September 8, 2022 • 37 mins
This week, Eva is diving back into the world of spirituality and inner connection with one of the most renowned thought leaders of our time – Toltec spiritualist and bestselling author, Don Miguel Ruiz. Eva and Don Miguel explore self-love, self-awareness, and reality – and what we can learn about these pillars of inner connection from ancient Toltec wisdom and Don Miguel’s celebrated work, The Four Agreements.
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Speaker 1 (00:01):
Hello, everyone, Welcome back to Connections with Eva Longoria. I'm Longoria,
and in this podcast, I am exploring our connections to everything.
One topic I can keep coming back to again and again,
probably because it's the most important, is the connection with
ourselves and the connection to our inner spirit and our
(00:22):
connection to our purpose in this life, in this world,
on this planet. I've been exploring this question for most
of my life, and I am well read about it.
I love reading. I just love reading. I don't read fiction.
I only read nonfiction, and that's how I stumbled upon
the amazing book of the Four Agreements by Don Mee Ruis.
(00:46):
Part of it affirmed how I lived my life already,
like I actually never take things personal, and people like
you never take anything personal, Like I just don't. What
is the point And I don't make assumptions in my life.
When I met my husband, I said, are we boyfriend girlfriend?
Because I'm not assuming I'm your girlfriend? You know. He
was like, he was like, oh okay. Like I was like,
(01:07):
you've have to clarify this. So it affirmed the way
I was living and then also taught me some new things,
you know about being impeccable with my word and just
how words can create emotional poison, and just exploring this
idea of like why we're here and how you can
better connect to yourselves. I've had some amazing people on
the podcast already talking about spirituality, love and extending the
(01:30):
truth of who we are, and so I have a
lot of questions for our guests. I'm so excited to
have spiritual teacher Don Migu Luise with me today. You've
heard me mention him in so many episodes. I referenced
Don Miguel so many times in my life and in
this podcast. He's the best selling author who shares wisdom
from toldtech spirituality in his books of course, including The
(01:51):
Four Agreements, The Mastery of Self, the Fifth Agreement, and
Beyond Fear. So I want to welcome to the show,
Don Miguel, thank you for joining us. Well, it's a
great pleasure for me to be with your cares. You know,
I just feel so so happy every single moment. Yes,
(02:11):
it's wonderful. Oh, I'm so happy to talk to you
and I haven't seen you in years. And I will
say I met Don Miguel when I was going through
a tough time. I was going through divorce, and he
really guided me through that process in that moment. And
I always felt like, sometimes we seek help in crisis,
right like I'm going through divorce, I am, you know,
(02:33):
going through something at work, I'm going through a career change.
And I think what I love about your teachings, Don
Miguel is that they're not for only crisis mode. They're
actually for like, this is how you should live day
to day. And I find that really refreshing. That's the
way I live my life. You know, I lived my
life like this is the last day of my life.
(02:57):
But I plan that I would live for affair. Yeah,
only this moment really exists. And all the planet we
createm with the world that we call hope, I hope
that we will work, etcetera, etcetera. And we should remember
(03:17):
that Cope, it's the last demon who escaped from Pandora
bas Well. It is really a demon, you know, It's
like a carrod that a donkey is following and never
reach it. Uh huh. But if we have that awareness,
(03:38):
we can use hope in order to plan without expecting
that I will work or not work. But that guide
us at a certain direction, and it's complimentary to faith.
You don't. Faith is believe in something a hundred without
a doubt. That is faith. Faith is life working right
(04:05):
here and right now. Is the force that most matter,
is what we used to create the dream, the reality
in the one we are living, and it's right here
and right now. Then with faith we can enjoy every
single moment. Everything will depends where we focus our faith.
(04:31):
Then the right direction to focus our faith is in ourselves.
Like I have faith in me mm hmm, that I
know that I'm alive in this moment. I don't know
if that Tony I will be are not alive or tomorrow,
it doesn't matter. But right now I enjoy what I
(04:55):
am doing, and right now I just speaking to you
and with everybody who is listening to us. That gave
me so much pleasure. Mhmm. You know, in certain points
would not be that important to be right or wrong
or good or but no, is just the creation of
(05:19):
the masterpiece of life, of the art that we create,
which is the story of our life, the one. As
you know, we are the main character and everybody else
is just a secondary character. Because for me, the story
of my life is real, is what I live in
and I know that is the same for everybody around me.
(05:42):
They live in their own story, and in their story,
I'm just a secondary character. That's why it's a waste
of time taking anything personally, because whatever they think about
me or they say about me, is really talking about
the second very character who live in their story, not
(06:03):
in mind. M hm, m hmm. Then to be aware
is the most important thing of life. We can say,
to be aware of what we are living, doing, etcetera, etcetera,
because that gives us so much peace and of course
is the greatest expression of love mhm. And we find
(06:26):
out that what is the biggest problem is that distortion
of love. It means the way we learn to love,
because we learn to love the same way that our
parents love or friend's love, society loves. And this is
with conditionous yes, conditional love. I love you if you
(06:51):
let me control you. Yeah, But you love me if
I let you control me. And this is how you
us love to each other with control, when we understand
every single conflict that exists in humaney, Yeah, we understand
over the violence, war, everything, because this is the main problem.
(07:16):
We love with contitions, which is exactly the opposite of love.
Right the first time I heard of total Technoledge was
your book. And you know you were born into a
Toltec family of healers, and you were raised in and
rule Mexico by a healer and your father was a
(07:38):
shaman at your your grandfather. So it feels like wow,
what a way to grow up. First of all, but
did you feel pressure to go into this family business?
You took a different path for a while. But I
just want to know, like how did you arrive to
this knowledge? And then I want to talk a little
(07:58):
bit about Toltec culture and history. You know, you were
around these ideas of spirituality growing up. How did that
shape you as a human. Well, the way that my
parents said, okay, is by having faith in myself. They
always tell me, whatever you want to do, if you
really want to do it, it's gonna happen. They tell
(08:19):
me since I was a child that I'm dreaming all
the time, that everything is a dream. And I find
out that he is. It is true, that is a dream.
