August 28, 2019 • 58 mins
Ben hangs out with Chris and Krystal to relive their Paradise wedding down in Mexico.
They share secrets about what went on behind the scenes at their wedding, including a HUGE problem that went down right before Krystal walked down the aisle.
We break down all the drama at their reception and Chris & Krystal offer some words of advice for Blake.
Plus, we recap last nights episode of Bachelor in Paradise.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
This is the Benn and Ashley I Almost Famous podcast
with I R Radio. Yo yo yo? Did that sound cool?
Is that pretty cool? Yo? Yo yo? Okay. Anyways, Hey,
it's been here. Ashley is making her way from the
East Coast back to the West Coast. She'll be joining
us very soon, and we'll be getting right back into
(00:21):
it together as co host. We still love each other,
We're still together. This podcast is bigger and better than ever.
She just had to take a little lover's break, but
as you heard from her here recently, as she recorded
in New York City, she's coming back soon with that.
We're gonna be bringing Chris and Crystal, who just got
married on last night's episode of Bachelor and Paradise into
(00:41):
studio today. There be co hosting a lot of this
show with me. But before we bring them in, I
want to break down a few things that are happening.
Last night's episode was um I would say, one of
the most entertaining episodes we've seen this season. UM entertaining
and and sometimes a not so fun way. Though. I
(01:05):
want to hear from Chris and Crystal about this, but
I have some very I would say, uh, concrete inconfident
thoughts on their wedding. I didn't love being at that
wedding and having people argue around me the whole time.
That wasn't fun for me to hear. Is actually so
bad that that Jesse and I actually got back to
(01:25):
our room after it was all and said and done,
and Jessica and I said, Wow, what a beautiful wedding,
but what a weird experience at times. I mean, there
was a moment, I'm telling you this, jess and I
were sitting literally sitting in the reception and there is
eight different groups of people arguing. There was multiple people
(01:47):
having tears, there was makeout sessions going on. This is
a wedding, this is a celebration, And finally jess and
I just said this is too much. We've got to go. Um. Yeah,
I want to hear from christ and Crystal beautiful wed
super pumped for them. I'm glad they're coming into studio,
but I'm sure there's some things that dell Field did
not go the way they wanted or maybe not. Maybe
they'll prove me wrong. But before they get in, I
(02:08):
want to break down a few things that are happening.
There's some main points from last night episode outside of
their wedding that we need to talk about. J p
J is on one. The guy is fired up because
he now loves Tasha, and I think for me and
I want to hear from you please emails at been
A Ashley. I heart media dot com or uh use
(02:29):
Twitter and hashtag almost Famous podcast. I can't quite understand
where his love suddenly blossomed for Tassia. I think I
would be feeling this way and feeling for him if
up to this point I had ever seen a sign
that he was super invitation. I know he had said
and mentioned it, but then he goes on these two
(02:49):
dates because Tasha kind of told him to. But these
two dates, it wasn't like he was holding back. It
wasn't like he was thinking about Tasha on both of
these dates. I felt like he was entering into new
relationships with new great people. I know. I know the
Ferguson twins well, they were on our season of the Bachelor,
and Haley Ferguson is a tremendous, tremendous catch. I think
(03:13):
as her sister has now found uh somebody that she loves,
Haley is starting to venture out as well. I see
JPJ go on this date with her, and the only
thing I can think about is this relationship could work.
It could literally work. They're they're very similar people. Um,
they vote. They both are very fun to be around. Uh.
They both are intelligent, even though sometimes when you watch
(03:36):
them you go they a character of themselves, But when
you talk to him, they both have really really good thoughts.
They process things well. But all of a sudden, we
see this whole new JPJ come into play. This j
p J is mad at Derek because Derek is now
into Tatia. And maybe I'm wrong here, maybe I'm alone.
(03:57):
Please tell me if I am. But I'm celebrating Derek
like it's a good thing. He moved, he handled them
the situation well, he didn't give up on the pursuit
of love. He said, I'm gonna stay in this thing.
And then all of a sudden, before his eyes is
his beautiful momentation. Derek says, I'm gonna go after because
she's interested in me as well. I don't think he
did anything wrong, and I want to know what J
(04:17):
p J thought he was doing wrong. We have Tori
in studio with me right now, before we bring Chris
and Crystaline, I gotta get Tori's opinion. What did JPJ
actually feel like Derek was doing wrong and did Derek
do anything wrong? It sounds like the classic he's not
here for the right reasons scenario, and he saw Derek
(04:40):
talked about his podcast too much where he thought, oh,
he just wants to get more content. I mean, trust me,
I'm all for they gave me content. Well, I also
feel like what Derek was saying was no, I was
doing that as it's really cool to opportunities we have
available to us after the show, like after going on,
we do have a podcast we can have opportunities with
(05:01):
and I do want you to come on and chat
about Bachelor in Paradise. So I feel like it was
kind of just work talk. But then JPJ took advantage
of that and manipulated it kind of to make it
seem like, see, Derek's here for the wrong reasons. It's
interesting there's a comment that was made by JPJ says, um,
(05:22):
Derek is on this show and using his bachelor profile
to hook up with girls. Uh, And that's one of
So there's a few things that JPJ has said the
Derek is doing wrong. One he's using the Paradise Show
to enhance his podcast content. Um, the next is uh
that he is using his bachelor fame took up with girls,
(05:44):
and then also he is deceiving everybody in the process.
I think it's a viewer. It's hard. I haven't seen
that yet, and I don't know if many people had,
Like even the people that were on the beach with
Derek were confused by j what JPJ was upset at about.
We saw at the wedding. I understood at the wedding.
I saw him getting mad at Derek at the wedding,
and everybody's like, I don't know what's going on. I
(06:07):
think this is maybe, let's say, in the Most Beautiful Sins,
JPJ really does love Tasha and he's losing his mind
because Tatia is slipping through the cracks. Do you believe
in love at first sight? Yeah, sure, because I swear
this is what happened to him. I don't know. I
don't think. I don't think he loved Tashia as much
(06:29):
until until Derek started Like in Tasia, no, because he
pursued her beforehand and then Tatia said, hey, seek out
other options, and then he went on a date with
Haley and Tajwan. It's all of a sudden become one
of the most dramatic storylines that we're seeing in Paradise.
I am interesting see how it plays out. I want
JPJ to pull it back together. I like the JPJ
(06:51):
that doesn't have to be goofy all the time. He
doesn't have to make everybody laugh all the time. He
doesn't need to gag after everything he puts down his
throat because that seems to be something he's doing. But
JPJ that just lifts people up. The joyful JPJ that
is confident in himself, loving, caring, fun, exciting, and and
very secure in who he is. I don't like the
JPJ im seeing. I want JPG to come back to
(07:14):
normal because I think if he does, my prediction is
if JPJ can wrap this up and get his head
back and right him and take you could actually make
things work. Do you know what I didn't like how
he kept interrupting Derek and wouldn't let him speak. It happens.
It was weird. It was monologue. It was it was weird.
Derek was very calm and collected, and J like I said,
(07:35):
I've never seen a freak out like that. Even on
this show, like it was a uniquely dramatic freak out
that had no sensibility to it. We can oftentimes to
the show. I'm gonna go back to some of the
most villainous people we've ever had in the show. I'm
not gonna mention their names because some of them don't
deserve to have their names mentioned on this podcast. But
sometimes they're arguing things and you're like, oh, that kind
(07:56):
of makes sense. Like, yeah, it's wrong and it's aggressive
and you're not saying the right things, but like, it
kind of makes sense. This one didn't make sense to me.
It was a lot of talking, very little conversation, and
it completely lacked any sensibility. Derek couldn't even a word out.
I don't know what happened to JPG. I wanted I
(08:16):
want jp J to sit down on this podcast at
some point and tell us what happened. Because it was
a breakdown of all breakdowns. This one we'll go back on,
I think and watch years to come. Hey, uh, Chris
and Crystal are getting warmed up. They're getting a vocal
chords ready. We're gonna break down their wedding with him
all the good, bad, ugly, and excitement that came from it.
But before do, let's take a break to talk about
(08:37):
one of our favorite sponsors. Bachelor in Paradise this year
has not missed its drama. We talked to Wells last
week and we both were feeling like the drama is
out kind of weighing the love right now. I do
(08:58):
think we're taking a hearn, but we're getting pretty far
in the season. There's a few couples that were celebrating
right now. I know that we feel pretty confident in
Hannah and Dylan. Finally, UM, Blake is still out there
pursuing love the best of his abilities. Um. I think
we've seen successful couples kind of blossom late in the show,
(09:23):
but at this point, I feel like, tell me if
I'm wrong. We're getting a little late in the game
to really be cheering for any of these couples like
we want to. I mean, I'm I'm thinking back to
the Astroids and Kevin's. Um, I'm thinking back to the
Joe and Kindle's. I'm thinking back to the Tanner in Jades.
(09:44):
I think the closest thing we have to that right
now is is honestly Hannah and Dylan and their their
journey has not been perfect. I don't know if we
we necessarily expect it to be. But even after this episode,
and we'll get into it later, the Clay and the
Coals are even breaking up, it feels like, I mean,
(10:07):
we see Kalen heartbroken during the wedding because of Deaners,
but we also see Connor step in as maybe the hero.
These are all things we want to tease to talk
about later in the podcast, but quite honestly, I believe this.
It's been a great season. It's been fun to watch,
(10:28):
it's been at times hard to watch. But there are
very few couples that I am fully behind other than
Hannah and Dylan. And that's sad to me because I
think a lot of them are on their edge. I
think that I don't think they're gonna make it, really,
mark my words, I don't think. I think Hannah and
Dylan make it, and I think a lot of the
other ones that we're watching right now, I think it
(10:51):
gets it's it's not looking good. Christian and DEMI I think,
oh yeah, Christian, DEMI will make it. I kind of
like feel like that's like, uh, like I don't know
if this makes it. I feel like they're like above
paradise now, Like it's almost like you, of course they're
gonna make it like it just feels like it's such
a good and healthy and positive thing. I don't know
why I watched this down like they are a paradise couple,
(11:13):
but they feel like so much more than a paradise couple,
Like they're out of the dramas, like there's not a
lot outside of their own relationship that could blow up
in their face. Side note, did you see how jess
had a little cameo and the cocktail? Um, Yeah, it's funny.
I I watched it before Jessica did, and I said, Jessica,
(11:34):
you had a really good moment during this show. You're
talking to Clay and I was back in an interview
and she was introducing herself to some of the people
that are at the wedding, and I remember I came
out and then I felt so awkward. I don't know
any of these people. When I was just like spinning
in circles trying to like everybody's trying to mingle with
each other and meet each other. And then we get
to see it on national television where Jessica is talking
(11:55):
to Clay. There's like an argument or somebody or some
girls trying to flirt with Clay, and she comes up
in could just like stands there, smiles and like spencing
circles like I don't want to go, but this this
is a crazy part of this And I think I
mentioned it a few weeks ago on the podcast. I
was at this wedding as well, and in this batch
the world, I've been in it for a long time, right,
I mean, I don't know a lot of these new people,
(12:15):
so I was excited to meet them. But I would
say I'm a veteran, like there's not many from the
many things on this show that is gonna throw me off,
but I'm There's two scenarios. One, I'm sitting uh at
the wedding and I look behind me and there's Connor.
I said, Connor, Ben, nice to finally meet you, and
(12:38):
he's like, oh man, He's like, I want to talk
to you right now, but I'm gonna go talk to
that girl, and just like yes. Second one, Mike, they
well Mike, I'm talking to him and he goes, Dude,
I want to talk to you right now, but I
got to go talk to this girl. Two different occasions.
I got completely ignored, dumped, walked past because I was
(13:00):
at that point I realized I was in the middle
of a television show. I was just hanging out like
I was at a wedding. My final point before we
take one last break before we bring Chris and crystalland
I know they're they're warmed up there. Listen to this.
This is crazy. We met Connor, really tall, good looking dude,
right Hannaby season Hannaby season. We see him come into
(13:21):
the episode at the end this time, and I'm like, Connor,
you've been on the show, Like, are you down on
the beach? I didn't know who was there and who wasn't.
He goes, no, man, I've been in my hotel room
for the last ten days. It's a hotel room, lest
in days. Why because I don't know. He literally came
down to Paradise and he was just chilling until the
beach opened up to have one more man walk in.
(13:43):
Based on how people were going home coming and going,
there wasn't room for another man, so he had to
literally sit in his hotel room. Is that how it works?
