Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:01):
If you would like to have us answer your questions.
If you have a terrible job, a terrible boyfriend, friend,
or a terrible throatful guess what you've got decisions? All right,
we are back at it again, giving y'all hoes some advice, okay,
or non hoes like me. Maybe you're a non hole
(00:22):
like me, But this week we are talking about getting
the ick. So we're gonna start real quick with this
letter and get deep into it. Vibe. Hey, ladies, I've
been listening to your show on and off since high
school and I love you. Wy the fuck you was off? Baby,
Calm down, I'll be twenty five in a little under
a month and I need some advice, so I'll jump
(00:45):
right in. I started dating this guy and everything was perfect.
He's a tall, dark skinned, handsome man who is college educated,
entering his career, family oriented, super considerate, big old dick,
the whole package. About a month ago into dating, I
found out that he doesn't shower every day. When I
(01:06):
brought it up, he said it's because he's a man
and has sensitive skin and showering often dries it out.
Nigga invested some set of feel.
Speaker 2 (01:15):
I'm not gonna lie. The sensitive skin tea would have
been I'm like, okay, I ought to believe that some.
Speaker 1 (01:20):
Set of feel okay. I had to address this twice.
It wasn't until I pointed out that I had a
bit that I had been avoiding sex with him that
he finally started showering more often. Trust me, I definitely
see an improvement, but I'm not gonna hold y'all. I
already got the ick, and I hate it. I love
(01:42):
everything else about him, but his lack of hygiene has
really turned me off. I'm trying to accept that he's
changing his ways for me, but it's hard. He doesn't
even look as handsome to me anymore, and I feel
like I shouldn't have to tell a grown ass man
about showering in the first place. After getting the ick,
I decided to expand my options because I still wanted
(02:04):
to fuck, just not him. I started dating another guy
who is also great, college educated in his career, family oriented, tall, brownskin,
and a gentleman. Plus the physical chemistry is amazing, probably
the best sex I've ever had, definitely the biggest dick who. However,
(02:25):
I suspect he might be a scammer. In addition to
his office shop. I asked him about this since I'm
from Florida and I know scammerdy. I asked him about
it since I'm from Florida and I know scammers, but
he insists he's not. I just don't have any solid proof,
just the gut filling. So here are her questions. Question one,
(02:46):
Should I give Guy one a chance? Or should I
cut him off and just focus on Guy Too? Or
should I just say fucking and cut both these niggas off?
For context? If it matters, Guy one is thirty one,
Guy Too is twenty seven. Thanks in advance, I know
you're gonna make me laugh. Sincerely, a hole stuck between
two dicks?
Speaker 3 (03:03):
Does Guy number one stink? She didn't mention him sinking.
Speaker 1 (03:06):
She said that, well, he doesn't shower, and it's made
her not want to even happen. I feel like she
didn't say it, but I feel like there's something there.
But there's something there that's turning her off. And it
might be the smell or just the clo I don't
want to lick you in your ass if you don't
go on two days without showering, like she doesn't give
me lick me ask? I mean well, it doesn't necessarily.
I mean, who knows. I didn't get enough details, but
(03:29):
it doesn't necessarily seem like she enjoys the fact that
he doesn't shower, and to me that that leads me
to believe maybe there's a sense of smell or just
even knowing psychologic mind.
Speaker 2 (03:41):
You guys are gross. There's always a little something where
you got to check them on it. But showering feels
like the thing they should be able to figure out.
Like I feel like a guy may not change their
sheets enough. You gotta remind him that. Like men just
be a little lazy, but shower, especially when you're coming
to see me or we're seeing each other. I feel
like that's a common courtesy.
Speaker 1 (04:03):
To be clean. For sure.
Speaker 2 (04:06):
I feel like you might have to sensitive skins. He
led with I'm a man, which means he just don't
like doing it. Gunplay just had a video come out
said that he ain't showering three d's because he an't
want to.
Speaker 1 (04:18):
You saw that. That's crazy. They put that on the
shade so crazy. That is insane. I mean, I guess
between the two you then okay, I mean clearly, for me, girl,
just keep dating. I don't think you like none of
these niggas, and I don't think you have to settle
with either of them. That would be my answer in
terms of you asking what you should do with who
you should date, I just think you should keep dating.