We are dreaming right now, we're dreaming now here. Of
course when are we awake, Yeah, then what we see
is just a reflection of what is real. And to
(08:39):
prove that is so easy. Just closualize and everything disappear
mhm d. Open the eyes and everything appear again, which
means that we are seeing the reflection of what is real.
It's like you're inside of a mirror and everything we
see is just a reflection. Then as we are dreaming
(09:01):
and we have the awareness that they're dreaming, and then
we have the awareness that everybody is doing exactly the
same thing. They live their life dreaming and they don't
know they are dreaming. You know, when the brain is sleeping,
the dream shift and change all the time. Then when
we are not focusing something, we have the tendency of
(09:23):
day dream. Just like when gary sleeping, you'll go back
until certain activities that happened in the past, or you
even can't go to the future and dream certain activities
that maybe may happen mhmm. But when something hooked your
attention to right here and right now, that someone can
(09:44):
tell you what you've been well, we are dreaming, and
he scarre dreaming all the time, and it's so beautiful
when you really understand that and you find out that yes,
you are the producer, that there actor of the dream
of your own dream. So if we're dreaming right now
(10:06):
when do we wait? Well, awareness lead us to that point. First,
to be aware that yes, this is a dream, it
looks so real, and in fact, in the dream, merging
with the rest of the dreamers is real because you're
real that we have Olympic Games, is real, that we
(10:27):
have elections and all of that. But everyone have a
completely different point of view of whatever event that is happening.
And the point of view they have is depending how
they're dreaming the daily life. It will depend of the
whole belief system that they have, because this is how
(10:48):
they're gonna judge what they're perceiving. That's how they're gonna
justify whatever event that is happening. So, I mean, the
goal of us being here, which from what I gather
is is to awaken, like, don't be in this autopilot
of a dream, but to get to a point in
life where we are aware and awakened by our purpose
(11:12):
and our reason for being here, which, by the way
you've said it, Manytimes, is to love. It's to love.
And I love that you say that about the body
and the physicality, because I you know, I've heard Echertole
and I've talked to Ja shetty and deep October, and
I feel like the common denominator everybody has is that
this particular world is a gift. It's a gift to
(11:34):
us physically feeling and showing love. And I just love that.
Dr Brian Weiss says the same thing. You know, there's
all these experts in different fields saying the same thing.
Of like, the main purpose of humanity is to love,
and this physical body is um the way we can
(11:55):
experience that. Yes, I can say without about that I
am an incarnation of love. But every single human is
an incarnation of love because it's the only thing that
is real, you know, as the incarnation of love, we
(12:21):
fall of grace, if we can say that word, when
we fall into the contious love and we kind of
forget that we are love is the greatest temptation, falling
into contitionsal love, because we become like everybody else. We
(12:42):
are dreaming like everybody else. To be aware of that,
to find out that yes, you are love, your incarnation
of love, everything will change completely because you're not expected
that someone love you. You don't need love, you don't
need to be loved because you are loved, and that
(13:06):
makes the whole difference in life. Being loved is just
enjoy life itself because life itself is also loved. Yeah, yes,
I love that. I find the history of pro technology
(13:29):
very beautiful and fascinating. But first of all, who are
the toll text people? They preceded the Aztecs. We have
to understand that toltech is a word. And now what
is a word in the translation in English is artists?
(13:49):
Then adulte is an artist is not exactly people who
live in Mechical long time ago. No, Toltec is any
human who live in the planet Earth. It doesn't matter
what languages speak, where geographically live could be in Australia, Japan, Africa,
(14:11):
doesn't matter. Every single human is an artist. Every single
human is a toltec and they're creating all the time,
even if they don't do anything, they're creating. Tot tech
knowledge is the knowledge of an artist. And this is everywhere,
(14:33):
is in anyone. It's just the language that is different,
because let's see, in English is artists, in the Spanish
is artista, and in every language have their own way
to say toltec. Toltec is only the nagata a word
for it, right, Yeah, you talked a lot about in
(14:56):
your book of a Concepts, and I remember you talking
about the concept of marriage and how when divorce happens,
it's because we both don't have the same concept of
what marriage should look like or be like, and so
my conditions are different than your conditions. So I will
love you to the end of time, if you don't
cheat on me, if you don't betray me, if you
(15:20):
buy me things. And then his idea of love is
I will love you if you serve me, if you
provide for me, if you like in a marriage. There's
so many conditions. But then we have unconditional love with
our children. There is nothing my son could do that
would make me stop loving him exactly, and that unconditional
(15:45):
love is always around us, but we only focused into
conditional love. That's why we're all the time, and that's
why we are so afraid to be Josh. That's why
we do what society want us to do, try to
please other people's point of view. That's why we pretend
(16:06):
to be what we are not. And we know that
we are not authentic because we learned to be that way,
because everybody is in that way. M M. Then authenticity
is something that we need to look for and the
(16:26):
only way is to un learn what you really know. Right,
take an emotional inventory, yes, exactly of the agreements you
did not agree to. In order to be what you
really are, you have to find out what you are
not taking away everything that you're not. The only thing
(16:50):
that reminds is what you really are. M hmm. And
when you discover more and more what you really are,
you can help. But you just fall in love with
your self and you find out that you are the
love of your life. You are the priority because you
find out that without your physical body, you cannot interact
(17:13):
with anybody. You can give or receive love, you can
share your creation and you cannot perceive anybody else's creation.
And this stands to our physical body. Then when we
understand that point and we are said or body just
(17:34):
the way, it is just like magic, everything change. You
start looking at yourself with a little smile and you
love what you see. It doesn't matter how you look like,
because well, any way you look like you're beautiful. The
(17:56):
problem is that they teach us what they believed beauty is,
and we try to be what we are. Not if
we try to be with somebody else, if we kept
out be anybody else, like nobody else can be me? Yeah,
how do you think we should balance unconditional love to
(18:20):
each other as human beings and still hold your place
of being respected or being valued or you know, I
feel like you know, all the memes and all the
self help is about leaning in and you deserve more
and you deserve better and self worth and self value
and like stand your ground and hold your space. And
(18:43):
sometimes it feels contradictory to unconditional love to all And
you've given examples of it in some of your books
about the abused wife, right, like don't take it personal?