You just sit in the hotel room. I guess I've
never been on paradise? Is that wild? Like being in jail?
Poor poor guy? All right, hey, um, let's take one
more break and then we're gonna bring on Chris and
(14:03):
Crystal Live to talk about their beautiful wedding that was
a celebration of all sorts of love, of a commitment
to each other, but also at its own drama. Let's
take a break, all right, Welcome back, hot Chris and
Chris or in studio. Hello, Chris and Crystal? What's going on? Man?
(14:27):
How are you doing? Man? You guys are glowing, trying, man, trying,
you know how it is? Looking good, looking really good.
All right. So we've been talking leading up to getting
you both in the studio about kind of everything leading
up to your wedding, and so we broke all that down.
Now I want to talk about your wedding. Um, first off,
(14:49):
let's start at the beginning. Why did you want to
do your wedding on television? Uh? So this was actually
a long process for Sloani. Uh. Months of talking, months
of negotiations, and um, you know, weighing the pros and
the cons. We knew that doing a televised wedding, UH
(15:10):
would have some risks because we knew that, you know,
not everything could be perfect when it comes to reality TV. However, though,
we thought of all the positives, and some of those
being getting married at a place where we first met
for the first time ever, had our first conversation first
I Love you, first date, and it was very symbolic
for us because we would be able to bring a
(15:31):
new element into that and that was our friends and
family to watch this chapter of love that has evolved
over the last year really come to fruition in front
of their eyes at the place where we met. And
I think it was also a thank you to the
franchise because uh, without all of this, we would have
never found each other. And so I think that really
(15:52):
all played into the decision making that allowed us to
move forward and go ahead with the decision of having
to televised wedding. Yeah, I think that was really well put.
I will say that as we were going through this
wedding planning process, a lot of fear from our past
seasons really started to come back to the surface, and
for us, I was just exposing just some areas we
(16:14):
were still hurt um and ultimately like as we got
closer to the wedding and kind of making that decision.
We ultimately had to decide that these wounds were areas
that we were gonna not let us, let us, you know,
be defined by them, and and instead shoes to step
forward into the future and become better. But it was
(16:34):
areas where we said that this actually requires real work.
What was those things? Like? What are things are you
speaking about? You know I'm talking about Like when I
was on The Bachelor and feeling I just felt so
afraid to be myself, and I think I was so
as I went through that process. I was so scared
of showing people who I really was, that I wouldn't
(16:55):
be accepted, I wouldn't be loved. And a lot of
that trails way back to my child of you know,
being on welfare and government assistance and my dad not
being in the picture and not letting kids at school
know that because they would tease me and make fun
of me, and so kind of carrying this image. And
I realized that I'd been doing that my whole life.
(17:15):
And when I went on The Bachelor and watched it
back and went through all that scrutiny um and getting
this fill and edit, I mean, really, that's that's who
I was, and so just becoming confident in who I am,
the woman I am today and owning my truth and
unapologetically but lovingly being me was a journey to get through.
(17:38):
I want to sit here for a second, Crystal, with you,
because I think this is an interesting point that oftentimes
we can't answer on this podcast. Um, I want to
start one and remind everybody that when Crystal was on
the Bachelor, your journey was not easy. It was not
one that I would say you probably walked out of
it feeling the most love. But you came on Paradise
and it was a completely it was a complete redemption story. Right.
(18:02):
So here's my question for you as somebody and you're
not anymore, You're not viewed this way. You are loved,
you're celebrated. Obviously, you just had a wedding on national television.
I can't wait to continue to talk about it. But
you were the villain after your season you went down
to Paradise, known as the villain. For anybody that comes
on this show and maybe doesn't know themselves fully and
(18:26):
isn't it doesn't have the greatest time on the show,
they don't represent themselves well, or they watch it back
in the Wow, I didn't realize I was such a
jerk or such a egomaniac or whatever. What would be
your advice for them to have their redemption story? How
do you then kind of turn the table? And then
also my follow up to this, and I want you
(18:48):
to because what does it feel like to be completely
love now when at one time you felt isolated from
this world? Yeah, I'd say, um, right now, they're there's
still every now and then that little voice that just
kind of doubts, like am I enough? Like do people
like am I? Am I good enough to get this love?
And and do I feel worthy enough to receive this?
(19:09):
And I do? And it becomes this like daily practice
of reminding myself that it's not about other people validating
me to be happy, to feel worthy. It's about loving
myself and just owning that and embracing that and knowing
that all those hard times that I went through weren't
anything to be ashamed of because they actually gave me
my strength and they defined who I am today. And
(19:31):
I think just honestly, my relationship with Chris is what
really gave me that confidence. Because there was a moment
on the beach when we were in the pool like
day two and he's like, you're a businesswoman. And I never,
even though I had a business, I had never viewed
myself as this entrepreneur, as this businesswoman. And I was like, wow, like,
you see something in me that I couldn't even see
(19:52):
for myself. And I think that's why our our relationship
has evolved, and that's why we got married, is because
we bring out these sides in each other that maybe
at one point we didn't feel worthy. We couldn't see it. Um,
but we're continuously devoted to growing and pushing each other
to really demand more of ourselves and um, and you know,
(20:13):
we're just being surrendering to love. Really. As as great
as that sounds, I think I think one thing that
we don't ever really focus on is how this show,
for those of us who go on it, it's kind
of like a blueprint. And what I mean by that
is is you might have not the best of journeys
going on this show, Um, but that was you in
(20:35):
the moment. A lot of people go on the show
and they blame producers, they blame edits and but at
the end of the day, it was your behavior. And
whether that's ever happened to you before or it just
finally came out. Those were hitting qualities or characteristics that
you saw that you didn't like about yourself. So instead
of deflecting, uh those situations, it's better to uh look
(20:55):
at it in a way of taking full ownership and
embracing it. And what I mean by that is is
use that as fuel to understand that there are things
that are deep in hit and that this show can
bring out. But it's a good thing because that is
a time where you can work on yourself and have
self development and work on a new blueprint for yourself
(21:15):
to become a higher, better version of who you are. Yeah,
that's awesome. And my my advice, going back to your question, Ben,
would be when I was on The Bachelor, there was
a moment where I was blaming and I was pointing
the finger, and then ultimately I realized, hey, I'm a coach,
Like how I grow is through feedback, is through constructive feedback.
So then I started going on Instagram and then I
(21:37):
started reading all the comments and sifting through the messages,
and there was a lot of death threats. There was
a lot of really angry things, but there was also
like nuggets of love and intention and admiration that people had,
and I chose to read those without getting myself involved
in that emotion and instead chose to see see it
as feedback. And it was if someone kept continuously saying
(21:57):
the same thing, then that was obviously like something that
I needed to look at within myself and grow. So
no that particularly we're speaking about Blake. You know, hard
times I'll have to define you. You can grow and
become better as we did, and I really hope that.
And that's another reason why I think we decided to
get married was because we went through this journey of
(22:20):
into the dark but came out because we were together,
because we leaned into this franchise, and because we just
we just surrendered the expectations and just step into who
we were. And I wanted that to be an inspiration
story of that would inspire others that you know, you
can become anybody you want. You deserve anything that you know,
(22:41):
you deserve happiness and love, but you got to do
some work to do it and to get there. What
I want to sit here for a second, because Chris
and Crystal, you've just said something that's never been said
in the two years plus that we've been doing this podcast,
I've never and I want to tell you, anybody out
there listening who has listened for a while will know that.
(23:02):
I think they're probably screaming, like saying, oh my gosh,
this is what Ben has been begging for. But we've
never had a villain air quotes come onto this show
and ever say take ownership in your actions because if
you do, you'll be a better person for it. Chris,
you said it. It's it's you're brilliant and I'm learning
from you. I'm just gonna repeat what you said. You said,
(23:25):
don't deflect what you're seeing. Instead use it as growth,
and when you do that, people respond. We connect through
our our vulnerability, we connect through our weaknesses. And I'm
literally just repeating what you said. So this isn't my
own thoughts here, But what I want to say is
I want to remind the listeners that what has happened
here and what the beauty of this show is, it
(23:45):
does bring out things that we don't always see, and
when you use those as fuel to better yourself, amazing
things can happen. Like these two guys. I'm telling you,
we've never had that nobody's ever done that, and it's
and it is. It is such a breath of fresh
air for me. I've been waiting for that. So with that,
(24:07):
you guys are really smart people with great advice here,
I want you to tag team this. If Blake Blake
does listen to the podcast, Blake's gonna hear this. What
is your advice to Blake right now? Um? I think
my biggest advice would be to really process this, don't
act out of emotion. Uh know that not everyone's perfect.
(24:31):
And I think the biggest thing is that it's it's
so hard to take ownership because we know the truth
about ourselves and we don't want the truth to to
come to to come to life because we know that
we'll be judged. But this is a moment where coming
to truth will set you free from the bondage that
you're that that's holding you back. Because the longer you
(24:51):
continue to hold onto that bondage and you know you
can't break through, breakthrough, you'll just continue to have these issues,
to have these demons over you. And So for Blake,
I mean, he's a great friend of mine. I love him,
and I don't my perception doesn't change of him. However, though,
I do want to rally behind him because I know
that this will be a great stepping stone for Blake
(25:11):
to become even a better man than he previous was
through this journey on the franchise. So I would say
to Blake, don't worry about what people are saying. I
know that you've done what you've done. These actions were
done from you, no matter if there was an excuse
or reason. But just know that this is not what's
going to define you. What's going to define you is
(25:31):
how you respond and how you react in the action
that you take moving forward. I expect to get preached
to today, but come on, Chris, Yeah, that was good.
I'm going to go into UM. I think my advice
as a life and fitness coach to Blake would be
to shut off the phone and make sure you're taking
time every data to better yourself. And you know, I
(25:54):
know people are saying a lot of things and a
lot of opinions about him, but he can't listen to that,
you know, he can't find his worthiness and what other
people are saying. And what I have found to be
most transformative for myself and for my clients is setting
aside time every morning and just waking up with purpose
in a plan that is solely focused on on developing you.
(26:15):
So I love waking up and drinking my lemon water,
pulling out my pen and my journal, and just writing
out whatever is going on in my mind. And I
think for Blake it might be easy to blame things,
but just writing these letters just to get out the
emotions that could be consuming him in his head. And
exactly that Chris said, just kind of reacting out of
emotion and um, a lot of fear that I'm sure
(26:37):
he has right now is going to really help him
get that clarity on the steps that he needs to
take to move forward, because he's got the answers, he
knows what to do. Sometimes we just give other people
that power, but it's until we begin to look within
and understand it's it's not about what's out there, it's
about what's within me. Yeah. Seek uh internally, not externally,
because no one knows what's best for Blake on the
(27:00):
inside besides Blake. And so Blake needs to shut everything
down and listen to himself on the inside and that
will allow him to begin this new path of moving forward.
And when in doubt, Blake. Just watch my season of
the Bachelor and that that doesn't have to define you.
(27:20):
You can move on in a happy, healthy way with
a beautiful wedding. Hey, guys, I really want to talk
about your wedding. I want to celebrate this wedding. I
want to talk about how beautiful it was. I also
want to talk about any of the behind the scenes
things that maybe we didn't see that you were both
feeling um. But I want to break that down in total.
So before we do that, let's take one more break.
We'll get back talking about Chris and Crystal's beautiful wedding.
(27:51):
All right, we got Chris and Crystal in the studio,
whose wedding we just watched on Bachelor in Paradise. Chris
and Crystal, I need you to lead me through this.
I was not, uh, the ones planning your reading. I
had the opportunity to be there with my girlfriend Jessica
uh and it was a beautiful wedding from our perspective.
But the things you didn't see. I want to walk
into this because I did see this part. We all
(28:13):
walk into this event venue. It's a beautiful place at
the Vedanta in Portavarto. Mexico, and we don't really know
what's going to go on though, right, Jessica and I
are going for your wedding. That is our purpose of
being there. We don't know anything else. At this point.
We flew down for Chris and Crystal's wedding. We go
to a cocktailer that we've been invited to, and at
this cocktail we're meeting Chris and Crystal's family, a couple
(28:35):
of other people who are already there from Bachelor Nation
that came down kind of with us that we had
met at the pool earlier. And then the cast shows up.
I mean literally they walked down this like venue space
towards us like a herd of animals, and everybody's heads
turned and we all go, what is happening? We didn't
(28:55):
realize I saw your guys reaction, No idea that you
are so surprised. We had no clue. I had no idea.
