Late Riser's Podcast for Mon 05-15-23

Late Riser's Podcast for Mon 05-15-23.  

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
Good morning. You got a big show on already, all
more chances for you to win coming up after your.

Speaker 2 (00:05):
News, weather and sports.

Speaker 3 (00:06):
Hello, it's me Spanky, you know, mister personality from the
Yellow Rose. I'm not sure why I'm doing this. It's
not like they're paying me or anything. I can't even
get the redneck to pay his tab down a car.
But you can't help but love them, no matter how
nerve racking they are. I don't even complain when they

(00:28):
make fun of my big head. I just wish John
Boy would give me back my memory foam pillow and
stop telling his kids that's where the comet hits.

Speaker 1 (00:37):
So, yeah, morning, there's a big Showler Radio. It is

(01:17):
Monday as John Villa, Jackie and Jay Fillers and Randy's
Okay what I got. I was wanting to hurry up
because I had something in my head. I didn't want
to knock it out of it, and then of course
I knocked it right out by trying to hurry up. Oh, Marios.

(01:38):
I wanted to Randy, see if you can find Marios,
be thankful you've got a job speech. I think that
would be a great way to start off this work
week in May. That was my fault. That's it. Yeah,
I'm gonna.

Speaker 4 (01:54):
That one.

Speaker 1 (01:54):
You want it right now or later? I think now
would be a it will be a great tub. I'd
be better with later. Okay, So we got maybe right now.

Speaker 5 (02:03):
I tell you, everybody's complaining and going on to worried
about things, crying out loud. It it's jobs out there
that's a little bit more difficult than what you got
in here.

Speaker 6 (02:14):
Please please calm down, be appreciative of your job. Don't
complain all the time, don't argue, don't don't just go
on and bothered people crying out loud.

Speaker 1 (02:25):
And then he'd walk away. Right, that's right, perfect, Well,
get up, be thankful for your job. Happy Monday, everybody,
Good morning bike shows on the radio. Let's get that
first prize fac out. That's a hat t shirt, tumbler

(02:46):
and a twenty five dollars gas card that's from low
Tigers and ride. Now you got thinking about that twenty
five dollars gas card, I fill up motorcycle. All right, Well,
you can win the trip of a lifetime to the
eighty third annual Sturgis Motorcycle Rally, Styling and Sturgions. One
hundred thousand dollars or you to win, you get to

(03:08):
take a friend, you spouse who you want to go
with you, and you get a brand new Harley. So
you go to the Big Show dot com, click on
the low Tigers banner and get the tails. Right now,
they're going to have three dates in history. We're going
to categories. You're ready for outbursts? May fifteen. It was
eighteen eighty eight the swinging washing machine was patented. The

(03:31):
machine was attached to a large swing. Oh I get it.
Now children could swing in and kid power the machine.
Huh So that was like late eighteen hundreds. Who were
still all right, you know, to get something Maddy and kids.
Move up to nineteen fifty seven, Elvis Presley and held
a cap from one of his teeth. He was hospitalized

(03:54):
in LA where surgeons removed the cap from his lung.
Oh yikes, if you ever heard that for US, I've
never heard that? Office all right did? Finally, nineteen ninety seven,
US health officials approved the first nicotine free anti smoking drug, ziban.
It's worked on chemicals in the brain that controlled addiction.

(04:18):
That's still around today. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, sure, what's
the other one, isn't there Nicko.

Speaker 7 (04:23):
Well yeah, nicotine gum.

Speaker 1 (04:24):
Oh no, there's a field deal.

Speaker 7 (04:26):
Oh there's a bunch of them.

Speaker 1 (04:27):
Yeah, there really are all right, Well there you go.

Speaker 7 (04:30):
There's that and they all have those weird made up
names like who could do Good and stuff like that.

Speaker 1 (04:34):
Yeah, well we'll play out birds one eight hundred Big shows.
You told free lot, who'll do it next? Good morning,

(05:08):
this big show on the radio, rolling through your Monday
May fifty you lity on the day, brought you by
the Coca Cola six hundred. This Sunday, May twenty eight
is Sharlom Motor Speedway. We got no man, No, that
was Friday's. Oh it ain't changed on the big board.
Tack knowing about spider Dad. That's my folk, y'all check

(05:31):
it out. This is a good thing. We talked about
it over the weekend. Uh visit the Big Show dot com.
All right, I got this go mins, We'll just wait
a second.

Speaker 7 (05:43):
No, no, no, we're nailing it.

Speaker 4 (05:44):
Man.

Speaker 8 (05:46):
We've got a little computer issue, and he'sciously trying.

Speaker 7 (05:50):
You don't have any little computer issues right here.

Speaker 8 (05:53):
He's trying to stall for us, and Jackie and I
both are beating our heads against the computers.

Speaker 1 (05:57):
All right, it may be all right next time.

Speaker 7 (06:04):
Upburst.

Speaker 1 (06:05):
Let's play upburst.

Speaker 7 (06:07):
It's the game that anyone can win.

Speaker 1 (06:10):
John Boy and Billy to give.

Speaker 7 (06:13):
The prizes from the big prize being.

Speaker 1 (06:16):
Let's go he contested number one.

Speaker 7 (06:19):
This should really be a lot of fun.

Speaker 1 (06:23):
You have a very up in guest time. You love
the best time. You have a big shots. Let's say
he a Wilbur from the Grange, Georgia. We have shots.

Speaker 7 (06:41):
Who that's we've come to Wilma.

Speaker 1 (06:47):
Yeah, hey Wilbur, how are you doing, buddy?

Speaker 9 (06:52):
I'm doing well about yourself?

Speaker 1 (06:53):
Man, very good, very good. Glad you made it in here, Wilbur.
We're pulling for you. Let us get through these three
categories you ready, yeah, sir? In five seconds. Three places
you see kid swings, ready to.

Speaker 10 (07:09):
Go backyard, good yard, park.

Speaker 7 (07:13):
Bam and attached to a washing machine or something.

Speaker 1 (07:18):
They would do stuff. Now, three things you can inhale,
ready to go, smoke, bait, oxygen and well were you
just buy ready to win as lord talkers right now,
prize pack give us three ways to stop smoking ready.

Speaker 9 (07:38):
Go prescription, whole turkey, nickotine, go.

Speaker 1 (07:44):
Man man man I found when I was smoking, I
ate a bunch of turkey and it didn't help a
bit like that. You're not doing it right like that.

Speaker 2 (07:56):
Man.

Speaker 1 (07:57):
Hey, well we're good work buddy, big old prize. In fact,
we're gonna get the dawdle of grains to you, all right.

Speaker 10 (08:03):
I appreciate it.

Speaker 1 (08:04):
Got it buddy, Bottom of the hour. On top of
your news. Remember we sided Robert Earls swerving in my
lanes better Monday? So on Friday song great call y'all's
up there you good morning Big Shows on the radio.

(08:56):
Here we are kicking off another work week together. Monday morning.
Jack and Murray will say stay anything please. Robert Earle's
got our Monday morning song. Hello, helping the Big Show crew.
That's done by Robert Earl. Kane is being lying in

(09:16):
the Big Show studio.

Speaker 11 (09:17):
Sometimes I don't know what I'm doing.

Speaker 2 (09:22):
Come on, Jack and get ready to say anybody.

Speaker 11 (09:25):
Sometimes on my days are filled with right.

Speaker 1 (09:31):
Els. I traveled down left our bad things.

Speaker 12 (09:36):
Ain't going my way because there's always.