You're like, how can I not take it personal? He's
beating me up? And you you give a really good
example of how that has nothing to do with you,
but you do have the choice to leave. Right, talk
(19:07):
a little bit more about that, of like how you
can have faith in ourselves and belief in yourself and
unconditional love for others but still protect your you're being well,
this is very simple and it's very easy to understand.
And everything is about the way you loved yourself. It's
(19:27):
how you love yourself. Because let's see, if you have
a pet and somebody comes and mistreat your pet. You
will get angry right away and you will defend your pet.
You will not allow that anybody going hurt your dog
or your cat or whatever your pet is. Then how
(19:50):
come we allow other people that come and hurt or
physical body physically or verbally? How can we gonna allow
that anybody come and abuse or party if we don't
do anything? And many times we feel yes, I deserve that.
(20:12):
And as you can see, is a level how much
we love ourselves. Because when you love and respect yourself,
you will never allowed that anybody will come and mistreat you.
It is someone abuse you a little more that the
way you love yourself as the moment that you live,
(20:37):
you don't stay there. Mm hmm. This is extremely important
to understand. And if someone disrespects you, maybe first time
you say okay, yes stop there, Never do that to
me again, never, because you love yourself so much exactly
so it comes from loving yourself unconditionally first and are
(21:00):
most mm hmm. You do it one time, okay, I
would allow that, don't do it again. To do it twice,
that's it is over. Go ab you somebody else, someone
who who let you abuse that person, but not here
the only reason for you to be here is to
(21:24):
protect your physical body. This is the reason. That's the
only reason we're here, to keep your physical body alive,
to allow your physical body to joy. You know, your
physical body has been loyal to you all the time. Yes,
you the one who are not loyal to your physical Yeah, okay, Yeah,
(21:51):
and you you have a different perspective on what you're
gonna allow and not allow. Yeah, if you really love yourself. Yeah.
You always talk a lot about living your life with authenticity.
You know. I hear that word a lot, like be
your authentic self, and I think, you know, talk about
(22:13):
loving yourself and having faith in yourself. That's a beautiful idea.
But but what do you mean by live authentically? See,
we're children. We learned to act. As soon as we
dominate the language that we speak. We start acting just
to be a prooved but whoever is around us to
(22:37):
be good for other people. Then, when we are acting
in the beginning, we act, and we are we are.
But when we start having the influence not just from
our parents, but the school and everybody around, they tell
us what we are. We try to please everybody and
(22:59):
we create our own identity with that identity. We try
to be accepted wherever we are, by our parents, by
the teachers, but the friends, but a little society, and
we're acting in order to be accepted, but we don't
know that we're acting. And with experience or acting becomes
(23:23):
stronger and more powerful, and we master to be an
actor or actress even if we're not professional. We're really
good at it, even if you don't do it for
a living. Yeah, let's see if by for example, a
child tends eleven years old, unless they make a tantrum
(23:46):
and people react to that tantrum. Then if they see
that that tantrum works, everything will the tantrum will be
stronger because in practice and practice more and more that
tant in People will react to those stantons. But we
know that it's just an acting. But also I think
(24:09):
a lot of people act in life. They're putting on
what they should be because of society and social constructs
and acceptable norms of who and what we should be.
That we act so much we believe it, yes, exactly,
and then we don't remember who we really were because
we've been this fake person for so long and we
(24:34):
know we know we are fake, and that in turn
creates conflict within ourselves. Yeah, this is how we are
losing authenticity little by little. Untilticity is way behind and
the only way to recover is by change. Are acting
(24:57):
all around. We don't even know how we start acting.
But the way we at at home it is different
that the way we act at school, That the way
we act with friends, That the way we act in
that job or in any circumstance, we were at different
mask And this is how we project ourselves, is the
(25:21):
way we wish to be perceived by other people. M
but which are more and more authentic in certain points.
You don't care anymore about what people think about you.
That happens with age, right, Like I don't care anymore,
but exactly, I don't know what you think of me.
But when you're younger, you care so deeply. And it's
(25:44):
like I always say, oh, I wish I had my
twenty year old body with my fifty year old mind.
You know exactly, because now we have that experience in
the Mastery of Love. You talk a lot about this
about the image of perfection and how we're trying to people,
but whose image? Who image of perfection? Societies, God, religion,
your spouses, image of whatever perfect like your friends, Like
(26:09):
it really is a war own. Yeah, yeah, it's your
own because you judge yourself because the biggest Josh and
more semperit Josh, because yourself. And this is how we
also josh other people. But yes, we really are so
so hard with ourselves because we are not the way
(26:30):
we should be accorded that idea of perfection. Mhm. We
just don't know that we are perfect just the way
we are. Like everybody is perfect the way they are,
but in their minds they're not perfect. They always want
certain changes. We always josh or a physical body or yeah,
(26:53):
oh yeah. But do you think that's why we hunt
for love in others Because we lack that love for
ourselves and so we try to capture it in someone else. Well,
we forget that we are love. We are love, not loved.
We are love our love. Yeah yeah, but then we
(27:14):
need the attention. We think that we need someone who
love us, and we sacrifice ourselves. Is someone give us
that attention? You know, like the Masters of Love. I
tell the story about the men and the pizza. Always
(27:36):
tell that story. Yes, yes, imagine that you have a
magical kitchen that you great any kind of food you
want to not just for yourself, but for anyone whoever
came to you. You give that food, they are so
happy and you don't need any kind of food at all.
