal
on exactly what you think of it, and get filthy
with it, get crazy with it and just exhaust every
other part of it. We don't have a boss, and
(07:43):
we don't have a network. We we have no one
telling us what we can't do. Really, the only checks
and balances we have are people tweeting at us, going,
I didn't like that you said the word panty putting
this week, and then we can go, Okay, we're probably
going to say that again, but thanks for letting us know. Um,
some past wasn't vegan friendly enough, is it because of
(08:07):
the Sunday Chickens. Yes, it might be. And you know
a lot of people don't know this, but our show
in in Bomania and not nin Bomania, which is what
my aunt thinks it's called, or was called. UM which
was on Current TV, was started by Madeline Smithberg, who
also started The Daily Show, so we had a lot
(08:28):
of what we did had roots and how the Daily
Show also researchers or some if you notice, like when
John Stewart like makes his point, there's a lot of
media footage that backs it up. And so we were
kind of doing that in a very distilled way through
the scope of women's issues and gay issues, and UM
I thought I always felt a little bit shackled by
(08:48):
that because I didn't love the idea that we had
to I like having the knowledge and having the stuff
to back it up, but I don't necessarily like being like, well,
it's not your opinion unless it's happening seventeen time times,
because there's not always. There's not always. Sometimes you have
like your witch gut that you have to trust, like, oh,
I think this is a problem. Like, for example, I
did a whole segment on how every single woman on
(09:11):
detective shows on TV have been either a victim of
rape or or or or a child of rape, and um,
you know, there there's not a lot of female detectives
on TV, and most of them were either like had
some like sexual um trauma trauma in their past. Um.
(09:32):
But I mean, is it like an epidemic that's facing women,
like affecting women's lives. No, But I think it's an
important thing to talk about. So we have that freedom
on throwing shade to like be like, hey, maybe this
one thing happened and we can discuss it without it
being like a trend piece or it's not everybody. Yeah yeah, yeah,
well it did seem I mean, not that it was
(09:53):
that long ago. But it did seem like those segments
to even there was the term paper aspect, we're still
kind of ahead of its time in terms of anticipating
the kind of feminists and lgbt Q pop cultural analysis
that now runs the internet. I have to say, like
(10:14):
in it regarding that show, I think that that show
specifically was the best show on current TV and was
way ahead of its time, and it's I feel like
it's a real shame that it never truly found its
audience because I think now it could have cracked it
And like you said, it only ended three and a
half years ago. Um, but it see but all the
progress that's happens, it's two and two thousand eleven whatever
(10:37):
it was, and now is like it feels like twenty
years of past, Like people are just now catching onto
the fact this season that Amy Schumer might be a
little political and we're finally ready for that, you know,
And and it's it's a very different world than it
was even a couple of years ago. Well so, in
terms of talking about these issues and using them to
look at pop culture, did your interest in that start
(11:00):
with that show that you guys did, or which which
came first? I think for me, just speaking for me,
I was a writer on Infomania before that segment launched.
I was writing for the host Connor Knighton, and I
think I just was watching television and I think because
of that show I watched television. It'saw like I keep
(11:21):
bringing up the thing about the gay best right because
that was my first piece, or about no Helmo, which
was another piece I did. Because because of that show
that I started really noticing patterns and became very aware
of it. I think before I got that job, I
was also very My political fire got started with the
Proper campaign here in California. UM, and that's I think
when I really discovered how politically I where I was.
(11:41):
And I think that happened around the same time as
in Romania, and I think I just felt supercharged after
that to get into it. I don't know about you, though, Oh,
I did a very opposite trajectory. UM. I was like
a militant feminist in the wrong way in like the
early two thousand's. My friend gave me a copy of
Susan Flute's Backlash, and I would read it and get
(12:02):
really mad, but I kind of used it as a
tool to read on the elliptical machine at the gym
when I lived in Houston, so that guys wouldn't talk
to me. Um, And so I kind of had this
like I kind of was wearing feminism like an accessory
and not really fully like adopting the everything that it means.
