May 20, 2024 • 30 mins
Friday (pt 2 of 2): On today’s Late Riser’s Podcast, Happy Friday - we’ll pay tribute to our long-time friend, Ward Burton and see if his skin is as thick as his accent!.. - Jackie insisted that we play John Boy’s “I Need A Vehicle” song.. - Today’s John Boy & Billy Playhouse features our Cajun heroes in a script entitled, “Boudreaux’s Dream”.. - With kids getting out of school soon, we’re bringing back our “Remote Control for Kids”.. - Plus we’ve got a new drug to help hen-pecked-husbands and we’ll finish up with the ultimate urban legend..
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:25):
Good morning.
Speaker 2 (00:25):
It's a big show on the radio. All right, us
out take our places here.
Speaker 1 (00:28):
We've got marthor raind.
Speaker 2 (00:29):
You got any lines in here?
Speaker 3 (00:33):
You have no lines?
Speaker 4 (00:34):
Okay, okay, good, I mean sorry, We'll maybe we work
here next time. I feels wrong quite on the set,
all right, Red Jackie.
Speaker 2 (00:43):
A quiet and actually.
Speaker 5 (00:47):
Welcome to John Boy and Billy Playhouse. Today's episode Boudreau's Dream.
As our story opens, Woodrow Boudreau and his friends Justin
LeBlanc are relaxing on the front poor after a delicious
evening supper.
Speaker 6 (01:02):
OOI that was show, some good supper. Listen, man, if
you wasn't over the history of the all boodoo here,
I'd been trying to got you to run off with me.
Speaker 7 (01:13):
I guarantee, well, thank you, verty good juice, din.
Speaker 2 (01:17):
Yep, little but no her way around the cooking stove.
Speaker 7 (01:19):
And good thing.
Speaker 8 (01:20):
I ain't know my way around and sink too, because
if a show, ain't none of you two gonna lift
a finger to help me with them?
Speaker 6 (01:25):
Do they dishes?
Speaker 4 (01:26):
I come in down just a minute and give you
a hand dollar.
Speaker 8 (01:29):
Well, I ain't about to staying round and held my
breath waiting on that to happen.
Speaker 9 (01:34):
She know you pretty good?
Speaker 2 (01:35):
Don't she sound like she know both of us pretty good?
Speaker 3 (01:38):
Ha?
Speaker 4 (01:39):
Hey, I had me a powerful dream last night that
I told you about it.
Speaker 3 (01:43):
I don't reckon you did well, let me tell you
about it.
Speaker 4 (01:46):
I sat under this grit big oak tree right beside
the most beautiful lake you ever seen, bright sunshine, nice shade,
just a hen of breeze that was perfect. And when
I look at over them water, I seen some gret
big catfish jumping up, splashing and saying, held damn, miss
bood Road. We sure with like and went home in
that fishing bucket you got side you. And when I
(02:07):
looked down in my hand, there sets the most beautiful
fishing pole.
Speaker 2 (02:11):
You ever did solve and just a quicker than fishing hook.
Speaker 3 (02:14):
Get the water.
Speaker 4 (02:15):
One of them catch a jump up latch on of
that hook, and I haul them up in that bucket.
Felt like I was laying down for a tree or
two hour, I guarantee on that woo.
Speaker 6 (02:24):
That sounds right good, but not as good as the
dream I done had last night.
Speaker 2 (02:29):
Oh yeah, well, now how you gonna beat that?
Speaker 3 (02:31):
Well?
Speaker 6 (02:32):
I dreamed I was laying in this nice king sized bed,
big ol' soft bed like the one that got over
at the best Western over there in Timmy. And there
was this big screen television with tree or two hundred channel,
and that twenty four hour room serving man was bringing
me everything I could take him to eat. And you
know who was laying that snuggle up next to me?
(02:52):
Who damn cute little identical twin waitresses from the waffle
house out on the bypass.
Speaker 3 (02:58):
Oh we you mean old Man and June. That's the ones. Ah?
Speaker 2 (03:01):
So how did they look like too?
Speaker 6 (03:03):
Shining angel set? Theirs all powdered up, smelling good and
wearing some of them Victorian secret clue, And all they
wanted to do was just pile up and make a
big old juice on sandwich.
Speaker 4 (03:17):
Ho ho, hold on now, man, what the same hell
kind of friend are you? Men that told me you
got two fine womans like that all by yourself, and
you didn't even taint to gave your pal Boodow a call.
Speaker 2 (03:29):
Well, hold on that I tried.
Speaker 6 (03:32):
Your wife said you was I fishing.
Speaker 5 (03:41):
We hope y'all don't enjoy the John Boyn Billy play House.
Speaker 6 (03:45):
And I hope you enjoyed your dream, because I enjoyed you.
Speaker 10 (03:48):
Then again next time we we'll hear the crusty old
knight manager at the waffle house out on the bipass say.
Speaker 2 (03:54):
Hey, big man, let me hold a dollar.
Speaker 4 (04:00):
They'll another pass bag for you lessen thirty minutes from
right now. It's a big sello letting somebody better dammit
than me, tell you than me?
Speaker 11 (04:12):
All right time by be the Big Show that stuff
picking him up at you.
Speaker 9 (04:17):
It's you, Marcel.
Speaker 11 (04:18):
What am I doing well When I'm not hanging up
on racing fat boy and trying to.
Speaker 2 (04:22):
Cure Babs of her terminal blondness.
Speaker 11 (04:25):
I'm listening to my two favorite straight white Southern boys,
John boyant Billie on the Big Show. Oh, Marcel, just stop, No,
I won't tell Randy you said hello.
Speaker 2 (05:04):
Good morning.
Speaker 4 (05:05):
Everybody got a big show on the radio coming up
on the easiest way for you to join. The winners
had to beat a current events QUI. As you take ce,
you will win the big old prize package we got
going up here and see what's happening around the world.
Well too, Helix High school students, we weed into a
plastic bag in a bottle during a bus trip. After
the teacher refused to unlock the bus bathroom or make
(05:26):
a stop. Parents have at least two of the La
Messa California students want choir director John Lynz Horse fired.
Nhorse said the decision to lock the bathroom was made
because several students were misbehaving fire director and making him
hold it guaranteed to come on to him.
Speaker 2 (05:42):
You fire director, you know the way, you know things
had to control and the choir is acting up on
the bus rip.
Speaker 10 (05:50):
And by the way, I think it used to be
La Mesa before they started peeing in a bag.
Speaker 12 (05:54):
Now it is.
Speaker 13 (05:56):
Well.
Speaker 4 (05:57):
A change in the Center Grove High School handbook for
next year will limit the types of dancing students can
do at the Greenwood, Indiana school. Among the new rules
so that both feet must remain on the floor, no
lifting legs above the waist, no pelvic thrusting resulting in
contact with another person in hands must be in appropriate places.
Speaker 9 (06:16):
We might as well just stay home.
Speaker 4 (06:19):
I guess the hokey pokey is out really trying to
prevent Let me see what else is happening around. Several
dozen models who pose nude for art students have formed
a union in an effort to get higher wages and
improve benefits. The Philadelphia Models Guild also wants a place
(06:39):
to change other than in the bathroom, a place to
hang street clothes, a screen for privacy in the classroom,
and cushion floor pass. Yeah, get their secret pretty much
out their post. They knew they need some privacy, want change.
I don't want to see me with my clothes on.
Where they can put the union label? Work that out.
(07:01):
But anyway, that's some of the news catching hourr today.
But hang on, we'll have a curn events quiz we'll
deal with and you can win off of it.
