August 14, 2023 • 41 mins
RHONJ - S11, E1 “C U Next Tuesday”
Catt Sadler comes in hot with an opinion on Dolores’ plastic surgery. Find out how this episode of RHONJ made her feel better about her own life.
Bethenny reveals what part of her childhood made it possible for her to survive in the Real Housewives.
Plus, which franchise did Bravo call Catt for?!
Listen to Catt's Podcast, “Catt Sadler Now” wherever you listen to podcasts.
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:04):
See you next Tuesday. In Jersey.
Speaker 2 (00:06):
It's the season eleven premiere, and there is never a
dull moment. Dolores and David fight over her plastic surgery.
Teresa goes around Evan's birthday party talking about him, and
Jackie makes a comment about Gia that has Teresa fired up.
Entertainment reporter and host of the podcast It Sure is
a Beautiful Day, Kat Sadler joins me to break down
the episode. This is real Housewives of New Jersey, Season eleven,
(00:29):
episode one, See You next Tuesday. Let's get into it.
So are you a Housewives fan? Do you have you
watched for years?
Speaker 1 (00:44):
Do you have a specific favorite city?
Speaker 3 (00:47):
Okay, so, Bethany, you know, when I was on E
covering this stuff every day, I was responsible for kind
of watching everything, right, you have to be a bit
of an expert on everything. And so as much as
like I have had the pleasure of interviewing you before
and Housewives from every franchise, I have never been an avid,
(01:07):
like die hard plot line savvy viewer. So it's like
I know a little bit about everything, but you know,
I had to watch the Kardashians. I had to watch
you know, I had to watch the Emmy nominated scripted shows.
Speaker 2 (01:20):
So it's kind of like, I know enough, but I
knowly fluent, but I get by.
Speaker 3 (01:25):
I am not fluent at at all, really, but it
was so fun watching this episode because I'm like, why
am I not watching more? Because my life is so
boring these days and I watch I'm usually like into
the super like dramatic successions of the world and you know,
like I like like really dark scripted stuff dramas. So
I was watching this and I had the best time.
(01:47):
I was like, oh, this is this is my new
my new thing.
Speaker 1 (01:49):
It was.
Speaker 3 (01:50):
It was fantastic. It was fun.
Speaker 2 (01:51):
This is Jersey and I'm not fluent either. I speak
the language better than you, and I have institutional knowledge
because I've been inside show, but some of these episodes,
I have never seen this episode either.
Speaker 1 (02:03):
I don't know who everybody is either.
Speaker 2 (02:06):
I mean I have heard their names and seeing their faces,
but I don't know the characters that well either.
Speaker 3 (02:10):
So well, let me just tell you one fun fact
before we get into this. Only because you know, as
far as my knowledge goes, I had the crazy assignment
this had to be you might know more than me.
But when Teresa got out of prison. When would that
have been, Like.
Speaker 1 (02:26):
I have the one the literally maybe five years ago,
maybe longer.
Speaker 3 (02:31):
I feel like this was maybe ten years ago. But
as someone who didn't know the franchise that well, somehow
I got the first post jail house interview with Teresa
and this was in New York City and it was
in a hotel room and it was three hours of exclusive.
You had the exclusive, and I was the reporter on this.
(02:52):
So that's that's what I remember. Gosh, that was almost
eight years eight years ago. Yeah, and I got to
sit down with her and like hear her talk about
her prison experience or whatever. So that was like the biggest,
most in depth like moment. And so it was wild
to like watch her in this episode and just see
how much has changed him where she is and I
had no idea, so I kind of got caught up
(03:13):
on all that.
Speaker 2 (03:14):
And now right now, I'm sure you know she's married
and it's controversial too, and it's just a crazy environment.
But Delores and Frank, I don't know what season she started,
but I think Frank is her ex husband and she
shares a son with him, so you saw that she
has a son. I think he's like, you know, he
looks like a hot kid, but I think people think
he's like a really hot son and and he It's
(03:38):
what was interesting to me was that he was friend.
He seems like he's very close with her current boyfriend
who's a doctor.
Speaker 3 (03:44):
Yes, yeah, did you see that in the kitchen. I
did see that in the kitchen. I was trying to
piece together, like, Okay, what are all the moving parts here?
And yeah he By the way, my son is off
to college next week, so I like I get the whole, like,
oh my god, grown man but still a child. And
he was studying for his what trying to get into
business score or something. Anyway, Yeah, that's an interesting dynamic.
(04:09):
She's like living with her ex right like on occasion.
Speaker 1 (04:12):
No, I don't know.
Speaker 2 (04:13):
She seems always like it seems like her ACX is
always her date and her plus one. And this audience,
this Bravo audience, myself including likes this guy Frank. He's
a good fun character and he's you know, he's like
this like cute sweet meathead that is just always around her.
And I don't know if he really is in love
with her. They're best friends, they've worked together. I think
I think they've done houses together, but he seems like
(04:36):
a good guy and it just didn't work from a
relationship standpoint. I think he might have cheated on her
when they were together or something. But it's weird to
watch when you know that she has broken up with
this other guy. I don't know when or who she's
with now, but I think it's in like my periphery
that she's not with this guy, and this is sort
of like they're setting up with the fact that they're
(04:56):
going to break up. So I'm of course thinking about
what's going to happen with the son and this guy's relationship.
But when a son is older, when a child is older,
they're an adult and they have their own phone number
and text and emails so they can have whatever relationships
they want.
Speaker 1 (05:11):
He's an adult.
Speaker 3 (05:12):
Yeah, completely, completely. I don't know enough about the backstory,
but but it's hard to keep up. It's hard to
keep up. Do you know that? That's exactly what I mean.
I'm sorry, I'm not bringing it back to myself again,
but this is exactly this is exactly what's going on
in my life at the moment. I moved to Malibu
because of my new partner. I've been dating for two
(05:33):
years and I have two sons and they're eighteen and
twenty two. And it's so interesting because they have such
a great relationship with their own dad that it takes
the pressure off because to your point, it's like they
can be as close to Greg as they want to be.
They can like connect with them, they can golf with them,
they can you know, gro out with him if they
want to, but they don't have to. They're old, they're older,
(05:57):
you know what I mean. Like, so it's kind of
like letting it or gan evolve to the level that
they want to and they can come here as much
as they want, and they don't have to be here
if they don't want to be. It's kind of nice.
It's kind of freeing when your kids do get older
in that sense that when you are choosing a partner,
as so many middle aged women are, you know, maybe
the second time around, or third time around, or who
(06:17):
knows what, but you can actually choose for yourself. And
obviously you want your kids and your family to adore
your partner, but if they don't, it's not the end
of the world. It's not a deal breaker.
Speaker 2 (06:27):
Well, first of all, yes, do apply it to yourself.
Don't say I don't want to make I want you
to apply it to yourself, because that's literally what the
show is about. It's funny that I just walk into
something and you happen to be experiencing it, which I
do like this show as a vehicle for that. But yeah,
and I find when kids are little kids, you're kind
of just like sticking them in a car seat and
they're doing what you want them to do, and if
(06:48):
they don't like someone that you're with, they'll make a comment,
or if someone doesn't like you, it makes you feel
really bad and it's something you have to deal with
and you think it's going to last forever. For those
of you listening that are in blended families or blended
relationship or step kids that hate you or whatever, things
like that are really just a moment in time, and
even more so where if there's blending, even teens, tweens,
(07:11):
high school, college, there are so few moments that everybody
has to be all together at the same time. Like
that's what holidays before, That's why holidays are stressful. But
in my well, I have a blended situation. We all
have a great relationship. But it's not that often that
everyone is actually together, because there's time that my daughter's
with a father and I'm with my daughter and I'm
(07:31):
with my fiance and he is this kid likes. It's
hard to corral an entire stable, you know of animals,
so so to your point, especially when they're older, everybody
kind of can have the relationship they want to have.
And yes, the pressure is off. People are adults. They
can say what's on their mind. And a child adult
can say, I think that's disrespectful what you just said
(07:51):
to me, and an adult adult can say you're spoiled
and you know whatever.
Speaker 1 (07:56):
Like kind of people have voices, Yes.
Speaker 3 (07:59):
They do, and it is hard to corral everybody, and
sometimes it's good kind of to not. I mean, life
is so busy and everybody's got their own agendas and
their responsibilities and all of that. I mean, Greg I
just inherited four kids. Greg has four kids, so I
have never dated anyone after having my own children who
(08:19):
was a father, and so this is much less.
Speaker 1 (08:21):
Four four No, that's a lot, right, it's a lot.
Speaker 3 (08:25):
And there of course with their mothers week on, week off,
week one week off, so it's not all the time.
And I think kind of like what you're saying, it's
nice that way in a sesse. It's like they come,
they go. It's not one hundred percent of the time.
Everybody can come up for air. Everybody has their own
little spaces and places in this world that make them
(08:47):
feel good, and it's the pressure's off because of that.
Speaker 2 (08:49):
I think for sure, Well, it's the good thing that
no one says aloud, Like in twenty twenty three, it's okay,
you might not the relationship might not work for you.
If you had to live with six children in your house,
you might not be that. But I couldn't do it.
So I could fall in love with someone who had
four kids. But if I and that's what happens in
the beginning of relationships. That's why people have to really
talk about this stuff more when they're dating and be
honest about it, or listen to people like us who
(09:11):
have experienced it. If you thought you had to eat
the whole entire chicken at once, you might throw up.
Speaker 1 (09:17):
You couldn't handle it.
Speaker 2 (09:18):
Like if I thought I had to have that whole
blended family, the idea of it, it would overwhelm me.
But in real life, like, everything's a living breeding organism,
and it there's no such thing as really traditional now
unless you're twenty four and you both come up together
and the parents are best friends and everyone travels together
and it's like an Italian family from the sixties.
Speaker 3 (09:37):
Yeah, And just to add one more layer, I mean here,
I am about to be literally Bethanny. In five days.
I dropped my son off at college, my baby, and
I'm like, I was about to be an empty nester.
