Health Is Wealth with Honey Lopez

Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:01):
It gets no better than this. You are now in
June to perspectives with big bang.

Speaker 2 (00:10):
Let's get straight to it so you miss all the
opportunities that you don't take and them big facts.

Speaker 3 (00:16):
As y'all can see, Perspective Bank has been took over
today by honey.

Speaker 2 (00:20):
The honeylow FIZT.

Speaker 3 (00:22):
How you doing to day point? I'm good?

Speaker 2 (00:23):
How are you?

Speaker 4 (00:24):
I don't bliss. I always ask before we get started,
like where your melting at right now?

Speaker 3 (00:28):
How you feeling? Were spirited?

Speaker 2 (00:30):
So on a scale from one to saying I'm not
a solid eight, I.

Speaker 3 (00:35):
Give it a it's another perfect never.

Speaker 2 (00:38):
Yeah, it's always been for opportunity. I always wake up
and I have have this use this thing called like
a witching hour. Okay, so between three and five is
called the witching hour. Is where your body simultaneously wakes
you up out of nowhere and you can't go back
to sleep, so your mind is racing, right, and so

(00:59):
it's called the witch hour. And that's when I do
most of my thinking. That's when I do my editing,
That's when I do my prayers, That's when I meditate
because my body is up and I just I can't
go back to and what time is that between three
and five.

Speaker 4 (01:12):
Three and five am it's called a witch and now.

Speaker 2 (01:14):
Witch an hour like witch like yeah, I guess which
now yeah, I don't really and the term came from.

Speaker 3 (01:22):
But it's actually a day okay, And and and what
and what happens doing during that time?

Speaker 2 (01:26):
Your body is just running off of fuel, like you
haven't really got into like you went out of your
rum sleep and now your body is trying to wake
up for the day. But you're still tired and lethargic,
but your body is still motivated to move. So now
you're restless and bad. So some people usually can go
back to sleep. Me, I don't go back to sleep.
I just allow myself to naturally just start moving.

Speaker 3 (01:48):
And you think that's what that creative. That's the truth though,
because you can be in the studio. I've been in
the studio playing niggas, right, they be in studio all day,
but soon them they get tied is when they make
a hit. That's it's crazy though. Cool. We could be
in the studio all day making that mumbo jumbo and
everybody goes to sleep. Nigga, wake you up with it?
Like that sounds good? He sleep.

Speaker 4 (02:08):
You sleep, engine is sleep. You know what I'm saying,
So I can go for that.

Speaker 2 (02:11):
So that's your witch an hour. You'll figure out what
it is. You'll text me and be like, hey, honey,
that's my witch an hour. But everybody has different ones.
Mineus just three from three to five.

Speaker 3 (02:19):
Oh oh, it don't have to be three to five.

Speaker 2 (02:22):
Just whatever yours is, because you know, some people run
on different times, like they have like different shits, So
it just kind of depends on when you go to sleep.
But mainly most people are asleep during that time. So
it's like a three five for.

Speaker 3 (02:33):
People that don't know you. Who are you, what you do,
what you stand for, where you come from.

Speaker 2 (02:37):
So my name is Honey Lopez, the one and only
real Honey, because you know, Honey's actually dark. I know
my light skinned sisters love for call themselves Honey, but
Honey's thick and dark. But I'm from Atlanta, Georgia. I'm
actually from Decator. I'm from the East Side. I'm thirty five.
I feel like I'm on a dating show. I'm single, out,

(03:00):
had no kids. Wait wait, but no, I'm from Atlanta.
I'm Jamaican and Portuguese. My last name really is Lopez,
and I am a full time content creator bitness enthusiast.
I'm in the middle of getting my Bitness certifications so
that I can be a full time trainer group fitness,
strength and conditioning and nutrition.

Speaker 3 (03:20):
What was you doing before you was doing I was.

Speaker 2 (03:23):
The store director for Jivon She Saint Laurent, Selene Prada ooh,
Michael Cores, I feel yeah, that's yeah, so yeah it
was you know, it was time to go, Like I think,
I did everything I needed to do there. I made
them millions and millions of dollars. I initiated so many
different things. I opened so many stores, especially during the pandemic.

(03:45):
I took Saint Laurent from a three million dollar door
to a fourteen million dollar door during pandemic. Black woman, yeah,
you know, with a team of five people working when
everyone else was at home chilling, I was laying handbags.
I've been products and so it was just a different
time for me. I realized that I loved luxury. I

(04:06):
always wanted to be a part of it. I love
how I made people feel when they would put on
the clothes and made them feel beautiful. And I loved
running a business but it's just so much racism, sexism,
all the things within the fashion industry. And I'm not
a yes woman, so I think a lot of times
they called me feisty or you know, I fought against
the masses, but in reality, some shit I just was

(04:27):
not going for and I just felt like I was drowning.
I would go in there every day and I'd have
to put on the front, and I'd have to be
so good for my employees and put on for my clients.
And I truly love what I do, but I was drowning.
I felt like I just wasn't truly myself, and I
felt like I was myself at the gym, but I
wasn't myself in those four doors, no matter how big

(04:47):
they were too. That is when I say my happy place.
It's so crazy. Like I prayed to God last year,
I was like, it was my day off from work
and I'm in the gym. I go to Affect Fitness.
I don't know if anybody knows about it, but is
the best performance Jim hands down. No offense to all
the other black gems, salute y'all, but Affect is a
different kind of beast. And I was taking my trainer's

(05:09):
class the Ball Effect. Reggie he played for Georgia Tech,
so everybody knows who Reggie Ball is. I was taking
his class and I was like, damn, I love being here,
Like this is what I want to do, Like I
just want to encourage people, like I want when people
see me working out, they feel like they can do it.
So when they feel motivated, and I want them to
see me and feel like whatever I'm doing is obtainable,

(05:30):
that you have fun. I have so much for I'll
be rapping. Yeah, like ill be rapping songs like bars.
I can't rap or sing, but maybe when I'm in
there like they played the Hood trap music, I'll be
in there rapping and it just keeps me going. Like
our music. Seriously, what you do the culture, that's what
drives us, and that's what made me lose my self.

Speaker 3 (05:47):
Shout outs to y'all, so I much waited to you
as loop.

Speaker 2 (05:51):
Well, Okay, I was two hundred pounds and I'm like
now roughly between one forty one forty five. Yeah on
a good day. Yeah, I'm trying to get to that
one thy one thirty five. I feel good, I feel sexy.
I can put on anything and I feel like the
baddest bitch.

Speaker 3 (06:05):
Why you why you want to keep losing weight? Though?
Why women always feel like they want to lose more
and more and more? Though women, you know what it is.

Speaker 2 (06:11):
It's because I didn't lose weight for a man, I've
been been hurt. I'll say that big or small, tall,
like I've always been able to date who I wanted
to date. But I didn't feel comfortable in my clothes,
like my thighs were fighting for space, and I just
was like, I'm hard. It's like this shit is it

(06:32):
is a Slatin whoo shit No for real, like it
was bad. It's like, oh gods like big women, but
you don't know what it feels like. We constantly rubbing
your thighs like it was terrible. And so when you
go on to the story and you try on clothes
like you want to feel good, and I just the
smaller I get. I still have maintained my curves, that's

(06:53):
nothing but God, but I just want to be petique.
I don't know what it feels like since I was
twenty one feel petite again. And I just like when
I wear heels, it don't feel like I'm you know,
my knees are about to clank over because ass is
so heavy. Yeah, so yeah, I think women always you
just get a motivation to keep losing. But once I
hit that one thirty five, and I look like a

(07:14):
little Bible head, like I'll be dead. Yeah it sounds crazy,
but you think about how thick I even think about.
I'm five to two, so one and one thirty five
on me looks completely different than someone that's five five
or five seven.

Speaker 4 (07:28):
So but you said earlier that people didn't believe it
was two hundred brothers.

Speaker 2 (07:31):
No, and they want to argue with me about it,
like you think I wanted just help people out. Was
two hundred browns and five to the shit. It's because
I carried my weight well, like I always was very curvy,
so my weight was evenly distributed, and when your weight
is like that, and I was solid, and I've always
worked out, I've never stopped working out. Like it didn't
just start two years ago. What happened was I had

(07:53):
I was like one fifty. I had knee surgery because
I jumped off of a like one of those boxes
at the gym, and my knee was one way, my
leg went the other. I severed my acl and tore
my miniscus in two places. I did not get it
repair for a whole year. My knee kept popping up
on my thigh and I finally was like, this is
not normal. I went and got it done. I ended
up getting two blood clots and I almost died, and

(08:15):
I was in the hospital for a long time and
back in and out, frustrated, couldn't walk, couldn't do all things.
I gained like sixty pounds, and I was on steroids,
and then when I finally got off of it, I
slowly started working out again. I went and got LiPo
because I said dispatting never coming back, so I went
and got LiPo three sixty. Then got bigger because I
re injured my knee again, so instead of the weight

(08:36):
distributed to my waist, it went everywhere else. And I
looked like the cutest little ramp panda. That was a
big bitch. I was et bitch. And then my ex, like, honestly,
I walked in the room one day and I'm being
honest with you, I don't think I never told nobody.
It's like he came home from being on the road
and I wanted to have sex and he was acting
like he was tired, and I said, ain't no where

(08:58):
you've been gone for two weeks and trying to blow
this down. You crazy. And so the next morning I
got up and went to the gym and I cried,
and I said, I'm breaking up with him, and so
we I know you. I'm gonna tell you what he did,
and tell you what he did. I cried, and then
he goes, I'm no longer attracted to you anymore. And

(09:20):
that shit hurt me so bad. But I couldn't be
mad at him because I didn't look the same as
when he first met me. And did he help me
try to lose the weight. No, But also it was
just like a part of me was sad with him,
but also a part of me was like, damn, bitch,
like get your shit together, like you know, this is
a person you love. Fuck what anybody else think about
you know you losing weight? Like this is really like

(09:42):
you need to do this for you, for your health,
for your everything, your back hurting, your breast of getting bigger.
And I broke up with him and I said, you're
gonna regret that. You all regret the words. And once
he tried to get back with me, and like not recently,
like a year, a year after I lost the weight,
and then also after that reas like last November, he

(10:02):
sent me roses to my job and was like, I
love you and all the things. And I just didn't
look at him the same because I feel like you
didn't stay down in the trenches with me like I
did when you ain't had no money, you know what
I'm saying. So like I just colored like it was
fuck up because well, he ain't have it. During COVID,
I told him to move in with me and he
didn't have to pay for nothing, And because I was
making six figures, I was like, figure out your business,

(10:23):
start your trucking company, whatever you need, I'll help you
because I believe in you. And I kind of felt
like he didn't love me like I loved him.

Speaker 4 (10:30):
So yeah, he can't, but he didn't love you.

Speaker 3 (10:32):
But you broke up with him. He just told you
want to attract it to you no more? Well that
ain't that he would you rather him be honest? I
would you be a play games and be cheating? No?

Speaker 2 (10:43):
Well that's the thing though he was cheating, but.

Speaker 3 (10:45):
He was gonna ran anyway. Pridely. But I'll just say,
this is just nigglas. I'm just saying. But I'm saying
or just I don't know. I'm just trying.

Speaker 2 (10:52):
No, no, no, I agree. But I kind of felt like,
if you were no longer attracted to me, then what
were we doing because you were also helping me lose weight.
You weren't cooking with me, you you weren't motivating me.
I was having to self motivate myself.

Speaker 3 (11:03):
Oh, he just came out to blue with it.

Speaker 2 (11:05):
Yeah, he even so. He only told me that because
I told him, I feel like you don't love me
the same, and he was like, it's not that he
doesn't love me the same, he just felt like he
was no longer attracted to me. Famn, it's cold, it's cold,
but you know what you made mean? So cold ass dish.

Speaker 3 (11:17):
Yeah, you ain't going through that no more. They ain't
gonna never happen to get here.

Speaker 2 (11:22):
How look in the mirror like that?

Speaker 1 (11:23):
Itch?

Speaker 3 (11:26):
Yeah.

Speaker 2 (11:27):
So m it's cool.

Speaker 3 (11:28):
Though, Yeah, it's dope. So you went to school.

Speaker 2 (11:30):
I went to the University of Florida, Go Gators. I
went to PWI and I was at FAMU on the weekends.

