May 26, 2022 • 39 mins
Devin and Carolina cover the very polarizing Kravis wedding outfits and then jump into the beautiful, tragic, pornographic, confusing and sometimes… boring world of Sally Rooney adaptations. Why can’t Frances make friends with someone she hasn’t slept with? What’s the difference between an awkward wombat and an awkward shivering deer in the woods (hint: one is hot)? Is Joe Alwyn a serial killer and did he play Billy Bob Thornton in a movie? Why can’t anyone in these shows be funny? These and many more questions are answered in this episode.
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:15):
Hello, and welcome to True Romance. This is a Devin Leary.
This is Carolina Barlow. Carol, how's it going you guys?
I am depressed as all hell, as all hell, I
don't even know what to do. I slept. I woke
up at two am last night. I'm in London. Hello,
and I woke up at two am. Couldn't get back
(00:36):
to sleep. My trauma is breaching like a beautiful whale.
P Is it PTSD? Is it the depression I've had
since I was eleven? Is it not being around my dogs?
We don't know. I was looking on Instagram and anything
about a couple was making me cry. I sent you
selling on Instagram. I feel like like I don't even
(00:57):
know what time it would have been your time, and
you like already were bonded L O L. And I
was like, oh shit, she's awake somewhere. She's out there somewhere. Also,
Caroline and I just like zoomed to catch up for
like half an hour, and I was like and then
I opened the notes for the episode and the first
thing is I'm depressed as all hell. I was like,
(01:17):
wait even say anything. I did take one hour nap
at my perspective on life has changed since then, but
I don't know what it is. It just hit me
and I'm a big power through person and I think
my antipsychotics truly help with that. So once in a while,
(01:39):
I'll just be doing something regular. In this case, yesterday,
I was at a soccer game and all of a sudden,
I was like, suddenly everything hurts mentally. Oh, I know,
it's that weird feeling where I don't want a boyfriend. Yeah,
that's it feeling talking weird, dude. But I want like
(02:03):
a friend even though I have you who. As I
told Will this morning, I was like, why can't I
just marry Devon? I know, but thanks for like wanting
me as a friend. Okay, so what are you trying
to say that you're looking for another friend though? No,
I'm looking for a hot friend as a guy who
I who is obligated to check in with me every night. Okay,
(02:24):
a hot friend as a guy obligated to check in
maybe like a Will there won't say that I can
have for the next two years until I am ready
to like fall in love with someone like one Harry
met Sally. Situation would be perfect now that I've said
that out loud. That is what I want. But it's
like so late to start a when Harry met Sally
thing like they started in college. I don't, but I
(02:45):
want to start now. And then like everyone's gonna be like,
why don't you date, uh buddy, And I'm like, buddy,
weird buds, what do you mean he's my buddy? Ha
ha ha, And then like one night we'll be talking
all night, like on his it'll be a movie moment,
will be on the hood of his car looking up
(03:06):
at the stars, like in a parking lot somewhere, and
He'll be like, what are you thinking about? And I'll
be like, do you ever wonder with us? If? Never mind?
Oh my gosh, that'll be New Year's Eve. We tried
to kiss and he blew it up, and I'll be
New Year's Eve up, Like what does that mean? He's
(03:30):
a terrorist? Turns out he was busy doing nine eleven
and then pipe bombs and he was a little brother
from the staircase. Oh my god, the brother in the staircase. Okay, yeah,
that was a good reveal where you're like, oh, wasn't
(03:51):
expecting that one. He was hot, But now he did
a pipe bomb pipe bamn. That guy is so hot.
He's basically a pipe bomb. There's like a potecase and
my pants. The Real Staircase Brothers are even hotter than
Arnold Schwartzenegger's son. The Real Staircase Sons my type. It's
(04:14):
the Real Staircase Sons. Colin Firth should get m a
just for making himself look so ugly American. I know,
and he does the voice actually perfectly, only as experts
would know. Okay, go ahead. Everything has been making me
sad couple of wise because I want, you know, like
(04:35):
my one Harry met Sally. But and I know that
you're gonna have different feelings about this. I think Travis
Barker is really hot. The wedding of Courtney Kardashian Travis
Barker looked insane to me. It looked like a parody.
