June 3, 2024 • 36 mins
Monday (pt 1 of 2): On today’s Late Riser’s Podcast,.. - We’re spotlighting our resident Superhero Married Man today - and we’ll feature the first three episodes that led to him becoming a regular feature.. - The Grumpy Old Man will let us in on why he hates television.. - REK swerves into your Monday lane.. - We fill a request for Tim Wilson’s “First Baptist Bar and Grill”.. - and we’ll have Mary Jane lay som deep thoughts on us on our way out..
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Good morning, and you got the Big show on the radio.
Speaker 2 (00:03):
More chance for you to win coming up after your
news wedther in sports.
Speaker 3 (00:07):
You come on me today because you know, no Sicilian
can refuse a request on the day of his daughter's wedding.
I shall grant your requests. Someday I may ask a
favor of you, maybe a haircut. Maybe I'll ask you
to lay down your life for me. Maybe I'll just
ask you to listen to John Boy and Billy on
the Big Show. Would you rather wake up where the
(00:29):
horse's heading or these two horses?
Speaker 4 (00:31):
Ask loving that on?
Speaker 2 (01:09):
Come on a brand new week, some brand new month,
brand new mix show on the radio.
Speaker 1 (01:19):
Hey, that looks pretty good, honey? Am I having good weekend?
Speaker 5 (01:22):
Nice?
Speaker 4 (01:23):
Nice?
Speaker 1 (01:25):
All right?
Speaker 2 (01:26):
It is National Leave the Office Early Day? Have you
just getting up? I made it to the office yet
you just got something to look forward to. It's National
Leave the Office Early Day.
Speaker 1 (01:37):
I was on a Monday. That's good.
Speaker 2 (01:39):
Today's repeat day, one of my stupid things Repeat day.
Speaker 1 (01:44):
And here's our favorite National egg Day.
Speaker 2 (01:49):
All right, my family, Have you are y'all all caught
up on eggs?
Speaker 1 (01:53):
Have I got everybody now?
Speaker 6 (01:55):
Yes?
Speaker 1 (01:55):
YEA good deal?
Speaker 7 (01:57):
Yeah?
Speaker 2 (01:57):
Man? It is just something about them on farm eggs
that are just so much better than the store balled.
Oh you all agree. I've been given like eggs to
my crew here.
Speaker 5 (02:09):
Several given. Yes, girls have been working harder.
Speaker 8 (02:13):
And until you did that, I had never had farm
fresh eggs. I had always bought the grocery store eggs.
And they really do taste better. Yoke is yellower, the
shell is harder.
Speaker 5 (02:24):
Eggs come out fluffier.
Speaker 1 (02:26):
Got that good taste.
Speaker 5 (02:30):
You know, there's no none of them still fighting. I'm
in good shape.
Speaker 1 (02:33):
Just take them to death.
Speaker 2 (02:36):
Over the weekends. She found one that started embryo. That
a little embryo there in it.
Speaker 1 (02:41):
You know you'll have it.
Speaker 5 (02:46):
You have that on your fresh jobs.
Speaker 1 (02:49):
It's all right.
Speaker 2 (02:50):
We'll celebrate National egg Day three days in this.
Speaker 1 (02:54):
You're saved up.
Speaker 2 (02:54):
We'll get our first prize pack out and get that
winning beginning for y'all. Big shows on the radio. Good morning,
Big shows on the radio. First prize pack this morning,
and let's see what we got. We have got a hat,
T shirt, tumbler and a twenty five dollars gas card
from our buds at low Tigers, where you can win
(03:16):
the trip of a lifetime to the eighty fourth Annual
Sturgis Motorcycle Rally, and accustom Harley Davidson Performance Bagger and
more stuff that you will not believe on these prize pack.
Check it out and see for yourself when you click
on the link at the Big Show dot com. All right,
three days in history where we get our categories. Twenty seventeen,
(03:39):
The Amazing World of Doctor Seuss Museum opened in Springfield, Massachusetts.
Speaker 1 (03:45):
Doctor Seuss, cat and hat. Yep he was.
Speaker 5 (03:48):
He was something green, eggs and ham. That's gonna be.
That must be a crazy museum, you know what.
Speaker 7 (03:54):
But he's decorated, all right.
Speaker 2 (03:56):
Twenty eighteen, a dead whale was found with seven seventeen
pounds of plastic in its stomach in song Ku Province, Thailand.
So a lot of plastics in the ocean. That still
But have you heard about all this? Okay, the green
energy deal where they're putting the propellers out in the ocean.
It's killing all the whales up north off the east coast,
(04:20):
Like about twenty have been beach dead wales. They will
not admit that's that has just happened since they put
those big turbine wind powered. Oh yes, yeah, yeah, you
know what else with the sonar and stuff, how just
messes them up? I mean you start messing the ecosystem
(04:41):
like that. Yeah, but don't worry.
Speaker 9 (04:44):
It worn't great, all right, I cents you're not a fan?
Speaker 1 (04:49):
No, not all right? Just move on to whales.
Speaker 2 (04:53):
Go to twenty nineteen to see jay Z named the
world's first billionaire rapper by Forbes magazine.
Speaker 1 (05:01):
Jay Z got it going on bro Man very popular.
Speaker 5 (05:07):
You know he's married to Beyonce too.
Speaker 1 (05:09):
Oh oh that'sn't one.
Speaker 5 (05:10):
Yeah, oh go, they still our couple.
Speaker 2 (05:12):
I thought she was been aflac and then he was
just had enough of her.
Speaker 5 (05:16):
Now that's j lo.
Speaker 2 (05:18):
Oh I'm getting mixed up his horse laughing at yeah,
I had My entertainment director is.
Speaker 5 (05:29):
A couple zeros ahead of j Lo.
Speaker 1 (05:33):
Oh right, well there you go.
Speaker 2 (05:34):
When there's our categories one hundred, big show is your
toll free line? Come on play out birds next. I
(06:05):
don't know, man, I got the Yonsey on the blocking
jy Lo on a corner, ben I Black about half
tired of it?
Speaker 5 (06:17):
Beyonce you're thinking of Beyonza?
Speaker 2 (06:18):
Jay Z billionaire rapper, mad Maxwell's wrong rap was wonderful.
Speaker 9 (06:26):
Settle down, Peopaul, We're gonna get off the lawn.
Speaker 2 (06:31):
I have a dall you to day's feature track from
the Big Show Box.
Speaker 1 (06:35):
As soon as you tell me, I'll tell them. Randy. Oh,
it's a secret, you man. It's Monday's the brand new
work week. We're honoring Mary Jane.
Speaker 2 (06:44):
Oh these thousand Mary Jane's so not picking a particular
cut because there's a bunch.
Speaker 9 (06:49):
Of women there. Yeah, when you search it, you'll find
Mary Jane.
Speaker 2 (06:53):
Hey Wards, Mary Jane at the Big Box, at the
Big show dot com.
Speaker 1 (06:59):
Blat the bar later Uppers, let's be uppers.
Speaker 10 (07:03):
It's the game that anyone can win, you know, friend,
John boy Billy to give you jokes.
Speaker 1 (07:16):
Fun should really.
Speaker 4 (07:17):
Be a lot of fun.
Speaker 10 (07:21):
Ups. Have a hurry up and guess time you have
the test tangle dig shots.
Speaker 2 (07:28):
That's say hey to Mark from Goldsboro, North Carolina.
Speaker 1 (07:33):
Home of Carl the Shells House.
Speaker 7 (07:36):
Shot what.
Speaker 9 (07:42):
She didn't know his name, so she faked it.
Speaker 1 (07:44):
She's making whale founds.
Speaker 2 (07:48):
That's the way they sound, right, boy, They ditched themselves.
Speaker 7 (07:54):
All right.
Speaker 1 (07:54):
Come on, let's get together here, Hey.
Speaker 2 (07:56):
Mark, I said Mark, Good morning, Mark, how are you one.
