April 21, 2025 • 54 mins
This week, Chris and Karen discuss Donut Kings, being the man of the house and more!
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:02):
Are you leaving? I you wanna way back home? Either way,
we want to be there.
Speaker 2 (00:10):
Doesn't matter how much baggage you claim and give us
time and aid, terminol and gay A.
Speaker 1 (00:19):
We want to send you off in style.
Speaker 2 (00:23):
We wanna welcome you back home. Tell us all about it.
Speaker 3 (00:28):
We scared her? Was it fine? Mal porn? Do you
(00:49):
need to ride? Do you need to ride? Do you
need to ride? Do you need to ride? Do you
need to ride? Do your need you to ride?
Speaker 1 (01:01):
Ride? Do you need with Karen and Chris welcome to
Do you need to ride? This is Chris.
Speaker 3 (01:17):
Fairbanks and this is Karen Colgariff.
Speaker 1 (01:19):
We are leaving Karen's house on a beautiful summer day.
Speaker 2 (01:24):
I mean just absolutely gorgeous out here in Los Angeles.
Speaker 1 (01:27):
I just came from where it was still snowing. That's
a bit of a change, it is.
Speaker 4 (01:34):
You know, word.
Speaker 1 (01:34):
Choice is so important. And had they called global warming
climate change in the very beginning, yeah, it would more,
you know, there would have been fewer snowballs brought into
Supreme Court. Well of this snowballs in my hand, then
tell me again how the.
Speaker 4 (01:52):
World's are warming.
Speaker 1 (01:56):
But it is bizarre how around Christmas there's no snow
and now it just snows late. Yeah, and so in
the spring, the spring skiing was like a foot of
new snow. So I went snowboarding with my friends and
their kids and watch them all learn to ski.
Speaker 3 (02:13):
And hmmmm, thought pizza fries, pizza fries.
Speaker 1 (02:17):
Uh it is, yes, pizza fries. Pizza fries. You're right.
They were all bungee corded in pizza position. Oh, because
I think fries. Yeah, you want to avoid fries, you do, yeah?
Speaker 3 (02:32):
Straight?
Speaker 4 (02:33):
Yeah, well that's just uh, I thought straight fries.
Speaker 1 (02:38):
I guess dependent on how you throw them, they can
land anywhere, like that fun game making bacon. I believe
it's the board game where you take to die that
are shaped like pink little pigs and you throw them
down and however they land ones on top, ones on
(02:59):
its side, sometimes they're on each other, and there's some
sexual innuendo.
Speaker 4 (03:03):
Oh I don't remember the rest of the game.
Speaker 3 (03:06):
Okay, because that was so hot.
Speaker 1 (03:08):
Yeah, because I get I just get all sweaty because yeah,
sultry pig positions.
Speaker 3 (03:17):
Chris is in Heer's room making bacon again.
Speaker 1 (03:20):
Yeah, he doesn't even need the board. I didn't even
figure it out. I'm still trying to figure out the
trump board game. There's no go to jail on it.
Clearly it is. It is very much like monopoly. I
remember someone having it, Oh okay, and I'm like, ugh,
that guy from Home Alone too.
Speaker 2 (03:40):
I said, you know, the story behind that is that
he wouldn't let them use the building unless he could
be in the movie. So they wanted to do that, like, yeah,
he owned the building where that I guess it was
Macy's or something where he mcaulay Culkan walks in and
is like whoa, it's so Christmas y and then he's
there like hey kid, and he literally made them do that.
Speaker 3 (04:00):
Or he said you can't shoot here.
Speaker 1 (04:02):
Oh my god. If someone had just put him in
more movies, yeah, or our economy is tanking among everything else.
But that's the most current right now. There's a ticker.
You could watch it, yeap because he never got to
do stand ups.
Speaker 2 (04:18):
Yeah, he's like it's like he could have just been
a mediocre actor.
Speaker 3 (04:22):
That like odd at this point.
Speaker 1 (04:25):
Yet No, I was thinking about that with my dad.
Speaker 4 (04:28):
Who's you know your dad.
Speaker 1 (04:31):
He's just a liberal man who watches all the late
night talk shows, who watches SNL. He watches all the
new comedy movies and they are all all of entertainment,
all of art. Who would do Trump or Republicans really
(04:52):
even watch as far as comedy, none.
Speaker 3 (04:54):
Of it is for it, Gutfield.
Speaker 1 (04:56):
They just watch old listener Ray Steven Stevens or Larry That.
Speaker 4 (05:02):
I don't know what they listened to.
Speaker 1 (05:03):
But they can't watch any late night shows because they'll
defended Tim Allen.
Speaker 2 (05:07):
They will watch anything with Tim Allen, anything with Scott
Bak okay write anything with the guy with the Who's that?
Speaker 1 (05:15):
On reruns? I guess there's a new Tim Allen vehicle.
And hey, I love Galaxy Quest. There's been some good
Tim Allen movies when he is Santa Claus.
Speaker 2 (05:24):
Recently made my sister rewatch Galaxy or watch Galaxy Quest
for the first time, or maybe my niece, and she
loved it.
Speaker 3 (05:30):
I was like, this is a great movie.
Speaker 1 (05:32):
It is great. Yeah, it is great. So it's even
more unfair because we're enjoying their entertainment.
Speaker 3 (05:39):
I know. That's how it is.
Speaker 1 (05:41):
We get so much of everything. Once you turn on
a television.
Speaker 3 (05:45):
Who the liberals?
Speaker 1 (05:46):
Yeah that's liberals taken all the comedy, all the jokes
are for us. It was just I really do think
about that. Even movies would be triggering of you. Yeah,
you know, we're like compassionless religious person. Anyway, It's uh,
it's interesting. I think about it a.
Speaker 3 (06:08):
Lot, so Oxymoron what you just said.
Speaker 1 (06:10):
It is it is like military telly, military intelligence.
Speaker 3 (06:16):
What's happening?
Speaker 1 (06:16):
I don't know. I think my tongue started to swell.
I think I got stung by a spider.
Speaker 3 (06:21):
Oh no, right here in the car.
Speaker 1 (06:23):
Yeah, yeah, that's the only it's not because I am
bad at talking.
Speaker 2 (06:27):
It's no, it isn't you know what it is because
of It is because every day that Elon Musk continues
to call twitter x, more spiders come out in this car.
Just day by day, another rare, incredibly venomous spider shows up.
Speaker 1 (06:44):
Oh there is one time Martha Kelly and Austin a
giant I think it was a wolf spider. They're like
big and furry and they just exist. You just move
there and like plants that can cut your skin open,
you just are supposed to get used to it. Yeah,
And a spider was in her car and she had
(07:05):
just parked it somewhere. I don't think she ever saw
that car again. I think she'd just abandoned it, just
a good bye because we couldn't find the spider. I
looked in there with like a fly swatter. Yeah, spider's
in a car, that really.
Speaker 2 (07:20):
Especially those big ones, I mean those like a wolf spider.
Speaker 3 (07:23):
Those are the ones with the hairy legs. Right.
Speaker 4 (07:25):
That's how the world feels right now.
Speaker 1 (07:27):
It's like there's a spider in the car and we're
all trying to drive around.
Speaker 2 (07:30):
Yeah, feeling We're going ninety miles an hour on the freeway,
but there's a spider hanging over our head.
Speaker 3 (07:37):
Yes, not great.
Speaker 1 (07:39):
No, no, but I've been you know, finding ways too
feel positive.
Speaker 2 (07:51):
Would you let's share some ways to feel positive with
the listeners right now so we can help each other.
Speaker 1 (07:55):
Karen, it's very important. I know we hear it so
much that it's become cliche. You have to have hobbies
that you focus on so much that it distracts from
your livelihood. Yes, you have to take in interests, multiple interests, okay,
and get excited about them, excel at them, and then
(08:20):
you're like, hey, this is what life is all about.
Then you can be sad the rest of the day.
Speaker 3 (08:25):
Okay, I'm right to.
Speaker 4 (08:26):
Think about others.
Speaker 1 (08:28):
But you do need some selfish me time, Yes, and
what I mean for some it might be meditation.
Speaker 3 (08:35):
Yeah, give some suggestions.
Speaker 1 (08:37):
I've been meaning to learn how to meditate my whole life.
I just don't have the patience same, but I will.
I will figure it. That's just breathing and stuff. I
can figure it out, you know.
Speaker 2 (08:48):
There is like there are a couple good apps where
they do guided meditation, which is way easier than silent
meditation to me.
Speaker 1 (08:56):
Right, I don't know how someone would do silent meditation.
Speaker 2 (09:00):
It's just well, that's just you alone with your psychotic brain.
But right then the ideas you're supposed to go thinking
and then try to stop thinking.
Speaker 3 (09:10):
Yeah, you won't. And that's you don't fail or anything.
Speaker 2 (09:14):
You just notice when you when you're thinking, and then
say thinking again, and you just keep doing it over
and over, trying to do it sooner and sooner.
Speaker 4 (09:21):
It's just the.
Speaker 1 (09:22):
Whole time you're trying not to think of the stay passed.
Speaker 4 (09:25):
Marshmallow me. That kind of brain control.
Speaker 2 (09:28):
It's that level of brain control that no human has.
But it's the work. It's about. It's about the work,
so that you start to notice that these feelings and
thoughts are just clouds in the sky and they move through.
Speaker 4 (09:40):
Oh that's a good visual.
Speaker 2 (09:41):
M M.
Speaker 4 (09:43):
Okay, I will.
Speaker 1 (09:44):
But I'm the I am the person that if you
say clear your mind, I will think of all the things.
Speaker 4 (09:51):
Yeah, oh, you want me to clear my mind?
Speaker 1 (09:54):
Huh? How about a circus no one?
Speaker 3 (09:58):
And then it's right into like incubissing.
Speaker 2 (10:00):
Yeah, I wish I could do it, but I still
haven't fully recovered.
Speaker 1 (10:05):
Yeah, we haven't recovered from the past lawsuits.
Speaker 2 (10:11):
We get dinged by Incubis again for their beautiful song.
Speaker 4 (10:18):
Yeah, we gotta start. There's parody.
Speaker 1 (10:20):
Law All we have to do is make new lyrics
and turn into a country song. The other thing that
I if I try and clear my head, country music
will be playing in the background.
Speaker 2 (10:32):
Oh does that work? I know you were trying to
say that you wrote country music.
Speaker 4 (10:37):
I think I could.
Speaker 3 (10:38):
I bet you could.
Speaker 1 (10:39):
I think I could. Where's that guided meditation or online class?
Speaker 2 (10:44):
It'll be next? Okay, good, because you'll have to you'll
be done with golf soon.
Speaker 1 (10:48):
I yes, I haven't. I've been tapering off of the golfing,
but I will get back.
Speaker 2 (10:53):
Someone invited. They were like, hey, let's go golfing one day.
And I was like no, like never in the world.
But they were like, but wouldn't it be nice to
just drive around on a golf cart and like you
don't even have to play, but you just be out there.
Speaker 3 (11:05):
And I'm be like, kind kind of I guess.
Speaker 1 (11:09):
Yeah, yeah, not for me, I don't. I don't like
the golf carts. It's it's I want the exor I
want the tricking my body into exercising. And do you tennis?
Does that too?
Speaker 3 (11:21):
Are you your own caddy? Right?
Speaker 1 (11:24):
The caddies are a If you're in a tournament, they
assign you someone, but yeah, you decide on your I
have a little app that says, hey, you're this far away,
we know how far you hit this club. Hit this club,
it has measured. There's a sensor in the handle.
Speaker 3 (11:41):
Oh no, but I'm just talking about carrying and the weight.
Speaker 1 (11:43):
Oh right. I have a little cart with a little
beverage holder. It's got wheels and I push it along.
Oh okay, and then my phone is like, you hate
your seven. That's my caddy.
Speaker 3 (11:53):
Oh shit, So okay, that's cool.
Speaker 1 (11:57):
So you're in a cart with someone you've both hit balls,
different directions. Then you have to drive this little car
to each other's balls. So all of a sudden, you
don't you're not just searching for your ball lost in
long grass. You have to find this other guys, and
you've hit in different directions. It takes longer, I think
than walking. Okay, And people are like, yeah, we'll go
(12:19):
out get some extracise. Then they're in a cart, they're
smoking a cigar.
Speaker 2 (12:22):
They're just driving, making deals, making deals, watching the economy crumbled. Yes,
can I tell you a story I just remembered that
was really exciting as it was happening.
Speaker 4 (12:35):
Yes, very much.
Speaker 1 (12:36):
Tell the story.
Speaker 2 (12:37):
On my flight home from Chicago, which was last week,
I was like one of the last people and red,
Oh my god, sorry, Jesus fucking Christ.
Speaker 1 (12:49):
It's okay.
Speaker 3 (12:51):
I didn't know that. Fuck did I just do?
Speaker 4 (12:53):
It's okay.
Speaker 1 (12:54):
It was a left turn, green arrow.
Speaker 2 (12:57):
Oh my god, that guy could have absolutely he slammed
his garden of mine just because he was right and
I was wrong.
Speaker 3 (13:03):
I'm so sorry you guys.
Speaker 1 (13:04):
No, it's okay. Everyone saw it happening, including me.
Speaker 4 (13:11):
Jesus Christ, it's okay.
Speaker 1 (13:12):
That wasn't That was a minor one well, I was
in Montana, my dad's very expensive Mercedes. I went the
wrong way on a seventy mile an hour. In my defense,
it used to be a two way road. I've lived
away for a long time. They split them and have
one lane on each of the side of this little
town Arlee, Montana. And I turned into oncoming.
Speaker 3 (13:35):
Trapping Jesus, and just no one was there.
Speaker 4 (13:38):
Right, there was a car coming, but he is in
the other lane.
Speaker 1 (13:41):
It was a two lane and he looked at me
like I was crazy because he wasn't. I could tell
by his face he wasn't even born back when that
was a two way road.
Speaker 3 (13:50):
Yeah, but he didn't know what the reference was.
Speaker 4 (13:52):
No, No, I tried.
Speaker 1 (13:54):
I tried to show my birth certificate as he screamed,
oh yeah that it's okay everyone, okay, yeah, we're fine.
