Scott Galloway: The BIGGEST Money Mistake That’s Keeping You Broke!

Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
Hey everyone, It's Jay Schetty and I'm thrilled to announce
my podcast tour for the first time ever. You can
see my on Purpose podcast live and in person. Join
me in a city near you for meaningful, insightful conversations
with surprise guests. It could be a celebrity, top wellness expert,
or a CEO or business leader. We'll dive into experiences

(00:23):
designed to inspire growth, spark learning, and build real connections.
I can't wait to see you there. Tickets are on
sell now. Head to Jayshetty dot me and get yours today.

Speaker 2 (00:35):
If you are doing a lot of side hustles, it's very,
very difficult to be great at your main hustle. The
only way you're going to build real wealth and economic
security is to go all in on one thing that
is greatness. Focus. None of this matters, None of them
means a thing if you can have deep and meaningful relationships.
Scott is a professor of marketing at NYU Stern School

(00:56):
of Business. He's a best selling author.

Speaker 3 (00:59):
He has earned ail apps at following through lectures, podcast
and YouTube channel.

Speaker 1 (01:03):
Scott Galloway, how do we rewire our relationship with money?
Because most of us have a stressful relationship with money.

Speaker 2 (01:10):
I think we should have a class called adulting in
your senior year of high school that says, my kid
can do derivatives, but I just figured out he doesn't
understand the interest rate on his credit card. You want
to be good at money, put down the facade and
start talking to people about their investments, how much money
they make, what they do with their money, how they
save money. Women are correctly and justifiably, especially young women,

(01:31):
blowing by young men. They have more discipline, they have
higher EQ. Quite frankly, they're just more mature. If you
want to score above your weight class economically, romantically, get
out a big spoon and get ready to eat shit.
Life isn't about what happens to you. It's about how
you respond to what happens to you. What I tell
young people is you can have it all, you just

(01:52):
can't have it all at once.

Speaker 1 (01:53):
You're actually getting into a committed relationship. How do we
start having healthy and effective conversations about money.

Speaker 2 (01:59):
I think what really screws up relationships is not financial mishaps.
It's the number one health and wellness podcast, Jay Seti
J Shey.

Speaker 1 (02:16):
Hey everyone, welcome back. To On Purpose, the place you
come to become the happier, healthier, and more healed. Today's
guest is someone I've been really wanting to speak to,
and I'm so excited because in the studio we have
Scott Galloway, New York Times best selling author, entrepreneur, and
professor at NYU. Known for his sharp insights on personal finance,

(02:37):
success and discovering one's unique talents. He hosts the Professor
G podcast The prof G Podcast, where he shares his
honest and practical advice. In his book The Algebra of Wealth,
A Simple Formula to Financial Security, Scott breaks down the
path to financial success into four key principles focus, stoicism, time,

(02:59):
and versification. His podcasting book work together to offer valuable
guidance for those looking to improve their financial wellbeing and
personal growth. Please welcome to On Purpose, Scott Galloway. Scott,
so great to have you here.

Speaker 2 (03:13):
It's great to be here. Thanks for having me.

Speaker 1 (03:14):
J Yeah, thank you so much. I just found out
that you're living in my hometown and I'm living in yours.

Speaker 2 (03:19):
That's right. We swapped.

Speaker 1 (03:20):
We swapped.

Speaker 2 (03:21):
I think you got the better end of it. My god,
it's so beautiful here.

Speaker 1 (03:25):
I feel very lucky to be here, genuinely grateful to
be here. Scott, There's so many things I want to
talk to you. I'm a huge fan. Thanks, my team
are huge fans. I'm going to have to ask you
to sign too many books before you leave. But one
of the first things I wanted to ask you and
to start with, is that you talk about this. Why
are thirty year olds today earning less than their parents

(03:46):
at thirty and what are the challenges that that will
create in the future.

Speaker 2 (03:51):
Sure, so, first off, that's the first time that's happened
in our nation's history, and I think that is a
fundamental breakdown in the social compact. If you were to
reverse engineer to what is the incendiary port on e
every social issue we face, which turns a small cut
into an opportunistic infection, takes righteous movements but turns them
more angry, more polarized. I think it's that the compact

(04:15):
is broken down. If your kids, if you play by
the rules, you work hard, get some luck. The basic
goal is that our notion is that your kids will
do better than you, And when your kids aren't doing
better than you, it creates shame and rage all around
the household. So I think this is really what if
you will, it's kind of ground zero for what we
need to fix in the United States. Now, why has

(04:35):
it happen? The incumbents will say it's things like globalization
or network effects, or income inequality with technology sort of.
But I would argue it's been a concerted effort by
the incumbents who ultimately understandably weaponize government and put in place,
advocate for their own interests, and end up passing social

(04:57):
and physical policies that essentially have transfer wealth from young
people to old people. Let me give you some examples.
The two biggest tax deductions are mortgage interest rate and
capital gains. Who owns homes and stocks? People my age,
who makes all of their money through earned income and rents?
People your age or people your staff's age. COVID seven
trillion dollars into the economy. Eighty five percent of it

(05:19):
wasn't spent, and it was all debt fueled. So what
did that do? Most of it ended up in the market,
which sent housing prices and stock prices skyrocketing. It's great
if you own a house, it's great. If you're an incumbent,
it's great if you already have stocks, but if you're
trying to get into the market, it just took up
the price of everything. We need churn. When you bail
out the baby boomer owner of a restaurant, all you're

(05:40):
doing is robbing opportunity from the twenty six year old
graduate of a culinary academy that wants her shot. The
reason I'm I get to live the life I lead
and I have economic security is that in two thousand
and eight, we bailed out the banks, but we didn't
bail out the economy. And Apple, Amazon and Netflix, we're

(06:00):
trading it somewhere between eight and twelve bucks a share each,
and I was coming into my prime income earning years
I bought those stocks, and now there's somewhere between one
hundred and eighty and seven hundred dollars a share. Where
does a young person find disruption and churn? Because the
general viewpoint now is that a virus killing a million
people would be bad, but baby boomers getting less wealthy

(06:22):
would be tragic. So we borrow the young person's credit card,
We run it up, and we flush the market with
capital liquidity and bail out the boomers. Also, we have
a system that is the demo, and democratic is a
little bit. Is part of the problem that old people
keep voting themselves more money. Forty percent of all government
spending goes to people over the age of sixty five.

(06:44):
It's going to be over fifty percent right now. Currently,
the average seven year old is seventy two percent wealthier
than the average seven year old forty years ago. The
average person under the age of forty is twenty four
percent less wealthy. So there's this trope that young people
are entitled. I believe they're entitled to be enraged, and
that is pretty much every major fiscal policy is a

(07:06):
transfer of wealth from young income earners to either older
people or owners, so earners to owners, young to old,
and as a result, it's working. It's champagne and cocaine
for people in my generation. Not to say they don't
have problems, but young people are really struggling. Education is
more expensive, and i'll wrap up here, housing's more expensive.

(07:26):
So the primary means of starting to form a household,
the primary lubricant of upward mobility, education have exploded in cost.
So I think they're right to be really upset, and
I think it creates dissent and polarization and anger across
our society.

Speaker 1 (07:44):
Looking at life as things we can control and things
we can't control, and hearing that there's valid reasons to
be upset, to be angry, sure to feel pain. What
can an individual do today in order to transform that
for themselves?

Speaker 2 (08:02):
Well, there's things on a macro level. I mean, the
first isn't sound stupid, but vote right. Vote for people
who are going to have some sort of physical responsibility.
Vote for politicians who are going to do things like
a child tax credit. Vote for people who are going
to try and create more housing permits so there's more housing.
If you're a graduate of an elite college that's grown

(08:23):
its en downment fortyfold, Harvard, but it's only increased its
freshman class four percent, realize that firm or that organization
is no longer acting like a public servant. They're acting
like a luxury brand. My industry is really guilty of this.
When I applied to UCLA just down the street or
down the hill, the admissions rate was seventy six percent.
Now the admissions rate is nine percent. And people my

(08:43):
age like that because it's taking the value of their
degree up. But how many times say have you heard
people say I wouldn't get into the college I applied
to if I applied to now, well, that means your
daughter's not getting in. So we need to do everything
we can to try and counter this rejectionist LVMH exclusionary
strategy that is benefited the incumbents. On an individual level,

(09:03):
you still have as much or more agency in America
as a young person than any young person anywhere in
the world. You might argue, well, maybe someone with a
good education in India with the kind of updraft of
the growing economy there, But on average, you really wouldn't
want to trade places with any other young person. And
while things are maybe more difficult for young people than
they were for my generation, especially my demographic, A wide

(09:26):
heterosexual male born in California in the sixties kind of
hit the lottery right. Free education came a vge sure
on the Internet. But I do think young people in
America have it better, or have more agency than almost
any young person in the world. And you know what
it is. It's about getting certification, It's about being kind,
it's about making alliances with people, it's about workshopping your twenties,

(09:48):
it's about trying to find something you're good at, could
that you could be great at. It's a lot of
hard work. It's putting aside certain myths around in my opinion,
balance I can just tell there were ten or twenty
years in your life. I'm guessing you did pretty much
nothing but work. It's not easy in a competitive economy

(10:09):
to be outstanding and then surround yourself with people who
make you feel good about yourself, make sure that you
always mentally fit, and then make small investments when you're young,
both in terms of taking three five percent of your
income when you're a young person, putting it out of
your hands into low cost index funds such that when
you're my age, even if you don't go double platinum

(10:29):
or have a hit podcast, you're still economically secure. And
also make those types of little investments in relationships. Because
there's a trope or a myth that very successful, very
wealthy people crawled over other people. This populous Bernie Sanders
Elizabeth Warren argument. It's not the majority of very exceptionally
successful and wealthy people are generally generally jay high character people.

(10:54):
Because the best way to get ahead is to put
yourself in a room of opportunities, even when you're not
in that room physically. You want to be the guyrigal
that people talk shit about positively behind your back, right.
You want to be the person that thinks, oh, my
firm is hiring, and I know Jay's looking for a job,
and I liked you. I'm emotionally invested in his success.

