“Biotch!” (w/ Michelle Visage)

Recorded LIVE at Union Chapel in London, a true place of G*d, it’s the Proppa Fa**ot Tour! Matt & Bowen were bloody thrilled to share in the cultch across the pond, read British tabloids aloud, and get to the bottom of who Cheryl Cole is. Also, an interview with true queen and legend Michelle Visage! The Bodyguard album, Soul System, Seduction, musical theater, UK punk rock, old school hip hop, Madonna, Harlem ball culture, Leah Remini, Scientology, the domestic exclusivity of Percy Pigs, a troll bowl IDTSH on the English Rose and, finally, a specific takedown of the color green by it’s number one critic? This episode has it all! Hey, readers! We wouldn’t change a thing about you <3

Bonus episodes are available early for subscribers to Big Money Players Diamond on Apple Podcasts: https://apple.co/lasculturistas

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
Look may oh, I see you and look over there
is that the culture? Yes? Wow, loves culture.

Speaker 2 (00:14):
Hie love that away.

Speaker 1 (00:21):
Wow that was good.

Speaker 3 (00:24):
Hi everyone, Wow, Wow guys sound amazing?

Speaker 1 (00:36):
Did you guys sound amazing?

Speaker 3 (00:37):
I said, if we're gonna come to London, it has
to be where we're most comfortable, in a church, a
place of God. And what you just heard was the
song something kind of Ooh, my girls aloud. We were
toying with the idea of opening the show with us
singing it live, but then we said, what do we say?

(01:01):
We said, that's that song is not for God. It's
not for God. What so many more words than you
ever think it could possibly be, because really, in the
song something kind of ooh, really all you need is
something kind of and that's really.

Speaker 1 (01:16):
All you need. But there's so many words in it,
there's so much narrative. How does that like? There?

Speaker 2 (01:22):
What's a moro? Come baby? I won't even know your name?
List name is so good.

Speaker 3 (01:30):
This is for me listening to only that from my
flight from l X to London, only for Boeing to say,
I don't.

Speaker 1 (01:38):
Think we're gonna do it.

Speaker 3 (01:39):
It's not for Jesus. It's a lot it's a lot
of words.

Speaker 1 (01:47):
Should we sit? What's it? Okay? Wow? We we had some.

Speaker 3 (01:57):
We had some tequila and red bullback stee and I've
had three Guinnesses tonight.

Speaker 1 (02:03):
And you've got three Guinness.

Speaker 3 (02:06):
Well we should also say hi, I'm Matt Rogers and laws. Yeah,
and I'm friend of Matt Rogers Bowen Yang.

Speaker 1 (02:20):
Thank you for having us.

Speaker 3 (02:21):
And we want to thank you so much for joining
us on our tour, which today we decided is called
the proper faggot Tour.

Speaker 1 (02:33):
And because we're in a church, we mean cigarettes.

Speaker 3 (02:38):
I do want you to know also, the second this
show ends, you gotta run because this place is gonna
burn down.

Speaker 1 (02:46):
Brimstone, will Raine.

Speaker 3 (02:48):
It is not saved from the clearest story architecture majors
in here, anybody? No, Okay, Well, we're in a Gothic
Revival church and that you see this a wide transept
and a wide nave nave. Oh, you guys know, talk
dirty to me, talk dirty to me. We don't have
this in America. We don't have churches.

Speaker 1 (03:12):
You know. I went to a church once in America.

Speaker 3 (03:14):
Yeah, and it was for a funeral. Oh, and I
was sitting in the back with my mother because it
was like we didn't know the person, but we knew
the person. It was like you had to attend, but
certainly you weren't going to take space in the front
because that's for the people that are really heaving sob
and grieving, and we didn't care that much. So we
were sort of in the back. And it was to

(03:36):
the point of the mass where they're like, okay, now
everyone come up and receive communion.

Speaker 1 (03:40):
Where are my Catholics at?

Speaker 3 (03:44):
So at this point, I'm like twenty three, like two
years into being like fully gay to my mother three
two or three years, and I say to her, I'm like,
I don't think I can go up there and receive communion.
And she turned to me and said, yeah, if you
go up there, this place is going to burn to
the ground. And we laughed so hard, and one of

(04:09):
the heaving, sobbing, grieving women turned around in the front
and goes, wow. And we felt bad and sat right
in our seat and did not receive communion on the day.

Speaker 1 (04:28):
That's okay, you didn't get you didn't get.

Speaker 3 (04:30):
The body, but no, and I was always addicted to
the taste. Right, you didn't did you spend a lot
of time in a Catholic.

Speaker 1 (04:36):
Jo was not Catholic, So you never received the body
of Christ. I never orally did not receive. I might
have gotten.

Speaker 4 (04:45):
I might have gotten like the cuticle, you know. I
we got a thin wafer one day and it was
like so delicate that I was like, Christ is skinny?

Speaker 3 (04:53):
Christ is Christ is actually acceptable in the zone?

Speaker 1 (04:58):
Diet the zone? What's the zone? Do do people know
what the zone? Wait?

Speaker 3 (05:06):
The zone is truly like a nineties diet fat that
Jennifer Aniston was like the face of and the whole
thing was like no carbs, never a carb.

Speaker 1 (05:16):
Never. If you even think about a carb, you're not
loving Joanniston. Then you're not going like her. No, you're
not going to her.

Speaker 5 (05:22):
No.

Speaker 3 (05:22):
I feel like Christ, would Jesus Christ have gone on
New Zempic if he were alive today. I think Jesus
Christ would have turned Ozembic into yes Manjaro. Well, here's
the thing. They're always like, you know, Jesus is coming back.
He's coming back. First of all, it's like TikTok, bitch.

(05:43):
It can't get much worse than.

Speaker 1 (05:45):
It is right now. Jesus is gonna come back. It
needs to be now.

Speaker 3 (05:48):
But also if Jesus did come back, first of all,
he'd find out about TikTok. He'd be a huge influencer,
especially with those aps. He'd be so annoying Jesus, he'd.

Speaker 1 (06:00):
Show off his scars, okay, and.

Speaker 3 (06:06):
We'd all be horny about it, but mad like Logan Paul.
Jesus would be Logan Paul. Are we horny bit mad
for Logan Paul? If you're a horny for Logan Paul,
make noise. Second, Road just rolled her eyes so aggressively,

(06:27):
just so you know, I can see you.

Speaker 1 (06:33):
Well.

Speaker 3 (06:33):
In the words of Taylor Swift, I can see you,
I can see you well.

Speaker 1 (06:39):
It's mid That's okay, that's okay. That was good. By
the way. First of all, give it up for Olga
Coke everybody. Yeah, you know.

Speaker 4 (06:53):
What she was talking about her friends eating ass. I
was like, see, yeah, I would go on.

Speaker 1 (06:58):
It was embic.

Speaker 4 (06:58):
But I still want to eat ass, you know what
I mean. I don't want to I don't want to
lose my appetite.

Speaker 3 (07:07):
Listen, current events are happening as we speak, and we think,
we think the best thing about London is English tabloid culture.
We think it's really healthy the way you guys do things.

Speaker 4 (07:25):
Everyone's making good, noble money off of this.

Speaker 3 (07:30):
So Bowen said he was gonna go pick up some
tabloids and then we'd sort of flipped through and see
just how much you, page by page are ruining these
people's lives and degrading them beyond belief in a way.

Speaker 1 (07:44):
That is truly unfathomable.

Speaker 3 (07:46):
So Megan Markle is on the cover of this, right, yes,
and all we've well, well, it sounds like we've got
some royalists in the crowd.

Speaker 1 (07:56):
Was this mattering of applause? Yeah? Who here?

Speaker 3 (07:58):
What describe themselves as a royal list? Very anti Megan Markle?

Speaker 4 (08:04):
Yeah, okay, no, wait, you're being shy now, who is it?

Speaker 1 (08:11):
Did you mean that we need to hear this? Lost?
Coaches about different perspectives.

Speaker 3 (08:18):
Bowen is a centrist, leans more conservative. I'm very liberal.
So it's about different views. That's why they call it
the view Who hates Megan Markle and thinks she's calculated?

Speaker 1 (08:35):
Who said that? I see I see them? Who is it?
Go get up here, come on, get up, get up,
get up, get up, get up, get up, get up.

Speaker 2 (08:48):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (08:48):
Suddenly, yeah, suddenly you want to hide.

Speaker 3 (08:51):
You're like these writers, well.

Speaker 1 (08:57):
Mean theirs Cheryl speaking of girls aloud?

Speaker 3 (09:02):
This is there's Cheryl's being reported on, Megan's being reported on.
I told I kind of gave Matt the condensed, abridged
version of the Holly and Phil of it all.

Speaker 1 (09:15):
I received none of it. Did you don't love that?

Speaker 4 (09:19):
He?

Speaker 1 (09:19):
So he had an affair with like a twink? Is
that what happens?

Speaker 3 (09:24):
So I'm so okay. So there're two morning show co hosts.
He is an affair with a twink that works with
the show. She's upset because they have chemistry.

Speaker 1 (09:33):
Someone's shaking her hat? What is that wrong? That was wrong?
What happened?

Speaker 3 (09:40):
Then?

Speaker 1 (09:42):
Yes? Oh is it gonna mood? We'll bring it up.
What what? What is it?

Speaker 3 (09:50):
And then I want to talk to her friend asked
the truth of the story, and we'll make humor out
of it.

