July 7, 2022 • 43 mins
Chelsea heads to the Martha Stewart Omnimedia offices to discuss losing a favorite sibling, dating in your 80s, and the very different types of advice they give to their audiences. Then: A singleton wonders if she’ll ever find love again. A lesbian struggles to gain the support of her parents as she comes out. And Martha’s curious about Chelsea’s constant reinvention.
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Need some advice from Chelsea? Email us at DearChelseaProject@gmail.com
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Executive Producer Nick Stumpf
Produced by Catherine Law
Edited & Engineered by Brandon Dickert
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:01):
Oh, good morning morning. How are you, Chelsea. Well, we're
in New York City today. It's a beautiful day in
the neighborhood. Joe and I have been exercising, like to
fitness fanatics since we've been in New York City. That's amazing.
We have walked the other day, he walked thirty five
thousand steps. I don't know why I didn't, but I
guess Disneyland. I know he's so he loves it. You
(00:23):
know that little app, your heart app on your phone
and you can track your steps. And we rented city
bikes yesterday and we drove all the way while we rode,
not drove. I hate when people say they drove a bike.
We rode all the way up to Central Park, all
the way around Central Park. We first we got our
little bagel because we've been trying at different bagel places
all over the city so far. Yeah, I do, but
(00:43):
I don't know what it's called. So that's helpful. And
we rode our bikes up. We got a bagel, cream
cheese and locks and the whole thing, and then we go.
We drove a road through Central Park, stopped at one
of these little pools ponds. It was more like an
algae pond, but it was pretty We ate our bagel.
Then we rode our bikes all the way down the
(01:05):
West Side Highway to our favorite little restaurant, Grand Banks,
where we sit on a boat and we had like
a strawberry mohito, and then we rode our bikes all
the way back up town and it was just glorious.
I mean, New York City is just so much fun,
especially when you don't live here, like it's always a vacation.
And Joe has started a laundrymat in our hotel room,
(01:28):
so he does laundry pretty much from I wake up
and the dryers going every morning, so he can must
wake up in the middle of the night and then
put another load. And so you guys, actually you have
a washer in our hotel room and it's more like
an apartment than a hotel room. That we read and
he does our laundry and then I hear the washing machine.
He does laundry constantly, and then he irons it all
(01:52):
and then he does it again. He starts again, and
if everything's clean, but it's everything's a mess, like everything's
shrunk or tight eyed. So the other day I got
a jumpsuit out of the dryer and it just had
chocolate stains everywhere, And I was like, what the funk
is this? Is this like a tight eye situation that
(02:13):
you're trying out, like what he goes to hunting? That
would it must have been something in your pocket, like
a piece of chocolate, which is so me, you know,
to have like a chocolate nutcluster left over in my pocket,
Like so my modeled so gross. Yeah, so one of
my jumpsuits was ruined, and one of my sweatpants, a
pair of sweatpants was also ruined, and that one had
a big chocolate stain right on the asshole. So I
(02:34):
could definitely not wear that one. And so I told
him to put a pin in his laundromat and learn
how to fucking do laundry before continuing. And then he
told me that that's racial profiling because all Chinese people
run laundromats. And I said, but you're not Chinese, So
what how is that racial profile? You're Filipino? He said,
you know what I'm talking about. I mean, I was
(02:55):
going to ask if you said that he irons. I
feel like it's a known thing that white people don't
iron their clothes enough, like I am currently wearing an
unroned color. That's funny. Well, that would make sense. And
my privilege, like we don't even think we have to
iron our clothes. We could just go out looking like schleps.
I don't have to say at least my husband is
one man who I told him at the beginning of
our marriage, I will never iron your shirts if you
(03:16):
would like them iron, he died, Well, this isn't the fifties. Yeah,
I mean, nobody should be ironing anything for anybody else.
Unless Joe wants to continue iron name my things, that's fine.
But I would appreciate him taking out the laundry part,
because he's ruined a couple of my jumpsuits now, either
by shrinking them like they're too you know, some of
them you're not supposed to watch, just supposed to dry clean.
(03:37):
But I did send like three of my jumpsuits down
to dry clean at the hotel that we stay at,
and I have to say, I got back and I
just caught the number out of the corner of my eye,
and I said, what is It was five hundred and
eighty six dollars to dry clean three jumpsuits, And I
was like, you guys, that's not right. Even I know
that's not right. One of my girlfriends, she lives in
(03:58):
West Hollywood. I'm sure she was getting a stun in
Beverly Hills. She said she took several sweaters and two
blankets that you need to dry clean to a dry cleaner's.
She got the bell, went to pick it up. It
was sixteen hundred dollars. I was like, where are you taking?
She goes, oh, with such if your dry cleaner has
a name and it's not just dry cleaner, then you
(04:20):
should not be taking, especially your blankets. There blanket, I
didn't know you could dry clean. I guess that makes
sense dry clean blanket grant comforters and yeah, yeah, I
don't know. I'm just glad that I don't. I you know,
laundry feels good when it's done, because we've been on
the road now for like three weeks, the both of us,
and we have so much accumulation of dirty stuff. So
(04:41):
it does feel good to have it clean. But it
doesn't feel good when it's all different colors and different lens.
When you get it out, you can never wear it again. Yeah,
so you know, there you go, there you have it.
That's the crux of our That's what our relationship is
about currently dry cleaning or laundry. Sorry, okay, everybody. Here
are my up ming stand up dates. I'll be at
the Just for Last Comedy Festival in Montreal July, hosting
(05:04):
a gala Gala also pronounced as Gala. I am in
Vancouver August twelve, two shows in Vancouver. I'm in Calgary Saturday,
August thirteen and Sunday August fourteen. That's Calgary. And then
I have tons of dates coming up in the fall,
starting with Saratoga, California, Niagara Falls, Long Beach, California, Bakersfield, California,
(05:29):
Pasa Roblais, California, Wheatland, California, and lots of places in Florida, Tampa,
Fort Myers, Daytona Beach, Hollywood, Florida, and the list goes
on and on. Oh in San Diego and Riverside, California.
So lots of dates in California and Tucson, Colorado Springs. Anyway,
go to Chelsea Handler dot com for your tickets. I
(05:49):
will see you guys all there. These will be the
final dates of my Vaccinated and Horny tour, and I
can't wait to see all of you in person. Now
that everybody well most people are vaccinated and officially horny.
That's with three at the end, Katherine, just in case
you didn't know how to spell horny. Perfect. Okay, So
(06:09):
today we have somebody on who is very You'll know
her when you hear her. Her website is called Martha
dot com. The Bedford by Martha Stewart is her new
immersive restaurant in Vegas. Have you heard of that yet?
An immersive restaurant. She's got CBD, she's got a CBD line,
(06:30):
she has nineteen crimes, Martha's Chardonnay, and her name is
Martha Stewart. She's the founder of Martha Stewart Living Omnimedia.
It's the dream to have an omnimedia Martha. Welcome to
the show. Hi, It's always such a delight to see you. Well,
I'm so happy that you're here in my office and
(06:50):
that we can talk. You know, we've never really just talked. Yes,
we've interacted before. We've had some social media interaction. We
bumped into each other most recently at Jimmy Fallon show.
That was so fun, but I think it was seth
Meyers though, oh you know what it was, Seth Meyers.
It's so hard to keep all these men straight, Isn't
it very hard because you do get mixed up. Late
(07:12):
night is late night, and there's like at least three
or four of them that you have to keep track of. Yeah,
you know, and I was just your favorite. Oh god,
don't ask to ask me that. I would have to
say Jimmy Fallon just because I do his show the
most often, so I would say that, you know, he's
a real sweetheart. I like all of them. Is so hard.
I missed David Litterman the most. Well, you guys had
(07:33):
a nice report, and we we worked together a long time.
And now I think I've appeared on Seth Meyers more
than any other guests. That was a record for a while.
And now I don't know. I think I like Stephen Colbert.
Do you do that show? Oh yeah, I've done it,
but I don't regularly. I did Fallon more regularly. He's
(07:53):
a little more difficult, Yeah, but he's really smart. But
Letterman was difficult. No, No, I know Letterman had a
nice relationship. And did you guys have a relationship off screen?
I wish yeah, Well, because a lot of you know,
I was reading this Joan Rivers book because I was
I recently inducted her into the Comedy Hall of Fame
for Netflix, and I was reading a Joan Rivers book
(08:14):
and she was talking about her dynamic with Johnny Carson.
Did you ever do Johnny Carson show? Yes, yeah, that
was That was a hard show to do, That's what
she said, because everyone thought they had this great relationship,
but it was only for on camera. There was nothing
going on off camera. Did you Joan Rivers have any
affairs with anybody? Um, not that she spoke about in
the book, But I mean, I guess, you know, she
(08:35):
seemed to be like a person under herself. But I
don't mean narcissism or anything like that. Just she was
just so powerful, like her presence was so strong that
it would be hard to tell anybody else. But I
think she did. I think I wouldn't. I think I
eated her house once, and I think there was a
man around. Well, that's good to know, speaking of men.
What's going on in your love life these days? Nothing.
I had two mad crushes in the last month, which
(08:57):
is really good for me. Yeah, it turns out, you know,
one of them is married to the mother of some
friends of mine, and and I just he's so attractive,
but you don't you can't be a home record. No
I'm not. I've never been a home record, never, and
I've tried really hard not to be. It's hard to
have had the opportunity record and I have not taken
(09:18):
anybody up on it. And that's really where that's where
I meet men. They're all they're all marriage to friends
of mine or something like that. Well, it's very difficult
because I think there are certain ages we go through
where it's very tempting because you want to believe that, oh,
maybe this relationship that they're in is temporary, or maybe
they'll die. I always think, oh, gosh, couldn't that person
just die the wife you're not not painfully just die
(09:41):
and then But it hasn't worked out. No, it hasn't
worked out. But what I would say, I mean, I
find it curious because when was your when was your
last relationship? A while ago, not too long ago. But
while I go, Okay, so it's not that far in
the distance, right, so like a hundred years or well,
we know you're not a hundred years old. To Martha
(10:01):
nobody thinks that, and it speaking of you have a
lot of years ahead of you. But I would like
to know what, youth, what what do you think is
the most important thing in terms of legacy and leaving behind?
