514: My Own Personal Hell

Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Hey, y'all, Hi, Donald's chewing. What are you chewing? Donald?
I just have something too. I made some nachos for
myself and the kids. Who Speaking of eating, I had
some leftover steak and I chopped it up him And
speaking of eating, while on a show, I finally tuned

(00:23):
in finally for Daniel's twitch. Unbeknownst to me, I had
had a lot of jazz cabbage, so I was under
you were under extra scrutiny a fantastic Donald. Were you
able to get on because I was texting you you
gotta see this dude in action. I did, I wasn't
able to get on. But what you told me was

(00:45):
that he is not the same person that he Well,
he has a very he has a very big you know,
he's the lead of the show, so he has a
much bigger personality. I like that the lead of the show.
Well you are, you're in the foreground. It's your show
that you're very charming. Thank you. I have never I

(01:06):
have never watched a twitch anything before, so for me
it was I mean, I've seen them spoofed or I've
seen like clips of Beauty Pie playing games. Sure isn't
he the most famous one? He's a big one, yes,
very big. But one thing I learned Donald is that,
you know, we tease him from being like a cam
girl or a stripper. But it is analogous in some

(01:27):
ways in that there's a lot of lead up and teasing.
There's a lot of what do you call it edging,
there's a lot of edging god before before he plays
a game, so it is there's a lot of four play.
It starts with him eating you I want it's like,
what do you call that muck bang? Where the people
eat and you watch the meat? That was unique? But yes,

(01:49):
I was eating wait before wait wait wait, wait, the
name is unique already. Did you just say muck bang?
Isn't that what it's called? Yes? Can you explain to
the listeners who have no idea what mukbang is? What
muckbang is? Sure, muckbang is a video. It's m uk
b a n G if everyone wants to look it up.
And it's videos of people eating food, and sometimes that

(02:11):
food is requested by the fans, but it's just watching
people eat their food. Sometimes it's like I'm going to
this restaurant and watched meat, or sometimes it's my fan
wanted me to eat six hundred chicken nuggets and so
here we go. It's like that Asian. It's like that
Asian goad. I'd be eating some of the nasty. Should
have seen her eat, like the shit she bites into
its squirts and everything. Like. Yeah, and there's one woman
who ate a live octopus and it attacked her face.

(02:33):
That's what she gets, you, a live octopus? Yeah, exactly
what she get. Didn't she see my friend the octopus
or whatever? My octopus teacher jez Louise Joel. Have you
ever watched mukbang? Uh? Yes, but like in a it
was like a vice report or something like that. I've
never liked sought out be like, let me go watch

(02:53):
some people eat. It's not my thing, But what do
you think that people like about it? The sounds are sensual,
it's well for some people it's the ASMR, but for
other folks, it's just like a genuine like connectivity sort
of thing. It's like I'm gonna sit down and eat
with this person if that person's good at commentary. In between,
it's more of like okay, yeah, but a lot of

(03:15):
it's like it's a lot of it's like I was
about I think it's sexual too, because a lot of
it's like this, I'm gonna take a bite right now,
and I'm gonna put it to my mouth. Listen, here's Donald,
do some more with that food you're eating. Be louder,
be louder. Yeah, I think this is where if I
was into it, i'd get the lotion. I don't know

(03:39):
by so anyway, Donald, I'm watching. By the time I swallowed,
that's if you don't go yeah, now I haven't done
my job, then you're a really good muckbanger. I'm watching Daniel,
and I thought I tuned in for a video game,
but it opens with muck bang. He is eating a
sushi I believe indeed, and talking to his fans. There's
a lot of conversation. It's like a dreaming conversation on

(04:01):
the bottom of the screen. And then Stephanie comes in,
who I'd never seen in real life, and she's very beautiful. Daniel,
thank you, very charming. Daniel did very well. Stephanie came
in and she she had an appearance. Um, she came
to talk about something. I forgot what it was, and
then no, she was a bang with them. Stephanie did

(04:21):
not get into the munk Bang. That was solely Daniel's thing, indeed,
and the second I came I was like, I don't
know why I'm still watching this, But it turns out
there was gonna be a video game that was gonna
be played. There was eventually yea. Now, Daniel, how many
people roughly do you think watched you eat that sushi

(04:42):
or play that game? Um, when you came in, there
was about sixty five people watching at the time. I
think unique viewers there's probably about like eight hundred people
who come in over an entire stream. We gotta get
that up. Daniel. Well, I'm why aren't you people who
like Why if you're listening and you're one of these
people like Daniel that like to watch people pivideo games,

(05:02):
please watch his twitch because these numbers are not The
poor man is mukbanging and we need his numbers up.
He's showing you a lot. I really appreciate that. Thank you,
and working out. I just got a green screen, so
I've been at it. That's how you saw it, like
the there was like clouds behind me and stuff like that,
so you know we've been upping the production value. Yeah,
and you're sassy. I think your personality is a bit sassy, definitely,

(05:25):
because you know, you gotta be. You gotta be, you
gotta whip these people on the internet into place. Well,
you were very charming and I thought Donald would really
like it, and Donald probably would have. The video game
does tease. Yes, there's a lot of brimming. There's a
lot of like, pretty soon, I'm going to play the
fucking car game, but first I gotta eat this fucking role.

(05:49):
You gotta edge. You gottagine he's edging all sixty of
those people. Imagine the dude who's just like so excited
to watch Daniel play this car game and he gotta
wait for Dan Annill to eat dinner. Well, thank you
for coming to the stream. I appreciate that it was great.
Tell people where to watch it. For those of you

(06:09):
who need to watch it, you can find me on
twitch dot tv, slash dj Underscore d a n L
DJ Daniel on Twitch. That feels like that feels like
a lot for people to remember, but they will. It's
all good. Follow me on Twitter. I post about it
all the time. Enough, Daniel, we should probably get into
the show. Let's do it about show about a bunch

(06:35):
of dots and nurses. Now, I noticed that Donald hasn't
solved his echo problem. It doesn't sound like him. I

(06:58):
don't care. I'm at the beach and it's so hot.
I chose for sound reasons open doors instead of air conditioning,
and I will be occasionally patting my hold on. I'm sorry,
what's happening? Oh my goodness, Wilder has just entered with
a new hairstyle. That looks so beautiful. Your hair looks great, Wilder,

(07:19):
you can't hear us. Looks so pretty? Oh wow? Is
it your first blowout? Wilder? Tell her that it looks beautiful. Town.
She can't hear us. Hold On, Wilder, that looks so good.
It looks so pretty. Okay, is this you had your
hair blown out? No? Yeah, yeah, man, Yeah, we're about

(07:46):
to braid it. That's why we Oh, we're gonna it
looks so good. She had a new walk and everything
in here. Yeah, you want to show me, Kenny, show
us the new walk, Wilder. Now, Casey said that the
new haircut came with a with a new walk. We
gotta take the hell, you gotta take the headphones. Don't

(08:10):
say bye bye. Wow, it's beautiful. Wilder has her hair
straightened and they're gonna braid it. It's very pretty. I
think because Casey was here, Daniel, we should play the
Casey song, Casey come down here to do And that's

(08:37):
what okay, what a song? What a bob dude. This
girl got her hair blowed out and she is loving it.
She feeling herself. She's walking around with that was like
wave in her hair. She's got to say here her
barbies have. Now, yeah, well that's the thing barbies have
that hair. Mm hm. It really is. It really is

(08:59):
one of those things man like you'd go searching for
it as a parent and stuff, you know, to find
cartoons and stuff like that where the characters and you know,
nursery rhymes, nursery tales where the characters have hair like
your daughter, especially if your daughter's black. You know what
I mean, a lot of people don't understand how big
of a deal this is. Too little girls, you know
what I mean. And you know, for the longest, she

(09:21):
would talk about Elsa and Anna, and you know, she
would get upset because she couldn't get her hair to
look like that, and it was like what the fuck, Like,
where where do I look? Where? You know? And so
Casey found a bunch of great books about hair, and
you know, and you know, we've really built her confidence

(09:43):
into loving the fact that she's very unique. You know,
in her circle of friends, you know, she has something
that none of them have, and that's curls. And it's
just very funny to see her walking right now with
blowed out hair and you know, the look on her
fit like she's so happy. Right. I heard Casey said

(10:04):
that the haircut came with a new strut. Well, yeah,
well it's not even a haircut because we're gonna braid it.
We just blew it out so we could braid it longer.
And this girl is you know, she's in heaven right now.
I wish I wish I could, I wish I wish
you could stay like I wish you could blow it out.
And it stays like that on little kids, but the
second act, thing gets wet. It absorbs one ounce of

(10:30):
water right back into an afro. Yep. I love how
Daniel's like, yep, I I know, and I've had an afro,
you know me. So this episode it started off and
I was like, wow, this is gonna be a cock
like right off the back. D d First of all,
Jady's back in there, trying to be in this relationship

(10:51):
as he loves He just loves her so much, so
he's I know, but don't you think that would be
more painful? Like, you know, you're going through a break up,
was all you revenge? You break up, You're like not
seeing them anymore, and all of a sudden, you got
to be this close with this couple. I think he
gets turned on by it. I think there's a little
bit of a turn on because he keeps doing it. Well,
it's Keith that is really enjoying the lotion being spread

(11:13):
on him. He's biting his towel. Yeah, yeah, yes, in ecstasy. Yes, um,
I mean it's very very homely erotic. Yeah, but you
know it's Scrubs. But wait, hold on, it's not as
homo erotic as Dave. Let's let's let's I told you

(11:36):
you got you got to episode three. I take it
episode season two, episode three, and that has taken uh,
the bromance to because you know, I'm watching it and
I'm like, well, I know they're not gay, but Benny Blanco,
I mean, Benny Blanco has Dave's penis on his face

(11:58):
right now. Yeah, they're very comfortable. They're very comfortable with
their bodies, very much. Donald, we never took it that far.
I was like, that was that in my mind? I
was like, damn, Zach and I never went that far.
We never. I mean there's a scene in that episode
where they're showering together and it's I mean, they might
as well, they might as will be hooking up. But

(12:21):
he's got his face and his penis like literally looking
at him. He's like, it's well, you didn't watch it.
Well I am not currently, Oh watch shave you. I'm
sorry spoilers, Donald, all Right, I reviewed stuff for a living.
I'm still used to spoilers. It doesn't bother me at all.