(27:59):
Then you see us. I want to knock at your
door and bring a pizza and tell you you know what,
these pizza can beat yours. If you do whatever I
want you to do. You will laugh and said, what,
I have a magical kitchen. I have pizza much better
than the way you offer me. Why should I please
(28:22):
you for a pizza? But in the other hand, it's
just starting and someone knock at your door and say,
you can have this pizza if you just do whatever
I want you to do. They say, okay, give me
the pizza, and I do whatever. They say. If you're
(28:44):
good tomorrow, I bring another pizza. Then we sell ourselves
for a pizza. Mm hmm. If you change because of
the pizza. With love, we are love. We have the
magical kitchen. We had love for everything, not just for ourselves.
(29:04):
We create love to feed the entire universe. Yeah, you
you have this great way of transforming complex human issues
into simple common sense. And they like in all of
the the mastery of self and mastery of Love, and
of course the four agreements in the fifth Agreement. But
one thing that I learned from you was being impeccable
with my word. And I'm not It's not like I'm
(29:26):
I'm a liar. It's not that you really stepped it
out in a bigger way. It's like somebody said the
other day about ego. I always thought somebody who had
an ego was like arrogant, and like for me, the
definition was somebody who showed off their money or did
this or that. And so I was like, well, I
don't have an ego, but no ego is in many
(29:47):
forms right. And the same thing with being impeccable with
your word, I said, of course I'm impeccable with mord.
I say what I mean, and I mean what I say.
And but there were all these nuances that you talked
about in creating emotional poison, like just being where of
what's coming out of your mouth. And I feel like
in this era of over communication with social media and
(30:09):
the Internet, of course we are as a society, we're
so much less careful with our word. We are so
much less impeccable with our word. There's fake news there's
people tweeting false information, and so I think we are
in a society that is bombarding us with emotional poison.
(30:30):
How do we navigate that today? The answer is the
fifth agreement, be skeptical, but learned to listen, which means
don't believe me, don't believe anybody else, and don't believe yourself.
(30:54):
But listen, listen what I say, listening about other people say,
and listen to yourself what you say, and use the
power of the doubt in order to see if what
they say is true or is not true. And of
(31:18):
course don't take it personally because they have the right
to lie to and especially when they don't know their lying,
don't believe them. But listen because and what they saying
there's part of truth that can be used by you
mm hmm. Then if it's very offensive or whatever, you
(31:41):
don't need to be there. You don't need to hear
people talking about all those slices or whatever. And you know,
with these media, so it's just like you said, there's
a lot of people sending voice on all around. Well,
there's something that personally you cannot control, but you can
step aside because you're not part of that society. Really,
(32:06):
something is important to understand is that before you was born,
society already exists with all the injustice or the violence
of the poverty. It exists without you. That you are
not responsible for what is happening in society, not at all.
(32:33):
Society graph you put inside of you all those beliefs
and make you believe that you are responsible. Well, you're not.
Whatever you do is because you want to share. You
what to give is your art and you do it
because you want to do it. That because you have
(32:55):
to do it. Mhm, Like is your case. See you
had that beautiful voice, that's what you share. You're a
great actress, that's what you share. Mhmm. You don't need
to go and do something that you're not an expert,
that you don't want to do, because there many other
(33:16):
people that are respect to do that and that there
there was a will to those things. Because you don't
need to go and save the wealth or or save
the silvers or safety atmosphere or whatever. No, you don't
watch at the best. You go shares your voice. Everybody
sing with you. So you're acting or you name it,
(33:38):
and that makes you feel good. Here's you're saying. You
do you do? You me, you exactly because you know
that was my next question. What you just answered was like,
how can a deeper connection with yourself change the world?
You know? And so that seems like I always you know,
I do a lot of philanthropy, and people go, my god,
(34:00):
the world's problems are so big. How could I possibly
make a dent in the environment or in this and that?
And I said, you don't have to. You don't have
to solve the world's problems. But you can change your household.
You can change your relationship with your family, with your spouse,
with your children, Like I do think changing your connection
(34:21):
with yourself changes all of the actions and the domino
effects that that has in the world. You know, it
will eventually affect that change, don't you think? Yeah? You
know in all of my lectures, of most of the lectures,
when I just directly to the people, I asked it
please help me to change the world. And I don't
(34:46):
refer to society of humanity, No, I talk about the
only word that you can change, which be your world,
your own creation. If you change your world as magic,
you would change what is around here, the relationship that
(35:08):
you have which you're below with with your children and
your partners, with your friends. And this is because you
change your world. And by the way, yes, it's the
only world that you can change, and you make it
better as you create your personal heaven. It doesn't matter
if the result of the people live in health, it's
(35:31):
a help that you didn't create. But the hope that
they have is your heaven. Because if you are that love,
people love to be around here. Just smile and people
love to be around here. You don't need to go
and look for anything, just be you. Mm hmmm yeah. Um.
(35:55):
I ask everybody this on the podcast, but what is
the book you think everybody must read? It could be
one of yours, But but I always find uh, I
get so many good book recommendations of you know, somebody's
like this book changed my life, And is there a
book you think every human being must read? Well? When
(36:16):
I was at teenager, I read Damnian The Herman Hess,
and later I read The Stephen Wolf also Hermand Hiss,
and I really enjoyed that book, especially at that time
of my life in a teenager Starcy, how can I
(36:39):
guide my life in a different way? That's so great?
I have to read those tell Miguel, thank you so
much for having this conversation with me. I am honored
to call you a friend and honored to share a
basque in your energy, in your life. Mh well, do
(37:01):
you have all my love and please whatever you go,
share it. Thank you so much, Thank you so much
for listening. I'm happy to be connected with you. Connections
with Evil Gloria is a production of Unbelievable Entertainment in
(37:22):
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Hello, everyone, Welcome back to Connections with Eva Longoria. I'm Longoria,
and in this podcast, I am exploring our connections to everything.
One topic I can keep coming back to again and again,
probably because it's the most important, is the connection with
ourselves and the connection to our inner spirit and our
(00:22):
connection to our purpose in this life, in this world,
on this planet. I've been exploring this question for most
of my life, and I am well read about it.
I love reading. I just love reading. I don't read fiction.
