July 12, 2021 • 53 mins
Maksim and Val Chmerkovskiy are discussing life, love, dancing, and touring!
Maks and Val reveal what happens when they work together and disagree?
Rene explains what it was like working with his wife, Janet Jackson.
AJ admits how BSB figure things out when making decisions.
Then, they switch gears to new tattoos and handling failure.
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
I'm pretty bad. Hey, everybody, welcome to another episode a
(00:20):
pretty messed up on I Heart Radio. I am your host,
A J. McClean with my beautiful and one shoulder showing gauge,
co host share Beard and Mr Golf himself rocking a
very nice shirt. I must say what you guys will
(00:40):
be hearing a lot about very soon. Mr Ranee Lassando,
how about how about we hear about it now? I mean, look,
I'll just say this much. Um. You know, so I
actually played golf this morning and yesterday and yesterday was it.
Yesterday was the day before yesterday, day before yesterday. But
(01:00):
when I was playing this morning with my buddies, they
were like, dude, like, you gotta start doing more of
these like celebrity programs, especially with having a golf clothing
line coming out, which I'm going to be having a
golf clothing line coming out. I cannot say the name of.
I cannot say anymore about it yet. We're gonna have
a major and major launch. But uh, you know, he's
(01:22):
absolutely right, like I need to start doing more of
these celebrity programs and rocking my own ship. Um, but
you do look, uh, we have a really really cool
show today, And I'm actually really excited because I, you know,
one of these two gentlemen, Um, I got to know
pretty well UM, and I was basically you and I
(01:46):
were going head to head with him amongst amongst everyone
else on Dancing with the Stars. Um, you know, and
uh we were teenagers. Yeah, and I mean, like honest
to god, UM had a great eight experience on that show.
And uh, you know what, really really quick side note
which is really funny. So this residency that's coming up
(02:07):
in August, that's myself, Nick Carter, Joey for Tone, and
Juanna Morris from Boys to Men. Uh, we all have
one thing in common besides that we're in like boy
bandy type groups, is that all four of us we're
on Dancing with the Stars. And and it pissed me
off to no end. We all talked about it during
the photo shoot and I said, Joey, what what place
(02:30):
did you come in? And he said second. I said, okay, Nick,
what place did you come And he said second. I'm like, okay, one,
what about you? He's like a second. I'm like damn it.
But but you forgot to ask them what season they
did this in? So you know, the true. As we
go on through the season, do you have more pressure? Yeah,
but I was just like, man that it kind of
(02:52):
it just kind of hurt my heart a little. What
place did what placed nine? Well, if you flip the
nine backside, no no no no no no no no,
we were six, you're right because they had final five,
right or final four? We're rather six four, final four,
final four. So I was the one that was taken
(03:13):
this right before that, before that. Yes, okay, that's who's
counting better. That's a little better. I was giving myself
by the first number. You also got jipped, So I'm
so sorry. Yes, that was not deserved. And you guys
will you guys will always be number one in my heart.
You know what, when we when we bring bring the
(03:35):
fellas in, I want to ask one of these guys
if they if they feel that we got chipped, well
they'll tell you the truth. You know that much that
these boys bs. Well, then without further ado, Ladies and gentlemen,
let's bring on our guests plural. That wasn't a lisp.
(03:55):
That's just how it sounds. Um. Two brothers that are
quite quite talented young men. Ladies and gentlemen, Welcome to
the show. Val and Max Murkowski, heday, here's the boys
where you're just sitting there. Butcher in the last names?
Is that it hurt? We actually he got your last
(04:17):
name right. No, I got your last name right, thanks
to me, but somebody on our team. I completely up
and you know, but it's look, I'm like reading it
and it just yeah, anyh No, listen, guys, welcome to
the show. Thank you. I was going to tell you
a story, so we just do it right, no introduction,
(04:40):
We go ahead, Val, what's your story about? I'm now,
I'm now, I'm curious. I'm in Vegas for the for
the Dance Awards, and this little cute girl runs up
to me, grabs me by the hand and goes, hey,
I'm aging McQueen's daughter. Yeah. Yes, she told me, and
I wanted to. I was. I was going to bring
it up, but you beat me to it. I was
gonna say thank you. Uh, you and your wife were
(05:02):
both very very sweet, very sweet get out of the class.
Yeah you're like you're like, you know what, No, yeah,
tough love ballrooms not for you, because obviously it wasn't
for your dad. Just five minutes. It was so cute man.
(05:24):
I it was so sweet to to see your family
like that, not on the rest of the COVID season,
and also meet your wife, you know, per well, thank
you to you and yours. Uh, you and your wife
were both amazing as well. And you know, I told
my daughter, I said, I really wish you would have
(05:46):
met you know, Val sooner and not the last class
of the third day where she was literally about to
like pass out from exhaustion, because it was it was
pretty it was pretty gnarly, you know, especially you for
the minis to not have any lunch breaks. It's like
seven or eight classes in a row. It's a lot.
But hats off to all the all the kids, especially mine.
(06:09):
I mean, it was a it was a trooper and
she did fantastic. So hey, a J you want to
introduce Renee? Yes you obviously you guys know that that
chick right there. Uh, but I'd like to introduce you
both to a long time friend of mine, Mr Renee Alisondo,
(06:30):
also a dancer and co host of Pretty Up. Was
a dancer, but you do you still dance? Nobody nobody
ever was a dancer. Yeah, we always are. Well, my
back kind of disagrees. My back says you were a dancer.
(06:52):
How are you boys? Um? Perfectly, personally, I'm feeling exactly
my age. It's twenty two exhausted. Um, no, we we
were in rehearsal day. I don't even know what day
it is. It does feel, um incredibly, Um, it feels
incredible to be to have the opportunity, you know, like
(07:14):
a year older, maybe a little bit wiser, definitely a
little grayer. And the perspective is that we set out
and you take something away, you know exactly, you don't
know what you got until it's gone. And and this
was gone for a little bit and now we're here
and I try not to complain, but it still comes
out right right right, you can't stop that. Um. What
(07:36):
makes this tour stripped down? I'm really excited to see.
I'm very proud of you boys. What makes this tour
different from your other other shows? I mean, there there's
a lot Why do you have more space on your broth?
I'm just well, there's a little preview you guys. Honestly,
the name came around when we were just kind of
(07:58):
discussing the idea in the first place. There are a
lot of restrictions with going out on tour, and we
you know, we the idea was, there was a desire
to go out on tour. There was a desire to
be on a stage, travel the country, meet our fans,
reconnect with the people that I feel created this little
pseudo career you know of performing and being on TV
(08:21):
and on stage. I you know, I wanted to reconnect
with that. And plus I love live stage and I
love life stage with my brother because you know, he's
rarely prepared and a lot of authenticity is present. Um.
But yeah, and so that was the desire. How do
we do it? You know? And then we start asking
(08:41):
questions and then logistics come into play, and ultimately we're like, listen,
you know, this is literally stripped down. I mean, this
is like stripped down of staging of this, you know.
But it's what it lacks in terms of production, it
makes up for the storytelling. Right. So it's not just
a random show that there's a narrative for an hour
and a half. It's it's theater. It's what is the narrative?
(09:04):
The narrative, I would say the theme would be time
and how precious it is and and the good times,
the hard times, and and how time is also the
one thing that's constantly fleeting you can't get back, and
and because of that, that's really what creates this beautiful
struggle with life. Is that because time is fleeting, because
(09:28):
it's gonna end, that's what makes it so beautiful. Dispassion
Nice agreed, And you know, look, I can honestly relate
because you know, obviously we were in the middle of
a world tour and everything got shut down. But thankfully
I was able to, you know, with all the COVID
guidelines do the show with you guys, UM, in which
(09:51):
I got to meet one of my now closest friends,
Cheryl Um, which which brings me to kind of an
interesting question, Um, because it's been on my mind ever
since the show wrapped, and I'm just curious about what
your opinion is. Uh, do you think in your opinion
(10:14):
that myself and Cheryl got the shaft that we should
have made it to final four. I don't even need
to tell you to tell the truth, because you will anyway,
So I'll tell the truth. Are definitely Um underachieved? Now,
whether underachieved was something that you under achieved in the
quality of dance, or whether it was an unfair elimination
(10:36):
too early. Either way, it was not what I expected
going into the season. But I can't you know, it's
heartbreaking for you. But I think Cheryl over time has
learned that they're there are heartbreaks on the show constantly.
Did I feel like it was a deserving elimination. No,
that's the answer that you know we should Max, because
(11:00):
Max Um actually did these YouTube videos right, you know,
and I saw a lot of them, and he was, Dude,
you were giving lots of lots of props our way.
I really, I, I honestly, genuinely appreciate it because I'm
my own worst critic, I'm my own worst enemy, as
all of us are so stepping into something that I mean,
I'm a hip hop dancer. I've been dancing my whole
(11:20):
life since I was four years old, never attempted anything
like ballroom and I do have the utmost respect for
it more now than ever putting myself in that in
that world. Um and you guys, all three of you,
I mean, are like the staple of ballrooms. So you
(11:40):
know what, what did you think? I would like to
intervene real quick and just say one more thing. I
think that Um, it was a unique season, and because
of that, it took away something that I think is
really something that you were the best at on our
show is your experience in front of a live audience,
packed audience, that relationship. I mean, it just brings it
(12:05):
brings you alive. I think your presence on the show,
your demeanor, your how relaxed you got after a few weeks.