Speaker 11 (08:00):
I'm doing well. How'd you guys doing today?
Speaker 1 (08:03):
Very good?
Speaker 2 (08:04):
First contestant here and Jaggie tells me that you had
a birthday yesterday. Happy birthday.
Speaker 11 (08:11):
Well, thank you kindly.
Speaker 12 (08:13):
Right.
Speaker 2 (08:13):
Well let's uh well, let's see if you can earn
your birthday present.
Speaker 13 (08:17):
Here.
Speaker 1 (08:17):
Let's get you through these categories.
Speaker 2 (08:19):
You ready, I'll try five seconds. Just give us three
Doctor Seuss characters.
Speaker 1 (08:26):
Ready go the.
Speaker 11 (08:28):
Grant, the cat hat, lourat here you go.
Speaker 2 (08:32):
I'll wagons alright, Mark now, three things made out of plastic.
Speaker 1 (08:37):
Ready go, bottle chewing gum and water bottles and for
the win. Three rich people ready go.
Speaker 11 (08:47):
Let's say jay Z Donald trumping Oprah.
Speaker 5 (08:53):
Here you reach people.
Speaker 2 (08:56):
And Mark you are Richard big old Lord Tiger's pride
Pact including the gas card.
Speaker 1 (09:01):
Head over to Goldsborough for you, Thank.
Speaker 11 (09:04):
You, County. I won't give another shout for another friend
of mine. I give him one a while back. But
a hardy day for hardy day music man. I got
some CDs I'm sending y'all away, but he's got a
beautiful song. You got a list too, called Letter from
a Soldier. You gots need to check that song out.
Speaker 2 (09:20):
Well, all right, well, we will do that. Mark you
on trade up with Jackie right here, buddy, appreciate.
Speaker 11 (09:25):
You, okay, sure, we'll thank you. You guys have a good
We love you, John.
Speaker 1 (09:29):
Boyd God, my boy, love you. Hang on.
Speaker 2 (09:39):
It's the mottome of the hour. The top of you,
a new We ready to kick off a married man Monday.
It's gonna be good morning. Let's big sew the radio.
(10:22):
I know we do too. Love his married man Monday's
been here from y'all. So we got you one today,
married man the early years.
Speaker 1 (10:30):
We're gonna start.
Speaker 2 (10:31):
Off with the cool married man themes we did recently
here on this married man Monday hit it.
Speaker 1 (11:14):
Married man.
Speaker 14 (11:16):
Married man drives around in a mini van, got a wife,
andsome kids, his whole ef songs.
Speaker 2 (11:24):
Kids.
Speaker 6 (11:24):
Hey, there there goes a married man.
Speaker 14 (11:30):
How's he field listened to?
Speaker 15 (11:32):
This?
Speaker 14 (11:33):
Poor guy's really screwed, hanging on by thread, quarter.
Speaker 1 (11:38):
Milk, loaf of bread?
Speaker 14 (11:39):
Hey, fred, ain't that the married man? Gotta big gas.
Girl buys his clothes at the gap.
Speaker 12 (11:50):
And he's just about had love about this craft married man,
married man, friendly neighborhood married man.
Speaker 14 (12:00):
When he's home, he's ignored.
Speaker 4 (12:03):
Maybe that's why he's so bored.
Speaker 16 (12:05):
O lord, it's hard for a married man.
Speaker 10 (12:41):
You'll work hard every day till the day that he's dead.
Speaker 1 (12:46):
He wants crime marry you.
Speaker 10 (12:49):
He'll just squeeze on your head.
Speaker 14 (12:52):
Married man, married man, friendly neighborhood, married man life for him,
has no singing. Wife won't let him do things. She says, it's.
Speaker 13 (13:04):
About sad, grow up, weary, his screw up.
Speaker 6 (13:16):
You fine married man.
Speaker 2 (14:01):
Good morning, a big show on the radio about twenty
minutes away.
Speaker 1 (14:05):
In episode one of married Man The Early Years.
Speaker 17 (14:09):
And Now Action, Hello friends, you're old help Britbourne here
and welcome to another sphincter puckering episode of John Boy
and Billy Playhouse.
Speaker 4 (14:21):
This week getting hitched.
Speaker 7 (14:23):
As our story opens, Ricky b Sharp and his lovely
wife Lucy are waiting for a wedding ceremony to begin.
Speaker 18 (14:30):
Bad look at this crowd, you'd think killer Base was.
Speaker 5 (14:34):
Here or something.
Speaker 7 (14:36):
Well, Lucy, it ain't every day that mister runtapped Populus's
only daughter gets hitched.
Speaker 18 (14:41):
Taking a good look at her, I can't believe anyone
would bury her.
Speaker 7 (14:45):
Yeah, I see what you mean. From a nick down
She's like Pamela Anderson from a neck up. She's Louis Anderson.
Speaker 18 (14:54):
And look at him. This guy looks like one of
the dag Chippindalees. This guy to be for the buddy.
It's gotta lucy, buddy, Buddy, buddy, you.
Speaker 7 (15:07):
Can't possibly understand the romantic piccadillos of today's young people.
I mean, look at us. Your daddy tried to talk
you out of marrying me.
Speaker 1 (15:15):
Said I was a loser, said I never minded.
Speaker 7 (15:18):
Anything, said it was the biggest mistake of your life.
Speaker 1 (15:20):
And here I am today.
Speaker 7 (15:22):
Dophins most beloved fast food mascot.
Speaker 18 (15:25):
Daddy was a real nostro doobis?
Speaker 7 (15:28):
Was it a another little t he from miss heath.
Speaker 18 (15:31):
Hall Lord look at him like like mismatched salt pepper shakers.
I like, what the world can he said her?
Speaker 7 (15:41):
Are you serious, Lucy? Look at that rack? What Nordstrom
wishes they had a rack like that man that fought
and died for access to walm Digitus mammalia ding dongs
like that caliber?
Speaker 18 (15:54):
Really? Yeah, well, mark my words, he's gonna put a
bag on her head. Okay, you serve for that smoking
hot body, and then he's going to take her. Buddy
and babus.
Speaker 7 (16:06):
Wait to see the future, Miss Cleo. Truth is, mister
run to Populus has already prepared for any future Shenanigans
likewood Well, for one thing, the day they got engaged,
he made sign one of them, which you call pre nips.
Speaker 18 (16:21):
You made pre nups.
Speaker 7 (16:22):
Nope, pre nips. He had to sign up before he
could have Adam son of a.
Speaker 18 (16:29):
Son of.
Speaker 7 (16:36):
Right on cue, we hope to enjoyed John Boy and
Billy playhouse. Here comes Abride. Notice them top two buttons
and done years. Welcome. Tune in next time when we'll
hear the flat chested bridesmaid.
Speaker 2 (16:51):
Say, Hey, big man, let me hold a dollar, this
big show on your radio.
Speaker 1 (16:59):
Thanks for joining us this morning.
Speaker 19 (17:02):
Oh I love all those five big crown radio Man,
Water Winch, Cousin, Brusie Walkman, Jack y'all boy and Belly
a job boy.
Speaker 9 (17:19):
Belly had only.
Speaker 20 (17:21):
Two white men. Never made me more. Whoa, I feel
so varnable. Sile your lift back. We walk over for
your lift back. Wow, good morning, it's to make show
(18:13):
on the radio. I'm always wonderful thing.
Speaker 2 (18:15):
Giveaway The Fountain Racing Team hat autographed by Reggie Fountain.
I want to say to pick quick our boat races
where you go to Jackson, Tennessee and go south a
little bit.
Speaker 1 (18:28):
Man, there's fun stuff. Had all the buzzs put it
out there too.
Speaker 2 (18:34):
Here fifty Ford that has before that we had on
the dull hub.
Speaker 1 (18:38):
Fishing boat man.
Speaker 2 (18:40):
There's a lot of a lot of memories with that hat,
and that will explain the stains.