Speaker 3 (11:36):
M huh, okay, so you still go back. So so
when when when they played Georgia? Who you at the
Gator State.

Speaker 2 (11:42):
I'm always gonna be a Gator fan, So I'm gonna listen.
Let me tell you something. Everybody didn't get the experiences
I did out there during the Tim Tebow era. I'm
class in two thousand and seven, so it's a little
we hit different over there because we won basketball and
football and volleyball and baseball. So when I was in college,
like I got the true you know that experience you
see on Him White movie We're be like yay the
way and tea that was us so and I met

(12:04):
my best friends, like and I'm still close with them
to this day, like all super successful black women, like
really really dope. Like my experience at a PWI was
different because I went to school with some niggas like
from Florida, Like you know, they real different down there,
So my experience was completely different.

Speaker 3 (12:22):
Yeah, what's the pros and cons of PW I No,
I'll finished say both, do both. I'll finish a being
a content creator. But go ahead, Oh shit.

Speaker 2 (12:35):
So okay, let me explain this because a lot of
people go to pwis and unless you really went to
one of the d one you know what I'm saying.
Sec ACC schools a lot of times they don't understand.
But the pros are we get the best of everything.
So the latest technology. When I went to college, I
think the iPhone came out eight, so like I got
to experience, like you know, the different MacBooks and all

(12:57):
the things that people wanted to buide for it. At
HBC you we really got to experience and it's like selfishly,
it's like, damn, I really wish HBCUs got the same
funding that we did, but we had the best of everything.
And then when it came to internships, I interned at MTV.
I majored in journalism, so I'm not to cut, edit,
do all the things. That's what I went to school for.
So in hindsight, full circle, right, But when it came

(13:21):
to my internship, it was like this, Like I didn't
I didn't have to wait through fifty million you know people.
It was so easy for me to get an internship
at MTV because we were ranked number four in the
nation for journalism. But the cons were the racism, you know,
the still the looks and like that that will never change.
They want us there to do something like oh, you
got to be doing something, you got to play in

(13:42):
sport or what are you good for? You know, and
so it was just we went through a lot of
that back then with the racism and also just not
really getting the best of the HBCU culture. Like I
don't think anything compares to that, like me going on
the weekends and me going to more House homecoming. I
wish I would have had that. So if it was
up to me, I did two years there and then
two years out a pwy SO to get both experienced.

Speaker 3 (14:04):
Okay, what about content creator?

Speaker 2 (14:09):
Yeah, content people think I'm a stripper, they think I'm
a like I'm an Instagram model and they don't really realize.
And you can understand this because now you're you know,
you're creating your different platforms and your podcasts and everything
we have going on, Like it's hard. We gotta get
up every morning and be motivated to put on for
you niggas, especially if you're saying you're doing your own editing,

(14:32):
you're doing do everything myself. The only thing I don't
edit is shout out to Yoshi for my podcast that
I do call bar talk with my business partner and
we go to different bars and we can talk about
that later. But besides that, I edit everything myself. I
get up and I edit everything. I come up with
every concept. Like it's hard when you and you're trying
to make sure you stay true to what your platform is.
A lot of times like people want to change you

(14:54):
or they want you to do something else. I don't
wear makeup when I shoot. I find it very odd
when I see women doing work videos and they got
a face full of makeup. That's not realistic. Like, girl,
why your hair ain't messed up? I've rented shout out
to Mike the hair God. My hair always looks bid
when I work out. But I get my hair done
every week and I wrap it every single time. But
I'll be in there. You see me sweat clothes, rolled

(15:15):
up clothes, not fitting right, like make it look like
you're actually doing something. I just hate the stigma around
content creators. It's like, oh, I go to the gym
and recording, I leave.

Speaker 3 (15:24):
No.

Speaker 2 (15:24):
I go into the gym, I work out with my
trainer for an hour the ball effect, and then I
turn around and I go to boot camp for another
hour and then y'all see the after effects of what
I'm doing. I be in there wrapping and dancing. But baby,
I don't burn a thousand calories what you doing? You
know what I'm saying. So I think other content creators
like we try to uplift each other, but you know,
it's always something. So I try to keep that off

(15:47):
my mask.

Speaker 3 (15:47):
So that's what you're gonna just do. You're gonna do
the straight fitness? Are you gonna?

Speaker 2 (15:51):
I do a little bit of fitness, a lot of
hair because I think black women have the stigma of oh,
I can't work out because my hair, girl, you sound crazy.
Get your hair done, find a protective hairstyle. Like so
I try to show them that you can still have,
you know, a thirty inch bus down and still be
able to go to the gym. And then now I
have vitamins if I want to show them like, you know,

(16:13):
I don't cook. Okay, we're gonna talk about that. That's
not I know. Something had to be wrong with me, right,
So we're gonna I'm probably gonna start cooking with honey,
show that. I want you to come on so you
can show I can't.

Speaker 3 (16:25):
I know you can. Yeah, I cook.

Speaker 2 (16:26):
I can't cook. I got you at all, and I'm jamaking.
I know that sounds real crazy, I.

Speaker 3 (16:30):
Know, but you got a lot of shit. Yeah you
can clean what baby?

Speaker 2 (16:34):
I can clean the fuck out of anything.

Speaker 4 (16:35):
So so yeah, you just somebody to know how to cook.
You clean up after Yeah.

Speaker 2 (16:39):
Last name is Lopez. Hello, Okay, I can, I can,
I can clean, but maccount cook at all and I
just don't understand. I don't have a passion for it.
So that's my initiative for myself that I want.

Speaker 3 (16:50):
Know. I just took one of those Sea mans done
and that's the first I hate sea malls. Yeah, no,
I'm good. ITAs like you just see that, eat them.
It's like candy.

Speaker 2 (16:59):
Yes, and you know what you only have to take
to today. It basically is immune health. This is Vita Stars.
I teamed up with the really really awesome company and
the guy started it Black owned. He started it because
he wanted vitamins for his kids, and then the parents
kept eating the kids vitamins. So he was like, he
partnered with me and was like, why don't we create
adult vitamins. So we came up with the flavors, and

(17:21):
we came up with the names black seed oil and
honey gummies because of me. Now shout out to honey,
sea moss and then Oshawa Gana and Shi legit break
those Okay, So sea moss, you guys know it comes
from the sea. It helps with the detoxification of the body.
You want to make sure that your blood cells are
detoxifying so that way you can regenerate faster and that

(17:42):
you have your breathing better, Like everything is better from
the inside out. Detox immunity, black seat oil and honey
honey same thing. Honey is one of the most nutrients
and it will literally help cure your body. I saw
this TV show and like, I guess this lady got
like a chemical some chemol thing. They dumped her in
some honey and it was able to keep her safe

(18:03):
until they were able to get her to wherever that was.
And it's so funny how honey works also for the
immunity that has apple cider vinegar in it as well.
She legit in Oshawa Ganda. That is my work life balance.
It gives you energy, but it also relaxes you. So
it's just making sure that it works with people who
suffer from anxiety like me.

Speaker 3 (18:21):
But about six of them.

Speaker 2 (18:25):
Now listen, that's weed you straight, really, that that's what this,
that's what The black one is.

Speaker 3 (18:32):
Black one. It gotta be nash.

Speaker 2 (18:34):
So they said it was good. I like it. It's different.
It has like a blueberry taste. But the other ones
aren't so good.

Speaker 3 (18:40):
That not good.

Speaker 2 (18:42):
The green one's fire, Yeah, it does, that's what it is.

Speaker 3 (18:47):
It tastes like tea, energy and mental clarity. Yeah, stressfully.
Oh yeah, so stars.

Speaker 2 (18:56):
I have bid the stars yep. And they have kids
by the men too. So if y'all have kids, we
have all of that, it's going to be on my Amazon.

Speaker 3 (19:03):
So so. So with that being said, so you just
walk walk by faith by leaving that job.

Speaker 2 (19:11):
And and figuring the shit out. I was scared, y'all.
So I paid off all my debts. So I'm completely
debt free day for eight ten. Baby. When I say
I'm a hot come I all I just don't do
is cook everything else. I got you. I paid off
all my I did everything else, and then I was like,
I don't want to do this no more. Now, don't

(19:31):
get me wrong. I will be a street sweeper. I
will go and work in McDonald's wherever you need me to.
If I got to, I will figure it out. I'll
get another job if I have to suck. But while
I'm doing this, I felt like I was doing a
disservice to myself not to follow my dreams.

Speaker 3 (19:45):
No, that's that's that's correct. That's why I ask you that.
So so some girls that's in here watching this or
watching you, they can hear that come out of your mind.
Like I was scared, you know what I'm saying.

Speaker 2 (19:56):
Fuck, I'm scared every day.

Speaker 4 (19:57):
Yeah, hell yeah, stick because it's all on you.

Speaker 2 (19:59):
Every day is all on me. Every day I gotta
get up and create content that I think is positive
because I'm not gonna flee into the masses. And every
day I gotta be like, all right, honey, what do
you gotta do? You gotta believe in yourself because you're
a whole brand. And I'm blind in one eye. So
it's just like a lot of things, I'm not playing.
I'm dan. Yeah, that's why. Like people, if you ever
look at my comments, sometimes they be like, do you

(20:21):
have a lazy eye? You cock eyed? I'm like, And
then one time my lawyer was on there, she was like,
actually she can't see she's partially blind, Like I'm only
had ten percent vision in my right eye.

Speaker 3 (20:30):
What happened?

Speaker 2 (20:31):
So? I have something called carataconus where it is like
the eyeball. Instead of it being flat cornea, it's coned,
so I can only see peripherally. But behind there I
have this thing called retinus ping mintosa, and that means
that the eyes, the cells behind the eye are dead.
I went to the eye doctor. I did a video on.

Speaker 3 (20:50):
And it's crazy my eyes. I know, like that's crazy
in our life work right? Yeah.

Speaker 2 (20:55):
I went to the doctor and she told me I
was one in one million, and she told me I
can never get my vis back because the cells behind
it are dead. But she said be thankful because most
people have it in both eyes and they may have
to do like a cornial transplant. But because I just
have it in one, one eye is twenty twenty and
this one I can't see, which is what caused me
to injure myself because I couldn't see on this side.

(21:16):
So I cried because I couldn't figure it. I was like,
why is my eye so lazy? Why is it so sleepy?
I was like, what's wrong with me? I was like
maybe I just need contexts. Whatever I went and spent
the money, I wor glasses now and people still make
fun of me. They'll be like, you a pretty cock eye, motherfucker.
And I'd be like, all right, I guess whatever.

Speaker 3 (21:34):
Like, see, you can't get the whats the laser? You
can't get it.

Speaker 2 (21:38):
I can't get laser because the cells behind the eye
are dead.

Speaker 3 (21:41):
I'd say that with my brother dead because he couldn't
get No, he couldn't heat, but it was in both
his eyes. He couldn't have know.

Speaker 2 (21:48):
So most people have it in both of their eyes.
Here makes me one in one million. And normally you
would have to do like they could serve for the
character conis, which is the coning. They would give you
a contact that would like flatten it out. See you
kind of see better. But when you look at my eye,
I literally have no percentage of vision, like it looks black.
So she showed me the difference between my eye functions.

Speaker 3 (22:08):
So I thought you were just talking shit.

Speaker 2 (22:10):
No, I really am lying. I just make fun of
it now because it's like, you know, like Kevin Hart says,
laughing my pain, Like what am I gonna do? You
know what I'm saying, I just have to be the
best version of me. So with all the odds that
are stacked up against me, with everything that I've been through,
like I feel like there's somebody out there that doesn't
know that's wrong with them, or somebody that is, you know,
sees me and thinks that I'm perfect or thinks that
everything is good. And it's like now I fight for

(22:32):
my life every day and praying that this one don't
turn and then I'll be Ray Chaul's and this motherfucker.
But I'm still gonna be cute.

Speaker 3 (22:38):
Though, Love, You're gonna be all right. Hey, let me
ask you some you said earlier you have anxiety bad?
Where you think your anxiety come from.

