October 9, 2024 • 46 mins
Jennie, Susan and Kathy are giving you intimate details of their sex lives. From sex toys to viagra, Jennie Garth is blushing as Susan and Kathy reveal every intimate detail. Plus, top secret insights about Joan and the “Golden Bachelorette” including who Susan is flirting with this season. If you’re looking for your Part 2, this is the sex education you need.
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:14):
Welcome, Welcome. This is I Do Part two, an innovative,
one of a kind experiment in podcasting and love. We
are going to rip the band aid off you guys
and talk about all the things you need to know
if you're jumping back into the relationship pool. I did
basically a belly flop when I jump back in. I'd
(00:36):
been married for seventeen years and I would have rather
licked I de can't. I don't know something really gross
than to have to start dating again later in my life.
But that's what happened, and I was not prepared. So
we are going to get you prepped and ready for
this next amazing chapter in your life. We're going to
(00:58):
get you ready to open yourself up to love again,
and I am excited. I'm one of your hosts, Jenny Garth.
This week we are going to talk about a very
important part of a romantic relationship, sex, more specifically sex
in our second act. And if you know me, you
(01:20):
know I can get a little squirmy when the sex
topic comes up. That's one area of my life that
I like to keep private. So I'm so relieved that
I'm going to be joined by two fab women. You know,
them from The Golden Bachelor and their podcast, Bachelor Happy Hour.
Golden Hour, Please welcome Susan Knowles and Kathy Schwartz to
(01:42):
the podcast.
Speaker 2 (01:44):
Ladies.
Speaker 1 (01:46):
Oh my gosh, you're beautiful and you're beautiful.
Speaker 3 (01:49):
That was a great entry and I am not squeamish
at all.
Speaker 2 (01:53):
Okay, good, it's a natural bodily function.
Speaker 1 (01:59):
Well, let's just jump in. I want to talk to you, ladies,
about what Goldiehan recently said. Goldiehan and Kurt Russell have
been together for forty years, and she recently said that the
secret to a long lasting relationship is good sex. So
let's talk about that. What do you think. Do you
agree when you're in your fifties and your sixties, is
(02:22):
good sex important or is it more about companionship.
Speaker 2 (02:26):
I think that good sex is important in every marriage
or every relationship, not even marriage, just every relationship. And
it doesn't matter if you're twenty or seventy. And I
think it looks a little bit different. You know, women
after they go through menopause, you know, get as dry
as the Saharan desert, and that you've got to deal
(02:48):
with that.
Speaker 1 (02:48):
Okay, we're ripping it off, guys.
Speaker 3 (02:50):
Here nothing's off topic, unless, of course, you get bioidentical hormones.
And I'm as wet as a teenager, so is you not?
Speaker 2 (03:01):
Between the two of us were normal?
Speaker 1 (03:03):
Oh my goodness.
Speaker 3 (03:05):
I feel like it's it's very important at least intimacy,
because some men at a certain age cannot perform one way.
There's always orals, you know what you should be very
comfortable with. But intimacy is very important, whether their sexual
act itself is done or not, just making out or touching.
Speaker 2 (03:26):
Right. Yeah, And I also remember after I went through menopause.
I remember that having sex it was freeing in a
way because you know, you didn't have to worry about
getting pregnant. I remember that distinctly. Oh this is great.
I think frequency changes, not that I didn't use birth control.
I'm just saying the worry of oh God, did I
(03:48):
take my pill? Where is my I youd gonna fall out?
I mean things, you don't worry about it anymore. But
I think that maybe frequency changes.
Speaker 1 (03:55):
How often do you think in a healthy relationship should
somebody be having sex?
Speaker 2 (03:59):
What time is it.
Speaker 3 (04:00):
You don't have kids in the house anymore, like you
have a lot more free time. So yeah, a lot
more than when I was married raising kids.
Speaker 1 (04:08):
Yeah, so two times a week, three times a week,
four time. I need numbers.
Speaker 2 (04:12):
Ends on the.
Speaker 4 (04:13):
Week and your life schedule.
Speaker 2 (04:15):
I think it depends on the guy. Yeah, it does.
My personal experience has been that. So my husband, you know,
passed away, and my sexual relationships since then have not
been as good as it was for my husband.
Speaker 4 (04:30):
But had one. In other words, I had.
Speaker 2 (04:32):
I had. The men that I have had sex with,
all of them are on that blue pill. One of
them had an internal battery pack. I mean, yeah, why
did I get to that?
Speaker 1 (04:46):
I need to know more about.
Speaker 4 (04:47):
This, I tho, I was, can you recharge the battery?
Speaker 1 (04:53):
How do you guys even meet your guys?
Speaker 2 (04:56):
Like?
Speaker 1 (04:56):
How do you meet guys?
Speaker 4 (04:59):
That's the hard part, is it?
Speaker 2 (05:01):
Well?
Speaker 4 (05:02):
Do I bring that up? I mean I'm dyas okay?
Speaker 2 (05:06):
Yeah? Why we both agree? Dating apps for us, they
they have not worked. And in my case, we've talked
about this too. We're I'm very active. I do lots
of things, you know, bicycle and play golf and walk
and snowski and we're open and we're open to dating
(05:26):
younger men. But it's hard at our age because.
Speaker 4 (05:29):
They want somebody younger. They want somebody younger.
Speaker 1 (05:32):
Yeah, the men your age want younger.
Speaker 2 (05:34):
Now, yeah, they're fools.
Speaker 3 (05:37):
However, we have a little story.
Speaker 2 (05:40):
It just happened last night, the night before, and I
can verify this is all true. What she's about to say.
Speaker 1 (05:46):
Okay, okay, lay it on me.
Speaker 3 (05:48):
So Kathy keeps an eye on my spending, if you will,
because I could go crazy. And we were in the
shopping plaza and I saw a pretty cool store and
not something you see all the time. Of course I
fall love with an outfit. I'm in the dressing room
and the gentleman comes back in to see if I
need anything, and it was expensive, and I said to him,
to me a favor, take my charge, go bring this
(06:10):
up because she don't, you know, a buy.
Speaker 2 (06:13):
She doesn't want me to bitch and moan about the
money she's spent, because you know, Susans, I was saying,
stop me from shopping until she shops, and then it's
left me shop, so go ahead.
Speaker 3 (06:21):
So long story short, he had all my information. I
come out and she catches the sunny out and it
was funny. Two hours three and three hours later we
went to dinner or in the back of an uber
on our way back to the hotel and I get
a text message, Susan, if you'd like to have some
fun before you leave on Friday, I would be happy
to be your boy toy.
Speaker 2 (06:43):
What And he was like twenty eight years old? Oh
my god, we had died. We were down. Then the
guy in the uber, I said how old are you?
He goes twenty and I said great, we got a
boy toy shop.
Speaker 1 (06:56):
Oh my god, this is so fascinating. Okay, so I
did not respond.
Speaker 2 (07:03):
You did that?
Speaker 4 (07:03):
Okay, not respond?
Speaker 1 (07:05):
Well, you know what I expected you to respond. Actually,
I know, right, I disappointed you. Okay, So, how so
you meet a guy? How long do you wait to
have sex? Like later in life? You because I'm like, okay,
time is ticking and I don't know, I have a
lot of time to waste here.
Speaker 3 (07:23):
So there used to be a rule, right, you had
to wait I don't know, six dates or three months
or whatever. I don't know if that was a Catholic
thing is.
Speaker 1 (07:32):
I don't know. I think it's what we teach our daughters.
Speaker 2 (07:36):
Yeah. Really, Oh it's my daughter going to hear this.
Speaker 4 (07:38):
Ooops, I don't on the first date.
Speaker 2 (07:40):
No, you know, I've had sex with a guy that
I didn't know that well, interestingly, the guy that I
was most interested in since my husband passed away. I
didn't have sex with him because I'm It's not that
I'm old fashioned, it's that I felt like if I
had sex with him, it was going to mean something
(08:01):
to me that we were going down that road, and
I think he was just he kept saying to me,
you know, sex is just an experience and to getting
to know you and not.
Speaker 1 (08:09):
No, yeah, it's different. It means different things for different people.
Speaker 2 (08:13):
Absolutely, So I didn't.
Speaker 3 (08:15):
Do you think that once you give it up that
you lose control? That's been said, Yeah, once you give
it up, then.
Speaker 1 (08:23):
You're invested emotionally. That's for me, yes, yeah, that's I
think the big difference between women and men generally speaking.
Speaker 2 (08:32):
I don't think of sex as going out and playing
around of golf like it's it's not. It's an experience,
but it's you know, it's not like grocery shopping either,
like to me at me something.
Speaker 1 (08:43):
So yeah, I think to a lot of people it does.
Chemistry is super important, like that energy that you just
almost can't even describe. Have you ever had to end
a relationship because there wasn't chemistry in the bedroom. Yep,
really no, Susan always has chemistry in the bedroom. Liqut her.
Speaker 2 (09:03):
Oh wait, so we're could have just stopped it. Susan
has chemistry.
Speaker 4 (09:07):
I don't get to the bedroom if there's no chemistry.
Speaker 2 (09:10):
I didn't. Yeah, I didn't exactly because I didn't end
it because there was no chemistry in the bedroom. I
ended it because the lack of chemistry in the bedroom.
And it was just another thing on the list.
Speaker 3 (09:22):
It was like the cherry on top, exactly what I
will share when they don't kiss well or make out well.
Speaker 4 (09:30):
That is part of sex.
Speaker 1 (09:31):
It's so important.
Speaker 3 (09:32):
Yeah, it's part of the partner that doesn't do that part.
Like everything else was great, and I'm like, yeah, no,
I'm missing that.
Speaker 1 (09:40):
You need it. It's good. I mean, at our age,
we know what we want, what we need, and what
we don't want, and we don't that's scary.
Speaker 2 (09:48):
Y I will say to you. I think that's another
difference of women being older, or maybe it's just Susan
and I are outspoken. But I have no problem telling
the guy what I want and what works for me.
And I think what younger women sometimes are afraid to
do that.
Speaker 1 (10:03):
Yeah, they want to please, please, they want to please.
Speaker 2 (10:05):
Now.
Speaker 3 (10:06):
I make men feel uncomfortable because I tell them what
I do. I have toys, I have my own. I
gave one Kathy for her birthday. It's called the Womanizer.
You know, it's made a man. However, I made that
physical touch. I missed that making out. But as far
as pleasing myself or having an orgasm, if you will,
that's done on a regular The closest I.
Speaker 2 (10:28):
Have come to an orgasm recently is using Nars blush,
and the name of it is called orgasm.
Speaker 1 (10:45):
Do you think you can teach someone to be a
better lover?
Speaker 3 (10:49):
You can direct and you can speak it and tell
them what it is you like. Either they know where
that area is or they don't.
Speaker 2 (11:00):
I don't think all men necessarily are invested in learning
how to please a woman.
Speaker 3 (11:07):
I think some are and some are well you would
know that.
Speaker 2 (11:11):
So you've got to bed Susan.
Speaker 1 (11:14):
You mentioned before the little blue pill. Yeah, okay, so
I've never messed around with a little blue pill. My
husband is nine years younger than me, So we need
like the opposite, like uh nap, I want instead a
viagra I want nap agra. Viagra is incredibly common with
men of a certain age.
Speaker 2 (11:33):
You never would yeah, really since my husband who didn't
need via.
Speaker 3 (11:39):
But at they have problems, they have problems.
Speaker 2 (11:43):
But so unless you're like Susan, you know, who's got
a pellet in her ass that keeps her, you know,
sliding down the mountain. It's just has sex changes you.
You have to be comfortable using whatever it takes right
to both parties, both what I'm saying, it just looks diffid.