What is the thing that's most important for you to
be known for? Um, I would like to leave and
I think I am in the process of leaving a
vast library of good, authentic information for good living. That's
(10:27):
really It sounds kind of high minded and blah blah blah,
but it's actually a serious thing. You know, growing up,
I had the joy of cooking, and I had maybe
the better homes and Gardens house of a book of
household management. But I didn't have the Martha Stewart books
which are so phenomenally useful, and I didn't have the
(10:48):
ideas and the videos that we've created and produced over
the years. So so leaving that kind of legacy of
really good education, but also with a with a flair
for forliness and joyfulness and beauty, because I think we
what we do is pretty beautiful and all that information
we've created, that's a that's a good legacy. And did
(11:09):
you know when you were a little girl that this
is what you were going to be doing when you
grew up. No, Actually, I always wanted to be a teacher.
I was brought up loving my teachers. I was encouraged
to be a teacher to help little kids. I was
always doing the birthday parties and creating all kinds of
interesting things for the children to do, even when I
(11:30):
was a child. That started when I was about ten.
So teaching was always ingrained in me as a very
high minded profession, and that I could do it to
millions of people via television and via the Internet and
via magazines and books. That really has been fantastic. Yeah, yeah,
I mean it's really Could you have ever imagined that
(11:52):
you would have such an empire like this? I don't.
I don't think like that. I just think that. And
I just worked day to day and build and build
and try to try to fix and build and fix
and repair and build and create. That's how I go.
And what do you think the most influential relationships have
been in your life that have contributed to your sense
(12:12):
of self and your sense of success. Well, first of all,
I guess it was my parents, and I had a
nice relationship with both parents. I was my father's favorite
which didn't make me happy all the time, because I
don't think parents should have favorites. How many children six
the same as you? Yeah, what number are you? I
am number two? You were the baby, I'm number six. Well,
(12:33):
you're spoiled brat, and you got what you wanted, probably exactly,
but I got nothing that I wanted. I had to
work for every single Number two is a pretty hard
position to be, except that I got my father's attention
and none of the other kids did. He somehow fixated
on me, so and he and I were really good friends,
(12:54):
and I felt uncomfortable sometimes because I was he liked
me better than the other kids, and everybody knew it. Yeah,
they pretty much knew it, and I'm sure they held
it against me, and they probably still do. But my
mother was the egalitarian and she was great. She had
no favorites at all, and that kind of irked some
(13:16):
of the kids, but she was everyone was equal, everyone
got the share. You know. When my mother died, it
was so amazing. Her will was down to the penny
divided amongst the six children, you know, kind of nice. Well,
I think that's what a mother is meant to do,
is to love all of her children equally, because if
you ask any woman who their favorite child is, they
(13:38):
all say, oh, that's impossible. And if you ask any man,
their questions start to vary and they'll say things like
whoever needs me the most. You know, men love to
be needed. So how how does your relationship with your siblings?
Do they still feel that way? Do they still make
fun of the fact that you were the favorite? Well, no,
because we're I mean, my two closest siblings died unexpectedly.
(13:59):
The two youngest children died and um not not after
they were married and after they both had children, and
they just died from stupidity. I think I think they
were very careless about their health, so they did not
have to die. That's my theory, and I think it's
their children's theory also. So they've missed out on the grandchildren,
(14:21):
and they've missed out on the success of the of
their own children. It's it's sad, but they were they
were my favorites, my brother George and my sister Laura.
And Laura worked for me for a very long time
and George was a builder and he did a lot
of projects with me and two fabulous kids, and I'm
friends with all their children, you know, nice, nice friends
(14:43):
with their children, which is which is important to me.
But the other is my sister Kathy married a man
that hated me. So you know, we don't even go there.
We try to have a relationship, but not not a
very close one. Is this too much information? It's great?
And then brother Eric, Brother Eric, he's my older brother
and we've always been friends. And he's a fine craftsman
(15:06):
and I really admire his artistry and he knows it.
And he's older than I am, and he's, you know,
complaining a little bit about getting old, and I don't
I don't like that. I don't want him to complain
because he's a strong guy. And then we have the
brother that that brother, I guess every family has, I
know which one you're talking about. I have one of
those two have one. Yes. But he had a good
(15:28):
reason he went to Vietnam. Oh okay, So he is
a very good reason for being the way he was. Yeah,
my brother does not have a good reason. He did
not go to Vietnam. So I'll have to follow up
on that later. Yeah, but I wish my brother would
write a book about his experience in Vietnam. Those guys
don't want to write books about their experiences, Yeah, because
they don't want to talk or remember it. It's too Yeah,
(15:50):
and you know what, it would be so interesting now
in retrospect to know what they went through. I mean,
Vietnam was a hard war. Yeah, yeah, Vietnam. For our generation,
it was Iraq and Afghanistan. And we still haven't even
seen the after effects of what those soldiers went through. Right,
And kids don't know anything about war, that's the thing. Well, yeah,
(16:12):
and it's happening all over the world. Generation right now
doesn't know about war and the effect it has on people. Uh,
it's so crazy to me that that they don't know it.
And yet Ukraine is happening right now, and and they
don't know, they don't understand how devastating it is to
a population. Yeah. Seeing those pictures coming out of Mariopole
(16:33):
or any of those cities, you're just like, it's the
most senseless act of destruction. The women with their babies
crossing borders for food and shelter, and the children carrying
their little white kitty cats on their shoulders. Yeah, yeah,
it's so horrible. So to pivot, I want to ask
you something about your experience. What do you think is
one of your favorite things about growing older? Favorite thing? Yeah,
(16:58):
I don't have one, Yes, you do, come on, not
one because first of all, I don't think about age
or aging. I do not think about it. Uh, some
thing's happened to you. You know, you're your foot, you
stepping a hole in your rupture your achilles tendant. I
did that last year, and that was a stupid thing
because it's hurt me for a year. And that that's
(17:23):
the least favorite thing is is getting into any kind
of pain. Yeah, my favorite thing about getting older is
absolutely not one thing. And there you have it, everybody,
there's not one favorite thing about getting older. I thought
we would impart some positive wisdom from Martha's store. Not
a thing people. Okay, Well, on that note, we're gonna
take some callers. I give advice. It's just off the cough.
(17:44):
I'm not a medical doctor. You're not a medical doctor
unless you are a medical doctor. And I don't know
about that. But I know a lot about medicine. Yeah
so do I. Actually I love medicine. So Katherine, tell
us what we have in store for this episode. While
we have all kinds of questions that are right up Martha's.
Ali will take a quick break and we'll be right
back with Martha Stewart and Chelsea. Okay, and we're back.
(18:10):
And Martha brought some Easter eggs, even though they were
just they're not Easter eggs, They're just eggs from her
chickens who lay different colored eggs. Yeah, I thought they
were Easter eggs, and then upon closer inspection and Martha
telling me, I realized they are not Easter eggs. Well,
our first question comes from Heather. She says, Dear Chelsea,
(18:30):
knowing how much you and your family love Martha's vineyard
and that you go every year, I was hoping you
could share some suggestions on where to go and what
to do. My husband and are two year old, are
joining another couple and they're one year old at the
end of July. Staying in Edgartown one of the places
we should absolutely visit. And where are the best places
to eat? The more outdoors the better. We can also
(18:52):
find some adults only time without the kids stay well,
Heather m and I just have to say, Martha, you
may already know this, but in researching this question, I
learned that a very vast portion of the Internet thinks
that you own Martha's vineyard as as By the way,
all my nieces and nephews growing up thought it was
Aunt Martha's vineyard, and they would say when I'd say
(19:16):
I'm going to the vineyard, Aunt Martha's vineyard, they all thought,
not only was it my island, but it was also
I had a vineyard on the island, and that's why
I stay far away from Martha's vineyard. I don't ever
go to Martha's vineyard, so I couldn't offer any advice.
That's so that's a brand disruption, and she's got her
(19:36):
own thing going on. She doesn't need to be tied
to some island exactly. If you're staying in Edgartown, you're
gonna find plenty of things to do. Most places to
eat are the quarter Deck, which has like outdoor total
vineyard food like fried clams, shride shrimp, cheeseburgers, hot dogs,
all that stuff that you can get that's fun for kids.
If you go down to the wharf, there's tons of
places for kids, little candy stores, lots of shopping all
(19:59):
down on edgar Town, up and down Main Street and
around the Harbor View. In hotel is a great place
to have a drink and look at the sunset harbor
side in and then there's the wharf and everywhere you
go around there you'll find places you can't go wrong
on Martha's Vineyard. And then you're gonna want to go
up island too, to like see the more quiet parts
of the vineyard, which is West Tisbury and Tisbury and
(20:21):
uh the three main towns are Oak Bluffs, Vineyard Haven
and edgar Town. And then up island there's some really pristine,
beautiful beaches like in chill Mark and Menemsha. Those are
places you want to go and get a great lobster
roll and watch the sunset. Especially it's specifically the beach
in Menemsha, so you're gonna have a beautiful time in
the summertime. That's my special spot, Martha's Vineyard. It is. Yeah,
(20:45):
my family, we had a house. They're growing up. You go, now, Yeah,
we go every summer. You're really knowledgeable about Yeah, I
mean I couldn't even I've been going to Maine for
like thirty years, and I couldn't tell you all those
things about my island. I told you about my experience
in Biddeford Pool, right where I ran into the bushes,
and then I went over to Kenny Bunkport to the
compound and George Bush gave me a tour of all
(21:08):
of his artwork and then wouldn't let us leave the house.