And some you know, my friends are like, cool, wait
a minute. You were literally about your whole world could
open up. You could do anything, go anywhere, have any job,
(09:57):
take on any project. The freedom was literally right here
in front of my face. And of course I fall
in love with someone with four young kids, and that
wasn't consideration. It was just like Kat, They're like, are
you sure you want to sign up for that? You know,
and they're lovely and they're such great children, and I
keep saying that. They're like yeah, but still it's four kids.
Speaker 1 (10:14):
No, no, no, it's exactly so.
Speaker 3 (10:16):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (10:17):
People do distance, people do divorce, people do widow people
do everything. So I agree, And that's interesting. That's funny
that that kitchen conversation brought this whole thing up. So
the next topic that was interesting to me about Dolores was,
you know, new ass new DIDs, and she didn't tell
her life partner. Now that is really interesting.
Speaker 3 (10:39):
How does that even happen?
Speaker 1 (10:41):
I don't actually know.
Speaker 2 (10:44):
Maybe he was on a business trip where she said
she was at a spot. I don't that's a great point.
I don't know if we saw that, but I didn't
see it wasn't in this episode. Obviously she doesn't have
to ask him, and she knows he's very against elective surgery.
But I think you just have to tell your partner
about something we were going under, and I just it's
a I can't imagine being in that dynamic. I mean,
(11:05):
I wouldn't have to ask Paul's permission to do anything,
but right he would feel hurt if I didn't include him.
So that's a cautionary tale about their relationship. I think,
I think it's nice to have the endorsement. Like you said,
you don't need permission from anybody else, especially your partner,
I don't think, but but but a little support, a
little endorsement. I could not imagine keeping something of that
(11:27):
gravity from someone that yeah, is, but also what about
the compassion and the bedside man or there are times
that my Fance does jiu jitsu and like, you know,
he's he's in his forties and he's strong and he's
good at it, but sometimes he goes too hard and
that he hurts himself. He doesn't want to admit it
because he feels like an idiot that he hurt himself.
But I'm still there, like, are you okay? Whether I
(11:47):
thought he should have been doing it right after he
was injured before or something, It's still like you want
the bedside manner of someone if you've gone through surgery.
Speaker 1 (11:55):
So I thought that whole thing.
Speaker 2 (11:57):
It's wild, like the show is showing that that relationship
is not.
Speaker 3 (12:00):
Going to work. Yeah, I don't. I don't know how
that's that's that's again possible to a not tell them
and be for them to be anywhere within the vicinity
to be supportive or judge whatever that that is. You'd
think that'd be a little more intimate dynamic. You do know,
I just got a facelift. Do you know this? Oh? No, yes,
this is crazy? Yes me. So that's when I was
(12:23):
watching the episode, I was like.
Speaker 1 (12:25):
Oh, this hell thing is about you.
Speaker 2 (12:26):
I mean, I know, I love my producers and they're
always great a pairing guests. There's no way that they
paired you because of all this, that then they would
be savants and genius.
Speaker 1 (12:36):
Like your episode. Okay, so go ahead. That's funny.
Speaker 3 (12:39):
It's crazy because I this is my first surgery ever,
so I I mean, yeah, it is. Technically it is
my first and certainly my first cosmetic surgery. And I
had a facelift, I had a necklift, and I had
a buffer of PLASTI with my eyes. And I've been
talking about what is the bluff it's like removing the
skin from the hooded hoodedness. Yes, And just how long
(13:03):
ago the surgery was in May? So I'm all, I'm
about two months and some change since I had so new,
it's very new. It's been kind of all I've been
talking about and healing from still healing, like even my
ears are a little numb and look amazing.
Speaker 2 (13:22):
I mean, I can't I need to see like now,
I need to see what you looked like before again,
But you look amazing, always are beautiful.
Speaker 3 (13:28):
But I'm so happy with the results and nice, I'm so,
so so happy and I've been talking about this because
so much of kind of what I am speaking about
with my own audiences these days is about you know,
being a middle aged woman and what's available to us
and how to feel good in our bodies, like all
of it, the vain, you know, cosmetic side, internal subject,
the whole thing. Oh God, bless, oh God, bless. A
(13:50):
great doctor, great doctor. But it was funny because for
me and my little bubble in my little world, even
though I've you know, been in Hollywood for ages, it
was a big deal for me to do that. I mean,
it's a very big decision. And that I watched this episode,
I was like, oh, I don't feel so bad. Everybody's
been under the knife and she's had her butt done,
her this done or it's done.
Speaker 1 (14:10):
You know, did you feel.
Speaker 2 (14:11):
Weird in a fairly new relationship to say to him?
Did you feel self conscious and like weird and old
like that? You're but he has four kids, so he's
not a spring chicken at for kids.
Speaker 3 (14:22):
He is older, he's four years older. He's fifty, you know,
five years older. And but it was back to this
plot line, like I there is no way literally not
as an out of possibility that I would be in
a relationship and this wouldn't be a consideration for both
of us to have that discussion.
Speaker 1 (14:40):
I mean, of course that's what you're that's the point.
Speaker 3 (14:43):
Yeah. I was like, of course I did. I was like,
what do you think? And and his big thing was,
I just want you to still look like you, Like,
I don't want to end up with a new girlfriend
that comes home from the doctor. And it's like, I
have a brand new person in my life. So, you know,
he expressed his concerns. I comfort him seventeen different ways
that I knew how to say. That's also what I want.
So we talked about eight length and yes he is
(15:06):
happy and he comments often, and you know, I'm like, cee, cee, like,
you know good.
Speaker 1 (15:11):
I mean, it's so nice.
Speaker 2 (15:12):
Yeah, that's so funny that this is the episode. And
the woman Margaret who's on the show, I don't know
if she's talked about plastic surgery, and certainly on that
one to quote unquote out, but everybody on the show
seems pretty open about the woman Dolores that had the
butt stuff. She's one of the only people that she's
one of the only housewives who admit that they're on
(15:34):
ozempic or munjaro or one of those, or semi glue
tie whatever, and there has been a sweeping, dramatic housewife
weight loss, and everyone's just acting like in their fifties
and menopause, they just started losing weight. And it's really
stupid and hilarious at the same time. It's funny, but
like I think that they've just it's become more common,
so now they probably would have admitted it, but they're
(15:55):
stuck in the lie because they are ready lied about it.
But I'm not saying that's Margaret. I don't even know
if she's on ozempi. I don't know what she looked
like before, but she looks very fresh. Like I feel
like I've seen her a lot in the press and
other things. She looks her face looks very very she's
a fresh look.
Speaker 1 (16:10):
I think.
Speaker 3 (16:11):
Well, and it's going on so much more. I mean,
you know, like, you know, I don't know if people
are everybody's getting a facelift these days, but you know,
I love it. And you look at someone and you're like,
they look so refreshed to your point, and people are like,
oh my god, you know she had such and such
makeup artists do her makeup, and it's like, I don't
think that's like a really well done eyeliner. I think
(16:32):
that's a lot about the filter.
Speaker 1 (16:34):
How would you know?
Speaker 2 (16:35):
I mean, you could just do a filter and then
you have a facelift every day you never left your house.
You could just do everything in a filter and it
would be you don't have to do the surgery.
Speaker 3 (16:44):
I know you really, you really literally would not have
you know, let's talk.
Speaker 2 (16:59):
About this jen Aden scenario. She's got I think she's Turkish,
she's got this. She's got her mother, her old fashioned
mother who her and her father and siblings are kind
of talking about. And the father's moved in and they're
all trashing this mom. But I'm just thinking about on TV, like,
you know, talking about the mom and having the dad
(17:20):
move in.
Speaker 1 (17:20):
It just seemed like a little cringey.
Speaker 3 (17:24):
I know, I found myself thinking, well, dear God, I
hope they're not watching.
Speaker 1 (17:28):
Right, like, yeah, like, what's the upside of this?
Speaker 2 (17:31):
Well?
Speaker 3 (17:31):
I feel I feel like she tried to make it
like put a button on it by saying, no matter what,
all of my mother or in every relationship with all
of our mothers is strained. But yeah, it wasn't necessarily
a good look. I mean, I don't know, because you
would know you're of the reality ilk, but like how
much of that is talking about in advance or or
(17:53):
sometimes if there's nothing nothing going on? Is that just like.
Speaker 1 (17:56):
Almost like.
Speaker 2 (17:58):
A character needs to have something going on and a story,
and so Britans just sit down and ask what's going
on in your life? And they might see what's going
on in the house and the father's living there, and
then she says, my father's living here, and then they're
probably like, well, we have to go into that because
your father's living here.
Speaker 3 (18:12):
But they it's not a little like that to me,
Like it wasn't like a lot, but it was almost
like making it something. I don't know.
Speaker 2 (18:19):
Yes, I agree, it's funny because jen Aiden's husband is
a doctor. I think he's a plastic surgeon. It's funny
he parties with those other guys a lot, and it
just it seems like they're always giving him shots and
he's always hung over, and it just seems like he's
adhering to peer pressure on a reality show. But as
(18:39):
an adult, it just always seems like these it's sort
of funny but it's ridiculous. These other guys are kind
of always corrupting him because he doesn't seem to fit
in with this group, which is an example of what
happens like you make show friends.
Speaker 3 (18:51):
Mm well, speaking of being adults, I mean, this is
probably like I watched you know, the party scene, the
birthday scene, and the drinking and the shit talking and
you know, the planting of the maybe this affair and
all this stuff, and I was just like, are these
people grown ass people?
Speaker 1 (19:09):
You know?
Speaker 3 (19:09):
Like, for me, yeah, this is insane. I'm just like
I did that when I was sixteen and barely did
it at sixt eighteen, you know what I mean.
Speaker 2 (19:17):
Just partying, like the partying, like the planes going yeah,
like the yeah, the just I.
Speaker 3 (19:22):
Mean, I know that's what reality television is supposed to be,
and I know that that's the drama and the juice
and the tea and all that, but I'm just like,
these are grown ass people with children, you know what.
Speaker 2 (19:30):
I'm like, You're just a definite breed. I'm a homebody.
It sounds like you're a harm but homebody totally.
Speaker 3 (19:36):
I brought my meditation and my hot yoga, which, by
the way, I mean just a little juice for you,
which is completely ironic that we are speaking and that
I'm even talking about the Housewives, because I never really
really watched a night Like I said, I'm boring. I'm
not like throwing tables and getting drunken public or anything.