Speaker 9 (18:47):
None of them are your memories, dear listener.
Speaker 1 (18:50):
But no, Yeah, it looked like something was spilt on the.
Speaker 2 (18:57):
Side of it.
Speaker 5 (18:58):
I think tho for you dropped into something.
Speaker 1 (19:01):
Yeah, they ad first was that the day.
Speaker 9 (19:03):
They had the bobbing for apples competition.
Speaker 5 (19:06):
I mean, those books do go fast. It may have
flew off your head for you.
Speaker 1 (19:09):
Yes, several times.
Speaker 2 (19:10):
I lost many a pair of sunglasses as well, But
that's another story.
Speaker 9 (19:15):
If you want me to send it to Raleigh and
have the boys in the lab analysis.
Speaker 1 (19:18):
Are it looks like it's been washed, though I disagree.
Speaker 5 (19:24):
I'm not gonna smell it. You smell.
Speaker 1 (19:28):
Jagg it out.
Speaker 2 (19:29):
They can be yours right there at the Big Show
dot com. Good morning, got the Big show on the radio.
Married Man the early years. Yes, he's coming up next.
If you just hang right there, we'll get right and
then we're gonna play john Boy Jeopardy. That's right, you
(19:49):
can win a red Maax prize pack.
Speaker 12 (19:51):
You know.
Speaker 2 (19:52):
Redmax makes the best trimmers and floors and commercial zero
turned moors with a two year unlimited hour warranty, Kawasaki
engines and heavy Dude, they fabricated back bow like a
pro with red Max.
Speaker 1 (20:08):
Hang out in minutes. Right now, let's get a married
man wanted to going.
Speaker 15 (20:22):
My redman.
Speaker 21 (20:23):
My ridman drives around in a minivan, got a wife
and some kids. His whole life's on the skids. Hey,
there there goes to maried man.
Speaker 7 (20:36):
House.
Speaker 21 (20:37):
He feel Listen, dude, this poor guy's really screwed hanging on.
Speaker 1 (20:42):
Buy a bread cord of milk, loaf of bread. Hey,
there there.
Speaker 21 (20:47):
Goes for married man, got a big gas grill, buys
his clothes at the gap, and he's just about having on.
Speaker 10 (20:58):
Food this car.
Speaker 21 (21:00):
Married man, married man, friendly neighborhood, married man.
Speaker 1 (21:04):
My marian has nohing life. Will let him do what
the she says, it's about timing groove.
Speaker 15 (21:12):
Well, ma, there's a screw.
Speaker 1 (21:14):
Well you'll find the married man.
Speaker 22 (21:18):
Last time married man encountered as all Powell College buddy
who suggested our hero have a little fun by flirting
with the attractive young lady at the grocery store check
out Kata. Our hero rose to the occasion in his
patented married man style.
Speaker 23 (21:32):
Ooh married, I'm happily married. I've never cheated on my
wife in my entire life. I don't intend to start now.
I'm married, I tell you married.
Speaker 22 (21:42):
Excuse me, I just remembered a couple of things I
forgot to get.
Speaker 1 (21:45):
Hell, well, very smooth. You were right, You've still got it.
Speaker 22 (21:51):
Hey, i may be a costume crusader, but I'm still
a human being.
Speaker 1 (21:56):
She tempted me with her feminine wilds. All she said
was paper or plastic.
Speaker 23 (22:01):
Yeah, well, well with these women today, who knows what
that might mean.
Speaker 24 (22:03):
Not come on, admit it, marry man, you've lost your touch.
Your wife runs your life, man, it happens. It doesn't
mean your life is over. It just means it's not
that interesting anymore.
Speaker 6 (22:16):
That's not true.
Speaker 22 (22:16):
I run my own life.
Speaker 1 (22:18):
I don't let women push me around. Yeah right, I'll
prove it.
Speaker 23 (22:21):
I'll go right back over there to that register right
now and check out, and then I'm gonna go back home.
Speaker 1 (22:27):
And what's the ball game. Yeah, that's it. I'm a man,
I spell.
Speaker 23 (22:32):
M a child and nah, watch me work, mister skeptic.
Speaker 9 (22:39):
Hi find everything you needed?
Speaker 1 (22:41):
Oh yeah, sorry about that pathetic outburst a minute ago.
Speaker 15 (22:45):
Hm.
Speaker 16 (22:46):
Did you see how much these were?
Speaker 5 (22:48):
They don't have a price.
Speaker 15 (22:49):
No, but I'll be glad to walk over and check
for you.
Speaker 5 (22:52):
Oh that's all right, I can check for you.
Speaker 1 (22:54):
Oh, no problem.
Speaker 23 (22:55):
I can be there and back in a flash.
Speaker 7 (22:56):
Really no, No, that's all the way in the back
of the store.
Speaker 1 (22:59):
I'll get somebody to run back there for you.
Speaker 10 (23:02):
Christ check twelve pack camp Haax's plushble super maxy open.
Speaker 5 (23:06):
Pads with Wingey's for the guy in the cave right here, sir?
Speaker 9 (23:11):
Anything wrong?
Speaker 19 (23:12):
Oh?
Speaker 22 (23:13):
I was just watching what passes for my life flash
before my eyes. Well, married man be able to survive
the greatest humiliation of his costume career. And that thing
with the ballgame was he just blowing smoke? That too, answers.
In our next sphincter titaning adventure, Same married Time, Same
married channel, there's a school you'll.
Speaker 10 (23:36):
Find the married mane.
Speaker 2 (23:40):
Years out all another another episode coming up about hour.
Speaker 1 (23:46):
Hi, let's jump in here and play john Boy Jeopardy.
Speaker 2 (23:50):
According to Parenting Magazine, this is the most expensive sport
for American kids to participate in.
Speaker 5 (24:00):
What is fortnight?
Speaker 1 (24:02):
Fortnight? Oh yeah, no, that's relatively cheap.
Speaker 5 (24:07):
That's funny the people that are younger than you.
Speaker 2 (24:11):
What y'all got the most expensive sport for kids? One
eight hundred Big Show you told free line, Come on
play next.
Speaker 1 (24:43):
Good Monday morning. There's a big show on the radio
for your June third.
Speaker 2 (24:48):
Today's feature track for the Big Show bit Box Deep
Thoughts with Mary Jane turns for keywords, Mary Jane, when
you hit the box at the Big Show.
Speaker 1 (24:56):
Dot com there right now, let's play yes.
Speaker 25 (25:01):
Five Across America, it's John Boyd Jeopardy and now a
man who says he had to leave the best job
he ever had because of something his boss said.
Speaker 1 (25:13):
It was you're fired, peas John.
Speaker 2 (25:21):
As I hated Burrow out of Sandersville, Georgia. Good morning, Burrow,
Good morning, good morning body all right man, Tennessee. Fat
Boy's dad was named Burrow. He's one that owned the
Oak Grove.
Speaker 1 (25:34):
The bar there. Jer Lee Lewis put his head through
the ceiling.
Speaker 9 (25:37):
The only thing I ever known about.
Speaker 2 (25:38):
His dad, Ali Burrow you got the first shot at
John Bordjevity this morning. According to Parenting Magazine, this is
the most expensive sport for American kids to participate in.
Speaker 24 (25:54):
How about a questrian you know, like the horse horse
riding stuff?
Speaker 1 (25:57):
Horse horse riding a question. Well, let's see.
Speaker 11 (26:04):
That right, and.
Speaker 2 (26:09):
I hear it's no dropping the bucket for wives either.
Don't get cheaper. Something about girls and them horses that
I'm talking about? Well, burrow, good work, buddy, bego, Red
Max Prize pack is head down to Sandersville for you.
Speaker 1 (26:29):
All right now, thank y'all, y'all have a good day.
Thank you buddy too. Alright, then I'll run down the
list here in a second.
Speaker 6 (26:36):
H y'all.