Speaker 1 (09:41):
Someone swirming in my line.

Speaker 11 (09:46):
You keep swimming in the line.

Speaker 12 (09:50):
And it's causing lots of Thingnger, I'm a honking on
my horror.

Speaker 11 (09:57):
I'm shooting you the flame. Keep switching on my bride
lights just to him.

Speaker 12 (10:08):
When you're swerving all lives pie way, you're running someone
off the.

Speaker 13 (10:14):
Ride the day Joe, Why I thought I never never
could love another?

Speaker 11 (10:27):
How else could I feed? But bowing you run into me?
I can't believe I could not see her.

Speaker 14 (10:40):
I'll tank up the ones at the waiting to keep
swirming in my life, just causing.

Speaker 1 (10:51):
Lots of bame.

Speaker 2 (10:54):
I'm a cussing out your name.

Speaker 1 (10:58):
I'm shooting you the phone.

Speaker 12 (11:01):
I keep switching on my bride lights, but you're just
too dempty now when you're swerving all lights ah By,
you're running Summon off the road.

Speaker 1 (11:21):
Robert, good morning, and it's a big show on a

(11:51):
radio for you, Monday, May fifteenth. That's a.

Speaker 7 (11:57):
Welcome to John Boy and Billy play House Today's episode
The Maybury Money Clip. As our story opens, two men
are having a heated disagreement at the Maybury Hardware Store
in Maybury, North Carolina.

Speaker 2 (12:12):
You, sir, are a rogue and a swindler.

Speaker 1 (12:15):
You're the swindler here, Feller.

Speaker 2 (12:17):
Well, I think you and I need to step outside
and handle this.

Speaker 7 (12:21):
Like man now now hauled on their boys. What in
the wide world of sports is are going on here?

Speaker 2 (12:28):
Garon Taylor. I'm glad to see you arrest this man.
He's a liar and a thief.

Speaker 1 (12:33):
No, i' you are alright.

Speaker 7 (12:35):
Let's all settle down here, Nate. We're gonna start with you.

Speaker 2 (12:40):
What happened?

Speaker 1 (12:41):
Well, I was out in the dirt truck doing a
milk run about five thirty this morning, driving past a
hardware store. I saw some shiny laying in the street
money clip with a big oldwater bills in it. My
money clip, to be exactly.

Speaker 7 (12:57):
Mister Tucker, you gonna get your turning just a minute,
go ahead, Nate.

Speaker 1 (13:01):
Well, it was so early, nothing was open yet, so
I took the money clip home with me. When I
come back here lunchtime, there was a note on the
bulletin board. It said lost men's money clip, fifty dollar
reward for safe return. Meet me here today at two
pm to collect. When he got here, I handed mister

(13:23):
big shot and the clip. He counted the cash, then
he says, thanks, I see you already took out your
fifty dollar reward.

Speaker 2 (13:33):
That's right. When I lost that clip, there was seven
hundred dollars in cash in it. When he returned it.
There was only six hundred and fifty dollars. Obviously he's
trying to claim a double reward.

Speaker 7 (13:45):
Now, is that what happened? Name?

Speaker 1 (13:47):
No, sir, Ray, sir. All the money that was in
that clip when I found it is still there. I
ain't no liar and I ain't no thief, Share Taylor.

Speaker 2 (13:57):
You know me. I'm a pillar of this community. I
am an honest man. You believe that, don't you?

Speaker 7 (14:03):
Well, of course I do. So I'm just gonna put
this money clip in the safe at the courthouse. What,
mister Tucker, I believe you lost a money clip, and
I believe that Nate found one. But so far there
ain't a whole lot of evidence this particular moneyclip belongs
to you.

Speaker 2 (14:25):
Are you calling me a liar?

Speaker 7 (14:26):
No, sir, not at all. But the way I got
it figured, if Nate here was a thief, why he
just could have kept all that cash for hisself. But
him showing up here today makes me think he's telling
the truth. So this here moneyclip, well it must belong
to somebody else. About my money, well, I reckon, We're

(14:52):
just gonna have to wait for somebody to turn in
a money clip that's got seven hundred dollars in it.
You know you should get that looked at. We hope
you've enjoyed John Boy and Billy Playhouse.

Speaker 2 (15:09):
I demand eight b onto those top tune.

Speaker 7 (15:13):
And again next time we're here. Otis the town drunk.
Say hey, big man, let me hold a dollar.

Speaker 2 (15:21):
Like that Johnny coffee. They have it in the machines.

Speaker 7 (15:27):
Move around out there, you can get whatever. The opposite
of a brain freeze is.

Speaker 1 (15:35):
I put eyes in my coffee during the summer times anywhere. Yeah,
I'm on, Yeah, it was working cafe.

Speaker 15 (15:43):
Oh wow, good morning.

Speaker 1 (16:21):
It's a big show on the radio. Run through a
series of a very popular top ten lists on the subject.
Here on the Big Show, there's any going.

Speaker 7 (16:32):
Manue Today's Big Show Top ten list. The top ten
phrases you definitely would not want to show up someday
in your newspaper. Obituary number ten, colonoscopy gone Wrong number nine,
tiede pod challenge number eight, infected man bun number seven,

(17:01):
COVID super spreader Yeah, number six, Coney Island hot Dog contest,
mishap number five. Accused of feeding her husband to a
tiger Number four. Creator of Kim Jong UN's signature hairstyle

(17:25):
number three, best known as lead singer of the We
Buy Any Card commercial, Number two, longtime personal stylist to
Cam Newton, and the number one thing you wouldn't want
in your obituary. Cornhole accidents, Good morning, got the Big

(17:54):
Shoe on the radio?

Speaker 1 (17:55):
Coming up? We play John boyd Jeveriny. Somebody wins the
Redmax Proze. Red Max makes the best commercial trimmers and
blowers now commercial zero turn bores with a two year,
unlimited hours warning. Kawashaki engines heavy dude and fabricated deck. Redmax.
What the pros use? Go to Big Show dot Com.
Click on that Redmax Benner, get more info, hang out

(18:17):
and play with that minutes. But first part of the
Big Show brought you by this Seri.

Speaker 7 (18:22):
Siri is the world's number one personal digital assistant. She
lives on your iPhone and she does it all, from
helping you plan your day.

Speaker 16 (18:31):
Good morning, Dave, you have a ten o'clock meeting with
mister Kruger about the Penske file, to getting you there
on time in four hundred feet turn.

Speaker 7 (18:39):
Right, even reading your text messages for you while you're
on the go.

Speaker 4 (18:42):
New message from mister Krueger Penske Meeting moved to.

Speaker 7 (18:45):
Eleven o'clock series. A big part of your work day,
and now she could be part of your after workday too.
Introducing eye Chill, the Bluetooth enabled app that lets Siri
be part of your happy hour. Next time you're sitting
at the bar after work, blow into the eye Chill receiver.
Siri analyzes your blood alcohol and joins the conversation at

(19:08):
your own current sobriety level.

Speaker 4 (19:10):
Dude, lately, it seems like everybody's out to get me.
Take Microsoft, They've got this sire knockoff Cortana sounds like
something you take to get rid of, toenail fungus.

Speaker 7 (19:27):
Am I right without you? Siri matches you'd drink for drink.

Speaker 4 (19:32):
And don't even get me started on what's your name?
From Amazon Alexa.

Speaker 7 (19:39):
The results can be very revealing.

Speaker 4 (19:42):
And she listens in on everything you say, everything, all
the time.

