February 13, 2025 • 56 mins
The final couple in our “Love Stories” series has been married 10 years, but for part of that, one of them was riding around with divorce papers in the car!
It’s Jennie Garth and Dave Abrams’ turn to answer Amy & T.J.’s “Love Stories” list of questions. Their answers were poignant, touching, hilarious, and proof that lasting love and lasting relationships can overcome just about anything!
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:02):
Hey, there are folks in this episode nine to two
to one. Oh No. Our Glove series internues with the
love stories of two folks now who have been in
a relationship a marriage for ten years. But get this,
one of those years he rode around with their divorce
papers in the back of his truck. Yes, welcome to
(00:24):
this special cuffings. He's an edition of ABN TJ.
Speaker 2 (00:28):
Robs.
Speaker 1 (00:28):
This has been a blast. This was our final couple. Boy,
they went out with a bang. Didn't I love these two?
Speaker 3 (00:34):
And certainly did.
Speaker 4 (00:35):
Jenny Garth and her husband Dave Abrams. They have a
nine year age difference. Jenny is nine years older than Dave. Yes,
she already had three kids from a previous marriage coming
into this relationship. And one of my favorite moments is
when we asked about whether or not these two had
chemistry when they first met. Because this was a double
(00:57):
blind date. They were set up to meet one another,
and the moment Jenny says she saw Dave, she said,
oh hell no, oh hell no.
Speaker 1 (01:04):
You know, we we get into this in the interview
we do with her, but we have spent some time
with her over the past year, and we've heard this
story from her in person. Now you'll hear how she
answers the question he and what do you say? She said, oh,
hell no, Well, she was just like it.
Speaker 3 (01:18):
Was a hard note for her when she saw him.
Speaker 1 (01:20):
But then we've talked to her in person and asked
her about it. She said what she saw, she was like.
Speaker 4 (01:25):
Like, she right, But she goes on to describe him
as tall, dark and handsome with a pea coat, who
looked like an actor, and she was just like.
Speaker 1 (01:32):
Ugh, yeah, but for a lot of people that would
sound awesome. He sounds great. He's a good looking, tall,
god great guy. But for her, in that world, she
was immediately turned off by someone who looked like he
was in that world.
Speaker 4 (01:45):
Yes, because she, of course has spent most of her
at least at that point, most of her life in
front of the camera in Hollywood.
Speaker 3 (01:52):
Man, I grew up watching her.
Speaker 4 (01:53):
I'm the same age as her, so I grew up
with her watching her do nine O two and Ozero.
But yeah, she was just wanting out of that whole scene,
and he looked as though he was a part of it,
even though he isn't.
Speaker 2 (02:05):
He isn't.
Speaker 1 (02:06):
But these two they were the last now in our
series and they were. I said this to you during
the interview. I leaned over and I said, these are adults,
like they are grown folks who've been through a lot.
They've been through previous relationships and marriages, they broke up
for a little while, you got step kids involved. There's
so much going on. But they also show us that, yes,
(02:27):
despite all of that, there's still something to them that
is evident in the conversation we're having. It's not just
a matter we're still together or we've been together two years. No,
you can see them while they sit next to each
other and how they talk to each other, that there
is something still special going on with these two. I
love it.
Speaker 4 (02:40):
It is inspirational to know that you can get that
low and be that bad off where you actually have
divorce papers and you are not talking, you are not
seeing each other for over a year, and here they are,
six years after that tumultuous year. They can sit there
and be in love and so comfortable with one another,
(03:01):
and the trust that they've built up from going through
that trunk is evident and speaks to the strength of
their relationship today. So, without further ado, please take a
listen to our conversation with Jenny Garth and Dave Abrams.
Jenny and Dave are with us now. Thank you all
for agreeing to do this, and thank you for being
with us today.
Speaker 5 (03:22):
Absolutely, you're welcome. We love seeing you too.
Speaker 3 (03:26):
I we love seeing you.
Speaker 4 (03:27):
It's been so much fun to see couples sitting next
to each other, interacting with each other while answering the questions.
It's a very different experience than just interviewing someone one
on one. So this, we promise this will be fun.
Speaker 3 (03:39):
All right, we'll start off.
Speaker 4 (03:40):
With each of you give me three words to describe
the state of your relationship right now.
Speaker 3 (03:48):
Who wants to go first?
Speaker 6 (03:51):
Okay, the first three words that pop in my head,
I would say stability. That just popped in my head.
I don't know if this is a negative word, but
content is like that was another one. No, but it
just I'm I'm I've been like mulling over like how
(04:11):
I'm very content and and it's like it's it's a
weird feeling, because when are you you know, some something's happening,
But no, no, no, I'm feeling like trying to understand, trying to
understand the words I'm not.
Speaker 5 (04:28):
I've only gotten.
Speaker 6 (04:30):
A content, stability, and I would say, uh, support is
another one. Oh well you yeah, I went first, So
I think support is right now. I feel like with
her supporting me and me supporting her with all the
(04:51):
you know stuff she has going and yeah, and it
is the same with me as well. Her support for
me is yeah, full on and that's been That was
one of the big things early in our relationship was
sometimes I felt like I wasn't supported.
Speaker 1 (05:06):
So okay, that's just question one.
Speaker 2 (05:11):
We just don't question one. Guys.
Speaker 1 (05:13):
All right, Jenny, where are your three words support?
Speaker 7 (05:17):
Support, I wou'd say humorous, we laugh a lot, and reliable.
Speaker 5 (05:28):
We are we are we always do what we say
we're going to do. We're always where we say we're
going to be, and that gives both of us, I think,
such a sense of stability and that reassurance.
Speaker 6 (05:40):
There's next places we are actually ever at any good point, so.
Speaker 5 (05:47):
We don't we don't stray far from our so forth.
Speaker 1 (05:48):
Yeah, gotchaka, next question here and we this is going
to be fun because we have heard part of the
story about how you all met. But the question that
we've asked all the couples is was there immediate chemistry
when you first.
Speaker 5 (06:02):
Met you want me to go first?
Speaker 3 (06:04):
No, it was a blind date, right, it was.
Speaker 5 (06:09):
A blind double date. And I think I told you
guys this once on some other podcasts we do. But
we we talked about the fact that I walked into
the setup location, the restaurant, the bar, and I walked
in and I immediately saw a tall, handsome, like actor
looking guy with scrubble pea coat, so pretentious, and I
(06:32):
was like, oh, I thought, no, no, so yeah, that
was my first I disagree.
Speaker 6 (06:41):
I think that it was.
Speaker 5 (06:42):
There was a disagree with my reaction.
Speaker 6 (06:44):
No chemistry, The question was chemistry. I feel like there
was chemistry. We were just kind of like waiting for it.
Because after we left that date with the two people
that we were on the date with, we went and
had a drink by ourselves, and that's when, Yeah, we
had a lot of chemistry. We didn't stop seeing each other,
(07:06):
like and then we got married.
Speaker 3 (07:10):
So there, who said I love you first?
Speaker 6 (07:14):
Probably me?
Speaker 5 (07:15):
I was thinking, it's probably me. Wow, is it bad
that we don't remember?
Speaker 1 (07:21):
No this, We've talked all these couples. This is the
first time there wasn't an immediate Ah, it's usually is
the guy.
Speaker 3 (07:28):
It was usually the guy.
Speaker 2 (07:30):
But yeah, okay, but you all can't remember who it was.
Speaker 6 (07:34):
No, I remember so much vividly. I don't. I feel
like it was me, but you feel like it was you.
Speaker 5 (07:41):
I don't. I don't know. I think I blocked that
on my memory.
Speaker 1 (07:46):
How about I put it this way, you all knowing
what you know of each other and your relationship. Now,
who is it more likely? You think probably said it first.
Speaker 5 (07:56):
I feel like it's more likely me because I'm a
little bit more of a communicator, like a clear shooter,
you know. I'm like, look, I love you, let's not
waste any more time.
Speaker 6 (08:08):
Yeah, that's true, That could be true. Yeah, I agree
with that, all right. She's very yeah, very direct.
Speaker 4 (08:16):
That is a good thing in a relationship. How long
did you all date before you got engaged? How long
were you engaged before you got married.
Speaker 5 (08:25):
We were engaged.
Speaker 6 (08:27):
We got months after we met December, January, February. We
were engaged in March. We got married in July.
Speaker 5 (08:37):
Wow, six months and got married at six months six months?
Speaker 4 (08:42):
Did you have any reservations at that, like, for having
such an accelerated timeline.
Speaker 6 (08:48):
Uh? Yeah, yeah, yeah, I mean, because I mean it
bit us in the butt like three years down the
road because we didn't I mean, we broke up for
like eight.
Speaker 5 (08:57):
Months a year. It was twelve months, actually.
Speaker 6 (08:59):
It was it was like eight months, just twelve.
Speaker 3 (09:02):
You broke up. You were already married though, so you
were you were separated, separated.
Speaker 5 (09:06):
Yeah, but I think that's because we did jump into
it full and fast like that, and I think we
could have used a little more time to understand get
to know each other and our problem solving where we
each were individually, like in our growth and my healing,
and you know, we just could have used some more time. Probably.
Speaker 6 (09:25):
I had a lot of stuff that, you know, that
I had to kind of deal with that I didn't
deal with in my single days and other relationships that
you know, the same patterns were happening. I had to
look at myself and also she had to look at herself.
And then it's been great ever since. So it was
(09:47):
I mean, it's crazy, but it was such a Our
journey has been such a blessing. I mean, I know
it sounds cheesy to say that, but it's it's true.
I wouldn't have changed that.
Speaker 4 (09:56):
That totally makes sense. What happened in those eight or
ten months. It was the difference that made the difference
that now look at you, how many years later, still together,
still happy.
Speaker 3 (10:07):
What happened during that period of time when you separated.
Speaker 6 (10:09):
Been back together for like six years during the break
when we were broken up.
Speaker 5 (10:16):
I think we just both, like we said, did a
lot of personal growth. I think that prior to the breakup,
to the separation, i'll call it, we had been going
to couple therapy and that wasn't working for us like that.
He did not like that and so and it didn't
it didn't help us. So we thought he didn't want
to do it anymore. And I thought, well, why don't
(10:37):
I just work on myself and you work on yourself,
and they'll see what happens and see if that if
we uncover some things, some truths about ourselves that we
need to look at and you know, grow through. And
I think that that's one of the big things that
happened while we were separated. He had his divorce papers
in a Manila envelope in the back you know how
(10:58):
you're he has a truck and then in the back
of the truck seat there's a pocket like in the seat. Yeah,
the Manila envelope with our divorce papers completely ready to
sign here, drove them around for months and months and
months in this car. Yeah.
Speaker 6 (11:12):
So I filed in like April. There was like you know,
the first four months where it's anger and just I
don't want to talk to you. I'm done, I'm blah blah.
So I got papers drawn up in like April. I
didn't know what I was doing. The guy was like, well,
you have community properties, Like I don't care, just do
whatever is the easiest fast trap.
Speaker 5 (11:32):
Oh my god.
Speaker 6 (11:33):
And then in December January we started kind of dating
again and becoming like trying to do like we made
it a point to be like a normal couple. I
had a little apartment, I had gotten a dog, like
I was going through something, and so she you guys.
Speaker 5 (11:53):
He got a dog. While wait, it's a dog. Yeah,
oh wait, know you got a new truck, a giant
truck that doesn't even fit on the streets of Los Angeles.
Speaker 2 (12:04):
I mean, okay, he was going through something.
Speaker 3 (12:05):
Yeah, okay, you is the dog still with you?
Speaker 4 (12:08):
All?
Speaker 5 (12:09):
Yeah?
Speaker 6 (12:09):
Yeah, he's our son now. Yeah, he's like he's in
love more. He's in love with Jenny. Like that's his person.
Speaker 1 (12:18):
We're more concerned that you're in love with her and
she's still your person. Yeah, mister Manila envelope.
Speaker 5 (12:25):
Jesus seriously, guys, the Manila envelope was still in there
like a year I think after.
Speaker 6 (12:31):
Yeah, we got back. I just sat there. I don't
throw away a lot of stuff.
Speaker 3 (12:37):
That might be one thing you should throw away though.
Speaker 6 (12:40):
Yeah, it's gone. The truck's gone.
Speaker 1 (12:45):
Wow, guys, I think we could rap now because you
all just answered questions eight through forty.
Speaker 2 (13:00):
Next question here is there? I'm not sure.
Speaker 1 (13:03):
Is there an age difference and has it played any
role in your relationship?
Speaker 6 (13:09):
Yes, I'm nine.
Speaker 5 (13:11):
Years older than Dave.
Speaker 6 (13:13):
So when we met, I was thirty four, she was
forty three, and then we got married. I was thirty
five four five he got married. Oh my god, I can't.
Speaker 5 (13:23):
When we go back in time and I realized how
young you were, it freaks me out a little bit.
Speaker 6 (13:29):
I was a young thirty five.
Speaker 1 (13:32):
Yeah, you know what, that made complete sense to me.