Speaker 2 (07:07):
Ten minutes.
Speaker 3 (07:12):
Then y'all ready for the current.
Speaker 4 (07:13):
Events quiz Takes see and win the aforementioned prize package.
Speaker 2 (07:17):
All right, current events, Billy, what we deal with today?
Speaker 10 (07:20):
Well, news out of New York City and it couldn't
have happened anywhere else. Eight million dollars worth of cocaine
discovered at the curb by a team of garbage men.
Speaker 2 (07:29):
Eight million dollars million dollars alright, one.
Speaker 4 (07:32):
Eight hundred, Big show your toe free line across America,
Big Calling nine, Take see and win right now, Good morning,
(07:57):
there's a big show on the radio.
Speaker 3 (07:58):
He you ready to care?
Speaker 2 (08:03):
Home quiz.
Speaker 12 (08:11):
Right.
Speaker 4 (08:12):
Our contestant is out of Biloxi, Mississippi.
Speaker 1 (08:15):
It's Dean.
Speaker 12 (08:17):
Hello, Dean, Hello, sir, how.
Speaker 13 (08:19):
You doing doing good?
Speaker 2 (08:19):
Buddy? All right this morning?
Speaker 10 (08:21):
Yes, sir, all right, I get her through, get.
Speaker 3 (08:24):
Her through.
Speaker 12 (08:26):
A day.
Speaker 2 (08:27):
Listen to Billie if you win this thing?
Speaker 1 (08:29):
Okay, well Deane.
Speaker 10 (08:30):
New York sanitation workers picked up a sofa on a
street corner in the Bronx, New York, last week, only
to discover it was stuffed with cocaine. Cops say the
stash had an estimated street value of eight million dollars.
The crews say they suspected there was something strange about
the sofa when they noticed A. The cushions were covered
(08:50):
with strange lumps. B white powder was leaking out of
the bottom or c. It was part of the sidewalk
sale at puff Daddy's Furniture.
Speaker 2 (08:59):
Hut.
Speaker 7 (09:01):
I think I'll take the three.
Speaker 10 (09:03):
Hey, yeah, and remember their prices are wow.
Speaker 2 (09:12):
All right they congratulations, buddy. Johnavilly passed away with raising
fried pag all right.
Speaker 14 (09:16):
Buddy, thank you sir.
Speaker 1 (09:25):
Good morning.
Speaker 2 (09:26):
You got the big shoe on the radio.
Speaker 4 (09:28):
More chances for you to win coming up after your.
Speaker 3 (09:30):
News weathers Mart yeah, this is your old pals.
Speaker 15 (09:33):
You stand La Black when I'm not mooching some of
that fine Jacques Danielle Whiskey and I played a right
fine gumbo off my best friend Woodrow Boodro and that
sassy sack of wife and his on Lizbeth. I'm listening
to those tool wacky Cajun John Boy and Philly right
there on that they're.
Speaker 14 (09:49):
Big Show wo Weekdays funny I Gary on Pete.
Speaker 2 (10:28):
Good morning, A big show is on the radio.
Speaker 4 (10:32):
Now, just talk right out and thinking what else? Don't?
Speaker 12 (10:34):
Yeah?
Speaker 9 (10:35):
Nothing?
Speaker 1 (10:36):
My lot said, hell go, what are you okay?
Speaker 2 (10:41):
Yeah yeah, I'm just thinking while I'm talking.
Speaker 1 (10:43):
How's that work?
Speaker 13 (10:45):
Kids?
Speaker 9 (10:45):
Yeah?
Speaker 1 (10:45):
Yeah, yeah, that's it.
Speaker 2 (10:46):
Uh yeah, a lot of kids out of school. That's
might come in handy.
Speaker 1 (10:51):
List enough.
Speaker 2 (10:52):
It's gonna be worth that, trust me.
Speaker 16 (10:54):
The remote control you can watch TV and never leave
your easy chair. But don't you wish you could control
your kids the same way?
Speaker 2 (11:03):
Now you can't. Mutual of Nebraska.
Speaker 16 (11:06):
The same people who brought you Tranquilizer darts for kids
now breaks you the remote control for kids. Check out
these features. Mommy, Mommy, up broad your antigues me? Why
fall you just hit that button.
Speaker 3 (11:26):
Yes, take your turn out, Please take your turn now.
Speaker 2 (11:29):
I want you to have your turn.
Speaker 7 (11:30):
I already had three thousand turns.
Speaker 16 (11:32):
Now horizontal, hal Can you do this out of this
in any want?
Speaker 2 (11:39):
Mute ugly kids, no problem.
Speaker 16 (11:42):
Just hit the channel changer and a new kid pops
up automatically. Mommy, we get the remote control for kids
and turn this.
Speaker 2 (11:53):
Into piss you.
Speaker 7 (11:55):
Is it wonderful?
Speaker 2 (11:56):
Birch, Good morning, a big show. It's on the radio. Yeah,
(12:25):
let me see.
Speaker 12 (12:29):
Man. Hello, Okay, it's heart all alive on the fider man,
No man, John boy, Billy, Uh, always say you beg old? Hey,
no driving nose picking knuckle dragon? He hal looking form
that much? Man?
Speaker 1 (12:44):
Was he with you?
Speaker 12 (12:45):
Put that down? Don't make me go outside your head
with the paper again.
Speaker 2 (12:49):
Who's that heart?
Speaker 1 (12:50):
Y'all?
Speaker 2 (12:50):
Got a new house guess?
Speaker 12 (12:52):
No, I usually hit a house guess with the ash track.
That's a different new dog, Junior, Ah, a new dog?
Huh yeah, I got it from the pound. The other day.
One of the coon dogs run off out of the pen.
Devil went down to Bailey Mountain. He fell in love
with this goofy looking little puppy over in the adoption pen.
You know, Debard, he's a sucker for a cute little dog.
Speaker 4 (13:13):
Yeah, we see some of his girlfriends. Now, what kind
of dog is it?
Speaker 12 (13:18):
Max breed? They said it's a half boat dog and
half shitsu. I ha'e tell you what they call it.
Speaker 2 (13:25):
So not exactly a hunting dog.
Speaker 12 (13:27):
Huh. No, he's one of them companionship breed. So far,
I believe he might be a little bit more than
half shit, Sue, if you know what I mean, you
might say that, Hey, he's speaking of seven and something men.
Debort hooked up with this boy named George Rogers, big
time parts distributor. We met through the body shop. He's
(13:49):
got him his private hunting camp in North Georgia. He
took us on a little long weekend down there. You
luck not a lit boy. Did have some pretty good
company on George. Pretty old boy. He's funny too. I
hold on a second. I got a piece of paper
in here. I wrote some stuff down. The other night
we was having us a beer or twelve. We got
the brainstorming roast some goodders. Now, oh here it is here.
(14:11):
It is all right what you got based on a
true story. The Top ten Things you'll never hear on
a Georgia hunting trip. Number ten. It wasn't the gun's fault.
I just miss Number nine. Let me show you why
I've seen that big block. Number eight on, Man, my
truck won't never get through that mud hole. Number seven?
(14:33):
What steaks again? Number six? Hey, let's ask Randy to
come with us next year. Number five, I sure miss
my wife. Number four? Where's the remote? Number three? I
think somebody needs a horse. Number two? Anybody wants the
(14:54):
rest of my croissant? And the number one thing you'll
never hear on a Georgia hunting trip. Oh lord, we'll
never drink all this beer.
Speaker 2 (15:03):
That's goods down heart.