Speaker 2 (14:05):
Also, have I had one of these on Mike? Have
I had like a major mistake of I.
Speaker 4 (14:12):
Mean, congratulations, I made.
Speaker 2 (14:13):
It first, guys, I just drew through a red light.
Speaker 3 (14:18):
Luckily there was so much traffic. It's not like I
don't know.
Speaker 1 (14:23):
I'm surprised this car didn't make a decision like, yes.
Speaker 2 (14:27):
I do that you aren't supposed to be doing this.
I bet, I bet none of that's turned on anymore.
Speaker 3 (14:31):
But it's all off.
Speaker 4 (14:35):
It's okay, that was fine.
Speaker 3 (14:36):
Scary, yeah, scare me?
Speaker 4 (14:38):
What were you saying?
Speaker 2 (14:40):
I was trying to tell you through But Steve O
and I got so like into the Like we were
leaving Chicago.
Speaker 3 (14:46):
I was walking onto the plane. What if I did
it again?
Speaker 1 (14:51):
Stories about Steve vehicular homicide.
Speaker 2 (14:56):
So there was a guy sitting in the seat next
to my seat and he had a flat build like
skateboard hat on. It was pulled real low and he
has arms crossing his head down. So I was like, Okay,
that guy's trying to be low key. God bless you.
I don't give a shit like move so I can
sit down right.
Speaker 4 (15:14):
But then we all are on planes.
Speaker 2 (15:17):
Exactly like no one's trying to make deep eye contact
with the person that's sitting next to them where it's
like I don't want to talk to you whatever. So
it's like but this guy was kind of like down
and then just in this way where I just went
like skateboarder hat, who could this be? Which is the
fun game of Yah. Yeah, So I'm sitting in my
seat and then like the flight attendant comes up to say,
(15:37):
what do you want for lunch? Or I don't know,
whatever the questions were, and he's talking real quiet, but
his voice sounds like Steve O's voice. So I'm like, okay, well,
and I'm absolutely going to take a picture of him
like sitting like this to analyze it and see. So
I did that, and it looked exactly like Steve O
to me. So then I'm like, holy shit, I'm sitting
(15:58):
next to STEVO.
Speaker 4 (16:00):
Sounded like that, Yes.
Speaker 2 (16:01):
But he was trying to whisper, so he wanted is
that it's.
Speaker 1 (16:07):
Such a bottle?
Speaker 2 (16:09):
So but then I realized because our plane was delayed
literally like four times.
Speaker 3 (16:15):
It was wild.
Speaker 2 (16:16):
It was like it was they had this whole weather
system coming in where there was like a series of
tornadoes that were about to hit, and we got out
like just in the nick of time. So anyway we
had the plane had been delayed enough where like we
were sitting on the tarmac delayed. So by the time
it actually took off, I had to pee really bad,
and I was getting worried because I was like, there
(16:36):
is only so much more time I can be doing this.
Speaker 3 (16:39):
Yeah, and we.
Speaker 2 (16:40):
Were kind of like evening out, but the seabolt light
was not turning off. And then this random old lady
walks up like it's out of nowhere and just like
goes to the bathroom with the light on. So I
was like, hey, there you are, thanks so much. When
I'm nowhere near anything.
Speaker 4 (16:58):
Yeah, there's no nothing near us now.
Speaker 1 (17:02):
I just got up. I heard about oh a left turn.
Speaker 2 (17:04):
I heard you what, so straight just straight through from
a stopped red light you went.
Speaker 1 (17:10):
God, it would have been so great if we both
had Elon musk impersonation.
Speaker 3 (17:14):
Just read have you seen James of Domians?
Speaker 1 (17:16):
It's great. I like wearing the veneer teeth and I'm
not even sure Elon Musk has those mud its. I
he looks like him and sounds like him, and it's great.
Speaker 2 (17:29):
And he kind of looks like the MCB mac to
Night Moon. Yes, yes, like the chin and the teeth.
Speaker 3 (17:36):
And the eyes.
Speaker 2 (17:37):
Anyway, what a curse to be that being, to be
that being, to be that moon? Yes, so okay, So
so she goes comes back and I turned to this
guy and I was just like, I'm really sorry, I
have to go, like right now, and he doesn't turn
his head, so I'm like, now I know it's Steve
because you're you're doing everything you can not to like
(17:59):
interact where I'm doing something weird right now against the
like seatbelt sign right right anyway, I go up go
to the bathroom. Immediately the flight attendant is like, ladies
and gentlemen, please do not get up like I was
the cause of what, which I don't think I've ever
done that either, so you know, first times.
Speaker 3 (18:17):
And then I go sit back down.
Speaker 2 (18:18):
I'm like, I'm fine, whatever, and I don't ever turn
any part of my body toward Steve O for the
rest of the flight until the very end. He gets up,
opens up the overhead bin and says, do you have
anything up here you want me to get down?
Speaker 3 (18:32):
I look up and it's not seatbelts.
Speaker 1 (18:34):
Oh that's so great.
Speaker 2 (18:35):
I was so excited for like literally for hours, sustained
hours of just like I don't need to doction, I
don't need any interaction.
Speaker 3 (18:43):
I'm just here with him.
Speaker 2 (18:45):
I'm just like doing something next to him, and that's
great for me.
Speaker 1 (18:50):
It's so funny that I've watched him ever since he
was just doing backflips and skateboard videos and I know
him to never wear a hat, so I was like,
it's weird. He must have been traveling in a disguise.
Speaker 3 (19:01):
Well, now I know not to fall for the hat.
Speaker 2 (19:04):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (19:04):
Yeah, I think it's just like shaved head guy and
he's doing he's got like a big I think it's
hard to avoid the when someone falls asleep and they
draw penis on your forehead. That exact art is tattooed
on his forehead, currently a new one. So it's like
going back one yeah, back to the old day. I
(19:25):
thought he was like a guy that's gotten his old
controversial tattoos removed.
Speaker 3 (19:31):
But I bet he's not.
Speaker 2 (19:33):
Like I know he's sober now, but I bet he's
not the kind of person that's like, I should have
never done that.
Speaker 3 (19:37):
He's like, fuck it, right.
Speaker 4 (19:39):
Yeah, I guess.
Speaker 1 (19:40):
Yeah. It was all a life that he lived that
he acknowledges and doesn't regret.
Speaker 4 (19:46):
I suppose some of the things.
Speaker 1 (19:47):
I'm sure he does.
Speaker 3 (19:48):
Sure we all do.
Speaker 1 (19:49):
Look, yes, we all thought it was bad to slack
line over those alligators for an MTP A low union
paide job. Yes, you or Steva?
Speaker 2 (20:01):
Yes, while in that Wild Boys in Wild Boys, you're
in it?
Speaker 1 (20:06):
No, Oh, Chris Pontius.
Speaker 2 (20:08):
A lot of people confuse us, I love Chris Ponti.
Speaker 1 (20:12):
He is, Yeah, he seems like a nice person.
Speaker 3 (20:14):
He seems like the real deal.
Speaker 2 (20:17):
And also in the most recent Jackass looks exactly the
same as Wild Boys days. Oh yeah, yeah, like doesn't
you know many people age and it's been a very
long time, and he literally standing there like he just
walked out of Wild Boys and onto Yeah.
Speaker 1 (20:32):
Yeah, I think that. I think it's just luck of
the jeans in that one. Yeah, but yeah, they got
they fell onto alligators and they were snapping in mind
like it was terrifying little ones. But still I'm.
Speaker 2 (20:48):
Sorry, Like that shit or them dressing up his bananas
and sitting near silver bacerrilla isn't freaking out, Like did
you ever see that one? It's like this shit they
were doing was so unnecessarily dangerous, risky, and it was
as if like the way the producers did it and
made them do it, it was like, well, we're out here,
like it was this great thing to do. And then
(21:08):
it's just like there's a silver bag guerrilla and I'll
just sit over here in the bananic assume and hope
he doesn't kill me.
Speaker 1 (21:14):
Yeah, I mean from the beginning, I couldn't relate the
very first thing I saw Johnny Knoxville do is let
someone shoot him in the chest with a bulletproof vest
without out doing any testing of anything. Uh.
Speaker 4 (21:29):
And I'm like, oh, I can't relate it to that
at all.
Speaker 1 (21:33):
That's uh.
Speaker 4 (21:34):
I am not that guy. That guy.
Speaker 1 (21:38):
Yeah, because I did have the opportunity to weasel in
in the beginning, did you yes?
Speaker 3 (21:45):
And you said no?
Speaker 4 (21:46):
I said, I'm on a road trip.
Speaker 1 (21:47):
I don't have time to think of stunts, and I
don't think that what you're talking about is true.
Speaker 3 (21:54):
Because this is not a real offer.
Speaker 1 (21:56):
Yeah, and should we go to this place? Oh?
Speaker 4 (21:59):
Yeah, I like that.
Speaker 1 (22:00):
I like that.
Speaker 2 (22:00):
Ok.
Speaker 1 (22:02):
Yeah. Aaron McGhee he is an old snowboarder pal and
he was one of the beginning Jackass the TV show guys,
And he said, I gotta think of ideas. He had
a shirt that he made that with puffy iron on
letters that said Jackass on it. So I didn't think
it was real. Yeah, it seems pretty I have a show, yeah,
(22:26):
MTV and Spike Jones and me, do you want to
think of stunts? And so not really, as it started
to happen as it was already a show. I realized
he was on it and realized this was what he
was talking about. But even all that, and so my
friends always said you could have been on it, and
I'm like, I don't think so. I think he just
wanted some ideas. I wasn't going to jump in there
(22:48):
and say, oh, I'm scared of everything.
Speaker 4 (22:51):
Can I be that guy?
Speaker 2 (22:52):
Well? They do, but I mean, like, you wouldn't have
wanted to be the whipping boy on there.
Speaker 3 (22:57):
That's what a lot a lot of those guys.
Speaker 2 (22:58):
I'm like, oh, this just feels like high school pecking
order bullshit that I don't love.
Speaker 1 (23:03):
Yeah, I don't think someone with my anger issues would
have ended up being the whipping boy.
Speaker 4 (23:08):
I just would have been a really bad member at Jack.
Speaker 1 (23:11):
He doesn't do anything, and then he hits his friends
when they try and make him. Someone tastes him. Laughs,
You taste him and he punches you. It doesn't make sense.
I'd be the least favorite. No posters of me on
any child's wall. Yeah, yeah, that's I on my flight.
(23:33):
Similar thing we're taking off, and I did the same thing.
I got up while we're still ascending or decent, But
I it just is down to flight attendant. Like I
was like, I really have to go to the bathroom,
and she was like, oh, that's all right. Yeah, And
(23:55):
I knew it was not someone made an announcement please remain.
Speaker 3 (24:00):
I'm like I would have if I could.
Speaker 4 (24:03):
No one wants what could happen to happen?
Speaker 2 (24:06):
I mean, it's so funny. I know I usually have
that all planned or whatever, but they must. It must
happen all the time. If you're going to delay the
plane over and over, everyone has it timed out perfectly.
Speaker 3 (24:18):
I know exactly how much of my.
Speaker 2 (24:20):
Fiji water bottle to drink while I'm waiting, Yeah, before
and after, Like I just don't want to be trapped
anywhere where I can't go to the bathroom.
Speaker 1 (24:28):
Yeah, I'm designed my whole day to not ever. I
will dehydrate myself just to avoid that situation on a plane.
But I there was turbulence on the.
Speaker 5 (24:40):
Way in, and I thought I saw peripherally the wheels
the landing gear of another plane, a real John Lethgow
or actually in the black and white version, it was someone.
Speaker 1 (24:55):
Too William it was Shatner. Yeah, I swear I saw
a plane coming to the sud and we were having turbulence,
so everyone was already I make fun of people when
they scream and grab the arm of their neighbor, and
because I've gotten used to it to where it's like,
we're not gonna Yeah, I yelped, high pitched. I screamed
when I thought I and everyone looked at me. I'm
(25:19):
just so surprised that I could make that noise and
that I chose to be that panic. I don't know
anyone who's ever perished in a plane wreck. Well I
know three people that have gotten ask answer, why am
I not screaming on the toilet?
Speaker 3 (25:34):
You're screaming inside?
Speaker 1 (25:35):
Screaming on the.
Speaker 2 (25:36):
Every day you scream and scream inside on the toilet.
Speaker 1 (25:40):
And then I grabbed the arm of the person next
to me.
Speaker 2 (25:42):
I mean that's why I don't love traveling as much
as because I feel like everyone's on the verge of screaming.
So it's like that, right, You're you didn't choose to scream.
It was a reaction in a heightened situation. Yeah, like
that's just kind of how it is.
Speaker 1 (25:56):
Yeah, I really thought something was coming at us, because
that planes collide, that seems to be a new thing
that's happening, and it's on my mind. And I don't
know what I saw, but there was a thing that
wasn't cloudser sky. It was dark. It flew by. It
was the monster.
Speaker 4 (26:15):
It was John Leckow.
Speaker 3 (26:17):
It was the monster.
Speaker 1 (26:18):
It was it was Victor French hang gliding. I don't
know what it was, but it was.
Speaker 3 (26:26):
It was worthy.
Speaker 1 (26:27):
Yeah, it made me yelp or I went a act
like Kathy. I just did a high pitch. Oh.
Speaker 3 (26:33):
Then it was a bikini, that's what it was.
Speaker 1 (26:36):
Right, it was it was cold coffee. It was a
stack of paperwork. But yeah, it I do notice that
every time I'm descending into Salt Lake City, which is
a hub. You gotta go to salt it's lobbly all
(26:56):
been there, there's always crazy.
Speaker 3 (26:59):
Oh that's because the mountain range and stuff.
Speaker 4 (27:02):
Yes, and the Salt Lake.
Speaker 3 (27:03):
It's very it's that salty lake.
Speaker 4 (27:10):
Why would they get rid of it? Everyone likes stonnuts.
Speaker 2 (27:12):
That one too, was like especially glazed, like deeply saturated
with glaze. It was kind of gross to eat. And
I every once in a while, I'm like, I'm fucking eating
one of those things.
Speaker 4 (27:24):
Hey, when you're in your car.
Speaker 1 (27:26):
You can eat anything.
