Welcome To The Suburbs

From stuffed chicken thighs and cereal-for-dinner debates to Broad Ripple driveways, short-term rental surprises, and HVAC scams — Andy and Greg are back with another laugh-out-loud episode of Welcome to the Suburbs.

In Episode 69, the guys swap stories about managing rentals, neighbor drama, “quick response” QR code revelations, and even how to choose the perfect stripper name. You’ll hear about unexpected guest check-ins, a DIY gr...

Andy and Greg kick off Season 3, Episode 68 with a chilling dive into the Fox Hollow murders—creepy mannequins, strange obsessions, and suburban horror. From there, things take flight (literally) with owl stories, tree-climbing misadventures, and cliffside panic at Havasupai Falls. Add in some neighborhood oddities, HOA hilarity, and family stories that blur the line between truth and tall tale, and you’ve got another ride through ...

In Season 3, Episode 67 of Welcome to the Suburbs, Andy and Greg wade into the deep end of summer with a mix of the bizarre, the spooky, and the hilariously mundane. From a comedy club condo with a bathtub full of spaghetti to neighborhood ghost sightings, no story is too strange. 

They unravel the tale of a mysteriously locked door, a little girl apparition, and even a ghostly grandma. The guys also tackle the pressing issue of mis...

Andy and Greg are back with another late-night ramble through suburban life—this time tackling everything from questionable sleep aids to nostalgic rock trivia.

Greg recounts his epic sleep study fail, his reluctant romance with a CPAP machine, and the insurance company’s passive-aggressive text reminders. 

Andy dives into the hilariously sketchy marketing of the “Pillow Mate” speaker—ideal for listening to cricket matches (because, ...

Greg and Andy return with a laugh-filled episode that proves no topic is too small—or too outdated—for the suburbs. 

From banks that don’t carry cash to fax machines that cost $6, the guys dig into the absurdities of modern (and not-so-modern) life. 

Greg shares a “Tiny Town” update about his sister’s attempt to subdivide a lake house master bedroom, leading to a hilarious comparison to Spinal Tap’s Stonehenge debacle. 

Along the way,...

It’s officially summertime, and Andy and Greg are back with another episode of Welcome to the Suburbs—where laughter comes with legal disclaimers. Greg breaks the news about Ripple Avenue Suites’ shady former tenants (spoiler: the Asian Flower Spa lives on… in spirit and search results). And no, it wasn’t about massage—unless you were interested in a “happy ending.”

From sweepstakes winnings to glitter drywall, mouse drama at the la...

What do a fourth-grade ceramic mug, Fifth Third Bank’s ridiculous math, and a suspicious $9.82 million inheritance letter have in common? Absolutely everything in this week’s episode of Welcome to the Suburbs.

Andy reads a letter from a “legal practitioner” offering him millions from a mysterious overseas relative. Greg makes a banker cry. Together they explore the emotional baggage of sentimental keepsakes, estate planning gone sid...

Greg bought another house… maybe. In this episode, Andy and Greg dive into the potential of a second Airbnb property—a rundown rental filled with broken vacuums, creepy tenants, and enough duct tape to make MacGyver proud. But is it a gold mine or a future episode of Hoarders?

Also on the docket:

• A chemical peel gone wrong

• A building inspector with stogie-and-thermos energy

• Bagging etiquette at Walmart

• And Greg’s night at the sl...

In this episode, Andy and Greg dive beard-first into a tangle of hilarious and heartfelt tales—from a mysterious missing painting and a very questionable uncle, to mustache-clad IndyCar superfans and sketchy roadside motels. There’s also a dog who finally learns to eat on his own (after four years), a fish funeral that rivals ancient civilizations, and a bizarre addiction to Vicks inhalers. Whether it’s the Mustache Club, awkward h...