You would have felt so much more confidence when you
would have heard the roar and been able to have
that third partner. You didn't have that, and I think
we all I think that's honestly, that's another element that
at least I missed, because I totally I was. I
(12:25):
made a j sing to me during the show because
I could it was like crickets. I could hear the
freaking judges breathed down my neck. It would have definitely
it would have definitely led the audience to lead the
show as well. You know, we let them be the
not let them we we always include the audience as
a huge component. You take it away, it's just the
script of judges opinion. That's my opinion. Absolutely I agree
(12:48):
down this line. But in my opinion, I respected your
effort and and it wasn't about pointed toes or technique
quality and not on this show now when you have
four days to learn years of technique and repetition and
and try to settle it into your body. Um, I
do not appreciate visually underwhelming efforts. You know, and you that,
(13:13):
and you clearly put out a hundred ten and and
and for that, I wanted to see you every week
in the contrast with some of other competitors who probably
were underwhelming, you know, because and and and with within
a better like quality dance or whatever it is. And
it's actually funny. What's actually funny is the other day
on fourth of July, I was telling some of mine
(13:37):
and Renee's friends about the experience on the show, and
I was like, yeah, da da dah, and oh my god,
if I had to hear the word frame one more
time from Cheryl and I was trying to do a
frame and my wife goes, so that that doesn't look right, babe,
that doesn't look good. I'm like you, now you too, Jesus,
Come on, um, it's hard. It's hard just going through
(14:00):
this process. Like my head's off to everyone, but not everyone,
but you know, everyone in any capacity in terms of
the participant. It is a grueling undertaking and to be
in a room with Max not but God forbid, you
have a giant following, right, and you just suck a
(14:22):
dance on everything and they just drag you across this
form of a show for two and a half months
and you just want to like this, how do I
get out of here? You know? Those I feel even
worse for it, Like you probably should have known what
you're signing up for. It looks easy though, Like I mean,
every celebrity that works into like, oh my god, we
thought it was way easier than it actually is. And
(14:42):
I'm like, yeah, no, I have a question. I have
a question for you guys. Um I also come from
the creative world, and you know, to me, it's it's
a miracle that anything ever gets done because you know,
we're all there's a lot of egos that come into play.
That's just the way things are, right And and um,
(15:05):
I was fortunate enough to work with Janet Jackson for
many years, but for her, it just came down to
what she wanted, right. So my my question to you
guys is and watching a j with the Backstreet Boys
survived for twenty years somehow, what is your guys, what
what your creative process? What happens when you guys are
(15:26):
at a creative impasse? How do you guys handle that?
I mean, we we are completely you know, um, we
have very different week we as tight as we are,
and share will tell you we you know, had to
be separated from living to them, you're sharing a bad
bunk beds until because Peter was pregnant. She got pregnant.
(15:48):
That's how we moved out. Finally, I was that we
got six years apart though, and I think we do
have obviously differences. We take different approaches. I have a
different history with the show. I have a different understanding
of the show. Um, I thought that your question was
kind of going somewhere else, but actually it was I
(16:09):
was thinking, yeah, yeah, sorry, I was thinking, like on
your road show, right, the one you guys have put together. Uh,
That's what I was thinking about. How like everyone has
creative impasses because you're we're individuals, right, and so how
do you guys handle if you guys feel strongly about
the direction it needs to be? How do you guys
(16:30):
handle that? I mean, I get I can still say
so with this particular project we walked into the room.
And then day one, um, we've you know before the
first choreographer would come, you know, and she would know
all the people that we're working with, and and we're lucky,
We're lucky. We reached out to friends of ours and
we just said, hey, we're doing this. If you you
could say no, please feel free and everybody was gracious
(16:52):
to say. But anyway, before the first day, the first day,
before the firstchoreographer came, we had blocked off a couple
hours just to put together a couple of eights of
choreography whatever. And we walked in and the first thing
that happened is we both were strong about like the
beginning of this church and it wasn't even a choreography yet,
and we immediately had a conversation about, look, let's just
(17:15):
let's just let somebody drive the strain, right, Like, if
we cannot be successful regardless of who's driving, if there's
two steering wheels right and the set of sets of
pedals right, somebody's got to be on the seat right.
I'm gonna tell you right now, I have absolutely zero
pride and ego and ambition about who's driving. And I'm
(17:36):
as having an incredible time watching him drive the creative
in most of the instances because I know that well,
I mean, I'm just saying like, because I know that
I shared the same values in terms of what we're
trying to put out. We've done this couple of times before,
um in a bigger scale but also in the big
(17:57):
scale of creative and and it's proven itself. But again,
we respect each other. I'm gonna say it, and and
and and I don't easy easy easy moments where I
can step in and we have that benter we all
we also know each other well after a lot of
time working together, so you know, I would never put
(18:19):
him in a position where he looks bad or right,
there's trust, ever fought? Have you ever just gotten a disagreement? Yes,
just like even thirty Today's morning. I think that's another thing.
It's like we just need to check ourselves and realize that.
That's why I yeah, that's why I asked, because like
(18:41):
with with the Backstreet Boys, there's five of them, and
so they go to the democratic process, right, It's like
that's what we try to do. But then sometimes it
you know, because sometimes like there was a six year
period where we're down to four members. One of our
members left to you know, start a family, do odd way,
follow some of his other dreams. And during that time
(19:04):
we had to have someone else steer the ship. Because
if you have two guys that now that say it's red,
and two guys say it's blue, we're in. Now we're stuck.
So you you know, management comes in, the publicist comes in.
Hell sometimes even our freaking lawyers came in to help
move things along. You know, now again twenty eight years later,
(19:27):
there is like you said, Val, we we we know
each other so well now that we know. Okay, I'm
not even gonna bring this up because I know it's
gonna get shut down, so why haven't waste the time?
But I know what each guy's thinking. I know what
each guy's probably gonna say, So I know, okay, this
is how we get shipped done. You know you're the
(19:49):
O G. So does whatever you say go? No? But
I used to be a mute when it came to
making decisions because I just didn't want to rock the boat.
I never wanted to, you know, stir up hot. Have
any of the guys mad at me? Now if I
don't like it, I'll tell you I don't. I don't
like it. I'll just be like, Nope, that's a dumb idea.
You're not dumb, but the idea is dumb. Let's find
(20:11):
something else because that's not gonna work, or that's gonna
turnish the brand or whatever the case is. Um, you
know it is. It's gonna say that. I just wanted
to point out it is very wise. I love what
you said. Um to standing wheels isn't gonna cut it right.
Understanding that is really important. I agree with you. If
(20:34):
two people, Yeah, at the end of the day, for me,
it's all about the work. Like me, with all due respect,
you know, Like if you're my brother and you're you're
not you're not doing you know, you're compromising the work,
I'm gonna love you, but I'm not gonna work with you.
If you're my friend, we put we put friends on.
It's all about creating our own village. Cheryl knows the vibes.
(20:57):
We all work with friends and family something for better
and for worse. But when the product suffers, I will
you know, I'm ruthless when it comes to that because
at the end of the day, my responsibility or response,
everybody's collective responsibility shouldn't be about who wants to drive,
and rather how we get to where we need to get,
so that exactly our audience has the you know, our
(21:20):
partners have what you know, there's you guys all have
the same goal at the end of the day as
it comes from the ballroom part and Renee well and
and also like aj, you would understand too now that
you spend all the time with Cheryl and what what look,
what happened? You met somebody and three months later you
guys are best friends. And you know, I'm just saying that,
you know, we've grown up. We grew up with that
(21:42):
we could be whoever we are as people. But what
we do know is how to work with a partner
right and when the partnership becomes multiplied. Um, I just
want to also say that in our particular case, if
the lawyers would have to get involved, then moms would
get involved, and moms, it's not it's around with any
of the situation that's gonna go down, everybody's gonna get
slapped and then we're gonna have dinner together. And yeah, exactly,
(22:04):
and we would probably not be you know, we I
would personally exit that you know, because we can do
that a piece of mind, and not not that a
working environment is always going to be peaceful. You know,
there's turbulence and and for better. But if I don't
have camaraderie on in the world, I'm not gonna I'm
(22:27):
not gonna do well. And that's just really quickly, Rene sorry,
and that that was another reason for doing this project.
You know. We we ended up with a situation where
we just had ourselves and we looked around and we said, look,
well let's just do it ourselves, right, And so here
we are doing it ourselves. We don't have the production
company support. We are your own boss. We don't have
(22:50):
marketing team support. We brought in our friends, like Val said,
and so we're putting it together. What are we pego wise?
You know? And and I think this is a culmination
of what what is a bit? I don't know, twenty
years plus years of doing stuff together, do you know
the evolution? The reason I guess I end up bringing
(23:13):
it up is that, you know, I do have decades
in in show business, from directing, the songwriting too, dancing,
choreography and different things. But what I noticed, like when
I worked with Janet for many years the same thing, camaraderie.
We wanted the camaraderie, We wanted everyone to feel like family, right,
(23:33):
But once in a while I would notice the fame
would start to get to certain people. They started their
heads started getting too big, and all of a sudden,
they were no longer in the spirit of the show,
the team. It's it was all about them. So that's
why I asked that question. I think that that you
guys are well aware that like the bigger you get,
(23:56):
the harder you have to work at keeping your feet
on the ground. Right. Yeah, it's also probably a harder
process of selecting who you want to work with. You
have to earn the right to be selective, and you
have to put out the type of work that earns
you that right. And once you earn that right, then
you have to really take your time and and I
think it's it's something that we've always um prioritized because
(24:20):
if you do it right, it's a lot easier to
go through this process. Renewed that you're saying absolutely so,
you know, just your your own boss phrase, you know, like,
I'm not a boss, I'm you know, I'm a collaborator.
I'm one of the teams. You know, I'm one of
the members on the team, and my role is maybe
potentially to to make the final decision. Okay, but you know,
(24:43):
I look at it as a huge privilege to be
able to have two dancers with us alongside. Privileged to
have my brother. Sometimes they take it for granted, but
other people that are are helping us create the show,
you know, I can never take for grant. We're collaborated.