Speaker 2 (26:38):
All right here before we get the news there in
questrian sports are looking to live their horses. Yes, the
most expensive sport for kids or any human for that matter,
we determined right. Ice hockey is second. I wouldn't have
to deal with that growing up in the South. Ice hockey, fencing,
you know, you want to build the outfit.
Speaker 1 (26:57):
And the swords. Yeah, lessons skiing and snowboarding, No, that
makes sense.
Speaker 5 (27:03):
Lift tickets.
Speaker 2 (27:04):
The most expensive for kids sports lacrosse, gymnastics, competitive cheerleading,
competitive dance, golf, figure skating. A lot of this is
travel sports.
Speaker 1 (27:16):
When I get real good at.
Speaker 2 (27:17):
It, you know, tool and then all the way through tennis, tackle, football,
is twelve soccer, basketball, swimming, baseball, martial arts, wrestling, cycling,
cross country.
Speaker 5 (27:30):
Cross country.
Speaker 1 (27:32):
Gotta buy some new shorts, ransom shoes. That's about it.
Speaker 9 (27:37):
Run it so, Beanie Baby collecting that didn't make.
Speaker 1 (27:39):
The Listeno execut to keep hoping.
Speaker 7 (28:11):
This is the award winning John Boy and Billy Big Show,
the South's number one export.
Speaker 15 (28:33):
It's a marginal day in the neighborhood. If people like
you for a neighbor, won't you move out? Won't you
move out? Hello, boys and girls. Mister Rayford hare glad
to be able to add a little bit of class
to this otherwise juvenile redneck yuckfest and help straighten out
the new generation of crumb crutchers. Today's adventure day in
(28:57):
mister Rayford's neighborhood. Our special game this little Tommy Vaughn. Well, Tommy,
how are you enjoying adventure days so far?
Speaker 1 (29:04):
It's really neat?
Speaker 9 (29:05):
Mister Rayford.
Speaker 26 (29:06):
What a great idea of putting all those old abandoned
refrigerators with clubhouse painted on them in your backyard. I
haven't seen my brother Eddie in the last few minutes,
So do you think you could help me find him?
Speaker 15 (29:16):
Well, we'll talk about that later. You know, Tommy, I
thought you were coming along on the road to curmudgeon hood.
You know, I was on that cynical road back when
you were just a drunken glaze in your father's eye.
It doesn't just happen. You have to work at it.
It's a twenty four hour a day job. You can't
just take an occasional stab at it. You've got to
make it your life I have. You've got to decide
(29:37):
are you going to be a good head or a
butt head?
Speaker 26 (29:41):
I know I've shown patience and compassion in the past,
but I want to be a butt head.
Speaker 15 (29:46):
Good, good, good. You're a fine boy, Bud. With a
little work, we can take care of that. You've got
to surround yourself with people of like mind, people who
think exactly like you do, people you can call a pal.
Speaker 1 (29:58):
Are you my pal, Tommy, Yes, sir, I'm your pal.
Speaker 18 (30:02):
Good boy.
Speaker 15 (30:04):
How about a nice big glass of bi low colum.
Speaker 26 (30:07):
Yeah, that'd be great. I really got thirsty out there
dodging all those bear tracks.
Speaker 15 (30:12):
Ah yes, And remember you can't fall in the trap
of saying what you think people want to hear. Speak
your mind down the consequences. Be a leader, be a curmudgeon,
be a yeah yeah butt head.
Speaker 1 (30:24):
I got it, I got it.
Speaker 7 (30:25):
Can I go now?
Speaker 1 (30:26):
I hate being a latchkey child.
Speaker 15 (30:28):
Well, if your mother would quit her job and stay
home like all women should, the world wouldn't be so
screwed up.
Speaker 1 (30:34):
Tell her, I said, give it up.
Speaker 15 (30:36):
She can't have it all tomorrow And mister Rayford's neighborhood
leaf blowers modern convenience or just another fiendish attempt to
annoy me personally till then get out of my yard,
stay indoors, and if your parents go out to eat,
pretend your sick, stay home and quit ruining my life
till then this is mister Rayford saying, we're off at
(31:01):
good I don all hold the little bastards off for
a while.
Speaker 1 (31:05):
Shown boy and.
Speaker 10 (31:06):
Billy ya, Good morning radio?
Speaker 1 (31:16):
Done right, Good morning. That's a big shaw on the radio.
Speaker 4 (31:48):
And here we go, Oh gobbledy snaffle.
Speaker 7 (31:54):
I'm old and I hate everything, especially television. Back in
my day, we didn't have no fancy schmancy full color,
high definition, space saving flint screen gizmo with a fifty
inch picture and four hundred channels on twenty four hours
(32:16):
a day. We had a plain wooden box with a
teeny round screen so small you could only watch it
one eye at a time. He was covered with five
thousand knobs, only two of which worked on off in volume.
(32:36):
The rest of the knobs were there to keep us
busy because we were too damn pig ignorant to know
there weren't no real TV shows yet. The TV was
so dad blame big we had to build the rest
of the house around it. It took up so much
room that we younguns had to sleep out back with
the hogs, and they'd eat your toes and fingers while
(33:00):
you slipped. But at least you managed to stay warm
under that nice cozy blank at a steam and big manure.
And then, if you are lucky, every once in a while,
some smart ass would broadcast a live picture.
Speaker 1 (33:20):
Of a stuffed animal. Since there weren't no sound, we.
Speaker 7 (33:24):
Didn't know if we'd won a prize or erase of
stuffed bunnies. We're taking over the world. We were dumb
as mudd, and that's the way we liked it. We'd
gather around that one inch square screen stare at it
for hours on end, fumbling with knobs, drooling and scratching
our butts.
Speaker 1 (33:44):
With no fingers, going blind one eye at a.
Speaker 4 (33:47):
Time, slip slappity slew.
Speaker 7 (33:49):
Look at us, We're a bunch of tolless, fingerless crapstick
and hiltily cyclops. All hail the bunny Man. I can't
wait till someone invinced the Jerry Springer show.
Speaker 1 (34:06):
Howdy Do the Digly Day? And we liked it.
Speaker 7 (34:14):
And we didn't have no sitcoms to break no day.
Speaker 1 (34:18):
If we wanted a good laugh, we didn't have.
Speaker 7 (34:20):
Any Andy and Bonnie and Jerry and Cramer and Raws
and Phoebe.
Speaker 1 (34:25):
To make sport up. We had to go all the
way to.
Speaker 7 (34:29):
The next county where this bunch of slavic squad has lived,
and we'd single out Boris to jabber and freak. With
his unborn twins lower half growing out of his stomach.
We'd strip his shirt off and chase him with handfuls
of stinging nettles. He hopped through the high weeds, running
for his life, and that creepy little torso with kikets
(34:52):
with little legs, and he'd looked like a big cricket
man jumping through the field and we'd all laugh, and
because that's funny right there. I don't care who you are.
And if we wanted a reality show, we'd make our own,
like who watched her Lighter Fart? We'd gorge ourselves on
(35:16):
raw broccoli and pickled pigs feet, and then we'd all
gather around in a big circle and start pooting into
the campfire waiting for that one big super fart that
would barbecue all your kid in a ball of blue flame.
And even if you're won, you still wound up sending
all the hair off your keysta and getting second degree
burns all.
Speaker 1 (35:35):
Over your private parts.
Speaker 4 (35:37):
We'll boop boop the doodle the bangle.
Speaker 7 (35:42):
We're freak chasing kinscorch and xenophobes, sitting around on our
French fried butt, smeller like burnt hair.
Speaker 1 (35:49):
Which way to the Wienie roads?
Speaker 4 (35:51):
Oh glorious glorious morning television. Ah flugles, all.
Speaker 1 (36:05):
Wait, you up my list?
Speaker 27 (36:07):
No hot ve herd, it's hot, I low ho hond
Honda gun. Hey, everyone knows that's laud list is laud list,
is let listen, My god, horaduar Fix's lut listen. It's
left list.
