April 15, 2025 • 37 mins
Tuesday (pt 1 of 2): On today’s Late Riser’s Podcast, John Boy shares TMI about being able to fly in his dreams.. - A listener writes in about a Squirrel-cicle.. - The Battle of the ‘mater plants is on.. - We’ll take a drive down the Motor-Mile and stop off at Ozzy Osbourne's Toyota dealership.. - Mater-Girl makes an appearance.. - Some Doctors share some embarrassing stories about past patients.. - Ike Turner offers advise on how to get a woman.. - Poor Ed in Alabama is retraumatized by his encounter with an emu.. - and we'll wrap up with a quick exploration of Elvis Presley, Junior?…
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Good barning Big Show listeners. This is the Honorable Mayor
Merwin Q. Fiddle swap uh, I'm Missigan oh fiddle swoop.
It's a beautiful day in Dismal Seepach, South Carolina, and
it's even better when we're listening to the John Boy
and Billy Big Sal A mister Nah Big Show. But
that reminds me come on down for the forty second
(00:21):
annual Dismal Seepach Big Sal Festival.
Speaker 2 (00:24):
Yeah, that one spelled correctly.
Speaker 3 (01:00):
Good morning, The Big Show is on the radio for this,
for this wonderful Tuesday morning, Tuesday morning?
Speaker 4 (01:06):
It iss, what have you done with this ride?
Speaker 5 (01:10):
No?
Speaker 2 (01:10):
Why do you want to do that? Why do you?
Why do you you just revealing my side? Fill last night?
Randy So, I looked for a little entertainment.
Speaker 4 (01:18):
Okay, tell you what that I love you.
Speaker 6 (01:22):
You know you know that I respect you, and I
know everything you've done for me, and I couldn't be
more grateful.
Speaker 4 (01:26):
But really, just to get this her with hit me
in the face right.
Speaker 2 (01:29):
Now, I don't really know it.
Speaker 4 (01:31):
I'm not gonna be mad.
Speaker 3 (01:32):
No, I'm not gonna hit I'm not gonna hit you.
I'm not gonna head.
Speaker 2 (01:37):
You ez there, mclen it'll feel better.
Speaker 4 (01:40):
It'll be over and we can move on with a day.
Speaker 7 (01:42):
No, and there's always a chance you might actually feel
bad about it when you see it's.
Speaker 2 (01:46):
Frawled in the floor.
Speaker 4 (01:47):
It always feels a bad about it right afterwards.
Speaker 3 (01:49):
I always feel about about it. That's as say, we
got lined up today. I'm right here, right here, you go,
there you go, I got.
Speaker 2 (02:05):
This big boys.
Speaker 3 (02:06):
Yeah, will give you legs up for outbursts in minutes
Tuesday morning, everybody, the Big Show is on the radio.
Speaker 2 (02:18):
Here.
Speaker 3 (02:18):
It is April the fifteen. Listen closely if you plan
to play outburst.
Speaker 2 (02:22):
Isn't he wonder they along with us? Fake along with us?
And your aphilogy's not gonna right.
Speaker 3 (02:31):
Categories Yeah, yeah, yeah, we got a category from these
states in history, right. Leonardo da Vinci would have been
five hundred and fifty one.
Speaker 2 (02:40):
Happy buffday to me. I don't look at it, do I.
Speaker 3 (02:44):
I always think about a football coach, But which one
am I thinking about?
Speaker 2 (02:47):
When I hear Leonardo da Vinci? You think of a
football coach? We hear Leonardo da Vinci. I don't know
why weird? I don't know.
Speaker 3 (02:55):
It's a lot of things going on in there, boys.
Leonardo Leonardo DiCaprio.
Speaker 2 (02:59):
Yeah, Vince Lombardi. Ben's Lombardi.
Speaker 3 (03:03):
That's what Leonod da Vinci, Vincey Lombardi. See, Leonardo kind
of sounds like Lombardi. Vincey sounds like Vince. I bet
Vince Lombardi was named after Leonardo da Vinci.
Speaker 2 (03:15):
Well, when you put it that way, it makes perfect sense.
It's wonderful. Told you a lot of stuff going over
between these years, he says, leads to something.
Speaker 4 (03:24):
I can't wait to see what he just said up.
Speaker 2 (03:26):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (03:27):
Well, besides being a painter, he was an engineer, scientist, astronomer, architect, inventor, geologist,
and a botanist.
Speaker 2 (03:36):
Vince Lombardi was a botanist. I thought it was methodist. E.
Leonardo's most famous paintings were Mona Lisa, Mona Lisa, and
The Last Supper.
Speaker 3 (03:49):
His most famous invention would probably be the parachutevins. He
died May second, fifteen nineteen, at the age of sixty seven.
Speaker 7 (03:57):
You know, he did The Last Supper and later he
did a less famous Dogs Eating the Last set.
Speaker 2 (04:02):
It was weird.
Speaker 7 (04:02):
Yeah, Well, Judas had like the Acis Spades between his
toes was weird.
Speaker 8 (04:07):
That's wow.
Speaker 3 (04:08):
I've always liked that dog. It reminds me of the
NFL because of the dog pound.
Speaker 4 (04:16):
See, he was setting something killers. I think you owe him.
Speaker 3 (04:22):
On this date, in seventeen thirty eight, the bottle opener
was invented.
Speaker 7 (04:27):
Which is odd because the bottle was invented in sixteen
thirty eight.
Speaker 2 (04:30):
So people were going, finally it was me invention.
Speaker 4 (04:34):
Yeah, you know, the can opener was invented.
Speaker 6 (04:36):
After cans were invented, they used to beat them open
with you know, sharp objects.
Speaker 2 (04:41):
People were stupid back a bit.
Speaker 3 (04:43):
Well, boys, mother is the necessity of invention. Necessity is
the mother of invention. I didn't want to step you
run a wrong filler and final leg up. On this date,
in nineteen fifty two, the first bank credit card was
issued Franklin National Bank in New York. The card was
(05:04):
only accepted at local merchants, who would in turn offer
a discount for card users. The card was offered at
no fee to the bank's customers, but you had to
pay the entire balance off each month.
Speaker 7 (05:14):
And the guy would run his balance up to high
and they said, I'm sorry, sir, this was declined.
Speaker 2 (05:18):
Do you have another card, he goes hello.
Speaker 3 (05:22):
Seemed like a good idea, but due to the low
number of users and low profit margins for the banks,
the cards disappeared as fast as they had appeared. Then,
in nineteen fifty eight, Bank of America gave it another
world by rolling out with a named the Bank Americ Card.
Oh yeah, like other attempts, had offered card holders a
totally new element, the ability to pay over time.
Speaker 2 (05:42):
That's what I'm talking about.
Speaker 3 (05:44):
The card was wildly successful. Today, the Bank Americ Card
is known as Visa and is now by far the
most widely held an accepted.
Speaker 2 (05:50):
Credit card in the world.
Speaker 3 (05:52):
It is the closest thing there is to a universal currency.
Visa's aims to replace traditional cash and checks as a
third form of payment, and they just might pull it off. Currently,
there are over one billion cards issued worldwide, with an
annual transaction volume of more than two trillion dollars.
Speaker 2 (06:11):
A year to true.
Speaker 3 (06:13):
Trillion dollars a year. About that, Yeah, Visa pretty smart.
So good luck to Visa doing away with cash, getting
that one world monetary system, working on getting small enough
to fit in your right hand or forehead. Start everything with.
Speaker 2 (06:27):
Six sixty six right y'all have a good week.
Speaker 4 (06:29):
Well there's the visa count.
Speaker 2 (06:31):
One eight hundred big shows. You're told, free line if
you want to play out first.
Speaker 3 (06:35):
We got this big old prize bagage just waiting for
somebody to claim.
Speaker 2 (06:38):
We'll do it next.
Speaker 3 (07:02):
Good morning to make show's already all right, man, that's
amount of family's.
Speaker 2 (07:09):
Let's play out burst.
Speaker 9 (07:11):
It's the game that anyone can win, john boy, Billy
gave you from the big busby.
Speaker 2 (07:21):
Let's go consisting number one.
Speaker 10 (07:24):
Should have a y up against people love the best
time little big shots.
Speaker 3 (07:35):
All right, our first contenson in the morning, got a
Sylvannah Georgia.
Speaker 8 (07:40):
It's Robbie. We shot he How you going, eh, Robbie?
Speaker 2 (07:52):
How you doing? Man?
Speaker 4 (07:53):
How you doing doing?