Speaker 1 (12:05):
Have you ever gotten with a guy and maybe you
didn't discuss it first and then realized, oh, he's on
it and this is going to be a problem tonight.
Speaker 3 (12:15):
He's on it, meaning he's taken.
Speaker 1 (12:18):
He's taken for a few hours.
Speaker 3 (12:20):
And yeah, you're like, dude, you better come to Colm
four hours, Tom, Can I just tell you?
Speaker 2 (12:26):
I think that's maybe it's having you. It's a myth
that it lasts four hours.
Speaker 4 (12:32):
Yeah, I don't know how long did it last? They say?
Speaker 3 (12:36):
The commercial says, if in four hours, I don't go down.
Speaker 2 (12:39):
To to the hospital, would you love that? Rushing the myth?
Excuse me, excuse me, we have a critical issue here.
Speaker 1 (12:47):
On it I think they would right away.
Speaker 2 (12:49):
The issue, the blue bill issue. Help.
Speaker 4 (12:52):
Oh my god, they should make a blue pill for women.
Speaker 2 (12:56):
They do, I will say they do, they, But Jenny,
I will tell you I have a lot of friends
who are younger than I am, in their forties and fifties,
and they, many of them tell me their sex drive
is gone and they don't want sex. And menopausal women, Yeah,
menopausal women. I think that's a big issue too.
Speaker 3 (13:17):
Not for me, but well, doctor explained to me one time.
He gave me percentages, and I could be off, but
he said eighty some percent of women going through menopause
lose there there, and then a very small percentage stay
the same, and then an even smaller percentage of women
(13:40):
there are libido increases. And I was like a dog
in heat in menopause. Yeah, before that, in my married life,
I was just normal, No, And I didn't know I
could feel certain ways until way later in life.
Speaker 1 (13:53):
Like, how how old were you when this happened my fifties?
Speaker 2 (13:57):
In your fifties, I was fifty exactly, and I'm like Susan,
it didn't change. I mean, my sex drive was as
always healthy and still is.
Speaker 1 (14:04):
I think you guys are lucky.
Speaker 2 (14:06):
You're a lot of I'm telling you. And I've talked
to men and some of my friends who are now divorced,
and they said that was one of the big things
that contributed to their divorce. They didn't want sex and
their husband did, and they were like, move on, I can't.
Speaker 3 (14:22):
We've all been that person though at night. To keep
your husband happy, you just go through the motions and
hurry up.
Speaker 2 (14:27):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (14:28):
I know now at this stage of the game, I
enjoy every minute of it, live it up because it's
more about me than about satisfying them.
Speaker 1 (14:37):
Now right, Well, that's what happens. You've decided to choose yourself,
which I love so much about you. So is it
weird to discuss sexual history with a partner at this age?
Speaker 3 (14:49):
I do ask the question. I mean I haven't in
a few years because I don't had a date, but
I would ask the question, Number one, have you been tested?
I mean, are you healthy? I don't for proof on
the papers, but I do have the conversation.
Speaker 1 (15:04):
Because you don't want to get as a TV any
kind of no. You want to make sure there again.
Speaker 2 (15:10):
And where I'm coming from the sexual experiences I've had,
it's usually Like one guy I dated, he and his
wife had that sex and ten years like he was
like he was re entering the whole world of intimacy,
which I found incredibly bizarre, But you know, it is
something to consider.
Speaker 3 (15:29):
I know women that have gone years and have no desire,
which is okay if that's okay with them.
Speaker 2 (15:36):
It's only okay in my mind if both parties agreed.
I think that really, you know, they talk about what
hurts marriages. I mean obviously finances, disagreement about finances, raising children,
But I think people underplay how important sex is in
a marriage and can break up a marriage.
Speaker 3 (15:56):
I have friends that you know, actually Kathy, that do
not have sex, heat struggles and she doesn't care, so
their marriage is perfect.
Speaker 4 (16:05):
They have a great time.
Speaker 2 (16:06):
But so, justin why aren't we dating? We are sexual beings.
Speaker 3 (16:09):
Well know, you think it's because we're too loud or
up front or too strong strung.
Speaker 1 (16:15):
Maybe yeah, I mean guys are intimidated by that, but.
Speaker 2 (16:22):
We'd like to Oh, sorry, that is the plan.
Speaker 1 (16:25):
You're funny. You're funny. Okay, Wait, I have a question, Yes,
as women of your age, my age, do you still
get hung up on body image? Like you know, when
it's time to get naked, do you get insecure or
nervous about the way you look?
Speaker 2 (16:39):
We have different answers. So a little known fact but
becoming more and more well known. Back in another life.
Body my body image problems because I used to weigh
two hundred pounds. So for me, I still look in
the mirror and see, you know, a fat person and
so and my skin is you know, because I was heavy.
(17:02):
My skin is not as tight even though I work out.
Speaker 3 (17:05):
Shin isn't it as tight as our age?
Speaker 2 (17:07):
I know, but it's exacerbated by the fact that I
wait so much. So for me it's in the beginning
it's a little struggle and then I get over it.
But for me, it's a little struggle in the beginning.
Speaker 1 (17:19):
I'm going to guess that you don't have body image issues.
When it's time to get naked.
Speaker 3 (17:24):
I feel a little self conscious for about thirty seconds.
Speaker 1 (17:27):
Yeah, do you like to dim the lights?
Speaker 2 (17:30):
No?
Speaker 4 (17:31):
No, I used to.
Speaker 3 (17:31):
I used to be a dark girl, yes, because I
didn't want him to see anything.
Speaker 2 (17:35):
And now it's like, wait, it is what it is.
Speaker 3 (17:37):
I wouldn't sleep with somebody that I wasn't comfortable with
do you know what I mean? I would know this
person prior to getting into bed with him. So I
was quite surprised the last time that, you know, I know,
I'm sorry.
Speaker 4 (17:51):
It's not what it.
Speaker 2 (17:51):
Used to be.
Speaker 4 (17:52):
Things aren't as firm.
Speaker 3 (17:53):
And he was like, oh my god, the way you
dress you look so much bigger.
Speaker 4 (17:58):
You have an amazing body.
Speaker 1 (18:00):
I was like, that's good to hear. That makes you
do it.
Speaker 2 (18:05):
I think men struggle that a little bit too. So
it's kind of a two way street there, right.
Speaker 1 (18:10):
You're in your head about it and they're in their
head about it for themselves.
Speaker 2 (18:14):
So and I think, like most things, if you just
communicate that fact that, hey, you know, I'm a little
self conscious at my age, I can say that. But
when I was younger, please don't look, yeah tell me
or yeah I would. She pulled up really quickly. Now
now it's like good, like Susan. It's a little uncomfortable
to beginning asking what the hell.
Speaker 3 (18:34):
I've grown into my own skin? Though I don't care anymore.
And I know men appreciate a woman's body, and it's
at sixty seven, it's not perfect, right, you know what
I mean? But they still appreciate, but the point is
they're not perfect.
Speaker 1 (18:46):
No right, yeah, no, well the problem is they're looking
for younger perfect girls.
Speaker 2 (18:51):
So that you and Kathy both say that a lot.
I want to know, Jenny, how you got a guy
nine years younger? Yeah? What if we do? That's what
I because Jenny's younger than us. That that's what I want.
I want, But you know you're want younger.
Speaker 1 (19:03):
I was going to ask you, like, do what how
do you feel about dating younger men? Is there a range,
like an age range you stick to you?
Speaker 2 (19:08):
I would date someone ten years younger.
Speaker 3 (19:10):
I just yeah, probably depending on the mano ten. But
my thing is like when we come from similar errors,
we like the same music and we like that.
Speaker 4 (19:22):
It's things in life.
Speaker 2 (19:25):
Also also, you know, you I want a guy who's
retired because I want to travel, I want to do
things I don't want to you know, have the cocktail
waiting and you know his slid five. Yeah, I mean cook,
she don't call. But I'm great in bed, so it
is it's out. That's right.
Speaker 1 (19:41):
There's definitely a difference because if you're dating a younger guy,
they're innately in a different place in their life developmentally,
so you have to know what you're getting into.
Speaker 2 (19:51):
I don't think that's necessarily true. I realized that I'm
that I'm I'm different in that I'm really fit. When
we're on the golden Bachslore, you know, I in the
pick aball contest, in swimming races, I would I am
very fit. I work out in the gym. I hype
for you. I'm just saying I'm kind of an outlier
in that way. You don't want to and I don't
(20:13):
want to used to die. That's my thing. I've said,
it's just the show. I don't want to. Guy who says,
you know, I used to play tennis, I used to kayak,
I used to swim, and now I sit on the sofa.
I don't want to used to die?
Speaker 1 (20:25):
I like that.
Speaker 2 (20:26):
Yeah, so it's hard. It's hard to find those guys
that'll that will not look at my age number, will
just say, you know what, she looks like, she might
be interesting. I'm going to give her a shot. That's
what I'm looking for that guy. My son, Susan actually
performed the marriage. My son was divorced and met and
Susan married them in She's ten years older than my
(20:49):
son and they are great together, great march.
Speaker 1 (20:53):
That's so good to hear. Yeah, I mean personally speaking,
it's had its challenges and luckily Mike nine year younger
husband acts like he's eighty so and I have a
thing for older men, like I love older men, but
I'm with a younger man. But it works out because
he acts like an old man.
Speaker 2 (21:14):
Media.
Speaker 1 (21:15):
That was a setup, like a blind date, as blind
as you can get in this day and age. I
looked him up, but I think I found the wrong
guy because the guy I looked up was a Chipendale's dancer.
Long story anyways, it was a setup. I'll send you
the Chip and Dale's guy.
Speaker 2 (21:34):
Talk about bodies, right, Yeah, that's what.
Speaker 4 (21:37):
I don't know what I do with that, Like, can
I touch it?
Speaker 2 (21:41):
I know, right, But I do think that, you know,
just getting back to our original conversation, I unless unless
you want to set us something, then we can just
go from there. But I really do think that I'm
surprised at the number of women who literally will say
to me, i've had my children, I don't care about sex,
and I always feel like a freak because I really
(22:03):
enjoy seving and a lot of women just don't. So
I don't know. I you know, I don't care.
Speaker 1 (22:11):
That's the thing to each their own. Whatever works for you.
But it's good if you're with somebody that you're on
the same page.
Speaker 3 (22:18):
That's really So it's not just the idea of sex,
like men can go out and have one night stand.
Speaker 4 (22:23):
It's just the sex thing is good.
Speaker 3 (22:25):
I like the romance, the intimacy, the intimacy, and.
Speaker 2 (22:29):
That's what I was saying earlier. Like for me, if
I'm going to do bet with the man, there's I
feel something. It's not It's like I said, it's not
an activity. It's not like the French and the Italians.
It's just such ya su.
Speaker 1 (22:44):
I like I call it pillow talk.
Speaker 4 (22:46):
I like, yes, I want to get romantic.
Speaker 1 (22:51):
Yeah, I love it. Okay, So do you guys sext
Is sexting a thing?
Speaker 2 (22:58):
Have I ever?
Speaker 4 (22:59):
I don't sex, Kathy, No, like, thank god.
Speaker 1 (23:05):
Our guys in their fifties and sixties sexting still yeah.
Speaker 2 (23:10):
And now you know with with video, I mean there's
all kinds of stuff that goes on. I will personally
say I do not send pictures because I know those
could end up anywhere.
Speaker 3 (23:22):
Oh Jeff, you might see my boobs out there somewhere.
Speaker 1 (23:26):
I'm gonna look for. I'm gonna google it, seas.
Speaker 2 (23:29):
Boobs are everywhere, Let's be honest.