(12:43):
I've heard nothing but great things. I plan it's in
the rotation. I will get there. But all right, so
it's really bizarre, man, it's really really such a bizarre
wild all right. So Elliott is taking her bikini top
strap off to not get a weird sun tan, which
is something a lot of women and do. I don't
really understand why, Like, um, you don't want that strap.

(13:03):
You don't want that strap shown. You don't want that
when you wear a dress. Oh, it's for when you
wear a dress the Bikini Lionel show. Okay, I never understood.
I'm like, who's gonna see your back where the strap
line wants? But it's open back dress, all right, So
we think that the JD's gonna rub lotion on her.
But he does indeed rub it all over Keith. Not

(13:26):
only does he rub it on Keith, he applies it
with such great force that Keith bites down on his towel. Yeah,
I mean, Keith is on the verge of having an orgasm,
it seems no. I mean, I think if there's anyone,
if there's anyone who's interested in in a man's hands
on him, it might be Keith because he's he's having
to bite down on the towel. Well. JD has a

(13:47):
lot of gay moments in this show, and one of
the one of the best ones comes later when they're
talking about the dude in the pediatrics the dude in pediatrics,
and all the women in the hospital are like, oh god, yeah,
And it cuts back and you see j D for
a split second with the rest of them going oh
God yeah, and they're talking about they're talking about they're

(14:09):
talking about a woman. Bro. Oh, I thought they were
talking about a man. No, don't get me wrong, j
D actually would have been hilarious if that's what I thought.
I was like, this is so we are so freaking
ahead of our time, right, that was hilarious though, But
what you're getting too far ahead? Um? All right? So
then we learned that j D is in fact um

(14:30):
robbing Chrisco on keiths back and he says, doesn't smell
like pie crust, and I say, that's the rhododendron, Keith.
Everybody knows they smell like pie when they bloom. Everybody
everybody knows they smell like when they bloom. And then
he gets as the worst, worst worst burn you can

(14:53):
get because I put Chrisco on his back. Yeah you
literally you we get watchie talkies and you call me
because Elliot's busy with Keith. Yeah, JD calls up Turk
and let's turk hear his back sizzle in the sun. Yes, yes,
now I remember. Now do you remember who had the
only really famous watchee talkie ever? Fucking Michael Knight from Yeah,

(15:18):
Michael Knight, And right right, I'm sorry for this show
to keep coming up. Everybody, but Michael Knight had a
watchee talkie that he could talk to Kit, could he
talk to other people? Are just kid? No, just Kit,
give me out of your Kit. Yeah, and Kit would
just come to life and turbo boost that fucking car
man could break through cement walls. Car was everything. Do

(15:40):
you remember when I told you I talked to him, Yeah,
at fucking Universal Studios. Yeah. Man, Kit was special in
my life, and it was special in everybody. Airwolf Kit,
Blue Thunder, you believe it or not, even though I
should had a Confederate flag on the top of it,
The dukes of Hazzard's car, you know what I mean,
all of those things were made the A Team Van.

(16:01):
You know, it's really cool that we were We were
on a show that paid homage or to all of
those shows from our youth, you know. Yeah, well all
the writers, all the writers were as geeked out all
that stuff as we were. You know, like the janitor
has an a team van now, yeah, for no reason.
Yeah no, well he has a reason. Cox destroyed his

(16:22):
other van, but he literally has an a Team van. Now.
I don't think there's still to this. Oh, actually there
are sort of modern day watchie talkies. I think, yeah,
that your your eye watch and shit like that. Yeah,
but I mean I literally take video with that ship.
I feel like once I saw like some tech conference
there was a thing that there was like a almost

(16:43):
like the Star Trek thing and communicator thing where you
could touch it. It connected to the bluetooth of your
phone and then you could talk to the matching person
knew if you were if you guys were heading the
same frequency or code or something, that was good. I
guess it'd be good if you're skiing or something. All
that I ship that we used to watch where they
would where they would look at somebody on the TV

(17:03):
while they talk to them, or a hologram while they
talk to him. That's all come to fruition with FaceTime
and and you know and apps like that. Yeah, so
we had like you know, sci fi. We are living
in some of it. It's just that it's not. I mean,
I would love to I would. I don't want to
pay a million. Like, who was the dude that was like,

(17:23):
I can't make it today When that rocket went up
in the air, When the Bathos rocket went up in there,
you think, what do you think he just got cold feet? Yeah? Absolutely,
He's like, I don't want to blow up today. Yeah.
He was like, I think he paid like thirty million
dollars and then he was like, you know what, I'm
actually busy today. Wow, but they still got his thirty
I think, yeah, yeah, I'm sure that's a nonrefundable take. Yeah.

(17:46):
I don't think you can get a refund um. All right, So, um, Turk,
let's talk about you're trying to have a baby. Okay,
he's trying to have a baby with Carla, and he's
not more if his semen are good or not. No,
he's fine with that. She's not sure because she's gone
through all of the she's done all of the work
as usual. Carla has set it up, so all Turk

(18:08):
has to do is bust, you know what I mean?
Like you think so you think I'm joking. My wife
sets it up so sets me up for success so much,
it's radicously. Carlo's very much like that. Yeah, where you know,
if I have to take the kids somewhere, everything is
laid out for me. So I thought you meant with sex.
I thought you meant with sex. Shit. I thought that

(18:31):
we ain't there yet. We ain't there yet. She lays
out all the cushions she lights the candles. We're not
there yet. Well, I'm working on that. She gets me
my belt. That's that helps my lower back be strong.
She lays out in an array of cockerings for me
to choose multiple different cocks rings, butt plugs. She polishes

(18:56):
the butt plugs. All right, so turkey thing before we
go forward, we're going to go into the Dollyears firm.
Don't worry. God, I don't want to go into this right,
But because this is a sex episode and has a
lot to do with us, what's gonna happen to all
the only Fans people after Only Fans shut down? Because
Only Fans is now going to go out of business?
Am I right? And searching you're you're absolutely right. It's

(19:18):
the same thing. This tumbler wasn't even designed around like
sexy images, and when they were like no more X
rated content, they went from like a billion dollar property too.
I think they sold it for like a million or two. Right, Uh,
So let's be honest, Only Fans is going to go
bye bye? Like yeah, there's no why do you think?
Why do you does anyone know why they made that decision?

(19:40):
If that's like their main because credit card companies are
starting to ban any type of sex work from being
charged on their cards. Like MasterCard was like, Yo, you can't.
We're not going to allow you to use your card
on only fans while they allow and it's still called
sex work if the person is just doing something visual
for ones entertainment. Yeah, yeah, I just shouldn't know that

(20:02):
video content was a sex worker until this moment. Yeah,
you're selling sex and you know in some fashion, what
about if you're making people watch you eat sushi. Well
that's the thing. It's a dude, it's the exact but
it's the exact same thing. Though, because somebody out there
got hot off of that. Somebody was like, damn, the

(20:23):
way he's fucking eating that tuna role is getting me going,
you know what I mean, you made jokes about it
the whole time. No, listen, you know what's gonna happen.
Somethingy're gonna have to stay on only fans but hide
the fact that they're doing sex work. Like like, see,
like Daniel's not gonna get kicked off for doing his thing,
but if he were pretending to play the video game
but really masturbating the sensors to catch him, maybe you

(20:50):
would get so fast. One of his one of his
one of one of the kids that watches him twitch
would be like, oh my god, all right, I was
just trying to help the only fans. Well, so where
are they gonna go? Do? Well? Does does anyone know
where they're all gonna go? Zach, They're they're already scouting
new websites to where they can go. I don't don't worry.
You will have a new website soon. Let's create one.

(21:14):
Do you want to? I mean, now, hey, you know what,
maybe you and I want only fans now because sexual
content is over and we nobody, nobody's gonna want to
watch us not do sexual content. Okay, yeah, we'll get
yelled at by like that one actress who got yelled at, Yeah,
see you, and they're gonna want to see me and
you rub So Bella Thorne really made out well then
because she she got um all that money and then

(21:37):
she's like, oh sorry, I can't do anything you can hate,
but she made that bag. Well, you're allowed to um
show nudes, you just can't show sexual activity. Is that
where it is? They came out the day after and
they were like, yeah, you nothing, no sexual nudity, and
people were like, girl, what it's a very confusing new policy. Uh.

(22:00):
Now people are starting to try to attack the credit
card companies and Stride encourage them like you could just
support sex work and make money, And I don't see
what the problem is. It'll be interesting to see how
it shakes out. But I definitely think that in an
attempt to gain more money, they're gonna undercut themselves, because
who is going to only fans for anything other than

(22:20):
sexual content? So any kind of sense. All I'm saying
is in this wildly capitalist society, we don't see ways
to make money and just go, oh yeah, do more
of that. It's like, why is it taking so long
to legalize weed across the country. Why is the idea
of selling sex online that is truly not hurting anybody
all of a sudden, Like, m I don't know about that.
There's like so much money to be made there. And

(22:42):
to me, that's the part where I'm just like, y'all,
everybody just wants to make more money. Why not just
get it? Get the bag. Everybody wants the bag. The
bag is right there, the bag is right here. It's like,
just go get it. The next site that opens up,
that's like, yeah, we welcome all sex work. They're gonna
be like great, I'm a billionaire. Now it's like, why
don't we start the fake doctors, real friends, sex worker

(23:03):
video chat club? Yeah? Start, I think we should start
the video chat club. That's fucking nuts, dude. We'll probably
have to check with I Heeart. I don't know if
it's in our contract. Do you think I heart would accept?
Can you imagine calling will hey? Will we have a
new idea? We have a new idea? Will I know? No,

(23:24):
it's not another hounday ad will listen? What if we
reopen our own sex work channel? Fake boobies real fans
there you go? Oh my god? Yes? But why I
gotta be fake boobs? Can't it just be a play
on the name of the show? Donald, No doubt you fake? Yeah? Please,

(23:44):
it's called fake boobies, real boobies, real vulva, real boobs.
Dani'll see if that website's taken. Right now, can we
get back to the show, please? You gotta got off
the rails. Okay, so Cox has been named the best
doctor and he wants everyone to call him the best doctor. Right,