I'm it's a privilege is that you're willing to come
here and share your talent and time and effort. I
(25:16):
just want to shift gears for a second, because you know, uh,
this whole trio came to be UM at the beginning
of last season of Nancy with the Stars UM, and
you know, kind of the epicenter of what this show,
you know, is it's built around, is we all three
(25:41):
of us are sober. All three of us have gone
off the deep end multiple times and made it back
up on shore. UM. And you know, so we're always
just talking about living life on life's terms, talking about
what it's what it's been like for everybody during COVID
(26:01):
and mental health issues, which is a big, big thing
now finally being more publicly spoken about, and I look,
I I know the stresses I've dealt with, you know,
being being with four other guys from four different walks
of life, and we are family, we are brothers. We
know this is our first marriage. All five of us
are married with kids, but this will forever be our
(26:23):
first marriage period. And there's been highs and lows that
we've all dealt with together, as I'm sure all of
the pros on Dancing with the Stars have have experienced
highs and lows with each other. Because you are family,
you are family. So I just want to say to Cheryl,
how did it make you feel? Or ask you not
(26:44):
to say, do you ask you? How did it make
you feel after the recent interview that you did, that
you got such great support from these two boys. How
did that make you feel? I mean, honestly, it's it's
it means the world to me. But also I care
more are about like people like Max and VL right
what they think, more than the general public in a way,
(27:06):
because like we do have history, right, so it does
in a way like I do look to them and
you know, my other co workers and friends for validation.
So it is comforting to know that these two have
been very supportive for sure. So Fellas, what do you
think has been the biggest change that you've seen in Cheryl?
(27:27):
Because like you know when well, no, look like obviously
when I met her, because I have been asked her
when we got into like probably like week one or
week two, I was like, did we have a party together?
Because I don't remember something I don't remember. I don't
remember And it's sad that we may have and we
both don't remember it. But you know, that's just that, Yeah,
(27:50):
that's just the way that it goes when you're out
and you're doing all the all that bad ship. But
I mean, how how how how much have you seen
her change? It's those days you know, Max, not Max,
it's Max valance, you know, a lot, a lot with
(28:11):
a lot, And yeah, this is a question about Cheryl.
I just also would like to say that we've all changed.
I mean that's the right progression, right evolved. Yeah, and
you wouldn't have you know, Cheryl wouldn't have been glowing
as bright as she glows now. Her clothes got brighter,
if anything. Literally know, you you wouldn't have the type
of perspective and gratitude that you have and shrink if
(28:33):
you didn't have those times. And as much as we
want to obviously correct the past, you don't want to
necessarily change all of them, you know, because that's that's
what it means. You know, a j We're gonna need
a separate show and a lot more times and lawyers, lawyers,
that's him. But no, but I'm saying like I will
(28:56):
gladly talk about what what would, in my opinion be
probably the most interesting years. And again this is just
in grand scheme of things. The most interesting years of
Dancing with the Stars were from two thousand five till
you know, some period of time when it started a
social media where it started to go to changes that
just took away from what it wasn't and what it's
(29:18):
now something else, you know. But you know, we we
grew up here. I have to say that in that
way because I know Cheryl way before Dancing with the Stars.
I know Sheryl since the youth days and the Junior
two days, not maybe the Junior two but the youth
days for sure. We're talking about thirteen fifteen years old
categories where I am as a coach traveling with my
(29:41):
students who are also thirteen fifteen, you know, and so, um,
I've I've seen the transformation. I have to say this
way to answer your question about Cheryl and what I
think about the changes is that that thing that you
guys are discussing. Um, I'm personally have to admit I'm
(30:02):
unfamiliar with that. You know, so I be more educated.
But what I am familiar with is the transformation that
Cheryl had made through all these decades. I mean, I
can't focus on sobriety alone, and and and and say things.
I can't focus on partying alone. I can also focus
on the fact that she has become one of the
(30:24):
biggest names and television. I can also focus on the
fact that she's always shown up. I can focus on
the fact she's probably the most stable staple off Dancing
with the Stars dance professionals. Um, I mean I did
not provide the show with sense of security whatsoever. You know,
(30:45):
don't worry. I'll I'll definitely venmo you after the interview
is over. That's my honest opinion. And on the personal level,
you no on on early in the day. You know,
Share always helped me personally through a lot, and I
think that you know, I like I said for me
(31:05):
that stuff that we all have things we deal with,
you know. Um, like I said, we all have things
we deal with. I don't know how else to dwell
into it, but I just Cheryl was always like I mean,
also the other thing is like ageless, Like I felt
like you were much older when you were only twenty two,
(31:26):
right you joined Dancing with the Stars, you know. Also
like what you said at the peak and when it
was you were a list if you were on Dancing
with the Star at that time, you know. And so
that's a lot of pressure and a lot of growth.
And I just remember that's a lot of pressure on
the one year old is dead. The way Cheryl was
(31:48):
like again not to the old digression father, there was
no blueprint for us. We just went in blind and
we fought our way to kind of some sort of
you know, also having a voice, you know, such a
big you know, and and it was a lot and
facilitate changes and facilitate you know, doors to be open
(32:11):
and steps, especially coming from the competitive ballroom world, because
I mean I was dancing with jose DeCamps right before
I did Dancing with the Stars, and just that camaraderie
just between me and my partner, and Alan Tornsburg, my
dance coach. I there was no room for my opinion
or a voice, right, So I literally was looking at
old VHS tapes that I converted from my YouTube channel,
(32:33):
and I had an English accent. Do you remember that? Guys?
Remember my little tiny mouse voice that sounded kind of
like I was from England. I kind of wasn't sure where.
I don't think she knew where she was from. Apparently
my identity I had none, right, And then Umi, you
were half Russian somehow, like totally I know. I'm still
(32:55):
trying to figure that out. I'm actual Ashkenazi Jew. Did
you know that he definitely got Russian over here? My
first name is actually Russian Alexander, which translates to Sasha.
So welcome to the show, by the way. To bring
(33:15):
it back and circle it back to where we should
be talking about, is this tour coming up? But the
tripped down is and and Shell knows the gentleman that
we're talking about. But our dad is actually our you know,
formal manager. So so we're doing that that way, and uh,
and we're doing it with pleasure and pride. He's probably
(33:36):
the most organized person we know anyway. Um, but but
that's the other thing again, ag, it's not you know,
we we were some some some show asked us about
Sherylae and it's probably what you're referring to a couple
of or a week ago. Like we we have a
relationship beyond how the world met us, which is on television.
(33:56):
You know, like she knows our father, you know, so
obviously the family Like, that's not like going to be
like so I so you know, look so val as
you now know my well, both of my daughters are
(34:17):
both in dance. My oldest is in competitive dance. Um,
you know all of us are married here, you know,
so you know children down down the road. If if
our kids want to get into competitive dance or be
on this level that we all are, how do you, like,
would you I'm I'm assuming all of us would obviously
(34:41):
support that, but would you encourage it or would you
be like, you know what, it's a lot of work,
it's a little stressful, would be dance Dad's yeah? Or
or would you be like maybe I I maybe you know,
I freaking went through all this. I don't know if
it's right for you. You know, I would definitely encourage
it for sure. Yeah, I think. I mean, especially what
(35:03):
we mentioned about your daughter in that weekend, they three
forty classes later. Competition is that like they go through
a lot, you know. And I'm not I'm very grateful
to my competitive dance career that that equipped me with
life long tools that even as an entrepreneur or not
not just as a creative, you know. So I think
(35:24):
dance in general, especially for kids, will teach the magility, discipline,
how to, how to work together with others, how to
you know, be in public. They're not going to have
this stigma of how to. They're gonna know how to
conduct themselves properly with confidence but humility, you know. And
hopefully I think the most important thing is the teachers
that are standing in front of those kids, you know.
(35:44):
And if you could, if you're lucky enough to find
a teacher that's gonna care and be accountable for the
voice and the and then the things that are coming
into you know, that's my thought. But I teach my kid,
I would help my kid, but I would have someone
else probably teaching coach my kid. But I gotta say, like,
(36:06):
in light of what he just said, you have to
find a teacher as a parent and a j you
would say it. And you know, Renee, I'm not sure
if you have kids. But that's the hardest part is
that's the hardest part when you bring your kid and
drop him off in in in in nursery or pre
kid or gymnastics, and and then endorsed closed and you
have no idea and my heart is just like on
(36:27):
the floor next next to the door until I pick
him up. I'm like, the first question is always how
was it you have fun? Was it okay that you're okay? Yeah? Yeah,
I had a great time. You want to come back?
That's my first question. You want to come back? Like, yeah, dance.
He did not want to come back to but I
saw through the window was happening. It's just like the
wait a minute, not my thing. So yeah, bringing him
(36:49):
every week consistently and and and just drop him off
and leave. And I have a four and a half
year old now he recently had a recital and I
lost my ship. I'm gonna tell you right now. In there,
we've been there beause zero expectations because every time I
drop him more up, I would beat and I would
go have coffee. I'm like, I don't want to sit
through this nervousness of him not doing anything and me
(37:11):
feeling some kind of way. So I'm with Valve. Uh.
I have to admit that our process is the same
as what I've gone through, is how do we limit
his free time? How do we give him as much
opportunity as possible? Uh? And again I have to agree
with about the fact that you you were saying, oh
my god, how hard this weekend is. Classes like that,
(37:34):
but amazing it is for you more long run, and
so I would welcome that. Oh yeah, I mean I'm
sitting there as a proud father watching watching EVA and
just you know, knowing like I wish I had that
when I was a kid, that you know, that type
of you know, structure in the sense of competitive dance.
(37:54):
In this that year, I just love to dance, and
I took every style of dance. Hip hop and j
as were the two that really stuck with me. We yes,
thank you very much, thank you very much. So before
we let you guys go, I just want to go
back to the show. Um, you know, look, this is
what what you guys are doing is a It's fantastic
(38:16):
be Thank god live shows are coming back. People are
dying to see anything. Uh, you know, and there is
such a huge core fan base between the two of you. Um,
I know you've kind of touched on it, but I
just want you to have you both to reiterate one
one final time. What can people expect from this show?