Speaker 2 (22:48):
Feeling like I'm not enough, feeling like I'm not where
I was supposed to be in life. I think at
thirty five, I would have been married with kids by now,
and now I'm finally okay with not having that. But
I just felt like I just wasn't where I thought
my life would be. And I also thought becoming a
content creator at thirty five is scary as fuck, because

(23:11):
you know, most people think that you're old, but I
kind of look young, so I'm like, Hey, I'm gonna
just ride it out. And then I started thinking about
how like Boris Whitaker, Danzel, Holly Berry, hell Angela Bassador
are still out there, they acting and you know, they're
in their sixties and they're not stopping. Hell, Donald Trump
still want to be president in ninety nine. So it's
just like sure me, It's like there's the you know,

(23:34):
anything is limitless, like the possibilities are endless, and so
I just had to stop feeding into that fear that
I'm not where I'm supposed to be.

Speaker 3 (23:43):
Yeah, because life life just starting at thirty five, you
just started this new shit, right.

Speaker 2 (23:47):
Yeah, but it's still scary. This is all my vision board,
by the way, you what you for real?

Speaker 3 (23:53):
Yeah?

Speaker 2 (23:53):
Because like when you reached out to me, I actually
had a whole little spill written up for you to
pitch myself to you. And if that and you did
it right around my birthday, I said, that's number.

Speaker 4 (24:01):
Guy was an artist, So no, that was number.

Speaker 2 (24:06):
God, You're on my vision board.

Speaker 3 (24:07):
Oh shit, we here. I can't wait to come on your.

Speaker 2 (24:09):
Ship wait bartalk Yeah, and then I'm gonna do.

Speaker 3 (24:13):
Both of them. What so you said, because any anxiety
come from feeling like the fear of failure, okay, to
fear of failure okay, cool. I think we all deal
with that though, you know what I'm saying. But but
don't God always make.

Speaker 2 (24:27):
A way always? But you know, I think also anxiety
is a bad stigma, but it shouldn't be because when
you're anxious, it means that you want more. Sometimes, like
let's let's let's flip that right. You're anxious because you
want more, you want to be more, and you don't
want to be complacent. There's leaders and there's followers. We
need followers in order to lead people. And so with

(24:47):
being someone who always wants to be a leader, like
that anxiousness drives me to be like our bitch, keep going.
People are looking at you, and there are people also
waiting on your downfall, So are you gonna prove them right?
Or you're gonna prove them wrong? And then I look
at people but like you and what you've done with
your life and then even with your fitness goes and
how you you you created this hiking You make that
shit look cool because you cool as fuck, you know

(25:08):
what I'm saying, Like you make hood jiggas like hell yeah,
I want to get fit, you know what I'm saying.
And that's like, and you're so respected, so it's like
I think, and I'm not even trying to be corny,
but if you can do it, hell, I can do
it too, you know what I'm saying.

Speaker 3 (25:21):
Yeah, Yeah, that's my whole a jem that I ain't
trying to push it on nobody. I ain't trying to
preach it. I'm just trying to show it.

Speaker 2 (25:27):
And people love you because of it. Like when I
told people I was going out here, the level of
respect for you was crazy, you know what I'm saying.
So I was like, hell you do, I'm going on.
I'm like, shit, that's my first one. So I just
think I look at people that I admire and go,
if you can do it every day, and you can
do it through your grief, like it talks about grief never,

(25:49):
it never goes away, and you're still pushing every day,
you know what I'm saying. And I want you to
and I know I'm not to to be preaching, like
I really want you to continue to keep pushing because
he's looking at you every day like you can't quit.
You can cry in that corner and go in that
bathrootal quick, but you better get your ass back up.
You can perspectives with motherfucking bank. You feel me, and
you gotta keep putting on because there's people like me

(26:10):
looking at you, and it's like, if he can do
this through his grief, then what am I doing? I'm
sitting at home doing what?

Speaker 3 (26:16):
Nah? This vice versa, Like I told you your story
is just like just watching a person just be determined
makes me go hard. Like it can be a walk,
it could be a child, it can be anybody. It
could be a dude with one hand working a job.
It could be anything. To let me know you're not
making an excuse that should do something to me. That

(26:38):
shit like a fire for me, you know what I'm saying.
So seeing y'all in that gym, seeing you in that
gym going crazy eir day and putting your cunting up,
and then actually and you say you walk away from.

Speaker 4 (26:47):
A good paying job to chase your dream.

Speaker 3 (26:50):
That that that that makes you want to keep going, bro,
no matter what level you're at, no matter how old
you are, how young you are. Bro.

Speaker 4 (26:59):
If you don't get in by great people, bro, you.

Speaker 2 (27:01):
Just hate them every time. But you know what. Sometimes
people hate what they don't want to be, can't be,
or don't have the drive to be, and sometimes keep
like I live that I gotta sum. It came from
the heart enough to read. People hate what they can't be,
don't want to be, and don't have the drive to be. First,

(27:22):
and it's like what Chris Brown said, you hang from
outside the club, you can come in here with me
the baby. If you want to hate out from outside
you you're gonna You're never gonna be more than what
you want to be because you don't see it. I've
dated people who was like you, you live in the
la la land, and I'm like, if I didn't, then
I couldn't be where I'm at right now. People used
to be like one of my friends and I love

(27:43):
her to death, but she I hate that for real.
I love her though. She said to me, I hate
that you're always posting. You're always posting, she said, I
just be going through your story. I said. There's somebody
who watches my fifty five stories and want to go
through each one because it motivates them. You don't have
to be that, I said, but you can unclick and
unfollow because there's gonna be ten other people that want
to follow me. And at the time I had ten
thousand followers. Now I'm at two hundred and eighty three

(28:04):
thousand hours. So baby, somebody cares if the hell your
followship is a consistency though every single time it's just.

Speaker 3 (28:12):
Consistency because I saw you on explore page. Oh really,
this is why I asked you where you're from Atlanta. Like,
it's just I don't know, man, I don't know how
to explain it. People. People they'll never be able.

Speaker 4 (28:21):
To see it, like you say, because they know they
can't do it, but all they gotta do.

Speaker 3 (28:24):
We're not, well, we are special, but yeah, we're not
doing nothing that can't be done, that can be done.
All they got it.

Speaker 4 (28:31):
All we did was made a choice to do it.

Speaker 2 (28:33):
But it gotta be in you though. You gotta be yeah,
because you okay, got to be on the spectrum like
artistic people. We kind of a little slow hard, but
also very like smart. You gotta be low key on
the spectrum and be a genius to do what we do,
especially when it comes to like what you do in music,
because y'all hear something we don't hear. Baby, I don't
know what is.

Speaker 3 (28:52):
I don't know.

Speaker 2 (28:52):
I'm telling that for what, But what y'all do you
have to have? Like that's something in you. You hear
something and it like flows in the air, and that
to me, those people are very like very special people.
So everybody can't do that because they're intimidated about on
who they are have the potential to be. You know
what I'm saying. They get to the door and they
don't want to open it because they're scared, and they're like, oh,

(29:14):
I'd rather just be complacent, which is why dating for
me is so hard because I know I want to
be bigger than big, and most of the guys I meet,
they're like, I just want something small. Maybe I don't
want to be small. I want the best of the best.

Speaker 3 (29:25):
And I.

Speaker 2 (29:27):
Like, they're like, oh, I just want a house. I
want a car, I want a dog. Maybe I want
the mansion. Can a mansion? Like I want to scream
from one room to the next. I want to run
around naked from room playing gotcha, gotcha? You know what
I'm saying. And they don't want that, like they would
rather just have a normal life or they don't want
to be in the spotlight and you don't have to
be and that's cool, but I want you to be

(29:48):
okay with me being in the spotlight. And every single
time I date somebody, they stay that cool with how
I dress, how I act, how I talk, my personality
at first because that's what they're intrigued. And they're like
they like right, intimidated, very every time. And I'm a
lover and I'm very submissive, so I don't get it,
like what you want me to do. I don't cook,
but I do everything else.

Speaker 3 (30:08):
Okay, So so you.

Speaker 4 (30:09):
Said, but you do you have time for the nigga?

Speaker 3 (30:12):
Do it?

Speaker 2 (30:12):
You make time for as a leo, and you know
we talked about that loyalty, then right, we make time
for whatever we want to make time for. I think
there's twenty four hours in a day, so I do.
I put everything on my calendar and my schedule. I'm
gonna make time for my man and do what I
need to do at home because if my home life
is good, I do better. Like when you think about it,
when you with your lady and y'all doing good, She

(30:33):
loving you right, you loving her right? Y'all positive, y'all
not at odds you produce better, you're a better person.
You're happy, or you give good energy when y'all like odd,
your stomach hurt, you know what I'm saying, Like you
feel sick, you're not your best self. He says, your
partner is not doing what they need to do. So
I just feel like now being single, it's like I
need somebody that understands my dream and you don't want

(30:55):
to have to do the same thing I do, which
just continue to encourage me to be better because I
need that better in my back. I do it by
myself daily and I got like a real good support system.
Like my hairstyles is my best friend. Oh my god,
he pushes me every day. He's like, before I came here,
you gotta shoot that content. And when you go on
that show, you tell your story, and it's like I
need that. I wish he was straight, Like that would

(31:18):
be my man. Oh my year, daddy, very shit, he
would like me. So it's like I just pray I'll
find a man that's like him. Neck it's like likes women,
you know what I'm saying, But for real, like it's
hard for me. I ain't even gonna host you. It's
hard to date cuz I want I want my man
to I want him to be successful and I want

(31:40):
him to be a provider. I'm not asking he don't
have to be a millionaire, but I want him to
be successful in his own right or on his way
to success. Because I'm thirty five, so I can't date ambition. Now.
I need to date somebody big, some fucky substance, and
I need you to be able to provide for me
if I have a baby, because I'm not like for

(32:01):
the person you gonna start working for the first Well, no,
I don't. I don't consider content creating and influence and working.
I consider it a passion. So it's like, yes it's
work for me, and yes it's my job, but it's
my passion. So I don't like, you know, like this
has worked for you, but you also enjoyed it, you
know what I'm saying, This therapy. So it's like, yere,
you go to work, but shit like this is fun,

(32:22):
you know what I'm saying. I'm talking about it if
I had to go out there and get a you know,
a nine to five and work from home, which is
not is not I'm not above that. I don't want
to have to do that when I'm going through my pregnancy,
like I want the ability to because I'm so tiny,
I'm probably gonna be on bed rest at six months.
I want to know that I don't have to go
out there and slave and have a complicated pregnancy because
my man can't handle it. You know what I'm saying.

(32:43):
I need a partner. But I'm not going fifty s
fifty with no nigga. I just it's not it. It's
just not. Let let's be honest. I want to provider
and a protector. I'm not saying I won't work because again,
but his character has to be like I want him
to be God searing. I want him to work out
because that's a non negotiable. I want him to be

(33:03):
in shape, non negotiable because I want you on this
planet with me for as long as you can possibly be.
I want you to be healthy from the inside out.
I want you to pray. I want you to have
a plan for us, and I want to eventually start
a business together. But a lot of people are not
that ambitious. They are fine with working their regular nine
to five jobs and they don't want more than that.
And that's okay, but that does that mean that I

(33:25):
have to settle for that. Let's be honest. Does that
mean that I have to settle for someone who does
not want the same things as me? Just to say
that I'm going to get married and have somebody, and
I don't want struggle love thirty five? Struggle love was
in my twenties and I did it.

Speaker 3 (33:41):
I don't want that.

Speaker 2 (33:42):
Yeah, I didn't struggle. He was struggling, so I helped him.
And then therefore it's like my income became both of
our incomes. So it's not like I've never dated someone
who didn't have as much as me. But now, because
I am now following my dreams and I'm becoming entrepreneur,
I need somebody even carry away. I'm sored to being hercules.
I don't want to. I want but am I feminine?

(34:04):
Very soft, cuddly, like the little care beer that like
does the downy balls and shit, Yeah that's it.

Speaker 3 (34:11):
So he gotta be black, Okay black, successful well successful or.

Speaker 2 (34:18):
In his own right promising successful. He at least needs
to make in a perfect world. See, he also depends
on debt income ratio. So like, if you don't have
a lot of debt and you're making seventy eighty thousand
dollars a year. It's different when you don't have any
debt because you're basically everything you're bringing in the spray
yourself and that's just one of your incomes. But if
you're making four hundred thousand dollars a year and you

(34:39):
got three hundred thousand dollars in debt, what are we doing?
You know what I'm saying, Like, it gotta makes sense,
and that is it good debt or bad that, or
you have investments or not. So we got to break
down the ratio. And a lot of women don't break
it down, which is why y'all think they're ignorant because
they're like, Oh, I want a nigga with money. Well,
does the nigga with money have investments? What is his
credit score? How many kids does he have? You know
what I'm saying, Like, you think all this because you

(35:01):
want to make sure he's a good father and that
he's making sure that he takes care of his kids
and he has a great relationship or at least a
co parency understanding with the child's mom. I'm not dating
nobody from beefing with the baby mama because I don't
want to get between that, like you know what I'm saying,
I'm a girl's girl, and I want to make sure
that is cope standing.