Speaker 1 (10:01):
He potentially groomed. He gave him a bang.

Speaker 3 (10:06):
M literally figuratively hair wise. What about our friend back there?
I saw something?

Speaker 1 (10:13):
Yes, you who?

Speaker 3 (10:18):
She pretended she didn't know. She's even worse than him. Oh,
she should be in jail. She pretended she didn't know.

Speaker 1 (10:32):
Oh, she must be.

Speaker 3 (10:34):
Banished to askaband with her, to askaband with her with
all making her incredibly English reference. Yeah, only only at
a niche English reference. Askaman, you know what's international? What
in sync is back?

Speaker 1 (10:52):
Yeah? Who here? Thinks Justin Timberlake like he drinks a lot.

Speaker 4 (11:04):
They I'm sorry, I'm sorry, and I'm gonna go on
the record. Literally we're recording this for the podcast. Don't
worry people at home home.

Speaker 3 (11:11):
Is in the States. We're sorry, I'm gonna go on
the record. They all look bad, they all look really bad.
I'm sorry. That's bringing the mood down. Is we talk
about men? Aging is talking about these men? Uh that
groomer needs to get over here and deal with them,
give them some real I see I see one two

(11:32):
thirty four five men in need of a good groomman,
did you see?

Speaker 1 (11:40):
I was so excited they came back on the VMA.

Speaker 3 (11:43):
Say like we're back haha, and then it was like
it's a song for trolls. Justin Timberlake has pivoted from
international pop star to trolls, which makes me think there's
I think trolls is like the new Scientology or something

(12:04):
like they have these people like imprisoned.

Speaker 4 (12:07):
It's not good in a contract that makes them put
out troll songs.

Speaker 3 (12:13):
Look at this, This says Harry, I want my old
life back.

Speaker 1 (12:18):
Who thinks Harry wants his old life back? Yeah? No, No, that.

Speaker 3 (12:23):
Doesn't look fun at all. You're sitting in a big castle.
Where are the outlets?

Speaker 1 (12:27):
Here's my thing? Yeah, go go.

Speaker 3 (12:34):
You see photos and videos of like the castle, even
bal Moral, there's no outlets there.

Speaker 1 (12:40):
Like for what about like plugging your iPhone?

Speaker 3 (12:42):
You would have to search forty five minutes to even
find somewhere to plug your iPhone fifteen pro Hey, does
anyone hear work and set deck at the Crown because
literally we need to see some outlets at Balmoral.

Speaker 1 (12:57):
Okay, hold on, hold on.

Speaker 3 (13:01):
I want to read this article because I was reading
it today in the morning while I was waiting, I
was literally waiting for Matt to land here. It says,
let's let's let's just try out our boone wants to
read these articles in our British accents.

Speaker 1 (13:15):
And then.

Speaker 3 (13:17):
I want to do I want to do my best rp. Okay,
my best received pronunciation.

Speaker 1 (13:23):
That's what is that.

Speaker 4 (13:24):
It's standard in English. It's like BBC English, you know.

Speaker 3 (13:28):
So the difference between him and me is he knows
the differences and all my British accents.

Speaker 1 (13:35):
Are yeah, yeah yeah, do it do something now?

Speaker 3 (13:43):
Would you like to hear me read about Britney Spears
and my bad adel? Yeah, yeah, yeah, Brittany, Sam's not
getting on a.

Speaker 1 (13:54):
Face splay last month.

Speaker 3 (13:56):
Have to one year marriage and it hasn't taken long
for things to get oklay between Britney Spears and a
restrained husband Sam asgry.

Speaker 1 (14:04):
It's sort of getting up. He also allegedly.

Speaker 3 (14:14):
Waived and he claims to Britney's music rights and isn't
listed on the deeds of their shared home in California.

Speaker 1 (14:24):
You're joking. That's my huge joke.

Speaker 4 (14:26):
You're joking. That's my favorite British ism. You joke, you're joking.
And the second favorite one is it's a bit ship ship.
It's really good.

Speaker 3 (14:37):
It's a bit ship in it, bit ship in it. Okay,
mine's not gonna be to do it.

Speaker 1 (14:41):
This is this is very here we go.

Speaker 3 (14:44):
While Megan's focused on the future, he's stuck in regret
over the past.

Speaker 1 (14:50):
You're copying me. I'm not. You're doing Robin Lee.

Speaker 4 (14:54):
I pretend I'm on the BBC World service. I'm pretending
I'm doing BBC News.

Speaker 3 (15:00):
He's been looking gloom of late, failing to even raise
a smile.

Speaker 1 (15:06):
That Beyonce's l a concert. That's all I got.

Speaker 3 (15:14):
Wait, can I say something? I hate you guys. There's
a photo of this. There's something in here called Torso
of the Week guys, and it's like, ye, okay, okay,
I mean these gays don't go to Dalston Superstore.

Speaker 1 (15:34):
They're they're.

Speaker 3 (15:37):
They're local jokes. Local is gonna get them every time.

Speaker 1 (15:41):
I know.

Speaker 3 (15:42):
This is a segment that we like to call explain
Cheryl call to us.

Speaker 1 (15:51):
She now goes by the mononym of Cheryl.

Speaker 3 (15:54):
Well that's something. I okay, who here things expert. They're
the biggest expert in the room at Cheryl Cole. You yes, yes,
come up, Come on up, come on up?

Speaker 1 (16:27):
No, No, you know enough here here? What's your name?
All right?

Speaker 3 (16:31):
Everyone give it up for tola ta see. So one
thing about America is we don't know about Cheryl Cole
at all. And then here in the UK, Cheryl Cole
is we're told one of the biggest stars here.

Speaker 1 (16:48):
Would you agree? Huge?

Speaker 5 (16:51):
It's been up and down, but I think, yeah, we're.

Speaker 1 (16:55):
Can you describe the topography of the ups and downs?
So how did Cheryl Cole start out?

Speaker 5 (17:00):
I believe it was girls allowed, if anyone was right, huge,
huge girl group here in the UK.

Speaker 1 (17:08):
Obviously we do know that, yes, yes, and so the
girls allowed?

Speaker 3 (17:14):
Is that supposed to be like a riff on, like
like no girls allowed? And then because it's a l
O U D right, so it's more girls shouting.

Speaker 2 (17:23):
Indeed, because women before that women.

Speaker 3 (17:28):
Couldn't couldn't shout yeah, yeah, and now.

Speaker 1 (17:35):
They can now.

Speaker 3 (17:37):
Would you say that as a result of girls allowed,
that women felt empowered to raise their voice?

Speaker 2 (17:42):
I would say so.

Speaker 6 (17:43):
I think the response seems to yeah, because you know,
would you say, Tyler, there was a vacuum of women
shouting the post Spice girl's landscape.

Speaker 5 (17:54):
I think before that the only woman to shout was
Margaret Thatcher and.

Speaker 1 (17:59):
We love her, love Queen, May she rest? May she well?
You know? Can you be honest?

Speaker 3 (18:07):
The only reason Matt Rodgers and I know about something
kind of oo by Girls Aloud is because Hue the
seminal duo on respector X Factor two Shoes. Did anyone
else watch the season of X Factor with sher Lloyd
and One Direction. Yeah, they were, they were their season

(18:31):
Wow shoes.

Speaker 2 (18:32):
You're familiar with Sharon and One Direction?

Speaker 1 (18:35):
Yes? Yes? What's your Lloyd up to?

Speaker 3 (18:37):
What is.

Speaker 2 (18:39):
Congrats to show?

Speaker 1 (18:42):
Wow? What's amazing?

Speaker 2 (18:45):
I still follow her on Facebook?

Speaker 1 (18:47):
Oh great, lovely? Okay, so so no, wait, taller, you're
on Facebook with share? Are you a mother yourself?

Speaker 3 (18:54):
No? No, I'm.

Speaker 2 (18:57):
To my best friend.

Speaker 1 (18:58):
Hot.

Speaker 3 (18:59):
I am like your your your heart's mother, but not
literally not yes, yes, yes I am a child but
oh like us.

Speaker 1 (19:07):
Okay.

Speaker 3 (19:07):
So, just to get back to the trajectory of the
entire career of Cheryl Cole, she starts out on Girls Allowed,
and would you say she was sort of the breakout star,
sort of the Justin of Girls Allowed.

Speaker 5 (19:19):
I think it was a little more even like I
could barely name the other four.

Speaker 3 (19:23):
Right right, that's okay, no, stop stop that, stop stop
that by now.

Speaker 2 (19:31):
Very young labor before my apparently no.

Speaker 1 (19:33):
No, no, there's some Nadine stands.

Speaker 3 (19:36):
Here and and I'm literally making up that that's one
of their names, because only one of these people crossed
over into the US lexicon, and that was Ryl.

Speaker 1 (19:48):
This is true. She has many last names she's had
over time, so I think.

Speaker 5 (19:52):
She's back to Tweety because a big part of her
story that she was married to famous English footballer As Cole,
who played for my club, Chelsea.

Speaker 2 (20:03):
I say, with great shame, Hey, hey.

Speaker 3 (20:06):
Hey, the peanut gallery is restricted.

Speaker 1 (20:12):
So she's Cheryl Tweety in the beginning as a girl's
allowed member.

Speaker 3 (20:17):
She meets this footballer that's probably huge for the tabloids,
these motherfuckers. And then what happens she becomes Ryl Colin
sort of passion bexes it.