(24:05):
it's clear that he's the best doctor too, right, and
everyone's got the whole staff lined up. And it appears
that he's saying, if you don't say you are when
he says who's the best doctor, that he's got some
agreement where the janitor will stick his mop up your
But yes, yep, that's what happened. Yeah, that's exactly that's
the end that's in the show. And they're not really

(24:26):
joking about it. I mean, the janitor does they do it?
They do it? It does it to Lonnie? Right, yeah,
twice twice two times, and and and and and Lonnie
said it, but he didn't say it loud enough. I
don't know much about HR departments, but I feel like
the janitors threatening and following through un shoving a room
up your butt probably doesn't fit within the rules. Yeah,

(24:48):
I'm gonna, I'm gonna, I'm gonna, I'm gonna agree with
you on Batman. Yes, Okay, now, um now, Turk and JD.
Appears that the Watchee Tuckies are on all the time
because we're both eavesdropping on each other's lives. Yes, and
I you say that you want to do the Dolphin,
can you explain, now we've cleaned the dolphin up, we

(25:11):
probably can't at least describe the dolphin even on here. Well,
we can't describe the dolphin. And we'll decide later if
we're gonna cut it out or not. Okay, we'll probably
cut it out. But Donald, explain what the real dolphin
is in in the most and the most in the
most elegant way and tactful way you can. You're asking
me to do that? Yeah? Maybe, Oh, I think we

(25:32):
can't say. We'll just know what it is. We'll beep
it out. Okay. So in words television show the dolphins
your words, he slides into his woman like a dolphin. Right, Yeah,
that's in the television show. Yes, in real life? What's

(25:54):
the dolphin? In real life? Donald? The dolphin is when
you are having relations with your said partner. Yes, and
you're using using using you have you must be a
must be a male and female for it to work.
I believe in and the style known often used by
k nines. Right in the right, So you have relations

(26:17):
in the style often used by k nines exactly, And
it's when you decide to back up out of K
nine situation and choose an alternate route. And choose an
alternate route mainly balloon not or yes or and then
your your your partner. The female in this situation turns

(26:39):
around you, shaking her head and says, oh, I don't
know if you can keep that on the show and
still keep sponsors. But all right, so that's the real dolphin.

(26:59):
Donald did an NBA version of it. Yes. Now, this
was written by Bill's assistant Aaron. Do you remember Aaron
good old Aaron Bola Jolo. Yeah, great guy who was
Builds assistant for many years, and this was his opportunity
to write a script after five seasons on the air.
He is and was a writer and directed by Adam Bernstein, who,

(27:21):
as are, one of our favorites who directed the pilot.
We've given him lots of shout outs and credit also
told us who also told us the dolphin joke? Did
it really come from him? Yeah? I did. Oh I've
known that joke for for twenty years and I never
knew where it started. And you're saying, Standam Bernstein, thank
you Adam Bernstein for sharing that with us. Now we
cut to Turk crying with a backpack on in the

(27:43):
field position in the bathroom. What happened turk Um Turk
is told that backpacks aren't necessarily for no purses purses, right,
his backpack looks like a purse, and therefore this is
one of those episodes. It's also where it's like, I
don't know if that would fly nowadays, Like, well, I

(28:04):
don't know. It's nothing wrong with a nice merse nowadays. Yeah, well, okay,
in whatever, you feel like the joke would have taken
a different turn. Yeah, I feel like you would be like,
I'm rocking this backpack? How dare you right? Right? But Donald,
you're not going to do the thing where you wear
the fanny pack? O? No, no, no, no, no no. Daniel,
do you do that? I feel like you might do that.
Do you wear the fanny pack over your chest? Yeah?

(28:25):
I do sometimes? Does you? Does your fanny packs say
Supreme on it too? No? It doesn't. It says raising
canes the chicken place. Okay. Something struck me as Daniel
as a potential um fanny pack across chess guy because
he's always prepared, danel, do you have a Supreme T shirt?
Do you have a Supreme T shirt? I have not

(28:46):
a single piece of Supreme clothing. Don't you feel like
the people wearing fanny packs across their chests. Should should stop?
Shouldn't this be an intervention? Absolutely not? I don't think so.
I think I think what's in the fanny pack? You
should uh, you should wonder about, you know, because why not?
Why not just put the fanny pack over your fanny
because it doesn't look as cool. It's the utility looks

(29:07):
like you know, utility ready a Chewbacca. It's like the
Chewbacca strap across. Are you also not into the bulletproof
vest fashion that's happening now? I think, whoa what? Whoa?
Hold on? Bulletproof? People are wearing bulletproof vests in the street.
Bulletproof I don't know. They look like yeah, but they

(29:32):
look like kevlar vest. But some are made of like
plush cotton and they have like everything is giant pocket
right now, it's the move. I don't know if you
can legally wear a bulletproof vest. If you're just anybody,
you can you do no duel? Look that up. I
don't think anybody and everybody is legally Maybe it's a

(29:52):
state thing that's fucked up if you can't wear a
bulletproof vest. But but then people could have guns. I
don't know. Let's find out the answer. Joe Well has
her looking face on. In California, civilians can purchase an
us A bulletproof vest unless he or she has been
convicted of a felony, which is wow, because if you've
been convicted of there's a chance you might need one
more than others. Yeah, wild, well, okay, I guess it's

(30:17):
a state rule. For some reason, I remember hearing that
you weren't You weren't allowed to wear one unless you
how to read here. You're certainly right if you're a felon, right,
But for some reason I thought it was like a
deterrent for people to go rob banks, because like, no,
you're not legally around. I don't know, m I say,
I'm wrong that I don't, I don't mean, or maybe
there's another state that I don't know, So I um so.

(30:39):
Jamie and Pediatrics Dowland is whom Elliott would sleep with.
And then all the women who hear her name moan
when they think of this woman in pediatrics. But so
did the men too, don't they? Or at least you do?
Oh yeah, I clearly have a crush on Jamie and
Pediatrics as well. Turk's voice is always higher when he's nude,

(31:00):
and then we cut to you totally naked, who's not wrestler?
Stone called Steve Auston, Stone Cold Steve Auston's bicep, which
is very large, fortunately, is uh is blocking your giblets? Yeah,
it's blocking the junk. Trunk the junk. Now do you
remember shooting that? Did it take a while to line up?
Stone called Steve Auston to block your junk? Well, there's

(31:22):
not a lot of junk, Zach, so it was kind
of easy for Stone Cold Steve Auston too cover. What
do you mean junk? What do you mean? What do
you mean? What do I mean? I lost you? You
have such a big penis and that that's just that's toy,
ye go on. Okay, I think it was as I

(31:43):
think it was a I think it was a perspective thing.
They put Steve Stone called very close to the camera
so that your eel could be well hidden. Um. Under
New York state law, it's against the law to wear
a body armor during the commission of a violent crime. Okay,
well I get that one too, Joel. These are very
specific rules for when you can wear right. You're allowed

(32:05):
you you're allowed to wear a body armor as long
as you don't commit a violent crime with it or
are a felon. So far, let's just keep looking Joe. Um,
all right, we're gonna come right back and talk about
how Carla has some device. I have no idea if
it's real to get semen out of churn. We'll be
right back and we're back. Is that we're back and

(32:29):
we're back? Is that a real device? Does anybody know? No,
I've heard of the pump before, where you stick your
junk in a pump and you pump it up so
it can get real big, or you try to make
it big or I know, But that contraption. Was that
a joke contraption? I think I'm pretty sure it was
a joke contraption. There's no way you can can you
can steal semen from somebody without them knowing it other

(32:52):
than you? Are you blindfolded? Yes? He was blind? She blind?
I mean she had this device and she I don't
think you can do it. I don't think you can
do I don't think that's I don't think it's well.
I'm sorry to funk up your Google, but will you
look at there's a device where someone can pull semen
out of someone without them ejaculating. Phone, I got you.

(33:14):
I'm on my non work computer. I can look this up. Okay, yeah,
we don't want to get these guys in trouble at iHeart, Daniel.
Is there a device that would would would would extract
semen without ejaculation and would it look anything like? There's
no way that's possible, dude, There's no way, all right,
because the semen look at Joel's face. Where did you
find you all? Something called a RAM ejaculator. I literally

(33:38):
saw the exact same thing. It's the top answer when
I searched the semen stealing device seen. This thing is
just a it's just a I don't know. It just
looks like a jildo on a machine that's gonna piston. Basically, Oh,
it's on a piston. Yeah yeah, I don't think that's
that's gonna do that. That's that's that's what a woman.

(33:58):
It sounds like to me, well, or anyone who's a receiver, Donald,
I would just like to I'm just I'm just gonna
share my screen real quick. I just love that it
says equipment that works the RAM ejaculator. Wow, A smooth
probe that is inserted in the rectum of the of
the is the low voltage impulse? Oh, this is Oh,

(34:20):
this is this is actually okay for first who use
it dot dot dot every day. This is this might
be for a cow, This is for an animal. This
is yeah. Wait, don't get rid of it. I want
to read a go back. I want to read what
it said. This is not for a human today, it's
for a ram. I thought it was a typo. It says,
a smooth probe that is inserted in the rectum of

(34:43):
the ram, pressing the Pressing the button produces a low
voltage impulse that causes the RAM to ejaculate. Semen is
then collected in a sterile container. For this is someone's job, dude,
to fucking ass fuck a ram and collect the semen.
You listener, who are complaining about your job, It's not

(35:05):
that God. Here's the picture of the person handling it.
What is this? What is this? It's very expensive. It's
for eighty six if you want one. It doesn't look
it doesn't look that big. It is interesting that electric
pulses in an anus rectum cause the ram to ejaculate.

(35:28):
Would that cause a human to ejaculate? We gotta try it, Dan,
don't get one heart paper this. Let's get that emailed.
Will go, Oh my god, well will you see it? Well,
I know were I know. We're negotiating our contracts for Yeah. Well,
we want freedom, we want freedom, Will, and we want

(35:48):
we want the ability to stick a ram in tunnel,
rock paper scissor, rock paper scissor a mere you, rock
paper scissor. I'm gonna put it. I'm gonna stop, I'm
gonna stop sharing. All right, let's focus back on the show. Guys.
Come on. Okay, so you're crying. You're crying in the baths.