Speaker 3 (27:27):
Oh that's good to know.
Speaker 1 (27:29):
Yeah, and you don't have to stop when someone's looking.
Speaker 3 (27:33):
In or when the light is read.
Speaker 1 (27:35):
I'm in my car. Yeah, that was a special situation. Also,
if you're in your car and everyone starts moving, you
move too.
Speaker 4 (27:45):
Yes, those were people turning.
Speaker 3 (27:47):
Left, but that's why they were moving.
Speaker 2 (27:49):
But also there was It's the thing in LA people
the green arrow shows up and immediately someone hanks right,
and so thees and then I think they're honking up
me or that I have somehow paused, and that's and
also the car that was supposed to be turning left
also was didn't go right away.
Speaker 3 (28:10):
I don't know, No, I.
Speaker 1 (28:13):
There had to be something. I really couldn't. If we
were in court right now and I had to describe it,
we'd be in big trouble.
Speaker 2 (28:20):
I think we already are. I kept looking behind, like,
were there any cops? Did anybody see me do this
insanely illegal thing?
Speaker 3 (28:28):
But not in La.
Speaker 1 (28:30):
That would be funny if we just both got we
got pulled over, and the cops just we're just laughing,
What the hell did we just do?
Speaker 3 (28:38):
I'm so sorry.
Speaker 1 (28:39):
This is so refreshing. I love writing tickets for laughing
two laughing idiots.
Speaker 3 (28:47):
I've got for a while.
Speaker 2 (28:49):
I had a gift card to Outback Steakhouse in my
wallet for a long time. When's that episode we come
out all filled with awesome blossoms?
Speaker 1 (29:01):
Do you mean blooming onions?
Speaker 3 (29:02):
Yep?
Speaker 1 (29:03):
Yeah?
Speaker 4 (29:05):
Did you try and wash the ramen off your face
with chocolate?
Speaker 1 (29:09):
Yep?
Speaker 3 (29:10):
Yep?
Speaker 1 (29:11):
That kid? You know the kid, right?
Speaker 3 (29:14):
I think the spiral video.
Speaker 1 (29:16):
Yeah, she's she looks like a somewhat feral child and
she's chocolate all over her face and they're like, ah, why.
Speaker 4 (29:26):
Do you have chocolate in your face?
Speaker 1 (29:27):
She's like, I was eating ramen and I it's spilled.
And she's like, did you wipe the ramen off with chotla?
And she said yep. And I watch it. That's one
of those videos I've saved. It puts me in a
good mood. Yeah, that's my meditation.
Speaker 3 (29:46):
That is true meditation. Just just watch that for half
an hour straight.
Speaker 1 (29:50):
Yeah that counts. Yeah.
Speaker 2 (29:52):
I like the one where the girl is that can
I pit that Doug and it's a bear?
Speaker 4 (29:58):
Is that the original?
Speaker 1 (30:00):
Oh?
Speaker 3 (30:00):
Maybe not?
Speaker 1 (30:01):
I don't know. That is the one I've seen them
like that has to be from something else.
Speaker 2 (30:05):
Yeah, you're right, But the first time I saw it,
that's I saw just as that, So that's how I
learned it. But I'm sure the original was something different.
But it's so funny.
Speaker 4 (30:16):
Yeah, I bet that now.
Speaker 2 (30:18):
And it literally is as a little girl pointing to
a black bear that's trying to walk up to the
cabin and the mother's trying to pull her inside, and
she's just leaning toward the baron pointing.
Speaker 1 (30:29):
So good?
Speaker 3 (30:30):
Can I bet that now?
Speaker 1 (30:32):
Is there any chance that was James Corden that just
walked by?
Speaker 2 (30:37):
You must have left the country after that talk show ended.
Speaker 1 (30:40):
Yeah, yeah he got he got chased out.
Speaker 4 (30:43):
What'd you do again? He stole some jokes or some
people just were mad at him.
Speaker 3 (30:48):
I feel like he wasn't beloved the way he could
have done.
Speaker 1 (30:52):
Well, the way I even thought he was a lot
Like when they come and you don't know who they
are and then they're just confident. I'm like, oh, I
guess I'm this guy, but it didn't mark this time.
Confidence doesn't always work, you guys know.
Speaker 3 (31:05):
Sometimes it takes fifteen years to not work.
Speaker 2 (31:08):
Yes, this is weird because my ac used to go
in numbers. You could so there was low, medium, and high.
But then you could also just be like the numbers
were dictated to speed, so it was like much more precise.
Speaker 4 (31:25):
That's what it's an upgrade or updates.
Speaker 1 (31:29):
Because Elon muskits trying to get Americans to stop paying
attention to numbers, maybe we won't all panic damn it.
That's what it is.
Speaker 3 (31:38):
I refuse to stop paying attention to numbers.
Speaker 1 (31:41):
Yeah, if you ignore the numbers, everything is fine. Right now,
That's who I thought it was. James Gordon.
Speaker 4 (31:46):
Oh yeah, I know it's not him at all.
Speaker 3 (31:49):
That guy looks like he works in the costume department somewhere.
Yes he does, and he gets stuff done.
Speaker 4 (31:55):
Guy, he does.
Speaker 1 (31:56):
He's willing to run up a ladder before it's been
fully erected.
Speaker 3 (32:01):
Just to grab these two things.
Speaker 1 (32:03):
Yeah, he's a go getter.
Speaker 3 (32:07):
I just can't.
Speaker 2 (32:07):
It's almost that kind of thing where I'm like, did
I imagine that this used to have numbers? But it did,
and I just don't want it. I guess to always
be on. Also, onlys are you? Do? You?
Speaker 3 (32:20):
Do you feel any air? I could use a layer
back here?
Speaker 1 (32:23):
Do those mean that Onaliza's heat is being the seat.
Speaker 3 (32:27):
That's the first seat heater. But there I will.
Speaker 1 (32:30):
Say heat theater the rest of my life.
Speaker 3 (32:34):
Did I say heat.
Speaker 4 (32:35):
Because I said heat?
Speaker 1 (32:37):
Getting seat?
Speaker 3 (32:38):
We can roll the tape back.
Speaker 1 (32:40):
Those look like seat lines because the wiggly lines.
Speaker 2 (32:46):
Right?
Speaker 1 (32:47):
Do do do?
Speaker 3 (32:48):
But like I need not just heat, but where to
put a c all off? No?
Speaker 2 (32:55):
No, no, no no, okay do you know that? My
friend Kiaren Irnerson used to do that, Like in just
a hot summer day. She would turn my seater on
and I didn't know it, and then I would suddenly
be in a bad mood and be like, I don't care,
we can, I don't care if we go, and she'd
be like are you mad?
Speaker 3 (33:15):
And I'd be like and then I'd be like, god,
damn it. My ass would just be really hot.
Speaker 1 (33:19):
Wow. She's like, that's a comedic genius. She should have
been on Jackass.
Speaker 3 (33:25):
She's a girl, Steve O.
Speaker 1 (33:26):
That's the more subtle pranks where they all just get
kind of grumpy. Yeah, surprise, I put an itching powder
in your shorts. You didn't see just itch it should up.
I'm sorry I didn't become a jackass with you.
Speaker 2 (33:43):
Aaron mcgheehee you need to send him a card.
Speaker 4 (33:47):
No, Like those guys are all limp and they all.
Speaker 3 (33:49):
They're all hurt and their feelings are hurt.
Speaker 1 (33:52):
Their feelings are hurt. I've been realizing for years. I
you know, because of the app with uber and left,
they don't really care if their drivers make money. But
it turns out they only make money off our tips
and they never get twenty percent because they give you.
Speaker 4 (34:10):
Do you want to give one or three or five?
Speaker 1 (34:12):
I think that's another thing where it used to be
a percentage.
Speaker 4 (34:17):
Yes, some updates.
Speaker 2 (34:18):
I've seen both, and maybe sometimes it's like it's the
number one. The price is lower, like the total is lower,
so they're not going to percentage something low, just like
how about two bucks?
Speaker 1 (34:30):
And I know it's expensive right now, but everyone, we've
got to start giving these drivers twenty percent.
Speaker 3 (34:35):
That's all I'm saying minimum.
Speaker 2 (34:37):
Yeah at least, well that's what cleared my guilt when
because people are like, it's such a that kind of
gig work sucks and you shouldn't order from there, and
it's like, no, no order from there, and just give
them a fucking fifty percent tip if you can't, like
if you have the money to be ordering and having
people bring you fucking McDonald's Karen kilgear. Then you give them,
(34:58):
you reward them for that. Not I was like, yeah,
that's what I'm owed. It's just like, no, you the
other day. Who could it be my sister?
Speaker 4 (35:07):
Oh it is podcasting time every day.
Speaker 1 (35:11):
It's not.
Speaker 4 (35:11):
Maybe you just talk to your sister every day, which
is great.
Speaker 3 (35:14):
They both work.
Speaker 1 (35:16):
Oh right, Oh, it was so good. It was really good.
We're just talking about tipping your drivers and the and
the got it back. Yeah.
Speaker 3 (35:31):
Here's the big thing I like to do lately.
Speaker 2 (35:34):
If I order Postmates or Uber Eats or whatever at work,
I forget to change the address when I'm home, and
then the food I order it and so very much
neat at the end of the day is delivered to
basically the Bourbon Airport and nowhere near my house.
Speaker 3 (35:51):
And then I have.
Speaker 2 (35:51):
To talk to the driver who I just did that
to and be like, hey, either I'll cancel this or
you can bring it to me, Like this is my
fault and you're just sitting outside an empty building, right.
The last guy that did it, it was on Saturday morning,
and I was like, don't worry about it, I'll cancel it.
Enjoy the coffee, is like my fault. And he was like, no, no,
(36:13):
hold on, I just have to like put you know,
give me the other address I'll put it in or whatever.
So he drives basically from right down the street from
my house.
Speaker 3 (36:24):
I'm not going to do it.
Speaker 1 (36:25):
No, no, let's play it real, say.
Speaker 3 (36:28):
Not rush that red.
Speaker 2 (36:30):
So he picks up the coffee from two minutes away
from my house, drives it fifteen minutes away from my house,
and drives it back fifteen minutes to my house and.
Speaker 3 (36:40):
Drops it off.
Speaker 2 (36:41):
So I walked outside because he was also having a
hard time finding the house. Oh great, and I just
walked outside and gave him twenty more bucks because he
already had a tip. But I was just like, you
did not have to do this, and it was so
nice of you.
Speaker 4 (36:52):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (36:53):
I had the opposite where I the girl I seeing
at the time, I had accidentally and this is when
I lived all the way in Venice. We ordered food
and it was sent to her house across the city
and the guy called I can't find the door. I
meant Vermont and I was like, oh my gosh, I'm
(37:14):
so sorry. You can cancel the order. And he's like no, no,
where do you live? And I could tell you it's pissed. Yeah,
Like I'm all the way in Venice Beach. He's like, okay,
I'll be there, and he drove. It took a half hour.
And when he arrived though, he knocked on the door
and it was of course, taco bell was in a bag.
(37:34):
He threw it at me and walked away. So I
didn't even have the chance. He wanted to do that
and not give me the chance to tip, but no, no, no,
And he was dressed like Freddy Krueger. He had this
scary he had a hat on with a long bill
dude and a striped gray and red sweater. But it
(37:55):
was not Halloween, and he was a big angry kid.
He was like a He looked like he beat me up.
So I was like, okay, he's upset. I'm gonna go
out there with some cash. So I grabbed like fifteen
bucks and I went out and he was pissing on
the side of my house because it was a long
drive christ and I was like, oh, I'll wait till
(38:19):
you're done. I was just gonna give you some money.
I'm sorry that it and then it ended fine. He realized, Oh,
I was mean to that guy and I peed on
his house and he still gave me a tip.
Speaker 4 (38:29):
Maybe I shouldn't be such a jokey.
Speaker 3 (38:31):
Maybe I should fucking relax Freddy Kruger style.
Speaker 1 (38:33):
Yeah. I think that was his last day doing that.
But my Uber driver, it tells you how many rides
they've given. She had given close to eighteen thousand rides
Jesus Christ. And I was like, she seemed like a
young person to me.
Speaker 4 (38:48):
I felt like.
Speaker 1 (38:50):
There wasn't enough time in her life to do that
many rides. And I was like, it says you've done
seventeen thousand rides. She's like, oh really, Yeah, wouldn't surprise me.
Really was not enjoying it anymore. Yeah, and I did
that thing. They used to be smart. But this is
(39:10):
for anyone that flies to Lax that my go to
move was to walk out and go to those hotels.
Speaker 4 (39:16):
If I just have small bags, why not.
Speaker 1 (39:18):
It's several it's cheaper by dozens of dollars, and.
Speaker 3 (39:22):
The weight is so much less, like a whole hack.
Speaker 1 (39:26):
Well, things have changed, and every block I walked away
from the airport it increased. I don't know if it
was because I was approaching five o'clock rush hour, but
I walked at least half a mile to pay the
exact same price and wait much longer than I would
have at the airport where all the cars are hovering.
Speaker 3 (39:46):
So never do that again.
Speaker 1 (39:47):
I will never do it again. It used to be
my little hack. Just walk, go for a nice walk.
You've been sitting, get some blood flown in the legs.
Speaker 2 (39:57):
No, it was.
Speaker 3 (40:00):
But my question is, was this recently yesterday? Oh shit?
Speaker 1 (40:06):
Yeah? Okay, And the last time I did it it
worked great. It was like thirty dollars cheaper.
Speaker 4 (40:13):
So yes, they've.
Speaker 1 (40:15):
Changed some things. Everything is kind of terrible right now.
But just dive into those hobbies.
Speaker 2 (40:23):
Everyone, And my new hobby is driving through a red
light for no reason.
Speaker 1 (40:29):
You're so good at it. I think I saw your
first time. Jesus correct, No, it was.
Speaker 4 (40:36):
I know how you feel. I don't.
Speaker 1 (40:38):
I'm not a mistake maker. I'm not a fumbler. I'm
not a dropper. I don't drop things. I don't trip
When I do and people see it, I can't stop
talking about it for a week because I don't. That's
the one the one thing I'm proud of. It is
the only thing I'm proud of my ability did.