But two a year ago, the Housewives Beverly Hills contacted me,
(20:02):
and so I went through a whole series of technically
auditions to be on the Real Housewives of Beverly Hills.
Little juice spread and at the time, I was just like,
why would they I am so not of the breed,
you know, I don't think you know, I'm like I
would be the super like on the matt reading meditations,
(20:22):
journaling with people type of character. But it was funny,
I it was. It was interesting for me to consender.
I was tempted because, as you well know, I mean,
it's like, you know, it's that type of positioning could
help anyone's career or further or all the things I
did want that maybe aren't on that show. I could
probably you know, further and develop and grow because of
(20:45):
having that type of platform. So yes, I was tempted,
but I thought, I just don't know how I would.
And by the way, some of those women I do
know probably the best, just because we're all in LA
and are friends of mine but not friends, but you know,
friends LA friends. And I was tempted, but it didn't
work out in the end anyway. Maybe that's why, because
(21:06):
they're like, well, she's gonna be way too safe and
not nearly entertaining enough.
Speaker 1 (21:10):
And you want to know what, I'll tell you something.
Speaker 2 (21:12):
There are girls that in thinking about everything I'm going
through right now, which I'll talk about separately also on
this podcast I'm having, I'm doing a lot of reflecting,
and I'm thinking about my participation in the toxicity in
certain areas things I just said anecdotally about people on
my show and other casts, like informer blogs we used
(21:33):
to do or when Pride and I'm watching What Happens
Live and things that were not nice, and that is
the nature of that genre. And I bring this up
because people like Kristin Takman, who I met on the show,
or Tinsley who I met on the show, are actually
really lovely people, and I got into it a lot
with them on the show because they're not great housewives.
(21:56):
Because they're not they weren't maybe raised by animals and
ready to like go to battle in a way that
I'm capable of.
Speaker 1 (22:03):
You know, they they're maybe not.
Speaker 2 (22:06):
They may not always jump off the page and have
the funniest, immediate, snarky quick comment like a professional like
sniper like I am. And sometimes and sometimes with people
like that, I didn't really connect with them because we
were on a battlefield, but like there was no time
for like normalcy and friendship. And I'm doing a lot
(22:29):
of reflecting about that because it's very relevant. It is
a little mean girls, and it is very high school
in the sense that I've seen other shows, other housewives shows,
and I've seen people that, in my opinion and for
my judgmental standards, have done some sleazy, trashy things in
their lives right, and then they've been murdered for it
(22:53):
and they've had to live it down forever. And I've
been part of that entire sphere that judge that because
action the viewers too. Just like we're in high school.
If someone in my high school slept with six guys,
I probably would have thought and said they were a slut. Okay,
And as an adult now who has a daughter, the
slut which is a terrible word has parents who are
(23:18):
watching people say mean things because of whatever choices that
child made.
Speaker 1 (23:21):
I could cry.
Speaker 2 (23:21):
And I'm thinking about housewives and bad decisions and where
the line is and how it's ruined their lives when
people have found out things about them that and ruined
their lives. And I've been part of that entire atmosphere, thinking, saying, judging,
being asked about it. I'm watching it happens live like
some anecdotal comment, and it's really hurt a lot of people,
(23:42):
not just me, the whole medium. And there is a line.
It's been entirely crossed. And you know, someone asked me
the other day if this is my penance. It was
not intentionally my penance, but in being manic in my
house this morning and cleaning out like five bags of
clothes as if it was like some weird obsession because
I'm like not dealing with what I really need to
(24:03):
be dealing with. Yeah, I said to this reporter, I
think it might be my penance. So I say that
to you as somebody who I don't think would necessarily
be a good housewife, and that's probably a good thing.
Speaker 3 (24:13):
Well, it's all I know. It is a good thing
because all I know at this age of and with
all I've learned and the wisdom I've I guess gained,
and the beauty of aging is I know myself better
than I've ever known myself, and I wouldn't. I could
not fake the funk, nor would I want to. What
that would do to my energy, my spirit, And it's
just not worth it. It's not worth it for a paycheck.
No thank you now.
Speaker 2 (24:33):
No knowing that you were tempted says what the whole
thing is meaning? You want to be more successful. I'm
sure you want to make more money. You want to,
you know, and you would go on and if you
were doing really well, you might end up on anti
anxiety medication, which many housewives do, and you might realize
you had a great season because you had it going good,
(24:54):
and then the next season, because it's a zero sum games,
someone has to take you down. So someone's always winning,
someone's always losing, someone's always killing, and someone's always getting killed.
So I've definitely been part of that.
Speaker 3 (25:06):
That sounds like my absolute worst nightmare, right There couldn't
be anything that would hurt more. It just sounds. It
sounds excruciating. How do you survive that, like, how.
Speaker 2 (25:16):
Do you millions of dollars and going in there with
eight thousand dollars in my bank account to my name,
growing up in a very abusive household and environment and
at the racetrack being a survivor, living the hunger games,
being in nightclubs at thirteen years old, doing very terrible
things that I shouldn't be doing. That I would die
if my daughter was doing. I was raised like an animal,
(25:37):
So how did I do it? That's out because that's
what I you know, when I was broke and I
was going to the top. But am I proud of
my entire involvement at this time moment in time?
Speaker 1 (25:47):
No?
Speaker 3 (25:48):
No, But you know, well, it's like what you mentioned.
It can change people's lives. It can ruin people's lives,
it can end their careers. Like the consequences like, yeah,
that's the risk. People gamble, You get in and then look.
Speaker 2 (26:01):
What happens and can happen to people within It's no
different than what I'm saying. Within an episode or a season,
it's kill or be killed, and someone's always winning or losing.
Speaker 1 (26:12):
Within the entire.
Speaker 2 (26:13):
Sphere and game, it's also someone's always winning and losing.
Arianna is winning. That girl over Keel is fully losing.
This one's winning, the other one's fully losing, and it
affects their entire life. And both Arianna and Raquel have
parents that have to watch whatever.
Speaker 1 (26:31):
This rollercoaster is so.
Speaker 3 (26:32):
Anxiety hearing you talk about this. No wonder, I I mean, like.
Speaker 2 (26:35):
Ter never look back, don't worry, You're better for so
all right, So now we're at this guy's birthday. Now,
this poor guy's birthday. Now, I don't really care if
(26:57):
he's cheated or hasn't cheated.
Speaker 1 (26:59):
I don't know.
Speaker 2 (27:00):
They have four kids too, And I couldn't believe it.
I had never seen it. I couldn't believe it. And
in many cases I've been teamed Teresa, but not based
on watching the show, based on just like a mother
went to jail, like came back. She's honest about who
she is. She's a fighter, survivor. Like it's kind of
(27:21):
just like what I've what I think I know. I
haven't watched that much of Housewives. I've watched individual episodes
for the show, and just throughout my life, I've never
been dedicated. So that was pretty horrendous. Like that's as
bad as I've ever seen, And I don't care what
the girl did to her at this point, I don't care.
(27:44):
I can't believe she walked through someone's birthday party that
she was attending and spread a rumor like that's really bad.
That's that was disgusting.
Speaker 3 (27:52):
I was despicable. It's despicable. And I've been in that
situation where we've heard something that's going on in you know,
about a friend or a friend's partner and the cheating
room or whatever. There were twenty five other ways she
could have went about this. Then to go do that
behind her back at a night where they're celebrating, like
(28:12):
dropping that little rumor in every little at every corner
of that party that she could it was really That's
when I was just like, can this be real? Or
is this reality television? Because that was a terrible, terrible decision.
And then when they do confront one another about her,
when Jackie confronts Teresa and then uses the analogy that
it's like Jackie's spreading a rumor about Teresa's daughter doing
(28:35):
cocaine in the bathroom at school or something and telling
everybody but her, and then Teresa loses her and calls her.
Speaker 2 (28:42):
Yeah, it wasn't justified at all, Teresa, no argument. Yeah,
she was using an analogy saying it would be like
me saying yes, And it was smart of her to
say that, and yeah, of course yeah, and then for
her to get crazy that just that was nuts. But
the thing is to answer your question how it goes down.
And this is why this whole sphere of is it
(29:04):
real and what is reality is going to come crashing
down like a house of cards, because.
Speaker 1 (29:12):
What is it reality?
Speaker 2 (29:14):
That Teresa said to a producer and maybe a friend,
something that she heard from one person, Yeah, that's reality.
In her life, she's working on a reality show with
people she's friends with, not friends with, has alliances because
of television, and she has producers at her house all
the time. There's tape up on the walls because they
have cameras all the time. So she told a friend
and maybe a friend told the producer. Because it's always
(29:36):
killing or being killed. There's always if there's new meat,
new content, someone wants to bring it to the forefront.
No one can happen without bringing it to the forefront.
So no, that's not real, because in your real life
there are a lot of things you know and have heard,
and you don't bring it to the forefront.
Speaker 1 (29:49):
So a producer has.
Speaker 2 (29:51):
A meeting with her and then is in the car
with her and before she gets Mike to go into
a scene, and one hundred percent said, are you going
to mention what you heard from?
Speaker 1 (30:01):
Blah blah blah and a.
Speaker 2 (30:03):
Not that intelligent house, So I doesn't make choices for
themselves and goes in like a robot and delivers, you know,
messages that they're told from producers. So she went in
and she also was drunk. You're drinking a lot of alcohol,
which I also am starting to have a problem with.
Where's the line when producers will say this person cannot
be served anymore. We're in a workplace that's going to
come out too. Yes, everyone can drink, it's real life.
(30:26):
But the cameras add thirst they want. They make drinking
seem like a very good idea.
Speaker 1 (30:32):
I've been there.
Speaker 2 (30:33):
I don't I'm not a massive drinker, but you feel
like you're adrenaline so high, you're so stressed out. You
got cameras, and it's a good idea of pound drinks just.
Speaker 3 (30:43):
Games, so you know you're you could be killed at
any moment.