(38:37):
What are they going to take home from this show
that maybe they haven't seen before? And where can they
get tickets? M Um, I'm gonna I'm gonna start. I
gonna start with the with the maxim Valts or dot
com for tickets. Now. Now we only have nineteen cities,
(38:59):
so it's very limited engagement. We're kind of pushing it
for a month of August. I'm looking forward, um up north,
so call your mom's thing, like everybody coming through um
the show. Val will put it eloquently, or I would
(39:22):
say that, you know, it's it's the project that we
kindled my love. We we engaged me with dance in
the way that I can now participate in conversations about
how much I love dance. You always gonna miss you,
miss Jenna and Peter like, is it weird that I mean,
I'm sure it's gonna be nice. Just the boys, right
and your dad being your tour manager. But how about
(39:43):
your girls. Well no, we're definitely gonna miss him, but
that but we just couldn't afford you can't afford them
for you, guys, take a break. We're gonna do this.
The show is first of all, it's it's a family show. Uh.
There's a lot of comedy. There's a lot a theater,
you know, to us, the inspiration of like John laguzamo
(40:04):
a live on stage, you know, the one man shows,
even bol Berman like like you know, the the artists
that can go on stage and have a compelling story,
so compelling enough to tell that you know, it's captivating
to watch and then you walk away really inspired, connected, motivated,
you know. So imagine that with Dan's with spoken word
(40:28):
and uh and a lot and a lot of heart. Right,
So this comedy and heart that that I feel like
is what and specifically this personality right here right right
and lots of stripping or is that just a title?
I am taking up pencil? Thank you? Okay? I wanted to.
I wanted to. I wanted to commend you guys because
(40:50):
two things that stuck with me. One is the teacher.
It is so important who's teaching your kids, right, because
it is a competitive world, especially dance, you know, where
you're being judged and this and that. I think it's
so important to always infuse lessons of life, and it
sounds like your show is doing that by you saying
(41:11):
this is about time, how fleeting time is essentially be
in the moment, right and to me, being able to
mix a beautiful art form like dance but with lessons right,
it's almost like putting putting the medicine in the hot dog.
You know. We kept talking about the show again, like
(41:35):
just not to read read a hundreds of time, but
the fact that our stories are so real and we
we we put ourselves on stage in the reality. We
also went through, you know, the pandemic for example, and
we also are just us. I'm also a father and
also a husband. You know, he's also a husband and
you know a son. You know. So what you guys
(41:56):
are very open with your lives. I mean, value wrote
a book. I mean it's your What you see is
what you get. You know, we put it on stage
and there will be people in the audience that will relate,
that will connect and and we'll lift through this right. Well,
were because we're proud we're proud of the you know
I think. Yeah, anyway, I do expect my v I
(42:17):
P tickets sent to me so I can come to
the show. All of us want to come to you
drive home to the Bay Area. So what date are
you there? We're in Walnut Creek on of and that's
something that's date and after that will go well, maybe
I'll see if the white people used to have a
little getaway weekend away from the kids for for I
(42:40):
see creek. You don't understand how grateful I'm going to
be too. Guys, boys, we need to take a road trip,
but I don't but to put that type of pressure
on you. So there's I can't put that pressure. There
are tons of pressure. Maxwell put that kind of pressure
on me though, I know that, and so will I. Yes,
thank you guys so much. Coming on go check out
(43:00):
the Stripped Down Tour and you can get tickets and
all your information at Max and Vale tour dot com.
Thank you fellas, to see you soon than pleasure. Have
a good one, guys. All right, you guys, we're gonna
take a quick little break and when we come back,
we're gonna answer some of your questions before we wrap
(43:20):
it up. Stay tuned. All right, you guys, we are
back from break uh and it's time for the Listen
the question section of the show. I don't know why
(43:41):
I decided to talk like this, but I'm doing it anyways.
Um So listen you guys, always, always, always, all of
our amazing listeners and fans of the show. You guys
send us questions every week and we much much much
much appreciate it as well as hit that subscribe button.
Give us five stars, keep this bad Boy going. So
(44:02):
our first question comes ask you the first question because
it's for you. It's from Christina. Christina. Hi, Christina, Okay,
so a j Are you done getting tattoos? If not,
what will the next one be? And where Here's a
short and sweet answer. No, I am not done getting
tattoos and the next one, um is either going to be.
(44:25):
I'm going to start, uh start working below the belt. Um.
I have yet to do my legs, but I do
want to start on my shins and my als. Um.
I already know what I want to get on my
right leg. I want to get a scene from one
of my favorite films of all time, Nightmare Before Christmas
(44:49):
with Jack and Sally and zero and then on my
left leg. All you yeah, no, for all, for all
you eighties babies, um that remember the Muppet Show. Uh,
there was a band on The Muppet Show called Electric
Mayhem Dr Teeth Animal Janice. Uh, so I want to
(45:12):
get Electric Mayhem tattooed on my left leg. So the
answer would be, you're You're never gonna be finished. No, no,
no no, there's going to come a point where I
will be finished. Um it sucks, well no, no, but
cheeks definitely no. But you know what Stevo has. Stevo
has probably one of the best tattoos ever. He has
(45:33):
your name tattooed on his ass cheek, which is phenomenal.
He has your name tattooed on his ass cheeks, not
as the words your name, it's so good and the
other name. It's just right on it. I think it's
his right cheek. It says your name. I think it's genius.
Um no, but I think at some point. Uh. You
(45:55):
know what sucks is is that one of my tattoos
I have on my back was done by a very
very famous tattoo artist in uh Amsterdam who goes by
the name of Hanky Panky Hank and he is. He's
a legend in the tattoo world, and he has since
retired from what I've heard. And I thought I was
(46:16):
born in the Year of the Dragon. Uh, clearly I
am not. Uh. That's that's what alcohol and tattoos will
do it for you. I think I'm born in the
Year of the Rabbit. Way off. Um. But I've tried
to get it covered up. And any tattoo artist worth
their salt who knows who did it will never cover
(46:36):
it up. It's like sacrilegious in the tattoo community. Oh yeah,
oh yeah. Plus most tattoo artists won't. They won't. I could,
but you know what no, I mean now that I
know it's it's so like it's so taboo, like I'm
not gonna touch it. So all right, we have Our
next question is from Liz uh. Liz asks what is
(46:59):
the one thing all of you have learned about yourself
being sober? You go first, what's the one thing or
just name one thing you've learned. The shortest, simplest answer
would be that I learned that I'm not less than
and to me, that has given me the personal freedom
(47:21):
I always searched for through drugs. Drugs and alcohol made
me sort of numb to this feeling of being less than,
and so doing the work, I was able to get
rid of all that crap, and I no longer feel
less than. It doesn't mean I feel better than it
just feel I just feel a part of an equal
(47:43):
part of the universe and anyone else. So I thought
you were going to say that you finally figured out
that you're Mexican. Oh, my god, way to ruin it.
It turns out it turns out that's beautiful. Oh that
would be the short answer would be I discovered through
(48:04):
the process of being sober that I'm not less than.
And that's the one thing that I didn't think I
would ever get to. I think for me, the one thing,
or one of many things I've learned in my sobriety
is um is that it's okay to fail at things. Um.
(48:25):
You know, I used to beat myself up all the time.
Failure was never an option for me, and if I
did fail at something, I would literally wallow in my
own ship and beat myself up and you know, drink
and whatever over it and just mask it like it's
a you know, a liquid band aid with booze. But
today I know, you know what, if I fail at something,
(48:49):
it just means I have to work a little harder,
you know, the you know next time it's and it
looks it's okay to not be perfect. It's a failure
as success, you know, like if you haven't failed, how
can you succeed exactly exactly? And you share the well
I've learned, I guess more about my connection with God
(49:10):
and my higher power. Um. I think that I never
even really I always thought it was woo woo, and
I never I guess I just was too drunk most
of the time to even think about that, right, like,
because I believe that when you're doing something that may
not be um pure to who you are, it's really hard.
(49:33):
I think that that that vision of spirituality very rarely
comes in. So I think being sober has really, I guess,
connected me to my faith more and spirituality. So I
love that. I love that. That's my story to Cheryl.
I came into the program just not not an atheist.
(49:56):
I always believe there was something, but I was more
trying to avoid that something. I thought that something was
judging me, looking down at me, you know, like with
a lot of disappointment. So I was like, no, I
got to avoid this whole higher power thing. But it
turns out to be the thing that has helped me
get to a place where I believe I'm no longer
(50:19):
I no longer believe I'm less than because we obviously
can't do this on on our own. And you know,
at the end of the day, you know, let's say,
God forbid, you're in a place where you can't phone
a friend or you can't call someone. All you gotta
do is close your eyes and talk to your higher
power and there you go, and you can have that
(50:40):
exact same conversation and get that same comfort to hopefully
help you not pick up. And I want to take
a second, just a second, you guys, to just thank
our listeners. Um. They they've been reaching out a lot
lately about how the show is having a positive impact
on their lives, whether it's UH eating disorders, whether it's
(51:04):
anxiety disorders, whether it's addiction alcohol, living with an addict.
There's been like an influx of people saying thank you
and wanting me to pass along to you guys the
thank you. Just yesterday someone someone wrote me and said
that you know your story. Cheryl really touched her because
(51:26):
she's been sober for a few years but never did
any of the work in the program, but also has
never received or or been able to feel that freedom
that we talk about. And she said, you making the
decision publicly too step into the program before you drink
(51:50):
made her want to get into the program. Yeah, and
there's been there's been a lot of that. And so
I want to thank the listener, and I want to
thank you guys. I want to thank you guys for
being you too, buddy, thank you babe, because the truth
is you guys. Not everybody feels comfortable opening up, but
(52:11):
you know, we made a decision to tell our truth
and if it helps people, awesome. But this is what
I've learned to do, is just to be authentic in
order to keep feeling this awesome feeling of of like freedom,
not feeling like I'm missing out on anything. So I
want to thank you, Yes, yes, Cheryl, Yes, Thank you
(52:35):
guys as always for your questions, and thanks again to
Val and Max for joining us today. And you guys
stay safe out there, enjoy yourselves, be kind to one another,
and we will see you and talk to you next week. Bye.