(11:15):
I'm going to put him in a room full of opportunities.
So just as we talk a lot about the power
of compound interest and how one thousand dollars at twenty
two can grow to be eighty thousand when you're my age,
small acts of kindness, looking out for people, trying to
do them a solid, staying in touch, recognizing that they
you know, are you all right? Yeah, I'm fine, No, really,

(11:36):
are you all right? Those types of investments. I just
went to a sixtieth birthday of two good friends with
my roommates we met when we were seventeen and eighteen
freshman ye UCLA. And just like the affection, the bonding,
the joy we've registered over the last forty odd years,
you know, it's just so incredibly rewarding. And I instinctively,

(11:59):
not strategically, but instinctively made those types of investments when
I was a young person.

Speaker 1 (12:03):
And also just now Scott for everyone who's listing or watching,
Scott turned up of my house and saw Amazon deliveries
outside and carried them into the home, talking about high
character and being thoughtful and three. I was very touched
by that. You know, you definitely didn't have to do
that and went out of your way to pick them up,
And so you definitely practice what you're preaching right now. No,

(12:26):
of course, of course I genuinely recognized it. But I
want to talk about both. I want to talk about
the softer internal mindsets and habits that you're speaking about.
I also want to talk about the more strategic, systematic
focuses people can do. Let's start with the more tangible.
I was talking to my team about this before you came,
because I love getting into everyone's heads about what's everyone

(12:46):
worried about, what's everyone struggling with, what are we thinking about?
And one of the big things that came up was
I don't know how to save. Like a lot of
young people say this to me today, like I don't
even know what saving means anymore. They've not been trained
in it. The education system let them down. Maybe their
parents keep saying save safe, safe, safe, save, But the
consumption is high. If someone's thinking about saving today, how

(13:10):
do they create a framework for healthy and realistic saving.

Speaker 2 (13:14):
Well, the first thing you have to have something to say.
There's just no getting around it. You've got to be
able to make money. And the best way to make
a lot of money is by starting and making a
little bit of money. I coach a lot of young men,
and typically what I do on the first meeting is
I tell them to unlock their phone and I say,
I'm not going to judge you. You know, I'm on TikTok,
I watch porn. I'm not easily offended here. And we're

(13:36):
going to find eight to ten hours a week out
of your phone. And it's ridiculously easy with young men
to find eight or ten hours in their phone between Robinhood, Twitter,
what have you, and we reinvest it. And the first
thing is we got to figure out, Okay, for me,
it's physical fitness right away, We're going to spend two
to four hours a week getting strong. Especially I coach
mostly young men, but I think one of the keys

(13:57):
to mental health is feeling as if you're a young
man that you could walk into any room and have
shit out real kill and eat everybody or out run them.
I think that should be your goal. I think it's instinctual.
I think it make you feel strong. I think make
it feel kinder. The people who break up fights at
bars are usually big, strong men. The second thing, you
have to start making some money. I don't care if

(14:19):
it's flipping on your smartphone to be a lift driver
or a task grab it going to CBS and stocking shelves.
Even just a little bit of money gives you a
taste for the flesh of money and gets you thinking
about different ways to make money. And capital in a
capitalist society is intoxicating. So we have to figure out
a way to start making some money. Once we start

(14:39):
making some money and we have a salary and we
work at an organization, ninety eight percent of people will
spend everything that comes through their hands, right. It just
you live in a society where there are the most
impressive people and the most impressive technology ever in the
history of our planet. Have one mission, and that's to
figure out a way to present you with the ultimate

(15:01):
offer at exactly the right time. Oh, heading to Coppo
for a girl's weekend wouldn't you like to upgrade from
economy to Economy Comfort. Oh, only two of these rooms left.
How about upgrade now to the special SPA package. Oh,
you just bought a pair of on running shoes. What
about these bomba socks. It is nearly impossible for a
young person to save money if it comes through their hands,

(15:23):
if they get their hands on it. You want to
figure out a forced savings So everything from like the
Acorns app that rounds up and puts the money automatically
into a low cost index fund. Find out what government
programs there are in your nation that where if you
sign up, the money's taken out of your check, maybe
it's matched by the government, maybe it's matched by your employer.
Four oh one k Ira Roth. First thing you do,

(15:45):
find someone smarter your company. Talk to your tax advisor,
go on AI and say what force savings mechanisms our
most tax advantage that I can participate in at an
early age, because you really just need to take somewhere
between call it three and five percent of your income
if you start when you're in your twenties. And in
the UK they round up from four thousand pounds a

(16:08):
year to five thousand. There are tax deferred programs here
such that you don't get clipped twenty thirty forty percent
each year. So the first thing is I got to
start making some money. The next thing is, I'm going
to lean into my advantage, your advantage. When you're young.
Everyone has capital. When you're young, you have more human capital.
You have more time than financial capital. So I'm going

(16:28):
to lean into that advantage. And if I can just
figure out the discipline of getting one thousand, two thousand,
five thousand bucks a year into one of these programs,
I'm not going to touch it. I'm not going to
think about it. I'm not going to trade. I'm going
to focus on what I'm good at. By the time
you're my age, you're going to be fine. But the
easiest way to do that is a forced savings plan.

(16:49):
You have agency make some money and immediately, I don't
care if it's you start off making a couple grand
a month as a task, gravit or whatever it might be.
I'm going to take two or three percent of it
and find a pros that's it. It never gets into
my hands and goes into a low cost diversified index font.

Speaker 1 (17:05):
One of the things I love you talk about in
the book The Algebra of Wealth is you talk about
the challenge we have with our goals. The first is
we set unrealistic goals, and then there's super long term
so we say things to ourselves like, well, in the
next twelve months, I'm going to save twelve thousand dollars,
and it's like we've never even saved five hundred dollars.

(17:27):
And you talk about this need to set a goal
of like this is how much I'm going to save
this month, Like this is where I'm going to start.
And it's so interesting you talk about time and your
work with young men, because I think time is so
interesting because I think today most people would rather finish
their work day and we'd love to just switch on
a show or doom, scroll on TikTok, and so there

(17:50):
is more time that could be engaged in creating other
revenue streams, etc. But what is really blocking us from
doing that. I think everyone knows they have time, they
know they want to make more money, but there's something
there that's just blocking us from getting activated. What have
you found that is?

Speaker 2 (18:07):
So I can't speak for the whole population, but generally speaking,
the lack of executive function is the part of the
brain that controls that is the prefrontal cortex, the kind
of gas on gas off, the part of the brain
that says, stop playing video games and start studying, that
is maturing later and later. In boys, it's somewhere between
twelve and eighteen months behind young women. So in many ways,

(18:30):
a senior in high school, a woman who's applying to college,
and a young man who's applying to college senior in
high school, the woman is competing against a sixteen and
a half year old, and as a result, few and
fewer men are going to college. And we're in an
economy where forty years ago, one of three jobs needed
a college degree, now it's two and three. Women are
correctly and justifiably, especially young women, blowing by young men.

(18:54):
They have more discipline, they have higher eq. Quite frankly,
they're just more more mature. I say this in my
own company. I have a lot of young people, disproportionate
amount of young people in my organization. There's some very
talented young men, but I would describe them kind of
as dopey, almost a little boyish. I have some young
women in my firm who could be the junior senator
from Pennsylvania, women are just maturing earlier, So there's certain

(19:18):
biological things that get in the way of men having
executive function. I also think that there's so much temptation.
I think there's a little bit of belief of kind
of yolo, you know, this is it live for today.
I also think it's harder for them to save, just
because everything's so goddamn expensive, So it's discouraging for them.
It's like, Okay, I'm working my ass off and I

(19:39):
can barely pay for my barely pay for my rent.
So this is a this is anecdotal evidence, but it
largely represents the economy. When I got out of business school,
the average salary was one hundred grand. You know, I
went to quoteunquote lead business school. I went to the
high school. The average house in San Francisco costs two
hundred and eighty thousand dollars, so two point eight times
the NBA salary. Now the kids at has still in

(20:01):
a lead business goal incredible compensation average two hundred grand
right out of business school, but the average home in
San Francisco is two point one million. Why because as
soon as you have a house, you become very concerned
with traffic, and you start showing up to local review
meetings and making sure no new housing is built, which
is great if you already own a home, going back

(20:21):
to the rejection of strategy, but it's almost impossible now.
It's almost like saving for a home is out of
my reach. The travel industry has boomed, and my thesis
is that you have millions of young people who are
going into their mating ears and decided, let's say four house.
Let's say for a house then pre pandemic, a house
is two hundred and ninety k. Post pandemic, it's four

(20:42):
to twenty. Interest rates from from three percent to seven percent.
Average mortgage went from eleven hundred to twenty two hundred.
All of a sudden, the American dream has become a
hallucination of fantasy. Fuck it, I'm getting a backpack and
I'm going to do an Airbnb in Bangkok. And travel stocks,
hotel stocks, airline stocks have all boomed because I think
young people have given up on the American dream of

(21:05):
owning a home. But circling back to your question, it's
I think recognizing you have agency, realizing that this is hard,
it's hard work. You're working in an economy, build a
kitchen cabinet of people who can advise you. It's very
hard to read the label from inside of the bottle.
You gotta work hard. There's just no getting around it.
I don't care how talented you are, Beyonce, works are
ass off. I mean it just people who want to

(21:26):
be successful and influential after work really hard. And then
what I would also say is that forgive yourself. My
first job out of college was investment banking. I hit
the lottery. Everyone was super impressed. I hated it and
I wasn't going to good at good at it, And
within two and a half years I was back living
at home with my mother, unemployed. That almost kind of

(21:47):
devastated me. But my kind of success comes from my
ability to endure rejection and move through it to morn
and move on. So if you're in your twenties and
you're thinking I'm not making a lot of money, I'm
having trust like having a nice life. I'm not entirely
sure what I want to do, then you are exactly
where you should be. Your twenties are for workshopping. Forgive yourself,

(22:10):
but keep trying. Reach out to people for help, show up,
get the easy shit right, show up early, be courteous,
be kind, you know, think about how do I get
more certification? And then the moment you lock in on
something that you're good at and could become great at,
go all in on it. And I come from the
attitude I'm assuming people want real economic security. Some people say, Scott,

(22:34):
I'm not like you. I don't want to live to work.
I want to work to live. Fine, but have an
honest conversation with yourself around what you need to make
to have a reasonable life. If you want to live
in la and you want to have a nice lifestyle,
you just have to make a shit ton of money.
That's just the reality. But if you say I'm not
all about work, then fine, do you want to move
to Santa Clarita or do you want to move to

(22:54):
the Inland Empire? Or do you want to move to
somewhere in Oregon. Fine, but have a sober conversation with yourself.
What are your expectations and realistically, what kind of commitment
and trade off are you going to need to get there.
What I tell young people is you can have it all,
you just can't have it all at once. I have
amazing balance right now, and looking around, I think you do.