Everyone is dressed like they're going to an Italian mob
(04:55):
funeral in the nineteen forties. They're in black lace, like
they're in more ning like the Godfather died. Travis looked hot,
he always looked hot, but it was so self serious,
like you. They looked like they were doing a Halloween
costume for the Adams family. Kim. I literally could read
(05:16):
Kim's face, which was, I can't believe Pete Davidson has
to do his last s and l show. I'm so
annoyed he's not here with me right now. I'm pissed.
Even though like there's nothing he can do about it,
I'm still mad at him and like this is still
gonna be a conversation. Oh my god. Yeah, And I
thought that Courtney's dress. I was surprised she went short again.
I loved her dress at the Courthouse wedding, like I
(05:39):
love a veil like that where it's kind of just
a scarf over your head. I think that's very romantic looking.
But her dress, as Chelsea Deavante is pointed out on Instagram,
her wedding dress that she woret for her official big wedding,
looked like it was supposed to be like underwear but
got cut in the middle. And I just couldn't stop
(05:59):
seeing that. All right, let me know when you're done,
and Dad, I want to hear your point of view.
This is my dream. D r e a M wedding,
zero notes, zero criticisms. Everything was perfect to me. Someone
texting me like, oh my god, what are your thoughts
(06:21):
on the Travis wedding, Like Chris was the only one
who looked good. I was like, I didn't even I
didn't even think about Chris. Chris looks fine. She always
dresses her age, which I like, Oh that's true. We
do like that about Chris, Like she's not like trying
to be like the Housewives wearing Erica Jane looks amazing
at the fency you know, Rihanna fashion show, But I
agree she's remote singer dressed as Britney Spears when the oops,
(06:45):
I did it again video will haunt me forever. Yeah, exactly.
So I loved everything about this. It was them number one.
It was them, okay, and I know by them, I
mean it was Travis and Courtney has changed her personality
to match Travis. But whatever, it was the epitome of them.
It was the epitome of like Hollywood trash, like they're
trying to do the Godfather, which I love. Like, I
(07:08):
just loved how much it epitomized what they would do,
Like it was like exactly what they would do. Also,
I thought Courtney looked iconic. Um, I thought all of
the outfit were iconic. Normally Chloe Kardashian Like, I thought,
Chloe looks good and you know what, like she did
wear a wet seal looking dress to the rehearsal dinner
(07:30):
or whatever like the first night was. But I just
thought every other person like on theme and I it
was in her usual black face? Was she? I only
saw pictures of her dress, But what did she do? Yet?
That she's white because she paint. If you see Kylie
without her three layers of tan on and Ariana Grande
(07:53):
is the same situation, you'll you'll be shocked to remember
that these are absolutely white. Girl. Well, Ariana Grande is
like latinas she not. This is gonna have to go
to Google because Kylie is white like Bruce. I mean,
Caitlin and Chris are both white. But no, Ariana is
(08:23):
Italian with Sicilian and a Brusse roots and a Brusise.
Someone's brus Someone said, is Ariana Grande Spanish or black?
The short answer is no, Although Grande comes from listen
to this Flora da a state that's twenty three Hispanic.
(08:46):
Her background is one percent Italian. Okay, you you got
me there. I I thought that. I don't know why
I thought that, because she paints herself, Devin. Okay, okay,
you're right, You're right, Um, okay, because she paints herself. Okay, Yeah,
(09:08):
So I love the Travis wedding. Um. I thought it
was hot Hollywood trash and I love to look at
that like it was what I needed to see. It
was everything I wanted to see, everything I needed to see.
It was an event, it was iconic, it was I
just I have no notes, like what did people want
to see her? And like a fucking boat neck Calvin
Klein dress, like Megan, what's that's the princess name? Megan's
(09:34):
so good. I had injured my shoulder right before I
saw that wedding and I hated that wedding. That that
wedding was gross to me. Okay, so we have different
go against Megan. I can't, Okay, I'm not against her,
but I'm against a boat neck wedding dress. Like. We
haven't even talked about dream weddings, and we will someday.