Speaker 2 (30:45):
You'reas you're stressed out and you're not drinking a lot
of water, and you drink more and no housewife will disagree,
okay none. No one's forcing you to drink alcohol like
they say. I've said that publicly about a Viva dresser.
No one's flying you alcohol. But who's holding back from
what's not correct in the workplace? So people get excited
on reality TV the more people get wasted. They get
(31:07):
excited if somebody goes off the wagon uses drugs as
a rumor, everything bad is good in the upside down.
So this so Teresa goes and thinks it's a good
idea to get this out into the forefront. And it
is good in reality TV because it's horrendous and it
means we can do twelve scenes coming off of that.
And I've been part of it and I've been the
(31:28):
ringleader in it, so just so you know, but it
was really not It was not great, and I'm a
hypocrite for saying it. But this is the episode that
I'm watching, and this is what I.
Speaker 3 (31:38):
Think, well, because everybody in I think with any kind
of reasonable judgment and morality when we're not on a
reality show, if one hears that about their friend's boyfriend husband, whatever,
What do you do? Two things? One you're considering do
I say anything at all? Because is it just a rumor?
(31:59):
Or are there seats that I can actually back this up?
And two you go to the friend. You don't go
to strangers in a party. You don't go call on somebody.
You don't send out a group text to everyone you
know other than your friend. You go to your friend.
Speaker 2 (32:14):
Yes, and yeah, I don't think it's her friend, it's
her showfriend, which also isn't real. It's a show structure
where you put with other people. So many times these
reality shows make people film and say you can't leave,
and it's called because how can you make someone film
their life? Like?
Speaker 1 (32:32):
That's not real?
Speaker 2 (32:33):
No one can come to my house today and put
a CA So you sign up for something that may
not be may not seem as intense as it's going
to be. And so and then Melissa said it best
when she said, can we just rewind? Like she wants
to rewind the occurrence the faces that everyone's making, Margaret,
everyone they're a guest. It's just it's it's outrageous that
(32:55):
it went on. It didn't make for an entertaining show.
I will say that it did make for an entertainer
show one hundred percent. And then Joe, Melissa's husband is like, yeah,
he's a good looking guy. Like as him being a
good looking guy and anything to do having an affair.
Speaker 3 (33:08):
That's hired me so much. I'm like, and is as
if she's not a good looking woman who deserves a
faithful husband.
Speaker 1 (33:15):
I don't understand that at all.
Speaker 2 (33:17):
And it's funny because sometimes Paul will say with me
about we're having a dispute, and he'll say to me,
it wasn't the message, it was the messaging. Like I
the messaging in this was so bad. I don't even
care what this man chooses to do with his personal life.
Speaker 1 (33:30):
It doesn't matter to me.
Speaker 2 (33:31):
It was this is so disrespectful at his birthday party,
and how embarrassing too to see him and her and
I love you and amazing and she's having the best
night of her life and she's in her interview saying
how amazing is And that's the number one thing that
people hate about an affair, not even the act, but
feeling like the fool.
Speaker 3 (33:49):
The fool, right, Yes, that's it. That's the worst, not
knowing the secrets, the deceit, the deceit because you feel
like such an idiot.
Speaker 1 (34:00):
And everybody else knew and it's taught.
Speaker 2 (34:01):
Yeah, like you're the village idiot totally.
Speaker 3 (34:06):
So been there last relationship.
Speaker 2 (34:09):
But wow, gods is like this was like design for you. Yeah,
you feel like the idiot fool.
Speaker 3 (34:14):
Oh my god, that's I mean, listen, there is such
a thing. I don't know if it's happily ever after.
I'm in the healthiest relationship right now that I've ever
been into my adult life. But my ex and I've
spoken about this on my podcast and he knows it.
And but he I was. He was a chronic serial
cheater and I learned. I learned the biggest life lesson
(34:39):
truly of my forty eight years through that relationship. And
it hurt and it sucked. And do you know how
many dms bephany I got from other women like, uh,
are you still with that guy because he's boning my friend?
I mean, like whole day long. It was devastating and hurtful,
and then you lose your s of self and then
(35:01):
you're walking on eggshells and then you're gas lits. So
many times you don't know what the truth is, what
the lies are. I was in that kind of relations
show that and so I get it. I know that
feeling of just betrayal. It's like the it's the worst, worst,
worst feeling, and then you and then you can only
blame that person and point the finger so long before
(35:23):
you have to point the finger at yourself and go,
why why am I staying? What is my part? How
have I contributed? Like? Why why did I allow that?
I knew the truth? You know, I allowed it one
too many times. So I had a lot of healing
to do from that. Yes, exactly, yeah, I had.
Speaker 2 (35:40):
There was a woman on New York Housewives and I
brought in to the show the fact, and I was
very upset to do it, and she wasn't a good
friend of mine, which I was, I admitted, but she
wasn't not on the show with me, and it was
sort of my responsibility, and I did bring it into
the show. There was a man that she was with
that she was about to marry, and I thought he
was terrible. So it's a little bit of a different circumstance.
(36:02):
And someone married for years, loves him and has four kids,
someone is about to marry someone who everyone knows is
a cheater and not a great guy. And I brought
it into the show, and I still it came back
like a boomerang, and I still felt bad about it
because she ended up marrying him, and she was one
of the women that doesn't want to know. And so
I realized there are women that don't want to know
(36:23):
and a woman who and I'm not saying the guy
did anything. I don't know a thing about this man,
but a woman of four children who's happy certainly doesn't
want to know.
Speaker 3 (36:33):
No, No, it's so funny you bring that up because,
oh god, I'm saying probably more than I should. But
when my last partner went on to get in another relationship,
people are like, oh, man, do you think she knows?
Like once you're you know, a leopard doesn't change his stripes,
Like is she just going to be the next person
dealing with this type of devastation or whatever? And my
(36:54):
yoga self is over here going, oh, people change, like
I really do. Do you wish everybody the best? I
wish I've win the best. It doesn't It doesn't behoove
me to wish people misery and pain, right, But I'm
like you know, people do change, maybe changed, maybe they're
you know, she's the perfect fit for him and good
for them, happily ever after whatever. But then it's also,
like I said, the same thing I said, also, maybe
(37:16):
maybe she's that type of woman who's like maybe they
haven't don't put a relationship right, I know, maybe like
she's like down with like three simes, or maybe she's
fulfilling that need that he never received with perhaps me
or other women. So you just don't know what's going
on within people.
Speaker 1 (37:31):
No, exactly.
Speaker 2 (37:32):
Most women have some sense of something and they choose
their own adventure. But that's the thing about back to
being on a reality show, and I'm with you that
I think it was entire I think she handled herself
with grace.
Speaker 1 (37:44):
I really do.
Speaker 2 (37:45):
She didn't go crazy, which I would have gone crazy,
and she was very civilized, and she was very embarrassed,
and she was honest about being embarrassed, and she was like,
please just retract this, Like she was really very dignified
in my opinion, in that scenario. And then Teresa acted
in a way as if she Teresa. Actually I never
(38:06):
knew the word gas lip back in the day, and
it's overused, but it's used properly here in that Teresa
was gaslighting her by projecting the fact that she had
just said something about Teresa's daughter like you're a piece
of shit, Like I mean, Jackie was entirely justified in
saying it would be like me hearing a rumor about
your daughter and saying and it really hit close to
(38:28):
home for Teresa.
Speaker 3 (38:29):
I also think she knew she was so in the
wrong already that it just gave her a reason to
eject herself from the whole thing. That's kind I think
she was just like, oh, okay, fine, I'm gonna get
so pissed about this and just leave. It appeared to
me like she that gave her some type of ammunition
to justify leaving the conversation.
Speaker 1 (38:47):
When was the ultimate turnaround? Yeah, so yeah.
Speaker 2 (38:51):
So it's funny because I've been having this fleeting thought
of like, should I be doing this show anymore? Because
I'm coming so heavily against this entire genre, not just
of this show, but other shows and just a genre
of mistreatment in a very new medium in the world
compared to television and film and all this. And then
(39:12):
I have conversations like this and I realized why I
am doing it, and I like this show because we're
utilizing it as a vehicle. We're not trashing bashing, like
we're actually understanding people that have been portrayed badly on
these shows. So I love doing it and you are
so perfect to do it with because you attribute it
to your own life, which I'm sure you never thought
you'd be doing.
Speaker 3 (39:33):
No. But at the end of the day, I mean,
I love women, I just do. That's why I enjoyed
watching this episode. Was reminded of how firstly funny a
lot of it was for me. I giggled a lot.
I like, you know, when you're talking back at an
episode or a TV show, you know it's a good one.
But like, I do have compassion for everybody, and I
(39:55):
just I felt compassion for Jackie in that situation, you know,
like talking shit at Teresa. Sorry, not sorry Teresa. You know,
but but I think you know, we all, you know,
it's kind of the beauty of life, Like we're all
just living our own journey, but it's nice to dip
into other people's journeys and it's it's fun.
Speaker 2 (40:16):
Well, you were amazing, I mean really amazing. You look beautiful.
I'm so happy you're in a beautiful relationship in a
beautiful place. And I'm happy you didn't do the Housewives
because it would somehow swallow you up and spit you out.
And the risk is too great at a place in
your life where you are now middle aged and you
are happy, the risk is too great. Look, you know
(40:37):
Kathy Hilton left. She did not need that. So I
think everything happened.
Speaker 1 (40:42):
For a reason. I appreciate you coming and talking.
Speaker 3 (40:44):
About it, Bethany. I really am a fan of yours
and I love what you put into the world and
you you you have a communication style I will never
ever have you just so like your opinion, Like you're
just so interesting and raw, and you don't think before
you speak, but you're so good at it, you know
what I mean, Like you don't need to and I
(41:05):
love what you do as an activist, and I love
that you are in the middle of this important conversation
during the strike and who knows what's going to happen
with all that, But like we need people like you,
and so you should come on my podcast sometime. I'd
love to talk with you about some of the these important,
deep issues.
Speaker 1 (41:25):
I think it would be great, perfect, wonderful.
Speaker 3 (41:27):
And how you've changed, Like I love hearing you say
about your own evolution and looking back and you know,
reflecting on what those shows meant to you, you know
at that time in your life, and how we all are,
you know, shedding different versions of ourselves and end up
you know anew and maybe that's you know where you
are right now. So I don't know, but I like
to get into it with you.