Speaker 4 (23:33):
That's funny.
Speaker 1 (23:35):
I mean, yeah, I'm not that comfortable with sexting or
anything in writing like that. I can come back to you.
Speaker 4 (23:42):
But talking dirty? Do you like to talk dirty?
Speaker 3 (23:45):
So when I was younger, I was very intimidated by that.
Speaker 4 (23:50):
Very well, when I'm When we were younger, we didn't talk.
Speaker 2 (23:53):
There wasn't texting, I mean talking you it was like
you picked up phone. You know, they had a road redial,
you remember.
Speaker 3 (24:02):
And then when things get in my head, then I
start overthinking things and then i'm doing.
Speaker 2 (24:08):
I don't think sexin is as big though, at least
for me, it's not as big a thing. I want
it in person, you know, I want to touch.
Speaker 4 (24:16):
The connection, the connection.
Speaker 1 (24:18):
I feel like the phone is a cop out.
Speaker 3 (24:19):
Well, if I want to get somebody's attention that I
haven't seen, Like I'm in a relationship and I haven't
seen el, send a little sexy shot or something nothing
that I mortified about to get them go.
Speaker 4 (24:30):
And then they're like Jesus, It's like they're like.
Speaker 2 (24:36):
Susan's got a guy, but we can't talk about it yet,
but a guy that she's sort of maybe and chatting with.
And I saw her video with him this morning.
Speaker 1 (24:45):
Wait wait, wait, is this the guy for Marshalls.
Speaker 2 (24:48):
No, he's gone.
Speaker 4 (24:49):
Okay, well he's still my friend.
Speaker 1 (24:51):
Okay, good, that's all.
Speaker 3 (24:53):
He wants his friendship. And I'll see him again. I'm
sure I will, but nothing.
Speaker 2 (24:58):
Meanwhile, I've been hanging out Marcus hoping the same thing
happens to me.
Speaker 1 (25:02):
You're stepping it up. You're going to Neiman Marcus.
Speaker 2 (25:04):
That's right now.
Speaker 3 (25:06):
This is a face that's been on television and the
world seemed to think that we were a lot alike
that we should meet.
Speaker 2 (25:13):
And I've been wanting because you know, Susan I are
was out here and out of here in LA and
so they've talked a few times and videoed a couple
of times. In fact, he facetimed her this morning, and
because that's who I am, I picked up the phone
and answered her phone and said, oh hello, I didn't
know you were so interested. And his face was like,
(25:35):
oh you like, where are my child? That's great, but
I but you were very flirty with him. I can
see where this of a chemistry.
Speaker 1 (25:44):
This is exciting.
Speaker 2 (25:45):
Yeah, and you think I was flirty? Are you kidding me?
Speaker 4 (25:49):
What did I do?
Speaker 3 (25:53):
I didn't do it in front of him, but she's
talking about it, and I knew I was going to
see you and I have.
Speaker 2 (25:58):
She was talking about her nip arriving and where nipples. Oh,
I love him and I'm sitting like you marry comfort.
Speaker 1 (26:06):
That is very flirty.
Speaker 2 (26:07):
You're right, but can you believe she just said to me,
Jenny and my flirting talking about your nipples?
Speaker 4 (26:14):
It was something I had to do.
Speaker 2 (26:15):
Excuse me, I got to get off the screen. I
got to put my nipples.
Speaker 1 (26:19):
Yeah, that's not that sexy.
Speaker 2 (26:20):
Sorry, been like this.
Speaker 1 (26:25):
I want to talk about something that's a little you know,
just a little bit more deep.
Speaker 2 (26:29):
You mean Susan's nipples aren't deep enough for I'm.
Speaker 1 (26:32):
Enjoying that conversation greatly, but I want to talk about like,
when you're looking for love again, our minds kind of
automatically go to, oh, they had a divorce, But for
so many out there, looking for love again is because
of a loss. Does having a sexual relationship become more
complicated if your partner has lost a spouse or if
(26:52):
you have lost a.
Speaker 4 (26:53):
Spouse, depending on the time. She could answer that better
than me, because I didn't. But I wouldn't want.
Speaker 3 (26:59):
Somebody friendly out of losing his spouse, his wife. I'm
not going to replace anybody. I couldn't be who he
was with. So I would just hope that there was
some time in between and he was open and ready.
Like when you watch Joan the other night, when last
week when she said I don't know if I'm ready,
and when she accepted the fact that she's not going
(27:22):
to replace her husband. She'll always have the memory of him.
Speaker 4 (27:27):
But that's more. I mean, that's to be opened the law.
Speaker 2 (27:31):
That's true. I think for me, my husband died. It's
five and a half years ago, and I think I
thought I was ready earlier for sex and an intimate
relationship before I really was ready. I mean, I can
honestly say now I will never my husband will. I
always will carry him in my heart, and just like
(27:52):
having children, my heart is expanded to be open to
a new relationship and such. I've never compared. I just
never compared emotionally, intellectually anything. I've never compared everybody because
everyone's different. I think I think it would have been
(28:17):
a lot harder if I'd been in serious relationships too soon.
Speaker 1 (28:22):
You have to have that time to have at that time.
Speaker 2 (28:25):
You know, to get through grief, you have to walk
through it and to get to a place where you're
ready for an intimate relationship. It takes a lot of
work and time. I was never divorced, Susan's divorced. I
think it looks a little different to someone who has
lost a partner that was happily. I mean, all meagers
(28:46):
have issues where you you know your husband's alive and
she was ready to move on. Mine was abruptly taken
from me. So I think it depends on the situation.
Speaker 1 (28:55):
Yeah, well, I'm very sorry for your loss.
Speaker 2 (28:57):
Thank you.
Speaker 1 (28:58):
That's so hard that I know so many women out
there listening are faced with that, and it's it's so
complicated and layered the emotions around it.
Speaker 2 (29:10):
It is, But I just I wish women would understand
that you have to give yourself grace and time. And
you know, my husband died by suicide, so I had
a lot of guilt and fear all kinds of things,
and life is not over. That's the message. I always
your your intimate relationships, you can have another one. It's
(29:33):
not it's not defaming your relationship you had. It's not
saying I forget that. It's just it's it's the one
life we have.
Speaker 3 (29:44):
And other people some women feel like they're not even worthy.
Speaker 2 (29:48):
And yeah, they don't feel worthy, and they feel like
their life is over. And that's the message that life
is not over your sex life. You know you are
in control. You can get up off the sofa and
yourself a new life.
Speaker 3 (30:01):
And I have a suggestion for this, Lady's he womanizer.
Speaker 4 (30:05):
Oh and you do it.
Speaker 1 (30:06):
It's really feels.
Speaker 4 (30:07):
So much better.
Speaker 3 (30:09):
Well, I feel one hundred thousand percent better if I
have an orgasm. It's a healthy thing for me for
my attitude changes. I can roll with this.
Speaker 1 (30:17):
It's a chemical difference.
Speaker 2 (30:20):
Yeah, it's so chemical.
Speaker 4 (30:21):
Yes, it is. The women that are stuck home and
feeling so low. Try it.
Speaker 1 (30:26):
See what happens.
Speaker 3 (30:28):
You'll make yourself happy, might be more open to finding
somebody you.
Speaker 1 (30:33):
Know, right, Yeah, might ignite something.
Speaker 2 (30:35):
I also think women feel guilty. We've talked about this.
I think women at any age sometimes feel guilty for
wanting to feel sexually satisfied, Like you it's that Victorian
thing where you're not supposed to not you know, but
I do think some women. Don't you think some women
feel that way? Oh I hope that's not healthy. I
(30:58):
did say it was healthy.
Speaker 3 (30:59):
I just say feel like they feel like they don't deserve,
not me.
Speaker 2 (31:03):
I think there are women, I think, at every age
who believe sex is something to produce children. You don't
have sex for enjoyment. You have sex because you're going
to appropriate. I think there's still women.
Speaker 4 (31:18):
All the Catholics might still feel like that.
Speaker 2 (31:22):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (31:23):
I feel like that women have always just worried about pleasing, pleasing, pleasing, especially.
Speaker 4 (31:28):
In bed, until you're fifty.
Speaker 1 (31:31):
Until you're fifty, and then you're like.
Speaker 2 (31:33):
Yeah, you know what. I might have said a little
before fifty, but what does your husband please you? First?
Speaker 4 (31:40):
Yes, there's importance right there. Men that want to go
in and go what whoa wha wha what who?
Speaker 3 (31:45):
What?
Speaker 4 (31:45):
What?
Speaker 2 (31:45):
Do we know? My man? Thank you man?
Speaker 3 (31:47):
Though, we're gonna do this, We're gonna have fun, We're
gonna explore each other.
Speaker 2 (31:53):
I'm like, do you have a bus to catch or not?
Speaker 1 (31:56):
Sometimes? Not ever? Don't you ever just want a quick
little thing and be done with it right.
Speaker 4 (32:01):
Oh yeah, that's that when I was married.
Speaker 3 (32:03):
But I don't have a boyfriend now, so I don't
get to do any of the buves.
Speaker 1 (32:07):
You want to enjoy the game.
Speaker 3 (32:09):
When we do it, it's going to take out, going
to milk it having what is that I want?
Speaker 2 (32:19):
Roses and champagne. Room.
Speaker 3 (32:22):
Oh, let's do it for hours and trades, just pouring
raining outside.
Speaker 1 (32:28):
That's the best when it's raining out.
Speaker 2 (32:29):
For a fire race, turned up music, champagne.
Speaker 4 (32:38):
Not so much the lifeguard stand or anything. You know what,
remember those things the back of the car back.
Speaker 5 (32:46):
In the day.
Speaker 1 (32:46):
Wait, you did it in a lifeguard stand.
Speaker 2 (32:49):
I tried. I couldn't do it.
Speaker 1 (32:50):
What do you mean you couldn't do it?
Speaker 4 (32:51):
I mean I stood there while they did it, but
I didn't want to do anything.
Speaker 1 (32:55):
Okay, Yeah, was it in the daytime or a nighttime?
Speaker 4 (33:01):
Nighttime?
Speaker 1 (33:02):
It's just making sure.
Speaker 3 (33:03):
Because I'm so outspoken and comfortable with the conversation of it,
people assume a lot of things about me that are
mostly not true.
Speaker 4 (33:13):
But that's okay if you want to think it.
Speaker 3 (33:15):
I come across like I was easy and have multiple
millions of partners, and I have not, But I'm not
here to explain that to anybody. I don't care what
they don't like. People think I have tattoos all the time.
You must think tattoos everybody.
Speaker 4 (33:31):
Why would they they assume.
Speaker 3 (33:33):
People assume because I'm loud and i'm both bull and I'm.
Speaker 1 (33:38):
Super quiet, and I have tattoos. So there you go.
You don't have any in your loud.
Speaker 2 (33:44):
I've never heard tattoos going with being lacked. I've never
heard that.
Speaker 3 (33:47):
They just it's just a personality thing because I don't
have to say the word of naxis.
Speaker 4 (33:52):
But I'm fine.
Speaker 2 (33:54):
That's what it is.
Speaker 1 (33:55):
You're outspoken. Yeah, you're fun.
Speaker 2 (33:57):
That's what it covered.
Speaker 4 (33:59):
I wrote motorcycle right away. They thought, oh, you're tad.
I'm pierced, but I'm.
Speaker 1 (34:06):
W wait wait, wait, wait we you're pierced yeah in
your ears?
Speaker 4 (34:13):
Yes you're not.
Speaker 2 (34:15):
You're not piercing any place, not anymore because.
Speaker 1 (34:18):
You had to take it out.