Speaker 5 (20:28):
Up exactly, hanging out with the Coleen Rooneys of the world,
Victoria Beckham's I think there was tension between her and Victoria.

Speaker 1 (20:37):
Well yeah, if.

Speaker 5 (20:38):
I recall I was about eight at the time, it's
a brag, but it trickled down.

Speaker 3 (20:47):
It trickled down. So you support thatcher, So you support thatcher.
Okay that's basically what you just said. Huge fan of Reagan, Yes, yes,
all right, So Cheryl Cole for a while, it doesn't
work out with the footballer, because when does it ever
work out with the footballer?

Speaker 1 (21:05):
Am I right? So so then she becomes what.

Speaker 5 (21:10):
Then for a while she sort of disappeared. I'd say
she did. She did obviously continue.

Speaker 1 (21:15):
Excuse me.

Speaker 2 (21:18):
Maybe she was around.

Speaker 1 (21:22):
When does she become the pop star Cheryl?

Speaker 2 (21:27):
She did that? She did fight for this love?

Speaker 5 (21:30):
Yeah, which, yeah, that was huge.

Speaker 2 (21:34):
I was in secondary school at the time.

Speaker 3 (21:36):
Okay, that's you gotta fa fa fve.

Speaker 1 (21:41):
Yeah, it's kind of a bop.

Speaker 2 (21:43):
I would say, it's fantastic. Yeah, seminal work.

Speaker 1 (21:46):
Seminal work.

Speaker 4 (21:47):
Now, when did Cheryl Hole the rue Paul's drag Race
the UK Sees series one Queen step on the scene,
Cheryl Hole and her whole? Her name is a play
on Cheryl Cole, which is now an outdated moniker.

Speaker 1 (22:01):
When did Cheryl Hall enter the lexicon for you?

Speaker 2 (22:03):
I don't know in relation to Cheryl Cole.

Speaker 5 (22:07):
I don't know the story behind why she opted for that.

Speaker 1 (22:11):
Yes, would you agree that Cole rhymes with Hole? I worked? Yes,
thank you? You're right? Okay, Can I just ask just
a couple more questions?

Speaker 3 (22:26):
When does Fernandez versini become a thing?

Speaker 1 (22:32):
I can't answer that, you said, because can I tell
you something?

Speaker 3 (22:35):
You raised your hand and you said you were an
authority on Cheryl Cole? Was the lull?

Speaker 1 (22:43):
That was?

Speaker 2 (22:43):
So I wasn't keeping up with it quite as crazy.

Speaker 3 (22:46):
Do you know about her becoming pregnant with Liam Payne's child, Bear?
His name is Bear Pain. If I'm lucky, I'm getting
some Bare Pain tonight.

Speaker 1 (23:03):
Okay. Yeah.

Speaker 3 (23:09):
Do we believe that that child is happy in a
private school somewhere?

Speaker 1 (23:14):
Yeah? I hope so too.

Speaker 3 (23:16):
What do you think the relationship is currently between Cheryl
whatever the fuck she's going by.

Speaker 1 (23:21):
And Liam Pain?

Speaker 2 (23:24):
I assume that co parenting.

Speaker 3 (23:34):
And I'm gonna ask you first, and then I'm gonna
ask the crowd, because this is also going to become
our opinion.

Speaker 1 (23:39):
It's your opinion of Cheryl Cole. Tweety Vernanda's Varsini.

Speaker 3 (23:43):
Tweety pain, tweety positive or negative?

Speaker 1 (23:48):
Okay? Great? And what about everybody else?

Speaker 3 (23:55):
Well, welcome, Cheryl gone.

Speaker 1 (23:59):
Just kidding, We're all the same page. Everyone. Give it
up for Tallow.

Speaker 3 (24:05):
You did amazing, You did amazing, You did amazing. Now
you sit there there, give it up for everybody, everybody,
and give it up for Sheriff Cole wherever she is.

(24:34):
Now here's something. Here's something you may notice. We left
the chair empty over here, and that was sort of
me telling you that we.

Speaker 1 (24:44):
Did get the signal. We did get the signal. We
got the signal.

Speaker 3 (24:47):
I'm my my sort of field division is kind of limited.
I'm not able to see that you do not let
me tell you something about when you have a lot
of talent, but you do not have eyes in.

Speaker 1 (24:57):
The back of your head.

Speaker 3 (24:59):
And and it was on me only to get the signal.
Can I tell you something what? I wouldn't change a
thing about me? No, I would.

Speaker 1 (25:08):
I wouldn't want that. It's taken you a long.

Speaker 3 (25:11):
Time, yeah, to be able to say that true. I
wouldn't change a thing about you. My sister, Hey, who
is here with their best friend? That's so, if you're
here with your best friend, I want you to stand up,
and I want you to look at them. I want
you to look them in the face and say, baby,
I wouldn't change a thing about you, And I want

(25:32):
you to mean it. Maybe I wouldn't change I wouldn't
change a thing about you. Can everyone just connect? Can
everyone just connect for a second?

Speaker 1 (25:40):
Yeah? Do it?

Speaker 3 (25:42):
Are you guys meaning it? I hope you mean it. Oh,
there's a lot of love in the room.

Speaker 1 (25:47):
I wouldn't change I would.

Speaker 3 (25:52):
Now, And everyone sit down, Everyone sit because there there
there is that, there is there is royalty in the room.
There is true royalty in the room. You know, your
nation has kind of stolen.

Speaker 1 (26:06):
Her from us.

Speaker 3 (26:07):
Yeah, and she's kind of transcended, like xpat because she
kind of splits her time, yeah, between the States and
the Kingdom. Well, she goes internationally wherever she needs to go.
Oh yeah, you know her taxes are hell oh god,
I want to ask her about her taxes. Oh, she's

(26:29):
getting like a fucking form from because I think that's
what everyone wants to hear about, is how.

Speaker 1 (26:33):
The fuck does her account?

Speaker 4 (26:35):
Oh yeah, so like you have to file an Australian
tax Like, you get an Australian paycheck, you get a
British paycheck exactly, you get like it's too much.

Speaker 3 (26:45):
Yeah, on top of being a noted singer, actress, reality
television personality, let's just face it, one of the greatest
judges in reality television history. We are so honored that
she made the time to come here. This was a

(27:06):
huge ass. I say from the beginning, one of the
dream guests of this podcast, and it goes way back
and tonight's the night.

Speaker 1 (27:14):
Oh wow, everyone please welcome to the stage show.

Speaker 2 (27:29):
Wow, people like you is amazing.

Speaker 7 (27:34):
What a great crowd. You guys are an amazing crowd.

Speaker 1 (27:37):
Yeah, shut up.

Speaker 2 (27:39):
I just got off the radio.

Speaker 1 (27:41):
I was gonna say, you bolted straight here.

Speaker 2 (27:43):
So I ran.

Speaker 7 (27:45):
I'm so exhausting. These and those Oh my god, they're
not that high. These are kind of grandma that's.

Speaker 3 (27:51):
All right, Yeah, grandma ware is that I got jog?
We were talking about today on the radio.

Speaker 1 (27:57):
Yeah, what happened?

Speaker 2 (27:58):
It was great. I have the best show on the radio.

Speaker 7 (28:01):
I'm just I'm just gonna say this. If you haven't listened,
it's Friday night, seven to night. It's fabulous Fridays. And
it's all the music that I get to pick.

Speaker 3 (28:10):
Is it given me a lot of nineties dance, like seventies, eighties,
nineties dance.

Speaker 7 (28:16):
But in America on the radio, you don't get to
pick your music. The boss tells you what you're playing,
and you push the button and you talk in between.

Speaker 2 (28:24):
Here on Radio two, they get to let me pick
my music.

Speaker 3 (28:28):
Freedom to make a change. Oh my god. So we're
just talking out here, you being all over the world.
What the hell are your Texas like? And how does
your accountant do it?

Speaker 2 (28:45):
The accountant does do it?

Speaker 1 (28:48):
Goodbye?

Speaker 2 (28:48):
The account is my husband.

Speaker 7 (28:50):
Oh, he's really good with math or maths. He does
the math and I just work and I keep working.
So it is you do have to be responsible for
this country and New Zealand and America.

Speaker 2 (29:07):
So basically I eat Ramen noodles, but I work a lot.

Speaker 1 (29:10):
So there you go. So we're on top of it.

Speaker 4 (29:13):
Yeah, but you know there's something and I hope to
one day really work in a country where the queen's
face is on the money. You know what I mean,
don't make any sense? Yeah, because I used to be
a Commonwealth baby. I was going from Australia to Canada
and then you know, the States, The States are the States.

Speaker 2 (29:31):
Yeah, is it our thing to.

Speaker 1 (29:33):
Default to like hating American when I come here? I do? Yeah.

Speaker 7 (29:38):
I remember I was talking about it recently somewhere on
something and somebody got really offended because I said that
it's the countryside is so spectacular here, it is breathtaking,
and I said, I don't really feel like we have.

Speaker 2 (29:52):
That in America. Well, I got read the Riot Act,
like have.

Speaker 7 (29:56):
You ever been out state New York? And I was like, yeah, bitch,
that's the problem. Have you ever been to Surrey?

Speaker 3 (30:03):
I don't think so okay, so how long have you
been here on this trip to the UK.

Speaker 1 (30:08):
And also I want to know, like if you had yours?

Speaker 2 (30:12):
Oh my god, you have Mary Jane's.

Speaker 1 (30:14):
I do Mary Jane. He's always got something on his feet.