Speaker 2 (07:54):
Buddy? Okay? And Johnson? Remember winning isn't everything is the
only thing, all right, Robbie?
Speaker 3 (08:03):
Just are you ready as you hear the legs up?
Are you paying attention? I was doing it thinking you
might get through, and here you are.
Speaker 11 (08:10):
That's right, I believe all right.
Speaker 4 (08:12):
You know what I love about this break so far?
Speaker 6 (08:15):
Billy jumps on your bandwagon with Leonardi being the coach,
and you laid down on it.
Speaker 2 (08:23):
Don't you know? That's the quickest way to get him
to move on to something else.
Speaker 4 (08:27):
It's like you didn't even hear him do it.
Speaker 2 (08:29):
Yeah, yeah, I'll be honest with you.
Speaker 3 (08:31):
I didn't.
Speaker 2 (08:33):
I was looking for my three items, getting ready to
ask Robbie say. It's one of my superpowers. I can
totally tune yell out. He's man.
Speaker 6 (08:44):
But we know it now because you have this little
tip off. You do this laugh like this, I mean,
I mean you were you wanted everybody to think you
had kind of like the laugh you just did before
you went.
Speaker 2 (08:59):
That's the way. All right, we'll good. Maybe I started
tipping myself off.
Speaker 8 (09:05):
All right, Robbie, are you ready?
Speaker 2 (09:07):
Yeah, I'm ready. All right, man, here we go. We
need three famous paintings. Ready go long.
Speaker 11 (09:15):
At least.
Speaker 3 (09:17):
My clans lose thing on the ceiling. Oh man, Robbie Stavid,
I trying to help you. Whistler's mother that helped. He
thought you were calling him gay. Oh yeah, I shouldn't
have used a randy whistle on. Hey Robbie.
Speaker 2 (09:44):
Yeah, hey man, you're still gonna get something for you.
Speaker 11 (09:47):
Hang up?
Speaker 2 (09:47):
How about that?
Speaker 11 (09:48):
All right?
Speaker 3 (09:48):
First time call?
Speaker 2 (09:50):
All right?
Speaker 3 (09:50):
See, Robbie just takes my word. For it moves on
perfect Jackie, make Robbie happy and not that way.
Speaker 2 (09:57):
Oh ask for his credit card. Dear Diary, this is Gary.
You see, I have the weirdest dream.
Speaker 11 (10:14):
The other night I was duct taped to an examination
table while a bunch of metal patients were mumbling gibberish
into my ear. Y y'all, turns out it weren't no dream.
I was just listening to wordy word on the Big
Show with John Boy and Milly. Someone needs to heard
those losers into the not okay corral.
Speaker 10 (10:39):
M h.
Speaker 2 (10:43):
M hm h, good morning the Big Shows on the radio. Well,
(11:10):
then my figure out when my dreams I can fly.
Speaker 3 (11:13):
No, seriously, I only flew naked once usually and he
really needed the right.
Speaker 2 (11:20):
Rick Flair was on the same right.
Speaker 3 (11:22):
Yeah yeah, but because usually when I fly, you know,
I discovered that I can fly like while I'm flying,
you know, so you know the scary.
Speaker 7 (11:35):
Thing is when he flies, he's usually naked, even.
Speaker 2 (11:38):
In like US airways. I mean, you know, because I
mean always. I mean, first of y'all have flying dreams? Yeah,
oh yeah, that's very colmon. Yeah I have. I've never had.
Speaker 3 (11:46):
Flying Okay, So are y'all confident in your flying skills
in your dreams.
Speaker 2 (11:50):
Uh see no, no, see, I'm not either.
Speaker 3 (11:53):
I have to learn it every dream. You don't have
to learn it again. Okay, I'm going down, pull up,
pull up, pull up? You know, dreamy now flying into stuff.
I had never crashed, and I found out I have
the ability to hover. But it's finding out to you
(12:15):
every time. Man, it's just so exciting. Have you ever
took somebody flying with you now that I've never done
tandem fly? You know, like when Rayford jumps out of
the airplane, they hook him on right in front of
the guy.
Speaker 2 (12:27):
Oh now who it wasn't Rayford?
Speaker 7 (12:33):
Anyway, I might have to get Vic Kenley dream doctor
in on my We may have already found that more
than we need I have.
Speaker 4 (12:41):
I'm done.
Speaker 2 (12:44):
Pillars is making fun of my dream. Fucking hover, Can y'all?
I rest my cat.
Speaker 4 (12:52):
He's got to be just a little bit better than you,
even in his dream.
Speaker 12 (12:58):
His dreams gotta beat your dream or that is ain't
gonna fly.
Speaker 2 (13:02):
Let's have a flying rais or not. And he's got
the ability to fly, but complains he's got to learn
every time he fly. Well, yeah, I'm already up, never
had to take off, so I'm gonna have to get
to better take off, take off. You wake up and
(13:23):
there you're late for your own dreaming session. I'm not
gonna learn to take off. I don't get to better.
Speaker 8 (13:30):
Sorry, I'm late have take off?
Speaker 2 (13:33):
And where's my clothes? I was made a hurt. Have
you ever landed? Yeah? Yeah, yeah two point landing man.
Speaker 4 (13:44):
Oh so you just kind of flitter down to the ground.
Speaker 3 (13:46):
Flitter, I don't flitter, Yeah, I got hovers and then
lowers jet to the ground. That's right, like like on him,
harrier jets.
Speaker 12 (13:57):
Are there people around the land, dear, so you're pooting
to bring you break your fall?
Speaker 2 (14:04):
Turn on my back. This may be where that crop
circles thing got started off.
Speaker 3 (14:42):
Good morning, the big shows right here on the radio
about corner away from the hour.
Speaker 2 (14:47):
Right, didn't bring in the Cape Muller, whatever may.
Speaker 8 (14:58):
My mind?
Speaker 2 (14:59):
Mind. Man drives around in a mini van, god a
wife and some kids.
Speaker 9 (15:05):
His whole life's on the skids.
Speaker 2 (15:07):
Hey, there there goes the married man.
Speaker 8 (15:12):
House.
Speaker 9 (15:12):
He feel Listen, dude, this poor guy's really screwed hanging on.
Buy a bread cord of milk, loaf of bread.
Speaker 8 (15:21):
Hey, there there.
Speaker 2 (15:23):
Goes the married man, got a big gas.
Speaker 9 (15:27):
Will, buys his clothes at the gap, and he's just
about had enough for this grid. Married man, married man,
friendly neighborhood, married man. Life for him has nothing wife
or let him do what they she says, it's about
timing groove up. Wherever there's a screw up, you'll find
(15:51):
the married man.
Speaker 7 (15:53):
As our story opens, the California Odyssey continues, the Action
Friends have just taken on the Osbornes in a celebrity
edition of The Family freakas TV game show.
Speaker 2 (16:10):
All Right, thanks a lot, everybody. That's a wrapping so
college buddy, how'd you think it when.
Speaker 8 (16:14):
We're number one?
Speaker 2 (16:16):
Osballs? Roule rocker roll? Does that answer your question? Gee?
I didn't think it was that bad.
Speaker 3 (16:23):
Hey, we got beat two hundred and fifty to nothing
by the Osbournes.
Speaker 2 (16:27):
Yah had old chucky girls, a little bit of naxious.
I like her mama though.
Speaker 13 (16:32):
Hey, good job guys. We have fun, no our feelings. Hey,
drinking god, you say you had some some scufs with you.
Speaker 2 (16:39):
Yeah, I cleaned out the mini bar back at the hotel.
I got him right here in my utility. Bell, I
like you big Guy. I like you, Devil guy.
Speaker 7 (16:48):
Okay, fellows cum big day tomorrow. We probably ought to
turn in.
Speaker 2 (16:51):
Hey, who's a buzzkiller? That's Captain Murray.
Speaker 7 (16:55):
Guy.
Speaker 2 (16:55):
He ain't a big drinker a nurse to be? Okay, mate,
let's rock.
Speaker 8 (16:59):
Hey, honey's there?
Speaker 2 (17:00):
Are we going all the way to daylight?
Speaker 3 (17:01):
Big girl?
Speaker 2 (17:02):
Can it sounds good to me?
Speaker 8 (17:03):
Hey, give me one of the mini models.
Speaker 11 (17:06):
I like you, big girl.
Speaker 2 (17:07):
She about halfway wild?
Speaker 7 (17:08):
But guy, married man, shouldn't we put a stop to
this jum. I wouldn't even know where to start. Come on,
let's just get on back to the hotel.