(04:40):
You're really not into either of these men. I think
even you thinking that the second one is a scammer,
that's gonna be an itch if you have a gut
feeling that he.
Speaker 2 (04:48):
Not just says college educated, but what kind of degree
is it? He's the Nigel boy is selling them bit
because if it's communications hone. I'm at a Nigerian nigga
who told me after four dates he did have read
he worked in it. And I was like, did you
always want to do that or like? He literally was like,
I mean I didn't want to do it, but I'm
now I'm so good at it. He was like, it
(05:08):
just you know, the degree fell in my life.
Speaker 1 (05:10):
What are some icks in dating previous men that have
got you to like not even want to continue dating them? Like,
and you too, boy, have been some previous X Like
for me, I'll start. I really don't like a condescending man.
So someone who is overly confident thinking he know everything
he's saying, but I know he wrong, and he's not
(05:32):
willing to change his because he just dead ass wrong.
That gives me an ick. And then also someone who
overly talks about doing something and his actions don't match up.
So like someone who's like, Ooh, I'm gonna take you here.
I have this really dope place and we a month
and a half in and you ain't done it. There
was a guy that recently did that, and I didn't
(05:54):
care how big his dick was, how good he a pussy.
I literally was like, I'm so turned off by you.
He kept promising to take me to get oysters for
a month and a half, bitch. They are a dollar
per half hour, So it's not even a money thing
at this point. It is the fact that you've said
that you were gonna do something multiple times and you
did it that I was just like, you not even
(06:15):
a nigga. Do you know what I think that is?
Speaker 2 (06:16):
I feel like when men do that, they just have
too many people in their ulster at the moment. I
actually think there's no other excuse in that.
Speaker 1 (06:22):
Like, right, it's just if you could ask to come over,
you could take me out to oysters, like to me then,
But that's what I'm saying. You're over promising and under delivering.
You're constantly saying you're gonna do something and you're not
doing it. I don't think it necessarily even has to
be a roster thing, because if you're constantly wanting to
see me and come over and do these things, nigga,
why you keep bringing up oysters? But nigga, you want
(06:45):
to come over at ten o'clock at night, right, And
so to me, don't even bring up the oysters if
you want a whole different type of arrangement with me,
because at this point now I'm so disgusted that you
kept bringing up these goddamn oysters. Then now I'm just like,
I'm not interested in even you coming over to my house.
I'm not interested in being with you because you you
(07:05):
a liar. Like I really don't like liars or someone
who's just diarrhea at the mouth saying some things that
they're not even trying to do. I don't want someone
to sell me false dreams or hopes or whatever the
fuck that is the quickest way to like, just give
me the ick. I will also say something else for
niggas with hair I don't care what you gotta do,
(07:32):
how good you look in the braids, the dreads, the twisties.
If I go to hug you and that hair stinks, bruh,
And I know you got dreads, and I know you
be keeping up with your shit. I love a motherfucking
with hair. But if we are having sex or I'm
laying down and your head and I gotta turn around
(07:54):
and your fucking hair stinks like, that's something that will
make my pussy prune up and dry, and I I
don't know if I even want to hug you anymore.
Speaker 2 (08:04):
I've actually heard the same thing that girl heard. I
remember telling a dude like, you should wash your hair,
and he was like, yeah, ruins the locks, nigga.
Speaker 1 (08:10):
You don't care that that and and stink breath, those
are my icks. You could be fine as fuck. You
gotta whisper in my ear and that shit is hot
and sank. I don't want you anymore. So those stank hare.
A lot of the scammer dudes have sank breath because
of the venears. You got to learn how to use them.
Stank care are for real, sank uh sank breath. Also,
(08:31):
the golds they use, I mean if you, oh yeah,
certain jewelry in your mouth, so stank care, sank breath,
and over promising and under delivering. Those are my icks.
What are some of y'all's ex I don't know.
Speaker 2 (08:45):
I'm trying to think of someone that came to mind. Oh,
I feel like I've met a lot of men that
try to.
Speaker 1 (08:53):
Tell me they're better than they are.
Speaker 2 (08:55):
Like, for example, a first date thing, they'll just start
telling me about all these book or some shit or
some great habits they have, and then you start dating
them and you.