Speaker 12 (15:05):
Yeah, and like I said, based on true story, Hey,
let's I got a run here, man, doctor Doolittle or
nothing is fixing to go to work. I gotta go
catch Junior and put him in the pan. Junior, get
off her?
Speaker 2 (15:16):
What's he doing?
Speaker 12 (15:17):
He's romance in that big old pillar we got land
in front of the TV, you know the one that
shaped like depends on car. Hey, y'all gonna see Google
later on?
Speaker 2 (15:28):
Probably will?
Speaker 12 (15:29):
Will you tell him? I got a dog setting job
for him this weekend? Oh and tell him, uh huh,
he'll know what you mean, y'all all keep him straight up.
Speaker 2 (15:36):
Our good morning, and you got the Big show on
the radio.
Speaker 4 (15:43):
More chances for you to win coming up after your
news weathers barts.
Speaker 13 (15:46):
I stand on the hill, but not for a thrill,
for the breath of a fresh kill. And never mind
the man who called him plates doing away with licensed
plates ends alone anyhow, Bacon the cookies of discontent by
the heat of the laundromat fact leaving their soul and
(16:11):
then like in portraygo dot dot dot, you know, kind
of host set up, leaving the soul parting the waters
of the Medulla. Oblong God with John Boy and Billy
on the Big Show like that one, John Boy, Ye.
Speaker 1 (17:03):
Good morning, every bought it.
Speaker 4 (17:04):
Big Show's on the radio, heading toward your last chance
and play and win today.
Speaker 1 (17:08):
I'd be stupid.
Speaker 4 (17:08):
Quiz I did well? Hang on stupid quiz is close. Hey,
I'm in I'm in here by myself. Nobody's in here.
I'm going to get into fortune, it's not.
Speaker 2 (17:23):
I was the only one in here, so I just
hid in my fork.
Speaker 14 (17:29):
I was just playing around.
Speaker 4 (17:30):
I'm getting up okay here.
Speaker 10 (17:33):
You know, most guys are asius bybly like you know,
a red convertible. But no, you're going a little bit
further back in childhood.
Speaker 3 (17:44):
Right, I'm starting all over.
Speaker 1 (17:45):
I'm gonna do it right this time.
Speaker 10 (17:47):
Fort's gonna bring back memories of the belt for you.
Speaker 2 (17:50):
No, Mama, don't make me go out there and cut
a swage and bring.
Speaker 9 (17:54):
It back to you.
Speaker 10 (17:56):
Yeah, go get us something to beat you.
Speaker 4 (17:59):
Uh, somebody might be able to beat me here in
a minute, be cause stupid quiz is coming up. All right,
hang on, it's your last n joined the Winters this morning.
Speaker 2 (18:28):
Good morning. It's a big show on the radio right now,
go ahead.
Speaker 9 (18:33):
Have you seen juniors grades.
Speaker 1 (18:38):
Some summertime? Come on?
Speaker 2 (18:41):
How you like racing? Take a couple of lamps? I
love you, I love you back.
Speaker 4 (18:53):
Teresa is out of Jared'stown, West Virginia. Good morning, Terresa.
How you doing baby?
Speaker 12 (18:59):
I'm alright?
Speaker 1 (18:59):
Hat you doing good? Doing good? All right?
Speaker 4 (19:01):
You got touched on phone? You touch a number for me,
that's the way you will chime in. I got the
beall all right.
Speaker 17 (19:07):
Let's start with math.
Speaker 2 (19:08):
Math.
Speaker 18 (19:11):
Spanky's head measures thirty seven and one eight inches around.
Bradshaw's is thirty four and seventh eighth inches around in feet?
Speaker 17 (19:22):
How big are both of their heads combined?
Speaker 2 (19:29):
Seventy two in feet?
Speaker 17 (19:31):
In feet?
Speaker 2 (19:32):
Oh oh that was inches?
Speaker 4 (19:36):
Uh yeah, go ahead, Race, I don't have a clue.
Speaker 2 (19:40):
That's right, such great six feet ahead? Well I put
them together almost as tall as I am.
Speaker 12 (19:46):
How about that?
Speaker 3 (19:50):
Yes?
Speaker 2 (19:52):
Science, science?
Speaker 18 (19:54):
How many vertebrae do humans have? Is it a seventeen
B twenty eight or C thirty three vertebrae?
Speaker 2 (20:03):
Vertebrae?
Speaker 3 (20:04):
Is that in the back?
Speaker 13 (20:06):
That's the trick here?
Speaker 3 (20:07):
You got?
Speaker 2 (20:08):
How many little spaces? Teresa?
Speaker 10 (20:11):
Seventeen?
Speaker 1 (20:12):
No?
Speaker 2 (20:13):
No, or what with the other two choices?
Speaker 17 (20:16):
Twenty eight, thirty three?
Speaker 2 (20:18):
Twenty eight sounds right?
Speaker 4 (20:19):
I'll go middle, twenty eight, No, thirty three vertebrae?
Speaker 10 (20:27):
Stupid?
Speaker 1 (20:28):
Okay?
Speaker 3 (20:28):
One and not?
Speaker 2 (20:29):
And Teresa still up on me.
Speaker 18 (20:30):
Let's go back to Spanky and Bradshaw maps. Okay, Spanky
and Bradshaw. We're skipping down the boardwalk looking for pennies.
They found seventeen. How many more do they need to
find to have three times that many?
Speaker 3 (20:46):
Three times that many?
Speaker 2 (20:49):
Teresa? Yeah, thirty four.
Speaker 18 (20:55):
That's right, Jesus, Spanky brushaw.
Speaker 2 (20:59):
Map uh tune and nothing trace ugh on me.
Speaker 1 (21:02):
I smell up just twod enough.
Speaker 17 (21:04):
You better go ahead and get that other Spanky breas.
Speaker 18 (21:06):
Let's just stay in Spanky.
Speaker 1 (21:09):
I'm enjoying it even if I do lose.
Speaker 18 (21:14):
Spanky finished reading Oprah's newest book in two and two
seventh weeks. Bradshaw finished it in six weeks in days.
How much longer did Bradshall take to finish.
Speaker 3 (21:27):
Man Spanky and Bradshaw Matthews hard.
Speaker 19 (21:32):
Yeah, three, no, thirty four, twenty six, twenty six.
Speaker 9 (21:46):
Oh that was my second guess.
Speaker 2 (21:48):
No, Racey still waiting two to nothing.
Speaker 17 (21:50):
All right, well, now we're gonna have to move on
to geography.
Speaker 2 (21:52):
Oh, let's go geography.
Speaker 17 (21:54):
Geography.
Speaker 1 (21:57):
Okay, here we.
Speaker 17 (21:57):
Go, alrighty geography.
Speaker 18 (22:00):
Jack did Julius Caesar rule the A Byzantine Byzantine Empire?
Speaker 17 (22:07):
B Roman Empire or c freaking Oh?
Speaker 3 (22:11):
Go ahead, Raman, Yes Roman, good work.
Speaker 2 (22:22):
Teresa, you're right all over today, baby.
Speaker 4 (22:25):
Thank you, thank you, Good morning.
Speaker 2 (22:29):
It's a big show on the radio.
Speaker 4 (22:30):
John Barbill Pillers, Randy, Jackie, Marcy Mars, Teter, touch a.
Speaker 2 (22:35):
Y'all, tell my classic midle of the morning this summery
through Friday.
Speaker 4 (22:37):
Got something you'd like to hear. You can email Jackie
the Big Show dot Com. Well, big one out of stack,
play it back next.
Speaker 2 (23:06):
Good morning, got a big show on the radio.