Guys later Bye. Follow Pretty Messed Up on her radio,
(52:57):
or subscribe wherever you listen to podcasts to you
I'm pretty bad. Hey, everybody, welcome to another episode a
(00:20):
pretty messed up on I Heart Radio. I am your host,
A J. McClean with my beautiful and one shoulder showing gauge,
co host share Beard and Mr Golf himself rocking a
very nice shirt. I must say what you guys will
(00:40):
be hearing a lot about very soon. Mr Ranee Lassando,
how about how about we hear about it now? I mean, look,
I'll just say this much. Um. You know, so I
actually played golf this morning and yesterday and yesterday was it.
Yesterday was the day before yesterday, day before yesterday. But
(01:00):
when I was playing this morning with my buddies, they
were like, dude, like, you gotta start doing more of
these like celebrity programs, especially with having a golf clothing
line coming out, which I'm going to be having a
golf clothing line coming out. I cannot say the name of.
I cannot say anymore about it yet. We're gonna have
a major and major launch. But uh, you know, he's
(01:22):
absolutely right, like I need to start doing more of
these celebrity programs and rocking my own ship. Um, but
you do look, uh, we have a really really cool
show today, And I'm actually really excited because I, you know,
one of these two gentlemen, Um, I got to know
pretty well UM, and I was basically you and I
(01:46):
were going head to head with him amongst amongst everyone
else on Dancing with the Stars. Um, you know, and
uh we were teenagers. Yeah, and I mean, like honest
to god, UM had a great eight experience on that show.
And uh, you know what, really really quick side note
which is really funny. So this residency that's coming up
(02:07):
in August, that's myself, Nick Carter, Joey for Tone, and
Juanna Morris from Boys to Men. Uh, we all have
one thing in common besides that we're in like boy
bandy type groups, is that all four of us we're
on Dancing with the Stars. And and it pissed me
off to no end. We all talked about it during
the photo shoot and I said, Joey, what what place
(02:30):
did you come in? And he said second. I said, okay, Nick,
what place did you come And he said second. I'm like, okay, one,
what about you? He's like a second. I'm like damn it.
But but you forgot to ask them what season they
did this in? So you know, the true. As we
go on through the season, do you have more pressure? Yeah,
but I was just like, man that it kind of
(02:52):
it just kind of hurt my heart a little. What
place did what placed nine? Well, if you flip the
nine backside, no no no no no no no no,
we were six, you're right because they had final five,
right or final four? We're rather six four, final four,
final four. So I was the one that was taken
(03:13):
this right before that, before that. Yes, okay, that's who's
counting better. That's a little better. I was giving myself
by the first number. You also got jipped, So I'm
so sorry. Yes, that was not deserved. And you guys
will you guys will always be number one in my heart.
You know what, when we when we bring bring the
(03:35):
fellas in, I want to ask one of these guys
if they if they feel that we got chipped, well
they'll tell you the truth. You know that much that
these boys bs. Well, then without further ado, Ladies and gentlemen,
let's bring on our guests plural. That wasn't a lisp.
(03:55):
That's just how it sounds. Um. Two brothers that are
quite quite talented young men. Ladies and gentlemen, Welcome to
the show. Val and Max Murkowski, heday, here's the boys
where you're just sitting there. Butcher in the last names?
Is that it hurt? We actually he got your last
(04:17):
name right. No, I got your last name right, thanks
to me, but somebody on our team. I completely up
and you know, but it's look, I'm like reading it
and it just yeah, anyh No, listen, guys, welcome to
the show. Thank you. I was going to tell you
a story, so we just do it right, no introduction,
(04:40):
We go ahead, Val, what's your story about? I'm now,
I'm now, I'm curious. I'm in Vegas for the for
the Dance Awards, and this little cute girl runs up
to me, grabs me by the hand and goes, hey,
I'm aging McQueen's daughter. Yeah. Yes, she told me, and
I wanted to. I was. I was going to bring
it up, but you beat me to it. I was
gonna say thank you. Uh, you and your wife were
(05:02):
both very very sweet, very sweet get out of the class.
Yeah you're like you're like, you know what, No, yeah,
tough love ballrooms not for you, because obviously it wasn't
for your dad. Just five minutes. It was so cute man.
(05:24):
I it was so sweet to to see your family
like that, not on the rest of the COVID season,
and also meet your wife, you know, per well, thank
you to you and yours. Uh, you and your wife
were both amazing as well. And you know, I told
my daughter, I said, I really wish you would have
(05:46):
met you know, Val sooner and not the last class
of the third day where she was literally about to
like pass out from exhaustion, because it was it was
pretty it was pretty gnarly, you know, especially you for
the minis to not have any lunch breaks. It's like
seven or eight classes in a row. It's a lot.
But hats off to all the all the kids, especially mine.
(06:09):
I mean, it was a it was a trooper and
she did fantastic. So hey, a J you want to
introduce Renee? Yes you obviously you guys know that that
chick right there. Uh, but I'd like to introduce you
both to a long time friend of mine, Mr Renee Alisondo,
(06:30):
also a dancer and co host of Pretty Up. Was
a dancer, but you do you still dance? Nobody nobody
ever was a dancer. Yeah, we always are. Well, my
back kind of disagrees. My back says you were a dancer.
(06:52):
How are you boys? Um? Perfectly, personally, I'm feeling exactly
my age. It's twenty two exhausted. Um, no, we we
were in rehearsal day. I don't even know what day
it is. It does feel, um incredibly, Um, it feels
incredible to be to have the opportunity, you know, like
(07:14):
a year older, maybe a little bit wiser, definitely a
little grayer. And the perspective is that we set out
and you take something away, you know exactly, you don't
know what you got until it's gone. And and this
was gone for a little bit and now we're here
and I try not to complain, but it still comes
out right right right, you can't stop that. Um. What
(07:36):
makes this tour stripped down? I'm really excited to see.
I'm very proud of you boys. What makes this tour
different from your other other shows? I mean, there there's
a lot Why do you have more space on your broth?
I'm just well, there's a little preview you guys. Honestly,
the name came around when we were just kind of
(07:58):
discussing the idea in the first place. There are a
lot of restrictions with going out on tour, and we
you know, we the idea was, there was a desire
to go out on tour. There was a desire to
be on a stage, travel the country, meet our fans,
reconnect with the people that I feel created this little
pseudo career you know of performing and being on TV
(08:21):
and on stage. I you know, I wanted to reconnect
with that. And plus I love live stage and I
love life stage with my brother because you know, he's
rarely prepared and a lot of authenticity is present. Um.
But yeah, and so that was the desire. How do
we do it? You know? And then we start asking
(08:41):
questions and then logistics come into play, and ultimately we're like, listen,
you know, this is literally stripped down. I mean, this
is like stripped down of staging of this, you know.
But it's what it lacks in terms of production, it
makes up for the storytelling. Right. So it's not just
a random show that there's a narrative for an hour
and a half. It's it's theater. It's what is the narrative?
(09:04):
The narrative, I would say the theme would be time
and how precious it is and and the good times,
the hard times, and and how time is also the
one thing that's constantly fleeting you can't get back, and
and because of that, that's really what creates this beautiful
struggle with life. Is that because time is fleeting, because
(09:28):
it's gonna end, that's what makes it so beautiful. Dispassion
Nice agreed, And you know, look, I can honestly relate
because you know, obviously we were in the middle of
a world tour and everything got shut down. But thankfully
I was able to, you know, with all the COVID
guidelines do the show with you guys, UM, in which
(09:51):
I got to meet one of my now closest friends,
Cheryl Um, which which brings me to kind of an
interesting question, Um, because it's been on my mind ever
since the show wrapped, and I'm just curious about what
your opinion is. Uh, do you think in your opinion
(10:14):
that myself and Cheryl got the shaft that we should
have made it to final four. I don't even need
to tell you to tell the truth, because you will anyway,
So I'll tell the truth. Are definitely Um underachieved? Now,
whether underachieved was something that you under achieved in the
quality of dance, or whether it was an unfair elimination
(10:36):
too early. Either way, it was not what I expected
going into the season. But I can't you know, it's
heartbreaking for you. But I think Cheryl over time has
learned that they're there are heartbreaks on the show constantly.
Did I feel like it was a deserving elimination. No,
that's the answer that you know we should Max, because
(11:00):
Max Um actually did these YouTube videos right, you know,
and I saw a lot of them, and he was, Dude,
you were giving lots of lots of props our way.
I really, I, I honestly, genuinely appreciate it because I'm
my own worst critic, I'm my own worst enemy, as
all of us are so stepping into something that I mean,
I'm a hip hop dancer. I've been dancing my whole
(11:20):
life since I was four years old, never attempted anything
like ballroom and I do have the utmost respect for
it more now than ever putting myself in that in
that world. Um and you guys, all three of you,
I mean, are like the staple of ballrooms. So you
(11:40):
know what, what did you think? I would like to
intervene real quick and just say one more thing. I
think that Um, it was a unique season, and because
of that, it took away something that I think is
really something that you were the best at on our
show is your experience in front of a live audience,
packed audience, that relationship. I mean, it just brings it
(12:05):
brings you alive. I think your presence on the show,
your demeanor, your how relaxed you got after a few weeks.
