February 20, 2025 • 18 mins
FIRST THING: Ever put something off for way too long even though you know you want to do it? Amy breaks down why we do this to ourselves and how to stop.
SECOND THING: The first thing is about something you WANT to do, but what about tackling things you NEED to do? Amy's got encouragement for you (and herself) so y'all can just "do the dang thing."
THIRD THING: If you're in a season of waiting: just because you can’t see progress doesn’t mean nothing’s happening.
FOURTH THING: Amy talks about the ADHD paradox (because wow, it explains SO much!!)
HOST: Amy Brown // RadioAmy.com // @RadioAmy
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:13):
Cats up thing, little food for yourself life.
Speaker 2 (00:18):
Oh it's pretty bad. Hey, it's pretty beautiful.
Speaker 1 (00:21):
Thing beautiful that for a little more exciting, said, he
can cut your kicking with four thing with Amy Brown,
Happy Thursday.
Speaker 2 (00:33):
Four Things, Amy here and I've got an og episode
for you. Four totally different things, although I will say
the first and the second thing are sort of related,
Like the title of the first thing is why do
we put things off that we really want to do?
And the second thing is just do the dang thing?
But they are different and when you hear the things,
you'll understand why. Third thing is the ADHD paradox. I
(00:56):
found this very interesting when I saw it. And the
fourth thing encouragement for a season of waiting, because waiting
is hard, and if you happen to be in a
season of waiting, this will just give you that extra
nudge that you need to be patient.
Speaker 1 (01:13):
All right, let's get started.
Speaker 2 (01:16):
First, man, Right, all right, let's talk about why we
put things off that we really want to do. Like
I want you to think about something that you really
wanted to do but you put it off, or that
you currently really want to do but you are putting
it off at this exact moment, even though you know
it's something that you're going to totally enjoy and you
(01:36):
want to do it.
Speaker 1 (01:37):
I have done this many.
Speaker 2 (01:39):
Times now, about a year and a half ago, I
think it was maybe even two years at this point.
Time has been weird lately. I took an improv class
and I absolutely loved it. I left it feeling energized,
and I told myself that I would sign up for
another session soon. So they're eight week courses, yes, but
(02:01):
guess what, I totally put it off.
Speaker 1 (02:03):
And put it off and put it off.
Speaker 2 (02:05):
I originally signed up for improv after I had that
teeny tiny role in the Christmas movie Holiday Harmony. My
scene was in the bathroom. Not sure if y'all saw it.
My kids thought that my bathroom scene was hilarious. My
debut in a movie and I had my lines in
a bathroom. But I loved the entire experience. So after that,
(02:28):
I decided to take improv lessons and acting lessons to
you know, hone in on my skills. I obviously should
have done that stuff before I filmed the movie, but
I was playing myself and it was sort of a
last minute thing that I got invited to do, and
I was like, I don't have time to take any lessons.
I'm just gonna go for it. And I had no
idea how much I was gonna love the whole thing.
(02:50):
So then I decided I would like to pursue more
of these opportunities, So I'm gonna do the acting lessons,
I'm gonna do the improv.
Speaker 1 (02:58):
And I did all.
Speaker 2 (02:59):
That in the and then just stopped, stopped going, didn't
pursue anything. And I really think it boiled down to
that I feared the rejection. And I don't know why
we do this to ourselves, because I know better than
that I have heard from others. I've even shared on
this podcast. I know that we have to just go
for things. We can't fear the failure because even from
(03:23):
the failure, obstacle is the way we will learn from it.
We will grow from it. We have the question that
Donald Miller gave us, what does this make possible? So
I know all the things, So why was I putting
it off? Like why did I quit? And then why
did I just ignore it? Even though I've had it
on my list for sure the last six to eight months.
(03:43):
Sign up for another improv class. Sign up for another
improv class. Like when we know we want something and
then fear creeps in. Uh, it's the worst when the
fear wins. And that's what happened to me. I feel
like we easily can convince ourselves that we don't really
want it, because that's easier than failing. And it's sort
(04:05):
of what I started to tell myself. I'm like, well,
I guess it's not something that I really wanted, because
if I wanted it, I would be signing up for it.