Speaker 2 (17:18):
Next morning, morning, married Man, You sure are up early.
I was just checking out the early morning news. Anything
big happening not really coming up?
Speaker 1 (17:30):
Looks like another beautiful la day on the way, Doctor
Fred will give us your action weather forecast. Action News
at daybreak continues after these messages.
Speaker 2 (17:39):
Good morning, Oh Girls Gone Wild.
Speaker 14 (17:42):
The world's wildest uncensored video series presents super Girls Gone
Wild feature eg America's hottest new superhero baby doll, Captain.
Speaker 2 (17:51):
Action Girl, wieheo, I'm the drunk.
Speaker 14 (17:55):
It's a full hour of the Kate Cutie Pie showing
off her Dynamic duo.
Speaker 2 (17:59):
Hey, y'all watch them with special celebrity guest star Ozzy Osbourne.
Speaker 7 (18:06):
Your roll?
Speaker 2 (18:08):
You telling me that?
Speaker 3 (18:10):
Oh?
Speaker 14 (18:11):
Super Girls Gunwild BHS video nineteen ninety five Director's Got
double DVD with three hours of special uncensored bonus features
Just twenty four ninety five to order called one one
hundred two Biggins, Get Loose, Get Wild, Super Girl's Gun Wild.
Speaker 3 (18:26):
Order Now okay, now can we go back home?
Speaker 2 (18:33):
You know that might not be a bad idea.
Speaker 7 (18:37):
Hollie Hendenburg looks like there is such a thing as
too much media exposure. Killed on again. Next time when
we'll hear Captain Action Girl.
Speaker 8 (18:45):
Say, I told you it was gonna work out, stupid.
Speaker 7 (18:49):
Captain Action Guy say, hey, my guys, I have free
DVDs for everybody, And.
Speaker 2 (18:54):
Ozzy say for good roll dog mess on?
Speaker 7 (18:58):
Next speak down, tightening Adventure, Same married Time, Same married channel.
Speaker 9 (19:03):
Wherever there's a school, you find the married mine.
Speaker 15 (19:10):
I stand on a hill, but not for a thrill,
but for the breath of a fresh kill. And never
mind the man who contemplates doing away with license plates.
He stands alone anyhow, Baking the cookies of discontent from
(19:31):
the heat of the laundra back then leaving his soul,
and then like in poetry, I go dot dot dot,
you know.
Speaker 2 (19:42):
Kind of horse center.
Speaker 3 (19:43):
Then I drop down, and then I go leaving his soul,
parting the waters.
Speaker 2 (19:49):
I'm damadulla our blocotta of.
Speaker 8 (19:55):
Mankind.
Speaker 2 (19:56):
If you're like that.
Speaker 8 (19:57):
Job boy, yeah, m.
Speaker 2 (20:30):
Good morning to make shows on the radio. Come here,
let us look at you.
Speaker 8 (20:39):
Letters. Oh, we get letters. We get your letters.
Speaker 2 (20:43):
Sappy nail and nail bad nails day, Reach.
Speaker 8 (20:49):
Right and pull what out letters?
Speaker 2 (20:53):
I love those letters, and that's why I watch.
Speaker 3 (20:56):
You got to say, oh boy, alrighty Jimmy dick out
of jessup. Georgia said, hey, y'all, this one of those
lessons learned. Leave the wild ones alone. We enjoy our
police beat and keep us on on the local happenings.
Pass it on the folks. Understand squirrels can't be trusted.
(21:17):
Is here a woman on Evers Road reported being bitten
by a squirrel. The victim told Debudyes that she had
been feeding the squirrel some bread on her porch. When
she leaned down, the squirrel attacked her hand, ran up
her arm and across her back. She yelled for help,
and her husband came and knocked the squirrel off her.
The squirrel then attacked her again, oh and was again
(21:37):
knocked loose. The couple went back inside their home and
watched the squirrel, which never left the front yard. When
the woman's husband came outside with a gun, the animal
was still in front of the porch steps. Man told
officers that he killed the squirrel because he was concerned
(21:58):
that it might hurt neighborhood children, and he kept the
body in his freezer pending instructions from law enforcement. See
I like that final play. She forgets about it, blasshom razor.
Speaker 16 (22:17):
As I have learned from firsthand experience, if you're bitten
by an animal and you call the cops, or say
your spouse calls them for you, and they send animal control,
which are police officers, by the way, be sure you've
kept the animal, otherwise that officer can force you to have.
Speaker 3 (22:37):
Of course, when you had the little chipmunks attack you
in your basement, that's right, Yeah, I mean, yeah, so
that was the thing to do.
Speaker 2 (22:47):
Keep keep kill it, keep it and kill it, keep
it to a wildlife.
Speaker 11 (22:51):
Yeah.
Speaker 16 (22:51):
They have to saw its little head off and cut
its brain into sections and find out if.
Speaker 2 (22:54):
It's maybe maybe she would enjoy that too. Oh right,
I'll be careful out there.
Speaker 3 (23:12):
Good Tuesday morning. The Big Show is on your radio.
Coming up, we'll hear the latest edition to the Celebrity
Motor Mile. What's this going in between Gary Busey's and
Ike Turners?
Speaker 2 (23:23):
Yeah? Right down the street? Yeah? Perfect? All right now
it is John Boygeborty time case.
Speaker 3 (23:28):
You misanswered yesterday's question saying you probably can't imagine starting
your day without it. Both from the early seventeen hundreds
to eighteen sixty two was considered a frivolous luxury fact
of British even collected attack from those who used it,
and many French people consider it unnecessary.
Speaker 2 (23:41):
Today the American Army.
Speaker 3 (23:46):
Soap. Yeah, yeah, that soap. It's good though, we've learned.
All right here soap? Good he got today? It's bad stinky.
Here's adjeopardy question. During the seventeenth century, the average woman
had thirteen of these What our teeth?
Speaker 2 (24:11):
But ment only had ten. No, what do y'all think?
Speaker 3 (24:19):
One night under a big show, you're told free line snow,
we're calling on good do we get a winter?
Speaker 2 (24:23):
Let's get on it. We'll play a neck. Good morning,
(24:51):
a big shows on your radio. All right, we're ready.
You got the money? Oh yeah, it's time. Yes, live across.
That's John Johnny Hoday and now you're host. His circle
of friends have an average of thirteen teeth. In fact,
they take turns sitting on his front steps on Halloween. Jeez,
(25:14):
John Moore. I say hello to David. Out of you,
poor you in Mississippi.
Speaker 3 (25:20):
Good morning, David Yay, good morning, Good morning, Sir David.
During the seventeenth century, the average woman had thirteen of these.
Speaker 2 (25:29):
I'm gonna get a hat, show us hats. Oh not hats.
I guess women back and did wear a hat, won't it?
Speaker 3 (25:40):
Oh?
Speaker 2 (25:40):
Yeah? All right? So David, I like the what you think?
Speaker 17 (25:44):
All right, appreciate it.
Speaker 2 (25:46):
Okay, you're welcome. Have a good day man, all right,
thank you for all right. Yeah, I'll validated. Maryland's up
out of Amarillo, Texas. Hello Maryland, Good morning. What are
you doing today?
Speaker 7 (26:01):
Just fine?
Speaker 2 (26:02):
Good? All right? Maryland's sitting there thinking what you got.
Let's say, dresses, show us dresses. Dresses, Maryland, how many
dresses would you say you have?
Speaker 12 (26:19):
I don't think I could count the numbad dresses.
Speaker 4 (26:22):
Is that right now?
Speaker 3 (26:22):
Back in seventy century, they probably probably wear the same
thing for a couple of days, huh, I would imagine.
Speaker 12 (26:27):
Well, I would think so, yes, probably, and it.
Speaker 3 (26:29):
Wasn't probably that many so maybe they weren't as freaked
out as about wearing the same thing as old Isabella
over there.
Speaker 18 (26:36):
So you know they stuck with that one pair of
jeans because they left most of their stuff up North.
Speaker 2 (26:41):
Maryland in seventeenth century. Yeah, travel like that.
Speaker 3 (26:44):
Yeah, all right, Maryland, Well, thanks for playing, okay, alright,
baby bye bye, Eddie out of Winston Salem, North Carolina.
Speaker 2 (26:52):
Hell, whoa weddy boy? All right, Eddie? What you god? Buddy?
Speaker 3 (27:00):
I got children, thirteen children, that's coact you were so white?
Speaker 2 (27:13):
Yeah, man, thirteen children.