But all of a sudden, the show literally came to us,
and like, not when this happens, right, That's what I'm
gonna say. It's not just the cast that comes, it's
the cameramen that come it with them, and it's a
(29:19):
huge group of people coming charging towards the wedding. They
come down, all looking fresh, all looking it's super happy
to be there. You know. The one thing they didn't
see on the show was everybody that got to the wedding.
We're like, we're so glad to be out of the house.
We're like feel like we're you know, it feels like
a different world that we've not entered into together. We
feel like we've gone back into the real world for
a bit. They're super excited to be there to celebrate
(29:39):
you all and to actually get a breath of fresh
air and air conditioning and air conditioning. And very quickly,
and I don't know if how men you watch it
last night on the show, very quickly realized that the
show really did come to us. And this is the
part that all of a sudden, Jessica and I both
started to feel weird about, because there's arguing, there was
mingling of relation and ships, there was new people coming
(30:01):
in during you know, the cocktail hour, and Jessica very
quickly looked at me and she goes, word, this is
the show. Is like, this is like definitely about the
show right now, right And I said it did, and
we she started to get upset for you too, But
I will say it turned quickly once we walked into
the ceremony because at that moment it really was about YouTube.
It was a beautiful wedding that I want you tube
(30:23):
down kind of lead me through because we were nervous
the cocktail hour, felt like it wasn't gonna be this,
but then all of a sudden, it all changed. It
was a drastic shift, and your wedding was a wedding
to be remembered. Um was it everything you hoped it
would be? And it's a tough question that to to
answer because in a sense it is, but in a
(30:44):
sense it isn't. Um. I gotta be honest because obviously
we knew, Um, there could be some elements thrown into
the mix of our wedding, and we knew that there
were risks. Um did we know the whole cast was
gonna come not untill about a dared too before the wedding. Um,
we thought we were going to be possibly giving out
a day card to one couple to come down. So
(31:06):
it was definitely a surprise factor, and we knew that
there could be some some situations taking place. Knowing that
that amount of people with that level of drama going on,
um could interfere, but there were a lot of positives.
I mean, Crystal looked absolutely beautiful. Um. I almost fainted
when she literally was walking down the aisle because I
felt such such an array of emotions. And you know,
(31:28):
it was a breakthrough for me to know that I
was marrying my my life partner, my best friend, and
uh my family right there, my mom front row just
crying and being so happy for me. And these are
emotions and these are memories that will stick with me forever.
And UM, I'm extremely grateful and blessed absolutely um. And
so for that, I am thankful. UM. And I think
(31:51):
this was actually everything that I envisioned, and we did
get what we wanted out of this and and I think, uh,
I think for me personally, that five percent will dessipate
soon enough. UM, you know, because it's just short term.
It's not long term. Everything that's sticking with me is
all the beautiful memories, not the not the little bit
of drauma that that occurred. Yeah, I would say that, Um,
(32:12):
we knew going in that it was going to be
incorporated into an episode, not be a standalone episode, So
it wasn't going to be just about our wedding, and
we knew that there was going to be some cast
that were that would be coming in, and ultimately we
kind of looked each other and we said, well, we're
always down for an adventure. Let's let's say then. And
what was important, the most important thing and the most
(32:33):
special thing for us, especially for me, was that we
got to bring our our family and our close friends
onto the show and have them see what it's like
to actually be a part of this franchise because there's
a little, as you know, it's a little bit of
a disconnect. I'm sure there was like that with Jessica
um As. We had talked about that she doesn't really
know the world, so it's hard for her to comprehend
and grasp like what goes on. So we were really
(32:55):
excited for that element of it. And I would say
everything was perfect up until we were in the reception,
and it was at that point it did feel very
much not about us produced. And there was an element
where Chris and I were standing there and the room
was totally empty and all the castles in their little
corner for filming, and I all of a sudden looked
(33:18):
around and like my microphone was off and no cameras
were honest, and We're like staying there alone, and I
was like, this isn't even about us. Let's go, let's
get out of here. I mean, at the end of
the day, we we left. We left the reception early.
We did. We did. Yeah, and my my friends while
my room has been actually ended up staying there toil
(33:40):
production shut down. But I think Crystal made a great point.
It's just in that moment um, as happy as we were,
we did feel uh a little bit down knowing that
the night wasn't over yet, and we just felt like
the night ended sooner than maybe it should have. Yeah,
the I want to back check because the reception is
(34:02):
something that we just have to talk about. It was wild.
I have so many thoughts on that. Your wedding, though,
will be remembered. It was beautiful, it was a celebration. Um. Yes,
I think watching it on television, there was moments that
felt a little weird, like when Angela walks down the
aisle and Clay is looking there like he's fearful, and well,
you know, I remember we were sitting right across from him,
(34:25):
and I had known the scenario and how it was
going to present itself. And I was watching his face
as she walked down, and I remember when I was
in person, I tapped Jessica was like, that is wild,
Like I know they captured that and watching it back
is going to be rough. It wasn so many photos
about like a screenshot of that. It was Oh my god.
(34:46):
It was um. But your wedding was beautiful, Crystal. You
looked absolutely gorgeous. I'm sure you've been told that a
thousand times. I think you should be told that a
thousand times, a thousand times more. Uh. Chris said it,
he was fainted. You look so good you did. You
looked absolutely beautiful. But I do have to ask, what
(35:09):
in the world is this smudge pot cleansing? And why
were they doing on your genitals? Well, so, um, if
you watched Paradise when Chris and I were on and
where we met, I mean, part of who I am
is I love crystals and I love sage and a
(35:29):
lot of that comes down to energy. And I smudge
daily as part of my morning routine that I recommend
like to do. And uh, what sage does. It removes
negative energy and it just cleans the room and it
allows you to just kind of wash away any any
negativity of the past. It allows you to clean slate.
And I felt that was really symbolic for christ and
(35:50):
I because we wanted to let go of who we were,
of the past, of that of that those hard times,
never forget, but let go of about that trauma, any
of that negativity that we had been prior to now
moving forward as a married couple. So we really wanted
to come into this marriage just clean, cleansed, and new. Yeah,
(36:13):
I think it was very symbolic for us, UH, because
we're very into UH in tune with one another and
when it comes to our energies. This is one of
the biggest breakthroughs we've had in our relationship is that, UM,
we can feed off and understand each other's energy and
and someone doesn't even have to say something. And being
in tune like that allows you to communicate more effectively UM.
(36:36):
And it allows us to not bottle up emotions UM.
And it also helps us identify things within ourselves that
UM we're able to work on rather than not being
able to identify and to to to continue going down
a path of UM not becoming better day in and
day out. So UH this much ceremony. It was our choice,
and we just wanted to kind of just show everyone that, um,
(36:59):
don't you don't have to bring uh, negative emotions from
the past into the future. And knowing that we can
kind of shed some of that dead skin that we
had from previous seasons. UM, this was a big moment
for us to go into a new chapter, clean, refreshed
and um fully confident of us being a couple and
taking on the world together. And honestly, it was also
(37:22):
like what I was talking about earlier, Ben, it was
just showing people who we really are and not needing
to try to put on this front and try to
be someone we're not. We wanted to let people into fun,
little quirky things like having crystals and burning stage and
some people think it might be silly, but for us, UM,
that's a part of our life, of our life really
(37:43):
important one. Yeah, and we get to see that now
why and eu genitals is that like a thing? Is
you know, I'm not really sure. Okay, you know Todd.
Todd is a really good friend of mine. I mean
we've grown together closely over the last year, and uh,
you know, he knew that he had this role he
was very nervous. He tried to back out of it,
(38:03):
but we wanted him to do it. And Tod is
also one of the producers on the show, and he
was actually both of our producers individually and then and
then on Bachelor in Paradise, so he was a pivotal
part of our relationship. So I mean the direction of
how he was sieging the smoke and with the feather,
you know, for him, I think he just wasn't even thinking.
He was just trying to do it and get out
of there. So I wouldn't say this. I actually earlier
(38:27):
that day because he was so nervous, I was like, Todd,
come over, let me like practice on how you how
you like wiggle a brother disperse the smoke. So he
came over. I gave a whole tutorial. He was like good.
I was like, you know, this is a really serious roll.
I don't want to be a joke. This is you know, Miname.
Chris is like, this is this, you know, a ceremonial gesture,
(38:49):
like and this is an honor for you, so please
take it seriously. And then he walks out in flip
flops and then tell me Vohammad a short hell. You know, Todd,
he's just like like trying to be all like giddy
and dorky and we love him so much. But you
see me like, go to Chris, I got no laughing.
(39:12):
I didn't want to be a joke. I wanted it.
It was a very serious thing and it was our
wedding ceremony. It wasn't it. It wasn't a joke. But
turn out that way, I just gotta roll with the
punch sometimes. Oh yeah, it was great, it was really great.
I was just yeah, I'm glad you cleared it up
for me because I I've never seen that before, and
I thought, if anybody to be cleansing genitals, Todd is
(39:32):
the one to do it. Well. Is there anything else
that we saw we didn't see maybe in your wedding
in the ceremony portion, because we're gonna get into the
reception here in a second after we take a break.
Is there anything else in the wedding portion that you
want to mention to anybody out there listening. I mean,
I think one of the biggest moments, I mean, Ben,
(39:53):
you saw this was I wasn't wearing a mic um
right before Crystal was about to walk down the uh
you know audio came up to me and they're like,
you know, sound check and I'm like I don't even
have a mic on and they're like wow. They're like okay,
we gotta hold on a board a board and they're
like freaking out, and um, you know, it was just
funny because then we have Crystal waiting and she had
(40:14):
no idea what was going on. Then I was behind
that curtain for seven minutes by myself, and no one
was telling me what was going on. People just like
would walk up and like smile and give me a
thumbs up, and I'm like what, yeah, well, and I
all of a sudden hear everyone in the crowd like
laughing like louder louder louder, and I'm just like, I'm
(40:35):
so confused. Like the music stopped, um and that moment
I kind of started to freak out. And then ultimately
I just had to close my eyes like draw it
in and I did this like mini meditation, said like
twelve prayers, and ultimately I was able to like pull
into myself and have this incredible experience where I was
able to get so present, so focused, so elevated, um
(40:57):
energetically so that when I walked out, I just felt
like I was beaming this aura of love and I
felt just this ball of energy encompassing who I was
in that moment. And um, there was a really special
moment because I know, leading up to at the wedding,
when we were talking about it, everyone was asking me like,
who's gonna walk me down? And I brought up like,
(41:19):
I don't really know, Like I think I'm gonna go
by myself, and people were like, no, you shouldn't do that,
or why would you do that? And it was this
element where I already feel shame about it, but my
dad isn't really a figure in my life, neither is Chris's,
and that's actually what brought us together. And so for
me to make that take that step to um, you know,
(41:42):
make that walk alone, I realized that it was an
honor because I am self made and I was raised
by a single mom, but she was really not at
all in my life, and um, it was it was
a real honor for me to do that, um, and
I was really proud of myself. So it was a
really special moment. I think that's a point that maybe
I don't even realize, was you did walk yourself down
(42:04):
the aisle and that's a power that is a very special,
powerful moment. And you walked yourself up to Chris and
had an amazing, amazing celebration that Chris Harrison officiated. You
wrote your own vows for each other that were beautiful,
they were funny, they were unique, they were personal. And now,
Chris and Crystal um based on your story of what
(42:28):
brought you here. One of the most beautiful things about
you two is the story that you tell about the
life that you've lived up to this point. The story
that's brought you here is now on to celebrate your
husband and wife. And we're so excited to be celebrating
you now on this franchise. Um. You are a success
story and one that will be talked about for years
(42:49):
to come. Let's take a break, and I want to
talk about the drama though that ensued at your reception
that caused you both to leave a little early. Let's say, great,
you got it. For as beautiful as the wedding ceremony was,
(43:11):
I would say the reception was, uh, well, what would
you rate the reception on the skill of one to ten? Uh?
You know, I would say that the first half it
was about eight and a half, and then I would
say the second half was probably the one. I would say,
I say, I'm only given up point because we actually
(43:32):
left at that point. So but yeah, I mean that
that that's kind of how I would feel about it.
I mean, here's what it went down. A beautiful start,
great food, a really fun dance, some great talk speeches.
Everything seemed to be going like a normal reception does.
It was great, your family was there, and then all
of a sudden it did. There was a drastic shift
where it felt like, all of a sudden, the reception
(43:55):
was no longer the focus. You had Hannah or Hailey
and Analese and Ashley talking about Angela and how bright
and glowy she was walking out lout she was. It
made sense Tatian Analie are talking about Derek and JPJ.