Or we tell ourselves that we're going to wait for
the perfect time, then the perfect time never comes, and
we think about doing it so much that we exhaust
ourselves before we even get started. And that's exactly what
happened to me. However, I had a turning point today.
(04:28):
I finally signed back up for the improv classes. Like
before I hit record, I made myself go to the website.
I signed up. I'm going to be taking classes starting
in March. It'll be for eight weeks every Tuesday night,
six thirty to nine thirty. I'm sure I'll run into
some issues there, but I'm going to have to navigate
(04:50):
around it. This is something that's important to me. So
for the next eight weeks, that's where I'm going to
be on Tuesday nights. You can't miss more than two
or you have to you start over. And I did
level one a while back, and I got to do
level one again because so much time has passed. I
would feel ridiculous going into level two. So I'm gonna
(05:11):
start level one. I'm going to see how it goes,
and then if I still love it, I'm gonna roll
in to level two. But I'm proud of myself for
finally signing up for the class, and I hope that
that will encourage any of you. Right now, if there's
something you've been putting off, maybe even pause this right
now and go look up what it is you need
to do. Go to the website. Can you sign up
(05:32):
for it? Do you need to look at your calendar?
What is it you need to do? Like, if you've
been putting off something, ask yourself why you're putting it off.
Is it fear, is it perfectionism, is it lack of time,
whatever it is, Acknowledge why you're putting it off and
figure out a way to make it work. When we
(05:54):
do that, it will help get us out of the
what if cycle, which is what I need to get
out of, I will just know and I owe it
to myself to give it a try.
Speaker 1 (06:05):
And so do you.
Speaker 2 (06:09):
All right? So why is it so hard to do
the thing we know we need to do? This is
different from the first thing because in the first thing,
we're putting off something that we want to do. This
is something that we need to do, and we put
it off. Why do we do that? Whether it's a
difficult conversation, maybe sending a hard note or email, or
(06:30):
making a tough decision, I will put that off and
then it just causes more trouble for me. I tend
to get stuck in thought overload. I know this about myself.
My therapist gave me that term thought overload because I
have so many thoughts at once and it paralyzes me.
I was talking to my boyfriend about it the other
day and he could not relate to me, not one
(06:51):
single bit. He was like, I don't really know how
to help you through this. Because I have one thought
at a time, one task at a time. I finish
that thought or that task and then I move on
to the next. I cannot imagine what that must feel like,
must be amazing for me. I sat down to try
to figure out what I'm doing when I'm procrastinating a
(07:11):
hard task, and it boiled down to that I'm overthinking
every possible outcome. I don't want to deal with feeling uncomfortable,
like I don't want to deal with the discomfort that
that moment will cause me, and I somehow convince myself
that avoiding it will somehow make it easier later, when
(07:32):
I know with one hundred percent certainty that it does
not make it easier later. I've shared the buffalo versus
cow analogy before you know how buffalo will run into
the storm while cows turn away from it, ultimately staying
in the storm longer. I've shared that multiple times. I
even have this gold buffalo that my sister gave me
(07:53):
as a reminder. When I see the buffalo, I'm like,
be the buffalo, don't be the cow. Sometimes it's easier
to be the buffalo, and then sometimes I know I'm
just being the cal But I have that thought overload
and I just get paralyzed, like I don't take any
action when I know that taking action and doing it well,
That's another thing I get caught up on.
Speaker 1 (08:12):
If I'm being honest.
Speaker 2 (08:12):
Right now, I think about, Oh, I want this to
be warded so perfectly, and I want to do it well,
and I want it to be thoughtful, and I want
it to be kind, and I want to make sure
I'm staying on my side of the street. This is
an example of some conversations, like even in co parenting
with Ben, like I'll be drafting a text message or
an email with him or to him, and I'll delete
it like fifty times because I don't want to be
taken the wrong way. And I'm like, Okay, I'll just
(08:34):
make this a phone call because I feel like if
you were to read this on text or email, it's
going to come across the wrong way. But then we
like having things in email or text message because then
we can go back to it in case there's any
misunderstanding or miscommunication. It's good to have it in writing.