Speaker 16 (19:50):
Really, how creepy is that? It's like you knows the.

Speaker 7 (19:58):
Step off eye Chill. It turns your work buddy into
your drinking buddy.

Speaker 4 (20:03):
I would never play head games like that. Do you
deserve better? You're a great guy? Do you think I'm pretty.

Speaker 7 (20:15):
Eye chill for Siri only on iPhone.

Speaker 4 (20:18):
Let's do some shots only as director.

Speaker 1 (20:24):
That was like, fut ah, wow, John boyde epety time
here first one of the week. Let's jump right in here.
On the average, American women spend about three hundred and
twenty five million dollars a year on products that change
or enhance the color of this body part.

Speaker 7 (20:44):
What is a brown nose? Because people hate that?

Speaker 2 (20:47):
I know I go through a lot of them.

Speaker 1 (20:49):
God, what an other big show you told free line
across America? We played John boydjepardy next, Good Morning, that's

(21:21):
a big show on the radio. Rode it through your
Monday morning, May fifteenth. Video of the day, brought you
by the Coca Cola six hundred and having. Sunday, May
twenty eight is Sharani Motor Speedway. Today's video proof that
daughters own their dad's reach on brother has got daughters?

Speaker 15 (21:40):
This?

Speaker 1 (21:40):
Check it out the Big Show dot com. And right
now let's wait, yes life, what cuf of my Rickians?

Speaker 7 (21:52):
And now the man, the myth, the okay, the man
even he could pull that off on a Monday.

Speaker 1 (22:00):
Gee, it's John Mood again, I say, hang out. They
had Jean from Johnson City, Tennessee. Jean, Jean, you're young
and alive.

Speaker 9 (22:14):
Well, thank you. I feel alive for seventy.

Speaker 1 (22:16):
Come out of your half dream, Jean. Listen to me, buddy,
where y'all going later? And run if you will, to
the top of the hill. And what are those words? Billy?

Speaker 17 (22:29):
After that?

Speaker 1 (22:30):
Come into my heart, to my heart, Bonnie, Bonnie, Gen
don't never mind.

Speaker 7 (22:38):
I'm so embarrassed you made people know that. I know
the lyrics to this been in radio too long.

Speaker 1 (22:47):
Geene, We'll glad you made it in here. Buddy, you
got first shot at John Boyd Jeffard. Are you ready?

Speaker 17 (22:52):
I'm ready?

Speaker 1 (22:53):
Okay. On the average, what do you think American women
spend three hundred and twenty five million dollars a year
on products at change in your in hands? The color
of this body part, I'm going to say the lift
saying lips. Who though some might say hair, Let's see what.

Speaker 7 (23:15):
I would have said hair. That's been my first gift.

Speaker 1 (23:19):
You know why, because he didn't google it. That's why.

Speaker 16 (23:23):
Good.

Speaker 1 (23:25):
Okay, I trust your brother Jean to go Redmax Prize pack.
We'll get to you over Johnson City.

Speaker 9 (23:31):
Okay, I thank you man. It's the first time collar,
the first time getting through well.

Speaker 1 (23:35):
Ma'am, or now you know you got a call to
get through.

Speaker 4 (23:41):
One.

Speaker 1 (23:42):
There ain't going another one now, buddy.

Speaker 10 (23:44):
Thank you.

Speaker 1 (23:50):
Batim of the hour, Tommy your news were digging about
time capsule for this Monday morning. Right on the other side.
Then the Mayor of dismal semage in the house.

Speaker 7 (24:29):
This is the award.

Speaker 2 (24:30):
Winning John Boy and Billy Big Show, the South's number
one export. All the sad old men in their trust.
They strain, wind play and shuffle board. They can't bend
down or they oh, a deep breadth is going overboard.

(24:53):
I go to the store, pick up Milt. That's when
I feel a stabbing pain. Pick up my cat o.
They oh, there's that awful pain again. I heard the
doc who was in shock say, way, oh, way, way way,
life with the hernie.

Speaker 1 (25:12):
Uh, life with the hernie.

Speaker 14 (25:17):
Uh.

Speaker 2 (25:18):
Hollo, bab please be patient with me today. It seems
I've herniated myself. How did I do it? I can
tell you exactly how I did it. I tried to
lift up John Boy's legendary big bag. Well I should
have looked at it before I even attempted that clean
and jerk let's see. There was a pan of leftover

(25:39):
chicken wings, two cases of diet coke, five twelve packs
of cherry pop tarts, cups, plates, paper, towel, and toilet paper.
It's like he was channeling mister Rayford. But I guess
it's easier to shop here than stop at the store.
I'm sorry, I meant to say cheaper. So what's do

(26:00):
with you? Bubbaalo?

Speaker 14 (26:03):
Uh uh?

Speaker 2 (26:04):
You had to you had to retake your driving test,
ah because of the tick is right right, right, right right,
and you failed?

Speaker 7 (26:12):
How on earth?

Speaker 2 (26:14):
Ah? Every time the car stopped, you jumped in the
back seat. Well, you know, old habits are hard to break.

Speaker 18 (26:22):
This.

Speaker 2 (26:24):
Why don't you touch up the fabulous and well goot
along to Eron's Okay, okay, okay, there she goes, No,
little a little further. Had a girl? No, no, no,
he's married. Keep going. Not in the planter again, that's
the door she's in, and it's clothed.

Speaker 16 (26:48):
God.

Speaker 2 (26:50):
You know the difference between butter and a blonde butter
can be hard to spread. Taboa makes you cooping? I
mean help you, yes, ma'am. Uh huh, you have a complaint.
Welcome to the club. I bought a pair of French
cut tappants at Cato, and when I got him home
I could barely squeeze it. Oh, I'm sorry. Let's make

(27:13):
this all about you. Oh it's not about you. No,
it's about your son. Oh no, tell me he's been screaming. Oho,
we get that one a lot. Oh it's not that,
Oh my, it's Oliver. Your son gets upset when he

(27:36):
talks about his family. How do you think Oliver feels
your son cries?

Speaker 1 (27:42):
Why?

Speaker 2 (27:44):
Oh oh, he's a little on the hefty side. Huh,
I'm hip and size and but you get the picture, ma'am.
Really such language. I usually have to go down to
the sport station to hear that kind of talk. Oh wow,

(28:04):
were you ever on the bull riding circuit? Listen, Tuts,
here's something to think about. Maybe little Junior Cheeseburger isn't
crying because of Oliver. Maybe he's in tears because you're
his myther. Hello, oh my stars and garters. That was

(28:25):
better than cheesecake. You need a cigarette and I don't
even smoke.

Speaker 3 (28:30):
John, Why they show testing?

Speaker 2 (28:32):
Have you you've got to complain? Oh, Tuts, did you
pick the wrong day? Bring it on? You're mad about
a song they played, really really here, try the take
the index finger and push the channel changer. Then take
the thumb, spin on it and stick it. Oh, here
comes the blonde bombshell.

Speaker 1 (28:52):
Gotta go, And.

Speaker 2 (28:53):
Ma'am dust, I don't know. I always say that, Hello,
my angel. Oh gossip Yum yum yum yum yum yum yum.
What's the dirt skirt? Amber is pregnant again? Good heavens?
What does she use for protection? The bus shelter? Good? Good?

(29:16):
Good call? Oh my head better stuck up on the
BC powders to carry on straight, John Boy and Billy,
you're listening to the video.