(36:14):
I had him a mosa. I must admit this is
the first time I've ever had a tiny buzz on
this show. Bullshit, I've watched this show. No, when we
did a live show. Dude, I watch you drink wine
before on the show without the live show though. Okay, no,
I'm not you. All right, listen crying in the bathroom again.
And we see all your old tattoos which are now gone, right,

(36:35):
didn't you have them removed? I did. I went to
doctor tattoo Off and it worked. Years are pretty gone, right,
but they take a lot of sessions, right, how many sessions.
It takes. Well this one. I only did like six
sessions with this one, but I was supposed to do
twelve and I just didn't finish it. He had a Superman.
There was a Superman and then my name underneath it,

(36:56):
like I'd like I so I wouldn't forget it, I guess.
I mean, I don't know how old were you when
you got those tattoos? Eighteen? And I remember I wanted
it so bad. I wanted a tattoo so bad because
I thought it was sexy and girls would like it.
And really, at the end of the day, it was
you know, I had to paint it up for so
many movies that I was in, you know, and television

(37:18):
shows and Scrubs was the first show that I was on. Whatever, like,
we don't give a shit, just led it be. It's
interesting though, because we never address it on Scrubs ever.
Why it says a day of shoon on Turk's arm, Yeah,
well I says shoom. It just says shoom. I would
just says shoon. Yeah, I'm not going to get the
shoot and taken off my lower back. I dare you,
you dare I mean to get shown on my on

(37:39):
my body somewhere. I dare you to get it on
your lower back. I don't want to tramp stamp, with
all due respect to people off tramps times. But what
if I what if I get like shoon on my arm?
I mean, that's very nice of you, I would I
It's not like we're gonna break up. You know, sometimes
couples don't want to get tattoos of each other because
they could break up. But we're not going to break up.
You know where. I think you should get my name tattooed,

(38:03):
taint shaft. I think taint will hurt most. I want
it to hurt. Alright, alright, come on, come on, all right, listen.
Laverne gossiping. Laverne and the Elevator made me laugh so
hard when she finds out that Turkey shooting blanks or

(38:24):
it's a possibility that Turkey is shooting. And how about
every time they go around the gossip circle, I'm in
there twice. Come around the other side, because I'm getting
everybody gossiping. Yeah, we also learned the janitor does indeed
hit Kelso with the broom on his head. Kelso then
knocks on his head and we hear a clink and
someone says that he is a skull like a mountain goat. Yes,

(38:47):
I don't know why the janitor wasn't fired for hitting
Kelso on his head with a broom. You know, there
are a lot of reasons for people to get fired
in this hospital, and let's just be honest. I know. Well,
we also learned that Kelso has a mistress that was
once a lifeguard and she's the one who recently gave
his wife's CBR. That shit had me rolling, fucking yeah,

(39:17):
you know this this show didn't have a lot of
jokes in it though. It's what I you know, It's
not as wacky as some of the episodes we've done
so far, I know, but it was. It was a
very odd one. It was very odd. Okay, the janitor
has insane aim. He throws a melon over the hospital. Well,
now he must have sonar too, because he hears the

(39:40):
sound through the phone, takes a melan from nowhere and
tosses it over the hospital and hits JD in the head. Yes,
a one in one nine gazillion chances. The chances of
that happening are astronomical. Dude. Well, he's got a good arm,
even if he didn't have act. You're see, he threw

(40:01):
a melan over a hospital, right. I don't think over
a building. I know, I could not. I don't. I
don't think. I don't think four story building. Yeah, four
story hospital could could your fanciest quarterback do it? Probably not? Yeah?
Because it's high, Yeah, it's still it has to it
has to maintain the distance of the hospital in the

(40:23):
air before it before it starts to come down. Yeah,
you know what I mean. Yeah, Well that happened. And
then um, he knocks me out right, yes, And then
I say on the watchie talkie, you're firing blanks. LaVerne's
in the elevator. She hears it, everybody hears it. And
now it's a conversation. I repeat, are you firing blanks? Right?

(40:46):
And I'm like, stupid watchie talkie And I get rid
of the watchie talkie. And this is how the janitor
gets it, finds it in the trash. That's really that's
fucked up that you so easily gave up on our
watchie talkies. Well, you know it's proven enough, but a
headache for Turk so far, you know. Okay, now let's
get into this sh sperm donor scene, the audience has

(41:09):
to know something, and it's my father's birthday to day
he's passed away, but he was very very dear to me,
So happy birthday, Dad, Happy birthday. And secondly, he and
my stepmother are were visiting this day and they are
in background in the sperm donor waiting room. What do
you call that? It's not a sperm donor. What do

(41:30):
you call that where you're the spanker bank. I don't
know if that's where it's called where you go to
test to see if you've got good sperm. Oh, I
don't know, but I'm guessing it's a spec fertility clinic
or something like that. Yeah. Anyway, the funny thing is
neither one of them was of an age where they
would have any reason to be in fertility clinic. So
what's your rationalization for my my, my, my stepmother and
father being there? They were scorting their son. Yeah, I

(41:53):
thought they were dropping off their son or something like that.
Or it just doesn't feel like the kind of place
you'd want your parents. No, it's not. But I do
love the fact that JD has several ways of masturbating.
Since he's now newly uh, well, not newly, but since
his since he's living in Elliott's house and he has

(42:16):
to find a way to Yes. Now, JD teaches Turk
the Stranger, which is one of the most genius masturbation
skills I've ever heard in my life. I think it's me.
We didn't make it up, right, that's a famous thing,
the stranger, or do we make it? It has to
it has to be something that's happened before. Like somebody,
I know, somebody was like, had you heard of the
stranger outside of scrubs? Joel? Had you honestly think the

(42:40):
stranger was the first time I heard of it? It
became vernacular in my friend group, I think because of Scrubs. Okay, Joel,
are you still there? Well? I I you hadn't you had?
Or have head? Not head? Okay? All right, well there

(43:03):
you go. Donald. Even if it wasn't our originally our joke,
we introduced um the world to the concept of the stranger.
Have you tried the Stranger? No? I don't think it's
possible to really execute with a dead arm. It's not
a dead arm, it's a dead hand either. I don't
know what you're doing with a with a dead hand
and trying to complete the like one side can't feel it,

(43:24):
but one side can you know what I mean? Right?
But how is it? How are you able to because
you can you use you can use the other side
to hold you hold the wrist with the working hand. No,
you don't, you use so you're just sort of throwing
your dead hand at your Do do I need to say?
Do I need to get into this? Well we can
bleep it if it's too bad. But what do you

(43:45):
in your mind as a pressure sensor? What you science?
Just happened? What? All? Right? Anyway? My favorite line I
think I think I improved this one, Donald, But it's
my favorite line of the scene. Which is or any

(44:07):
of the reading materials in there available for those of
us out here? Can you get ad live that? I
remember this scene because your parents were there that day. Yeah,
I do remember this scene. And the woman gives me
a look like, no, you're not allowed to look at
porn in the waiting room? Right? What about when the
janitor contacts me on his watching talking goes, hey, JD,

(44:30):
this is the black surgeon that you always hang out
with out come outside to the ramp dog. But dude,
he gets like fucking wildly coyote. He's got it's gonna
drop a monitor on my head. I mean I could
kill me. Yeah, that could kill you. He has a
freaking computer monitor in his hand and he's waiting for
you to walk out the door so he could smash

(44:51):
this thing over your skull. It's full on Roadrunner and coyote.
He's gonna smash a monitor on my head and I'll
be dead. He wasn't urd you. Yeah, that's a murder, AJD.
It's the black doctor you've always hang out with. Come
out to the ramp Dog. So you're a fifth wheel.

(45:11):
You're not You're no longer the third wheel. You're now
the fifth wheel. Yes, JD is at the end of
the show. I noticed you. I'm about right before you.
Um Judy comes right before carl It comes in to
help you. They the camera goes off a stack of
pornographic videotapes and the top ones, the top ones, they're
obviously fake, so they could be cleared to be on

(45:33):
the show. But the top ones title is sizzle. Let's callback?
Is that a callback? Is that a callback to the
beginning to what you don't say? Sizzle? His back was
sizzling like bacon oho erotic scene. Oh oh no, there's

(45:54):
a woman in a big bathing. That's funny, good, good thinking.
But no, it's just probably like a word looks sexual.
That isn't that they could actually show, you know, on
a on a porn quote unquote porn tape. Sizzle sizzle.
And then you say to Carla, I'm about to build
this up. All right, I'm sorry this episode is so

(46:15):
sexual everyone. It's about it's about it's about it's about sex.
Though it's about sex, I'm sorry everybody. Like Elliot has
an intern who she's and she's abusing the power of
you know, her status at the hospital so she could
take the intern home and fuck all the time, you know,
like that's her goal, her whole at this whole episode,
her thing is how can I get Keith out so

(46:37):
I can have sex with him at home so we
can fuck. Right, But then they do reveal and Jad
helps him out because he's so fucking weird um that
Keith is the best doctor. So he finally comes around
on Keith a little bit and says, no, it's not Yes,
it might be annoying to you that Elliot's constantly choosing Keith.
But he's the best doctor, so shut up, right, and

(46:58):
he is the best out of them. Yeah, and then
Travis is really starting to come out of his show.
You know what I mean, he's really we talked about
it last week, but you know, and how he had
to play catch up really fast, but he's really starting
to enjoy his time won the show and this I
think that's why he lasted so long on the series. Um, yeah,

(47:21):
well he's great, He's the perfect He's Travis. Couldn't have
done this better. He did a really job. Now at
the end, JD pulls a full shining on the janitor
and he's stuck in the walk in freezer. Yes, freezing
to death. Yeah, we're not playing games anymore in this hospital.
We're really trying to kill each other. Well, he had
a fucking computer and he was gonna smash it. I

(47:44):
never knew, right, I never knew right that you put
him in a freezer for the rest of his life.
Do you notice that when he's in the freezer, right,
I say, on the watch, he talkie something like I
forgot what I say, but he's got he's before you
see him frozen, but he's holding a hammer. Yes, he
was gonna meet me in there and kill me with
the hammer. He was gonna fucking bash your skull. I

(48:05):
never noticed Ford and presumed innocent. I really never knew
that the games had gone to this level of like death.
I didn't. I don't recall it going that far either,
but um, well they were stepped up in this episode
for sure. For sure. How hot is it where you are?
It's so hot? I want to take this a conditioning
And well, I was deciding because I'm in a hot room, right.