It's a little too depressing to do that single, but
(09:56):
let's just say I looked up June Carter and Johnny
Cash quotes about each other there this morning in my
depressive haze was bordering on tears the whole time. All right, Well,
let's just say that if I'm gonna be wearing a
wedding dress someday, you better fucking believe it's gonna be slutty.
So anytime I see the slutty wedding dress, true, any
time I see the slutty wedding dress like Courtney's cut
(10:18):
out underwear dress. Devon's gonna have whale tail at our wedding.
I'm gonna have them build a lace whale tail onto
the wedding dress. That is actually kind of cute. Okay,
no it's not. But anyway, those are my thoughts, um
and to go kind of in the opposite direction of
the excess, the glitz, the glam. You know, we talked
(10:38):
last week about the Manic Pixie dream Girl, which was
educational and inspirational. But in the weeks since, I have
completed a binge watch of something that has inspired me
to talk about a different type of trope, which is
a Newish trope. I call it the Manic Pixie plain Girl,
(11:01):
and she is featured in conversations with friends. She's going
to be in where the Crawdad thing, where the crowdad
saying I'm trying to think what else like has that,
But it's a very hipster I feel like it's the
hipster iteration of the mane poosie. Dreamgirl is the manic
pixie plain girl who wears like a linen crop top
(11:24):
that's buttoned all the way to the neck with vintage
Levi jeans, a brown, perfectly messy bun. Maybe some kids
zero makeup a cup or smaller, not that that matters.
I'm supporting. I obviously support sexualizing the a cup, but
continue and she hangs out in the library. She has
(11:45):
trouble at home, has trouble at home. This is the thing.
It's like, she appears like totally normal, good girl. Oh
she walks out with no makeup like that, she must
have no problems. She must have not a care in
the world. That's what I think when I see her.
I'm like, Oh, you didn't have to learn how to
paint your face at a young age because you felt
so sick about the way you look that you had
to fucking shelack your pores with Loriello cover girl, Then
(12:11):
you must have not a care in the world. That's
what I would think. But turns out, turns out they're
actually just burden upon burden upon their tiny little shoulders,
just burdens, burdens, burdens, and they're waiting for a complicated,
slightly toxic but yet attractive with insane sexual chemistry man
(12:37):
to come and save them. Okay, well this is where
But I think it's a paradox is that the girls
always feel invisible. The man of Pixie playing girl always
is the one who seems kind of lonely and seems
kind of like a wall flower. But at the same time,
she seems sort of out of reach for these guys
who end up going for her bad communication Asian, they're
(13:00):
missing each other, all of these things. If I feel
like a wallflower, you better believe I'm trying to catch
dick at a party. I'm not just hanging out the wall.
I'm perusing. I am looking for a single guy. I'm like,
I'm I'm not like, Oh, don't talk to me. You
(13:23):
wouldn't understand I'm lonely. You wouldn't understand these girls. I've
been up against my whole life. I have. I been
up against the shy girl. Oh all right, what was
(13:46):
I talking about? Okay, this is the thing watching conversations
with friends. I read the book a long time ago.
I read Normal People, and I didn't watch the show.
I hadn't watched any of these Sally Rooney ships, and
I just started my journey watching it. I'm lucky enough
that I started with conversations with friends. I didn't have
anything to compare it to, so I was truly taken
(14:07):
and like binged it. In a few days. I was like, Okay,
this is porn um and now I'm starting Normal People.
But I can picture every single like hipster guy that
I know. I live in Brooklyn. I went to vast
Her for almost two years. Yeah, count them, almost two years,
so I know the type of guy who watches this
(14:29):
and is like obsessed with these two girls who are
the stars, because I think because the Manic Pixie dream
Girl seems intimidating. That's why the men at the beginning
of the movie are like, um, please don't talk to me,
like please go away, because she's like hot and loud,
and so they feel intimidated. And then they're like, oh,
actually she's fucked up, so I can come in and
(14:49):
do my manly work of like taming her. The manic
pixie playing girl in conversations with friends and normal people.