Speaker 1 (41:47):
Amazing love to thank you so much, Kat, thank you.
I have a great day.
See you next Tuesday. In Jersey.
Speaker 2 (00:06):
It's the season eleven premiere, and there is never a
dull moment. Dolores and David fight over her plastic surgery.
Teresa goes around Evan's birthday party talking about him, and
Jackie makes a comment about Gia that has Teresa fired up.
Entertainment reporter and host of the podcast It Sure is
a Beautiful Day, Kat Sadler joins me to break down
the episode. This is real Housewives of New Jersey, Season eleven,
(00:29):
episode one, See You next Tuesday. Let's get into it.
So are you a Housewives fan? Do you have you
watched for years?
Speaker 1 (00:44):
Do you have a specific favorite city?
Speaker 3 (00:47):
Okay, so, Bethany, you know, when I was on E
covering this stuff every day, I was responsible for kind
of watching everything, right, you have to be a bit
of an expert on everything. And so as much as
like I have had the pleasure of interviewing you before
and Housewives from every franchise, I have never been an avid,
(01:07):
like die hard plot line savvy viewer. So it's like
I know a little bit about everything, but you know,
I had to watch the Kardashians. I had to watch
you know, I had to watch the Emmy nominated scripted shows.
Speaker 2 (01:20):
So it's kind of like, I know enough, but I
knowly fluent, but I get by.
Speaker 3 (01:25):
I am not fluent at at all, really, but it
was so fun watching this episode because I'm like, why
am I not watching more? Because my life is so
boring these days and I watch I'm usually like into
the super like dramatic successions of the world and you know,
like I like like really dark scripted stuff dramas. So
I was watching this and I had the best time.
(01:47):
I was like, oh, this is this is my new
my new thing.
Speaker 1 (01:49):
It was.
Speaker 3 (01:50):
It was fantastic. It was fun.
Speaker 2 (01:51):
This is Jersey and I'm not fluent either. I speak
the language better than you, and I have institutional knowledge
because I've been inside show, but some of these episodes,
I have never seen this episode either.
Speaker 1 (02:03):
I don't know who everybody is either.
Speaker 2 (02:06):
I mean I have heard their names and seeing their faces,
but I don't know the characters that well either.
Speaker 3 (02:10):
So well, let me just tell you one fun fact
before we get into this. Only because you know, as
far as my knowledge goes, I had the crazy assignment
this had to be you might know more than me.
But when Teresa got out of prison. When would that
have been, Like.
Speaker 1 (02:26):
I have the one the literally maybe five years ago,
maybe longer.
Speaker 3 (02:31):
I feel like this was maybe ten years ago. But
as someone who didn't know the franchise that well, somehow
I got the first post jail house interview with Teresa
and this was in New York City and it was
in a hotel room and it was three hours of exclusive.
You had the exclusive, and I was the reporter on this.
(02:52):
So that's that's what I remember. Gosh, that was almost
eight years eight years ago. Yeah, and I got to
sit down with her and like hear her talk about
her prison experience or whatever. So that was like the biggest,
most in depth like moment. And so it was wild
to like watch her in this episode and just see
how much has changed him where she is and I
had no idea, so I kind of got caught up
(03:13):
on all that.
Speaker 2 (03:14):
And now right now, I'm sure you know she's married
and it's controversial too, and it's just a crazy environment.
But Delores and Frank, I don't know what season she started,
but I think Frank is her ex husband and she
shares a son with him, so you saw that she
has a son. I think he's like, you know, he
looks like a hot kid, but I think people think
he's like a really hot son and and he It's
(03:38):
what was interesting to me was that he was friend.
He seems like he's very close with her current boyfriend
who's a doctor.
Speaker 3 (03:44):
Yes, yeah, did you see that in the kitchen. I
did see that in the kitchen. I was trying to
piece together, like, Okay, what are all the moving parts here?
And yeah he By the way, my son is off
to college next week, so I like I get the whole, like,
oh my god, grown man but still a child. And
he was studying for his what trying to get into
business score or something. Anyway, Yeah, that's an interesting dynamic.
(04:09):
She's like living with her ex right like on occasion.
Speaker 1 (04:12):
No, I don't know.
Speaker 2 (04:13):
She seems always like it seems like her ACX is
always her date and her plus one. And this audience,
this Bravo audience, myself including likes this guy Frank. He's
a good fun character and he's you know, he's like
this like cute sweet meathead that is just always around her.
And I don't know if he really is in love
with her. They're best friends, they've worked together. I think
I think they've done houses together, but he seems like
(04:36):
a good guy and it just didn't work from a
relationship standpoint. I think he might have cheated on her
when they were together or something. But it's weird to
watch when you know that she has broken up with
this other guy. I don't know when or who she's
with now, but I think it's in like my periphery
that she's not with this guy, and this is sort
of like they're setting up with the fact that they're
(04:56):
going to break up. So I'm of course thinking about
what's going to happen with the son and this guy's relationship.
But when a son is older, when a child is older,
they're an adult and they have their own phone number
and text and emails so they can have whatever relationships
they want.
Speaker 1 (05:11):
He's an adult.
Speaker 3 (05:12):
Yeah, completely, completely. I don't know enough about the backstory,
but but it's hard to keep up. It's hard to
keep up. Do you know that? That's exactly what I mean.
I'm sorry, I'm not bringing it back to myself again,
but this is exactly this is exactly what's going on
in my life at the moment. I moved to Malibu
because of my new partner. I've been dating for two
(05:33):
years and I have two sons and they're eighteen and
twenty two. And it's so interesting because they have such
a great relationship with their own dad that it takes
the pressure off because to your point, it's like they
can be as close to Greg as they want to be.
They can like connect with them, they can golf with them,
they can you know, gro out with him if they
want to, but they don't have to. They're old, they're older,
(05:57):
you know what I mean. Like, so it's kind of
like letting it or gan evolve to the level that
they want to and they can come here as much
as they want, and they don't have to be here
if they don't want to be. It's kind of nice.
It's kind of freeing when your kids do get older
in that sense that when you are choosing a partner,
as so many middle aged women are, you know, maybe
the second time around, or third time around, or who
(06:17):
knows what, but you can actually choose for yourself. And
obviously you want your kids and your family to adore
your partner, but if they don't, it's not the end
of the world. It's not a deal breaker.
Speaker 2 (06:27):
Well, first of all, yes, do apply it to yourself.
Don't say I don't want to make I want you
to apply it to yourself, because that's literally what the
show is about. It's funny that I just walk into
something and you happen to be experiencing it, which I
do like this show as a vehicle for that. But yeah,
and I find when kids are little kids, you're kind
of just like sticking them in a car seat and
they're doing what you want them to do, and if
(06:48):
they don't like someone that you're with, they'll make a comment,
or if someone doesn't like you, it makes you feel
really bad and it's something you have to deal with
and you think it's going to last forever. For those
of you listening that are in blended families or blended
relationship or step kids that hate you or whatever, things
like that are really just a moment in time, and
even more so where if there's blending, even teens, tweens,
(07:11):
high school, college, there are so few moments that everybody
has to be all together at the same time. Like
that's what holidays before, That's why holidays are stressful. But
in my well, I have a blended situation. We all
have a great relationship. But it's not that often that
everyone is actually together, because there's time that my daughter's
with a father and I'm with my daughter and I'm
(07:31):
with my fiance and he is this kid likes. It's
hard to corral an entire stable, you know of animals,
so so to your point, especially when they're older, everybody
kind of can have the relationship they want to have.
And yes, the pressure is off. People are adults. They
can say what's on their mind. And a child adult
can say, I think that's disrespectful what you just said
(07:51):
to me, and an adult adult can say you're spoiled
and you know whatever.
Speaker 1 (07:56):
Like kind of people have voices, Yes.
Speaker 3 (07:59):
They do, and it is hard to corral everybody, and
sometimes it's good kind of to not. I mean, life
is so busy and everybody's got their own agendas and
their responsibilities and all of that. I mean, Greg I
just inherited four kids. Greg has four kids, so I
have never dated anyone after having my own children who
(08:19):
was a father, and so this is much less.
Speaker 1 (08:21):
Four four No, that's a lot, right, it's a lot.
Speaker 3 (08:25):
And there of course with their mothers week on, week off,
week one week off, so it's not all the time.
And I think kind of like what you're saying, it's
nice that way in a sesse. It's like they come,
they go. It's not one hundred percent of the time.
Everybody can come up for air. Everybody has their own
little spaces and places in this world that make them
(08:47):
feel good, and it's the pressure's off because of that.
Speaker 2 (08:49):
I think for sure, Well, it's the good thing that
no one says aloud, Like in twenty twenty three, it's okay,
you might not the relationship might not work for you.
If you had to live with six children in your house,
you might not be that. But I couldn't do it.
So I could fall in love with someone who had
four kids. But if I and that's what happens in
the beginning of relationships. That's why people have to really
talk about this stuff more when they're dating and be
honest about it, or listen to people like us who
(09:11):
have experienced it. If you thought you had to eat
the whole entire chicken at once, you might throw up.
Speaker 1 (09:17):
You couldn't handle it.
Speaker 2 (09:18):
Like if I thought I had to have that whole
blended family, the idea of it, it would overwhelm me.
But in real life, like, everything's a living breeding organism,
and it there's no such thing as really traditional now
unless you're twenty four and you both come up together
and the parents are best friends and everyone travels together
and it's like an Italian family from the sixties.
Speaker 3 (09:37):
Yeah, And just to add one more layer, I mean here,
I am about to be literally Bethanny. In five days.
I dropped my son off at college, my baby, and
I'm like, I was about to be an empty nester.
And some you know, my friends are like, cool, wait
a minute. You were literally about your whole world could
open up. You could do anything, go anywhere, have any job,
(09:57):
take on any project. The freedom was literally right here
in front of my face. And of course I fall
in love with someone with four young kids, and that
wasn't consideration. It was just like Kat, They're like, are
you sure you want to sign up for that? You know,
and they're lovely and they're such great children, and I
keep saying that. They're like yeah, but still it's four kids.