So there's that whole thing. Like that's an example, but
it could be a work related thing that you need
to tackle or something personal.
Speaker 1 (08:55):
But we got to be the buffalo.
Speaker 2 (08:57):
The band aid theory also is another good analogy. I
feel like, right now I need to go to my
bathroom and get a band aid out and put it
on my skin and practice just ripping it off.
Speaker 1 (09:08):
Because that's what I need to do.
Speaker 2 (09:09):
I have something that I'm putting off, and I just
need to look at it and rip it off because
I know I'm gonna feel the sting, but then I'm
gonna be able to move on. Because we all know
if we've had a band aid on and we start
to peel it off slowly and makes the pain last longer.
So why not just rip the band aid off? If
we need to just do the dang thing. We don't
need to prolong the discomfort. Let's just handle it. Here
(09:32):
are some ways that we can just do the dang thing.
Maybe we give ourselves a five minute rule, like we
tell ourselves I only have to think about this for
five minutes and then I'm doing it. Maybe I stop
rehearsing worst case scenario. That's another tip, Like our brains
will make up so many stories that probably will not happen,
(09:55):
and we just need to stop ourselves from doing that.
Speaker 1 (09:58):
Easier said than done, I know. And then another thing.
Speaker 2 (10:01):
We can do is treat it like a muscle. And
the more we start to tackle things head on, the
more we are the buffalo. The more we rip the
band aid, the easier it gets to continue to be that.
And I will say that I've had that experience before,
like when I've been the buffalo and I've done things
head on. Yes, I get into that groove and it
(10:21):
feels good. But sometimes I feel like I'm two steps forward,
two steps back, and then I have to pep talk
myself again. So that's what this is for you. If
you've been putting something off that needs to be done,
do the dang thing.
Speaker 1 (10:37):
The relief that we will feel after we do it
is going to be totally worth it. Here we got
the third day.
Speaker 2 (10:54):
Sometimes I need encouragement in the waiting. We all go
through seasons of waiting and it can be really difficult.
This came about because I got an email from a
listener asking me about this, and then I have my
own thing that I'm also waiting on. Sometimes I share
the emails, but when something is super personal, I will
(11:14):
reply back to the person just make sure, Hey, is
it okay if I read this say your name or
I can leave you anonymous and still read it. And
she just shared some very personal things where she was like, oh,
I'd rather you not say anything about the email, But
that's what brought up my desire to make this a
thing and talk about it and also helped me find
comfort in my own season of waiting that I'm in
(11:36):
right now and my patience and how my patience is
being tested, and my patience has been tested multiple times
in life, just like I'm sure the same is for you.
But the waiting doesn't get any easier. Sometimes waiting is
just hard period, whether it's waiting for an answer to something,
we're waiting for a breakthrough, or we just went clarity
(12:00):
on something. It's tough to feel like nothing is happening.
But even when nothing's happening, something is happening, like it's
not wasted time. And so as I was thinking through
what I was going to reply to the listener that
was asking me about this, and even you know, through
my own journaling, I'm just going to share with you
(12:21):
some things that God is doing while we are in
a season of waiting. And I know this first thing
I'm going to share has been very very helpful for
me to just keep in my back pocket and say
anytime that I need it, like sometimes delays are for
our own good and we're being protected from something that
(12:43):
we cannot see even when we don't understand it. So
that's one thing God could be doing.
Speaker 1 (12:48):
He could also be.
Speaker 2 (12:49):
Preparing something bigger for us than we could ever even
ask for. He could be strengthening our patients, which is
literally what is happening to me at this moment. I
am worried about something that I don't need to be
worried about.
Speaker 1 (13:07):
I can wait to worry.