Speaker 2 (40:58):
Not because you feel like I don't know. I feel
like I just don't. I'm not trying to. I feel
like so many people that drive in Los Angeles like,
let me get up there, and it's like I learned
long ago where you're just like, we're all going to
be between these lights for as long as it takes.
Speaker 1 (41:16):
Don't rush yeah for a minute in that intersection, you
look like the impatient Tesla lady yes, and you don't
want to be here.
Speaker 2 (41:23):
And that hilarious teen from Campbell Hall with the big
flof of hair who literally was like put his hand
like you gotta be kidding me where it's like, I'm
not choosing to drive into your car.
Speaker 3 (41:37):
I didn't realize what was happening.
Speaker 1 (41:39):
Wait, when what's you? We've talked of this. Who's the
teen from the hall?
Speaker 2 (41:45):
The guy that was making the left to me look
like a teenager and he did this thing like what
are you doing where it's like, yeah, I'm making a
gigantic mistake.
Speaker 1 (41:54):
I just blacked out. I just saw a white light
and I knew something what's happening?
Speaker 3 (42:00):
Like this is it? This is where I die on
Laurel Canyon and more.
Speaker 1 (42:06):
In the middle of a conversation where it's talking about
things that make you feel better about life.
Speaker 2 (42:13):
We really tried our best, and then I drove us
into the darkness.
Speaker 1 (42:17):
Hey, if you're still wanting a donut, there's always.
Speaker 3 (42:22):
Randy you know. Have you had those? There's the fucking
so good Yes, that's the big one from the.
Speaker 1 (42:28):
Report, right, Okay, and there's several of those donuts on buildings.
I think Randy's is all over the place. I think
so too is Randy's. There's a documentary that I haven't
seen yet that I heard. It's great about all the
Korean folks that moved and just took over the donut
in history in Los Angeles. I go really really good. Yeah,
(42:49):
I need to remit. I think it's called Donut King.
Speaker 3 (42:51):
Oh I want to see that.
Speaker 2 (42:52):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (42:52):
Yeah, but there are there are guys like Randy that
have multiple donut places. It's it's like you get into it,
you guys. If you've been thinking about getting into the
donut racket, join in. Yeah. The city's built on donuts.
Speaker 3 (43:12):
Randy's donuts.
Speaker 2 (43:13):
Somebody brought a box with those donuts and they're just classic,
like those airy, beautiful, fresh, well.
Speaker 1 (43:21):
Made the donuts we want, not the big, chunky ones
with bacon and.
Speaker 3 (43:25):
Fucking Captain crunch sick.
Speaker 1 (43:27):
Come on, David Portland, Yeah you with your voodoo that
you all do so well.
Speaker 3 (43:35):
Yeah we love you Portland.
Speaker 1 (43:36):
Yes we do.
Speaker 4 (43:38):
I love that city, but come on with your donuts.
Speaker 3 (43:42):
We can't keep eating these fucking donuts.
Speaker 1 (43:45):
We get super opinionated about donuts like New Yorkers and
they're crushed. Oh, we have to talk about pizza again.
But then you eat the pizza and you're like, oh,
I see what you're saying.
Speaker 3 (43:55):
You're like, holy shit, where'd you get this pizza?
Speaker 1 (43:57):
Yeah it's New York like they Okay, I don't want
to talk about it.
Speaker 4 (44:01):
Just let me have another.
Speaker 3 (44:02):
Safe I do want to talk about it and eat it?
Speaker 1 (44:04):
Yeah, I do.
Speaker 4 (44:06):
God, why are we hungry right now?
Speaker 3 (44:08):
I mean?
Speaker 4 (44:11):
Are we?
Speaker 1 (44:12):
Did we ever type in our guests for the next episode.
Don't get excited everyone.
Speaker 2 (44:17):
Yeah, we're not even talking about you are Do you
know where where you're going?
Speaker 3 (44:23):
Generally? But yeah, yeah, okay, but not really.
Speaker 4 (44:26):
I generally am lost. We're I could type.
Speaker 3 (44:28):
It in, but we're generally right now? How close are
we on Le's pretty close.
Speaker 1 (44:35):
Yeah, I'm gonna I'm gonna just do my Do.
Speaker 3 (44:37):
You want to talk about Alaska for a little bit.
Speaker 1 (44:39):
Oh, thank you for reminding me what a thoughtful lot
I have shows in Alaska.
Speaker 3 (44:44):
I'm your good friend.
Speaker 4 (44:46):
Yes, thank you for being my good friend.
Speaker 3 (44:48):
You're welcome, my good friend.
Speaker 1 (44:50):
I am coming to Alaska friendless too, Fairbanks, where I
have done a little research.
Speaker 4 (44:56):
I'm related and it's coming.
Speaker 1 (44:59):
To Yes, it's called my coming Back Home shows, even
though I've never been there, and it's Alaska, Fairbanks, Alaska
the twenty third through the twenty sixth.
Speaker 4 (45:11):
I'm excited about.
Speaker 1 (45:12):
It because I'm doing a little a pub and then
another little pub, and then I'm doing like their main theater,
so it ramps up like like Maria Bamford's special Hell yeah, no, Yeah,
she did one where she's like just telling jokes to
her husband, then some friends outside of her house, then
at a bowling alley. Have you seen that one? Yeah?
(45:34):
And then eventually it's in like a music venue theater,
and then it's like a big theater at the end.
Speaker 4 (45:41):
And it's great because.
Speaker 1 (45:43):
You see how a comic and how Maria approaches actually
for her she just is who she is no matter
who's there. But you could tell there was like a
level of it's pretty rad to do stand up for
just three people on a bench.
Speaker 4 (46:03):
Yeah, but it was working and it's great.
Speaker 2 (46:05):
Well, and she did that thing in people's living rooms,
remember that where she was touring people's houses, so there
would just be like eight people.
Speaker 4 (46:13):
In the house concerts.
Speaker 1 (46:14):
Yeah. I think she was doing that with Tig, right
or I think that was just a thing for a while,
these house concerts.
Speaker 2 (46:24):
Her special was oh okay, just that, which she wouldn't
It was as opposed to being in a big theater
or whatever, but it was just her at one of
in someone's front room with like eight to twelve people.
Speaker 1 (46:39):
Yeah, I think we're talking about the same thing. I
think that was one of the But maybe there's a
whole show like that for a while that.
Speaker 3 (46:46):
I certainly don't know. I know it was from a.
Speaker 1 (46:48):
While ago, Yeah, the whole house concert thing. Tig did
that with some other like Sarah and Zach and it
was like the Crackpot Comedy Tour. I think it was
a pilot that no one ever saw. But it was
in kitchens, but sometimes they'd go somewhere and they'd rented
(47:09):
a venue, so it was like a normal show, but
apparently super fun. I don't know. I think it was
just for the experience of it. I don't think it's
in someone's kitchen and then they open a briefcase full
of money and pay you.
Speaker 2 (47:25):
But yeah, that'd be funny if the whoever has their
name on the mortgage has to.
Speaker 3 (47:31):
Pay you, right, that's the whole seat of a house concert.
Speaker 1 (47:37):
Yeah, after my sat I say, it is my another
household like street. I always thought that was weird, mainly
because it was just my mom and I at my
house and someone had come door to door.
Speaker 4 (47:51):
I'm like, oh, no, that's me.
Speaker 3 (47:54):
What do you want.
Speaker 1 (47:55):
I don't have any money carpet cleaner, we have wooden floors.
But I feel bad for you, so yes, I'll take some.
Speaker 4 (48:02):
Oh look a circus tent.
Speaker 1 (48:05):
Oh. I don't know why it started as an evil joke.
If you're fumigating a home with poison for bugs, why
does it have to be a candy striped circus tent?
Speaker 3 (48:21):
Is it like to warn people from near and far?
Speaker 1 (48:25):
I think it's to entice children, oh to enter a fumigating.
Speaker 3 (48:30):
Home and suck in some humes.
Speaker 1 (48:32):
I mean, you might as well put a clown outside. Yeah,
that said, you must be that's tall to get poisoned
in here.
Speaker 3 (48:38):
But those stripes were gray and blue.
Speaker 4 (48:40):
You're gonna want to take a right.
Speaker 2 (48:43):
They were gray and blue, which kind of changes it
a little bit. Yeah, is that a Blincoln over there once?
He's so sad about that.
Speaker 4 (48:50):
You're seeing a Lincoln straight across.
Speaker 3 (48:53):
I can go down because these guys are going left.
I can go right.
Speaker 1 (48:56):
If it's an a b Lincoln on stilts, it means
there's a mattress there.
Speaker 2 (49:02):
It was gold, a gold bust of abe Lincoln looking sleepy.
Speaker 3 (49:06):
You might not have been.
Speaker 1 (49:08):
I want to know why they think that's where a
Lincoln napped after selling mattresses all day.
Speaker 4 (49:14):
I wonder it's maybe it's always Uncle Sam.
Speaker 3 (49:17):
Maybe it was Luther Burbank's head.
Speaker 1 (49:22):
The founder of Burbank.
Speaker 3 (49:24):
Yep, okay, good old Luther.
Speaker 4 (49:29):
You said, loser Burbank, the Winter Bank.
Speaker 1 (49:32):
Burbank one, of course, the one who founded this beautiful
city sold half of it to Bob Hope.
Speaker 3 (49:37):
The loser got Glendale.
Speaker 1 (49:40):
Looser Burbank just got his bust, a gold bust, you fool,
all right, thank you, more accomplished brother of mine, Luther Luther,
what a Louther. Yeah, it's it's it's very common. I
don't know that they do it anymore. I think it's
(50:01):
because Labor Day is the day where you get a
sale on cars and mattresses. Yep.
Speaker 3 (50:10):
And he used to be President's Day.
Speaker 4 (50:13):
Right, Oh, I bet you're right. That's I'm so dumb.
Speaker 1 (50:18):
It's a blink because it's a President's Days sale.
Speaker 4 (50:21):
Yeah, right, what am I talking about? Labor Days?
Speaker 1 (50:24):
When you go to the lake and water, ski on stilts,
dress like a blink, dress.
Speaker 3 (50:30):
Like Abe Lincoln, you celebrate Abe on the water.
Speaker 1 (50:35):
There was a guy that used to walk around on
stilts in my hometown everywhere you went, or you have
a one man band set up where one one leg
played the symbol and the other and he had a banjo.
Speaker 3 (50:48):
Pretty great music.
Speaker 1 (50:49):
I mean, I'm not a big bluegrass guy. I was
traumatized by I had a roommate who was one day
was into punk rock and music that I like, and
then he was like, you know what, my dad always
played the banjo. I think I'm going to pick it up.
And he became an amazing banjo player. He played in Nashville.
He played with Steve Martin and then kind of quit
(51:14):
doing it. I have so many friends that do that.
Oh I get good at the thing and then.
Speaker 4 (51:18):
I move on.
Speaker 1 (51:18):
Yeah, but I was living with him when he was learning,
so it was just Danner, Liam dar Day, Oh shit,
Dane Liam Date fuck Dan like all day. Yes, you
don't want to hear someone learning the flute or the
banjo later on. I mean, we love and accomplish an
(51:38):
accomplished loutist all day long, all day. I wish say,
I wish flute music just played in the background all
the time.
Speaker 2 (51:48):
Yeah, that is one of my favorite. Oh said, thank
you for driving safely? Did you see that?
Speaker 1 (51:54):
Oh?
Speaker 4 (51:54):
Sorry, thanks for the sarcasm.
Speaker 1 (51:56):
It was a long time ago.
Speaker 2 (51:57):
Now, Look, police department, I did my best.
Speaker 3 (52:02):
I wasn't really paying attention.
Speaker 4 (52:04):
They went through the trouble to erect that sign to
mock you.
Speaker 2 (52:08):
Instead of ticketing me or arresting me, They're just like,
get that speed trap thing over there, all right?
Speaker 3 (52:14):
Should we wrap it down?
Speaker 1 (52:17):
Yes? What were you going to say that in.
Speaker 2 (52:21):
I was going to say that in twenty twenty six. Yes,
my goal, yes, is to start some new hobbies. One
is dance a dance, dance dance, and the other shall
be ordering off TikTok? Can that still be my host?
Speaker 1 (52:42):
Yeah?
Speaker 3 (52:42):
I'm really good at it.
Speaker 4 (52:44):
No, it's retail therapy. It's a therapy.
Speaker 3 (52:47):
It all costs seven dollars.
Speaker 4 (52:49):
Yes, it's a therapy.
Speaker 1 (52:51):
It is, and it arrives and it's like, oh, this
is for a child, and it's fell apart. Yeah, what's
the who cares? It was seven dollars?
Speaker 2 (52:58):
Yeah, except for that. How we got the Great Pacific
garbage Patch? Oh it is, I mean just people buying shit.
They don't mean throwing it away, like it's disappearing forever.
Speaker 1 (53:08):
Yeah, and that's where garbage patch kids come from.
Speaker 3 (53:12):
The stork brings.
Speaker 1 (53:14):
Garbage right, Yes, yes, my father told me that into
my twenties because he didn't want.
Speaker 4 (53:19):
To talk about sex.
Speaker 3 (53:20):
No one wants to talk about sex.
Speaker 1 (53:22):
Well, good luck with your hobbies. Made one of them
not be the flute. Thank you, and we're going to
go pick up our guests for next week's episode.
Speaker 4 (53:31):
You've been listening, Do you need a rise?
Speaker 3 (53:33):
Is a cliffhanger?
Speaker 1 (53:35):
Hyn to be continued, Hey are are? This has been
an exactly right production.
Speaker 3 (53:48):
Our Senior producer is Annalie Snelson.
Speaker 1 (53:51):
Mixed by Edson Choy.
Speaker 3 (53:52):
Our talent booker is Patrick Cootner.
Speaker 1 (53:55):
Theme song by Karen Kilgareth.
Speaker 3 (53:57):
Artwork by Chris Fairbanks.
Speaker 2 (53:59):
Follow the show on on Instagram, Twitter, and Facebook at
dinar podcast That's d y n ar Podcast.
Speaker 1 (54:05):
For more information, go to exactly rightmedia dot com.
Speaker 3 (54:09):
Thank you, Oh, You're welcome.