You would have felt so much more confidence when you
would have heard the roar and been able to have
that third partner. You didn't have that, and I think
we all I think that's honestly, that's another element that
at least I missed, because I totally I was. I
(12:25):
made a j sing to me during the show because
I could it was like crickets. I could hear the
freaking judges breathed down my neck. It would have definitely
it would have definitely led the audience to lead the
show as well. You know, we let them be the
not let them we we always include the audience as
a huge component. You take it away, it's just the
script of judges opinion. That's my opinion. Absolutely I agree
(12:48):
down this line. But in my opinion, I respected your
effort and and it wasn't about pointed toes or technique
quality and not on this show now when you have
four days to learn years of technique and repetition and
and try to settle it into your body. Um, I
do not appreciate visually underwhelming efforts. You know, and you that,
(13:13):
and you clearly put out a hundred ten and and
and for that, I wanted to see you every week
in the contrast with some of other competitors who probably
were underwhelming, you know, because and and and with within
a better like quality dance or whatever it is. And
it's actually funny. What's actually funny is the other day
on fourth of July, I was telling some of mine
(13:37):
and Renee's friends about the experience on the show, and
I was like, yeah, da da dah, and oh my god,
if I had to hear the word frame one more
time from Cheryl and I was trying to do a
frame and my wife goes, so that that doesn't look right, babe,
that doesn't look good. I'm like you, now you too, Jesus,
Come on, um, it's hard. It's hard just going through
(14:00):
this process. Like my head's off to everyone, but not everyone,
but you know, everyone in any capacity in terms of
the participant. It is a grueling undertaking and to be
in a room with Max not but God forbid, you
have a giant following, right, and you just suck a
(14:22):
dance on everything and they just drag you across this
form of a show for two and a half months
and you just want to like this, how do I
get out of here? You know? Those I feel even
worse for it, Like you probably should have known what
you're signing up for. It looks easy though, Like I mean,
every celebrity that works into like, oh my god, we
thought it was way easier than it actually is. And
(14:42):
I'm like, yeah, no, I have a question. I have
a question for you guys. Um I also come from
the creative world, and you know, to me, it's it's
a miracle that anything ever gets done because you know,
we're all there's a lot of egos that come into play.
That's just the way things are, right And and um,
(15:05):
I was fortunate enough to work with Janet Jackson for
many years, but for her, it just came down to
what she wanted, right. So my my question to you
guys is and watching a j with the Backstreet Boys
survived for twenty years somehow, what is your guys, what
what your creative process? What happens when you guys are
(15:26):
at a creative impasse? How do you guys handle that?
I mean, we we are completely you know, um, we
have very different week we as tight as we are,
and share will tell you we you know, had to
be separated from living to them, you're sharing a bad
bunk beds until because Peter was pregnant. She got pregnant.
(15:48):
That's how we moved out. Finally, I was that we
got six years apart though, and I think we do
have obviously differences. We take different approaches. I have a
different history with the show. I have a different understanding
of the show. Um, I thought that your question was
kind of going somewhere else, but actually it was I
(16:09):
was thinking, yeah, yeah, sorry, I was thinking, like on
your road show, right, the one you guys have put together. Uh,
That's what I was thinking about. How like everyone has
creative impasses because you're we're individuals, right, and so how
do you guys handle if you guys feel strongly about
the direction it needs to be? How do you guys
(16:30):
handle that? I mean, I get I can still say
so with this particular project we walked into the room.
And then day one, um, we've you know before the
first choreographer would come, you know, and she would know
all the people that we're working with, and and we're lucky,
We're lucky. We reached out to friends of ours and
we just said, hey, we're doing this. If you you
could say no, please feel free and everybody was gracious
(16:52):
to say. But anyway, before the first day, the first day,
before the firstchoreographer came, we had blocked off a couple
hours just to put together a couple of eights of
choreography whatever. And we walked in and the first thing
that happened is we both were strong about like the
beginning of this church and it wasn't even a choreography yet,
and we immediately had a conversation about, look, let's just
(17:15):
let's just let somebody drive the strain, right, Like, if
we cannot be successful regardless of who's driving, if there's
two steering wheels right and the set of sets of
pedals right, somebody's got to be on the seat right.
I'm gonna tell you right now, I have absolutely zero
pride and ego and ambition about who's driving. And I'm
(17:36):
as having an incredible time watching him drive the creative
in most of the instances because I know that well,
I mean, I'm just saying like, because I know that
I shared the same values in terms of what we're
trying to put out. We've done this couple of times before,
um in a bigger scale but also in the big
(17:57):
scale of creative and and it's proven itself. But again,
we respect each other. I'm gonna say it, and and
and and I don't easy easy easy moments where I
can step in and we have that benter we all
we also know each other well after a lot of
time working together, so you know, I would never put
(18:19):
him in a position where he looks bad or right,
there's trust, ever fought? Have you ever just gotten a disagreement? Yes,
just like even thirty Today's morning. I think that's another thing.
It's like we just need to check ourselves and realize that.
That's why I yeah, that's why I asked, because like
(18:41):
with with the Backstreet Boys, there's five of them, and
so they go to the democratic process, right, It's like
that's what we try to do. But then sometimes it
you know, because sometimes like there was a six year
period where we're down to four members. One of our
members left to you know, start a family, do odd way,
follow some of his other dreams. And during that time
(19:04):
we had to have someone else steer the ship. Because
if you have two guys that now that say it's red,
and two guys say it's blue, we're in. Now we're stuck.
So you you know, management comes in, the publicist comes in.
Hell sometimes even our freaking lawyers came in to help
move things along. You know, now again twenty eight years later,
(19:27):
there is like you said, Val, we we we know
each other so well now that we know. Okay, I'm
not even gonna bring this up because I know it's
gonna get shut down, so why haven't waste the time?
But I know what each guy's thinking. I know what
each guy's probably gonna say, So I know, okay, this
is how we get shipped done. You know you're the
(19:49):
O G. So does whatever you say go? No? But
I used to be a mute when it came to
making decisions because I just didn't want to rock the boat.
I never wanted to, you know, stir up hot. Have
any of the guys mad at me? Now if I
don't like it, I'll tell you I don't. I don't
like it. I'll just be like, Nope, that's a dumb idea.
You're not dumb, but the idea is dumb. Let's find
(20:11):
something else because that's not gonna work, or that's gonna
turnish the brand or whatever the case is. Um, you
know it is. It's gonna say that. I just wanted
to point out it is very wise. I love what
you said. Um to standing wheels isn't gonna cut it right.
Understanding that is really important. I agree with you. If
(20:34):
two people, Yeah, at the end of the day, for me,
it's all about the work. Like me, with all due respect,
you know, Like if you're my brother and you're you're
not you're not doing you know, you're compromising the work,
I'm gonna love you, but I'm not gonna work with you.
If you're my friend, we put we put friends on.
It's all about creating our own village. Cheryl knows the vibes.
(20:57):
We all work with friends and family something for better
and for worse. But when the product suffers, I will
you know, I'm ruthless when it comes to that because
at the end of the day, my responsibility or response,
everybody's collective responsibility shouldn't be about who wants to drive,
and rather how we get to where we need to get,
so that exactly our audience has the you know, our
(21:20):
partners have what you know, there's you guys all have
the same goal at the end of the day as
it comes from the ballroom part and Renee well and
and also like aj, you would understand too now that
you spend all the time with Cheryl and what what look,
what happened? You met somebody and three months later you
guys are best friends. And you know, I'm just saying that,
you know, we've grown up. We grew up with that
(21:42):
we could be whoever we are as people. But what
we do know is how to work with a partner
right and when the partnership becomes multiplied. Um, I just
want to also say that in our particular case, if
the lawyers would have to get involved, then moms would
get involved, and moms, it's not it's around with any
of the situation that's gonna go down, everybody's gonna get
slapped and then we're gonna have dinner together. And yeah, exactly,
(22:04):
and we would probably not be you know, we I
would personally exit that you know, because we can do
that a piece of mind, and not not that a
working environment is always going to be peaceful. You know,
there's turbulence and and for better. But if I don't
have camaraderie on in the world, I'm not gonna I'm
(22:27):
not gonna do well. And that's just really quickly, Rene sorry,
and that that was another reason for doing this project.
You know. We we ended up with a situation where
we just had ourselves and we looked around and we said, look,
well let's just do it ourselves, right, And so here
we are doing it ourselves. We don't have the production
company support. We are your own boss. We don't have
(22:50):
marketing team support. We brought in our friends, like Val said,
and so we're putting it together. What are we pego wise?
You know? And and I think this is a culmination
of what what is a bit? I don't know, twenty
years plus years of doing stuff together, do you know
the evolution? The reason I guess I end up bringing
(23:13):
it up is that, you know, I do have decades
in in show business, from directing, the songwriting too, dancing,
choreography and different things. But what I noticed, like when
I worked with Janet for many years the same thing, camaraderie.
We wanted the camaraderie, We wanted everyone to feel like family, right,
(23:33):
But once in a while I would notice the fame
would start to get to certain people. They started their
heads started getting too big, and all of a sudden,
they were no longer in the spirit of the show,
the team. It's it was all about them. So that's
why I asked that question. I think that that you
guys are well aware that like the bigger you get,
(23:56):
the harder you have to work at keeping your feet
on the ground. Right. Yeah, it's also probably a harder
process of selecting who you want to work with. You
have to earn the right to be selective, and you
have to put out the type of work that earns
you that right. And once you earn that right, then
you have to really take your time and and I
think it's it's something that we've always um prioritized because
(24:20):
if you do it right, it's a lot easier to
go through this process. Renewed that you're saying absolutely so,
you know, just your your own boss phrase, you know, like,
I'm not a boss, I'm you know, I'm a collaborator.
I'm one of the teams. You know, I'm one of
the members on the team, and my role is maybe
potentially to to make the final decision. Okay, but you know,
(24:43):
I look at it as a huge privilege to be
able to have two dancers with us alongside. Privileged to
have my brother. Sometimes they take it for granted, but
other people that are are helping us create the show,
you know, I can never take for grant. We're collaborated.