Speaker 1 (36:19):
Hop honey is honahah gone. I'm coming up every you
no I know, Oh what
Speaker 10 (36:34):
M
Good morning, and you got the Big show on the radio.
Speaker 2 (00:03):
More chance for you to win coming up after your
news wedther in sports.
Speaker 3 (00:07):
You come on me today because you know, no Sicilian
can refuse a request on the day of his daughter's wedding.
I shall grant your requests. Someday I may ask a
favor of you, maybe a haircut. Maybe I'll ask you
to lay down your life for me. Maybe I'll just
ask you to listen to John Boy and Billy on
the Big Show. Would you rather wake up where the
(00:29):
horse's heading or these two horses?
Speaker 4 (00:31):
Ask loving that on?
Speaker 2 (01:09):
Come on a brand new week, some brand new month,
brand new mix show on the radio.
Speaker 1 (01:19):
Hey, that looks pretty good, honey? Am I having good weekend?
Speaker 5 (01:22):
Nice?
Speaker 4 (01:23):
Nice?
Speaker 1 (01:25):
All right?
Speaker 2 (01:26):
It is National Leave the Office Early Day? Have you
just getting up? I made it to the office yet
you just got something to look forward to. It's National
Leave the Office Early Day.
Speaker 1 (01:37):
I was on a Monday. That's good.
Speaker 2 (01:39):
Today's repeat day, one of my stupid things Repeat day.
Speaker 1 (01:44):
And here's our favorite National egg Day.
Speaker 2 (01:49):
All right, my family, Have you are y'all all caught
up on eggs?
Speaker 1 (01:53):
Have I got everybody now?
Speaker 6 (01:55):
Yes?
Speaker 1 (01:55):
YEA good deal?
Speaker 7 (01:57):
Yeah?
Speaker 2 (01:57):
Man? It is just something about them on farm eggs
that are just so much better than the store balled.
Oh you all agree. I've been given like eggs to
my crew here.
Speaker 5 (02:09):
Several given. Yes, girls have been working harder.
Speaker 8 (02:13):
And until you did that, I had never had farm
fresh eggs. I had always bought the grocery store eggs.
And they really do taste better. Yoke is yellower, the
shell is harder.
Speaker 5 (02:24):
Eggs come out fluffier.
Speaker 1 (02:26):
Got that good taste.
Speaker 5 (02:30):
You know, there's no none of them still fighting. I'm
in good shape.
Speaker 1 (02:33):
Just take them to death.
Speaker 2 (02:36):
Over the weekends. She found one that started embryo. That
a little embryo there in it.
Speaker 1 (02:41):
You know you'll have it.
Speaker 5 (02:46):
You have that on your fresh jobs.
Speaker 1 (02:49):
It's all right.
Speaker 2 (02:50):
We'll celebrate National egg Day three days in this.
Speaker 1 (02:54):
You're saved up.
Speaker 2 (02:54):
We'll get our first prize pack out and get that
winning beginning for y'all. Big shows on the radio. Good morning,
Big shows on the radio. First prize pack this morning,
and let's see what we got. We have got a hat,
T shirt, tumbler and a twenty five dollars gas card
from our buds at low Tigers, where you can win
(03:16):
the trip of a lifetime to the eighty fourth Annual
Sturgis Motorcycle Rally, and accustom Harley Davidson Performance Bagger and
more stuff that you will not believe on these prize pack.
Check it out and see for yourself when you click
on the link at the Big Show dot com. All right,
three days in history where we get our categories. Twenty seventeen,
(03:39):
The Amazing World of Doctor Seuss Museum opened in Springfield, Massachusetts.
Speaker 1 (03:45):
Doctor Seuss, cat and hat. Yep he was.
Speaker 5 (03:48):
He was something green, eggs and ham. That's gonna be.
That must be a crazy museum, you know what.
Speaker 7 (03:54):
But he's decorated, all right.
Speaker 2 (03:56):
Twenty eighteen, a dead whale was found with seven seventeen
pounds of plastic in its stomach in song Ku Province, Thailand.
So a lot of plastics in the ocean. That still
But have you heard about all this? Okay, the green
energy deal where they're putting the propellers out in the ocean.
It's killing all the whales up north off the east coast,
(04:20):
Like about twenty have been beach dead wales. They will
not admit that's that has just happened since they put
those big turbine wind powered. Oh yes, yeah, yeah, you
know what else with the sonar and stuff, how just
messes them up? I mean you start messing the ecosystem
(04:41):
like that. Yeah, but don't worry.
Speaker 9 (04:44):
It worn't great, all right, I cents you're not a fan?
Speaker 1 (04:49):
No, not all right? Just move on to whales.
Speaker 2 (04:53):
Go to twenty nineteen to see jay Z named the
world's first billionaire rapper by Forbes magazine.
Speaker 1 (05:01):
Jay Z got it going on bro Man very popular.
Speaker 5 (05:07):
You know he's married to Beyonce too.
Speaker 1 (05:09):
Oh oh that'sn't one.
Speaker 5 (05:10):
Yeah, oh go, they still our couple.
Speaker 2 (05:12):
I thought she was been aflac and then he was
just had enough of her.
Speaker 5 (05:16):
Now that's j lo.
Speaker 2 (05:18):
Oh I'm getting mixed up his horse laughing at yeah,
I had My entertainment director is.
Speaker 5 (05:29):
A couple zeros ahead of j Lo.
Speaker 1 (05:33):
Oh right, well there you go.
Speaker 2 (05:34):
When there's our categories one hundred, big show is your
toll free line? Come on play out birds next. I
(06:05):
don't know, man, I got the Yonsey on the blocking
jy Lo on a corner, ben I Black about half
tired of it?
Speaker 5 (06:17):
Beyonce you're thinking of Beyonza?
Speaker 2 (06:18):
Jay Z billionaire rapper, mad Maxwell's wrong rap was wonderful.
Speaker 9 (06:26):
Settle down, Peopaul, We're gonna get off the lawn.
Speaker 2 (06:31):
I have a dall you to day's feature track from
the Big Show Box.
Speaker 1 (06:35):
As soon as you tell me, I'll tell them. Randy. Oh,
it's a secret, you man. It's Monday's the brand new
work week. We're honoring Mary Jane.
Speaker 2 (06:44):
Oh these thousand Mary Jane's so not picking a particular
cut because there's a bunch.
Speaker 9 (06:49):
Of women there. Yeah, when you search it, you'll find
Mary Jane.
Speaker 2 (06:53):
Hey Wards, Mary Jane at the Big Box, at the
Big show dot com.
Speaker 1 (06:59):
Blat the bar later Uppers, let's be uppers.
Speaker 10 (07:03):
It's the game that anyone can win, you know, friend,
John boy Billy to give you jokes.
Speaker 1 (07:16):
Fun should really.
Speaker 4 (07:17):
Be a lot of fun.
Speaker 10 (07:21):
Ups. Have a hurry up and guess time you have
the test tangle dig shots.
Speaker 2 (07:28):
That's say hey to Mark from Goldsboro, North Carolina.
Speaker 1 (07:33):
Home of Carl the Shells House.
Speaker 7 (07:36):
Shot what.
Speaker 9 (07:42):
She didn't know his name, so she faked it.
Speaker 1 (07:44):
She's making whale founds.
Speaker 2 (07:48):
That's the way they sound, right, boy, They ditched themselves.
Speaker 7 (07:54):
All right.
Speaker 1 (07:54):
Come on, let's get together here, Hey.
Speaker 2 (07:56):
Mark, I said Mark, Good morning, Mark, how are you one.
Speaker 11 (08:00):
I'm doing well. How'd you guys doing today?
Speaker 1 (08:03):
Very good?
Speaker 2 (08:04):
First contestant here and Jaggie tells me that you had
a birthday yesterday. Happy birthday.