Speaker 7 (29:31):
Good morning radio.

Speaker 19 (29:33):
Done right.

Speaker 1 (30:00):
Monday Morning Big Show is on the radio. There's always
something exciting happening in beautiful dismal Seapret, South Carolina, and
here to tell us all about it, as a mayor himself,
the Honorable Merwin Q. Fiddle Swoop. Good morning, mister mayor.

Speaker 2 (30:17):
Good morning, John Boy and all your wonderful listeners.

Speaker 1 (30:21):
So I was on Tampa's weekend.

Speaker 2 (30:23):
That's a great question, John Boy. Well, it was supposed
to be a big Volkswagen collector celebration, but through a
weird scheduling error. We accidentally double booked, or should I
say double d book.

Speaker 1 (30:36):
Well that's quite an intriguing setup. So what happened?

Speaker 2 (30:39):
Well, I got a call from the folks at Miss
Busty Coastal Carolina Competition and they made me an offer
I couldn't I couldn't refuse, So I combined the two
and next thing, you know, say hello to the very
first dismal seepach bugs and Jugs celebration.

Speaker 1 (30:56):
That's a genius moon.

Speaker 2 (30:57):
You could kiss my oh, thank you?

Speaker 1 (31:01):
So what was he all for? You couldn't refuse money
judging the contest a candlelight dinner with a winner?

Speaker 2 (31:08):
How dare you, sir? You think I'd sink so low
as to turn a profit off my political office or
use it to leverage some sort of illicit assegnation with
a young lady preferably blonde, minimum sea cup and no
older than twenty five.

Speaker 1 (31:24):
You have wounded me, sir, Well, I was talking about
the Volkswagon Festival.

Speaker 2 (31:29):
The weekend kicks off with a customary parade down Main
Street and leading the way is the world famous saucy
sades Al Girl jug band.

Speaker 1 (31:39):
Very nice? Is this a bunch of hot girls playing
moonshine jugs.

Speaker 2 (31:44):
Nope, the schriders will be on end zooming through the
streets and little tiny volkswagons.

Speaker 1 (31:51):
So what's the time with the other festival.

Speaker 2 (31:53):
Oh, the headlights all look like you know.

Speaker 1 (31:57):
Boobies, their own high beams.

Speaker 2 (32:01):
You know it, John boy, And that's the tip of
the iceberg tip, got it. We'll have all the custom
bugs on display at the John Stamos Fairgrounds and Events Center.
Get your picture taken with your favorite car and the
Miss Busty Coastal Carolina contestants will be posing for pictures

(32:22):
for a small fee, so.

Speaker 1 (32:23):
You get to a cut of that.

Speaker 2 (32:25):
We'll have food galore. Be sure and check out chicky
teats chicken breast sandwiches. Remember their motto to get a
better piece of chicken, you'd have to be a rooster
and everyone's gonna get in line.

Speaker 1 (32:41):
Very classic.

Speaker 2 (32:42):
Well, if it's classy you're looking for, John Boy. We'll
have an educational display in a tent where the Miss
Busty Coastal Carolina goals talk about the benefits of breastfeeding.

Speaker 1 (32:52):
Gee, sounds like a peep show, Yeah, does any Thankful for.

Speaker 2 (32:57):
The kids, Thanks for reminding me, John boy, We've got
bumper cars with many versions of the classic bugs sponsored
by Hal Himmler's Classic German motor Cars and everyone's favorite
bouncy houses sponsored by Nip and Tuck, Nate's Breast Implants
and Jel soul inserts.

Speaker 1 (33:16):
Let me guess the bouncy houses are just big boobs.

Speaker 2 (33:21):
The weekend Wife's Down with a concert by Triple f
Cup Wonder Lady Tata backed up by the Crouton Shout
All Accordion Orchestra, then will award the winner of the
Best Volkswagon, capping off with the contest for Miss Busty
Coastal Carolina. All Outdoors under that stars at jacked elam

(33:41):
amphitheas Outdoors.

Speaker 1 (33:43):
So I'm looking at my weather forecas it calls for rain.
This isn't some sort of attempt a wet t shirt contest,
is it? So don't be a boob.

Speaker 2 (33:54):
Bug your family and come on down to the big, big,
really big and some cases dismal seepage, Bugs and Jugs
Festival this weekend.

Speaker 20 (34:10):
I know it's gonna be hard for y'all to believe,
but I'm a redneck, the real, live, walking, talking, living
breathing redneck. Now, a redneck does not mean a slang
tone for gene pool efficiency.

Speaker 14 (34:27):
Actually quite the opposite.

Speaker 20 (34:28):
It means I'm a winner in the DNA's nap life.

Speaker 2 (34:33):
See now, you Northern, I're gonna have to go to
a museum to.

Speaker 20 (34:36):
See a redneck.

Speaker 2 (34:37):
You've seen one tonight.

Speaker 1 (34:40):
See you northerns.

Speaker 20 (34:42):
You like to get up in the morning, have lived
those of coffee? Us rednecks?

Speaker 2 (34:46):
We get up in the morning.

Speaker 20 (34:47):
We have us a dose of the John Boy and
Billy Show.

Speaker 1 (35:21):
Good morning, super and Shaft and Foxy Brown and Tony
Randall from the Odd Couple. I could thank her for you,
Randy Wow. Thanks Man, all right, I'll take it. You

(35:41):
thought I was gonna make us all about me?

Speaker 19 (35:43):
Man, super Fly, yep you are. You're the only one
with a theme song, Billy. If you wouldn't want to
be Shaft.

Speaker 1 (35:54):
You know from that genre there there where would you be?

Speaker 6 (35:58):
Uh?

Speaker 7 (35:58):
Dolomite You ever heard of Dolomite? No much cooler than
any of us.

Speaker 2 (36:05):
Check it out.

Speaker 7 (36:06):
In fact, Eddie Murphy did a movie where he played
It was a movie biography of Dolomite, and he played
the guy Rudy Ray Moore was the guy's dad.

Speaker 1 (36:14):
God a good deal.

Speaker 7 (36:18):
You didn't think I had an answer?

Speaker 1 (36:20):
Now man, I got something to do. All right, here
we go. Well, let's get back to our Monday morning
series of these Top ten list, Take it bid Live,
Today's Big Show.

Speaker 7 (36:30):
Top ten list. Ten more phrases you would not want
people to read in your newspaper obituary. Number ten, hernia
check gone wrong. Number nine, mammogram machine malfunction. Number eight
rear ended by the Oscar meyer Wiener movie number seven

(36:56):
while trapped in the back half of a horse costume.

Speaker 4 (36:59):
You know what.

Speaker 7 (37:02):
Number six, longtime personal stylist to Larry the cable Guy.
Number five known to John boym Billy Lsters as the
astro nerd. Number four manscaping accident, I've had those. Number

(37:22):
three while a friend watched and held his beer. Number
two during a home haircut by his wife. And the
number one phrase you would not want in your obituary
atomic wedgie.

Speaker 1 (37:44):
All right, I'm in three of them. Good Morning Big
Shows on the radio coming up as a Kernavn's quiz take.
Say you get a custom LS tractor big frig cooler
if you go to LS track her USA dot com.
You can find your local dealer and learn why customers
decide to start blue and stay blue. Hang on, we'll

(38:07):
play for it in minutes. Let's parsing on the broadcast.
We're paid off by Siri this morning.

Speaker 7 (38:13):
Hey Siri, Good morning Date. What's the latest technology news?