I didn't get close to the beginning to get my
ish together in life until I was probably thirty eight
or thirty nine. I was a mess, so that it
makes perfect sense.
Speaker 6 (13:48):
Yeah, I mean, yeah, that was that was totally true
with me, and then jumping into the situation where I
had three step children the ages of like sixteen eleven
or or Lola was just twelve, and then Fiona was
a seven eight, and then taking all that on and
the dogs and then this celebrity and this celebrity that
(14:10):
I had just come into her life, and then like
paparazzi and like stuff like that, and then.
Speaker 5 (14:17):
It was a lot.
Speaker 6 (14:18):
It was a lot.
Speaker 3 (14:19):
Yeah, that makes a lot of sense.
Speaker 4 (14:21):
So I mean, that's that's admirable that you all took
a beat and it was probably scary as hell and
awful for that period of time.
Speaker 3 (14:28):
But look at you now.
Speaker 4 (14:29):
That's that's really impressive and it's inspirational for folks who
are going through tough times.
Speaker 3 (14:33):
But you can, you know, you can figure it out.
Speaker 5 (14:36):
Yeah you want to.
Speaker 3 (14:37):
That's really cool.
Speaker 5 (14:38):
I didn't get through it. But back to your point
about the age thing, So they're having that gap in
age there there have been times when it comes up.
I think not as much anymore because, like we said,
he has done some growing up. I've stopped growing up
and you keep growing up, which is great. So now
we're kind of like in the middle.
Speaker 6 (14:58):
Yeah, I agree, the age difference. I never really felt
I never really that wasn't that wasn't really a big
issue to me. It was a bigger issue for everybody
else because they would, you know, they would talk about
it more in the news or whatever. When we were
first together, it was a thing.
Speaker 4 (15:17):
But funny enough, if a man was nine years older
than the woman, no one would say, oh, that's just
when It's like.
Speaker 6 (15:23):
No one would that and I no one would care,
and no it ever gets talked about. But I mean,
I think there was a couple other celebrities that Kristin
Cavaleria was dating like a twenty five year old and
that was all over the news.
Speaker 3 (15:35):
Yeah, no, I hear you.
Speaker 4 (15:37):
Why did you two and you made the decision very quickly,
as you just told us, Why did you two want
to be married? And where do you think the two
of you would be if you had just chosen to
stay as a couple and never actually officially legally get married.
Speaker 5 (15:55):
I think for me, having three you know, grows who
were young young tweens and teenagers, it was weird for
me to just, based on my morals and my upbringings
to have a man in the house that I wasn't
fully committed to or he wasn't fully committed to me,
because I didn't want to give them the messaging. That's
(16:16):
what was one of the things that was important for me,
And maybe that was one of the things that you know,
caused us to rush into it because marriage was more
important to me. I'm just I'm a Midwestern I like
to be married. I like to have full on commitment,
and I like to know I'm not wasting my time
with somebody, you know what I mean.
Speaker 6 (16:36):
So for me that yeah, yeah, I mean I think
for me, I didn't. I didn't think about marriage. I
didn't really think about kids. I didn't. I just was
kind of, you know, plugging away and this kind of
just like happened, and I just kind of went with it.
(16:57):
I got into it.
Speaker 1 (16:58):
No appreciate the honesty of that answer, really there, Jenny,
to be able to talk about it in such a way.
Speaker 2 (17:04):
Yet, you know what, we probably.
Speaker 1 (17:05):
Because of you wanted marriage and because of the way
you came up, you probably rushed into the marriage.
Speaker 2 (17:11):
That was a very honest answer.
Speaker 6 (17:12):
I appreciate that one hundred percent. I mean I was
so in love and so like committed. At that time,
I was like, let's let me do everything I can
to show this woman that I am this person and
I am committed. And then you know, obviously after the
(17:36):
purple roses whatever the saying is, and you've hit reality
and then you're yeah, it's a lot. But I think
looking back, I wouldn't have changed anything. But I love
what we did.
Speaker 3 (17:50):
That's very cool.
Speaker 4 (17:52):
So we I always preface this next question with we
ask everyone this question, answer it however you'd like. But
how would you describe your sex life and how has
it changed over the years.
Speaker 5 (18:04):
Well, when we got together. When we first got together,
I was in my forties, and you know what they
say about ladies in their forties, late forties, Like I
was ready all the time, right, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 4 (18:15):
Yes, yeah, women come into their sexual powers in their
thirties and forties. Yeah.
Speaker 5 (18:22):
And I think that you had I don't know.
Speaker 6 (18:25):
Where you were this like in the beginning. Yeah, yeah,
I mean it's always good at the beginning, and then.
Speaker 3 (18:31):
You know, and then you know, yeah, I mean, you know.
Speaker 6 (18:38):
We don't really were We don't really talk a lot
about sex and stuff like that. I'm pretty modest, I
don't I've never you know, been very wealth Yeah, totally,
but I would say that it's definitely gotten better. There's
definitely been challenges with menopause and certain things and.
Speaker 5 (18:56):
Teenage kids in the house all the time.
Speaker 6 (18:59):
We have never we never have an empty house. So
it's like, I mean even the twenty two year old
those with us, which I love that she's here. Her
boyfriend's also here like a lot, which I love him too,
but it's a full house.
Speaker 5 (19:15):
Does that have effect? Yeah, we go on weekend ways.
Speaker 6 (19:19):
We just did, like just like we just went to
Palm Springs for like a night just to get out,
just to be like, we throw the phone away, we
just need to get away. And that was great. But
that we have.
Speaker 5 (19:31):
To get speak quiet all the time. That I hope
my kids aren't listening to this. You don't need to
be quiet. All our balls are shared by two teenage girls.
Like it's a thing.
Speaker 3 (19:42):
Yeah, that's tough.
Speaker 6 (19:43):
And we know this because they've said, well, why were
you guys arguing this? I was like, it wasn't what
are you talking about?
Speaker 5 (19:50):
That was Now when we have sex, we argue just
to fool them.
Speaker 6 (19:54):
Oh my god, we turn on the TV. We've last
the TV.
Speaker 2 (20:01):
This is a real relationship here.
Speaker 1 (20:03):
This is great, all right, next question here, aside from
sex though physical touch, how important is physical touch? For example,
walking down the street, do you find yourself you're always
holding hands. If you're in the room, do you find
yourselves rubbing up against each other? How important is that
to you?
Speaker 5 (20:19):
Well, I know you two are touchers. You like physical connection.
I love that about your couple. But we always hold hands.
I think when we met, I was like, here's a
couple things that are really important to me. I like
to have my handheld, and I like someone to open
the door for me, like all the time. Never I
(20:40):
never touch a doorknob, Like that's kind of like my dream.
And he was all for that. We hold hands constantly,
and I'm a lot more touchy, I think than he is.
But also we're very independent, so there's times when I
don't need it, he doesn't need it, but I should
need that hug at the end of the day or
before big thing I need.
Speaker 6 (21:01):
Yeah, I've kind of been, i mean, growing into being
more affectionate, especially with the girls. Like you know, I'm
not I'm not very affectionate. I mean I show my
love and how I do like I show up for people,
I'm there. That's kind of like my showing like affection.
I know she always needs like a hug, so it's
(21:23):
like tuning that in just to go hug her out
of the blue, or like give one of the girls
a hug, Like that's a big thing for me, just
to even hug.
Speaker 5 (21:31):
Like it's kind of like the way you grew up.
Probably physical, No, we snuggle my my kids and I
snuggle constantly, so that physical touch is really important.
Speaker 3 (21:43):
That's cute. I love that.
Speaker 4 (21:45):
So we know that you pretend to fight when you're
having sex, but how often do.
Speaker 3 (21:49):
You actually fight?
Speaker 4 (21:54):
So? Yeah, how often do you actually fight? And is
there something you fight about?
Speaker 3 (21:58):
Most?
Speaker 5 (22:00):
I think we argue about the girls, one the youngest,
probably in particular, just because of maybe not understanding I
understand her in a different way than he might be
able to. What else is there we do? We argue
about money? No, because we're kind of his her and hours.
Speaker 6 (22:22):
So yeah, I mean, what do we are alowed to argue?
Speaker 2 (22:28):
Golf?
Speaker 5 (22:28):
Golf?
Speaker 6 (22:29):
That's what he was going to say, golf.
Speaker 5 (22:31):
I'm a golf widow.
Speaker 4 (22:33):
Oh, I was trying to figure out he golfs too much?
Speaker 3 (22:36):
And it takes it takes what six hours, seven hours?
Speaker 6 (22:39):
I mean, I'm I'm on a golf team and then
we're in season right now, and then you have to
have a dinner after you play on Thursday, and it's
a bunch of other clubs golf.
Speaker 3 (22:51):
Then there's the nineteenth hole.
Speaker 2 (22:53):
I know, one night a week.
Speaker 6 (22:57):
Well, in this it's not.
Speaker 5 (22:58):
A nice t J. It's damn day.
Speaker 2 (23:01):
Okay, so one day a week.
Speaker 6 (23:03):
Yeah, but yeah, and then tournaments and stuff like that.
It can be like a weekend. But but that's it.
Like I only go to golf work, okay, don't.
Speaker 5 (23:12):
I used to care about it a lot more. Now
I'm so busy. I'm like, go do your thing. I'll
see you later. What bring me dinner? I don't know
what's happening.
Speaker 6 (23:20):
And it's interesting. I've been I've been sober for like
two and a half almost three years, so like being
around this environment where guys are just getting trash, I
just haven't. I just sit there like it was.
Speaker 5 (23:34):
He doesn't really, Yeah, I don't care get involved with
that part anymore, which is such. I mean, like I
didn't never know jumping onto that topic, like I didn't
never know how insecure. That environment made me not insecure,
but just unstable, like destabilized. When like my husband would
go and you know, drink with the guys at the club,
(23:57):
I worry, like I worry about I'm driving, and I
just I don't know, I think that since he stopped
drinking by his choice, it was, it's been such a
secure feeling for me. I love it. I stopped drinking too,
So we're in it together.
Speaker 3 (24:12):
Oh, very cool.
Speaker 1 (24:13):
All right, Well, next question here, When was the last time,
I don't know how, Maybe this was this morning, or
maybe it was weeks ago, the last time you remember
having to say I'm sorry to the other And what
was it for?
Speaker 6 (24:26):
Oh, that's a good question. I feel like I just
said I'm sorry for something.
Speaker 1 (24:32):
Probably it was probably on golf day.
Speaker 5 (24:37):
He doesn't apologize for that.
Speaker 6 (24:41):
What was it recently? It was like it was recently?
It was like this past weekend.
Speaker 5 (24:46):
I don't know.
Speaker 6 (24:46):
Oh was it Sunday morning? And I was so frustrated
because it was the game. I went into work and
then I came back and then they were reupholsteraing shared
so everything.
Speaker 5 (25:01):
Sunday you're not supposed to do any household.
Speaker 6 (25:04):
Chores my daughter Lola and her are constantly they work
on the brand together, but they're constantly doing like projects,
like they don't stop. Like they took apart this these
two seats that were pink and re upholstered them. When
I got my upholster guy, he was like, we could
I could do it for nine hundred bucks, but.
Speaker 5 (25:25):
We wanted to do it ourselves.
Speaker 6 (25:26):
So they couldn't do it themselves. So they needed a
little bit of help. But Sunday morning, the.
Speaker 5 (25:31):
Staple or gun, those are really hard to use, you
guys on my hand is not that strong anymore.
Speaker 6 (25:36):
And then now they want to cut the barstools three
inches off the metal, which they need a welder to
do that.
Speaker 5 (25:43):
So they asked what time when you were? Sorry lost?
Speaker 6 (25:48):
I think it was Sunday.
Speaker 5 (25:49):
I was.
Speaker 6 (25:50):
I had a little bit of a temper tandrent because
then the internet. Then they had the Internet guy coming
over on Sunday on a Sunday.
Speaker 1 (26:00):
The Internet guy on a Sunday Jednie.
Speaker 5 (26:03):
Appointment up and then he got mad at oh happening?
Speaker 6 (26:06):
Well they were well, they were late, and then this
guy's like, well we got to run these wires. It's noon.
I gotta be so. Yeah, I did say I was
sorry because you were being a little bio because I
was being a bitch a little bit. But I had
a lot of anxiety about the Eagles and then you know,
(26:28):
facilitating people at work, and so yeah, you know.
Speaker 4 (26:31):
I think it takes a lot, though, to admit that
you know, and to say you're sorry.
Speaker 3 (26:36):
I think that's cool and that's what it's all about.
Speaker 6 (26:38):
Right.
Speaker 1 (26:38):
Oh man, I'm if I had to be asked this question.
I didn't think about until now. The last time I
had to say I'm sorry was for something similar. I apologize.
We get up two three in the morning sometimes don't
get a lot of sleep, and I was just frantic
and I was not in a good way. I'm slamming
stuff in a hurry. And I later just said, you
know what, I'm sorry for how I was. I was
(26:59):
not in a good way.
Speaker 3 (27:00):
It's amazing to hear it. I wasn't even upset about it.