Speaker 2 (30:18):
So cute.

Speaker 1 (30:19):
You know what the new thing is?

Speaker 4 (30:20):
I think what the new thing is in Coco Schnell,
like take one thing off before you leave the house.

Speaker 1 (30:24):
It's put one thing on that's slightly wrong.

Speaker 2 (30:27):
I'm down, you know, yeah, slightly fucked up.

Speaker 7 (30:31):
Yeah, like my pinky, what happened happened an unfortunate fisting accident.

Speaker 2 (30:37):
No, actually I was. You know here, we.

Speaker 7 (30:41):
Don't do this in the States. You can park anyway
you want on the road. So if you're going this way,
do do do do do, And there's a spot that
way you can just go heaven, right, Except for the
fact that my door was here and the car was
coming this way. It was trying to be nice and
open the door real quick and get out, and the
entire sure.

Speaker 2 (31:02):
No, the entire friggin nail gone. It was a bloodbath.

Speaker 1 (31:13):
Oh I mean.

Speaker 2 (31:15):
So then I went on my Instagram and I'm like.

Speaker 7 (31:18):
I'm cutting oh my nail because I can't take it anymore. Also,
every thirteen year old girl has like nails now, so
I don't feel special anymore. So I thought, well, I
want lesbian hands, you want hands, I'm gonna cut.

Speaker 3 (31:30):
But these are a feet of engineering though, I mean,
can you show this is I'm study.

Speaker 2 (31:36):
Thank you, thank you? And I told Rue and Ruth said, well,
it really is. End of days.

Speaker 3 (31:42):
That's not even a lost fingernail. That's like an insurance claim.
I know. That's like, I know, I feel like instroduction
days you had the naturally grown full nail. I'm sorry,
the induction days you had the naturally grown full nail.

Speaker 7 (31:59):
Those were my no, yes, wow, six inches. We've all
been to six inches. Yeah, well I hope, yeah, we
all have those stories. So I definitely grew them myself
for all that time.

Speaker 2 (32:13):
And on the cover of the Soul System record, those were.

Speaker 4 (32:15):
My yeaessm, wait a minute, Matt, and I had a
really gross question.

Speaker 1 (32:20):
I have a I have a sort of ghost question.

Speaker 3 (32:22):
So you're on the Bodyguard soundtrack that is the biggest
soundtrack of all time. Correct, So let's the biggest film
time track of all time.

Speaker 1 (32:29):
Soul System give it up for Soul system.

Speaker 7 (32:32):
Track nine Yes track track You Are Good, the only
non Whitney song that made it into the movie.

Speaker 1 (32:38):
Wowow. So how often do the check come in?

Speaker 7 (32:44):
Okay, I am glad you asked ye because I am
no longer in the lawsuit.

Speaker 2 (32:49):
Oh, the checks came.

Speaker 7 (32:54):
This is full disclosure. My parents were losing their house
and my first paycheck came.

Speaker 2 (32:59):
I've ever seen.

Speaker 7 (33:00):
It wasn't millions, So don't worry because I it was
a remake of the Bill withersong. So guess who got
most of the money estate Yeah, yeah, and then it
was produced by C and C Music Factory, which we
all know the history of that them. So I did well,
but I didn't make millions. But the first check came in.
So I bought my mom and dad house.

Speaker 1 (33:19):
Oh wow, I mean that's true.

Speaker 7 (33:23):
They were losing their house, so I bought them a house,
and then I bought them a car, and I brought
my brother, my brother a car. Then after like two years,
the lawyer says, oh, your checks are going to get
smaller and smaller, and I was like, okay, that makes sense,
because you know, you sell less records and I don't
know how it works. I'm twenty three years old. I
have no idea. So come to find out years later,

(33:43):
that lawyer calls me, you know, twenty thirty years later
and says, oh, they told me to stop paying you.
What So I was only paid on seventeen million records
when forty five were sold.

Speaker 1 (33:53):
Wow, that's a third. That's a third of the record.

Speaker 2 (33:56):
So I tried to do math.

Speaker 1 (33:58):
I know, well done by it.

Speaker 7 (34:01):
There's a statute of limitations X amount of years go by.
I'm fighting, fighting, and I can't do anything because I missed,
because I missed the date.

Speaker 1 (34:09):
So and this is why we got right.

Speaker 2 (34:12):
This is it, This is it.

Speaker 3 (34:15):
Unbelievable though, So you're when you're told, like, as a
member of Seduction, you're going to be on the Bodyguard soundtrack.

Speaker 2 (34:22):
That was Sol System, this is the next group.

Speaker 7 (34:25):
Oh yeah, after production made zero money, I then signed
with them again.

Speaker 3 (34:29):
So so you're told you're going to be on the
Bodyguard soundtrack? Yes, And are you thinking that's going to
be the biggest thing of all time because it's.

Speaker 1 (34:38):
Whitney Houston, Kevin Cosner or were you assuming that was
going to be? Well?

Speaker 7 (34:42):
I assumed that I was going to be Madonna two
point zero from the beginning and that didn't happen, so
I thought this next time, it was a better deal.
I got to write the rap that I did on
the Bodyguard, so Clive Davis himself signed me. They brought
me in for the meeting. Clive was like, you are
a pop staw and I was like, you're right, sir.

Speaker 1 (35:01):
Yeah, So I thought this was.

Speaker 2 (35:02):
Gonna be my moment.

Speaker 7 (35:04):
And I did actually record most of an album that
never got delivered so as a Lord as Soul Assistant
featuring Michelle Vissage. Yeah, so it got never got delivered
on time, so they axed us.

Speaker 2 (35:15):
They dropped us.

Speaker 7 (35:16):
But when Clive said I'm gonna put that song on
the Bodyguard soundtrack, it was.

Speaker 2 (35:20):
Like, we don't know. I just hear Whitney Houston.

Speaker 1 (35:23):
That's all I get.

Speaker 7 (35:24):
You don't know, really it's going to be in a movie.
That's a big deal. But you know, lots of songs
go in movies. Every movie has songs, but not every.

Speaker 2 (35:31):
Movie hits the way that did.

Speaker 7 (35:33):
Yeah, so that was just an honor to be able
to be on anything near Whitney Houston.

Speaker 1 (35:38):
Yeah, you know, so you ever get to meet her
and mix with her at that time, I did.

Speaker 2 (35:42):
I got to interview her.

Speaker 7 (35:43):
I did morning radio for a very long time for
seventeen years, and I got to thank Whitney in person
for for basically buying my parents.

Speaker 2 (35:54):
But really changing my life in that way. And she
was like, yeah, Jersey woo and I was like.

Speaker 1 (35:59):
Oh right, yeah, that's two Jersey girls. That's beautiful.

Speaker 4 (36:04):
The bad bad Wait a minute, Okay, so Michelle and
I think, well, I suggested this because you use this
in conversation.

Speaker 3 (36:13):
I think it's time for us to bring Oh I
heard about this. It's time for us as a culture
to bring. You know, you're not going to say we're
going to bring bacha be.

Speaker 7 (36:25):
Okay, yeah, but this this is how what happened. We
were texting yes, and you know, can't be traced Americans.
Americans don't WhatsApp. You know this, right, Americans? I message
and every English person, a British person is like, why

(36:45):
what is that thing you're doing?

Speaker 2 (36:47):
That's an I message?

Speaker 7 (36:48):
So we were voice memoing back and forth and I said,
I'm gonna come see you beach.

Speaker 2 (36:53):
And I was like, g I did us.

Speaker 7 (37:00):
Yeah, you just said and I'm so ready for the
return of being ready.

Speaker 1 (37:05):
I'm ready. Why did we get rid of it?

Speaker 2 (37:06):
I don't know.

Speaker 3 (37:07):
I mean he told me about it. I didn't even
have to question it. I was like, yeah, for sure,
back in the lexicon. Why I did it go away?

Speaker 1 (37:15):
I mean, the title of this EPP is Beyonce.

Speaker 3 (37:18):
You that's title of that beat with Michelle visage from
I Love.

Speaker 2 (37:23):
This episode is Islington beyon.

Speaker 3 (37:29):
I feel like we threw the baby out with the
bathwater when we all decided, you know, bitch is a
hard bad word. It's very you know, and I think
we've come back around on bitch as being all purpose.

Speaker 1 (37:38):
Yeah.

Speaker 3 (37:38):
And I think BA can have that same sort of
like Swiss army quality to it where.

Speaker 2 (37:44):
Yes, yeah, claiming my beach Beyonce.

Speaker 3 (37:47):
Is very like metrosexual, where it's like you're saying something
but only ninety percent of the way.

Speaker 1 (37:53):
Yeah.

Speaker 3 (37:53):
And then when they said bitch, it was like when
metro sexuals were like, yeah, we're gay, you.

Speaker 1 (37:58):
Know what I mean?

Speaker 3 (38:00):
And now I want to bring back metro second Yeah, okay, okay,
I'm going back.

Speaker 2 (38:05):
I'm in what's next? Zeek Cavalci, I was very American? Sorry, wait,
what was it? Am I too old? No? No, No,
I think I just misheard Zekavacci's. Do you remember them.

Speaker 7 (38:19):
They were a type of pant that were very tight here,
and the straight boys, the guidos, the very It's how
you knew York. Those kind of guys would wear them,
and they were tight here, and then they'd kind of
balloon out and then they go.

Speaker 2 (38:33):
Tight at the ankles, and you'd wear them with kipezios.