Speaker 3 (27:15):
They wasn't worry about Rex, they won't worry about getting
out of the house working, and.
Speaker 2 (27:21):
It wasn't cable, so you know, yeah, what else you
have to do?
Speaker 9 (27:24):
That's exactly right?
Speaker 2 (27:25):
All right, you didn't hold on it, Jack can get
your information. We'll get it to you, all right, I did.
Speaker 8 (27:32):
Greetings, all this is big show.
Speaker 17 (27:34):
Legal counsel al Oficious Pete beagele Hole of the Beaufort
Bagel Hole. Some other shows have accused John Boy and
Billy of creating a morning radio monopoly, that it's profoundly illegal.
Oh that's hog wash. It's all perfectly legal, just like
(27:55):
the Big Show with John Boy and Billy.
Speaker 2 (28:28):
Good Morning to make shows on the radio gym. I
made a man coming by to check on two plants.
Mine's doing well. Billy's does have a little problem.
Speaker 3 (28:41):
Who knew when we put it right next to the
sprinkler head with about eight hundred pounds of.
Speaker 2 (28:45):
Pressure of water.
Speaker 7 (28:46):
Yeah, I would you do if you've been hammered by
a sprinkler head four hours.
Speaker 4 (28:50):
I went out there yesterday.
Speaker 12 (28:51):
It was after everybody left, and the mater plant wasn't
expecting anybody to walk up. I saw Billy's plant smoking.
That's because the John Boy plants eating all the fertilizer.
Now have you noticed, I mean, Johnny's is like a bush.
Speaker 2 (29:10):
I know everybody, so how many plants. There's just one.
Speaker 7 (29:13):
Fatter and fatter, And we had to put two steaks
on a John Boy just it's a multiplying baby.
Speaker 2 (29:18):
Yes see.
Speaker 4 (29:19):
And again I'll point out the John Boy plants getting
all the attention.
Speaker 2 (29:25):
So the apple doesn't fall far from the tree, and
neither does the major And I know you are saying
to yourself, what can we do to help? No, I
don't think anybody says, no, we need lady bugs. That's
Jim lay exactly.
Speaker 12 (29:40):
Let's ask people to bring an infestation of insects to
the building.
Speaker 3 (29:43):
Now, lady bugs, you put them, just doumble them out
on the major plants. Let them live there and they
eat the little afids, don't they well, aphids Aphis don't
believe in God. Oh so, so, anybody got some lady
blugs we're trying to get.
Speaker 4 (30:00):
Have you ever met anybody in your life that had
lady bugs?
Speaker 2 (30:04):
All bugging rivers? John Bo caught several, but they were
all mailed, they were all gone. There's a lot of time.
Speaker 4 (30:12):
Come on, Billy's plan.
Speaker 3 (30:15):
All right, we're gonna get the pictures of the major
plants on the world wide Web.
Speaker 2 (30:19):
I know you've been waiting to see them.
Speaker 12 (30:20):
As we need a little tiny ball cap to put
up on the top of the steak on the John
Boy Plant.
Speaker 2 (30:49):
Good morning, the big show is on the radio. How
do you This is Ozzie Osbourne.
Speaker 13 (30:57):
You know me as it's depends darkness when I'm also
at the Prince of lower prices. Come on down and
see for yourself at the grand over your Ozzy Osborne Toyota.
Speaker 2 (31:09):
Is it in arc start this weekend, we're.
Speaker 13 (31:13):
Biting a head or four prices during the Oars Festive Savings.
Every car on the the loudest price lower than my
daughter Kelly's chance of doing a second album. A man
old two thousand and three toyotas are priced to movement
unbelievable prices rebates up to twenty five hundred dollars on
four runners, cameras, avalons and uh.
Speaker 4 (31:36):
What's that truck of service? Manager drives a fat guards
tato Toronto?
Speaker 2 (31:40):
What the too?
Speaker 8 (31:42):
What the heck does it mean to crime to coma? Yeah?
Speaker 13 (31:47):
Thanks mate, take a test drive, get a free coloring
book just like the one at my kitchen table. Plus
dip into my humped kid Jack's backpacket, grab a free
handful of whatever it is he's on this week. The
boss is full of Xenix. They've all got to go.
It's the grand Opening Blizzard of values all week long
with the old new Ausie Hosborne Toyota down there on
(32:10):
the uh down on the.
Speaker 2 (32:13):
What is it?
Speaker 14 (32:14):
Uh?
Speaker 2 (32:15):
You know over there that big more rocket roll.
Speaker 18 (32:26):
And now the moment you've all been waiting for, what
some folks consider the single best part of the John
Boy and Billy Big Show, a highly anticipated highlight that's
short of please. That's right, it's a break from all
the stupid right here on the really big shoe.
Speaker 3 (33:15):
Good morning, dumb and dummerer. It's uh, I mean the
Big Show is on the radio. If you said that, Hey, Kelly,
heymador baby.
Speaker 2 (33:26):
Doll, I want to hear the most annoying sound in
the world. Hey, boy's mini jail. Of course mader Man
brought his daughter up. That was a dumb thing to do.
Boy talking about gentleman jumper. You better watch it.
Speaker 3 (33:49):
That's the whole problem, man, Little sweetie Kelly, you're a sweetheart.
Speaker 2 (33:55):
I'll tell you what good were you? Born in Casmal County. No,
I was born gus only, North Carolina, Indian Billies. Sometimes
the apple does fall far from you. I want you
all to rub some of this redneck off on her now.
She's been living up Manhattan too long. In Manhattan, living
(34:17):
in Manhattan, living in Spanish Harlem, Spanish Harlem, YEP slightly frightening. Wow,
good practice for the show. Summertime. The Mexicans don't like
to sleep very much.
Speaker 3 (34:29):
Keep us up.
Speaker 2 (34:31):
So what do you do in Manhattan? She's a major farmer.
Speaker 7 (34:36):
I'm working on a few plants, a real big growth
industry in Manhattan.
Speaker 2 (34:39):
What do I do?
Speaker 5 (34:40):
Well, I'm an aspiring actress. So I wait tables.
Speaker 2 (34:45):
Ah wow, no, kid man, do you do you sing
or dance?
Speaker 10 (34:52):
No?
Speaker 2 (34:52):
That's why she waits tables.
Speaker 5 (34:56):
I've been doing some voiceovers.
Speaker 2 (34:57):
I've got a I've got a cartoon.
Speaker 5 (35:00):
Movie coming out in distribution in July.
Speaker 2 (35:03):
Tells about it is.
Speaker 5 (35:04):
It's called Alien nine. Alien nine, and it's anime, is
rated G. It's kind of like Pokemon, Dragon ball Z
kind of a thing.
Speaker 2 (35:15):
So what is your character?
Speaker 5 (35:16):
My character's name is Yuri Otani, and I'm a twelve
year old little girl. And basically, in a nutshell, aliens
ransack the Earth and three little girls are chosen by
their classmates to capture the aliens and save the planet.
Speaker 2 (35:31):
Oh yah, yeah, yeah, okay, I don't want to go.
Speaker 8 (35:40):
The aliens are scary again.
Speaker 2 (35:43):
Good practice for your parents on this ship. That's awesome.
Speaker 3 (35:47):
Well, I say we take advantage of this talent that
we have in the studio this morning.
Speaker 4 (35:51):
Yes, it's so rare to find any.
Speaker 2 (35:55):
I mean, let me get you're also thinking may first.
Oh good, good, Well, we're gonna use you.
Speaker 3 (36:03):
We'll play with on the on the game, on the
stupid quiz game or something. We will do Dollywood squares.
She's a celebrity starting in this summer.
Speaker 4 (36:11):
All right, made her ball z.
Speaker 3 (36:14):
Yeah there you go.
Speaker 2 (36:15):
Okay, good good, Well hang out, Kelly. I'm look sweetie.
I knew I liked it. I just didn't know what.
Speaker 5 (36:23):
Maybe it's character to series because she's young and females, right.
Speaker 2 (36:29):
We just found out. Yeah, I mean Kelly the same
sound are. As a matter of fact, jam or Daddy,
we're all aries.
Speaker 5 (36:34):
He's born the twenty eighth of March. I'm twenty six.
Speaker 2 (36:38):
I was born under slippery when went. He's an aspiring comedian.
Some time you have to be at the restaurant and
wait on the table, Joe.
Speaker 3 (37:00):
Al right, being nasty, but no, he's handing me notes.
I'm hot staff meeting one pm. Another one tomorrow, Appleman
seven fifty am phone in.
