"Hags Are Here!" (w/ Margaret Cho)

This is not hyperbole: Margaret Cho is so mother for this. "This" means appearing on Las Cultch with Matt & Bowen in a true time of need. The three friends and Fire Island co-stars discuss bouncing back from a breakup, dick as a metaphor for love and romance, and whether sex actually helps as a coping mechanism in life. Also, Margaret's dog Lucia (whose presence is like medicine), the POWER of Pedro Pascal, the POWER of Chow Yun Fat, and the POWER of John Travolta (at least at one point. All this, The Grammys, Beyoncé, Olivia Newton John's Bad Sandy transformation, hagsploitation, "The Hillsong Aesthetic", Reese & Ashton's awkward press tour, Tiffany Pollard, Monique as host of Charm School, Robyn Dixon's latest flop, The Cut's Etiquette Rules, The Geneva Convention and recent Madonna discourse. Get tickets to see Margaret on tour this year at www.margaretcho.com!

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
Look mad oh, I see you? Why and look over there?
How is that culture? Yeah? Goodness, ding dong calling? What's
the temperature? Well, the temperature is in celsius over here
in the UK, and so I haven't figured out the conversion.

(00:22):
I'm a terrible kind of student, chic, very chic. Someone
goes it's it feels like five, and I'm like, yeah, totally,
it's so. I was just gonna say it feels like
twenty five out here now. The weather thing, that's one thing.
The sort of pounds to dollars? Where are we at?
I can figure out pounds to dollars. Well, this is
the thing about the UK is the UK is like

(00:45):
totally bill less. It's all electronic. Oh, people don't really
throw cash around anymore, which is good and bad. I think, well,
let me just slutt in one thing. Did you figure
out your meatpie situation over there? I've gotten so many
request gusts and I will be trying all of them.
I will be trying all five hundred. So Bowen's big

(01:05):
thing was being in the UK. He can't find his
meat pies. And what I'm hearing is that the readers
have sort of come to your aid sort of when
they sent me all those recommendations from what I was
looking for pumpkin beers in l A. Well, they didn't
send you recommendations. They literally sent you pumpkin beers. No
one sending me meat pies in the mail, which I
am kind of disappointed in. Well, they wouldn't travel. Well,
bo I don't think it's neither here nor there. Think

(01:29):
a meat in a carb is a standard thing in
every cuisine. If they can make it work for tacos,
they can make it work for meat pies. I'm just saying,
speaking of twenty five, seguing into Adele, who was nominated
for her album thirty so interesting that it feels like
a loss for our Queen Beyonce, even though she did
break a record. It's so strange. It's like she's the

(01:51):
most winning artist in Grammy history, but they will never
give her the big cake. But they funk up the
cake all list every year. And that's the asterisk. They
funk up the cake every single year. And this is
my thing with the Grammys, just like when are we
beginning pretending this is good cake? Like when are we
just going to go to another cake sto another bakery

(02:13):
which is another word for cake store, and that's actually
real culture number thirty nine. Bakery is another word for
cake store, just like I like to call a pizzeria
a pizzas store. And you're always sort of correcting me
on that three are dynamic, you know, like it's our
Nickels and may routine, it's our Nichols in may routine.

(02:33):
Can I just be very transparent with the readers, just
just kind of killing me? Yes, okay, yes, yes, And
this is important and I think it's really good that
our guest is here this week because I think she
can really mother for this talk us through this. But yes, Matt,
go ahead. I have been on this podcast discussing this
is hard. This is I have been sort of talking

(02:54):
about this new man in my life, my new boyfriend, Lenny,
and so I feel like I wouldn't have come onto
this podcast and talked about a person in my life
so much if it wasn't a real thing, and I
didn't feel really confident, and that has made it very
difficult because, like, within the span of a week since
I last recorded on this podcast, that's no longer a thing.
So I'm kind of going through it, and I know

(03:15):
he has friends that listen to this podcast. So I'm
going to afford some privacy and everything, but just suffice
to say it has not been a good week and
the cycle of grief that is going on. I think
today I'm an angry soon yeah, um, but it's been
a lot and Bones of course been a good friend,
and everyone's been a good friend. But yeah, I don't know.

(03:38):
I just felt like the readers some transparency about that
it's not been good. I'm so happy you're sharing this.
I respect and admire the fact that you're sharing this
because on the surface it might seem somewhat embarrassing, and
it really isn't because you have people go through it.
You really did nothing wrong in the course of the

(03:59):
relations and ship, and we will spare this person any
deep discussion and dissection. But it was it was a
full love bomb and well and it's pretty shitty behavior.
Maybe that's the thing about relationships. Right when my end,
it's like you want the closure and you want to
like understand why and you want to really absolve yourself
or like, if you did do something wrong, understand it.

(04:21):
With this, I have so many questions, and I guess
that's what's difficult. But you had a better week, I'd say,
because you sort of got to like hug Pedro Pascal. Yeah,
we don't have to talk about it. You fell in love, No, no, no,
I mean there's no pathway for me, but um, you
don't know. Suffice it to say. I was deeply, deeply charmed,

(04:44):
as was everyone. And that's the thing these sometimes these
hosts come through and everyone is like, I think he
wants to fun. I think Peter's into me. This is
what happened when a Harry styles game like this happens
like every time there's like a heart throb for Harry.
Was like, no, he's not putting the moves on me.
I'm not convinced, Like I recognize what he's doing, and

(05:05):
I'm putting shields up, you know, because people like him.
That doesn't happen to people like him. Jak Sorry, I'm
just quoting his Grammy. See. For him to say that
him winning a Grammy things like this don't happen to
people like me was just it was so a lot
had to laugh. You had to laugh anyway. But with
Pedro was just like, oh damn, damn, he's a man

(05:29):
and a half. What did you say? He looks like
Clark Gable. He's Burt Reynolds, Clark Gable, carry Grant all
in one, and you are powerless against it. You are just,
I mean powerless against it. And he's so sweet and
his laugh, I mean, if you watched Lisa from Temecula,
where Ago would him legendarily to stake He laughs and

(05:50):
he breaks, and there's a moment where he laughs in
this like biblical register. He's laughing like God laughs at
his own creation. You really are wrapped up. I'm writing
poetry about this man in my head. It's crazy. So
you're in a place of your writing like happy poetry
about your being in newly in love with Pedro Pascal,
and I'm sort of writing like angry Atlantis Morrissette adjacent,

(06:14):
like how fucking dare you? Why? Why did this happen
to me? Like I'll get you one day, Missives. It's
like on the back of checks, I'll write something really
piste off. Is that true? I can just put it there.
And then I had a friend over yesterday and they
sat next to the thing and I saw there was
like a check, the back of a check, and I
had written something really dark on it, and I was like,

(06:34):
oh my god, if they turned their head a little
bit to the left, they're just gonna see sprawled out
on the back of a check like this. Angry thought, like,
I have to clean up. Oh my god, Matt, no,
this is you know what you This will be easily
romanticized in like a month. Oh no, it's it's it's
gonna become something right now, it's just only pain. But
but the fact, here's the here's the fact of the matter,
my sweetheart. The fact of the matter is the fact

(06:58):
of the matter is this. There's great medicine in the
Zoom treat right now. Because first of all, let's just
travel back in times when our guest was on the
first episode of Last Culture since they did, when we
traveled up to Nayack, New York, and we were freaking
out because we had never got a guest like this
on the show, let alone someone that was like such

