Amanda Seales Part 2

Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Thank you for coming back. Part two is underway because
I want to talk about the radio. I want to
talk about you because you as the intro, You've done
a lot of things. Yes, your your resume is extensive.
Oh seriously, no no, no, no bull jive, no real talk.
And I don't know if you really know or maybe

(00:25):
people haven't told you.

Speaker 2 (00:26):
Maybe you just and we're all wired like this.

Speaker 1 (00:29):
We kind of hear more here of the negativity than
the positive because being in the next professional athlete, the
losses haunt me more than the wins. I remember I
lost way more than I didn't.

Speaker 3 (00:40):
That suck.

Speaker 4 (00:41):
It's like so irritating that our brains are wired that way.
It's like, this is not helpful.

Speaker 1 (00:45):
Yeah, the parades don't bring me the joy that the
hurt and the losses I feel.

Speaker 5 (00:53):
You.

Speaker 2 (00:55):
So your first job, in one of the first jobs
you had, were you a radio host? Did you? How
did you get to radio?

Speaker 4 (01:02):
I was a spoken word poet, so I did like
deaf poetry jam when I was in college, and I
would do slams and you know all of that, And
I ended up performing at a Jesse Jackson Rainbow Push
benefit and I just remember it being like pouring rain

(01:23):
and I still was like no, I'm gonna rainbow push
to get there. And there was a brother there, Ken Spelman,
who gave me his card and was like, you know,
we should talk about you doing radio, but like listen, brothers,
give you a card, give you.

Speaker 2 (01:37):
The card you.

Speaker 3 (01:40):
You'd be like I Hi.

Speaker 4 (01:43):
So I went back to purchase and the car was
sitting on my desk and I hadn't called him. It
was like a week and my homegirl was sitting at
my desk because she was like using my computer and
she was looking at the car. She was like, oh wow,
this office is at Rockefeller Center and I was like
offices at Rockebell Center.

Speaker 3 (02:01):
She was like the car that you have in your
desk from. Who's this car from?

Speaker 4 (02:05):
And I was like, oh, that's that's the guy I
met at the at the benefit.

Speaker 3 (02:10):
She was like, I think this is legit. I was
like huh. And I looked at it.

Speaker 4 (02:15):
I was like, oh shit, I didn't even realize this.
I thought it was like homeboy LLC. So I called
him and he was like, I'd love for you to
come to the radio, and like, you know, I want
to interview you as a poet.

Speaker 3 (02:24):
Et cetera.

Speaker 4 (02:24):
I didn't realize that when I went to the radio
and he was interviewing me about poetry, he was actually
interviewing me for the job. So I ended up getting
a job as a radio host at Sirius, and I
was hosting like these two stations that were kind of
like just esoteric and all over the place and eclectic.
And then I graduated. So that was in March of

(02:45):
twenty twenty. Ooh, no, baby, that was in March of
two thousand and three.

Speaker 2 (02:51):
Three, because I started it serious at two thousand and four.

Speaker 4 (02:54):
I did radio for Serious, Okay, So I started there
in two thousand and three and then nine months late.

Speaker 3 (03:00):
So I've graduated.

Speaker 4 (03:01):
Now I'm sitting in actually no, These two guys that
were on the hip hop station, they were standing in
their boss's office, but the office had two sections, and
they were in the front section. I had just peeked
my head in to say hi, and they're like, oh,
what's up? And they had like the Outcast album in
front of them. Speaker box lub below was in front
of them, and I was like, oh, man.

Speaker 3 (03:20):
I love that album.

Speaker 4 (03:21):
They were like, yeah, we're supposed to interview them later today.
You know, we're really excited, but we really don't know
a lot about outcasts. So I start going in because
I'm an outcast fan. So I start going in and
while we're talking their boss who's on the other side
of the court, the cubicle gets a call that they
have to move the interview to the next day. So
he's like, hey, guys, they got to move the interview tomorrow.

(03:41):
And they're like, oh shit, we can't do it. We
won't even be in town. And he's like, well, and
he like knew of me because I was on this.
I was that serious.

Speaker 3 (03:48):
He was like, hey, you sound like you know a
lot about outcasts. Do you want to do the interview?

Speaker 4 (03:53):
But yeah, so that was my first interview, My very
first interview was with outcast.

Speaker 3 (04:00):
Wow, and.

Speaker 4 (04:04):
Yeah, like I love he's an And then and so
then I was at serious for a few years and uh, yeah,
I don't want to tell another negative story.

Speaker 3 (04:18):
So then I wasn't that serious.

Speaker 2 (04:23):
What happened?

Speaker 3 (04:25):
How you? How you?

Speaker 1 (04:27):
I mean you you a magician because you will magically
appear on the job and then you just disappear.

Speaker 3 (04:32):
What other version of that is there?

Speaker 2 (04:35):
I'm just.

Speaker 4 (04:37):
You said the only job I got fired from. This
is the only job of how you get how you
get fired.

Speaker 3 (04:41):
So my boss was.

Speaker 4 (04:42):
This brother who's who I will not even honor by
naming him. He had a little less chain and a
high booty okay, and he had a poster of Condoleeza
Rice and uh. He would send us memos with intros

(05:03):
from different generals, like there would be like a memo
with like a paragraph from General McCarthy and Norman schwartzkough
like this is hip hop, nigga? What why am I being?
Why am I having to deal with this? And he
came into my studio. Well, the first time we ever met.
I went to dap him and he said, keep it corporate.

Speaker 3 (05:24):
Whoo.

Speaker 4 (05:24):
So that was our very first interaction. I went to
and he said keep it corporate. I said, okay, remember
I'm twenty one.

Speaker 3 (05:32):
Okay.

Speaker 4 (05:34):
Then a week later he came into my studio and
he said, so, you know, I just wanted you to
know that.

Speaker 3 (05:41):
I know that you're spoiled and I'm going to expose you. Huh.
And I'm twenty one and I'm in New York right, So.

Speaker 4 (05:55):
My instinct, my instinctual response to that is I have
to prove him wrong. And my way to prove him
wrong is I have to pull him in, you know,
I have to show him no.

Speaker 3 (06:03):
Like I'm Amanda, Like I'm not spoiled. I've worked really
hard for all of this shit, Like get out of here.

Speaker 4 (06:10):
So I spent the next two years really doing my
best to to to make sure they swing my way,
so to speak, not in a romantic way, but in
a professional way. So I'm showing up early, I'm staying late.
You know, I'm doing all the interviews. Everybody knew me
as serious because I am a true, full fledged hip

(06:33):
hope you know what I'm saying. So they knew that
when they brought their artists there, like it's going to
be a real interview. It's not just gonna be some
can that they just get everywhere else. So I got
really cool with the radio exacts, et cetera.

Speaker 3 (06:42):
So you know. And then at one point.

Speaker 4 (06:45):
In time, so once I went on tour with Flow
a Tree, he flipped. He flipped because he wanted to
be a star. And I was like, in his mind,
I guess getting started him. So once I went to
Flow with Toro Flow a Tree, I was like, oh,
I could be I could recur on tour, and he
just was not let it happen. Once I came back
from the Flooridry tour, it was never cool again, never

(07:06):
cool again. And he started doing weird stuff like lying
about people coming to the show, you know, to the station.
And so I remember at the time I was seeing
Loope and Loupe hit me and was like, uh, why
am I coming to the radio station. I'm not going
to interview with you, and you know, he don't know that.

(07:28):
So now I'm like, why is Loupe Fiasco coming to
the radio station but he's not interviewing with me. He's like, well,
how did you even know he was coming? You don't
need to know how I know that. The question is
why are you keeping out?

Speaker 3 (07:40):
Yeah?

Speaker 4 (07:40):
Like why are you keeping me out? He said, you
needed to give other people a chance bind you. I'm
not stopping anybody else, right, but if they.

Speaker 2 (07:48):
Want to interview with you, they want to interview with you.

Speaker 4 (07:51):
But also the way serious is set up, as you know,
they're going to interview with a myriad of people, So
I am not in any way.

Speaker 2 (07:59):
You're not the only one here.

Speaker 3 (08:00):
Yeah, he's just trying to keep them from interviewing with me, right.

Speaker 4 (08:05):
I remember Hove came and he was just like sitting
in the lobby and I had come into work and
I was like, what are you doing?

Speaker 3 (08:11):
You just sit here? He was like yeah. I was like,
you want to do an interview real quick? I got
a studio. He's like, you have no problem, so we
go do the interview.

Speaker 4 (08:17):
They tried to fire me because they said I interviewed
jay Z without clearance.

Speaker 2 (08:25):
Now, you know, they should have been applauding you.

Speaker 4 (08:28):
And it was pre recorded, so like if you didn't
want to use the interview, you didn't have to use
the interview. But they tried to say that I was
like stepping outside of you know, the program.

Speaker 2 (08:39):
But it aired on their station.

Speaker 1 (08:41):
It wasn't like you aired it somewhere Like it was
like I got this interview, I will put it on
my IG page.

Speaker 2 (08:46):
I'll put it on my Facebook page. It aired on there.

Speaker 4 (08:52):
So there's a book called The Gifted Adult. Yeah, and
in this book, within the first two pages, they give
two examples of adults who are gifted and it shows
up in their overachievement, it shows up in their type
A you know, assessment of personality. Right, It shows up
in their ability to show up, and this becomes a

(09:13):
problem at their jobs because people start to feel like
they're outworking them. People start to feel like they're outdoing
them right, and then it becomes you think you're better
than me. Yes, So this is the dynamic I have
experienced in many places. So whereas you said, oh, they
should be applauding you, I texted Hove on my T

(09:36):
mobile sidekick because that was the time, and that.

Speaker 3 (09:40):
Just lets you know how old we are.

Speaker 4 (09:42):
And I was like, Hey, they're trying to fire me
for interviewing you. And he said, brebating on what you said.
He said, well, not verbadam, but he said they should
be promoting you. But notice who are the over achievers
in this conversation. See how all the overachievers had the
same response. Right, No, the way, I'm in a way,

(10:02):
I'm doing too much, and I'm a girl, I'm a
woman doing too much.

Speaker 3 (10:06):
Shut the fa.

Speaker 4 (10:08):
Okay, that's what that's what they think. That's what a
lot of that's what a lot of the energy is.
A lot of the energy is shut up. And even
if if you won't let me at least make me think,
let me just let me think. I remember Green Lantern
telling me, you know what your reputation is that you
are hard to over and even harder and I was like,

(10:29):
my mother, I'm sure he is very proud, but that
was so you know, as serious. I So what ended
up happening was I went to.

Speaker 3 (10:43):
HR and shared with that.

Speaker 4 (10:45):
This is before I knew that HR see the game
that you be telling them about that. I didn't know
that the HR ain't for you, it's for them. So
I went to HR like, oh, listen, I'm having trouble
with my sub period.

Speaker 3 (10:59):
You know, he's not very.

Speaker 4 (11:00):
Kind, and I'm thinking that they're gonna set me up
to like a solution.

Speaker 3 (11:04):
Baby.

Speaker 4 (11:04):
They said, from now on, you will not speak to him.
You will speak to this other person who will relate
to him.

Speaker 2 (11:11):
Wow.

Speaker 4 (11:12):
So I'm like, I mean, I that's not like a solution,
but I guess you know, so now I do this
for a year.

Speaker 3 (11:21):
I do this for a year.

Speaker 4 (11:24):
Now I'm dating Pusher t As you can see that
rappers I have dated are very great MC's because I
have high quality, high quality.

Speaker 3 (11:33):
That was two.

Speaker 2 (11:34):
Let me say, I mean, you know, I mean, I'm
glad you shared that information.

Speaker 4 (11:38):
But well, I think it's I think it's valid in Shouteau, Virginia,
his beautiful wife and their beautiful son, because we grow up,
you know, we grow up, and I think it's important
that we acknowledge that people have like full lifespans.