I'm it's a privilege is that you're willing to come
here and share your talent and time and effort. I
(25:16):
just want to shift gears for a second, because you know, uh,
this whole trio came to be UM at the beginning
of last season of Nancy with the Stars UM, and
you know, kind of the epicenter of what this show,
you know, is it's built around, is we all three
(25:41):
of us are sober. All three of us have gone
off the deep end multiple times and made it back
up on shore. UM. And you know, so we're always
just talking about living life on life's terms, talking about
what it's what it's been like for everybody during COVID
(26:01):
and mental health issues, which is a big, big thing
now finally being more publicly spoken about, and I look,
I I know the stresses I've dealt with, you know,
being being with four other guys from four different walks
of life, and we are family, we are brothers. We
know this is our first marriage. All five of us
are married with kids, but this will forever be our
(26:23):
first marriage period. And there's been highs and lows that
we've all dealt with together, as I'm sure all of
the pros on Dancing with the Stars have have experienced
highs and lows with each other. Because you are family,
you are family. So I just want to say to Cheryl,
how did it make you feel? Or ask you not
(26:44):
to say, do you ask you? How did it make
you feel after the recent interview that you did, that
you got such great support from these two boys. How
did that make you feel? I mean, honestly, it's it's
it means the world to me. But also I care
more are about like people like Max and VL right
what they think, more than the general public in a way,
(27:06):
because like we do have history, right, so it does
in a way like I do look to them and
you know, my other co workers and friends for validation.
So it is comforting to know that these two have
been very supportive for sure. So Fellas, what do you
think has been the biggest change that you've seen in Cheryl?
(27:27):
Because like you know when well, no, look like obviously
when I met her, because I have been asked her
when we got into like probably like week one or
week two, I was like, did we have a party together?
Because I don't remember something I don't remember. I don't
remember And it's sad that we may have and we
both don't remember it. But you know, that's just that, Yeah,
(27:50):
that's just the way that it goes when you're out
and you're doing all the all that bad ship. But
I mean, how how how how much have you seen
her change? It's those days you know, Max, not Max,
it's Max valance, you know, a lot, a lot with
(28:11):
a lot, And yeah, this is a question about Cheryl.
I just also would like to say that we've all changed.
I mean that's the right progression, right evolved. Yeah, and
you wouldn't have you know, Cheryl wouldn't have been glowing
as bright as she glows now. Her clothes got brighter,
if anything. Literally know, you you wouldn't have the type
of perspective and gratitude that you have and shrink if
(28:33):
you didn't have those times. And as much as we
want to obviously correct the past, you don't want to
necessarily change all of them, you know, because that's that's
what it means. You know, a j We're gonna need
a separate show and a lot more times and lawyers, lawyers,
that's him. But no, but I'm saying like I will
(28:56):
gladly talk about what what would, in my opinion be
probably the most interesting years. And again this is just
in grand scheme of things. The most interesting years of
Dancing with the Stars were from two thousand five till
you know, some period of time when it started a
social media where it started to go to changes that
just took away from what it wasn't and what it's
(29:18):
now something else, you know. But you know, we we
grew up here. I have to say that in that
way because I know Cheryl way before Dancing with the Stars.
I know Sheryl since the youth days and the Junior
two days, not maybe the Junior two but the youth
days for sure. We're talking about thirteen fifteen years old
categories where I am as a coach traveling with my
(29:41):
students who are also thirteen fifteen, you know, and so, um,
I've I've seen the transformation. I have to say this
way to answer your question about Cheryl and what I
think about the changes is that that thing that you
guys are discussing. Um, I'm personally have to admit I'm
(30:02):
unfamiliar with that. You know, so I be more educated.
But what I am familiar with is the transformation that
Cheryl had made through all these decades. I mean, I
can't focus on sobriety alone, and and and and say things.
I can't focus on partying alone. I can also focus
on the fact that she has become one of the
(30:24):
biggest names and television. I can also focus on the
fact that she's always shown up. I can focus on
the fact she's probably the most stable staple off Dancing
with the Stars dance professionals. Um, I mean I did
not provide the show with sense of security whatsoever. You know,
(30:45):
don't worry. I'll I'll definitely venmo you after the interview
is over. That's my honest opinion. And on the personal level,
you no on on early in the day. You know,
Share always helped me personally through a lot, and I
think that you know, I like I said for me
(31:05):
that stuff that we all have things we deal with,
you know. Um, like I said, we all have things
we deal with. I don't know how else to dwell
into it, but I just Cheryl was always like I mean,
also the other thing is like ageless, Like I felt
like you were much older when you were only twenty two,
(31:26):
right you joined Dancing with the Stars, you know. Also
like what you said at the peak and when it
was you were a list if you were on Dancing
with the Star at that time, you know. And so
that's a lot of pressure and a lot of growth.
And I just remember that's a lot of pressure on
the one year old is dead. The way Cheryl was
(31:48):
like again not to the old digression father, there was
no blueprint for us. We just went in blind and
we fought our way to kind of some sort of
you know, also having a voice, you know, such a
big you know, and and it was a lot and
facilitate changes and facilitate you know, doors to be open
(32:11):
and steps, especially coming from the competitive ballroom world, because
I mean I was dancing with jose DeCamps right before
I did Dancing with the Stars, and just that camaraderie
just between me and my partner, and Alan Tornsburg, my
dance coach. I there was no room for my opinion
or a voice, right, So I literally was looking at
old VHS tapes that I converted from my YouTube channel,
(32:33):
and I had an English accent. Do you remember that? Guys?
Remember my little tiny mouse voice that sounded kind of
like I was from England. I kind of wasn't sure where.
I don't think she knew where she was from. Apparently
my identity I had none, right, And then Umi, you
were half Russian somehow, like totally I know. I'm still
(32:55):
trying to figure that out. I'm actual Ashkenazi Jew. Did
you know that he definitely got Russian over here? My
first name is actually Russian Alexander, which translates to Sasha.
So welcome to the show, by the way. To bring
(33:15):
it back and circle it back to where we should
be talking about, is this tour coming up? But the
tripped down is and and Shell knows the gentleman that
we're talking about. But our dad is actually our you know,
formal manager. So so we're doing that that way, and uh,
and we're doing it with pleasure and pride. He's probably
(33:36):
the most organized person we know anyway. Um, but but
that's the other thing again, ag, it's not you know,
we we were some some some show asked us about
Sherylae and it's probably what you're referring to a couple
of or a week ago. Like we we have a
relationship beyond how the world met us, which is on television.
(33:56):
You know, like she knows our father, you know, so
obviously the family Like, that's not like going to be
like so I so you know, look so val as
you now know my well, both of my daughters are
(34:17):
both in dance. My oldest is in competitive dance. Um,
you know all of us are married here, you know,
so you know children down down the road. If if
our kids want to get into competitive dance or be
on this level that we all are, how do you, like,
would you I'm I'm assuming all of us would obviously
(34:41):
support that, but would you encourage it or would you
be like, you know what, it's a lot of work,
it's a little stressful, would be dance Dad's yeah? Or
or would you be like maybe I I maybe you know,
I freaking went through all this. I don't know if
it's right for you. You know, I would definitely encourage
it for sure. Yeah, I think. I mean, especially what
(35:03):
we mentioned about your daughter in that weekend, they three
forty classes later. Competition is that like they go through
a lot, you know. And I'm not I'm very grateful
to my competitive dance career that that equipped me with
life long tools that even as an entrepreneur or not
not just as a creative, you know. So I think
(35:24):
dance in general, especially for kids, will teach the magility, discipline,
how to, how to work together with others, how to
you know, be in public. They're not going to have
this stigma of how to. They're gonna know how to
conduct themselves properly with confidence but humility, you know. And
hopefully I think the most important thing is the teachers
that are standing in front of those kids, you know.
(35:44):
And if you could, if you're lucky enough to find
a teacher that's gonna care and be accountable for the
voice and the and then the things that are coming
into you know, that's my thought. But I teach my kid,
I would help my kid, but I would have someone
else probably teaching coach my kid. But I gotta say, like,
(36:06):
in light of what he just said, you have to
find a teacher as a parent and a j you
would say it. And you know, Renee, I'm not sure
if you have kids. But that's the hardest part is
that's the hardest part when you bring your kid and
drop him off in in in in nursery or pre
kid or gymnastics, and and then endorsed closed and you
have no idea and my heart is just like on
(36:27):
the floor next next to the door until I pick
him up. I'm like, the first question is always how
was it you have fun? Was it okay that you're okay? Yeah? Yeah,
I had a great time. You want to come back?
That's my first question. You want to come back? Like, yeah, dance.
He did not want to come back to but I
saw through the window was happening. It's just like the
wait a minute, not my thing. So yeah, bringing him
(36:49):
every week consistently and and and just drop him off
and leave. And I have a four and a half
year old now he recently had a recital and I
lost my ship. I'm gonna tell you right now. In there,
we've been there beause zero expectations because every time I
drop him more up, I would beat and I would
go have coffee. I'm like, I don't want to sit
through this nervousness of him not doing anything and me
(37:11):
feeling some kind of way. So I'm with Valve. Uh.
I have to admit that our process is the same
as what I've gone through, is how do we limit
his free time? How do we give him as much
opportunity as possible? Uh? And again I have to agree
with about the fact that you you were saying, oh
my god, how hard this weekend is. Classes like that,
(37:34):
but amazing it is for you more long run, and
so I would welcome that. Oh yeah, I mean I'm
sitting there as a proud father watching watching EVA and
just you know, knowing like I wish I had that
when I was a kid, that you know, that type
of you know, structure in the sense of competitive dance.
(37:54):
In this that year, I just love to dance, and
I took every style of dance. Hip hop and j
as were the two that really stuck with me. We yes,
thank you very much, thank you very much. So before
we let you guys go, I just want to go
back to the show. Um, you know, look, this is
what what you guys are doing is a It's fantastic
(38:16):
be Thank god live shows are coming back. People are
dying to see anything. Uh, you know, and there is
such a huge core fan base between the two of you. Um,
I know you've kind of touched on it, but I
just want you to have you both to reiterate one
one final time. What can people expect from this show?