Seems unintimidating, like she's kind of shy, she's she don't
have much to say. So the men can. Men can
approach her. They like come up and they're like, hey,
like what's going on, and they can dumb her. To
be honest, they can dumb her, not really in the beginning,
(15:09):
because actually they like barely speak and it's just like hey, hey.
But she's awkward, but not the way I was in
high school where it was like when I opened my
mouth it was full of braces with food stuck in them.
She's awkward in a way that's like I'm a little
bit nervous, like like, look off my shirt for me,
like a shivering deer, like a little fawn in the woods.
Like I feel like I was awkward, like a, um,
(15:33):
what's that thing called, like a a wombat or something.
It just like looks awkward. It's got like a big
snout teeth sticking out. That was our kind of awkward.
And then they're kind of awkward, is like a shivering
fawn in the woods, And so the men can swoop
in and then they realize she's complicated, and then that
keeps them like wrapped up in it. And I do
(15:55):
give credit to Sally Rooney for making the men also
like kind of sucked up. Um. Although conversations with friends,
I'm like, okay, it was like porn. But at the
same time, Joe Alwind gave nothing like I'm like, okay,
I don't understand nothing behind those eyes. I don't understand
(16:16):
what his emotional journey was at all. Um. But I
definitely was captivated by the main girl. And I actually
really liked Jemima Kirk in this, even though I feel
she might be a little bit unhinged and I was
someone needs to media training. She's tough. In her interviews recently,
(16:40):
she was like, yeah, this writer doesn't know anything about marriage,
year old writing marriage And you're like that maybe right,
but do you know that you're getting paid? Do you
know that this is a job. But also like, what
does she know about marriage? Like she was married? Oh, I,
(17:00):
like I said, I've been up against these girls. I
remember being in school. I went to Sarah Lawrence and
I remember going out to dinner with a group of people.
There was one of the thirteen cute guys and my
grade next to me grade class. I'm fourteen, and he
was cute, and there was this French brunette who was
(17:20):
so mysterious across from me. He was visually irritated that
I was in their presence, like I was this brash
and one girl who was like eating too loudly and
like asked too many questions. At one point, I just
kept up, I'm tired all the time. What's that about,
I'm like always tired. She looked at me like this
(17:43):
fucking idea, and she's like, well, the more you sleep,
the more tired you are. And I was like, oh.
The guy looks at me like what A doing here?
I was like, I'm boo boo the clown, like did
you I not tell you? Did I not tell you?
You're you are? Are for a birthday party? Your character?
Your character is um the guy with the beard and
(18:07):
conversations with friends, like the loud like friends that they
also have over in their country house. He's like, hey, man,
how's it god is? And then um, come on, you're
kind of Jemima Kirk in terms of attitude. You're right,
And I would be pissed like she was if so
(18:27):
at that bitch. Francis the only point where I become
not Jemima kirk Is. When Francis calls at the end
and then Jemima was like, are you having a hard time?
I would be like, death, You're having a hard time.
Good death. But I would not have been as graceful
as Jemima, even though I think I'm getting old enough
(18:48):
to realize complications in relationship not cool. Try me. I'm
not one thing that I want to say about normal people.
I don't want to spoil it for people who haven't
in it, but I will say that right now, as
I said, I'm lost in a Steve depression. And don't worry, folks,
I've been doing this since I was eleven. I think
I'll get out of it. It's just that time of
(19:09):
the season. But I will say that even looking at
quotes from that show on Instagram have made me cry.
And the most adult things I've ever been through include
near death experiences, you know, PTSD, financial planning, big eating
disorder years But I'm sorry, what the fact that you
(19:32):
included financial planning? And yeah, well that's just like a
normal adult thing. But it was really hard for me
to figure that out. No, but it's like it's as
traumatizing as everything else is having to do taxes go ahead,
and especially when I didn't do them for four years
and then caught up on them. I know remember like
(19:53):
I remember being in a party with you and someone
was like talking to us and they were like, yeah,
like taxes, like you just don't do them, and I
it literally was like, oh, okay, that was so funny.