Speaker 2 (11:51):
People that people might know.

Speaker 5 (11:55):
You know.

Speaker 4 (11:56):
And I just feel like, if I'm who came before you,
you know, I'm a good I'm a good I'm a
good record.

Speaker 3 (12:01):
So I remember I got invited to the.

Speaker 4 (12:09):
Uh MTV Music Awards right.

Speaker 3 (12:15):
By PUSH's manager. They were like, we're gonna be out here.
Let us know if you want to come. Now.

Speaker 4 (12:21):
You if you have someone who's on radio and they
have a hip hop show and they can go to
the MTV Music Awards, wouldn't you say, head on out there,
bring a dat machine and a mic.

Speaker 3 (12:32):
See how many interviews you can get.

Speaker 2 (12:34):
Right?

Speaker 3 (12:35):
So I tell the person that I have to talk
to to talk to the boss.

Speaker 4 (12:39):
I'm gonna I want to go. Can we find someone
to cover my shift? He says yes, he finds someone
to cover my shift. He says, your shift is covered,
you can go. I head out there. While I'm out there,
I get a call. I get a call from my
boss saying you going to the MTV Music Awards is
an example of severe and subordination, and so we will

(13:00):
be terminating your contract, I said, but I followed the.

Speaker 2 (13:05):
Protocol, got someone to cover my shield.

Speaker 3 (13:08):
I spoke to this other person.

Speaker 4 (13:09):
He said, well, you were supposed to speak to me, Well,
not according to human resource lol. The person in the
back who said yeah, So I said, well, not according
to human resources. He said, well according to me. So
I then went back to you.

Speaker 2 (13:26):
Didn't get no interviews. At least getting the interviews and
keep them for yourself.

Speaker 3 (13:30):
I didn't even have I didn't get didn't even have
adapt machine.

Speaker 2 (13:32):
Oh okay, okay.

Speaker 3 (13:33):
But I went back to New York and they fired me.

Speaker 4 (13:37):
And then I went on my Space and I said,
you know, I did like an announcement, like, you know,
you won't be able to hear my show anymore. I'm
really it's really unfortunate that my boss, you know, who
is a black man, just didn't feel like it was necessary,
like it wasn't necessary for him to protect me in
this situation. But nonetheless, it is what it is. And
I hope that I can create other ways, you know,
to reach y'all. He saw that post used it and

(13:59):
have me from serious for seven years. He said that
that post was an indication of my like wanting to
come back and like harm him.

Speaker 3 (14:13):
That little chain. How booty get you every time? Get
you every time.

Speaker 4 (14:19):
But you know what that that situation speaks to a
number of situations where people hold them, people holding me
to a standard they don't hold them. So it was like,
I'm gonna treat you any old way and you just
gonna take You just need to take it.

Speaker 3 (14:36):
You just need to accept it.

Speaker 4 (14:37):
And I don't know when this happens, Shannon, but even
within the zeitgeist now, it's like I am expected to
just take whatever is given to me and shut the
fuck up, and I will not. I don't understand that
no matter what jobs I've had, if I speak on it,
it becomes she's complaining. It's like, well, I'm I'm expressing
my experience.

Speaker 3 (14:56):
And if you.

Speaker 4 (14:56):
Haven't noticed, remember I told you, I'm just giving you this.
This happened, and this happened, and this happened. I'm not
speaking to what they thought. I'm not speaking to how
they made me feel. I'm just telling you these are
the series of events, and you can judge for yourself.
But ultimately this idea that like I am somehow not
allowed to have struggle, like I'm not allowed to have

(15:17):
a bad experience without there being this doubt painted on me.

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Speaker 4 (16:22):
I remember my really good friend, my really like my
age boncoon. She she used to hear me tell stories
and she would be like, and she revealed this later.
She was like, you know, I would say to myself,
she must be leaving something out. There's no way this
could have happened this way. She must be leaving something out.

(16:43):
Until I got kicked out that Emmy's party.

Speaker 1 (16:46):
What'd you do to get kicked out to Hemmy's party? Damn,
we can't take you nowhere?

Speaker 2 (16:52):
What you do?

Speaker 4 (16:52):
I go to a lot of places because I'm lovable
and people like me and I'm delightful.

Speaker 3 (16:57):
I am delightful.

Speaker 2 (16:58):
What did you do?

Speaker 3 (17:00):
I arrived?

Speaker 2 (17:02):
Okay, you arrived, Okay, you're inside.

Speaker 3 (17:04):
No. So here's how it went.

Speaker 4 (17:07):
So, because Hollywood is just so inundated with whiteness, there
was this conglomeration folks that came together to say, you
know what, We're gonna have a black Ammy's party because
you know, have you.

Speaker 3 (17:17):
Been to the Amb's parties.

Speaker 2 (17:18):
I've never been to am.

Speaker 4 (17:19):
So like they're just you know, they're just very blah like.
It's just a bunch of people sitting around like.

Speaker 3 (17:24):
Am I right? Am I right? Oh my god? K'res
stink'restin you're sin Like that's the vibe ya. But you
know when we party, we want to have a little
bit more fun too. It you know, called the nice
but up Derek. So the in twenty.

Speaker 4 (17:43):
Eighteen was the first one where they had a black
a mes party. So basically it's like everybody who'dne been
to all the mother parties come in this one. Yes,
And I went to that party with Jill Scott. And
one of the people that planned that party was Isa
Ray's publicist, Vanessa Anderson, So she was one of the
planners of the party. But there's a bunch of people
involved in planning this party, correct. So I show up

(18:05):
with Jill, and Jill's manager was like, hey, you know,
can we And I remember hearing Vanessa go like, oh
come han, Amanda, mind you. I'm like, I don't know
what I'm doing wrong right here, Like I'm just standing
with Jill Scott.

Speaker 3 (18:18):
But nonetheless we came in the party, we had a
great time.

Speaker 4 (18:21):
So but and I said to Issa, like, I don't
know what's going on with your publicist, but like she
she got something wrong.

Speaker 3 (18:26):
She got a problem with me, and she was like,
that's between y'all.

Speaker 2 (18:29):
Okay.

Speaker 4 (18:30):
I said, well, it's not really between y'all because I
don't have a problem with her, but she seems to
have a problem with me, and she was like, that's
none of my business.

Speaker 2 (18:37):
Okay, Okay.

Speaker 4 (18:39):
So now next year it's twenty nineteen, and it was
interesting because in twenty eighteen, it was packed like a
big in front of that place.

Speaker 3 (18:46):
In twenty nineteen, there was like nobody there.

Speaker 4 (18:48):
But I was at the HBO party, and every black
person I saw, I would tell them, make sure you
go to the Black and The's party because I am
about creating community and I want us to be together, right.
So I pull up with my homegirl, Kathia and Kendrick
Sampson who's on Insecure, you know the show where I
don't have any friends. So I pull up with Kendrick Sampson.

(19:10):
So we get to the door and I learned later
that she just is white passing. But this is a
Mexican girl, but like she looked like a white girl.

Speaker 3 (19:17):
Okay. So she at the door for the for the
Emys for what kind of party?

Speaker 2 (19:24):
Black party?

Speaker 3 (19:24):
There you go? So she tells us you can go in,
you can go and you can't go in.

Speaker 2 (19:30):
Now.

Speaker 4 (19:30):
I think she's talking to my friend because my friend
is a realtor. And she says, no, you can't go in.
And I said, well, why can't I go in? She says,
you're just on the list to not be able to
go in.

Speaker 3 (19:44):
Now.

Speaker 4 (19:45):
I had also been invited to this party directly by
Jesse Williams. So Jesse Williams said, texted me and said,
please come to the Black Emmy's party.

Speaker 3 (19:54):
Okay.

Speaker 4 (19:55):
So I'm like, all right, I'm gonna come. I'm gonna
come to the Black Amy's party. Yeah, of course that's
what I am about. So I come to the party
and I'm like, okay, uh, why am I not being
let in?

Speaker 3 (20:10):
Hm?

Speaker 4 (20:12):
Kendrick says, I'm gonna go. Look, I'm gonna go look
around and see why you're not being let in. Well, baby,
I'm not stand it outside no party, right, So I
head out, but then I'm stopped by just by this brother,
Joey Harris, who works with Jana Jackson. Joey's like and
Joey's like one of these people who's just always he's
his disposition is just always like glowing. It's kind of
like Jordan, right. So he's like, where are you going.

(20:36):
I'm like, oh, they said that they won't let me.

Speaker 3 (20:37):
In the party. He's like, absolutely not. Come on, Bat,
We're gonna get at you in this party, Loia. So
we come back and so this is an example of
someone trying to protect and look out right.

Speaker 4 (20:48):
So he brings me back and he's like, why are
you not letting her in the party? By the way,
at this time, I'm hosting Bring the Funny on MBC.
There is a billboard the size of a hotel two
blocks away with me and my co stars on the show,
Chrisy Tagan, Jeff Foxworthy and.

Speaker 3 (21:06):
Keenan Thompson and can I just put it a pin
in this really quick to get them their props.

Speaker 4 (21:13):
I had a real hard time on Insecure, and I'll
get to that, but being on this show was so
affirming because everyone there was so just happy to be happy,
and I hadn't experienced that on that set, like from
the showrunner to the writers, to my stage manager Roger,

(21:35):
to my co stars, Like I just got to be
myself and it really let me know it's not you,
it's the environment and I don't get to talk enough
about like the positive shit because people are always so attracted.

Speaker 3 (21:49):
To the negative.

Speaker 4 (21:50):
But I remember day one, Christy Tagan, we had to
do rehearsals for the first day and they had me.

Speaker 3 (21:55):
In the stilettos.

Speaker 4 (21:56):
Shannon, oh my god, like I would have had you
on the work for Yes, feet were crying and it
was I had an injury from these fucking stilettos. And
the next day Chrissy Teagan brought a foot massage from
sharper Image and left it in my dressing room for
the duration of the shoot. Like that's the kind of people,
you know, just generous for no reason, right, And we

(22:17):
just had a blast. We had such a good time.
And I remember Jeff fox Worthy one time they wanted
us to do this ad where we had to pass
around to drink, and I don't drink, so it's like,
I don't mind drinks being around, but like me pretending
like I drink ate my jib So I was like,
I just don't feel comfortable doing this.

Speaker 3 (22:33):
Now it becomes a thing. This is how I get
label difficult because I didn't get we didn't get any
prep for this.

Speaker 4 (22:39):
But you need to go along with whatever they give you.
Didn't you know that whatever they give you you were
supposed to do well. When you're a woman, it's even
more sh quick stirring up trouble. So Jeff Foxworthy saw
shit going left and he stepped in and he said, yeah,
I don't feel comfortable with it either.

Speaker 5 (23:01):
Wow.

Speaker 4 (23:02):
He used his fame, his white manness, you know, he
used his disposition to just take the heat off of me.

Speaker 3 (23:10):
He said, I got you to this day. I really
want to do a show with Jet fox Worth.

Speaker 4 (23:15):
We would just like fish and talk ship like that's
a goal I want to do if you want to produce.
I've been present while someone is fishing, but I have
not been given the marble.

Speaker 2 (23:25):
So you hadn't had a rod or a pole in
your hand. So I have.

Speaker 3 (23:28):
I have dated men from the South. I have been
present and had crappy cooked for me.

Speaker 1 (23:32):
Yes, oh okay, so yes, So I think you'd be
more of a shore fisherman, you know, on the land,
can't be in the boat.

Speaker 2 (23:42):
Yeah yeah, but I'm saying, we go, we.

Speaker 4 (23:43):
Go, yeah, baby step Yeah it's harder in the boat
than on the land.

Speaker 2 (23:48):
Yeah. Probably, So really, now.

Speaker 3 (23:52):
I thought there were more fish in the center.