Speaker 2 (37:14):
He likes to comment on the show. All right, you
know Brashaw he's just not does good when he's jealous
of me. Do exactly well said?
Speaker 3 (37:31):
All right, okay, let me see what we do. We
headed toward cern events. Quiz time. This's the easiest way
for you to join the winners. Hang on easy one
coming up.
Good barning Big Show listeners. This is the Honorable Mayor
Merwin Q. Fiddle swap uh, I'm Missigan oh fiddle swoop.
It's a beautiful day in Dismal Seepach, South Carolina, and
it's even better when we're listening to the John Boy
and Billy Big Sal A mister Nah Big Show. But
that reminds me come on down for the forty second
(00:21):
annual Dismal Seepach Big Sal Festival.
Speaker 2 (00:24):
Yeah, that one spelled correctly.
Speaker 3 (01:00):
Good morning, The Big Show is on the radio for this,
for this wonderful Tuesday morning, Tuesday morning?
Speaker 4 (01:06):
It iss, what have you done with this ride?
Speaker 5 (01:10):
No?
Speaker 2 (01:10):
Why do you want to do that? Why do you?
Why do you you just revealing my side? Fill last night?
Randy So, I looked for a little entertainment.
Speaker 4 (01:18):
Okay, tell you what that I love you.
Speaker 6 (01:22):
You know you know that I respect you, and I
know everything you've done for me, and I couldn't be
more grateful.
Speaker 4 (01:26):
But really, just to get this her with hit me
in the face right.
Speaker 2 (01:29):
Now, I don't really know it.
Speaker 4 (01:31):
I'm not gonna be mad.
Speaker 3 (01:32):
No, I'm not gonna hit I'm not gonna hit you.
I'm not gonna head.
Speaker 2 (01:37):
You ez there, mclen it'll feel better.
Speaker 4 (01:40):
It'll be over and we can move on with a day.
Speaker 7 (01:42):
No, and there's always a chance you might actually feel
bad about it when you see it's.
Speaker 2 (01:46):
Frawled in the floor.
Speaker 4 (01:47):
It always feels a bad about it right afterwards.
Speaker 3 (01:49):
I always feel about about it. That's as say, we
got lined up today. I'm right here, right here, you go,
there you go, I got.
Speaker 2 (02:05):
This big boys.
Speaker 3 (02:06):
Yeah, will give you legs up for outbursts in minutes
Tuesday morning, everybody, the Big Show is on the radio.
Speaker 2 (02:18):
Here.
Speaker 3 (02:18):
It is April the fifteen. Listen closely if you plan
to play outburst.
Speaker 2 (02:22):
Isn't he wonder they along with us? Fake along with us?
And your aphilogy's not gonna right.
Speaker 3 (02:31):
Categories Yeah, yeah, yeah, we got a category from these
states in history, right. Leonardo da Vinci would have been
five hundred and fifty one.
Speaker 2 (02:40):
Happy buffday to me. I don't look at it, do I.
Speaker 3 (02:44):
I always think about a football coach, But which one
am I thinking about?
Speaker 2 (02:47):
When I hear Leonardo da Vinci? You think of a
football coach? We hear Leonardo da Vinci. I don't know
why weird? I don't know.
Speaker 3 (02:55):
It's a lot of things going on in there, boys.
Leonardo Leonardo DiCaprio.
Speaker 2 (02:59):
Yeah, Vince Lombardi. Ben's Lombardi.
Speaker 3 (03:03):
That's what Leonod da Vinci, Vincey Lombardi. See, Leonardo kind
of sounds like Lombardi. Vincey sounds like Vince. I bet
Vince Lombardi was named after Leonardo da Vinci.
Speaker 2 (03:15):
Well, when you put it that way, it makes perfect sense.
It's wonderful. Told you a lot of stuff going over
between these years, he says, leads to something.
Speaker 4 (03:24):
I can't wait to see what he just said up.
Speaker 2 (03:26):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (03:27):
Well, besides being a painter, he was an engineer, scientist, astronomer, architect, inventor, geologist,
and a botanist.
Speaker 2 (03:36):
Vince Lombardi was a botanist. I thought it was methodist. E.
Leonardo's most famous paintings were Mona Lisa, Mona Lisa, and
The Last Supper.
Speaker 3 (03:49):
His most famous invention would probably be the parachutevins. He
died May second, fifteen nineteen, at the age of sixty seven.
Speaker 7 (03:57):
You know, he did The Last Supper and later he
did a less famous Dogs Eating the Last set.
Speaker 2 (04:02):
It was weird.
Speaker 7 (04:02):
Yeah, Well, Judas had like the Acis Spades between his
toes was weird.
Speaker 8 (04:07):
That's wow.
Speaker 3 (04:08):
I've always liked that dog. It reminds me of the
NFL because of the dog pound.
Speaker 4 (04:16):
See, he was setting something killers. I think you owe him.
Speaker 3 (04:22):
On this date, in seventeen thirty eight, the bottle opener
was invented.
Speaker 7 (04:27):
Which is odd because the bottle was invented in sixteen
thirty eight.
Speaker 2 (04:30):
So people were going, finally it was me invention.
Speaker 4 (04:34):
Yeah, you know, the can opener was invented.
Speaker 6 (04:36):
After cans were invented, they used to beat them open
with you know, sharp objects.
Speaker 2 (04:41):
People were stupid back a bit.
Speaker 3 (04:43):
Well, boys, mother is the necessity of invention. Necessity is
the mother of invention. I didn't want to step you
run a wrong filler and final leg up. On this date,
in nineteen fifty two, the first bank credit card was
issued Franklin National Bank in New York. The card was
(05:04):
only accepted at local merchants, who would in turn offer
a discount for card users. The card was offered at
no fee to the bank's customers, but you had to
pay the entire balance off each month.
Speaker 7 (05:14):
And the guy would run his balance up to high
and they said, I'm sorry, sir, this was declined.
Speaker 2 (05:18):
Do you have another card, he goes hello.
Speaker 3 (05:22):
Seemed like a good idea, but due to the low
number of users and low profit margins for the banks,
the cards disappeared as fast as they had appeared. Then,
in nineteen fifty eight, Bank of America gave it another
world by rolling out with a named the Bank Americ Card.
Oh yeah, like other attempts, had offered card holders a
totally new element, the ability to pay over time.
Speaker 2 (05:42):
That's what I'm talking about.
Speaker 3 (05:44):
The card was wildly successful. Today, the Bank Americ Card
is known as Visa and is now by far the
most widely held an accepted.
Speaker 2 (05:50):
Credit card in the world.
Speaker 3 (05:52):
It is the closest thing there is to a universal currency.
Visa's aims to replace traditional cash and checks as a
third form of payment, and they just might pull it off. Currently,
there are over one billion cards issued worldwide, with an
annual transaction volume of more than two trillion dollars.
Speaker 2 (06:11):
A year to true.
Speaker 3 (06:13):
Trillion dollars a year. About that, Yeah, Visa pretty smart.
So good luck to Visa doing away with cash, getting
that one world monetary system, working on getting small enough
to fit in your right hand or forehead. Start everything with.
Speaker 2 (06:27):
Six sixty six right y'all have a good week.
Speaker 4 (06:29):
Well there's the visa count.
Speaker 2 (06:31):
One eight hundred big shows. You're told, free line if
you want to play out first.
Speaker 3 (06:35):
We got this big old prize bagage just waiting for
somebody to claim.
Speaker 2 (06:38):
We'll do it next.
Speaker 3 (07:02):
Good morning to make show's already all right, man, that's
amount of family's.
Speaker 2 (07:09):
Let's play out burst.
Speaker 9 (07:11):
It's the game that anyone can win, john boy, Billy
gave you from the big busby.
Speaker 2 (07:21):
Let's go consisting number one.
Speaker 10 (07:24):
Should have a y up against people love the best
time little big shots.
Speaker 3 (07:35):
All right, our first contenson in the morning, got a
Sylvannah Georgia.
Speaker 8 (07:40):
It's Robbie. We shot he How you going, eh, Robbie?
Speaker 2 (07:52):
How you doing? Man?
Speaker 4 (07:53):
How you doing doing?
Speaker 2 (07:54):
Buddy? Okay? And Johnson? Remember winning isn't everything is the
only thing, all right, Robbie?
Speaker 3 (08:03):
Just are you ready as you hear the legs up?
Are you paying attention? I was doing it thinking you
might get through, and here you are.
Speaker 11 (08:10):
That's right, I believe all right.
Speaker 4 (08:12):
You know what I love about this break so far?