Speaker 3 (35:21):
Let me ask you something. What percentage of niggas do
you think is left?

Speaker 2 (35:26):
Who explaining saying, which is why I'm about to be
out here switching side.

Speaker 3 (35:32):
If be going on over there?

Speaker 1 (35:35):
Lay?

Speaker 2 (35:36):
Hey girl, that's like I'm sired, like she's a baby's fine.
Guess I got like it's sus I heard Sun's treat
the woman.

Speaker 3 (35:50):
This and what.

Speaker 2 (35:51):
But they take care. They trick a little bit. Yeah,
they can subform my podcast. Three's thinking up. They can
sufform my podcast. You gonna buy me a micro suit?
But they invest, Okay, invest in me.

Speaker 3 (36:05):
Baby says she's been in swims side. That fucker. Don't
go yet.

Speaker 2 (36:11):
If you find me somebody, I'll get you twenty percent,
saying to what you know, Okay, off the cuff once
I get mixed, how do you find her? Three?

Speaker 3 (36:23):
Oh dad, that's serious, but you gotta know what you do.
I don't know. No niggas and the nigga you have.

Speaker 2 (36:27):
To strive, okay, they got they can't have more than
two kids.

Speaker 3 (36:29):
Them nigga beef with.

Speaker 2 (36:32):
Oh with your baby mom without then she gonna come
after me. And I don't want to be attacked no more.
Already have one baby. Mama attacked me this year. I
don't want to know.

Speaker 3 (36:39):
If you get a nigga who got kids, that's worth something.
They mama still love him.

Speaker 2 (36:43):
That's that's true.

Speaker 3 (36:44):
Okay, that's just what it is. She's still she's still mad.

Speaker 2 (36:47):
Okay, big mad.

Speaker 3 (36:48):
Yeah that you can't pull up on no ship like this. Yeah,
now who pull up with this? Why why you going
to all typos child support?

Speaker 2 (36:57):
Listen? Okay, so listen. Why do you telling my bus?
But I tell my business. The guy was dating it
one time, was like, I can't even tell my baby
mama dad like I got a girl because if she do,
she gonna put me on back child support if she
see you. And I'm like, that's crazy.

Speaker 3 (37:11):
That's the truth.

Speaker 2 (37:12):
My mama was always let me say, so whatever team am.
My dad went away because he was a trigular whatever
it is, what it is, I'm I'm fine with it,
and now I'm coping with it. I'm thirty five. He was
like one of the biggest ones in Atlanta back in
the nineties. So then he went to jail cool. My
mama held her down. She never fuss, fight, fought with
no women nothing, never talked bad about my dad. So

(37:33):
for me, if I was to have a baby daddy,
I wouldn't be like that. But I think it's what
you see from your parents because they don't get that
trade just out of nowhere. That's what their parents put
on them. For those women to act like that. And
I know these dudes make you mad, but you ain't
gotta argue with him. If you want to put them
on child support, just do it calmly. If you want
to say, look, we need to work out an agreement,

(37:54):
do it calmly. Doing all that extra and going back
and forth, that's just fucking up your mental And now
you arguing with somebody and you're not even able to
move on properly because you're arguing with this person.

Speaker 3 (38:04):
Some people don't want to move on, but they got to.

Speaker 2 (38:06):
If he don't want your baby, you don't want she
want you, And if she don't want you baby, she
don't want And I will wait to move on to
something don't work for me because it's not meant to be.
And if it, I don't do the whole spend the
black thing.

Speaker 3 (38:17):
Baby.

Speaker 2 (38:17):
Once we've done, we done because I told you how
to treat me the first time. So it's just like,
I'm really big on that, not saying that I don't
go through things, but after a while, people gonna continue
to treat you how you treat yourself. So I just
get tired people wasting my time. Like you knew you
came around to me because I was a shiny toy.
Now you want to waste my time.

Speaker 3 (38:33):
Don't.

Speaker 2 (38:33):
Don't waste my time just to be alone. It's okay,
he's cool.

Speaker 4 (38:38):
You gotta give this shit a couple more years and
then you can't go on over there.

Speaker 2 (38:42):
Okay, we gonna have this conversation and two two more years, y'all.
If bank don't find my man in two more years, girl,
you go for you, oh if you do. And I
want him to be kind. I want him to be fun.

Speaker 3 (38:57):
Yeah, I think that the ship you describing his point
five percent?

Speaker 2 (39:04):
Oh, thank you right here. It's good now because you
know we can't. This is my this is my crime
and glory. Okay, why is that a unicorn?

Speaker 3 (39:16):
Huh?

Speaker 2 (39:16):
I want him to be a great lover. Sex gotta
be on point. We at least gotta have sex Friday's week,
twice a day, Friday's a week ten times. That ain't bad,
I don't you got He gotta work out, you know
what I'm saying. He gotta take care of his body,
he gotta eat well, and he gotta be productive. Why

(39:37):
is that what the fuck is heard about? That you
want me to cook clean, have sex, but.

Speaker 3 (39:44):
You already want to have sex, so you take that out.

Speaker 2 (39:46):
Okay, you want me to cook, clean and provide mental Okay,
let me tell that. It's not that I don't know
how to cook. I just don't like to cook. There
are sorry people that like cook like they're gonna be there.
I don't get excited when I make food. I have
to be like salad. But I like when other people
make food for me because I was meant to be

(40:07):
your princess, I think. But also in Jamaica, I grew
up with a nanny, so like I grew up with
someone in the house always cooking, you know what I'm saying,
And then like I just I think, like even growing up,
my mom kept me out the kitchen and kept me
in ballet, jazz, piano, cheerleading, gymnastics, like I did so

(40:27):
many activities and computer courses and stuff like. She told
me I didn't need to be in a kitchen. I
need to be a boss. And she was a boss,
so she knew how to cook, but she just didn't steal.

Speaker 3 (40:37):
That in me.

Speaker 2 (40:38):
She and also she didn't want me to be fat,
so she definitely kept my hands out of the kitchen.
It's like, what are you doing? She would regulate everything
I ate, and it's not a bad thing.

Speaker 3 (40:45):
I don't.

Speaker 2 (40:45):
I'm not mad at the way I grew up, but
I feel like y'all want us to do everything and
more and be a support system. Why do I have
to look for a unicorn? I can't find a man
that's like emotionally available with his feelings.

Speaker 3 (40:59):
You think, think, Go ahead and tell me how many
women you think looking for that same guy.

Speaker 2 (41:07):
All of us? It is a drop.

Speaker 3 (41:10):
If it's a drought, them niggas already taken and she
and it's somebody crazy about them.

Speaker 2 (41:17):
Yeah, the one out there, godway, that one give me
all this fine. It's the audest charismatic personality for me
to be out here looking for some Uhikuchi. He knew better.
I don't want that, but it.

Speaker 3 (41:32):
Would be most of the time I see women don't
don't like the dudes that like them.

Speaker 2 (41:38):
No, not a lot of times. Ten times out of ten,
we really don't. I like the ones I like. I
need to start liking the ones that like me. But
then I don't know the ones that like me. Also
like to play games. I was talking to this one
guy and he just kept putting on these sweet nothings.
He was like, what are you looking for? I was
like a protector, provider, all the things that he was like,

(41:59):
I am that he got two kids, you know, widower whatever.
His ex wife passed away and he was still playing games?

Speaker 3 (42:08):
What game like?

Speaker 2 (42:11):
He basically, in so many words, was like, I like you.
I want to get to know y'all, want to do
all these things. I'm intentional about you. And then literally
ended up trying to talk to one of my friends
and I found out it's cold. That's cold, Like why
would you do that? Like it's a waste of tign
Like you really could have just left me alone.

Speaker 3 (42:33):
Did she tell you that? Did he did you find me?

Speaker 2 (42:36):
I told her this. I wasn't. I didn't tell her that.
Him and she and him and I, him and I
were speaking. I never told her that we were talking.
I was just telling her like a story about him,
and she was like, I think that's the same guy
who asked me out last week. And I was like,
women always do that, But she would a lotto because
she didn't know that. She didn't know when I was

(42:56):
telling her the story. I wasn't saying it in a
way that was like, oh, where like we're talking. I
said it in a way like, oh, that's the homie.
I was just like because I didn't want to because
I don't really like that.

Speaker 3 (43:08):
Like women know when when you involve certain dudes, Man,
they still do that. Bro, Like you know how made
the motherfuckers would be trying to say we used to
talk and.

Speaker 4 (43:16):
Me and Wyne used to nothing.

Speaker 2 (43:18):
I feel the only reason why I felt like what
she said with you was the dialogue and the dynamic
of the conversation.

Speaker 3 (43:23):
Saying they could reach the to be. But I'm saying,
you gotta watch these women though they'll try to keep
you from your blessing.

Speaker 2 (43:29):
That's true, But again, I'm just giving you one of
the stories in my dating history. It's just like I
just feel like a lot of guys sometimes and you
can admit to this, and women too, like before you
know whatever, back in the day when you used today
women like they then they used to like put on
and like pretend to be something they or not just
to get close to you. And then when you started
dating for a couple, unless you'd be like hell no,
like you ain't nothing, like yeah, they put that mask on. Yeah,

(43:51):
And so I get that all the time. That's why
I hate guys. I hate meeting guys who've already seen
my social media before they meet me, because they already
had this ideal of who I am in like their head,
and then like they meet me and be like, oh
you real, down to earth, you cool as fuck. I am,
Like I'm not saditi, I'm not none of that. I'm
really a tomboy. I really hate wearing makeup, but I

(44:12):
do it because whatever sesthetically pleasing. But like, I feel
like people already have an image of who I am,
and then they meet me and it's somebody else and
then they're like, oh damn, she real cool, Oh she's soft,
she did she that? And then I feel like they
try to get over cause it's just so many beautiful
women out there. It's like how do you differentiate between
you know, wish ones better than the other.

Speaker 3 (44:31):
You can't.

Speaker 2 (44:31):
It's just based off of like you're vibing the feeling
that you have. Stop wasting my motherfucking tome. If you
got ten of me like, it's okay, I would hope
there's other ten beautiful women that are entrepreneurs, successful, got
good pus, see all the things like, I love that
for you, But don't waste my time if you're not
gonna be serious, because I told you what I was
looking for. I told you what type of time mymine.
I told you my clock is ticking. I need to

(44:53):
have a baby in three years. You what's fun? What
are you doing? And if that's not what you want
to do, that's cool, But let's be.

Speaker 3 (44:59):
Honest about how early do you say that though?

Speaker 2 (45:03):
And they're still staying around? Yeah, because I'm honest, I
know what I'm saying, what I'm saying. So that's a
lot of pressure though, it is you either what do
they say? You either shit on the potter or get
off or what I been, I'm off.

Speaker 3 (45:20):
Whatever.

Speaker 2 (45:21):
I will figure it out. I'm gonna look it up.
But it's one of them sayings. You know what I'm saying,
like you, get off the pot or whatever the fuck
the word is. But yeah, it's a pot, you know,
back in the day nineteen fifty five. But like you know,
it's either like you you you, you do what you
need to do, or get off like I'm pressure you.
But I'm telling you what I want and I'm not
telling you I want it right now. I'm saying this
is like, Okay, let's say I just met you. You single,

(45:44):
I'm single. Hey, I like you. I do want to
have kids in the next few years. I do want
to get married. I'm not pressuring you, but that's my intention.
So if you're not intentionally dating me to do those things,
please leave me to fuck along. Okay, damn man, cool by,
I fuck with you.

Speaker 4 (46:01):
Shit, I don't know yet what I want to do.

Speaker 2 (46:04):
Y'all always know, don't y'all don't know if y'all want
to take a girl serious. If y'all was just gonna fuck,
y'all know, I want to fuck it.

Speaker 3 (46:11):
Oh bad, That's just what it is.