Speaker 1 (09:05):
Never fucking see it. I don't give a fuck.
Speaker 2 (09:07):
If you read ten books on the first day, Like yeah,
just like be a casual person, right, we all read
once in a blue Maybe you're an avid reader. I'm
right in the middle. I'm moderate, right, maybe a book
a month. And I just find that, like, I love
when men are who are people. Even women too are
who they are from the jump yep. That really has
(09:27):
been an itck for me. For men and women too,
it's so annoying, like, oh my god, I work out here,
I don't eat car especially men that tell me they
don't drink. I've experienced this too, I know. I feel
like I'm on a roll with this, but it keeps
coming up. I don't drink, but then you have a
drink with me three days later, Like, what the fuck
are you talking about?
Speaker 3 (09:45):
Oh?
Speaker 1 (09:45):
Occasionally, so then don't say you.
Speaker 2 (09:47):
Don't drink, right, you don't drink often, say you like
to drink a certain settings, Like that's fine.
Speaker 1 (09:53):
Is there a way that someone can give you the
ick and you can get past it? Or does an
itch normally mean it's time to go? Like this girl
literally said she has the inch to where she wasn't
even sexually attracted to this man anymore. Do you think
there's a way that you can address an inch and
get past it? Or do you think that once someone
gives you an ick it's over for that person? And
(10:16):
well if you two, do you think once you get
the ick as a man like by a woman?
Speaker 2 (10:20):
Yeah?
Speaker 1 (10:20):
What couldn't your little women do that make you? Oh?
I have a list too, if you want me to share, So.
Speaker 3 (10:26):
I immediately I think about a story where I was
dating this girl. An ex girlfriend of mine had a
little brother. He looked at me like a big brother.
Speaker 1 (10:34):
Right.
Speaker 3 (10:34):
I had been broken up with this girl for years,
maybe like three years later, her little brother h hissed
me up, like, hey, I'm going through something. I need
to talk to you. I'm in a new relationship though,
so this is my ex girlfriend's little brother and I'm
telling the girl that I'm with now like hey, like
he needs to talk to me. I was always a
bigger brother in his life. I want to go do it.
And she was like, nah, I'm not cool with that,
and I was like, I'm gonna fucking do it, and
(10:55):
I literally broke up with her behind this Just that
feeling of control.
Speaker 1 (11:00):
Unnecessary oh an unnecessary controlling. I get that. I get
that this.
Speaker 2 (11:05):
Yeah, you an't need to be going over there and
have a Sunday dinner. But absolutely we make connections with
people that all the time.
Speaker 1 (11:18):
Now, this comes from BuzzFeed for the women listening, I
did want to provide you a list. This is from
men in which they say these are the things that
they get X from women. So and let me know
you agree or not. Okay, So this is what men
get the x FL can I guess, Well, there's a list,
let me get if you agree. Well, I don't know
(11:39):
the whole list is no, I want to see if
they come up. I don't know, double backing on the text.
Speaker 2 (11:43):
Let's see if text something about cleaniness and texting is
going to come up, and I think it's going to
be something with you said on the text, like just
like over over over texting like hello, and I think
there's going to be something about money and expectations.
Speaker 1 (11:58):
Let's see. Well, the number one is is no reciprocation
of efforts, so pretty much you know them constantly having
to text first, them constantly setting up the dates, and
you not really showing them the same interests. This one
is big rude and demeaning attitudes like aggressively rude or demeaning.
(12:21):
I know, like one of the things for me is
and that will give me an itck. If we are
at a restaurant, absolutely and you treat the bartender or
server like shit, absolutely, that is an inch that I
don't think I can look past. I don't think I
can look past that either. Another one which is really
interesting is a woman with no hobbies. People who cannot
amuse themselves usually demand your full attention, making you unable
(12:45):
to practice your own hobbies. Also, an overly negative person.
Absolutely not all days are good, but people who complain
about every detail, even if their day would be considered
amazing by most. Most are a pain that I can't
deal with people like that, you know, like where every
time you call somebody and fucking hell is happening in
(13:07):
the life, you know. I really believe that they circulate that.
Speaker 2 (13:12):
Like, for example, there could be someone that can call
my phone and says they just got in a fight,
and I'm be like, oh my god, girl, what bitch? Right,
There's another person that'd be like, oh my god, those
number ones.