Are you leaving? I you wanna way back home? Either way,
we want to be there.
Speaker 2 (00:10):
Doesn't matter how much baggage you claim and give us
time and aid, terminol and gay A.
Speaker 1 (00:19):
We want to send you off in style.
Speaker 2 (00:23):
We wanna welcome you back home. Tell us all about it.
Speaker 3 (00:28):
We scared her? Was it fine? Mal porn? Do you
(00:49):
need to ride? Do you need to ride? Do you
need to ride? Do you need to ride? Do you
need to ride? Do your need you to ride?
Speaker 1 (01:01):
Ride? Do you need with Karen and Chris welcome to
Do you need to ride? This is Chris.
Speaker 3 (01:17):
Fairbanks and this is Karen Colgariff.
Speaker 1 (01:19):
We are leaving Karen's house on a beautiful summer day.
Speaker 2 (01:24):
I mean just absolutely gorgeous out here in Los Angeles.
Speaker 1 (01:27):
I just came from where it was still snowing. That's
a bit of a change, it is.
Speaker 4 (01:34):
You know, word.
Speaker 1 (01:34):
Choice is so important. And had they called global warming
climate change in the very beginning, yeah, it would more,
you know, there would have been fewer snowballs brought into
Supreme Court. Well of this snowballs in my hand, then
tell me again how the.
Speaker 4 (01:52):
World's are warming.
Speaker 1 (01:56):
But it is bizarre how around Christmas there's no snow
and now it just snows late. Yeah, and so in
the spring, the spring skiing was like a foot of
new snow. So I went snowboarding with my friends and
their kids and watch them all learn to ski.
Speaker 3 (02:13):
And hmmmm, thought pizza fries, pizza fries.
Speaker 1 (02:17):
Uh it is, yes, pizza fries. Pizza fries. You're right.
They were all bungee corded in pizza position. Oh, because
I think fries. Yeah, you want to avoid fries, you do, yeah?
Speaker 3 (02:32):
Straight?
Speaker 4 (02:33):
Yeah, well that's just uh, I thought straight fries.
Speaker 1 (02:38):
I guess dependent on how you throw them, they can
land anywhere, like that fun game making bacon. I believe
it's the board game where you take to die that
are shaped like pink little pigs and you throw them
down and however they land ones on top, ones on
(02:59):
its side, sometimes they're on each other, and there's some
sexual innuendo.
Speaker 4 (03:03):
Oh I don't remember the rest of the game.
Speaker 3 (03:06):
Okay, because that was so hot.
Speaker 1 (03:08):
Yeah, because I get I just get all sweaty because yeah,
sultry pig positions.
Speaker 3 (03:17):
Chris is in Heer's room making bacon again.
Speaker 1 (03:20):
Yeah, he doesn't even need the board. I didn't even
figure it out. I'm still trying to figure out the
trump board game. There's no go to jail on it.
Clearly it is. It is very much like monopoly. I
remember someone having it, Oh okay, and I'm like, ugh,
that guy from Home Alone too.
Speaker 2 (03:40):
I said, you know, the story behind that is that
he wouldn't let them use the building unless he could
be in the movie. So they wanted to do that, like, yeah,
he owned the building where that I guess it was
Macy's or something where he mcaulay Culkan walks in and
is like whoa, it's so Christmas y and then he's
there like hey kid, and he literally made them do that.
Speaker 3 (04:00):
Or he said you can't shoot here.
Speaker 1 (04:02):
Oh my god. If someone had just put him in
more movies, yeah, or our economy is tanking among everything else.
But that's the most current right now. There's a ticker.
You could watch it, yeap because he never got to
do stand ups.
Speaker 2 (04:18):
Yeah, he's like it's like he could have just been
a mediocre actor.
Speaker 3 (04:22):
That like odd at this point.
Speaker 1 (04:25):
Yet No, I was thinking about that with my dad.
Speaker 4 (04:28):
Who's you know your dad.
Speaker 1 (04:31):
He's just a liberal man who watches all the late
night talk shows, who watches SNL. He watches all the
new comedy movies and they are all all of entertainment,
all of art. Who would do Trump or Republicans really
(04:52):
even watch as far as comedy, none.
Speaker 3 (04:54):
Of it is for it, Gutfield.
Speaker 1 (04:56):
They just watch old listener Ray Steven Stevens or Larry That.
Speaker 4 (05:02):
I don't know what they listened to.
Speaker 1 (05:03):
But they can't watch any late night shows because they'll
defended Tim Allen.
Speaker 2 (05:07):
They will watch anything with Tim Allen, anything with Scott
Bak okay write anything with the guy with the Who's that?
Speaker 1 (05:15):
On reruns? I guess there's a new Tim Allen vehicle.
And hey, I love Galaxy Quest. There's been some good
Tim Allen movies when he is Santa Claus.
Speaker 2 (05:24):
Recently made my sister rewatch Galaxy or watch Galaxy Quest
for the first time, or maybe my niece, and she
loved it.
Speaker 3 (05:30):
I was like, this is a great movie.
Speaker 1 (05:32):
It is great. Yeah, it is great. So it's even
more unfair because we're enjoying their entertainment.
Speaker 3 (05:39):
I know. That's how it is.
Speaker 1 (05:41):
We get so much of everything. Once you turn on
a television.
Speaker 3 (05:45):
Who the liberals?
Speaker 1 (05:46):
Yeah that's liberals taken all the comedy, all the jokes
are for us. It was just I really do think
about that. Even movies would be triggering of you. Yeah,
you know, we're like compassionless religious person. Anyway, It's uh,
it's interesting. I think about it a.
Speaker 3 (06:08):
Lot, so Oxymoron what you just said.
Speaker 1 (06:10):
It is it is like military telly, military intelligence.
Speaker 3 (06:16):
What's happening?
Speaker 1 (06:16):
I don't know. I think my tongue started to swell.
I think I got stung by a spider.
Speaker 3 (06:21):
Oh no, right here in the car.
Speaker 1 (06:23):
Yeah, yeah, that's the only it's not because I am
bad at talking.
Speaker 2 (06:27):
It's no, it isn't you know what it is because
of It is because every day that Elon Musk continues
to call twitter x, more spiders come out in this car.
Just day by day, another rare, incredibly venomous spider shows up.
Speaker 1 (06:44):
Oh there is one time Martha Kelly and Austin a
giant I think it was a wolf spider. They're like
big and furry and they just exist. You just move
there and like plants that can cut your skin open,
you just are supposed to get used to it. Yeah,
And a spider was in her car and she had
(07:05):
just parked it somewhere. I don't think she ever saw
that car again. I think she'd just abandoned it, just
a good bye because we couldn't find the spider. I
looked in there with like a fly swatter. Yeah, spider's
in a car, that really.
Speaker 2 (07:20):
Especially those big ones, I mean those like a wolf spider.
Speaker 3 (07:23):
Those are the ones with the hairy legs. Right.
Speaker 4 (07:25):
That's how the world feels right now.
Speaker 1 (07:27):
It's like there's a spider in the car and we're
all trying to drive around.
Speaker 2 (07:30):
Yeah, feeling We're going ninety miles an hour on the freeway,
but there's a spider hanging over our head.
Speaker 3 (07:37):
Yes, not great.
Speaker 1 (07:39):
No, no, but I've been you know, finding ways too
feel positive.
Speaker 2 (07:51):
Would you let's share some ways to feel positive with
the listeners right now so we can help each other.
Speaker 1 (07:55):
Karen, it's very important. I know we hear it so
much that it's become cliche. You have to have hobbies
that you focus on so much that it distracts from
your livelihood. Yes, you have to take in interests, multiple interests, okay,
and get excited about them, excel at them, and then
(08:20):
you're like, hey, this is what life is all about.
Then you can be sad the rest of the day.
Speaker 3 (08:25):
Okay, I'm right to.
Speaker 4 (08:26):
Think about others.
Speaker 1 (08:28):
But you do need some selfish me time, Yes, and
what I mean for some it might be meditation.
Speaker 3 (08:35):
Yeah, give some suggestions.
Speaker 1 (08:37):
I've been meaning to learn how to meditate my whole life.
I just don't have the patience same, but I will.
I will figure it. That's just breathing and stuff. I
can figure it out, you know.
Speaker 2 (08:48):
There is like there are a couple good apps where
they do guided meditation, which is way easier than silent
meditation to me.
Speaker 1 (08:56):
Right, I don't know how someone would do silent meditation.
Speaker 2 (09:00):
It's just well, that's just you alone with your psychotic brain.
But right then the ideas you're supposed to go thinking
and then try to stop thinking.
Speaker 3 (09:10):
Yeah, you won't. And that's you don't fail or anything.
Speaker 2 (09:14):
You just notice when you when you're thinking, and then
say thinking again, and you just keep doing it over
and over, trying to do it sooner and sooner.
Speaker 4 (09:21):
It's just the.
Speaker 1 (09:22):
Whole time you're trying not to think of the stay passed.
Speaker 4 (09:25):
Marshmallow me. That kind of brain control.
Speaker 2 (09:28):
It's that level of brain control that no human has.
But it's the work. It's about. It's about the work,
so that you start to notice that these feelings and
thoughts are just clouds in the sky and they move through.
Speaker 4 (09:40):
Oh that's a good visual.
Speaker 2 (09:41):
M M.
Speaker 4 (09:43):
Okay, I will.
Speaker 1 (09:44):
But I'm the I am the person that if you
say clear your mind, I will think of all the things.
Speaker 4 (09:51):
Yeah, oh, you want me to clear my mind?
Speaker 1 (09:54):
Huh? How about a circus no one?
Speaker 3 (09:58):
And then it's right into like incubissing.
Speaker 2 (10:00):
Yeah, I wish I could do it, but I still
haven't fully recovered.
Speaker 1 (10:05):
Yeah, we haven't recovered from the past lawsuits.
Speaker 2 (10:11):
We get dinged by Incubis again for their beautiful song.
Speaker 4 (10:18):
Yeah, we gotta start. There's parody.
Speaker 1 (10:20):
Law All we have to do is make new lyrics
and turn into a country song. The other thing that
I if I try and clear my head, country music
will be playing in the background.
Speaker 2 (10:32):
Oh does that work? I know you were trying to
say that you wrote country music.
Speaker 4 (10:37):
I think I could.
Speaker 3 (10:38):
I bet you could.
Speaker 1 (10:39):
I think I could. Where's that guided meditation or online class?
Speaker 2 (10:44):
It'll be next? Okay, good, because you'll have to you'll
be done with golf soon.
Speaker 1 (10:48):
I yes, I haven't. I've been tapering off of the golfing,
but I will get back.
Speaker 2 (10:53):
Someone invited. They were like, hey, let's go golfing one day.
And I was like no, like never in the world.
But they were like, but wouldn't it be nice to
just drive around on a golf cart and like you
don't even have to play, but you just be out there.
Speaker 3 (11:05):
And I'm be like, kind kind of I guess.
Speaker 1 (11:09):
Yeah, yeah, not for me, I don't. I don't like
the golf carts. It's it's I want the exor I
want the tricking my body into exercising. And do you tennis?
Does that too?
Speaker 3 (11:21):
Are you your own caddy? Right?
Speaker 1 (11:24):
The caddies are a If you're in a tournament, they
assign you someone, but yeah, you decide on your I
have a little app that says, hey, you're this far away,
we know how far you hit this club. Hit this club,
it has measured. There's a sensor in the handle.
Speaker 3 (11:41):
Oh no, but I'm just talking about carrying and the weight.
Speaker 1 (11:43):
Oh right. I have a little cart with a little
beverage holder. It's got wheels and I push it along.
Oh okay, and then my phone is like, you hate
your seven. That's my caddy.
Speaker 3 (11:53):
Oh shit, So okay, that's cool.
Speaker 1 (11:57):
So you're in a cart with someone you've both hit balls,
different directions. Then you have to drive this little car
to each other's balls. So all of a sudden, you
don't you're not just searching for your ball lost in
long grass. You have to find this other guys, and
you've hit in different directions. It takes longer, I think
than walking. Okay, And people are like, yeah, we'll go
(12:19):
out get some extracise. Then they're in a cart, they're
smoking a cigar.
Speaker 2 (12:22):
They're just driving, making deals, making deals, watching the economy crumbled. Yes,
can I tell you a story I just remembered that
was really exciting as it was happening.
Speaker 4 (12:35):
Yes, very much.
Speaker 1 (12:36):
Tell the story.
Speaker 2 (12:37):
On my flight home from Chicago, which was last week,
I was like one of the last people and red,
Oh my god, sorry, Jesus fucking Christ.
Speaker 1 (12:49):
It's okay.
Speaker 3 (12:51):
I didn't know that. Fuck did I just do?
Speaker 4 (12:53):
It's okay.
Speaker 1 (12:54):
It was a left turn, green arrow.
Speaker 2 (12:57):
Oh my god, that guy could have absolutely he slammed
his garden of mine just because he was right and
I was wrong.
Speaker 3 (13:03):
I'm so sorry you guys.
Speaker 1 (13:04):
No, it's okay. Everyone saw it happening, including me.
Speaker 4 (13:11):
Jesus Christ, it's okay.
Speaker 1 (13:12):
That wasn't That was a minor one well, I was
in Montana, my dad's very expensive Mercedes. I went the
wrong way on a seventy mile an hour. In my defense,
it used to be a two way road. I've lived
away for a long time. They split them and have
one lane on each of the side of this little
town Arlee, Montana. And I turned into oncoming.
Speaker 3 (13:35):
Trapping Jesus, and just no one was there.
Speaker 4 (13:38):
Right, there was a car coming, but he is in
the other lane.
Speaker 1 (13:41):
It was a two lane and he looked at me
like I was crazy because he wasn't. I could tell
by his face he wasn't even born back when that
was a two way road.
Speaker 3 (13:50):
Yeah, but he didn't know what the reference was.
Speaker 4 (13:52):
No, No, I tried.
Speaker 1 (13:54):
I tried to show my birth certificate as he screamed,
oh yeah that it's okay everyone, okay, yeah, we're fine.
Speaker 2 (14:05):
Also, have I had one of these on Mike? Have
I had like a major mistake of I.