Speaker 4 (27:03):
I knew that you hadn't slept that much, and it
was cool to have you even say that when I
wasn't even I didn't even say anything, But it makes
it makes a big difference.
Speaker 5 (27:10):
Yeah, I think saying sorry is so underrated because it
really makes the other person feel seen and respected. I
think when there's a conflict, to work it out on
your own and come back to the person and have
that clear conversation with like, I'm not going to point
the finger at you in this situation. I'm going to
point the thumb and look at how I what my
(27:32):
bark wasn't And it just feels really reassuring to have that.
I think I apologize to him this morning because he
walked into the bedroom with this giant cup of coffee
from Starbucks and he was just sitting there holding it
and drinking it. And I just stared at her and
I was like, where's Mike. You didn't get me any
You didn't get me a tea? And he said no,
(27:52):
I didn't. He's like, oh you didn't. You didn't you
went to Starbus, you didn't get meyone? He said, no,
I didn't think of you. And then so I go, oh, mad, yeah,
not terribly. Well.
Speaker 6 (28:05):
I was joking with her.
Speaker 5 (28:07):
He was joking, I'm sorry that I believed you.
Speaker 3 (28:12):
Basically that's hilarious. I said, but that's cute. You still
have a little humor.
Speaker 4 (28:19):
You knew she might get mad, but it would be
a funny moment when she realized.
Speaker 2 (28:23):
I get it right. You said, I'm sorry that I
thought you were in Is that right?
Speaker 6 (28:28):
Yeah?
Speaker 5 (28:29):
Okay, got it like that, apology.
Speaker 2 (28:33):
Sorry about that day? All right?
Speaker 1 (28:34):
Next up here speak Well, we'll stick with the mad
and the fight theme for a second. This will be
the last one in that regard. Do you make a
point of not going to bed angry or do sometimes
you do.
Speaker 5 (28:44):
It sometimes to be angry.
Speaker 6 (28:48):
Yes, I mean I would like to make it a
point not to go to bed angry, but sometimes we
do go to bed angry.
Speaker 5 (28:53):
You just gotta call it. Sometimes.
Speaker 6 (28:56):
You ever have the you know, where it's it's getting
late and you know you're sitting on the side of
the bed and you're like, well, I'm going to go
in there, but I'm not. I'm just going to stay
in this, And then you're just like, well, we're exhausted.
What's good?
Speaker 5 (29:12):
So? Or did you know those times when when like
my world would be so going so fast that it's
not until I lay my head on the pillow that
I kind of assess things with regard to like what
we're going through and what we're talking about, where we are,
and that's when I'm like, so should we talk about
the thing?
Speaker 6 (29:31):
And maybe at that point where I'm like, no, I
had all the like, honey, honey talk, yeah, that's the thing,
Like I should be better at that, But that is
that is where I've kind of had more time because
she is so busy and when I'm done, I'm done,
and she's yeah she wants to talk at that point
(29:52):
where it's like midnight and I'm like, no, I'm out.
Speaker 3 (30:04):
What do you each love the most about the other?
Speaker 5 (30:09):
I love that Dave is fun. He's fun. He makes
me laugh in every situation. He's like he's like a
walking Saturday Night Live show all the time. He's always
doing like voices and mimic. You know, He's just fun
to hang out with. He's brought such a levity into
(30:30):
our home. And you know, because the kids and I
went through a really hard time with the divorce and
the family's breaking up and everything, and when he came in,
that's what we all noticed that we all just felt
happier when he was around. So that's one of the things.
Speaker 6 (30:44):
I love about Well, Honey, I'm gonna cry at nine
o'clock in the morning.
Speaker 5 (30:50):
I also love that he's tall because I am short
and I can't reach a lot of things, so that's
really helpful.
Speaker 6 (31:00):
I love most about Jenny is she's fierce. I don't know,
like she's she just when she says she's going to
do something, she does it. Her loyalty is unmatched, and
I've learned a lot about that. It's almost loyal to
a fault, but I'd rather do that than the opposite.
(31:23):
And she's had the same people around her for thirty
something years and that says a lot about who she
is and her character, and I've learned a lot. Yeah,
I mean, I love I just you know, when you
she's just my human And so even though I tried
(31:45):
to get away, just that's just the way it is.
Speaker 4 (31:50):
You know.
Speaker 1 (31:50):
It wasn't lost on us either, Jenny. Since we've been
asking questions, there were some you deferred and you pause
and you say, hey, you go first, but we when
she asked what do you love most about the other?
You jumped in immediately and had something you knew and
you wanted to speak first on that. So that wasn't law.
That was a very cute moment to see. We got
to turn to some practical stuff. Now the household. You kind
(32:12):
of alluded to it, but this happens in every relationship.
How do you handle household finances together separate?
Speaker 2 (32:20):
How does it work?
Speaker 6 (32:22):
Well, it's a little different. I mean it's different.
Speaker 5 (32:26):
Situation is different. Pres is not traditional.
Speaker 6 (32:30):
I would say, no, I contribute to household around our house.
But if I wasn't married to my wife, I would
not be living in this house. Let's just say so.
Speaker 5 (32:45):
Probably stepped into a lifestyle that he did not see coming,
and I would never ever expect him to being that.
I I've always been independent financially since I started making money.
I always will take care myself and my kids. So
I never would expect him to come in and take
care of me, or take care of the girls, or
(33:07):
pay fifty percent of what or what take over the
payments for this lifestyle that I've created for myself and
the girls.
Speaker 6 (33:14):
So we did. Yeah, we did have some resentment. She
had some resentment towards me a couple of years ago,
just because it was like after COVID, I'm in the
restaurant business. I lost one, I sold another one, and
then I was starting a new one. So we had
we had to go through a lot of like growing
(33:36):
pains to where we got now to where it on
that front, we're very secure in what our contributions are
to this family and that probably for the first time
in our marriage we've both felt that way. And yeah,
so I think that that was a very that was
(33:58):
a big point of contention our relationship that we just
kind of swept under the rug a little bit, but
it did when we had to confront it, I go, Okay,
I didn't know you were feeling that well way, so
let's do this to alleviate that, and me working and
busting to help her in that way, it was a
(34:21):
it makes me feel good, as you know, as a
partner that it's not all on.
Speaker 5 (34:26):
Her right, but it's always We've always been very clear
that this is the world that I created and I
live in, and I don't expect you to jump into
this financially because that's not you know, I wouldn't ask
anybody to jump into a situation that they are not
familiar with. So I think that we've navigated it pretty well.
(34:46):
And I will say too, like you know, I used to.
I've said before in certain relationships, like when the woman
is the you know, breadwinner or makes more money than
the man that I heard Sally Field say this once.
It's like a cancer eats away the relationship, which is
a pretty dramatic visual, but it's honestly like there's a
(35:08):
seed planted, and if that seed of resentment or contempt
or any bitterness about that, if that seed is watered,
it really can grow and just some a big fat
weed in your relationship. So I think that really being
honest and upfront about each of our independent finances and
(35:31):
how we see ourselves and then how we see us
as a couple has really benefited us.
Speaker 6 (35:36):
Yeah. I mean when we first met, she didn't know.
When I first moved in with her at the other house,
I was like, well, so what's your what's the electrical bill?
Let me see what that looks like. She didn't know,
So that's where we started. So I had to like
delve in, do you know that this is much money?
(35:59):
We shouldn't keep that full heater on because that's a
lot of money.
Speaker 5 (36:04):
Like the water warm, what's.
Speaker 6 (36:06):
The So things like that. That's gotten a lot better
where she over our tenure relationship, has learned so much
more about finances and has gotten her own finances under control.
And and and it's so wonderful to see her bloom
in that regard and for me just to say, well,
(36:28):
I you know, I helped her with that as well
as she supported me with other things, you know, I
mean COVID was tough. I mean I opened a new
spot and I was working five nights a week just
going in there, and you know, she supported me through that,
and then now we're at this point. It's great.
Speaker 3 (36:48):
Yeah, that's so cool.
Speaker 4 (36:49):
I mean because finances, I mean, it is a topic
that people don't want to discuss. And I think didn't
they say people would prefer to talk about sex, even
uncomfortable conversations about sex, versus uncomfortable conversations about money, Like
money is just this taboo topic that can eat away you.
So that's a really thank you for sharing that because
I think that's very relatable to a lot of people.
Speaker 2 (37:10):
Guys.
Speaker 1 (37:10):
While you were giving your answer, I kept nudging her
and whispering they're adults. Yeah, Like that was just a
grown up answer. I know, you know what I'm saying.
You hear all kinds of answers, but you.
Speaker 2 (37:19):
All, that's real life and adulthood right there. And that's
what I kept nudging her.
Speaker 6 (37:25):
Thanks. I told her that if we're buried together one day,
someone's going to put mister Garth by accident. And I'm told.
Speaker 5 (37:36):
He doesn't give a ship. He's like that when you
check into a hotel, if he calls them.
Speaker 6 (37:40):
By, they go, they go, mister, mister Garth, Hey, what's up?
Speaker 5 (37:45):
Man?
Speaker 2 (37:47):
I've been called mister before. I love it when they
call the room, would you like?
Speaker 4 (37:52):
Uh?
Speaker 2 (37:53):
Sent up?
Speaker 3 (37:54):
He never corrects them either. He thinks it's hilarious.
Speaker 5 (37:59):
A guy that doesn't that's not an issue for them, Like,
who cares?
Speaker 4 (38:03):
It's so nice. It is so nice. Yes, that is
not lost on me. By the way, thank you for
being always like never getting offended by that or having
your manhood, you know. But let's take it some way somehow,
So I appreciate that. How do you guys handle household
chores like cooking, cleaning, laundry, try.
Speaker 3 (38:24):
All that stuff that people fight about?
Speaker 6 (38:27):
I love? Can we do this once a week? This
is this is great. I'll start first. I do the poop.
I do a lot of poop, dog poop, peep. I
feed the dogs. I do the dishes. I load the
dishes in the morning because I'm the morning person. They
(38:49):
get a lot of dishes at night. I unload it
in the morning. I take out the trash.
Speaker 5 (38:57):
You're in charge of turning off the lights and are
huge doors because every no one turns off lights.
Speaker 6 (39:04):
I'm like that guy, like it's sign. I put a
big sign in the eighteen year old room before she
walks out. Lights.
Speaker 3 (39:12):
Lights, lights, that's funny.
Speaker 6 (39:17):
Yeah, she's constantly. Yeah, she's constantly.
Speaker 5 (39:21):
I'm a homemaker, so I'll do anything. I love it.
I love I would rather be doing like household chores
than most things.
Speaker 6 (39:30):
So it's wild.
Speaker 1 (39:32):
You've got a full house there. So, but the cooking
in the laundry has to be a big deal. How
how are those two things handled?
Speaker 5 (39:38):
Well, we let the girls do their own laundry, thank god,
and we alternate the lawn well, usually Tuesday night.
Speaker 6 (39:44):
Tuesday night's the laundry night, and she'll do it and
then I'll put it away.
Speaker 4 (39:49):
That's kind of how I us have like such an
awesome system, Like you even knew what night you do
laundry and you tag team everything.
Speaker 3 (39:57):
That's remarkable.
Speaker 1 (39:58):
Yeah, we have to admit a eighty percent of our
couples that were they were doing great now all the questions.
We got the laundry, and there are cracks and the relationship,
so it's very impressive to hear you will handle it
the way you do it.
Speaker 6 (40:12):
Don't get don't get me wrong. I hate laundry's that's
probably that's the thing. I hate them.
Speaker 5 (40:19):
I don't mind it, so it works out.
Speaker 1 (40:23):
Next question here, tell us how much time do you
find that you need, not just a loan, but away
from each other. It sounds like you get enough of
it just naturally, but do you find that you need
some time apart?
Speaker 5 (40:37):
I feel like we during our therapy work, we both
learned the concept of circle, square circle from our therapist
or my therapist who was also seeing you. But Wade
wait Davis, he taught us this that we're each our
own individual circles and then in the middle is the square,
(40:57):
and that square represents our our relationship together. So we
both have these circles that we on a daily basis
are filling with you know, work and doing things that
make us happy and you know, clipping off all those
pieces of the pie that make somebody whole. Right, So
those circles are whole and independent of one another. And
(41:19):
then that square in the middle is empty, and we
put into it whatever we want, like if well, however,
we want to nurture the relationship. So we try to
keep that square in the middle in our in our
sights and you know, in our goals, and we try
to put into that square. But I think that that
(41:40):
awareness for me was really essential because I am kind
of a co dependent person on only my family, like
certain like my kids and my husband. So I but
i'ms also okay with being codependent a little bit. I
I you know the word interdependent. Yes, yes, that's my
new that one, because I don't think codependency is like
(42:02):
a terrible thing. I love people and I want to
be around them.
Speaker 3 (42:06):
I'm the same way, Jenny, I'm the same way for me.
Speaker 6 (42:08):
I was I was. I needed that kind of independence
I needed in my time. I needed to go, you know,
be away and then so I can fill that bucket
and so that I could come back and and golf
for me kind of checks all those boxes. It checks
the social box, it checks the activity box, it checks
(42:29):
the mental health box, because you're so into that. So
we have worked that's a that's been a big part
of how we worked. Like when we first got together.