Speaker 1 (10:14):
No, no, no, it's exactly so.
Speaker 3 (10:16):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (10:17):
People do distance, people do divorce, people do widow people
do everything. So I agree, And that's interesting. That's funny
that that kitchen conversation brought this whole thing up. So
the next topic that was interesting to me about Dolores was,
you know, new ass new DIDs, and she didn't tell
her life partner. Now that is really interesting.
Speaker 3 (10:39):
How does that even happen?
Speaker 1 (10:41):
I don't actually know.
Speaker 2 (10:44):
Maybe he was on a business trip where she said
she was at a spot. I don't that's a great point.
I don't know if we saw that, but I didn't
see it wasn't in this episode. Obviously she doesn't have
to ask him, and she knows he's very against elective surgery.
But I think you just have to tell your partner
about something we were going under, and I just it's
a I can't imagine being in that dynamic. I mean,
(11:05):
I wouldn't have to ask Paul's permission to do anything,
but right he would feel hurt if I didn't include him.
So that's a cautionary tale about their relationship. I think,
I think it's nice to have the endorsement. Like you said,
you don't need permission from anybody else, especially your partner,
I don't think, but but but a little support, a
little endorsement. I could not imagine keeping something of that
(11:27):
gravity from someone that yeah, is, but also what about
the compassion and the bedside man or there are times
that my Fance does jiu jitsu and like, you know,
he's he's in his forties and he's strong and he's
good at it, but sometimes he goes too hard and
that he hurts himself. He doesn't want to admit it
because he feels like an idiot that he hurt himself.
But I'm still there, like, are you okay? Whether I
(11:47):
thought he should have been doing it right after he
was injured before or something, It's still like you want
the bedside manner of someone if you've gone through surgery.
Speaker 1 (11:55):
So I thought that whole thing.
Speaker 2 (11:57):
It's wild, like the show is showing that that relationship
is not.
Speaker 3 (12:00):
Going to work. Yeah, I don't. I don't know how
that's that's that's again possible to a not tell them
and be for them to be anywhere within the vicinity
to be supportive or judge whatever that that is. You'd
think that'd be a little more intimate dynamic. You do know,
I just got a facelift. Do you know this? Oh? No, yes,
this is crazy? Yes me. So that's when I was
(12:23):
watching the episode, I was like.
Speaker 1 (12:25):
Oh, this hell thing is about you.
Speaker 2 (12:26):
I mean, I know, I love my producers and they're
always great a pairing guests. There's no way that they
paired you because of all this, that then they would
be savants and genius.
Speaker 1 (12:36):
Like your episode. Okay, so go ahead. That's funny.
Speaker 3 (12:39):
It's crazy because I this is my first surgery ever,
so I I mean, yeah, it is. Technically it is
my first and certainly my first cosmetic surgery. And I
had a facelift, I had a necklift, and I had
a buffer of PLASTI with my eyes. And I've been
talking about what is the bluff it's like removing the
skin from the hooded hoodedness. Yes, And just how long
(13:03):
ago the surgery was in May? So I'm all, I'm
about two months and some change since I had so new,
it's very new. It's been kind of all I've been
talking about and healing from still healing, like even my
ears are a little numb and look amazing.
Speaker 2 (13:22):
I mean, I can't I need to see like now,
I need to see what you looked like before again,
But you look amazing, always are beautiful.
Speaker 3 (13:28):
But I'm so happy with the results and nice, I'm so,
so so happy and I've been talking about this because
so much of kind of what I am speaking about
with my own audiences these days is about you know,
being a middle aged woman and what's available to us
and how to feel good in our bodies, like all
of it, the vain, you know, cosmetic side, internal subject,
the whole thing. Oh God, bless, oh God, bless. A
(13:50):
great doctor, great doctor. But it was funny because for
me and my little bubble in my little world, even
though I've you know, been in Hollywood for ages, it
was a big deal for me to do that. I mean,
it's a very big decision. And that I watched this episode,
I was like, oh, I don't feel so bad. Everybody's
been under the knife and she's had her butt done,
her this done or it's done.
Speaker 1 (14:10):
You know, did you feel.
Speaker 2 (14:11):
Weird in a fairly new relationship to say to him?
Did you feel self conscious and like weird and old
like that? You're but he has four kids, so he's
not a spring chicken at for kids.
Speaker 3 (14:22):
He is older, he's four years older. He's fifty, you know,
five years older. And but it was back to this
plot line, like I there is no way literally not
as an out of possibility that I would be in
a relationship and this wouldn't be a consideration for both
of us to have that discussion.
Speaker 1 (14:40):
I mean, of course that's what you're that's the point.
Speaker 3 (14:43):
Yeah. I was like, of course I did. I was like,
what do you think? And and his big thing was,
I just want you to still look like you, Like,
I don't want to end up with a new girlfriend
that comes home from the doctor. And it's like, I
have a brand new person in my life. So, you know,
he expressed his concerns. I comfort him seventeen different ways
that I knew how to say. That's also what I want.
So we talked about eight length and yes he is
(15:06):
happy and he comments often, and you know, I'm like, cee, cee, like,
you know good.
Speaker 1 (15:11):
I mean, it's so nice.
Speaker 2 (15:12):
Yeah, that's so funny that this is the episode. And
the woman Margaret who's on the show, I don't know
if she's talked about plastic surgery, and certainly on that
one to quote unquote out, but everybody on the show
seems pretty open about the woman Dolores that had the
butt stuff. She's one of the only people that she's
one of the only housewives who admit that they're on
(15:34):
ozempic or munjaro or one of those, or semi glue
tie whatever, and there has been a sweeping, dramatic housewife
weight loss, and everyone's just acting like in their fifties
and menopause, they just started losing weight. And it's really
stupid and hilarious at the same time. It's funny, but
like I think that they've just it's become more common,
so now they probably would have admitted it, but they're
(15:55):
stuck in the lie because they are ready lied about it.
But I'm not saying that's Margaret. I don't even know
if she's on ozempi. I don't know what she looked
like before, but she looks very fresh. Like I feel
like I've seen her a lot in the press and
other things. She looks her face looks very very she's
a fresh look.
Speaker 1 (16:10):
I think.
Speaker 3 (16:11):
Well, and it's going on so much more. I mean,
you know, like, you know, I don't know if people
are everybody's getting a facelift these days, but you know,
I love it. And you look at someone and you're like,
they look so refreshed to your point, and people are like,
oh my god, you know she had such and such
makeup artists do her makeup, and it's like, I don't
think that's like a really well done eyeliner. I think
(16:32):
that's a lot about the filter.
Speaker 1 (16:34):
How would you know?
Speaker 2 (16:35):
I mean, you could just do a filter and then
you have a facelift every day you never left your house.
You could just do everything in a filter and it
would be you don't have to do the surgery.
Speaker 3 (16:44):
I know you really, you really literally would not have
you know, let's talk.
Speaker 2 (16:59):
About this jen Aden scenario. She's got I think she's Turkish,
she's got this. She's got her mother, her old fashioned
mother who her and her father and siblings are kind
of talking about. And the father's moved in and they're
all trashing this mom. But I'm just thinking about on TV, like,
you know, talking about the mom and having the dad
(17:20):
move in.
Speaker 1 (17:20):
It just seemed like a little cringey.
Speaker 3 (17:24):
I know, I found myself thinking, well, dear God, I
hope they're not watching.
Speaker 1 (17:28):
Right, like, yeah, like, what's the upside of this?
Speaker 2 (17:31):
Well?
Speaker 3 (17:31):
I feel I feel like she tried to make it
like put a button on it by saying, no matter what,
all of my mother or in every relationship with all
of our mothers is strained. But yeah, it wasn't necessarily
a good look. I mean, I don't know, because you
would know you're of the reality ilk, but like how
much of that is talking about in advance or or
(17:53):
sometimes if there's nothing nothing going on? Is that just like.
Speaker 1 (17:56):
Almost like.
Speaker 2 (17:58):
A character needs to have something going on and a story,
and so Britans just sit down and ask what's going
on in your life? And they might see what's going
on in the house and the father's living there, and
then she says, my father's living here, and then they're
probably like, well, we have to go into that because
your father's living here.
Speaker 3 (18:12):
But they it's not a little like that to me,
Like it wasn't like a lot, but it was almost
like making it something. I don't know.
Speaker 2 (18:19):
Yes, I agree, it's funny because jen Aiden's husband is
a doctor. I think he's a plastic surgeon. It's funny
he parties with those other guys a lot, and it
just it seems like they're always giving him shots and
he's always hung over, and it just seems like he's
adhering to peer pressure on a reality show. But as
(18:39):
an adult, it just always seems like these it's sort
of funny but it's ridiculous. These other guys are kind
of always corrupting him because he doesn't seem to fit
in with this group, which is an example of what
happens like you make show friends.
Speaker 3 (18:51):
Mm well, speaking of being adults, I mean, this is
probably like I watched you know, the party scene, the
birthday scene, and the drinking and the shit talking and
you know, the planting of the maybe this affair and
all this stuff, and I was just like, are these
people grown ass people?
Speaker 1 (19:09):
You know?
Speaker 3 (19:09):
Like, for me, yeah, this is insane. I'm just like
I did that when I was sixteen and barely did
it at sixt eighteen, you know what I mean.
Speaker 2 (19:17):
Just partying, like the partying, like the planes going yeah,
like the yeah, the just I.
Speaker 3 (19:22):
Mean, I know that's what reality television is supposed to be,
and I know that that's the drama and the juice
and the tea and all that, but I'm just like,
these are grown ass people with children, you know what.
Speaker 2 (19:30):
I'm like, You're just a definite breed. I'm a homebody.
It sounds like you're a harm but homebody totally.
Speaker 3 (19:36):
I brought my meditation and my hot yoga, which, by
the way, I mean just a little juice for you,
which is completely ironic that we are speaking and that
I'm even talking about the Housewives, because I never really
really watched a night Like I said, I'm boring. I'm
not like throwing tables and getting drunken public or anything.
But two a year ago, the Housewives Beverly Hills contacted me,
(20:02):
and so I went through a whole series of technically
auditions to be on the Real Housewives of Beverly Hills.