Speaker 13 (23:08):
You have.
Speaker 4 (23:08):
We love to hear from you all, long time Big
Show listeners eng.
Speaker 2 (23:12):
Email anybody but me or anybody at.
Speaker 4 (23:15):
The Bigshow dot Com for you're a plastic bit in
the morning.
Speaker 2 (23:18):
All right, now, time Tayler, take us way back for.
Speaker 7 (23:23):
And where do you think you're going?
Speaker 9 (23:25):
Well, it's my yearly fishing trip with the guys.
Speaker 8 (23:28):
Tell them you can't make it. You're planning azili as
at my mother's this weekend. Put your shoes on?
Speaker 9 (23:32):
Can I do it next weekend?
Speaker 7 (23:35):
I said, put your shoes on?
Speaker 9 (23:38):
But I now, Yes, dear, sound familiar. If so, You're
not alone. You're one of the millions of men across
America who just can't seem to stand up for themselves.
Speaker 7 (23:51):
You call this a bagcheck. I thought you were supposed
to be getting a raise.
Speaker 9 (23:55):
Well, you know they've been downsizing and I didn't want
to make waves.
Speaker 8 (23:58):
Tell me something. How do you manag to keep standing
like that with no spine?
Speaker 9 (24:02):
You're worthless, yes, dear, You're unable to muster even the
most modest amount of testicular fortitude and defend your dignity
like a man. And as a result, you're henpecked, browbeaten
and taken advantage of.
Speaker 8 (24:17):
Those two jackasses. Just cut in line in front of us.
We're already late for the movie. Aren't you going to
say anything?
Speaker 9 (24:24):
Keep your voice down, don't cause trouble, just let it go.
Speaker 7 (24:27):
You're a gutlass worm, do you know that?
Speaker 9 (24:30):
Yes, dear, You're not a pushover, You're not a coward.
You're suffering from dangerously low testosterone and it's ruining your life.
Other telltale signs include crying at TV commercials, the desire
to go shopping, and binge watching the view. And the
truth is, when you become the world's doormat, life simply
(24:52):
isn't worth living. But it doesn't have to be that way.
Introducing grow a Set. Grow a Set is an all natural,
proprietary blend of all natural ingredients that will supercharge your
testosterone levels, giving you back the confidence you need to
live life like a man again.
Speaker 7 (25:13):
Where are you going? You're supposed to be planning azelias
at my mother's You.
Speaker 9 (25:18):
Know, why doesn't she do it? She certainly needs the
exercise excuse me beginning of exercise. Maybe you should help
her tubby. Your days of being a timid wallflower are over.
The meek might inherit the earth, but you get everything
else with grow a Set.
Speaker 7 (25:34):
This raises ten times what you ask for. How this happened?
Speaker 9 (25:38):
I got a video of the boss and his secretary.
Speaker 7 (25:40):
That's blackmail.
Speaker 9 (25:42):
Yep. Grow a Set starts working with the first dose.
Just two capsules a day will keep your pants pumpkins
pumped up and you ready to meet your problems head on.
Speaker 7 (25:53):
Hey, those guys just cut in line ahead of us.
Speaker 9 (25:57):
I got this.
Speaker 12 (26:00):
Like that.
Speaker 1 (26:10):
All right?
Speaker 7 (26:11):
Oh my god. You could have just told him to believe.
Speaker 9 (26:14):
Yeah, that would have been fun. Go buy me popcorn. Yes, dear,
only take grow a Set under a doctor's supervision. Possible
side effects include alienation of friends, divorce, incarceration, bodily injury,
and confinement to a mental institution. But you'll do it
with attitude. Thanks to grow a Set.
Speaker 7 (26:33):
You're like a new man. You want to fool around.
Speaker 9 (26:36):
That's a great idea. I'll be back in a couple
of hours.
Speaker 2 (26:41):
Honey, life of all, make sure you have to with
grow A Set.
Speaker 20 (26:47):
Honey, good morning, A big show is on the radio.
Speaker 3 (27:18):
Let's bringing the old mail line.
Speaker 2 (27:21):
Oh we got letters.
Speaker 4 (27:22):
You get your letters every daybo.
Speaker 1 (27:29):
Me only.
Speaker 9 (27:32):
Letters.
Speaker 3 (27:33):
I love those letters.
Speaker 2 (27:36):
What you got to say?
Speaker 1 (27:38):
Oh boy? All right, yeah this was an email.
Speaker 4 (27:44):
Now, before y'all figure out how the world did I
get an email message?
Speaker 2 (27:46):
It was sent to me through the US Postals show.
Speaker 10 (27:49):
So somebody printed it out and then mailed it.
Speaker 2 (27:51):
Yeah, so I get it. I appreciate that you've got spam. Hey,
how they know?
Speaker 1 (27:57):
All right, listen to this boys.
Speaker 4 (27:58):
I know this guy whose neighbor young man was home
recovering from having been served a rat in his bucket
a Kentucky Fried chicken. So anyway, one day he went
to sleep and when he awoke, he was in his
bath ub and it was full of ice and he
was sore all over. When he got out of the tub,
he realized that his kidneys had been stolen. And he
saw a note on his mirror that said call nine
to one one. But he was afraid to use his
phone because he was connected to his computer and there
was a virus on his computer that would destroy his
(28:20):
hard drive if he opened an email entitled joined the Crew. Well,
he knew it was in a hoax, because he himself
was a computer programmer who was working on software the
saver us from Armageddon. When the year two thousand rolls around.
His program will prevent a global disaster in which all
computers get together and distribute these six hundred dollars Nieman
Marcus cookie recipe under the leadership of Bill Gates. It's true.
I read it all last week in a mass email
(28:42):
from Bill Gates himself, who was also promising me a
free Disney World vacation and five thousand dollars if I
would ford the email to everyone I know well. The
poor man then tried to call nine one one from
a payphone to reporter's missing kidneys, but reaching into the
coin return slot, he got jabbed with an HIV infected needle,
around which was wrapped a note that said welcome to
the world of age.
Speaker 2 (29:01):
Luckily he was only.
Speaker 4 (29:02):
A few blocks from the hospital, the one actually where
that little boy who's dying of cancer is the one
whose last wishes for everybody in the world to send
him an email. In American Cancer Society has agreed to
pay him a nickel for ever email he receives. I
sent him two emails and One of them was a
bunch of ex'es and o's in the shape of an angel.
If you get it and forward it to twenty people,
you'll have good luck. Four to ten people you will
only have okay. Look, and if you send it to
less than ten people, you'll have bad luck for seven years.
(29:23):
So anyway, the poor guy tried to drive himself to
the hospital. Doing the way, he noticed another car driving
along without his lights on. To be healthy, he flashes
lights at him was promptly shot as part of a
gang initiation. He was found by the side of the
road with toothbrush sticking out his bus.
Speaker 12 (29:40):
Is that true?
Speaker 2 (29:41):
No, don't be silly.
Speaker 10 (29:43):
The email message that destroys your computer is called win
a holiday.
Speaker 4 (29:47):
Yeah something right about, Get up prett tierly in the morning,
Pull one over one.
Speaker 1 (30:01):
I'm alling in it.
Speaker 10 (30:03):
Big Box this year all your favorites from four decades
at the Big Show ninety nine since each fifteen for
nine ninety nine. Buy them once, play them anywhere. Shop
the Big Box online at the Big Show dot Com.
Speaker 2 (30:13):
Order Big Show Stuff by phone.
Speaker 10 (30:14):
The number is eight hundred and four seven one Stuff
Online Services by Hannimink dot Com.