Speaker 1 (23:54):
They're more fish, yeah, but when they go way out there,
they're they're normally fishing for a particular type of fish.
Like when you're on when you're on the shore, you
fish with anything to buy, catfish, crabby, you know, perch, bass,
But normally when you go out you fish for you know,
maybe you're trying to catch tuna, your branzino, something.

Speaker 3 (24:14):
Like that, snapper. Yes, okay, I'm into that.

Speaker 2 (24:21):
You know about fish, you just never actually had a
rod in your hand and like brought it off.

Speaker 4 (24:26):
So I am I hyper fixate. So I know a
lot about a lot of things because I become immersed. Yes,
So like I'm a scuba diver, so I know a
lot about fish. And then at one point it was
like I'm gonna learn everything I know about dogs, and
now I'm gonna learn everything I need to know about
Game of Thronts.

Speaker 3 (24:41):
I'm gonna learn everything I need to know about you know,
n C Dole football, Like I mean, like, but I
do know a lot about fish.

Speaker 2 (24:48):
Yeah, So you say you.

Speaker 4 (24:51):
Because I'm I'm I'm in the middle of a story
and sometimes I veer off, but I always come back because.

Speaker 2 (24:55):
I want to make sure we get to your insecure role.

Speaker 4 (24:58):
So I just wanted to shout that out because Bring
the Funny was a beautiful experience and it was super
super dup, super duper super duper dope. So when we're
here and Joey Harris is trying to get me in
this party, the white girl says again, Well, the white
passing girl says again, yeah, no, she can't come to party.

Speaker 3 (25:19):
So Joey's like, make a one side and figure out
what's going on. Again, I'm not about to stand out here,
so I started to walk away again, and now Elijah
Kelly comes out. He's like, hey, hey, Hey, where are
you going.

Speaker 4 (25:32):
I said, they're not trying to let me in this
party that I was invited to by Jesse Williams.

Speaker 2 (25:39):
You attempt to call Jesse.

Speaker 3 (25:42):
I attempt to call Jesse. I texted him, but he's
in a party, you know, so I texted him.

Speaker 4 (25:49):
So then Elijah is like, well, I'm one of the
planners of the party, so they can't stop you. They
can't stop me from bringing you in. So he starts
to bring me in at homegirl grabs my arm. But
I remember when I told you I've been in New
Yorker since I was twelve.

Speaker 3 (26:05):
Shake that off.

Speaker 2 (26:06):
Yeah, lose me?

Speaker 3 (26:07):
Yeah. Crazy.

Speaker 4 (26:09):
So we go in the party and I go and
sit down. No sorry, I go in the party, I
go by the bar. My homegirl goes to the bathroom.
I'm standing by the bar and a security guard approaches me.
A security guard your size approaches me and says, hey,
I'm gonna have to ask you to leave. And I said, well,
why why do I need to leave? And he said,

(26:31):
because you're you're being asked to leave. I said, well,
who's asking me to leave? He said, well, let me
go find out?

Speaker 2 (26:39):
Why?

Speaker 1 (26:40):
Did he a Well, I mean you came and say
they're asking you to leave, and you don't know who's
asking me to leave.

Speaker 3 (26:44):
You got to go find out he was given an order. Yeah.

Speaker 4 (26:48):
So now he comes back and he says, Vanessa Anderson
is asking me to leave. I said, we need to
find Vanessa and have her come tell me herself.

Speaker 2 (26:57):
Puplis yes.

Speaker 3 (27:01):
I said, well you need to have Vanessa come and
find me and tell me herself.

Speaker 4 (27:05):
So he then leaves again and comes back with three
other men, and one of the men now is a brother,
and he's walking towards me cursing. So he's literally walking
towards me, saying you need to get the fuck out
of here, you need to leave, and I'm ly mind you.
I'm I'm dressing down, honey, okay, And he's like.

Speaker 3 (27:24):
You need to leave now. Cathia was in the bathroom.

Speaker 4 (27:27):
She's now just come up and I'm looking around and
I can see people seeing this, right, So I'm like,
why do I have to leave?

Speaker 3 (27:35):
Because we've said so. So there's like violent energy and
language coming towards you.

Speaker 2 (27:40):
Right.

Speaker 4 (27:43):
I ain't no sucker, okay, And but I'm also not stupid.
I can't fight for men, so, like I mean, so
I the first one who was kind, he had come
up right here, but then the other three were right here.

Speaker 3 (28:03):
So I have to realize I've lost this fight.

Speaker 4 (28:06):
So I pivot to leave, but I pivot really fast
because I'm gonna still say my mother's piece.

Speaker 3 (28:11):
So when I pivot and.

Speaker 4 (28:13):
I say I pivot to go for you, I guess
they thought I was about to do something. So the
white guy steps in between me and the two the
and the brother and chest bumps me and throws me
back right. So now this is an assault because I
hadn't raised my hand to do anything to anybody. So

(28:33):
luckily I'm nimbleing a heel so I but now it's like,
you know, now I've been assaulted, so your natural response.

Speaker 3 (28:42):
So I'm about to go super Saiyan.

Speaker 4 (28:44):
On these motherfuckers Goku over here, I'm like, ah, and
I hear in one ear, I hear the security guard saying, please, Amanda,
don't do it, and it feels like plead, miss Cili,
don't do it. Don't be like me, miss Cili, don't
be like Miss Sophia. And then in the other ear,
I have my homegirl who's from the like this is
something buoy and all I'm hearing is big. But I

(29:08):
look around and I see nobody come into my aid.
All these agents and people that I see around now.

Speaker 3 (29:14):
None of them are Insecure. None of them are the
actors from Insecure.

Speaker 4 (29:17):
But there's people whose faces I still remember, and they
will not get a hug in a party either.

Speaker 3 (29:22):
I just refuse somebody a hug the other day.

Speaker 1 (29:23):
For this, and.

Speaker 3 (29:29):
I realized, like, you you gotta go.

Speaker 4 (29:31):
So we walk outside and the security guard says to
me and I'm so sorry, like I'm just doing my job,
and I said I feel you, but you have to
ask yourself is it worth doing a job that makes
you go against your moral compass. He was liked you,
so I hope he left that job because he could
tell that he was he was mixed up in some boolly.

Speaker 3 (29:53):
So We're in a back alley.

Speaker 4 (29:56):
Like waiting for a car, and I'm crying because this
feels like, you know, I've been humiliated and I didn't
do nothing. And that was the night that me and
my homegirl became super like that became my sister because
she was like, when you would tell me that she
would happen to you, I would think she must be
keeping something out. But I literally just watched you do nothing.

(30:17):
You literally just came somewhere. You were invited, and even
though you tried to leave, multiple people said no, you
belong here. Multiple people. Another person on this team said
you belong here. So I'm bringing you in here. And
then when I tell the story on my Instagram and
on my podcast, it ends up getting turned into this

(30:40):
whole other thing of you don't belong here. Amanda Seals
doesn't belong here, And that's the thing that's a narrative
that has come about, Like I don't perpetuate.

Speaker 3 (30:49):
Yes, I don't belong in these places.

Speaker 4 (30:51):
And what ended up happening two days later is that
I got a call from Lisa and she called me
and said, Hey, I heard what happened this weekend. I
just want you to know I have nothing to do
with it. Would you be willing to talk to Vanessa? No.

Speaker 2 (31:07):
I try to talk Vanessa at the party.

Speaker 3 (31:11):
Sit two days too late. So I've never talked about
this publicly.

Speaker 4 (31:20):
Because it has always been incredibly important to me to
protect Lisa, because I know that Issa is doing something
within this business that so few people get to do,
and it's not something I desire to do, like I'm
not interested in getting one hundred million dollar production deal,
Like that's not a life that I want for myself.
But I know that her role is very important, and
so I've always protected Lisa. However, there's just been enough

(31:42):
instances at this point where I should have been protected
by Lisa and I wasn't. And one of my biggest
problems that we have discussed several times in this interview
is that I think people are going to show up
for me the way I show up for them, And
now it's at a point where my protecting of Lisa
has become turned on to me and something that people
are using against me. There's a whole narrative that is

(32:03):
completely false that people keep spinning. They keep saying, you
know that I'm this mean girl on this set, that
I that I that I harmed these people on this set.
I just want to point out something very basic. How
can I be a mean girl on a set that
ain't my set? How it's your show. You are my boss.
I don't even have the capacity to be the mean

(32:25):
girl here because you can fire me. So there's no
way for me to be a mean girl in this situation.
And I know some people that may buck up against
like the confirmation bias that they've created, but it simply
is the truth.

Speaker 3 (32:39):
You know.

Speaker 4 (32:39):
When I got to that show, I had had a
show on Lisa's website on YouTube, I have my show
Get Your Life. And when it came out on her
instant on her YouTube, unfortunately the press picked it up
as Lisa Ray's new show.

Speaker 3 (32:54):
But I'm but she hadn't. She didn't do anything except
put it on her.

Speaker 4 (32:56):
Site, Like I put all my money into it, I
wrote it, I started, et cetera, and so I said, hey,
you know, would you mind, you know, tweeting to correct this?

Speaker 3 (33:04):
And she just wouldn't.

Speaker 4 (33:06):
She wouldn't promote any of the shows, you know, And
I just felt like that was unfortunate, But it didn't
make me. It didn't change my view of her character,
like it just let me know, like, Okay, this is
how she do business. But in that time, her publicist
was interacting with me and was from just day one
just so acerbic, like just vitrol it for no reason,

(33:28):
to the point where Lisa's business manager had to say
to the publicists like, can you please try and.

Speaker 3 (33:33):
Be kinder to Amanda? She's like a talent on our channel, do.

Speaker 2 (33:37):
You and you have no reason why she would treat
you behave.

Speaker 3 (33:46):
So Lisa says, would you talk to Vanessa?

Speaker 4 (33:50):
No? I said, sure, you know why? Why who's my boss?
Who's my boss in this situation?

Speaker 2 (34:00):
What is the boss?

Speaker 3 (34:01):
And where do I have to go back to work?
So what's the game you talked about?

Speaker 2 (34:06):
You had to play the game.

Speaker 1 (34:09):
But hold on, but there was a situation earlier Amanda,
Well you said that ain't my business.

Speaker 2 (34:14):
Y'all need to handle that.

Speaker 3 (34:16):
Now she wants you to talk to her you're good
at math. You good at math sharpedon Shannon shopping.

Speaker 4 (34:24):
I'm just I'm just saying because you like you can't
spell sharp and without shop.

Speaker 3 (34:28):
Now, So, okay, you have So I take the call.

Speaker 2 (34:35):
You should just say I want to meet face to face.
I want to look one. I like to look a person.

Speaker 3 (34:38):
My feelings were hurt. My feelings were hurt.

Speaker 4 (34:43):
I just got assaulted in a party for black people
in Hollywood. And I've been in Hollywood longer than.

Speaker 3 (34:49):
Majority of the people in this fucking party, right, my
feelings are hurt.

Speaker 2 (34:54):
Okay, you take the call.

Speaker 3 (34:56):
Hello, Hey, Mana, this is Vanessa. I just want you
to know that.

Speaker 4 (35:01):
So none of this has anything to do with Lisa.
That's the first thing she says. None of this has
anything to do with Lisa.

Speaker 3 (35:06):
So I just want you to know that. But I
do want you to understand that it was me who
kicked you out the party. Okay. So I just want
you to know that the reason I kicked you at
the party is because I don't like you. Okay.

Speaker 4 (35:21):
Well that's all I need to know. There's nothing else
for us to talk about, and I hang up. She
calls me back immediately.

Speaker 3 (35:26):
Why do you hang up?

Speaker 4 (35:27):
I said, because there's nothing else for us to talk about.
She says, don't you want to know why I don't
like you?

Speaker 5 (35:30):
No?

Speaker 2 (35:31):
Not, actually, actually I don't.