(07:19):
a formative part of both of our lives. And then
we recorded the episode. I think we were both blacked
out because we were so like nervous, and you were
pacing in the hotel lobby like I've never seen you.
The guess knows how much she means to me and
so like I was pacing in the lobby rearranging the
furniture because I was so amped. Then we recorded the

(07:42):
episode a lovely time. Then comes the opportunity for us
all to work together on Fire Island. What a time highlight.
Beyond the fact that we were working on this project,
that we were lucky enough to be making a movie,
the fact that she was sort of nurturing all of
us in her way was really special. Will always cherish it, always, always, always,

(08:02):
and I know Lucia is not far away. Oh my God,
with no further ado, I mean, one of the greatest
of all time. Just our friend. Everyone, please welcome to
your ears. Mar Oh. I love you, I love you,

(08:24):
I miss you, and I love you and I'm sorry.
But the thing is is that with breakups, it's really hard.
Because I wanted to always wonder, like, am I mourning
the relationship or what I thought the relationship was. It's
the latter for me for sure, because it happened so
fast and it was so intense, and I've never experienced
anything like this, and I was fearful the whole time

(08:46):
that it would go as quickly as it came, Like
it was something that I was like, it was in
the back of my mind because that's logical, but I
was reassured that wouldn't be the case, and then now
it is. So it's just like that thing of oh,
I just kind of got in a way by myself,
but not even not even because this person, Margaret was
without revealing too much, was sort of assuring safety and

(09:09):
protection and like security, and that's what's the painful thing.
That's the worst. I think. Also, if you're an entertainer,
so much of ourselves is kind of spent in our work,
and then the romantic life kind of stuffers only because
we're traveling all the time, we're working all the time
at night in particular, um, so we have less time

(09:31):
to kind of commit to relationships in general. So when
you find something that you believe is ideal, it's hard
not to fall into the pattern mentally of thinking this
is going to be great, and then I project so
much onto people of what I think I want, and
then when it's over, it's like, did I really was
it the relationship or is it my projection of the

(09:53):
relationship that I'm warning. Yeah, That's what's really difficult is
just remembering yourself even a short time ago with a
completely different reality than than you have now. And now
I guess what I'm sort of working through is it's like,
what were the signs, if there were any? You know

(10:14):
what I mean. It's just it and it's odd because
I met this person in November and now it's February,
and I feel like it was like this big seismic
thing that just came in. It's like when someone comes
into your life, becomes your favorite thing about life and
just bails, and so then you're like, okay, wait, let

(10:35):
me actually do the process of like grieving it, but
also now the process of examining it, and especially as
someone who creates and like is someone that works things
out through common recognized pattern. Yeah, and it's just like
you want to make sense of it immediately, but it
is a process. And that's also frustrating because I want

(10:56):
to react to it, you know what I mean. I
wanted to make sense, but so little of it makes
sense because of exactly what you said. It's like, I
don't know what was real at this point, right. It's
so hard, and it's so hard when it's like your
life is so interrupted by something so huge and then
suddenly gone you know, like I still have pickles from November,

(11:21):
so I mean it's still I don't and they're still fermenting.
But I mean it's like you know, those things, like
it's it's a very it's short time to feel so
many big things. And then I always looked too, when
it's that big, it must be I mean I did
that I created because it can't other people can't possibly

(11:43):
affect me that much in my experience. That's what I realized, Like, oh,
I can't actually have been moved by another person. It's
mostly my own projections ramming into somebody else's instigation. So
for me, it's always like I think I kind have
created them in my mind more than it was actually.
But it's so hard. Dick is very Yeah, Dick is

(12:07):
hard to get over. Sometimes we get we just love
that Dick, and it's just really hard to um kind
of separate our physical sensations around that with what's real.
Oh my god, it is Dick, isn't it. Well, it's
Dick is like kind of a metaphor for just the
idea of romance and wholeness. Yeah, my goodness, that really

(12:30):
rings true because I think one thing that I really
realized about myself throughout this whole process. Oh my god,
Now is that I really do want that in my life?
And I think I had gone for such a long time,
and like, I don't know how you feel about this,
but like I was that kind of person that was like,
I don't need that. That doesn't complete me. I'm not

(12:51):
looking for that. I want to be able to have fun.
I want to be able to experience time with my friends,
like experience whatever is going on in my career. And
then all of a sudden, this thing happens where you're like, oh, wait,
like this actually is a part of my life that
in the back of my mind I was looking to
fill that role and then someone comes in and fills
that and it leaves, and I think, kind of what

(13:12):
I'm grieving right now is that role being filled, you
know what I mean, the future planning I was doing
because I was made to feel safe to do that.
Now that it's gone, I think one lesson I'll take
from it is, at least now you know that is
something that you want, because you can protect yourself better

(13:33):
next time, and also you can make space for that
next time. Of course, it's gonna be hard to just
open myself up again. I don't think I want to
look at another gay man for a very long time
right now, you know what I mean? My sister and
a half I have to look at him at least
once a week on soon. But but like I really
have been very afraid, I don't want to socialize with

(13:54):
any gays, Like I don't want any part of it.
Like I'm not that kind of person that can get
back up and like start fucking do you guys like that?
I can be just because I think, oh, you know,
the idea of getting over someone is getting under somebody else.
But that's also not necessarily productive either. Um, that just

(14:14):
lends itself to genital warts. But that's okay, I mean,
which doesn't matter that that's never more there, that's fine, table.
I think general wards are the thing that is lended personally.
You don't lend yourself to it. It lends itself to you.
It lends like it's a giver. She's a giver, she gives,
she shares. But I think, yeah, like sex doesn't really

(14:38):
do Like I kept thinking sex is going to help
me get over heartbreak, but it actually just sort of doesn't.
It just kind of makes it more complicated. Yeah, it's
also overrated. You know. Something my friend said to me
was like, oh, it's not as easy to go out
there and just like get laid. Like more goes on

(15:00):
in my head. Like my friend was like sort of
telling me, like you can go out there and just
like get laid and like that's the way you get
over things. I'm like, it really hasn't worked thill, because
when you have a large amount of sexual experiences like
that means you're also having a larger amount of like
weirder sexual experiences or like sexual experiences that get you

(15:21):
self conscious because like you know, sex is weird or
just aren't fulfilling period or it's just not fulfilling. So
having it does not mean you're winning, you know what
I mean, Or doesn't mean you're advancing. It just means like, oh, yeah,
you're putting yourself out there and letting people have your
time and energy in this way, and sometimes it pays off,
but other times it's kind of just like either boring

(15:43):
or weird or wards boring weird awards. But with with this,
what I'm angry about now is that you say you
didn't think you needed this, You weren't looking for this
and then now that it's taken away from you, it's
so damaging and devastating. But it's like this person like
created that necessity for you. It's this manufactured thing that

(16:05):
he's also taken away. It's like you not knowing that,
like fucking I'm gonna like, I'm gonna just quickly. It's
so innocent. I promise I'm gonna quickly just because this
is what's so many of mine. I'm quickly quoting a
Lucy K joke. I'm so sorry. But it's that thing
where it's that thing where like this guy like complains about,
you know, in flight WiFi being unavailable, and this guy
being like, oh god damn it. It's like this thing

(16:26):
you didn't have existed ten minutes ago. You're you're sad
and angry about not being available. It's not that, it's
obviously not that, but it is that thing where it's
like this person made you think that you needed it
when you didn't, and now you feel like you're going
to think that you do need it. And I hope,
I know it was perfectly fine. I mean, was living
my life, was happy, and then now it's just like, Okay,