(23:16):
But that's because I had almost none in my twenties
and thirties, and I don't you know this whole life.
I don't know much about you, but the life I
lead now when I'm in LA I didn't even know
what existed in my twenties because I'm like, I need
to make money and I'm not exceptionally talented. So the
thing I can control is how hard I work, and

(23:40):
there's no getting around it. It'll cost you some relationships.
It cost me my hair, it cost me my first marriage.
And this sounds crass, but it was worth it because
now that I have kids, now that I'm older, I
have a lot of balance. So it's a sober conversation.
It's a kitchen cabinet. It's forgiving yourself. It's trying to
find something you're good at. It's a lot of things,
more than anything, More than anything, forgive yourself. If things

(24:02):
aren't working out in your twenties, that's where you should be.
Very rarely do people come right out of college and
go like this, Yeah.

Speaker 1 (24:10):
So well said so much to unpack the scott and
thank you for kind of giving us so many points
to check with The first thing I want to ask
you is should younger people today even aspire to own
a home? Or is the American dream that version of
it dead?

Speaker 2 (24:24):
It's situational. First off, keep in mind the term the
American Dream was invented by the National Realtors Association and
the real Estate Association that wants to keep pumping up
the price and the commissions on homes. If you live
in a place like Los Angeles, where I believe the
quote unquote the yield, that is the ratio the cost
to rent something relative to the price to buy it,
it actually makes more financial sense for most people to

(24:48):
rent here. It makes sense for most people in New
York to rent. You're in Saint Louis, you're in Lansing, Michigan,
it probably makes sense to try and save some money
and buy and take advantage a first home buyer's credits.
What have you?

Speaker 3 (25:02):
So?

Speaker 2 (25:02):
You want to find someone who cried frankly, if you're
not good at math, is better at math than you,
and say, does it make sense for me to buy
a home because you might be better off. The co
host of my podcast Raging Moderates is a very successful woman,
Her Nam's Jessica Tarloff. She's the Democrat on the most
popular cable news channel show called The Five Right. It's
for Republicans and Jess and she makes really good money.

(25:24):
Her husband makes really good money, and they've decided not
to buy in New York because they think putting the
money in the market will give them more financial security.
So greatness and great decisions are in the agency of others.
I would talk to people, but don't feel as if
you're a failure if you don't own real estate, because
real estate right now, as a percentage of GDP as

(25:45):
a multiple on rents is at historic highs, meaning that
you really don't want to be house poor. You really
don't want to go all in because the National Realtors
Association is telling you you're a failure if you don't
own a home, because the last thing you want to
do is just have no money for nothing else the
market corrects and your house doesn't worth the debt on it.
That is devastating emotionally and financially and from a credit standpoint,

(26:08):
So it's situational. At the same time, there's no getting
around the psychic There is some psychic income. I remember,
you know, before I got married, I was thinking about
I wanted to commit to somebody. You buy a house,
you get a dog. It's sort of these emotional commitments.
And also it's there is a certain pride of ownership.
I think it's situational where you are in life, how

(26:30):
much money you have, the city you're in. But buying
a home is meant to be an enhancement to your life.
It's not a suicide pact. And it may not be
right for everybody.

Speaker 1 (26:39):
Yeah, I think what it gave people as a symbol
was something to pursue. Right, we started talking about you
go to college, you get a degree, you get a job,
get married, you get a house, you have kids. Like
it became one of those temppole things. And so now
when you take it out, it's almost like what should
people be pursuing? Right, If you got married, you got
a good job, working, you're with your partner, It's almost

(27:02):
like people think they have to pursue It's almost like
the assumption that you have to have kids. It's the
same assumption of oh, where we have to buy a house. Yeah,
so what should people pursue instead? Financially, when it comes
to financial security, the.

Speaker 2 (27:14):
Goal is what I'll call wealth. The goal is going
to be rich. Rich is the things you see. Wealth
is what you don't see. And your pursuit should be
wealth or economic security. And this is what wealth is.
Wealth is having passive income that's greater than your burn.
Two examples. I have a buddy who runs M and
A for a Bulgbrackt investment bank, makes between three and

(27:36):
ten million dollars a year, dependent upon the market because
it's all current incomany, pays fifty percent taxes between his
ex wife, his home in the Hamptons, and his master
the universe lifestyle that he feels he deserves. He hasn't
saved a lot of money and he spends most of it.
And I know that firsthand. He has a lot of
sleepless nights wondering what happens if the music stops. He

(27:57):
is not wealthy. My father, who is ninety four, between
his pension from the Royal Navy social security and he
owns six washer dryer machines and trailer parks where he
goes and collects the money with his walker. He makes
fifty two thousand dollars a year he spends forty eight,
so he is saving money despite the fact that he's

(28:20):
not working, so his passive income is greater than his burn.
He is wealthy. So you want to put yourself on
a track to being wealthy. You want to say, realistically,
I can control how much I spent. I just I've
been coaching this couple living in San Jose and they're
in their late fifties. I talk a lot about young people,
and they say, Scott, we're in our late fifties. What
do we do. How much money do you have? What's

(28:42):
your house? With? Da da da? And by the time
they're sixty five, they're not going to have enough passive
income to pay for their lifestyle. I said, well, let's
lean into our strengths here. Why are you in San
Jose And they said, well, we've always lived here. I'm like, well, okay,
your kids are gone and you've just you go to
Costa Rica twice here. Why wouldn't you try and cut

(29:02):
your burn forty percent and move to Costa Rica and
take that economic pressure away and sell your house here.
I think your kids would love to come busit you
in Costa Rica. So the question is put yourself on
a path using basic math and what you really think
you're going to need in terms of passive income such
at at some point. Ideally it's by the time you're forty.

(29:24):
It's usually not, but it needs to be by the
time you're sixty five or seventy, because that release of
economic anxiety freeze you up to focus on what is
really important, and that is deep and meaningful relationships. So
the reason why I am so much happier over the
last ten years than I was kind of the first

(29:45):
forty five years of my life is that economic stress
was always there for me. I was raised by a
single immigrant mother who lived and die of secretary. I
felt like there was a ghost following us around, telling
us we weren't worthy because we didn't have money. Between
college student loans, the bomb crashed, and the Great Financial Recession,
I just never had enough money to have passive income.

(30:10):
Such that I was done, and a lot of people
never get there. I got lucky, sold my last company
about ten years ago for a lot of money. Now,
unless I really screw up again, which I've done a
couple times, I can focus on my relationships. The resting
blood pressure of a child in a low income home
is higher than the restling to solid blood pressure of

(30:32):
a kid in a middle or upper income home. I
think the majority of divorces are not a function of
infidelity or a lack of shared values. It's those things.
One or more of those things might happen, and then
again the incendiary on it is financial stress. Two thirds
plus of divorce filings are from women. And we don't

(30:53):
like to say this because we like to assume all
men are predators and all women are virtuous. But when
a man is under financial stress us the reality is
he becomes less attractive as a mate, and that can
lead to real stress in the relationship. So what you
want to pursue if you're not pursuing a home, you
want to put yourself on a path. You want to

(31:13):
get alignment with a partner. You want to track your
spending and put yourself on a path to some level
of economic security of wealth by say the time you're
sixty five. And if you're young and you're killing it
instead of buying a bigger flat screen or a bigger TV,
or maybe a bigger house, well what if I started
saving ten, fifteen, twenty thirty percent of my salary and

(31:36):
I got wealth by the time I'm forty or forty five.
Because to be in America, young and healthy and have
passive income that's greater than your burn. You're just going
to have a wonderful life. So it's not acquiring anything.
It's getting to a point of economic security or wealth.
And that's a function of two things. How much money

(31:57):
you make such as you can save, key to wealth.
It's not how much you make, it's how much you save.
And also the thing you can control is your burn.
You know, I have a friend who ran a hedge fund.
It closed down. He makes good money, but not great
money living in Tribeca with three kids, needed a million
bucks a year to live that life. Moved to Portugal,
lives an amazing life with a beautiful home, great food, childcare,

(32:20):
great education on four hundred grand a year. I mean,
these are problems of privilege, but that has taken the
world of stress off his shoulders. He now needs to
make a very good living, not an outrageous living. So
but surround yourself with smart people who can help you
make these decisions. But wealth is passive income that's greater
than your burn.

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(34:03):
use the code on purpose. When you bring up the
word money, most of us kind of go blank faced.
We want to reach for a stress ball. We kind
of you can just sense that it's uncomfortable to talk
about it because we're almost reminded of all the bills
stacking up and all of our expenses and we spend
too much on TikTok shop this week, and you know,
the reality hits and we kind of don't want to

(34:25):
talk about it. Don't bring it up. How do we
get out of that stressful wir ring? And you talked
about it even there with your background, Like I grew
up in a family where we didn't have the healthiest
relationship with money because we never had enough or we
always had just enough and that was good enough, and
that was always like you know, you're just looking at

(34:47):
your back balance sitting at zero all the time, Like,
how do we rewire our relationship with money because most
of us have a stressful relationship with money.