So when I started at in Romania, I was taking
(12:23):
over for Sarah Haskins, who was doing an amazing job
doing target women and um, and I really had no
idea what I was doing. And on top of that,
I was still in that camp of women that's like, yeah,
sure I'm a liberal. Yeah sure I'm a feminist, but
maybe you shouldn't be dressed like that at night, and
(12:44):
maybe you shouldn't be um putting yourself in dangerous situations.
And I think I wasn't all the way aware of
what it meant to be like a supportive feminist, politically
active and empathetic woman and um looking at the patterns
and everything I saw on TV, and it kind of
opened my eyes to all this, you know, the reality
(13:05):
of the fact. And I think it actually helped me
to become like a way better person and I'm a
way cooler person. I will also say that, like we
both we both trained and come from the upright citizens
for day theater. So I think first our whole thing
has always been the comedy of it, and then just
our separate trajectories of how we also became political. Yeah,
and I think that's also something that like specifically the
(13:26):
comedy thing. Like I started doing comedy the minute I
left Texas. I was part of Second City in Chicago,
and then I moved to l A and started doing UCB.
I was adamant about being one of the guys, and
that kind of cloud in my vision a little bit
on what it meant to support other women because comedy
is so male and so um. You know, I grow
(13:48):
a little bit you kind of as a woman. I
don't think it's that. I don't think it's true. Now
we don't need to get in the long discussion about it,
but you definitely like you're like, I'm not gonna wear
a dress on stage. I'm gonna wear a T shirt,
I'm gonna wear sneakers. I'm going to fit in as
most much as possible because I don't want to stick
out as like necessarily quote unquote a woman or someone
with strong views about what it is to be a woman. Um,
(14:08):
so I think Infomania really gave me permission to do
comedy and be a strong feminist at the same time. Well,
along the same lines, I am curious to know whether
also being in the comedy world directly shaped any of
your political social activism and views rather than them kind
(14:33):
of uh, sort of being in separate spheres and then
just kind of coming together. If comedy itself and being
in that environment that maybe in the past but not
as much anymore, was very white, straight bro um had
any impact. Yeah, I knew. I think when I was
going through ucb UM and started getting really active. I
(14:53):
think I knew three other gay people in the whole program, uh,
And it really was through that thing. It was like
there was a show called three Dollar Bill and UCB
that was like midnight on like Saturday or maybe Sunday
night that would be sort of the gay comedy show.
And I remember getting involved in that and that's how
I met all of my friends there. And people were
(15:16):
doing political stuff like you know, like James Jonian or
you know, Drew DROGI those kinds of people, and that's
where I became like really involved in that. And I
think inherently for at least for me, one went with
the other. If you were a gay person in comedy,
there was something very already political about that. I think.
I think that's it's so it's so interesting to like
(15:39):
think about how women and um and women in comedy
versus being like having your gender, I mean, your your
sexuality kind of out in the open changes your experience
in that. Because I feel like there were I don't
even remember being like even being a thing of like, oh,
we should start an all female thing, you know. I
think the girl and I'm speaking for myself, we're so
(16:02):
afraid of doing something like that to make it seem
like I don't know, I just feel like it didn't happen.
There was one female sketch team that happened. Remember that
team for a little bit, but then they got to standard.
I don't know, it's just it's such a different thing.
I think. I think all of the comedy theaters in
general are just way less like that. Now. Yeah, I
(16:23):
would say, like at least going to us to be
in the groundings. It's a it's a much, I don't know.
It's a much more exciting atmosphere than it used to be,
and certainly more diverse and way bigger. Yeah, that's true. Well,
what would you think would account for that? Just more
attention to diversity or yeah, I think I think there
is way more attention to diversity. I feel like it's
(16:43):
only been in the last maybe two to three years
that the general population has finally decided that women are funny.