I used to go on these football trips with my
Oklahoma friends to go see ou football and we would
do that, and that was tough for her. She didn't
(42:50):
understand that. She couldn't understand that.
Speaker 5 (42:53):
I think that I was just in a different place
at that point, Like I wasn't interested in my husband
going off and getting drunk, and you know, he was
at a different place. And I think as we've matured,
those things have settled in and like eased up, so
they they aren't in, they aren't thorns.
Speaker 6 (43:12):
Correct, Yeah, it's not as it's no big deal now
like it it was so much of a big deal.
Speaker 5 (43:18):
But he's a Gemini and I'm an Aries. I don't
know if you I don't know that much about astrology,
but I know that Geminis are the people that have
two sides, right, which I didn't really know until like
three years in. I never I never was like, oh
my gosh, I'm seeing the other side of the Gemini
and I'm an Aries, which is very strong willed and
determined and you know, so it's an interesting combination.
Speaker 4 (43:43):
Super super independent le Leo and Aquarius is what we are. Gemini,
I'm not that good and that I only know about
it better.
Speaker 5 (43:57):
I wish I knew more about astrology because I think
it's super I just know geminis.
Speaker 6 (44:02):
Get a bad rap.
Speaker 4 (44:14):
The funny thing is the next couple of questions you
all have absolutely already answered, like have you ever broken up? Yes?
Speaker 3 (44:22):
Have you ever been a couple of therapy? Yes, But
we have this question.
Speaker 4 (44:26):
Have you ever in the middle of an argument threatened
to get divorced, threatened to leave the relationship outside of
when you.
Speaker 3 (44:34):
Guys actually did do that?
Speaker 4 (44:36):
Have you ever used or reached that point where you
threw that bomb at the in an argument?
Speaker 5 (44:43):
Oh? Yeah, in the earlier days, we really did. And
that was super hard for me because the stabilizing, like
to be told I'm out of here, this is even
doing this, or you know, it's the worst each other.
It's the worst feeling.
Speaker 6 (45:01):
Yeah, And I'm my biggest thing I have to work
on in my whole entire life is fight or flight.
It's just such a for me. When I leave a situation,
it's this like almost rebirth. It feels so good to me.
It's like it's crazy, but it's not healthy, you know
what I'm saying, Like, Yeah, so I would like in
(45:23):
those fights that where normally I would just leave and
go in the other room or just leave, I just
have chosen to just stay. And so for me just
to even stay even when nothing's getting solved and still
the shit dad has meant so much more to her
and stabilized her even though in my whole being it's
(45:44):
killing me.
Speaker 5 (45:44):
It's so interesting that we met, like we paired up
because I have abandonment issues from my father, initially getting
really sick and like kind of losing that father figure
even though he's stayed alive for a long time. I felt,
I think, abandoned as a young girl. And then relationships
happen and marriages and those kinds of things happened, so
(46:07):
it kind of embedded that further in me. But and
then I met somebody who likes to leave, Like who
doesn't who I'm I was in the beginning always like
well I think he might leave again, Like he's gonna leave,
so how can you you know?
Speaker 6 (46:22):
I mean, yeah, it's that's why I said at the
at the beginning of this content for the like the
first point part, I mean, in my life I have
felt complete content. There is no like I got it.
How am I getting out of this situation. Okay, what
good do I have one hundred thousand dollars where I
(46:44):
could just go make a new life somewhere.
Speaker 3 (46:48):
Every everybody has had that.
Speaker 6 (46:52):
These are the thoughts, right, but you've got to block those.
I mean, just this is this is the this is
these are the crazy wirings that I have that I
have to like work on.
Speaker 5 (47:02):
It's just me who's like, leaving isn't an option.
Speaker 6 (47:07):
You're either in or you're out, like, and it feels
so much better to have made that commitment and being like, man,
this is this is what I am in. I've made
these choices, and I am so better off.
Speaker 4 (47:18):
I totally get that. Like, I absolutely have that same
instinct like I have to get out of here. I
have to, like, I have to leave.
Speaker 3 (47:24):
And he's like, if you leave, you will not be
coming back.
Speaker 1 (47:28):
That's no, no, no wait wait, that's only if you
make the threat.
Speaker 7 (47:32):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (47:32):
I never put you out.
Speaker 4 (47:34):
Oh no no no, you're just saying if you walk
out that door, no, that it will be locked.
Speaker 5 (47:40):
The way.
Speaker 2 (47:40):
So today's point to hear.
Speaker 1 (47:42):
I was really interested Dave and hearing what you were
saying there about you know, the fight or flight thing
to where I'm never the one that's usually trying to fly.
But if you tell me you mentioned something about just
how you're able to move on, it's the next thing.
When someone tells me this relationship is over or I'm
done or I'm leaving, I'm already in my mind.
Speaker 2 (48:01):
How am I going to get her things back over
to her? Wow?
Speaker 1 (48:04):
If FedEx is open at a thirty tomorrow, like I'm done? Yeah, yeah,
not because I choose to, but I listen to someone.
I don't play that game, so we it's been interesting
the bag of Force I really set up, Dave when
you were talking about that fight or flight and how
your mind kind of works.
Speaker 3 (48:22):
Yeah, and it's not it. I don't even think it's
a game.
Speaker 4 (48:24):
I think you're it's your it's your ego protecting you,
it's my ego protecting me. It's your ego protect You
have to have your backup plan, you have to have
what am I doing now to protect myself? Because I'm
feeling really hurt and really scared? So what do I
do to protect myself? And everybody has different responses to that,
But thank you for like articulating that, because I think
a lot of people would relate to that, and I
(48:45):
think it's really cool that even though you have that
tendency as so many people do, as I do too,
that you say, I'm going to make a choice. I'm
in this relationship and I'm going to I am not
going to do this thing. It will make me feel
good right now because the harm it will do later
is not worth it.
Speaker 6 (49:04):
Yeah, that's that's such a good point that you mentioned ego,
because that's one hundred percent what it is. That's one
hundred percent what like it hits to your core and
that's just false evidence appearing real, you know what I mean.
Speaker 5 (49:17):
Oh, this is so good. He taught me that fear
that's the fault. Evidence is false evidence appearing real.
Speaker 3 (49:27):
Wow, that's so cool. I love that and it's so true.
Speaker 5 (49:34):
Yeah, you said a lot like when I'm when I'm
feeling fearful of anything, Like I'll just come back to
that and think, oh, okay.
Speaker 4 (49:43):
That's a good thing to say to yourself when you're
feeling that, especially if you Yeah, that's oh my gosh,
I'm using that.
Speaker 3 (49:49):
Thank you.
Speaker 2 (49:50):
We'll use it tomorrow.
Speaker 3 (49:51):
Yeah, morning tomorrow.
Speaker 1 (49:52):
All right, next last few things there, we'll get to
these last few here for you.
Speaker 2 (49:56):
What is it? And I want to use the word warn,
but what is it? If you saw a whole.
Speaker 1 (50:01):
Line of couples lined up at city Hall going into
get married at the justice of the piece, what is it?
You would want to go down that line and make
sure you tell every couple make sure you consider this,
think about this, or even warn them about don't do
it before they say I do.
Speaker 5 (50:19):
I see somebody getting married, I'm like, oh, don't do it.
Speaker 3 (50:23):
Oh, just wait a little while. Yeah, through some things first.
Speaker 5 (50:28):
But I think that's just like I don't think that's true.
I think that's the bitter miss in me. But I
feel like now with the relationship that we've developed into,
I could give them tips and pointers all day long about,
you know, just how to have a more harmonious life together.
Speaker 6 (50:49):
I would just I would say, are you ready to work?
Because it's like it's not for everyone. I mean, I
don't know. I mean somebody way back in the day
we don't even know, said you guys get married and
then you do this, and then this is how it's
supposed to be the social whatever. I don't know if
(51:11):
it's for everyone. I would just say, if you're willing
to commit and make and that will fulfill you and
the work will fulfill you. Then go, yeah, do it.
But it's yeah, that's.
Speaker 4 (51:23):
So good, Dave, because we watch all these relationship shows
are one of our favorites is Married at First Sight,
and we keep hearing all the couples say, it's okay,
you guys love it too, But it's just like.
Speaker 3 (51:36):
Dumbist line, I'm somebody's wife.
Speaker 2 (51:39):
The dumb one is we go crazy. I didn't think
marriage would be this hard.
Speaker 4 (51:43):
Yeah, everyone says, I didn't think it was going to
be hard, and they they love the idea and the
concept of being someone's wife or having a husband, but
it's almost like anybody could fill the spot.
Speaker 3 (51:53):
They just want to be married.
Speaker 4 (51:55):
But what people think is just going to be this
immediate union where you just have a partner who's all
always on your side, and that is just so not true.
Speaker 6 (52:04):
We probably we could have been on that show. That's
how we were, and then that's probably the feelings that
we had the same things like well, we're married, we're
husband wife and then.
Speaker 3 (52:19):
Oh crap, now this is actually hard. What am I
supposed to do?
Speaker 4 (52:22):
Now? This isn't what I signed up for I think
is something that other people say too on the show
that actually is exactly what you signed up for. You
just didn't know what you were signing up for.
Speaker 5 (52:31):
No, it's hard, it's hard work, and it's like you're
spending twenty for seven with someone that is a completely
different individual. Like and when you get married, people like
expect us, people to be like, oh, we're married, so
we think the same, we have all the same goals.
We are one. No, we're not one. We are two
(52:54):
people that are choosing to live our lives together every day.
And that's a lot. That's a lot to be with
somebody that much.
Speaker 4 (53:03):
Oh, and it's it's all about expectations, isn't it. And
people we just when you're young, or when you when
you're you got your your honeymoon phase in full swing,
you just aren't thinking about what's going to happen in
the years to come.
Speaker 3 (53:17):
So that's cool, all right, She's not going to.
Speaker 5 (53:18):
Be rainbows and unicorns all the time.
Speaker 4 (53:21):
I know.
Speaker 6 (53:21):
But it's such a good feeling.
Speaker 4 (53:23):
Isn't it.
Speaker 3 (53:23):
Though I know it's addictive.
Speaker 4 (53:25):
Okay, final question, and this is a cheesy question, but
we've loved the answers.
Speaker 3 (53:32):
What would you each say.
Speaker 4 (53:35):
Is the secret or the thing your thing? Why your
relationship has lasted through the ups and downs, and that
you two are a successful, happy couple.
Speaker 3 (53:48):
What is the secret to your success.
Speaker 6 (53:50):
Day by day by day by day. I think the
I I hate to keep saying commitment, but I think
we're we're staying committed to each other, and we're staying
committed to the goals that we have set. We've set
like a tenure plan right now and we're kind of
(54:12):
moving down there. So I'm helping her, she's supporting me.
We're just the support is kind of and we're very
excited about just the future the girls, her business, my business.
It's just that's why I said content because like I'm
(54:33):
we're good right now and we're very excited about the future.
Like I don't know, is something like gonna happen? If
am I waiting for something to happen?
Speaker 5 (54:40):
Like free will? It's human beings. We have free will.
So I think I had to learn that the hard way,
like when he left and realizing, oh, you can leave
any time you want, Like it's a choice. It's a
choice to stay together every day. And I think that
that is one of the things, and also treat your
(55:01):
spouse like they're your best friend because they are. Like
at the end of the day, that's the person that
gets you. I feel so confident that he understands me
like nobody else does. And I turned to him for
advice on how to just like think like a normal person,
because sometimes I can, you know, go.
Speaker 6 (55:24):
And like, no, that's not what we do here.
Speaker 5 (55:31):
Really keep me grounded, so I.
Speaker 6 (55:35):
Forget that that's not normal.
Speaker 4 (55:40):
Well, I love the day by day like you just
take it one day at a time, and you choose
each other and you love each other.
Speaker 6 (55:47):
You know what.
Speaker 4 (55:47):
We learned so much about the two of you, Jenny
and Dave, and so has everyone else listening.
Speaker 3 (55:53):
So thank you for being open and being real. It's
not easy.
Speaker 4 (55:58):
It's not easy at all to talk about these things,
but everybody goes through it, and so I just I
love how relatable and down to earth and real both
of you were.
Speaker 3 (56:07):
So thank you well you too as well.
Speaker 6 (56:09):
We always we had a blast when we were in
San Francisco. You guys are great.
Speaker 5 (56:15):
It was fun.
Speaker 6 (56:15):
It was too short. I know you guys were tired,
but we need to make another run run one day.
Speaker 1 (56:21):
See now, We're going to be annoying next time we
see you because now we have all these relationship questions.
Speaker 2 (56:26):
Ask you guys.
Speaker 3 (56:28):
Remember that time.
Speaker 4 (56:29):
It's like we've just been along this ride with you
for all these years, and so now we know all
your history, we can have really fun, in depth conversation
next time we see you too, which hopefully will be soon.