Speaker 2 (34:22):
I didn't.
Speaker 4 (34:23):
I made the doctor do it.
Speaker 1 (34:24):
Wait where was the piercing?
Speaker 3 (34:26):
Please?
Speaker 4 (34:26):
Can I okay?
Speaker 1 (34:28):
In your vaginal area? Right, okay, I've never explored that.
Speaker 4 (34:34):
Yes, I did that for my fiftieth birthday.
Speaker 1 (34:36):
Why did you do that?
Speaker 3 (34:38):
Because it was something that I thought was cool and
I didn't want to tattoo you know what, I want
to do something.
Speaker 2 (34:45):
She did it. She could be the guy. It was
called a great conversation starter.
Speaker 1 (34:51):
Oh yeah, well did it hurt? And how was it? No?
Speaker 4 (34:55):
And then it was professionally done?
Speaker 1 (34:57):
And how did it did it get in the way
of things?
Speaker 4 (35:00):
We never never? Actually I thought it would do more
than it did.
Speaker 2 (35:04):
You thought would help you. I thought it.
Speaker 3 (35:06):
Would stimulate either him or I or something that it
was a novel.
Speaker 2 (35:10):
It was, it was. It was an earring that he
lost its partner lost its way.
Speaker 4 (35:17):
I feel like though, at seventy I'm going to do
it again. Okay, yeah, sixty nine.
Speaker 2 (35:23):
Okay, sixty nine, I like that better.
Speaker 1 (35:25):
Yeah, you're probably gonna have to go with her, Kathy
and make sure it's done right.
Speaker 3 (35:31):
I would love for a partner to go with me,
like in a relationship and he think it was cool
and hold my hand and go in and do it
together like that would kill me.
Speaker 1 (35:40):
You are wild. I've had in the nineties. I had
my belly button pierced. That's it. That's about it. I
thought it was so cool. Can we just talk about
the Golden Bachelor at what do you.
Speaker 3 (36:02):
They're all so warm and and they shared their emotions
about it.
Speaker 1 (36:08):
How many times do you cry during one of them?
I can't stop crying.
Speaker 4 (36:12):
Well, I got choked up when their kids came on.
Speaker 2 (36:14):
That was Yeah. I think I think when I thought
about our season, I think that these men are showing,
like we showed on our show, that they're mature, they
have feelings, they know how to have fun, their lives
aren't over, They're ready to be vulnerable. They're they're grateful
for their life experiences and I love that.
Speaker 4 (36:36):
One of the hardest parts for me and I want
to date with one of them.
Speaker 3 (36:40):
I was watching them at the Rose ceremony and that
hope in their eyes.
Speaker 4 (36:44):
I remember what that felt like. Yes, like oh God,
my name.
Speaker 2 (36:51):
But don't you love that the hope you can feel.
Maybe we've talked about this. Maybe its because we were
on the show. We know what they feel, what they're feeling,
and they're all they're hoping for a second chance at love.
Speaker 1 (37:04):
They you know, and then they get disappointed and it's crushing.
Speaker 5 (37:08):
It's so you know whatck Coathy and Susan right, Okay,
just may not be speaking to someone on that show.
Speaker 2 (37:19):
He may or may not be speaking to someone, said
Kathy Noddy, who was on that show.
Speaker 1 (37:25):
Who is it? Is it Charles?
Speaker 2 (37:27):
No?
Speaker 3 (37:27):
Oh, God bless Charles.
Speaker 2 (37:30):
The world loves him.
Speaker 1 (37:31):
I know, how do you think Joan is handling all
these men? And who do you think she has the
most chemistry with?
Speaker 3 (37:38):
Well, from the day one, we had a couple of
people and we had we had a different form.
Speaker 2 (37:45):
But guy, we thought she got and Jordan.
Speaker 1 (37:51):
Wait, wait, In this week's episode, Chalk did some shocking things.
He went home because his mother passed away. So then
he came back.
Speaker 4 (38:01):
That's just it, that's it.
Speaker 2 (38:03):
He came back.
Speaker 3 (38:05):
You know why because he's falling in love and I
think she has a sparkle in our eyes for him
with that version.
Speaker 2 (38:12):
We know her, we know Joan, So when she was
on the day, you could see a sparkling, right. I mean,
like I said it from the beginning, my money's on Chalk.
That's why I thought it, from the first time I
saw them together.
Speaker 1 (38:26):
Well, thank god he came back then.
Speaker 4 (38:27):
And it's funny because that's what Joe.
Speaker 2 (38:30):
Trust me, we've tried to find out Joan won't tell.
Speaker 4 (38:33):
Us on our show.
Speaker 3 (38:34):
It was that first important date that he ended up with,
whether very great decision or not. But that's Teresa was
the first date that they bonded over similar things. And
I just saw the same thing with Chuck and Joan body.
Speaker 2 (38:51):
So it's also the look. I mean, I know, I'm
not sure people you know out in Vachelor Nation, but
we know her, we're friends with her. And then there's
a look in her eye, the smile. We were watching
together and we both put each other and that's looking
pretty promising. And we know who's left over, yeah, we know.
And then there's I think Guy. I think she's interested
(39:13):
in Guy. He's the er doctor. I mean, she's she's
getting down to it now because she's sending lots of people.
Speaker 1 (39:20):
Home and tough. Yeah, it's so hard. I have to
ask you this though in your your season, would you
have slept with Gary?
Speaker 2 (39:32):
That's where she says.
Speaker 1 (39:33):
No, emphatic no, across the board. That's what I thought.
Speaker 2 (39:39):
Great now, But you know what I'm I Both Susan
and I are the same on this. We were in
the friend zone real quickly with Gary, and he's a
nice guy. But but I would not I would not
want to send the message to the world that you know,
I've done this guy for three weeks and and talk
to him, you know, accumulation of what an hour and
(40:00):
a half if I had a one on one And
now I'm gonna bed down.
Speaker 3 (40:04):
Let's see just what I have with the show is
they don't get enough time to get to know each other.
Speaker 2 (40:12):
I wish I think Jones getting more time.
Speaker 3 (40:14):
Well, yes he has a two hour show, but I
really wish that they would maybe lessen the amount of
people and let an actual, you know, relationship start with
several people to make that decision and Quarry.
Speaker 2 (40:29):
We've talked to Gary and he said to me, I
wish I'd gotten to know you better, Kathy. I just
didn't know who you were. And that's true. We caught
up in the moment we got moment we hardly talked.
Speaker 3 (40:41):
I mean, although I'm grateful there is a show, but
now rumor has some I don't know, paradise thing for a.
Speaker 2 (40:47):
Seniors Susan's going to be exhibiting all her tattoos.
Speaker 1 (40:52):
Right, I'm so ready for that.
Speaker 2 (40:54):
I'm going to be wearing.
Speaker 4 (40:55):
However, they can't do it the same number one.
Speaker 3 (40:57):
I'm not going with bugs and I'm not worry.
Speaker 1 (41:02):
But paradise to us is different, way different.
Speaker 3 (41:07):
Yes, it's like my idea camping is no phone in
the room.
Speaker 2 (41:13):
But you know what I got to say, I could
fall in love. We're both sitting on that way fall
You fall fast and fall hard. If I found something
I was interested in, yeah, I could see me falling.
Speaker 3 (41:25):
In love well, but I was head over heels over Gary.
I would have been a whole different character. I was
totally man, you can't hide from you.
Speaker 2 (41:34):
One of us wanted to go pick corn and you know,
run through corn mazes in Indiana, Like it wasn't an
exciting but he's a nice time.
Speaker 1 (41:42):
Do you think that in the Fantasy Sweet episode, yes,
I just what happens in there when the cameras are.
Speaker 3 (41:51):
Off, something that needs to happen happens. You are not
being filmed, you are not being recorded. You speak from
the soul. The majority of the world thinks you're getting late,
and maybe.
Speaker 4 (42:03):
Some people do. Oh, I think I think not.
Speaker 2 (42:06):
It's a bad I don't know because we were not
in the Fantasy suite right with each other or conversations,
but I think they have the conversations about you know,
Fancis and life and children. Does it work? Yeah, but
I think they all take the blue pill or is
this a nutural thing? You know what? That would not
(42:26):
be the conversation I'd be having the fantasy suite. But
I think that those are important conversations to have because
it's such a truncated section of your life. It's fast
experience and.
Speaker 4 (42:39):
But you need those.
Speaker 2 (42:40):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (42:41):
Yeah, I know Joe made a statement prior to the
show that she was not going to sleep over. Well,
you know what, people get late in two hours and
you could still leave the room at two am.
Speaker 4 (42:52):
So don't think that's what's going to convince the world.
I'm serious.
Speaker 1 (42:56):
Well, she's she's going into it trying to be respectable,
but she wants to put out the right message. You
guys are so amazing. I love that you're just like
open books and talking to women of a certain age
about all this because nobody's talking about it, and we
should all be just talking about openly and sharing our experiences.
Speaker 3 (43:16):
Even women at a younger age can get things from us.
Speaker 4 (43:20):
Absolutely.
Speaker 2 (43:21):
Yeah, we started this whole thing. I said, it's a
normal body function. It's like sex should be part of
everyone's life. It's part of life and a good sex life.
Speaker 3 (43:32):
But I have daughters, you don't want to experience it
until way later, well until.
Speaker 2 (43:38):
They're mostly ready. But you know, I think we're old enough.
Speaker 4 (43:43):
We are not dead yet.
Speaker 1 (43:45):
You you are in your prime, this lumor, you're both
so amazing, and it's okay to want different things in
your relationships as you grow and change, you know, and
just identifying them those things and knowing what's important to
you and finding a person that matches up.
Speaker 3 (44:05):
And possibly a lot of your listeners and a lot
of people judge both of us, but I know I've
been judged for well, I'm not like you, Susan.
Speaker 4 (44:14):
I'm not outgoing, and I'm not this, and I'm not that.
Speaker 3 (44:18):
But you have feelings inside, you have thoughts, and when
you become of a certain age, you're less intimidated maybe
by what others are thinking.
Speaker 2 (44:30):
You're comfortable in your own skin. But I think also
she's absolutly right. I couldn't agree with you more.
Speaker 3 (44:37):
That's nice scary when we're your brain.
Speaker 2 (44:41):
But here's the thing. I think I would want your
listeners to know that life doesn't begin to end with sex.
And so people who are sitting at home saying I'm
afraid to date. I don't know what to do. I
think my body's good enough. All those things that we
do to ourselves, I think it's a progression, and so
try the woman Why I know it's to get out
(45:04):
there and live your life and build relationships, then use
the womanizer, then go back out. In other words, sex good,
healthy sex, like intimacy, doesn't just happen right. You have
to get out and do things. And I think sometimes
women are intimidated by putting themselves out there. So don't be.
Speaker 3 (45:24):
Intimidated out And the only other thing I could hopefully
suggest is be comfortable in your own skins. Be okay
with your body, no matter what it looks like, because
none of us look great except who you are.
Speaker 2 (45:38):
Except who you are.
Speaker 1 (45:40):
Yes, that's my whole thing. I just want everybody who's
listening to remember. If you take nothing away from this conversation,
take away the fact that the second time around at
love starts with loving yourself.
Speaker 2 (45:53):
If you don't love yourself, you can't possibly love someone else.
You have to love your self to be open to
letting someone love you and loving them back.
Speaker 1 (46:05):
Words of wisdom. I love you guys, if you are single,
and ready to find love again. Or you want to
ask me questions about love and dating and relationships, then
call us at one eight four four four I Do Pod.
That's eight four four four four three six seven six three,
or you can email us I Do Pod at iHeartRadio
(46:27):
dot com and be sure to follow us on Instagram.