I only read nonfiction, and that's how I stumbled upon
the amazing book of the Four Agreements by Don Mee Ruis.
(00:46):
Part of it affirmed how I lived my life already,
like I actually never take things personal, and people like
you never take anything personal, Like I just don't. What
is the point And I don't make assumptions in my life.
When I met my husband, I said, are we boyfriend girlfriend?
Because I'm not assuming I'm your girlfriend? You know. He
was like, he was like, oh okay. Like I was like,
(01:07):
you've have to clarify this. So it affirmed the way
I was living and then also taught me some new things,
you know about being impeccable with my word and just
how words can create emotional poison, and just exploring this
idea of like why we're here and how you can
better connect to yourselves. I've had some amazing people on
the podcast already talking about spirituality, love and extending the
(01:30):
truth of who we are, and so I have a
lot of questions for our guests. I'm so excited to
have spiritual teacher Don Migu Luise with me today. You've
heard me mention him in so many episodes. I referenced
Don Miguel so many times in my life and in
this podcast. He's the best selling author who shares wisdom
from toldtech spirituality in his books of course, including The
(01:51):
Four Agreements, The Mastery of Self, the Fifth Agreement, and
Beyond Fear. So I want to welcome to the show,
Don Miguel, thank you for joining us. Well, it's a
great pleasure for me to be with your cares. You know,
I just feel so so happy every single moment. Yes,
(02:11):
it's wonderful. Oh, I'm so happy to talk to you
and I haven't seen you in years. And I will
say I met Don Miguel when I was going through
a tough time. I was going through divorce, and he
really guided me through that process in that moment. And
I always felt like, sometimes we seek help in crisis,
right like I'm going through divorce, I am, you know,
(02:33):
going through something at work, I'm going through a career change.
And I think what I love about your teachings, Don
Miguel is that they're not for only crisis mode. They're
actually for like, this is how you should live day
to day. And I find that really refreshing. That's the
way I live my life. You know, I lived my
life like this is the last day of my life.
(02:57):
But I plan that I would live for affair. Yeah,
only this moment really exists. And all the planet we
createm with the world that we call hope, I hope
that we will work, etcetera, etcetera. And we should remember
(03:17):
that Cope, it's the last demon who escaped from Pandora
bas Well. It is really a demon, you know, It's
like a carrod that a donkey is following and never
reach it. Uh huh. But if we have that awareness,
(03:38):
we can use hope in order to plan without expecting
that I will work or not work. But that guide
us at a certain direction, and it's complimentary to faith.
You don't. Faith is believe in something a hundred without
a doubt. That is faith. Faith is life working right
(04:05):
here and right now. Is the force that most matter,
is what we used to create the dream, the reality
in the one we are living, and it's right here
and right now. Then with faith we can enjoy every
single moment. Everything will depends where we focus our faith.
(04:31):
Then the right direction to focus our faith is in ourselves.
Like I have faith in me mm hmm, that I
know that I'm alive in this moment. I don't know
if that Tony I will be are not alive or tomorrow,
it doesn't matter. But right now I enjoy what I
(04:55):
am doing, and right now I just speaking to you
and with everybody who is listening to us. That gave
me so much pleasure. Mhmm. You know, in certain points
would not be that important to be right or wrong
or good or but no, is just the creation of
(05:19):
the masterpiece of life, of the art that we create,
which is the story of our life, the one. As
you know, we are the main character and everybody else
is just a secondary character. Because for me, the story
of my life is real, is what I live in
and I know that is the same for everybody around me.
(05:42):
They live in their own story, and in their story,
I'm just a secondary character. That's why it's a waste
of time taking anything personally, because whatever they think about
me or they say about me, is really talking about
the second very character who live in their story, not
(06:03):
in mind. M hm, m hmm. Then to be aware
is the most important thing of life. We can say,
to be aware of what we are living, doing, etcetera, etcetera,
because that gives us so much peace and of course
is the greatest expression of love mhm. And we find
(06:26):
out that what is the biggest problem is that distortion
of love. It means the way we learn to love,
because we learn to love the same way that our
parents love or friend's love, society loves. And this is
with conditionous yes, conditional love. I love you if you
(06:51):
let me control you. Yeah, But you love me if
I let you control me. And this is how you
us love to each other with control, when we understand
every single conflict that exists in humaney, Yeah, we understand
over the violence, war, everything, because this is the main problem.
(07:16):
We love with contitions, which is exactly the opposite of love.
Right the first time I heard of total Technoledge was
your book. And you know you were born into a
Toltec family of healers, and you were raised in and
rule Mexico by a healer and your father was a
(07:38):
shaman at your your grandfather. So it feels like wow,
what a way to grow up. First of all, but
did you feel pressure to go into this family business?
You took a different path for a while. But I
just want to know, like how did you arrive to
this knowledge? And then I want to talk a little
(07:58):
bit about Toltec culture and history. You know, you were
around these ideas of spirituality growing up. How did that
shape you as a human. Well, the way that my
parents said, okay, is by having faith in myself. They
always tell me, whatever you want to do, if you
really want to do it, it's gonna happen. They tell
(08:19):
me since I was a child that I'm dreaming all
the time, that everything is a dream. And I find
out that he is. It is true, that is a dream.
We are dreaming right now, we're dreaming now here. Of
course when are we awake, Yeah, then what we see
is just a reflection of what is real. And to
(08:39):
prove that is so easy. Just closualize and everything disappear
mhm d. Open the eyes and everything appear again, which
means that we are seeing the reflection of what is real.