Maybe less, I don't know. I feel like it's been
very very recent, um, and it feels it's so funny
when people say that it's happening so fast, because it
does feel like it's happening so fast, But I mean
(17:04):
it didn't. It's taken a long time that people are
finally emerging. When you see shows like Amy Schumer Broad
City on a network like Comedy Central that would be
unthinkable a few years ago happened. And so I really
think it's just you know, I think I think so
many things. There's a lot of guys to who were
working behind the scenes, like Paul Feig, who's like, I
(17:25):
want to put women front and center, and I think
that they're funny. I think they can carry in all
female Ghostbusters. I mean, do you know how many like
of the ven diagram of everything that I would like
to happen in my life. How many the just a
female Ghostbusters hits? I and I think that it's just
about having like for for for the LGBT community and
(17:46):
and and ladies on the inside of Hollywood, like we
need allies. We need people who are unfortunately straight white
men who are gonna be like, no, it's wrong that
we have a cartoonish guy with the boa coming in
the room and being like we here, you know, like
heratical stuff. And then and then we'll finally, like Amy
Schumer and other people have done, they take control of
(18:08):
it themselves. But well, so, at what point did you
guys decide to shift a podcasting? Why why do a
podcast after your comedy? Because it was just the one
thing I think there was completely unfiltered that we got
to write our own rules. There was certainly no world
and wish you know, a woman in a gay man
we're gonna we're gonna make any waves on a television
show at that point. I mean, it was kind of
(18:30):
current and that was or or a web series. I
guess we could have done, but this was just so
I don't know. The podcast was so I mean, it
was so natural for us, so easy. We both love
talking NonStop. We both think the other is hilarious, and
you know, we're sort of like, let's do this. We
both like one up in each other's joke. I mean
(18:51):
we really do. I mean Brian and I I'll speak
for both of us. We love improv I mean we
we were you know, definitely facets at UCB and in
many different ways. And this is a performance for an
audience of each other, and if nothing else, it keeps
us fresh every week. Oh my god, So how do
(19:12):
you pick your shoes? Because it's gonna be hard sometimes
to just pick one. There's so many possible shoes. How
do you pick them? For me? I picked the one
that I think will be the funniest. Um. I don't.
I try to because it is first and foremost a
comedy podcast. I try not to pick something that I
don't think i'll be. I'll be ever to wrap my
(19:34):
that I'll be. You know that that won't be funny
at all, that I can't wrap my brain around. Well,
how am I going to make this awful story about
some horrible hate crime funny? Um? And so yeah, we
do go through a few, and you know a lot
of them are very depressing, but at the end of
the day, I really just want to find someone who's
doing something horrible and really tear them apart. That's really
(19:54):
make it more fun, especially if someone has has said
something really dumb that we can real Like. I remember
our most recent one was there's this woman who runs
go a marketing in Dallas and she wrote this kind
of anti woman uh Facebook rant about how why Hillary
can't be president and one of the phrases she used
(20:14):
was let the haters begin. Before she started her rant,
and I was I was like, I love this phrase
so much. And because I was like, this is the
dumbest thing everyone could have said, Let the haters, it
was like full blown my mom thinking that she got
it right. Yeah, and this woman has the nerve to
have pictures of herself in sandals and shorts on her
business website. I mean, she she's really doing it all, mom, Um,
(20:39):
you know, I mean there's so many The problem is
the problem and the gift is that there are so
many awful things happening to both of our groups, and
you know the overlap of that. Um, there are some
that like I never talked about the woman from UM,
I think, oh yeah, Columbia, who did the carry that
(21:01):
weight performance and non performances. We should carry the mattress
that she was sexually assaulted on around campus for many,
many months to graduational. You know, it's that like brand saying,
it's really hard for me to make that funny because
it's really serious and a real problem. So it's it's
it's really a fine line of like, we don't we
(21:22):
we do like taking the piss out of serious stuff,
but there's also a thing of like, we also don't
want to be disrespectful to people who have gone through
some terrible Do you ever hear from listeners who are
offended at how you present or talk about a shoe?
H It doesn't happen that often. Yeah, I would say,
(21:44):
like maybe once a month we'd probably get something like, oh,
I wish you wouldn't have said this about such and
such person. And the thing is is, like, I think
there's only been a couple of times where I even
felt that that person was even right. I mean, you know,
I don't think that we have ever tried to intentionally
(22:05):
hurt the wrong person or group, but yes we do.