(48:27):
I thought Daniel would be upset about the ac noise,
so I said, it's fine, I'll open the door. But
now it's hot as balls in this room. We could
at least see what it sounds like. No, but for
the people, I'll just show my my breasts. There we go.
Do we have a caller? A caller? All right? Are
they gonna be okay? Seeing me shirtless? You think let's

(48:48):
let's go to break and we'll decide that. Okay, we'll
be right back with a hilarious, genius, spectacular caller and
uh maybe Zach b you'll be shirtless. And if if
the callers are right that I mean to golf my shirt.
We'll see how they feel and remember bad. All right, Dan, Joel,

(49:12):
bring us a guest that we can talk to. We
gotta college games. Allow you can talk some you know,
like a botta spoke some jazz, maybe talking about the episode.
So come on, Joelle, let's get the show. Ladies and gentlemen.

(49:32):
Give it up for Douglass Fuck up you good doom
dingo do ge. There he is, I Douglass Walker. Hey,
how's it? He's saying, he's still going already froze Donald,
froze in while saying your last nick. But he's moving out.

(49:52):
That Wow, what's good? That was some mimeshit right there.
I could have could I could have still kept going
to you know, on Russia, Donald, Russia, on Russia, Shanna.
There's a Jewish tradition where the uh someone will blow
the shofar, which is the rams horn. It's just an
old tradition. Uh and uh and they and they have
a thing where they go to kiagadla. And that means

(50:14):
the chauffar blower is going to see how long he
can hold one powerful note. And all I'm saying is
you would be a good chou far blower because you
can really blow a wind a long time. Thank you, sir,
Thank you very sorry. I know that was a long
way around the block, but the the people that went
to Hebrew School and Temple understand. Welcome to the show,
Douglas Walker. How are you? I'm good? How are you

(50:36):
doing good? Where are you calling from? I live in Toronto.
I'm originally from Scotland, Okay, Toronto in the house, one
of my favorite cities. Now, you live in a very
white space. Um so yeah, unless that's yeah, that's a
white space. But you have a professional microphone. What are
you a singer? Podcaster? What do you do? I'm an actor,

(50:58):
um so I've and yeah, we do like a bit
of voice of our little bits here like auditions here
and there and right, and I also use it to
play D and D and all that sort of stuff.
So this is like the spare room where like like
self tapes and the wife can kind of I come
away to the corner to play D and D and

(51:19):
she can kind have some peace. Now, for those of
you who aren't actors, self tapes or when an actor
reads the senior On the old days, everybody used to
go into a casting office and audition in person. And
even before the pandemic, it started to become easier for
people to submit tapes of themselves to the casting director.

(51:39):
And so if you're an actor these days, you have
to have a place in your house where you can
set up a video camera and a microphone and record
yourself doing the audition. And you need someone to read
with you. I imagine does your wife read with you
when you're auditioning for things? She used to read with
me before we had our baby. And now have a
friend who kind a zim zen and he'll like read
over zim or if we can be in Parson one

(52:02):
day with them, we'll we'll do. Yeah. I'm about to
start seeing some auditions for my new film, and I'm
very excited. I'm nervous. Are you going? Um? I think
I'll zoom for callbacks and stuff. But these are just
the people's first submissions. And the reason I'm saying I'm
nervous is I've been I've been working on the script
for so long and I haven't heard anyone other than

(52:22):
myself say a word of it out loud. Florence a
little bit. Florence and I read a few things together,
but I haven't heard anyone who's appropriate for any of
the roles read yet. So those tapes are just starting
to come in, and it's so thrilling to watch talented
actors bring what you wrote come to life for the
very first time, but also scary. I can imagine, yeah,

(52:44):
I can imagine that be very vulnerable, like something that
you've kind of written yourself, and then just i'd have
someone else to read it for you. It is because
because because you're very you're very vulnerable, and you're like,
I don't I think this is good, but I need
to hear like a talented actor to say it, so
have me believe that it's good. All right, Doug, what

(53:04):
kind of questions you got for us today? I've got
a couple of questions. Um, Obviously, like as I was saying,
I'm an actor, so um. I the episodes that I
found like really really interested in are the ones where
like you have guests on that kind of sort of
talk about the process when it comes to like you know,
film and stuff. And I do I do mostly like

(53:26):
like theater, like mostly musical theater. But over the last
like since I came to Canada, I've been getting more
auditions for like film and TV and stuff. What kind
of musical theater do you do? Um, I've in the past,
I've done Avenue Que, Jersey Boys. Moamy, my friend that's
with me, Um has been in Jersey Boys. Actually we

(53:48):
should have Preston come in and sing us out Donald
because he's with me, and uh, he could sing a
little something. It's a great and Douglas could probably harmonize
with him. But anyways, it's that show that it's one
of the show. Like normally if I do like a
contract of a musical, like I can't listen to the
soundtrack after doing it for months, but like Jersey Boys
is still the one that you can. Everybody loves Jersey Boys. Yeah,

(54:10):
like four seasons and music is so good. My mom
loves that musical. I never saw the musical, did you
donal No, I'm credited of being in the movie or
something like that on IMDb, but I've never seen him.
You are yeah, Okay, I'm sorry, I'm Douglass. Continue with
your question. I'm sorry. Yeah, So, like um, you know,
like John c mcginniy came on and talked about it,
like his process and like the things like he writes

(54:31):
bits of poetry and he like puts bits of poetry
in and stuff like that. Fascinating, And yeah, I was
just wondering, like, you guys have not really talked that
much about like your process, so like sort of paper
to paper to screen, Like what do you do to
kind of sort of get yourself ready for a role.
I think memorization is key, Preparation is key. Um. I

(54:56):
used to not think that way, but I do think
that way now. Um. I think the best you're ever
going to do, I mean is getting to know it
so well that you don't have to think about it. Yeah,
I think that's the I think that's the hardest thing
is because you know, on a TV show like this,
we were getting the scripts last minute and we were
just doing the best we good in memorizing. But when

(55:16):
you're really trying and it's and it's I don't mean
we weren't trying, just mean we had to deal with
that situation. But when you have time and it's a
really important role, it's a very hard role, or it's
a very tough audition. Nothing for me can start until
I have it so memorized that I'm not in my
head at all about what the next line is. So
it's just sort of and then then you then you

(55:39):
start to fold in what a lot of people I
think forget is, Oh, now I need to be coming
up with these thoughts for the very first time. And
I think one of the most important things for actors
to know is you've never had thought this before, right
when you're when you're when you're doing a scene, your
character has never thought one of those moments before. Yeah,

(56:03):
it's all brand new. You know. We need to see
those thoughts coming to you and getting the idea for
what you're about to say, just like we knew in
real life. You know, we don't just all just rattle off.
Now obviously it's heightened in a in a dramatic or
a comedic way that we're just so quick witted and
for example in Scrubs that we always have the best joke.
Of course, but you still need to, even in a
broad comedy like this, sell that these are these thoughts

(56:24):
are new ideas because you've got them so well memorized
that you're not searching for them. And then and then
you can play with the fun of having them come
to you. I tried to take the shortcut, and you know,
a lot of people make fun of me and stuff
like that. But a lot of the reasons why I
didn't read scripts, and this is it's obvious an excuse,

(56:45):
but mostly mostly true. I didn't read scripts and didn't
learn lines because I wanted it to feel fresh and
brand new. I got lazy after some time too, I
think it was lazy. Well, no, there's that too, But
you know, there was also the fact that I like
the fact that Turk didn't know if he wasn't connected
to it. I didn't think he should. I I should

(57:06):
know what was going on in the in the in
the story. Um, that's not a good thing, at least
if you're a young actors. For myself, that didn't That
didn't work. It's better to be so prepared that you
don't like so that when the director says, hey, can
you do it this way, you're able to do it

(57:27):
without thinking about, well, what line should I on? You
know what I mean? The minute that you don't have
to worry about what you're saying, it's the moment you're
able to open up and explore. Really what you're doing
is what I found, And then I think that the
next thing I try and do, particularly if it's something dramatic,
and you know, communic is a bit different. But how
how what in my life relates to this and how

(57:50):
can I tap into? I may I most likely have
not had the experience of the character I'm trying to
be um, But what's closest in my life that I
can really tap into and replace, you know why with
x UM. So when I'm passionately talking about that thing,
it will be as real as that similar thing is

(58:12):
in my heart. UM, and I'll be able to convey
it as well because I've sort of replaced the two things.
I think that's been very helpful to me too. I
had a similar I had a similar experience and theater
school we did a Sun Time's Company. Yeah, and I
got to play Bobby, which is amazing. But that's a
great role. So when it came to like duding like
being alive at the end, wege you managed to get

(58:34):
some sort of like emotional recall with it to the
point I was like, oh no. Then they then suddenly
you can't sing it without crying, and then you have
to like and then you can't sing when you're crying,
so you have to unless you're Ben plays He's mastered
that that guy. If you ever saw Dear Evan Hanson,
did you ever see him do it? I never, I
never saw it live. No, I never saw anything like
it in my life. And I don't know if they're

(58:56):
singing live in the movie. This is going to turn
into a quick You're Evan Hanson the movie ad. But uh,
you know, Ben got teased a little bit online for like, oh,
he looks too old to play a high school kid now,
but come on, there's so many movies where people, I mean,
look at almost every show where people don't look like
they're really high school kids. But but the reason is
that no one could do what Ben Platt did with

(59:17):
that that song. He was those that music. He was
sobbing every night, eight shows a week. He'd be sobbing
with Payne and singing with the most beautiful voice you've
ever heard. Um, that boy could sing, man. It's well
known fact that that boy could really sing. Man Head's
voice is incredible. Everybody knows, anybody who anybody who's like, nah,
he's I is lying. Yeah. If you only think Ben

(59:40):
Platt's I, you haven't seen this man, They're lying voice
is sick. Yeah. But anyway, we should give him a
shout because he has a new album and he's a
good Uh, he's a good man. Um it's called Reverie.
So we let we love Ben Platt here and pick
up his new album, Reverie. Um all right, Doug. Next question,
h all right, this is do you mind if I