Katie and JPJ are talking people, are you know, kind
of ragging on our our buddy Blake a little bit more.
(44:15):
All this stuff starts to get heated about midway throughout,
say an hour and a half into your reception, and
at that point I felt like there was no getting
it back. We actually Jessica and I left. Um I
bet we were literally on elevators, the two of you
and Jessica and I like side by side at the
same time, because it did feel like something was missing.
(44:36):
Was that I mean in the groom was gone, I
think for me and and if anybody's out there, they're like, Okay,
you give up some of the stuff with the TV wedding.
You understand that it sometimes you're gonna have a mic
issue and it's gonna have to pause and you're gonna
have to reset and do this, Like that's something you're
(44:56):
giving up to have a wedding in Mexico with your
family there so they can see all this go down
like that just happens, right, but there is And then
the reception, right, receptions are usually wild, their drama filled
most of the time in real life or on TV.
There's hook ups going on, there's crap tears like it's
that people are drinking, dancing, laughing, whatever. So I'm guess
(45:18):
I'm leaving your reception going. It just felt like a
little bit less than what I would experience in the
real world. Like it well, and I want to hear
if you agree, like you obviously left early, But it
did feel like all of a sudden you were gone.
We were gone, and I'm and we look back in
the room that everybody was like supposed to be in,
and it did it feel like everybody was in a
(45:39):
corner arguing, laughing, arguing or crying. Yeah, I will say
one thing that really stood out to me was that,
and then they didn't really show this too much, but
that they had invited multiple multiple um casts that were
not current cast or bridal party who were singles and
trying to get a chance to go down to Paradise. Yeah,
(46:02):
and so a lot of them came not for the
wedding per se, but to try to make a connection
to pursue someone to come back to Paradise. We're back
on to Paradise and Elise and Bibiana, I know we're there.
They had been kicked off Paradise. We're back at the
wedding looking to go back. Who were some of those
people that from past season that were down there kind
of looking to get onto Paradise. There was Um Brooks,
(46:25):
Jase McNary, Daniel Lombard, Uh, that girl Whitney Um, I
mean an Elie Um, Yeah, I mean there was there
was quite a bit. I'm trying to think of other ones,
but I mean those people were there too, and so
you had I mean, to be honest with you, it
kind of felt like a roast ceremony event. It seemed
(46:48):
like there was it seemed like there was panic. They
seemed like there was a lot of sadness. People were
scrambling because they thought that this was their chance to
go down to the island. Um. I remember people coming
up and asking like what should I do to try
to get on the show, And I'm thinking like, man,
this is my wedding, Like I can't be talking strategy
right now, this, this is not where my focus is.
That I felt deflated at that point. So it really did,
(47:09):
uh you know, in a weird way. It felt like
a roast ceremony. So people were actually asking you to
advice on how to get onto the show at your wedding. Yeah,
that's wild. Who I should who I should meet, who
I should hook up with? And I'm like, I don't.
I don't really know all the couples or the all
the all the situations that are going on right now,
and you know, it just it just for me. I
(47:30):
just I didn't anticipate that. I guess, m hmm. It
were you Okay, I mean, obviously the wedding was important
to you, like the ceremony, Were you willing to give
up the reception? But I mean, so here's here's where
this is coming from. I was in a car the
next morning heading to the airport with a bunch of
your family members and they were so thrilled with how
(47:52):
the whole thing went. So obviously the reception wasn't that
important to your family, like they really want to see
a beautiful wedding. So were you two going into it
willing to give up the reception kind of for the
sake of the show or was that something that you
really wanted. Honestly, we thought, I mean we spent I
mean a whole freaking playlist on Spotify of songs we
were going to play that not one was playing because
(48:15):
they couldn't play it because they were filming a show.
And so, I mean we thought it was gonna be
an actual party and it and it was in that
later half that was supposed to have been the DJ
and the floor dancing and you know, getting down, we
didn't have that element of it. So for me, I
think that's what we were most excited about. And we
were led to believe that that would be absolutely apart
(48:37):
of the ceremony or the reception, and it wasn't. But ultimately,
like we knew there was gonna be some kid, We
knew what there was gonna be some take And is
it worth the ceremony to not have the reception? Absolutely? Yeah.
The the ceremony was so beautiful, so gorgeous, everything we wanted.
And something you didn't see was the night before we
had our rehearsal dinner, which was just an incredible experience.
(48:58):
So ultimately our friends and failing us had a full
vacation that was I mean, it was awesome. It was
five star. So yeah, we didn't get that that second
half of the reception, and it was it was worth it.
I would say, I'm kind of thankful for the reception
because it allowed my friends and family, um to see
the element, uh that no one really sees, and that's
(49:21):
the show actually in full force taking place. And I
don't know if if Jessica can attest to this, but um,
it probably allows her to understand you more now when
you do talk about the show, and she can now
uh kind of be someone that you can confide in
when you do want to talk about the show because
she probably can be more understanding now, just as my
(49:42):
family and friends now, uh have allowed me to kind
of be more open about the show and have asked
me questions because now they understand and now they're not
judgmental or they're not confused, which has really kind of
helped my relationships with my boys as well, because they've
always tried but they couldn't really pinpoint or under stand,
and the same thing with my family. So in a
(50:02):
weird way, I am kind of thankful for for all
those things that took place at the reception because they
got to see it. Yeah, there's two things that Jessica
said to me after the wedding one, um, maybe three.
There's a lot of things. Actually, she said, uh, crystal beautiful,
what a great ceremony, those things, and then she was like,
I'm less intimidated. Was one thing. She said, Um, by
(50:22):
this world now, which is such a beautiful thing to hear.
She's like, for for so long, I've I've kind of
put the show up on a pedestal since I've met you,
and I've been intimidated by any person that's been on
the show. And I'm less intimidated now because I realized
everybody's like normal or just a little less than normal people. UM.
And then second is UM that she can relate with
(50:43):
me better, that she can understand more when I talk
about things. She knows me better because of that reception,
and because of the wildness that took place. UM, a
few less questions. I know we've got to get you
out of studio. UM, I really want to talk about
real quick, the Clay scenario with Angela. Angela was in
the wedding, she's a good friend of yours. At all,
did you feel bad about kind of setting I don't
(51:04):
I don't even say sitting clayics. I don't think you
set Clay up. You didn't even know he was really
gonna be there. Um, but what at all? Was there
a point in this that you felt bad for Clay
or was this kind of something that should just happen?
I mean, then we see Angela show up to the beach,
so obviously this was a scenario that was going to
happen somehow, some way. What were your thoughts, maybe he's
(51:24):
the best way to phrase this. On the Clay Angela
Nicole scenario during this time in Paradise. I mean, so
Clay is actually one of my really good friends. I'm
the one who got Clay and Angela together. Um, they're
both my good friends. And to believe it or not,
I was gonna have Clay view in my wedding and
that that kind of changed last minute because I didn't
(51:45):
want to have that situation and kind of you know,
take away from Crystal on her day. But the whole
dynamic is this is that you know the reason why
Clain Angela broke up is because Clay was in a
really tough spot, um with O t a s coming
up with the NFL and trying to get a tryout
and so what took places. They really had some deep
conversations and they were planning for the future. But Clay
(52:07):
takes care of his entire family, I mean down to
his grandma, down to his brother's financially and um, this
can be a burden on someone, especially when they have
the weight of all of that. And I think those
deep talks that they were having in the time that
they broke up, UM allowed him to open his eyes
and realize that right now, I need to figure out
myself first with what I can do moving forward from
(52:28):
my career in order to have these talks that I'm
having with Angela actually come to fruition. So in a way,
he didn't want to let Angela down, I think, and
and I understand from Angela's point of view two because
it is weird and it is shocking. However, though from that,
I would say that you know, Clay did the only
thing that he can do in that point in time,
and that was to let go, even though it hurts
(52:49):
both of them. And I think after a couple of
months went by, um, the whole career thing was now
taking a dramatic shift because I think at this point,
you know, the NFL has done for him, which is tough,
and I think for any man, especially who has put
so much work into to have that kind of slip
out of your hands, it's definitely definitely a shock and
it and it definitely affects who you are as a
(53:10):
man because then you have to figure out what's next.
And I think Bachelor Paradise was a way to get
away from this and and really be open to the
fact that knowing that he knows that it's over now,
maybe love can now be something that he can work
on and focus on because he can now kind of
um have it come back into his life. And and
(53:32):
what I think is the whole in the cold situation
is they get along great. I actually love them. I
think they were I think they were beautiful. And I
think that everything that we saw with Clan Angela is
exactly what we would have expected, um from the reception
or from the ceremony to the reception. And to be
honest with you, uh, I don't have any ill will
towards anything that took place with them, because I think
(53:53):
that this was important for them to have that talk.
I think that this was important for them to see
each other face to face because at the end of
the day, we're really going to now and see the
true answer if this is a couple that um is
someone that should be together, or if they should be
a part. Yeah, it's going to be a storyline we
want to follow in Paradise for sure. Yeah. Absolutely. And
I know I definitely was nervous and I spoke with
Angela prior to the wedding and I was like, I
(54:15):
know Clay's going to be there. We hear he's dating someone.
I really don't want this drama to take away from
the wedding. And she had really reassured me that she
was in a good place and you know, it would
it would be good. So we were so we knew
that we knew that going in, and we knew that
there was going to be an opportunity for them to
actually come together and talk since they had broken up,
(54:36):
and I think that that Angela was really needing some
closure on this relationship, so we wanted them to sit
down and have a conversation. So we were really supportive
of it. And we love Angela very deeply and we
love Clay and we both want them both to be
happy and to take the opportunity for them to explore
what they want. And I think that for Clay, what
(54:56):
is going to be really interesting that we're going to
see play out this season is I mean, he broke
up with Angela because he needs time to find out
who he is. What's his identity post football, which consumed
who he was and now he no longer has that,
So who is he now? And he needs to take
that time to to find himself and to create this
new life. And is he ready for a relationship or
(55:20):
does he still need to take take some time. That's
a good theme for the rest of Paradise. Is Clay
ready for relationship or does he need takes some time? Uh?
Chris and Crystal, thank you for sharing about your wedding
on this podcast. UM. What a wild season of Bachelor
in Paradise. We hope we can celebrate couples from this
(55:40):
season like we're able to celebrate YouTube you are, You're.
The words of wisdom that both of you shared are
things that UM, I'll take with me, UM that I'll
point other people too. I bet on this podcast for
years to come. When they are villains and they feel
like they've gotten a bad edit or whatever, I'll just say,
you need to talk to Chris and Crystal because, UM,
(56:01):
redemption does exist, but it has to exist within yourself first.
And I think those are words that I'm going to
take from listening to both of you. I'm so pumped
that I got to celebrate. Thank you for inviting Jessica
and I to the wedding. Thank you for allowing us
to be down there and on the prom Thank you,
um being at the Vedanta. Is there anything in your
lives right now that you'd like to share with our
listeners before we go? Yeah, I want to say the
work that Chris and I did have been doing on
(56:24):
ourselves has really evolved so much are who we are
as people as well as our relationship and then just
elevated us into such as beautiful transformation. And so I've
decided to now incorporate life coaching into my fitness coaching
to be working with women on empowering their mind, honoring
their bodies, and transforming their lives. So that's going to
(56:46):
be coming up really uh soon, and I cannot wait
to start just being um just speaking to women in
their heart because I think a lot of us just
feel unworthy and unhappy and we're really desperately seeking happiness.
But ultimately it's within ourselves and we all have the tools.
Sometimes we just need a coach to point us in
the right direction to bring that out within ourselves. So
(57:09):
coach Crystal dot com coming soon. Good for you guys. Hey, Uh,
thank you for sharing your wedding with us on TV.
Fans and listeners of this podcast have already started to
write in and just say how awesome it is to
see weddings on this show and celebrate the two of you. Uh, Chris,
you are the best doggie daddy I know. In Crystal
(57:32):
Um is that what you called him a doggy daddy
dog daddy, boys, I call him daddy. So yeah, we've
talked about that in this podcast. That's all heir about it.
Hey follow my league guys, thanks again for co hosting
with me today. Uh, actually we'll be back soon. Listeners
out there, the Almost Famous podcast is moving and grooving.