Speaker 2 (56:39):
Yes, guys, thank you all so much.
Speaker 1 (56:40):
We will see y'all soon, having us City appreciate it.
Speaker 5 (56:44):
Bye,
Hey, there are folks in this episode nine to two
to one. Oh No. Our Glove series internues with the
love stories of two folks now who have been in
a relationship a marriage for ten years. But get this,
one of those years he rode around with their divorce
papers in the back of his truck. Yes, welcome to
(00:24):
this special cuffings. He's an edition of ABN TJ.
Speaker 2 (00:28):
Robs.
Speaker 1 (00:28):
This has been a blast. This was our final couple. Boy,
they went out with a bang. Didn't I love these two?
Speaker 3 (00:34):
And certainly did.
Speaker 4 (00:35):
Jenny Garth and her husband Dave Abrams. They have a
nine year age difference. Jenny is nine years older than Dave. Yes,
she already had three kids from a previous marriage coming
into this relationship. And one of my favorite moments is
when we asked about whether or not these two had
chemistry when they first met. Because this was a double
(00:57):
blind date. They were set up to meet one another,
and the moment Jenny says she saw Dave, she said,
oh hell no, oh hell no.
Speaker 1 (01:04):
You know, we we get into this in the interview
we do with her, but we have spent some time
with her over the past year, and we've heard this
story from her in person. Now you'll hear how she
answers the question he and what do you say? She said, oh,
hell no, Well, she was just like it.
Speaker 3 (01:18):
Was a hard note for her when she saw him.
Speaker 1 (01:20):
But then we've talked to her in person and asked
her about it. She said what she saw, she was like.
Speaker 4 (01:25):
Like, she right, But she goes on to describe him
as tall, dark and handsome with a pea coat, who
looked like an actor, and she was just like.
Speaker 1 (01:32):
Ugh, yeah, but for a lot of people that would
sound awesome. He sounds great. He's a good looking, tall,
god great guy. But for her, in that world, she
was immediately turned off by someone who looked like he
was in that world.
Speaker 4 (01:45):
Yes, because she, of course has spent most of her
at least at that point, most of her life in
front of the camera in Hollywood.
Speaker 3 (01:52):
Man, I grew up watching her.
Speaker 4 (01:53):
I'm the same age as her, so I grew up
with her watching her do nine O two and Ozero.
But yeah, she was just wanting out of that whole scene,
and he looked as though he was a part of it,
even though he isn't.
Speaker 2 (02:05):
He isn't.
Speaker 1 (02:06):
But these two they were the last now in our
series and they were. I said this to you during
the interview. I leaned over and I said, these are adults,
like they are grown folks who've been through a lot.
They've been through previous relationships and marriages, they broke up
for a little while, you got step kids involved. There's
so much going on. But they also show us that, yes,
(02:27):
despite all of that, there's still something to them that
is evident in the conversation we're having. It's not just
a matter we're still together or we've been together two years. No,
you can see them while they sit next to each
other and how they talk to each other, that there
is something still special going on with these two. I
love it.
Speaker 4 (02:40):
It is inspirational to know that you can get that
low and be that bad off where you actually have
divorce papers and you are not talking, you are not
seeing each other for over a year, and here they are,
six years after that tumultuous year. They can sit there
and be in love and so comfortable with one another,
(03:01):
and the trust that they've built up from going through
that trunk is evident and speaks to the strength of
their relationship today. So, without further ado, please take a
listen to our conversation with Jenny Garth and Dave Abrams.
Jenny and Dave are with us now. Thank you all
for agreeing to do this, and thank you for being
with us today.
Speaker 5 (03:22):
Absolutely, you're welcome. We love seeing you too.
Speaker 3 (03:26):
I we love seeing you.
Speaker 4 (03:27):
It's been so much fun to see couples sitting next
to each other, interacting with each other while answering the questions.
It's a very different experience than just interviewing someone one
on one. So this, we promise this will be fun.
Speaker 3 (03:39):
All right, we'll start off.
Speaker 4 (03:40):
With each of you give me three words to describe
the state of your relationship right now.
Speaker 3 (03:48):
Who wants to go first?
Speaker 6 (03:51):
Okay, the first three words that pop in my head,
I would say stability. That just popped in my head.
I don't know if this is a negative word, but
content is like that was another one. No, but it
just I'm I'm I've been like mulling over like how
(04:11):
I'm very content and and it's like it's it's a
weird feeling, because when are you you know, some something's happening,
But no, no, no, I'm feeling like trying to understand, trying to
understand the words I'm not.
Speaker 5 (04:28):
I've only gotten.
Speaker 6 (04:30):
A content, stability, and I would say, uh, support is
another one. Oh well you yeah, I went first, So
I think support is right now. I feel like with
her supporting me and me supporting her with all the
(04:51):
you know stuff she has going and yeah, and it
is the same with me as well. Her support for
me is yeah, full on and that's been That was
one of the big things early in our relationship was
sometimes I felt like I wasn't supported.
Speaker 1 (05:06):
So okay, that's just question one.
Speaker 2 (05:11):
We just don't question one. Guys.
Speaker 1 (05:13):
All right, Jenny, where are your three words support?
Speaker 7 (05:17):
Support, I wou'd say humorous, we laugh a lot, and reliable.
Speaker 5 (05:28):
We are we are we always do what we say
we're going to do. We're always where we say we're
going to be, and that gives both of us, I think,
such a sense of stability and that reassurance.
Speaker 6 (05:40):
There's next places we are actually ever at any good point, so.
Speaker 5 (05:47):
We don't we don't stray far from our so forth.
Speaker 1 (05:48):
Yeah, gotchaka, next question here and we this is going
to be fun because we have heard part of the
story about how you all met. But the question that
we've asked all the couples is was there immediate chemistry
when you first.
Speaker 5 (06:02):
Met you want me to go first?
Speaker 3 (06:04):
No, it was a blind date, right, it was.
Speaker 5 (06:09):
A blind double date. And I think I told you
guys this once on some other podcasts we do. But
we we talked about the fact that I walked into
the setup location, the restaurant, the bar, and I walked
in and I immediately saw a tall, handsome, like actor
looking guy with scrubble pea coat, so pretentious, and I
(06:32):
was like, oh, I thought, no, no, so yeah, that
was my first I disagree.
Speaker 6 (06:41):
I think that it was.
Speaker 5 (06:42):
There was a disagree with my reaction.
Speaker 6 (06:44):
No chemistry, The question was chemistry. I feel like there
was chemistry. We were just kind of like waiting for it.
Because after we left that date with the two people
that we were on the date with, we went and
had a drink by ourselves, and that's when, Yeah, we
had a lot of chemistry. We didn't stop seeing each other,
(07:06):
like and then we got married.
Speaker 3 (07:10):
So there, who said I love you first?
Speaker 6 (07:14):
Probably me?
Speaker 5 (07:15):
I was thinking, it's probably me. Wow, is it bad
that we don't remember?
Speaker 1 (07:21):
No this, We've talked all these couples. This is the
first time there wasn't an immediate Ah, it's usually is
the guy.
Speaker 3 (07:28):
It was usually the guy.
Speaker 2 (07:30):
But yeah, okay, but you all can't remember who it was.
Speaker 6 (07:34):
No, I remember so much vividly. I don't. I feel
like it was me, but you feel like it was you.
Speaker 5 (07:41):
I don't. I don't know. I think I blocked that
on my memory.
Speaker 1 (07:46):
How about I put it this way, you all knowing
what you know of each other and your relationship. Now,
who is it more likely? You think probably said it first.
Speaker 5 (07:56):
I feel like it's more likely me because I'm a
little bit more of a communicator, like a clear shooter,
you know. I'm like, look, I love you, let's not
waste any more time.
Speaker 6 (08:08):
Yeah, that's true, That could be true. Yeah, I agree
with that, all right. She's very yeah, very direct.
Speaker 4 (08:16):
That is a good thing in a relationship. How long
did you all date before you got engaged? How long
were you engaged before you got married.
Speaker 5 (08:25):
We were engaged.
Speaker 6 (08:27):
We got months after we met December, January, February. We
were engaged in March. We got married in July.
Speaker 5 (08:37):
Wow, six months and got married at six months six months?
Speaker 4 (08:42):
Did you have any reservations at that, like, for having
such an accelerated timeline.
Speaker 6 (08:48):
Uh? Yeah, yeah, yeah, I mean, because I mean it
bit us in the butt like three years down the
road because we didn't I mean, we broke up for
like eight.
Speaker 5 (08:57):
Months a year. It was twelve months, actually.
Speaker 6 (08:59):
It was it was like eight months, just twelve.
Speaker 3 (09:02):
You broke up. You were already married though, so you
were you were separated, separated.
Speaker 5 (09:06):
Yeah, but I think that's because we did jump into
it full and fast like that, and I think we
could have used a little more time to understand get
to know each other and our problem solving where we
each were individually, like in our growth and my healing,
and you know, we just could have used some more time. Probably.
Speaker 6 (09:25):
I had a lot of stuff that, you know, that
I had to kind of deal with that I didn't
deal with in my single days and other relationships that
you know, the same patterns were happening. I had to
look at myself and also she had to look at herself.
And then it's been great ever since. So it was
(09:47):
I mean, it's crazy, but it was such a Our
journey has been such a blessing. I mean, I know
it sounds cheesy to say that, but it's it's true.
I wouldn't have changed that.
Speaker 4 (09:56):
That totally makes sense. What happened in those eight or
ten months. It was the difference that made the difference
that now look at you, how many years later, still together,
still happy.
Speaker 3 (10:07):
What happened during that period of time when you separated.
Speaker 6 (10:09):
Been back together for like six years during the break
when we were broken up.
Speaker 5 (10:16):
I think we just both, like we said, did a
lot of personal growth. I think that prior to the breakup,
to the separation, i'll call it, we had been going
to couple therapy and that wasn't working for us like that.
He did not like that and so and it didn't
it didn't help us. So we thought he didn't want
to do it anymore. And I thought, well, why don't
(10:37):
I just work on myself and you work on yourself,
and they'll see what happens and see if that if
we uncover some things, some truths about ourselves that we
need to look at and you know, grow through. And
I think that that's one of the big things that
happened while we were separated. He had his divorce papers
in a Manila envelope in the back you know how
(10:58):
you're he has a truck and then in the back
of the truck seat there's a pocket like in the seat. Yeah,
the Manila envelope with our divorce papers completely ready to
sign here, drove them around for months and months and
months in this car. Yeah.
Speaker 6 (11:12):
So I filed in like April. There was like you know,
the first four months where it's anger and just I
don't want to talk to you. I'm done, I'm blah blah.
So I got papers drawn up in like April. I
didn't know what I was doing. The guy was like, well,
you have community properties, Like I don't care, just do
whatever is the easiest fast trap.
Speaker 5 (11:32):
Oh my god.
Speaker 6 (11:33):
And then in December January we started kind of dating
again and becoming like trying to do like we made
it a point to be like a normal couple. I
had a little apartment, I had gotten a dog, like
I was going through something, and so she you guys.
Speaker 5 (11:53):
He got a dog. While wait, it's a dog. Yeah,
oh wait, know you got a new truck, a giant
truck that doesn't even fit on the streets of Los Angeles.
Speaker 2 (12:04):
I mean, okay, he was going through something.
Speaker 3 (12:05):
Yeah, okay, you is the dog still with you?
Speaker 4 (12:08):
All?
Speaker 5 (12:09):
Yeah?
Speaker 6 (12:09):
Yeah, he's our son now. Yeah, he's like he's in
love more. He's in love with Jenny. Like that's his person.
Speaker 1 (12:18):
We're more concerned that you're in love with her and
she's still your person. Yeah, mister Manila envelope.
Speaker 5 (12:25):
Jesus seriously, guys, the Manila envelope was still in there
like a year I think after.
Speaker 6 (12:31):
Yeah, we got back. I just sat there. I don't
throw away a lot of stuff.
Speaker 3 (12:37):
That might be one thing you should throw away though.
Speaker 6 (12:40):
Yeah, it's gone. The truck's gone.
Speaker 1 (12:45):
Wow, guys, I think we could rap now because you
all just answered questions eight through forty.
Speaker 2 (13:00):
Next question here is there? I'm not sure.
Speaker 1 (13:03):
Is there an age difference and has it played any
role in your relationship?
Speaker 6 (13:09):
Yes, I'm nine.
Speaker 5 (13:11):
Years older than Dave.
Speaker 6 (13:13):
So when we met, I was thirty four, she was
forty three, and then we got married. I was thirty
five four five he got married. Oh my god, I can't.
Speaker 5 (13:23):
When we go back in time and I realized how
young you were, it freaks me out a little bit.
Speaker 6 (13:29):
I was a young thirty five.
Speaker 1 (13:32):
Yeah, you know what, that made complete sense to me.
I didn't get close to the beginning to get my
ish together in life until I was probably thirty eight
or thirty nine. I was a mess, so that it
makes perfect sense.