(16:48):
that was nice. But now the funk. What Yeah, yeah,
but that's why I need a Lucia. You need a
little a little baby. She's sleepy. She heard her name,
She's like, Oh my god. Do you think she mis
Star Island? Yes, she does. She was such a star
on that on that whole Remember as Adam, she fell

(17:09):
in love with Adam. Yes, Adam was a wonderful p a.
She was so in love with him and she just
really enjoyed her time with him. Oh my gosh, Lucia,
it's so good to see you again. Readers, like you
can't see. She is absolutely filling the frame. She really
holds the Frame's a gorgeous She's a star. She's a
gorgeous Chihuahua. She was the mascot of the movie. Oh

(17:34):
my god, we all were so happy. She misses you. Guys.
Did you watch The White Lotus season two where there
was a character of Lucia who was very sexually powerful.
So I wish she could get a Skims deal too.
She should, She didn't really get a Skims deal. Yeah,
I'll call I'll call him. She was on the board

(17:57):
for a second. It would be everyone's dream come true
if that happened. Her is I want to start doing
a series of hag exploitation movies with her and like, um,
you know Baby Jane style like exploitation. Like, um, I
think exploitation is going to make a comeback. I want
to do about like kind of etiquette calumnists from competing

(18:20):
newspapers battling it out and one murders the other. It's
called bad manners. That's powerful. It's it's let me tell
you something. It's getting bought in. Let's pitch it, make
to make decisions. We're buying on pets. Yes, that is
genuinely I mean you already know this. I don't mean

(18:40):
just not patronizing. That is a brilliant idea. I think
it's really good. I love exploitation from the seven sixties
and seventies, and I feel like it needs to make
a strong comeback, especially like with the success of all
of her stuff, and then also these older women kind
of getting these accolades, like Michelle O, this is like
a time for us. Everything ever where has haxploitation. Anything

(19:02):
everywhere is t exploitation. Hags are here, as are here
to stay. So like, what is like the ultimate exploitation movie?
Is it like Mommy Dear. Yeah, for sure. I think
the ultimate is whatever Happened to Baby Jane. But there's
also you know, it's like straight Jacket. I think even
Johnny Guitar would any of like the latter Joan Crawford
movies All About Eve is probably Yeah, that's probably exploitation,

(19:25):
really okay, So it can be prestige. It can be
like literally like one of the best films ever made. Yeah,
or like Carsonic and Old Lace or Carrie Grants the
fag in that hot. I mean, it's a rich, very
diverse cinematic landscape that we but we haven't had the
exploitation for quite a long time, so we need to

(19:47):
start it up again. Yeah. The closest we get now
is like eight for Brady, which is great too. No,
but I think it's like the that's a movie that
I would go see. I don't know if I would
see it in the theater. I haven't made up my mind.
I wouldn't see Megan in the theater. Last You'll have
a lot of fun. You gotta go see that in
the dinner. I'm thinking of going to see A Dye

(20:08):
for Brady in theaters, Like I think that looks Sudi
saw it the other day and said it was fun. Matt,
did you and I go see a book Club together? No,
we didn't go see book Club together, but it's getting
a sequel and we can definitely know, I think, and
we loved it. Yeah, book Club is I mean like
when I saw the trailer for a d for Brady,
I was with my parents because I think we were
going to see the Glass Onion, and every all four

(20:30):
of us is my parents, me and my aunt all
turns to each other and we're just like said different
variations of the word delightful. We're like, come on, like,
who doesn't want to see those four absolutely going for it?
You know what else I wanted to talk about. They
look like they're having fun on doing press, Like Rita
Mirando is definitely like the Ham. She's definitely the one
that gets up and runs the show. And Sally Fields
kind of like oh yeah, yeah this like but you

(20:52):
get a sense the vibes are generally good. Have you
guys seen any clips from the press tour with Reese
Witherspoon and Ashton Kuitcher Right now, they're in this movie
called You're Placed or Mind, which is like I guess
they played people that fucked years ago and they stayed friends,
and so they decided, like to switch apartments. One goes
to l A and one goes to New York and
they have these experiences and during it realized they still

(21:15):
love each other. The press tour, it is I've never
seen two people fake it less. They really look it up.
It is wild, like it's just can we get a
body language expert on this? Reese for this one standing
in front, arms folded like this shoulders up while while
Ashton is like on the side, like there's clear there's

(21:37):
like a fucking arms length between them. I watched one
because I was fascinated, so I continued to watch interviews
and it was I think it was an interview with
like Rachel Lindsay for Extra and she was like, now,
did y'all know each other before this? Had y'all worked
together before? And Reese was like, uh no, well, well
I'm looking let me look this up. Reese must have

(21:58):
produced it. Yeah, I mean, don't just look at a
picture of them standing each other. It is so clear.
It's it's like trending on Twitter because it's so obvious,
just so funny how much she'd like either doesn't respect
him or doesn't want to be there, or it hates
the movie or something. Okay, so hello Sunshine, her production
company produced. You would think she'd have some approval over

(22:21):
her love interest, her Crowstar. I mean that's well, something
must have happened during production. Then it's such an anachronism
that movie, Like it looks like it came out in
like ten, Like it's a very weird like Matthew McConaughey
Kate Hudson's style, like romantic comedy from their early two thousand's.

(22:42):
It's a weird throwback that. Yeah, it's very curious and
it feels also like Dragon Drop Stars to Let's take
it to Paradise, right, It's like, of course, like we
we hit the ultimate jackpot and it's like George Clooney
and Julia Roberts yea like and now we have this script.
Reese is going to produce it. Who do we get
that's like famous enough that this is gonna make sense.

(23:02):
Blah blah blah. Let's make it work for two three
And they pick Ashton Kutcher and then they put them
out there together and it's like, oh, they hate each other.
Like that's like I'm not watching this. That's too bad
because Elean Brush Mchanic wrote and directed, and we love
her for crazy ex girlfriend and Devils Product of course,
but this is God. I can't it over the race
nation and sort of dynamic of it all. Then if

(23:24):
that's I'm not talking about the movie at all. We
haven't seen the movie. It might be great just them
doing the press tour. It is very evident interesting, wow,
But how much do you fake it? Anyway? Like at
a certain point and you just get tired of feaking it.
Like I'm thinking, like, we didn't see you Margaret a
lot for the press store of Fire Island because we
did it kind of separately. But like that was like

(23:46):
a genuine joy the whole time. But like what if
there was one person that was just like, oh, I know,
I mean, we had so much fun making the movie
and I just wanted everybody to see it. So you
want everybody to say, like, feel the feeling of joy
that we had making it and also getting back together
to do the press junkets. So it seems weird. Maybe
you can be such a big star that all that

(24:07):
stuff you're mad that you have to do it. You
know that you're mad that you sec already made the
movie and now you have to go on and do
the extra work of the publicizing it. But who knows, Yeah,
because it is a lot of work, I mean, you know,
and maybe they just hate each other. I want to
meet Pedro Pascal too. You guys would get along great.
You know. Um Jonathan Vanese he used to be my hairdresser,

(24:29):
but now he's too famous. But he Yeah, for years,
I love him. And then so we were excited when
Pedro Pascal first came on to UM Game of Thrones
and our nickname for him was by Pride because he
was really proud to be by show his character and
so by Bride. And then um Jonathan was doing the