(57:54):
Make sure you tune in next week to another breakdown
of Bachelor in Paradise. With that I've Been Been and
I've than Crystal and I Been Christ followed the Bennon
Ashley I Almost Famous Podcast on iHeart Radio or subscribe
wherever you listen to podcasts
This is the Benn and Ashley I Almost Famous podcast
with I R Radio. Yo yo yo? Did that sound cool?
Is that pretty cool? Yo? Yo yo? Okay. Anyways, Hey,
it's been here. Ashley is making her way from the
East Coast back to the West Coast. She'll be joining
us very soon, and we'll be getting right back into
(00:21):
it together as co host. We still love each other,
We're still together. This podcast is bigger and better than ever.
She just had to take a little lover's break, but
as you heard from her here recently, as she recorded
in New York City, she's coming back soon with that.
We're gonna be bringing Chris and Crystal, who just got
married on last night's episode of Bachelor and Paradise into
(00:41):
studio today. There be co hosting a lot of this
show with me. But before we bring them in, I
want to break down a few things that are happening.
Last night's episode was um I would say, one of
the most entertaining episodes we've seen this season. UM entertaining
and and sometimes a not so fun way. Though. I
(01:05):
want to hear from Chris and Crystal about this, but
I have some very I would say, uh, concrete inconfident
thoughts on their wedding. I didn't love being at that
wedding and having people argue around me the whole time.
That wasn't fun for me to hear. Is actually so
bad that that Jesse and I actually got back to
(01:25):
our room after it was all and said and done,
and Jessica and I said, Wow, what a beautiful wedding,
but what a weird experience at times. I mean, there
was a moment, I'm telling you this, jess and I
were sitting literally sitting in the reception and there is
eight different groups of people arguing. There was multiple people
(01:47):
having tears, there was makeout sessions going on. This is
a wedding, this is a celebration, And finally jess and
I just said this is too much. We've got to go. Um. Yeah,
I want to hear from christ and Crystal beautiful wed
super pumped for them. I'm glad they're coming into studio,
but I'm sure there's some things that dell Field did
not go the way they wanted or maybe not. Maybe
they'll prove me wrong. But before they get in, I
(02:08):
want to break down a few things that are happening.
There's some main points from last night episode outside of
their wedding that we need to talk about. J p
J is on one. The guy is fired up because
he now loves Tasha, and I think for me and
I want to hear from you please emails at been
A Ashley. I heart media dot com or uh use
(02:29):
Twitter and hashtag almost Famous podcast. I can't quite understand
where his love suddenly blossomed for Tassia. I think I
would be feeling this way and feeling for him if
up to this point I had ever seen a sign
that he was super invitation. I know he had said
and mentioned it, but then he goes on these two
(02:49):
dates because Tasha kind of told him to. But these
two dates, it wasn't like he was holding back. It
wasn't like he was thinking about Tasha on both of
these dates. I felt like he was entering into new
relationships with new great people. I know. I know the
Ferguson twins well, they were on our season of the Bachelor,
and Haley Ferguson is a tremendous, tremendous catch. I think
(03:13):
as her sister has now found uh somebody that she loves,
Haley is starting to venture out as well. I see
JPJ go on this date with her, and the only
thing I can think about is this relationship could work.
It could literally work. They're they're very similar people. Um,
they vote. They both are very fun to be around. Uh.
They both are intelligent, even though sometimes when you watch
(03:36):
them you go they a character of themselves, But when
you talk to him, they both have really really good thoughts.
They process things well. But all of a sudden, we
see this whole new JPJ come into play. This j
p J is mad at Derek because Derek is now
into Tatia. And maybe I'm wrong here, maybe I'm alone.
(03:57):
Please tell me if I am. But I'm celebrating Derek
like it's a good thing. He moved, he handled them
the situation well, he didn't give up on the pursuit
of love. He said, I'm gonna stay in this thing.
And then all of a sudden, before his eyes is
his beautiful momentation. Derek says, I'm gonna go after because
she's interested in me as well. I don't think he
did anything wrong, and I want to know what J
(04:17):
p J thought he was doing wrong. We have Tori
in studio with me right now, before we bring Chris
and Crystaline, I gotta get Tori's opinion. What did JPJ
actually feel like Derek was doing wrong and did Derek
do anything wrong? It sounds like the classic he's not
here for the right reasons scenario, and he saw Derek
(04:40):
talked about his podcast too much where he thought, oh,
he just wants to get more content. I mean, trust me,
I'm all for they gave me content. Well, I also
feel like what Derek was saying was no, I was
doing that as it's really cool to opportunities we have
available to us after the show, like after going on,
we do have a podcast we can have opportunities with
(05:01):
and I do want you to come on and chat
about Bachelor in Paradise. So I feel like it was
kind of just work talk. But then JPJ took advantage
of that and manipulated it kind of to make it
seem like, see, Derek's here for the wrong reasons. It's
interesting there's a comment that was made by JPJ says, um,
(05:22):
Derek is on this show and using his bachelor profile
to hook up with girls. Uh, And that's one of
So there's a few things that JPJ has said the
Derek is doing wrong. One he's using the Paradise Show
to enhance his podcast content. Um, the next is uh
that he is using his bachelor fame took up with girls,
(05:44):
and then also he is deceiving everybody in the process.
I think it's a viewer. It's hard. I haven't seen
that yet, and I don't know if many people had,
Like even the people that were on the beach with
Derek were confused by j what JPJ was upset at about.
We saw at the wedding. I understood at the wedding.
I saw him getting mad at Derek at the wedding,
and everybody's like, I don't know what's going on. I
(06:07):
think this is maybe, let's say, in the Most Beautiful Sins,
JPJ really does love Tasha and he's losing his mind
because Tatia is slipping through the cracks. Do you believe
in love at first sight? Yeah, sure, because I swear
this is what happened to him. I don't know. I
don't think. I don't think he loved Tashia as much
(06:29):
until until Derek started Like in Tasia, no, because he
pursued her beforehand and then Tatia said, hey, seek out
other options, and then he went on a date with
Haley and Tajwan. It's all of a sudden become one
of the most dramatic storylines that we're seeing in Paradise.
I am interesting see how it plays out. I want
JPJ to pull it back together. I like the JPJ
(06:51):
that doesn't have to be goofy all the time. He
doesn't have to make everybody laugh all the time. He
doesn't need to gag after everything he puts down his
throat because that seems to be something he's doing. But
JPJ that just lifts people up. The joyful JPJ that
is confident in himself, loving, caring, fun, exciting, and and
very secure in who he is. I don't like the
JPJ im seeing. I want JPG to come back to
(07:14):
normal because I think if he does, my prediction is
if JPJ can wrap this up and get his head
back and right him and take you could actually make
things work. Do you know what I didn't like how
he kept interrupting Derek and wouldn't let him speak. It happens.
It was weird. It was monologue. It was it was weird.
Derek was very calm and collected, and J like I said,
(07:35):
I've never seen a freak out like that. Even on
this show, like it was a uniquely dramatic freak out
that had no sensibility to it. We can oftentimes to
the show. I'm gonna go back to some of the
most villainous people we've ever had in the show. I'm
not gonna mention their names because some of them don't
deserve to have their names mentioned on this podcast. But
sometimes they're arguing things and you're like, oh, that kind
(07:56):
of makes sense. Like, yeah, it's wrong and it's aggressive
and you're not saying the right things, but like, it
kind of makes sense. This one didn't make sense to me.
It was a lot of talking, very little conversation, and
it completely lacked any sensibility. Derek couldn't even a word out.
I don't know what happened to JPG. I wanted I
(08:16):
want jp J to sit down on this podcast at
some point and tell us what happened. Because it was
a breakdown of all breakdowns. This one we'll go back on,
I think and watch years to come. Hey, uh, Chris
and Crystal are getting warmed up. They're getting a vocal
chords ready. We're gonna break down their wedding with him
all the good, bad, ugly, and excitement that came from it.
But before do, let's take a break to talk about
(08:37):
one of our favorite sponsors. Bachelor in Paradise this year
has not missed its drama. We talked to Wells last
week and we both were feeling like the drama is
out kind of weighing the love right now. I do
(08:58):
think we're taking a hearn, but we're getting pretty far
in the season. There's a few couples that were celebrating
right now. I know that we feel pretty confident in
Hannah and Dylan. Finally, UM, Blake is still out there
pursuing love the best of his abilities. Um. I think
we've seen successful couples kind of blossom late in the show,
(09:23):
but at this point, I feel like, tell me if
I'm wrong. We're getting a little late in the game
to really be cheering for any of these couples like
we want to. I mean, I'm I'm thinking back to
the Astroids and Kevin's. Um, I'm thinking back to the
Joe and Kindle's. I'm thinking back to the Tanner in Jades.
(09:44):
I think the closest thing we have to that right
now is is honestly Hannah and Dylan and their their
journey has not been perfect. I don't know if we
we necessarily expect it to be. But even after this episode,
and we'll get into it later, the Clay and the
Coals are even breaking up, it feels like, I mean,
(10:07):
we see Kalen heartbroken during the wedding because of Deaners,
but we also see Connor step in as maybe the hero.
These are all things we want to tease to talk
about later in the podcast, but quite honestly, I believe this.
It's been a great season. It's been fun to watch,
(10:28):
it's been at times hard to watch. But there are
very few couples that I am fully behind other than
Hannah and Dylan. And that's sad to me because I
think a lot of them are on their edge. I
think that I don't think they're gonna make it, really,
mark my words, I don't think. I think Hannah and
Dylan make it, and I think a lot of the
other ones that we're watching right now, I think it
(10:51):
gets it's it's not looking good. Christian and DEMI I think,
oh yeah, Christian, DEMI will make it. I kind of
like feel like that's like, uh, like I don't know
if this makes it. I feel like they're like above
paradise now, Like it's almost like you, of course they're
gonna make it like it just feels like it's such
a good and healthy and positive thing. I don't know
why I watched this down like they are a paradise couple,
(11:13):
but they feel like so much more than a paradise couple,
Like they're out of the dramas, like there's not a
lot outside of their own relationship that could blow up
in their face. Side note, did you see how jess
had a little cameo and the cocktail? Um, Yeah, it's funny.
I I watched it before Jessica did, and I said, Jessica,
(11:34):
you had a really good moment during this show. You're
talking to Clay and I was back in an interview
and she was introducing herself to some of the people
that are at the wedding, and I remember I came
out and then I felt so awkward. I don't know
any of these people. When I was just like spinning
in circles trying to like everybody's trying to mingle with
each other and meet each other. And then we get
to see it on national television where Jessica is talking
(11:55):
to Clay. There's like an argument or somebody or some
girls trying to flirt with Clay, and she comes up
in could just like stands there, smiles and like spencing
circles like I don't want to go, but this this
is a crazy part of this And I think I
mentioned it a few weeks ago on the podcast. I
was at this wedding as well, and in this batch
the world, I've been in it for a long time, right,
I mean, I don't know a lot of these new people,
(12:15):
so I was excited to meet them. But I would
say I'm a veteran, like there's not many from the
many things on this show that is gonna throw me off,
but I'm There's two scenarios. One, I'm sitting uh at
the wedding and I look behind me and there's Connor.
I said, Connor, Ben, nice to finally meet you, and
(12:38):
he's like, oh man, He's like, I want to talk
to you right now, but I'm gonna go talk to
that girl, and just like yes. Second one, Mike, they
well Mike, I'm talking to him and he goes, Dude,
I want to talk to you right now, but I
got to go talk to this girl. Two different occasions.
I got completely ignored, dumped, walked past because I was
(13:00):
at that point I realized I was in the middle
of a television show. I was just hanging out like
I was at a wedding. My final point before we
take one last break before we bring Chris and crystalland
I know they're they're warmed up there. Listen to this.
This is crazy. We met Connor, really tall, good looking dude,
right Hannaby season Hannaby season. We see him come into
(13:21):
the episode at the end this time, and I'm like, Connor,
you've been on the show, Like, are you down on
the beach? I didn't know who was there and who wasn't.
He goes, no, man, I've been in my hotel room
for the last ten days. It's a hotel room, lest
in days. Why because I don't know. He literally came
down to Paradise and he was just chilling until the
beach opened up to have one more man walk in.
(13:43):
Based on how people were going home coming and going,
there wasn't room for another man, so he had to
literally sit in his hotel room. Is that how it works?
You just sit in the hotel room. I guess I've
never been on paradise? Is that wild? Like being in jail?