Speaker 11 (08:11):
Well, thank you kindly.
Speaker 12 (08:13):
Right.
Speaker 2 (08:13):
Well let's uh well, let's see if you can earn
your birthday present.
Speaker 13 (08:17):
Here.
Speaker 1 (08:17):
Let's get you through these categories.
Speaker 2 (08:19):
You ready, I'll try five seconds. Just give us three
Doctor Seuss characters.
Speaker 1 (08:26):
Ready go the.
Speaker 11 (08:28):
Grant, the cat hat, lourat here you go.
Speaker 2 (08:32):
I'll wagons alright, Mark now, three things made out of plastic.
Speaker 1 (08:37):
Ready go, bottle chewing gum and water bottles and for
the win. Three rich people ready go.
Speaker 11 (08:47):
Let's say jay Z Donald trumping Oprah.
Speaker 5 (08:53):
Here you reach people.
Speaker 2 (08:56):
And Mark you are Richard big old Lord Tiger's pride
Pact including the gas card.
Speaker 1 (09:01):
Head over to Goldsborough for you, Thank.
Speaker 11 (09:04):
You, County. I won't give another shout for another friend
of mine. I give him one a while back. But
a hardy day for hardy day music man. I got
some CDs I'm sending y'all away, but he's got a
beautiful song. You got a list too, called Letter from
a Soldier. You gots need to check that song out.
Speaker 2 (09:20):
Well, all right, well, we will do that. Mark you
on trade up with Jackie right here, buddy, appreciate.
Speaker 11 (09:25):
You, okay, sure, we'll thank you. You guys have a good
We love you, John.
Speaker 1 (09:29):
Boyd God, my boy, love you. Hang on.
Speaker 2 (09:39):
It's the mottome of the hour. The top of you,
a new We ready to kick off a married man Monday.
It's gonna be good morning. Let's big sew the radio.
(10:22):
I know we do too. Love his married man Monday's
been here from y'all. So we got you one today,
married man the early years.
Speaker 1 (10:30):
We're gonna start.
Speaker 2 (10:31):
Off with the cool married man themes we did recently
here on this married man Monday hit it.
Speaker 1 (11:14):
Married man.
Speaker 14 (11:16):
Married man drives around in a mini van, got a wife,
andsome kids, his whole ef songs.
Speaker 2 (11:24):
Kids.
Speaker 6 (11:24):
Hey, there there goes a married man.
Speaker 14 (11:30):
How's he field listened to?
Speaker 15 (11:32):
This?
Speaker 14 (11:33):
Poor guy's really screwed, hanging on by thread, quarter.
Speaker 1 (11:38):
Milk, loaf of bread?
Speaker 14 (11:39):
Hey, fred, ain't that the married man? Gotta big gas.
Girl buys his clothes at the gap.
Speaker 12 (11:50):
And he's just about had love about this craft married man,
married man, friendly neighborhood married man.
Speaker 14 (12:00):
When he's home, he's ignored.
Speaker 4 (12:03):
Maybe that's why he's so bored.
Speaker 16 (12:05):
O lord, it's hard for a married man.
Speaker 10 (12:41):
You'll work hard every day till the day that he's dead.
Speaker 1 (12:46):
He wants crime marry you.
Speaker 10 (12:49):
He'll just squeeze on your head.
Speaker 14 (12:52):
Married man, married man, friendly neighborhood, married man life for him,
has no singing. Wife won't let him do things. She says, it's.
Speaker 13 (13:04):
About sad, grow up, weary, his screw up.
Speaker 6 (13:16):
You fine married man.
Speaker 2 (14:01):
Good morning, a big show on the radio about twenty
minutes away.
Speaker 1 (14:05):
In episode one of married Man The Early Years.
Speaker 17 (14:09):
And Now Action, Hello friends, you're old help Britbourne here
and welcome to another sphincter puckering episode of John Boy
and Billy Playhouse.
Speaker 4 (14:21):
This week getting hitched.
Speaker 7 (14:23):
As our story opens, Ricky b Sharp and his lovely
wife Lucy are waiting for a wedding ceremony to begin.
Speaker 18 (14:30):
Bad look at this crowd, you'd think killer Base was.
Speaker 5 (14:34):
Here or something.
Speaker 7 (14:36):
Well, Lucy, it ain't every day that mister runtapped Populus's
only daughter gets hitched.
Speaker 18 (14:41):
Taking a good look at her, I can't believe anyone
would bury her.
Speaker 7 (14:45):
Yeah, I see what you mean. From a nick down
She's like Pamela Anderson from a neck up. She's Louis Anderson.
Speaker 18 (14:54):
And look at him. This guy looks like one of
the dag Chippindalees. This guy to be for the buddy.
It's gotta lucy, buddy, Buddy, buddy, you.
Speaker 7 (15:07):
Can't possibly understand the romantic piccadillos of today's young people.
I mean, look at us. Your daddy tried to talk
you out of marrying me.
Speaker 1 (15:15):
Said I was a loser, said I never minded.
Speaker 7 (15:18):
Anything, said it was the biggest mistake of your life.
Speaker 1 (15:20):
And here I am today.
Speaker 7 (15:22):
Dophins most beloved fast food mascot.
Speaker 18 (15:25):
Daddy was a real nostro doobis?
Speaker 7 (15:28):
Was it a another little t he from miss heath.
Speaker 18 (15:31):
Hall Lord look at him like like mismatched salt pepper shakers.
I like, what the world can he said her?
Speaker 7 (15:41):
Are you serious, Lucy? Look at that rack? What Nordstrom
wishes they had a rack like that man that fought
and died for access to walm Digitus mammalia ding dongs
like that caliber?
Speaker 18 (15:54):
Really? Yeah, well, mark my words, he's gonna put a
bag on her head. Okay, you serve for that smoking
hot body, and then he's going to take her. Buddy
and babus.
Speaker 7 (16:06):
Wait to see the future, Miss Cleo. Truth is, mister
run to Populus has already prepared for any future Shenanigans
likewood Well, for one thing, the day they got engaged,
he made sign one of them, which you call pre nips.
Speaker 18 (16:21):
You made pre nups.
Speaker 7 (16:22):
Nope, pre nips. He had to sign up before he
could have Adam son of a.
Speaker 18 (16:29):
Son of.
Speaker 7 (16:36):
Right on cue, we hope to enjoyed John Boy and
Billy playhouse. Here comes Abride. Notice them top two buttons
and done years. Welcome. Tune in next time when we'll
hear the flat chested bridesmaid.
Speaker 2 (16:51):
Say, Hey, big man, let me hold a dollar, this
big show on your radio.
Speaker 1 (16:59):
Thanks for joining us this morning.
Speaker 19 (17:02):
Oh I love all those five big crown radio Man,
Water Winch, Cousin, Brusie Walkman, Jack y'all boy and Belly
a job boy.
Speaker 9 (17:19):
Belly had only.
Speaker 20 (17:21):
Two white men. Never made me more. Whoa, I feel
so varnable. Sile your lift back. We walk over for
your lift back. Wow, good morning, it's to make show
(18:13):
on the radio. I'm always wonderful thing.
Speaker 2 (18:15):
Giveaway The Fountain Racing Team hat autographed by Reggie Fountain.
I want to say to pick quick our boat races
where you go to Jackson, Tennessee and go south a
little bit.
Speaker 1 (18:28):
Man, there's fun stuff. Had all the buzzs put it
out there too.
Speaker 2 (18:34):
Here fifty Ford that has before that we had on
the dull hub.
Speaker 1 (18:38):
Fishing boat man.
Speaker 2 (18:40):
There's a lot of a lot of memories with that hat,
and that will explain the stains.
Speaker 9 (18:47):
None of them are your memories, dear listener.
Speaker 1 (18:50):
But no, Yeah, it looked like something was spilt on the.
Speaker 2 (18:57):
Side of it.
Speaker 5 (18:58):
I think tho for you dropped into something.