I Do Part two Pod. That's the number two. I
Do Part two Pod. I Do Part two an iHeartRadio
podcast where falling in love is the main objective.
Welcome, Welcome. This is I Do Part two, an innovative,
one of a kind experiment in podcasting and love. We
are going to rip the band aid off you guys
and talk about all the things you need to know
if you're jumping back into the relationship pool. I did
basically a belly flop when I jump back in. I'd
(00:36):
been married for seventeen years and I would have rather
licked I de can't. I don't know something really gross
than to have to start dating again later in my life.
But that's what happened, and I was not prepared. So
we are going to get you prepped and ready for
this next amazing chapter in your life. We're going to
(00:58):
get you ready to open yourself up to love again,
and I am excited. I'm one of your hosts, Jenny Garth.
This week we are going to talk about a very
important part of a romantic relationship, sex, more specifically sex
in our second act. And if you know me, you
(01:20):
know I can get a little squirmy when the sex
topic comes up. That's one area of my life that
I like to keep private. So I'm so relieved that
I'm going to be joined by two fab women. You know,
them from The Golden Bachelor and their podcast, Bachelor Happy Hour.
Golden Hour, Please welcome Susan Knowles and Kathy Schwartz to
(01:42):
the podcast.
Speaker 2 (01:44):
Ladies.
Speaker 1 (01:46):
Oh my gosh, you're beautiful and you're beautiful.
Speaker 3 (01:49):
That was a great entry and I am not squeamish
at all.
Speaker 2 (01:53):
Okay, good, it's a natural bodily function.
Speaker 1 (01:59):
Well, let's just jump in. I want to talk to you, ladies,
about what Goldiehan recently said. Goldiehan and Kurt Russell have
been together for forty years, and she recently said that the
secret to a long lasting relationship is good sex. So
let's talk about that. What do you think. Do you
agree when you're in your fifties and your sixties, is
(02:22):
good sex important or is it more about companionship.
Speaker 2 (02:26):
I think that good sex is important in every marriage
or every relationship, not even marriage, just every relationship. And
it doesn't matter if you're twenty or seventy. And I
think it looks a little bit different. You know, women
after they go through menopause, you know, get as dry
as the Saharan desert, and that you've got to deal
(02:48):
with that.
Speaker 1 (02:48):
Okay, we're ripping it off, guys.
Speaker 3 (02:50):
Here nothing's off topic, unless, of course, you get bioidentical hormones.
And I'm as wet as a teenager, so is you not?
Speaker 2 (03:01):
Between the two of us were normal?
Speaker 1 (03:03):
Oh my goodness.
Speaker 3 (03:05):
I feel like it's it's very important at least intimacy,
because some men at a certain age cannot perform one way.
There's always orals, you know what you should be very
comfortable with. But intimacy is very important, whether their sexual
act itself is done or not, just making out or touching.
Speaker 2 (03:26):
Right. Yeah, And I also remember after I went through menopause.
I remember that having sex it was freeing in a
way because you know, you didn't have to worry about
getting pregnant. I remember that distinctly. Oh this is great.
I think frequency changes, not that I didn't use birth control.
I'm just saying the worry of oh God, did I
(03:48):
take my pill? Where is my I youd gonna fall out?
I mean things, you don't worry about it anymore. But
I think that maybe frequency changes.
Speaker 1 (03:55):
How often do you think in a healthy relationship should
somebody be having sex?
Speaker 2 (03:59):
What time is it.
Speaker 3 (04:00):
You don't have kids in the house anymore, like you
have a lot more free time. So yeah, a lot
more than when I was married raising kids.
Speaker 1 (04:08):
Yeah, so two times a week, three times a week,
four time. I need numbers.
Speaker 2 (04:12):
Ends on the.
Speaker 4 (04:13):
Week and your life schedule.
Speaker 2 (04:15):
I think it depends on the guy. Yeah, it does.
My personal experience has been that. So my husband, you know,
passed away, and my sexual relationships since then have not
been as good as it was for my husband.
Speaker 4 (04:30):
But had one. In other words, I had.
Speaker 2 (04:32):
I had. The men that I have had sex with,
all of them are on that blue pill. One of
them had an internal battery pack. I mean, yeah, why
did I get to that?
Speaker 1 (04:46):
I need to know more about.
Speaker 4 (04:47):
This, I tho, I was, can you recharge the battery?
Speaker 1 (04:53):
How do you guys even meet your guys?
Speaker 2 (04:56):
Like?
Speaker 1 (04:56):
How do you meet guys?
Speaker 4 (04:59):
That's the hard part, is it?
Speaker 2 (05:01):
Well?
Speaker 4 (05:02):
Do I bring that up? I mean I'm dyas okay?
Speaker 2 (05:06):
Yeah? Why we both agree? Dating apps for us, they
they have not worked. And in my case, we've talked
about this too. We're I'm very active. I do lots
of things, you know, bicycle and play golf and walk
and snowski and we're open and we're open to dating
(05:26):
younger men. But it's hard at our age because.
Speaker 4 (05:29):
They want somebody younger. They want somebody younger.
Speaker 1 (05:32):
Yeah, the men your age want younger.
Speaker 2 (05:34):
Now, yeah, they're fools.
Speaker 3 (05:37):
However, we have a little story.
Speaker 2 (05:40):
It just happened last night, the night before, and I
can verify this is all true. What she's about to say.
Speaker 1 (05:46):
Okay, okay, lay it on me.
Speaker 3 (05:48):
So Kathy keeps an eye on my spending, if you will,
because I could go crazy. And we were in the
shopping plaza and I saw a pretty cool store and
not something you see all the time. Of course I
fall love with an outfit. I'm in the dressing room
and the gentleman comes back in to see if I
need anything, and it was expensive, and I said to him,
to me a favor, take my charge, go bring this
(06:10):
up because she don't, you know, a buy.
Speaker 2 (06:13):
She doesn't want me to bitch and moan about the
money she's spent, because you know, Susans, I was saying,
stop me from shopping until she shops, and then it's
left me shop, so go ahead.
Speaker 3 (06:21):
So long story short, he had all my information. I
come out and she catches the sunny out and it
was funny. Two hours three and three hours later we
went to dinner or in the back of an uber
on our way back to the hotel and I get
a text message, Susan, if you'd like to have some
fun before you leave on Friday, I would be happy
to be your boy toy.
Speaker 2 (06:43):
What And he was like twenty eight years old? Oh
my god, we had died. We were down. Then the
guy in the uber, I said how old are you?
He goes twenty and I said great, we got a
boy toy shop.
Speaker 1 (06:56):
Oh my god, this is so fascinating. Okay, so I
did not respond.
Speaker 2 (07:03):
You did that?
Speaker 4 (07:03):
Okay, not respond?
Speaker 1 (07:05):
Well, you know what I expected you to respond. Actually,
I know, right, I disappointed you. Okay, So, how so
you meet a guy? How long do you wait to
have sex? Like later in life? You because I'm like, okay,
time is ticking and I don't know, I have a
lot of time to waste here.
Speaker 3 (07:23):
So there used to be a rule, right, you had
to wait I don't know, six dates or three months
or whatever. I don't know if that was a Catholic
thing is.
Speaker 1 (07:32):
I don't know. I think it's what we teach our daughters.
Speaker 2 (07:36):
Yeah. Really, Oh it's my daughter going to hear this.
Speaker 4 (07:38):
Ooops, I don't on the first date.
Speaker 2 (07:40):
No, you know, I've had sex with a guy that
I didn't know that well, interestingly, the guy that I
was most interested in since my husband passed away. I
didn't have sex with him because I'm It's not that
I'm old fashioned, it's that I felt like if I
had sex with him, it was going to mean something
(08:01):
to me that we were going down that road, and
I think he was just he kept saying to me,
you know, sex is just an experience and to getting
to know you and not.
Speaker 1 (08:09):
No, yeah, it's different. It means different things for different people.
Speaker 2 (08:13):
Absolutely, So I didn't.
Speaker 3 (08:15):
Do you think that once you give it up that
you lose control? That's been said, Yeah, once you give
it up, then.
Speaker 1 (08:23):
You're invested emotionally. That's for me, yes, yeah, that's I
think the big difference between women and men generally speaking.
Speaker 2 (08:32):
I don't think of sex as going out and playing
around of golf like it's it's not. It's an experience,
but it's you know, it's not like grocery shopping either,
like to me at me something.
Speaker 1 (08:43):
So yeah, I think to a lot of people it does.
Chemistry is super important, like that energy that you just
almost can't even describe. Have you ever had to end
a relationship because there wasn't chemistry in the bedroom. Yep,
really no, Susan always has chemistry in the bedroom. Liqut her.
Speaker 2 (09:03):
Oh wait, so we're could have just stopped it. Susan
has chemistry.
Speaker 4 (09:07):
I don't get to the bedroom if there's no chemistry.
Speaker 2 (09:10):
I didn't. Yeah, I didn't exactly because I didn't end
it because there was no chemistry in the bedroom. I
ended it because the lack of chemistry in the bedroom.
And it was just another thing on the list.
Speaker 3 (09:22):
It was like the cherry on top, exactly what I
will share when they don't kiss well or make out well.
Speaker 4 (09:30):
That is part of sex.
Speaker 1 (09:31):
It's so important.
Speaker 3 (09:32):
Yeah, it's part of the partner that doesn't do that part.
Like everything else was great, and I'm like, yeah, no,
I'm missing that.
Speaker 1 (09:40):
You need it. It's good. I mean, at our age,
we know what we want, what we need, and what
we don't want, and we don't that's scary.
Speaker 2 (09:48):
Y I will say to you. I think that's another
difference of women being older, or maybe it's just Susan
and I are outspoken. But I have no problem telling
the guy what I want and what works for me.
And I think what younger women sometimes are afraid to
do that.
Speaker 1 (10:03):
Yeah, they want to please, please, they want to please.
Speaker 2 (10:05):
Now.
Speaker 3 (10:06):
I make men feel uncomfortable because I tell them what
I do. I have toys, I have my own. I
gave one Kathy for her birthday. It's called the Womanizer.
You know, it's made a man. However, I made that
physical touch. I missed that making out. But as far
as pleasing myself or having an orgasm, if you will,
that's done on a regular The closest I.
Speaker 2 (10:28):
Have come to an orgasm recently is using Nars blush,
and the name of it is called orgasm.
Speaker 1 (10:45):
Do you think you can teach someone to be a
better lover?
Speaker 3 (10:49):
You can direct and you can speak it and tell
them what it is you like. Either they know where
that area is or they don't.
Speaker 2 (11:00):
I don't think all men necessarily are invested in learning
how to please a woman.
Speaker 3 (11:07):
I think some are and some are well you would
know that.
Speaker 2 (11:11):
So you've got to bed Susan.
Speaker 1 (11:14):
You mentioned before the little blue pill. Yeah, okay, so
I've never messed around with a little blue pill. My
husband is nine years younger than me, So we need
like the opposite, like uh nap, I want instead a
viagra I want nap agra. Viagra is incredibly common with
men of a certain age.
Speaker 2 (11:33):
You never would yeah, really since my husband who didn't
need via.
Speaker 3 (11:39):
But at they have problems, they have problems.
Speaker 2 (11:43):
But so unless you're like Susan, you know, who's got
a pellet in her ass that keeps her, you know,
sliding down the mountain. It's just has sex changes you.
You have to be comfortable using whatever it takes right
to both parties, both what I'm saying, it just looks diffid.
Speaker 1 (12:05):
Have you ever gotten with a guy and maybe you
didn't discuss it first and then realized, oh, he's on
it and this is going to be a problem tonight.