Speaker 3 (38:35):
Oh oh yeah, yeah, so tight at the waist, balloon
out and they come thank you, Yeah, I gotcha.

Speaker 7 (38:42):
That was the hottest guy very International mail catalog. Hello,
I'm going back to the late eighties.

Speaker 1 (38:47):
Yle it.

Speaker 2 (38:47):
You'll be very happy.

Speaker 1 (38:48):
He'll be back any second.

Speaker 2 (38:50):
The gayest men you've ever seen. And I had the
hots for all of them.

Speaker 3 (38:54):
Well yeah, Now did you in your adolescence did you?
Were you sort of attracted to a fleet of gay men. Yes,
and so your gaitar wasn't there, but you were. You
knew I want to be a.

Speaker 1 (39:08):
Part of it.

Speaker 7 (39:09):
I liked effeminine men, I see, yeah. I liked a
fancy boy.

Speaker 1 (39:13):
Yeah, and.

Speaker 7 (39:16):
Who liked hair gel. I don't know a guyliner. It
was like the new wave of romantic era. And I
would have sex with them. You would and then they
would go, Okay, I have something to tell you.

Speaker 1 (39:32):
Yeah.

Speaker 7 (39:33):
So it was that not every time, but if you know,
I helped them, I help them come out.

Speaker 2 (39:37):
Oh my god, you're welcome.

Speaker 3 (39:39):
And it would be sixss it would yeah please, yes,
I mean that's what I'm here to do.

Speaker 2 (39:46):
That's what I'm here too. I was a slag and
a half. Yeah, I don't really honestly.

Speaker 7 (39:50):
That's people ask me how I what's the the secret
the key to I've been married for twenty six years
to this, to the same man.

Speaker 2 (39:58):
I was a penis to.

Speaker 7 (40:00):
The same penis, and they said, what's the secret? I
was like, well, I had many years of slaggotry.

Speaker 3 (40:04):
Yeah, you're done, you're retired.

Speaker 1 (40:08):
Yes, I'm done. Yeah yeah yeah.

Speaker 3 (40:11):
Do you ever do you ever think about it? There
You're like, ohy hun, let's open it up. Let's really
become a part of gay culture.

Speaker 1 (40:21):
Yeah, touche.

Speaker 2 (40:23):
I don't know.

Speaker 7 (40:24):
Listen, if he I am very open, I really am.
So if he said to me, I don't, I don't know,
Like if he's not being fulfilled, I'm married.

Speaker 2 (40:33):
So I stopped giving head obviously, right, Wow, that's what you.

Speaker 1 (40:38):
Do and he still does your taxes.

Speaker 2 (40:40):
I know, Oh my god, oh I know, wow, I
have to do other things.

Speaker 7 (40:46):
Yes, yes, but I you know, I said, He's like,
it's very sad.

Speaker 2 (40:50):
I'm like, I know, I know, I'll do.

Speaker 7 (40:51):
I'm just hired, like I work all ye, like I'm tired,
and you know, I really feel like I was like,
just go get a rubin tug, like.

Speaker 2 (40:58):
Do go doo.

Speaker 1 (41:00):
I don't know, and he's.

Speaker 2 (41:01):
Like, seriously, I'm like, gow, I don't just go.

Speaker 7 (41:04):
That's too shy, I know, but you know it doesn't
but so would I open.

Speaker 2 (41:08):
I don't know. I don't know if this is not
for fishing for compliments, do not clap. I don't need it.
I don't know if I could still pull.

Speaker 1 (41:15):
I don't know.

Speaker 2 (41:15):
I've been all I swear to you.

Speaker 7 (41:19):
I have been around gay people for one hundred and
twenty five years. I don't know if the pussy still
got power. I don't know, Shika, I don't know, you.

Speaker 1 (41:28):
Know, I don't know.

Speaker 2 (41:31):
I'm not fisher.

Speaker 3 (41:32):
I don't know.

Speaker 1 (41:34):
You know what the thing is though.

Speaker 3 (41:35):
I feel like nowadays straight men love to be around
gay guys, whereas back in the day they were like, oh,
I don't know gay guys.

Speaker 1 (41:42):
Yeah.

Speaker 3 (41:42):
Nowadays, straight guys they gravitate towards gay guys because A
the women, yeah, the women, and b they can actually
because straight men, I think, do want to talk about
their feelings. They do, but they just can't do it
to each other. So when they find comfort in a
gay man, so many straight men will spill their guts

(42:03):
to me. Yeah, and I'll be like, wow, it's another
element of the repression.

Speaker 2 (42:08):
Yeah, no, you're right.

Speaker 3 (42:08):
So when you're surrounded by gays, these straight men in
the Year of Our Lord twenty twenty three are gonna
come flocking.

Speaker 1 (42:15):
And then Michelle, you're gonna be pulling.

Speaker 2 (42:17):
I don't, you're gonna be pulling. I should try a
straight bar every now. Do they exist?

Speaker 1 (42:23):
They're out there.

Speaker 3 (42:23):
We were just at one across the street.

Speaker 1 (42:28):
What is it called Compton Arms. Compton Compton Arms.

Speaker 2 (42:32):
Yeah, that's straight that felt and then we went to
the pub's a go team.

Speaker 1 (42:39):
Go Team.

Speaker 3 (42:41):
I drank three guinnesses before I got here, like I
was in football, dude, Yeah, I know, wow bro, oh yeah,
I have a coach dad and everything.

Speaker 7 (42:50):
I tell you.

Speaker 3 (42:50):
I was a code switching icon really yes, oh yeah,
oh yeah, yeah yeah not not now you can tell
by my sort of pulled together Look, it's.

Speaker 8 (43:00):
Fabulous code switch, are you?

Speaker 1 (43:11):
You know?

Speaker 3 (43:12):
Years ago it was like one of the first conversations
I ever had with Rue, and it was it was
we were talking about monogamy and I was dating someone
and I was like, you know, I'm wanting to bring
up monogamy and my boyfriend's not into it, and we're
having a conversation and Ruder's flat out.

Speaker 1 (43:27):
Goes, well, monogamy is unrealistic and doesn't exist.

Speaker 2 (43:33):
It's a tough thing to do. It's a tough it's
a commitment, flat out Yes.

Speaker 1 (43:38):
Yeah.

Speaker 2 (43:38):
I love the way the world is going. I love that.

Speaker 7 (43:41):
It's like if it works for you and it works
for your partner and protect yourself and be happy.

Speaker 2 (43:44):
I mean, I don't see what's wrong with that.

Speaker 1 (43:46):
I think it's beautiful.

Speaker 2 (43:47):
So you got to know what works for you and
figure it out.

Speaker 3 (43:50):
Yeah, you know, we've been joking that, like this entire conversation,
there's going to be like sniper red dots on us
in this church, like ready.

Speaker 2 (43:58):
To get Surpris church still standing right?

Speaker 3 (44:01):
Are we? At any moment? It's gonna be burning down?
So every time we have a guest on Lost Culture RASA.
So this is a moment in time having you here,
we have to ask the question. So the central question
of last culture is thus, which is Michelle Visage? What
was the culture that made you say? Culture was for you?

(44:24):
So this is the defining like movie, piece of music,
pop culture, television show that you can think back and say, wow,
that is the thing that made me.

Speaker 1 (44:35):
Turn into who I am. But sex yeah, wow, now
honestly for me.

Speaker 7 (44:45):
So there's a few elements of culture in my life
that made me who I am today.

Speaker 1 (44:49):
Will want to hear them all.

Speaker 7 (44:51):
One of them was Broadway musicals, yes, or musical theater
does it could be West End to number two, UK
punk rock, the sex Pistols, the Damn the Buzzcocks.

Speaker 2 (45:04):
All of that was my shite. I wanted to marry
Sid Vicious. I didn't know that he was problematic.

Speaker 1 (45:12):
I didn't.

Speaker 2 (45:14):
He were a padlock in bled I thought that was cool.

Speaker 7 (45:18):
And then hip hop nineteen seventy nine, hearing Sugarhill Gang
and then get full I am so cultured in old
school hip hop. People don't know that about me. That
is a passion and a love. And then going into
dance music. Dance music changed my life. So when dance
music came around, and of course I'm talking about Madonna

(45:38):
going forward from there because Madonna was everybody. Yeah, I mean,
everybody knows how I feel about Madonna.

Speaker 2 (45:45):
And there's other ones too. Donna Summer was a game
changer for me.

Speaker 7 (45:47):
There's many, many, many music because I was kind of
a loner and a loser and a misfit and a rebel,
and I didn't have many friends, so I spent a
lot of time with the radio and it spent a
lot of time with records, so well, music was very
important for me. But when I moved to New York City,
I went to university there.

Speaker 2 (46:05):
I went to Musical Theater College because I.

Speaker 7 (46:07):
Wanted to be on broad and in America you have
to be twenty one to get into the bars. And
I was seventeen when I graduated high school and moved
to New York. And my mother sent me a fake
ID because she's like she.

Speaker 2 (46:19):
Did because she knew.

Speaker 7 (46:21):
Believe it or not, this is going to blow a
lot of people's minds. I don't drink and I never did.
I don't party, I never did, never tried a drug.
I know It's hard to believe because I'm a maniac,
but I was always virgo, very focused in control.

Speaker 2 (46:34):
So for me, I needed to go out to be discovered.