Speaker 2 (46:13):
Doesn't matter if you hit it on the first day
or the tenth day, does it really or three months later?
Just you It don't matter. I thought so either really
have a time limit on when I'm an sweep with somebody.
It's just a feeling.

Speaker 3 (46:23):
Yeah, nah, for sure, I'm saying if I mean, if
I met you and we were both single and you
said all those things to me, and I said, but babe,
I fuck with you, but I ain't.

Speaker 4 (46:34):
I don't want to lie because I am. I'm just
out here chilling right now.

Speaker 2 (46:39):
I appreciate that though, So that means now you're on
my roster, and now I got you and a couple
of other ones because now I know that you're not
completely serious and you're not intentional yet. So now you
come to this is this is where you are my
roster because you didn't lie to me. So now you're
number one on my roster. And now I got like,
you know, two three four or five six.

Speaker 3 (46:57):
But then you know, when a nigga a nigga a
nigga still though, dudes, it just fucked up how niggas do.
So soon as as soon as I know that that
you still fuck with me up, I said that I
don't want you to have two three four, Why that's
just how I go.

Speaker 2 (47:13):
So you want to be narratory and you don't even
know if you're ready.

Speaker 3 (47:16):
No, you gotta get me ready.

Speaker 2 (47:19):
You see, I'm scratching my head over here.

Speaker 3 (47:21):
Just how I go?

Speaker 2 (47:23):
God, mathis insane. You don't say that's crazy.

Speaker 4 (47:26):
It is, but it ain't.

Speaker 3 (47:29):
It ain't because how you gonna tell me you're gonna
be my wife when you're not being a wife? A
girlfriend is a wife off a rip?

Speaker 2 (47:40):
Okay, okay, So I got a question for you because
I keep hearing this topic. Why am I doing wifely
duties when you're not doing husband duties? You expect for
me to show you that I'm a wife off rip,
but you're not doing anything that a husband does provide
and protect. But you want me to do everything that
a wife does.

Speaker 3 (47:58):
Explain that to me, because, uh, women mature furthered with
But you're faster than be here, So baby, you gotta
show be the route.

Speaker 2 (48:11):
That is why we always gotta teach y'all some shit.
I'm tired to teach your niggas. I'm tired like I'm exhucty.
I'm sorry, I was having a breakdown of y'all. I
have fucking sired. You keep having to teach somebody how
to treat me Like what did y'all, mamas do They didn't.
They didn't put that within y'all. I'm so confused. Why

(48:31):
I have to give you the path to Candyland when
we should be doing it together. You should be trying
to big up me and I should be trying to
big up you, and we should be always going back
and forth, Like why I gotta keep like pouring into you,
And now my cup is running empty and you trying
to take more and more and you got three four
holes in the back that's also doing it. That's not fair.
It sucks, like and to be a beautiful woman, and

(48:54):
you know what I'm saying, trying to figure the shit out?
And now that slept with you out in dag you
for six months now and fuck you moved on and
then I meet somebody else. Am I like supposed to
do this all over again. It's like a cycle. It's like,
at what point do I like the shit just stops
and we just like figure the shit out, Like I
just want to get to the point where I meet
somebody who is ready to figure it out with me

(49:14):
and we're gonna go through the trenches together and it's
just like a mutual respect and understanding but you.

Speaker 3 (49:19):
Probably met that person, but then allow yourself to be
the person for that person to turn into that person.

Speaker 2 (49:27):
That's fair, possibly because.

Speaker 4 (49:30):
At the end of the day, you are already think
any niggas ain't shit.

Speaker 3 (49:34):
You coming to it if you come into a.

Speaker 2 (49:35):
Situation think that. I don't think niggas ain't shit. I
think there's some niggas who are shit out there. I
just think they live further away in day long, Hey
don't work. So I'm trying to find somebody in Atlanta. Goddamn.

Speaker 3 (49:49):
So I'm saying the niggas in Atlanta. Ye, you mean
you're really looking at it, like, oh, what it's about
to be. If a nigga asks you out of something,
you're gonna be like, what do you want?

Speaker 2 (50:00):
No, I don't care like that. I like to have fun,
so I like to go out so and the thing
about it is, I don't really need to go on
a super expensive date. I think from working in retail
for so long and working for those big companies, like
I went to all these hotty, tidy, fancy restaurants and
the food is nasty. So I like to do fun stuff.
I love football, I love basketball. Take me to a
game we can go watch the game at the bar.
Like I'm really into that, you know what I'm saying.

(50:20):
I like to do things that are activities and that
shows me, like if you are socially awkward and if
you have continents of listening skills, I don't need to
sit across from you at dinner. That's not gonna do
nothing for me. I want to be active. I want
to see if your brain. Your brain works, so I
do go on dates to try to get another perspective,
because perspective we've I'm really trying to figure this out

(50:41):
and I don't think I have all the answers, which
is why I wanted to sit with you, because I
feel like you you your niggage done them answers because
you've been there.

Speaker 3 (50:49):
You didn't. Yeah, but I'm speaking for the niggas. I'm
standing on the side of the niggas, and I want
you to.

Speaker 2 (50:54):
I want you to.

Speaker 3 (50:54):
I want you to stay shoot down women, y'all, y'all
gotta understand it tastes.

Speaker 2 (50:58):
So then why y'all be moving fucking fast and telling
me I want you to be only see, I'm fucking
why we gotta do all that? You know, I'm not
you only.

Speaker 3 (51:05):
Inter see you fucking I'm trying to be a trust
I'm trying to. I'm trying to. I'm trying to convince myself.
I'm trying to commit myself that I can do this,
but you really don't want to, So just be it.
Ain't that a nigga don't want to. It's just a nigga.
Just some nigga just can't sometimes.

Speaker 2 (51:21):
Why no, no, no, you said they can't hit. Why
where's the why?

Speaker 3 (51:26):
I don't know. It's all self control.

Speaker 2 (51:29):
So I got to wait to a man forty five
and he like on his left flight, I ain't on
my left No, no, no, no, So God, Okay, So this
is a known fact, you guys. Attention, attention, attention. We
are with perspectives with bank forty men, forty year old men.
That's when y'all hit, y'all prime. That forty to fifty
is when y'all live your best life.

Speaker 3 (51:47):
Y'all.

Speaker 2 (51:48):
Look y'all best, y'all, money's the best at all the things.
So I gotta wait. So man, is forty five plus
for him to actually want to settle down?

Speaker 3 (51:57):
No, you gotta get sixty?

Speaker 2 (51:59):
Is crazy?

Speaker 3 (52:02):
Yeah, these niggas still got damn shaking. They tail fellas
for the ship. I know some niggas six still know.
But what the thing about it is what people don't.
My my opinion on this is it's harder when you're

(52:22):
of age and you've matured so far, because it's like.

Speaker 4 (52:28):
You've already been through so much shit. So it's gonna
have to them. They'll be like magic.

Speaker 3 (52:36):
And magic rarely happenings wh people do it, but it
has to be magic. If not, it's gonna be hard work.
You have to meet this person and really meet them,
not meet like you said the first the mask. You
gotta really meet a person and see can you deal
with that person? We were trying to deal with the person.
Meet the person to try to deal with who we

(52:57):
think they should be.

Speaker 2 (52:58):
You know, you know, your absolutely right. I think I
want when I date people, I date them for the
potential that I see inside of them and who I
want them to be, versus really hearing what they tell me,
like watch or you know what actions because people say
a lot and then they start you look at the actions.
You like, this don't add up. But then you like
the person so much and you vibing with them and
don't let the sex be good. It's a rap because

(53:20):
now you're caught up in the soul ties and you
lie damn, like I really fuck with this person, And
to be honest with you, you should just kind of
let that go. We do that. Look look at that. Okay,
self awareness cool to shape, that's all right, Yeah, But
like I also believe in a fairy tale like why
can't me somebody and they get me off my feet? No,

(53:40):
don't say that, you really think that.

Speaker 3 (53:43):
Yes, everything is hard, anything worth having is hard. Work
fair to you're gonna find out he been had baby
all he been doing the baby.

Speaker 2 (53:54):
But okay, okay, okay, so okay. So there's a situation
where you be with somebody for four or five years
and they're still a mask of themselves, and by year
six now you're looking at them like, damn, I didn't
even know who because.

Speaker 3 (54:06):
It happens sometimes you can't keep no masks on them.

Speaker 2 (54:09):
Well, they say, honestly, and I don't know. You can
tell me if this is true. You date somebody for
six months and by the seventh month you finally meet
who they really are and not the representative of that.
So now I feel like I just got to take
all these niggas do a six month try run.

Speaker 3 (54:23):
Not mean that you just gotta believe, you just gotta.
Y'all say intuition is one hundred percent right, right.

Speaker 2 (54:28):
I don't like my intuition to be right because I
be thinking everybody up to no good. I don't trust
nobody and I don't want I don't want to. I
don't want to be that person. I don't want to
think that a man is always lying to me, because
then I don't think that always is.

Speaker 3 (54:42):
Niggas.

Speaker 2 (54:45):
What am I going?

Speaker 4 (54:46):
Some nigga ain't lying when the nigga guess what the
nigga who you say?

Speaker 3 (54:49):
He out his mind? That's your niggagat line. See, y'all,
women talk to a nigga and be like this nigga's
out in his line. He the one being truthful.

Speaker 2 (54:57):
So I'm saying, you gonna find somebody and get this
twenty percent or what?

Speaker 3 (55:01):
He even liars? Who I though?

Speaker 2 (55:05):
Just sent me on like two blind dates? Okay, but
Marial don't like I don't need them, like.

Speaker 3 (55:10):
I don't know such your burbergree.

Speaker 2 (55:12):
You can carry conversations.

Speaker 3 (55:13):
I got you, I got you for real, But you
can't come into this ship looking at these people for
what something? Talking about this? Do you here what I
just said? Because I was trying to make a point.

Speaker 2 (55:26):
You were going somewhere with it too.

Speaker 3 (55:27):
I felt what I said. I don't know. Y'all went
to sleep. What I say.

Speaker 2 (55:35):
You said you can't come into it, and then you
said you was gonna stop. We were talking about meeting
people and meeting them where they're at, and then we
were talking about the six months, and we were talking
about how like the guy who's out of his mind,
that's the one that really sells you who he is.

Speaker 3 (55:51):
I was, I was, I was thinking about a fairy tale.
You say that ship don't happen.

Speaker 4 (55:57):
You left the guy who was your farit, who was
truthful to you, but he was.

Speaker 2 (56:01):
Also a cheater. Listen, Okay. My thing is, if you
are gonna sheep like, don't let me find out for
real like and I knows.

Speaker 3 (56:14):
Women what they want with what, but because you know,
if you cheated, he would never find never. That's what
I'm saying, every nigga, That's what I'm saying.

Speaker 2 (56:22):
But you know what, I respect you enough to not
even put you in a place or position to hurt
your feelings, and I've hurt somebody else's feelings over yours.

Speaker 3 (56:30):
Any day.

Speaker 4 (56:30):
That's what you want, you want you, you want you.

Speaker 2 (56:34):
I just don't want to me how the niggas ain't.

Speaker 4 (56:39):
Niggas don't know how to Niggas don't Niggas are stupid.

Speaker 2 (56:42):
They are, and I just want like or just like be.
If you be honest about who you are, then I'm
gonna fuck with you. I'm right with you because there
there's something, there might be something that I'm willing to
put up with when I know that you're being honest
with me. But when you lie to me now, I
feel like you're insulting my intelligence. I agree with that,
and it's like I don't want my man to have
another woman. I want him to cheat. But if my

(57:03):
man out here and he not disrespects me, he not
even making me feel like he's doing that, maybe I'm
not even gonna question you.

Speaker 4 (57:08):
They always feel like you're doing So.

Speaker 3 (57:10):
You can meet a nigga, you can meet a nigga
to day and everything be perfect, and you'd be like
this shit too perfect.

Speaker 2 (57:14):
No, se y'all wouldn't because I want to be I
want to be delusional. I want to think that. I
want to be happy, Babby. I want to be in
La la land. Your man. I just saw your man, impossible.
He told me he was with Fanks. Wasn't with you?
He test me and told me he was with Bank.
That's where he was. I'm not question Let me tell
you me. Let me take you some game to get
to Mia and Dago Lopez. Akaa, honey, if you are

(57:37):
consistent with me, you tell me what you're doing. You
tell me where you're going. I'm not calling you. You
said I'm with Bank tonight, you with Bank to go
home by five o'clock. Bet, Why am I harassing you?
You're gonna do what you want to do regardless.