We were captured because Barbara Bush wanted us to come
over to play pickle ball, and so I brought my
whole crew. I had my brothers, my sisters, like ten friends.
We went over played pickleball and then I hear the
former president go, miss Handler, is that you? And I thought, oh,
I can't be seen with this guy after all my
(21:28):
political you know, musing said publicly, I'm like, I gotta
get out of here. And then he dragged me into
his house. He goes, you're not leaving. He goes, come
look at all my artwork. And I had sunglasses on,
and he said I need you to take your sunglasses off,
and I said, I'm pretty stoned, so I think I'm
going to leave them on. And he looked at me
(21:49):
and thought I was kidding again, which I wasn't. And
then shortly after there we were able to skid attle.
But it was actually he's very charming in person. I'm sure,
you've you've Yes, I've met him. And when I was
in Kenny for two years ago, I actually had dinner
with Barbara's daughter and her husband. We had a very
nice dinner. The Bushes were away at that that weekend,
(22:09):
so I didn't get to see them, but I just
saw George W's wife in Texas, so I went down
to give a talk and she was the honoree. So
we had a very nice little chat. Yeah, I love
Barbara his daughter. Yeah, she's great. So, yes, have a
great time in Martha's vineyard and those are the places
to hit up wonderful. Well, we have one caller today.
Her name's Sabrina and she says, dear Chelsea, my name
(22:31):
is Sabrina and I'm twenty four years old from New Jersey.
I came out to myself as queer in twenty nineteen,
to my friends and sister in early and then to
my parents in the middle of My parents were initially supportive,
telling me they would love me quote no matter what,
but quickly became dismissive, pointing out men they wish I
(22:52):
would date, which was really hard on me. It took
so much courage to come out in the first place.
I started dating my first girlfriend in September and decided
to try and reach out to my parents to talk
about my sexuality and see if I felt safe enough
to come forward about my relationship. Long story short, they
told me that this was my problem to deal with,
not theirs, and that they did not want to know
(23:14):
anything pertaining to that aspect of my life. It's been
hard for me to deal with both the fact that
my parents will not provide me with the support, acceptance,
and safe space that I had before I came out,
as well as not being able to give my girlfriend
everything her family has given me, which is nothing but
open arms and love. Last I talked to them, they
asked me to write down everything I needed from them
(23:35):
and they would tell me if it's something they could
give me. I tried to make them understand why the
way they are going about this is simply sucked up
and doesn't need to be this hard, But I'm still
struggling to find the right words as well as a
reason for why they've reacted in such a negative way.
Everyone I have come out to thus far has been
nothing but loving, supportive, and proud of me. Please help
(23:57):
Sabrina and she's here with us on the phone. Okay, Hi, Sabrita, Hi,
it's so nice to meet you, by the way. And
Martha Thrett like, what I know, surprise, surprise, surprise. Well,
I'm sort of surprised about your parents. Yeah, it's it's
been pretty hard, I think, just especially since all of
(24:20):
my friends and like literally everyone else I've come out
to has been so supportive. I was taken aback for sure. Well,
other than going to Chelsea, have you gone to a
psychiatrist to work this out with your parents? Oh? Yeah,
I joined a support group with other queer folks. I
have gone to a few therapists. They all just teld
(24:41):
me to like keep pushing forward, keep reaching out, kind
of rip off the band aid, do everything I can.
So that's kind of what I've been doing. But I
understand she has a different perspective and ACROSSSS, so kind
of giving her time I think has been the best
that she needs. But I still feel like I'm not
getting anything back from her. From your mom, yeah, my mom,
(25:04):
I mostly have like the most emotional connection with my mom.
My dad is like the sit back, I'm going to
support you silently kind of person. So it doesn't feel
natural for me to like want to go to him first,
which is also an issue that that I have. Yeah,
I think what you're describing is just going to take
(25:25):
some time, you know, And I think you should go
where the love is and when you have a support
of welcoming family on your girlfriend's side, dive into that
and lean into that during this time, because that's kind
of the support you need. And you're taking care of
yourself and that's never wrong. Looking out for yourself and
standing up for yourself and being honest and forthright to
the people you love about what you care about and
(25:46):
what you want in this life and your sexual identity
and all of that is important. So as long as
you're being honest with yourself, then nobody can hold anything
against you. Those are their issues that they're going to
have to overcome. You can keep in contact with them
and reach out and stuff, but it's it's going to
be their own kind of journey. And in the meantime,
you know, you should focus and go where the love
(26:07):
is and just enjoy your time with your girlfriend, enjoy
her family. You can get things from them that you're
not getting from your own family. And I guarantee you
your mother will come around. You're her daughter, you know,
unless she's some evil, demonic wizard, like she's gonna come around.
She's gonna miss you, and she's gonna want to be
a part of your life. Yeah, it's just for me specifically.
(26:29):
It's been hard because I am such an EmPATH and
I do. I have a hard time moving forward with
things if I know that I don't have acceptance from
my parents. So just like me, that's naturally who I am.
And I've kind of talked to my mom about this
because she has been the type of person who's like,
(26:51):
I don't care what anyone thinks, Like, I'm gonna do
what I want that makes me happy. But that's just
not who I am. Like, if I know that you
love me and I care about your opinion, it's hard
for me to like accept that it hasn't really progressed.
But that's not an EmPATH. That's interdependency. An EmPATH is
just feeling what other people are going through. Relying on
(27:13):
other people's opinions of you is codependency or interdependency, So
those two things have to be delineated in your mind.
Those aren't the same thing. You know, and you're relying
on your mother's acceptance of you. Like, if every single
one of us had to rely on someone else's acceptance,
none of us would be accepted. That's the most important
in your life. That's your attachment figure. It's your mom.
(27:34):
You said you have the most emotional connection to her,
So that's why you're affected by this. I know it's difficult,
but you have to learn a way to move through
this period of time without relying on her approval because
you don't have it, and you're not going to do
anything to convince her to give it to you, except
by living your life and demonstrating your happiness and your
(27:55):
self love. You know, for yourself, you respecting yourself is
the only way to get a people to respect you. Yeah.
So she's also told me that she doesn't want me
to like come out. So I have a younger brother.
He doesn't know anything about this, and she's kind of
making me wait. She doesn't want me to tell my family,
(28:15):
which I feel like I'm ready to do, but I
also don't want to betray her in that aspect. But
now it's kind of like I'm getting to the point
where I don't care how old is your brother. My
brother is seventeen, he's he's in high school, right, What
are your thoughts on that, Martha? Do you I think
(28:37):
your brother is old enough to hear your truth. It's
your story, like she doesn't get to write it for you. Yeah.
I am so bad at things like this. If you
inter relationships interpersonal, I'm horrible. This. Don't ask me to
call it like maybe the alone. She's like, I'm just
gonna be in my garden. Okay, that's where I don't
(28:58):
have to get involved with anybody's personal affairs. I mean
in our family there every kind of person, so we're
used to it. Yeah, and I guess in your mother's
family there, she's not used to differences. Yeah, they're They're Jewish,
they have tradition. It's weird though Jews are pretty inclusive,
(29:19):
you know, of everybody, especially gay people. Well yeah, because
Jews are a marginalized group in their own rights. So
I mean usually I grew up in a very Jewish
community and they were welcoming to everybody. But you know,
you telling your brother's your decision. Obviously, he's seventeen years old,
he's old enough to hear it, and you lying to
your brother is really just paving the way for him
(29:39):
to be upset with you down the road for not
being forthright. And I think it would be in your
best interest to also maybe instead of talking to your
mother directly, maybe composing an email where you could really
write down everything you want to say. And that she's
basically asking you to lie about your truth. She's not
accepting who you're saying you are, and that's so disrespectful
to you, and it's really kind of like slowing down
(30:01):
your process of growing. And her opinion is never going
to change the truth of the matter, and that's that
you're gay and that you love women and that you
have a girlfriend that you love. You know, like that's
never going to change. So I think it would behoove
you to think about writing that down in a letter
to her and saying, you know, I need you to
think about all the things I say and then come
(30:21):
back to me when you're in a state of acceptance
and reception instead of reactivity. Yeah, for sure, I will
definitely do that. Take your mom to a therapist with
you if you'd go. I've been trying for so many years,
you don't even know. Yeah, she hears Martha say it,
Hopefully she will. Yeah, just yea, record this part of
(30:42):
the episode and just play it back to your mother. Yea. Well,
thank you so much, Sabrina. Let us know how it goes. Okay, oh,
thank you so much. Love. Likewise, thanks Sabrina, Bye bye.
You get some heavy stuff here. It gets pretty heavy. Yeah,
I just have to answer questions like how to scramble
an egg. Yeah, well I could use that information as well.
(31:09):
Luckily no one's calling me asking me how to scramble
that egg, because it would be one hot mess. I
don't think I've ever scrambled eggs without having to throw
the pan away after the whole man. Yeah, basically. Well,
our next question comes from single white female. She's fifty seven.
She says, Dear Chelsea, I'm fifty seven and still single.
(31:30):
I've embraced being single more than ever, and truly have
never been one to have to have a man in
my life. My parents divorced when I was three, and
I'm an only child. I swore I would never get
married unless I was sure it was right, and would
not have children unless I was in a happy marriage.
Well that's my fate as it stands now. I've had
several long term relationships and lived with two of my boyfriends.