Speaker 2 (13:09):
I'm creating scenarios that don't need to be created during
my season of waiting when I just need to be
still and for me, because faith is an important part
of my life, I need to make sure that my
faith is in check, it's in the right spot. Like
I'm not just making sure that a result happens. I
(13:31):
have to surrender and maybe I won't ever get clarity
on certain things, and I need to have peace either way,
and I need to trust that there's a process, something
bigger is happening. And sometimes waiting has nothing to do
with me, not one single bit. God might be aligning
things in other people's lives before it's time for something
(13:53):
to happen in my own, so there's nothing to do
with me, has nothing to do with you, and I
I just wanted to remind you and myself that in
the waiting, God is still working, the season is not wasted,
And for me personally, I'm really trying to focus on
trusting that what's ahead is even better than what I
(14:16):
could dream up at this very moment. So if you're
in a season of waiting like me, and like the
listener that emailed, you're not alone. I'm just sharing with
you all some of the thoughts that I replied to
them and that I journaled through myself. Trust the process,
trust his timing, and know that even in the silence,
(14:37):
things are happening.
Speaker 1 (14:47):
All right.
Speaker 2 (14:47):
Have you heard of the ADHD paradox? I saw this
post on Instagram from an account. It's Molly's Underscore ADHD
Underscore Mayhem, and it really resonated me. She was talking
about how ADHD creates contradictions in our behavior and if
you have ADHD you'll probably find this very relatable.
Speaker 1 (15:06):
Here's what you put up the ADHD paradox.
Speaker 2 (15:08):
Feeling very confident versus feeling very self conscious. I want
to do everything versus I don't want to do anything.
I can't focus versus I can't stop focusing. I want
a routine versus it's impossible for me to stick to one.
I have so much energy versus I am completely burnt out. Now,
(15:33):
if you don't have ADHD, then you don't really know
what it's like to have your brain constantly pulling you
into opposite directions. And this gives an example of what
it can be like. And it's not that we don't care,
We're not trying. It's just that our brains operate on
a different rhythm. Like imagine driving a car with only
two speeds parks your full throttle like sometimes there is
(15:55):
just no in between, and that's often how ADHD can feel.
Speaker 1 (15:58):
It's all or nothing thing.
Speaker 2 (16:00):
And for me, what's helpful is I have to identify
which mode I'm in. Am I in my burnout mode
or I'm in my hyper focus I'm about to get
stuff done mode, And then I have to adjust my
expectations accordingly, because if I know that it's a low
energy day, I cannot force high energy tasks. And I
(16:21):
try to pay attention to my body because that's how
I'm going to survive, especially as I'm unmedicated. I also
use opposite strategies like if I can't focus, I'll go
move my body like I'll jump on my rebounder. If
I'm overstimulated, I will do a five minute meditation, because
(16:42):
sometimes you don't really have a choice in what you
need to get done. I do try to listen to
my body when I can, but there are times when
it's like, well, okay, I get that I can't focus
right now, but also I have a deadline for something,
so I have to use opposite strategies to come in
and help me out. So if you have ADHD, you're
(17:02):
not alone in this paradox. Instead of fighting it, we
have to really just learn how to recognize our patterns.
That's been very, very helpful for me in my unmedicated
season of life, which now it's officially been. I feel
like I started over Christmas break. I was thinking it
was that the new year, but it was a little
(17:24):
bit before the first of the year, so I'm probably
coming up on two months no meds and really implementing
some of these strategies, which if you want more exercises
and things you can do for yourself, if you go
to YouTube and put in brain gem exercises for ADHD,
a lot of things will come up that are helpful
(17:46):
for adults to do and kids.
Speaker 1 (17:48):
So if you have a child that has.
Speaker 2 (17:51):
ADHD, you can look up some of these exercises and
start doing them with them at home. They're just like
easy things, like if they're home from school, maybe they're
having a burnout day they can't focus, try some of
these exercises.
Speaker 1 (18:03):
Or if you'll both have.
Speaker 2 (18:04):
ADHD, then you get to do the exercises together as
a family. So I hope that that's helpful, because the
extremes can feel pretty crazy, can feel very very high
and then very very low at times, which can be
confusing and confusing for those around you if they don't
really understand the ADHD paradox. So I hope that this
(18:26):
is helpful for someone. I'm not an expert, but I'm
thankful for all the accounts that I follow and the
people in my life and my therapist and people that
have helped me as I navigate some of this. All right,
hope y'all are having the day that you need to have,
and I will see you on Saturday for Outweigh and
(18:47):
then on Tuesday for the fifth thing with Kat.