Speaker 7 (46:37):
No cell phone, no computer, no Google, no map Quest,
none of that stuff. So she sent me a fake
ID and I went out to a club called the Underground,
which was very big in those days, and I remember
walking down.

Speaker 2 (46:49):
These dark steps.

Speaker 7 (46:50):
I grabbed a girlfriend from college as that come with me,
and it was dark, and this beautiful, brown skinned boy
comes up to me and he said, oh you your face,
You're so beautiful, and I was like me, but nobody
really ever said that. Apart from my mother. I never
felt beautiful. I never felt wanted or you know what
I mean.

Speaker 2 (47:10):
I never fit in. It just wasn't for me.

Speaker 7 (47:12):
And he brought me down the steps and he opened
this curtain to the darkest room with the thirty or
forty of the freakiest looking misfits I've ever seen in
my life, and I fucking knew I was home at
that moment. It was a moment of these are my people.
They were voguing and I was like, what are they doing?
And you know, I, being this color, was welcomed into

(47:33):
a Latin ex house of all Dominican and Puerto Rican
people with dark skin and beautiful crazy hairdoos. And they
just brought me into their family. And I became a
member of the House of Magnafique. And then yes, and
then I was brought into the Harlem ballroom culture. Never
a question asked, Never you can't sit with us, Never
too white, too black, too tall, none of that shit,

(47:53):
No cancel culture.

Speaker 2 (47:54):
You are one of us, You are our daugha. You
are going to learn.

Speaker 7 (47:58):
And I became, if the first one of the first
biological females to walk in a vogue category in the
balls and that's how it started for me. Wow, So
that moment would probably be the moment. That moment when
I became a magnifique and walked in the ballroom culture
and did all of that up in Harlem, where I

(48:19):
felt that I had a family, a chosen family, was
probably the biggest.

Speaker 2 (48:24):
Event for me.

Speaker 1 (48:25):
Incredible.

Speaker 3 (48:26):
So I wonder like in the past, like really ten years,
but really more five years, like what is it like
to see ballroom culture really be celebrated in the mainstream
and now with like Beyonce's Renaissance Store, It's like completely.

Speaker 1 (48:42):
I mean, it is monoculture.

Speaker 3 (48:44):
I wonder what it's like for you, as someone that
was on the ground, being really a part of that authentically,
what is it like to watch it explode like this?

Speaker 2 (48:52):
It's beautiful, It's deserved.

Speaker 7 (48:54):
These kids are so talented, these kids, the magnifiques that
were in my house.

Speaker 2 (48:58):
You know, you watch Poe's.

Speaker 7 (48:59):
And you learn a little about it. So interesting, you know,
none of us lived together. Like there were some truths,
but a lot of them were you know, made grander
for TV. But it was amazing to see this culture
be told and it is more known now, but more
to learn of where it came from and what it
was about and what it meant to these kids where

(49:20):
a lot of them were living on the streets, a
lot of them were kicked out or being raised by
their grandparents and had no money, had nothing, and their
way of celebrating each other was coming together and having
these balls.

Speaker 2 (49:32):
These were a.

Speaker 7 (49:32):
Really big deal because we would make things for each
other or steal things for each other.

Speaker 2 (49:37):
That's just the way that it was, you know.

Speaker 7 (49:39):
And we would walk and we would compete, and there
was so much pride in our in our trophies and
our awards, So it was a really big deal. So
have people like a freakin' superstar like Beyonce pay homage
to it is like, yeah, yeah, of course it's incredible
and incredible.

Speaker 4 (49:55):
It's incredible because and it kind of at this point
now it has to be a little educational because like
you do need Pose to sort of like give people
like a digestible version of like what this time was.

Speaker 1 (50:05):
You need legendary to kind of.

Speaker 4 (50:06):
Have you teach like the standards and conventions of voguing
and like and like drag Race definitely and like has
broken the seal on that and helped that kind of
all come in. And I think like we're about to
move into like hopefully we move into a future where
it's like it's it's pretty shorthand and everyone kind of
has an understanding of like what this is.

Speaker 7 (50:25):
Well, let's hope and let's not forget because I did
live through the AIDS crisis in New York City and
seeing that happen, So having POS tell that story is
just as important as having Pose explain what ballroom culture
is so we don't forget. We can't forget what we've
been through and what our brothers and sisters have fought for.
So it's really important to have all that. I would
love for it to be shorthand so people understand it.

(50:47):
But there's so much more to learn because ignorance is
coming on stronger than gay education. So we need to
block that and educate through love not hate. Everything could
be taught, and it's people needing to realize that who
a person is, who they love, who they are, gender sexuality, fluidity, whatever.
I have a non binary kid who I want to
make this world a better place for, and in order

(51:08):
to do it, we need to do that through love
and education.

Speaker 3 (51:11):
Absolutely absolutely. Did you get a chance to see the
Renaissance store?

Speaker 7 (51:18):
I did not get a chance to see it, but
I am living all of it through TikTok and the
friends in ts Madison gave me the run down.

Speaker 1 (51:29):
I mean we actually came and saw it here in London.

Speaker 3 (51:32):
Was anyone at the London uh?

Speaker 4 (51:35):
And I praised Tattenham Hotspur and then people got mad.

Speaker 1 (51:40):
They were like, Dad, that's not a cloud. I'm all right,
that is a whole thing. That's the whole thing. I
didn't realize.

Speaker 3 (51:47):
Just keep your mouth shut, right, But it's a it's
a fabulous venue that I'm sorry to shoot on New
Jersey East Rutherford.

Speaker 1 (51:53):
Could never is.

Speaker 3 (51:57):
But I'm saying, like the stadium, Mett Life Stadium, it
is the it's a trap, Todd and we got to
walk out. We went to a pub, we killed time,
and then traffic was dead, and then we went home.

Speaker 7 (52:07):
Yeah, is no better in California?

Speaker 1 (52:10):
Is no better?

Speaker 3 (52:12):
Also, you can't you go into a concert at so
Far you can't hear it.

Speaker 1 (52:16):
I don't know how to.

Speaker 3 (52:17):
Explain, but it's a it's a heat conduction and you
can't hear it.

Speaker 7 (52:22):
That doesn't worked very well for concerts nor annoying.

Speaker 3 (52:26):
I was really excited last year on Dragons when they
did the Night of a Thousand Beyonces because I feel
like that was like overdue. Is there a night of
a thousand Blanks that you would like to see on
drag Race that we haven't done?

Speaker 2 (52:37):
Madonna's done well?

Speaker 1 (52:39):
Yeah, it's done well?

Speaker 2 (52:44):
Was that shady?

Speaker 1 (52:45):
No?

Speaker 3 (52:46):
I like, you must have been so shook for a
night of one thousand Madonna's when four kimonos came out, girl.

Speaker 2 (52:52):
And like, not, who the fuck is gonna choose that?

Speaker 7 (52:56):
Honestly, Canal Street, there is not one bridle, not one
like a virsion, not one borderline.

Speaker 2 (53:05):
I had that hat made the minute that freaking song
came out.

Speaker 1 (53:08):
I know, I know, we are owed a good Madonna runway.
We'll do it again. Now there's a lot.

Speaker 7 (53:15):
There's a lot, ninety one thousand Eliza's thank you very much,
oh terrific.

Speaker 1 (53:21):
All of them coked out singing something wearing.

Speaker 4 (53:25):
Now, before we move on to I don't think so, honey,
I need to ask an essential question off of vibes alone,
between Matt and I.

Speaker 1 (53:33):
Who is the Michelle and who is the Leah Remedy?
Who is who is too? I know the answer to this,
you do.

Speaker 2 (53:40):
I'm Leah one hundred percent, one hundred percent. You're made.

Speaker 4 (53:45):
I mean you okay, okay, and you know what? This
is a Remedy impression. Are you ready.

Speaker 3 (53:50):
I'm the kind of person who tells you the kind
of person I am. She always starts her sentences off
with I'm the kind of person who who leaves the yeah, yeah,
you know. I'm so proud of her, But I'm like,
the thing is like I have always been such a
Leah Reven fan, like ever since childhood, since since all

(54:12):
of it. I mean the King of Queen's like just genius,
and you have been her very best friend.

Speaker 2 (54:17):
For like how long twenty I think twenty years.

Speaker 1 (54:19):
So through the scientology Oh.

Speaker 7 (54:21):
Yeah, everybody scattered like cockroaches and you study.

Speaker 1 (54:26):
Yeah.

Speaker 3 (54:27):
So when she's in scientology, are you thinking like this
is a little weird, but like at some point like
she'll get out of it, or are you thinking like
that's the thing.

Speaker 1 (54:35):
You don't know, you don't know, you don't know.

Speaker 7 (54:37):
So one of the first things I asked her when
I met her was like, so tell me, because you know,
I did entertainment reporting for all those years on the.

Speaker 2 (54:43):
Radio and you'd hear about but you don't know what
it is. It's elusive. So I go, what is this
scientology thing?

Speaker 1 (54:49):
What is it?

Speaker 7 (54:50):
Yeah, it's a church where well, and she's she would
do what she was told, which was well, listen, if
you wanted to know what a Catholic mass was, I'd say,
go to church.

Speaker 2 (55:00):
Why don't you come with me to the Church of
Scientology and check it out.

Speaker 7 (55:04):
That was my Lee impersonation. So I went, yeah, and
this is my scientology story. Are there any scientologists in here?

Speaker 2 (55:11):
Whoo? Okay, thank you, Bun this was my story. You can.