Speaker 4 (35:32):
No, I don't because it's none of my business. I've
never done anything to you, and for you to put
me in harm's way off of literally nothing means that
I don't need to talk to you about why you
don't like me. You need to talk to your therapist
about why you don't like me. And I hung up
the phone.

Speaker 3 (35:46):
She called back, No, she called around. She starts a
smear campaign.

Speaker 1 (35:51):
Oh so this whole time your boss and I don't
like I don't. I don't do the gossip thing. So
to have you ever had a conversation with Asa about
this situation about her publicist?

Speaker 3 (36:06):
You're saying, since the situation at any point? Well, I
mean I had that one time where I said to you, yeah,
and she.

Speaker 2 (36:12):
Said, well that y'all need to work. That ain't got
nothing to do with me.

Speaker 4 (36:15):
So now, after this conversation with the publicist and I
get off the phone, I start getting word that she
is going around to the different publications and different people,
because it starts coming back to me and she's going
around saying that I was in danger of getting fired
from Insecure, which I honestly I don't even know if

(36:36):
that was true or not, but I had never that
had never been brought to my attention. She starts going
around saying that I got in a fight at the party.
She starts going around saying that I peede on the floor.

Speaker 3 (36:48):
At the party.

Speaker 2 (36:49):
What are you a puppy?

Speaker 4 (36:51):
I got to move it to the side, Like what
are we talking about? So well, I feel like I'm
gonna answer your question, okay. So Esa then calls me
again and says, hey, I just want to know if
this is going to be a problem on set, because
now this is going on for two weeks and this.

Speaker 3 (37:12):
Going viral.

Speaker 4 (37:17):
In earlier in the conversation, you were like, why do
you care if people who don't know you like are
saying mean things about you? And it's like, I wish
I had that, And I'm at a point in my
life where I'm there.

Speaker 2 (37:29):
But.

Speaker 4 (37:32):
It's really up when the pylon happens and it has
nothing to do with reality, Like I don't even mind
a pylon if it's something I really did. This situation,
I'm like, how am I the villain in this situation. Well,
you shouldn't have gone to her party because it was
her party. Well it's not just her party. There's several
people at the party. It's not like I crashed her

(37:54):
baby shower. But also I'm looking at Issa because it's like,
this is your responsibility. We are both to your employees,
and this is a part of leadership. This is the
important part of leadership. And that's what makes leadership so
annoying is you're going to manage people. Yes, you do,
and personalities and it's a very difficult task, but it
is part for the course.

Speaker 1 (38:14):
Yes, but that's why you got the hundred million or
whatever you got, is to manage your employees.

Speaker 4 (38:20):
So I said, you know, listen, I am not saying
that it's going to be a problem on set, but
I do think it is a problem that you don't
feel that you need to step in. And she was like, well,
then we just have a different in opinion, Like I
just this is this is between y'all. This is between y'all.

Speaker 1 (38:35):
Well, if it was between us, why did you intervene
and say I need to that she wanted to call
I needed to talk to her. If you felt it
was just between us, because you interjected yourself into that.
If it's between two people, I shouldn't have interference for
someone else to say we need to get together the
two people either she reaches out to me or I
reach out to her. I don't need you to intervene,
but you felt the need to intervene in that. But

(38:57):
now you don't feel an intervene to go anything up
the intervention to go any futher.

Speaker 2 (39:02):
Oh I'm sorry.

Speaker 4 (39:05):
So I'm also promoting my book right, so this hits
me because now the press is canceling. So this is
now affecting me professionally. And I didn't do shit right
and I don't like you, in my opinion, is not
a sufficient reason to sick for security guards on me
and remove me from a black space, which also begs

(39:27):
the question what the fuck is a black space? Because
we like to claim that they're safe spaces, and you
know that they're for us, but at this point black
spaces are literally it's just black faces, and that even
is you know something to do with this pressure that
I've been going through, but to stay on course, So.

Speaker 3 (39:46):
Now we have to go back to shooting.

Speaker 2 (39:48):
Mm hmm. Uncomfortable I'm uncomfortable.

Speaker 4 (39:53):
And I ain't ey more sick, and nobody's saying nothing
to me. Everybody knows because at this time it's just
the women shooting. Everybody knows what's going on. They don't
say nothing to me, and that's just fucking mean.

Speaker 3 (40:07):
It's mean. They don't say nothing to me.

Speaker 4 (40:09):
And let me tell you from the beginning, I've been
trying with these ladies because I want to.

Speaker 3 (40:14):
Make community everywhere I go. I didn't invited them to
my house.

Speaker 4 (40:18):
They didn't come. I brought them gifts, they said thanks.
I tried to plan a retreat. They said, we don't
want to go. You know, I put I created our
group chat for the show. I created game nights for
the show.

Speaker 2 (40:28):
You why to participate it?

Speaker 3 (40:30):
I mean eventually, but like reluctantly. But I'm trying to do.

Speaker 4 (40:36):
This, you know, because I think that this is It's
like when I walked in and I was like, I
feel like it's my role to make you feel comfortable.
Like I feel like that's my way of getting around
this thing, this stigma that people like to put on
me that they got to do with how I really exist?

Speaker 2 (40:53):
Okay, and.

Speaker 4 (41:00):
In this situation now I'm publicly now being like excoriated.
You got this earthworm gym looking Nigga Sarunas out here
talking about well, you don't.

Speaker 3 (41:11):
No one likes you, so that's why you weren't invited.

Speaker 4 (41:13):
What's hilarious about that is that we were only in
two scenes together, So this is not somebody that really
knows me.

Speaker 3 (41:18):
But you know what the other thing is, Shannon Sharpton.
This is a brother who ended up.

Speaker 4 (41:26):
Having a child with someone on the show, and when
he had the child, there was rumors that were going
around that he was not claiming the child, and so
these people had started talking about it. But the people
that are talking about Ami people. I'm not involved in it,

(41:46):
but I hear it because we do say and then
he come around and it is, hey, I don't like
like that.

Speaker 3 (41:55):
I don't like like that.

Speaker 4 (41:56):
It's not honest. So even though that's not my boy,
I pull him to the side. I said, Pete, people
I hear are talking about you behind your back about
this situation, and I said, listen, this is a small business.
So at the end of the day, if you are
this child's father, I think you should explain it to

(42:17):
the rooftops.

Speaker 3 (42:18):
If you are not claimed. If you are and you
don't want to claim.

Speaker 4 (42:21):
This child, I would like for you to just consider
rethinking that because as somebody with a father that did
not show up for me, I really feel like she
would really benefit from having a father in her life.

Speaker 3 (42:32):
And he was like, well, why ain't nobody coming to me?

Speaker 4 (42:34):
I said, I'm literally coming to you right now, and
you ain't even my peoples. But I don't think it's
fair that you're being talked about behind your back by
people that you think are your people's.

Speaker 3 (42:45):
He said, well, you know, thank you for that.

Speaker 4 (42:47):
That's the same nigga that fixed his mouth to jump
on the bandwagon if we hate Amanda, because it was
a bandwagon and he want to be seen. He thought
maybe he was going to He thought he was going
to get an extra right, he thought he was going
to get an extra scene or something. So now we're
on set and I finally say that. He said, so,
are you just not going to talk about this because

(43:08):
it's now going on for three weeks and my mental
health is suffering, okay, and.

Speaker 2 (43:18):
I just what.

Speaker 3 (43:18):
I just it was a tough time.

Speaker 4 (43:21):
And she's like, well, you know, like what do you
want to talk about and I said, listen, like this
was a terrible experience.

Speaker 3 (43:30):
This was terrible.

Speaker 4 (43:32):
I like literally cried, like face to face with her,
like this is terrible, and she's like, this is the
first time.

Speaker 3 (43:37):
She finally says like, well, I'm sorry that happened to you.

Speaker 4 (43:40):
It took three conversations and I said, well, you know,
I'd like to talk to you further because I need
you to speak to Vanessa. She is trying to ruin
my career. She's like, I don't think so, like she's
trying to ruin my O. Like, so I bring her
into the room, I bring her into my trailer, and
I had to do another four laws of power.

Speaker 3 (44:01):
I sat her on a higher plane than.

Speaker 4 (44:03):
Myself so that she can feel as the queen, and
in this setting she is the queen, right, And I say,
you know, I don't need nothing from you, so I
don't have a reason to lie to you. But the
people that work for you, like in close quarters, as
whose names are really attached to you, they will lie

(44:25):
to you. And I had to convince her that like
this is really happening, like I'm not making this up,
and even if it's turns out to me not happening.
I still need you to speak to her to deduce
what it is, what is or isn't right. So then
she she finally went and spoke to her. The damage
is done, right because now you see how every few

(44:46):
years this becomes a thing. And it was started from
a lie, right, it was started from a lie. And
you know, it's not about convincing people, because I don't
need to convince nobody of nothing. But I just don't
ever feel comfortab with people forming opinions not based on truth. Shin.
I got in trouble with saying nigga uninsecure. I got

(45:10):
in trouble for telling a brother he was a revolutionary
nigga in trouble, like literally got pulled aside and was told,
we need to talk about the incident that you had.

Speaker 2 (45:21):
I guess when you in corporate, you got to keep
it corporate. Man.

Speaker 4 (45:24):
We say nigga on the show. We say nigga all
day on this mother show. And it was a black
woman who pulled me to the side. And this brother
is tagged from the neck down where eating ed the
bulls on set from Detroit.

Speaker 3 (45:40):
I mean, that's nigga.

Speaker 4 (45:45):
But I had said to him, I had said because
someone there was like a Malcolm X quote in my
trailer and he sets my trailer, my closing my trailer.

Speaker 3 (45:50):
So I came to him. I was like, hey, did
you leave that Malcolm X cot in my trailer? And
he was like nah. I was like, damn, you don't
need revolutionary nigga around here. He was like, I'm not
a nigga. And I said, okay, I get it. Hm
who said that? And I kept it moving. This was
the incident. So she's like, we need to talk about
the incident and I said, well, what incident?

Speaker 4 (46:12):
Well, when you just referred to him as a nigga,
so I actually I refer to as a revolutionary nigga.

Speaker 3 (46:18):
It was a compliment. Yeah, But when he said he's
not a nigga, you didn't take it back. I said,
like you mean like take back seats, I mean, where
are we at?

Speaker 4 (46:30):
And she was like, well, I said, but we literally
say nigga on this show, like literally. She was like, well,
you're gonna need to apologize to him. But this is
the action of like I need to you need to
bow down. People are aways trying to get me to
like apologize for I didn't do wrong because they because
they feel like I'm too haughty, they feel I'm too
sure of myself.

Speaker 3 (46:50):
They feel like I need to be cut.

Speaker 4 (46:51):
Down to size all the time. And the unfortunate part
of that is that it's not a reflection of me.
It's a reflection of them, right, because what is it
about me that makes you feel small?

Speaker 3 (47:02):
And you want me to get down to your level?
Why do you feel small? What's going on with you?
Who made you feel that way? That's not fair to you?
Come on, rise up, it's in you. You know what
I'm saying, Like, that's that's really what that is. So
she brings him into my trailer.

Speaker 2 (47:20):
You fake apologize.

Speaker 4 (47:25):
Because she there and I was like, oh, you're good.
She's like, no, I need to stay in case something happens.

Speaker 3 (47:30):
What's gonna happen? I look at him. What you think
is going to happen? He's like, I don't know.

Speaker 4 (47:34):
I was like, oh my god, I said, you know what,
I apologize for calling you nigga. I did not intend
to offend you. Of course, in my head what I
said was I should have called you a bit, but
I didn't say I didn't say that. I didn't say that,
but it felt like right, it felt like, so now
we got to shoot the car scene when we're driving

(47:54):
in Malibu.

Speaker 3 (47:55):
So we in the car and I'm telling them about
what happened.