(31:53):
My last relationship ended in I feel anxious about dating
and have a really hard time being open to any
one or feeling attracted to most men I meet. Trying
the dating sites, but I hate them. I'm pretty fit, petite,
and was blessed with decent jeans. Not to sound vain
or anything, because I'm pretty modest, but I just have
a younger look and attitude. I'm feeling embarrassed about being
(32:15):
fifty seven and being still single. The past few years
of the pandemic and living in a relatively new area
have left me experiencing more solitude than I could ever imagine.
I get in my loner, only child state and find
the idea of having someone in my life constantly to
be frightening and overwhelming, leaving a little space for hope,
though of course I know you don't have a crystal ball.
(32:36):
But will I ever find a partner in this world
who I can deal with and who treats me with
the respect and love that I want? Will this anxiety
go away? I'm sincerely feeling a bit odd and alone
in the world. My mom never remarried and stopped dating
in her forties, and I don't want to end up
like her. My dad found love at seveny I got married,
so obviously it can always happen, right, ps how is
(33:00):
too young to consider? I'm embarrassed to like guys know
my age. Even on some levels, I should be proud
yours truly single white female, single white female. Wow, they
really open their hearts to you. I know, I know
you are a trusted soul. What do you think about
single dom in your fifties, Martha, Well, she's lucky. She's
(33:22):
had a lot of relationships, it sounds like, so she
doesn't sound like she's in terrible trouble. I have no
idea about dating sites. I tried that for a while.
I mean, what's actually when did you try plenty of fish? No,
I went out with three different people, and the algorithm
doesn't fit me, doesn't fit you. Well, I mean you're
a special situation, Martha. I'm an odd situation, so so
(33:45):
are you. Yeah, that's true dating. But I found my
guy at forty six, So not on a dating site. No,
not on a dating site, but I was on dating
sites and I was definitely having sex through dating sites
because well, I thought that's what they were for. And yeah,
like there are so many. First of all, if you
really don't want to be single, first stop saying that
you're embarrassed of your age. You're not. You can't be
(34:07):
embarrassed of your age. That's who you are. You're fifty
seven years old. Own it. So start with that, some
positive affirmations every morning, being happy about that, the fact
that you're still alive at fifty seven, and that you're healthy,
and that you look good and you you're you seem
to feel good about yourself. I mean, well, she said,
I mean, I don't know how good she feels about herself,
because she kept saying she was embarrassed with things about herself.
(34:27):
She's embarrassed he's single. She's embarrassed he's fifty seven. But
then she says, she looks good, she's petite, and she's
in good shape. You know, she's okay. She's okay, So
go out, you know, just go out a few more
times with different people. Yeah, you've got to exercise the
muscle of going out. So get down those whether it's
match dot Com or plenty of Fish or I don't
know what the hell all the websites are now to
(34:49):
know about plenty of Fish have you heard about popol
singles dot com. If you're looking for black guys, that's
a good site. There's plenty there's something for everybody. For
Jewish people, ball, I don't want to fish, Sure, well,
I think Plenty of Fish isn't actually about fish, but there.
I once put my makeup artists on a dating site
called shoot what was it? And it was for fishermen?
(35:11):
And it was it was misleading, and I was like,
I was like, why is every person holding a like
a bass in every picture? I'm like, who are they
looking for? Other fisherman? Like? Who are they looking for
female fisherman? And then I was like, oh, this is
a fishing website, Like this is for people who fish
and that want to meet each other. But get out
there and practice the exercise of dating, practice the exercise
(35:33):
of being very owning who you are, that you are
fifty seven. Yes, everyone's going through a weird time coming
out of COVID. I mean even people who have big
social lives. I'm assuming you do too, because you entertain
a lot. It's weird. Everyone feels a little bit off
and it's hard to get back in. But the longer
you wait, the harder it's going to be. So it's
better just to take the first step and then you
(35:55):
know it'll flow more easily once you get back into
practice and go on dates as an exercise. Don't even
go on them thinking, oh, this is gonna be this
great love. Like if he's not the perfect thing that
you're looking for, or he's not handsome enough, or he's
not thin enough or whatever you're into. If he's not
meeting your requirements, who gives a ship? Just start going
on dates to practice going on dates so that you
(36:16):
get more comfortable with introducing yourself, telling your story and
being proud of you who you are, because you know,
you just said a bunch of great things about yourself
and then a couple negatives. So just get into the
practice of saying more positive and less negative and no
negative if you can. I don't think it's hard. I
think there are so many people out there that are
looking for a partner, men and women and everything in
(36:39):
between on the spectrum. People are looking, and so you'll
be surprised that you know, you think you're alone, but
you're never alone. Martha and I are alone. That's loneliness. Yeah,
just be happy you're not famous and everybody knows your
personality before you go on a date. Okay, think of that,
think of that before you go on date. Yes, I'm
(37:01):
sure the everyone just assumes exactly what you're going to be,
like if you're on a first date for both of you, well,
I mean it's imagine if you go on a date,
like you're always presenting, even if you're not a celebrity,
you're presenting what you think that you should be, right,
you're not being completely honest about yourself. And then when
you're a celebrity, it's like you're almost presenting what you
(37:22):
think people think about you in a sense, like it's
a it's even more of a trick, and you're like, wait,
this doesn't feel authentic or real, even though as a
famous personality or as a like celebrity, I know what
people think about me mostly is true. Like I'm not
putting on an act. This is pretty much who I
am all the time. And I don't think you're really
putting on an act either, Absolutely, am not. No, she's
(37:47):
not putting on an act, and she's not trying to
pret she's not trying to impress anybody, that's for sure.
So I would just say get out there Okay, a
single white female. Let us know how it goes. Let
us know if and when you find love. We'll take
a quick break right now and we'll come right back
with Martha and Chelsea. And we're back with Martha and Chelsea.
(38:12):
Martha just taught me how to make an omelet, and
you didn't burn the pan. No, it's still stuck on
the side of the wall. We things got a little
carried away in the break. Sorry, well, Martha. This is
the part of the show where we usually ask if
our guests have any piece of advice they'd like to
ask Chelsea, or you can give me a piece of advice.
(38:36):
It's Martha. We can make an I can ask for advice,
or I can give you a piece of advice. Well,
I was I was lying on the massage table two
days ago, and I asked my messur about you, and
he said, oh, I really like her. I watched aller
shows and I know, I know we're pretty well because
(38:58):
he knew he knew you a lot better than I
knew you. And he said, how does a comedian change
there their acts so often? You've changed your act, and
so he wanted to know why, why you've felt the
need to change your act. Yeah, I just think it's
an evolution. Like you know, you go through different phases
(39:19):
in your life. You want to tackle different subjects, and
you also you have to you shoot a special and
then that materials out there, so you have to begin
again and then you like, you know, the hour. I
just shot my next special in Nashville, like three nights ago,
and it's a completely different set. But it's all about
It's about being single, starting in COVID kind of giving
(39:42):
up on men and thinking, oh, I'll either become a
late stage lesbian or I will just be single, and
I'll do that because why why a late stage lesbian?
Why are you attracted to women enough to know? But
then you were just becoming so disappointing that I just thought,
oh my gosh, they're all it is becoming unfuckable. So
I thought, I'm going to have to transition. There's a
(40:03):
mass exodus of adults onset lesbian as I'm happening. So
I called my sister and I asked her if she
wanted to get a farm in Maine together, and she said,
I don't want to be in a relationship with you romantically,
So I canceled that plan, and so it's kind of
my journey of coming out of COVID and then meeting
Joe Koy, who's my boyfriend now, who I've known for years,
but I didn't meet him online. He's been an old friend,
(40:25):
which is the best way to go. If you could
ever hook up with one of your friends, that's the way,
because this has been the most healthy relationship I've been
in and just the sweetest straight hetero sexual MEA. Yeah,
but he's Filipino, so he's marginalized, and that's why, like
those kinds of men I think are a little bit
more apt to understand women and the kind of dynamics
(40:45):
marginalized because he's Filipino. Well, he's a minority, so there's
a whole different mentality than being with a straight white guy,
is what I'm saying. Straight white guys are a little
bit out of style. No offense to the one sitting
right across from me, But you know, with the last
five years everything we've learned, it just seems white men
have a have a slow learning curve. They don't seem
to understand or grasp the situation that they have been
(41:06):
you're a generalist, Yeah, yeah, I am I mean it's pretty,
but you know that's enough. It's the generalization is true.
You know, there's enough men out there that have abused
their positions of power, that have taken advantage of women,
whether it's in the workplace, whether it's out of the workplace.
You know, women are capable of doing the same thing too,
but not to the degree in which men have. And
(41:27):
so I you know, I resent the resistance of that conversation.
I resent when men go whoa, you know, and it's
like there's no argument. Really, it's it's happens over and
over again. You're in a position of power, so you
are of a different experience, you know, but because you're
a woman running your own empire. But you know, many
women aren't running their own empires and have to put
(41:49):
up with men and and you know, telling them what
to do and what's best, da da da, and that
it becomes old fast. So anyway, changing material all the
time is kind of part and are so of being
a comedian. You have an hour, you work on it
for about a year. You do about a hundred shows. Tonight,
I'm going to port Chester, New York. You were, yeah,
(42:11):
oh yeah, I have a show there. Tonight and tomorrow night.
I have two shows there. So what part of New
York is that west Chester? It's oh, it is west Chester,
port Chester. Somebody said I have to pronounce it point Chester. No.
I was like, I don't think I'm going to do that,
but anyway, I guess that answer. Does that answer my
stand up question? I think from your monsieur, well, yeah,
(42:33):
tell him I'd like a massage after my show to
swing by. Okay, he's good. Okay, Well, thank you so
much Martha for being here today and helping doll out advice.
Thank you. And I'm just in awe about the questions
that you get. Yeah, I know, I know. Really people
are needy. They are, well, yeah needy. Don't realize that
when you're doing the kinds of questions and you ask Martha,
(42:56):
don't get questions like that and so long. Yes, these
are the cut down versions, Martha. Wow, these are the
abridged versions. Yes, yeah, thank you Martha. Thanks Martha, thank you.