Speaker 7 (55:16):
They start out and they get you in good with
some really important courses that can help your your way
of life.

Speaker 1 (55:21):
Always What did you do the one in New York? No, no, no, no, no,
the one in New York.

Speaker 3 (55:26):
I went to the one in New York when I
was in When I was in two thousand and eight,
I was eighteen years old. I had just gotten too
n YU. Me and my friend Lizzie were walking in
Times Square and I was like, let's go in and
see what the fuck?

Speaker 2 (55:40):
So I gave you take your personality test.

Speaker 1 (55:42):
I gave him a fake name.

Speaker 2 (55:43):
Okay.

Speaker 1 (55:44):
I went in.

Speaker 3 (55:45):
They put me in what I can only describe as
the pre showroom to Tower of Terror. Okay, like where
it's like this bunch of like bound books and they
closed the doors. And then it's like, I was like,
so you're watching a video and they're doing the thing.

Speaker 2 (56:00):
Did you go on the cans?

Speaker 1 (56:02):
I didn't go on the cans, but it was not
far away.

Speaker 2 (56:04):
I could, Okay.

Speaker 3 (56:05):
So then they're like, hey, just sign all this paperwork
and then we'll start emailing you and I'll never forget
what happened. So as I'm filling out the paperwork with
a fake name and a fake email. I say to
the guy, so, why are you in scientology and why
do you think it's good for you?

Speaker 1 (56:20):
And he says, you know, when I started scientology, I
was in a relationship that really wasn't working for me,
and I just noticed that every day I was really angry.

Speaker 3 (56:33):
And then all of a sudden, I got involved with scientology.

Speaker 1 (56:37):
And I'm not angry anymore.

Speaker 3 (56:43):
And I'm like, yeah, O, yay, yeah, you seem great.
And so then we like flat so you didn't take
any course, No, but essentially you understand why they get you,
because in the beginning, at least, what I'm understanding is
it's base that's a therapy.

Speaker 2 (57:01):
So in a way, but they're like courses.

Speaker 7 (57:03):
Like they'd say to me, well, yeah, you'd pay for
courses in university or college, so why wouldn't you pay
from here. So there's like data, and then there's like
overcoming the ups and downs in life and how to
be a better parent. And I had young kids, so
I was like, I want to I want to be
a good parent. I probably suck, you know, I didn't know.
I didn't know what I was doing. I had kids,
and I had no mother. So I was like, I'm
going to fuck these kids up. I don't mean too,

(57:25):
but I didn't know. They don't come with a manual.
You don't know what you're doing. I did my best.
Here we are, so so I go in to take
these courses and then I did the fifty dollars ones
and then one hundred dollars ones. Now, mind you, I
was working on the radio, so I didn't have a
lot of salary. So it came to like the eighteen
hundred dollars one. I said, I don't have the money.
I didn't have the money to do it. And they said, well,
you can.

Speaker 2 (57:45):
Borrow a friend's credit card. And I was like, what
kind of friends you think I got?

Speaker 7 (57:48):
Yeah, And they were like, you know, I don't know
if this is relevant here, but there's an actress called
Jenna Elfman.

Speaker 3 (57:53):
Oh yeah, we love Jenna Elfman, big scientologist. Never mind,
don't we love Jenna.

Speaker 7 (58:00):
We left door, we left arvingreg So when they said
they said, and I quote, when Jenna wanted to go clear,
going clear as getting rid of all.

Speaker 1 (58:09):
The defeat the Michigan this shit.

Speaker 7 (58:13):
Then when Jenna wanted to go clear, she borrowed a
friend's credit card, and I was like.

Speaker 2 (58:17):
Good for Jenna.

Speaker 1 (58:18):
I don't know.

Speaker 2 (58:18):
I don't have that kind of a friend. So the
guilt came right.

Speaker 7 (58:21):
They put me on the cans and my husband was
like eye rolling and all that stuff, and I'm not
I'm just telling you like it is. You guys can
make up your own minds. I'm not an sp but
well yes I am. So it came down to that
and I was like, I can't afford it, and Leah's
mother stepped in trying to make it affordable. The idea
of paying for me to do it is not really

(58:41):
on the cards because you have to do it for yourself.
So I moved back to New York to do a
radio a radio job, and I said, all right, I'll
go back to the church and I'll take this course.

Speaker 2 (58:50):
I took this course. This is when I left.

Speaker 7 (58:52):
Okay, So I've taken about six courses at this point
and it was time to make a commitment or get out.

Speaker 1 (58:57):
Yeah, am I going to do it or not?

Speaker 7 (58:58):
I still was like some and doesn't feel right because
when I say the cans, they give these things that
look like two soup cans and it's.

Speaker 2 (59:05):
Called an e meter.

Speaker 7 (59:06):
It's supposed to measure your energy to see if you
worked through what was in the course. I bullshitted my
way through those e meters like you could totally. It's
like a lie detector. Anyway, I get to the course
and they start explaining something called the tone scale, and
that tells you where people are rated in life. So
murders and pedophiles are down at like one hundred, and

(59:28):
like you know, a deity, a god is like at
zero whatever. I started going through the scale and literally
at like ninety something was pedophiles, Uh huh, murderers and homosexuals.

Speaker 1 (59:41):
Yeah, So I took.

Speaker 2 (59:42):
The book and I shut it.

Speaker 7 (59:43):
And when they do that, they come over and they say,
because there's a teacher walking around the whole time making
sure you understand.

Speaker 2 (59:48):
And he said what word didn't you understand?

Speaker 7 (59:50):
And I was like that homosexuals are pedophiles and murderers.

Speaker 2 (59:53):
And he said, what are you talking about.

Speaker 7 (59:54):
I said, gay people are on the same tone and
I said I quit and I walked out. He's like,
you can't quit as a girl by yeah. And I
called Leah's mother and I said, I'm never going back.
And they called me for months and I told lean Liah's.

Speaker 2 (01:00:05):
Like I get it.

Speaker 7 (01:00:06):
I get it, and I'm like, how can you do it?
And it kind of slowly started to dwindle and then
she started uncovering shit.

Speaker 2 (01:00:13):
Yeah, but she had to do it her.

Speaker 7 (01:00:15):
Way, and it's been it's been rough man, but she's
a fucking beast.

Speaker 1 (01:00:21):
I mean, yeah, she's amazing.

Speaker 3 (01:00:23):
I read her book and I watched the A and
E series Put Yourself out There, and I know it's
still hard.

Speaker 7 (01:00:30):
It is hard to this day because they see everything
she's doing. But she's only speaking her truth and letting
people speak their truth and letting She's trying to help
and that's what, ironically, scientology is supposed to do.

Speaker 1 (01:00:41):
You know.

Speaker 3 (01:00:42):
All I want to is for her to be in
more things because second act she.

Speaker 1 (01:00:47):
Was okay and best Buds.

Speaker 3 (01:00:52):
Second Act was my favorite movie of the year because
this happened.

Speaker 1 (01:00:56):
This was a choice that Leah Remedy made in second act.

Speaker 3 (01:00:59):
So j Loo's like, I'm stressed out because business and
also you know, juggling my life as a mom, and
Leah remone She's like, all right, listen, and before she answers,
she unbuttons the top button of her pants and then
she goes, here's what you gotta do, But before she

(01:01:19):
could give the advice, she's like, let me unbutton.

Speaker 1 (01:01:21):
This top button. That's that's a choice.

Speaker 2 (01:01:23):
That's I said.

Speaker 1 (01:01:24):
That is a real comedic icon right there.

Speaker 3 (01:01:29):
Amazing, She's amazing, and we celebrate, Oh my gosh, give
it up. But I always wonder about like clearly cool
people who are in it, and then like, you know,
all you want is for people to see the light,
but it feels like it's tiny.

Speaker 1 (01:01:47):
It's a small amount of people. Now I live next
to the Scientology Celebrity Center in LA and there ain't
nobody in there.

Speaker 2 (01:01:56):
More than you know.

Speaker 1 (01:02:00):
Yeah, she's the best, and that dove tails perfectly. And
I don't think so, honey, wouldn't you say, Bowen? This
is I don't think so honey.

Speaker 4 (01:02:16):
This is our segment we do every episode of the podcast.
We take one minute to rail against something in pop culture,
the culture in general.

Speaker 2 (01:02:24):
What did you choose tonight, Bowen?

Speaker 1 (01:02:25):
Well you'll see, you'll see matdam Bowen.

Speaker 3 (01:02:28):
So Boone's gonna go first tonight because I'm gonna I'm
actually do something sort of uh form breaking and exciting.

Speaker 1 (01:02:35):
So Bowen, such a rebel I'm the leah.

Speaker 2 (01:02:38):
Yes you are button your pants.

Speaker 1 (01:02:41):
I actually just did have to button the back. But
we have moved, all right.

Speaker 3 (01:02:45):
So Bowen Yang, this is your I don't think so, honey.
I do have a phone that I can time you.
So Bowen Yang is gonna take his one minute right
now to rant against something in pop culture that needs
a railing against Bowen Are you ready?

Speaker 1 (01:02:56):
Yeah? And it's it's yeah, I'm ready.

Speaker 3 (01:02:59):
Okay, here we go. This is down, Yanks. I don't
think so many as time starts now. I don't think so, honey,
Percy Pigs because because because wait, wait wait wait wait,
Decoram let him get do it, Decora because Decoram Now.
MNS Foods has a fucking choke hold on these things

(01:03:21):
and it's holding them hostage. How dare you have exclusive
sale over the best candy in the world, thank you?
And I can't go to a food so anything and
buy one along with my dental fluss.