(01:00:01):
take off my T shirt? You do? You man? No,
I'm at the beach, okay, and I turned off the
air conditioning because of Daniel. He's very, very aggressive when
it comes to sound design, although he hasn't insisted that
Donald gets sound buffers in his Echoe office. He's fixing,
he said, he knows how to fix it. That's okay.
But I'm sweating, so I don't worry. I'm wearing pants. Okay,

(01:00:22):
that's fine. Before I before it gets my just looks ridiculous.
This looks ridiculous, doesn't it. I'm sitting him naked. Let
me look at that. Look looking good, dud Not in
fun of Doug, not in front of Dug. All right, Doug,

(01:00:43):
next question, Um, yeah, okay, So this is for everybody.
There is there a piece of art, whether it be
like a book, a play, a sculpture, a painting, anything
that you would like to take and make a film
adaptation of what would it be? Wow? Great question. There
was a children's book I wanted to adapt called Andrew

(01:01:05):
Henry's Meadow that was always something on my list. Um,
I don't know, Donald, do you have anything that's on
your mind that's not Star Wars related that I could
add that I could adapt him to a movie. Wow? Um,
it's all been done before. No, Donald, that's not the
attitude that that's looking for. There's there are a couple

(01:01:25):
of role playing games, okay you that suck at as
role playing games, But the visuals and the artwork and
all of the stuff that they put into the game
is so great that you could easily turn it into
animated series and or movie. Has there been a good

(01:01:48):
Dungeons and Dragons movie. No, there's no such thing as
a good Dungeons and Dragons movie. It's impossible. There's no way.
There's no way. If you did, if you were able
to achieve that and and make it feel like it
very enters starting off, and by the end of it
they're experts and all of that. If you could make
that happen in two and a half hours and it'd

(01:02:08):
be good, you are the best. But like the closest
thing you have to it is Lord of the Rings. Yeah, okay, um, Douglas.
When you play D and D, you play like like
like Dani or sorry, last One or a game of Thrones.
That's the closest thing. Those are the closest things in
Dungeons and Dragons. When you played, you play like these
guys do on a virtual board with friends to tabletop. Yeah, yeah,

(01:02:32):
we're playing of ours. So we actually started at this
beginning of COVID. I think so many people who started
playing at the start of COVID. Uh, there's five of us,
and then obviously our dungeon Master, and then we're all
Philly vaccinate and now so we had like one we
only had for the first time, like a few weeks ago,
we had our first end Parson game ever and we

(01:02:54):
haven't had one. We haven't had one since because we're like,
well neither we've done that. We can't go back to
going online, so we want to, but obviously everyone's schedules
are like it's a little bit more difficult to get
everyone in one room at one time. Does everyone drink
and smoke weed when you play? Yes? Yeah, I was
about to say, if you're not doing that, and that's
and that was that was the allure when you. When

(01:03:14):
I was a kid and I was playing with all
my friends, it was like we would get turnouts where
it'd be like ten people and you'd be like, there's
no way we're gonna do a campaign with all these
people to night. But people would come to smoke weed
and drink too. That was the reason why they were there.
They were playing the game. No, So we would have
like the neighborhood drug dealer come through and play Dungeons
and Dragon so we could smoke weed for freewood, you

(01:03:36):
know what I mean. He was also a buddy of
but he was also friends grow up. Would he weigh
in and be like, don't let your god. He would play.
He would play, and he would roll some of the
biggest blunt you'd ever seen in your life, and we'd
pass it around and play Dungeons and Dragons. Man. But
it would be like, look, man, I'm gonna tell you
something right now. That would be the best when you

(01:03:57):
When you'd be like, oh shit, I don't want to
say his name on here. I don't want to get
him in trouble. You'd be like, oh, I'm saying anyway,
fucking oh shit, coming to night. Oh I'll believe that
every how come, every how come, every drug deal his
name is Why why is that? When I was growing up,
every drug Yeah, I guess so every drug deal I had.

(01:04:19):
When we first started playing at the start of the Pandemic,
We're playing like two or three times a week because
there was nothing else to do. And it got to
a point where I'm like, Okay, I need to not
drink for a while, because it was like every session
was like five or six beers. And then I'd like, right, okay,
I need to like not drink for ay. Got to
be careful because you're you're your character we crushed, right, Yeah,

(01:04:40):
well you're what are You're getting too messed up. You're
not gonna make the right choices for your character. What
level is your character right now? Level ten? Rogue sorcerer. Okay,
so yeah, here's the thing. Here's the thing. I was
about to say, here's the thing, though, what does that mean?
It just means he's he has a very experienced character,
and he's getting some pretty dope rolls out of his

(01:05:01):
attacks right now, Like, yeah, how many dimes do you
roll for an attack? Like five or six now no, yeah, yes, late.
I multi classed, so my roles are like my spells
at the lower So if you multi class, you can
have do different types of characters. So like a dark Elf,
So I'm like, I'm a wood Elf that started as

(01:05:22):
a rogue and then then went into like go became
a sorcerer as well. And so you're really you're a
really high level because you had to get to tenth level. Okay,
I feel like people are gonna start tuning out. So
these are different things, Daniel. Do you respect that character
that sounds like something impressive and you're at I'll pitch

(01:05:44):
this way like leveling and Dudgeons and Dragons is one
to twenty, so ten means you've been playing for a
long time, Like you get to level twenty. It's a
really really think about it because he can't but think
about it, but think about it. Think about it, Danil.
He he has to go up in levels first with
the first class before he can switch to the second class.
So he was already a tenth level. Why can't I

(01:06:06):
just show up at the game. You're like, hey, everybody,
are you doing him? Zach, I'm a level twenty ogre magi,
let's do this. Sometimes you start a campaign like yeah,
campaign starting at a level twenty that you didn't earn it,
saying yeah, I'm just gonna kill everyone. What's the most
amount of dye you can roll? It depends on what

(01:06:27):
you're rolling for. Yeah, yeah, Zach, I implore you listen,
I'm begging you, Zach. I'm not now, I'm begging you. Now,
get a fucking switch and get Zelda Breath of the Wild. You.
If you are looking for procrastination for writing, no, I'm not.
I'm looking to get away from procrastination from riding. Okay,
all right, but thank you. All right, Douglas, it's time
for Toronto Slash, Scotland's favorite segment. It's time too big.

(01:07:01):
Oh my god, god, just every breastfeeding mom is just
pissed right now. Sorry, baby, let's get Okay, I take it, Shure,
it is lat Okay, they're back. If if my wife,

(01:07:21):
if my wife listens to this, she'll be very appreciative
of that. There you go. Now, we get a lot
of comments from breastfeeding moms that they appreciate it when
we help the baby relatch. After Donald screams all right,
go ahead, Gregory, what's here? How can we help you? So?
I had a baby last year on the thirty first
of October. Congrats he came. He came ten weeks early,

(01:07:42):
so he was like a premi baby. He's completely fine,
He's absolutely gorgeous. He was just he was just eager
to meet us, and he just needed to grow grow
a little bit um. However, like since then, I was
never really one for worrying, and since then, uh, like
I'm just like constantly worrying about his like well being

(01:08:04):
and his development and basically anything and everything. And it's
sometimes it's just at the back of my mind, but
sometimes it's like right at the forefront and can be
quite like overwhelming. Yeah, and I was just wondering if
a ever goes away and b if not, is there
anything you would recommend? First of all, welcome you parenthood.

(01:08:29):
This is what parenthood is, Douglas. This is how it is.
This is four ever. Well, we get a little even
a little respite after eighteen years, right even after no,
even after eighteen years, you still kind of worry about them.
I know my mom knows about me, now, I know
my mom worries about me, But I'm saying that, like
his main goal right now is eighteen. But dude, listen,

(01:08:50):
you get to eighteen, you get to eighteen, there's a relief.
There's definitely a really get when you get to the
point where they can freaking think for themselves and everything
and you and you hear yourself coming out of your
child's mouth, you hear your knowledge coming out. Then you
start to relax a little bit too. It's like, all right, well,
they're thinking like me now, and they know that I
wouldn't want to do this, and they're thinking, well, what

(01:09:11):
would daddy and mommy do? So I'm starting to you
know what I mean. So there's that. But I'm gonna
keep in one hundred with you for the rest of
your life. He's saying, till eighteen. I'm telling you, until
you pass away, you're always eighteen years, eighteen years and
worry about eighteenth birthday. He found out it wasn't he
is Hilary Donald. That song is hilarious. Yeah, it's the truth.

(01:09:35):
Though I ain't saying see a gold digger. You see
him on TV any given Sunday when a Super Bowl
shout out yeah, shout yeah, ask them if Donald can
sing the full song for our sponsors. All Right, Douglas,
I don't have any kids, but I can tell you, um,

(01:09:57):
you know, risk management every everything, whether it's getting on
a motorcycle or swimming in the ocean, there's ways of
managing risk. Yeah, you know, so if there's things in
your house, is the child as your child walking it? No,
he's like this close to crawling. He's oh, you're in trouble.
Once that happens too, it gets even worse. Man. Yeah, yeah,
he's like getting super frustrated that he's like he just

(01:10:18):
hasn't figured out that he has the movies hands. And
then as soon as that happens and makes just make
sure your house is all proved, like even the chords,
you know, the Shade chords. Kids can't get hurt themselves
on those. And I mean, obviously I'm not an expert.
Google every possible thing in your house. So it's going
to get those kiddie door fences, right, Donald, you know,
I'm thinking about it. It's a pool, Gregory. You pretty

(01:10:40):
I'm pretty I'm pretty sure Douglas is already. I know
I'm brainstorming for him. Douglas del Pool No, no, no, okay,
but if you ever go over a friend's house. Once
the baby starts crawling and walking and they have a pool,
you can't leave him out of your site for two seconds. Yeah, yeah,
just tech teach the baby how to swim pretty early, obviously. Yeah,
And that's another thing I do if I was if
I was you and feeling like gurotic um, starts swimming

(01:11:01):
like as soon as possible, because they can swim. He
could probably as a boy or girl by he could
probably swim right now. Well, I've show you them just
throwing babies in the water. I'm not them right now. No,
that's I think. I think I'll wait till two. But
that's what you really want, because look, let's say you
do have a pool and the baby does fall in
the pool. It gives you enough time to get to

(01:11:24):
the baby, you know, yeah, where as you know what
I mean, and where instead of the baby sinking to
the bottom, the baby will day up on top and
float for a little bit before it does that. And
you'd be surprised how long babies can swim for. And
I would also say, if you have babysitters and stuff,
I think it would make me neurotic if they were
driving the child around and I didn't know their driving skills.
Get a nanny cam. Yeah, not just for you, for

(01:11:48):
not just for you. You know, I'm being, I'm fucking being.
I'm bullshitting. You don't need a nanny camera. You do,
you have a nanny No, But when Winnie starts having babysitters,
there's no reason not to have a camera up in
you on your shelf, except just don't get caught. Just
don't get caught sayings tough to your over the baby monitor.