Little juice spread and at the time, I was just like,
why would they I am so not of the breed,
you know, I don't think you know, I'm like I
would be the super like on the matt reading meditations,
(20:22):
journaling with people type of character. But it was funny,
I it was. It was interesting for me to consender.
I was tempted because, as you well know, I mean,
it's like, you know, it's that type of positioning could
help anyone's career or further or all the things I
did want that maybe aren't on that show. I could
probably you know, further and develop and grow because of
(20:45):
having that type of platform. So yes, I was tempted,
but I thought, I just don't know how I would.
And by the way, some of those women I do
know probably the best, just because we're all in LA
and are friends of mine but not friends, but you know,
friends LA friends. And I was tempted, but it didn't
work out in the end anyway. Maybe that's why, because
(21:06):
they're like, well, she's gonna be way too safe and
not nearly entertaining enough.
Speaker 1 (21:10):
And you want to know what, I'll tell you something.
Speaker 2 (21:12):
There are girls that in thinking about everything I'm going
through right now, which I'll talk about separately also on
this podcast I'm having, I'm doing a lot of reflecting,
and I'm thinking about my participation in the toxicity in
certain areas things I just said anecdotally about people on
my show and other casts, like informer blogs we used
(21:33):
to do or when Pride and I'm watching What Happens
Live and things that were not nice, and that is
the nature of that genre. And I bring this up
because people like Kristin Takman, who I met on the show,
or Tinsley who I met on the show, are actually
really lovely people, and I got into it a lot
with them on the show because they're not great housewives.
(21:56):
Because they're not they weren't maybe raised by animals and
ready to like go to battle in a way that
I'm capable of.
Speaker 1 (22:03):
You know, they they're maybe not.
Speaker 2 (22:06):
They may not always jump off the page and have
the funniest, immediate, snarky quick comment like a professional like
sniper like I am. And sometimes and sometimes with people
like that, I didn't really connect with them because we
were on a battlefield, but like there was no time
for like normalcy and friendship. And I'm doing a lot
(22:29):
of reflecting about that because it's very relevant. It is
a little mean girls, and it is very high school
in the sense that I've seen other shows, other housewives shows,
and I've seen people that, in my opinion and for
my judgmental standards, have done some sleazy, trashy things in
their lives right, and then they've been murdered for it
(22:53):
and they've had to live it down forever. And I've
been part of that entire sphere that judge that because
action the viewers too. Just like we're in high school.
If someone in my high school slept with six guys,
I probably would have thought and said they were a slut. Okay,
And as an adult now who has a daughter, the
slut which is a terrible word has parents who are
(23:18):
watching people say mean things because of whatever choices that
child made.
Speaker 1 (23:21):
I could cry.
Speaker 2 (23:21):
And I'm thinking about housewives and bad decisions and where
the line is and how it's ruined their lives when
people have found out things about them that and ruined
their lives. And I've been part of that entire atmosphere, thinking, saying, judging,
being asked about it. I'm watching it happens live like
some anecdotal comment, and it's really hurt a lot of people,
(23:42):
not just me, the whole medium. And there is a line.
It's been entirely crossed. And you know, someone asked me
the other day if this is my penance. It was
not intentionally my penance, but in being manic in my
house this morning and cleaning out like five bags of
clothes as if it was like some weird obsession because
I'm like not dealing with what I really need to
(24:03):
be dealing with. Yeah, I said to this reporter, I
think it might be my penance. So I say that
to you as somebody who I don't think would necessarily
be a good housewife, and that's probably a good thing.
Speaker 3 (24:13):
Well, it's all I know. It is a good thing
because all I know at this age of and with
all I've learned and the wisdom I've I guess gained,
and the beauty of aging is I know myself better
than I've ever known myself, and I wouldn't. I could
not fake the funk, nor would I want to. What
that would do to my energy, my spirit, And it's
just not worth it. It's not worth it for a paycheck.
No thank you now.
Speaker 2 (24:33):
No knowing that you were tempted says what the whole
thing is meaning? You want to be more successful. I'm
sure you want to make more money. You want to,
you know, and you would go on and if you
were doing really well, you might end up on anti
anxiety medication, which many housewives do, and you might realize
you had a great season because you had it going good,
(24:54):
and then the next season, because it's a zero sum games,
someone has to take you down. So someone's always winning,
someone's always losing, someone's always killing, and someone's always getting killed.
So I've definitely been part of that.
Speaker 3 (25:06):
That sounds like my absolute worst nightmare, right There couldn't
be anything that would hurt more. It just sounds. It
sounds excruciating. How do you survive that, like, how.
Speaker 2 (25:16):
Do you millions of dollars and going in there with
eight thousand dollars in my bank account to my name,
growing up in a very abusive household and environment and
at the racetrack being a survivor, living the hunger games,
being in nightclubs at thirteen years old, doing very terrible
things that I shouldn't be doing. That I would die
if my daughter was doing. I was raised like an animal,
(25:37):
So how did I do it? That's out because that's
what I you know, when I was broke and I
was going to the top. But am I proud of
my entire involvement at this time moment in time?
Speaker 1 (25:47):
No?
Speaker 3 (25:48):
No, But you know, well, it's like what you mentioned.
It can change people's lives. It can ruin people's lives,
it can end their careers. Like the consequences like, yeah,
that's the risk. People gamble, You get in and then look.
Speaker 2 (26:01):
What happens and can happen to people within It's no
different than what I'm saying. Within an episode or a season,
it's kill or be killed, and someone's always winning or losing.
Speaker 1 (26:12):
Within the entire.
Speaker 2 (26:13):
Sphere and game, it's also someone's always winning and losing.
Arianna is winning. That girl over Keel is fully losing.
This one's winning, the other one's fully losing, and it
affects their entire life. And both Arianna and Raquel have
parents that have to watch whatever.
Speaker 1 (26:31):
This rollercoaster is so.
Speaker 3 (26:32):
Anxiety hearing you talk about this. No wonder, I I mean, like.
Speaker 2 (26:35):
Ter never look back, don't worry, You're better for so
all right, So now we're at this guy's birthday. Now,
this poor guy's birthday. Now, I don't really care if
(26:57):
he's cheated or hasn't cheated.
Speaker 1 (26:59):
I don't know.
Speaker 2 (27:00):
They have four kids too, And I couldn't believe it.
I had never seen it. I couldn't believe it. And
in many cases I've been teamed Teresa, but not based
on watching the show, based on just like a mother
went to jail, like came back. She's honest about who
she is. She's a fighter, survivor. Like it's kind of
(27:21):
just like what I've what I think I know. I
haven't watched that much of Housewives. I've watched individual episodes
for the show, and just throughout my life, I've never
been dedicated. So that was pretty horrendous. Like that's as
bad as I've ever seen, And I don't care what
the girl did to her at this point, I don't care.
(27:44):
I can't believe she walked through someone's birthday party that
she was attending and spread a rumor like that's really bad.
That's that was disgusting.
Speaker 3 (27:52):
I was despicable. It's despicable. And I've been in that
situation where we've heard something that's going on in you know,
about a friend or a friend's partner and the cheating
room or whatever. There were twenty five other ways she
could have went about this. Then to go do that
behind her back at a night where they're celebrating, like
(28:12):
dropping that little rumor in every little at every corner
of that party that she could it was really That's
when I was just like, can this be real? Or
is this reality television? Because that was a terrible, terrible decision.
And then when they do confront one another about her,
when Jackie confronts Teresa and then uses the analogy that
it's like Jackie's spreading a rumor about Teresa's daughter doing
(28:35):
cocaine in the bathroom at school or something and telling
everybody but her, and then Teresa loses her and calls her.
Speaker 2 (28:42):
Yeah, it wasn't justified at all, Teresa, no argument. Yeah,
she was using an analogy saying it would be like
me saying yes, And it was smart of her to
say that, and yeah, of course yeah, and then for
her to get crazy that just that was nuts. But
the thing is to answer your question how it goes down.
And this is why this whole sphere of is it
(29:04):
real and what is reality is going to come crashing
down like a house of cards, because.
Speaker 1 (29:12):
What is it reality?
Speaker 2 (29:14):
That Teresa said to a producer and maybe a friend,
something that she heard from one person, Yeah, that's reality.
In her life, she's working on a reality show with
people she's friends with, not friends with, has alliances because
of television, and she has producers at her house all
the time. There's tape up on the walls because they
have cameras all the time. So she told a friend
and maybe a friend told the producer. Because it's always
(29:36):
killing or being killed. There's always if there's new meat,
new content, someone wants to bring it to the forefront.
No one can happen without bringing it to the forefront.
So no, that's not real, because in your real life
there are a lot of things you know and have heard,
and you don't bring it to the forefront.
Speaker 1 (29:49):
So a producer has.
Speaker 2 (29:51):
A meeting with her and then is in the car
with her and before she gets Mike to go into
a scene, and one hundred percent said, are you going
to mention what you heard from?
Speaker 1 (30:01):
Blah blah blah and a.
Speaker 2 (30:03):
Not that intelligent house, So I doesn't make choices for
themselves and goes in like a robot and delivers, you know,
messages that they're told from producers. So she went in
and she also was drunk. You're drinking a lot of alcohol,
which I also am starting to have a problem with.
Where's the line when producers will say this person cannot
be served anymore. We're in a workplace that's going to
come out too. Yes, everyone can drink, it's real life.
(30:26):
But the cameras add thirst they want. They make drinking
seem like a very good idea.
Speaker 1 (30:32):
I've been there.
Speaker 2 (30:33):
I don't I'm not a massive drinker, but you feel
like you're adrenaline so high, you're so stressed out. You
got cameras, and it's a good idea of pound drinks just.
Speaker 3 (30:43):
Games, so you know you're you could be killed at
any moment.
Speaker 2 (30:45):
You'reas you're stressed out and you're not drinking a lot
of water, and you drink more and no housewife will disagree,
okay none. No one's forcing you to drink alcohol like
they say. I've said that publicly about a Viva dresser.
No one's flying you alcohol. But who's holding back from
what's not correct in the workplace? So people get excited
on reality TV the more people get wasted. They get
(31:07):
excited if somebody goes off the wagon uses drugs as
a rumor, everything bad is good in the upside down.