Speaker 6 (08:15):
Billy jumps on your bandwagon with Leonardi being the coach,
and you laid down on it.
Speaker 2 (08:23):
Don't you know? That's the quickest way to get him
to move on to something else.
Speaker 4 (08:27):
It's like you didn't even hear him do it.
Speaker 2 (08:29):
Yeah, yeah, I'll be honest with you.
Speaker 3 (08:31):
I didn't.
Speaker 2 (08:33):
I was looking for my three items, getting ready to
ask Robbie say. It's one of my superpowers. I can
totally tune yell out. He's man.
Speaker 6 (08:44):
But we know it now because you have this little
tip off. You do this laugh like this, I mean,
I mean you were you wanted everybody to think you
had kind of like the laugh you just did before
you went.
Speaker 2 (08:59):
That's the way. All right, we'll good. Maybe I started
tipping myself off.
Speaker 8 (09:05):
All right, Robbie, are you ready?
Speaker 2 (09:07):
Yeah, I'm ready. All right, man, here we go. We
need three famous paintings. Ready go long.
Speaker 11 (09:15):
At least.
Speaker 3 (09:17):
My clans lose thing on the ceiling. Oh man, Robbie Stavid,
I trying to help you. Whistler's mother that helped. He
thought you were calling him gay. Oh yeah, I shouldn't
have used a randy whistle on. Hey Robbie.
Speaker 2 (09:44):
Yeah, hey man, you're still gonna get something for you.
Speaker 11 (09:47):
Hang up?
Speaker 2 (09:47):
How about that?
Speaker 11 (09:48):
All right?
Speaker 3 (09:48):
First time call?
Speaker 2 (09:50):
All right?
Speaker 3 (09:50):
See, Robbie just takes my word. For it moves on
perfect Jackie, make Robbie happy and not that way.
Speaker 2 (09:57):
Oh ask for his credit card. Dear Diary, this is Gary.
You see, I have the weirdest dream.
Speaker 11 (10:14):
The other night I was duct taped to an examination
table while a bunch of metal patients were mumbling gibberish
into my ear. Y y'all, turns out it weren't no dream.
I was just listening to wordy word on the Big
Show with John Boy and Milly. Someone needs to heard
those losers into the not okay corral.
Speaker 10 (10:39):
M h.
Speaker 2 (10:43):
M hm h, good morning the Big Shows on the radio. Well,
(11:10):
then my figure out when my dreams I can fly.
Speaker 3 (11:13):
No, seriously, I only flew naked once usually and he
really needed the right.
Speaker 2 (11:20):
Rick Flair was on the same right.
Speaker 3 (11:22):
Yeah yeah, but because usually when I fly, you know,
I discovered that I can fly like while I'm flying,
you know, so you know the scary.
Speaker 7 (11:35):
Thing is when he flies, he's usually naked, even.
Speaker 2 (11:38):
In like US airways. I mean, you know, because I
mean always. I mean, first of y'all have flying dreams? Yeah,
oh yeah, that's very colmon. Yeah I have. I've never had.
Speaker 3 (11:46):
Flying Okay, So are y'all confident in your flying skills
in your dreams.
Speaker 2 (11:50):
Uh see no, no, see, I'm not either.
Speaker 3 (11:53):
I have to learn it every dream. You don't have
to learn it again. Okay, I'm going down, pull up,
pull up, pull up? You know, dreamy now flying into stuff.
I had never crashed, and I found out I have
the ability to hover. But it's finding out to you
(12:15):
every time. Man, it's just so exciting. Have you ever
took somebody flying with you now that I've never done
tandem fly? You know, like when Rayford jumps out of
the airplane, they hook him on right in front of
the guy.
Speaker 2 (12:27):
Oh now who it wasn't Rayford?
Speaker 7 (12:33):
Anyway, I might have to get Vic Kenley dream doctor
in on my We may have already found that more
than we need I have.
Speaker 4 (12:41):
I'm done.
Speaker 2 (12:44):
Pillars is making fun of my dream. Fucking hover, Can y'all?
I rest my cat.
Speaker 4 (12:52):
He's got to be just a little bit better than you,
even in his dream.
Speaker 12 (12:58):
His dreams gotta beat your dream or that is ain't
gonna fly.
Speaker 2 (13:02):
Let's have a flying rais or not. And he's got
the ability to fly, but complains he's got to learn
every time he fly. Well, yeah, I'm already up, never
had to take off, so I'm gonna have to get
to better take off, take off. You wake up and
(13:23):
there you're late for your own dreaming session. I'm not
gonna learn to take off. I don't get to better.
Speaker 8 (13:30):
Sorry, I'm late have take off?
Speaker 2 (13:33):
And where's my clothes? I was made a hurt. Have
you ever landed? Yeah? Yeah, yeah two point landing man.
Speaker 4 (13:44):
Oh so you just kind of flitter down to the ground.
Speaker 3 (13:46):
Flitter, I don't flitter, Yeah, I got hovers and then
lowers jet to the ground. That's right, like like on him,
harrier jets.
Speaker 12 (13:57):
Are there people around the land, dear, so you're pooting
to bring you break your fall?
Speaker 2 (14:04):
Turn on my back. This may be where that crop
circles thing got started off.
Speaker 3 (14:42):
Good morning, the big shows right here on the radio
about corner away from the hour.
Speaker 2 (14:47):
Right, didn't bring in the Cape Muller, whatever may.
Speaker 8 (14:58):
My mind?
Speaker 2 (14:59):
Mind. Man drives around in a mini van, god a
wife and some kids.
Speaker 9 (15:05):
His whole life's on the skids.
Speaker 2 (15:07):
Hey, there there goes the married man.
Speaker 8 (15:12):
House.
Speaker 9 (15:12):
He feel Listen, dude, this poor guy's really screwed hanging on.
Buy a bread cord of milk, loaf of bread.
Speaker 8 (15:21):
Hey, there there.
Speaker 2 (15:23):
Goes the married man, got a big gas.
Speaker 9 (15:27):
Will, buys his clothes at the gap, and he's just
about had enough for this grid. Married man, married man,
friendly neighborhood, married man. Life for him has nothing wife
or let him do what they she says, it's about
timing groove up. Wherever there's a screw up, you'll find
(15:51):
the married man.
Speaker 7 (15:53):
As our story opens, the California Odyssey continues, the Action
Friends have just taken on the Osbornes in a celebrity
edition of The Family freakas TV game show.
Speaker 2 (16:10):
All Right, thanks a lot, everybody. That's a wrapping so
college buddy, how'd you think it when.
Speaker 8 (16:14):
We're number one?
Speaker 2 (16:16):
Osballs? Roule rocker roll? Does that answer your question? Gee?
I didn't think it was that bad.
Speaker 3 (16:23):
Hey, we got beat two hundred and fifty to nothing
by the Osbournes.
Speaker 2 (16:27):
Yah had old chucky girls, a little bit of naxious.
I like her mama though.
Speaker 13 (16:32):
Hey, good job guys. We have fun, no our feelings. Hey,
drinking god, you say you had some some scufs with you.
Speaker 2 (16:39):
Yeah, I cleaned out the mini bar back at the hotel.
I got him right here in my utility. Bell, I
like you big Guy. I like you, Devil guy.
Speaker 7 (16:48):
Okay, fellows cum big day tomorrow. We probably ought to
turn in.
Speaker 2 (16:51):
Hey, who's a buzzkiller? That's Captain Murray.
Speaker 7 (16:55):
Guy.
Speaker 2 (16:55):
He ain't a big drinker a nurse to be? Okay, mate,
let's rock.
Speaker 8 (16:59):
Hey, honey's there?
Speaker 2 (17:00):
Are we going all the way to daylight?
Speaker 3 (17:01):
Big girl?
Speaker 2 (17:02):
Can it sounds good to me?
Speaker 8 (17:03):
Hey, give me one of the mini models.
Speaker 11 (17:06):
I like you, big girl.
Speaker 2 (17:07):
She about halfway wild?
Speaker 7 (17:08):
But guy, married man, shouldn't we put a stop to
this jum. I wouldn't even know where to start. Come on,
let's just get on back to the hotel.
Speaker 2 (17:18):
Next morning, morning, married Man, You sure are up early.
I was just checking out the early morning news. Anything
big happening not really coming up?
Speaker 1 (17:30):
Looks like another beautiful la day on the way, Doctor
Fred will give us your action weather forecast. Action News
at daybreak continues after these messages.
Speaker 2 (17:39):
Good morning, Oh Girls Gone Wild.