Speaker 6 (13:48):
Yeah, I mean, yeah, that was that was totally true
with me, and then jumping into the situation where I
had three step children the ages of like sixteen eleven
or or Lola was just twelve, and then Fiona was
a seven eight, and then taking all that on and
the dogs and then this celebrity and this celebrity that
(14:10):
I had just come into her life, and then like
paparazzi and like stuff like that, and then.
Speaker 5 (14:17):
It was a lot.
Speaker 6 (14:18):
It was a lot.
Speaker 3 (14:19):
Yeah, that makes a lot of sense.
Speaker 4 (14:21):
So I mean, that's that's admirable that you all took
a beat and it was probably scary as hell and
awful for that period of time.
Speaker 3 (14:28):
But look at you now.
Speaker 4 (14:29):
That's that's really impressive and it's inspirational for folks who
are going through tough times.
Speaker 3 (14:33):
But you can, you know, you can figure it out.
Speaker 5 (14:36):
Yeah you want to.
Speaker 3 (14:37):
That's really cool.
Speaker 5 (14:38):
I didn't get through it. But back to your point
about the age thing, So they're having that gap in
age there there have been times when it comes up.
I think not as much anymore because, like we said,
he has done some growing up. I've stopped growing up
and you keep growing up, which is great. So now
we're kind of like in the middle.
Speaker 6 (14:58):
Yeah, I agree, the age difference. I never really felt
I never really that wasn't that wasn't really a big
issue to me. It was a bigger issue for everybody
else because they would, you know, they would talk about
it more in the news or whatever. When we were
first together, it was a thing.
Speaker 4 (15:17):
But funny enough, if a man was nine years older
than the woman, no one would say, oh, that's just
when It's like.
Speaker 6 (15:23):
No one would that and I no one would care,
and no it ever gets talked about. But I mean,
I think there was a couple other celebrities that Kristin
Cavaleria was dating like a twenty five year old and
that was all over the news.
Speaker 3 (15:35):
Yeah, no, I hear you.
Speaker 4 (15:37):
Why did you two and you made the decision very quickly,
as you just told us, Why did you two want
to be married? And where do you think the two
of you would be if you had just chosen to
stay as a couple and never actually officially legally get married.
Speaker 5 (15:55):
I think for me, having three you know, grows who
were young young tweens and teenagers, it was weird for
me to just, based on my morals and my upbringings
to have a man in the house that I wasn't
fully committed to or he wasn't fully committed to me,
because I didn't want to give them the messaging. That's
(16:16):
what was one of the things that was important for me,
And maybe that was one of the things that you know,
caused us to rush into it because marriage was more
important to me. I'm just I'm a Midwestern I like
to be married. I like to have full on commitment,
and I like to know I'm not wasting my time
with somebody, you know what I mean.
Speaker 6 (16:36):
So for me that yeah, yeah, I mean I think
for me, I didn't. I didn't think about marriage. I
didn't really think about kids. I didn't. I just was
kind of, you know, plugging away and this kind of
just like happened, and I just kind of went with it.
(16:57):
I got into it.
Speaker 1 (16:58):
No appreciate the honesty of that answer, really there, Jenny,
to be able to talk about it in such a way.
Speaker 2 (17:04):
Yet, you know what, we probably.
Speaker 1 (17:05):
Because of you wanted marriage and because of the way
you came up, you probably rushed into the marriage.
Speaker 2 (17:11):
That was a very honest answer.
Speaker 6 (17:12):
I appreciate that one hundred percent. I mean I was
so in love and so like committed. At that time,
I was like, let's let me do everything I can
to show this woman that I am this person and
I am committed. And then you know, obviously after the
(17:36):
purple roses whatever the saying is, and you've hit reality
and then you're yeah, it's a lot. But I think
looking back, I wouldn't have changed anything. But I love
what we did.
Speaker 3 (17:50):
That's very cool.
Speaker 4 (17:52):
So we I always preface this next question with we
ask everyone this question, answer it however you'd like. But
how would you describe your sex life and how has
it changed over the years.
Speaker 5 (18:04):
Well, when we got together. When we first got together,
I was in my forties, and you know what they
say about ladies in their forties, late forties, Like I
was ready all the time, right, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 4 (18:15):
Yes, yeah, women come into their sexual powers in their
thirties and forties. Yeah.
Speaker 5 (18:22):
And I think that you had I don't know.
Speaker 6 (18:25):
Where you were this like in the beginning. Yeah, yeah,
I mean it's always good at the beginning, and then.
Speaker 3 (18:31):
You know, and then you know, yeah, I mean, you know.
Speaker 6 (18:38):
We don't really were We don't really talk a lot
about sex and stuff like that. I'm pretty modest, I
don't I've never you know, been very wealth Yeah, totally,
but I would say that it's definitely gotten better. There's
definitely been challenges with menopause and certain things and.
Speaker 5 (18:56):
Teenage kids in the house all the time.
Speaker 6 (18:59):
We have never we never have an empty house. So
it's like, I mean even the twenty two year old
those with us, which I love that she's here. Her
boyfriend's also here like a lot, which I love him too,
but it's a full house.
Speaker 5 (19:15):
Does that have effect? Yeah, we go on weekend ways.
Speaker 6 (19:19):
We just did, like just like we just went to
Palm Springs for like a night just to get out,
just to be like, we throw the phone away, we
just need to get away. And that was great. But
that we have.
Speaker 5 (19:31):
To get speak quiet all the time. That I hope
my kids aren't listening to this. You don't need to
be quiet. All our balls are shared by two teenage girls.
Like it's a thing.
Speaker 3 (19:42):
Yeah, that's tough.
Speaker 6 (19:43):
And we know this because they've said, well, why were
you guys arguing this? I was like, it wasn't what
are you talking about?
Speaker 5 (19:50):
That was Now when we have sex, we argue just
to fool them.
Speaker 6 (19:54):
Oh my god, we turn on the TV. We've last
the TV.
Speaker 2 (20:01):
This is a real relationship here.
Speaker 1 (20:03):
This is great, all right, next question here, aside from
sex though physical touch, how important is physical touch? For example,
walking down the street, do you find yourself you're always
holding hands. If you're in the room, do you find
yourselves rubbing up against each other? How important is that
to you?
Speaker 5 (20:19):
Well, I know you two are touchers. You like physical connection.
I love that about your couple. But we always hold hands.
I think when we met, I was like, here's a
couple things that are really important to me. I like
to have my handheld, and I like someone to open
the door for me, like all the time. Never I
(20:40):
never touch a doorknob, Like that's kind of like my dream.
And he was all for that. We hold hands constantly,
and I'm a lot more touchy, I think than he is.
But also we're very independent, so there's times when I
don't need it, he doesn't need it, but I should
need that hug at the end of the day or
before big thing I need.
Speaker 6 (21:01):
Yeah, I've kind of been, i mean, growing into being
more affectionate, especially with the girls. Like you know, I'm
not I'm not very affectionate. I mean I show my
love and how I do like I show up for people,
I'm there. That's kind of like my showing like affection.
I know she always needs like a hug, so it's
(21:23):
like tuning that in just to go hug her out
of the blue, or like give one of the girls
a hug, Like that's a big thing for me, just
to even hug.
Speaker 5 (21:31):
Like it's kind of like the way you grew up.
Probably physical, No, we snuggle my my kids and I
snuggle constantly, so that physical touch is really important.
Speaker 3 (21:43):
That's cute. I love that.
Speaker 4 (21:45):
So we know that you pretend to fight when you're
having sex, but how often do.
Speaker 3 (21:49):
You actually fight?
Speaker 4 (21:54):
So? Yeah, how often do you actually fight? And is
there something you fight about?
Speaker 3 (21:58):
Most?
Speaker 5 (22:00):
I think we argue about the girls, one the youngest,
probably in particular, just because of maybe not understanding I
understand her in a different way than he might be
able to. What else is there we do? We argue
about money? No, because we're kind of his her and hours.
Speaker 6 (22:22):
So yeah, I mean, what do we are alowed to argue?
Speaker 2 (22:28):
Golf?
Speaker 5 (22:28):
Golf?
Speaker 6 (22:29):
That's what he was going to say, golf.
Speaker 5 (22:31):
I'm a golf widow.
Speaker 4 (22:33):
Oh, I was trying to figure out he golfs too much?
Speaker 3 (22:36):
And it takes it takes what six hours, seven hours?
Speaker 6 (22:39):
I mean, I'm I'm on a golf team and then
we're in season right now, and then you have to
have a dinner after you play on Thursday, and it's
a bunch of other clubs golf.
Speaker 3 (22:51):
Then there's the nineteenth hole.
Speaker 2 (22:53):
I know, one night a week.
Speaker 6 (22:57):
Well, in this it's not.
Speaker 5 (22:58):
A nice t J. It's damn day.
Speaker 2 (23:01):
Okay, so one day a week.
Speaker 6 (23:03):
Yeah, but yeah, and then tournaments and stuff like that.
It can be like a weekend. But but that's it.
Like I only go to golf work, okay, don't.
Speaker 5 (23:12):
I used to care about it a lot more. Now
I'm so busy. I'm like, go do your thing. I'll
see you later. What bring me dinner? I don't know
what's happening.
Speaker 6 (23:20):
And it's interesting. I've been I've been sober for like
two and a half almost three years, so like being
around this environment where guys are just getting trash, I
just haven't. I just sit there like it was.
Speaker 5 (23:34):
He doesn't really, Yeah, I don't care get involved with
that part anymore, which is such. I mean, like I
didn't never know jumping onto that topic, like I didn't
never know how insecure. That environment made me not insecure,
but just unstable, like destabilized. When like my husband would
go and you know, drink with the guys at the club,
(23:57):
I worry, like I worry about I'm driving, and I
just I don't know, I think that since he stopped
drinking by his choice, it was, it's been such a
secure feeling for me. I love it. I stopped drinking too,
So we're in it together.
Speaker 3 (24:12):
Oh, very cool.
Speaker 1 (24:13):
All right, Well, next question here, When was the last time,
I don't know how, Maybe this was this morning, or
maybe it was weeks ago, the last time you remember
having to say I'm sorry to the other And what
was it for?
Speaker 6 (24:26):
Oh, that's a good question. I feel like I just
said I'm sorry for something.
Speaker 1 (24:32):
Probably it was probably on golf day.
Speaker 5 (24:37):
He doesn't apologize for that.
Speaker 6 (24:41):
What was it recently? It was like it was recently?
It was like this past weekend.
Speaker 5 (24:46):
I don't know.
Speaker 6 (24:46):
Oh was it Sunday morning? And I was so frustrated
because it was the game. I went into work and
then I came back and then they were reupholsteraing shared
so everything.
Speaker 5 (25:01):
Sunday you're not supposed to do any household.
Speaker 6 (25:04):
Chores my daughter Lola and her are constantly they work
on the brand together, but they're constantly doing like projects,
like they don't stop. Like they took apart this these
two seats that were pink and re upholstered them. When
I got my upholster guy, he was like, we could
I could do it for nine hundred bucks, but.
Speaker 5 (25:25):
We wanted to do it ourselves.
Speaker 6 (25:26):
So they couldn't do it themselves. So they needed a
little bit of help. But Sunday morning, the.
Speaker 5 (25:31):
Staple or gun, those are really hard to use, you
guys on my hand is not that strong anymore.
Speaker 6 (25:36):
And then now they want to cut the barstools three
inches off the metal, which they need a welder to
do that.
Speaker 5 (25:43):
So they asked what time when you were? Sorry lost?
Speaker 6 (25:48):
I think it was Sunday.
Speaker 5 (25:49):
I was.
Speaker 6 (25:50):
I had a little bit of a temper tandrent because
then the internet. Then they had the Internet guy coming
over on Sunday on a Sunday.
Speaker 1 (26:00):
The Internet guy on a Sunday Jednie.
Speaker 5 (26:03):
Appointment up and then he got mad at oh happening?
Speaker 6 (26:06):
Well they were well, they were late, and then this
guy's like, well we got to run these wires. It's noon.
I gotta be so. Yeah, I did say I was
sorry because you were being a little bio because I
was being a bitch a little bit. But I had
a lot of anxiety about the Eagles and then you know,
(26:28):
facilitating people at work, and so yeah, you know.
Speaker 4 (26:31):
I think it takes a lot, though, to admit that
you know, and to say you're sorry.
Speaker 3 (26:36):
I think that's cool and that's what it's all about.
Speaker 6 (26:38):
Right.
Speaker 1 (26:38):
Oh man, I'm if I had to be asked this question.
I didn't think about until now. The last time I
had to say I'm sorry was for something similar. I apologize.
We get up two three in the morning sometimes don't
get a lot of sleep, and I was just frantic
and I was not in a good way. I'm slamming
stuff in a hurry. And I later just said, you
know what, I'm sorry for how I was. I was
(26:59):
not in a good way.
Speaker 3 (27:00):
It's amazing to hear it. I wasn't even upset about it.
Speaker 4 (27:03):
I knew that you hadn't slept that much, and it
was cool to have you even say that when I
wasn't even I didn't even say anything, But it makes
it makes a big difference.