So if you'd like to ask Chelsea a question, email
(43:17):
us at Dear Chelsea Project at gmail dot com
Oh, good morning morning. How are you, Chelsea. Well, we're
in New York City today. It's a beautiful day in
the neighborhood. Joe and I have been exercising, like to
fitness fanatics since we've been in New York City. That's amazing.
We have walked the other day, he walked thirty five
thousand steps. I don't know why I didn't, but I
guess Disneyland. I know he's so he loves it. You
(00:23):
know that little app, your heart app on your phone
and you can track your steps. And we rented city
bikes yesterday and we drove all the way while we rode,
not drove. I hate when people say they drove a bike.
We rode all the way up to Central Park, all
the way around Central Park. We first we got our
little bagel because we've been trying at different bagel places
all over the city so far. Yeah, I do, but
(00:43):
I don't know what it's called. So that's helpful. And
we rode our bikes up. We got a bagel, cream
cheese and locks and the whole thing, and then we go.
We drove a road through Central Park, stopped at one
of these little pools ponds. It was more like an
algae pond, but it was pretty We ate our bagel.
Then we rode our bikes all the way down the
(01:05):
West Side Highway to our favorite little restaurant, Grand Banks,
where we sit on a boat and we had like
a strawberry mohito, and then we rode our bikes all
the way back up town and it was just glorious.
I mean, New York City is just so much fun,
especially when you don't live here, like it's always a vacation.
And Joe has started a laundrymat in our hotel room,
(01:28):
so he does laundry pretty much from I wake up
and the dryers going every morning, so he can must
wake up in the middle of the night and then
put another load. And so you guys, actually you have
a washer in our hotel room and it's more like
an apartment than a hotel room. That we read and
he does our laundry and then I hear the washing machine.
He does laundry constantly, and then he irons it all
(01:52):
and then he does it again. He starts again, and
if everything's clean, but it's everything's a mess, like everything's
shrunk or tight eyed. So the other day I got
a jumpsuit out of the dryer and it just had
chocolate stains everywhere, And I was like, what the funk
is this? Is this like a tight eye situation that
(02:13):
you're trying out, like what he goes to hunting? That
would it must have been something in your pocket, like
a piece of chocolate, which is so me, you know,
to have like a chocolate nutcluster left over in my pocket,
Like so my modeled so gross. Yeah, so one of
my jumpsuits was ruined, and one of my sweatpants, a
pair of sweatpants was also ruined, and that one had
a big chocolate stain right on the asshole. So I
(02:34):
could definitely not wear that one. And so I told
him to put a pin in his laundromat and learn
how to fucking do laundry before continuing. And then he
told me that that's racial profiling because all Chinese people
run laundromats. And I said, but you're not Chinese, So
what how is that racial profile? You're Filipino? He said,
you know what I'm talking about. I mean, I was
(02:55):
going to ask if you said that he irons. I
feel like it's a known thing that white people don't
iron their clothes enough, like I am currently wearing an
unroned color. That's funny. Well, that would make sense. And
my privilege, like we don't even think we have to
iron our clothes. We could just go out looking like schleps.
I don't have to say at least my husband is
one man who I told him at the beginning of
our marriage, I will never iron your shirts if you
(03:16):
would like them iron, he died, Well, this isn't the fifties. Yeah,
I mean, nobody should be ironing anything for anybody else.
Unless Joe wants to continue iron name my things, that's fine.
But I would appreciate him taking out the laundry part,
because he's ruined a couple of my jumpsuits now, either
by shrinking them like they're too you know, some of
them you're not supposed to watch, just supposed to dry clean.
(03:37):
But I did send like three of my jumpsuits down
to dry clean at the hotel that we stay at,
and I have to say, I got back and I
just caught the number out of the corner of my eye,
and I said, what is It was five hundred and
eighty six dollars to dry clean three jumpsuits, And I
was like, you guys, that's not right. Even I know
that's not right. One of my girlfriends, she lives in
(03:58):
West Hollywood. I'm sure she was getting a stun in
Beverly Hills. She said she took several sweaters and two
blankets that you need to dry clean to a dry cleaner's.
She got the bell, went to pick it up. It
was sixteen hundred dollars. I was like, where are you taking?
She goes, oh, with such if your dry cleaner has
a name and it's not just dry cleaner, then you
(04:20):
should not be taking, especially your blankets. There blanket, I
didn't know you could dry clean. I guess that makes
sense dry clean blanket grant comforters and yeah, yeah, I
don't know. I'm just glad that I don't. I you know,
laundry feels good when it's done, because we've been on
the road now for like three weeks, the both of us,
and we have so much accumulation of dirty stuff. So
(04:41):
it does feel good to have it clean. But it
doesn't feel good when it's all different colors and different lens.
When you get it out, you can never wear it again. Yeah,
so you know, there you go, there you have it.
That's the crux of our That's what our relationship is
about currently dry cleaning or laundry. Sorry, okay, everybody. Here
are my up ming stand up dates. I'll be at
the Just for Last Comedy Festival in Montreal July, hosting
(05:04):
a gala Gala also pronounced as Gala. I am in
Vancouver August twelve, two shows in Vancouver. I'm in Calgary Saturday,
August thirteen and Sunday August fourteen. That's Calgary. And then
I have tons of dates coming up in the fall,
starting with Saratoga, California, Niagara Falls, Long Beach, California, Bakersfield, California,
(05:29):
Pasa Roblais, California, Wheatland, California, and lots of places in Florida, Tampa,
Fort Myers, Daytona Beach, Hollywood, Florida, and the list goes
on and on. Oh in San Diego and Riverside, California.
So lots of dates in California and Tucson, Colorado Springs. Anyway,
go to Chelsea Handler dot com for your tickets. I
(05:49):
will see you guys all there. These will be the
final dates of my Vaccinated and Horny tour, and I
can't wait to see all of you in person. Now
that everybody well most people are vaccinated and officially horny.
That's with three at the end, Katherine, just in case
you didn't know how to spell horny. Perfect. Okay, So
(06:09):
today we have somebody on who is very You'll know
her when you hear her. Her website is called Martha
dot com. The Bedford by Martha Stewart is her new
immersive restaurant in Vegas. Have you heard of that yet?
An immersive restaurant. She's got CBD, she's got a CBD line,
(06:30):
she has nineteen crimes, Martha's Chardonnay, and her name is
Martha Stewart. She's the founder of Martha Stewart Living Omnimedia.
It's the dream to have an omnimedia Martha. Welcome to
the show. Hi, It's always such a delight to see you. Well,
I'm so happy that you're here in my office and
(06:50):
that we can talk. You know, we've never really just talked. Yes,
we've interacted before. We've had some social media interaction. We
bumped into each other most recently at Jimmy Fallon show.
That was so fun, but I think it was seth
Meyers though, oh you know what it was, Seth Meyers.
It's so hard to keep all these men straight, Isn't
it very hard because you do get mixed up. Late
(07:12):
night is late night, and there's like at least three
or four of them that you have to keep track of. Yeah,
you know, and I was just your favorite. Oh god,
don't ask to ask me that. I would have to
say Jimmy Fallon just because I do his show the
most often, so I would say that, you know, he's
a real sweetheart. I like all of them. Is so hard.
I missed David Litterman the most. Well, you guys had
(07:33):
a nice report, and we we worked together a long time.
And now I think I've appeared on Seth Meyers more
than any other guests. That was a record for a while.
And now I don't know. I think I like Stephen Colbert.
Do you do that show? Oh yeah, I've done it,
but I don't regularly. I did Fallon more regularly. He's
(07:53):
a little more difficult, Yeah, but he's really smart. But
Letterman was difficult. No, No, I know Letterman had a
nice relationship. And did you guys have a relationship off screen?
I wish yeah, Well, because a lot of you know,
I was reading this Joan Rivers book because I was
I recently inducted her into the Comedy Hall of Fame
for Netflix, and I was reading a Joan Rivers book
(08:14):
and she was talking about her dynamic with Johnny Carson.
Did you ever do Johnny Carson show? Yes, yeah, that
was That was a hard show to do, That's what
she said, because everyone thought they had this great relationship,
but it was only for on camera. There was nothing
going on off camera. Did you Joan Rivers have any
affairs with anybody? Um, not that she spoke about in
the book, But I mean, I guess, you know, she
(08:35):
seemed to be like a person under herself. But I
don't mean narcissism or anything like that. Just she was
just so powerful, like her presence was so strong that
it would be hard to tell anybody else. But I
think she did. I think I wouldn't. I think I
eated her house once, and I think there was a
man around. Well, that's good to know, speaking of men.
What's going on in your love life these days? Nothing.
I had two mad crushes in the last month, which
(08:57):
is really good for me. Yeah, it turns out, you know,
one of them is married to the mother of some
friends of mine, and and I just he's so attractive,
but you don't you can't be a home record. No
I'm not. I've never been a home record, never, and
I've tried really hard not to be. It's hard to
have had the opportunity record and I have not taken
(09:18):
anybody up on it. And that's really where that's where
I meet men. They're all they're all marriage to friends
of mine or something like that. Well, it's very difficult
because I think there are certain ages we go through
where it's very tempting because you want to believe that, oh,
maybe this relationship that they're in is temporary, or maybe
they'll die. I always think, oh, gosh, couldn't that person
just die the wife you're not not painfully just die
(09:41):
and then But it hasn't worked out. No, it hasn't
worked out. But what I would say, I mean, I
find it curious because when was your when was your
last relationship? A while ago, not too long ago. But
while I go, Okay, so it's not that far in
the distance, right, so like a hundred years or well,
we know you're not a hundred years old. To Martha
(10:01):
nobody thinks that, and it speaking of you have a
lot of years ahead of you. But I would like
to know what, youth, what what do you think is
the most important thing in terms of legacy and leaving behind?