I was like, we've got property taxes and she was like,
where are they going to find me? Rh bro. But
one of the harder things to really absorb, because I
(20:15):
just hate wrapping my head around it, is that there's
the realization that you can love someone and not belong
with them, and in some ways life doesn't care who
you fall in love with. Circumstances personalities can keep you apart.
Are my meds working? Circumstances can keep you apart? No? No,
(20:35):
it's true. And I haven't gotten to the end yet,
but I did read the book and that is what
is heartbreaking about it, and it's like they have this
amazing like chemistry, but they are both kind of sucked
up and it doesn't really work for some reason. And
that's just the way. That's just the way this story goes.
Um what song is that. Let's forget all that. I
(20:58):
don't know anyway, Um, forget all that. Indeed, yeah, forget
all that. Indeed, listeners chime in, what's that song about?
All right? But this is what I'll say. This is
what I'll say. Number One question from conversations with friends,
Why can't this girl make more friends? Why is she
only friends with I honestly think she has a personality
(21:21):
disorder based on the fact that she has no friends
besides people she's hooking up with or has previously hooked
up with. Like, go out and make another friend that
you can call, because it's like every time Joe Alwen
doesn't call her, she calls Bobby, her ex, and then
every time Bobby's mad at her, she calls Joe Alwen.
It's like there is a very sick and twisted game
(21:41):
going on here, Like yeah, you need to forget all that.
You just need to like go to the coffee shop,
meet someone, like what is it there in Europe? Somewhere
like coop and meet someone you fucking freak of nature
Starbucks and and start introducing yourself people. No, no, I
(22:01):
mean just go join a club. They're in college, Like okay,
what are you talking about what do you mean? What
are you talking about? Go join a club you're in college.
I joined clubs in college and then I never went,
but like, at least I made the effort. And then
I ended up just meeting people at weird parties and
people's basements, and then I didn't remember their name the
next day. But it was something. It's someone to call.
(22:22):
Had someone in my phone next day named Andrew question
Mark that I could call. Besides, like X is the funniest,
Like found numbers in my phone book when I was
drinking would be like full names. I was like, wow,
I was able to spell like Michael Silverstein. I was like, no,
no idea the far like far could not even tell
you where that happened. I am curious whether Sally Rooney
(22:47):
is a good writer or not. I liked normal people.
I liked conversations with friends. But so harken back to
our last episode. It's sort of like Garden State, where
you know we watched that movie. We read Sally Rooney.
You're able to understand everything. There's some sweet parts. It's
an easy read, easy watch. Then you think was that
even good? And I think that's my messages Everyone should
(23:08):
write because I feel like we could have all written
normal people. I kind of feel like that too, and
especially me because when I first started reading it more
than anyone profitably, and especially momstly me because no, because
when I was reading it, like I when I read
the book without the visuals, I was like, Okay, this
is a girl who was like unpopular and unattractive in
(23:31):
high school. And I know it's hard for some of
you believe, but that was me and only not your
big old schnas like the wombat you were talking about. Yes,
I'm saying like I don't. It's not like me being like,
oh I was ugly. It's like, no, I had surgery
to make my face look this way, and I didn't
just look this way. So it's like I was reading
the book and I was picturing someone like the old
me um, the old tailor that can't come to the
(23:54):
phone right now. And then I see this and so
I was like, oh, she's like unattractive and the popular
guy becomes into her. I can pick here that there
were popular guys had crushes on They never spoke to me,
but I can picture like if I was like, oh,
come like clean my mom's house, maybe they would Anyway,
then I see the show and I'm like, wait, this
is who is the unpopular girl? Like as test Sitsman,
(24:18):
a friend of the pod explained it, it's like, Okay,
Marianne is hot and rich and she's not even that weird.
In what world is she unpopular? Because you can be
rich and ugly and unpopular. I think we saw that
on my Super Sweet six team. Yes, and you can
be not rich and hot. Wait wait, okay, you can
(24:41):
be rich and ugly and unpopular, and you can be
and you can be stupid and have a podcast and
you'll be stupid of a podcast, and you can be
not rich and ugly and be unpopular, But you can't
be hot and rich and be unpopular in high school.