Speaker 5 (27:10):
Yeah, I think saying sorry is so underrated because it
really makes the other person feel seen and respected. I
think when there's a conflict, to work it out on
your own and come back to the person and have
that clear conversation with like, I'm not going to point
the finger at you in this situation. I'm going to
point the thumb and look at how I what my
(27:32):
bark wasn't And it just feels really reassuring to have that.
I think I apologize to him this morning because he
walked into the bedroom with this giant cup of coffee
from Starbucks and he was just sitting there holding it
and drinking it. And I just stared at her and
I was like, where's Mike. You didn't get me any
You didn't get me a tea? And he said no,
(27:52):
I didn't. He's like, oh you didn't. You didn't you
went to Starbus, you didn't get meyone? He said, no,
I didn't think of you. And then so I go, oh, mad, yeah,
not terribly. Well.
Speaker 6 (28:05):
I was joking with her.
Speaker 5 (28:07):
He was joking, I'm sorry that I believed you.
Speaker 3 (28:12):
Basically that's hilarious. I said, but that's cute. You still
have a little humor.
Speaker 4 (28:19):
You knew she might get mad, but it would be
a funny moment when she realized.
Speaker 2 (28:23):
I get it right. You said, I'm sorry that I
thought you were in Is that right?
Speaker 6 (28:28):
Yeah?
Speaker 5 (28:29):
Okay, got it like that, apology.
Speaker 2 (28:33):
Sorry about that day? All right?
Speaker 1 (28:34):
Next up here speak Well, we'll stick with the mad
and the fight theme for a second. This will be
the last one in that regard. Do you make a
point of not going to bed angry or do sometimes
you do.
Speaker 5 (28:44):
It sometimes to be angry.
Speaker 6 (28:48):
Yes, I mean I would like to make it a
point not to go to bed angry, but sometimes we
do go to bed angry.
Speaker 5 (28:53):
You just gotta call it. Sometimes.
Speaker 6 (28:56):
You ever have the you know, where it's it's getting
late and you know you're sitting on the side of
the bed and you're like, well, I'm going to go
in there, but I'm not. I'm just going to stay
in this, And then you're just like, well, we're exhausted.
What's good?
Speaker 5 (29:12):
So? Or did you know those times when when like
my world would be so going so fast that it's
not until I lay my head on the pillow that
I kind of assess things with regard to like what
we're going through and what we're talking about, where we are,
and that's when I'm like, so should we talk about
the thing?
Speaker 6 (29:31):
And maybe at that point where I'm like, no, I
had all the like, honey, honey talk, yeah, that's the thing,
Like I should be better at that, But that is
that is where I've kind of had more time because
she is so busy and when I'm done, I'm done,
and she's yeah she wants to talk at that point
(29:52):
where it's like midnight and I'm like, no, I'm out.
Speaker 3 (30:04):
What do you each love the most about the other?
Speaker 5 (30:09):
I love that Dave is fun. He's fun. He makes
me laugh in every situation. He's like he's like a
walking Saturday Night Live show all the time. He's always
doing like voices and mimic. You know, He's just fun
to hang out with. He's brought such a levity into
(30:30):
our home. And you know, because the kids and I
went through a really hard time with the divorce and
the family's breaking up and everything, and when he came in,
that's what we all noticed that we all just felt
happier when he was around. So that's one of the things.
Speaker 6 (30:44):
I love about Well, Honey, I'm gonna cry at nine
o'clock in the morning.
Speaker 5 (30:50):
I also love that he's tall because I am short
and I can't reach a lot of things, so that's
really helpful.
Speaker 6 (31:00):
I love most about Jenny is she's fierce. I don't know,
like she's she just when she says she's going to
do something, she does it. Her loyalty is unmatched, and
I've learned a lot about that. It's almost loyal to
a fault, but I'd rather do that than the opposite.
(31:23):
And she's had the same people around her for thirty
something years and that says a lot about who she
is and her character, and I've learned a lot. Yeah,
I mean, I love I just you know, when you
she's just my human And so even though I tried
(31:45):
to get away, just that's just the way it is.
Speaker 4 (31:50):
You know.
Speaker 1 (31:50):
It wasn't lost on us either, Jenny. Since we've been
asking questions, there were some you deferred and you pause
and you say, hey, you go first, but we when
she asked what do you love most about the other?
You jumped in immediately and had something you knew and
you wanted to speak first on that. So that wasn't law.
That was a very cute moment to see. We got
to turn to some practical stuff. Now the household. You kind
(32:12):
of alluded to it, but this happens in every relationship.
How do you handle household finances together separate?
Speaker 2 (32:20):
How does it work?
Speaker 6 (32:22):
Well, it's a little different. I mean it's different.
Speaker 5 (32:26):
Situation is different. Pres is not traditional.
Speaker 6 (32:30):
I would say, no, I contribute to household around our house.
But if I wasn't married to my wife, I would
not be living in this house. Let's just say so.
Speaker 5 (32:45):
Probably stepped into a lifestyle that he did not see coming,
and I would never ever expect him to being that.
I I've always been independent financially since I started making money.
I always will take care myself and my kids. So
I never would expect him to come in and take
care of me, or take care of the girls, or
(33:07):
pay fifty percent of what or what take over the
payments for this lifestyle that I've created for myself and
the girls.
Speaker 6 (33:14):
So we did. Yeah, we did have some resentment. She
had some resentment towards me a couple of years ago,
just because it was like after COVID, I'm in the
restaurant business. I lost one, I sold another one, and
then I was starting a new one. So we had
we had to go through a lot of like growing
(33:36):
pains to where we got now to where it on
that front, we're very secure in what our contributions are
to this family and that probably for the first time
in our marriage we've both felt that way. And yeah,
so I think that that was a very that was
(33:58):
a big point of contention our relationship that we just
kind of swept under the rug a little bit, but
it did when we had to confront it, I go, Okay,
I didn't know you were feeling that well way, so
let's do this to alleviate that, and me working and
busting to help her in that way, it was a
(34:21):
it makes me feel good, as you know, as a
partner that it's not all on.
Speaker 5 (34:26):
Her right, but it's always We've always been very clear
that this is the world that I created and I
live in, and I don't expect you to jump into
this financially because that's not you know, I wouldn't ask
anybody to jump into a situation that they are not
familiar with. So I think that we've navigated it pretty well.
(34:46):
And I will say too, like you know, I used to.
I've said before in certain relationships, like when the woman
is the you know, breadwinner or makes more money than
the man that I heard Sally Field say this once.
It's like a cancer eats away the relationship, which is
a pretty dramatic visual, but it's honestly like there's a
(35:08):
seed planted, and if that seed of resentment or contempt
or any bitterness about that, if that seed is watered,
it really can grow and just some a big fat
weed in your relationship. So I think that really being
honest and upfront about each of our independent finances and
(35:31):
how we see ourselves and then how we see us
as a couple has really benefited us.
Speaker 6 (35:36):
Yeah. I mean when we first met, she didn't know.
When I first moved in with her at the other house,
I was like, well, so what's your what's the electrical bill?
Let me see what that looks like. She didn't know,
So that's where we started. So I had to like
delve in, do you know that this is much money?
(35:59):
We shouldn't keep that full heater on because that's a
lot of money.
Speaker 5 (36:04):
Like the water warm, what's.
Speaker 6 (36:06):
The So things like that. That's gotten a lot better
where she over our tenure relationship, has learned so much
more about finances and has gotten her own finances under control.
And and and it's so wonderful to see her bloom
in that regard and for me just to say, well,
(36:28):
I you know, I helped her with that as well
as she supported me with other things, you know, I
mean COVID was tough. I mean I opened a new
spot and I was working five nights a week just
going in there, and you know, she supported me through that,
and then now we're at this point. It's great.
Speaker 3 (36:48):
Yeah, that's so cool.
Speaker 4 (36:49):
I mean because finances, I mean, it is a topic
that people don't want to discuss. And I think didn't
they say people would prefer to talk about sex, even
uncomfortable conversations about sex, versus uncomfortable conversations about money, Like
money is just this taboo topic that can eat away you.
So that's a really thank you for sharing that because
I think that's very relatable to a lot of people.
Speaker 2 (37:10):
Guys.
Speaker 1 (37:10):
While you were giving your answer, I kept nudging her
and whispering they're adults. Yeah, Like that was just a
grown up answer. I know, you know what I'm saying.
You hear all kinds of answers, but you.
Speaker 2 (37:19):
All, that's real life and adulthood right there. And that's
what I kept nudging her.
Speaker 6 (37:25):
Thanks. I told her that if we're buried together one day,
someone's going to put mister Garth by accident. And I'm told.
Speaker 5 (37:36):
He doesn't give a ship. He's like that when you
check into a hotel, if he calls them.
Speaker 6 (37:40):
By, they go, they go, mister, mister Garth, Hey, what's up?
Speaker 5 (37:45):
Man?
Speaker 2 (37:47):
I've been called mister before. I love it when they
call the room, would you like?
Speaker 4 (37:52):
Uh?
Speaker 2 (37:53):
Sent up?
Speaker 3 (37:54):
He never corrects them either. He thinks it's hilarious.
Speaker 5 (37:59):
A guy that doesn't that's not an issue for them, Like,
who cares?
Speaker 4 (38:03):
It's so nice. It is so nice. Yes, that is
not lost on me. By the way, thank you for
being always like never getting offended by that or having
your manhood, you know. But let's take it some way somehow,
So I appreciate that. How do you guys handle household
chores like cooking, cleaning, laundry, try.
Speaker 3 (38:24):
All that stuff that people fight about?
Speaker 6 (38:27):
I love? Can we do this once a week? This
is this is great. I'll start first. I do the poop.
I do a lot of poop, dog poop, peep. I
feed the dogs. I do the dishes. I load the
dishes in the morning because I'm the morning person. They
(38:49):
get a lot of dishes at night. I unload it
in the morning. I take out the trash.
Speaker 5 (38:57):
You're in charge of turning off the lights and are
huge doors because every no one turns off lights.
Speaker 6 (39:04):
I'm like that guy, like it's sign. I put a
big sign in the eighteen year old room before she
walks out. Lights.
Speaker 3 (39:12):
Lights, lights, that's funny.
Speaker 6 (39:17):
Yeah, she's constantly. Yeah, she's constantly.
Speaker 5 (39:21):
I'm a homemaker, so I'll do anything. I love it.
I love I would rather be doing like household chores
than most things.
Speaker 6 (39:30):
So it's wild.
Speaker 1 (39:32):
You've got a full house there. So, but the cooking
in the laundry has to be a big deal. How
how are those two things handled?
Speaker 5 (39:38):
Well, we let the girls do their own laundry, thank god,
and we alternate the lawn well, usually Tuesday night.
Speaker 6 (39:44):
Tuesday night's the laundry night, and she'll do it and
then I'll put it away.
Speaker 4 (39:49):
That's kind of how I us have like such an
awesome system, Like you even knew what night you do
laundry and you tag team everything.
Speaker 3 (39:57):
That's remarkable.
Speaker 1 (39:58):
Yeah, we have to admit a eighty percent of our
couples that were they were doing great now all the questions.
We got the laundry, and there are cracks and the relationship,
so it's very impressive to hear you will handle it
the way you do it.
Speaker 6 (40:12):
Don't get don't get me wrong. I hate laundry's that's
probably that's the thing. I hate them.
Speaker 5 (40:19):
I don't mind it, so it works out.
Speaker 1 (40:23):
Next question here, tell us how much time do you
find that you need, not just a loan, but away
from each other. It sounds like you get enough of
it just naturally, but do you find that you need
some time apart?
Speaker 5 (40:37):
I feel like we during our therapy work, we both
learned the concept of circle, square circle from our therapist
or my therapist who was also seeing you. But Wade
wait Davis, he taught us this that we're each our
own individual circles and then in the middle is the square,
(40:57):
and that square represents our our relationship together. So we
both have these circles that we on a daily basis
are filling with you know, work and doing things that
make us happy and you know, clipping off all those
pieces of the pie that make somebody whole. Right, So
those circles are whole and independent of one another. And
(41:19):
then that square in the middle is empty, and we
put into it whatever we want, like if well, however,
we want to nurture the relationship. So we try to
keep that square in the middle in our in our
sights and you know, in our goals, and we try
to put into that square. But I think that that
(41:40):
awareness for me was really essential because I am kind
of a co dependent person on only my family, like
certain like my kids and my husband. So I but
i'ms also okay with being codependent a little bit. I
I you know the word interdependent. Yes, yes, that's my
new that one, because I don't think codependency is like
(42:02):
a terrible thing. I love people and I want to
be around them.
Speaker 3 (42:06):
I'm the same way, Jenny, I'm the same way for me.
Speaker 6 (42:08):
I was I was. I needed that kind of independence
I needed in my time. I needed to go, you know,
be away and then so I can fill that bucket
and so that I could come back and and golf
for me kind of checks all those boxes. It checks
the social box, it checks the activity box, it checks
(42:29):
the mental health box, because you're so into that. So
we have worked that's a that's been a big part
of how we worked. Like when we first got together.