Speaker 3 (57:49):
That's rare.

Speaker 2 (57:50):
So it's like for me, I'm not harassing you. If
we share locations and you said you're at this house,
you could be with a bitch. I would never know
because you told me that's where you were, and that's
where I knew you were. And as long as you
don't come to me as a woman, there's nothing like
uncle live in. And I'm being funny and people probably
gonna get on me for that, but let's be honest.
Like if my man tells me what he's doing when
he's doing it. I'm not going to seek for nothing

(58:13):
all and how you make me feel if you provide
and protect me and you make me feel safe, you
make me feel love. You don't disrespect me. You don't
go distant because you're getting some new pussy. What what?
What am I gonna go looking for?

Speaker 3 (58:24):
I'm happy?

Speaker 2 (58:26):
But you know what, y'all don't know how to do that.
Y'all start getting some new flavors, y'all to move from
pineapple or strawberry. And now you acting different, And then
women pick up on patterns. So if your pattern is
not the same, you're not loving me the same. You're
not giving me the same energy. You're not checking in
like you used to. Baby, I already know you're doing
something or someone else, or your mind is not on me,
and I'm not doing my job.

Speaker 3 (58:46):
So that's what's gonna make you unhappy.

Speaker 2 (58:47):
That's what's gonna make me unhappy. Not because you're out
here doing whatever you're doing when you're not with me.
But I ain't what sue you did get caught because
I already know on my mind because you acting different.
You could have made it up I could have just
took a loss or something. You don't know what going on,
So then tell me, baby, I took a loss and
I don't want to talk. I'm gonna stress if you
If you don't tell me, hey, this is what's going on.
You don't have to tell me exactly what happened. You

(59:07):
would just say I'm fucked up right now. I got
a lot going on, and I'm gonna give your space
because I had it.

Speaker 3 (59:12):
Yeah, but you can't.

Speaker 4 (59:15):
Most of the time women won't.

Speaker 3 (59:18):
No, that's not enough.

Speaker 2 (59:20):
That's some women were talking about Mia and day Open, okay,
talking about because when niggas broke, they're angry.

Speaker 3 (59:27):
Because a lot of niggas will say, hey, man, I
don't want to talk about that. What you mean what publers?
We were supposed to talk about this.

Speaker 2 (59:33):
It's it's not okay. So what I've always learned is
not what you say, is how you say it. So
if you say, baby, honestly, right now, I really can't talk.
I'm kind of fucked up and got none to do.
What you gotta do with some losses, and I'm gonna
talk to you about it later, but right now I
just need my time.

Speaker 3 (59:46):
What the fuck.

Speaker 2 (59:46):
Am I gonna say, Oh my god, no talk to
me no like a right, I'm gonna leave you alone.

Speaker 3 (59:51):
Bye.

Speaker 2 (59:51):
I love you. You know what I'm saying. But if
you might an attitude you being nasty to me? Ye a, nigga,
what the fuck is up?

Speaker 3 (59:56):
Yo?

Speaker 2 (59:57):
Your other bitch is mad at you?

Speaker 3 (59:58):
Now?

Speaker 2 (59:59):
Now I have win. I had created a whole story
in my head. That's not even the narative.

Speaker 3 (01:00:02):
That's crazy.

Speaker 2 (01:00:03):
But I don't think people are honest about what's going
on with them. And even when it comes to finances,
you mad at me because you took a loss one
you could have just don't take it. I don't mean
nigga disappear. Hey babe, I'm about to go into my
room for a little bit like I need. I'm going
to my man cave. I need a second. It's all
about communication. You get more with honey than vinegar any
day of the week. You know what I'm saying. And
I think if God's understood that because y'all don't know

(01:00:25):
how to cope with your emotions, like y'all are the
most emotionally unemotionally available people. If y'all weren't able to
process things and say look, I need a moment. It's
not you. I love you. Give me a kiss on
the forehead, but I can't fuck with you right now
because I'm mad about some other shit. We gonna leave
y'all alone, But y'all be like, I can't tie right now?
Why the fuck you bitching? That's why I'm bitching. Nigga
was wrong with you? Like now you got an attitude

(01:00:48):
and I'm thinking I'm finna give you something you don't
even want nothing now. I think you chat, but in reality,
you took an l and so you ain't thinking about
no pussy because your money fucked up. But you didn't
want to tell me that because you're what You're intimidated
to say that. You're embarrassed. Tell yo, bitch, hey my
money fucker. We can't do X, Y and Z. I
can't make it happen, baby, Instead of trying to lie
and go broke over something that you shouldn't because you're
not communicating with the person that you're with, y'all lack

(01:01:09):
accountability and communication with us, and in return, we turned
into little devils. Okay, did I lie?

Speaker 3 (01:01:17):
It just sounds I'm telling you.

Speaker 2 (01:01:19):
Better try it.

Speaker 3 (01:01:21):
Okay, ultraally communication.

Speaker 4 (01:01:23):
I'm a communicator, he said, exactly what it is.

Speaker 3 (01:01:26):
They're just like, yeah, I just unless I.

Speaker 4 (01:01:28):
Know it ain't gonna go nowhere, then it ain't nothing
to say.

Speaker 2 (01:01:31):
That's fair.

Speaker 3 (01:01:31):
If it ain't nothing. If I know this is something
that I might not even say this, that's fair. And
I just learned something earlier the night too. I just
everything's my fault from this point on, if I'm talking
to a woman or a kid. I just had an
interview with my dog fish and grits, he said, a
man can if you go back from anything dealing with

(01:01:55):
a woman, you'll find something that you did wrong for
that woman to be like that exactly what you're saying.
So so for now.

Speaker 2 (01:02:03):
I'm sorry. Even when you're not sorry, you wanna get.
You gonna get a lot further in life.

Speaker 3 (01:02:08):
Yeah, it's just like, that's.

Speaker 4 (01:02:09):
What not not just even in a relationship.

Speaker 3 (01:02:11):
That's what this. You got it? I don't want that.
I don't need it, bro And if it and if
it comes in a form that I can't shake it
with you, I just gotta shake you. It's just what
it is like. And I know I've been saying you
got it. They even keep having it listen.

Speaker 2 (01:02:31):
No, that's fair. That's fair. Like I mean, I think
a lot of times women will find a way, even
if we're in the wrong for something, I will limit,
We'll figure out a way to manipulate the situation and
make it about how you piss us off, and we'll
we'll put two things that don't connect and we'll connect
them for sure. But it's because you've done something to
upset us, and now we gotta make it make sense.

(01:02:52):
Why why we're acting crazy? You're right. Listen, Sometimes y'all
to say one point for you, you're right, It happens. But
it also boils down to the fact that I don't
be honest about what everything y'all lie about, what color
draws y'all have on.

Speaker 3 (01:03:04):
It, y'all, I don't tell about it. I just don't talk.

Speaker 2 (01:03:08):
That's lying by all mission. Because sometimes when you don't
say anything, that's also a lie, when you beat things out.

Speaker 3 (01:03:15):
When you if a question is asked, I'm an answer,
but yeah, yeah, I'm not gonna volunteer it and I'm
not gonna I'm not gonna expound on a yes or
no answer.

Speaker 2 (01:03:28):
So what does she ask the open ended question?

Speaker 3 (01:03:30):
What's the over ended question.

Speaker 2 (01:03:32):
Like I'll ask you something like, well, what did you
do yesterday? That's not a yes or no question?

Speaker 3 (01:03:38):
You mean change my dream like every day? What are
you talking about? You ain't gonna see no girls if
it's a no no, what if it's a yes, you did,
I don't go see girls.

Speaker 2 (01:03:52):
You don't see girls? No, No, that's there. Okay, So.

Speaker 3 (01:03:58):
How that is gonna be a year?

Speaker 2 (01:04:03):
Asking them tell a question? Yeah, I want to go
fuck he like I went to see my business partner,
like asking them type of women ask the most craziest question.

Speaker 3 (01:04:11):
That's crazy. I ain't never been asked no ship like that.

Speaker 2 (01:04:13):
I mean you gotta like I literally women have been
asked the most, like I have homeboys and the girls
would ask questions and he'd be like, I'm just with honey,
and they'd be like, it's okay if it's me, but
if it's somebody else, they'd be flying off the handle
because they know I don't. I don't see what my friends.
My friends are my friends, and that's it. I don't.
I don't like have that old that was my big
brother and I slept with him. No, we're not doing
that like I'd like my prince to be my friends,

(01:04:35):
like I need my homies to be my homies.

Speaker 3 (01:04:37):
But yeah, dress, he can get it if he's and.

Speaker 2 (01:04:39):
He was, Oh my god, if he was a real
man and not the girl, that would be my man.
We stayed all the time. He tells me if I was,
He said, why wasn't I want a boy? And I'll
be like, well, nigga, why would you want a real nigga?

Speaker 3 (01:04:50):
Like, what's up? You get to the left?

Speaker 1 (01:04:53):
What then?

Speaker 2 (01:04:54):
Okay? But I love him because I feel like that's
the only man who loved me how you're supposed to.
But that's my best friend, like, and so I pray
for a straight man that loves me like my best
friend loves me. He very honest with me though. He
tell me what I'm wrong. He tell me when I'm
full of shit, he tells me when I'm doing the
right thing. And he just said he wants me to
understand my quality and who I am and stop dating now.

Speaker 3 (01:05:15):
Damn.

Speaker 2 (01:05:16):
He was like, he doesn't think that I date for
the caliber of woman that I am. And as I
continue to grow on my platform, I have to be
more selective about who I surround myself with. And that
was hurtful when he said it, but he was honest,
like I don't date to the caliber what I should.

Speaker 3 (01:05:34):
So let me ask you some If you if you
did have a dude like him with that honest, could
you take it? Yeah? I already know you can't. You
just left do when he said he wasn't.

Speaker 2 (01:05:44):
Because I was a bigg end and he didn't do
anything to make sure.

Speaker 3 (01:05:47):
That you got to see. But what you got, you
got an explanation with the same thing.

Speaker 2 (01:05:52):
Now it's different because you can sit here and tell
me you're not attracted to me anymore because of this.
But if you weren't, I canner say. If he said
that I'm not attracted to you because of this, and
I've been trying to help you get there, but you
don't see it, okay, then it's like, okay, I get it.
But for you to just sit here and continue to
eat with me, and continue to do things with me,
continue to see me suffering mentally, emotionally, physically, and you

(01:06:14):
not to do nothing about it, but tell me you
you upset about it when I was fucking with you
when you was broken.

Speaker 3 (01:06:18):
You have shit.

Speaker 2 (01:06:19):
It's crazy to me.

Speaker 3 (01:06:20):
But did he say? But did he say he didn't
want to be with you.

Speaker 2 (01:06:22):
He said he was no longer attracted to me. So
in my mind, you're gonna go out there and find
somebody you were attracted to. Why would you want to
be with somebody you're not attracted to? That's crazy. I
don't I don't want to be with someone I'm not
attracted to because now you love me because you love
the person I am, but you're not in love with me.
And I don't never want to be with someone who's
not in love with me. Yeah, you know what I'm saying.
And I want someone who genuinely likes me and loves me.

(01:06:44):
I want both. So it's like, I want to be
with a man who is going to be blatantly honest
with me and be respectful when you do it, because
I'm gonna do the same. But also, if you have
the tools to make me successful but you're complaining about
what I'm doing, then what are we doing? And as
a woman, if you have the tools to help your
man be successful, why the fuck are you complaining and
you're not helping? You have to be a helpmate. So

(01:07:05):
I was just raised it. I literally was raised differently,
and I just think that I'm a diamond in the
rough and eventually I meet whoever that person is who
likes me and loves the fact that I danced on
tables and you know, I wrap my lyrics and I'm
still Saditi. I'm all the things and more. And I
just feel like people only want to see what they
want to see.

Speaker 3 (01:07:23):
So it's just like they don't just want to see
what they want to judge. They don't want to see
what they can apply. They won't to see what they
can do.

Speaker 2 (01:07:30):
So I was just like, until then, I'm cool with
being by myself until I find that person. But I'm
not bitter and I'm not angry. I just think whatever's
out there, my husband might be in Tahiti, I was
just probably in the wrong island.