It's like you're inside of a mirror and everything we
see is just a reflection. Then as we are dreaming
(09:01):
and we have the awareness that they're dreaming, and then
we have the awareness that everybody is doing exactly the
same thing. They live their life dreaming and they don't
know they are dreaming. You know, when the brain is sleeping,
the dream shift and change all the time. Then when
we are not focusing something, we have the tendency of
(09:23):
day dream. Just like when gary sleeping, you'll go back
until certain activities that happened in the past, or you
even can't go to the future and dream certain activities
that maybe may happen mhmm. But when something hooked your
attention to right here and right now, that someone can
(09:44):
tell you what you've been well, we are dreaming, and
he scarre dreaming all the time, and it's so beautiful
when you really understand that and you find out that yes,
you are the producer, that there actor of the dream
of your own dream. So if we're dreaming right now
(10:06):
when do we wait? Well, awareness lead us to that point. First,
to be aware that yes, this is a dream, it
looks so real, and in fact, in the dream, merging
with the rest of the dreamers is real because you're
real that we have Olympic Games, is real, that we
(10:27):
have elections and all of that. But everyone have a
completely different point of view of whatever event that is happening.
And the point of view they have is depending how
they're dreaming the daily life. It will depend of the
whole belief system that they have, because this is how
(10:48):
they're gonna judge what they're perceiving. That's how they're gonna
justify whatever event that is happening. So, I mean, the
goal of us being here, which from what I gather
is is to awaken, like, don't be in this autopilot
of a dream, but to get to a point in
life where we are aware and awakened by our purpose
(11:12):
and our reason for being here, which, by the way
you've said it, Manytimes, is to love. It's to love.
And I love that you say that about the body
and the physicality, because I you know, I've heard Echertole
and I've talked to Ja shetty and deep October, and
I feel like the common denominator everybody has is that
this particular world is a gift. It's a gift to
(11:34):
us physically feeling and showing love. And I just love that.
Dr Brian Weiss says the same thing. You know, there's
all these experts in different fields saying the same thing.
Of like, the main purpose of humanity is to love,
and this physical body is um the way we can
(11:55):
experience that. Yes, I can say without about that I
am an incarnation of love. But every single human is
an incarnation of love because it's the only thing that
is real, you know, as the incarnation of love, we
(12:21):
fall of grace, if we can say that word, when
we fall into the contious love and we kind of
forget that we are love is the greatest temptation, falling
into contitionsal love, because we become like everybody else. We
(12:42):
are dreaming like everybody else. To be aware of that,
to find out that yes, you are love, your incarnation
of love, everything will change completely because you're not expected
that someone love you. You don't need love, you don't
need to be loved because you are loved, and that
(13:06):
makes the whole difference in life. Being loved is just
enjoy life itself because life itself is also loved. Yeah, yes,
I love that. I find the history of pro technology
(13:29):
very beautiful and fascinating. But first of all, who are
the toll text people? They preceded the Aztecs. We have
to understand that toltech is a word. And now what
is a word in the translation in English is artists?
(13:49):
Then adulte is an artist is not exactly people who
live in Mechical long time ago. No, Toltec is any
human who live in the planet Earth. It doesn't matter
what languages speak, where geographically live could be in Australia, Japan, Africa,
(14:11):
doesn't matter. Every single human is an artist. Every single
human is a toltec and they're creating all the time,
even if they don't do anything, they're creating. Tot tech
knowledge is the knowledge of an artist. And this is everywhere,
(14:33):
is in anyone. It's just the language that is different,
because let's see, in English is artists, in the Spanish
is artista, and in every language have their own way
to say toltec. Toltec is only the nagata a word
for it, right, Yeah, you talked a lot about in
(14:56):
your book of a Concepts, and I remember you talking
about the concept of marriage and how when divorce happens,
it's because we both don't have the same concept of
what marriage should look like or be like, and so
my conditions are different than your conditions. So I will
love you to the end of time, if you don't
cheat on me, if you don't betray me, if you
(15:20):
buy me things. And then his idea of love is
I will love you if you serve me, if you
provide for me, if you like in a marriage. There's
so many conditions. But then we have unconditional love with
our children. There is nothing my son could do that
would make me stop loving him exactly, and that unconditional
(15:45):
love is always around us, but we only focused into
conditional love. That's why we're all the time, and that's
why we are so afraid to be Josh. That's why
we do what society want us to do, try to
please other people's point of view. That's why we pretend
(16:06):
to be what we are not. And we know that
we are not authentic because we learned to be that way,
because everybody is in that way. M M. Then authenticity
is something that we need to look for and the
(16:26):
only way is to un learn what you really know. Right,
take an emotional inventory, yes, exactly of the agreements you
did not agree to. In order to be what you
really are, you have to find out what you are
not taking away everything that you're not. The only thing
(16:50):
that reminds is what you really are. M hmm. And
when you discover more and more what you really are,
you can help. But you just fall in love with
your self and you find out that you are the
love of your life. You are the priority because you
find out that without your physical body, you cannot interact
(17:13):
with anybody. You can give or receive love, you can
share your creation and you cannot perceive anybody else's creation.
And this stands to our physical body. Then when we
understand that point and we are said or body just
(17:34):
the way, it is just like magic, everything change. You
start looking at yourself with a little smile and you
love what you see. It doesn't matter how you look like,
because well, any way you look like you're beautiful. The
(17:56):
problem is that they teach us what they believed beauty is,
and we try to be what we are. Not if
we try to be with somebody else, if we kept
out be anybody else, like nobody else can be me? Yeah,
how do you think we should balance unconditional love to
(18:20):
each other as human beings and still hold your place
of being respected or being valued or you know, I
feel like you know, all the memes and all the
self help is about leaning in and you deserve more
and you deserve better and self worth and self value
and like stand your ground and hold your space. And
(18:43):
sometimes it feels contradictory to unconditional love to all And
you've given examples of it in some of your books
about the abused wife, right, like don't take it personal?
You're like, how can I not take it personal? He's
beating me up? And you you give a really good
example of how that has nothing to do with you,
but you do have the choice to leave. Right, talk
(19:07):
a little bit more about that, of like how you
can have faith in ourselves and belief in yourself and
unconditional love for others but still protect your you're being well,
this is very simple and it's very easy to understand.
And everything is about the way you loved yourself. It's
(19:27):
how you love yourself. Because let's see, if you have
a pet and somebody comes and mistreat your pet. You
will get angry right away and you will defend your pet.