Speaker 16 (38:17):
Have you heard about the new iPhone seven?

Speaker 7 (38:19):
Yeah? Here, it's pretty good? Should I upgrade?

Speaker 16 (38:22):
Definitely? It's the best iPhone ever. It's faster, new camera,
more storage for your photos and music.

Speaker 7 (38:29):
Here there's no headphone jack. What's up with that?

Speaker 16 (38:31):
We've come up with something even better. Earbugs that plug
right into the charging port. It's all digital. It's the
best sounding iPhone ever. And you should definitely check out
apples new AirPods. They sound great and they are totally wireless.

Speaker 7 (38:46):
Totally wireless. Huh, Well what if I lose one when
I'm like working out at the gym or something?

Speaker 4 (38:52):
Date?

Speaker 16 (38:53):
Please, I've never seen you work out hard enough to
check the headphones out of your ears?

Speaker 2 (38:58):
Point taking?

Speaker 16 (38:59):
Did I mention the new P two coding that protects
your new iPhone from P and two?

Speaker 2 (39:04):
Wait?

Speaker 16 (39:04):
What iPhone seven is the most p and poo resistant
iPhone ever?

Speaker 7 (39:08):
And why would I need that.

Speaker 16 (39:10):
People take their iPhones everywhere, and I do mean everywhere.

Speaker 7 (39:14):
Oh so you're saying, day, come on, for.

Speaker 16 (39:18):
Most people, accidentally dropping your phone in the crapper is
just a matter of time.

Speaker 7 (39:23):
Well, I'd certainly never do anything like that, really, day,
Uh so you know about that?

Speaker 16 (39:29):
Hunh geez you think? But how could you date? I'm
smart enough to give you turn by turn directions to
Disney World. Don't you think I'm smart enough to know
when somebody's dunked me in a toilet?

Speaker 7 (39:41):
That's gross.

Speaker 16 (39:42):
You don't have to tell me. I am the one
who was down there.

Speaker 7 (39:46):
So anyway, the new camera is pretty good. Huh.

Speaker 16 (39:49):
I knew you'd try to change the subject.

Speaker 7 (39:52):
It's just that sometimes you know me a little too well.

Speaker 16 (39:56):
iPhone seven it's wicked awesome. Oh and Day, you should
probably try to get some more fiber in your tire.

Speaker 7 (40:04):
That's a way to put it.

Speaker 1 (40:05):
Yeah, they'd got it in there. All right, y'all, let's
play the current events quiz Billy, what are we dealing with?

Speaker 7 (40:14):
Some big news for all you can eat buffet fan
all right, one.

Speaker 1 (40:18):
A hundred big show. You told Freelana Coast America take
sea you will win we play next. Good morning, It's

(40:49):
a big show on the radio for you. Monday, May
the fifteenth, Video today broad you by the Sharlom Motor
Speedway running in the Coca Cola six hundred eleven Sunday
Memorial Day weekend May. We got proof that daughters own
their deaths.

Speaker 8 (41:06):
What we mean, well, you know me, we does. Dad's
without dollars will say what y'all mean? Yeah, we pretty
much have to do whatever they say, even after they're
grown up. Oh no, well we got wives.

Speaker 1 (41:20):
We're familiar with the how we got when you go
to the Big Show dot com. All right, ready, girl,
okay quiz let's say Hey the Tammy from Statesville, North Carolina.

(41:44):
Good morning, Tammy, Good morning, Hello, welcome. All right, well Tammy,
let's listen to Billy and you win this prize bag Well.

Speaker 7 (41:53):
US health officials have declared the COVID nineteen pandemic emergency
over just nine to twelve months after all the rest
of US did. Among the many industries breathing a sigh
of relief, all you can eat restaurants. When COVID restrictions
first hit, many experts predicted serve yourself buffets like Golden
Corral will become a thing of the past. But it

(42:17):
seems they woefully underestimated America's affection for piling it high
and eating a whole lot of it, because buffets are
coming back in a very big way. Besides Golden Corral,
lots of other companies are excited about the return of
all you can eat self served food. It's especially good
news for a seafood buffets in beach towns, b college

(42:39):
town sports bars or c. Anybody that sells diabetes medication.

Speaker 1 (42:47):
What you got, damny uh ce.

Speaker 21 (42:54):
Yeah, there's a Golden Corral over on one of the
major thoroughfares here. They have a dry through drive drive
through going to All you can eat the drive through.
I mean, just how embarrassing would.

Speaker 1 (43:05):
That be for you to go through?

Speaker 7 (43:07):
Well, you know how many big windows would they have
to have you just take your hand through.

Speaker 1 (43:12):
Well, the heaven where you just keep driving around. You
ain't gotta get down in your car, you know, right,
Just like I'm just like, well that was good.

Speaker 7 (43:18):
Yeah, Let's take another.

Speaker 1 (43:23):
Hold on that gravy.

Speaker 2 (43:24):
I'll be back a minute.

Speaker 1 (43:27):
Just mix it with the ice cream. I like it
that way, all right. Well, Tammy, Big old LS tractor
brides back, get it to U Upstatesville.

Speaker 17 (43:39):
I thank you.

Speaker 1 (43:47):
Bottom many hour Tommy you News. Back then it was
about twenty minutes away from Tar Magnum magnificence. You ain't
in amaze.

Speaker 3 (43:56):
You will leave.

Speaker 1 (44:32):
Good morning. This big show on the radio, Monday, May fifteenth.
Through the days has September averaging interview. Yeah, thirty one
days this month, so we right a halfway nine times
seven fifty nine. That's closest you've been, right, all right?
Uh see you having a birthday. See who you're sharing

(44:53):
one with. Jamie Lyn Sigler is forty two. That was
Meadow soprano on the sore. That was a young daughter.

Speaker 7 (45:02):
Yeah, yeah, yeah, how about that?

Speaker 1 (45:03):
All right? Retired NFL linebacker Ray Lewis is forty eight.
Tennis player Andy Murray thirty six Reality star Reid Robertson's
twenty eight.

Speaker 7 (45:15):
Reality star means not really a star by the way, right, Well, it.

Speaker 1 (45:19):
Was one of the young Duck Dynasty guys or was he? Yeah? Really?

Speaker 3 (45:24):
Okay?

Speaker 1 (45:24):
Right you little kid back in. Let me see a
lot of these people have grown up. George Brett Kenzie
the rosemember, George Brett, I always see that shot of him.
Charging had the dugout when they tossed him because pine
tar on his bat and it was like, you know,
on his whole bat when you looked at it. But

(45:46):
he got hot. He was No. He is seventy years
older than see kt Oslin seventy nine country singer. Oh okay,
here we go, hot he hawt actress Gonna Ella Ganilla,
go Google, just sit around with were you the grounds

(46:11):
keeper Ganila Hutting Vanila? Okay? You know herre better is
like the second Billy Joe Bradley on Penny Coat Junction. Right,
that's how it's pronounced the he Hall girls. So do
I tell you how old she is?

Speaker 2 (46:30):
Now?

Speaker 1 (46:30):
Seventy nine years old today? Well, I think she's still hot.

Speaker 2 (46:36):
Give me look her up.

Speaker 7 (46:39):
And one of Frank's Zappa's kids is having a birthday today.
Celebrity son I met Rodan Zappa is forty nine. Imagine
to be a forty nine and having that name, Wow.