There are people who are very I'm sure you guys
do too, don't you constantly get criticisms. Oh yeah, especially
with critiquing language and things like that. Let me tell
you something, I get man splay and every single thing
I say wrong either but it's on purpose I said
it wrong or on accident. Um. Brian actually corrected me
(22:29):
on the podcast this week that t Bows is alive
and it was left I who died and correct me
on the podcast, and someone tweeted me T bas is
still alive, and I was like, what what are you
doing with your time? If you had waited one more second. Also,
if I cared about which member of JLP was alive
(22:51):
or dead, I wouldn't be able to dedicate my time
because I actually care about Well, it's just the difference
between someone who for instance, as I was listening to
that episode, I thought, oh no, she's talking about left die.
But I would never tweet you that. You know. Oh
we get full on letters, by the way, me more
than Brian. I've talked about on the podcast. It's just
(23:12):
it's a hard line to do because we took to
because like we are very political, so we do we
do capture like a very left leaning liberal America and sometimes,
sorry to say, a small percentage of people don't have
a sense of humor. Oh, I feel you agree, I don't.
I think, honestly, I think watch dogs in any party
(23:33):
are the worst. And and whether it's you know you
watch dog or a female watch dog, straight white male
dude watch dog, they're the worst. But they love it sometimes.
I think, like when I get her like a corrective
email or something, I think like, I think Dick Cheney
would have thought, this is funny, but you're correcting me.
But I think Dick Cheney would laugh like the opposite.
(23:54):
Worst person. On the other side, someone actually tweeted me
yesterday to inform me that in our most recent podcast,
when I had meant to say the show Laguna Beach,
I said the o C instead, thank you, thank you
for the one. What that person is essentially doing is
(24:14):
going home, flipping open their laptop, connecting to WiFi, log
it in, and sending you that email. That's insane. Yeah.
We did get a letter that was pretty crazy not
too long ago. That it was incredibly long and it
was brating us for for something, and I thought, well, well,
certainly this person just got so mad that they had
to go home and bang out this email and just
(24:36):
send it. Except that the email had a PS, and
the PS said, after reviewing my email several times, I
still stand by everything I said. And so, God, you
have to really care that we are so wrong. You
have to care, you have to be honest with you.
I respect the crap out of that person, they said,
but I'm going to go ahead and side with them
on this one for at least proof reading it and
(24:58):
consider they stuff with their conviction. You know what, y'all,
Honestly this is these are a good problem to have
because if people weren't emotional and weren't invested, they wouldn't
do this stuff. And and that's that just means that
we're reaching people, even if it's about whatever. Someone had
the guts to PSU and double down on it. I
do just love I totally agree with you. God bless
(25:20):
them all. I do just love someone listening to Throwing
Shade or to your podcast and being indignified. It's like,
but the grammar was impeccable. I mean I can do that.
I appreciate that. Yeah, well, so you guys have such
a wonderful rapport, such a great rhythm. Are feminists and
(25:42):
homo sensuals natural allies or do you guys just have
something magical. Well, here's what Aaron and I have talked about.
I think that underneath it all the homophobia and sexism
and is really all just misogyny. It's people being afraid
of something feminine or something that they consider female. I
(26:02):
think that a lot of people who hate getty people
do it because they think there's something I don't know,
womanly about it, and so I think they are natural allies.
I think they also should be natural allies. And however,
I do like to also think that Aaron and I
do have a very specific special bond that you know
(26:23):
that really I don't think can be messed with. But honestly,
for two people who into the same kind of people,
we really never talk about. Have we ever talked about
sex once? I mean honestly, not likely, not in real words. No,
not like not like how I do with like my
friend Allison. No, not how I do with my mom. No,
(26:45):
just kidding, I don't talk to my mom about my
sex life. No, I think so. Yeah, I do think
that we have a very sort of specific, exciting bond
in that you know, um, I don't know. Honestly, it
feels like a sibling, you know, like, Yeah, we have
that kind of thing together where we love to rip
each other. We'd love to get the best of each other,
and we'd love to see the best of each other.
(27:07):
I think our parents are also very similar and like,
maybe not identical, but just we're both raising the South.