Speaker 3 (12:15):
He's on it, meaning he's taken.
Speaker 1 (12:18):
He's taken for a few hours.
Speaker 3 (12:20):
And yeah, you're like, dude, you better come to Colm
four hours, Tom, Can I just tell you?
Speaker 2 (12:26):
I think that's maybe it's having you. It's a myth
that it lasts four hours.
Speaker 4 (12:32):
Yeah, I don't know how long did it last? They say?
Speaker 3 (12:36):
The commercial says, if in four hours, I don't go down.
Speaker 2 (12:39):
To to the hospital, would you love that? Rushing the myth?
Excuse me, excuse me, we have a critical issue here.
Speaker 1 (12:47):
On it I think they would right away.
Speaker 2 (12:49):
The issue, the blue bill issue. Help.
Speaker 4 (12:52):
Oh my god, they should make a blue pill for women.
Speaker 2 (12:56):
They do, I will say they do, they, But Jenny,
I will tell you I have a lot of friends
who are younger than I am, in their forties and fifties,
and they, many of them tell me their sex drive
is gone and they don't want sex. And menopausal women, Yeah,
menopausal women. I think that's a big issue too.
Speaker 3 (13:17):
Not for me, but well, doctor explained to me one time.
He gave me percentages, and I could be off, but
he said eighty some percent of women going through menopause
lose there there, and then a very small percentage stay
the same, and then an even smaller percentage of women
(13:40):
there are libido increases. And I was like a dog
in heat in menopause. Yeah, before that, in my married life,
I was just normal, No, And I didn't know I
could feel certain ways until way later in life.
Speaker 1 (13:53):
Like, how how old were you when this happened my fifties?
Speaker 2 (13:57):
In your fifties, I was fifty exactly, and I'm like Susan,
it didn't change. I mean, my sex drive was as
always healthy and still is.
Speaker 1 (14:04):
I think you guys are lucky.
Speaker 2 (14:06):
You're a lot of I'm telling you. And I've talked
to men and some of my friends who are now divorced,
and they said that was one of the big things
that contributed to their divorce. They didn't want sex and
their husband did, and they were like, move on, I can't.
Speaker 3 (14:22):
We've all been that person though at night. To keep
your husband happy, you just go through the motions and
hurry up.
Speaker 2 (14:27):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (14:28):
I know now at this stage of the game, I
enjoy every minute of it, live it up because it's
more about me than about satisfying them.
Speaker 1 (14:37):
Now right, Well, that's what happens. You've decided to choose yourself,
which I love so much about you. So is it
weird to discuss sexual history with a partner at this age?
Speaker 3 (14:49):
I do ask the question. I mean I haven't in
a few years because I don't had a date, but
I would ask the question, Number one, have you been tested?
I mean, are you healthy? I don't for proof on
the papers, but I do have the conversation.
Speaker 1 (15:04):
Because you don't want to get as a TV any
kind of no. You want to make sure there again.
Speaker 2 (15:10):
And where I'm coming from the sexual experiences I've had,
it's usually Like one guy I dated, he and his
wife had that sex and ten years like he was
like he was re entering the whole world of intimacy,
which I found incredibly bizarre, But you know, it is
something to consider.
Speaker 3 (15:29):
I know women that have gone years and have no desire,
which is okay if that's okay with them.
Speaker 2 (15:36):
It's only okay in my mind if both parties agreed.
I think that really, you know, they talk about what
hurts marriages. I mean obviously finances, disagreement about finances, raising children,
But I think people underplay how important sex is in
a marriage and can break up a marriage.
Speaker 3 (15:56):
I have friends that you know, actually Kathy, that do
not have sex, heat struggles and she doesn't care, so
their marriage is perfect.
Speaker 4 (16:05):
They have a great time.
Speaker 2 (16:06):
But so, justin why aren't we dating? We are sexual beings.
Speaker 3 (16:09):
Well know, you think it's because we're too loud or
up front or too strong strung.
Speaker 1 (16:15):
Maybe yeah, I mean guys are intimidated by that, but.
Speaker 2 (16:22):
We'd like to Oh, sorry, that is the plan.
Speaker 1 (16:25):
You're funny. You're funny. Okay, Wait, I have a question, Yes,
as women of your age, my age, do you still
get hung up on body image? Like you know, when
it's time to get naked, do you get insecure or
nervous about the way you look?
Speaker 2 (16:39):
We have different answers. So a little known fact but
becoming more and more well known. Back in another life.
Body my body image problems because I used to weigh
two hundred pounds. So for me, I still look in
the mirror and see, you know, a fat person and
so and my skin is you know, because I was heavy.
(17:02):
My skin is not as tight even though I work out.
Speaker 3 (17:05):
Shin isn't it as tight as our age?
Speaker 2 (17:07):
I know, but it's exacerbated by the fact that I
wait so much. So for me it's in the beginning
it's a little struggle and then I get over it.
But for me, it's a little struggle in the beginning.
Speaker 1 (17:19):
I'm going to guess that you don't have body image issues.
When it's time to get naked.
Speaker 3 (17:24):
I feel a little self conscious for about thirty seconds.
Speaker 1 (17:27):
Yeah, do you like to dim the lights?
Speaker 2 (17:30):
No?
Speaker 4 (17:31):
No, I used to.
Speaker 3 (17:31):
I used to be a dark girl, yes, because I
didn't want him to see anything.
Speaker 2 (17:35):
And now it's like, wait, it is what it is.
Speaker 3 (17:37):
I wouldn't sleep with somebody that I wasn't comfortable with
do you know what I mean? I would know this
person prior to getting into bed with him. So I
was quite surprised the last time that, you know, I know,
I'm sorry.
Speaker 4 (17:51):
It's not what it.
Speaker 2 (17:51):
Used to be.
Speaker 4 (17:52):
Things aren't as firm.
Speaker 3 (17:53):
And he was like, oh my god, the way you
dress you look so much bigger.
Speaker 4 (17:58):
You have an amazing body.
Speaker 1 (18:00):
I was like, that's good to hear. That makes you
do it.
Speaker 2 (18:05):
I think men struggle that a little bit too. So
it's kind of a two way street there, right.
Speaker 1 (18:10):
You're in your head about it and they're in their
head about it for themselves.
Speaker 2 (18:14):
So and I think, like most things, if you just
communicate that fact that, hey, you know, I'm a little
self conscious at my age, I can say that. But
when I was younger, please don't look, yeah tell me
or yeah I would. She pulled up really quickly. Now
now it's like good, like Susan. It's a little uncomfortable
to beginning asking what the hell.
Speaker 3 (18:34):
I've grown into my own skin? Though I don't care anymore.
And I know men appreciate a woman's body, and it's
at sixty seven, it's not perfect, right, you know what
I mean? But they still appreciate, but the point is
they're not perfect.
Speaker 1 (18:46):
No right, yeah, no, well the problem is they're looking
for younger perfect girls.
Speaker 2 (18:51):
So that you and Kathy both say that a lot.
I want to know, Jenny, how you got a guy
nine years younger? Yeah? What if we do? That's what
I because Jenny's younger than us. That that's what I want.
I want, But you know you're want younger.
Speaker 1 (19:03):
I was going to ask you, like, do what how
do you feel about dating younger men? Is there a range,
like an age range you stick to you?
Speaker 2 (19:08):
I would date someone ten years younger.
Speaker 3 (19:10):
I just yeah, probably depending on the mano ten. But
my thing is like when we come from similar errors,
we like the same music and we like that.
Speaker 4 (19:22):
It's things in life.
Speaker 2 (19:25):
Also also, you know, you I want a guy who's
retired because I want to travel, I want to do
things I don't want to you know, have the cocktail
waiting and you know his slid five. Yeah, I mean cook,
she don't call. But I'm great in bed, so it
is it's out. That's right.
Speaker 1 (19:41):
There's definitely a difference because if you're dating a younger guy,
they're innately in a different place in their life developmentally,
so you have to know what you're getting into.
Speaker 2 (19:51):
I don't think that's necessarily true. I realized that I'm
that I'm I'm different in that I'm really fit. When
we're on the golden Bachslore, you know, I in the
pick aball contest, in swimming races, I would I am
very fit. I work out in the gym. I hype
for you. I'm just saying I'm kind of an outlier
in that way. You don't want to and I don't
(20:13):
want to used to die. That's my thing. I've said,
it's just the show. I don't want to. Guy who says,
you know, I used to play tennis, I used to kayak,
I used to swim, and now I sit on the sofa.
I don't want to used to die?
Speaker 1 (20:25):
I like that.
Speaker 2 (20:26):
Yeah, so it's hard. It's hard to find those guys
that'll that will not look at my age number, will
just say, you know what, she looks like, she might
be interesting. I'm going to give her a shot. That's
what I'm looking for that guy. My son, Susan actually
performed the marriage. My son was divorced and met and
Susan married them in She's ten years older than my
(20:49):
son and they are great together, great march.
Speaker 1 (20:53):
That's so good to hear. Yeah, I mean personally speaking,
it's had its challenges and luckily Mike nine year younger
husband acts like he's eighty so and I have a
thing for older men, like I love older men, but
I'm with a younger man. But it works out because
he acts like an old man.
Speaker 2 (21:14):
Media.
Speaker 1 (21:15):
That was a setup, like a blind date, as blind
as you can get in this day and age. I
looked him up, but I think I found the wrong
guy because the guy I looked up was a Chipendale's dancer.
Long story anyways, it was a setup. I'll send you
the Chip and Dale's guy.
Speaker 2 (21:34):
Talk about bodies, right, Yeah, that's what.
Speaker 4 (21:37):
I don't know what I do with that, Like, can
I touch it?
Speaker 2 (21:41):
I know, right, But I do think that, you know,
just getting back to our original conversation, I unless unless
you want to set us something, then we can just
go from there. But I really do think that I'm
surprised at the number of women who literally will say
to me, i've had my children, I don't care about sex,
and I always feel like a freak because I really
(22:03):
enjoy seving and a lot of women just don't. So
I don't know. I you know, I don't care.
Speaker 1 (22:11):
That's the thing to each their own. Whatever works for you.
But it's good if you're with somebody that you're on
the same page.
Speaker 3 (22:18):
That's really So it's not just the idea of sex,
like men can go out and have one night stand.
Speaker 4 (22:23):
It's just the sex thing is good.
Speaker 3 (22:25):
I like the romance, the intimacy, the intimacy, and.
Speaker 2 (22:29):
That's what I was saying earlier. Like for me, if
I'm going to do bet with the man, there's I
feel something. It's not It's like I said, it's not
an activity. It's not like the French and the Italians.
It's just such ya su.
Speaker 1 (22:44):
I like I call it pillow talk.
Speaker 4 (22:46):
I like, yes, I want to get romantic.
Speaker 1 (22:51):
Yeah, I love it. Okay, So do you guys sext
Is sexting a thing?
Speaker 2 (22:58):
Have I ever?
Speaker 4 (22:59):
I don't sex, Kathy, No, like, thank god.
Speaker 1 (23:05):
Our guys in their fifties and sixties sexting still yeah.
Speaker 2 (23:10):
And now you know with with video, I mean there's
all kinds of stuff that goes on. I will personally
say I do not send pictures because I know those
could end up anywhere.
Speaker 3 (23:22):
Oh Jeff, you might see my boobs out there somewhere.
Speaker 1 (23:26):
I'm gonna look for. I'm gonna google it, seas.
Speaker 2 (23:29):
Boobs are everywhere, Let's be honest.
Speaker 4 (23:33):
That's funny.
Speaker 1 (23:35):
I mean, yeah, I'm not that comfortable with sexting or
anything in writing like that. I can come back to you.