I used to go on these football trips with my
Oklahoma friends to go see ou football and we would
do that, and that was tough for her. She didn't
(42:50):
understand that. She couldn't understand that.
Speaker 5 (42:53):
I think that I was just in a different place
at that point, Like I wasn't interested in my husband
going off and getting drunk, and you know, he was
at a different place. And I think as we've matured,
those things have settled in and like eased up, so
they they aren't in, they aren't thorns.
Speaker 6 (43:12):
Correct, Yeah, it's not as it's no big deal now
like it it was so much of a big deal.
Speaker 5 (43:18):
But he's a Gemini and I'm an Aries. I don't
know if you I don't know that much about astrology,
but I know that Geminis are the people that have
two sides, right, which I didn't really know until like
three years in. I never I never was like, oh
my gosh, I'm seeing the other side of the Gemini
and I'm an Aries, which is very strong willed and
determined and you know, so it's an interesting combination.
Speaker 4 (43:43):
Super super independent le Leo and Aquarius is what we are. Gemini,
I'm not that good and that I only know about
it better.
Speaker 5 (43:57):
I wish I knew more about astrology because I think
it's super I just know geminis.
Speaker 6 (44:02):
Get a bad rap.
Speaker 4 (44:14):
The funny thing is the next couple of questions you
all have absolutely already answered, like have you ever broken up? Yes?
Speaker 3 (44:22):
Have you ever been a couple of therapy? Yes, But
we have this question.
Speaker 4 (44:26):
Have you ever in the middle of an argument threatened
to get divorced, threatened to leave the relationship outside of
when you.
Speaker 3 (44:34):
Guys actually did do that?
Speaker 4 (44:36):
Have you ever used or reached that point where you
threw that bomb at the in an argument?
Speaker 5 (44:43):
Oh? Yeah, in the earlier days, we really did. And
that was super hard for me because the stabilizing, like
to be told I'm out of here, this is even
doing this, or you know, it's the worst each other.
It's the worst feeling.
Speaker 6 (45:01):
Yeah, And I'm my biggest thing I have to work
on in my whole entire life is fight or flight.
It's just such a for me. When I leave a situation,
it's this like almost rebirth. It feels so good to me.
It's like it's crazy, but it's not healthy, you know
what I'm saying, Like, Yeah, so I would like in
(45:23):
those fights that where normally I would just leave and
go in the other room or just leave, I just
have chosen to just stay. And so for me just
to even stay even when nothing's getting solved and still
the shit dad has meant so much more to her
and stabilized her even though in my whole being it's
(45:44):
killing me.
Speaker 5 (45:44):
It's so interesting that we met, like we paired up
because I have abandonment issues from my father, initially getting
really sick and like kind of losing that father figure
even though he's stayed alive for a long time. I felt,
I think, abandoned as a young girl. And then relationships
happen and marriages and those kinds of things happened, so
(46:07):
it kind of embedded that further in me. But and
then I met somebody who likes to leave, Like who
doesn't who I'm I was in the beginning always like
well I think he might leave again, Like he's gonna leave,
so how can you you know?
Speaker 6 (46:22):
I mean, yeah, it's that's why I said at the
at the beginning of this content for the like the
first point part, I mean, in my life I have
felt complete content. There is no like I got it.
How am I getting out of this situation. Okay, what
good do I have one hundred thousand dollars where I
(46:44):
could just go make a new life somewhere.
Speaker 3 (46:48):
Every everybody has had that.
Speaker 6 (46:52):
These are the thoughts, right, but you've got to block those.
I mean, just this is this is the this is
these are the crazy wirings that I have that I
have to like work on.
Speaker 5 (47:02):
It's just me who's like, leaving isn't an option.
Speaker 6 (47:07):
You're either in or you're out, like, and it feels
so much better to have made that commitment and being like, man,
this is this is what I am in. I've made
these choices, and I am so better off.
Speaker 4 (47:18):
I totally get that. Like, I absolutely have that same
instinct like I have to get out of here. I
have to, like, I have to leave.
Speaker 3 (47:24):
And he's like, if you leave, you will not be
coming back.
Speaker 1 (47:28):
That's no, no, no wait wait, that's only if you
make the threat.
Speaker 7 (47:32):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (47:32):
I never put you out.
Speaker 4 (47:34):
Oh no no no, you're just saying if you walk
out that door, no, that it will be locked.
Speaker 5 (47:40):
The way.
Speaker 2 (47:40):
So today's point to hear.
Speaker 1 (47:42):
I was really interested Dave and hearing what you were
saying there about you know, the fight or flight thing
to where I'm never the one that's usually trying to fly.
But if you tell me you mentioned something about just
how you're able to move on, it's the next thing.
When someone tells me this relationship is over or I'm
done or I'm leaving, I'm already in my mind.
Speaker 2 (48:01):
How am I going to get her things back over
to her? Wow?
Speaker 1 (48:04):
If FedEx is open at a thirty tomorrow, like I'm done? Yeah, yeah,
not because I choose to, but I listen to someone.
I don't play that game, so we it's been interesting
the bag of Force I really set up, Dave when
you were talking about that fight or flight and how
your mind kind of works.
Speaker 3 (48:22):
Yeah, and it's not it. I don't even think it's
a game.
Speaker 4 (48:24):
I think you're it's your it's your ego protecting you,
it's my ego protecting me. It's your ego protect You
have to have your backup plan, you have to have
what am I doing now to protect myself? Because I'm
feeling really hurt and really scared? So what do I
do to protect myself? And everybody has different responses to that,
But thank you for like articulating that, because I think
a lot of people would relate to that, and I
(48:45):
think it's really cool that even though you have that
tendency as so many people do, as I do too,
that you say, I'm going to make a choice. I'm
in this relationship and I'm going to I am not
going to do this thing. It will make me feel
good right now because the harm it will do later
is not worth it.
Speaker 6 (49:04):
Yeah, that's that's such a good point that you mentioned ego,
because that's one hundred percent what it is. That's one
hundred percent what like it hits to your core and
that's just false evidence appearing real, you know what I mean.
Speaker 5 (49:17):
Oh, this is so good. He taught me that fear
that's the fault. Evidence is false evidence appearing real.
Speaker 3 (49:27):
Wow, that's so cool. I love that and it's so true.
Speaker 5 (49:34):
Yeah, you said a lot like when I'm when I'm
feeling fearful of anything, Like I'll just come back to
that and think, oh, okay.
Speaker 4 (49:43):
That's a good thing to say to yourself when you're
feeling that, especially if you Yeah, that's oh my gosh,
I'm using that.
Speaker 3 (49:49):
Thank you.
Speaker 2 (49:50):
We'll use it tomorrow.
Speaker 3 (49:51):
Yeah, morning tomorrow.
Speaker 1 (49:52):
All right, next last few things there, we'll get to
these last few here for you.
Speaker 2 (49:56):
What is it? And I want to use the word warn,
but what is it? If you saw a whole.
Speaker 1 (50:01):
Line of couples lined up at city Hall going into
get married at the justice of the piece, what is it?
You would want to go down that line and make
sure you tell every couple make sure you consider this,
think about this, or even warn them about don't do
it before they say I do.
Speaker 5 (50:19):
I see somebody getting married, I'm like, oh, don't do it.
Speaker 3 (50:23):
Oh, just wait a little while. Yeah, through some things first.
Speaker 5 (50:28):
But I think that's just like I don't think that's true.
I think that's the bitter miss in me. But I
feel like now with the relationship that we've developed into,
I could give them tips and pointers all day long about,
you know, just how to have a more harmonious life together.
Speaker 6 (50:49):
I would just I would say, are you ready to work?
Because it's like it's not for everyone. I mean, I
don't know. I mean somebody way back in the day
we don't even know, said you guys get married and
then you do this, and then this is how it's
supposed to be the social whatever. I don't know if
(51:11):
it's for everyone. I would just say, if you're willing
to commit and make and that will fulfill you and
the work will fulfill you. Then go, yeah, do it.
But it's yeah, that's.
Speaker 4 (51:23):
So good, Dave, because we watch all these relationship shows
are one of our favorites is Married at First Sight,
and we keep hearing all the couples say, it's okay,
you guys love it too, But it's just like.
Speaker 3 (51:36):
Dumbist line, I'm somebody's wife.
Speaker 2 (51:39):
The dumb one is we go crazy. I didn't think
marriage would be this hard.
Speaker 4 (51:43):
Yeah, everyone says, I didn't think it was going to
be hard, and they they love the idea and the
concept of being someone's wife or having a husband, but
it's almost like anybody could fill the spot.
Speaker 3 (51:53):
They just want to be married.
Speaker 4 (51:55):
But what people think is just going to be this
immediate union where you just have a partner who's all
always on your side, and that is just so not true.
Speaker 6 (52:04):
We probably we could have been on that show. That's
how we were, and then that's probably the feelings that
we had the same things like well, we're married, we're
husband wife and then.
Speaker 3 (52:19):
Oh crap, now this is actually hard. What am I
supposed to do?
Speaker 4 (52:22):
Now? This isn't what I signed up for I think
is something that other people say too on the show
that actually is exactly what you signed up for. You
just didn't know what you were signing up for.
Speaker 5 (52:31):
No, it's hard, it's hard work, and it's like you're
spending twenty for seven with someone that is a completely
different individual. Like and when you get married, people like
expect us, people to be like, oh, we're married, so
we think the same, we have all the same goals.
We are one. No, we're not one. We are two
(52:54):
people that are choosing to live our lives together every day.
And that's a lot. That's a lot to be with
somebody that much.
Speaker 4 (53:03):
Oh, and it's it's all about expectations, isn't it. And
people we just when you're young, or when you when
you're you got your your honeymoon phase in full swing,
you just aren't thinking about what's going to happen in
the years to come.
Speaker 3 (53:17):
So that's cool, all right, She's not going to.
Speaker 5 (53:18):
Be rainbows and unicorns all the time.
Speaker 4 (53:21):
I know.
Speaker 6 (53:21):
But it's such a good feeling.
Speaker 4 (53:23):
Isn't it.
Speaker 3 (53:23):
Though I know it's addictive.
Speaker 4 (53:25):
Okay, final question, and this is a cheesy question, but
we've loved the answers.
Speaker 3 (53:32):
What would you each say.
Speaker 4 (53:35):
Is the secret or the thing your thing? Why your
relationship has lasted through the ups and downs, and that
you two are a successful, happy couple.
Speaker 3 (53:48):
What is the secret to your success.
Speaker 6 (53:50):
Day by day by day by day. I think the
I I hate to keep saying commitment, but I think
we're we're staying committed to each other, and we're staying
committed to the goals that we have set. We've set
like a tenure plan right now and we're kind of
(54:12):
moving down there. So I'm helping her, she's supporting me.
We're just the support is kind of and we're very
excited about just the future the girls, her business, my business.
It's just that's why I said content because like I'm
(54:33):
we're good right now and we're very excited about the future.
Like I don't know, is something like gonna happen? If
am I waiting for something to happen?
Speaker 5 (54:40):
Like free will? It's human beings. We have free will.
So I think I had to learn that the hard way,
like when he left and realizing, oh, you can leave
any time you want, Like it's a choice. It's a
choice to stay together every day. And I think that
that is one of the things, and also treat your
(55:01):
spouse like they're your best friend because they are. Like
at the end of the day, that's the person that
gets you. I feel so confident that he understands me
like nobody else does. And I turned to him for
advice on how to just like think like a normal person,
because sometimes I can, you know, go.
Speaker 6 (55:24):
And like, no, that's not what we do here.
Speaker 5 (55:31):
Really keep me grounded, so I.
Speaker 6 (55:35):
Forget that that's not normal.
Speaker 4 (55:40):
Well, I love the day by day like you just
take it one day at a time, and you choose
each other and you love each other.
Speaker 6 (55:47):
You know what.
Speaker 4 (55:47):
We learned so much about the two of you, Jenny
and Dave, and so has everyone else listening.
Speaker 3 (55:53):
So thank you for being open and being real. It's
not easy.
Speaker 4 (55:58):
It's not easy at all to talk about these things,
but everybody goes through it, and so I just I
love how relatable and down to earth and real both
of you were.
Speaker 3 (56:07):
So thank you well you too as well.
Speaker 6 (56:09):
We always we had a blast when we were in
San Francisco. You guys are great.
Speaker 5 (56:15):
It was fun.
Speaker 6 (56:15):
It was too short. I know you guys were tired,
but we need to make another run run one day.
Speaker 1 (56:21):
See now, We're going to be annoying next time we
see you because now we have all these relationship questions.
Speaker 2 (56:26):
Ask you guys.
Speaker 3 (56:28):
Remember that time.
Speaker 4 (56:29):
It's like we've just been along this ride with you
for all these years, and so now we know all
your history, we can have really fun, in depth conversation
next time we see you too, which hopefully will be soon.
Speaker 2 (56:39):
Yes, guys, thank you all so much.
Speaker 1 (56:40):
We will see y'all soon, having us City appreciate it.
Speaker 5 (56:44):
Bye,
Hosts And Creators
Amy Robach
T.J. Holmes
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