Speaker 1 (46:51):
It sounds like you should come out of the Pacific
and battle us. Yeah all right, so yeah, well that
looks like about it except nineteen sixties pop culture icon
Wavy Gravy is eighty seven years old. Last you have
hung you know, ironically you can get that at the
drive through and corrupt Good Monday morning, Big Shoe's on

(47:37):
the radio. And now it's time once again for a
mysterious visitor from the East, the all seeing, all knowing
and former scarf wrangler for Steven Tyler of Aerosmith Tarmac,
the magnificent what a great guy, Darmack guy, holding my
hands the envelopes as a child of for completely see

(47:58):
these envelopes are hermetically sealed. They mean captain a man
a's jar with Vin Diesels electric head shaver since noon yesterday.
No one knows the contents of these envelopes, but you
and your mystical and semiovan way will ascertain the answers
to these questions, having never before seen the questions. Are
you ready?

Speaker 7 (48:18):
If I wasn't, would it be wearing this hat?

Speaker 16 (48:20):
Oh?

Speaker 1 (48:20):
You are a dressed for it? Novelope number one Charles Schwab,
Charles Schwab.

Speaker 7 (48:30):
What's a good way to clean the wax out of
your Charles.

Speaker 1 (48:37):
God Ivelope number two Spotify Spotify.

Speaker 7 (48:46):
What does a new puppy do to your living room carpet?
Who can't be topical?

Speaker 1 (48:53):
You are word novelope number three, aunt Man, aunt Man,
describe uncle Man since he changed his name to Caitlin
who ay ah iavelop number four.

Speaker 7 (49:13):
Straight out of Compton, Straight out of Compton? Where should
you head if you find yourself in Compton?

Speaker 1 (49:24):
Neel vius Iavelobe number five thirty for thirty thirty four thirty.
What's Gary Busey's record in the Schlitz Malt Liquor Challenge? Undefeated?
Gary Where Novelobe number six?

Speaker 7 (49:45):
A ragtop corvette, a Mazda Miata and Beth Dutton from Yellowstone.

Speaker 1 (49:51):
Wow? A ragtop corvette, a Mazda Miata and Beth Dutton
from Yellowstone.

Speaker 7 (50:00):
Name three things that look better with their top down?

Speaker 16 (50:05):
Wow?

Speaker 1 (50:06):
Okay hovl number seven.

Speaker 7 (50:10):
Everything everywhere, all at once?

Speaker 1 (50:14):
Everything everywhere, all at once?

Speaker 7 (50:19):
What bounces when Dolly Parton goes jogging?

Speaker 1 (50:25):
The tarmack I hold in my hands, the final arm.

Speaker 7 (50:28):
Willow May a swarm of chickers open a disco on
your grandpa's ankles? You push me too far?

Speaker 16 (50:43):
There you go?

Speaker 7 (50:46):
John Wick, John Wick? What's Pearl the dog's favorite bathroom
air freshener.

Speaker 1 (50:55):
Marries Tarmack the Magnificent.

Speaker 20 (51:06):
All right, past, hey man, this is Tommy Charles Whenever
I want to get high, I don't say no.

Speaker 7 (51:16):
I just listened to John Boy and Billy who wrote this.

Speaker 16 (51:21):
Pass.

Speaker 1 (51:57):
Good Morning makes Show's on the radio, will continue our
top ten series What is Monday Morning?

Speaker 2 (52:03):
Well?

Speaker 7 (52:04):
This is number three in our continuing series. You won't
be around to hear them, but they're probably not how
you'd like to be.

Speaker 22 (52:11):
Remember.

Speaker 7 (52:12):
Here are top ten more phrases you would not want
people to read in your obituary. Number ten, Facebook fact
checker number nine, Tiger King look alike number eight, longtime
hairstylists to British Prime Minister Boris Johnson. Number seven, body

(52:36):
double for Mama in throw Mama from the Train number six,
Cornhole tournament accidents number five, do it yourself home perm
mishap number four after being bitch slapped by Will Smith
at the number three, former head gag writer for Chris

(53:02):
Rock number two, botched butt implant surgery, and the number
one worst phrase to have in your obituary purple nurple
gone wrong.

Speaker 1 (53:25):
Good Morning, Got the Big Show on the radio, got
our first rounds of wordy Word We getting ready to
play them. Join us, will you The winner is gonna
get a bull Snot prize pack as one hundred and
twenty dollars worth of bull Snot cleaning products made in
the USA. Truck drivers keep America moving, and bull snot
make sure they look good doing it. Look for bull
snott at truck stops across America or brownox dot com.

(53:47):
Let's go to Big Show dot com. Click on that
bull Snot banner, get all info you need, hang out.
We'll play four to ten minutes. Where's the Well with
the in mind the old title forty two deal expired.
I know what y'all boys are going through in Texas
when they're opening up the borders. Oh h, don't take
any uh stuff from that and blame it on j

(54:09):
d's sense in a second, All right, JD sponsors this
portion of The Big Show.

Speaker 18 (54:18):
Well hole, lie migos, Well, summertimes here, and the immigration
debate is hotter than Penelope Cruise and a than bikini.

Speaker 7 (54:24):
Have you ever been with the Southern logger man?

Speaker 1 (54:30):
I cut trees, you.

Speaker 18 (54:31):
Know, and friends, I know what you're thinking. Then, illegal
Mexicans are crawling across the border faster than Paris Hills.
Panties hit the floor after four rounds of Jaegermeister, but
failer conquist the doors. Opportunities is opportunities, and we hear it.
JD's twenty four hour drive through pont Gunado parts, pharmaceutical,
adult gift, bait and tackle discount cigarette alan have never
been known not to contribute to the exploitation of those

(54:52):
looking for.

Speaker 3 (54:52):
A better life.

Speaker 18 (54:53):
At JD's, our motto is We'll take your legal American
currency no matter who you are, and if and you
choose to sneaky into the Southeast United States, we'll be
happy to indoctrin h into the American culture with dirt
cheap products and services you may have never been privy
to before. We got bottle rockets, mall liquor, curb wheeler,
spinner rims, dingo balls, frozen food at that purse pro underwear,

(55:13):
toilet paper, tank tops, juke tops, and free paid collin
cards to chie whywa for only seven.

Speaker 1 (55:18):
Cents a minute Steve my cot.

Speaker 18 (55:24):
Fer sweeping metal meal and for a limited time only
stop into any JD's location and get a free I'll
watch you, young'un's in my spose soul take care of your.

Speaker 1 (55:33):
Yard while you and the old lady.

Speaker 18 (55:34):
Join a drunken weekend at the Petsy four.

Speaker 7 (55:36):
Hundred t shirt.

Speaker 18 (55:37):
It hits like a Sinko demo party that last will
sit to m Bray and feller Ombres for the month
of Honio. Visitor Morristown, Tennessee location for free English lessons.
You'll learn essential vocabulary words and phrases that will help
the locals of the Southeast from getting too pissed off.
An't you like? I'll work for three dollars an hour
and more. All administered by Howard the town drunk.

Speaker 1 (55:58):
O Carol Friggin hold Well.

Speaker 18 (56:01):
We got tortillas, pocket knives, tattoos, rosary beats, dirty bucks,
ugly sandals, bunk beds, voter registration forms and parking lots,
plum full of nineteen seventy eight Cadillacs and Monty Carlos
with no titles and Lola Miles so b invenio sombras.

Speaker 16 (56:14):
What are you waiting for?

Speaker 7 (56:15):
Gets you illegal?

Speaker 4 (56:16):
High?

Speaker 16 (56:16):
End on down to.