Speaker 4 (30:19):
A y'all hope you have a great rest of your Friday.
Little kick the weekend on with a Saturday Big Show
on tomorrow. Next up John one million, Late Risinges podcast
at the Big Show dot com or free I Heart
Radio way love you man it
Good morning.
Speaker 2 (00:25):
It's a big show on the radio. All right, us
out take our places here.
Speaker 1 (00:28):
We've got marthor raind.
Speaker 2 (00:29):
You got any lines in here?
Speaker 3 (00:33):
You have no lines?
Speaker 4 (00:34):
Okay, okay, good, I mean sorry, We'll maybe we work
here next time. I feels wrong quite on the set,
all right, Red Jackie.
Speaker 2 (00:43):
A quiet and actually.
Speaker 5 (00:47):
Welcome to John Boy and Billy Playhouse. Today's episode Boudreau's Dream.
As our story opens, Woodrow Boudreau and his friends Justin
LeBlanc are relaxing on the front poor after a delicious
evening supper.
Speaker 6 (01:02):
OOI that was show, some good supper. Listen, man, if
you wasn't over the history of the all boodoo here,
I'd been trying to got you to run off with me.
Speaker 7 (01:13):
I guarantee, well, thank you, verty good juice, din.
Speaker 2 (01:17):
Yep, little but no her way around the cooking stove.
Speaker 7 (01:19):
And good thing.
Speaker 8 (01:20):
I ain't know my way around and sink too, because
if a show, ain't none of you two gonna lift
a finger to help me with them?
Speaker 6 (01:25):
Do they dishes?
Speaker 4 (01:26):
I come in down just a minute and give you
a hand dollar.
Speaker 8 (01:29):
Well, I ain't about to staying round and held my
breath waiting on that to happen.
Speaker 9 (01:34):
She know you pretty good?
Speaker 2 (01:35):
Don't she sound like she know both of us pretty good?
Speaker 3 (01:38):
Ha?
Speaker 4 (01:39):
Hey, I had me a powerful dream last night that
I told you about it.
Speaker 3 (01:43):
I don't reckon you did well, let me tell you
about it.
Speaker 4 (01:46):
I sat under this grit big oak tree right beside
the most beautiful lake you ever seen, bright sunshine, nice shade,
just a hen of breeze that was perfect. And when
I look at over them water, I seen some gret
big catfish jumping up, splashing and saying, held damn, miss
bood Road. We sure with like and went home in
that fishing bucket you got side you. And when I
(02:07):
looked down in my hand, there sets the most beautiful
fishing pole.
Speaker 2 (02:11):
You ever did solve and just a quicker than fishing hook.
Speaker 3 (02:14):
Get the water.
Speaker 4 (02:15):
One of them catch a jump up latch on of
that hook, and I haul them up in that bucket.
Felt like I was laying down for a tree or
two hour, I guarantee on that woo.
Speaker 6 (02:24):
That sounds right good, but not as good as the
dream I done had last night.
Speaker 2 (02:29):
Oh yeah, well, now how you gonna beat that?
Speaker 3 (02:31):
Well?
Speaker 6 (02:32):
I dreamed I was laying in this nice king sized bed,
big ol' soft bed like the one that got over
at the best Western over there in Timmy. And there
was this big screen television with tree or two hundred channel,
and that twenty four hour room serving man was bringing
me everything I could take him to eat. And you
know who was laying that snuggle up next to me?
(02:52):
Who damn cute little identical twin waitresses from the waffle
house out on the bypass.
Speaker 3 (02:58):
Oh we you mean old Man and June. That's the ones. Ah?
Speaker 2 (03:01):
So how did they look like too?
Speaker 6 (03:03):
Shining angel set? Theirs all powdered up, smelling good and
wearing some of them Victorian secret clue, And all they
wanted to do was just pile up and make a
big old juice on sandwich.
Speaker 4 (03:17):
Ho ho, hold on now, man, what the same hell
kind of friend are you? Men that told me you
got two fine womans like that all by yourself, and
you didn't even taint to gave your pal Boodow a call.
Speaker 2 (03:29):
Well, hold on that I tried.
Speaker 6 (03:32):
Your wife said you was I fishing.
Speaker 5 (03:41):
We hope y'all don't enjoy the John Boyn Billy play House.
Speaker 6 (03:45):
And I hope you enjoyed your dream, because I enjoyed you.
Speaker 10 (03:48):
Then again next time we we'll hear the crusty old
knight manager at the waffle house out on the bipass say.
Speaker 2 (03:54):
Hey, big man, let me hold a dollar.
Speaker 4 (04:00):
They'll another pass bag for you lessen thirty minutes from
right now. It's a big sello letting somebody better dammit
than me, tell you than me?
Speaker 11 (04:12):
All right time by be the Big Show that stuff
picking him up at you.
Speaker 9 (04:17):
It's you, Marcel.
Speaker 11 (04:18):
What am I doing well When I'm not hanging up
on racing fat boy and trying to.
Speaker 2 (04:22):
Cure Babs of her terminal blondness.
Speaker 11 (04:25):
I'm listening to my two favorite straight white Southern boys,
John boyant Billie on the Big Show. Oh, Marcel, just stop, No,
I won't tell Randy you said hello.
Speaker 2 (05:04):
Good morning.
Speaker 4 (05:05):
Everybody got a big show on the radio coming up
on the easiest way for you to join. The winners
had to beat a current events QUI. As you take ce,
you will win the big old prize package we got
going up here and see what's happening around the world.
Well too, Helix High school students, we weed into a
plastic bag in a bottle during a bus trip. After
the teacher refused to unlock the bus bathroom or make
(05:26):
a stop. Parents have at least two of the La
Messa California students want choir director John Lynz Horse fired.
Nhorse said the decision to lock the bathroom was made
because several students were misbehaving fire director and making him
hold it guaranteed to come on to him.
Speaker 2 (05:42):
You fire director, you know the way, you know things
had to control and the choir is acting up on
the bus rip.
Speaker 10 (05:50):
And by the way, I think it used to be
La Mesa before they started peeing in a bag.
Speaker 12 (05:54):
Now it is.
Speaker 13 (05:56):
Well.
Speaker 4 (05:57):
A change in the Center Grove High School handbook for
next year will limit the types of dancing students can
do at the Greenwood, Indiana school. Among the new rules
so that both feet must remain on the floor, no
lifting legs above the waist, no pelvic thrusting resulting in
contact with another person in hands must be in appropriate places.
Speaker 9 (06:16):
We might as well just stay home.
Speaker 4 (06:19):
I guess the hokey pokey is out really trying to
prevent Let me see what else is happening around. Several
dozen models who pose nude for art students have formed
a union in an effort to get higher wages and
improve benefits. The Philadelphia Models Guild also wants a place
(06:39):
to change other than in the bathroom, a place to
hang street clothes, a screen for privacy in the classroom,
and cushion floor pass. Yeah, get their secret pretty much
out their post. They knew they need some privacy, want change.
I don't want to see me with my clothes on.
Where they can put the union label? Work that out.
(07:01):
But anyway, that's some of the news catching hourr today.
But hang on, we'll have a curn events quiz we'll
deal with and you can win off of it.
Speaker 2 (07:07):
Ten minutes.
Speaker 3 (07:12):
Then y'all ready for the current.
Speaker 4 (07:13):
Events quiz Takes see and win the aforementioned prize package.
Speaker 2 (07:17):
All right, current events, Billy, what we deal with today?