Speaker 3 (01:07:43):
But are you are you?

Speaker 4 (01:07:44):
Are you receiving these people though.

Speaker 2 (01:07:47):
I'm willing to. I think I'm more open now. I
used to never date people with kids, and now I'm
open to it because I'm thirty five and everybody gotta
pick me. You know what I mean? That means a child,
but everybody as a child. So I think I'm more
receptive to dating people with kids. But it's all in
how you treat your kids too. You can't have no
kids and not taking care of your kids. That's a

(01:08:08):
no go for me. But you know, for real, if
you not being a father, then you can't. Why would
I have a baby with you so you can start
just trend all over again. I'm not trying to be
a single parent out here in these streets if I
can avoid it.

Speaker 3 (01:08:22):
Yeah, you know what I'm saying. What you want, but
look good.

Speaker 2 (01:08:26):
I want a boy so I can go to all
the football, track, baseball, whatever he want to play all
the games and be a boy mom. I would say,
I don't want a little girl. I just think it's
hard being a woman. I know, y'all hear us complain
about black women are the most disrespected, and I think
you know, I appreciate how you love on black women
and what you said to me earlier, like you think

(01:08:46):
black women are so beautiful because a lot of times
we're told we're not that beautiful, that they would rather
go find a other that has that that mimics us,
dresses like us, gets their bodies like us, but are
not us, and then they put them on a pedestal.
I have no problem with people dating outside of their race.
That's cool, do it, you know, whatever your love is,
but still also love a black woman, which is why

(01:09:09):
I have a problem with a lot of football players.
They put these white women on pedestals and make it
seem like they're these snow queens are the best things
known to men, and then you deemed down and y'a
mama black as fuck, Like I need you to love
black women, but also say I love my white women,
but I love Black women and it's just it's very
sad because our men don't even love us. We get
treated better by the others, which is crazy, seem But

(01:09:33):
I love black men what I love and I want
to rough like you feel like we don't respect y'all.

Speaker 4 (01:09:40):
I don't know, because niggas done, niggas done, intending to many.

Speaker 3 (01:09:44):
Lives and shit, neigga donet being niggas like not like
I said, back to accountability, Niggas being niggas.

Speaker 2 (01:09:52):
Do you feel like most men don't understand that the
family dynamic and they don't want families.

Speaker 3 (01:09:58):
I think niggas want families.

Speaker 4 (01:10:00):
It's I think I think niggas want family.

Speaker 3 (01:10:03):
It's just hard to see, like it would be hard
to see you without you talking what you mean explain, like,
see you for who you are, Like if I just
saw you, I'm just gifted. So I can see people.
That's like a lot of people that I have on
this I just I just admired them from afar and

(01:10:23):
then call reach out and get them on hand so
I can have a conversation. I already be done solve you.
But most people are hard to see you because of
how you look.

Speaker 2 (01:10:32):
You know, I don't want to cry, but I really
want to shut it here because I always say I
just want somebody to see me, like I really want
them to like see how beautiful I am inside, not
exterior but interior for sure.

Speaker 3 (01:10:44):
But that's hard to see because most people that look
like you on the outside be this way. Got you
and these niggas been dealing with that, so it's like
it's the same thing regardless. Yeah, and it takes too long.
And like you said, if I met another girl that
wasn't like you but look like you, but she thought
like this, she's gonna she's gonna show me this in

(01:11:06):
the beginning. Yeah, right, she gonna show me because she
know how to be that too, but who she is
is something different, and the niggas already went through heartbreak,
went through God damn and been loving when I fun
went through, went through went through same ship. That's a
wall we go through.

Speaker 2 (01:11:23):
I just think I keep inhering people that like are
bruised and battered. I don't know what it is and
I don't know what it is about me, but I
attract men that need savingture. I am so okay, so okay, listen,
none no jokes asidey. So I've always said that I'm
a helpmate, but I think I'm gonna help make to
my friends too, Like I'm an impath. So when I

(01:11:44):
reached out to you about you know, I said, I
felt compelled to say what I said to you. And
I don't have to repeat what I said, but I
felt compelled because you didn't need me, but in my mind,
I had to because I just want you to, you know,
hear it from somebody else, like if nobody's told you this,
because you would think that people will say that if
nobody told you, just this is what it is. And
when it comes to men that I meet, I hear

(01:12:05):
their stories and I just want to fix them. I
want to figure out a way to make them happy
so that they can see the value in themselves. But
don't nobody else do that for me? Nobody helps me
see the value in me. I do it for myself.
My friends do what I mean from like a dating standpoint,
and I just want people to do what I do
for them to me. I've never had that family, and
it sucks. I'm being honest, you would think as attractive

(01:12:27):
as I am, as fun as I am, I don't know.
I think I'm just not attracting the right men. And
I think maybe now I am because I have more
of a discerning spirit. But sometimes I just they really
be a wolf in sheep's clothing and they put on
an act like they that, but they not at So
what I gotta do?

Speaker 3 (01:12:45):
Move?

Speaker 2 (01:12:45):
I don't want to move. I love Atlanta. This is
the Black Mecca. Were not gonna get this nowhere else.
I'm sorry.

Speaker 4 (01:12:50):
Yeah, could you go get in and bring here that
you're gonna.

Speaker 3 (01:12:52):
Get turned that?

Speaker 2 (01:12:54):
Not if I leave a lot in the care and
again't come up to the city, leaving fast out here
on where with chapel. You stay out here, back your
Stone Mountain, It's okay, go to Pirates. Then it cannot
come to the city because it's like twenty other badies.

Speaker 3 (01:13:07):
That look like me.

Speaker 2 (01:13:09):
I'm like, yeah, Ima seen my sister. Yeah, so you're
gonna get chrag of fuck out you asking me? Right?
I asked this one guy that I was talking to.
I was like, he was in Miami. I was like,
would you move here? He was like the home is wherever,
like wherever I lay my head. So yeah, I moved
to Atlanta if that's what you wanted me to do.
And I'm like, okay, I guess ever, Maright have you here?

Speaker 3 (01:13:31):
I think I think man me personally. My advice to
sing women is they stop it shit with Marian.

Speaker 2 (01:13:43):
We're listening to.

Speaker 3 (01:13:45):
Some I'm gonna give I'm gonna get some to both.
My advice to singing women is you can't put a
look on your person. You ain't gonna know what he
looked like this because he ain't gonna come in on
him of what he looked like. Let's never come how
you thought they was gonna call.

Speaker 2 (01:14:06):
I want to love him, give choice.

Speaker 4 (01:14:10):
You gotta give him a chance.

Speaker 2 (01:14:11):
And I don't even need to cut you off, but
I want to like he. He don't got to be
fine to everybody else. And y'all come to me, But
he gotta be fine to me, Like I want to
like look at him and I want that lust and
lust like I want to look at him and be like,
I want you getting aked right now.

Speaker 4 (01:14:26):
But you can meet a guy right and not have
it at first, and then when you start fucking with him,
you can get no.

Speaker 2 (01:14:31):
Baby, you gots how to test the product?

Speaker 3 (01:14:34):
What's saying?

Speaker 2 (01:14:35):
What I gotta know? Because sex is forty five percent
of a relationship to me, So ify five, Yeah, forty
is good, fifty fifty, fifty percent. Let's be honest. Seventy
is seventy Sex can't be seventy percent eighty all right

(01:14:56):
for me, honey, Lopez is a fifty percent of a relationship.
If we are not sexually compatible and you not ready
to turn me out, we're not doing this.

Speaker 3 (01:15:07):
Damn No. I agree with.

Speaker 2 (01:15:08):
That point blank period that stops everything else. I just
don't look like it and be that how you I
gotta be. Sex is mental for me, So it's not physical,
like it's because I'm having sex with you as so
why I'm turned on and now I'm climaxing. It has
nothing to do with what you look like. Has everything
to do with the mental studio exactly, saying, so I

(01:15:29):
got to be mentally stimulate by the way you talk,
the way you smell, in the way your body looks. Okay,
if I don't have those three things, it's never gonna work.
I don't care how much money you have. I money, money, money,
don't make me come sorry, I'm not with you, ladies.
That does not do it for me. I have to
like you have to you have to talk to me,
and when you're talking to me, I'm like in it.

Speaker 3 (01:15:50):
Yeah, man, So that's another that she take your two
percent down to that.

Speaker 2 (01:15:57):
I know zero point five five five foss.

Speaker 3 (01:16:01):
You see for zero zero zero zero point one there No,
I know. Yeah, they're going to get a girl, and they.

Speaker 2 (01:16:10):
Like to fight their girls like it's tessil and I
don't want to fight. You ain't messing up my hair.
They want to fight when they mad at you, when
you don't want to do this no more. I see
too many like girl fights and then they argue with
your girlfriend, and you know you can fight your girl
because y're both women, right, I'll do that. I'll put
my hands on men, and I don't want to want
to put her in on me. So I'm just I
don't know.

Speaker 3 (01:16:30):
I think I'm gonna do.

Speaker 2 (01:16:31):
I'm gonna try to celibacy though I think I'm about
to be abstinent, celibate all the things. Both of those,
I know they're two different things. I'm about to be both.

Speaker 3 (01:16:39):
Yeah.

Speaker 2 (01:16:40):
So accident is your abstaining from sex completely, like you're
taking it out of the equation and you're waiting until
like you're married. Celibacy is where you took a vow
to not have sex, but it doesn't have a time limit,
so you.

Speaker 3 (01:16:57):
Be celibacy for two days basically.

Speaker 2 (01:16:59):
I'm tried to six months. I know I'm gonna be
in a gym like crazy. I just got these cities done,
so pop out. It's a little one and I'm not
bow wow. I'm bout to my father of these sties
for the summer. We outside, thank we outside turns up
me and me and see and some marror be outside.
But yeah, I'm gonna try to stick moneys and see

(01:17:20):
if I last, I'll let you know.

Speaker 3 (01:17:23):
We're gonna put I'm finna put you on. I'm trying
to get this twenty percent.

Speaker 2 (01:17:27):
So yeah, so he put listen, he wants you ain't
want the stup, don't know they gotta be first of all,
you ain't she gotta make some money.

Speaker 3 (01:17:40):
Yeah, I ain't saying no, no nigga ain't. I'll do
what you won't. But he I'm gonna give a nigga
who done probably lied to me, you know what I'm saying,
for as uh for as he want to be in
the marriage or whatever. Now, I know some dudes though,
for real, I know some real good dude Okay, they

(01:18:01):
over shit together. Yeah nah, I got this ship together.
That d niggas be saying it, like, bro, I just
can't find no wife, same shit that women are saying.

Speaker 4 (01:18:09):
Good women are saying. Good niggas saying that too.

Speaker 2 (01:18:12):
How about for Valentine's Day, you have a dating with
Bank and you do like a speed dating thing, and
you get your single homeboys and really like upper echelon women,
and you put us together and we do like a
speed dating that's dope, and then you can really make
a whole show out of it, and then you can
really do perspectives with Bank while we're there.

Speaker 3 (01:18:30):
That's dope. Just saying oh nah, that's dope. You just
stopped that.

Speaker 2 (01:18:33):
I think it would be really dope, because if you're
saying you got friends who think the way I do,
even if it's just a meet and greet, it could
be networking.

Speaker 3 (01:18:42):
There's plenty of dudes like that. Man, Like the niggas
got this ship together, they just be like, man, he
is shit, though, bro.

Speaker 2 (01:18:48):
And they think that because they keep meeting the same
girls at the same places. To be honest with you, now.

Speaker 3 (01:18:54):
You can meet the mother forget that lot bearer.

Speaker 4 (01:18:55):
Man, he's the same shit.

Speaker 2 (01:18:57):
I have to stop dating people that I go to
the gym with because it wasn't working out.

Speaker 4 (01:19:01):
How did shit work after it don't work out in
the gym?

Speaker 2 (01:19:04):
So my ex go to the gym? Now? Wait, First
of all, I dated a trainer at my shit and
then we broke up. And then I started dating my
ex at the gym. You know him, But we can
talk about that later. When we broke up, because I
felt like he wasn't a provider and a protector, I said, hey,
were still kudo. I don't want no problems at the gym.
I don't need you talking bad about me like I

(01:19:25):
need us to be cool. He was like, not everything good?
I said, all right, I aim in back yet I
got I cut it one more mom, but you know
when I get back, if we y'all problems. But I
kill him up today and I was like, hey, I
just missed my friend. You know you gotta do that
because I don't want him going back and talking about me.
You know what I'm saying, Well, what do you a
he broaly ain't got in the swing?