(24:50):
Game of Thrones hair during Comic Con and he called me, going, okay,
because I'm doing I'm doing Bipride hair, and almost like
was so funny because it was like, now by Pride
was his name. So every time I see him, I'm like, oh,
it's by Pride, and I really want to call it
when I when I see him, I want to call
him by Pride and tell him why he's by Pride,
because he's by Pride, honestly, for by pride to be

(25:12):
the biggest star in Hollywood right now. I think it's
so gorgeous. And you know, people like that, there's very
rare where you feel like they are making love to
everybody they meet. I'm describing, yes, Sorr, I keep going.
I mean I've never met him, but the only other
people that I have met that have that is David
Bowie and chat Oh my god, A course of course,

(25:37):
Fat Wait went like in person. Yeah, we had lunch
at the Pan Pacific Hotel in the very top um
in San Francisco, in and um, John, we wanted to
introduce us. We had this thing and then John laughed
and then it was me and Chow Yun Fat and
I was talking about all of his movies that I

(25:59):
had seen so many of them. You know, he was
really impressed of my knowledge of even his romantic comedies
and things that nobody had seen. Is like melodramas, Hong
Kong melodramas, and he was it was big in his presence,
was just like he was like making love to everybody
in the room, but not in a sexual way and
pure cinematic romance way like a Carry Grant or Clark Gable.

(26:23):
That feeling but Raynold's that feeling. Um, it's definitely that. Yeah.
And David Bowie, Oh my god, that's a great little
trio right there, and like a Talian fat and a
Better Tomorrow, so good, so so beautiful, and and Crouching
Tiger crouching just like the center of it, Like the
stuff with him and Michelle at the end is just

(26:44):
so heart wrenching. But like another movie I used to
watch all the time, which probably isn't good but was
on all the time. I haven't thought about it in years,
is his Anna and the King with Jodie Foster. Yeah,
there was like a really shocking scene where like Biling
gets killed spoiler alert for Anna and the King years ago,
But that was like a very upsetting film that was

(27:08):
I guess like another era of Jody too, because you
don't picture her in that Movie's like a romantic, like
very feminine lead. Jodie Foster. We have to ask Margaret
the question, because here's the thing. When we did our

(27:29):
first episode with you, I think we were so excited
that we literally did not ask you the thesis question
the center of our show, which is Margaret Show, What
was the culture that made you say? Culture? Is for me.
I think it was in the movie Greece where Olivia
Newton John turns into black late TEXI leather sandy and

(27:55):
she throws down distigarettes. Tell me about it instead, Um,
John Travolta, and then they go in the big weird
like fun house thing, um, and you're the one that
I want. And it's like such a It was then
and I was with my cousins in l A. And
I spent the summers with them as a kid, and
we watched it, and we had the videotape of Greece.

(28:17):
We watched it every single day, and then at night
we would go out and drive around l A. And
they were a little bit older meat, so they had
a car and we would listen to Um Donna Summers
Bad Girls. So it was like I wanted to be
bad and I wanted to smoke cigarettes, and I wanted
to like have like that perm and um yeah, like

(28:40):
a bad Hole, which like Bad Girls is such a
great record and such a it's such a the celebration
of the sex worker, which is really cool. I I
really I love that record. I love disco, and I
love the disco kind of grease fifties and seventies collide um.
So that to me, I think it was like the
cultures was for me at that time. That was when

(29:03):
it popped off. Do you remember around what age you
were when when hit. I was probably about ten or twelve,
already wanted to smoke cigarettes. Yeah, definitely definitely stent that growth.
Girl just stent it. I wanted to smoke cigarettes. I
wanted to ride around in cars. I wanted to listen

(29:24):
to disco and watch Grease. Yeah, to me, it was
a really formative time. And I got to work with
Olivia Newton John later and she and I became friends.
And she would come to see my comedy shows and
like the improv in l A. And she would run
up and she was just for fun, just for fun.
You know, saw that you're here just for fun, just

(29:45):
for fun, and run off. And she she told me
to quit smoking. It's just just just do today. And
then I I so I quit smoking, and she, you know,
she just really had a choke hold on all my
everything I did. I really loved her. I can't believe
she's dead, but you know, it's so shy, it's so shitty,

(30:06):
but she was really iconic and I really loved her
short hair. I loved her music album for like the
video album for Physical, which was like the Physical video
which had a lot of gay subtext. All of her
videos had a lot of gay subtext, but that that
was a really great video album. And she was just
she was awesome. The person who made you want to

(30:27):
start smoking through a screen also inspired you to stop
smoking in person. That's right, And that's the duality that
is the Sandy bad right. Absolutely, I came full circle.
So incredible. She's amazing. Wow, also like a real smoke show,

(30:49):
like just like really stunning. Like I think, like a
lot gets lost because you're like, oh, it's just Sandy,
It's just like a thing that's a particulture and assume.
But like wow, did she like have it on screen?
And her voice it was amazing, like hopelessly devoted. That's
a really hard song. And just like the way that
her belt just like it just sours through it. It's

(31:11):
like she has that rasp, that like emotional rasp in
her belt that I think it was just really really
special And you can tell how hard that song is
when people just think they're going to be able to
do it at karaoke, you know, they whip out of karaoke,
They're like, oh, this one, and then like it's a
real death spiral to the end of the song. It's

(31:34):
so hard. It's so hard. Yeah, she's truly like a
multifaceted entertainer with the dancing and also singing and acting
and just the looks, the looks that she served for
her life. She's just incredible. So everything she's phenomenal and
her in travel. So I guess we're like an it couple.

(31:55):
Well she said, um, yeah, you know, wait it hang out.
But after after Kelly, it just got weird. You know,
I couldn't really, it just got weird, It got wead,
it got weird. After got weird, I guess. So it

(32:16):
got weird for Kelly period. She just didn't feel comfortable
reaching out. But I love that their collaboration. I love
a twist of Fate the movie and song. Um that's
a really lost movie, which I think is really good. Wait,
are you guys horny for Travolta when he was younger?
Totally yeah, right, he's beautiful. I think That's another thing

(32:38):
is because and the reason I say that about Olivia,
like you don't realize how stunning she was is maybe
because I started watching Greece when I was truly a
little little child and like just thought of them as
like the prom king and queen up there on the screen,
and my sexual like conception of them sexually didn't kick
in yet. Like the other day, I saw a picture
of John Travolta back in the day and I was like, oh, fuck,

(33:00):
he's gorgeous. Welcome back Carter. Gorgeous. Yeah, welcome back Carter.
He's gorgeous. He's really hot and carry really um, you
can smell that semen off of the screen, like I
you know what I mean, It's that like really like
pungent semen. But you know what I mean, it's that

(33:23):
really pungent semen. Yeah, you know what he's giving, Like
he's actually giving and this is kind of crazy, but
what he's giving in this movie, now that I've Google
image it is I eat pussy face. Yeah, it's like
a dirty coming from the back of the balls. Like
it's like a prostate mode, which I'm sure familiar with,

(33:46):
but I'm literally I just zoomed in on one picture
and I imagine, like his eyes are so beautiful. This
is like the eyes of a man that you're having
sex with someone and their eyes are so beautiful and
it almost takes you out, Like I can talk this
person with these eyes. What for me, it's the lips.
It's always been about the lips fortravlt you know. It's
like that, it's that perfect little shape. It was a