What is the thing that's most important for you to
be known for? Um, I would like to leave and
I think I am in the process of leaving a
vast library of good, authentic information for good living. That's
(10:27):
really It sounds kind of high minded and blah blah blah,
but it's actually a serious thing. You know, growing up,
I had the joy of cooking, and I had maybe
the better homes and Gardens house of a book of
household management. But I didn't have the Martha Stewart books
which are so phenomenally useful, and I didn't have the
(10:48):
ideas and the videos that we've created and produced over
the years. So so leaving that kind of legacy of
really good education, but also with a with a flair
for forliness and joyfulness and beauty, because I think we
what we do is pretty beautiful and all that information
we've created, that's a that's a good legacy. And did
(11:09):
you know when you were a little girl that this
is what you were going to be doing when you
grew up. No, Actually, I always wanted to be a teacher.
I was brought up loving my teachers. I was encouraged
to be a teacher to help little kids. I was
always doing the birthday parties and creating all kinds of
interesting things for the children to do, even when I
(11:30):
was a child. That started when I was about ten.
So teaching was always ingrained in me as a very
high minded profession, and that I could do it to
millions of people via television and via the Internet and
via magazines and books. That really has been fantastic. Yeah, yeah,
I mean it's really Could you have ever imagined that
(11:52):
you would have such an empire like this? I don't.
I don't think like that. I just think that. And
I just worked day to day and build and build
and try to try to fix and build and fix
and repair and build and create. That's how I go.
And what do you think the most influential relationships have
been in your life that have contributed to your sense
(12:12):
of self and your sense of success. Well, first of all,
I guess it was my parents, and I had a
nice relationship with both parents. I was my father's favorite
which didn't make me happy all the time, because I
don't think parents should have favorites. How many children six
the same as you? Yeah, what number are you? I
am number two? You were the baby, I'm number six. Well,
(12:33):
you're spoiled brat, and you got what you wanted, probably exactly,
but I got nothing that I wanted. I had to
work for every single Number two is a pretty hard
position to be, except that I got my father's attention
and none of the other kids did. He somehow fixated
on me, so and he and I were really good friends,
(12:54):
and I felt uncomfortable sometimes because I was he liked
me better than the other kids, and everybody knew it. Yeah,
they pretty much knew it, and I'm sure they held
it against me, and they probably still do. But my
mother was the egalitarian and she was great. She had
no favorites at all, and that kind of irked some
(13:16):
of the kids, but she was everyone was equal, everyone
got the share. You know. When my mother died, it
was so amazing. Her will was down to the penny
divided amongst the six children, you know, kind of nice. Well,
I think that's what a mother is meant to do,
is to love all of her children equally, because if
you ask any woman who their favorite child is, they
(13:38):
all say, oh, that's impossible. And if you ask any man,
their questions start to vary and they'll say things like
whoever needs me the most. You know, men love to
be needed. So how how does your relationship with your siblings?
Do they still feel that way? Do they still make
fun of the fact that you were the favorite? Well, no,
because we're I mean, my two closest siblings died unexpectedly.
(13:59):
The two youngest children died and um not not after
they were married and after they both had children, and
they just died from stupidity. I think I think they
were very careless about their health, so they did not
have to die. That's my theory, and I think it's
their children's theory also. So they've missed out on the grandchildren,
(14:21):
and they've missed out on the success of the of
their own children. It's it's sad, but they were they
were my favorites, my brother George and my sister Laura.
And Laura worked for me for a very long time
and George was a builder and he did a lot
of projects with me and two fabulous kids, and I'm
friends with all their children, you know, nice, nice friends
(14:43):
with their children, which is which is important to me.
But the other is my sister Kathy married a man
that hated me. So you know, we don't even go there.
We try to have a relationship, but not not a
very close one. Is this too much information? It's great?
And then brother Eric, Brother Eric, he's my older brother
and we've always been friends. And he's a fine craftsman
(15:06):
and I really admire his artistry and he knows it.
And he's older than I am, and he's, you know,
complaining a little bit about getting old, and I don't
I don't like that. I don't want him to complain
because he's a strong guy. And then we have the
brother that that brother, I guess every family has, I
know which one you're talking about. I have one of
those two have one. Yes. But he had a good
(15:28):
reason he went to Vietnam. Oh okay, So he is
a very good reason for being the way he was. Yeah,
my brother does not have a good reason. He did
not go to Vietnam. So I'll have to follow up
on that later. Yeah, but I wish my brother would
write a book about his experience in Vietnam. Those guys
don't want to write books about their experiences, Yeah, because
they don't want to talk or remember it. It's too Yeah,
(15:50):
and you know what, it would be so interesting now
in retrospect to know what they went through. I mean,
Vietnam was a hard war. Yeah, yeah, Vietnam. For our generation,
it was Iraq and Afghanistan. And we still haven't even
seen the after effects of what those soldiers went through. Right,
And kids don't know anything about war, that's the thing. Well, yeah,
(16:12):
and it's happening all over the world. Generation right now
doesn't know about war and the effect it has on people. Uh,
it's so crazy to me that that they don't know it.
And yet Ukraine is happening right now, and and they
don't know, they don't understand how devastating it is to
a population. Yeah. Seeing those pictures coming out of Mariopole
(16:33):
or any of those cities, you're just like, it's the
most senseless act of destruction. The women with their babies
crossing borders for food and shelter, and the children carrying
their little white kitty cats on their shoulders. Yeah, yeah,
it's so horrible. So to pivot, I want to ask
you something about your experience. What do you think is
one of your favorite things about growing older? Favorite thing? Yeah,
(16:58):
I don't have one, Yes, you do, come on, not
one because first of all, I don't think about age
or aging. I do not think about it. Uh, some
thing's happened to you. You know, you're your foot, you
stepping a hole in your rupture your achilles tendant. I
did that last year, and that was a stupid thing
because it's hurt me for a year. And that that's
(17:23):
the least favorite thing is is getting into any kind
of pain. Yeah, my favorite thing about getting older is
absolutely not one thing. And there you have it, everybody,
there's not one favorite thing about getting older. I thought
we would impart some positive wisdom from Martha's store. Not
a thing people. Okay, Well, on that note, we're gonna
take some callers. I give advice. It's just off the cough.
(17:44):
I'm not a medical doctor. You're not a medical doctor
unless you are a medical doctor. And I don't know
about that. But I know a lot about medicine. Yeah
so do I. Actually I love medicine. So Katherine, tell
us what we have in store for this episode. While
we have all kinds of questions that are right up Martha's.
Ali will take a quick break and we'll be right
back with Martha Stewart and Chelsea. Okay, and we're back.
(18:10):
And Martha brought some Easter eggs, even though they were
just they're not Easter eggs, They're just eggs from her
chickens who lay different colored eggs. Yeah, I thought they
were Easter eggs, and then upon closer inspection and Martha
telling me, I realized they are not Easter eggs. Well,
our first question comes from Heather. She says, Dear Chelsea,
(18:30):
knowing how much you and your family love Martha's vineyard
and that you go every year, I was hoping you
could share some suggestions on where to go and what
to do. My husband and are two year old, are
joining another couple and they're one year old at the
end of July. Staying in Edgartown one of the places
we should absolutely visit. And where are the best places
to eat? The more outdoors the better. We can also
(18:52):
find some adults only time without the kids stay well,
Heather m and I just have to say, Martha, you
may already know this, but in researching this question, I
learned that a very vast portion of the Internet thinks
that you own Martha's vineyard as as By the way,
all my nieces and nephews growing up thought it was
Aunt Martha's vineyard, and they would say when I'd say
(19:16):
I'm going to the vineyard, Aunt Martha's vineyard, they all thought,
not only was it my island, but it was also
I had a vineyard on the island, and that's why
I stay far away from Martha's vineyard. I don't ever
go to Martha's vineyard, so I couldn't offer any advice.
That's so that's a brand disruption, and she's got her
(19:36):
own thing going on. She doesn't need to be tied
to some island exactly. If you're staying in Edgartown, you're
gonna find plenty of things to do. Most places to
eat are the quarter Deck, which has like outdoor total
vineyard food like fried clams, shride shrimp, cheeseburgers, hot dogs,
all that stuff that you can get that's fun for kids.
If you go down to the wharf, there's tons of
places for kids, little candy stores, lots of shopping all
(19:59):
down on edgar Town, up and down Main Street and
around the Harbor View. In hotel is a great place
to have a drink and look at the sunset harbor
side in and then there's the wharf and everywhere you
go around there you'll find places you can't go wrong
on Martha's Vineyard. And then you're gonna want to go
up island too, to like see the more quiet parts
of the vineyard, which is West Tisbury and Tisbury and
(20:21):
uh the three main towns are Oak Bluffs, Vineyard Haven
and edgar Town. And then up island there's some really pristine,
beautiful beaches like in chill Mark and Menemsha. Those are
places you want to go and get a great lobster
roll and watch the sunset. Especially it's specifically the beach
in Menemsha, so you're gonna have a beautiful time in
the summertime. That's my special spot, Martha's Vineyard. It is. Yeah,
(20:45):
my family, we had a house. They're growing up. You go, now, Yeah,
we go every summer. You're really knowledgeable about Yeah, I
mean I couldn't even I've been going to Maine for
like thirty years, and I couldn't tell you all those
things about my island. I told you about my experience
in Biddeford Pool, right where I ran into the bushes,
and then I went over to Kenny Bunkport to the
compound and George Bush gave me a tour of all
(21:08):
of his artwork and then wouldn't let us leave the house.