Speaker 4 (01:19:44):
What are you gonna say?

Speaker 2 (01:19:45):
We when we broke up, we broke up on some
like it was. It wasn't good terms cause I just
felt like he told me that I was looking for
a handout, and I told him I'm looking for for
a provider. Never said I wasn't gonna work. But I
want my man to be able to feel like he
can support me and take care of because when you're
an entrepreneur and what you were doing, what we're doing,
it's a hit or miss. You never know. We can
be up one minute, down one another. I need a

(01:20:07):
support system and if you can.

Speaker 3 (01:20:08):
But he just didn't have it.

Speaker 2 (01:20:10):
He does have it. He an engineer, ain't here in
the game like here producer. It's not like he's poor.
He has his shit together. He just feel like talking
about some I just feel like you know, you're looking
for a handout and nothing in life is free. See
red flag. Now I'm done because what what are we
talking about?

Speaker 4 (01:20:28):
Why you You should have just finished the communication.

Speaker 3 (01:20:30):
You could have hurried him out from his perspective, like
I said, at the end of the day, if he
walked like a duck. But they said, yeah, what it's
the same. So now he is too much pressure, too.

Speaker 4 (01:20:47):
Fast nigga thinking like, oh, it's the same thing.

Speaker 3 (01:20:50):
No, no, no, no, no, I'll tell you how a nigga
go to thinking.

Speaker 2 (01:20:52):
But I was honest about what I wanted from the start,
like we talked about. I didn't just magically tell him
this six months later. I told him this six months ago.

Speaker 3 (01:21:00):
What happened though to the last crow? How the last
crow get the last straw got there?

Speaker 2 (01:21:04):
Because I felt like he always wanted me to like
if like I told him, I needed to go. My
mentor had tickets to the Falcons game, and so he
had people in there, like in the industry music and
entertainment industry that he wanted me to meet. He was like,
I know you're doing your podcasts and your things, and
I know you need sponsors. Let me you know what
I'm saying, go ahead, and like Woodie Woop, I told

(01:21:27):
him I was going. He said, you can't give me
a ticket. No, this is a business opportunity for me.
This is not about you. Oh you being selfish? Oh
why so you ain't worried about your nigga. No, I'm
not worried about my nigga. I'm worried about me trying
to get put on. So because I wouldn't ask you
if somebody said, if you told me your mentor was
taking you to X, Y and Z. Oh, you know

(01:21:49):
what I'm saying, It's not like what you said.

Speaker 3 (01:21:51):
He invited you. You said he's taking you. You went
with him.

Speaker 2 (01:21:53):
I went with my mentor. He had an extra ticket.
He was like, I want you to go. Oh he
was like, can he get a ticket for me? This
is not about you, This is not it's different. It's business.
You know what I'm saying. Like and if if you
have business, even when you go out with your friends,
I don't include myself. You can include me, but I
don't think I'm supposed to tack along with my dude
everywhere you go. If you want to include me, great,
but if you don't, it's cool. Because that's your time,

(01:22:14):
because when you come back, I want you to want
to come home. I want you to be like, Damn,
I gotta get back to my girl. You know what
I'm saying. So I think we was just getting discord
and I was getting angry and angrier. He would want
me to check in here and check in there. I
felt like I was saying a probation officer just wasn't
wasn't fun anymore. I ain't like that for see. I

(01:22:35):
felt like I had just got out of jail.

Speaker 4 (01:22:41):
You know you slowly slowly God, damn, what's up talking
to me?

Speaker 3 (01:22:46):
A feeling you slowly feeling it? Uh? What's your back?

Speaker 2 (01:22:51):
I don't like to be I don't like niggas to
keep tabs on me because I don't want to keep
tabs on you. We are wrong, baby, like checking once
or twice that day?

Speaker 3 (01:22:59):
That's you know that, Tim niggas you hold if you're
not chicking for me while I'm going and I a yang,
I can't check for you like you're coming home, baby,
you coming home? I agree with that. I agree with you.

Speaker 2 (01:23:10):
You five thirty am to get in this motherfucking house.
Thirty Yeah, it's alta house.

Speaker 3 (01:23:17):
That's just not for both of y'all.

Speaker 2 (01:23:20):
Why why can't my curfew be five thirty. I'm an
eye for.

Speaker 3 (01:23:22):
An eye each.

Speaker 2 (01:23:24):
We got to five thirty to get in the house.
It's Atlanta. You go to the club, you go to
the African hour hours while hey, you know what I'm saying.
You did a little one too, and then like you
go to walk the house where I hop you come home. Baby,
on on my way home back because you know, nine
times I said, like me, I love all the way
in and Powder Springs, So it's gonna take a hour
to get out of the city. So you got to
include the hour drive home. You don't say include that.

(01:23:46):
I think relationships will work so much better. People be
trying to like keep a leash on people, and when
you keep a leash, it makes nigga or female want
to cheat. But if you give me enough rope, baby,
I'm not gonna hang myself because you trust me enough,
and I'm now psychologically I want to come back home
because I know you wasn't doing too much. But when
you're doing too much now, I want to be bad
with my friends and ass staying on tables and then

(01:24:07):
when I go out you know I'm gonna be in
a nigga section. Stop tripping.

Speaker 3 (01:24:10):
I likes you gonna up fucked up? Man, go home?
Now what we're gonna do with? What did it to you? Honey?

Speaker 2 (01:24:16):
Hear me out though You've all always had bitches in
your section, and I'm gonna be okay with that. You
got to If you don't, it's gonna look strange to me.
It's an image. So have them I was in a
section and make sure they're cute and send me a
picture of two.

Speaker 3 (01:24:28):
I know that, but be.

Speaker 2 (01:24:29):
Respectful now, baby, I can't take you home. I got
a girl she gonna beat your ass, you know what
I'm saying, like realistically, And you know I'm gonna go
oll with my friends and I'm a bad bitch. You
know I'm not paying, So are you gonna make sure
we have a section? So either you're gonna give me
the money so that me and my girls can do
what we do, or I'm gonna go find a nigga
with the money so we can be in a section
so my girls can have a good time. And I'm
facilitating the whole little you know what I'm saying. Thing,
Let's be honest These are conversations people don't have.

Speaker 3 (01:24:51):
Yeah, but okay, that's a conversation. But then you telling
me you want me to get proposed.

Speaker 2 (01:24:56):
Yeah it, I love you, and you know I'm not
out here giving this Uhikuchi.

Speaker 3 (01:25:01):
I'm not dead.

Speaker 4 (01:25:02):
But it's just how it looks.

Speaker 2 (01:25:03):
It's it's an influencer, and I'm a content creator. I
need to be out that. See we're talking about we're
not talking about it.

Speaker 3 (01:25:10):
Let me work high moved. Yeah, let me work my
moods because next thing, Hello, you were.

Speaker 4 (01:25:17):
Sure, I'm thinking of a totally now if you still
were working that job.

Speaker 2 (01:25:21):
No, no, because even because of my job, I definitely
need to do it then because I need you to
come in my store and spend all your money. So
I need to be in your section because you're gonna work.

Speaker 3 (01:25:28):
This jivon, she ain't nowhere around you got okay, Yeah,
you got you got you.

Speaker 2 (01:25:32):
If I was a teacher, it's a little different like
my asking to be at home. But retail is the
same thing. Retail is the same hustle as a stripper.
You right, I gotta put on because when them dudes
come in my store, baby, they was flirting and I
was like, M twenty thousand dollars, you gotta give me
your money. Like it's the same thing. It's the same
kind of hustle. It's just a different hustle. Yeah, And
it's like you got to understand that about your girl, Like,

(01:25:52):
I know, if you're doing what you're doing, you're a producer,
you're doing that. I gotta be able to trust you.

Speaker 3 (01:25:55):
It's a fact.

Speaker 2 (01:25:57):
Like it's different now if I was a teacher and
you know, or I had a regular nine to five
at a bank, maybe it's a little bit dear fun.
But when you're out there and you're an influencer, you're
a creator, you know, you're a trainer, you're all these things,
everything is a moment for you the network and for
you to make more money and manifest a bigger income.

Speaker 3 (01:26:16):
But the thing about it is he's saying, basically, any
dudes you do date and be serious about, they just
gonna have.

Speaker 2 (01:26:23):
To trust you and trust because you never gonna lie
to you and you say you lead with trust every time.
And I'm gonna tell somebody, I got a man, and
I'm all about my man. What people would realize, I
don't care if he's the squarest of the square. If
I love him, I don't care who else don't like him,
like how Sierra loves Russell Wilson and everybody somebody, he's
such a square, I would love the fuck out of
that square. And I would tell everybody this is my square.

(01:26:43):
And I'm standing in ten Toes Town on my square, Like,
can't nobody make me leave my nigga if my nigga's
treated me how he's supposed to. No money, no man,
no nothing. I don't care who I got a crush on.
You can't make me leave somebody that's good to me
because all those other feelings are temporary and they're fleeting.
So no other man, I don't care how big he is,
can overstep and overshadow somebody that I see in their greatness.

(01:27:05):
And I just feel like I'm just gonna be out here,
you know, kicking my feet like this.

Speaker 4 (01:27:09):
Now, I'm gonna put you with some people. I'm gonna
let them link at this first so they can know.

Speaker 2 (01:27:16):
So my her ferst nality little strong, you know what
I'm saying. She fined too, but she mighty.

Speaker 3 (01:27:20):
I'm a brickhouse stone, nah nah, And I think you dope,
like just watching you online then seeing a person having
a conversation, I think you really dope and what you
stand for is really dope. So let's get back into
these my bodymins.

Speaker 2 (01:27:34):
Yeah, so you guys, I have bottom zons with by
the Star. I have the organic Sema stud is coming
out next week, the black Seed oil and honeygummies, and
the Silagit and Oshawa Ganda gummies that are coming out.
I'm super excited. You guys have to support me on Amazon.
It will be in my link. I'm definitely DM me
as well. I had a breast augmentation, so I'm gonna

(01:27:55):
have like a whole like docu series on the process
of healing and going through surgery the right way and
doing it positively. I'm in the midlike in my personal
trainer certification Gritto, when I go on these hikes with
you soon, because he does have a hike coming up.
You guys please make sure you check out banks hikes.
I want to be able to, like you know, encourage
people on them and letting them know I actually know

(01:28:16):
what I'm talking about. And then I will in the
middle getting my certifications to be a nutritional coach, and
I got my podcast bar Talk which I would love
to have you one. Yeah, and we're gonna do the
what we just I just for Valentine's Day, I signed
up for Talk cook and show. Yeah, cooking show and

(01:28:36):
the dating and the dating that you're gonna put on
is gonna be a night with Bank and he's gonna
do a speed dating that I'm going to curate a host.

Speaker 4 (01:28:44):
No, for sure, we gonna get you out. We're gonna
get some nice, good singles.

Speaker 2 (01:28:48):
But by then he would have already found me a man.
So I'm not gonna be included, but I'll be there
for more support. You find me somebody by Christmas.

Speaker 3 (01:28:57):
The telling people, did you tell them? What'll follow you?

Speaker 2 (01:29:00):
Oh? Okay, okay, okay you guys so sorry? Please follow
me on Instagram, Underscore Honey Lopez, I'm on TikTok hopefully
it lasts long. I had a journey with Honey on YouTube,
also journey with Honey with Low and I have Underscore
Bar Talk. So those are all my pages.

Speaker 4 (01:29:19):
NA make sure y'all go likes to strive and come
into the Big Fact Network.

Speaker 1 (01:29:24):
Another fac episode of Perspectives with Big Bank. Follow on
Instagram at Big Bank ato.

Speaker 3 (01:29:32):
Yo, don't miss an episode of Perspective with Bank. Perspective
with Bank or production of The Black Effect Podcast Network
and our executi producers are Dollar Bischo, Chanel Collins and
produced by Aaron A. King Howard What Up Game. For
more podcasts from iHeart Radio, visit to iHeart Radio, Apple Podcast.
Wherever you get your favorite shows. Make sure you follow
Big Bank ATL Perspective with Bank with a K. Make

(01:29:52):
sure you like to Strive, comment to the Big Fat Network.
Pay

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Big Bank

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