(34:07):
pre filler. No filler has been around for a while.
It just and they just look perfectly plumbed. And like,
how that's what Carrie is giving me? There was I
there's a sexual imprinting moment for me, which is a
little bad. We'll do it. This was like Oprah circa
two thousand four, but he was on Oprah and he

(34:28):
must have been in his like what late forties, early
fifties at this point, but like was working out like
crazy and he just like at one point, like Oprah
like asks him to lift his shirt up and he
like shows everybody his abs. This is like in a
pre tape segment, like not in front of the audience,
but like, oh my god, I literally have the thing

(34:49):
right now. Wow. Yeah, he's given like daddy like not perfects,
but like a man's body, a man's body, and which
is more and more of my thing every day. Yeah,
And so here you google image. I found it here.
I'm actually here. Why don't I yeah, no, no, no, no,
no no no, I found it too. I found it too.
It was that That was the moment for me. Yeah,

(35:09):
and I would suck John travel To still. Maybe that
would save him if you sucked him, because that's what
I'm signing up to do now. One breaks later. I'm
ready to save through your sexual power. But do you
guys remember when he did that. There was like a
movie he did with Jamie Lee Curtis where there's like
an aerobics perfect Yeah. Yeah, it's called perfect Yeah. And
you know what I'm saying, Like when he's thrusting the

(35:29):
air when sweating, it's so great. I love all the
looks in that movie. I think it's such a great
movie and it's such a perfect time catsle of like
aerobics core, you know that kind of look and feeling
so perfect. It's googling the words John Travelta Perfect like
a third girl. This does confirm for me, at least personally,

(35:54):
how religion kills any attraction, any zell at the person,
whether it's trim like Tom Cruise, like even fucking like
let's just say like Chris Pratt, like it just kills
it for me. I'm like, I cannot get hard for
you if you like love your church this much. It's weird.

(36:15):
It's super weird. This is not like, oh, like religion
is bad, but it's just like there is an element,
there's a degree and magnitude to it that like really
rubs me the wrong way sexual totally. I have such
a disgust for like the Hillsong bro. You know, like
anybody who's like has a lot of a lot of
bracelets and beads and like a beanie and like a

(36:35):
lovy shirt. Still it makes me so you know, like
how that look is so awful, so weird and it's
so meticulously put together too that it's like so much
bad taste colliding. It's like remember like the hills years ago,
justin Bobby, It's like that like old reality star. It's

(36:57):
like it was like tacky then, and yet it's still
the thing that people are like not only into but
gathering to be around. But I think that Hillsong guys
like done right or is that more of an aesthetic?
It's just the aesthetic, but that guy's done. It's the
aesthetic of like a mega mega church aesthetic. It makes
me so disgusted, you know, like a mega church where

(37:17):
there's a Starbucks in the church, so disgusting. Like anything
like that is so horrible. I mean, it's not about
the belief to me, it's about the aesthetic. It's awful, totally, totally.
There's a there's a Starbucks. That's a culture. There's a
Starbucks in the church. It's it's awful, you know, it's
all that's real culture in number seventy eight. If there's

(37:42):
a Starbucks in disgusting. Okay, this is gonna sound broad. Margaret,
you are my favorite person to say words. It's just
the way that you his words as weapons. To quote
Ava Max. That's I think what I loved so much

(38:04):
about your stand up albums when I first found you,
When I was like, I don't know, I've told you
this in like little gay ways, but like I was
like thirteen in my room and like I would listen
to your stand up albums on Rhapsody, and like I
would put my headphones in and like I felt like
you were telling me what my sense of humor was
from like even though I didn't know, but the way

(38:26):
with words that you have like the way that you
can throw a word out there and it hits in
the gut just never forget, like of course indelibly and
all of your stand up. But we were we were
shooting Fire Island and when we've started this on the pod,
but what I had just done that line about like
does anyone want to trade a Crest white strip for
a prep pill? And it started a conversation about prep

(38:49):
and I had mentioned like at one point like, oh yeah,
sometimes I skipped a day, and Bone was like, oh yeah,
you can skip days, like if we were talking about it,
and then Margaret just goes, I don't really don't, it's
not worth it. You're right, you're right, Margaret, We're sorry.

(39:10):
Don't play Russian Roulette with that. No, no, it is
all about Margaret with you. And I'm sure other people
have pointed this out. Is like timing obviously, but spacing,
like the particularly the spacing of the words, it is
like fuck me in the ass, bar and grill like

(39:31):
it's it's like the pause. And then the way even
bar and grill is like kind of hits the ear.
It really is just like a big part of your art.
And then Matt and at one point when we were
first becoming friends, we were watching some Gray's Anatomy scene
and like quoting it back and just like having like
a ball, just like saying the words at the exact

(39:52):
right times and sinking with it. And then Matt turns
to me and goes, this is why you and I
are friends. It's because we like appreciate the hate it
and like the register and like all of that stuff
where you know, I'm getting a little annoying here, but
like that is the thing that people can like build
a sensibility around. Well, I actually pitched a show with

(40:13):
you guys because I was doing this thing called this
History of the Game Show, and I was like, you know,
you need to actually talk to Bowen and Matt and
do let's do history of VH one reality shows that
became game shows, like I Love New York and everything
after that, like Charm School, Rock of Love, like everything

(40:36):
after like yeah, I Love Money, um, the Flavor of
Love mostly uh and mostly focusing on Tiffany Pollard and
have them just do full on recreation and I'm like,
you know, they know all of the monologues of Tiffany
Pollard from like two thou and eight and twelve, so

(40:57):
you really need to just do like a recreate Asian
show or like have them just talk, because we it
was a history of game shows from like the fifties,
but I was trying to steer them specifically from just
this period and only yes, yes, and it would be
all of them. I remember what it was. It was
like I think we were really obsessed, particularly obsessed at

(41:20):
that time with Monique saying from trying to school like see,
when you do clownery, the clown comes back to bite. Yes, yes,
and that's my production company's name is Clownery. We you know,
we bonded on that. But then it was like breaking
down that statement, like that's not that's not an old

(41:42):
English adage, Like that's not from like the Farmer's Almanic.
The way that she says it, it's like something like
this is a lesson that's been handed down when when
you do clownery. But she has such avity when she speaks,

(42:03):
yeah the delivery and there oscar winner for somebody of
her caliber to do a show like Charm School, which
also is incredible. I'm not trying to minimize Charm School.
And how many things we the prequels to charms how
how how far we had to go to get to
charm School and all those contests. It was so hard

(42:27):
to get there through all the other shows. But really
like the gravity that money brings to and this, she says,
when you do clownary, it sounds it sounds biblical for me.
The image of a clown returning teeth first teeth forward
to by you is the thing that kills me. Maybe anywise,

(42:53):
that's something to start with at the outset. So we're
dealing with the fact that you see when you do clownery,
which could mean anything, the clown comes back to bite,
which is like when so so basically what we're saying
is when you engage in a suspicious activity or a
shady activity, said she said, other participants in shady activity

(43:14):
will come back to attack you. It's it's an insane
way to say. Karma is a bit, but so many
other nouns are thrown into the sentence. It's like locational
it is it is really a rot. But the cloud
never beat the first when it returned to bite, and
they don't bit. She's specifically like kind of referencing, I

(43:36):
guess pennywise, she's implying that when you do clown y,
you like release a clown. See, when you do clownery,
the clown gets out, and you better believe the clown
will return when you least expect it to bite you
with its teeth. Yes, when you guys know, we've talked