Speaker 1 (18:49):
Bye.
Cats up thing, little food for yourself life.
Speaker 2 (00:18):
Oh it's pretty bad. Hey, it's pretty beautiful.
Speaker 1 (00:21):
Thing beautiful that for a little more exciting, said, he
can cut your kicking with four thing with Amy Brown,
Happy Thursday.
Speaker 2 (00:33):
Four Things, Amy here and I've got an og episode
for you. Four totally different things, although I will say
the first and the second thing are sort of related,
Like the title of the first thing is why do
we put things off that we really want to do?
And the second thing is just do the dang thing?
But they are different and when you hear the things,
you'll understand why. Third thing is the ADHD paradox. I
(00:56):
found this very interesting when I saw it. And the
fourth thing encouragement for a season of waiting, because waiting
is hard, and if you happen to be in a
season of waiting, this will just give you that extra
nudge that you need to be patient.
Speaker 1 (01:13):
All right, let's get started.
Speaker 2 (01:16):
First, man, Right, all right, let's talk about why we
put things off that we really want to do. Like
I want you to think about something that you really
wanted to do but you put it off, or that
you currently really want to do but you are putting
it off at this exact moment, even though you know
it's something that you're going to totally enjoy and you
(01:36):
want to do it.
Speaker 1 (01:37):
I have done this many.
Speaker 2 (01:39):
Times now, about a year and a half ago, I
think it was maybe even two years at this point.
Time has been weird lately. I took an improv class
and I absolutely loved it. I left it feeling energized,
and I told myself that I would sign up for
another session soon. So they're eight week courses, yes, but
(02:01):
guess what, I totally put it off.
Speaker 1 (02:03):
And put it off and put it off.
Speaker 2 (02:05):
I originally signed up for improv after I had that
teeny tiny role in the Christmas movie Holiday Harmony. My
scene was in the bathroom. Not sure if y'all saw it.
My kids thought that my bathroom scene was hilarious. My
debut in a movie and I had my lines in
a bathroom. But I loved the entire experience. So after that,
(02:28):
I decided to take improv lessons and acting lessons to
you know, hone in on my skills. I obviously should
have done that stuff before I filmed the movie, but
I was playing myself and it was sort of a
last minute thing that I got invited to do, and
I was like, I don't have time to take any lessons.
I'm just gonna go for it. And I had no
idea how much I was gonna love the whole thing.
(02:50):
So then I decided I would like to pursue more
of these opportunities, So I'm gonna do the acting lessons,
I'm gonna do the improv.
Speaker 1 (02:58):
And I did all.
Speaker 2 (02:59):
That in the and then just stopped, stopped going, didn't
pursue anything. And I really think it boiled down to
that I feared the rejection. And I don't know why
we do this to ourselves, because I know better than
that I have heard from others. I've even shared on
this podcast. I know that we have to just go
for things. We can't fear the failure because even from
(03:23):
the failure, obstacle is the way we will learn from it.
We will grow from it. We have the question that
Donald Miller gave us, what does this make possible? So
I know all the things, So why was I putting
it off? Like why did I quit? And then why
did I just ignore it? Even though I've had it
on my list for sure the last six to eight months.
(03:43):
Sign up for another improv class. Sign up for another
improv class. Like when we know we want something and
then fear creeps in. Uh, it's the worst when the
fear wins. And that's what happened to me. I feel
like we easily can convince ourselves that we don't really
want it, because that's easier than failing. And it's sort
(04:05):
of what I started to tell myself. I'm like, well,
I guess it's not something that I really wanted, because
if I wanted it, I would be signing up for it.
Or we tell ourselves that we're going to wait for
the perfect time, then the perfect time never comes, and
we think about doing it so much that we exhaust
ourselves before we even get started. And that's exactly what
happened to me. However, I had a turning point today.
(04:28):
I finally signed back up for the improv classes. Like
before I hit record, I made myself go to the website.