Poor poor guy? All right, hey, um, let's take one
more break and then we're gonna bring on Chris and
(14:03):
Crystal Live to talk about their beautiful wedding that was
a celebration of all sorts of love, of a commitment
to each other, but also at its own drama. Let's
take a break, all right, Welcome back, hot Chris and
Chris or in studio. Hello, Chris and Crystal? What's going on? Man?
(14:27):
How are you doing? Man? You guys are glowing, trying, man, trying,
you know how it is? Looking good, looking really good.
All right. So we've been talking leading up to getting
you both in the studio about kind of everything leading
up to your wedding, and so we broke all that down.
Now I want to talk about your wedding. Um, first off,
(14:49):
let's start at the beginning. Why did you want to
do your wedding on television? Uh? So this was actually
a long process for Sloani. Uh. Months of talking, months
of negotiations, and um, you know, weighing the pros and
the cons. We knew that doing a televised wedding, UH
(15:10):
would have some risks because we knew that, you know,
not everything could be perfect when it comes to reality TV. However, though,
we thought of all the positives, and some of those
being getting married at a place where we first met
for the first time ever, had our first conversation first
I Love you, first date, and it was very symbolic
for us because we would be able to bring a
(15:31):
new element into that and that was our friends and
family to watch this chapter of love that has evolved
over the last year really come to fruition in front
of their eyes at the place where we met. And
I think it was also a thank you to the
franchise because uh, without all of this, we would have
never found each other. And so I think that really
(15:52):
all played into the decision making that allowed us to
move forward and go ahead with the decision of having
to televised wedding. Yeah, I think that was really well put.
I will say that as we were going through this
wedding planning process, a lot of fear from our past
seasons really started to come back to the surface, and
for us, I was just exposing just some areas we
(16:14):
were still hurt um and ultimately like as we got
closer to the wedding and kind of making that decision.
We ultimately had to decide that these wounds were areas
that we were gonna not let us, let us, you know,
be defined by them, and and instead shoes to step
forward into the future and become better. But it was
(16:34):
areas where we said that this actually requires real work.
What was those things? Like? What are things are you
speaking about? You know I'm talking about Like when I
was on The Bachelor and feeling I just felt so
afraid to be myself, and I think I was so
as I went through that process. I was so scared
of showing people who I really was, that I wouldn't
(16:55):
be accepted, I wouldn't be loved. And a lot of
that trails way back to my child of you know,
being on welfare and government assistance and my dad not
being in the picture and not letting kids at school
know that because they would tease me and make fun
of me, and so kind of carrying this image. And
I realized that I'd been doing that my whole life.
(17:15):
And when I went on The Bachelor and watched it
back and went through all that scrutiny um and getting
this fill and edit, I mean, really, that's that's who
I was, and so just becoming confident in who I am,
the woman I am today and owning my truth and
unapologetically but lovingly being me was a journey to get through.
(17:38):
I want to sit here for a second, Crystal, with you,
because I think this is an interesting point that oftentimes
we can't answer on this podcast. Um, I want to
start one and remind everybody that when Crystal was on
the Bachelor, your journey was not easy. It was not
one that I would say you probably walked out of
it feeling the most love. But you came on Paradise
and it was a completely it was a complete redemption story. Right.
(18:02):
So here's my question for you as somebody and you're
not anymore, You're not viewed this way. You are loved,
you're celebrated. Obviously, you just had a wedding on national television.
I can't wait to continue to talk about it. But
you were the villain after your season you went down
to Paradise, known as the villain. For anybody that comes
on this show and maybe doesn't know themselves fully and
(18:26):
isn't it doesn't have the greatest time on the show,
they don't represent themselves well, or they watch it back
in the Wow, I didn't realize I was such a
jerk or such a egomaniac or whatever. What would be
your advice for them to have their redemption story? How
do you then kind of turn the table? And then
also my follow up to this, and I want you
(18:48):
to because what does it feel like to be completely
love now when at one time you felt isolated from
this world? Yeah, I'd say, um, right now, they're there's
still every now and then that little voice that just
kind of doubts, like am I enough? Like do people
like am I? Am I good enough to get this love?
And and do I feel worthy enough to receive this?
(19:09):
And I do? And it becomes this like daily practice
of reminding myself that it's not about other people validating
me to be happy, to feel worthy. It's about loving
myself and just owning that and embracing that and knowing
that all those hard times that I went through weren't
anything to be ashamed of because they actually gave me
my strength and they defined who I am today. And
(19:31):
I think just honestly, my relationship with Chris is what
really gave me that confidence. Because there was a moment
on the beach when we were in the pool like
day two and he's like, you're a businesswoman. And I never,
even though I had a business, I had never viewed
myself as this entrepreneur, as this businesswoman. And I was like, wow, like,
you see something in me that I couldn't even see
(19:52):
for myself. And I think that's why our our relationship
has evolved, and that's why we got married, is because
we bring out these sides in each other that maybe
at one point we didn't feel worthy. We couldn't see it. Um,
but we're continuously devoted to growing and pushing each other
to really demand more of ourselves and um, and you know,
(20:13):
we're just being surrendering to love. Really. As as great
as that sounds, I think I think one thing that
we don't ever really focus on is how this show,
for those of us who go on it, it's kind
of like a blueprint. And what I mean by that
is is you might have not the best of journeys
going on this show, Um, but that was you in
(20:35):
the moment. A lot of people go on the show
and they blame producers, they blame edits and but at
the end of the day, it was your behavior. And
whether that's ever happened to you before or it just
finally came out. Those were hitting qualities or characteristics that
you saw that you didn't like about yourself. So instead
of deflecting, uh those situations, it's better to uh look
(20:55):
at it in a way of taking full ownership and
embracing it. And what I mean by that is is
use that as fuel to understand that there are things
that are deep in hit and that this show can
bring out. But it's a good thing because that is
a time where you can work on yourself and have
self development and work on a new blueprint for yourself
(21:15):
to become a higher, better version of who you are. Yeah,
that's awesome. And my my advice, going back to your question, Ben,
would be when I was on The Bachelor, there was
a moment where I was blaming and I was pointing
the finger, and then ultimately I realized, hey, I'm a coach,
Like how I grow is through feedback, is through constructive feedback.
So then I started going on Instagram and then I
(21:37):
started reading all the comments and sifting through the messages,
and there was a lot of death threats. There was
a lot of really angry things, but there was also
like nuggets of love and intention and admiration that people had,
and I chose to read those without getting myself involved
in that emotion and instead chose to see see it
as feedback. And it was if someone kept continuously saying
(21:57):
the same thing, then that was obviously like something that
I needed to look at within myself and grow. So
no that particularly we're speaking about Blake. You know, hard
times I'll have to define you. You can grow and
become better as we did, and I really hope that.
And that's another reason why I think we decided to
get married was because we went through this journey of
(22:20):
into the dark but came out because we were together,
because we leaned into this franchise, and because we just
we just surrendered the expectations and just step into who
we were. And I wanted that to be an inspiration
story of that would inspire others that you know, you
can become anybody you want. You deserve anything that you know,
(22:41):
you deserve happiness and love, but you got to do
some work to do it and to get there. What
I want to sit here for a second, because Chris
and Crystal, you've just said something that's never been said
in the two years plus that we've been doing this podcast,
I've never and I want to tell you, anybody out
there listening who has listened for a while will know that.
(23:02):
I think they're probably screaming, like saying, oh my gosh,
this is what Ben has been begging for. But we've
never had a villain air quotes come onto this show
and ever say take ownership in your actions because if
you do, you'll be a better person for it. Chris,
you said it. It's it's you're brilliant and I'm learning
from you. I'm just gonna repeat what you said. You said,
(23:25):
don't deflect what you're seeing. Instead use it as growth,
and when you do that, people respond. We connect through
our our vulnerability, we connect through our weaknesses. And I'm
literally just repeating what you said. So this isn't my
own thoughts here, But what I want to say is
I want to remind the listeners that what has happened
here and what the beauty of this show is, it
(23:45):
does bring out things that we don't always see, and
when you use those as fuel to better yourself, amazing
things can happen. Like these two guys. I'm telling you,
we've never had that nobody's ever done that, and it's
and it is. It is such a breath of fresh
air for me. I've been waiting for that. So with that,
(24:07):
you guys are really smart people with great advice here,
I want you to tag team this. If Blake Blake
does listen to the podcast, Blake's gonna hear this. What
is your advice to Blake right now? Um? I think
my biggest advice would be to really process this, don't
act out of emotion. Uh know that not everyone's perfect.
(24:31):
And I think the biggest thing is that it's it's
so hard to take ownership because we know the truth
about ourselves and we don't want the truth to to
come to to come to life because we know that
we'll be judged. But this is a moment where coming
to truth will set you free from the bondage that
you're that that's holding you back. Because the longer you
(24:51):
continue to hold onto that bondage and you know you
can't break through, breakthrough, you'll just continue to have these issues,
to have these demons over you. And So for Blake,
I mean, he's a great friend of mine. I love him,
and I don't my perception doesn't change of him. However, though,
I do want to rally behind him because I know
that this will be a great stepping stone for Blake
(25:11):
to become even a better man than he previous was
through this journey on the franchise. So I would say
to Blake, don't worry about what people are saying. I
know that you've done what you've done. These actions were
done from you, no matter if there was an excuse
or reason. But just know that this is not what's
going to define you. What's going to define you is
(25:31):
how you respond and how you react in the action
that you take moving forward. I expect to get preached
to today, but come on, Chris, Yeah, that was good.
I'm going to go into UM. I think my advice
as a life and fitness coach to Blake would be
to shut off the phone and make sure you're taking
time every data to better yourself. And you know, I
(25:54):
know people are saying a lot of things and a
lot of opinions about him, but he can't listen to that,
you know, he can't find his worthiness and what other
people are saying. And what I have found to be
most transformative for myself and for my clients is setting
aside time every morning and just waking up with purpose
in a plan that is solely focused on on developing you.
(26:15):
So I love waking up and drinking my lemon water,
pulling out my pen and my journal, and just writing
out whatever is going on in my mind. And I
think for Blake it might be easy to blame things,
but just writing these letters just to get out the
emotions that could be consuming him in his head. And
exactly that Chris said, just kind of reacting out of
emotion and um, a lot of fear that I'm sure
(26:37):
he has right now is going to really help him
get that clarity on the steps that he needs to
take to move forward, because he's got the answers, he
knows what to do. Sometimes we just give other people
that power, but it's until we begin to look within
and understand it's it's not about what's out there, it's
about what's within me. Yeah. Seek uh internally, not externally,
because no one knows what's best for Blake on the
(27:00):
inside besides Blake. And so Blake needs to shut everything
down and listen to himself on the inside and that
will allow him to begin this new path of moving forward.
And when in doubt, Blake. Just watch my season of
the Bachelor and that that doesn't have to define you.
(27:20):
You can move on in a happy, healthy way with
a beautiful wedding. Hey, guys, I really want to talk
about your wedding. I want to celebrate this wedding. I
want to talk about how beautiful it was. I also
want to talk about any of the behind the scenes
things that maybe we didn't see that you were both
feeling um. But I want to break that down in total.
So before we do that, let's take one more break.
We'll get back talking about Chris and Crystal's beautiful wedding.
(27:51):
All right, we got Chris and Crystal in the studio,
whose wedding we just watched on Bachelor in Paradise. Chris
and Crystal, I need you to lead me through this.
I was not, uh, the ones planning your reading. I
had the opportunity to be there with my girlfriend Jessica
uh and it was a beautiful wedding from our perspective.
But the things you didn't see. I want to walk
into this because I did see this part. We all
(28:13):
walk into this event venue. It's a beautiful place at
the Vedanta in Portavarto. Mexico, and we don't really know
what's going to go on though, right, Jessica and I
are going for your wedding. That is our purpose of
being there. We don't know anything else. At this point.
We flew down for Chris and Crystal's wedding. We go
to a cocktailer that we've been invited to, and at
this cocktail we're meeting Chris and Crystal's family, a couple
(28:35):
of other people who are already there from Bachelor Nation
that came down kind of with us that we had
met at the pool earlier. And then the cast shows up.
I mean literally they walked down this like venue space
towards us like a herd of animals, and everybody's heads
turned and we all go, what is happening? We didn't
(28:55):
realize I saw your guys reaction, No idea that you
are so surprised. We had no clue. I had no idea.
But all of a sudden, the show literally came to us,
and like, not when this happens, right, That's what I'm
gonna say. It's not just the cast that comes, it's
the cameramen that come it with them, and it's a
(29:19):
huge group of people coming charging towards the wedding. They
come down, all looking fresh, all looking it's super happy
to be there. You know. The one thing they didn't
see on the show was everybody that got to the wedding.