Speaker 4 (23:42):
But talking dirty? Do you like to talk dirty?
Speaker 3 (23:45):
So when I was younger, I was very intimidated by that.
Speaker 4 (23:50):
Very well, when I'm When we were younger, we didn't talk.
Speaker 2 (23:53):
There wasn't texting, I mean talking you it was like
you picked up phone. You know, they had a road redial,
you remember.
Speaker 3 (24:02):
And then when things get in my head, then I
start overthinking things and then i'm doing.
Speaker 2 (24:08):
I don't think sexin is as big though, at least
for me, it's not as big a thing. I want
it in person, you know, I want to touch.
Speaker 4 (24:16):
The connection, the connection.
Speaker 1 (24:18):
I feel like the phone is a cop out.
Speaker 3 (24:19):
Well, if I want to get somebody's attention that I
haven't seen, Like I'm in a relationship and I haven't
seen el, send a little sexy shot or something nothing
that I mortified about to get them go.
Speaker 4 (24:30):
And then they're like Jesus, It's like they're like.
Speaker 2 (24:36):
Susan's got a guy, but we can't talk about it yet,
but a guy that she's sort of maybe and chatting with.
And I saw her video with him this morning.
Speaker 1 (24:45):
Wait wait, wait, is this the guy for Marshalls.
Speaker 2 (24:48):
No, he's gone.
Speaker 4 (24:49):
Okay, well he's still my friend.
Speaker 1 (24:51):
Okay, good, that's all.
Speaker 3 (24:53):
He wants his friendship. And I'll see him again. I'm
sure I will, but nothing.
Speaker 2 (24:58):
Meanwhile, I've been hanging out Marcus hoping the same thing
happens to me.
Speaker 1 (25:02):
You're stepping it up. You're going to Neiman Marcus.
Speaker 2 (25:04):
That's right now.
Speaker 3 (25:06):
This is a face that's been on television and the
world seemed to think that we were a lot alike
that we should meet.
Speaker 2 (25:13):
And I've been wanting because you know, Susan I are
was out here and out of here in LA and
so they've talked a few times and videoed a couple
of times. In fact, he facetimed her this morning, and
because that's who I am, I picked up the phone
and answered her phone and said, oh hello, I didn't
know you were so interested. And his face was like,
(25:35):
oh you like, where are my child? That's great, but
I but you were very flirty with him. I can
see where this of a chemistry.
Speaker 1 (25:44):
This is exciting.
Speaker 2 (25:45):
Yeah, and you think I was flirty? Are you kidding me?
Speaker 4 (25:49):
What did I do?
Speaker 3 (25:53):
I didn't do it in front of him, but she's
talking about it, and I knew I was going to
see you and I have.
Speaker 2 (25:58):
She was talking about her nip arriving and where nipples. Oh,
I love him and I'm sitting like you marry comfort.
Speaker 1 (26:06):
That is very flirty.
Speaker 2 (26:07):
You're right, but can you believe she just said to me,
Jenny and my flirting talking about your nipples?
Speaker 4 (26:14):
It was something I had to do.
Speaker 2 (26:15):
Excuse me, I got to get off the screen. I
got to put my nipples.
Speaker 1 (26:19):
Yeah, that's not that sexy.
Speaker 2 (26:20):
Sorry, been like this.
Speaker 1 (26:25):
I want to talk about something that's a little you know,
just a little bit more deep.
Speaker 2 (26:29):
You mean Susan's nipples aren't deep enough for I'm.
Speaker 1 (26:32):
Enjoying that conversation greatly, but I want to talk about like,
when you're looking for love again, our minds kind of
automatically go to, oh, they had a divorce, But for
so many out there, looking for love again is because
of a loss. Does having a sexual relationship become more
complicated if your partner has lost a spouse or if
(26:52):
you have lost a.
Speaker 4 (26:53):
Spouse, depending on the time. She could answer that better
than me, because I didn't. But I wouldn't want.
Speaker 3 (26:59):
Somebody friendly out of losing his spouse, his wife. I'm
not going to replace anybody. I couldn't be who he
was with. So I would just hope that there was
some time in between and he was open and ready.
Like when you watch Joan the other night, when last
week when she said I don't know if I'm ready,
and when she accepted the fact that she's not going
(27:22):
to replace her husband. She'll always have the memory of him.
Speaker 4 (27:27):
But that's more. I mean, that's to be opened the law.
Speaker 2 (27:31):
That's true. I think for me, my husband died. It's
five and a half years ago, and I think I
thought I was ready earlier for sex and an intimate
relationship before I really was ready. I mean, I can
honestly say now I will never my husband will. I
always will carry him in my heart, and just like
(27:52):
having children, my heart is expanded to be open to
a new relationship and such. I've never compared. I just
never compared emotionally, intellectually anything. I've never compared everybody because
everyone's different. I think I think it would have been
(28:17):
a lot harder if I'd been in serious relationships too soon.
Speaker 1 (28:22):
You have to have that time to have at that time.
Speaker 2 (28:25):
You know, to get through grief, you have to walk
through it and to get to a place where you're
ready for an intimate relationship. It takes a lot of
work and time. I was never divorced, Susan's divorced. I
think it looks a little different to someone who has
lost a partner that was happily. I mean, all meagers
(28:46):
have issues where you you know your husband's alive and
she was ready to move on. Mine was abruptly taken
from me. So I think it depends on the situation.
Speaker 1 (28:55):
Yeah, well, I'm very sorry for your loss.
Speaker 2 (28:57):
Thank you.
Speaker 1 (28:58):
That's so hard that I know so many women out
there listening are faced with that, and it's it's so
complicated and layered the emotions around it.
Speaker 2 (29:10):
It is, But I just I wish women would understand
that you have to give yourself grace and time. And
you know, my husband died by suicide, so I had
a lot of guilt and fear all kinds of things,
and life is not over. That's the message. I always
your your intimate relationships, you can have another one. It's
(29:33):
not it's not defaming your relationship you had. It's not
saying I forget that. It's just it's it's the one
life we have.
Speaker 3 (29:44):
And other people some women feel like they're not even worthy.
Speaker 2 (29:48):
And yeah, they don't feel worthy, and they feel like
their life is over. And that's the message that life
is not over your sex life. You know you are
in control. You can get up off the sofa and
yourself a new life.
Speaker 3 (30:01):
And I have a suggestion for this, Lady's he womanizer.
Speaker 4 (30:05):
Oh and you do it.
Speaker 1 (30:06):
It's really feels.
Speaker 4 (30:07):
So much better.
Speaker 3 (30:09):
Well, I feel one hundred thousand percent better if I
have an orgasm. It's a healthy thing for me for
my attitude changes. I can roll with this.
Speaker 1 (30:17):
It's a chemical difference.
Speaker 2 (30:20):
Yeah, it's so chemical.
Speaker 4 (30:21):
Yes, it is. The women that are stuck home and
feeling so low. Try it.
Speaker 1 (30:26):
See what happens.
Speaker 3 (30:28):
You'll make yourself happy, might be more open to finding
somebody you.
Speaker 1 (30:33):
Know, right, Yeah, might ignite something.
Speaker 2 (30:35):
I also think women feel guilty. We've talked about this.
I think women at any age sometimes feel guilty for
wanting to feel sexually satisfied, Like you it's that Victorian
thing where you're not supposed to not you know, but
I do think some women. Don't you think some women
feel that way? Oh I hope that's not healthy. I
(30:58):
did say it was healthy.
Speaker 3 (30:59):
I just say feel like they feel like they don't deserve,
not me.
Speaker 2 (31:03):
I think there are women, I think, at every age
who believe sex is something to produce children. You don't
have sex for enjoyment. You have sex because you're going
to appropriate. I think there's still women.
Speaker 4 (31:18):
All the Catholics might still feel like that.
Speaker 2 (31:22):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (31:23):
I feel like that women have always just worried about pleasing, pleasing, pleasing, especially.
Speaker 4 (31:28):
In bed, until you're fifty.
Speaker 1 (31:31):
Until you're fifty, and then you're like.
Speaker 2 (31:33):
Yeah, you know what. I might have said a little
before fifty, but what does your husband please you? First?
Speaker 4 (31:40):
Yes, there's importance right there. Men that want to go
in and go what whoa wha wha what who?
Speaker 3 (31:45):
What?
Speaker 4 (31:45):
What?
Speaker 2 (31:45):
Do we know? My man? Thank you man?
Speaker 3 (31:47):
Though, we're gonna do this, We're gonna have fun, We're
gonna explore each other.
Speaker 2 (31:53):
I'm like, do you have a bus to catch or not?
Speaker 1 (31:56):
Sometimes? Not ever? Don't you ever just want a quick
little thing and be done with it right.
Speaker 4 (32:01):
Oh yeah, that's that when I was married.
Speaker 3 (32:03):
But I don't have a boyfriend now, so I don't
get to do any of the buves.
Speaker 1 (32:07):
You want to enjoy the game.
Speaker 3 (32:09):
When we do it, it's going to take out, going
to milk it having what is that I want?
Speaker 2 (32:19):
Roses and champagne. Room.
Speaker 3 (32:22):
Oh, let's do it for hours and trades, just pouring
raining outside.
Speaker 1 (32:28):
That's the best when it's raining out.
Speaker 2 (32:29):
For a fire race, turned up music, champagne.
Speaker 4 (32:38):
Not so much the lifeguard stand or anything. You know what,
remember those things the back of the car back.
Speaker 5 (32:46):
In the day.
Speaker 1 (32:46):
Wait, you did it in a lifeguard stand.
Speaker 2 (32:49):
I tried. I couldn't do it.
Speaker 1 (32:50):
What do you mean you couldn't do it?
Speaker 4 (32:51):
I mean I stood there while they did it, but
I didn't want to do anything.
Speaker 1 (32:55):
Okay, Yeah, was it in the daytime or a nighttime?
Speaker 4 (33:01):
Nighttime?
Speaker 1 (33:02):
It's just making sure.
Speaker 3 (33:03):
Because I'm so outspoken and comfortable with the conversation of it,
people assume a lot of things about me that are
mostly not true.
Speaker 4 (33:13):
But that's okay if you want to think it.
Speaker 3 (33:15):
I come across like I was easy and have multiple
millions of partners, and I have not, But I'm not
here to explain that to anybody. I don't care what
they don't like. People think I have tattoos all the time.
You must think tattoos everybody.
Speaker 4 (33:31):
Why would they they assume.
Speaker 3 (33:33):
People assume because I'm loud and i'm both bull and I'm.
Speaker 1 (33:38):
Super quiet, and I have tattoos. So there you go.
You don't have any in your loud.
Speaker 2 (33:44):
I've never heard tattoos going with being lacked. I've never
heard that.
Speaker 3 (33:47):
They just it's just a personality thing because I don't
have to say the word of naxis.
Speaker 4 (33:52):
But I'm fine.
Speaker 2 (33:54):
That's what it is.
Speaker 1 (33:55):
You're outspoken. Yeah, you're fun.
Speaker 2 (33:57):
That's what it covered.
Speaker 4 (33:59):
I wrote motorcycle right away. They thought, oh, you're tad.
I'm pierced, but I'm.
Speaker 1 (34:06):
W wait wait, wait, wait we you're pierced yeah in
your ears?
Speaker 4 (34:13):
Yes you're not.
Speaker 2 (34:15):
You're not piercing any place, not anymore because.
Speaker 1 (34:18):
You had to take it out.
Speaker 2 (34:22):
I didn't.
Speaker 4 (34:23):
I made the doctor do it.
Speaker 1 (34:24):
Wait where was the piercing?
Speaker 3 (34:26):
Please?
Speaker 4 (34:26):
Can I okay?