(44:00):
about this before. The reason those shows ended on VH
one like there was truly this like beautiful era. The
reason the show ended, Matt, do you know, do you remember? Okay,
maybe it's different, but isolated. I think that someone took
their own life right afterwards. It was that someone a
finalist on Megan Wants a Millionaire. Megan was sort of
like the spinoff Bachelorrette from Rock of Love. She was

(44:22):
sort of like the star from Rock of Love. She
um she had her own show. And then on Megan
Wants a Millionaire, one of the final suitors was charged
for murder. Charged for murder, Yes, so he murdered someone
and so then, like they had, immediately canceled the show.
No more shows from those producers ever again on v
H one, Well, they clearly didn't vet the contestants. No,

(44:45):
totally totally, Why would they? Why would they? Exactly? That
was part of what made it so great totally. I
mean that was part of the charm. I guess, you know,
people weren't thinking about the mental wellness of anybody. It
was just kind of this thing. But also we had
less of bullying culture of social media than we do now,

(45:06):
so it made it some somewhat a little bit more
possible to do stuff like that. I think. I'm not sure,
but I do miss that air of television, yeah, where
it felt like if they were getting picked on, it
probably was happening on a few message boards or maybe
like in their own lives, like by people in there,
but who also watched the show. Now, it's like in
a culture of social media that I would imagine that
those people would go even more nuts. Because even even

(45:30):
on like the really like quote unquote regulated reality shows
of now, you know, like on even on like Real
Housewives of Beverly Hills, you still have like Lisa Arena
taking to Instagram and acting so crazy, and you can
tell it's just because the social media aspect is there
as another arena to act crazy in, and it's hurting

(45:51):
reality shows, I think because so much of the stuff
that ends up happening between these people on reality shows
is happening online. So that the Flickton drama is not
happening on the shows, which I think has made all
of it worse. Yeah, it's it's like a social media
becomes another character that's playing sort of a silent partner
of all of it, but that's very vocal as well.

(46:12):
So yeah, but I just remember my way into this
whole universe was going to so. I mean, I did
not grow up with cable, so go it was me
going into school. There was just a day when everyone
decided to tell me who New York was, where everyone
was like, you need to watch this show Flavor Love.

(46:36):
This girl from season one came back at season two.
Now this girl from season one came back and she
is terrorizing these poor girls. I was like, her name
is New York. What is wait, what do you mean?
They're like, oh, Flavor, Flavor gives these girls nicknames. Hers
is New York, and she, you know, tries to beat
up this girl who spits in her face. Like all

(46:56):
of this. I'm like, oh my god, and I was hooked.
I went on business trips to Gillette, Wyoming with my
dad's just so I could stay in the hotel while
he was at work, so that I could watch marathons
on VH one and I didn't have because because people
at home. I fell hard for this. It's amazing. I
mean I think that I had similar experiences with like

(47:18):
early Jersey Shore, like when they took Angelina's sanitary napkin
that was used and put it in the corner. Do
you remember that? Like it was just like weird stuff.
But all those people just like nailing you every day.
And then I think she's still on the show, like

(47:41):
whatever iteration Jersey Shore is in now, like I think
she's still on it. It's so funny. I don't know
those ones that the in particular with Tiffany Pollard really
stand out to me is something like we've seen so
much from her. I love it. Would we agree that
probably the biggest reality stars of that time, I guess
like from that sect was like Tiffany Pollard and then

(48:02):
from the mainstream sect was Amorosa. Yeah. Probably. I like Tunisia,
Tanisha Tunisia from Bad Girls Club. She does a meme
whether she's got the pots and pants and like banging them.
Tenisha is pretty good. You know who was crazy on
her show and no one really talks about it, but

(48:23):
was fully a chaos monster on Love and Hip Hop
was Cardi B. Cardi B was tossing hands, like charging people,
really getting into it on Love and Hip Hop. And
then now she's like, you know, obviously one of the
world's biggest stars. She's coming out and like muglaire left
and right. But this is someone who was throwing her

(48:45):
body with no concern for the safety of herself or
others around a sound stage to get her point across
that like she was to be reckoned with. And it
was like really crazy. I don't know if either of
you have like ever like watched the utube compilation of
like Cardi brasiest moments. It's really not how you know
how I spent my time her at the reunions and

(49:06):
like what was the reason like that, what was that?
It's so great? I like Mariah Lynn hip hop that
show create stars. That's for sure. Yeah, definitely you need
to go on the second season of Traders. What you
need to do that, Margret, You need to watch Traders
on Peacock as soon as you can. You'll love it.

(49:28):
You'll love it. It's basically like you know, Mafia meets
the mall Um but it's all there's this like Scottish
castle aesthetic to it. Alan is the host. He's amazing.
It's it's excellent. It's truly excellent. The way they did
the first season was there was like ten like people
that we knew in the culture, like Ryan Locktey was there,

(49:48):
like Brandy Glanvill, like who Surrey Fields from Survivor, And
then there was ten like regular people and they all
like sitting on a large table and Alam coming taps
three of them on the show older and they are
the Traders And basically the whole thing is like the
whole everyone in the house has to figure out who
the Traders are. And every night the traders decided to

(50:10):
kill someone off, so like like until it whittles down
to like, however many people are there, and either the
traders win or the real people win. It's it's literally mafia,
but it's like a literalized, like physicalized version of it.
On Peacar it was really good. Yeah, that's all right.
Are you going on tour the summer or before? Yeah,
I'm on tour. I'm starting actually in two weeks in

(50:34):
Vancouver and then I'm just gonna go everywhere somewhere around
perfect all over the place. How long is your tour
this time. I think it'll go probably until at least
November or something like that out there. Yeah, so but
back and forth. I'm coming back and forth. But yeah,
I'm thrilled, Like, you know, it's like finally able to
really do bigger shows. And you know, since the pandemic,

(50:55):
it's a weird with comedy, but now it feels like
we can to like go to shows and do shows.
So this is gonna be good. Yeah. I was just
out there all December and it was it felt normal again. Yeah,
and that was December two, so like by the end
of the month, like when I think a little bit
more people were being a little bit more conservative about
going out, Like as January approached, it was feeling like

(51:17):
it did. Yeah, it's good for the first time. Yeah.
The fact that it took this long because for you,
you were shooting the movie with us, like that first
summer where things were slowly starting to open up again. Yeah,
but you were working on the movie the whole time,
and then I imagine you were like probably working on
material for the show itself. Yeah, and then also just
like doing other things like in between. But I definitely

(51:41):
had been touring a lot less over the certain because
I didn't want book shows and have them canceled, kind
of like with the with Overcron Remember we were like,
I'm canceling again. So it's been hard, but now it
seems like, Okay, it's great to finally be able to
embrace it fully and go out there. Well, you'll see
us there for sure. Yes, that you've got to come.