Speaker 2 (34:56):
Well, when you think about how they help people who
are depressed, it's a combination of talk therapy and if needed,
some sort of you know, pharmaceugal intervention. I think mental
illness or mental unwellness around money. I think we absolutely
need to one have more financial literacy. I think we
should have a class called adulting in your senior year
of high school that says, my kid can do derivatives,

(35:17):
but I just figured out he doesn't understand the interest
rate on his credit card. So young people needs a
certain level of financial literacy. Also, I encourage him to
talk about money with their friends. It's especially hard for men.
Women are disproportionately evaluated based on their aesthetics. Men are
disproportionally evaluated based on their economic vitality. So for a

(35:38):
guy to say, hey, do you you know I lost
a shit ton of money in the market. Should I
sell it? Do I get a tax shot off? That
connotes weakness. They're worried that they're less attractive. There's actually
something very British that you might relate to, and that
is British people. The best great I understand in Britain
that everyone wants is you get really high marks but

(36:00):
really low effort scores. You're supposed to be accidentally rich.
I'm so I'm such a baller and I'm so great
at what I do that I just accidentally slipped and
fell on a ton of money. No, it's work. You
got to think about it. You got to talk about it.
So I encourage people to talk to their friends and
if you're comfortable, this is how much money I'm making, this,

(36:21):
how much I'm saving? This is you know, taxation is
really important? Well what if I moved to Florida? How
much money would I save? You know, what if I
buy a house? Now I heard there's something called ten
thirty one exchange where I can roll into my next
property tax free. Talk about money, get get really good
at it. Roger Federer Do you think he never talks

(36:42):
about Toennis talks about it all the goddamn time. You
do you want to be great at money? Most people say, yeah,
I want to be great at money? Is anybody great
at anything? If I wanted to be an amazing evolutionary anthropologist?
Would I never talk about it? Would I never bring
it up in conversation? Would I never want to talk
to other people about evolutionary anthropology? If you want to

(37:02):
be good at money, put down the facade and start
talking to people about their investments, how much money they make,
what they do with their money, how they save money,
what they do to try and limit their spending. I
talk about stoicism. See if you can find a practice
where you get reward or a dopa hit from exercise
or relationships. Gamify saving money. My junior year at UCLA,

(37:26):
I was in a fraternity with mostly wealthy Jewish kids
from the valley, and there were five or six of
us out of one hundred and twenty guys, and everybody
in who we were. We didn't have any money. We're
always laying on our house bills. Everyone knew, oh, those
are the poor kids, right. And one summer we all
lived in the same apartment building and we gamified saving money,

(37:47):
and we had a whiteboard and we literally made a
game out of it. In the summer of nineteen eighty five,
I survived for twelve weeks on seventy eight bucks a
week including rent, because if I didn't save three thousand
bucks by the fall, I wasn't going back for my
senior year and college because I didn't have wealthy parents.
And if you can gamify saving money with a partner,
especially a romantic partner, that you can be totally transparent

(38:08):
with God. That's powerful. We're building something. We're gonna save
a ton of money. Can we save five or seven
thousand bucks this year together? And it's gonna be eight
thousand next year, and then it's gonna be nine and
with compounding and five or six years, which will go
really fast. We have sixty eighty one hundred grand and

(38:28):
having kids is I think the most rewarding thing it
has been for me was I didn't plan to have kids,
but it was having kids with someone else and raising
what feel like pretty good citizens. But a close second
was building economic security with someone else. We had total alignment. Right,
We're gonna save We were transparent around our expenses. We

(38:50):
were generous with each other. Oh no, you should do that.
There's a very unhealthy dynamic sometimes in relationships, and this
is sexist, but I found it to be true where
the dude uses money to control his spouse and the
spouse turns it into a game of how much money
she can spend without him knowing. And fortunately that's getting

(39:11):
flipped a little bit, or it's equalizing because women are
doing so well. Women under the age of thirty are
making more money, and urban centers. More single women own homes,
but they're still in my generation. This very weird dynamic
between the sexes and money. But going back to your
original question, talk about it, understand it. If you want
to be good at it, you got to get literate

(39:33):
at it, and you want to bring it up with
your friends and you can start learning. I spend four
hours a week probably talking to other people about my
economic well being, what tag loop holes there are where
I should be investing. I have a lot of real
estate when interest rates come down, At what point do
interest rates get low enough where I should be pulling
a second out and putting it in the market, knowing

(39:55):
if I have a ten year mortgage, over ten years,
the market's usually up about seven nine percent a year.
Does that make sense right? Think about it all the time.
You're the average of your five friends. You've seen that study,
body mass, politics, sports teams. But what's more interesting is
one of those five people will be more economically secure,

(40:15):
much more economically secure than the other four, despite not
making a lot more money. You want to know those
behaviors and those characteristics, and you want to model that person.
But this is something we all need to be more
open about it doesn't make you less of a man.
You're not supposed to have a lot of money when
you're young. Everybody screws up. I've been broke twice in

(40:35):
my forties. I was broke and that was really I
was too ashamed to admit that to anybody else. It
was like, well, you're supposed to be smart and great
at what you do, right, So I think being a
little bit more vulnerable, being open about it and getting
tips and you know, kind of kind of rules of
the road from other people talk about it.

Speaker 1 (40:55):
Yeah. One of the studies I looked at and you
just broke brought up here was that in twenty twenty four,
eighty eight percent of couples reported financial problems as the
cause for divorce. And it's what you talked about there,
of being able to talk to your partner about money.
What's a healthy way to bring up the subject, to
connect with someone about it, because, as you said, sometimes

(41:17):
in the early dating phases, it's really uncomfortable to talk
about it because people feel you're a gold digger. People
feel that you're just after their money. People are concerned
that they don't have enough of it to talk about it.
But if you're actually getting into a committed relationship. How
do we start having healthy and effective conversations about money.

Speaker 2 (41:34):
I would say transparency and a budget. You know, we
kind of all have that one that sort of got away.
I was deeply in love with this woman who was
in her residency to be a surgeon, and I was
very serious about her, and so I said, look, this
is what I have, and I kind of went through
my assets, how I plan to make money, what money
I had, where I lost money, where I'd made money,

(41:55):
And then she was very transparent and said, well, you know,
my parents are wealthy, so when they passed, I'll get
some money, but right now I'll have is a ton
of debt. And I think it made us feel really
much closer to each other, that kind of transparency. So
one I would say it's transparency, and I would say
it's regular check ins and a budget. I think what
really screws up relationships is not financial mishaps. It surprises. Oh,

(42:19):
you've been day trading and you've been going into some
stock that your buddy at work said was good, and
you lost. You lost twenty percent of our savings. But
it happened a year ago, and you're telling me now.
So I think it's a good idea on a regular
basis not only sit down and talk about budget, but
just say this is what's going on with us financially

(42:40):
and go through kind of spending and just being very
transparent with each other and also, you know, not hiding
the ball, right. I think that sometimes people don't want
to talk about a financial hit they've taken. Like I said,
I think the thing that screws up marriages is not
is not only financial stress, but it surprises about financial stress. Jesus,

(43:02):
you've been spending this much money on this and you
were trying to hide it from me. We lost thirty
percent of our savings in this one stock and you
didn't like. I check in with my partner and I say,
this is this is where we are, this is what
I'm thinking. I don't make a big investment without running
it by her first. She always says yes, but I
want her to know because that way when it if

(43:24):
it doesn't go well, it was our it's our problem,
it's our fault. So transparency talking about it and a
budget that you review together. Yeah.

Speaker 1 (43:34):
Yeah, and that's that's great advice. And I think that
transparency point is so huge because you're so right. Surprises
in any way in relationships the biggest trust breaker, and
you're so right that it's it's not even that that
person had an issue with what you were doing, it's
why you didn't tell them. That's what really breaks it down.

(43:55):
You talk a lot about investing and focusing on your talents,
not your passions. Yeah, I think for a long time
we've kept hearing this language around find your passion, follow
your passion, chase your passion, and yours is well no talent,
talent talent A lot of First of all, let's talk
about why talents over passions? And second of all, a
lot of what I hear is, Jay, I don't even
know what my passion's are and I don't know what

(44:16):
my talents are.

Speaker 2 (44:17):
Yeah, where do I go? So?

Speaker 1 (44:20):
First thing, why talents over passions? And second what do
I do if I don't know what my talents are? Yeah?

Speaker 2 (44:24):
We get two types of speakers at NYU, really accomplished
impressive people and billionaires. We've just decided, once you have
three comments around your net worth, you have insight into life.
And they always end their speech, or most of the
time end their speech with the following advice, which I
think is just terrible advice for young people. Follow your passion.
First off, recognize the majority of people telling you to
follow your passion are already rich and they made their

(44:48):
billions in iron ore smelting. This is your job. Your
job is to find your talent such that you could
be in the top ten percent within ten years and
then maybe in the top one percent in fifteen or
twenty years. And this is the hard part, or the
important part in an industry that has a ninety plus
percent employment rate, which by the way, is ninety plus

(45:09):
percent of industries. Young people's passions are often conflated with
their hobbies. I would have liked to have been quarterback
for the Jets. I have a pretty decent arm, a
good plane, good Field Division sixty three one ninety. I
thought it was out of central casting to be the
quarterback for the Jets. Once I got to UCLA, I
was fortunate to know this is what real athletes look like,

(45:31):
and you're not one of them. So the majority of
people don't end up and what the quote unquote their
passion is, because what they realize is that's a hobby.
Art DJ modeling, athletics, nightlife, you know, designing a jewelry line.
The passion industries attract so much human capital that it

(45:52):
drives down the return on your human capital. There are
one hundred and eighty thousand actors and actresses in Sagaftra.
These are the most talent creatives in the world, and
it's not easy to get a union card. Last year,
eighty three percent of them didn't qualify for health insurance
because they didn't make twenty three thousand dollars. So recognize
that if you're able to find something you're really good

(46:13):
at and it's in an industry with the ninety plus
employment rate, this is what's going to happen. Passion comes
from mastery and the economic accouterments of mastery of an industry.
Now no one grows up thinking I'd like to be
I'm passionate about tax law. But if you have the
skills and the discipline to get a lot degree and

(46:35):
you understand the intersection between the law and economics, and
you know how to handle clients, the best tax lawyers
fly private and have a larger selection set of mates
than they deserve. In the top ten or twenty percent
to have those sorts of accouterments. In a vanity industry,
you have to be in the point one percent. So

(46:55):
I don't want to crush anyone's dreams if you want
to be a DJ or you want to be an athlete,
but ring fence it and say, unless I get flashing
green lights that I'm definitely in the top one percent.
And you'll know if you're the next messy people are
going to tell you. You'll know if all of a sudden
you start getting invited to Vegas to DJ and people
are willing to pay you to DJ, you'll know. You'll

(47:15):
know pretty fast. But if you don't get those green
lines saying you're going to be in the one percent
really fast, maybe workshops something else that's not in the
romance industry and try and become good, slash great at it.
The guy who's installing my soapstone counter is the kind
of the marble guy or the granite guy in Marlebone.
This is a racky immigrant. We got to know each other.