Speaker 4 (47:58):
And I started crying because I'm a say in soul
and because this felt like another instance where I.

Speaker 3 (48:03):
Was being like bullied. And he said laugh at my
mother as I was crying and said, well, you know,
you do have a tone.

Speaker 4 (48:14):
At the end of season one, I pulled eas aside
at after this, I said, can we go to dinner?

Speaker 3 (48:19):
I want to take you to dinner. I took her
to dinner.

Speaker 4 (48:22):
I said, you know, I said, I feel like you
think I have something against you, and I just I
don't know why you feel that way, because we had
been cool from even before this. She was like, well, no,
I said, I feel like you have something against me,
and she said, well, I think you I feel like
you have something against me.

Speaker 3 (48:34):
And I was like, based on whatman? Because against Shannon,
I'm on your show.

Speaker 2 (48:39):
Right, I can't do nothing like I'm I'm only to
get scenes adding if you add them.

Speaker 3 (48:46):
I'm in pocket, baby, I can't do nothing.

Speaker 4 (48:50):
So I said, well, why, I guess I was looking
at you like your character am I that good of
an actress. She wrote the character bro what and so

(49:10):
I said, you know what, So let's clean the slate
because that's just not.

Speaker 3 (49:16):
I had nothing against you. I really don't. And if
that came off, that was not my intention.

Speaker 4 (49:25):
But by the end of the show, you know, there
were just certain scenarios where I had to really always
be the bigger person and be the bomb to the situation.
And then in season five she came out of her
face when she just came out of her face at
me one time too many, and I just chose to
stop being the bomb because the show was rapping.

Speaker 3 (49:41):
It was the end of the season. It was end
of the series, and I'm just not going to keep
doing this.

Speaker 2 (49:45):
So what did you do?

Speaker 3 (49:47):
Nothing? I just stopped communicating.

Speaker 1 (49:49):
Oh, I mean, I had a little real and he
says that Easa is like most of her set is
with women, camera people, et cetera, et cetera, and that
she's very empowering to women.

Speaker 3 (50:00):
Oh I disagree. She wasn't empowering to me.

Speaker 4 (50:02):
She didn't feel like I needed. She just feel like
I deserved to be protected. I'm only giving a module.
I'm only giving a portion of this. Yeah, So but
that was my experience, and nonetheless I have still always
protected her because I felt like it was my responsibility.

Speaker 3 (50:16):
To do so.

Speaker 2 (50:16):
But it is not connect you this when you received
the backlash for the sorority the AKA, do they understand
that this is a shit? I don't know.

Speaker 3 (50:29):
I got them. I never understood that.

Speaker 1 (50:31):
Do you feel now that everybody just nitpicks? They just
find like, Okay, a man they got on red today?
Why she wearing red?

Speaker 3 (50:38):
What do you think?

Speaker 2 (50:39):
I mean?

Speaker 3 (50:40):
Does it sound like that?

Speaker 2 (50:41):
Is that how you feel?

Speaker 3 (50:42):
Absolutely? They are always looking for something.

Speaker 4 (50:46):
Even these hack writers, who were probably paid by APAK,
they wrote articles based on tweets, tweets. They wrote articles
based on not only my tweets, on other people's tweets,
like this random person said Amanda needs to change her
energy Black Enterprise, or an entire article that said Amanda

(51:08):
Seals complains that she's not invited into black spaces. Mind you,
these are all spaces that I have worked in and
there and said and the follow up line was, but
the Internet, So they anthropomorphized the entire internet. The internet
says Amanda needs to change her energy. I do not
need to change my energy. I don't and all of

(51:30):
those spaces, aside from Black Girl's Rock, have contacted me.

Speaker 3 (51:34):
I don't need to change my energy.

Speaker 4 (51:37):
What needs to change is how we look at energy
and how we understand energies that aren't necessarily our own.
So even as we sat here and we have talked,
I have had to understand your energy, and you.

Speaker 3 (51:49):
Have asked me to do that.

Speaker 4 (51:51):
And even though it may not be my own, we
live in this space together, we live on this earth together.
So we have to gain certain abilities to do that,
and that requires a lesser ego. That requires curiosity, which
I consider to be an indicative of love. It requires humanity,

(52:11):
Like we live in a world that is continuously creating
borders to keep people out because we feel like they
don't deserve to be here because they're different, or because
they love some a different kind of person, or they
believe in something different, etc. And I just I am
not that kind of person. I've never been that kind
of person. And it is so it is so liberating
for me to understand that the reasons that people have

(52:35):
been telling me. So you're talking about the nitpicking, it's
not just nitpicking. They assign something to what they're nitpicking
Amanda has a tone because she's mean. Amanda said this
because she thinks she's better than other black people. Amanda
said what she said because she's nasty. None of these
things are true, but it feels terrible for people to

(52:58):
assign things to you that are not true, and you
start to think to yourself, if this is what it's
like for me to be myself, then maybe I shouldn't
be here. And as somebody who has had a full
on nervous breakdown and been suicidal, it is not to
be taken lightly when people attack character without legitimate.

Speaker 3 (53:25):
Reasons, why credibility, etc.

Speaker 4 (53:29):
And I was told that one of these publications, it
was told to them, you know, this is the type
of thing that can drive someone to take their own life.

Speaker 3 (53:38):
And they said, don't go there. This is not a game.

Speaker 4 (53:47):
This whole last month has been such a journey of
self by fire, right Like I was forced to have
this journey of self by fire simply because I wanted
to be embraced in spaces that I embrace.

Speaker 3 (54:00):
Like there's no scandal. I was supposed to go to Howard.

Speaker 4 (54:03):
To do an event, and I was told that Howard
rescinded my invitation because of these stories, these stories that
I have no validity to them, and that I have
not you know, been a catalyst too, but they are
now they're proving to be deleterious to like my advancement.
Oh Amanda Seals was she was attacking Samaria Rice? What

(54:26):
I asked a valid question that ended up being proven
by the way I asked a valid question.

Speaker 3 (54:31):
Don't we think that there's something worth questioning?

Speaker 4 (54:33):
And why this this woman whose son was one hundred
percent unjustly killed by the police. Don't we think that
there's something to be said for like why are all
these media outlets like giving her a platform to accuse
all of these people that are the leaders of.

Speaker 3 (54:47):
Movements of fraud?

Speaker 4 (54:50):
And you know, my problem is also that I think
that people understand what I'm saying when I say something.
And like when I wrote my first book, my uncle,
who judge in Grenada, he was like, make sure you
edit that book like a deposition, because it's on paper
and people cannot read your mind.

Speaker 3 (55:11):
So say it how you want it to be understood, yep,
which is difficult in one hundred and forty characters, it is.

Speaker 4 (55:17):
But what I was saying with that statement was why
are all of these black media outlets giving a platform
without any level of journalism behind it. That is dangerous,
and they're putting these people mind you. I don't even
know Sean King, but again, what am I about?

Speaker 2 (55:36):
Justice?

Speaker 3 (55:37):
This is my ats, the goddess of truth and justice.
This is unjustified.

Speaker 4 (55:41):
He was asked by her brother to raise money, when
he got the money and found out that she didn't know.

Speaker 3 (55:47):
She was given the money.

Speaker 4 (55:49):
These types of turning this space into a gossip space
is dangerous, Shannon.

Speaker 3 (55:55):
We're trying to make movements and change.

Speaker 2 (55:58):
You do realize that's how social media your work. You
don't have to be qualified.

Speaker 4 (56:05):
But no, I'm not talking about I'm not talking about
social media. This is Black Voices and.

Speaker 3 (56:11):
Rio and the Root, et cetera.

Speaker 4 (56:13):
They were just running with this story because that's how
journalism works now, clicks. So in their minds, it seems like, well,
if we put this story out, we're gonna get the clicks,
and then they were going to be follow ups, and
we'll get clicks for that, and then there's gonna be
follow up. So let's not tell the whole story. Now,
let's string this along soap opera. People's lives. So I
was justified in that. People mad at me because I said,

(56:35):
you know, if you got Nikes and Jordan's, if you
got money for Nikes and Jordans, you're gonna passport. You're
losing a man that seeals a member of the petty bourgeoisine.
She is making fun of the disenfranchised passport black folks.
What are you talking about? Do you understand these people
don't want us here. They don't want us here. We
need to be able to get out of here. When

(56:56):
you go all over this world, white people are everywhere.
Did you know that they everywhere having a great time?

Speaker 3 (57:01):
And we be thinking that we are only allowed to
be here. This world is for us. We are the
bottom line. We are the creators.

Speaker 4 (57:08):
So why would we not make sure that we have
access to everything instead of limiting ourselves to consumerism. We
can do both, Yes, we can do both. And one
thing I've had to learn is just like sometimes I
just be talking right now. By the way, the reason
I sent that text is because I was sitting in
the Paris Charles Degall Airport and the Nigga I was
seeing I had text him and said I got to Paris,
I can't wait for you to get your passport and

(57:29):
travel with me, And he has said, I don't need
a passport.

Speaker 3 (57:32):
I travel in my mind.

Speaker 2 (57:35):
That's how body see.

Speaker 3 (57:39):
That's what made me say that tweet. But again no
further context.

Speaker 4 (57:44):
But people do nitpick, and it sucks because you start
to believe the lies that people tell you about yourself,
and then you start to turn into the person that
they are accusing you of being. They want you to
be somebody who doesn't give a fun. They want you
to be somebody who doesn't care if you hurt people.
And I will say that most people don't get the
opportunity to do a blanket apology, but since I have it,
I'll take it. I apologize to anybody that I have

(58:07):
unwillingly caused any level of discomfort.

Speaker 3 (58:11):
That's never my goal, never my goal.

Speaker 4 (58:15):
And anyone who's taking that apology and knowing that it's
not for you, because it wasn't.

Speaker 1 (58:21):
For you, considering what's been the way you've been portrayed.
And you said, Lisa said, well, your character. I believe
that you were your character considering he wrote the character.
Do you ever get afraid of being type cast?

Speaker 5 (58:44):
No?

Speaker 4 (58:45):
Because again I think everybody gets afraid of being type cast.
I mean, especially like if you light skin, like there's
in black spaces. Oftentimes it's like, Okay, you're gonna play
like the boogie light skined girl.

Speaker 5 (58:55):
You know.

Speaker 4 (58:57):
I think that there's something to be said for like
I get accused being colorists based on stuff like that,
you know, like which I am one thousand percent not
by any means. I think in the past there were
things that were like misinterpreted that have It's not even
that they've typecast me, like on camera. It's like I'm
type cast in life right right, So like people like

(59:19):
I remember on a breakfast club interview, they asked me, like,
what are reasons people don't like you? This is always
the conversation, what are reasons people don't like you? So
I went down the list of reasons that people have
told me that they don't like me, and one of
the reasons was someone that I have been told several times,
I don't like you because you're life skinned.

Speaker 3 (59:35):
And I said that, and that offended people because they
thought that I was somehow.

Speaker 4 (59:42):
In saying that, saying that it was something as a
like there was something positive, you know, And ultimately.

Speaker 3 (59:52):
There is no way in the.

Speaker 4 (59:57):
There is no way in the dissemination, the effect dissemination
of white supremacy that we would not have dark skinned
women who don't like you because you like skin, and
like skin women who don't like you because you dark skin.
They have been very effective at that division. Yeah, So
I was just stating a fact, but not stating a.

Speaker 5 (01:00:20):
Like.

Speaker 4 (01:00:20):
I wasn't trying to legitimize it. It was just like,
this is something that has been said to me, you know,
and I am. And it took me also a little
bit to understand that colorism only works one way. I
don't know if bullying is the right word for what
happens to like skin black folks who feel like they
don't belong because that's the thing, Like I get told like, oh,

(01:00:42):
you like skin, You're not really black, but like, I'm
like skin because my great great great grandmother was raped
by James Ooh in Virginia or in Maryland, i should say,
who then subsequently had children every month after that for
twelve months with other slaves that he owned, and he

(01:01:04):
put his name on their birth certificates.