Speaker 1 (34:28):
In your vaginal area? Right, okay, I've never explored that.
Speaker 4 (34:34):
Yes, I did that for my fiftieth birthday.
Speaker 1 (34:36):
Why did you do that?
Speaker 3 (34:38):
Because it was something that I thought was cool and
I didn't want to tattoo you know what, I want
to do something.
Speaker 2 (34:45):
She did it. She could be the guy. It was
called a great conversation starter.
Speaker 1 (34:51):
Oh yeah, well did it hurt? And how was it? No?
Speaker 4 (34:55):
And then it was professionally done?
Speaker 1 (34:57):
And how did it did it get in the way
of things?
Speaker 4 (35:00):
We never never? Actually I thought it would do more
than it did.
Speaker 2 (35:04):
You thought would help you. I thought it.
Speaker 3 (35:06):
Would stimulate either him or I or something that it
was a novel.
Speaker 2 (35:10):
It was, it was. It was an earring that he
lost its partner lost its way.
Speaker 4 (35:17):
I feel like though, at seventy I'm going to do
it again. Okay, yeah, sixty nine.
Speaker 2 (35:23):
Okay, sixty nine, I like that better.
Speaker 1 (35:25):
Yeah, you're probably gonna have to go with her, Kathy
and make sure it's done right.
Speaker 3 (35:31):
I would love for a partner to go with me,
like in a relationship and he think it was cool
and hold my hand and go in and do it
together like that would kill me.
Speaker 1 (35:40):
You are wild. I've had in the nineties. I had
my belly button pierced. That's it. That's about it. I
thought it was so cool. Can we just talk about
the Golden Bachelor at what do you.
Speaker 3 (36:02):
They're all so warm and and they shared their emotions
about it.
Speaker 1 (36:08):
How many times do you cry during one of them?
I can't stop crying.
Speaker 4 (36:12):
Well, I got choked up when their kids came on.
Speaker 2 (36:14):
That was Yeah. I think I think when I thought
about our season, I think that these men are showing,
like we showed on our show, that they're mature, they
have feelings, they know how to have fun, their lives
aren't over, They're ready to be vulnerable. They're they're grateful
for their life experiences and I love that.
Speaker 4 (36:36):
One of the hardest parts for me and I want
to date with one of them.
Speaker 3 (36:40):
I was watching them at the Rose ceremony and that
hope in their eyes.
Speaker 4 (36:44):
I remember what that felt like. Yes, like oh God,
my name.
Speaker 2 (36:51):
But don't you love that the hope you can feel.
Maybe we've talked about this. Maybe its because we were
on the show. We know what they feel, what they're feeling,
and they're all they're hoping for a second chance at love.
Speaker 1 (37:04):
They you know, and then they get disappointed and it's crushing.
Speaker 5 (37:08):
It's so you know whatck Coathy and Susan right, Okay,
just may not be speaking to someone on that show.
Speaker 2 (37:19):
He may or may not be speaking to someone, said
Kathy Noddy, who was on that show.
Speaker 1 (37:25):
Who is it? Is it Charles?
Speaker 2 (37:27):
No?
Speaker 3 (37:27):
Oh, God bless Charles.
Speaker 2 (37:30):
The world loves him.
Speaker 1 (37:31):
I know, how do you think Joan is handling all
these men? And who do you think she has the
most chemistry with?
Speaker 3 (37:38):
Well, from the day one, we had a couple of
people and we had we had a different form.
Speaker 2 (37:45):
But guy, we thought she got and Jordan.
Speaker 1 (37:51):
Wait, wait, In this week's episode, Chalk did some shocking things.
He went home because his mother passed away. So then
he came back.
Speaker 4 (38:01):
That's just it, that's it.
Speaker 2 (38:03):
He came back.
Speaker 3 (38:05):
You know why because he's falling in love and I
think she has a sparkle in our eyes for him
with that version.
Speaker 2 (38:12):
We know her, we know Joan, So when she was
on the day, you could see a sparkling, right. I mean,
like I said it from the beginning, my money's on Chalk.
That's why I thought it, from the first time I
saw them together.
Speaker 1 (38:26):
Well, thank god he came back then.
Speaker 4 (38:27):
And it's funny because that's what Joe.
Speaker 2 (38:30):
Trust me, we've tried to find out Joan won't tell.
Speaker 4 (38:33):
Us on our show.
Speaker 3 (38:34):
It was that first important date that he ended up with,
whether very great decision or not. But that's Teresa was
the first date that they bonded over similar things. And
I just saw the same thing with Chuck and Joan body.
Speaker 2 (38:51):
So it's also the look. I mean, I know, I'm
not sure people you know out in Vachelor Nation, but
we know her, we're friends with her. And then there's
a look in her eye, the smile. We were watching
together and we both put each other and that's looking
pretty promising. And we know who's left over, yeah, we know.
And then there's I think Guy. I think she's interested
(39:13):
in Guy. He's the er doctor. I mean, she's she's
getting down to it now because she's sending lots of people.
Speaker 1 (39:20):
Home and tough. Yeah, it's so hard. I have to
ask you this though in your your season, would you
have slept with Gary?
Speaker 2 (39:32):
That's where she says.
Speaker 1 (39:33):
No, emphatic no, across the board. That's what I thought.
Speaker 2 (39:39):
Great now, But you know what I'm I Both Susan
and I are the same on this. We were in
the friend zone real quickly with Gary, and he's a
nice guy. But but I would not I would not
want to send the message to the world that you know,
I've done this guy for three weeks and and talk
to him, you know, accumulation of what an hour and
(40:00):
a half if I had a one on one And
now I'm gonna bed down.
Speaker 3 (40:04):
Let's see just what I have with the show is
they don't get enough time to get to know each other.
Speaker 2 (40:12):
I wish I think Jones getting more time.
Speaker 3 (40:14):
Well, yes he has a two hour show, but I
really wish that they would maybe lessen the amount of
people and let an actual, you know, relationship start with
several people to make that decision and Quarry.
Speaker 2 (40:29):
We've talked to Gary and he said to me, I
wish I'd gotten to know you better, Kathy. I just
didn't know who you were. And that's true. We caught
up in the moment we got moment we hardly talked.
Speaker 3 (40:41):
I mean, although I'm grateful there is a show, but
now rumor has some I don't know, paradise thing for a.
Speaker 2 (40:47):
Seniors Susan's going to be exhibiting all her tattoos.
Speaker 1 (40:52):
Right, I'm so ready for that.
Speaker 2 (40:54):
I'm going to be wearing.
Speaker 4 (40:55):
However, they can't do it the same number one.
Speaker 3 (40:57):
I'm not going with bugs and I'm not worry.
Speaker 1 (41:02):
But paradise to us is different, way different.
Speaker 3 (41:07):
Yes, it's like my idea camping is no phone in
the room.
Speaker 2 (41:13):
But you know what I got to say, I could
fall in love. We're both sitting on that way fall
You fall fast and fall hard. If I found something
I was interested in, yeah, I could see me falling.
Speaker 3 (41:25):
In love well, but I was head over heels over Gary.
I would have been a whole different character. I was
totally man, you can't hide from you.
Speaker 2 (41:34):
One of us wanted to go pick corn and you know,
run through corn mazes in Indiana, Like it wasn't an
exciting but he's a nice time.
Speaker 1 (41:42):
Do you think that in the Fantasy Sweet episode, yes,
I just what happens in there when the cameras are.
Speaker 3 (41:51):
Off, something that needs to happen happens. You are not
being filmed, you are not being recorded. You speak from
the soul. The majority of the world thinks you're getting late,
and maybe.
Speaker 4 (42:03):
Some people do. Oh, I think I think not.
Speaker 2 (42:06):
It's a bad I don't know because we were not
in the Fantasy suite right with each other or conversations,
but I think they have the conversations about you know,
Fancis and life and children. Does it work? Yeah, but
I think they all take the blue pill or is
this a nutural thing? You know what? That would not
(42:26):
be the conversation I'd be having the fantasy suite. But
I think that those are important conversations to have because
it's such a truncated section of your life. It's fast
experience and.
Speaker 4 (42:39):
But you need those.
Speaker 2 (42:40):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (42:41):
Yeah, I know Joe made a statement prior to the
show that she was not going to sleep over. Well,
you know what, people get late in two hours and
you could still leave the room at two am.
Speaker 4 (42:52):
So don't think that's what's going to convince the world.
I'm serious.
Speaker 1 (42:56):
Well, she's she's going into it trying to be respectable,
but she wants to put out the right message. You
guys are so amazing. I love that you're just like
open books and talking to women of a certain age
about all this because nobody's talking about it, and we
should all be just talking about openly and sharing our experiences.
Speaker 3 (43:16):
Even women at a younger age can get things from us.
Speaker 4 (43:20):
Absolutely.
Speaker 2 (43:21):
Yeah, we started this whole thing. I said, it's a
normal body function. It's like sex should be part of
everyone's life. It's part of life and a good sex life.
Speaker 3 (43:32):
But I have daughters, you don't want to experience it
until way later, well until.
Speaker 2 (43:38):
They're mostly ready. But you know, I think we're old enough.
Speaker 4 (43:43):
We are not dead yet.
Speaker 1 (43:45):
You you are in your prime, this lumor, you're both
so amazing, and it's okay to want different things in
your relationships as you grow and change, you know, and
just identifying them those things and knowing what's important to
you and finding a person that matches up.
Speaker 3 (44:05):
And possibly a lot of your listeners and a lot
of people judge both of us, but I know I've
been judged for well, I'm not like you, Susan.
Speaker 4 (44:14):
I'm not outgoing, and I'm not this, and I'm not that.
Speaker 3 (44:18):
But you have feelings inside, you have thoughts, and when
you become of a certain age, you're less intimidated maybe
by what others are thinking.
Speaker 2 (44:30):
You're comfortable in your own skin. But I think also
she's absolutly right. I couldn't agree with you more.
Speaker 3 (44:37):
That's nice scary when we're your brain.
Speaker 2 (44:41):
But here's the thing. I think I would want your
listeners to know that life doesn't begin to end with sex.
And so people who are sitting at home saying I'm
afraid to date. I don't know what to do. I
think my body's good enough. All those things that we
do to ourselves, I think it's a progression, and so
try the woman Why I know it's to get out
(45:04):
there and live your life and build relationships, then use
the womanizer, then go back out. In other words, sex good,
healthy sex, like intimacy, doesn't just happen right. You have
to get out and do things. And I think sometimes
women are intimidated by putting themselves out there. So don't be.
Speaker 3 (45:24):
Intimidated out And the only other thing I could hopefully
suggest is be comfortable in your own skins. Be okay
with your body, no matter what it looks like, because
none of us look great except who you are.
Speaker 2 (45:38):
Except who you are.
Speaker 1 (45:40):
Yes, that's my whole thing. I just want everybody who's
listening to remember. If you take nothing away from this conversation,
take away the fact that the second time around at
love starts with loving yourself.
Speaker 2 (45:53):
If you don't love yourself, you can't possibly love someone else.
You have to love your self to be open to
letting someone love you and loving them back.
Speaker 1 (46:05):
Words of wisdom. I love you guys, if you are single,
and ready to find love again. Or you want to
ask me questions about love and dating and relationships, then
call us at one eight four four four I Do Pod.
That's eight four four four four three six seven six three,
or you can email us I Do Pod at iHeartRadio
(46:27):
dot com and be sure to follow us on Instagram.
I Do Part two Pod. That's the number two. I
Do Part two Pod. I Do Part two an iHeartRadio
podcast where falling in love is the main objective.
Hosts And Creators
Ben Higgins
Ashley Iaconetti
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