Speaker 14 (17:42):
The world's wildest uncensored video series presents super Girls Gone
Wild feature eg America's hottest new superhero baby doll, Captain.
Speaker 2 (17:51):
Action Girl, wieheo, I'm the drunk.
Speaker 14 (17:55):
It's a full hour of the Kate Cutie Pie showing
off her Dynamic duo.
Speaker 2 (17:59):
Hey, y'all watch them with special celebrity guest star Ozzy Osbourne.
Speaker 7 (18:06):
Your roll?
Speaker 2 (18:08):
You telling me that?
Speaker 3 (18:10):
Oh?
Speaker 14 (18:11):
Super Girls Gunwild BHS video nineteen ninety five Director's Got
double DVD with three hours of special uncensored bonus features
Just twenty four ninety five to order called one one
hundred two Biggins, Get Loose, Get Wild, Super Girl's Gun Wild.
Speaker 3 (18:26):
Order Now okay, now can we go back home?
Speaker 2 (18:33):
You know that might not be a bad idea.
Speaker 7 (18:37):
Hollie Hendenburg looks like there is such a thing as
too much media exposure. Killed on again. Next time when
we'll hear Captain Action Girl.
Speaker 8 (18:45):
Say, I told you it was gonna work out, stupid.
Speaker 7 (18:49):
Captain Action Guy say, hey, my guys, I have free
DVDs for everybody, And.
Speaker 2 (18:54):
Ozzy say for good roll dog mess on?
Speaker 7 (18:58):
Next speak down, tightening Adventure, Same married Time, Same married channel.
Speaker 9 (19:03):
Wherever there's a school, you find the married mine.
Speaker 15 (19:10):
I stand on a hill, but not for a thrill,
but for the breath of a fresh kill. And never
mind the man who contemplates doing away with license plates.
He stands alone anyhow, Baking the cookies of discontent from
(19:31):
the heat of the laundra back then leaving his soul,
and then like in poetry, I go dot dot dot,
you know.
Speaker 2 (19:42):
Kind of horse center.
Speaker 3 (19:43):
Then I drop down, and then I go leaving his soul,
parting the waters.
Speaker 2 (19:49):
I'm damadulla our blocotta of.
Speaker 8 (19:55):
Mankind.
Speaker 2 (19:56):
If you're like that.
Speaker 8 (19:57):
Job boy, yeah, m.
Speaker 2 (20:30):
Good morning to make shows on the radio. Come here,
let us look at you.
Speaker 8 (20:39):
Letters. Oh, we get letters. We get your letters.
Speaker 2 (20:43):
Sappy nail and nail bad nails day, Reach.
Speaker 8 (20:49):
Right and pull what out letters?
Speaker 2 (20:53):
I love those letters, and that's why I watch.
Speaker 3 (20:56):
You got to say, oh boy, alrighty Jimmy dick out
of jessup. Georgia said, hey, y'all, this one of those
lessons learned. Leave the wild ones alone. We enjoy our
police beat and keep us on on the local happenings.
Pass it on the folks. Understand squirrels can't be trusted.
(21:17):
Is here a woman on Evers Road reported being bitten
by a squirrel. The victim told Debudyes that she had
been feeding the squirrel some bread on her porch. When
she leaned down, the squirrel attacked her hand, ran up
her arm and across her back. She yelled for help,
and her husband came and knocked the squirrel off her.
The squirrel then attacked her again, oh and was again
(21:37):
knocked loose. The couple went back inside their home and
watched the squirrel, which never left the front yard. When
the woman's husband came outside with a gun, the animal
was still in front of the porch steps. Man told
officers that he killed the squirrel because he was concerned
(21:58):
that it might hurt neighborhood children, and he kept the
body in his freezer pending instructions from law enforcement. See
I like that final play. She forgets about it, blasshom razor.
Speaker 16 (22:17):
As I have learned from firsthand experience, if you're bitten
by an animal and you call the cops, or say
your spouse calls them for you, and they send animal control,
which are police officers, by the way, be sure you've
kept the animal, otherwise that officer can force you to have.
Speaker 3 (22:37):
Of course, when you had the little chipmunks attack you
in your basement, that's right, Yeah, I mean, yeah, so
that was the thing to do.
Speaker 2 (22:47):
Keep keep kill it, keep it and kill it, keep
it to a wildlife.
Speaker 11 (22:51):
Yeah.
Speaker 16 (22:51):
They have to saw its little head off and cut
its brain into sections and find out if.
Speaker 2 (22:54):
It's maybe maybe she would enjoy that too. Oh right,
I'll be careful out there.
Speaker 3 (23:12):
Good Tuesday morning. The Big Show is on your radio.
Coming up, we'll hear the latest edition to the Celebrity
Motor Mile. What's this going in between Gary Busey's and
Ike Turners?
Speaker 2 (23:23):
Yeah? Right down the street? Yeah? Perfect? All right now
it is John Boygeborty time case.
Speaker 3 (23:28):
You misanswered yesterday's question saying you probably can't imagine starting
your day without it. Both from the early seventeen hundreds
to eighteen sixty two was considered a frivolous luxury fact
of British even collected attack from those who used it,
and many French people consider it unnecessary.
Speaker 2 (23:41):
Today the American Army.
Speaker 3 (23:46):
Soap. Yeah, yeah, that soap. It's good though, we've learned.
All right here soap? Good he got today? It's bad stinky.
Here's adjeopardy question. During the seventeenth century, the average woman
had thirteen of these What our teeth?
Speaker 2 (24:11):
But ment only had ten. No, what do y'all think?
Speaker 3 (24:19):
One night under a big show, you're told free line snow,
we're calling on good do we get a winter?
Speaker 2 (24:23):
Let's get on it. We'll play a neck. Good morning,
(24:51):
a big shows on your radio. All right, we're ready.
You got the money? Oh yeah, it's time. Yes, live across.
That's John Johnny Hoday and now you're host. His circle
of friends have an average of thirteen teeth. In fact,
they take turns sitting on his front steps on Halloween. Jeez,
(25:14):
John Moore. I say hello to David. Out of you,
poor you in Mississippi.
Speaker 3 (25:20):
Good morning, David Yay, good morning, Good morning, Sir David.
During the seventeenth century, the average woman had thirteen of these.
Speaker 2 (25:29):
I'm gonna get a hat, show us hats. Oh not hats.
I guess women back and did wear a hat, won't it?
Speaker 3 (25:40):
Oh?
Speaker 2 (25:40):
Yeah? All right? So David, I like the what you think?
Speaker 17 (25:44):
All right, appreciate it.
Speaker 2 (25:46):
Okay, you're welcome. Have a good day man, all right,
thank you for all right. Yeah, I'll validated. Maryland's up
out of Amarillo, Texas. Hello Maryland, Good morning. What are
you doing today?
Speaker 7 (26:01):
Just fine?
Speaker 2 (26:02):
Good? All right? Maryland's sitting there thinking what you got.
Let's say, dresses, show us dresses. Dresses, Maryland, how many
dresses would you say you have?
Speaker 12 (26:19):
I don't think I could count the numbad dresses.
Speaker 4 (26:22):
Is that right now?
Speaker 3 (26:22):
Back in seventy century, they probably probably wear the same
thing for a couple of days, huh, I would imagine.
Speaker 12 (26:27):
Well, I would think so, yes, probably, and it.
Speaker 3 (26:29):
Wasn't probably that many so maybe they weren't as freaked
out as about wearing the same thing as old Isabella
over there.
Speaker 18 (26:36):
So you know they stuck with that one pair of
jeans because they left most of their stuff up North.
Speaker 2 (26:41):
Maryland in seventeenth century. Yeah, travel like that.
Speaker 3 (26:44):
Yeah, all right, Maryland, Well, thanks for playing, okay, alright,
baby bye bye, Eddie out of Winston Salem, North Carolina.
Speaker 2 (26:52):
Hell, whoa weddy boy? All right, Eddie? What you god? Buddy?
Speaker 3 (27:00):
I got children, thirteen children, that's coact you were so white?
Speaker 2 (27:13):
Yeah, man, thirteen children.
Speaker 3 (27:15):
They wasn't worry about Rex, they won't worry about getting
out of the house working, and.
Speaker 2 (27:21):
It wasn't cable, so you know, yeah, what else you
have to do?
Speaker 9 (27:24):
That's exactly right?
Speaker 2 (27:25):
All right, you didn't hold on it, Jack can get
your information. We'll get it to you, all right, I did.