Speaker 3 (01:01:08):
And this means that I'm also possibly related to Robert E.

Speaker 5 (01:01:10):
Lee.

Speaker 4 (01:01:13):
I am light skinned because my great grandmother on my
mother's side was raped by her boss when she was
a maid in Greeta. So I just feel like we
oversimplify in a way that feeds this white supremacist ideology
and instead of looking to each other to say how

(01:01:35):
do we starve it with love and loving each other?

Speaker 3 (01:01:38):
So you know, I am not colorists.

Speaker 4 (01:01:40):
There are many times where I have had to consciously
remove myself from space is because these people don't know
what they're talking about, and they're like, well, you're black,
you know, like this, this designer in Russia wanted me
to be the phase of.

Speaker 3 (01:01:50):
Her Africa campaign. I said, ma'am, the only way I
can do that is if.

Speaker 4 (01:01:55):
I am partnered an equal level with a dark skinned
person from the continents.

Speaker 3 (01:02:01):
And they were like, oh, you're just doing too much.
Now we don't even see race.

Speaker 2 (01:02:07):
Don't you just love that one? Okay? Currently you're on
Kevin Hart's LOL network. No, you're done.

Speaker 3 (01:02:13):
That ended like two years ago.

Speaker 2 (01:02:18):
Kevin.

Speaker 1 (01:02:19):
People's taking shots at keV. I know keV a little bit.
I don't, but I think he's I think he's great
at what he does. I know he's an extremely hard worker.
He puts a lot of time into his craft. Uh,
and he's built a platform that that tries to elevate people.

Speaker 4 (01:02:34):
Oh lord, I think that's his goal. But I don't
know that his staff has the same fervor for that
that he does. Okay, And I don't know that he's
necessary I don't. I'm saying this literally, like I don't
know if he's left, if he's necessarily empowered them to
do that.

Speaker 3 (01:02:50):
I literally don't know.

Speaker 4 (01:02:51):
I know that he voiced his intentions to me, but
they were unable to be carried out right. And I
have no hard feelings keV. Ke looked out for me
in a situation that was, you know, Live Nation tried
to cancel my whole tour and I had to call

(01:03:13):
people I know that you know got the juice, and
keV answered the call.

Speaker 2 (01:03:20):
That's unbelievable.

Speaker 3 (01:03:21):
And it was a time where I didn't have other jobs.

Speaker 4 (01:03:24):
So if I didn't do them shows, there was no
money because my man made no money and he wasn't
trying to make no money, so I was the only
one making the money. And I remember sitting in my
living rooms like staring off into space, and he came
in because I was quiet, and if Amanda is quiet,
we and the problem. And my man came my ex
he came in and was like, was you good? And

(01:03:48):
I was like no, because if I don't do these shows,
we will not have money for the beals. And so
I really appreciate keV because he didn't have to do that,
and he did right.

Speaker 2 (01:04:01):
Bring the funny. You spoke highly of that, Chrissy tig
and Jeff fox Worthy of Keenan Thompson.

Speaker 3 (01:04:06):
I do have a radio show now, though, tell us
about it.

Speaker 2 (01:04:10):
What do you get to talk? What do you what
do you like about the radio show now?

Speaker 1 (01:04:13):
Because you obviously you're very opinionated, you have I mean,
you have a lot to say, and when you're on the.

Speaker 2 (01:04:18):
Radio, you get to take your time and go tell
us about your radio show.

Speaker 1 (01:04:23):
People that are listening Amanda for the first time, what
can they expect to listen, laugh and learn.

Speaker 4 (01:04:29):
They're gonna laugh and they gonna learn all day long.
I love my radio show Radio one Reach Media. They've
just been such great partners. It really showed me what
it's like to work in a place that sees you.
You know, that came correct from day one. I never
I never have to convince them of anything. You know,
they respect my wisdom about things, they expect my my

(01:04:51):
awareness about things, so I don't have to, you.

Speaker 3 (01:04:55):
Know, try to win over.

Speaker 4 (01:04:57):
And I always thought that my own show would be
a TV show, but it's a radio show and it
ends up being so much better because I have so
much freedom and I get to speak to people where
we're right now. We're syndicated in a number of scenes,
including DC. We're on Magic in DC, We're on one
O three in Philly, We're in Houston on the Box.

(01:05:18):
You know, we're in major markets. And I just didn't
realize that people really be listening to TV, I mean
to radio. People really be listening to radio Shannon, and
so it's just been really great to see how many
people like I member. So we do a word of
the Day where I teach a vocabulary word and this
bus driver I went to Selma for the commemoration of
Bloody Sunday, and this bus driver in Alabama, because we're

(01:05:38):
on in muscle shows, she was like, I just want
you to know that I play your radio show in
the bus for my kids. And she was like, our
favorite segment is the vocab segment. So I have my
co host Supreme, and I just make it my business.
I take it very seriously that a lot of people
are only getting this news from me, So I just

(01:06:00):
make it my business to be very fat based and
then opinion right, you know, because I think we've gotten
in a world where we can't really tell when is
facts and when is opinion. Yeah, and that's dangerous.

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(01:07:13):
may apply. You talked about your time on the reel
and you talked about the bad. Did you have any
good times on the reel? Was there anything that you
liked about your time there?

Speaker 3 (01:07:24):
I like my team in my dressing room.

Speaker 4 (01:07:30):
Listen, your glam squad in those situations, be your family
because you.

Speaker 3 (01:07:32):
There so early in the morning every day, you know.

Speaker 4 (01:07:37):
Let me just be clear though, like people like to
say that I had issues with my co hosts on
the reel, and I have never voiced that, and none
of them have ever voiced that. And my issue with
the reel was about the executive leadership of the reel
and the fact that we couldn't talk about like they
would say things like I remember Tamara wanted to talk
about wine and they were like, well, black people don't

(01:07:58):
drink wine, so we're not gonna talking about.

Speaker 3 (01:08:00):
Whe Wow, just like, how's that a thing?

Speaker 4 (01:08:08):
But I don't want to say that I didn't have
a good time at the Real. It's just that I
walked into it and I got blindsided. That's really what happened, Shannon.
I got blindsided. I thought that this was going to
be a space where I could like really be myself
because when I was guest host, they were so embracing,
and it just ended up not being that. But you

(01:08:28):
know what really happened at the Real I taught I
reminded those women of their voices. That's what they always
tell me, because they had gotten so used to the
books that they had just laid down their swords. And
so I get there and they would be happening and
I'd be like, oh, hell na right, and they'd be like, well,
we didn't even know we could say.

Speaker 5 (01:08:46):
No.

Speaker 1 (01:08:49):
I'm reading and I read this, and I'm like, when
I was doing for you about the Black Publications, know
that that that.

Speaker 2 (01:08:56):
That spoke out against you.

Speaker 1 (01:08:58):
I mean, because you speak so pro black, and just
because you're pro black doesn't mean you're anti this. That
means you just I want my people to do really well,
and I want my people to understand and be informed
and understand the power that they have.

Speaker 2 (01:09:14):
It had to have hurt to have these black publications.

Speaker 3 (01:09:18):
I had a nervous breakdown.

Speaker 2 (01:09:29):
Talk to me.

Speaker 4 (01:09:33):
It's just the willingness of folks to sell their souls
for so little, And I feel like that's what you
have to do to put your gift of being a
writer to work in such a nefarious way.

Speaker 3 (01:09:48):
I ain't in none of these people. I ain't done
none of these people.

Speaker 4 (01:09:51):
I like to think that they were paid by a
pack because if you didn't get a check for this
and you just did this just to do it, I'm
just like, damn that that's unfortunate for you.

Speaker 3 (01:10:05):
But that's a place that I've arrived at initially.

Speaker 6 (01:10:09):
It just.

Speaker 4 (01:10:12):
It's crazy to be excoriated in the public in general
by like, you know, just people, but like.

Speaker 1 (01:10:20):
Publication where they're supposed to have people that are journalists
that have integrity, right.

Speaker 3 (01:10:25):
Yeah, Like that's crazy.

Speaker 4 (01:10:27):
Like the last time this happened was with this MYNN
role situation years ago, where I was put in a
very stup situation. I had to make a judgment call,
and people have based my entire character off of this judgment.
Call people who have never been in this situation. But
I did the best that I could with that situation,
and I have been affirmed in that choice. But I

(01:10:48):
think that what people fail to understand is that you
be in scenarios where you got to make a judgment.

Speaker 2 (01:10:53):
Call instantaneous, you don't have you.

Speaker 3 (01:10:56):
And you just doing the best that you got with
something that doesn't have a blueprint.

Speaker 2 (01:11:00):
Right.

Speaker 3 (01:11:01):
And so now there's this whole narrative a man that
steels hates black men, that it has no literally no water.
If I hate black men, I want to refund.

Speaker 4 (01:11:12):
I want to.

Speaker 3 (01:11:12):
Refund sing you know how many brothers I have lifted up.
I want to refund.

Speaker 4 (01:11:17):
I don't pay probation fees because the niggas could rap,
and I want them to be able to live in
their talent and their truth. I don't talk to a
damn poh to vouch body, James, and you owe me money.
But like, there's just something very wrong about these places.
Feeling compelled to just speak about somebody with no facts

(01:11:40):
at least quote somebody I've worked with.

Speaker 3 (01:11:42):
If you're gonna say I'm difficult to work with.

Speaker 4 (01:11:43):
I mean, it's burning bridges in Hollywood maybe ain't no
bridges in Hollywood.

Speaker 3 (01:11:48):
This Hollywood is a shark infested pool.

Speaker 4 (01:11:52):
The only bridge I built was to get me out
of it so I would stop getting did so please
so telling me about burning bridges? And then there's there
in there talking about Oh, she's Hubris. Do y'all even
know what Hubris means. Hubris is a mythological character from

(01:12:13):
Greek mythology who was told by the gods, don't look
in that pool, don't look in that pool.

Speaker 3 (01:12:21):
And Hubris said, Man, I'm gonna look in the pool.
He defied the gods.

Speaker 4 (01:12:25):
He looked in the pool, and he saw his face,
and he was so enamored by his face that he
drowned in the pool. So Hubris is not someone who
is necessarily enamored by themselves. Hubris is the story of
a person who defied God. Now you tell me in
this whole interview, where have I showed you that I'm
somebody who is defying God. I live by God, I

(01:12:47):
am spoken to by God. I speak the word. So
don't tell me about these words. So journalists using these
words so gratuitously is dangerous. It's so dangerous, And I
am obsessed with words I'm obsessed with word, Shannon. I
love them so much, and I know that there's people
who have lived by the word. If you are somebody
of a religion, you live by the word, whether it's

(01:13:10):
the word of our law or the word of the Bible.
You know, if you're somebody who's a lawyer, you understand
that this Constitution and the words that are not in
it are what continue to keep us oppressed.

Speaker 3 (01:13:18):
Words matter.

Speaker 4 (01:13:19):
So to have all these people using these words that
I love so much against me, damn near killed me.
Thank goodness, I'm on Lexapro because had I not been
on this antidepressant, I feel like I would have gone
down a much darker hole. But I have a great
psychiatrist and I have even better friends. So when you

(01:13:40):
talk about people protecting you, they be I am protected.
I am so loved, And that's why it's so wild
to see people saying I'm not likable.

Speaker 3 (01:13:48):
You are right, I'm not likable. I am lovable.

Speaker 4 (01:13:52):
I'm so loved, And it's like I'm in a place
right now where, for the first time in my life,
I feel like the love for myself and the love
people have for me are at the same level and
I've never experienced that before, and it took a long
time for me to learn that I even had the
right to love myself. You know, people say these things like, oh,

(01:14:13):
don't be full of yourself. You better be full of yourself.
You better be full of yourself, because then what are
you full of? You don't want to be hollow, and
you also don't want to be full of everybody else's
validation of you, because who are they?