Speaker 1 (19:01):
Yeah, they ad first was that the day.
Speaker 9 (19:03):
They had the bobbing for apples competition.
Speaker 5 (19:06):
I mean, those books do go fast. It may have
flew off your head for you.
Speaker 1 (19:09):
Yes, several times.
Speaker 2 (19:10):
I lost many a pair of sunglasses as well, But
that's another story.
Speaker 9 (19:15):
If you want me to send it to Raleigh and
have the boys in the lab analysis.
Speaker 1 (19:18):
Are it looks like it's been washed, though I disagree.
Speaker 5 (19:24):
I'm not gonna smell it. You smell.
Speaker 1 (19:28):
Jagg it out.
Speaker 2 (19:29):
They can be yours right there at the Big Show
dot com. Good morning, got the Big show on the radio.
Married Man the early years. Yes, he's coming up next.
If you just hang right there, we'll get right and
then we're gonna play john Boy Jeopardy. That's right, you
(19:49):
can win a red Maax prize pack.
Speaker 12 (19:51):
You know.
Speaker 2 (19:52):
Redmax makes the best trimmers and floors and commercial zero
turned moors with a two year unlimited hour warranty, Kawasaki
engines and heavy Dude, they fabricated back bow like a
pro with red Max.
Speaker 1 (20:08):
Hang out in minutes. Right now, let's get a married
man wanted to going.
Speaker 15 (20:22):
My redman.
Speaker 21 (20:23):
My ridman drives around in a minivan, got a wife
and some kids. His whole life's on the skids. Hey,
there there goes to maried man.
Speaker 7 (20:36):
House.
Speaker 21 (20:37):
He feel Listen, dude, this poor guy's really screwed hanging on.
Speaker 1 (20:42):
Buy a bread cord of milk, loaf of bread. Hey,
there there.
Speaker 21 (20:47):
Goes for married man, got a big gas grill, buys
his clothes at the gap, and he's just about having on.
Speaker 10 (20:58):
Food this car.
Speaker 21 (21:00):
Married man, married man, friendly neighborhood, married man.
Speaker 1 (21:04):
My marian has nohing life. Will let him do what
the she says, it's about timing groove.
Speaker 15 (21:12):
Well, ma, there's a screw.
Speaker 1 (21:14):
Well you'll find the married man.
Speaker 22 (21:18):
Last time married man encountered as all Powell College buddy
who suggested our hero have a little fun by flirting
with the attractive young lady at the grocery store check
out Kata. Our hero rose to the occasion in his
patented married man style.
Speaker 23 (21:32):
Ooh married, I'm happily married. I've never cheated on my
wife in my entire life. I don't intend to start now.
I'm married, I tell you married.
Speaker 22 (21:42):
Excuse me, I just remembered a couple of things I
forgot to get.
Speaker 1 (21:45):
Hell, well, very smooth. You were right, You've still got it.
Speaker 22 (21:51):
Hey, i may be a costume crusader, but I'm still
a human being.
Speaker 1 (21:56):
She tempted me with her feminine wilds. All she said
was paper or plastic.
Speaker 23 (22:01):
Yeah, well, well with these women today, who knows what
that might mean.
Speaker 24 (22:03):
Not come on, admit it, marry man, you've lost your touch.
Your wife runs your life, man, it happens. It doesn't
mean your life is over. It just means it's not
that interesting anymore.
Speaker 6 (22:16):
That's not true.
Speaker 22 (22:16):
I run my own life.
Speaker 1 (22:18):
I don't let women push me around. Yeah right, I'll
prove it.
Speaker 23 (22:21):
I'll go right back over there to that register right
now and check out, and then I'm gonna go back home.
Speaker 1 (22:27):
And what's the ball game. Yeah, that's it. I'm a man,
I spell.
Speaker 23 (22:32):
M a child and nah, watch me work, mister skeptic.
Speaker 9 (22:39):
Hi find everything you needed?
Speaker 1 (22:41):
Oh yeah, sorry about that pathetic outburst a minute ago.
Speaker 15 (22:45):
Hm.
Speaker 16 (22:46):
Did you see how much these were?
Speaker 5 (22:48):
They don't have a price.
Speaker 15 (22:49):
No, but I'll be glad to walk over and check
for you.
Speaker 5 (22:52):
Oh that's all right, I can check for you.
Speaker 1 (22:54):
Oh, no problem.
Speaker 23 (22:55):
I can be there and back in a flash.
Speaker 7 (22:56):
Really no, No, that's all the way in the back
of the store.
Speaker 1 (22:59):
I'll get somebody to run back there for you.
Speaker 10 (23:02):
Christ check twelve pack camp Haax's plushble super maxy open.
Speaker 5 (23:06):
Pads with Wingey's for the guy in the cave right here, sir?
Speaker 9 (23:11):
Anything wrong?
Speaker 19 (23:12):
Oh?
Speaker 22 (23:13):
I was just watching what passes for my life flash
before my eyes. Well, married man be able to survive
the greatest humiliation of his costume career. And that thing
with the ballgame was he just blowing smoke? That too, answers.
In our next sphincter titaning adventure, Same married Time, Same
married channel, there's a school you'll.
Speaker 10 (23:36):
Find the married mane.
Speaker 2 (23:40):
Years out all another another episode coming up about hour.
Speaker 1 (23:46):
Hi, let's jump in here and play john Boy Jeopardy.
Speaker 2 (23:50):
According to Parenting Magazine, this is the most expensive sport
for American kids to participate in.
Speaker 5 (24:00):
What is fortnight?
Speaker 1 (24:02):
Fortnight? Oh yeah, no, that's relatively cheap.
Speaker 5 (24:07):
That's funny the people that are younger than you.
Speaker 2 (24:11):
What y'all got the most expensive sport for kids? One
eight hundred Big Show you told free line, Come on
play next.
Speaker 1 (24:43):
Good Monday morning. There's a big show on the radio
for your June third.
Speaker 2 (24:48):
Today's feature track for the Big Show bit Box Deep
Thoughts with Mary Jane turns for keywords, Mary Jane, when
you hit the box at the Big Show.
Speaker 1 (24:56):
Dot com there right now, let's play yes.
Speaker 25 (25:01):
Five Across America, it's John Boyd Jeopardy and now a
man who says he had to leave the best job
he ever had because of something his boss said.
Speaker 1 (25:13):
It was you're fired, peas John.
Speaker 2 (25:21):
As I hated Burrow out of Sandersville, Georgia. Good morning, Burrow,
Good morning, good morning body all right man, Tennessee. Fat
Boy's dad was named Burrow. He's one that owned the
Oak Grove.
Speaker 1 (25:34):
The bar there. Jer Lee Lewis put his head through
the ceiling.
Speaker 9 (25:37):
The only thing I ever known about.
Speaker 2 (25:38):
His dad, Ali Burrow you got the first shot at
John Bordjevity this morning. According to Parenting Magazine, this is
the most expensive sport for American kids to participate in.
Speaker 24 (25:54):
How about a questrian you know, like the horse horse
riding stuff?
Speaker 1 (25:57):
Horse horse riding a question. Well, let's see.
Speaker 11 (26:04):
That right, and.
Speaker 2 (26:09):
I hear it's no dropping the bucket for wives either.
Don't get cheaper. Something about girls and them horses that
I'm talking about? Well, burrow, good work, buddy, bego, Red
Max Prize pack is head down to Sandersville for you.
Speaker 1 (26:29):
All right now, thank y'all, y'all have a good day.
Thank you buddy too. Alright, then I'll run down the
list here in a second.
Speaker 6 (26:36):
H y'all.
Speaker 2 (26:38):
All right here before we get the news there in
questrian sports are looking to live their horses. Yes, the
most expensive sport for kids or any human for that matter,
we determined right. Ice hockey is second. I wouldn't have
to deal with that growing up in the South. Ice hockey, fencing,
you know, you want to build the outfit.