Speaker 1 (13:26):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (13:27):
I do feel like that drama like finds you because
you enjoy it. It's something that just keeps you going.
And I think sometimes unfortunately, I believe it's a social
media thing. I believe it's a Twitter spirit thing.
Speaker 1 (13:39):
All of it.
Speaker 2 (13:40):
The camaraderie of hating things has brought out that negative attitude.
People just wake up angry after looking at something or
and then they push it onto you or they enjoy
debating all the time, and that's not a way I
like to connect.
Speaker 1 (13:52):
Ye same. I think this one's interesting because when we
think of dating, we think of in person. However, a
lot of people on dating apps and this guy said
that an ick for him prior to even getting on
a date with a woman is when their dating profile
is a list of qualities they want in a man
doesn't say anything about what they're like or what they bring.
Speaker 2 (14:11):
To a because I've seen it on the back end,
you must be a non smoker.
Speaker 1 (14:16):
I don't like this. I don't like that, and fifty
fifty fucked off. And then this is an interesting one.
This is an ick from another user. He said, women
who think they need to cut down every other female
they see. It's repulsing to bring up what a woman
is wearing, to bring up their TACKI hair or what
(14:39):
they're saying. Just to constantly put down other women is
also an ick. And I want to share one more
because you've said this. In another uh male that we
went over, a man actually said if they only have
guy friends, claims other women are too much drama. Coincidentally,
(15:00):
it's always involved in drama and loves gossip, always talks
about haters and fans. Who one said that, Yeah, it's
an ick if a woman, which is kind of playing
off what I just said. If you constantly just want
to talk down on women and only have male friends,
you may kind of be the problem. And I'm interested
by that. But girls like to act like bitches hate them.
(15:22):
They do, they do, they do, And I love that
mann noticing like, bitch, there might be something wrong with you.
Speaker 3 (15:29):
Sure you know, because at first it might come off like, oh,
like she's just that cool, you know what I mean
to somebody who don't got the wisdom, But then you
eventually learn. To me, I'm surprised a woman having bad
money happens is not on there, because that's that's gonna be.
Speaker 1 (15:41):
An ick for me in what way?
Speaker 3 (15:44):
If you if you like constantly putting yourself in a
position where you need money for me, like always because
it's like, oh the shopping always come first or whatever,
Like you're always doing big on the bill, and it's
like and now you have nothing.
Speaker 1 (15:55):
Left for yourself, like you still got shit to do.
Bill spread response financial response ability as an adult. But
absolutely turn me off from a man as well, like Nigga,
wasn't you just out with your homeboys? What you mean
you can't pay your phone?
Speaker 2 (16:08):
To be honest, I think excessive spending period like when
you date men with money, like women dating men with
money like sometimes they be it just feels ridiculous. Yeah,
and you're like, is this a show? Off for you?
Speaker 1 (16:20):
Is it for me? Like? What is it with girls?
Speaker 2 (16:22):
I can completely understand because we start our shopping addiction early.
Speaker 1 (16:26):
You know what I'm saying.
Speaker 2 (16:27):
Now Amazon has taken it to a new place where
I could my addiction is a clique that just says
by now not even add the car now.
Speaker 1 (16:36):
She brought up our our whorehive member brought up that
she expressed her ick with this guy and he did
start to change. Is there is there a like have
you guys brought up an ick with someone and got
past it? Or that they changed and you didn't like them,
or was it too late?
Speaker 3 (16:56):
Actually, every I've ever brought up they never fixed it.
And that's ah, they never fixed it.
Speaker 1 (17:01):
I think, Yeah, I'm kind of think wed thing that
I got fixed.
Speaker 2 (17:04):
I did think this one was. Oh my ex boyfriend
was old. Day was really not considerate of He grew
up Jehovah's witness of birthdays or holidays, which is ironic
because we talked about that a few weeks ago. But
the holiday part was fine, but the birthday part wasn't
because I feel like he couldn't figure out a way
to acknowledge big moments because it really wasn't the holiday thing.
(17:27):
It was like, oh, you don't know how to celebrate.
He definitely was able to step that up. He like
looked at it from a point where it wasn't me
trying to be vain and I need you to do
this for me more than he was like, oh yeah,
like I need to show up for you.