Speaker 3 (01:14:26):
And baby, they will.

Speaker 4 (01:14:27):
Run away when shit go low and they gone, You're empty.
You better be full of yourself. And I have had
to learn as somebody who had a nervous breakd out
and was brought to the bottom and realize that all
of my confidence was built on other people's thoughts of
me everything, And I had to build myself back up.
And luckily I had a therapist who taught me to

(01:14:49):
do that. And I had to build myself back up.
And so I tell everybody now, like, no, please be
full of yourself and love yourself. And you know, particularly women,
we are not told that we are allowed to name
ourselve else. I am a genius, I'm a gifted performer,
I am a gifted person. I am a creative genius.
I'm generous, i am giving, I am kind, I'm funny,

(01:15:13):
I'm delightful. Like these are not things that I need
to wait for somebody to say about me. I know
these things about myself. Aren't we supposed to be God's children?

Speaker 2 (01:15:22):
Yeah?

Speaker 4 (01:15:23):
And that's not based in religion. That's just based in understanding.
That's how I live as a spiritual person. I believe
I am a child that was made of something other.
I don't know what we were made of, but I
know that I feel like I was made of something supernatural,
and I have a responsibility in that to live at
my best. And people don't want to let you grow.
People don't want to let you evolve. People don't want

(01:15:45):
to let you find better ways to exist. People are
talking to me about from two thousand and five, some
interaction they had with me for thirty seconds in two
thousand and five.

Speaker 3 (01:15:54):
Now you tell me, are you judging people based on
a thirty second interaction?

Speaker 4 (01:15:57):
No, because why you might say we had a bad
thirty second interaction, Right, that's it.

Speaker 2 (01:16:04):
I'm probably don't never see that person again, so I
don't have the.

Speaker 4 (01:16:06):
Same reaction the same week that people are telling in
these articles. I mean, the Seals is so terrible. She
you know, she has boundaries, et cetera. The same week
they talk about Anthony Mackie. Why let that man have
his boundaries. I'm like, I can't call it. I can't
call it, and I've decided to stop trying to call it.
I put the phone down.

Speaker 2 (01:16:28):
The Queen came to your defense, though, yes.

Speaker 4 (01:16:30):
She did, because I'm loved by the people I love
and that is the biggest honor. Queen Latifa Dana Olwens, Okay,
can you.

Speaker 2 (01:16:41):
Help me understand this?

Speaker 3 (01:16:44):
I wasn't ready for that.

Speaker 1 (01:16:46):
Sometimes, and it's happened before, people in our community forget
that they're black and they try to pease a group
of people that's probably never going to embrace them. And
once they realize that, guess who's the first group to
take him back?

Speaker 3 (01:17:01):
We don't.

Speaker 6 (01:17:02):
I don't know her, you dog, I ain't say nobody
name Amanda. You don't even know who I'm talking about?
How you know who I'm talking about? But but but you,
But we've listened, We've seen this happen before. Rest his soul.

Speaker 2 (01:17:18):
O J. Simpson, you know he had the famous quote,
I'm oj i ain't black.

Speaker 1 (01:17:22):
Even Michael Jackson went through what he went through, rest
his soul right, Even Kanye had to be reminded. And
now miss Owens, who's oh, I don't want no black polus.

Speaker 2 (01:17:36):
I don't want this, I don't want that.

Speaker 1 (01:17:39):
And now we can't keep off our black media stations
when before she gave us her butt to kiss. Now,
if I'm lying about figuring out the term people, y'all
correct me. But y'all know I'm telling the truth. Now
you're talking about somebody that's always uplifted this community. And
I was one of the first guys that had had
a viral moment with kat Williams. And they couldn't wait

(01:17:59):
excuse they couldn't wait to attack me. But Candace has
given you all her bloody kids for two decades.

Speaker 2 (01:18:08):
In the moment, why they do it? They can't fire me,
They can't fire me the hell you say? Now, look
at it.

Speaker 3 (01:18:19):
It's not her fault.

Speaker 2 (01:18:21):
Who foult is it? Ah? No, no, no, no, no, no,
that's not let's not take that.

Speaker 3 (01:18:25):
Let her back in, huh the spaces that let her
back in?

Speaker 1 (01:18:27):
Oh? Okay, okay, But that's how we are. We'll see,
we're very forgiving people.

Speaker 3 (01:18:33):
It taught us to be that we do.

Speaker 4 (01:18:36):
Who taught us what? Who taught us that version of forgiveness?
Do I need to do the lesson?

Speaker 3 (01:18:41):
No?

Speaker 2 (01:18:41):
Because I know them.

Speaker 4 (01:18:43):
Slave owners taught us that version of forgiveness. They gave
us a bible called the slave Bible. And this bible
had parts of it taken out. It had the parts
of uprisings taken out. It taught about forgiveness because they
needed to make.

Speaker 1 (01:18:58):
It okay in their mind no matter how bad I
treat you, at some point in time, I need you
to forgive me for the wrongs I've done against you.

Speaker 4 (01:19:06):
Because they had convinced themselves that it was still okay
to keep people enslaved whose souls were saved. Yeah, even
though they knew that that was counterproductive to the teachings
that they had learned. So you know, we are oftentimes
forgiving to our own detriment.

Speaker 2 (01:19:25):
We are.

Speaker 3 (01:19:26):
And listen, here's the thing. You know, what the thing
about forgiveness is is that you should absolutely forgive people
who ask for it, right right, who ask for it.

Speaker 2 (01:19:36):
And I'm okay with that. I'm okay to forgive. I
don't forget.

Speaker 3 (01:19:39):
I just move on.

Speaker 4 (01:19:41):
But redemption requires action. There are resort of justice practices
that have to be implemented in order for atonement to
truly take place. And when that's not the course of action,
it looks like something else.

Speaker 7 (01:19:55):
Right, Yeah, it looks like it looks yucky, It looks
like capitalism, it looks like it looks like click baite,
it looks like naivete, It looks.

Speaker 3 (01:20:07):
Dumb, and it looks insulting to anybody who has a mind.

Speaker 4 (01:20:12):
And ultimately, again I will bring it back to what
makes a black space a black space at this point,
because when I create black spaces Shannon Sharp like smart,
funny and black, like my podcast Small Doses, my radio show,
The Amanda Seel Show, we literally do black heart news.
When I create black spaces, the word black in that

(01:20:32):
context is always about community.

Speaker 3 (01:20:34):
You said it earlier.

Speaker 4 (01:20:35):
So my problem that you've already pointed out is that
I'm thinking, well, when they make a black space, it's
also the same thing. But maybe I mean, but maybe
I got I got kicked out a black space, you know,
I got. I literally got kicked out of a black
space by a black woman who sick Black people on me,
black men on me to remove me. So at this
point I understand that we can't just look at black
people and say, is this skin folk or kinfolk?

Speaker 3 (01:20:57):
We got to look at black spaces. Is this skin folk?

Speaker 4 (01:20:59):
Kim Flo and all of these black media spaces that
took her back, in all these black media spaces that
have just excoriated me for weeks, I look at them
and say, you are simply black by name, because you
are white by commerce.

Speaker 2 (01:21:14):
Wow. When I saw people taking shots to Angel Reese
for crying to come.

Speaker 3 (01:21:22):
For the longest time, you know, she is a young person.
Do you know how disgusting that is?

Speaker 4 (01:21:26):
And that foreignball nigga who loves to make himself look
like he's the white people's savior.

Speaker 2 (01:21:31):
Who's it?

Speaker 4 (01:21:33):
Man? You will icho a lorn Oh lord, come talk
to me, white people. I'm the black guy that that's nice.

Speaker 3 (01:21:42):
Cut it out. It's ridiculous, man, I know these people.

Speaker 2 (01:21:45):
Man, I'm gonna have to help.

Speaker 4 (01:21:46):
Well, you're not saying it, I am. You're not saying it,
and you don't. You don't, and I will let you
off the hook.

Speaker 3 (01:21:51):
You don't need to respond, don't feel like you need
to defend them, but baby.

Speaker 4 (01:21:56):
You can.

Speaker 2 (01:21:57):
I let you have your space. This is your safe
space to say your peace.

Speaker 3 (01:22:01):
Can I have a hug?

Speaker 2 (01:22:05):
No, you wouldn't give me no hug, or I try
to get it. I tried to get a DA I
have to get to a hug.

Speaker 3 (01:22:10):
And now I'm there. You have a hug.

Speaker 2 (01:22:11):
Yes, you can have a hug. Thank you chead.

Speaker 1 (01:22:22):
Dang that was that was that was quick? I feel
I feel I feel good good, I feel good. You
hosted the b ET Award in twenty twenty.

Speaker 2 (01:22:36):
In my house and ain't been back.

Speaker 3 (01:22:40):
She ain't let me tell you. Can nobody say you
don't put it together. That's why you were so successful
on the seat.

Speaker 2 (01:22:47):
Ain't nobody told you why you ain't been You can't
hold no more.

Speaker 3 (01:22:50):
You can The internet told me that I haven't been
back because I'm not like a baby. I hosted the
awards in my house. Yes I'm not saying that lightly.

Speaker 4 (01:23:02):
COVID what was happening and the stylists their assistant tested positive.
Ends up being a false positive, but it tests positive.
And two days before I had to host the be
TA Words at my house. Wow, I find this out now.
At the time, somebody I had been seeing on and off.
We were gonna try to see if we get along again.

Speaker 2 (01:23:23):
So you will let him come. He will stay for
it to stand a period of time because cold.

Speaker 4 (01:23:26):
So he was already he was coming to the house, okay,
And we're literally sitting next to each other when I
get this call from Jesse Collins. Shout out to Jesse
Collins and Dion Harmon. These are two people that are
two of the most beautiful human beings on the earth.
And Jesse Collins helped break the code for me about me.
Jesse Collins, without calling me autistic, knew I was before
I knew I was. And he literally told the staff

(01:23:49):
this is how Amanda works. She needs information. That's what
she needs of it. She just needs the information. And
when she has the information, she's fine. So let's just
give her that. It doesn't take anything away from us.
But some people feel like giving information is like some
power struggle type shit. But he tells me this, Shannon,
So this man body James is at my house and

(01:24:13):
he's like, I don't do physical labor. I'm like, lord child,
So I get him a check. I get him a
check to do the show, to put up, to put
this thing together. One thing I'll never take from that
man is he put that he did hook up them wires?

Speaker 3 (01:24:30):
Okay, but now I can't have a.

Speaker 4 (01:24:35):
Stylist, a hairstylist, or a makeup artist here, so I
end up having to do my own makeup with my
makeup artists on my phone, my hair with my hairstylist
on like they're all on FaceTime telling me what to do.
I did thirteen costume changes in my house while this
man sat in my backyard on FaceTime telling people, Yeah,

(01:24:56):
I saved the bat Awards and I got him a
credit because that's the type of nigga I am. I
got him a credit and I got him his checked.
Now if he I'm not even let me stop. But
but you see how I'm protecting people that don't Yeah, yeah, yeah,
I was about to do that because he's the type.

Speaker 3 (01:25:10):
Of person that would take things to another level. He
tried to extore me once.

Speaker 2 (01:25:16):
You've been having a rough goal with.

Speaker 4 (01:25:18):
Me, I know, because I didn't have a father that
really taught me what to do, and because I present
to people in a way that they deem masculine, but
it's really just passion, And if they really were smart,
they would understand that the passion that I speak with
is the passion that I with, So I don't understand
why they can't do that math.

Speaker 2 (01:25:36):
Yes, sports, I was reading that. I read that. I
read that, you know about a nickel defense. Isn't football?

Speaker 3 (01:25:47):
I don't even remember anymore. Don't put me on the spot,
But I really you.