(52:01):
It's gonna be fun. Yeah. I love saying your billboard
it was right across from Kylie Jenner's billboard on Santa
Monica made it. It was so exciting, it was. It
was exciting, it was, it was. It was great to
have the show out and then to be able to
tour it like in real time. And one of my
favorite moments was I think I was in Portland and

(52:22):
they had my poster up next to your poster were
up there it said Margaret Show, Matt Rodgers, and I
was like, man like not to be like a put
on a fat But if I could go back to
myself at thirteen and be like that that was going
to happen, I just would have I would have absolutely died.
So that was so beautiful. Thank you, so cool. Well um, okay,

(52:46):
so let's fussing, so it might be time for baby's baby.
She's been really good. She's been really good. She got
a new bag, so she's been like fierce in her
new bag, which is a little bit bigger and has
rooms room like, rooms roomy, and first for her to

(53:08):
put her leash inside and everything and say, she's really happy,
and yeah, we're probably gonna go a walk later. How
long We do two walks a day, probably about forty
five minutes or to an hour each. It's also my workout.
It's my workout too, so we wouldn't walk fast. I
let her lead because I do dog lead walks because

(53:32):
it's not my walk, it's her walk. So I let
her sniff around and so it can get slow. But
she's a very good companion and do do that with
Oh my god, she's the best. She really was like
an energy boost. Remember when we were Remember we were
in that hotel for the last two weeks and just
sort of on the house. Yeah, the base camp you
know at the trailer is just anyway, we all love her.

(53:54):
It's so cute. And then you guys were doing so
many really good Nikki Minage recreations you know what I
wanted to tell you when you went on Kelly Clarkson,
and yes, that was a person named Matt Rodgers that
existed that I did the movie with, and he's obsessed
with you. I ended up going on her show on

(54:16):
the show, so I did get to meet her. But
I remember watching that. I didn't know that you had
said that, so I was watching it. I think on
Instagram you literally just popped up and it was you
saying it, and I literally was like, I can't believe
this is happening. I'm so like, thank you for even
saying because I was like, oh my god, it's one
of Matt's heroes telling another one of Matt's heroes. I'm

(54:39):
so glad, and it was such She's so nice. She
really is, like I mean, we I think we've all
met her at this point, Like she really is like
exactly as advertised, but curses like a fucking sailor behind
the scenes. Did she did she give you a vinyl?
Did she give you a record? Yes? Yes, and lots
of potato chips? Do you remember what she gave you?

(55:00):
She gave me um Whitney Houston. Oh that's good bodyguard. No,
I think it was probably greatest Hits. Yeah, that's a
good choice. I got Joline Dolly Parton. Oh that's great.
I got Bruce Springsteen Greatest Hits, which I don't think
she like tailored to me necessarily. I love Bruce Springstein.
No disrespect to the boss exactly. Okay, So we are

(55:31):
at that point in the episode where it is I
don't think so honey time, but I forgot what is
I don't think so honey? I don't think so honey?
Is a one minute segment in which we rail against
something in the culture using the words I don't think
so honey. Does that drug your memory? Yeah? I know,
I remember, and I actually remember that I have something
for it. Okay, great, this is Matt Rodgers is I

(55:52):
don't think so honey? And as time starts now, I
don't think so honey, say it with me. Robin Dixon, Yes,
you have flopped yet again on the show The Real
Housewives of Potomac by withholding the fact that you your
marriage to Wan Dixon, which congrats to you, you finally

(56:14):
got the ring on it, but you have kept from
everyone watching the show that wand was in the d
m s with some girl and then he got her
hotel room when she came to Baltimore. Now, you can
lie in your own face, but don't lie to our face.
This is insane. And the fact that you'd be on
Wendy about her marriage, like participating in any way about

(56:37):
Karen's marriage, and you're gonna withhold crucial information about your
own marriage and then reveal it behind a paywall. Mama,
Bravo pays your checks. If you're going to sign up
there and be one of the real housees up the time,
say your real life, and then you're demanding and getting
on the rest of these women. What about you, Robin Dixon?
I don't think so, honey. Could you believe? I couldn't believe.

(57:01):
Margaret this is one of the real houses of Potomac.
She is we We have disliked her for a long time,
and this is sort of karmically. The clown came back
to bite. Let's just the clown came back to bite
because she was doing clown rate. She was bringing rumors
from off the show about other people's husbands, you know,

(57:21):
kind of conspiring with another one, always sort of getting
into it. Because a thing on this particular reality show
is they always attack each other's husbands and relationships. I'm
not sure what that is, but that's their kind of
method of madness. And then it comes out that her husband,
who's cheated on her in the past, is now sort
of in the d MS with someone else, and she

(57:42):
wasn't honest about it, and bravo. She was on Andy
Cohen watched It Happens Live the other night and Andy
Cohen was like, so, you're on a reality show about
your life, and then behind a paywall on your podcast
you reveal this part of it while also getting up
and everyone else's business. Do you think there's a double standard?
And they finally held their feet to the fire and
it felt good to watch. So Margaret Matt has this

(58:05):
great schema around the house is where every city, every
franchise is about a specific theme. So for New York
it's alcoholism. For Beverly Hills, that's the cracks in the China,
For Salta City, it's religion. And I think for Potomac
it's husbands. It's like infidelity maybe, and for Miami it's
are you ready for this? Mat? Divorce? It's about how

(58:28):
all these women deal with divorce. Because this whole lease
of thing is like really crystallizing all the things about
Alexei at like all these women have experience with divorce
and they're coming into support her because they're like, we've
been through this, which I think is what which is
like heartwarming and touching, But I think ultimately the show
is about divorce as a process as opposed to Potomac,
which is about infidelity or about husbands. You know. Yeah,
it's like it's it's just a very I guess, insecure group.

(58:51):
There's it's like this cast of women, half of them
are very insecure about their romantic lives and the fact
that like they can't seem to keep their ship together.
But the focus is always on the other happily groups
husbands because you you kind of get the sense that
it's just like it's this area of their life that
they can't sit with, so they're constantly picking and spreading

(59:11):
these like really like ridiculous, like baseless rumors about the
happily married people. Meanwhile, it just comes out more and
more like how conspiratorial and how how like, you know,
duplicit this they are, and like what's going on in
their own lives is like not as happy as what
what's going on on the other side. And I never
thought i'd say this, but if Robin does get fired,

(59:32):
I do want zeal to stick around for one more season,
just so I can watch her squirm and be like
without one huge I mean, I I don't think that
Robin survives proof that she was not showing her life
on the show, Like I just don't think, like that's
what you signed up for, you know what I'm saying. Anyways,

(59:54):
ripping stuff. I'm surprised you don't get into Housewives, Margaret.
I know it's one of those things where it's just
somehow it's it just didn't open up to me, like
for for whatever reason. And now I feel like it's
so far gone that I can't catch up because there's
so many different kind of universes of it. But I
have to do the Brittany Frankel podcast and I have

(01:00:17):
to go over an episode with her, so maybe that'll
help me get more. Call Britney Frankly to her face,
you should call Bethany Frankel, Brittany frank No, it's actually
very humblings. She Margaret, we're not even kidding. Only you're
comfortable with that truly disarmed her by calling her Brittany

(01:00:39):
Frankle Brittany, Brittany Brittney. She would erupt. I love, but yeah,
Robin Dixon continues to, uh do clownery and the clowns
come back to bite. So do you haven't. I don't
think so, honey, I do. It's pretty specific. Yeah, okay,

(01:00:59):
and we that specificity. Okay, and this is don't think,
sonny as time starts now, I don't think so, honey.
Misusing Geneva conventions like throwing it into conversation like, oh,
what that person did violated the Geneva Conventions because they
didn't like tip their waiter or something. No, you don't.
People misuse Geneva conventions either as like the thing that's

(01:01:21):
being talked about, or they think, oh, the Geneva Convention,
which isn't really a thing. It's usually in reference to
the agreement meeting after World War Two, but people misused
Geneva conventions all the time in like casual, gossipy, bitchy ways.
It's about war prisoners, it's about civilian rights during times