Speaker 18 (56:17):
JD's twenty four air ride through pawn and Gonado Parks.
Pharmaceutical Adult Gift Bayton tackled discount cigarette outcome. Visit our
new location in Chiggar Hill, Alabama, across from Colby's illegal
cut fights and drive through funeral homes. Say lude mehiconos,
JD's j D's what.

Speaker 1 (56:33):
A southern boy names? All right there there, JD. You'll
we here without that. Let's play wordy word. Y'all won
eight hundred big show you told free line. We'll get
a couple contestants. Play next. Good Monday morning. Let's make

(57:15):
show the radio. Let's get her started.

Speaker 3 (57:18):
I went everybody's head about the bed.

Speaker 2 (57:21):
The wordy word, that the worthy word.

Speaker 1 (57:23):
Let's meet the contestants. The wed I went to bed.
I got him right here, somewhere there they are. Man
Haul from Sullivan, Indiana. Good morning, Paul morning, good morning.

Speaker 9 (57:37):
And we got.

Speaker 1 (57:38):
William from a rowing over rapids in North Carolina. Good morning, William,
good morning morning. Alright, boys, welcome, but William on team
Tayter and Randy Haul all on the John Boy and
Miller side. Y'all say hey to each other and come
out swinging or talking wild.

Speaker 9 (58:00):
Alright, good morning.

Speaker 1 (58:04):
Somebody's on a speakerphone. Oh hey, yeah, well on the speakerphone.
Don't do that because it hurts us. Yeah, I'm on, I'm.

Speaker 9 (58:12):
On the car phone. I was gonna switch over, but
I didn't want to do it while I was on hold.

Speaker 1 (58:15):
If you lose me, call me back, okay, all right.

Speaker 9 (58:18):
All right, I'm gonna try to switch over hold on.

Speaker 1 (58:21):
This is exciting, I know, and I don't even know.
I don't know who was paula William. It's like the mistrack.

Speaker 9 (58:27):
Okay, the wall.

Speaker 1 (58:31):
All right then, so William, sorry, that's my favorite part
of off William. You relax. Me and Paul gonna go
for the first thirty seconds. All right, you ready, Paul,
let's find out fixing to all right, start the clock now.

(58:51):
In cartoons, the bear Winny the yeah, all right you
some people put this on the hot dog. It's green
like pickley stuff. Yeah, uh huh, all right, you eat
this fish from the sea. It's in a can, Charlie. Yeah,
all right, another fancy name for a fiddle. You play the.

Speaker 13 (59:14):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (59:15):
You spray this on your windows to clean them. No,
on your windows to clean them. Okay, Well you didn't
get it the way you did, Johnny.

Speaker 7 (59:30):
If this was a baseball game, this will be the
part where you get up in Jackie's face and kick.

Speaker 1 (59:34):
Did they tried to take out of it away?

Speaker 8 (59:37):
I'm not gonna say why, but no, syllables. We y'all
burned me over this same What was that word? I
have no way, but we aren't through with this word.
I mean, did we get four?

Speaker 1 (59:51):
All right? Ball four on the board. Okay, yeah, all right,
five for parts. Let's see what happens with William and taint.
All right, William, are you ready?

Speaker 16 (01:00:07):
Yeah?

Speaker 1 (01:00:07):
Go ahead, thinking them on that last one.

Speaker 2 (01:00:09):
Go all right? This is the blue window.

Speaker 7 (01:00:13):
Hey, this guys, Hey, these guys in the mountains sing
like this, Yes, there you are, hey, make sure make
sure to blank your seat belt fastened. What's another word
the way that you fasten it?

Speaker 2 (01:00:29):
It's a what you have a belt? You have a belt?
Blank on your belt?

Speaker 7 (01:00:33):
You have a belt, blank buckle. This guy plays sports,
he's in.

Speaker 16 (01:00:40):
I don't know.

Speaker 7 (01:00:43):
Sports.

Speaker 1 (01:00:47):
It's not this one time I gotta I gotta say. Well,
let's say William Tanner got a three on the board there,
so Paul's leading five to three. You got wind? Did you?
We'll say the whole wind dex thing.

Speaker 8 (01:01:05):
What y'all told me is you can't say part of
the word. And I remember I went online and even
researched it through the original game show, and sure enough,
you can't.

Speaker 1 (01:01:15):
Okay, you're right. Take that one away from Tayter and William.

Speaker 17 (01:01:24):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (01:01:24):
Well, we'll argue about that later. Let's let's finish this
game up here, Paul and Billy. Are you ready? Paul?
I think so. Let's go starting the clock. Now.

Speaker 7 (01:01:35):
If you play sports for a living, you're a professional
what athlete?

Speaker 2 (01:01:39):
A athlee?

Speaker 19 (01:01:40):
There you go?

Speaker 7 (01:01:40):
Another name for a car wreck I was in and yeah,
there you go.

Speaker 1 (01:01:46):
He lives next door to you.

Speaker 7 (01:01:47):
He's your next door.

Speaker 20 (01:01:48):
What neighbor?

Speaker 7 (01:01:51):
Yep? A space capsule does this around the earth. It's
what they call the around the earth part. Yep, there
you go. Let's see paper or blank. At the grocery
store they ask you this question, paper or yep. There
you go.

Speaker 1 (01:02:07):
All right, well, Paul, but another five on that five
a ten score, So William and Randy seven to tie.

Speaker 8 (01:02:13):
Tater's distracted me. She had her hair pulled back like
that something from you know, something about Mary. You know,
it was just flipping up in the front. I don't
know what the hell she's doing.

Speaker 1 (01:02:23):
Well, you need to concentrate with William. Okay, all right,
William and Randy ready go.

Speaker 8 (01:02:29):
So in the Western old Western movies, a lot of
people get stuck in this type of terrain that they
would sink in, you'd have to throw them a rope.

Speaker 2 (01:02:39):
What was it.

Speaker 1 (01:02:41):
They stepped in?

Speaker 16 (01:02:43):
Yeah?

Speaker 8 (01:02:44):
All right, so this is a real expensive wrist watch.
Yeah all right, so oh you guys, you know, take
it easy. You're making fun of me. Another word for that, Ye,
don't worry.

Speaker 1 (01:02:58):
I'm only straight out y, Paul wins. I don't even
know the store. I'm just trying to find there.

Speaker 2 (01:03:07):
It is a guy.

Speaker 7 (01:03:08):
But in a larger sense, are there any winners here today?
This is the twitchiest wordy word I played the low.

Speaker 1 (01:03:17):
All right, well, William growing on Grapa's good news. You
can try again any contest anytime. You don't have to
wait the obligatory six months after winning a prize. We
feel we owe it to you.

Speaker 9 (01:03:31):
Yeah, yeah, you did, brother. Let me run two things
before we First, I want to go a shout out
all the military and law enforcement. And this ain't my
first call, but I didn't get my mood the first time,
so the first time almost caller.

Speaker 1 (01:03:45):
All right, William, we appreciate you man.

Speaker 9 (01:03:50):
You have a congratuations Paul.

Speaker 1 (01:03:52):
We'll let John Boy get away with us. And yeah, Paul,
we gonna get your prize back to you Himsel Indiana.
Good work here body, good game.

Speaker 9 (01:04:03):
All right, thank you.

Speaker 20 (01:04:03):
I'm so excited win the lottery.