We were captured because Barbara Bush wanted us to come
over to play pickle ball, and so I brought my
whole crew. I had my brothers, my sisters, like ten friends.
We went over played pickleball and then I hear the
former president go, miss Handler, is that you? And I thought, oh,
I can't be seen with this guy after all my
(21:28):
political you know, musing said publicly, I'm like, I gotta
get out of here. And then he dragged me into
his house. He goes, you're not leaving. He goes, come
look at all my artwork. And I had sunglasses on,
and he said I need you to take your sunglasses off,
and I said, I'm pretty stoned, so I think I'm
going to leave them on. And he looked at me
(21:49):
and thought I was kidding again, which I wasn't. And
then shortly after there we were able to skid attle.
But it was actually he's very charming in person. I'm sure,
you've you've Yes, I've met him. And when I was
in Kenny for two years ago, I actually had dinner
with Barbara's daughter and her husband. We had a very
nice dinner. The Bushes were away at that that weekend,
(22:09):
so I didn't get to see them, but I just
saw George W's wife in Texas, so I went down
to give a talk and she was the honoree. So
we had a very nice little chat. Yeah, I love
Barbara his daughter. Yeah, she's great. So, yes, have a
great time in Martha's vineyard and those are the places
to hit up wonderful. Well, we have one caller today.
Her name's Sabrina and she says, dear Chelsea, my name
(22:31):
is Sabrina and I'm twenty four years old from New Jersey.
I came out to myself as queer in twenty nineteen,
to my friends and sister in early and then to
my parents in the middle of My parents were initially supportive,
telling me they would love me quote no matter what,
but quickly became dismissive, pointing out men they wish I
(22:52):
would date, which was really hard on me. It took
so much courage to come out in the first place.
I started dating my first girlfriend in September and decided
to try and reach out to my parents to talk
about my sexuality and see if I felt safe enough
to come forward about my relationship. Long story short, they
told me that this was my problem to deal with,
not theirs, and that they did not want to know
(23:14):
anything pertaining to that aspect of my life. It's been
hard for me to deal with both the fact that
my parents will not provide me with the support, acceptance,
and safe space that I had before I came out,
as well as not being able to give my girlfriend
everything her family has given me, which is nothing but
open arms and love. Last I talked to them, they
asked me to write down everything I needed from them
(23:35):
and they would tell me if it's something they could
give me. I tried to make them understand why the
way they are going about this is simply sucked up
and doesn't need to be this hard, But I'm still
struggling to find the right words as well as a
reason for why they've reacted in such a negative way.
Everyone I have come out to thus far has been
nothing but loving, supportive, and proud of me. Please help
(23:57):
Sabrina and she's here with us on the phone. Okay, Hi, Sabrita, Hi,
it's so nice to meet you, by the way. And
Martha Thrett like, what I know, surprise, surprise, surprise. Well,
I'm sort of surprised about your parents. Yeah, it's it's
been pretty hard, I think, just especially since all of
(24:20):
my friends and like literally everyone else I've come out
to has been so supportive. I was taken aback for sure. Well,
other than going to Chelsea, have you gone to a
psychiatrist to work this out with your parents? Oh? Yeah,
I joined a support group with other queer folks. I
have gone to a few therapists. They all just teld
(24:41):
me to like keep pushing forward, keep reaching out, kind
of rip off the band aid, do everything I can.
So that's kind of what I've been doing. But I
understand she has a different perspective and ACROSSSS, so kind
of giving her time I think has been the best
that she needs. But I still feel like I'm not
getting anything back from her. From your mom, yeah, my mom,
(25:04):
I mostly have like the most emotional connection with my mom.
My dad is like the sit back, I'm going to
support you silently kind of person. So it doesn't feel
natural for me to like want to go to him first,
which is also an issue that that I have. Yeah,
I think what you're describing is just going to take
(25:25):
some time, you know, And I think you should go
where the love is and when you have a support
of welcoming family on your girlfriend's side, dive into that
and lean into that during this time, because that's kind
of the support you need. And you're taking care of
yourself and that's never wrong. Looking out for yourself and
standing up for yourself and being honest and forthright to
the people you love about what you care about and
(25:46):
what you want in this life and your sexual identity
and all of that is important. So as long as
you're being honest with yourself, then nobody can hold anything
against you. Those are their issues that they're going to
have to overcome. You can keep in contact with them
and reach out and stuff, but it's it's going to
be their own kind of journey. And in the meantime,
you know, you should focus and go where the love
(26:07):
is and just enjoy your time with your girlfriend, enjoy
her family. You can get things from them that you're
not getting from your own family. And I guarantee you
your mother will come around. You're her daughter, you know,
unless she's some evil, demonic wizard, like she's gonna come around.
She's gonna miss you, and she's gonna want to be
a part of your life. Yeah, it's just for me specifically.
(26:29):
It's been hard because I am such an EmPATH and
I do. I have a hard time moving forward with
things if I know that I don't have acceptance from
my parents. So just like me, that's naturally who I am.
And I've kind of talked to my mom about this
because she has been the type of person who's like,
(26:51):
I don't care what anyone thinks, Like, I'm gonna do
what I want that makes me happy. But that's just
not who I am. Like, if I know that you
love me and I care about your opinion, it's hard
for me to like accept that it hasn't really progressed.
But that's not an EmPATH. That's interdependency. An EmPATH is
just feeling what other people are going through. Relying on
(27:13):
other people's opinions of you is codependency or interdependency, So
those two things have to be delineated in your mind.
Those aren't the same thing. You know, and you're relying
on your mother's acceptance of you. Like, if every single
one of us had to rely on someone else's acceptance,
none of us would be accepted. That's the most important
in your life. That's your attachment figure. It's your mom.
(27:34):
You said you have the most emotional connection to her,
So that's why you're affected by this. I know it's difficult,
but you have to learn a way to move through
this period of time without relying on her approval because
you don't have it, and you're not going to do
anything to convince her to give it to you, except
by living your life and demonstrating your happiness and your
(27:55):
self love. You know, for yourself, you respecting yourself is
the only way to get a people to respect you. Yeah.
So she's also told me that she doesn't want me
to like come out. So I have a younger brother.
He doesn't know anything about this, and she's kind of
making me wait. She doesn't want me to tell my family,
(28:15):
which I feel like I'm ready to do, but I
also don't want to betray her in that aspect. But
now it's kind of like I'm getting to the point
where I don't care how old is your brother. My
brother is seventeen, he's he's in high school, right, What
are your thoughts on that, Martha? Do you I think
(28:37):
your brother is old enough to hear your truth. It's
your story, like she doesn't get to write it for you. Yeah.
I am so bad at things like this. If you
inter relationships interpersonal, I'm horrible. This. Don't ask me to
call it like maybe the alone. She's like, I'm just
gonna be in my garden. Okay, that's where I don't
(28:58):
have to get involved with anybody's personal affairs. I mean
in our family there every kind of person, so we're
used to it. Yeah, and I guess in your mother's
family there, she's not used to differences. Yeah, they're They're Jewish,
they have tradition. It's weird though Jews are pretty inclusive,
(29:19):
you know, of everybody, especially gay people. Well yeah, because
Jews are a marginalized group in their own rights. So
I mean usually I grew up in a very Jewish
community and they were welcoming to everybody. But you know,
you telling your brother's your decision. Obviously, he's seventeen years old,
he's old enough to hear it, and you lying to
your brother is really just paving the way for him
(29:39):
to be upset with you down the road for not
being forthright. And I think it would be in your
best interest to also maybe instead of talking to your
mother directly, maybe composing an email where you could really
write down everything you want to say. And that she's
basically asking you to lie about your truth. She's not
accepting who you're saying you are, and that's so disrespectful
to you, and it's really kind of like slowing down
(30:01):
your process of growing. And her opinion is never going
to change the truth of the matter, and that's that
you're gay and that you love women and that you
have a girlfriend that you love. You know, like that's
never going to change. So I think it would behoove
you to think about writing that down in a letter
to her and saying, you know, I need you to
think about all the things I say and then come
(30:21):
back to me when you're in a state of acceptance
and reception instead of reactivity. Yeah, for sure, I will
definitely do that. Take your mom to a therapist with
you if you'd go. I've been trying for so many years,
you don't even know. Yeah, she hears Martha say it,
Hopefully she will. Yeah, just yea, record this part of
(30:42):
the episode and just play it back to your mother. Yea. Well,
thank you so much, Sabrina. Let us know how it goes. Okay, oh,
thank you so much. Love. Likewise, thanks Sabrina, Bye bye.
You get some heavy stuff here. It gets pretty heavy. Yeah,
I just have to answer questions like how to scramble
an egg. Yeah, well I could use that information as well.
(31:09):
Luckily no one's calling me asking me how to scramble
that egg, because it would be one hot mess. I
don't think I've ever scrambled eggs without having to throw
the pan away after the whole man. Yeah, basically. Well,
our next question comes from single white female. She's fifty seven.
She says, Dear Chelsea, I'm fifty seven and still single.
(31:30):
I've embraced being single more than ever, and truly have
never been one to have to have a man in
my life. My parents divorced when I was three, and
I'm an only child. I swore I would never get
married unless I was sure it was right, and would
not have children unless I was in a happy marriage.
Well that's my fate as it stands now. I've had
several long term relationships and lived with two of my boyfriends.
(31:53):
My last relationship ended in I feel anxious about dating
and have a really hard time being open to any
one or feeling attracted to most men I meet. Trying
the dating sites, but I hate them. I'm pretty fit, petite,
and was blessed with decent jeans. Not to sound vain
or anything, because I'm pretty modest, but I just have
a younger look and attitude. I'm feeling embarrassed about being
(32:15):
fifty seven and being still single. The past few years
of the pandemic and living in a relatively new area
have left me experiencing more solitude than I could ever imagine.