We both were raising like maybe not conservative conservative households,
but like conservative environments. There are things expected of us
in a in a Southern way that we've kind of
fought against. So there's a lot of, um, there's just
a lot of that kind of upbringing that we that
(27:30):
we share similar perspective. Nobody loves CASA like we do.
So Throwing Shade is ultimately a comedy podcast, obviously, but
you still tackle these serious issues and things that you
know aren't so comfortable to talk about all the time.
So what's your take on how humor can sometimes address
(27:52):
those kinds of things like homophobia, misogyny, inequality, etcetera more
effectively than the more academic think piece newsy style. I
just think it's easier to listen to. I think you're
much more willing to open your mind if you're actually listening. Um,
(28:13):
I I'm not saying all things pieces are bad, Certainly not,
but I don't know. After a few paragraphs of one,
sometimes you feel like you're getting yelled at. Sometimes you
feel like you're getting guilted into something as those are
nice things to feel, and I think, I don't know,
I feel like I feel like if you're laughing, you
are also inherently listening, and comedy is by nature inclusive,
(28:33):
like you need, you need the approval of an audience
to be too. So everyone's having a good time. And
I don't think think pieces necessarily have to take that
in consideration. Or some talking head on a news program,
they don't give a poop. If you're, if you if you're,
if you're like game, you know what I mean, You're
just a lot of people are just there to talk,
(28:54):
and we certainly are, but we also care about if
people are having a good time, right Like, I feel
like I've never got to think a piece that's like,
I'm just like you. I've never heard let's start like that.
And I think comedy is such an underdog thing that
I think, you know, it's easier to easier to absorb
that kind of thing than have a boulevard. That being said,
(29:17):
I do think there are sometimes comedians who don't who
do try to use comedy, but they still are a
little bit There is this weird sub niche if that's
even a word of like political comedians who like talking
over people's heads, who like being as far as person
in the room. And I think what works about Brian
and podcast specifically in the political realm is that we
(29:39):
will talk under you're really working with the lowest common denominator,
but about things that are pretty heavy. Oh maybe that's
why it's so appealing to me. Um. Well, so the phrase,
the actual phrase throwing shade, has been having quite a
pop cultural moment. It seems like just about even my mother,
(30:02):
I feel like it's using the term throwing shade. Um.
Have people ever taken issue with your use of it? Yeah,
I think, I mean it's happened. I think a couple
of times, if you mean, just like misappropriation and yeah, um, well,
should we tell people what it's the term comes from
the first time we heard it was from that documentary
Paris Is Burning? You know that? Okay, Yeah, so that
(30:26):
was the first and I think that was sort of
the intro of it to the world, was you know,
because I remember the big title card in that movie
that says Shade, and then Dorian Corey explaining what that means. Um,
And so I think we just took it from from
that and being obviously huge lovers of that movie, all
things queer and especially that movie, and and so that's
(30:47):
where we took it from. I don't think though, I
think we're actually using it pretty literally. So I think
people will take an issue with it. Have never listened
to the show for sure, Um, but but I would
buy and lunch. I think I remember like one time
or two times getting a tweet about that. Yeah, I
do think it's it's being used a lot and maybe
(31:07):
by the wrong people, but we are actually doing it.
So so what can we look forward to on Throwing Shade.
There's a word of a live tour. Yeah, our tour
will be on the site ready to go. We're doing
a huge seventeen city tour this year and it says
we're doing seventeen cities east coast, west coast, down the
(31:27):
middle of Texas, Canada and what is our third year
going on tour and um, we're really excited. We have
UM we're getting separate hotel rooms this year's were very
excited about about them with adjoining doors. Right, Oh, well
whatever movie that would be from vacation, Yeah, and we can.