(47:37):
He told me about what he does. Knows everything about marble,
knows everything about it, goes to the quarries, can talk
about the veining and everything. Immigrated from Iraq about eighteen
years ago. Started working for a guy got super into it.
He makes two point three million pounds a year top line.
He himself makes eight hundred thousand pounds a year as
the soapstone marble guy. And he's become passionate about it.

(48:02):
The relevance, the accouterments, the economic security. And this is
what you become passionate about. Jay. You become passionate about
ten carre of kids, You become passionate about helping your
parents out, You become passionate about taking really nice vacations
with your partner. Anything that provides you with that stuff,
you're going to become passionate about. So what I would
suggest is passion comes from mastery, artisanship, ninja like command

(48:27):
of something, and also something that provides you with the
economic security. Then a capitalist society affords you an amazing life.
So find your talent. That's your job. If you're good
at something, you can become great at it in an
industry with a high employment rate. Trust me, Trust me,
you're going to find passion.

Speaker 1 (48:44):
And for those people who are sitting there going well,
I don't know what I'm talented at, Like I don't
even know what my talent is. I don't really have
anything that anyone's have a validated notice, recognized them pretty
average everything. Where did they stop?

Speaker 2 (48:57):
I think you want to build a kitchen cabinet of
people who you can see down at any job. First off,
don't let perfect be the enemy of good. Just start.
When I was eighteen, I thought I was going to
be a pediatrician. Chemistry disallowed me that thought. It was
going to be an athlete. When I was fifteen, UCLA
disallowed me of that thought. I was going to be
investment banker. At twenty two disabused me of that thought.
I was going to be a healthcare consultant. When I

(49:19):
was in business school, and then I thought I don't
know if I'd be any good at this. I ended
up in strategy and then analytics. I didn't know what
strategy and analytics were. So try stuff. Be honest with yourself.
If don't give up at the first time, if I
don't like it, well that just might be work. But
you'll start to get feedback on what you're good at
and what you're not good at, and workshop. But keep investing.

(49:42):
Recognize it's hard to be great at anything, but you'll
probably get a feel I mean at some point you
recognized you're a good storyteller, you have a nice voice,
you're good at this, right, And I imagine there was
some things along the way you recognize, I'm not that
good at this. I'm trying hard, and I'm not that good.
I tried really hard to be a good investment banker.
I had no natural skills at it. I just wasn't

(50:03):
good at it. And then when I got into consulting
and I took data and could frame it into a
story where CEOs and cmos would listen to me and say,
you know, bring in that. I started a strategy form
called profit bringing them see what they think. I'm like, Wow,
we're good at this, maybe even we can them great
at it. So another again, group of kitchen cabinet, people
who can talk to you, people who can advise you.

(50:27):
Get started workshop. Okay, it's not the perfect job. I'm
not sure I'll be passionate about it. No, no, no,
if you can find something better, great. Until then, get
in the game, see what the opportunities are, and you'll
start getting market feedback on what you're good at or
not good at, and you'll start to click in, Wow,
I really I'm pretty good at this and ask people
around you ask for reviews. The compensation I think I

(50:51):
provide my younger employees with. I'd like to think I'm
good at this. Maybe I could be better as I
talk about it. It's not only monetary. What young people
need is feedback. If you are in a position as
a boss to say, you know what, you're great with
new employees. You make them feel welcome. Well, should I
consider a career in recruiting or HR? You're great with clients?

(51:13):
Jesus Christ, can you sell? You like to drink? You're
ridiculously obnoxious in a funny way. People want to go
out with you when they're in town. Boss, you should
be in sales. You should be selling and you got
a decent iq. You should be selling database software for
Oracle or CRM software for Salesforce, because you're going to
make a half a million bucks by the time you're thirty.
Taking people out in establishing relationships, get feedback, workshop stuff,

(51:38):
but you'll start to absorb stuff. But you're never going
to find out you're good at cricket unless you pick
up them out. You know you're just not going to
find out, So try as many things as possible. Surround
yourself with people and give you an honest feedback, and
keep workshopping stuff. Don't be afraid, don't you know, again,
forgive yourself. If you're not a good investment banker, you're
not cut out to be a doctor, you're not going

(51:58):
to be an athlete. That's it's okay, it's out there.
Just keep showing up, keep showing up, keep trying, and
you will hopefully find that thing. I don't want to
say it's a guarantee. I think some people never find
anything they're great at. But in this economy, you should
be able to find something you're at least good at.

Speaker 1 (52:16):
Yeah. I appreciate what you were sharing about the diverse
roles you've had and again your mantra forgive yourself. And
I look back at life as thinking that it would
be about finding or discovering the thing, and I realized
it was so much more about collecting and connecting.

Speaker 2 (52:34):
That's right, right.

Speaker 1 (52:34):
It was like collecting ideas, collecting skills, and then at
one point they all seem to connect. Even though you know,
in the famous words of Steve Jobs, you can't connect
the dots looking forward, you and you can looking backwards.
And so now when I look back at my life,
I'm like, oh, yeah, I remember doing work experience when
I was like fifteen years old and I was told
to cold call three hundred companies and I had no

(52:56):
idea what a cold call was or what we were selling.
I was trained to do it, and it gave me
an amazing experience to deal with rejection. And out of
the three hundred companies I called, I think two hundred
and ninety seven said no, but the three that said
yes just gave me this exhilarating feeling. And then I
worked at Morrison's stacking shelves and doing extra database management

(53:19):
work in the warehouse, and I remember what overtime felt like,
and I knew I got paid one point five times
as much when I worked at Extra, and I was like, oh, okay,
that's what overtime feels like. And then I remember working
in retail and I knew if I could sell a
card to the customer to collect points, then I would
get ten pounds extra on every card. And it was
just fascinating to me that all of those experiences. And

(53:42):
then I worked as a consultant at Accenture too, and
again I don't think I was that great a consultant
by their definition. Even though I did very well inside
the organization, I picked up so many skills when it
came to negotiation, presentation, deck building, understanding the needs, interesting
concerns of our clients and what they were trying to achieve.
And none of that was my purpose. Yeah, and none

(54:06):
of that was my field of excellence. I was not
great to any of those things, but all of those
skills have become so valuable today.

Speaker 2 (54:15):
I love the way you say that, because when I
look back on investment banking, it wasn't a failed experiment
because it had taught me attention to detail. It taught
me to get up early and put on a tie.
It taught me sort of how to read a room.
It taught me how to write a proposal. It taught
me a little bit about the credit markets because I
was in fixed income. What you said about being in
the services industry are working jobs at Morrisons. That is

(54:38):
really important because it gives you a sense. For one,
no one owes you a living, showing up work and hard,
getting along with people, developing a sense of grit. The
job you were talking about, the sales job. I think
everyone should be in a job where they endure it.
They deal with the public because they realize that a
lot of people aren't nice and you have to navigate that,
or they're just not having a bad day where there's

(55:00):
not having a good day. But also, and this is
the key to my success, is my ability to endure rejection.
You know, if you want to score above your weight
class economically, a romantically, get out a big spoon and
get ready to eat shit. Because I applied to nine
business schools, I got into two. I have. In high school,

(55:23):
I ran for sophomore, junior, and senior class president. I
lost all three times, and based on my track record,
I decided to run for student body president, where I
went on to wait for it, lose. I have had
a lot of women tell me they're not interested in
dating me. I have sent out thousands of emails to
potential clients for my strategy firm. I have pitched hundreds

(55:44):
of venture capitalists on my way to raising money. And
the reason why I am wealthier than your average bear
and get to spend my life with someone who, on
a risk adjusted scorecard, is exceptionally higher character and much
more attractive than me, is because I was never afraid
to endure rejection. I always had the ability to endure

(56:08):
rejection more and move on. So if you aren't willing
to endure rejection, if you aren't willing to take those
types of risks. My current partner I met at the
Raleigh Hotel in South Beach. She was there with a
friend and another guy, and I promised myself I was
going to speak to her. I was very drawn to her.
Before I left, went out to get my car at
the valet, got angry at myself, went back, walked right

(56:30):
up to them and said, Hi, I'm Scott. Where are
you guys from? And now our oldest son's middle name
is Raleigh. You gotta be willing to endure rejection. And
here's the thing most people aren't. Most people will never
invest in their own company. They're too scared to lose money.
Most people will not go up and speak to a stranger.
This is something I forced my boys to do when
we're out. I'm like, you gotta speak to at least

(56:50):
one stranger. My oldest one has no problem with that.
My youngest has a little bit more of a difficult time.
But the ability to open, the ability to call somebody
when you were calling don't call me again. So what
I think you're saying is I should check back in
two weeks, right, I mean, I can't imagine how much
shit you must have eaten started a podcast, right, I mean,
it's not I got to start one with a co

(57:13):
host who already had a following. Here's some kid out
of accentsure starting a podcast, right, I mean it's just
a lot of rejection. Yeah.