I signed up. I'm going to be taking classes starting
in March. It'll be for eight weeks every Tuesday night,
six thirty to nine thirty. I'm sure I'll run into
some issues there, but I'm going to have to navigate
(04:50):
around it. This is something that's important to me. So
for the next eight weeks, that's where I'm going to
be on Tuesday nights. You can't miss more than two
or you have to you start over. And I did
level one a while back, and I got to do
level one again because so much time has passed. I
would feel ridiculous going into level two. So I'm gonna
(05:11):
start level one. I'm going to see how it goes,
and then if I still love it, I'm gonna roll
in to level two. But I'm proud of myself for
finally signing up for the class, and I hope that
that will encourage any of you. Right now, if there's
something you've been putting off, maybe even pause this right
now and go look up what it is you need
to do. Go to the website. Can you sign up
(05:32):
for it? Do you need to look at your calendar?
What is it you need to do? Like, if you've
been putting off something, ask yourself why you're putting it off.
Is it fear, is it perfectionism, is it lack of time,
whatever it is, Acknowledge why you're putting it off and
figure out a way to make it work. When we
(05:54):
do that, it will help get us out of the
what if cycle, which is what I need to get
out of, I will just know and I owe it
to myself to give it a try.
Speaker 1 (06:05):
And so do you.
Speaker 2 (06:09):
All right? So why is it so hard to do
the thing we know we need to do? This is
different from the first thing because in the first thing,
we're putting off something that we want to do. This
is something that we need to do, and we put
it off. Why do we do that? Whether it's a
difficult conversation, maybe sending a hard note or email, or
(06:30):
making a tough decision, I will put that off and
then it just causes more trouble for me. I tend
to get stuck in thought overload. I know this about myself.
My therapist gave me that term thought overload because I
have so many thoughts at once and it paralyzes me.
I was talking to my boyfriend about it the other
day and he could not relate to me, not one
(06:51):
single bit. He was like, I don't really know how
to help you through this. Because I have one thought
at a time, one task at a time. I finish
that thought or that task and then I move on
to the next. I cannot imagine what that must feel like,
must be amazing for me. I sat down to try
to figure out what I'm doing when I'm procrastinating a
(07:11):
hard task, and it boiled down to that I'm overthinking
every possible outcome. I don't want to deal with feeling uncomfortable,
like I don't want to deal with the discomfort that
that moment will cause me, and I somehow convince myself
that avoiding it will somehow make it easier later, when
(07:32):
I know with one hundred percent certainty that it does
not make it easier later. I've shared the buffalo versus
cow analogy before you know how buffalo will run into
the storm while cows turn away from it, ultimately staying
in the storm longer. I've shared that multiple times. I
even have this gold buffalo that my sister gave me
(07:53):
as a reminder. When I see the buffalo, I'm like,
be the buffalo, don't be the cow. Sometimes it's easier
to be the buffalo, and then sometimes I know I'm
just being the cal But I have that thought overload
and I just get paralyzed, like I don't take any
action when I know that taking action and doing it well,
That's another thing I get caught up on.
Speaker 1 (08:12):
If I'm being honest.
Speaker 2 (08:12):
Right now, I think about, Oh, I want this to
be warded so perfectly, and I want to do it well,
and I want it to be thoughtful, and I want
it to be kind, and I want to make sure
I'm staying on my side of the street. This is
an example of some conversations, like even in co parenting
with Ben, like I'll be drafting a text message or
an email with him or to him, and I'll delete
it like fifty times because I don't want to be
taken the wrong way. And I'm like, Okay, I'll just
(08:34):
make this a phone call because I feel like if
you were to read this on text or email, it's
going to come across the wrong way. But then we
like having things in email or text message because then
we can go back to it in case there's any
misunderstanding or miscommunication. It's good to have it in writing.
So there's that whole thing. Like that's an example, but
it could be a work related thing that you need
to tackle or something personal.
Speaker 1 (08:55):
But we got to be the buffalo.
Speaker 2 (08:57):
The band aid theory also is another good analogy. I
feel like, right now I need to go to my
bathroom and get a band aid out and put it
on my skin and practice just ripping it off.