Speaker 1 (01:03:35):
How dare you? I'm not going to M and S
for anything else.

Speaker 3 (01:03:38):
I'm not buying one of your fucking sandwiches, bitch. I
only have to donat you to buy this candy, and
then I feel like a fuck I look like a
groomer walking sentence with all the candy, looking like a groomermines,
you're making me look crazy, like a damn pedo, as
they say in the UK.

Speaker 1 (01:03:56):
Five seconds.

Speaker 4 (01:03:57):
I just need a one stop shop where I can
order Percy pigs off of uber eats or deliver like
any self respecting person in the UK would do.

Speaker 1 (01:04:06):
And that's one minute.

Speaker 3 (01:04:11):
And can I say, yes, I just tried them backstage
from us.

Speaker 1 (01:04:22):
Yes, how dare you?

Speaker 3 (01:04:24):
That's made with real Jews, real Jews. And you can
really tell, you can tell. I felt vitamin C flowing
through me. I said, our candy is horseship.

Speaker 1 (01:04:35):
It's true.

Speaker 3 (01:04:36):
It's true, Bohen, I really feel like you struck a nerve.

Speaker 1 (01:04:41):
Well, I mean, did you see the topography of that
was because they thought that you were going to drag it.
They hated it at first.

Speaker 3 (01:04:52):
They thought you were agreed that they thought you were
dragging it based on quality. You were dragging it based
on the availability availability it creates.

Speaker 4 (01:05:01):
Oh my god, I'm so done with artificial scarcity.

Speaker 1 (01:05:04):
Fuck off. Yeah, it's out there.

Speaker 3 (01:05:08):
Put it out there, and we're taking all four bags
of it and we're bringing it home and customs can
eat our ass.

Speaker 7 (01:05:19):
Well, if they're filled with thirsty pigs, they might they.

Speaker 3 (01:05:21):
Might quite enjoy it, Sirs and Madams.

Speaker 1 (01:05:26):
All right, so here's here's what I'm doing. Okay, four break.

Speaker 3 (01:05:29):
So you know, Bowen and I used to do a
live show based on this segment called I Don't Think
So Honey Live, where we'd bring fifty comedians on stage.
This is back in the day, back in Brooklyn. We
bring fifty of our friends on stage and everyone would
do a I don't Think so honey. And if someone
didn't have an idea, they could reach into what.

Speaker 1 (01:05:48):
Was called the troll bowl.

Speaker 3 (01:05:50):
Yes, people, and they would have to do and I
don't Think so honey on that topic. Now, usually that
topic was a beloved thing that it would be hard
to talk shit about.

Speaker 1 (01:05:59):
Julie Andrews, Julian Andrews one, yeah, Malala, Malala. Yeah.

Speaker 3 (01:06:09):
So basically what I want is I'm gonna do the
trouble tonight. Who hasn't I don't Think so honey topic
that they feel it would be hard for me to
drag through? Absolute it's so easy.

Speaker 1 (01:06:24):
What did you say, Princess d got it?

Speaker 4 (01:06:33):
This is Matt Rogers. I don't think some money on
Princess Die. His time starts now.

Speaker 1 (01:06:38):
I don't think so, honey. Princess Dye learned to drive.

Speaker 3 (01:06:41):
Your own fucking carn Tell where you're going. I don't
think so, honey, Princess Die. Your sons are fucked up, babe.
There had to be something that you could do.

Speaker 1 (01:06:54):
I don't think's, honey, Princess.

Speaker 3 (01:06:55):
Di Dody, Mama, we had everyone in the world and
went with Doe.

Speaker 1 (01:07:00):
You getting in the backseat with Dony. You're going nowhere fast?
Oh no, I don't think so, honey, Princess Die. They
have not figured you out on the crown, Mama, Miss
thing playing you is too tall.

Speaker 3 (01:07:14):
What's Mama's name is Elizabeth de VICKI too tall? Fifteenth
too tall? Princess died. The name is a little on
the nose.

Speaker 1 (01:07:26):
I don't think, soney, Princess died. We're really How can
you get even a little wet for Charles? You liar,
you're some fake princess. That one minute? Oh great rough?
Wh Michelle did not like that row. That's the name

(01:07:51):
of the I don't think so, honey. Game okay gets
a little rough.

Speaker 2 (01:07:55):
I'm on my way to becoming a national treasure.

Speaker 1 (01:07:57):
There I know, And yet you have to share the
stage with me a heave.

Speaker 2 (01:08:01):
Oh my goodness, Oh my goodness. I want to say,
do not reflect my opinion.

Speaker 1 (01:08:08):
We love Princess Die. I believe none of what I said.

Speaker 3 (01:08:12):
Donty loved her, Don't he loved Don't you point your
finger at me? He loves her, Donty love love her?
Loved I'm just saying, here's the deal. If I'm looking
like Princess Die, I'm not checking up with Dody.

Speaker 1 (01:08:28):
But he was so rich, he was so rich.

Speaker 2 (01:08:31):
I went to Harod's.

Speaker 7 (01:08:32):
He would you get anything in harrod It's just fucking magical.

Speaker 2 (01:08:39):
It's one giant palace of ood.

Speaker 4 (01:08:42):
Dude like this this, Oh my god. I didn't go
to Selfridges until recently.

Speaker 2 (01:08:48):
Love it sausages.

Speaker 1 (01:08:49):
We call it sausages.

Speaker 2 (01:08:50):
Sausages just because it sounds like sausages.

Speaker 1 (01:08:53):
Are these old doughty things.

Speaker 3 (01:08:54):
No, Harrod's was a Diana Well, herod was a yeah, Mohammed, Yes,
the father, it is the father. And he was here
Muhammad al Fayette, Yes, Tony Fayette being the Soviet correct
and he shucks up with Princess Di and he loved her,
and he loved her.

Speaker 1 (01:09:12):
Michelle, Now, no, no, okay, how do you want to proceed?
Do you want to do one?

Speaker 3 (01:09:18):
No?

Speaker 2 (01:09:19):
Because you I don't know. I didn't have one.

Speaker 1 (01:09:22):
There's nothing that grind, there's nothing that.

Speaker 3 (01:09:24):
Irritates you on a day to day basis. Well, well,
well it doesn't have.

Speaker 4 (01:09:29):
To be pop cultural, obviously, it can be something going on.

Speaker 3 (01:09:32):
You know, the color green, the color green. I don't
think so many of the color greens you've got. You've
got one minute on the color Now they're starting to
come for you about your hatred of the color green.
They're like, Michelle, you can't actually positively hate color green
this much?

Speaker 1 (01:09:46):
Why do you hate it?

Speaker 3 (01:09:47):
Oh?

Speaker 1 (01:09:47):
Okay, this is your moment.

Speaker 3 (01:09:49):
This is Michelle, This is Michelle Vesage's I don't think
the money on the color green.

Speaker 1 (01:09:55):
Tarley starts now.

Speaker 2 (01:09:56):
I don't think so, motherfucker, the color green.

Speaker 7 (01:10:01):
If I was a pink person, the color green wouldn't
be so bad.

Speaker 2 (01:10:05):
But I am yellow.

Speaker 7 (01:10:07):
So if I if I had to wear a yellow
based green, people would go, I'm so sorry about the
hepatitis C.

Speaker 2 (01:10:17):
I didn't know. If I wore a yellow.

Speaker 7 (01:10:19):
Based green, I would absolutely look like well, I need
some in you.

Speaker 2 (01:10:25):
Know, infusion.

Speaker 1 (01:10:26):
That's the one that I'm looking for.

Speaker 2 (01:10:29):
But I don't do that too.

Speaker 7 (01:10:30):
I don't think so, honey, because then we go to
dark green. Dark greens look good on certain color skin.
But every drag queen that comes up has to counterbalance
with color correction. Right for the most part, we have oranges,
we have yellows, and you know what color doesn't look
good on that green very much. You don't want to
look like you're dying. The key is to look like

(01:10:51):
you're alive.

Speaker 2 (01:10:52):
Yes, In turn, stay the fuck away from pond scum green.
There we go, Yeah.

Speaker 1 (01:11:00):
And now we know, honestly, alexis Michelle found hopefully not
green in the future.

Speaker 2 (01:11:08):
There are greens I like. Just to clear it up,
I love jade, and I love Hunter.

Speaker 1 (01:11:12):
Green, Kelly Green Kelly.

Speaker 7 (01:11:16):
When you start to go green screen or you start
to go baby shit, that's when I'm.

Speaker 1 (01:11:19):
Out baby shit.

Speaker 3 (01:11:21):
Okay, So everyone out there looking to put their RuPaul's
Drag Race audition tapes together, Hunter Green, Kelly, green.

Speaker 7 (01:11:27):
Emerald green, amal green, jewel tones are beautiful on everybody.
But I will say this, people of color, dark skinned
people look beautiful in every green, so there's that jealousy
right here.

Speaker 1 (01:11:40):
Or if you're a not green eyed person.

Speaker 2 (01:11:44):
I'm green eyed too. It doesn't work everyone.

Speaker 1 (01:11:47):
This has been so much fun.

Speaker 3 (01:11:51):
Thank you for coming our guest Massicious, But it's ma
Roger the Moon.

Speaker 2 (01:12:00):
Yeah you know.

Speaker 1 (01:12:04):
What day cat that movie