Speaker 1 (57:20):
We sent personalized letters and videos to one hundred people
that we've really wanted on the show, and every single
one of them said no in year one, and over
the last five years, every single one of them have
been on the show, bar three maybe. And it just
showed me that there was such a need to just

(57:40):
be okay. I mean, I have a list of everyone
was asking me who's your ideal podcast guest? And I'm
a big soccer fan. We were talking about football earlier
and I've supported Manchester Nights since I was a kid
in Christiano Ronaldo is my go And you know, I
have a list of a history of dms to Christiano
Ronaldo that he has never seen lear and responded to,

(58:01):
and I can't wait for the day he sees them.

Speaker 2 (58:03):
You're just following the wrong club Ukaya Soker or Cole Palmer.
I think they would come up this show you gotta
go Arsenal or Chelsea. That's your fault.

Speaker 1 (58:11):
Yeah, that's my fault. That's my fault. It's the pain.
I'm asking for the pain. But no, I couldn't agree
with you more. And I love this mantra that you
keep repeating forgive yourself, and it's such a powerful one.
And you are going to make mistakes, you are going
to break things, you are going to get wrong. Maybe
even one of those clients is never going to want
to work with you again, and that's all going to happen.

(58:32):
And I think we live in this protective space of like,
I never want to get anything wrong. I never want
that person to ever say, oh I was too pushy
or too nudgy. And it's like, well they might and
they probably will anyway, someone will. And is that worth
letting go of this amazing life that you envision and

(58:54):
what you want to create.

Speaker 2 (58:56):
The only thing you can or the only thing I
feel like I can guarantee, is a certain amount of
joy and a certain amount of tragedy in their life.
And the ratio of the two is a function of
a lot of things, mostly when and where you're born.
But what you want to do is try and set
yourself up for so many deep and meaningful relationships that
those ratios of joy to tragedy or are much greater.

(59:17):
So forgive yourself. But there's some great research. My colleague
at NYU Adam Altru as a joint appointment at the
business school and at the in the psychology department, He's
done a ton of great research on end of life.
He goes into palliative care facilities and he interviews people
on their biggest regrets, and people get a lot of
perspective at the end. They're never going to walk on

(59:39):
the beach again. They're never going to hang out with
their you know, really spend time with their loved ones.
They're never going to work again, never go to go
to a sporting match, what have you. Never you know,
take their dogs for a walk again. So they don't
have a lot to lose a lot of perspective, and
their biggest regrets kind of come down to three things
in reverse order. Number three, they wish they spend more

(01:00:01):
time with their friends. Number two, they wish they'd led
the life they wanted to lead, not the life their
church or their family wanted to lead, or society was
telling them to actsert in a way. But their number
one regret is they wish they'd been less hard on themselves.
They wish they'd been kinder than themselves. Because when you
look back on your failures, made a bad investment, this

(01:00:22):
person didn't love me back as much as I love them.
I got fired, I had a business fail. When you
look back at the end and you have real perspective,
you're going to be more upset about the way you
responded than what actually happened to you. Life isn't about
what happens to you. It's about how you respond to

(01:00:43):
what happens to you. And recognize that emotion, the present
value of emotion is enormous. In the moment your disappointment,
you're going to look back and think, the only you're
gonna be upset about is how upset you were at it.
On the flip side, when things are going really well,
all also recognize a lot of that is in your fault.

(01:01:04):
You got lucky. You're in the right place at the
right time. You had someone take an interest in you
and work and promote you. You had a stock skyrocket.
Are you a great investor? No, you're lucky, and you're
never more prone to a big mistake professionally or personally
than after a big win, because you start believing it's
you and the time when you have a great investment,

(01:01:27):
you have great relationships. What you want to do is
try and pull in your horns a little bit and
be a little bit humble and as grateful as you
can be, recognizing luck has been on your side. And
like I said, if you want to lose a lot
of money, start believing that your great year in the
market is because you're just really good at investing and
you should lever up because you're that smart. No, you're

(01:01:49):
sticking your chin out.

Speaker 1 (01:01:51):
I love that advice, especially the humility part, and it's
so interesting. Yeah, I remember reading a study that said
that most founders who exit, they make their worst startup
investments for the next two years that follows or exit.
And it's that same feeling if you start thinking it's you,
I wanted to ask you. A lot of people right
now are trying to decide between whether they double down

(01:02:12):
on their career at the company they're at or the
organization they're at, or have multiple revenue streams or side
hustles and things on the side, How would you encourage
people to evaluate where they put their efforts.

Speaker 2 (01:02:24):
So another thing I've gotten shited on TikTok or i
hate side hustles. So if you're in a side hustle,
that means a side hustle is a temporary means of
investigating something else should become your main hustle. The way
you get wealthy and economic security is you find a
professional activity that you're good at, that you become great at,
and you go all in on it. Because the difference
success is in the last ten percent. So the guy

(01:02:46):
or gal that applies ninety percent versus the guy or
gal that applies one hundred percent, the latter is going
to get promoted faster, get options, awards, just make more money,
have recruiters calling them success is that extra oomph. If
you're doing a lot of side hustles, it's very, very
difficult to be great at your main hustle. So fine,
if you don't like your main hustle, but you need

(01:03:07):
it for health insurance, you need it for a base,
and you want to investigate other stuff, but recognize the
only way you're going to build real wealth and economic
security is to go all in on one thing, and
I've never been successful. I have two kind of let's
say complexions professionally. The first is I have balance. I'm
working forty hours a week, decent lifestyle that for me

(01:03:29):
is called losing money. I've never been able to aggregate
wealth kind of having balance in my life. And then
there's a point in my life and I'm not proud
of this, but especially in my earliers, where stressed out,
working all the time, heard on my fitness, hard on
my relationships. That's when I'm usually making money. The marketplace

(01:03:50):
is competitive, it demands a tremendous amount of you, but
it's just it's I think it's more or less say hey,
how do I have a sober conversation with myself? How
do I get forward fast? The best companies in the world,
I find are the most aspirational companies are the ones
that let you go flat out, that say to you,
Accentri says to you the following, go flat out here,

(01:04:13):
go just I mean, okay, have a hobby, have a relationship, fine,
but go flat out here and we're going to give
you your parents' life at the age of thirty or
thirty five. Those are generally the best companies in the world.
Some people decide they don't want that and they want
to do something they're excited about, fine or passionate about.
I get it. But if you're that guy or gal

(01:04:33):
with three or four different side hustles, you aren't going
to be wealthy. That's a temporary means of finding your
main hustle. That means your main hustle isn't working. But
one hundred and ten percent on anyone, you know, Bill
Gates didn't have a side hustle, My Angelou didn't have
a side hustle. Maybe they needed a maybe my Angelu
needed a side job to pay for But at some
point you went all in on poetry and writing and oration.

(01:04:58):
That is greatness focus.

Speaker 1 (01:05:01):
Yeah, I think that's such a great reminder. And I
remember looking at something a few years back which was saying,
if someone was going to invest, let's say me and
you were going to invest one hundred hours into someone's development,
how would they split it between what they're good at,
what they're average at, and what they're bad at. And
the majority of people will say thirty thirty thirty, right,
like thirty three, thirty three, thirty three, and some people

(01:05:23):
will say, oh, well, maybe I'll put twenty into what
i'm good at, twenty into what I'm bad at, and
then the rest into what i'm average at, sixty in
the middle, and going back to your point, the most
successful people in the world will say one hundred zero
zero or eighty ten ten because they know that if
they invest that much energy in something they're bad at,

(01:05:43):
they'll only ever be average at it, And if they
invest in something they're average out, they'll only ever be
okay at it. But if you invest in what you're
good at, you will become great. And I think we've lost, well,
not lost, I don't think we've ever had that focus
because you graduate at twenty one, you know, from a
regular degree, and then you never think you have to
learn again. I think there is a sense if we

(01:06:04):
don't realize what good to great looks like, because you
never ever have to grow again according to the way
the education system set up in the belief system, at least,
what have you noticed about people who in an organization,
in a company go all right, I'm going to be
great here. What do they do differently? What do they
build mindset wise and also physically.

Speaker 2 (01:06:26):
So we had at L two, which is the business
intelligence firm US sold twenty seventeen. We tracked everyone in
a lot of data and we found so and this
isn't the hallmark version of HR, but I found generally speaking,
you have five or ten employees that at one hundred
and twenty percent of the value and everyone else is
negative twenty. That's not to say they're not important, but

(01:06:47):
they require a lot of management, a lot of attention.
They're good, not great. You can't just scale with great
players because great people know they're great, and they demand
a lot of equity and compensation. But when we identified
that quote that a dozen superstars, we said, what do
these people have in common? And the three things we
found in common were one, they had gone to elite

(01:07:09):
universities and I hate saying that, but they had generally
gone to really fantastic schools. Two, they had athletics in
their background, competitive athletics. And three and I didn't write
this down anywhere, they were almost always women. So a
female from Yale who was on who was a gymnast

(01:07:30):
there or a diver that was not amount of her.
I'm not saying we didn't hire someone unless you had sports,
but we generally looked for people at two of the three.
We also hired men, but those were the three things.
We found. People who had had some sort of competitive
sport in the background, or had come from enough adversity
that they had to show a certain amount of grit
and willingness to break through hard things. People who who

(01:07:52):
had pushed themselves really hard. You know. I wrote Crew
in college, and crew is basically who was willing to
endure more pain? And when I have my first job
at Morgan Stanley, I realized I wasn't as skilled. I
did poorly academically and I wasn't as skilled as my peers.
So I thought, Okay, what can I control? Every Tuesday morning,

(01:08:14):
I'd come into work at nine am and I wouldn't
leave till Wednesday night at five or six pm. I
was twenty three, I was super fit, super strong. I
didn't have a relationship, I didn't have dogs. I'm like, yeah,
I can work thirty six hours straight and I could
control that. And now is that healthy? Do you want
to be doing that when you're thirty three or forty three,
when you have kids? Know? But I could do that

(01:08:34):
when I was young, that grit, that perseverance. So I
look for people who have overcome obstacles, and also you
want them to act like owners, and you'll get a
sense for that. And that's why kind of the Silicon
Valley mentality has worked in the sense that they give
everyone equity, but people and you notice it. People who
see a wrapper on the ground and they pick it up.