You will not allow that anybody going hurt your dog
or your cat or whatever your pet is. Then how
(19:50):
come we allow other people that come and hurt or
physical body physically or verbally? How can we gonna allow
that anybody come and abuse or party if we don't
do anything? And many times we feel yes, I deserve that.
(20:12):
And as you can see, is a level how much
we love ourselves. Because when you love and respect yourself,
you will never allowed that anybody will come and mistreat you.
It is someone abuse you a little more that the
way you love yourself as the moment that you live,
(20:37):
you don't stay there. Mm hmm. This is extremely important
to understand. And if someone disrespects you, maybe first time
you say okay, yes stop there, Never do that to
me again, never, because you love yourself so much exactly
so it comes from loving yourself unconditionally first and are
(21:00):
most mm hmm. You do it one time, okay, I
would allow that, don't do it again. To do it twice,
that's it is over. Go ab you somebody else, someone
who who let you abuse that person, but not here
the only reason for you to be here is to
(21:24):
protect your physical body. This is the reason. That's the
only reason we're here, to keep your physical body alive,
to allow your physical body to joy. You know, your
physical body has been loyal to you all the time. Yes,
you the one who are not loyal to your physical Yeah, okay, Yeah,
(21:51):
and you you have a different perspective on what you're
gonna allow and not allow. Yeah, if you really love yourself. Yeah.
You always talk a lot about living your life with authenticity.
You know. I hear that word a lot, like be
your authentic self, and I think, you know, talk about
(22:13):
loving yourself and having faith in yourself. That's a beautiful idea.
But but what do you mean by live authentically? See,
we're children. We learned to act. As soon as we
dominate the language that we speak. We start acting just
to be a prooved but whoever is around us to
(22:37):
be good for other people. Then, when we are acting
in the beginning, we act, and we are we are.
But when we start having the influence not just from
our parents, but the school and everybody around, they tell
us what we are. We try to please everybody and
(22:59):
we create our own identity with that identity. We try
to be accepted wherever we are, by our parents, by
the teachers, but the friends, but a little society, and
we're acting in order to be accepted, but we don't
know that we're acting. And with experience or acting becomes
(23:23):
stronger and more powerful, and we master to be an
actor or actress even if we're not professional. We're really
good at it, even if you don't do it for
a living. Yeah, let's see if by for example, a
child tends eleven years old, unless they make a tantrum
(23:46):
and people react to that tantrum. Then if they see
that that tantrum works, everything will the tantrum will be
stronger because in practice and practice more and more that
tant in People will react to those stantons. But we
know that it's just an acting. But also I think
(24:09):
a lot of people act in life. They're putting on
what they should be because of society and social constructs
and acceptable norms of who and what we should be.
That we act so much we believe it, yes, exactly,
and then we don't remember who we really were because
we've been this fake person for so long and we
(24:34):
know we know we are fake, and that in turn
creates conflict within ourselves. Yeah, this is how we are
losing authenticity little by little. Untilticity is way behind and
the only way to recover is by change. Are acting
(24:57):
all around. We don't even know how we start acting.
But the way we at at home it is different
that the way we act at school, That the way
we act with friends, That the way we act in
that job or in any circumstance, we were at different
mask And this is how we project ourselves, is the
(25:21):
way we wish to be perceived by other people. M
but which are more and more authentic in certain points.
You don't care anymore about what people think about you.
That happens with age, right, Like I don't care anymore,
but exactly, I don't know what you think of me.
But when you're younger, you care so deeply. And it's
(25:44):
like I always say, oh, I wish I had my
twenty year old body with my fifty year old mind.
You know exactly, because now we have that experience in
the Mastery of Love. You talk a lot about this
about the image of perfection and how we're trying to people,
but whose image? Who image of perfection? Societies, God, religion,
your spouses, image of whatever perfect like your friends, Like
(26:09):
it really is a war own. Yeah, yeah, it's your
own because you judge yourself because the biggest Josh and
more semperit Josh, because yourself. And this is how we
also josh other people. But yes, we really are so
so hard with ourselves because we are not the way
(26:30):
we should be accorded that idea of perfection. Mhm. We
just don't know that we are perfect just the way
we are. Like everybody is perfect the way they are,
but in their minds they're not perfect. They always want
certain changes. We always josh or a physical body or yeah,
(26:53):
oh yeah. But do you think that's why we hunt
for love in others Because we lack that love for
ourselves and so we try to capture it in someone else. Well,
we forget that we are love. We are love, not loved.
We are love our love. Yeah yeah, but then we
(27:14):
need the attention. We think that we need someone who
love us, and we sacrifice ourselves. Is someone give us
that attention? You know, like the Masters of Love. I
tell the story about the men and the pizza. Always
(27:36):
tell that story. Yes, yes, imagine that you have a
magical kitchen that you great any kind of food you
want to not just for yourself, but for anyone whoever
came to you. You give that food, they are so
happy and you don't need any kind of food at all.
(27:59):
Then you see us. I want to knock at your
door and bring a pizza and tell you you know what,
these pizza can beat yours. If you do whatever I
want you to do. You will laugh and said, what,
I have a magical kitchen. I have pizza much better
than the way you offer me. Why should I please
(28:22):
you for a pizza? But in the other hand, it's
just starting and someone knock at your door and say,
you can have this pizza if you just do whatever
I want you to do. They say, okay, give me
the pizza, and I do whatever. They say. If you're
(28:44):
good tomorrow, I bring another pizza. Then we sell ourselves
for a pizza. Mm hmm. If you change because of
the pizza. With love, we are love. We have the
magical kitchen. We had love for everything, not just for ourselves.
(29:04):
We create love to feed the entire universe. Yeah, you
you have this great way of transforming complex human issues
into simple common sense. And they like in all of
the the mastery of self and mastery of Love, and
of course the four agreements in the fifth Agreement. But
one thing that I learned from you was being impeccable
with my word. And I'm not It's not like I'm
(29:26):
I'm a liar. It's not that you really stepped it
out in a bigger way. It's like somebody said the
other day about ego. I always thought somebody who had
an ego was like arrogant, and like for me, the
definition was somebody who showed off their money or did
this or that. And so I was like, well, I
don't have an ego, but no ego is in many
(29:47):
forms right. And the same thing with being impeccable with
your word, I said, of course I'm impeccable with mord.