Speaker 10 (07:20):
Well, news out of New York City and it couldn't
have happened anywhere else. Eight million dollars worth of cocaine
discovered at the curb by a team of garbage men.
Speaker 2 (07:29):
Eight million dollars million dollars alright, one.
Speaker 4 (07:32):
Eight hundred, Big show your toe free line across America,
Big Calling nine, Take see and win right now, Good morning,
(07:57):
there's a big show on the radio.
Speaker 3 (07:58):
He you ready to care?
Speaker 2 (08:03):
Home quiz.
Speaker 12 (08:11):
Right.
Speaker 4 (08:12):
Our contestant is out of Biloxi, Mississippi.
Speaker 1 (08:15):
It's Dean.
Speaker 12 (08:17):
Hello, Dean, Hello, sir, how.
Speaker 13 (08:19):
You doing doing good?
Speaker 2 (08:19):
Buddy? All right this morning?
Speaker 10 (08:21):
Yes, sir, all right, I get her through, get.
Speaker 3 (08:24):
Her through.
Speaker 12 (08:26):
A day.
Speaker 2 (08:27):
Listen to Billie if you win this thing?
Speaker 1 (08:29):
Okay, well Deane.
Speaker 10 (08:30):
New York sanitation workers picked up a sofa on a
street corner in the Bronx, New York, last week, only
to discover it was stuffed with cocaine. Cops say the
stash had an estimated street value of eight million dollars.
The crews say they suspected there was something strange about
the sofa when they noticed A. The cushions were covered
(08:50):
with strange lumps. B white powder was leaking out of
the bottom or c. It was part of the sidewalk
sale at puff Daddy's Furniture.
Speaker 2 (08:59):
Hut.
Speaker 7 (09:01):
I think I'll take the three.
Speaker 10 (09:03):
Hey, yeah, and remember their prices are wow.
Speaker 2 (09:12):
All right they congratulations, buddy. Johnavilly passed away with raising
fried pag all right.
Speaker 14 (09:16):
Buddy, thank you sir.
Speaker 1 (09:25):
Good morning.
Speaker 2 (09:26):
You got the big shoe on the radio.
Speaker 4 (09:28):
More chances for you to win coming up after your.
Speaker 3 (09:30):
News weathers Mart yeah, this is your old pals.
Speaker 15 (09:33):
You stand La Black when I'm not mooching some of
that fine Jacques Danielle Whiskey and I played a right
fine gumbo off my best friend Woodrow Boodro and that
sassy sack of wife and his on Lizbeth. I'm listening
to those tool wacky Cajun John Boy and Philly right
there on that they're.
Speaker 14 (09:49):
Big Show wo Weekdays funny I Gary on Pete.
Speaker 2 (10:28):
Good morning, A big show is on the radio.
Speaker 4 (10:32):
Now, just talk right out and thinking what else? Don't?
Speaker 12 (10:34):
Yeah?
Speaker 9 (10:35):
Nothing?
Speaker 1 (10:36):
My lot said, hell go, what are you okay?
Speaker 2 (10:41):
Yeah yeah, I'm just thinking while I'm talking.
Speaker 1 (10:43):
How's that work?
Speaker 13 (10:45):
Kids?
Speaker 9 (10:45):
Yeah?
Speaker 1 (10:45):
Yeah, yeah, that's it.
Speaker 2 (10:46):
Uh yeah, a lot of kids out of school. That's
might come in handy.
Speaker 1 (10:51):
List enough.
Speaker 2 (10:52):
It's gonna be worth that, trust me.
Speaker 16 (10:54):
The remote control you can watch TV and never leave
your easy chair. But don't you wish you could control
your kids the same way?
Speaker 2 (11:03):
Now you can't. Mutual of Nebraska.
Speaker 16 (11:06):
The same people who brought you Tranquilizer darts for kids
now breaks you the remote control for kids. Check out
these features. Mommy, Mommy, up broad your antigues me? Why
fall you just hit that button.
Speaker 3 (11:26):
Yes, take your turn out, Please take your turn now.
Speaker 2 (11:29):
I want you to have your turn.
Speaker 7 (11:30):
I already had three thousand turns.
Speaker 16 (11:32):
Now horizontal, hal Can you do this out of this
in any want?
Speaker 2 (11:39):
Mute ugly kids, no problem.
Speaker 16 (11:42):
Just hit the channel changer and a new kid pops
up automatically. Mommy, we get the remote control for kids
and turn this.
Speaker 2 (11:53):
Into piss you.
Speaker 7 (11:55):
Is it wonderful?
Speaker 2 (11:56):
Birch, Good morning, a big show. It's on the radio. Yeah,
(12:25):
let me see.
Speaker 12 (12:29):
Man. Hello, Okay, it's heart all alive on the fider man,
No man, John boy, Billy, Uh, always say you beg old? Hey,
no driving nose picking knuckle dragon? He hal looking form
that much? Man?
Speaker 1 (12:44):
Was he with you?
Speaker 12 (12:45):
Put that down? Don't make me go outside your head
with the paper again.
Speaker 2 (12:49):
Who's that heart?
Speaker 1 (12:50):
Y'all?
Speaker 2 (12:50):
Got a new house guess?
Speaker 12 (12:52):
No, I usually hit a house guess with the ash track.
That's a different new dog, Junior, Ah, a new dog?
Huh yeah, I got it from the pound. The other day.
One of the coon dogs run off out of the pen.
Devil went down to Bailey Mountain. He fell in love
with this goofy looking little puppy over in the adoption pen.
You know, Debard, he's a sucker for a cute little dog.
Speaker 4 (13:13):
Yeah, we see some of his girlfriends. Now, what kind
of dog is it?
Speaker 12 (13:18):
Max breed? They said it's a half boat dog and
half shitsu. I ha'e tell you what they call it.
Speaker 2 (13:25):
So not exactly a hunting dog.
Speaker 12 (13:27):
Huh. No, he's one of them companionship breed. So far,
I believe he might be a little bit more than
half shit, Sue, if you know what I mean, you
might say that, Hey, he's speaking of seven and something men.
Debort hooked up with this boy named George Rogers, big
time parts distributor. We met through the body shop. He's
(13:49):
got him his private hunting camp in North Georgia. He
took us on a little long weekend down there. You
luck not a lit boy. Did have some pretty good
company on George. Pretty old boy. He's funny too. I
hold on a second. I got a piece of paper
in here. I wrote some stuff down. The other night
we was having us a beer or twelve. We got
the brainstorming roast some goodders. Now, oh here it is here.
(14:11):
It is all right what you got based on a
true story. The Top ten Things you'll never hear on
a Georgia hunting trip. Number ten. It wasn't the gun's fault.
I just miss Number nine. Let me show you why
I've seen that big block. Number eight on, Man, my
truck won't never get through that mud hole. Number seven?
(14:33):
What steaks again? Number six? Hey, let's ask Randy to
come with us next year. Number five, I sure miss
my wife. Number four? Where's the remote? Number three? I
think somebody needs a horse. Number two? Anybody wants the
(14:54):
rest of my croissant? And the number one thing you'll
never hear on a Georgia hunting trip. Oh lord, we'll
never drink all this beer.
Speaker 2 (15:03):
That's goods down heart.
Speaker 12 (15:05):
Yeah, and like I said, based on true story, Hey,
let's I got a run here, man, doctor Doolittle or
nothing is fixing to go to work. I gotta go
catch Junior and put him in the pan. Junior, get
off her?
Speaker 2 (15:16):
What's he doing?
Speaker 12 (15:17):
He's romance in that big old pillar we got land
in front of the TV, you know the one that
shaped like depends on car. Hey, y'all gonna see Google
later on?