(31:50):
Our deal is that hotels have to be next door,
and we have to enter the door at the same
time and leave the door at the same time that
they plant at the same time. It's hard to do
because their hotel doors, so one opens one way and
one that opens the other. It's very difficult. And then
also we have to put a glass up to the
wall so that we can talk to each other. I'm
picturing like total sleepover bathrobes. Hopefully it's a hotel. Yeah. Now,
(32:16):
do you all have any pre live show rituals? Aside
from opening the door at the same time, we each
have a vodka. I don't think I'm gonna have one
this year. I know we might not do that. We
kind of We certainly don't get drunk, but we'll have
one drink before the show. I got drunk last year
in Chicago after remember when someone said Aaron filled a
(32:36):
martini on my shoe and because I was so drunk,
I still after that was after the show. Aaron thought
that martinis were more than just alcohol. Legitimately, she thought
it was like a mixed drink. It's happened to the
best of us. She had like six martinis. I've never
seen her like this in my life, by the way,
and by the next day my I was like, Oh,
(32:58):
it's Chicago, I used to live here. I'll stay, I'll
check out of the hotel. Then I'll go around town
see all my old hats. And they don't go to
the airplane airport at six pm. Well after, I threw
up all day walking around Chicago, throwing up in different
parts that I used to just different buildings I used
to be. How's this for a sales pitch Throwing Shade
(33:20):
is a lot of sober fun performing exclusively in church basics.
If you can playing email us you know it is.
It's a fun show we do. We have pre show
which was we don't really we work out sometimes or
we'll go we sit in silence. Yeah, hey, here's the thing.
(33:45):
We stave it all for the state we do. Wait,
I was gonna say something about the show. We You
know a lot of people a lot of podcast when
they do live shows, it's seated. There's it's this thing
where they sit down at a table and and and
have like the mics seed it and is very like
almost like a like a book panel or like a
talk is like a full production show, like a two
(34:07):
person stand up. We're up, We're out in the audience,
were including everybody. It's it's not like we're sitting down
recording a show, not that there's anything wrong with that,
but ours is like full frantic. You get all of
our A D. D. You get all of our anxiety,
you get all of our neating name. If you've ever
seen singing in the rain, it's exactly like that. You're
just running up walls, exactly full umbrellas. Yes, can't wait.
(34:30):
Are you all coming through Atlanta by any chi? Yeah? Are?
Oh my god, well we're in Atlanta, so well having
as I think? Yeah, awesome And where can people go
to find out more about you? Listen to the podcast
and all that good stuff Twitters and Instagram on Twitter
and Instagram hind hat Brian Sapi, which is just my name,
and I'm at Gibbler tron g I V B l
(34:52):
R t R o in and then all of our
information is on throwing Shade dot com. Yeah, fantastic, amazing,
Thanks ladies, big fan of your podcast, thanks for having it,
Thank you so much, so thanks so much again to
Aaron and Brian of Throwing Shade. We loved talking with
(35:14):
these guys and we really hope that you enjoyed this
episode as well. So now let's hear from our listeners.
Do you guys also listen to Throwing Shade? Did anything
that we talked about strike and nerve? Or did you
even listen? Are you still there? Hello? Um? And again,
Brian and Aaron are on tour. Their live shows are hilarious.
(35:35):
They are part stand up, part podcasts, and you definitely
don't want to miss them because these two are comedy geniuses.
So head on over to Throwing Shade dot com to
not only learn more about Aaron and Brian in the podcast,
but also find out if they're coming to a city
near you. And, like Caroline said, we want to hear
from you as always. Mom Stuff at how stuff works
(35:57):
dot com is our email address. You can also tweet
up at mom Stuff podcasts or messages on Facebook, and
we've got a couple of messages to share with you
right now. Chris and I have received a bunch of
letters after our female Urination Device or stand to pe
(36:19):
device episode. Basically, you know our episode on on p funnels. Um,
and we've heard from a lot of you guys who
use these devices on your many adventures, and so we
want to read a couple of letters from folks who
have done all sorts of amazing things while packing a
p funnel with them. Okay, so this one is from Julie.
(36:41):
She says, so glad to hear you discussed the FUD.
I've told so many women about it, to a response
of polite silence. But really it is so empowering in
the best way. I hike kayak, guerrilla farm, commute in Atlanta,
and long distance travel on the train. I keep a
FUD in my purse, car and hydration backpack, each one
(37:02):
tucked in a soft sided, zippered pencil case. It fits
great in cargo pants or dress pants. Pockets that in
a silk undercover braw stash for some cash and a
credit card. So good to go, pun intended. The side
benefit is giving the man in your life a start,
and the ladies in the stalls next to you a
moment of pause. I like my peace style, but let
me know when the Hell of Ladies version comes out.