I get in my loner, only child state and find
the idea of having someone in my life constantly to
be frightening and overwhelming, leaving a little space for hope,
though of course I know you don't have a crystal ball.
(32:36):
But will I ever find a partner in this world
who I can deal with and who treats me with
the respect and love that I want? Will this anxiety
go away? I'm sincerely feeling a bit odd and alone
in the world. My mom never remarried and stopped dating
in her forties, and I don't want to end up
like her. My dad found love at seveny I got married,
so obviously it can always happen, right, ps how is
(33:00):
too young to consider? I'm embarrassed to like guys know
my age. Even on some levels, I should be proud
yours truly single white female, single white female. Wow, they
really open their hearts to you. I know, I know
you are a trusted soul. What do you think about
single dom in your fifties, Martha, Well, she's lucky. She's
(33:22):
had a lot of relationships, it sounds like, so she
doesn't sound like she's in terrible trouble. I have no
idea about dating sites. I tried that for a while.
I mean, what's actually when did you try plenty of fish? No,
I went out with three different people, and the algorithm
doesn't fit me, doesn't fit you. Well, I mean you're
a special situation, Martha. I'm an odd situation, so so
(33:45):
are you. Yeah, that's true dating. But I found my
guy at forty six, So not on a dating site. No,
not on a dating site, but I was on dating
sites and I was definitely having sex through dating sites
because well, I thought that's what they were for. And yeah,
like there are so many. First of all, if you
really don't want to be single, first stop saying that
you're embarrassed of your age. You're not. You can't be
(34:07):
embarrassed of your age. That's who you are. You're fifty
seven years old. Own it. So start with that, some
positive affirmations every morning, being happy about that, the fact
that you're still alive at fifty seven, and that you're healthy,
and that you look good and you you're you seem
to feel good about yourself. I mean, well, she said,
I mean, I don't know how good she feels about herself,
because she kept saying she was embarrassed with things about herself.
(34:27):
She's embarrassed he's single. She's embarrassed he's fifty seven. But
then she says, she looks good, she's petite, and she's
in good shape. You know, she's okay. She's okay, So
go out, you know, just go out a few more
times with different people. Yeah, you've got to exercise the
muscle of going out. So get down those whether it's
match dot Com or plenty of Fish or I don't
know what the hell all the websites are now to
(34:49):
know about plenty of Fish have you heard about popol
singles dot com. If you're looking for black guys, that's
a good site. There's plenty there's something for everybody. For
Jewish people, ball, I don't want to fish, Sure, well,
I think Plenty of Fish isn't actually about fish, but there.
I once put my makeup artists on a dating site
called shoot what was it? And it was for fishermen?
(35:11):
And it was it was misleading, and I was like,
I was like, why is every person holding a like
a bass in every picture? I'm like, who are they
looking for? Other fisherman? Like? Who are they looking for
female fisherman? And then I was like, oh, this is
a fishing website, Like this is for people who fish
and that want to meet each other. But get out
there and practice the exercise of dating, practice the exercise
(35:33):
of being very owning who you are, that you are
fifty seven. Yes, everyone's going through a weird time coming
out of COVID. I mean even people who have big
social lives. I'm assuming you do too, because you entertain
a lot. It's weird. Everyone feels a little bit off
and it's hard to get back in. But the longer
you wait, the harder it's going to be. So it's
better just to take the first step and then you
(35:55):
know it'll flow more easily once you get back into
practice and go on dates as an exercise. Don't even
go on them thinking, oh, this is gonna be this
great love. Like if he's not the perfect thing that
you're looking for, or he's not handsome enough, or he's
not thin enough or whatever you're into. If he's not
meeting your requirements, who gives a ship? Just start going
on dates to practice going on dates so that you
(36:16):
get more comfortable with introducing yourself, telling your story and
being proud of you who you are, because you know,
you just said a bunch of great things about yourself
and then a couple negatives. So just get into the
practice of saying more positive and less negative and no
negative if you can. I don't think it's hard. I
think there are so many people out there that are
looking for a partner, men and women and everything in
(36:39):
between on the spectrum. People are looking, and so you'll
be surprised that you know, you think you're alone, but
you're never alone. Martha and I are alone. That's loneliness. Yeah,
just be happy you're not famous and everybody knows your
personality before you go on a date. Okay, think of that,
think of that before you go on date. Yes, I'm
(37:01):
sure the everyone just assumes exactly what you're going to be,
like if you're on a first date for both of you, well,
I mean it's imagine if you go on a date,
like you're always presenting, even if you're not a celebrity,
you're presenting what you think that you should be, right,
you're not being completely honest about yourself. And then when
you're a celebrity, it's like you're almost presenting what you
(37:22):
think people think about you in a sense, like it's
a it's even more of a trick, and you're like, wait,
this doesn't feel authentic or real, even though as a
famous personality or as a like celebrity, I know what
people think about me mostly is true. Like I'm not
putting on an act. This is pretty much who I
am all the time. And I don't think you're really
putting on an act either, Absolutely, am not. No, she's
(37:47):
not putting on an act, and she's not trying to
pret she's not trying to impress anybody, that's for sure.
So I would just say get out there Okay, a
single white female. Let us know how it goes. Let
us know if and when you find love. We'll take
a quick break right now and we'll come right back
with Martha and Chelsea. And we're back with Martha and Chelsea.
(38:12):
Martha just taught me how to make an omelet, and
you didn't burn the pan. No, it's still stuck on
the side of the wall. We things got a little
carried away in the break. Sorry, well, Martha. This is
the part of the show where we usually ask if
our guests have any piece of advice they'd like to
ask Chelsea, or you can give me a piece of advice.
(38:36):
It's Martha. We can make an I can ask for advice,
or I can give you a piece of advice. Well,
I was I was lying on the massage table two
days ago, and I asked my messur about you, and
he said, oh, I really like her. I watched aller
shows and I know, I know we're pretty well because
(38:58):
he knew he knew you a lot better than I
knew you. And he said, how does a comedian change
there their acts so often? You've changed your act, and
so he wanted to know why, why you've felt the
need to change your act. Yeah, I just think it's
an evolution. Like you know, you go through different phases
(39:19):
in your life. You want to tackle different subjects, and
you also you have to you shoot a special and
then that materials out there, so you have to begin
again and then you like, you know, the hour. I
just shot my next special in Nashville, like three nights ago,
and it's a completely different set. But it's all about
It's about being single, starting in COVID kind of giving
(39:42):
up on men and thinking, oh, I'll either become a
late stage lesbian or I will just be single, and
I'll do that because why why a late stage lesbian?
Why are you attracted to women enough to know? But
then you were just becoming so disappointing that I just thought,
oh my gosh, they're all it is becoming unfuckable. So
I thought, I'm going to have to transition. There's a
(40:03):
mass exodus of adults onset lesbian as I'm happening. So
I called my sister and I asked her if she
wanted to get a farm in Maine together, and she said,
I don't want to be in a relationship with you romantically,
So I canceled that plan, and so it's kind of
my journey of coming out of COVID and then meeting
Joe Koy, who's my boyfriend now, who I've known for years,
but I didn't meet him online. He's been an old friend,
(40:25):
which is the best way to go. If you could
ever hook up with one of your friends, that's the way,
because this has been the most healthy relationship I've been
in and just the sweetest straight hetero sexual MEA. Yeah,
but he's Filipino, so he's marginalized, and that's why, like
those kinds of men I think are a little bit
more apt to understand women and the kind of dynamics
(40:45):
marginalized because he's Filipino. Well, he's a minority, so there's
a whole different mentality than being with a straight white guy,
is what I'm saying. Straight white guys are a little
bit out of style. No offense to the one sitting
right across from me, But you know, with the last
five years everything we've learned, it just seems white men
have a have a slow learning curve. They don't seem
to understand or grasp the situation that they have been
(41:06):
you're a generalist, Yeah, yeah, I am I mean it's pretty,
but you know that's enough. It's the generalization is true.
You know, there's enough men out there that have abused
their positions of power, that have taken advantage of women,
whether it's in the workplace, whether it's out of the workplace.
You know, women are capable of doing the same thing too,
but not to the degree in which men have. And
(41:27):
so I you know, I resent the resistance of that conversation.
I resent when men go whoa, you know, and it's
like there's no argument. Really, it's it's happens over and
over again. You're in a position of power, so you
are of a different experience, you know, but because you're
a woman running your own empire. But you know, many
women aren't running their own empires and have to put
(41:49):
up with men and and you know, telling them what
to do and what's best, da da da, and that
it becomes old fast. So anyway, changing material all the
time is kind of part and are so of being
a comedian. You have an hour, you work on it
for about a year. You do about a hundred shows. Tonight,
I'm going to port Chester, New York. You were, yeah,
(42:11):
oh yeah, I have a show there. Tonight and tomorrow night.
I have two shows there. So what part of New
York is that west Chester? It's oh, it is west Chester,
port Chester. Somebody said I have to pronounce it point Chester. No.
I was like, I don't think I'm going to do that,
but anyway, I guess that answer. Does that answer my
stand up question? I think from your monsieur, well, yeah,
(42:33):
tell him I'd like a massage after my show to
swing by. Okay, he's good. Okay, Well, thank you so
much Martha for being here today and helping doll out advice.
Thank you. And I'm just in awe about the questions
that you get. Yeah, I know, I know. Really people
are needy. They are, well, yeah needy. Don't realize that
when you're doing the kinds of questions and you ask Martha,
(42:56):
don't get questions like that and so long. Yes, these
are the cut down versions, Martha. Wow, these are the
abridged versions. Yes, yeah, thank you Martha. Thanks Martha, thank you.
So if you'd like to ask Chelsea a question, email
(43:17):
us at Dear Chelsea Project at gmail dot com
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