Speaker 2 (01:25:51):
Love sports, huh? Or you love football or you loved me.

Speaker 6 (01:25:56):
No.

Speaker 4 (01:25:57):
I appreciate sports the sports that I I mean, like
I It wouldn't be fair to say I love football
because it's not even close to my love for gymnastics.
You know, I respect football, I respect basketball. I mean,
I'm I got a j you know. I used to
have handles in my younger days. Now I have bad problems.

Speaker 1 (01:26:17):
But well, that what you what you were saying about earlier,
that that's the kind of same thing that you were
able to do with back.

Speaker 2 (01:26:22):
Probably you ain't gonna be to do that no more. Man,
So I think you have to sit there one now.

Speaker 3 (01:26:27):
I think it's all about creativity.

Speaker 2 (01:26:31):
I'm sorry I brought that up.

Speaker 4 (01:26:33):
You're talking to a comic, like whatever you say, I
got something in the chamber. You know, that's the other part.
I'm a really good mother comic. Did you know that
I did know that.

Speaker 3 (01:26:43):
I didn't know that. I didn't know that. Okay, well,
can I have my special? You know I have my special?
I'll be knowing. But this year is when I really realized, like, nigga,
you nice with this. I've been going on stage and
I don't even prepare no more.

Speaker 4 (01:26:58):
I just go to see right, baby, I'm killing you
like that though, I'm really well, how about this here.

Speaker 1 (01:27:08):
Now?

Speaker 3 (01:27:08):
Not to say not to say I haven't had my l's.

Speaker 4 (01:27:10):
Yeah, there was a particular room in Los Angeles that
I did take an L but I have a different
style of comedy than that room was expected.

Speaker 2 (01:27:16):
Right dating in twenty twenty four, I am single.

Speaker 3 (01:27:25):
You ain't trying you aint who's hollering at me? Shannon?
Who's who is hollering at me?

Speaker 2 (01:27:29):
Who let me ask you this? How about this here
at this point?

Speaker 1 (01:27:33):
What type of man? What type of man would interest Amanda?
Does he have to be scholarly?

Speaker 4 (01:27:40):
Uh?

Speaker 2 (01:27:40):
Funny? I mean women like funny? So but that needs
to be one women like funny.

Speaker 4 (01:27:45):
He has to have character, character, And when I say character,
I mean he has to have a very strong value system. Okay,
he has to care about humanity, Okay, he has to
like animals.

Speaker 3 (01:27:54):
Okay, he has to like music. Okay, he has to
be curious. He doesn't have to be scholarly, but he
has to be curious.

Speaker 4 (01:28:04):
And and the thing about curiosity is it's not just
about like education, but you have to be able to
be curious about somebody else's feelings, you know. Like that's
the thing I feel like I run into with a
lot of men like they not curious about like if
I say I'm sad or if I'm say I'm annoyed,
like they go into defense.

Speaker 3 (01:28:20):
But really the next question should be why why? And
then there's a conversation.

Speaker 4 (01:28:26):
And I learned in my last relationship, I really really
worked on my toxic traits, you know, because we're all
working to undo the things that shaped us that we
had no control over.

Speaker 3 (01:28:35):
I was, yeah, we all are anymore. You definitely have
toxic trading.

Speaker 2 (01:28:42):
Whoa whoa? Man? Is that about me? Okay? Thank you?

Speaker 3 (01:28:46):
This man said I need to every morning. I'm woa
whoa whoa who say that to Sinko. You didn't say
that to Olrtinco. You didn't say that to Thinko. I said,
I don't know if you've got to shifted.

Speaker 4 (01:28:58):
It what it is because the way you framed it,
I'm gonna just say that, I'm gonna just say I'm gonna.

Speaker 3 (01:29:06):
Just say, Shane shape. The way you had said it
was like, whether she likes it or not, this.

Speaker 4 (01:29:11):
Is my expectation and sometime to pussy ain't prime until
prime time, and it's just like, damn, is that what
the expectation is every morning?

Speaker 2 (01:29:20):
I mean, sometimes my pockets ain't prime, but she expect that.

Speaker 3 (01:29:23):
Burke, I can't speak to that. Sounds like an escort process.
I'm just saying, you know, sometimes that's gotta situation.

Speaker 2 (01:29:35):
How about this, so you mean to till ain't no manner?
I know they sliding in your DM.

Speaker 3 (01:29:38):
They're not.

Speaker 2 (01:29:39):
Ain't no man in your dem No have a bit.

Speaker 4 (01:29:42):
There was one person in my DMS, but they're not
really like into me. They're just like talking about professional
stuff whatever.

Speaker 2 (01:29:48):
Ain't nobody sliding the d IM talking.

Speaker 3 (01:29:49):
I don't know if he has a girl, I'll ask you.

Speaker 2 (01:29:52):
They sliding your deal.

Speaker 4 (01:29:54):
Camera lord, nothing outside of my d's because they're like,
she's too intense, right, And that's the thing. I feel
like a lot of men holler at me because they
want to tame me like they like it's like a
game for them, and the like I had a dude
I was talking to who was like, yeah, you know,
I like you because you're a challenge, don't.

Speaker 3 (01:30:16):
I don't want to do none of that. I don't
want discourse. I want intercourse, like please, I want to
be home.

Speaker 4 (01:30:23):
On the couch, hug the boot up. That's really what
I don't want to fight. People be like a man
that seals in her tone. I'm talking to a phone. Baby,
I'm talking to a phone.

Speaker 3 (01:30:32):
I'm not talking to you. I'm talking to a phone.
And if I say these idiots and you take offense
to that, well that's your fault.

Speaker 1 (01:30:42):
Okay, Kevin, correct men if I'm wrong with a lot
of players. Okay, you don't want kids, but you had
your eggs rolled and correct?

Speaker 2 (01:30:49):
Yeah, because everyone maybe down the road. You mean the
right guy, me, the right guy.

Speaker 3 (01:30:54):
No, I don't I don't.

Speaker 2 (01:30:55):
Want right hold on, hold on, you got to be willing.

Speaker 3 (01:30:58):
To compromise I with my uterus.

Speaker 2 (01:31:02):
Okay, you can have a what they called sarrogate.

Speaker 3 (01:31:05):
I don't want to have kids, babe.

Speaker 2 (01:31:07):
Man say babe, you know, baby, who gonna take he
gonna say, babe, who gonn take care of us when
we get old?

Speaker 3 (01:31:12):
Well, that's a really scary Uh. Have you seen people
in these nursing homes. My mama worked in a nursing home.

Speaker 2 (01:31:17):
That's what I'm saying. That's what the kids are.

Speaker 3 (01:31:19):
They not the kids is visiting them in the nursing home.

Speaker 2 (01:31:22):
Nah, I'm staying my kids better put me up in
the crib exactly I bought them for.

Speaker 3 (01:31:27):
That's not the case. You know what you're better off having,
You're better off, you.

Speaker 4 (01:31:32):
Know, listen, if you if you're getting if you're having
kids so they can take care of you. I think
that's unfair.

Speaker 2 (01:31:37):
No, I don't think you I don't think you know.
But that's that's the.

Speaker 4 (01:31:39):
Thought process for a lot of people, right, Like, and
I think it's unfair because it gives them a job.

Speaker 3 (01:31:43):
I have beautiful friends and I and I and I.

Speaker 4 (01:31:45):
Don't consider age to be the only reason for be Like,
I have friends that are in their thirties, right, that
are in their twenties, Like, it's really about where your
heart is at, right, And.

Speaker 3 (01:31:55):
I will be fine. I will be fine.

Speaker 4 (01:31:58):
I will be taking care of and I will be
supported because I support people, and you get what you give.
Unless it's black media, you would I froze the eggs
because people force you. People really be on your head,
like just in case, j I see just in case,
Just in case, yeah, j I s.

Speaker 3 (01:32:15):
But let me tell you that.

Speaker 4 (01:32:16):
Egg freezing process is a motherfucker. You're getting that shit
rammed up with you every day, and they looking around.
If there was sixteen yesterday, now there's only ten, and
you're like, God damn eggs, God damn listen.

Speaker 3 (01:32:27):
To my small doses episode side effects of IVY.

Speaker 2 (01:32:31):
I mean, hens are gonna want to say, lay so
many eggs?

Speaker 6 (01:32:33):
I mean how many things you say you're gonna get
that you'll ever go to me ahead again?

Speaker 2 (01:32:38):
You know you get thirty eggs for a day for
two months, sir.

Speaker 4 (01:32:43):
I don't know, To be honest, I know the things
I know, and I know the things I don't know,
and I really didn't.

Speaker 1 (01:32:46):
You didn't know at the time that it was I
just did you. Did somebody tell you it's gonna be painful?
I mean, what's not painful?

Speaker 2 (01:32:51):
It's just it's just it's just different.

Speaker 3 (01:32:54):
Yeah, Like it's just so invasive. Yeah, it's so invasive.
It's so invasive.

Speaker 4 (01:32:58):
Like I like today my podcast episode about the sexual
assault I experience comes out today on small doses, and
it's like it's a similar type of like it's invasive,
feel invaded, right, and you're like, this is very medical,
but it still feels yucky.

Speaker 1 (01:33:16):
Is there anything you like to promote your podcast, your book?
You gotta movie, You're right in a movie.

Speaker 3 (01:33:21):
I'm on tour. I'm on tour, the Unlikable Tour.

Speaker 4 (01:33:29):
Yes, come out see me. I'll be telling jokes. I
feel like my shows at this point are like Ted
Talks that you laugh at. But I'm hitting the road.
I'm very excited to be back on stage. I was
blacklisted all last year. We'll do that in part two.
And you know, it's just it's great to get out
in the world after you be on this internet and
they beat you up and you go in the world

(01:33:50):
and folks is like, oh man, we appreciate you, we
love you, and just making people laugh is such a superpower.
So come on out to the A Likable Tour. Go
to a manasales dot com to get your tickets. You
can also listen to my radio show, The Amanda Seals Show,
every day you can go to wherever you get your
podcasts and check that out if you're not in a
city that we're on. And Small Doses is my podcast

(01:34:12):
that we've been doing for six years. Will you do
will you do an episode of Small Doses?

Speaker 2 (01:34:15):
Yeah? You have to get my people. Yeah, I'm sure
I could do.

Speaker 3 (01:34:18):
That for you your people?

Speaker 2 (01:34:20):
Yea.

Speaker 3 (01:34:21):
Do you have to get approval?

Speaker 1 (01:34:23):
I I don't have to get approval, but I have
a busy schedule. I'm shooting like eight ten times a week.

Speaker 3 (01:34:27):
So he said, I'm a busy man. I'm a busy man.

Speaker 4 (01:34:30):
I will commit by heart, but not by date. I'll
take that as a yes, we got time because I'm
not going to die till I'm mady. But I'm in
the process of writing my next book on Simon and Schuster,
so very excited about that. But my previous book, Small Doses,
is also available wherever you get your books and audio

(01:34:52):
books and otherwise. You know, I appreciate this platform. The
space you've created here is very unique and necessary.

Speaker 2 (01:35:02):
Thank you.

Speaker 4 (01:35:06):
You know you had asked me earlier, like what has
come out of these last four weeks? And let me
tell you something, Shannon. I am a pure soul. I've
always been a pure soul. I always moved from pure intentions,
and I've reached a point where I'm just no longer
going to argue what people think with.

Speaker 2 (01:35:29):
What I know. Amanda, see us, ladies, gentlemen.

Speaker 5 (01:35:35):
All my life, grinding all my life, sacrifics, hustle price.
I want to slice all my life, grinding all my life. Yeah,
all my life, grinding all.

Speaker 3 (01:35:47):
My life, sacrifics, hustle the price. I want to slice
all my life, grinding all my life,

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Episode Transcript

Host

Shannon Sharpe

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