Speaker 2 (15:28):
Probably will?
Speaker 12 (15:29):
Will you tell him? I got a dog setting job
for him this weekend? Oh and tell him, uh huh,
he'll know what you mean, y'all all keep him straight up.
Speaker 2 (15:36):
Our good morning, and you got the Big show on
the radio.
Speaker 4 (15:43):
More chances for you to win coming up after your
news weathers barts.
Speaker 13 (15:46):
I stand on the hill, but not for a thrill,
for the breath of a fresh kill. And never mind
the man who called him plates doing away with licensed
plates ends alone anyhow, Bacon the cookies of discontent by
the heat of the laundromat fact leaving their soul and
(16:11):
then like in portraygo dot dot dot, you know, kind
of host set up, leaving the soul parting the waters
of the Medulla. Oblong God with John Boy and Billy
on the Big Show like that one, John Boy, Ye.
Speaker 1 (17:03):
Good morning, every bought it.
Speaker 4 (17:04):
Big Show's on the radio, heading toward your last chance
and play and win today.
Speaker 1 (17:08):
I'd be stupid.
Speaker 4 (17:08):
Quiz I did well? Hang on stupid quiz is close. Hey,
I'm in I'm in here by myself. Nobody's in here.
I'm going to get into fortune, it's not.
Speaker 2 (17:23):
I was the only one in here, so I just
hid in my fork.
Speaker 14 (17:29):
I was just playing around.
Speaker 4 (17:30):
I'm getting up okay here.
Speaker 10 (17:33):
You know, most guys are asius bybly like you know,
a red convertible. But no, you're going a little bit
further back in childhood.
Speaker 3 (17:44):
Right, I'm starting all over.
Speaker 1 (17:45):
I'm gonna do it right this time.
Speaker 10 (17:47):
Fort's gonna bring back memories of the belt for you.
Speaker 2 (17:50):
No, Mama, don't make me go out there and cut
a swage and bring.
Speaker 9 (17:54):
It back to you.
Speaker 10 (17:56):
Yeah, go get us something to beat you.
Speaker 4 (17:59):
Uh, somebody might be able to beat me here in
a minute, be cause stupid quiz is coming up. All right,
hang on, it's your last n joined the Winters this morning.
Speaker 2 (18:28):
Good morning. It's a big show on the radio right now,
go ahead.
Speaker 9 (18:33):
Have you seen juniors grades.
Speaker 1 (18:38):
Some summertime? Come on?
Speaker 2 (18:41):
How you like racing? Take a couple of lamps? I
love you, I love you back.
Speaker 4 (18:53):
Teresa is out of Jared'stown, West Virginia. Good morning, Terresa.
How you doing baby?
Speaker 12 (18:59):
I'm alright?
Speaker 1 (18:59):
Hat you doing good? Doing good? All right?
Speaker 4 (19:01):
You got touched on phone? You touch a number for me,
that's the way you will chime in. I got the
beall all right.
Speaker 17 (19:07):
Let's start with math.
Speaker 2 (19:08):
Math.
Speaker 18 (19:11):
Spanky's head measures thirty seven and one eight inches around.
Bradshaw's is thirty four and seventh eighth inches around in feet?
Speaker 17 (19:22):
How big are both of their heads combined?
Speaker 2 (19:29):
Seventy two in feet?
Speaker 17 (19:31):
In feet?
Speaker 2 (19:32):
Oh oh that was inches?
Speaker 4 (19:36):
Uh yeah, go ahead, Race, I don't have a clue.
Speaker 2 (19:40):
That's right, such great six feet ahead? Well I put
them together almost as tall as I am.
Speaker 12 (19:46):
How about that?
Speaker 3 (19:50):
Yes?
Speaker 2 (19:52):
Science, science?
Speaker 18 (19:54):
How many vertebrae do humans have? Is it a seventeen
B twenty eight or C thirty three vertebrae?
Speaker 2 (20:03):
Vertebrae?
Speaker 3 (20:04):
Is that in the back?
Speaker 13 (20:06):
That's the trick here?
Speaker 3 (20:07):
You got?
Speaker 2 (20:08):
How many little spaces? Teresa?
Speaker 10 (20:11):
Seventeen?
Speaker 1 (20:12):
No?
Speaker 2 (20:13):
No, or what with the other two choices?
Speaker 17 (20:16):
Twenty eight, thirty three?
Speaker 2 (20:18):
Twenty eight sounds right?
Speaker 4 (20:19):
I'll go middle, twenty eight, No, thirty three vertebrae?
Speaker 10 (20:27):
Stupid?
Speaker 1 (20:28):
Okay?
Speaker 3 (20:28):
One and not?
Speaker 2 (20:29):
And Teresa still up on me.
Speaker 18 (20:30):
Let's go back to Spanky and Bradshaw maps. Okay, Spanky
and Bradshaw. We're skipping down the boardwalk looking for pennies.
They found seventeen. How many more do they need to
find to have three times that many?
Speaker 3 (20:46):
Three times that many?
Speaker 2 (20:49):
Teresa? Yeah, thirty four.
Speaker 18 (20:55):
That's right, Jesus, Spanky brushaw.
Speaker 2 (20:59):
Map uh tune and nothing trace ugh on me.
Speaker 1 (21:02):
I smell up just twod enough.
Speaker 17 (21:04):
You better go ahead and get that other Spanky breas.
Speaker 18 (21:06):
Let's just stay in Spanky.
Speaker 1 (21:09):
I'm enjoying it even if I do lose.
Speaker 18 (21:14):
Spanky finished reading Oprah's newest book in two and two
seventh weeks. Bradshaw finished it in six weeks in days.
How much longer did Bradshall take to finish.
Speaker 3 (21:27):
Man Spanky and Bradshaw Matthews hard.
Speaker 19 (21:32):
Yeah, three, no, thirty four, twenty six, twenty six.
Speaker 9 (21:46):
Oh that was my second guess.
Speaker 2 (21:48):
No, Racey still waiting two to nothing.
Speaker 17 (21:50):
All right, well, now we're gonna have to move on
to geography.
Speaker 2 (21:52):
Oh, let's go geography.
Speaker 17 (21:54):
Geography.
Speaker 1 (21:57):
Okay, here we.
Speaker 17 (21:57):
Go, alrighty geography.
Speaker 18 (22:00):
Jack did Julius Caesar rule the A Byzantine Byzantine Empire?
Speaker 17 (22:07):
B Roman Empire or c freaking Oh?
Speaker 3 (22:11):
Go ahead, Raman, Yes Roman, good work.
Speaker 2 (22:22):
Teresa, you're right all over today, baby.
Speaker 4 (22:25):
Thank you, thank you, Good morning.
Speaker 2 (22:29):
It's a big show on the radio.
Speaker 4 (22:30):
John Barbill Pillers, Randy, Jackie, Marcy Mars, Teter, touch a.
Speaker 2 (22:35):
Y'all, tell my classic midle of the morning this summery
through Friday.
Speaker 4 (22:37):
Got something you'd like to hear. You can email Jackie
the Big Show dot Com. Well, big one out of stack,
play it back next.
Speaker 2 (23:06):
Good morning, got a big show on the radio.
Speaker 13 (23:08):
You have.
Speaker 4 (23:08):
We love to hear from you all, long time Big
Show listeners eng.
Speaker 2 (23:12):
Email anybody but me or anybody at.
Speaker 4 (23:15):
The Bigshow dot Com for you're a plastic bit in
the morning.