Speaker 4 (14:12):
Mean, congratulations, I made.
Speaker 2 (14:13):
It first, guys, I just drew through a red light.
Speaker 3 (14:18):
Luckily there was so much traffic. It's not like I
don't know.
Speaker 1 (14:23):
I'm surprised this car didn't make a decision like, yes.
Speaker 2 (14:27):
I do that you aren't supposed to be doing this.
I bet, I bet none of that's turned on anymore.
Speaker 3 (14:31):
But it's all off.
Speaker 4 (14:35):
It's okay, that was fine.
Speaker 3 (14:36):
Scary, yeah, scare me?
Speaker 4 (14:38):
What were you saying?
Speaker 2 (14:40):
I was trying to tell you through But Steve O
and I got so like into the Like we were
leaving Chicago.
Speaker 3 (14:46):
I was walking onto the plane. What if I did
it again?
Speaker 1 (14:51):
Stories about Steve vehicular homicide.
Speaker 2 (14:56):
So there was a guy sitting in the seat next
to my seat and he had a flat build like
skateboard hat on. It was pulled real low and he
has arms crossing his head down. So I was like, Okay,
that guy's trying to be low key. God bless you.
I don't give a shit like move so I can
sit down right.
Speaker 4 (15:14):
But then we all are on planes.
Speaker 2 (15:17):
Exactly like no one's trying to make deep eye contact
with the person that's sitting next to them where it's
like I don't want to talk to you whatever. So
it's like but this guy was kind of like down
and then just in this way where I just went
like skateboarder hat, who could this be? Which is the
fun game of Yah. Yeah, So I'm sitting in my
seat and then like the flight attendant comes up to say,
(15:37):
what do you want for lunch? Or I don't know,
whatever the questions were, and he's talking real quiet, but
his voice sounds like Steve O's voice. So I'm like, okay, well,
and I'm absolutely going to take a picture of him
like sitting like this to analyze it and see. So
I did that, and it looked exactly like Steve O
to me. So then I'm like, holy shit, I'm sitting
(15:58):
next to STEVO.
Speaker 4 (16:00):
Sounded like that, Yes.
Speaker 2 (16:01):
But he was trying to whisper, so he wanted is
that it's.
Speaker 1 (16:07):
Such a bottle?
Speaker 2 (16:09):
So but then I realized because our plane was delayed
literally like four times.
Speaker 3 (16:15):
It was wild.
Speaker 2 (16:16):
It was like it was they had this whole weather
system coming in where there was like a series of
tornadoes that were about to hit, and we got out
like just in the nick of time. So anyway we
had the plane had been delayed enough where like we
were sitting on the tarmac delayed. So by the time
it actually took off, I had to pee really bad,
and I was getting worried because I was like, there
(16:36):
is only so much more time I can be doing this.
Speaker 3 (16:39):
Yeah, and we.
Speaker 2 (16:40):
Were kind of like evening out, but the seabolt light
was not turning off. And then this random old lady
walks up like it's out of nowhere and just like
goes to the bathroom with the light on. So I
was like, hey, there you are, thanks so much. When
I'm nowhere near anything.
Speaker 4 (16:58):
Yeah, there's no nothing near us now.
Speaker 1 (17:02):
I just got up. I heard about oh a left turn.
Speaker 2 (17:04):
I heard you what, so straight just straight through from
a stopped red light you went.
Speaker 1 (17:10):
God, it would have been so great if we both
had Elon musk impersonation.
Speaker 3 (17:14):
Just read have you seen James of Domians?
Speaker 1 (17:16):
It's great. I like wearing the veneer teeth and I'm
not even sure Elon Musk has those mud its. I
he looks like him and sounds like him, and it's great.
Speaker 2 (17:29):
And he kind of looks like the MCB mac to
Night Moon. Yes, yes, like the chin and the teeth.
Speaker 3 (17:36):
And the eyes.
Speaker 2 (17:37):
Anyway, what a curse to be that being, to be
that being, to be that moon? Yes, so okay, So
so she goes comes back and I turned to this
guy and I was just like, I'm really sorry, I
have to go, like right now, and he doesn't turn
his head, so I'm like, now I know it's Steve
because you're you're doing everything you can not to like
(17:59):
interact where I'm doing something weird right now against the
like seatbelt sign right right anyway, I go up go
to the bathroom. Immediately the flight attendant is like, ladies
and gentlemen, please do not get up like I was
the cause of what, which I don't think I've ever
done that either, so you know, first times.
Speaker 3 (18:17):
And then I go sit back down.
Speaker 2 (18:18):
I'm like, I'm fine, whatever, and I don't ever turn
any part of my body toward Steve O for the
rest of the flight until the very end. He gets up,
opens up the overhead bin and says, do you have
anything up here you want me to get down?
Speaker 3 (18:32):
I look up and it's not seatbelts.
Speaker 1 (18:34):
Oh that's so great.
Speaker 2 (18:35):
I was so excited for like literally for hours, sustained
hours of just like I don't need to doction, I
don't need any interaction.
Speaker 3 (18:43):
I'm just here with him.
Speaker 2 (18:45):
I'm just like doing something next to him, and that's
great for me.
Speaker 1 (18:50):
It's so funny that I've watched him ever since he
was just doing backflips and skateboard videos and I know
him to never wear a hat, so I was like,
it's weird. He must have been traveling in a disguise.
Speaker 3 (19:01):
Well, now I know not to fall for the hat.
Speaker 2 (19:04):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (19:04):
Yeah, I think it's just like shaved head guy and
he's doing he's got like a big I think it's
hard to avoid the when someone falls asleep and they
draw penis on your forehead. That exact art is tattooed
on his forehead, currently a new one. So it's like
going back one yeah, back to the old day. I
(19:25):
thought he was like a guy that's gotten his old
controversial tattoos removed.
Speaker 3 (19:31):
But I bet he's not.
Speaker 2 (19:33):
Like I know he's sober now, but I bet he's
not the kind of person that's like, I should have
never done that.
Speaker 3 (19:37):
He's like, fuck it, right.
Speaker 4 (19:39):
Yeah, I guess.
Speaker 1 (19:40):
Yeah. It was all a life that he lived that
he acknowledges and doesn't regret.
Speaker 4 (19:46):
I suppose some of the things.
Speaker 1 (19:47):
I'm sure he does.
Speaker 3 (19:48):
Sure we all do.
Speaker 1 (19:49):
Look, yes, we all thought it was bad to slack
line over those alligators for an MTP A low union
paide job. Yes, you or Steva?
Speaker 2 (20:01):
Yes, while in that Wild Boys in Wild Boys, you're
in it?
Speaker 1 (20:06):
No, Oh, Chris Pontius.
Speaker 2 (20:08):
A lot of people confuse us, I love Chris Ponti.
Speaker 1 (20:12):
He is, Yeah, he seems like a nice person.
Speaker 3 (20:14):
He seems like the real deal.
Speaker 2 (20:17):
And also in the most recent Jackass looks exactly the
same as Wild Boys days. Oh yeah, yeah, like doesn't
you know many people age and it's been a very
long time, and he literally standing there like he just
walked out of Wild Boys and onto Yeah.
Speaker 1 (20:32):
Yeah, I think that. I think it's just luck of
the jeans in that one. Yeah, but yeah, they got
they fell onto alligators and they were snapping in mind
like it was terrifying little ones. But still I'm.
Speaker 2 (20:48):
Sorry, Like that shit or them dressing up his bananas
and sitting near silver bacerrilla isn't freaking out, Like did
you ever see that one? It's like this shit they
were doing was so unnecessarily dangerous, risky, and it was
as if like the way the producers did it and
made them do it, it was like, well, we're out here,
like it was this great thing to do. And then
(21:08):
it's just like there's a silver bag guerrilla and I'll
just sit over here in the bananic assume and hope
he doesn't kill me.
Speaker 1 (21:14):
Yeah, I mean from the beginning, I couldn't relate the
very first thing I saw Johnny Knoxville do is let
someone shoot him in the chest with a bulletproof vest
without out doing any testing of anything. Uh.
Speaker 4 (21:29):
And I'm like, oh, I can't relate it to that
at all.
Speaker 1 (21:33):
That's uh.
Speaker 4 (21:34):
I am not that guy. That guy.
Speaker 1 (21:38):
Yeah, because I did have the opportunity to weasel in
in the beginning, did you yes?
Speaker 3 (21:45):
And you said no?
Speaker 4 (21:46):
I said, I'm on a road trip.
Speaker 1 (21:47):
I don't have time to think of stunts, and I
don't think that what you're talking about is true.
Speaker 3 (21:54):
Because this is not a real offer.
Speaker 1 (21:56):
Yeah, and should we go to this place? Oh?
Speaker 4 (21:59):
Yeah, I like that.
Speaker 1 (22:00):
I like that.
Speaker 2 (22:00):
Ok.
Speaker 1 (22:02):
Yeah. Aaron McGhee he is an old snowboarder pal and
he was one of the beginning Jackass the TV show guys,
And he said, I gotta think of ideas. He had
a shirt that he made that with puffy iron on
letters that said Jackass on it. So I didn't think
it was real. Yeah, it seems pretty I have a show, yeah,
(22:26):
MTV and Spike Jones and me, do you want to
think of stunts? And so not really, as it started
to happen as it was already a show. I realized
he was on it and realized this was what he
was talking about. But even all that, and so my
friends always said you could have been on it, and
I'm like, I don't think so. I think he just
wanted some ideas. I wasn't going to jump in there
(22:48):
and say, oh, I'm scared of everything.
Speaker 4 (22:51):
Can I be that guy?
Speaker 2 (22:52):
Well? They do, but I mean, like, you wouldn't have
wanted to be the whipping boy on there.
Speaker 3 (22:57):
That's what a lot a lot of those guys.
Speaker 2 (22:58):
I'm like, oh, this just feels like high school pecking
order bullshit that I don't love.
Speaker 1 (23:03):
Yeah, I don't think someone with my anger issues would
have ended up being the whipping boy.
Speaker 4 (23:08):
I just would have been a really bad member at Jack.
Speaker 1 (23:11):
He doesn't do anything, and then he hits his friends
when they try and make him. Someone tastes him. Laughs,
You taste him and he punches you. It doesn't make sense.
I'd be the least favorite. No posters of me on
any child's wall. Yeah, yeah, that's I on my flight.
(23:33):
Similar thing we're taking off, and I did the same thing.
I got up while we're still ascending or decent, But
I it just is down to flight attendant. Like I
was like, I really have to go to the bathroom,
and she was like, oh, that's all right. Yeah, And
(23:55):
I knew it was not someone made an announcement please remain.
Speaker 3 (24:00):
I'm like I would have if I could.
Speaker 4 (24:03):
No one wants what could happen to happen?
Speaker 2 (24:06):
I mean, it's so funny. I know I usually have
that all planned or whatever, but they must. It must
happen all the time. If you're going to delay the
plane over and over, everyone has it timed out perfectly.
Speaker 3 (24:18):
I know exactly how much of my.
Speaker 2 (24:20):
Fiji water bottle to drink while I'm waiting, Yeah, before
and after, Like I just don't want to be trapped
anywhere where I can't go to the bathroom.
Speaker 1 (24:28):
Yeah, I'm designed my whole day to not ever. I
will dehydrate myself just to avoid that situation on a plane.
But I there was turbulence on the.
Speaker 5 (24:40):
Way in, and I thought I saw peripherally the wheels
the landing gear of another plane, a real John Lethgow
or actually in the black and white version, it was someone.
Speaker 1 (24:55):
Too William it was Shatner. Yeah, I swear I saw
a plane coming to the sud and we were having turbulence,
so everyone was already I make fun of people when
they scream and grab the arm of their neighbor, and
because I've gotten used to it to where it's like,
we're not gonna Yeah, I yelped, high pitched. I screamed
when I thought I and everyone looked at me. I'm
(25:19):
just so surprised that I could make that noise and
that I chose to be that panic. I don't know
anyone who's ever perished in a plane wreck. Well I
know three people that have gotten ask answer, why am
I not screaming on the toilet?
Speaker 3 (25:34):
You're screaming inside?
Speaker 1 (25:35):
Screaming on the.
Speaker 2 (25:36):
Every day you scream and scream inside on the toilet.
Speaker 1 (25:40):
And then I grabbed the arm of the person next
to me.
Speaker 2 (25:42):
I mean that's why I don't love traveling as much
as because I feel like everyone's on the verge of screaming.
So it's like that, right, You're you didn't choose to scream.
It was a reaction in a heightened situation. Yeah, like
that's just kind of how it is.
Speaker 1 (25:56):
Yeah, I really thought something was coming at us, because
that planes collide, that seems to be a new thing
that's happening, and it's on my mind. And I don't
know what I saw, but there was a thing that
wasn't cloudser sky. It was dark. It flew by. It
was the monster.
Speaker 4 (26:15):
It was John Leckow.
Speaker 3 (26:17):
It was the monster.
Speaker 1 (26:18):
It was it was Victor French hang gliding. I don't
know what it was, but it was.
Speaker 3 (26:26):
It was worthy.
Speaker 1 (26:27):
Yeah, it made me yelp or I went a act
like Kathy. I just did a high pitch. Oh.
Speaker 3 (26:33):
Then it was a bikini, that's what it was.
Speaker 1 (26:36):
Right, it was it was cold coffee. It was a
stack of paperwork. But yeah, it I do notice that
every time I'm descending into Salt Lake City, which is
a hub. You gotta go to salt it's lobbly all
(26:56):
been there, there's always crazy.
Speaker 3 (26:59):
Oh that's because the mountain range and stuff.
Speaker 4 (27:02):
Yes, and the Salt Lake.
Speaker 3 (27:03):
It's very it's that salty lake.
Speaker 4 (27:10):
Why would they get rid of it? Everyone likes stonnuts.
Speaker 2 (27:12):
That one too, was like especially glazed, like deeply saturated
with glaze. It was kind of gross to eat. And
I every once in a while, I'm like, I'm fucking eating
one of those things.
Speaker 4 (27:24):
Hey, when you're in your car.
Speaker 1 (27:26):
You can eat anything.
Speaker 3 (27:27):
Oh that's good to know.
Speaker 1 (27:29):
Yeah, and you don't have to stop when someone's looking.