Speaker 1 (17:40):
I mean, I feel like that leans more into the
compromises and sacrifices than the icks. No, no, no.
Speaker 2 (17:46):
My ich was that he literally would not okay, like
Mandy I would write him, oh my god, we just
did this awesome, Like another friend would be sending me
flowers for something. My birthday would come around like things
were just not adding up, Like he didn't know how
to be excited for me, and I couldn't understand what
it was, which was why when he surprised me at
(18:07):
our show the thing that was twenty nineteen, that was
a big deal because I thought he was going on vacation.
He was like, oh no, I realized, like I need
to do that. I think sometimes I don't know if
it was in his particular case, but men don't know
how to celebrate women.
Speaker 1 (18:23):
When they're insecure. They don't know that they don't want
to give your flowers all the time. I you know,
I just read this thing.
Speaker 2 (18:30):
It may have been on Twitter where a woman got
a three hundred thousand dollars job offer.
Speaker 1 (18:35):
Yeah, no it was three times. No, it wasn't three
hundred thousand, it was three three times his money. So yeah,
just got a got a salary three times her man's salary.
And they were engaged. He gave yeah, they were about
to get married, and he was like, that would make
me insecure in this relationship. I don't want to be
with a woman who makes three times more than me,
(18:57):
and gave her the ultimatum, either you take the job
or we don't get married. And she called off the
wedding to keep the career. But I think that, yeah,
I mean I think she Do you think she called
it to keep?
Speaker 2 (19:10):
I would I really think you broke up with somebody
because you realize that wasn't for you, Like because someone's
going to threaten her and say, oh you.
Speaker 1 (19:18):
Chose work over, Yeah, get the fuck out of here.
That would be anck And I'm glad that she chose
to leave that mom. And you know what's crazy.
Speaker 2 (19:27):
You think about getting married and it's like it becomes
so we you know what I'm saying, like we this
we that like someone making three times more in your household.
Speaker 1 (19:38):
And you don't look at it as a WI when
y'all are to get married.
Speaker 2 (19:41):
I don't know if we discussed this, but I saw
a video recently where a woman said, if someone makes
drastically more like double or triple, they should be taking
on more of the bills. And honestly, I kind of agree.
I don't believe that for regular datings situations, but in
(20:02):
a marriage, like I don't know, let's just say you're
I hate bringing your name up, but it's only when
I could think of Nicki Minaj because her husband, I
don't know what he does, but like maybe he managed
this with sex offender, that's what he does. I don't
want to like bring this shit up, like but I'm saying,
I don't know if he's what work he's in. But
she's such a fucking you know, megastar, super rich, Like
(20:25):
why would you be fifty to fifty with this person? Like, yeah,
your money should be blended together. I definitely think there's
room for that to make sense. But yeah, like if
I was making three times my man was making I'd
be like, okay, baby, well I'm gonna put some more
and mortgage.
Speaker 1 (20:39):
What the fuck like, let me get the job. You
got that insecure? Oh you could have rode their way
before we get out of here. I did want to
go over the list of it's that women share that
they have about guys. Let's do it, and these are there,
which is crazy. Mine was lying over mundane things instead
(21:03):
of being direct for the sake of not being confrontational
men men who can't do anything for themselves. A lot
of times this is mama boys, but she's She's saying
basics like laundry, washing, dishes, and basic cleaning. So I
know we talked about having the shower. I agree. I
(21:23):
don't want a man who don't know how to make
a bed, do his own laundry, or do any of that.
And let's okay, cool, maybe you haven't made if you
can afford that, cool, But to just go without having
to do that, I don't know. This is crazy because
this is very similar to what the men said, jokingly
putting others down and then saying it was a joke.
I'm not gonna lie. I don't like that either. I
(21:45):
don't like someone who constantly has to be negative. And
then this is so much women, poor control over their anger,
cruelty to animals, oh, littering, and lack of respect for
the planet over your anger. Yeah, I feel like the
other ones are ship We all know you, like Doug.
Speaker 2 (22:06):
If I've dated somebody that's rude to fucking animals, people
like duh. But I'm saying like that was an interesting one.
I mean the littering was interesting because I don't think, oh,
I'm not gonna lie. I've seen men do that.