We're like, we're so glad to be out of the house.
We're like feel like we're you know, it feels like
a different world that we've not entered into together. We
feel like we've gone back into the real world for
a bit. They're super excited to be there to celebrate
(29:39):
you all and to actually get a breath of fresh
air and air conditioning and air conditioning. And very quickly,
and I don't know if how men you watch it
last night on the show, very quickly realized that the
show really did come to us. And this is the
part that all of a sudden, Jessica and I both
started to feel weird about, because there's arguing, there was
mingling of relation and ships, there was new people coming
(30:01):
in during you know, the cocktail hour, and Jessica very
quickly looked at me and she goes, word, this is
the show. Is like, this is like definitely about the
show right now, right And I said it did, and
we she started to get upset for you too, But
I will say it turned quickly once we walked into
the ceremony because at that moment it really was about YouTube.
It was a beautiful wedding that I want you tube
(30:23):
down kind of lead me through because we were nervous
the cocktail hour, felt like it wasn't gonna be this,
but then all of a sudden, it all changed. It
was a drastic shift, and your wedding was a wedding
to be remembered. Um was it everything you hoped it
would be? And it's a tough question that to to
answer because in a sense it is, but in a
(30:44):
sense it isn't. Um. I gotta be honest because obviously
we knew, Um, there could be some elements thrown into
the mix of our wedding, and we knew that there
were risks. Um did we know the whole cast was
gonna come not untill about a dared too before the wedding. Um,
we thought we were going to be possibly giving out
a day card to one couple to come down. So
(31:06):
it was definitely a surprise factor, and we knew that
there could be some some situations taking place. Knowing that
that amount of people with that level of drama going on,
um could interfere, but there were a lot of positives.
I mean, Crystal looked absolutely beautiful. Um. I almost fainted
when she literally was walking down the aisle because I
felt such such an array of emotions. And you know,
(31:28):
it was a breakthrough for me to know that I
was marrying my my life partner, my best friend, and
uh my family right there, my mom front row just
crying and being so happy for me. And these are
emotions and these are memories that will stick with me forever.
And UM, I'm extremely grateful and blessed absolutely um. And
so for that, I am thankful. UM. And I think
(31:51):
this was actually everything that I envisioned, and we did
get what we wanted out of this and and I think, uh,
I think for me personally, that five percent will dessipate
soon enough. UM, you know, because it's just short term.
It's not long term. Everything that's sticking with me is
all the beautiful memories, not the not the little bit
of drauma that that occurred. Yeah, I would say that, Um,
(32:12):
we knew going in that it was going to be
incorporated into an episode, not be a standalone episode, So
it wasn't going to be just about our wedding, and
we knew that there was going to be some cast
that were that would be coming in, and ultimately we
kind of looked each other and we said, well, we're
always down for an adventure. Let's let's say then. And
what was important, the most important thing and the most
(32:33):
special thing for us, especially for me, was that we
got to bring our our family and our close friends
onto the show and have them see what it's like
to actually be a part of this franchise because there's
a little, as you know, it's a little bit of
a disconnect. I'm sure there was like that with Jessica
um As. We had talked about that she doesn't really
know the world, so it's hard for her to comprehend
and grasp like what goes on. So we were really
(32:55):
excited for that element of it. And I would say
everything was perfect up until we were in the reception,
and it was at that point it did feel very
much not about us produced. And there was an element
where Chris and I were standing there and the room
was totally empty and all the castles in their little
corner for filming, and I all of a sudden looked
(33:18):
around and like my microphone was off and no cameras
were honest, and We're like staying there alone, and I
was like, this isn't even about us. Let's go, let's
get out of here. I mean, at the end of
the day, we we left. We left the reception early.
We did. We did. Yeah, and my my friends while
my room has been actually ended up staying there toil
(33:40):
production shut down. But I think Crystal made a great point.
It's just in that moment um, as happy as we were,
we did feel uh a little bit down knowing that
the night wasn't over yet, and we just felt like
the night ended sooner than maybe it should have. Yeah,
the I want to back check because the reception is
(34:02):
something that we just have to talk about. It was wild.
I have so many thoughts on that. Your wedding, though,
will be remembered. It was beautiful, it was a celebration. Um. Yes,
I think watching it on television, there was moments that
felt a little weird, like when Angela walks down the
aisle and Clay is looking there like he's fearful, and well,
you know, I remember we were sitting right across from him,
(34:25):
and I had known the scenario and how it was
going to present itself. And I was watching his face
as she walked down, and I remember when I was
in person, I tapped Jessica was like, that is wild,
Like I know they captured that and watching it back
is going to be rough. It wasn so many photos
about like a screenshot of that. It was Oh my god.
(34:46):
It was um. But your wedding was beautiful, Crystal. You
looked absolutely gorgeous. I'm sure you've been told that a
thousand times. I think you should be told that a
thousand times, a thousand times more. Uh. Chris said it,
he was fainted. You look so good you did. You
looked absolutely beautiful. But I do have to ask, what
(35:09):
in the world is this smudge pot cleansing? And why
were they doing on your genitals? Well, so, um, if
you watched Paradise when Chris and I were on and
where we met, I mean, part of who I am
is I love crystals and I love sage and a
(35:29):
lot of that comes down to energy. And I smudge
daily as part of my morning routine that I recommend
like to do. And uh, what sage does. It removes
negative energy and it just cleans the room and it
allows you to just kind of wash away any any
negativity of the past. It allows you to clean slate.
And I felt that was really symbolic for christ and
(35:50):
I because we wanted to let go of who we were,
of the past, of that of that those hard times,
never forget, but let go of about that trauma, any
of that negativity that we had been prior to now
moving forward as a married couple. So we really wanted
to come into this marriage just clean, cleansed, and new. Yeah,
(36:13):
I think it was very symbolic for us, UH, because
we're very into UH in tune with one another and
when it comes to our energies. This is one of
the biggest breakthroughs we've had in our relationship is that, UM,
we can feed off and understand each other's energy and
and someone doesn't even have to say something. And being
in tune like that allows you to communicate more effectively UM.
(36:36):
And it allows us to not bottle up emotions UM.
And it also helps us identify things within ourselves that
UM we're able to work on rather than not being
able to identify and to to to continue going down
a path of UM not becoming better day in and
day out. So UH this much ceremony. It was our choice,
and we just wanted to kind of just show everyone that, um,
(36:59):
don't you don't have to bring uh, negative emotions from
the past into the future. And knowing that we can
kind of shed some of that dead skin that we
had from previous seasons. UM, this was a big moment
for us to go into a new chapter, clean, refreshed
and um fully confident of us being a couple and
taking on the world together. And honestly, it was also
(37:22):
like what I was talking about earlier, Ben, it was
just showing people who we really are and not needing
to try to put on this front and try to
be someone we're not. We wanted to let people into fun,
little quirky things like having crystals and burning stage and
some people think it might be silly, but for us, UM,
that's a part of our life, of our life really
(37:43):
important one. Yeah, and we get to see that now
why and eu genitals is that like a thing? Is
you know, I'm not really sure. Okay, you know Todd.
Todd is a really good friend of mine. I mean
we've grown together closely over the last year, and uh,
you know, he knew that he had this role he
was very nervous. He tried to back out of it,
(38:03):
but we wanted him to do it. And Tod is
also one of the producers on the show, and he
was actually both of our producers individually and then and
then on Bachelor in Paradise, so he was a pivotal
part of our relationship. So I mean the direction of
how he was sieging the smoke and with the feather,
you know, for him, I think he just wasn't even thinking.
He was just trying to do it and get out
of there. So I wouldn't say this. I actually earlier
(38:27):
that day because he was so nervous, I was like, Todd,
come over, let me like practice on how you how
you like wiggle a brother disperse the smoke. So he
came over. I gave a whole tutorial. He was like good.
I was like, you know, this is a really serious roll.
I don't want to be a joke. This is you know, Miname.
Chris is like, this is this, you know, a ceremonial gesture,
(38:49):
like and this is an honor for you, so please
take it seriously. And then he walks out in flip
flops and then tell me Vohammad a short hell. You know, Todd,
he's just like like trying to be all like giddy
and dorky and we love him so much. But you
see me like, go to Chris, I got no laughing.
(39:12):
I didn't want to be a joke. I wanted it.
It was a very serious thing and it was our
wedding ceremony. It wasn't it. It wasn't a joke. But
turn out that way, I just gotta roll with the
punch sometimes. Oh yeah, it was great, it was really great.
I was just yeah, I'm glad you cleared it up
for me because I I've never seen that before, and
I thought, if anybody to be cleansing genitals, Todd is
(39:32):
the one to do it. Well. Is there anything else
that we saw we didn't see maybe in your wedding
in the ceremony portion, because we're gonna get into the
reception here in a second after we take a break.
Is there anything else in the wedding portion that you
want to mention to anybody out there listening. I mean,
I think one of the biggest moments, I mean, Ben,
(39:53):
you saw this was I wasn't wearing a mic um
right before Crystal was about to walk down the uh
you know audio came up to me and they're like,
you know, sound check and I'm like I don't even
have a mic on and they're like wow. They're like okay,
we gotta hold on a board a board and they're
like freaking out, and um, you know, it was just
funny because then we have Crystal waiting and she had
(40:14):
no idea what was going on. Then I was behind
that curtain for seven minutes by myself, and no one
was telling me what was going on. People just like
would walk up and like smile and give me a
thumbs up, and I'm like what, yeah, well, and I
all of a sudden hear everyone in the crowd like
laughing like louder louder louder, and I'm just like, I'm
(40:35):
so confused. Like the music stopped, um and that moment
I kind of started to freak out. And then ultimately
I just had to close my eyes like draw it
in and I did this like mini meditation, said like
twelve prayers, and ultimately I was able to like pull
into myself and have this incredible experience where I was
able to get so present, so focused, so elevated, um
(40:57):
energetically so that when I walked out, I just felt
like I was beaming this aura of love and I
felt just this ball of energy encompassing who I was
in that moment. And um, there was a really special
moment because I know, leading up to at the wedding,
when we were talking about it, everyone was asking me like,
who's gonna walk me down? And I brought up like,
(41:19):
I don't really know, Like I think I'm gonna go
by myself, and people were like, no, you shouldn't do that,
or why would you do that? And it was this
element where I already feel shame about it, but my
dad isn't really a figure in my life, neither is Chris's,
and that's actually what brought us together. And so for
me to make that take that step to um, you know,
(41:42):
make that walk alone, I realized that it was an
honor because I am self made and I was raised
by a single mom, but she was really not at
all in my life, and um, it was it was
a real honor for me to do that, um, and
I was really proud of myself. So it was a
really special moment. I think that's a point that maybe
I don't even realize, was you did walk yourself down
(42:04):
the aisle and that's a power that is a very special,
powerful moment. And you walked yourself up to Chris and
had an amazing, amazing celebration that Chris Harrison officiated. You
wrote your own vows for each other that were beautiful,
they were funny, they were unique, they were personal. And now,
Chris and Crystal um based on your story of what
(42:28):
brought you here. One of the most beautiful things about
you two is the story that you tell about the
life that you've lived up to this point. The story
that's brought you here is now on to celebrate your
husband and wife. And we're so excited to be celebrating
you now on this franchise. Um. You are a success
story and one that will be talked about for years
(42:49):
to come. Let's take a break, and I want to
talk about the drama though that ensued at your reception
that caused you both to leave a little early. Let's say, great,
you got it. For as beautiful as the wedding ceremony was,
(43:11):
I would say the reception was, uh, well, what would
you rate the reception on the skill of one to ten? Uh?
You know, I would say that the first half it
was about eight and a half, and then I would
say the second half was probably the one. I would say,
I say, I'm only given up point because we actually
(43:32):
left at that point. So but yeah, I mean that
that that's kind of how I would feel about it.
I mean, here's what it went down. A beautiful start,
great food, a really fun dance, some great talk speeches.
Everything seemed to be going like a normal reception does.
It was great, your family was there, and then all
of a sudden it did. There was a drastic shift
where it felt like, all of a sudden, the reception
(43:55):
was no longer the focus. You had Hannah or Hailey
and Analese and Ashley talking about Angela and how bright
and glowy she was walking out lout she was. It
made sense Tatian Analie are talking about Derek and JPJ.
Katie and JPJ are talking people, are you know, kind
of ragging on our our buddy Blake a little bit more.