Speaker 1 (26:57):
And the swords. Yeah, lessons skiing and snowboarding, No, that
makes sense.
Speaker 5 (27:03):
Lift tickets.
Speaker 2 (27:04):
The most expensive for kids sports lacrosse, gymnastics, competitive cheerleading,
competitive dance, golf, figure skating. A lot of this is
travel sports.
Speaker 1 (27:16):
When I get real good at.
Speaker 2 (27:17):
It, you know, tool and then all the way through tennis, tackle, football,
is twelve soccer, basketball, swimming, baseball, martial arts, wrestling, cycling,
cross country.
Speaker 5 (27:30):
Cross country.
Speaker 1 (27:32):
Gotta buy some new shorts, ransom shoes. That's about it.
Speaker 9 (27:37):
Run it so, Beanie Baby collecting that didn't make.
Speaker 1 (27:39):
The Listeno execut to keep hoping.
Speaker 7 (28:11):
This is the award winning John Boy and Billy Big Show,
the South's number one export.
Speaker 15 (28:33):
It's a marginal day in the neighborhood. If people like
you for a neighbor, won't you move out? Won't you
move out? Hello, boys and girls. Mister Rayford hare glad
to be able to add a little bit of class
to this otherwise juvenile redneck yuckfest and help straighten out
the new generation of crumb crutchers. Today's adventure day in
(28:57):
mister Rayford's neighborhood. Our special game this little Tommy Vaughn. Well, Tommy,
how are you enjoying adventure days so far?
Speaker 1 (29:04):
It's really neat?
Speaker 9 (29:05):
Mister Rayford.
Speaker 26 (29:06):
What a great idea of putting all those old abandoned
refrigerators with clubhouse painted on them in your backyard. I
haven't seen my brother Eddie in the last few minutes,
So do you think you could help me find him?
Speaker 15 (29:16):
Well, we'll talk about that later. You know, Tommy, I
thought you were coming along on the road to curmudgeon hood.
You know, I was on that cynical road back when
you were just a drunken glaze in your father's eye.
It doesn't just happen. You have to work at it.
It's a twenty four hour a day job. You can't
just take an occasional stab at it. You've got to
make it your life I have. You've got to decide
(29:37):
are you going to be a good head or a
butt head?
Speaker 26 (29:41):
I know I've shown patience and compassion in the past,
but I want to be a butt head.
Speaker 15 (29:46):
Good, good, good. You're a fine boy, Bud. With a
little work, we can take care of that. You've got
to surround yourself with people of like mind, people who
think exactly like you do, people you can call a pal.
Speaker 1 (29:58):
Are you my pal, Tommy, Yes, sir, I'm your pal.
Speaker 18 (30:02):
Good boy.
Speaker 15 (30:04):
How about a nice big glass of bi low colum.
Speaker 26 (30:07):
Yeah, that'd be great. I really got thirsty out there
dodging all those bear tracks.
Speaker 15 (30:12):
Ah yes, And remember you can't fall in the trap
of saying what you think people want to hear. Speak
your mind down the consequences. Be a leader, be a curmudgeon,
be a yeah yeah butt head.
Speaker 1 (30:24):
I got it, I got it.
Speaker 7 (30:25):
Can I go now?
Speaker 1 (30:26):
I hate being a latchkey child.
Speaker 15 (30:28):
Well, if your mother would quit her job and stay
home like all women should, the world wouldn't be so
screwed up.
Speaker 1 (30:34):
Tell her, I said, give it up.
Speaker 15 (30:36):
She can't have it all tomorrow And mister Rayford's neighborhood
leaf blowers modern convenience or just another fiendish attempt to
annoy me personally till then get out of my yard,
stay indoors, and if your parents go out to eat,
pretend your sick, stay home and quit ruining my life
till then this is mister Rayford saying, we're off at
(31:01):
good I don all hold the little bastards off for
a while.
Speaker 1 (31:05):
Shown boy and.
Speaker 10 (31:06):
Billy ya, Good morning radio?
Speaker 1 (31:16):
Done right, Good morning. That's a big shaw on the radio.
Speaker 4 (31:48):
And here we go, Oh gobbledy snaffle.
Speaker 7 (31:54):
I'm old and I hate everything, especially television. Back in
my day, we didn't have no fancy schmancy full color,
high definition, space saving flint screen gizmo with a fifty
inch picture and four hundred channels on twenty four hours
(32:16):
a day. We had a plain wooden box with a
teeny round screen so small you could only watch it
one eye at a time. He was covered with five
thousand knobs, only two of which worked on off in volume.
(32:36):
The rest of the knobs were there to keep us
busy because we were too damn pig ignorant to know
there weren't no real TV shows yet. The TV was
so dad blame big we had to build the rest
of the house around it. It took up so much
room that we younguns had to sleep out back with
the hogs, and they'd eat your toes and fingers while
(33:00):
you slipped. But at least you managed to stay warm
under that nice cozy blank at a steam and big manure.
And then, if you are lucky, every once in a while,
some smart ass would broadcast a live picture.
Speaker 1 (33:20):
Of a stuffed animal. Since there weren't no sound, we.
Speaker 7 (33:24):
Didn't know if we'd won a prize or erase of
stuffed bunnies. We're taking over the world. We were dumb
as mudd, and that's the way we liked it. We'd
gather around that one inch square screen stare at it
for hours on end, fumbling with knobs, drooling and scratching
our butts.
Speaker 1 (33:44):
With no fingers, going blind one eye at a.
Speaker 4 (33:47):
Time, slip slappity slew.
Speaker 7 (33:49):
Look at us, We're a bunch of tolless, fingerless crapstick
and hiltily cyclops. All hail the bunny Man. I can't
wait till someone invinced the Jerry Springer show.
Speaker 1 (34:06):
Howdy Do the Digly Day? And we liked it.
Speaker 7 (34:14):
And we didn't have no sitcoms to break no day.
Speaker 1 (34:18):
If we wanted a good laugh, we didn't have.
Speaker 7 (34:20):
Any Andy and Bonnie and Jerry and Cramer and Raws
and Phoebe.
Speaker 1 (34:25):
To make sport up. We had to go all the
way to.
Speaker 7 (34:29):
The next county where this bunch of slavic squad has lived,
and we'd single out Boris to jabber and freak. With
his unborn twins lower half growing out of his stomach.
We'd strip his shirt off and chase him with handfuls
of stinging nettles. He hopped through the high weeds, running
for his life, and that creepy little torso with kikets
(34:52):
with little legs, and he'd looked like a big cricket
man jumping through the field and we'd all laugh, and
because that's funny right there. I don't care who you are.
And if we wanted a reality show, we'd make our own,
like who watched her Lighter Fart? We'd gorge ourselves on
(35:16):
raw broccoli and pickled pigs feet, and then we'd all
gather around in a big circle and start pooting into
the campfire waiting for that one big super fart that
would barbecue all your kid in a ball of blue flame.
And even if you're won, you still wound up sending
all the hair off your keysta and getting second degree
burns all.
Speaker 1 (35:35):
Over your private parts.
Speaker 4 (35:37):
We'll boop boop the doodle the bangle.
Speaker 7 (35:42):
We're freak chasing kinscorch and xenophobes, sitting around on our
French fried butt, smeller like burnt hair.
Speaker 1 (35:49):
Which way to the Wienie roads?
Speaker 4 (35:51):
Oh glorious glorious morning television. Ah flugles, all.
Speaker 1 (36:05):
Wait, you up my list?
Speaker 27 (36:07):
No hot ve herd, it's hot, I low ho hond
Honda gun. Hey, everyone knows that's laud list is laud list,
is let listen, My god, horaduar Fix's lut listen. It's
left list.
Speaker 1 (36:19):
Hop honey is honahah gone. I'm coming up every you
no I know, Oh what
Speaker 10 (36:34):
M
Hosts And Creators
Billy James
Johnny "John Boy" Isley
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