(01:08:58):
People who are thinking about clients, people are trying to
sell stuff, people who are at a social event and
know someone who's good and recruit that person and then
come up and say, Jay, this guy's the best video
editor in the world, and he's just world clad. He's
a great athlete. I don't care what we put him
to work on. She's just going to be amazing. People
who act like owners, and then when you identify those people,

(01:09:19):
your job as a manager is to sit them down
and say, Okay, this is my path for you. I've
started a business intelligence firm. I'm very capitalist about it.
I used to sit these twelve people down and say
the following I've started this business intelligence firm. I'm going
to build it to twenty million in revenues. These firms
go for between six and ten times revenues. That's somewhere
between one hundred and twenty and two hundred million. I'm

(01:09:39):
giving you one percent of the company. You're going to
be here four years. You're going to work your ass
off between if we have this liquidity event, you're going
to be make between a half a million and two
million a year in equity. Don't go anywhere. If I
do well, you're going to do well. And I would
literally try and paint that accurate a picture. I wanted
to make sure that the twelve best people are the
kind of the top were sort of nailed to the floor.

(01:10:01):
They just couldn't leave. They're like, oh, this is like
I can't this. The opportunity here is just too too good.
But in a bit of a word's out. They demonstrate grit,
they act like owners and also generally speaking, want to
help other people. Good culture carriers. You know, there are
some people that are so good then they're competitive. I've

(01:10:23):
had a little bit companies that are sort of the
island of misfit toys, people who are unusual or some
quite frankly sometimes have some mental health issues. I'm like, yeah,
if they had it all, they'd be a Google We're
going to figure it out for them because they're that talented,
but act like owners, good to other people, and have
demonstrated something in their background that shows grit.

Speaker 1 (01:10:43):
Yeah, yeah, I love those. It took me a while
as I was developing my team, and I really feel
like the people I have right now embody a lot
of those characteristics that you mentioning, and I had to
grow as a leader in order to attract those individuals too.
And it wasn't something that it was like, oh, you're
just not finding the right peace people. There was work
I had to do in who I had to become,

(01:11:04):
not just characterized, but quality and ability wise in order
to attract that and also being able to nurture that
effectively as well. And so I think as much as
so much of what we've been sharing today is about
the person who's trying to work their way up, so
much of this is for leaders as well in order
to how to adapt and be different. I wanted to
Scott focus on what you were mentioning a couple of
moments ago about the palliative care and you know, people

(01:11:28):
coming to the end of their life, and you know
a lot of people do feel at the end of
their life. I wish it didn't work that hard, you know,
I shouldn't have put too much energy into work. And
almost sometimes I feel like that's a really easy thing
to say at that time because it almost doesn't matter anymore,
whereas when you're living it kind of does matter. It
comes back to what you said earlier. I remember saying

(01:11:49):
to myself, and it goes back to what was that
language you used by having a sober and conversation with
your own sober conversation with yourself. I remember many sober
conversations with myself, and one of them was like, I
can eat feel like I'll have the myth of balance
for the next ten years, or I can work my
absolute socks off for the next three years and then

(01:12:09):
be able to make more sense of everything. And I
chose the latter one, and that three years probably look
like more like six years or whatever it was. But
that sober conversation was so powerful for me because I
had to give up that myth of this perfect balance.
And you've kind of alluded to that in a lot
of this conversation. Today, someone could be listening to both

(01:12:31):
of us and just be like, yeah, well, I don't
want to be that successful. I don't want to be
that competitive. I don't want it to be that way.
I just want to have a good life. I want
to have a simple life. How does that work with
your philosophy and thoughts?

Speaker 2 (01:12:44):
Look, this is my way, it's not the right way.
With the advice I'm giving is there's some proximity bias.
I teach it an elite business school. And when I
survey these kids and I asked them what they expect
me making in five to ten years, they all expect
me in the top eighty percent of them, expecting me
the top one percent of income earning households by the
time of thirty five. I'm like, Okay, unless you're a

(01:13:06):
genius and crazy talented, you're just gonna have to work
your ass off. And then when they use words like balance,
I'm like, come on now. Having said that, some people
don't want to live to work, they want to work
to live. That's fine, God love you. Some people say,
and I get these people on my podcast, got or
they call in I just want to be a good citizen,
work a decent amount, have a good relationship with my spouse,

(01:13:29):
and coach little league, and have a nice life and
be an active member of my church. I'm like, great,
you can do that in America. That's not going to
work in La or New York or I mean, you
got to move to a lower cost neighborhood. And there's
nothing wrong with that. There's a lot of really happy people.

Speaker 1 (01:13:44):
Know.

Speaker 2 (01:13:44):
The average household income now is sixty eight or seventy
grand and I bet a lot of those households are
very happy. They find strength and reward other places. That's
absolutely there's nothing wrong with that. The majority of the
young people I speak to to be making a lot
of money or so, you know, I don't need to

(01:14:05):
make a ton of money. I just want to live
in New York, have a nice place, be able to
have a couple of kids. I'm like, okay, that's a
million bucks a year. I'm not talking about the way
the world should be. I'm talking about the way the
world is. And if you expect to live in an
American city and be able to send your kids, you know,
ensure you can absorb a health shock, give your kids
the kind of life you want, take nice vacations. It's

(01:14:28):
just a lot of money. The reality is, it's just
a crazy amount of money. And you can control. You
want to lowyer burn, move to a place for the
lower cost of housing, lower cost of living, more power
to you. But the majority of the people I know
in their twenties and thirties, and again this is proximity bias,
because the people I hang out with expect to have
a lot of influence and a lot of economic security.

(01:14:51):
And we all know that guy or gal who is
in great shape, great relationship with their parents. It just
seems to rain money on them as fit as a
food blog donates time at the ASPCA. Assume you are
not that person, right, Assume that you probably have to
go all in on something if you wanna, I mean,

(01:15:11):
la living in New York. You're just going to have
to be relatively successful to stay here. You don't have
a birthright to live in Los Angeles or New York
or London. And again it comes back to that sober conversation,
are you really willing to make the trade offs? If not,
you can be happy in Lubbock, Texas. Most people can,

(01:15:33):
and maybe you should be thinking about that that these
people who expect to have a reasonable life in these
big cities. Okay, let's be honest about what that's going
to take.

Speaker 1 (01:15:41):
Scott, thank you for being so transparent and honest today.
This has been so useful, insightful, and I really appreciate
your candor and honesty with so much of this because
I think you are right that we can have really
unhealthy false expectations and they can be reaffirmed and we
can be on a wild goose chase for the rest
of our lives, or we can get what you're doing,

(01:16:03):
which is just straight talking, really simple, insightful advice that
hopefully gets people having that sobering, honest conversation with themselves.
It's really refreshing. I think that it's very exciting to
tell people to go chase stuff and do things, and
then helping people actually self reflect and figure out whether

(01:16:24):
they're ready for that and what that means and what
that looks like is so important. And I wanted to
we end every episode of On Purpose with a final five,
and these questions have to be answered in one word
to one sentence maximum, although I will probably break my
own rule, so Scott Galloway, these are your final five.
The first question is what is the best wealth advice

(01:16:48):
you've ever heard.

Speaker 2 (01:16:48):
Or received or given find your talent?

Speaker 1 (01:16:52):
Second question, what is the worst wealth advice you've ever
heard or received?

Speaker 2 (01:16:56):
Follow your passion?

Speaker 1 (01:16:58):
Question number three, how would you define your current purpose.

Speaker 2 (01:17:01):
To raise loving, patriotic men beautiful?

Speaker 1 (01:17:07):
Question number four? Is it possible or how is it possible?
To create peace with money?

Speaker 2 (01:17:15):
Money is the means. The ends is deep and meaningful relationships,
and money should just provide an absence from the stress
that can get in the way of forming and nourishing
deep and meaningful relationships. It's the means, not the ends.

Speaker 1 (01:17:32):
I want to unpack the last two answers because I
think there's some really interesting material there. So it's so strange,
isn't it. So I'm sure you've heard this story that.
I mean, it's been told for years about the fishermen
and the businessman. Yeah, yeah, right, You've heard the story
a million times. It's like the fisherman goes to the businessman,

(01:17:52):
and the businessman looks at the fishermen and goes, what
do you do all day? And the fisherman says, well,
you know, in the morning, I go fishing, and then
the afternoon I have a c st end and I
hang out with my family and my friends, and I
drink a little and then I go to sleep and
do it all over again, and the businessman saying, like,
that's what I want to get to. It's just that
I build this business and then sold in did this
and now I'm trying to come around like it's a

(01:18:13):
cute story, but in reality it's I don't know whether
it stacks up. But there's this idea that people have
that if I just want to spend time with people,
why would I work so hard? But you just said, actually,
sometimes if you don't have money, it can actually block
our relationships. In what ways does scarcity or a lack
of financial wealth create issues in our relationships?