So this so Teresa goes and thinks it's a good
idea to get this out into the forefront. And it
is good in reality TV because it's horrendous and it
means we can do twelve scenes coming off of that.
And I've been part of it and I've been the
(31:28):
ringleader in it, so just so you know, but it
was really not It was not great, and I'm a
hypocrite for saying it. But this is the episode that
I'm watching, and this is what I.
Speaker 3 (31:38):
Think, well, because everybody in I think with any kind
of reasonable judgment and morality when we're not on a
reality show, if one hears that about their friend's boyfriend husband, whatever,
What do you do? Two things? One you're considering do
I say anything at all? Because is it just a rumor?
(31:59):
Or are there seats that I can actually back this up?
And two you go to the friend. You don't go
to strangers in a party. You don't go call on somebody.
You don't send out a group text to everyone you
know other than your friend. You go to your friend.
Speaker 2 (32:14):
Yes, and yeah, I don't think it's her friend, it's
her showfriend, which also isn't real. It's a show structure
where you put with other people. So many times these
reality shows make people film and say you can't leave,
and it's called because how can you make someone film
their life? Like?
Speaker 1 (32:32):
That's not real?
Speaker 2 (32:33):
No one can come to my house today and put
a CA So you sign up for something that may
not be may not seem as intense as it's going
to be. And so and then Melissa said it best
when she said, can we just rewind? Like she wants
to rewind the occurrence the faces that everyone's making, Margaret,
everyone they're a guest. It's just it's it's outrageous that
(32:55):
it went on. It didn't make for an entertaining show.
I will say that it did make for an entertainer
show one hundred percent. And then Joe, Melissa's husband is like, yeah,
he's a good looking guy. Like as him being a
good looking guy and anything to do having an affair.
Speaker 3 (33:08):
That's hired me so much. I'm like, and is as
if she's not a good looking woman who deserves a
faithful husband.
Speaker 1 (33:15):
I don't understand that at all.
Speaker 2 (33:17):
And it's funny because sometimes Paul will say with me
about we're having a dispute, and he'll say to me,
it wasn't the message, it was the messaging. Like I
the messaging in this was so bad. I don't even
care what this man chooses to do with his personal life.
Speaker 1 (33:30):
It doesn't matter to me.
Speaker 2 (33:31):
It was this is so disrespectful at his birthday party,
and how embarrassing too to see him and her and
I love you and amazing and she's having the best
night of her life and she's in her interview saying
how amazing is And that's the number one thing that
people hate about an affair, not even the act, but
feeling like the fool.
Speaker 3 (33:49):
The fool, right, Yes, that's it. That's the worst, not
knowing the secrets, the deceit, the deceit because you feel
like such an idiot.
Speaker 1 (34:00):
And everybody else knew and it's taught.
Speaker 2 (34:01):
Yeah, like you're the village idiot totally.
Speaker 3 (34:06):
So been there last relationship.
Speaker 2 (34:09):
But wow, gods is like this was like design for you. Yeah,
you feel like the idiot fool.
Speaker 3 (34:14):
Oh my god, that's I mean, listen, there is such
a thing. I don't know if it's happily ever after.
I'm in the healthiest relationship right now that I've ever
been into my adult life. But my ex and I've
spoken about this on my podcast and he knows it.
And but he I was. He was a chronic serial
cheater and I learned. I learned the biggest life lesson
(34:39):
truly of my forty eight years through that relationship. And
it hurt and it sucked. And do you know how
many dms bephany I got from other women like, uh,
are you still with that guy because he's boning my friend?
I mean, like whole day long. It was devastating and hurtful,
and then you lose your s of self and then
(35:01):
you're walking on eggshells and then you're gas lits. So
many times you don't know what the truth is, what
the lies are. I was in that kind of relations
show that and so I get it. I know that
feeling of just betrayal. It's like the it's the worst, worst,
worst feeling, and then you and then you can only
blame that person and point the finger so long before
(35:23):
you have to point the finger at yourself and go,
why why am I staying? What is my part? How
have I contributed? Like? Why why did I allow that?
I knew the truth? You know, I allowed it one
too many times. So I had a lot of healing
to do from that. Yes, exactly, yeah, I had.
Speaker 2 (35:40):
There was a woman on New York Housewives and I
brought in to the show the fact, and I was
very upset to do it, and she wasn't a good
friend of mine, which I was, I admitted, but she
wasn't not on the show with me, and it was
sort of my responsibility, and I did bring it into
the show. There was a man that she was with
that she was about to marry, and I thought he
was terrible. So it's a little bit of a different circumstance.
(36:02):
And someone married for years, loves him and has four kids,
someone is about to marry someone who everyone knows is
a cheater and not a great guy. And I brought
it into the show, and I still it came back
like a boomerang, and I still felt bad about it
because she ended up marrying him, and she was one
of the women that doesn't want to know. And so
I realized there are women that don't want to know
(36:23):
and a woman who and I'm not saying the guy
did anything. I don't know a thing about this man,
but a woman of four children who's happy certainly doesn't
want to know.
Speaker 3 (36:33):
No, No, it's so funny you bring that up because,
oh god, I'm saying probably more than I should. But
when my last partner went on to get in another relationship,
people are like, oh, man, do you think she knows?
Like once you're you know, a leopard doesn't change his stripes,
Like is she just going to be the next person
dealing with this type of devastation or whatever? And my
(36:54):
yoga self is over here going, oh, people change, like
I really do. Do you wish everybody the best? I
wish I've win the best. It doesn't It doesn't behoove
me to wish people misery and pain, right, But I'm
like you know, people do change, maybe changed, maybe they're
you know, she's the perfect fit for him and good
for them, happily ever after whatever. But then it's also,
like I said, the same thing I said, also, maybe
(37:16):
maybe she's that type of woman who's like maybe they
haven't don't put a relationship right, I know, maybe like
she's like down with like three simes, or maybe she's
fulfilling that need that he never received with perhaps me
or other women. So you just don't know what's going
on within people.
Speaker 1 (37:31):
No, exactly.
Speaker 2 (37:32):
Most women have some sense of something and they choose
their own adventure. But that's the thing about back to
being on a reality show, and I'm with you that
I think it was entire I think she handled herself
with grace.
Speaker 1 (37:44):
I really do.
Speaker 2 (37:45):
She didn't go crazy, which I would have gone crazy,
and she was very civilized, and she was very embarrassed,
and she was honest about being embarrassed, and she was like,
please just retract this, Like she was really very dignified
in my opinion, in that scenario. And then Teresa acted
in a way as if she Teresa. Actually I never
(38:06):
knew the word gas lip back in the day, and
it's overused, but it's used properly here in that Teresa
was gaslighting her by projecting the fact that she had
just said something about Teresa's daughter like you're a piece
of shit, Like I mean, Jackie was entirely justified in
saying it would be like me hearing a rumor about
your daughter and saying and it really hit close to
(38:28):
home for Teresa.
Speaker 3 (38:29):
I also think she knew she was so in the
wrong already that it just gave her a reason to
eject herself from the whole thing. That's kind I think
she was just like, oh, okay, fine, I'm gonna get
so pissed about this and just leave. It appeared to
me like she that gave her some type of ammunition
to justify leaving the conversation.
Speaker 1 (38:47):
When was the ultimate turnaround? Yeah, so yeah.
Speaker 2 (38:51):
So it's funny because I've been having this fleeting thought
of like, should I be doing this show anymore? Because
I'm coming so heavily against this entire genre, not just
of this show, but other shows and just a genre
of mistreatment in a very new medium in the world
compared to television and film and all this. And then
(39:12):
I have conversations like this and I realized why I
am doing it, and I like this show because we're
utilizing it as a vehicle. We're not trashing bashing, like
we're actually understanding people that have been portrayed badly on
these shows. So I love doing it and you are
so perfect to do it with because you attribute it
to your own life, which I'm sure you never thought
you'd be doing.
Speaker 3 (39:33):
No. But at the end of the day, I mean,
I love women, I just do. That's why I enjoyed
watching this episode. Was reminded of how firstly funny a
lot of it was for me. I giggled a lot.
I like, you know, when you're talking back at an
episode or a TV show, you know it's a good one.
But like, I do have compassion for everybody, and I
(39:55):
just I felt compassion for Jackie in that situation, you know,
like talking shit at Teresa. Sorry, not sorry Teresa. You know,
but but I think you know, we all, you know,
it's kind of the beauty of life, Like we're all
just living our own journey, but it's nice to dip
into other people's journeys and it's it's fun.
Speaker 2 (40:16):
Well, you were amazing, I mean really amazing. You look beautiful.
I'm so happy you're in a beautiful relationship in a
beautiful place. And I'm happy you didn't do the Housewives
because it would somehow swallow you up and spit you out.
And the risk is too great at a place in
your life where you are now middle aged and you
are happy, the risk is too great. Look, you know
(40:37):
Kathy Hilton left. She did not need that. So I
think everything happened.
Speaker 1 (40:42):
For a reason. I appreciate you coming and talking.
Speaker 3 (40:44):
About it, Bethany. I really am a fan of yours
and I love what you put into the world and
you you you have a communication style I will never
ever have you just so like your opinion, Like you're
just so interesting and raw, and you don't think before
you speak, but you're so good at it, you know
what I mean, Like you don't need to and I
(41:05):
love what you do as an activist, and I love
that you are in the middle of this important conversation
during the strike and who knows what's going to happen
with all that, But like we need people like you,
and so you should come on my podcast sometime. I'd
love to talk with you about some of the these important,
deep issues.
Speaker 1 (41:25):
I think it would be great, perfect, wonderful.
Speaker 3 (41:27):
And how you've changed, Like I love hearing you say
about your own evolution and looking back and you know,
reflecting on what those shows meant to you, you know
at that time in your life, and how we all are,
you know, shedding different versions of ourselves and end up
you know anew and maybe that's you know where you
are right now. So I don't know, but I like
to get into it with you.
Speaker 1 (41:47):
Amazing love to thank you so much, Kat, thank you.
I have a great day.
Host
Bethenny Frankel
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