Speaker 3 (27:33):
In or when the light is read.
Speaker 1 (27:35):
I'm in my car. Yeah, that was a special situation. Also,
if you're in your car and everyone starts moving, you
move too.
Speaker 4 (27:45):
Yes, those were people turning.
Speaker 3 (27:47):
Left, but that's why they were moving.
Speaker 2 (27:49):
But also there was It's the thing in LA people
the green arrow shows up and immediately someone hanks right,
and so thees and then I think they're honking up
me or that I have somehow paused, and that's and
also the car that was supposed to be turning left
also was didn't go right away.
Speaker 3 (28:10):
I don't know, No, I.
Speaker 1 (28:13):
There had to be something. I really couldn't. If we
were in court right now and I had to describe it,
we'd be in big trouble.
Speaker 2 (28:20):
I think we already are. I kept looking behind, like,
were there any cops? Did anybody see me do this
insanely illegal thing?
Speaker 3 (28:28):
But not in La.
Speaker 1 (28:30):
That would be funny if we just both got we
got pulled over, and the cops just we're just laughing,
What the hell did we just do?
Speaker 3 (28:38):
I'm so sorry.
Speaker 1 (28:39):
This is so refreshing. I love writing tickets for laughing
two laughing idiots.
Speaker 3 (28:47):
I've got for a while.
Speaker 2 (28:49):
I had a gift card to Outback Steakhouse in my
wallet for a long time. When's that episode we come
out all filled with awesome blossoms?
Speaker 1 (29:01):
Do you mean blooming onions?
Speaker 3 (29:02):
Yep?
Speaker 1 (29:03):
Yeah?
Speaker 4 (29:05):
Did you try and wash the ramen off your face
with chocolate?
Speaker 1 (29:09):
Yep?
Speaker 3 (29:10):
Yep?
Speaker 1 (29:11):
That kid? You know the kid, right?
Speaker 3 (29:14):
I think the spiral video.
Speaker 1 (29:16):
Yeah, she's she looks like a somewhat feral child and
she's chocolate all over her face and they're like, ah, why.
Speaker 4 (29:26):
Do you have chocolate in your face?
Speaker 1 (29:27):
She's like, I was eating ramen and I it's spilled.
And she's like, did you wipe the ramen off with chotla?
And she said yep. And I watch it. That's one
of those videos I've saved. It puts me in a
good mood. Yeah, that's my meditation.
Speaker 3 (29:46):
That is true meditation. Just just watch that for half
an hour straight.
Speaker 1 (29:50):
Yeah that counts. Yeah.
Speaker 2 (29:52):
I like the one where the girl is that can
I pit that Doug and it's a bear?
Speaker 4 (29:58):
Is that the original?
Speaker 1 (30:00):
Oh?
Speaker 3 (30:00):
Maybe not?
Speaker 1 (30:01):
I don't know. That is the one I've seen them
like that has to be from something else.
Speaker 2 (30:05):
Yeah, you're right, But the first time I saw it,
that's I saw just as that, So that's how I
learned it. But I'm sure the original was something different.
But it's so funny.
Speaker 4 (30:16):
Yeah, I bet that now.
Speaker 2 (30:18):
And it literally is as a little girl pointing to
a black bear that's trying to walk up to the
cabin and the mother's trying to pull her inside, and
she's just leaning toward the baron pointing.
Speaker 1 (30:29):
So good?
Speaker 3 (30:30):
Can I bet that now?
Speaker 1 (30:32):
Is there any chance that was James Corden that just
walked by?
Speaker 2 (30:37):
You must have left the country after that talk show ended.
Speaker 1 (30:40):
Yeah, yeah he got he got chased out.
Speaker 4 (30:43):
What'd you do again? He stole some jokes or some
people just were mad at him.
Speaker 3 (30:48):
I feel like he wasn't beloved the way he could
have done.
Speaker 1 (30:52):
Well, the way I even thought he was a lot
Like when they come and you don't know who they
are and then they're just confident. I'm like, oh, I
guess I'm this guy, but it didn't mark this time.
Confidence doesn't always work, you guys know.
Speaker 3 (31:05):
Sometimes it takes fifteen years to not work.
Speaker 2 (31:08):
Yes, this is weird because my ac used to go
in numbers. You could so there was low, medium, and high.
But then you could also just be like the numbers
were dictated to speed, so it was like much more precise.
Speaker 4 (31:25):
That's what it's an upgrade or updates.
Speaker 1 (31:29):
Because Elon muskits trying to get Americans to stop paying
attention to numbers, maybe we won't all panic damn it.
That's what it is.
Speaker 3 (31:38):
I refuse to stop paying attention to numbers.
Speaker 1 (31:41):
Yeah, if you ignore the numbers, everything is fine. Right now,
That's who I thought it was. James Gordon.
Speaker 4 (31:46):
Oh yeah, I know it's not him at all.
Speaker 3 (31:49):
That guy looks like he works in the costume department somewhere.
Yes he does, and he gets stuff done.
Speaker 4 (31:55):
Guy, he does.
Speaker 1 (31:56):
He's willing to run up a ladder before it's been
fully erected.
Speaker 3 (32:01):
Just to grab these two things.
Speaker 1 (32:03):
Yeah, he's a go getter.
Speaker 3 (32:07):
I just can't.
Speaker 2 (32:07):
It's almost that kind of thing where I'm like, did
I imagine that this used to have numbers? But it did,
and I just don't want it. I guess to always
be on. Also, onlys are you? Do? You?
Speaker 3 (32:20):
Do you feel any air? I could use a layer
back here?
Speaker 1 (32:23):
Do those mean that Onaliza's heat is being the seat.
Speaker 3 (32:27):
That's the first seat heater. But there I will.
Speaker 1 (32:30):
Say heat theater the rest of my life.
Speaker 3 (32:34):
Did I say heat.
Speaker 4 (32:35):
Because I said heat?
Speaker 1 (32:37):
Getting seat?
Speaker 3 (32:38):
We can roll the tape back.
Speaker 1 (32:40):
Those look like seat lines because the wiggly lines.
Speaker 2 (32:46):
Right?
Speaker 1 (32:47):
Do do do?
Speaker 3 (32:48):
But like I need not just heat, but where to
put a c all off? No?
Speaker 2 (32:55):
No, no, no no, okay do you know that? My
friend Kiaren Irnerson used to do that, Like in just
a hot summer day. She would turn my seater on
and I didn't know it, and then I would suddenly
be in a bad mood and be like, I don't care,
we can, I don't care if we go, and she'd
be like are you mad?
Speaker 3 (33:15):
And I'd be like and then I'd be like, god,
damn it. My ass would just be really hot.
Speaker 1 (33:19):
Wow. She's like, that's a comedic genius. She should have
been on Jackass.
Speaker 3 (33:25):
She's a girl, Steve O.
Speaker 1 (33:26):
That's the more subtle pranks where they all just get
kind of grumpy. Yeah, surprise, I put an itching powder
in your shorts. You didn't see just itch it should up.
I'm sorry I didn't become a jackass with you.
Speaker 2 (33:43):
Aaron mcgheehee you need to send him a card.
Speaker 4 (33:47):
No, Like those guys are all limp and they all.
Speaker 3 (33:49):
They're all hurt and their feelings are hurt.
Speaker 1 (33:52):
Their feelings are hurt. I've been realizing for years. I
you know, because of the app with uber and left,
they don't really care if their drivers make money. But
it turns out they only make money off our tips
and they never get twenty percent because they give you.
Speaker 4 (34:10):
Do you want to give one or three or five?
Speaker 1 (34:12):
I think that's another thing where it used to be
a percentage.
Speaker 4 (34:17):
Yes, some updates.
Speaker 2 (34:18):
I've seen both, and maybe sometimes it's like it's the
number one. The price is lower, like the total is lower,
so they're not going to percentage something low, just like
how about two bucks?
Speaker 1 (34:30):
And I know it's expensive right now, but everyone, we've
got to start giving these drivers twenty percent.
Speaker 3 (34:35):
That's all I'm saying minimum.
Speaker 2 (34:37):
Yeah at least, well that's what cleared my guilt when
because people are like, it's such a that kind of
gig work sucks and you shouldn't order from there, and
it's like, no, no order from there, and just give
them a fucking fifty percent tip if you can't, like
if you have the money to be ordering and having
people bring you fucking McDonald's Karen kilgear. Then you give them,
(34:58):
you reward them for that. Not I was like, yeah,
that's what I'm owed. It's just like, no, you the
other day. Who could it be my sister?
Speaker 4 (35:07):
Oh it is podcasting time every day.
Speaker 1 (35:11):
It's not.
Speaker 4 (35:11):
Maybe you just talk to your sister every day, which
is great.
Speaker 3 (35:14):
They both work.
Speaker 1 (35:16):
Oh right, Oh, it was so good. It was really good.
We're just talking about tipping your drivers and the and
the got it back. Yeah.
Speaker 3 (35:31):
Here's the big thing I like to do lately.
Speaker 2 (35:34):
If I order Postmates or Uber Eats or whatever at work,
I forget to change the address when I'm home, and
then the food I order it and so very much
neat at the end of the day is delivered to
basically the Bourbon Airport and nowhere near my house.
Speaker 3 (35:51):
And then I have.
Speaker 2 (35:51):
To talk to the driver who I just did that
to and be like, hey, either I'll cancel this or
you can bring it to me, Like this is my
fault and you're just sitting outside an empty building, right.
The last guy that did it, it was on Saturday morning,
and I was like, don't worry about it, I'll cancel it.
Enjoy the coffee, is like my fault. And he was like, no, no,
(36:13):
hold on, I just have to like put you know,
give me the other address I'll put it in or whatever.
So he drives basically from right down the street from
my house.
Speaker 3 (36:24):
I'm not going to do it.
Speaker 1 (36:25):
No, no, let's play it real, say.
Speaker 3 (36:28):
Not rush that red.
Speaker 2 (36:30):
So he picks up the coffee from two minutes away
from my house, drives it fifteen minutes away from my house,
and drives it back fifteen minutes to my house and.
Speaker 3 (36:40):
Drops it off.
Speaker 2 (36:41):
So I walked outside because he was also having a
hard time finding the house. Oh great, and I just
walked outside and gave him twenty more bucks because he
already had a tip. But I was just like, you
did not have to do this, and it was so
nice of you.
Speaker 4 (36:52):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (36:53):
I had the opposite where I the girl I seeing
at the time, I had accidentally and this is when
I lived all the way in Venice. We ordered food
and it was sent to her house across the city
and the guy called I can't find the door. I
meant Vermont and I was like, oh my gosh, I'm
(37:14):
so sorry. You can cancel the order. And he's like no, no,
where do you live? And I could tell you it's pissed. Yeah,
Like I'm all the way in Venice Beach. He's like, okay,
I'll be there, and he drove. It took a half hour.
And when he arrived though, he knocked on the door
and it was of course, taco bell was in a bag.
(37:34):
He threw it at me and walked away. So I
didn't even have the chance. He wanted to do that
and not give me the chance to tip, but no, no, no,
And he was dressed like Freddy Krueger. He had this
scary he had a hat on with a long bill
dude and a striped gray and red sweater. But it
(37:55):
was not Halloween, and he was a big angry kid.
He was like a He looked like he beat me up.
So I was like, okay, he's upset. I'm gonna go
out there with some cash. So I grabbed like fifteen
bucks and I went out and he was pissing on
the side of my house because it was a long
drive christ and I was like, oh, I'll wait till
(38:19):
you're done. I was just gonna give you some money.
I'm sorry that it and then it ended fine. He realized, Oh,
I was mean to that guy and I peed on
his house and he still gave me a tip.
Speaker 4 (38:29):
Maybe I shouldn't be such a jokey.
Speaker 3 (38:31):
Maybe I should fucking relax Freddy Kruger style.
Speaker 1 (38:33):
Yeah. I think that was his last day doing that.
But my Uber driver, it tells you how many rides
they've given. She had given close to eighteen thousand rides
Jesus Christ. And I was like, she seemed like a
young person to me.
Speaker 4 (38:48):
I felt like.
Speaker 1 (38:50):
There wasn't enough time in her life to do that
many rides. And I was like, it says you've done
seventeen thousand rides. She's like, oh really, Yeah, wouldn't surprise me.
Really was not enjoying it anymore. Yeah, and I did
that thing. They used to be smart. But this is
(39:10):
for anyone that flies to Lax that my go to
move was to walk out and go to those hotels.
Speaker 4 (39:16):
If I just have small bags, why not.
Speaker 1 (39:18):
It's several it's cheaper by dozens of dollars, and.
Speaker 3 (39:22):
The weight is so much less, like a whole hack.
Speaker 1 (39:26):
Well, things have changed, and every block I walked away
from the airport it increased. I don't know if it
was because I was approaching five o'clock rush hour, but
I walked at least half a mile to pay the
exact same price and wait much longer than I would
have at the airport where all the cars are hovering.
Speaker 3 (39:46):
So never do that again.
Speaker 1 (39:47):
I will never do it again. It used to be
my little hack. Just walk, go for a nice walk.
You've been sitting, get some blood flown in the legs.
Speaker 2 (39:57):
No, it was.
Speaker 3 (40:00):
But my question is, was this recently yesterday? Oh shit?
Speaker 1 (40:06):
Yeah? Okay, And the last time I did it it
worked great. It was like thirty dollars cheaper.
Speaker 4 (40:13):
So yes, they've.
Speaker 1 (40:15):
Changed some things. Everything is kind of terrible right now.
But just dive into those hobbies.
Speaker 2 (40:23):
Everyone, And my new hobby is driving through a red
light for no reason.
Speaker 1 (40:29):
You're so good at it. I think I saw your
first time. Jesus correct, No, it was.
Speaker 4 (40:36):
I know how you feel. I don't.
Speaker 1 (40:38):
I'm not a mistake maker. I'm not a fumbler. I'm
not a dropper. I don't drop things. I don't trip
When I do and people see it, I can't stop
talking about it for a week because I don't. That's
the one the one thing I'm proud of. It is
the only thing I'm proud of my ability did.