(38:37):
What are they going to take home from this show
that maybe they haven't seen before? And where can they
get tickets? M Um, I'm gonna I'm gonna start. I
gonna start with the with the maxim Valts or dot
com for tickets. Now. Now we only have nineteen cities,
(38:59):
so it's very limited engagement. We're kind of pushing it
for a month of August. I'm looking forward, um up north,
so call your mom's thing, like everybody coming through um
the show. Val will put it eloquently, or I would
(39:22):
say that, you know, it's it's the project that we
kindled my love. We we engaged me with dance in
the way that I can now participate in conversations about
how much I love dance. You always gonna miss you,
miss Jenna and Peter like, is it weird that I mean,
I'm sure it's gonna be nice. Just the boys, right
and your dad being your tour manager. But how about
(39:43):
your girls. Well no, we're definitely gonna miss him, but
that but we just couldn't afford you can't afford them
for you, guys, take a break. We're gonna do this.
The show is first of all, it's it's a family show. Uh.
There's a lot of comedy. There's a lot a theater,
you know, to us, the inspiration of like John laguzamo
(40:04):
a live on stage, you know, the one man shows,
even bol Berman like like you know, the the artists
that can go on stage and have a compelling story,
so compelling enough to tell that you know, it's captivating
to watch and then you walk away really inspired, connected, motivated,
you know. So imagine that with Dan's with spoken word
(40:28):
and uh and a lot and a lot of heart. Right,
So this comedy and heart that that I feel like
is what and specifically this personality right here right right
and lots of stripping or is that just a title?
I am taking up pencil? Thank you? Okay? I wanted to.
I wanted to. I wanted to commend you guys because
(40:50):
two things that stuck with me. One is the teacher.
It is so important who's teaching your kids, right, because
it is a competitive world, especially dance, you know, where
you're being judged and this and that. I think it's
so important to always infuse lessons of life, and it
sounds like your show is doing that by you saying
(41:11):
this is about time, how fleeting time is essentially be
in the moment, right and to me, being able to
mix a beautiful art form like dance but with lessons right,
it's almost like putting putting the medicine in the hot dog.
You know. We kept talking about the show again, like
(41:35):
just not to read read a hundreds of time, but
the fact that our stories are so real and we
we we put ourselves on stage in the reality. We
also went through, you know, the pandemic for example, and
we also are just us. I'm also a father and
also a husband. You know, he's also a husband and
you know a son. You know. So what you guys
(41:56):
are very open with your lives. I mean, value wrote
a book. I mean it's your What you see is
what you get. You know, we put it on stage
and there will be people in the audience that will relate,
that will connect and and we'll lift through this right. Well,
were because we're proud we're proud of the you know
I think. Yeah, anyway, I do expect my v I
(42:17):
P tickets sent to me so I can come to
the show. All of us want to come to you
drive home to the Bay Area. So what date are
you there? We're in Walnut Creek on of and that's
something that's date and after that will go well, maybe
I'll see if the white people used to have a
little getaway weekend away from the kids for for I
(42:40):
see creek. You don't understand how grateful I'm going to
be too. Guys, boys, we need to take a road trip,
but I don't but to put that type of pressure
on you. So there's I can't put that pressure. There
are tons of pressure. Maxwell put that kind of pressure
on me though, I know that, and so will I. Yes,
thank you guys so much. Coming on go check out
(43:00):
the Stripped Down Tour and you can get tickets and
all your information at Max and Vale tour dot com.
Thank you fellas, to see you soon than pleasure. Have
a good one, guys. All right, you guys, we're gonna
take a quick little break and when we come back,
we're gonna answer some of your questions before we wrap
(43:20):
it up. Stay tuned. All right, you guys, we are
back from break uh and it's time for the Listen
the question section of the show. I don't know why
(43:41):
I decided to talk like this, but I'm doing it anyways.
Um So listen you guys, always, always, always, all of
our amazing listeners and fans of the show. You guys
send us questions every week and we much much much
much appreciate it as well as hit that subscribe button.
Give us five stars, keep this bad Boy going. So
(44:02):
our first question comes ask you the first question because
it's for you. It's from Christina. Christina. Hi, Christina, Okay,
so a j Are you done getting tattoos? If not,
what will the next one be? And where Here's a
short and sweet answer. No, I am not done getting
tattoos and the next one, um is either going to be.
(44:25):
I'm going to start, uh start working below the belt. Um.
I have yet to do my legs, but I do
want to start on my shins and my als. Um.
I already know what I want to get on my
right leg. I want to get a scene from one
of my favorite films of all time, Nightmare Before Christmas
(44:49):
with Jack and Sally and zero and then on my
left leg. All you yeah, no, for all, for all
you eighties babies, um that remember the Muppet Show. Uh,
there was a band on The Muppet Show called Electric
Mayhem Dr Teeth Animal Janice. Uh, so I want to
(45:12):
get Electric Mayhem tattooed on my left leg. So the
answer would be, you're You're never gonna be finished. No, no,
no no, there's going to come a point where I
will be finished. Um it sucks, well no, no, but
cheeks definitely no. But you know what Stevo has. Stevo
has probably one of the best tattoos ever. He has
(45:33):
your name tattooed on his ass cheek, which is phenomenal.
He has your name tattooed on his ass cheeks, not
as the words your name, it's so good and the
other name. It's just right on it. I think it's
his right cheek. It says your name. I think it's genius.
Um no, but I think at some point. Uh. You
(45:55):
know what sucks is is that one of my tattoos
I have on my back was done by a very
very famous tattoo artist in uh Amsterdam who goes by
the name of Hanky Panky Hank and he is. He's
a legend in the tattoo world, and he has since
retired from what I've heard. And I thought I was
(46:16):
born in the Year of the Dragon. Uh, clearly I
am not. Uh. That's that's what alcohol and tattoos will
do it for you. I think I'm born in the
Year of the Rabbit. Way off. Um. But I've tried
to get it covered up. And any tattoo artist worth
their salt who knows who did it will never cover
(46:36):
it up. It's like sacrilegious in the tattoo community. Oh yeah,
oh yeah. Plus most tattoo artists won't. They won't. I could,
but you know what no, I mean now that I
know it's it's so like it's so taboo, like I'm
not gonna touch it. So all right, we have Our
next question is from Liz uh. Liz asks what is
(46:59):
the one thing all of you have learned about yourself
being sober? You go first, what's the one thing or
just name one thing you've learned. The shortest, simplest answer
would be that I learned that I'm not less than
and to me, that has given me the personal freedom
(47:21):
I always searched for through drugs. Drugs and alcohol made
me sort of numb to this feeling of being less than,
and so doing the work, I was able to get
rid of all that crap, and I no longer feel
less than. It doesn't mean I feel better than it
just feel I just feel a part of an equal
(47:43):
part of the universe and anyone else. So I thought
you were going to say that you finally figured out
that you're Mexican. Oh, my god, way to ruin it.
It turns out it turns out that's beautiful. Oh that
would be the short answer would be I discovered through
(48:04):
the process of being sober that I'm not less than.
And that's the one thing that I didn't think I
would ever get to. I think for me, the one thing,
or one of many things I've learned in my sobriety
is um is that it's okay to fail at things. Um.
(48:25):
You know, I used to beat myself up all the time.
Failure was never an option for me, and if I
did fail at something, I would literally wallow in my
own ship and beat myself up and you know, drink
and whatever over it and just mask it like it's
a you know, a liquid band aid with booze. But
today I know, you know what, if I fail at something,
(48:49):
it just means I have to work a little harder,
you know, the you know next time it's and it
looks it's okay to not be perfect. It's a failure
as success, you know, like if you haven't failed, how
can you succeed exactly exactly? And you share the well
I've learned, I guess more about my connection with God
(49:10):
and my higher power. Um. I think that I never
even really I always thought it was woo woo, and
I never I guess I just was too drunk most
of the time to even think about that, right, like,
because I believe that when you're doing something that may
not be um pure to who you are, it's really hard.
(49:33):
I think that that that vision of spirituality very rarely
comes in. So I think being sober has really, I guess,
connected me to my faith more and spirituality. So I
love that. I love that. That's my story to Cheryl.
I came into the program just not not an atheist.
(49:56):
I always believe there was something, but I was more
trying to avoid that something. I thought that something was
judging me, looking down at me, you know, like with
a lot of disappointment. So I was like, no, I
got to avoid this whole higher power thing. But it
turns out to be the thing that has helped me
get to a place where I believe I'm no longer
(50:19):
I no longer believe I'm less than because we obviously
can't do this on on our own. And you know,
at the end of the day, you know, let's say,
God forbid, you're in a place where you can't phone
a friend or you can't call someone. All you gotta
do is close your eyes and talk to your higher
power and there you go, and you can have that
(50:40):
exact same conversation and get that same comfort to hopefully
help you not pick up. And I want to take
a second, just a second, you guys, to just thank
our listeners. Um. They they've been reaching out a lot
lately about how the show is having a positive impact
on their lives, whether it's UH eating disorders, whether it's
(51:04):
anxiety disorders, whether it's addiction alcohol, living with an addict.
There's been like an influx of people saying thank you
and wanting me to pass along to you guys the
thank you. Just yesterday someone someone wrote me and said
that you know your story. Cheryl really touched her because
(51:26):
she's been sober for a few years but never did
any of the work in the program, but also has
never received or or been able to feel that freedom
that we talk about. And she said, you making the
decision publicly too step into the program before you drink
(51:50):
made her want to get into the program. Yeah, and
there's been there's been a lot of that. And so
I want to thank the listener, and I want to
thank you guys. I want to thank you guys for
being you too, buddy, thank you babe, because the truth
is you guys. Not everybody feels comfortable opening up, but
(52:11):
you know, we made a decision to tell our truth
and if it helps people, awesome. But this is what
I've learned to do, is just to be authentic in
order to keep feeling this awesome feeling of of like freedom,
not feeling like I'm missing out on anything. So I
want to thank you, Yes, yes, Cheryl, Yes, Thank you
(52:35):
guys as always for your questions, and thanks again to
Val and Max for joining us today. And you guys
stay safe out there, enjoy yourselves, be kind to one another,
and we will see you and talk to you next week. Bye.
Guys later Bye. Follow Pretty Messed Up on her radio,
(52:57):
or subscribe wherever you listen to podcasts to you
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