Speaker 2 (01:18:36):
Well, one, if you're a man, women aren't going to
be that attracted to you. Women are attracted to men
for three reasons. Number three kindness, Number two intellect, and
the fastest way to communicate intellect is humor. But the
number one source of attractiveness and men is the ability
to signal resources. You don't even have to have resource point,
but you have to demonstrate a plan that you're smart,

(01:18:58):
you're hard working, and you have a plan. But there,
let me ask you a question. Do you have a
number where you're like, Okay, this is my number and
that's when i'm That's when I'm aiming towards. Okay, So
I did have a number, and I actually think it's
sort of healthy because what I became addicted to was
relevance and money. And when I sold my last company,

(01:19:21):
I sold my last company for one hundred and sixty
million bucks, and I thought, I'm going to go raise
three to four hundred million dollars, start a private equity fund,
raise funds two and three. I have the contacts. I'm
in the sweet spot because I'd like to be a billionaire.
Scott Gallery billionaire just had a nice ring to it
for me. And then I had a friend passed away
at a very young age, and it kind of sent

(01:19:42):
me into a little bit of introspection and I thought,
all right, I've hit my number. Unless I really screw
up again. If I get four to six percent on
the money I have, I can live the life I want.
And I'm like, well, okay, why do I need more money.
I'm on this hamster where I've decided my worth as
a man is a function of having more in what

(01:20:06):
you realize, and it's hard to get off this hamster wheel.
The money's just sinking your pen and it can help
you write new chapters. It can make certain chapters burn brighter,
but it's not your story. And this is a really
good problem to have. But I think we have a
virus in this nation amongst the super wealthy of hoarding
money where they decide to keep. They want more money,

(01:20:26):
they want more money. I don't. What Daniel Kahneman, the
economic historian, teaches us is that above a certain amount,
you get no incremental game for money. You don't get less.
Billionaires are no less happy than millionaires, but they're no happier.
And what I've decided is once I hit my number,
you know, I love data. Every year I look at
how much money I made and I either spend it
all or I give it away. And I want to

(01:20:48):
be clear, I'm not a virtuous person. I love hanging
out of the Beverlys Hotel. I love taking my friends
to ask and I spend a shit. I spend money
like I'm a gangster in the fifties, just diagnosed with
ass cancer. I love spending money and if that sounds obnoxious,
it is. And then anything above that, I give it away.
And I don't do it to be a good person.
I do it because it makes me feel masculine, it

(01:21:09):
makes me feel patriotic, it makes me feel important, and
I just enjoyed. I didn't give away a dollar until
I was forty, and now I'm trying to catch up,
and I really enjoyed. It's almost like consumption for me.
But having a number is really powerful because you can
say what's required to get to that number, and then,
just as importantly, once you get to that number, get
off the hamster wheel. Because this is the fear, and

(01:21:32):
this is what I was headed towards. I'm an atheist.
I think at some point I'm going to look into
my kid's eyes and know that our relationship is coming
to an end. But it's empowering for me. It makes
me think about what I want at the end, and
what I was barreling towards was the following having a
lot of money, having a decent amount of influence, but
never having really been in the moment or have the

(01:21:53):
depth and meaning that I could have had amongst my partner,
my sons, and my friends. And that all of a sudden,
I thought, you know, when my friend passed, I thought,
at the end, you know, you could just tell his
relationships where everything the money meant fucking nothing. It was

(01:22:13):
all about the relationship. My thad. Okay, the money has
to be a means to the ends, and that is deep,
meaningful relationships. But be careful. It can turn into a
suicide pack. It can turn on you and you become
so focused on the affirmation of strangers, which I'm addicted to,
become addicted to money, that you spend way too much

(01:22:34):
time thinking about additional money, success, relevance, and it comes
to the cost of your relationships. I know so many
incredibly impressive, successful people who don't get along with their kids,
have a shitty relationship with their partner, and say, well,
what's the point of all this? So I think it's
healthy to have a number and then to be very disciplined.

(01:22:56):
Once I have that number, I'm going to enjoy the
money or I'm going to give it away. You don't
need to be a billionaire. You're not going to be
any happier.

Speaker 1 (01:23:04):
Beautiful answer. Before we go to the fifth and final question,
I want to unpack the answer from before about you
mentoring young men. I feel like a lot of young
men that I speak to, listen to read comments from,
hear from you. You see a lot of pressure. A
lot of men these days feel a lot of pressure
and a lot of stress, and some of them feel
left behind, forgotten, confused, this to their place in society

(01:23:27):
based on so many other things. At the same time,
you're coming at from the angle that they need to
take responsibility. There needs to be disciplined, there needs to
be accountability. How do you what would you say to
any young men who are listening right now, watching right now,
who feel a lot of pressure, who feel a lot
of stress, how would you address that?

Speaker 2 (01:23:47):
Well? First off, just the reality of the situation. Globally,
no group is ascended faster than women. In the last
thirty years. More women are seeking tertiary education globally now
than men. And when you look at some nations that
don't like women seeking a tertiarycagement, it really says something
three women graduating from college for every two over the
next five years. No group has fallen further faster in

(01:24:09):
America than young men four times is likely to kill themselves. Jay,
you're in a morgue with five people who have died
by suicide, four of them are men, three times more
likely to be addicted, twelve times more likely to be incarcerated.
We don't have a homeless problem. We have a male
homeless problem. We don't have an incarceration problem. We have
a male incarcerat We don't have an opioid epidemic. We

(01:24:29):
have a male opiate epidemic. A lot of the jobs
that they relied on with a lot of college education,
have been outsourced. The maturing later. There's a general sense
that there's a lack of empathy for young men. If
you had any special interest, gript killing themselves at four
times the rate is the control group, you'd move in
with programs. But because the advantage I received, my father received,

(01:24:50):
there's a lack of empathy. So the first is to
recognize I think that it is tough out there for
young men, and to forgive yourself what I tell young
men when I go back to the thing about the phone,
Start getting into fitness, to start making some money. And
the third thing we didn't talk about. You have to
get out of the house every day and be in

(01:25:11):
the company of strangers building something bigger than yourself. I
don't care if it's work, I don't care if it's church,
the sports league, a nonprofit. You have to be in
the company of strangers. Because here's the risk and what's
happening to young men. We have a new species developing
of human, specifically young men who are sequestering from society.
They're asocial, they're more prone to conspiracy theory, and they

(01:25:34):
are essentially becoming totally isolated, almost like a new form
of asexual homo sapien. And you can see how it's
happening because the most talented, well resourced people in the
world are trying to convince young men that they don't
need friends. They can go on Reddit or discord. They

(01:25:55):
don't need to put on a tie or go through
the rejection of interviewing. They can trade stocks or crypto
on Robinhood or on coinbase. They don't need to get
in shape, show humor, endure rejection, go out, have a plan,
shower for God's sakes, approach strange women, be persistent, show manners, affection,

(01:26:20):
follow up because you got you porn. So we have
a group of men who've been convinced they have can
have a reasonable fact simile of life on a screen
in an algorithm, and we're producing millions of these men.
How many women have you met or how many times
have you heard I know all these great women who
are attractive, high character, professionally shit together, and they can't

(01:26:42):
find men. No, they can, They just can't find any
men they want a date. One in three men under
the age of thirty has a girlfriend, two and three
women has a boyfriend. Why Because women are dating older
because they want someone who's more economically and emotionally viable.
So I really think this is a crisis. I think
there's variety things we need to do around education reform

(01:27:04):
that rewards more what I call boyish behavior and attributes.
I think we need more freshman seats at universities. I'd
like to see national service. I was just in Israel
at the Nova Festival Memorial. I talked to a battalion
of IDF soldiers one hundred and eighty like young, beautiful, strong,
thin people handling semiotic weapons, learning a skill in the

(01:27:27):
company of each other, learning, meeting mentors, meeting friends, meeting
makes some of the lowest levels of young adult depression
in a nation that has existential threats all around it.
And I think it's because they for two to three
years serving the agency of something bigger than themselves. I'd
love to see national service. We need to shove more
money in their pockets. Minimum wage of twenty five dollars
an hour, child tax credit, more housing so they can

(01:27:50):
afford a house, more vocational programming for men. Did would
metal and autoshop go? So there are a lot of
things we can do. But what I would tell the
young men is it, let's be honest, it's difficult out
there right now for you. Forgive yourself. It is hard
for you. You need to start making some money. You
need to get strong, and you need to start getting

(01:28:12):
out every day out of the house. Home is seven
hours a day, maybe eight for sleep. And you need
to take your strong, young, incredible person out and start
hunting lions, finding shit, making friends, finding mates and during rejection.
Because you are a strong young man and you can

(01:28:34):
handle it, but you need to get out of the house.
You need to get out of the house.

Speaker 1 (01:28:38):
Great advice, Great advice. Lovelet'score. Fifth and final question. If
you could create one law that everyone in the world
had to follow, what would it be.

Speaker 2 (01:28:48):
No economic policy can ever get in the way of love.
You can't have family law court that ends up where
dads one in three dads have no contact with their
kids in six years. All right, that We need to
reconfigure the law. We can't have people work forty hours
a week and be in poverty, Like, how can they
How can they be good dads right or good moms?

(01:29:08):
How can they have a loving relationship with their spouse
when they're in poverty working forty hours. Anything that gets
in the way of deep and meaningful relationships has to
be done away with or reconfigured. This is the whole
shooting match. None of this matters growth AI GDP growth.

(01:29:29):
None of it means a fucking thing If you can't
have deep and meaningful relationships. Anything that gets in the
way of that. The parent child relationship, stresses marriages, results
in teens engaging in self harm. We need new laws,
new laws. Nothing can get in the way of that.

Speaker 1 (01:29:48):
Scott Galloway Everyone in. The book is called The Algebra
of Wealth, a Simple Formula for financial security. The podcast
is called The prof g Podcast. Subscribe if you haven't already. Scott,
thank you for your work, honestly, thank you for thank
you taking the time to be here today. I hope
this is the first of many conversations. I really hope
I get to know you better and I appreciate it.
I can add you to my kitchen cabinet. I would

(01:30:10):
be true honor, and honestly I love the work you're doing.
I'm a big fan and if I can ever be
helpful and supportive in any way, then then I'm right here.
So please know that.

Speaker 2 (01:30:20):
I appreciate that. And congrats on all your success.

Speaker 1 (01:30:22):
Thank you so much, Thank you, Scott, Thank you so
much for listening to this conversation. If you enjoyed it,
you'll love my chat with Adam Grant on why discomfort
is the key to growth and the strategies for unlocking
your hidden potential. If you know you want to be
more and achieve more this year, go check it out
right now.

Speaker 3 (01:30:43):
You set a goal today, you achieve it in six months,
and then by the time it happens, it's almost a relief.
There's no sense of meaning and purpose. You sort of
expected it, and you would have been disappointed if it
didn't happen.

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