Speaker 8 (27:32):
Greetings, all this is big show.
Speaker 17 (27:34):
Legal counsel al Oficious Pete beagele Hole of the Beaufort
Bagel Hole. Some other shows have accused John Boy and
Billy of creating a morning radio monopoly, that it's profoundly illegal.
Oh that's hog wash. It's all perfectly legal, just like
(27:55):
the Big Show with John Boy and Billy.
Speaker 2 (28:28):
Good Morning to make shows on the radio gym. I
made a man coming by to check on two plants.
Mine's doing well. Billy's does have a little problem.
Speaker 3 (28:41):
Who knew when we put it right next to the
sprinkler head with about eight hundred pounds of.
Speaker 2 (28:45):
Pressure of water.
Speaker 7 (28:46):
Yeah, I would you do if you've been hammered by
a sprinkler head four hours.
Speaker 4 (28:50):
I went out there yesterday.
Speaker 12 (28:51):
It was after everybody left, and the mater plant wasn't
expecting anybody to walk up. I saw Billy's plant smoking.
That's because the John Boy plants eating all the fertilizer.
Now have you noticed, I mean, Johnny's is like a bush.
Speaker 2 (29:10):
I know everybody, so how many plants. There's just one.
Speaker 7 (29:13):
Fatter and fatter, And we had to put two steaks
on a John Boy just it's a multiplying baby.
Speaker 2 (29:18):
Yes see.
Speaker 4 (29:19):
And again I'll point out the John Boy plants getting
all the attention.
Speaker 2 (29:25):
So the apple doesn't fall far from the tree, and
neither does the major And I know you are saying
to yourself, what can we do to help? No, I
don't think anybody says, no, we need lady bugs. That's
Jim lay exactly.
Speaker 12 (29:40):
Let's ask people to bring an infestation of insects to
the building.
Speaker 3 (29:43):
Now, lady bugs, you put them, just doumble them out
on the major plants. Let them live there and they
eat the little afids, don't they well, aphids Aphis don't
believe in God. Oh so, so, anybody got some lady
blugs we're trying to get.
Speaker 4 (30:00):
Have you ever met anybody in your life that had
lady bugs?
Speaker 2 (30:04):
All bugging rivers? John Bo caught several, but they were
all mailed, they were all gone. There's a lot of time.
Speaker 4 (30:12):
Come on, Billy's plan.
Speaker 3 (30:15):
All right, we're gonna get the pictures of the major
plants on the world wide Web.
Speaker 2 (30:19):
I know you've been waiting to see them.
Speaker 12 (30:20):
As we need a little tiny ball cap to put
up on the top of the steak on the John
Boy Plant.
Speaker 2 (30:49):
Good morning, the big show is on the radio. How
do you This is Ozzie Osbourne.
Speaker 13 (30:57):
You know me as it's depends darkness when I'm also
at the Prince of lower prices. Come on down and
see for yourself at the grand over your Ozzy Osborne Toyota.
Speaker 2 (31:09):
Is it in arc start this weekend, we're.
Speaker 13 (31:13):
Biting a head or four prices during the Oars Festive Savings.
Every car on the the loudest price lower than my
daughter Kelly's chance of doing a second album. A man
old two thousand and three toyotas are priced to movement
unbelievable prices rebates up to twenty five hundred dollars on
four runners, cameras, avalons and uh.
Speaker 4 (31:36):
What's that truck of service? Manager drives a fat guards
tato Toronto?
Speaker 2 (31:40):
What the too?
Speaker 8 (31:42):
What the heck does it mean to crime to coma? Yeah?
Speaker 13 (31:47):
Thanks mate, take a test drive, get a free coloring
book just like the one at my kitchen table. Plus
dip into my humped kid Jack's backpacket, grab a free
handful of whatever it is he's on this week. The
boss is full of Xenix. They've all got to go.
It's the grand Opening Blizzard of values all week long
with the old new Ausie Hosborne Toyota down there on
(32:10):
the uh down on the.
Speaker 2 (32:13):
What is it?
Speaker 14 (32:14):
Uh?
Speaker 2 (32:15):
You know over there that big more rocket roll.
Speaker 18 (32:26):
And now the moment you've all been waiting for, what
some folks consider the single best part of the John
Boy and Billy Big Show, a highly anticipated highlight that's
short of please. That's right, it's a break from all
the stupid right here on the really big shoe.
Speaker 3 (33:15):
Good morning, dumb and dummerer. It's uh, I mean the
Big Show is on the radio. If you said that, Hey, Kelly,
heymador baby.
Speaker 2 (33:26):
Doll, I want to hear the most annoying sound in
the world. Hey, boy's mini jail. Of course mader Man
brought his daughter up. That was a dumb thing to do.
Boy talking about gentleman jumper. You better watch it.
Speaker 3 (33:49):
That's the whole problem, man, Little sweetie Kelly, you're a sweetheart.
Speaker 2 (33:55):
I'll tell you what good were you? Born in Casmal County. No,
I was born gus only, North Carolina, Indian Billies. Sometimes
the apple does fall far from you. I want you
all to rub some of this redneck off on her now.
She's been living up Manhattan too long. In Manhattan, living
(34:17):
in Manhattan, living in Spanish Harlem, Spanish Harlem, YEP slightly frightening. Wow,
good practice for the show. Summertime. The Mexicans don't like
to sleep very much.
Speaker 3 (34:29):
Keep us up.
Speaker 2 (34:31):
So what do you do in Manhattan? She's a major farmer.
Speaker 7 (34:36):
I'm working on a few plants, a real big growth
industry in Manhattan.
Speaker 2 (34:39):
What do I do?
Speaker 5 (34:40):
Well, I'm an aspiring actress. So I wait tables.
Speaker 2 (34:45):
Ah wow, no, kid man, do you do you sing
or dance?
Speaker 10 (34:52):
No?
Speaker 2 (34:52):
That's why she waits tables.
Speaker 5 (34:56):
I've been doing some voiceovers.
Speaker 2 (34:57):
I've got a I've got a cartoon.
Speaker 5 (35:00):
Movie coming out in distribution in July.
Speaker 2 (35:03):
Tells about it is.
Speaker 5 (35:04):
It's called Alien nine. Alien nine, and it's anime, is
rated G. It's kind of like Pokemon, Dragon ball Z
kind of a thing.
Speaker 2 (35:15):
So what is your character?
Speaker 5 (35:16):
My character's name is Yuri Otani, and I'm a twelve
year old little girl. And basically, in a nutshell, aliens
ransack the Earth and three little girls are chosen by
their classmates to capture the aliens and save the planet.
Speaker 2 (35:31):
Oh yah, yeah, yeah, okay, I don't want to go.
Speaker 8 (35:40):
The aliens are scary again.
Speaker 2 (35:43):
Good practice for your parents on this ship. That's awesome.
Speaker 3 (35:47):
Well, I say we take advantage of this talent that
we have in the studio this morning.
Speaker 4 (35:51):
Yes, it's so rare to find any.
Speaker 2 (35:55):
I mean, let me get you're also thinking may first.
Oh good, good, Well, we're gonna use you.
Speaker 3 (36:03):
We'll play with on the on the game, on the
stupid quiz game or something. We will do Dollywood squares.
She's a celebrity starting in this summer.
Speaker 4 (36:11):
All right, made her ball z.
Speaker 3 (36:14):
Yeah there you go.
Speaker 2 (36:15):
Okay, good good, Well hang out, Kelly. I'm look sweetie.
I knew I liked it. I just didn't know what.
Speaker 5 (36:23):
Maybe it's character to series because she's young and females, right.
Speaker 2 (36:29):
We just found out. Yeah, I mean Kelly the same
sound are. As a matter of fact, jam or Daddy,
we're all aries.
Speaker 5 (36:34):
He's born the twenty eighth of March. I'm twenty six.
Speaker 2 (36:38):
I was born under slippery when went. He's an aspiring comedian.
Some time you have to be at the restaurant and
wait on the table, Joe.
Speaker 3 (37:00):
Al right, being nasty, but no, he's handing me notes.
I'm hot staff meeting one pm. Another one tomorrow, Appleman
seven fifty am phone in.
Speaker 2 (37:14):
He likes to comment on the show. All right, you
know Brashaw he's just not does good when he's jealous
of me. Do exactly well said?
Speaker 3 (37:31):
All right, okay, let me see what we do. We
headed toward cern events. Quiz time. This's the easiest way
for you to join the winners. Hang on easy one
coming up.
Hosts And Creators
Billy James
Johnny "John Boy" Isley
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