(01:12:09):
That's like, isn't that a story that happens where like
someone goes into the to the baby's room the nursery
and they're just talking shit about their mother in law
and then the baby monitors on in the kitchen. Oh yeah,
I think I happened in every sitcom. Yeah, and then
they go into and they go into the kitchen and
the mother in law's like packed, she's like out of
that welcome. Yeah, you're welcome, to be honest, you're welcome. No. No,

(01:12:33):
that's great. Douglas. How awesome is it to have the
name Douglas Walker. That's a pretty fucking dope name. It's
Douglas Walker. I love it. It's good. Uh, do you
want to sing a little something for for us, anything,
just to give us a little sample or no, No,
I'm all right, I'm all right. I'll go stars in

(01:12:55):
their multitude, I think my friends. I mean, he may
have gone the beach, but hold honestly, a little dream
star shining bright above you night wings that seem to whisper.
I love you birds singing in the sycamore tree, dream

(01:13:15):
a little dream of me. All right, everybody, that's our show.
Thank you so much, Douglas for coming on, and um Donald,
I love you, Daniel, I love you Joel. I love
your dream love dream. If I may yeah, no you

(01:13:39):
may not, Douglas, No, alright you may not. Donald ahead,
I just want to say, like, it's just a quick
thanks to you guys. And also probably by extension Bill
Lawrence for because I've never heard of him, who's that
obviously obviously a big fan of Scrubs grown up and
like set the standard for like platonic male friendship, like

(01:14:00):
between two guys. Like the relationship on that show was like,
that's the kind of people I want to surround myself with,
and that's the people that I do surround myself with.
Now that's good, Thank you so much and as it is,
or it kind of a quick shout out. It's just
just just for my wife really because over COVID. Since

(01:14:22):
COVID and she's had the baby, herner band have still
managed to like write and record an album. And so
I thought, as like a she's awesome, and I just
want to I just want to like shout out who
they are. So, what's the name of the album. What's
the name of an album? Where can we get it?
What's the name of the band? Okay, So the band
is called Linar Bloom. They are a three women harmony

(01:14:43):
folk band and they've just they just finished record of
their album Running Deep. It's still getting mixed and mastered.
But you can get their EP which is on anywhere
you can get music. It's just under their name Lenar
Bloom at two quote scrubs itself. If my heart could
write songs, they'd sound like this. Oh you're a very

(01:15:06):
nice husband. You seem like a very nice man. Thanks,
thank you. You seem kind and loving and I bet
you're gonna be an amazing father. He is an amazing father. Well,
I'm saying as the child continues to grow. Okay, Donald Okay,
calm down, Donald where this room, This room, I'm not exaggerating,

(01:15:28):
is one hundred and ten degrees. But look at my armpit,
all right, nobody want to see that. The time has come.
Holy cow, drumroll please Daniel, Daniel, I'm gonna I don't
have timpany. Daniel's the one with Timpa. Wait a second,
at you. There we go, Daniel and dogs getting bigger
by the way. That dog is very cute. But don't

(01:15:48):
let the dog upstage from the TIMPANYMP. No, listen, this
is incredible. Yeah, this is this is what's happened. This
is a sum up. And he said, can we give
one of our listeners who's in need of a car
that a car that would really change their life? Not
someone who just wants a car upgrade to a Hunday Tucson,

(01:16:09):
but someone who could really have meaningful change in their
life from receiving a car. I didn't even think they
were going to spring for the fancy Hunday Tusson. I
thought it might be like the entry vehicle or whatever,
the lowest one they have. I'm driving right now. Yes,
but it's still nice. Yeah, but the Cone is still
a great car. It is it's electric. But these folks

(01:16:30):
came and said absolutely will um and we'd like to
give them a hunday. Tucson and Donald and I were like, whoa, whoa,
whoa what. Then I went to iHeart. I want to
take credit for this, but I really feel like, I mean,
I don't even know how it. No, No, I don't mean,
I don't mean separate from you. I want to say that.

(01:16:51):
I went to the good people at iHeart and said, hey,
I I don't want someone to get Sometimes when someone
wins a luxury car, like on a game show or something,
they're then stuck with some insane tax bill. And they said,
I don't want to strap someone who's clearly in need
with a surprise tax bill for a yea, you want
a luxury car. And this was you know, this was

(01:17:15):
all you that did that. This is the truth. I
did do that. But I want everyone, all the listeners
to know, because some of you were like, oh, you're
gonna stick this kind person in need with the tax bill. No,
we're paying the taxes. We pay taxes. Um. So I
could get real controversial right now, but I'm not gonna

(01:17:36):
do it. Please don't. This is a celebration. Dan'll get
the tympany ready again, who hover your finger over the
tympany all tax paid? Now, I want to read before
we bring on the winner. I would like to read
um people that were with some amazing submissions, and I

(01:17:56):
want you to know that every single one of them
was read by our team and a narrowed down And
I have to say that there was a slight soft
spot in her heart for this particular writer because she
is a nurse's assistant, and the people submitting paragraphs were

(01:18:17):
limited to one hundred words, and I'm not sure if
she used all hundred words. Joel, did you do a
word count on the winner? I didn't do a word count.
Let's do a word count. I want to know how
she won with eighty seven words whatever it is. But
I'm going to read you what she wrote. Okay, everybody
count well he reads, let's go. No, No, Jowell knows

(01:18:42):
how to do a word count. She's a right way.
I want the answer. What is it? Ninety nine? Whoa
fond nurse? Applause? Daniel fonderous applause, and she kept it
in the yes. Wow. We also love a rule of following. Okay,
I'm gonna read you. I'm gonna read you what the
winner wrote to us before we bring her on quote.

(01:19:04):
This would be a dream come true to win this car.
Right now, I put the kids on the bus for school,
and then I walk three miles to catch a bus
to go to work as a nurse's assistant. As a
single mom with one income coming in, getting a car
is not in the budget, as I can barely pay
the bills. Winning this car will relieve so much stress,

(01:19:27):
especially coming into the winter season. The head being able
to drive means I could work more hours and possibly
look for a better job for my family that you
had us at. All of that, all ninety nine words. Um,
So we are on behalf of Donald, Fazon, Duell, Monique, DJ,

(01:19:50):
Daniel Goodman. Aren't you happy? I know your last name.
I'm honored you, honor me. I don't know my thing
plugged inn and uh and of course Unda the good
people at Hunday and the good people at I Heeart.
So we are very thrilled to welcome our winner and
Doyle Donald. Please do a celebratory ladies and gentlemen tonight

(01:20:11):
on a very special episode of Fix Your Life. We
welcome and I don't know how to do anything I
ever said, my son help me. Oh it's so nice
to meet you. And congratulations you won. Thank you so much.
We really appreciate the kids having going crazy here in

(01:20:33):
the house. I'm actually hiding it in their bedroom where
they that's very sweet. Well, not only did you win,
but you wont like when we've set out to do
this contest. For some of you thought, okay, well, understandably,
Hunday will probably give the base model they gave you,
like the sweet Hunday Tucson. It's not. It's incredible. Really,

(01:20:54):
we can I was trying earlier. Oh good, tell us
a little bit. We read your note. We just read
your note, which we thought was beautifully said. And of
course it goes without saying on this show we have
a soft spot in our hearts for single moms and
of course people in the medical profession. But tell us
a little bit about, please, just how how this car
is going to change life for you a bit. Oh

(01:21:16):
my gosh. You know, in the morning, I have to
rush to get the kids on the bus, and then
I have to actually I started running to the bus stop,
which is like miles away, so that I can get
like a couple of extra hours in but I had
to take the bus all the way to work and
then so it limits the time I can actually do
work because I have to make sure I'm back here
and not having the kids on the street here before

(01:21:37):
I get home from work. So the cars like maybe
a different job or something like that, and they'll give
me more full time work because now I don't get
benefits or anything like that. And the kids are never
able to do sports at school or after school or
like play dates because how are they going to get there?