(37:24):
Too much fun And of course Julie is referring to
our mention of how we'd love to have a Sminty
branded Hey, ladies, p funnel, we can still do it.
We can still, dude, Like, we've gotten so many emails
about this, not even kidding. People are super excited about this.
I think at least four people would buy them, so
maybe half of those would buy gifts as well. We'd
(37:47):
get up to maybe eight. Yeah, there're any venture capitalists listening.
We've got twenty dollars to put in your pocket, that's right.
So I've got a letter here from Kirsty, also about
our FUD episode. She writes, I just finished your food
podcast hilarious and informative. As always, I work for a
u N agency and spend a lot of time in
(38:08):
the field interviewing and filming the stories of forceably displaced people,
and a FUD is standard in my equipment now, though
not always. About a year ago, I was at a
camp in the Democratic Republic of Congo, and many of
the refugee camps there aren't really any sanitary facilities. Safe
facilities for women who have been forced to flee is
(38:29):
about so much more than hygiene, also key to protecting
against risks of s g b V, but we've never
had enough funds, and family and staff live with less
than desirable facilities. Like you said, I'd become an expert
at drinking just the right amount of water to cope
in the heat and physically do my job without passing
out or needing to pee, and it's not healthy. This
(38:52):
particular trip, I spent three days with one family, and
on one day we walked about forty minutes outside of
the camp to a small stream and water hole where
the husband would do the family washing. I remember walking
out of the thicket of tall trees and my bladder
was assailed by the sound of tinkling water. I had
to pee. I held on while we finished filming that
particular segment. Then ran about ten minutes up the track
(39:15):
to the maze fields and I found a secluded spot
no fud, so I had to do the squad and
as I'm a nervous pier, it took a while to
get going paranoid about poisonous snakes, but more worried someone
would walk down the track. As I struggled to pee,
I moved back to the herby thickets behind me. Eventually
I finished did the shake. No toilet paper either pulled
(39:37):
up my trousers and headed off back to work. Hand
sanitiizer is an AID worker's best friend. When I finally
sat down in our vehicle to leave the camp that night,
I felt like I'd been whipped across the backs of
my upper thighs and bum a two and a half
hour painful car journey bouncing down non existent roads, and
I got back to our accommodation and realized I must
(39:58):
have brushed against some toxic or poisonous plant while peeing.
By that night, sitting was excruciating as it happened in
the congo, and with a slightly overactive imagination, I did
think maybe this was the beginning of the end. What
if I died from poisonous stings to my bottom? What
would they tell my loved ones or see at my funeral?
(40:19):
No heroics and that all from not being able to
pee standing up. The only colleague with me was my
male photographer, who was fortunately a trained medic. I was
in so much discomfort in the end that I showed
him and he provided any histamines which helped reduce the welts.
I was fine in a couple of weeks, but my
pride was tender a little longer. Since then, I've taken
(40:41):
a FUD on each trip and have tried a couple
of brands. Fresh At is the best for my kind
of work and comfort. As with everything, practice makes perfect.
But the trick is that you have to think carefully
about the underwear you choose when you might have to
use one. I find a G string or very stretchy
bikini pants are okay. Otherwise you still have to pull
your trousers and underwear down. As always being a woman,
(41:03):
there are so many things to coordinate for daily work
where so thanks Courtsy for sharing that story, and I
mean that really drives home the importance of these things existing.
They have so many practical applications, so keep sending your
stories because yeah, we want to hear about how you
pee too, sure mom. Stuff and how Stuff Works dot
(41:24):
com is our email address and for links to all
of our social media as well as all of our videos,
blogs and podcasts, including this one with links to learn
more about Aaron Brian and throwing Shade. Head on over
to stuff Mom Never Told You dot com for more
on this and thousands of other topics. Does it How
(41:46):
stuff Works dot com
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