I say what I mean, and I mean what I say.
And but there were all these nuances that you talked
about in creating emotional poison, like just being where of
what's coming out of your mouth. And I feel like
in this era of over communication with social media and
(30:09):
the Internet, of course we are as a society, we're
so much less careful with our word. We are so
much less impeccable with our word. There's fake news there's
people tweeting false information, and so I think we are
in a society that is bombarding us with emotional poison.
(30:30):
How do we navigate that today? The answer is the
fifth agreement, be skeptical, but learned to listen, which means
don't believe me, don't believe anybody else, and don't believe yourself.
(30:54):
But listen, listen what I say, listening about other people say,
and listen to yourself what you say, and use the
power of the doubt in order to see if what
they say is true or is not true. And of
(31:18):
course don't take it personally because they have the right
to lie to and especially when they don't know their lying,
don't believe them. But listen because and what they saying
there's part of truth that can be used by you
mm hmm. Then if it's very offensive or whatever, you
(31:41):
don't need to be there. You don't need to hear
people talking about all those slices or whatever. And you know,
with these media, so it's just like you said, there's
a lot of people sending voice on all around. Well,
there's something that personally you cannot control, but you can
step aside because you're not part of that society. Really,
(32:06):
something is important to understand is that before you was born,
society already exists with all the injustice or the violence
of the poverty. It exists without you. That you are
not responsible for what is happening in society, not at all.
(32:33):
Society graph you put inside of you all those beliefs
and make you believe that you are responsible. Well, you're not.
Whatever you do is because you want to share. You
what to give is your art and you do it
because you want to do it. That because you have
(32:55):
to do it. Mhm, Like is your case. See you
had that beautiful voice, that's what you share. You're a
great actress, that's what you share. Mhmm. You don't need
to go and do something that you're not an expert,
that you don't want to do, because there many other
(33:16):
people that are respect to do that and that there
there was a will to those things. Because you don't
need to go and save the wealth or or save
the silvers or safety atmosphere or whatever. No, you don't
watch at the best. You go shares your voice. Everybody
sing with you. So you're acting or you name it,
(33:38):
and that makes you feel good. Here's you're saying. You
do you do? You me, you exactly because you know
that was my next question. What you just answered was like,
how can a deeper connection with yourself change the world?
You know? And so that seems like I always you know,
I do a lot of philanthropy, and people go, my god,
(34:00):
the world's problems are so big. How could I possibly
make a dent in the environment or in this and that?
And I said, you don't have to. You don't have
to solve the world's problems. But you can change your household.
You can change your relationship with your family, with your spouse,
with your children, Like I do think changing your connection
(34:21):
with yourself changes all of the actions and the domino
effects that that has in the world. You know, it
will eventually affect that change, don't you think? Yeah? You
know in all of my lectures, of most of the lectures,
when I just directly to the people, I asked it
please help me to change the world. And I don't
(34:46):
refer to society of humanity, No, I talk about the
only word that you can change, which be your world,
your own creation. If you change your world as magic,
you would change what is around here, the relationship that
(35:08):
you have which you're below with with your children and
your partners, with your friends. And this is because you
change your world. And by the way, yes, it's the
only world that you can change, and you make it
better as you create your personal heaven. It doesn't matter
if the result of the people live in health, it's
(35:31):
a help that you didn't create. But the hope that
they have is your heaven. Because if you are that love,
people love to be around here. Just smile and people
love to be around here. You don't need to go
and look for anything, just be you. Mm hmmm yeah. Um.
(35:55):
I ask everybody this on the podcast, but what is
the book you think everybody must read? It could be
one of yours, But but I always find uh, I
get so many good book recommendations of you know, somebody's
like this book changed my life, And is there a
book you think every human being must read? Well? When
(36:16):
I was at teenager, I read Damnian The Herman Hess,
and later I read The Stephen Wolf also Hermand Hiss,
and I really enjoyed that book, especially at that time
of my life in a teenager Starcy, how can I
(36:39):
guide my life in a different way? That's so great?
I have to read those tell Miguel, thank you so
much for having this conversation with me. I am honored
to call you a friend and honored to share a
basque in your energy, in your life. Mh well, do
(37:01):
you have all my love and please whatever you go,
share it. Thank you so much, Thank you so much
for listening. I'm happy to be connected with you. Connections
with Evil Gloria is a production of Unbelievable Entertainment in
(37:22):
partnership with I Hearts Michael Pura podcast Network. For more
podcasts from my Heart, visit the I Heart Radio app,
Apple podcast, or wherever you listen to your favorite shows.
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Ding dong! Join your culture consultants, Matt Rogers and Bowen Yang, on an unforgettable journey into the beating heart of CULTURE. Alongside sizzling special guests, they GET INTO the hottest pop-culture moments of the day and the formative cultural experiences that turned them into Culturistas. Produced by the Big Money Players Network and iHeartRadio.
40s and Free Agents: NFL Draft Season
Daniel Jeremiah of Move the Sticks and Gregg Rosenthal of NFL Daily join forces to break down every team's needs this offseason.
Crime Junkie
Does hearing about a true crime case always leave you scouring the internet for the truth behind the story? Dive into your next mystery with Crime Junkie. Every Monday, join your host Ashley Flowers as she unravels all the details of infamous and underreported true crime cases with her best friend Brit Prawat. From cold cases to missing persons and heroes in our community who seek justice, Crime Junkie is your destination for theories and stories you won’t hear anywhere else. Whether you're a seasoned true crime enthusiast or new to the genre, you'll find yourself on the edge of your seat awaiting a new episode every Monday. If you can never get enough true crime... Congratulations, you’ve found your people. Follow to join a community of Crime Junkies! Crime Junkie is presented by audiochuck Media Company.