(01:21:58):
And it'll be able to We'll be able to do
so much, you know, working as you say in like
the medical professional. Well I'm not only an aid, but um,
you know, we had so many sad cases over the year.
You know, some patients died there with the COVID and
all that business. So like, you know, this will be
so exciting. At least we'll be able to drive to work,

(01:22:20):
you know, listening to the radio. That'll be so nice.
Oh no, then the car it doesn't come with a radio,
yes it does. No, no, no, no, it all it
has is the motor. There's no air conditioning. There's no
air conditioning, and there's no there's no computer, so you
have to roll the windows down. Stone And I don't

(01:22:45):
know if you saw the little funny video we made
driving around on the Tucson when we did that show,
but it's that exact car that we had that we
were driving. It really isn't really nice. It has that
whole clear roof thing and your your kids are gonna
love it because it's super cool and um, we're just
so happy for you and the idea of you being

(01:23:07):
able to take your kids to activities and not be
walking three miles to catch a bus after you take
them to the bus stop. I just especially in winter.
I just Donald, what city are you? It's work and
work Wayland. We're in Whyland, so it's like far. We're
in the middle of nowhere very much, but there. What's

(01:23:27):
the next closive city, next clos city, what's like a
big one in Massachusetts. We're in Massa. Wow, this is
definitely gonna work because I know how cold it gets
in listening area. We've given people. The most we've ever
given people is is a is a case of kombucha

(01:23:48):
and um and that always goes over very well. And
no offense that gts kombucha but a hounday Tucson is
is one step more baller. It's so beautiful, so beautiful.
We were rushing a video on it. I can't believe it.
That's nice. Wait, hold up, you were watching a video

(01:24:08):
on the Honda tu Son. Yeah, and its features on
the phone. My son showed me how to do it
on the phone on its features. I love. Yeah. Do
you remember that? Do you remember when you had Like
I remember when I was younger, and it was like
the car. If there was a car that I really wanted,
I would go to the at least go to the
dealership and get the hand brochure. Yeah, the brochure and

(01:24:28):
look through the brochure. And I would happen to me
when my father would go to look at a new car,
I would get all the brochures in the whole dealership
and I would because he barely cared, but I loved cars,
and I would sit there at home and look at
what paint color I might get and what features I
would get if I get If I get the S series,

(01:24:49):
I'm gonna go candy Bullet right now. But if I
have to get the Sea my father never cared, but
I was like, we definitely need it behind the um
We needed behind the front seat monitors. You know, the
kids are saying, Oh, can we have ten seats or
seven seats? I'm like, I only need three seats. Yeah,

(01:25:12):
well yeah it comes with that for sure. Well. It
actually has some really cool safety features that we found
out we were driving. It has this remember that thing
Donald about. What I love about it actually was when
you turn the signal on your let's say you turn
your right signal on, a camera that shows your blind
spot comes up in the right in front of you,
right in front of the steering where like where your

(01:25:32):
speedometer is, a camera showing if any car is in
your blind spot comes up on your dashboard. Pretty cool.
I wish my car. I have a nice car and
it doesn't have that. I wish my car had that. Anyway,
we don't want to take more of your time. We
just wanted to celebrate you. Will you please when you
get it and it's in your possession, will you please
send us some pictures of you and the kids so

(01:25:54):
that we can we can put them online and just
show everyone you and the kids and a new car.
Oh that would be that would be great. Yeah, no,
no problem. The kids will love that. Okay, Donald, Well,
I'm excited for you and I know I I you know,
my my grand father lives in Springfield, Massachusetts, so I

(01:26:18):
know how cold it gets, and I know how suv
is definitely needed in the winter, and so, uh so
I'm just so happy that Hunde was so willing to
give us a car first off, but then that we
were able to get you a car. Yeah, you know
what I mean. And and we noticed, by the way, Anne,
that you hit ninety nine words. We did a word

(01:26:40):
count because that's how particular we are in our contest.
And if you had done one on one, oh no,
they wouldn't. They doesn't. I don't think one on one
would even get through to us. But and you only
ended up with ninety nine. And I wonder if there's
one word you'd like, maybe just thanks? Yeah, thankful. Well, um, listen,

(01:27:05):
we are grateful to you working in the health industry,
and uh we all, every single one of us appreciates
how hard it is to be a single mother. It
sounds to me like you're a really fun single mother
and your kids are about to have a really really
cool SUV thanks to Hundai. So congratulations and thank you.
So much, and send us pictures, send us pictures of

(01:27:27):
that beautiful hounday two song. Oh my gosh, definitely all
right an take care of all right. Wow, I can't
believe we gave away a car. Well, we did it.
She's very sweet, Joel. Make sure we get pictures because
I think it would be fun to put out on
the on the interwebs and show people and and her
kids and their new tu song. Shout out to Hande

(01:27:47):
Man like, yeah, real, for real, for real man, you
guys are awesome for this, and thank you for partnering
with us over here, fake doctors, real friends. Uh, you know,
don't you feel good now? I feel great, like I
I did something. I got emotional when she was like,
my kids can't do playdates or sports or anything. Well,
when she said the sports thing, that really hit home.
Because you always always been like I can't take them

(01:28:11):
to see Star Wars. I would have been like, let's
see if we can get you a flat screen inside.
I'm gonna spring for a flat screen. No. Um, all right, Well,
I'm so happy man that we did that. That was
really cool man, really nice. Thanks thanks everybody, Thanks Jowell
and Daniel for making it happen and thanks, iHeart and

(01:28:32):
thanks hunday and all right, you know what I think, man,
we should try and figure a way to do things
like this more often when we partner with you know
where we partner with big companies, whether it be car
or like GTS, they're so awesome for doing what they do. Also,
we got to shout them out. Also, we could give
away some free therapy from Better Help. Maybe. Oh, okay,

(01:28:57):
the whole world. That's yo's brainstorming. That's kind that's actually
kind of fire, dude, if we could get that going,
y'all see Amanda dance, Oh, she has a really good
She has a good shout at winning this thing. Biggest
competition is probably what Jojo. I think Jojo Christine Chu

(01:29:18):
is definitely competition. And I'll tell you why. One she's
been going to the show for season after season after season,
Like she's sat in the audience and watched that doesn't matter,
and she's dreamed of this. First of all, it's about voting,
all right now. Jojo Seawall has got like a zillion followers,

(01:29:40):
great story. And I think Amanda, I know him biased,
but I think Amanda is the best dancer. Yeah, I agree,
But I don't know that Amanda has enough voters because
it's all about popularity ultimately, Well, everybody can only vote
ten times. Were you sad when your karate kid of

(01:30:01):
a guy got kicked off? I kind of saw it coming. Yeah,
he couldn't He couldn't really dance. I'm sure he could dance. No,
I don't think he could dance. I'm just a little
bit older than that five. There's plenty of seventy five
year olds who can shake a leg. I don't think
that that particular gentleman could dance. Bet you. I bet

(01:30:21):
you when he was younger and he was limburn doing
his karate back then, he was never seen these old
men on the dance floor that know all the moves
and they're twisting and they're spinning. And a lot of
those cats danced as a young as youngster. They had
to lull young people had to learn ballroom dancing back
in the day. Do you know how Joejoe Swa is
the first woman to be able to dance with a

(01:30:43):
female dancer. I was thinking we approached the show about
you and I dancing together, Um, yes, please, why not?
Why are you shaking your head because we're gonna get
kicked off right away. No, neither one of us knows
how to be you're a very good dancer, neither one
of us. As a practice, we ball room dance. We'll
break dance, but the little lamar, we'll pop in lock.

(01:31:10):
They'll be like, no matter what they say. And now
Donald face on and Zach Braff with the fox trot,
We'll still going on and pop do yes. And you
know everyone changes their song every week. LA this week
Zach and Donald with the tango, poping lock. Clap your hands, everybody.

(01:31:38):
I bet you we wouldn't get kicked off for a
long ass time. Can you ask the Dancing the Stars
producers if they'll make an acceptance? We get kicked off
so fast. They're not taking this seriously. Yeah, people are

(01:31:59):
very very serious about this. Yeah, I just serious. Understand
how popular this show is. This is not dance. Is
a serious, serious ballroom dance. Did you see the movies
The Silver Lining, The Civil Line Playbook? Yeah? Do you
remember what that movie was? Yeah? They build up, they
build up to a ballroom dancing competition. I recall, yeah, yeah,

(01:32:22):
why are you laughing? Did something happen on Ani? Do
you remember how serious people remember? But do you remember
how serious? Do you remember? How serious? Wait? You listen
to watching Star Wars right now? Yeah? What's that? She? Sometimes?
Joel laughs and I'm like, is it the show or
did something happen on Rebels in the back room. I

(01:32:43):
just like Donald's passion for sivil lines Playbook. He's like
it was all spelled out right there in that movie.
If you see serious stuff, it's a serious stuff. If
you see how those people hit, they were so pissed
off watching the two of them at the end of
the movie dance. They were so upset all of the
people that were there. There's like, all we gotta do
is get like a five. Amon's first movie, Strictly Ballroom.

(01:33:05):
I never saw that, so goddamn good you like it
the documentary? No? Oh no, I'm thinking of Mad Hot
ball Room first movie. I have not seen Strictly ball Room,
but I have seen Mad Hot ball Room. Is that
the one with the kids? Yeah? Sounds so great. Anyway,
vote for a Manda, guys, come on, we want her
to win. We don't. We don't have she doesn't have

(01:33:26):
the fan base that Joe Joe Siwa has and uh
we want we want her to win, so vote for her, right? Yeah? Absolutely? Donald?
Did you vote ten times for her? You want me
to be honest, Yes, I want you to be honest.
I voted once. But that's white. You can just copy
paste ten times in a text. Is that what you did? Yeah,

(01:33:48):
you say, Amanda to the whatever number they give you
on the show, and then you copy that text and
you just go paste, paste, paste, paste ten times. You
can't do that for Mandy. It'll take you eleven seconds.
I'll do it next Monday, Dick, I thought you can
say something funnier that you voted for Cody. Cody got
screwed because of that man. Damn Cheryl. You had to

(01:34:10):
get that bad man. But he still looked good on
his rehearsal video. Dang, I wanted to see Cody dance.
I'm not gonna lie. Do you know why I wanted
to see Cody dance? Because you have a crush on him.
There's a little bit of there's a little bit of
a man crush on Cody. I'm not gonna line. Yeah.

(01:34:30):
When when when Amanda took that picture and sent it
to us of the two of them, there was a
little bit of jealous jealousy in me. Now, I'm not
gonna lie. I just want to hang out with the dude.
And it's really funny. He's so this is the way
we're gonna get him on our show. It's because a
man Amanda is gonna get his cell phone number and

(01:34:51):
we're gonna stalk him. We're gonna have to. Yeah. Oh
this is our this is our goodbye call. Guys. Yeah, yeah, right,
you tell you something. Yeah, we're going your fault. You
guys want to tell me to break a leg? It
would be nice. Well I have a leg, man, do
you want it? You want it right now? You want

(01:35:12):
what is happening? I'm pretending that Donald. Pretend Donald. I'm
pretending this is Donald. The mic is Donald's penis. Okay,
I'm okay, okay, that's enough. That's enough. That's getting hard,
aren't you. It's a little movement. I didn't lick it.
I just put my nose on it. I'm so happy
you didn't lick it. All right, um, all right, smell

(01:35:37):
smell it smell like sports know. All right, We love
you guys, Thanks for tuning in. We'll see you next time.
About we made a nurs so gada around you here,

(01:36:03):
I'm gada around you here, I'm expect for you while
you're with a time mm hmmmm

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Donald Faison

Zach Braff

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