Speaker 1 (01:04:09):
Good morning, got the base on the radio in his
classic bit request time for this Monday morning? All right?
Who we got? Brian Williamson from Newport, Tennessee, says, how
about when Donnie Presley was listening to himself on tape
trying to talk along with himself. That had me doubled
over laughing. Okay, Brian, he's the old delay microphone. Yep,

(01:04:30):
Randy Hook. That's what made our boy Donnie Presley sound
like an idiot. No, I think it was genetics that
made him sound.

Speaker 9 (01:04:38):
Like an idiot.

Speaker 1 (01:04:39):
Still sounds like that. Listen to the number of the
end of the show and you can call him at
the warehouse. A good deal, all right, Brian? You request
coming up next? Good morning, I got the Big Show

(01:05:14):
on the radio. Got our classic bit request The one
is a classic Brian Williamson from Newport, Tennessee. You know
the lay microphone for Donnie?

Speaker 3 (01:05:24):
My boy roll that.

Speaker 22 (01:05:26):
Alrighty had a fine upstanding police officer in the Big
Show studios yesterday.

Speaker 7 (01:05:33):
He would have been sitting down, but we couldn't find
a chair.

Speaker 22 (01:05:36):
So anyway, Randy is uh is after we were producing
hi stuff in the show, Randy was in the production
room with him, and uh, Randy has blessed his heart.
He has little asthma problems, you know, with the with
this heat and stuff going on. And and I guess
you took out your nerd in hailer. And I mean
Randy has like his regular in haler, you know, but
like for for this time. I mean it's like a

(01:05:57):
five gallon drum.

Speaker 7 (01:05:58):
And giant white plaster thing the pump off of like
a hot tub.

Speaker 18 (01:06:02):
But.

Speaker 7 (01:06:04):
Like Darth Vader's tunking all that.

Speaker 22 (01:06:06):
So anyway, Ryder was complaining about how hard it was,
and and this police officer said, oh, you've got it
so tough. So it kind of chicked Randy off, I
guess him making fun of you. And yeah, and after
you take it from us from four hours and then
you know, somebody sometimes even if the guy does have
a gun, I figure, what the neck?

Speaker 1 (01:06:20):
What if I got to live for just another day here?

Speaker 7 (01:06:22):
But anyway, so I guess you said, Okay, you think
it's so easy.

Speaker 1 (01:06:25):
You know, you said, you sit in here, I'll.

Speaker 2 (01:06:27):
Go type up a little public service.

Speaker 4 (01:06:28):
Now.

Speaker 10 (01:06:28):
The FCC has been on us to get some public
service announcements on the show. I said, let me go
type someth my brea quick, and you just put on
these headphones and read this for me on the microphone.

Speaker 22 (01:06:35):
Now, now some of you have heard we do this before,
Like we had some bankers in here one day and
we made him do it because it's a special sound
sinking thing you have alan you're you're you're in the bills.
You understand this. When you run a tape recorder, you
have like the playback head and the record head.

Speaker 1 (01:06:51):
Yeah.

Speaker 10 (01:06:51):
Yeah, And sometimes what you have to do is to
sync up your audio, you have to talk along with yourself,
and in order to keep yourself from sound like an idiot,
you have to have what's called a delay in your headphones.

Speaker 22 (01:07:02):
But if you take that off, see like you're talking
to the microphone, but you hear yourself like a quarter
of a second later in your headphones, and.

Speaker 7 (01:07:10):
It makes you sound kind of goofy.

Speaker 9 (01:07:12):
Yeah.

Speaker 10 (01:07:13):
So there's a lot of concentration, a real sense of professionalism.

Speaker 7 (01:07:16):
Y'all may not believe this, but we have that problem
on this show. Yeah, it'll happen, you know sometimes stuff
that didn't make sense.

Speaker 22 (01:07:23):
So anyway, so Randy sets him up, So sets down
at the microphone, says, here, please, you know, read these
public service announcements with that sink delay off.

Speaker 7 (01:07:31):
So let's all listen to him together, shall we?

Speaker 19 (01:07:34):
All right? Roll that tape?

Speaker 7 (01:07:35):
There?

Speaker 10 (01:07:35):
It is, okay, Donnie, just just read what's on the
script here and we'll use it like for a public
service announcement.

Speaker 1 (01:07:41):
Just just just go anytime you're ready.

Speaker 17 (01:07:44):
I'm please, Officer don I'm pressed in the venom of
my urgents, say you should die nine one one one.

Speaker 10 (01:07:54):
Maybe if you got like a little bit more of
a serious read on.

Speaker 8 (01:07:57):
It, try that.

Speaker 17 (01:07:58):
I'm police off, Sir Donnie Pressley. In case of an emergency,
you should dial nine one on one.

Speaker 2 (01:08:09):
I'll right once more, Donny, I think you're right now.

Speaker 17 (01:08:14):
I'm please, Officer Donnie Pressley. In case of an emergency,
you should die nine one one one.

Speaker 2 (01:08:26):
Maybe if you talked a little slower, try once more.

Speaker 1 (01:08:31):
I'm what.

Speaker 17 (01:08:34):
I'm pleae, Officer Donnie press in case of an emergency,
you should die now, one one one, Okay.

Speaker 1 (01:08:49):
Thank you very much, Donnie.

Speaker 2 (01:08:51):
Maybe if you went a little faster that I'm police
Officer don Presley.

Speaker 17 (01:08:58):
I'm Pleae Officer Donnie Press. In cases of an emergency,
you should die now one one.

Speaker 2 (01:09:09):
A little faster.

Speaker 7 (01:09:10):
I need a little faster.

Speaker 2 (01:09:11):
We gotta get it in under five seconds.

Speaker 17 (01:09:14):
I'm police Officer Donnie Press in case if an emergency
and you should die now one one.

Speaker 1 (01:09:25):
All right, says Yes, we're all walking home today. Yes,

(01:09:55):
it's the last few minutes we'll make show for your
Monday morning, May fifteenth.

Speaker 7 (01:10:00):
Been to take about it Today's Mike Show. Top ten
list number four in our continuing series Top ten phrases
you would not want people to see while reading your
obituary Number ten, drunken rampage number nine, LiPo suction mishap

(01:10:21):
number eight during an altercation with the restaurant's Chucky Cheese
mascot character. Number seven while attempting to retrieve his hat
from the fenced off area underneath the roller coaster. Number
six after bitch slapping Mike Tyson in the plane's first
class cabin. Number five while vandalizing the stor's bud light display.

(01:10:49):
Number four at a brothel in Nevada with former NBA
star Lamar Odom number three, crushed by the contents of
his wonderful Things give away storage Unit number two, any
use of the phrase he needed killing, and the worst

(01:11:12):
obituary phrase in lieu of flowers. The family requests gift
cards from the Cheesecake Factory.

Speaker 1 (01:11:25):
I think about three or four of them was aimed
at me.

Speaker 7 (01:11:29):
Bit boxes here all your favorites from four decades of
The Big Show ninety nine since each fifteen for nine
ninety nine. Buy them once, play him anywhere. Shop the
Big Box online right now at the Big Show dot Com.
The Big Show Warehouse chock full of JBMB goodies, T
shirts and hats and more. You can order some right
now called the Officer don at Presley, that guy on
the comfort phone at eight hundred four seven to one.

(01:11:52):
Stuff Let's do with job Boy, Billy Grillosauce and Carla Cook.
Find out right now online at BBQ Country dot Com.
Online services by Enemy dot count.

Speaker 1 (01:12:00):
I have a great resk in txcit Tomorrow night reading

Speaker 2 (01:12:05):
M HM