(44:15):
All this stuff starts to get heated about midway throughout,
say an hour and a half into your reception, and
at that point I felt like there was no getting
it back. We actually Jessica and I left. Um I
bet we were literally on elevators, the two of you
and Jessica and I like side by side at the
same time, because it did feel like something was missing.
(44:36):
Was that I mean in the groom was gone, I
think for me and and if anybody's out there, they're like, Okay,
you give up some of the stuff with the TV wedding.
You understand that it sometimes you're gonna have a mic
issue and it's gonna have to pause and you're gonna
have to reset and do this, Like that's something you're
(44:56):
giving up to have a wedding in Mexico with your
family there so they can see all this go down
like that just happens, right, but there is And then
the reception, right, receptions are usually wild, their drama filled
most of the time in real life or on TV.
There's hook ups going on, there's crap tears like it's
that people are drinking, dancing, laughing, whatever. So I'm guess
(45:18):
I'm leaving your reception going. It just felt like a
little bit less than what I would experience in the
real world. Like it well, and I want to hear
if you agree, like you obviously left early, But it
did feel like all of a sudden you were gone.
We were gone, and I'm and we look back in
the room that everybody was like supposed to be in,
and it did it feel like everybody was in a
(45:39):
corner arguing, laughing, arguing or crying. Yeah, I will say
one thing that really stood out to me was that,
and then they didn't really show this too much, but
that they had invited multiple multiple um casts that were
not current cast or bridal party who were singles and
trying to get a chance to go down to Paradise. Yeah,
(46:02):
and so a lot of them came not for the
wedding per se, but to try to make a connection
to pursue someone to come back to Paradise. We're back
on to Paradise and Elise and Bibiana, I know we're there.
They had been kicked off Paradise. We're back at the
wedding looking to go back. Who were some of those
people that from past season that were down there kind
of looking to get onto Paradise. There was Um Brooks,
(46:25):
Jase McNary, Daniel Lombard, Uh, that girl Whitney Um, I
mean an Elie Um, Yeah, I mean there was there
was quite a bit. I'm trying to think of other ones,
but I mean those people were there too, and so
you had I mean, to be honest with you, it
kind of felt like a roast ceremony event. It seemed
(46:48):
like there was it seemed like there was panic. They
seemed like there was a lot of sadness. People were
scrambling because they thought that this was their chance to
go down to the island. Um. I remember people coming
up and asking like what should I do to try
to get on the show, And I'm thinking like, man,
this is my wedding, Like I can't be talking strategy
right now, this, this is not where my focus is.
That I felt deflated at that point. So it really did,
(47:09):
uh you know, in a weird way. It felt like
a roast ceremony. So people were actually asking you to
advice on how to get onto the show at your wedding. Yeah,
that's wild. Who I should who I should meet, who
I should hook up with? And I'm like, I don't.
I don't really know all the couples or the all
the all the situations that are going on right now,
and you know, it just it just for me. I
(47:30):
just I didn't anticipate that. I guess, m hmm. It
were you Okay, I mean, obviously the wedding was important
to you, like the ceremony, Were you willing to give
up the reception? But I mean, so here's here's where
this is coming from. I was in a car the
next morning heading to the airport with a bunch of
your family members and they were so thrilled with how
(47:52):
the whole thing went. So obviously the reception wasn't that
important to your family, like they really want to see
a beautiful wedding. So were you two going into it
willing to give up the reception kind of for the
sake of the show or was that something that you
really wanted. Honestly, we thought, I mean we spent I
mean a whole freaking playlist on Spotify of songs we
were going to play that not one was playing because
(48:15):
they couldn't play it because they were filming a show.
And so, I mean we thought it was gonna be
an actual party and it and it was in that
later half that was supposed to have been the DJ
and the floor dancing and you know, getting down, we
didn't have that element of it. So for me, I
think that's what we were most excited about. And we
were led to believe that that would be absolutely apart
(48:37):
of the ceremony or the reception, and it wasn't. But ultimately,
like we knew there was gonna be some kid, We
knew what there was gonna be some take And is
it worth the ceremony to not have the reception? Absolutely? Yeah.
The the ceremony was so beautiful, so gorgeous, everything we wanted.
And something you didn't see was the night before we
had our rehearsal dinner, which was just an incredible experience.
(48:58):
So ultimately our friends and failing us had a full
vacation that was I mean, it was awesome. It was
five star. So yeah, we didn't get that that second
half of the reception, and it was it was worth it.
I would say, I'm kind of thankful for the reception
because it allowed my friends and family, um to see
the element, uh that no one really sees, and that's
(49:21):
the show actually in full force taking place. And I
don't know if if Jessica can attest to this, but um,
it probably allows her to understand you more now when
you do talk about the show, and she can now
uh kind of be someone that you can confide in
when you do want to talk about the show because
she probably can be more understanding now, just as my
(49:42):
family and friends now, uh have allowed me to kind
of be more open about the show and have asked
me questions because now they understand and now they're not
judgmental or they're not confused, which has really kind of
helped my relationships with my boys as well, because they've
always tried but they couldn't really pinpoint or under stand,
and the same thing with my family. So in a
(50:02):
weird way, I am kind of thankful for for all
those things that took place at the reception because they
got to see it. Yeah, there's two things that Jessica
said to me after the wedding one, um, maybe three.
There's a lot of things. Actually, she said, uh, crystal beautiful,
what a great ceremony, those things, and then she was like,
I'm less intimidated. Was one thing. She said, Um, by
(50:22):
this world now, which is such a beautiful thing to hear.
She's like, for for so long, I've I've kind of
put the show up on a pedestal since I've met you,
and I've been intimidated by any person that's been on
the show. And I'm less intimidated now because I realized
everybody's like normal or just a little less than normal people. UM.
And then second is UM that she can relate with
(50:43):
me better, that she can understand more when I talk
about things. She knows me better because of that reception,
and because of the wildness that took place. UM, a
few less questions. I know we've got to get you
out of studio. UM, I really want to talk about
real quick, the Clay scenario with Angela. Angela was in
the wedding, she's a good friend of yours. At all,
did you feel bad about kind of setting I don't
(51:04):
I don't even say sitting clayics. I don't think you
set Clay up. You didn't even know he was really
gonna be there. Um, but what at all? Was there
a point in this that you felt bad for Clay
or was this kind of something that should just happen?
I mean, then we see Angela show up to the beach,
so obviously this was a scenario that was going to
happen somehow, some way. What were your thoughts, maybe he's
(51:24):
the best way to phrase this. On the Clay Angela
Nicole scenario during this time in Paradise. I mean, so
Clay is actually one of my really good friends. I'm
the one who got Clay and Angela together. Um, they're
both my good friends. And to believe it or not,
I was gonna have Clay view in my wedding and
that that kind of changed last minute because I didn't
(51:45):
want to have that situation and kind of you know,
take away from Crystal on her day. But the whole
dynamic is this is that you know the reason why
Clain Angela broke up is because Clay was in a
really tough spot, um with O t a s coming
up with the NFL and trying to get a tryout
and so what took places. They really had some deep
conversations and they were planning for the future. But Clay
(52:07):
takes care of his entire family, I mean down to
his grandma, down to his brother's financially and um, this
can be a burden on someone, especially when they have
the weight of all of that. And I think those
deep talks that they were having in the time that
they broke up, UM allowed him to open his eyes
and realize that right now, I need to figure out
myself first with what I can do moving forward from
(52:28):
my career in order to have these talks that I'm
having with Angela actually come to fruition. So in a way,
he didn't want to let Angela down, I think, and
and I understand from Angela's point of view two because
it is weird and it is shocking. However, though from that,
I would say that you know, Clay did the only
thing that he can do in that point in time,
and that was to let go, even though it hurts
(52:49):
both of them. And I think after a couple of
months went by, um, the whole career thing was now
taking a dramatic shift because I think at this point,
you know, the NFL has done for him, which is tough,
and I think for any man, especially who has put
so much work into to have that kind of slip
out of your hands, it's definitely definitely a shock and
it and it definitely affects who you are as a
(53:10):
man because then you have to figure out what's next.
And I think Bachelor Paradise was a way to get
away from this and and really be open to the
fact that knowing that he knows that it's over now,
maybe love can now be something that he can work
on and focus on because he can now kind of
um have it come back into his life. And and
(53:32):
what I think is the whole in the cold situation
is they get along great. I actually love them. I
think they were I think they were beautiful. And I
think that everything that we saw with Clan Angela is
exactly what we would have expected, um from the reception
or from the ceremony to the reception. And to be
honest with you, uh, I don't have any ill will
towards anything that took place with them, because I think
(53:53):
that this was important for them to have that talk.
I think that this was important for them to see
each other face to face because at the end of
the day, we're really going to now and see the
true answer if this is a couple that um is
someone that should be together, or if they should be
a part. Yeah, it's going to be a storyline we
want to follow in Paradise for sure. Yeah. Absolutely. And
I know I definitely was nervous and I spoke with
Angela prior to the wedding and I was like, I
(54:15):
know Clay's going to be there. We hear he's dating someone.
I really don't want this drama to take away from
the wedding. And she had really reassured me that she
was in a good place and you know, it would
it would be good. So we were so we knew
that we knew that going in, and we knew that
there was going to be an opportunity for them to
actually come together and talk since they had broken up,
(54:36):
and I think that that Angela was really needing some
closure on this relationship, so we wanted them to sit
down and have a conversation. So we were really supportive
of it. And we love Angela very deeply and we
love Clay and we both want them both to be
happy and to take the opportunity for them to explore
what they want. And I think that for Clay, what
(54:56):
is going to be really interesting that we're going to
see play out this season is I mean, he broke
up with Angela because he needs time to find out
who he is. What's his identity post football, which consumed
who he was and now he no longer has that,
So who is he now? And he needs to take
that time to to find himself and to create this
new life. And is he ready for a relationship or
(55:20):
does he still need to take take some time. That's
a good theme for the rest of Paradise. Is Clay
ready for relationship or does he need takes some time? Uh?
Chris and Crystal, thank you for sharing about your wedding
on this podcast. UM. What a wild season of Bachelor
in Paradise. We hope we can celebrate couples from this
(55:40):
season like we're able to celebrate YouTube you are, You're.
The words of wisdom that both of you shared are
things that UM, I'll take with me, UM that I'll
point other people too. I bet on this podcast for
years to come. When they are villains and they feel
like they've gotten a bad edit or whatever, I'll just say,
you need to talk to Chris and Crystal because, UM,
(56:01):
redemption does exist, but it has to exist within yourself first.
And I think those are words that I'm going to
take from listening to both of you. I'm so pumped
that I got to celebrate. Thank you for inviting Jessica
and I to the wedding. Thank you for allowing us
to be down there and on the prom Thank you,
um being at the Vedanta. Is there anything in your
lives right now that you'd like to share with our
listeners before we go? Yeah, I want to say the
work that Chris and I did have been doing on
(56:24):
ourselves has really evolved so much are who we are
as people as well as our relationship and then just
elevated us into such as beautiful transformation. And so I've
decided to now incorporate life coaching into my fitness coaching
to be working with women on empowering their mind, honoring
their bodies, and transforming their lives. So that's going to
(56:46):
be coming up really uh soon, and I cannot wait
to start just being um just speaking to women in
their heart because I think a lot of us just
feel unworthy and unhappy and we're really desperately seeking happiness.
But ultimately it's within ourselves and we all have the tools.
Sometimes we just need a coach to point us in
the right direction to bring that out within ourselves. So
(57:09):
coach Crystal dot com coming soon. Good for you guys. Hey, Uh,
thank you for sharing your wedding with us on TV.
Fans and listeners of this podcast have already started to
write in and just say how awesome it is to
see weddings on this show and celebrate the two of you. Uh, Chris,
you are the best doggie daddy I know. In Crystal
(57:32):
Um is that what you called him a doggy daddy
dog daddy, boys, I call him daddy. So yeah, we've
talked about that in this podcast. That's all heir about it.
Hey follow my league guys, thanks again for co hosting
with me today. Uh, actually we'll be back soon. Listeners
out there, the Almost Famous podcast is moving and grooving.
(57:54):
Make sure you tune in next week to another breakdown
of Bachelor in Paradise. With that I've Been Been and
I've than Crystal and I Been Christ followed the Bennon
Ashley I Almost Famous Podcast on iHeart Radio or subscribe
wherever you listen to podcasts
Hosts And Creators
Ben Higgins
Ashley Iaconetti
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