Andy and Greg head back to school… art school, that is. In this episode, Greg shares his wild ride through metal sculpting, finger-welding, and an intro-to-oil-painting class taught by a barely-awake instructor. From making a fish out of scrap metal to navigating toxic paints and art-class chaos, they cover it all—with plenty of laughs (and a few bandages) along the way. Grab your smock (or your mom’s blouse) and join us for anothe...

After 35 years of marriage, Greg has finally learned that guessing gifts before unwrapping them is not a love language. Even when he means well, his psychic present-sleuthing sucks the joy out of the moment. To help, he’s turned to acting classes—because pretending to be surprised is apparently a skill.

Elsewhere in suburbia:

– Greg’s double-shot vaccine appointment turns into a tequila-scented CVS horror show.

– Jennifer pays the HOA...

When Greg’s dad was alive, he was an endless source of rants. Checking in with him was like uncorking a genie of angst—30 minutes of pure frustration directed at everything from junk mail to the cost of mulch to the absurd volume of acorns. In this episode of Welcome to the Suburbs, we start with one of his classic rants—this time about Hulu.

Meanwhile, Andy shares the one minor detail he forgot before his wedding: getting legally d...

Greg and Andy are back in the studio for Episode 57, and things are already off the rails.

Greg and Keely are on Day 3 of a six-day grandparent experiment, babysitting their three-year-old granddaughter—and let’s just say it’s not going smoothly for Greg.

Greg, in an effort to be the fun grandpa, has reduced his granddaughter to tears multiple times—all thanks to a toy cell phone and a deep commitment to realism. He’d pretend to answ...

Here’s a shocker: The wife of a Wisconsin kayaker who faked his own drowning to abandon his family and run off to Eastern Europe is now filing for divorce. Didn’t see that coming, did you? Episode 56 of Welcome to the Suburbs takes a deep dive into Ryan Borgwardt’s ridiculous escape attempt, how authorities tracked him down, and why guys like this make our job easy.

If this is your first time listening, don’t be fooled into thinking...

Greg kicks off the episode with a sigh of relief: "Life is good—no one’s spilled my bodily fluids over any parking lots." But that doesn't mean he’s not stirring up some suburban chaos.

First up, Greg embraces his new role as "trailer guy"—but vows never to be that trailer guy stranded on the roadside without a spare tire. Andy points out that some boat owners don’t even think to bring a spare, leading to Gr...

Are you a Disney family?  NO, was Greg’s answer. Disney apologists say, it’s not an amusement park. You’re right!  It’s not amusing. The sidewalks are narrow, food is bad. The rides suck. Greg’s favorite part? Leaving. How did the kids feel?  Grace liked the Mini ears.  You can buy those online after going to an Amusement park.

Did you know Ruth’s Chris has a dress code?

If you were thinking about wearing “pool attire” think again as...

In Season 2, Episode 53 of Welcome to the Suburbs, Andy kicks things off with a pressing question: “What’s your favorite part of shopping at Costco?” Greg’s response? “Leaving!” It’s crowded, people block aisles chatting like they’re at a dinner party, and he’s convinced Prosecco on tap and a string quartet are next.

So, what did Greg actually buy? Milk, eggs, and… a natural gas generator. Andy chimes in with, “Some people eat lunch...

Welcome to Season 2, Episode 52 of *Welcome to The Suburbs Podcast*! This week, we dive into Greg and Keely’s unforgettable cottage renovation adventure. What some saw as a teardown, Greg and Keely envisioned as a charming retreat with endless potential. Endless being the key word  

The 86-year-old, 600-square-foot cottage sat on an acre of land with lake access. Its charm? Questionable. The roof leaked, the furnace was dead, and th...

Part 1: What happened at the concert, stays at the concert, unless it’s COVID. Then you take it home and share.  Greg was at the John Hiatt show, took a look at the age of the crowd filing in, then said, “based on the age of this crowd I bet everyone sits during the show.”  John Hiatt superfan shot him the stink eye as she parked her walker to take a toke of oxygen. One toke over the line sweet Jesus. 

Part 2:  Greg and Keely were s...