Speaker 1 (09:08):
Because that's what I need to do.
Speaker 2 (09:09):
I have something that I'm putting off, and I just
need to look at it and rip it off because
I know I'm gonna feel the sting, but then I'm
gonna be able to move on. Because we all know
if we've had a band aid on and we start
to peel it off slowly and makes the pain last longer.
So why not just rip the band aid off? If
we need to just do the dang thing. We don't
need to prolong the discomfort. Let's just handle it. Here
(09:32):
are some ways that we can just do the dang thing.
Maybe we give ourselves a five minute rule, like we
tell ourselves I only have to think about this for
five minutes and then I'm doing it. Maybe I stop
rehearsing worst case scenario. That's another tip, Like our brains
will make up so many stories that probably will not happen,
(09:55):
and we just need to stop ourselves from doing that.
Speaker 1 (09:58):
Easier said than done, I know. And then another thing.
Speaker 2 (10:01):
We can do is treat it like a muscle. And
the more we start to tackle things head on, the
more we are the buffalo. The more we rip the
band aid, the easier it gets to continue to be that.
And I will say that I've had that experience before,
like when I've been the buffalo and I've done things
head on. Yes, I get into that groove and it
(10:21):
feels good. But sometimes I feel like I'm two steps forward,
two steps back, and then I have to pep talk
myself again. So that's what this is for you. If
you've been putting something off that needs to be done,
do the dang thing.
Speaker 1 (10:37):
The relief that we will feel after we do it
is going to be totally worth it. Here we got
the third day.
Speaker 2 (10:54):
Sometimes I need encouragement in the waiting. We all go
through seasons of waiting and it can be really difficult.
This came about because I got an email from a
listener asking me about this, and then I have my
own thing that I'm also waiting on. Sometimes I share
the emails, but when something is super personal, I will
(11:14):
reply back to the person just make sure, Hey, is
it okay if I read this say your name or
I can leave you anonymous and still read it. And
she just shared some very personal things where she was like, oh,
I'd rather you not say anything about the email, But
that's what brought up my desire to make this a
thing and talk about it and also helped me find
comfort in my own season of waiting that I'm in
(11:36):
right now and my patience and how my patience is
being tested, and my patience has been tested multiple times
in life, just like I'm sure the same is for you.
But the waiting doesn't get any easier. Sometimes waiting is
just hard period, whether it's waiting for an answer to something,
we're waiting for a breakthrough, or we just went clarity
(12:00):
on something. It's tough to feel like nothing is happening.
But even when nothing's happening, something is happening, like it's
not wasted time. And so as I was thinking through
what I was going to reply to the listener that
was asking me about this, and even you know, through
my own journaling, I'm just going to share with you
(12:21):
some things that God is doing while we are in
a season of waiting. And I know this first thing
I'm going to share has been very very helpful for
me to just keep in my back pocket and say
anytime that I need it, like sometimes delays are for
our own good and we're being protected from something that
(12:43):
we cannot see even when we don't understand it. So
that's one thing God could be doing.
Speaker 1 (12:48):
He could also be.
Speaker 2 (12:49):
Preparing something bigger for us than we could ever even
ask for. He could be strengthening our patients, which is
literally what is happening to me at this moment. I
am worried about something that I don't need to be
worried about.
Speaker 1 (13:07):
I can wait to worry.
Speaker 2 (13:09):
I'm creating scenarios that don't need to be created during
my season of waiting when I just need to be
still and for me, because faith is an important part
of my life, I need to make sure that my
faith is in check, it's in the right spot. Like
I'm not just making sure that a result happens. I
(13:31):
have to surrender and maybe I won't ever get clarity
on certain things, and I need to have peace either way,
and I need to trust that there's a process, something
bigger is happening. And sometimes waiting has nothing to do
with me, not one single bit. God might be aligning
things in other people's lives before it's time for something
(13:53):
to happen in my own, so there's nothing to do
with me, has nothing to do with you, and I
I just wanted to remind you and myself that in
the waiting, God is still working, the season is not wasted,
And for me personally, I'm really trying to focus on
trusting that what's ahead is even better than what I
(14:16):
could dream up at this very moment. So if you're
in a season of waiting like me, and like the
listener that emailed, you're not alone. I'm just sharing with
you all some of the thoughts that I replied to
them and that I journaled through myself. Trust the process,
trust his timing, and know that even in the silence,
(14:37):
things are happening.