Speaker 2 (40:58):
Not because you feel like I don't know. I feel
like I just don't. I'm not trying to. I feel
like so many people that drive in Los Angeles like,
let me get up there, and it's like I learned
long ago where you're just like, we're all going to
be between these lights for as long as it takes.
Speaker 1 (41:16):
Don't rush yeah for a minute in that intersection, you
look like the impatient Tesla lady yes, and you don't
want to be here.
Speaker 2 (41:23):
And that hilarious teen from Campbell Hall with the big
flof of hair who literally was like put his hand
like you gotta be kidding me where it's like, I'm
not choosing to drive into your car.
Speaker 3 (41:37):
I didn't realize what was happening.
Speaker 1 (41:39):
Wait, when what's you? We've talked of this. Who's the
teen from the hall?
Speaker 2 (41:45):
The guy that was making the left to me look
like a teenager and he did this thing like what
are you doing where it's like, yeah, I'm making a
gigantic mistake.
Speaker 1 (41:54):
I just blacked out. I just saw a white light
and I knew something what's happening?
Speaker 3 (42:00):
Like this is it? This is where I die on
Laurel Canyon and more.
Speaker 1 (42:06):
In the middle of a conversation where it's talking about
things that make you feel better about life.
Speaker 2 (42:13):
We really tried our best, and then I drove us
into the darkness.
Speaker 1 (42:17):
Hey, if you're still wanting a donut, there's always.
Speaker 3 (42:22):
Randy you know. Have you had those? There's the fucking
so good Yes, that's the big one from the.
Speaker 1 (42:28):
Report, right, Okay, and there's several of those donuts on buildings.
I think Randy's is all over the place. I think
so too is Randy's. There's a documentary that I haven't
seen yet that I heard. It's great about all the
Korean folks that moved and just took over the donut
in history in Los Angeles. I go really really good. Yeah,
(42:49):
I need to remit. I think it's called Donut King.
Speaker 3 (42:51):
Oh I want to see that.
Speaker 2 (42:52):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (42:52):
Yeah, but there are there are guys like Randy that
have multiple donut places. It's it's like you get into it,
you guys. If you've been thinking about getting into the
donut racket, join in. Yeah. The city's built on donuts.
Speaker 3 (43:12):
Randy's donuts.
Speaker 2 (43:13):
Somebody brought a box with those donuts and they're just classic,
like those airy, beautiful, fresh, well.
Speaker 1 (43:21):
Made the donuts we want, not the big, chunky ones
with bacon and.
Speaker 3 (43:25):
Fucking Captain crunch sick.
Speaker 1 (43:27):
Come on, David Portland, Yeah you with your voodoo that
you all do so well.
Speaker 3 (43:35):
Yeah we love you Portland.
Speaker 1 (43:36):
Yes we do.
Speaker 4 (43:38):
I love that city, but come on with your donuts.
Speaker 3 (43:42):
We can't keep eating these fucking donuts.
Speaker 1 (43:45):
We get super opinionated about donuts like New Yorkers and
they're crushed. Oh, we have to talk about pizza again.
But then you eat the pizza and you're like, oh,
I see what you're saying.
Speaker 3 (43:55):
You're like, holy shit, where'd you get this pizza?
Speaker 1 (43:57):
Yeah it's New York like they Okay, I don't want
to talk about it.
Speaker 4 (44:01):
Just let me have another.
Speaker 3 (44:02):
Safe I do want to talk about it and eat it?
Speaker 1 (44:04):
Yeah, I do.
Speaker 4 (44:06):
God, why are we hungry right now?
Speaker 3 (44:08):
I mean?
Speaker 4 (44:11):
Are we?
Speaker 1 (44:12):
Did we ever type in our guests for the next episode.
Don't get excited everyone.
Speaker 2 (44:17):
Yeah, we're not even talking about you are Do you
know where where you're going?
Speaker 3 (44:23):
Generally? But yeah, yeah, okay, but not really.
Speaker 4 (44:26):
I generally am lost. We're I could type.
Speaker 3 (44:28):
It in, but we're generally right now? How close are
we on Le's pretty close.
Speaker 1 (44:35):
Yeah, I'm gonna I'm gonna just do my Do.
Speaker 3 (44:37):
You want to talk about Alaska for a little bit.
Speaker 1 (44:39):
Oh, thank you for reminding me what a thoughtful lot
I have shows in Alaska.
Speaker 3 (44:44):
I'm your good friend.
Speaker 4 (44:46):
Yes, thank you for being my good friend.
Speaker 3 (44:48):
You're welcome, my good friend.
Speaker 1 (44:50):
I am coming to Alaska friendless too, Fairbanks, where I
have done a little research.
Speaker 4 (44:56):
I'm related and it's coming.
Speaker 1 (44:59):
To Yes, it's called my coming Back Home shows, even
though I've never been there, and it's Alaska, Fairbanks, Alaska
the twenty third through the twenty sixth.
Speaker 4 (45:11):
I'm excited about.
Speaker 1 (45:12):
It because I'm doing a little a pub and then
another little pub, and then I'm doing like their main theater,
so it ramps up like like Maria Bamford's special Hell yeah, no, Yeah,
she did one where she's like just telling jokes to
her husband, then some friends outside of her house, then
at a bowling alley. Have you seen that one? Yeah?
(45:34):
And then eventually it's in like a music venue theater,
and then it's like a big theater at the end.
Speaker 4 (45:41):
And it's great because.
Speaker 1 (45:43):
You see how a comic and how Maria approaches actually
for her she just is who she is no matter
who's there. But you could tell there was like a
level of it's pretty rad to do stand up for
just three people on a bench.
Speaker 4 (46:03):
Yeah, but it was working and it's great.
Speaker 2 (46:05):
Well, and she did that thing in people's living rooms,
remember that where she was touring people's houses, so there
would just be like eight people.
Speaker 4 (46:13):
In the house concerts.
Speaker 1 (46:14):
Yeah. I think she was doing that with Tig, right
or I think that was just a thing for a while,
these house concerts.
Speaker 2 (46:24):
Her special was oh okay, just that, which she wouldn't
It was as opposed to being in a big theater
or whatever, but it was just her at one of
in someone's front room with like eight to twelve people.
Speaker 1 (46:39):
Yeah, I think we're talking about the same thing. I
think that was one of the But maybe there's a
whole show like that for a while that.
Speaker 3 (46:46):
I certainly don't know. I know it was from a.
Speaker 1 (46:48):
While ago, Yeah, the whole house concert thing. Tig did
that with some other like Sarah and Zach and it
was like the Crackpot Comedy Tour. I think it was
a pilot that no one ever saw. But it was
in kitchens, but sometimes they'd go somewhere and they'd rented
(47:09):
a venue, so it was like a normal show, but
apparently super fun. I don't know. I think it was
just for the experience of it. I don't think it's
in someone's kitchen and then they open a briefcase full
of money and pay you.
Speaker 2 (47:25):
But yeah, that'd be funny if the whoever has their
name on the mortgage has to.
Speaker 3 (47:31):
Pay you, right, that's the whole seat of a house concert.
Speaker 1 (47:37):
Yeah, after my sat I say, it is my another
household like street. I always thought that was weird, mainly
because it was just my mom and I at my
house and someone had come door to door.
Speaker 4 (47:51):
I'm like, oh, no, that's me.
Speaker 3 (47:54):
What do you want.
Speaker 1 (47:55):
I don't have any money carpet cleaner, we have wooden floors.
But I feel bad for you, so yes, I'll take some.
Speaker 4 (48:02):
Oh look a circus tent.
Speaker 1 (48:05):
Oh. I don't know why it started as an evil joke.
If you're fumigating a home with poison for bugs, why
does it have to be a candy striped circus tent?
Speaker 3 (48:21):
Is it like to warn people from near and far?
Speaker 1 (48:25):
I think it's to entice children, oh to enter a fumigating.
Speaker 3 (48:30):
Home and suck in some humes.
Speaker 1 (48:32):
I mean, you might as well put a clown outside. Yeah,
that said, you must be that's tall to get poisoned
in here.
Speaker 3 (48:38):
But those stripes were gray and blue.
Speaker 4 (48:40):
You're gonna want to take a right.
Speaker 2 (48:43):
They were gray and blue, which kind of changes it
a little bit. Yeah, is that a Blincoln over there once?
He's so sad about that.
Speaker 4 (48:50):
You're seeing a Lincoln straight across.
Speaker 3 (48:53):
I can go down because these guys are going left.
I can go right.
Speaker 1 (48:56):
If it's an a b Lincoln on stilts, it means
there's a mattress there.
Speaker 2 (49:02):
It was gold, a gold bust of abe Lincoln looking sleepy.
Speaker 3 (49:06):
You might not have been.
Speaker 1 (49:08):
I want to know why they think that's where a
Lincoln napped after selling mattresses all day.
Speaker 4 (49:14):
I wonder it's maybe it's always Uncle Sam.
Speaker 3 (49:17):
Maybe it was Luther Burbank's head.
Speaker 1 (49:22):
The founder of Burbank.
Speaker 3 (49:24):
Yep, okay, good old Luther.
Speaker 4 (49:29):
You said, loser Burbank, the Winter Bank.
Speaker 1 (49:32):
Burbank one, of course, the one who founded this beautiful
city sold half of it to Bob Hope.
Speaker 3 (49:37):
The loser got Glendale.
Speaker 1 (49:40):
Looser Burbank just got his bust, a gold bust, you fool,
all right, thank you, more accomplished brother of mine, Luther Luther,
what a Louther. Yeah, it's it's it's very common. I
don't know that they do it anymore. I think it's
(50:01):
because Labor Day is the day where you get a
sale on cars and mattresses. Yep.
Speaker 3 (50:10):
And he used to be President's Day.
Speaker 4 (50:13):
Right, Oh, I bet you're right. That's I'm so dumb.
Speaker 1 (50:18):
It's a blink because it's a President's Days sale.
Speaker 4 (50:21):
Yeah, right, what am I talking about? Labor Days?
Speaker 1 (50:24):
When you go to the lake and water, ski on stilts,
dress like a blink, dress.
Speaker 3 (50:30):
Like Abe Lincoln, you celebrate Abe on the water.
Speaker 1 (50:35):
There was a guy that used to walk around on
stilts in my hometown everywhere you went, or you have
a one man band set up where one one leg
played the symbol and the other and he had a banjo.
Speaker 3 (50:48):
Pretty great music.
Speaker 1 (50:49):
I mean, I'm not a big bluegrass guy. I was
traumatized by I had a roommate who was one day
was into punk rock and music that I like, and
then he was like, you know what, my dad always
played the banjo. I think I'm going to pick it up.
And he became an amazing banjo player. He played in Nashville.
He played with Steve Martin and then kind of quit
(51:14):
doing it. I have so many friends that do that.
Oh I get good at the thing and then.
Speaker 4 (51:18):
I move on.
Speaker 1 (51:18):
Yeah, but I was living with him when he was learning,
so it was just Danner, Liam dar Day, Oh shit,
Dane Liam Date fuck Dan like all day. Yes, you
don't want to hear someone learning the flute or the
banjo later on. I mean, we love and accomplish an
(51:38):
accomplished loutist all day long, all day. I wish say,
I wish flute music just played in the background all
the time.
Speaker 2 (51:48):
Yeah, that is one of my favorite. Oh said, thank
you for driving safely? Did you see that?
Speaker 1 (51:54):
Oh?
Speaker 4 (51:54):
Sorry, thanks for the sarcasm.
Speaker 1 (51:56):
It was a long time ago.
Speaker 2 (51:57):
Now, Look, police department, I did my best.
Speaker 3 (52:02):
I wasn't really paying attention.
Speaker 4 (52:04):
They went through the trouble to erect that sign to
mock you.
Speaker 2 (52:08):
Instead of ticketing me or arresting me, They're just like,
get that speed trap thing over there, all right?
Speaker 3 (52:14):
Should we wrap it down?
Speaker 1 (52:17):
Yes? What were you going to say that in.
Speaker 2 (52:21):
I was going to say that in twenty twenty six. Yes,
my goal, yes, is to start some new hobbies. One
is dance a dance, dance dance, and the other shall
be ordering off TikTok? Can that still be my host?
Speaker 1 (52:42):
Yeah?
Speaker 3 (52:42):
I'm really good at it.
Speaker 4 (52:44):
No, it's retail therapy. It's a therapy.
Speaker 3 (52:47):
It all costs seven dollars.
Speaker 4 (52:49):
Yes, it's a therapy.
Speaker 1 (52:51):
It is, and it arrives and it's like, oh, this
is for a child, and it's fell apart. Yeah, what's
the who cares? It was seven dollars?
Speaker 2 (52:58):
Yeah, except for that. How we got the Great Pacific
garbage Patch? Oh it is, I mean just people buying shit.
They don't mean throwing it away, like it's disappearing forever.
Speaker 1 (53:08):
Yeah, and that's where garbage patch kids come from.
Speaker 3 (53:12):
The stork brings.
Speaker 1 (53:14):
Garbage right, Yes, yes, my father told me that into
my twenties because he didn't want.
Speaker 4 (53:19):
To talk about sex.
Speaker 3 (53:20):
No one wants to talk about sex.
Speaker 1 (53:22):
Well, good luck with your hobbies. Made one of them
not be the flute. Thank you, and we're going to
go pick up our guests for next week's episode.
Speaker 4 (53:31):
You've been listening, Do you need a rise?
Speaker 3 (53:33):
Is a cliffhanger?
Speaker 1 (53:35):
Hyn to be continued, Hey are are? This has been
an exactly right production.
Speaker 3 (53:48):
Our Senior producer is Annalie Snelson.
Speaker 1 (53:51):
Mixed by Edson Choy.
Speaker 3 (53:52):
Our talent booker is Patrick Cootner.
Speaker 1 (53:55):
Theme song by Karen Kilgareth.
Speaker 3 (53:57):
Artwork by Chris Fairbanks.
Speaker 2 (53:59):
Follow the show on on Instagram, Twitter, and Facebook at
dinar podcast That's d y n ar Podcast.
Speaker 1 (54:05):
For more information, go to exactly rightmedia dot com.
Speaker 3 (54:09):
Thank you, Oh, You're welcome.
Hosts And Creators
Karen Kilgariff
Chris Fairbanks
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