Speaker 1 (22:16):
I hate it. I've seen people do that same, So
you know, bring that up when I see that all
like casual, because I'm that that wouldn't be if you
have a pizza in your hand.
Speaker 2 (22:23):
We live in New York, so this is what I
see a lot. You have a pizza in your hand
and you dropped that plate. I'll be telling people right
in their face. And I live in the Lower East Side,
where people love to get fucking flushed. I'd be like,
you ain't see that. Josh Cat over there every time.
I'm man hates when I do that.
Speaker 1 (22:37):
I want to say a lot of these aligned with
the same someone being super negative, getting annoyed or agitated
and not telling me why, lack of communication, and yet
again on both lists are being rude to wait staff
for any service jobs that seems to be an itch
and a red flag across the board.
Speaker 2 (22:58):
You always wonder, too, how someone can do it when
we all know it's fucked up. And the only thing
I can boil it down to is pride and ego.
Speaker 1 (23:07):
I feel like, or literally, people.
Speaker 2 (23:10):
Know they're not supposed to do that, but they feel
very powerful because they feel like if they're being served,
there's just like I feel like that's.
Speaker 1 (23:17):
What it is. Yeah, but it makes you a ship personal. Yes,
I'm saying, where does it like?
Speaker 2 (23:21):
We all know this is something that someone wouldn't like,
and I'm trying to think where does it come from.
Speaker 1 (23:25):
I'm just I never have that kind of demeanor, but
I've seen it. I've seen it.
Speaker 2 (23:31):
When I'm out at random bars and people get too
drunk and they get like ridiculous. Also they're not getting checked.
Speaker 1 (23:38):
And here's the.
Speaker 2 (23:38):
Thing, men and women, when you're on a date with
someone that's doing something you don't like to someone else
when another person is involved.
Speaker 1 (23:47):
I'm bringing it up, why'd you talk to her like that? Exactly?
Speaker 2 (23:50):
Why did you say this like you have to? Yeah,
it's an embarrassing embarrassment for me for you to be
speaking to a waitress. I'm a woman and I'm fucking
what the fuck?
Speaker 1 (24:00):
Yeah?
Speaker 2 (24:01):
No, you know when the last time that happened to
me was an Uber driver got into Uber with this dude.
He was asking the dude to cauld He changed the
music and the guy was like, Okay, wait till I stop,
and I can do the bluetooth.
Speaker 1 (24:14):
So why you can't stop right now? Because he not?
And actually I don't want to hear the music. Can
you turn up one ouse seven point three? That's all
I want to hear. Whatever you got on now? Hell
now I do? What is the what? Yeah? Like Nigga,
Obviously that's the one. I think that's the main one.
That's the main one. And that is when you're right.
(24:36):
I don't think you get overseeing someone be disrespectful to
someone else. Because I listened to jab be by now
I'm turned off by you. It speaks to who you
are as a person in your character.
Speaker 2 (24:45):
Also, like knowing that you are taking some sort of
pleasure because people like to show off when they talk
down to someone.
Speaker 1 (24:51):
Yeah, and I don't like that, because who are you
shown up for that, especially if we're addressing that. Most
people do not like that because that's not the way.
Do you think that's for me? That's crazy you say
that's for me.
Speaker 2 (25:03):
You know what, I will say this to anyone listening
the most. I've met some of the most beautiful women
that are the most insecure. I've got homegirls with helloplastic
surgery that still hate themselves. Not homegirls. But you know, bitches,
I just know right. I will tell you that quiet
confidence men and women take you so far. I've met
(25:24):
some very wealthy men that don't act like it, and
it is so impressive to me when someone learns how
to not use the things they have or the way
they look to gain popularity for attraction or draw people
into them. It's some weird ass shit to me when
you start doing that extra extra shit and it doesn't
display power at all. I'm not excited by you. I
(25:45):
don't think you're masculine. You're really like a lame And
now I'm in the group chat talking about you and
how I just tricked on you for this.
Speaker 1 (25:51):
Dinner, but you we and you lame as fuck. Anyways,
if you have a question that you want to hear
us answer and the topic you want us to dissect.
Make sure you email us at decisions pod at gmail
dot com and baby, we will see you here next week.
Fill all your tears.