Speaker 1 (14:47):
All right.
Speaker 2 (14:47):
Have you heard of the ADHD paradox? I saw this
post on Instagram from an account. It's Molly's Underscore ADHD
Underscore Mayhem, and it really resonated me. She was talking
about how ADHD creates contradictions in our behavior and if
you have ADHD you'll probably find this very relatable.
Speaker 1 (15:06):
Here's what you put up the ADHD paradox.
Speaker 2 (15:08):
Feeling very confident versus feeling very self conscious. I want
to do everything versus I don't want to do anything.
I can't focus versus I can't stop focusing. I want
a routine versus it's impossible for me to stick to one.
I have so much energy versus I am completely burnt out. Now,
(15:33):
if you don't have ADHD, then you don't really know
what it's like to have your brain constantly pulling you
into opposite directions. And this gives an example of what
it can be like. And it's not that we don't care,
We're not trying. It's just that our brains operate on
a different rhythm. Like imagine driving a car with only
two speeds parks your full throttle like sometimes there is
(15:55):
just no in between, and that's often how ADHD can feel.
Speaker 1 (15:58):
It's all or nothing thing.
Speaker 2 (16:00):
And for me, what's helpful is I have to identify
which mode I'm in. Am I in my burnout mode
or I'm in my hyper focus I'm about to get
stuff done mode, And then I have to adjust my
expectations accordingly, because if I know that it's a low
energy day, I cannot force high energy tasks. And I
(16:21):
try to pay attention to my body because that's how
I'm going to survive, especially as I'm unmedicated. I also
use opposite strategies like if I can't focus, I'll go
move my body like I'll jump on my rebounder. If
I'm overstimulated, I will do a five minute meditation, because
(16:42):
sometimes you don't really have a choice in what you
need to get done. I do try to listen to
my body when I can, but there are times when
it's like, well, okay, I get that I can't focus
right now, but also I have a deadline for something,
so I have to use opposite strategies to come in
and help me out. So if you have ADHD, you're
(17:02):
not alone in this paradox. Instead of fighting it, we
have to really just learn how to recognize our patterns.
That's been very, very helpful for me in my unmedicated
season of life, which now it's officially been. I feel
like I started over Christmas break. I was thinking it
was that the new year, but it was a little
(17:24):
bit before the first of the year, so I'm probably
coming up on two months no meds and really implementing
some of these strategies, which if you want more exercises
and things you can do for yourself, if you go
to YouTube and put in brain gem exercises for ADHD,
a lot of things will come up that are helpful
(17:46):
for adults to do and kids.
Speaker 1 (17:48):
So if you have a child that has.
Speaker 2 (17:51):
ADHD, you can look up some of these exercises and
start doing them with them at home. They're just like
easy things, like if they're home from school, maybe they're
having a burnout day they can't focus, try some of
these exercises.
Speaker 1 (18:03):
Or if you'll both have.
Speaker 2 (18:04):
ADHD, then you get to do the exercises together as
a family. So I hope that that's helpful, because the
extremes can feel pretty crazy, can feel very very high
and then very very low at times, which can be
confusing and confusing for those around you if they don't
really understand the ADHD paradox. So I hope that this
(18:26):
is helpful for someone. I'm not an expert, but I'm
thankful for all the accounts that I follow and the
people in my life and my therapist and people that
have helped me as I navigate some of this. All right,
hope y'all are having the day that you need to have,
and I will see you on Saturday for Outweigh and
(18:47):
then on Tuesday for the fifth thing with Kat.
Speaker 1 (18:49):
Bye.
Hosts And Creators
Bobby Bones
Amy Brown
Lunchbox
Eddie Garcia
Morgan Huelsman
Raymundo
Mike D
Abby Anderson
Scuba Steve
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