Speaker 2 (23:18):
All right, now, time Tayler, take us way back for.
Speaker 7 (23:23):
And where do you think you're going?
Speaker 9 (23:25):
Well, it's my yearly fishing trip with the guys.
Speaker 8 (23:28):
Tell them you can't make it. You're planning azili as
at my mother's this weekend. Put your shoes on?
Speaker 9 (23:32):
Can I do it next weekend?
Speaker 7 (23:35):
I said, put your shoes on?
Speaker 9 (23:38):
But I now, Yes, dear, sound familiar. If so, You're
not alone. You're one of the millions of men across
America who just can't seem to stand up for themselves.
Speaker 7 (23:51):
You call this a bagcheck. I thought you were supposed
to be getting a raise.
Speaker 9 (23:55):
Well, you know they've been downsizing and I didn't want
to make waves.
Speaker 8 (23:58):
Tell me something. How do you manag to keep standing
like that with no spine?
Speaker 9 (24:02):
You're worthless, yes, dear, You're unable to muster even the
most modest amount of testicular fortitude and defend your dignity
like a man. And as a result, you're henpecked, browbeaten
and taken advantage of.
Speaker 8 (24:17):
Those two jackasses. Just cut in line in front of us.
We're already late for the movie. Aren't you going to
say anything?
Speaker 9 (24:24):
Keep your voice down, don't cause trouble, just let it go.
Speaker 7 (24:27):
You're a gutlass worm, do you know that?
Speaker 9 (24:30):
Yes, dear, You're not a pushover, You're not a coward.
You're suffering from dangerously low testosterone and it's ruining your life.
Other telltale signs include crying at TV commercials, the desire
to go shopping, and binge watching the view. And the
truth is, when you become the world's doormat, life simply
(24:52):
isn't worth living. But it doesn't have to be that way.
Introducing grow a Set. Grow a Set is an all natural,
proprietary blend of all natural ingredients that will supercharge your
testosterone levels, giving you back the confidence you need to
live life like a man again.
Speaker 7 (25:13):
Where are you going? You're supposed to be planning azelias
at my mother's You.
Speaker 9 (25:18):
Know, why doesn't she do it? She certainly needs the
exercise excuse me beginning of exercise. Maybe you should help
her tubby. Your days of being a timid wallflower are over.
The meek might inherit the earth, but you get everything
else with grow a Set.
Speaker 7 (25:34):
This raises ten times what you ask for. How this happened?
Speaker 9 (25:38):
I got a video of the boss and his secretary.
Speaker 7 (25:40):
That's blackmail.
Speaker 9 (25:42):
Yep. Grow a Set starts working with the first dose.
Just two capsules a day will keep your pants pumpkins
pumped up and you ready to meet your problems head on.
Speaker 7 (25:53):
Hey, those guys just cut in line ahead of us.
Speaker 9 (25:57):
I got this.
Speaker 12 (26:00):
Like that.
Speaker 1 (26:10):
All right?
Speaker 7 (26:11):
Oh my god. You could have just told him to believe.
Speaker 9 (26:14):
Yeah, that would have been fun. Go buy me popcorn. Yes, dear,
only take grow a Set under a doctor's supervision. Possible
side effects include alienation of friends, divorce, incarceration, bodily injury,
and confinement to a mental institution. But you'll do it
with attitude. Thanks to grow a Set.
Speaker 7 (26:33):
You're like a new man. You want to fool around.
Speaker 9 (26:36):
That's a great idea. I'll be back in a couple
of hours.
Speaker 2 (26:41):
Honey, life of all, make sure you have to with
grow A Set.
Speaker 20 (26:47):
Honey, good morning, A big show is on the radio.
Speaker 3 (27:18):
Let's bringing the old mail line.
Speaker 2 (27:21):
Oh we got letters.
Speaker 4 (27:22):
You get your letters every daybo.
Speaker 1 (27:29):
Me only.
Speaker 9 (27:32):
Letters.
Speaker 3 (27:33):
I love those letters.
Speaker 2 (27:36):
What you got to say?
Speaker 1 (27:38):
Oh boy? All right, yeah this was an email.
Speaker 4 (27:44):
Now, before y'all figure out how the world did I
get an email message?
Speaker 2 (27:46):
It was sent to me through the US Postals show.
Speaker 10 (27:49):
So somebody printed it out and then mailed it.
Speaker 2 (27:51):
Yeah, so I get it. I appreciate that you've got spam. Hey,
how they know?
Speaker 1 (27:57):
All right, listen to this boys.
Speaker 4 (27:58):
I know this guy whose neighbor young man was home
recovering from having been served a rat in his bucket
a Kentucky Fried chicken. So anyway, one day he went
to sleep and when he awoke, he was in his
bath ub and it was full of ice and he
was sore all over. When he got out of the tub,
he realized that his kidneys had been stolen. And he
saw a note on his mirror that said call nine
to one one. But he was afraid to use his
phone because he was connected to his computer and there
was a virus on his computer that would destroy his
(28:20):
hard drive if he opened an email entitled joined the Crew. Well,
he knew it was in a hoax, because he himself
was a computer programmer who was working on software the
saver us from Armageddon. When the year two thousand rolls around.
His program will prevent a global disaster in which all
computers get together and distribute these six hundred dollars Nieman
Marcus cookie recipe under the leadership of Bill Gates. It's true.
I read it all last week in a mass email
(28:42):
from Bill Gates himself, who was also promising me a
free Disney World vacation and five thousand dollars if I
would ford the email to everyone I know well. The
poor man then tried to call nine one one from
a payphone to reporter's missing kidneys, but reaching into the
coin return slot, he got jabbed with an HIV infected needle,
around which was wrapped a note that said welcome to
the world of age.
Speaker 2 (29:01):
Luckily he was only.
Speaker 4 (29:02):
A few blocks from the hospital, the one actually where
that little boy who's dying of cancer is the one
whose last wishes for everybody in the world to send
him an email. In American Cancer Society has agreed to
pay him a nickel for ever email he receives. I
sent him two emails and One of them was a
bunch of ex'es and o's in the shape of an angel.
If you get it and forward it to twenty people,
you'll have good luck. Four to ten people you will
only have okay. Look, and if you send it to
less than ten people, you'll have bad luck for seven years.
(29:23):
So anyway, the poor guy tried to drive himself to
the hospital. Doing the way, he noticed another car driving
along without his lights on. To be healthy, he flashes
lights at him was promptly shot as part of a
gang initiation. He was found by the side of the
road with toothbrush sticking out his bus.
Speaker 12 (29:40):
Is that true?
Speaker 2 (29:41):
No, don't be silly.
Speaker 10 (29:43):
The email message that destroys your computer is called win
a holiday.
Speaker 4 (29:47):
Yeah something right about, Get up prett tierly in the morning,
Pull one over one.
Speaker 1 (30:01):
I'm alling in it.
Speaker 10 (30:03):
Big Box this year all your favorites from four decades
at the Big Show ninety nine since each fifteen for
nine ninety nine. Buy them once, play them anywhere. Shop
the Big Box online at the Big Show dot Com.
Speaker 2 (30:13):
Order Big Show Stuff by phone.
Speaker 10 (30:14):
The number is eight hundred and four seven one Stuff
Online Services by Hannimink dot Com.
Speaker 4 (30:19):
A y'all hope you have a great rest of your Friday.
Little kick the weekend on with a Saturday Big Show
on tomorrow. Next up John one million, Late Risinges podcast
at the Big Show dot com or free I Heart
Radio way love you man it
Hosts And Creators
Billy James
Johnny "John Boy" Isley
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