(01:01:42):
of war. It is not about you, you know, being
cut in line. It is not about like your friends
being forty five minutes late to a thing. It is,
Please stop misusing the Geneva conventions and casually using it
in conversations. And you have no clearly have no idea
what it is and what it implies. Google's freight look

(01:02:02):
it up. I don't know what it is. I just
told you what it is. You did, but I know
there's more to know, and so I know that. I'm
not yet saying you don't need to know everything. You
just need to know the basics, and you will not
make this mistake that I see people making all the time,
like in like comedy and like it's like a reference

(01:02:22):
that like gets the laugh, I guess, but I'm always like,
but no, like these people are laughing not knowing what
the Geneva conventions are. I think it's the word geneva.
Can it be literally anything else? Can it be like
it'd be like that violated by Miranda rights. No, it
did it. That violated New York magazine rules. That's good.
That's something. It's closer to the idea that's being expressed anyway,

(01:02:45):
by the way that rules of etiquette was wild. I
don't know if you've jumped in there, but I have
that the you like them, I like most of them
there there are somewhere. I'm like, I don't know about that,
but always wink, always win. That was just its cheeky
thing to put it there, but I think it is.
It is viable, Like you don't you can ghost after
first date. Trust me, I am all about a ghost

(01:03:07):
after the first date, after a second date. I do
think it's weird, Like we could literally go through them.
But there were some of them that were like, if
you are at dinner with a famous person, don't sit
them on the end. I know who's writing this? Who
who's writing this? Who do you think is reading this?
And also like Amy Saidarris had a great block, but
then there's some other person. I don't know who the

(01:03:29):
funk this person was. Hers were like I don't have
your assistance send your birthday invites. I'm like, who are
you taught talking to? Also the one that was like
never asked about work home? Is it weird to be like, so,
how's work? Is that weird? Like one of the things
you talk about? But I think it's okay to ask
about rent. I like that because I want to ask

(01:03:50):
people about money all the time. Yeah, that's one thing
I'm into burning down all right, this is Margaret shows.
I don't think so, honey, Margaret, Yeah, and her time
starts now. I don't think so, honey. Stop commenting on
Madonna's appearance. You know she looks great, and it doesn't

(01:04:12):
matter what surgery she decided to get or not get.
It is none of our business. You know, women are
able to age in any way they want to. She
has done so much for the planet and especially for
the gay community. We would not have gay rights as
we do without Madonna. Madonna has reared us, raised us

(01:04:34):
as a community. She has formed her art, music, fashion, everything.
She has formed so much of our world, and we
have to have respect for her as part of her art.
Now is changing her appearance to please herself, that's her business.
I think she looks great. I think she's always looked great,
and I want and you don't don't talk about that

(01:04:55):
it looks bad. I I love Madonna and I don't
think so, honey. Yeah, that's one minute, agreed. I agree.
Comments on her appearance are I get people's comments on
her behavior because sometimes it is odd. Yeah, I mean,
and she literally she also like she's always wanted you
to comment on her behavior. She she is provocative. That's

(01:05:17):
part of her thing. It has crossed over now and
I think maybe even a little bit by her design
to be like another talking point is this, but it
does get ugly because our society does not know, it's
not capable of talking about this with care. She The
other thing about her is that she invented past tense
and also it is currently inventing the way in which

(01:05:39):
a female pop star exists in the world, how her
career progresses, Like the stages of her career are like
beat for beat being projected into like every other girl
doing it now. I think it is fair to say
that like Gaga like pulled a lot from Madonna, it
is fair to say that every single pop girl is
like working from the blueprint that Donna has set. She's

(01:06:01):
still drawing out the blueprint though. It like when these
girls are in their sixties, like this is what they'll
be doing. It will resemble something like this. And so
it's fine that she like is looking the way she
looks or is talking the way she talks for the
most part, because it's like this has not been done before.
Is that there to say? Yeah? Yeah? And I love

(01:06:22):
just that she's able to live her own sixty, Like
this is like sixty for her, and that to me
is really exciting. You know, we don't have to give
up anything when we age. We can actually just enhance
and explore and be a part of this wonderful Like
she's a place in a place where she can spend
money on these things that I think give her the

(01:06:44):
appearance that she wants and I think she looks great.
Have you met her? I haven't, which is weird. Yeah,
that is I've never had the honor, so yeah, for
whatever reason, never worked out. She hasn't had the honor either. Well,
she she do through a boom She she do through
a boom boom room party. She does like a Pride
party every year. So we just got to get those

(01:07:05):
streams to cross. Yes, you should come to New York
for Pride this year. I would love to. That would
be fun and then we can hang out. There was
all those rumors about us getting a Pride float last
year for Fire Island. There was maybe for the sequel.
We should make a sequel though, I mean I really
think that we're we need to write. We see your idea,
what's your pitch? Do you have? What's cooking in your
brain because we know these ideas are percolating, your pitching

(01:07:26):
and meetings, us doing a reality show, game show like
what's going on? What's What's I know, the reality and
also the yangover and Roger that in my podcast, my
fake podcast network, the Fire Island Podcast Network. Um yeah,
I think it's it's where Howie and Charlie getting married
and we all go to the wedding, but it's in Provincetown.

(01:07:50):
That seems like the right thing. Yeah, that's been what's percolating,
I feel. And when you watched the movie back, what
did you feel. We haven't seen you since I know,
what was it like watching it? It was so exciting.
It was so exciting. It's beautiful. I mean, it's just beautif.
I saw a few times and I showed it to
friends and I just, um, I really, it's just such

(01:08:10):
a beautiful film, Like it's shot in such a sweeping,
beautiful camera. Everybody looks so great, you know. I just
also remember all the moments in between the scenes as well,
like from from off camera. But just watching it was
another level of like excitement and fun and you know,
just appreciation for all of your work and Andrew's vision. Well,

(01:08:33):
You're you're such a standout in it. I mean, you're
scene with Joel All, I mean, all your scenes are excellent, fantastic,
Margaret you Like we were watching it, We got to
see it on the big screen a bunch because of
the premiers you are doing. You always got such a
huge response. And it's also like what you're saying is
also like a really special thing about it. Like I

(01:08:54):
do remember, like you know that scene where you're telling
us that you're going to lose the house, Like I
just remember that day, like us going leaving the table
and then resetting and then leaving and resetting and trying
different things. And yeah, it's like there was such a
special experience because there was also like bonding going on
between us in this thing that ended up being really
good that I think we all thought was really good.
And then to watch it, it's like, yeah, your shoulders

(01:09:16):
drop a little bit and you breathe easier because you're like, Okay,
this thing we thought was special actually really ended up
in special. Yeah. Uh, well, we absolutely adore this individual.
I love you honestly, like we love you so much.
And so the tour starts when in Vancouver. It starts

(01:09:37):
at February eighteenth in Vancouver and goes all over for
the next year and check us on sale. Yes, Margaret
Show dot com and Everywhere Show dot com and everywhere else.
Oh my god. The touring girls this summer are Taylor Swift, Madonna, Beyonce,
Margaret Show, Catch the Four Horse, Horrors of the Apocalypse,

(01:10:00):
oh Man, and Lucia. It was great to have you.
It's so good to see Lucia. We had every episode
of the Song with a song, But what's the song
I got? Jeez, it's allegrifying. Remember I did a dance

(01:10:33):
routine to that one time and my parents and their
friends all looked at me after because we were they
were the judges, and they said it was a lot. Okay,
it was well, lave it at that. Bye.