You just are popular. Then, so I don't understand. And
then like I guess it's like the guys in school
(25:02):
hate her because like she'll be like I think I
am too good for you. I don't want to go
out with you. I'm like, she's not even that crazy,
Like what what's happening? I don't understand? And he's like embarrassed.
There's like that scene where the other kid is like, hey,
you ugly bitch, like and I'm like, no, that would
not have occurred with this girl like Daisy Ecker Jones
is one of those stunning people I've ever seen in
(25:23):
my life, so that this whole thing lost me. But
then this is the thing you gotta buy into the world,
and and the reason you have to buy into this
world where it's like, Okay, she's unattractive and he's hot,
is because what really this is, as I said, is
porn and staying with conversations with friends. So it's like
I have to buy in. Okay, Joel Wents attractive, Okay,
(25:46):
Daisy Ecker Jones is unattractive, Like buy into that just
so you can watch the pornographic aspects. And it's too
depressing for me, and I gotta switch it up to
romantic scenes on YouTube. Gott to switch it up to
a girl who's cutting herself in Ireland. That's less that's
less depressive, that's less depressing. I yeah, I mean, this
(26:07):
is what I'll say too. And I've been thinking about
this a lot. I don't think I could ever be
with someone who's not funny. None of the people on
these shows are funny, at least funny people of all time,
like Joe Alwyn seems like a potential serial killer. If
you watch the show with that angle, you can see it.
It's like, I'm going to this guy's house. I'll compare
(26:30):
it to the Famous Girls episode where Lena Dunham bends
uh like two nights at Patrick Wilson's house uh in
the cobble Hill. At least he seemed like funny, charming, interesting,
like dynamic, and they looked like it like it was
also really hot. I literally, if I was in that situation,
I would like go to you and be like, okay,
(26:51):
I'm hooking up with this. First of all, you would
kill me, but second of all, I'd be like, I'm
hooking up with this really boring hot guy and it's
really awkward you and his name is Nick boring. Um No,
the least boring thing about him is that he's married
to Jemima Kirk and that she's like this talented writer
and then like I was like, okay, so he's like
an in cell. Like she's like, oh, I was getting
(27:12):
successful in my career and then he became really depressed
and so now I need him to have an affair
so he can be less depressed. And like, so this
is a show about an in cell, like okay, but
it's like, yeah, it is interesting. Both shows are kind
of boring and there's so much space in between the
hookups and it's like when I watched Okay, So here's
what I'll say, Like when I watch um like The Bachelor,
(27:33):
Bachelrette or like Married at First Sight, the episodes are
really long, so a lot of times I fast forward
until I see fighting, Like I'm like, okay, fast forward,
fast forward, Like they're just on a date and they're
talking about like their future and their finances, like fast forward,
fast forward, and then I see, like the fight. That's
what I did with this, Uh normal people and less
so with normal people so far, but more with conversation
(27:54):
with friends, like just okay, they're like at a party
seeing each other across the room, but they're not going
to talk. Fast forward, fast forward, fest forward. They're like
in a meadow looking out in the distance. Fast forward,
fast forward. Just get to the hookups because I don't
really care about her walking around looking sad. Also, Paul
Mescal Paul Mescal in every way, in every way and
(28:17):
every happy for him and Phoebe Bridges that they found
each other and also hate them because I want to
be with both of them. I just want to be
married to both of them in every way. No, it's
really shocking. Um, Daisy Edgar Jones looks like she parties
too hard, and I love that for her. Yeah, I
mean I think all the people in this besides Joel
and are stunning actually all in all the shows. Okay.
(28:38):
I actually wish we just had Tests on as a guest,
because she said another amazing thing about this where I
was like, what is ugly about Joe Alwan? Like he
is like technically attractive and like everything is like all
the ingredients are there, but like it's like it's just
not working. And Test said, I think he has the
same problem as a Oneona writer. They have young face.
(28:59):
And I was like wait and I go, wait, what
do you mean? And and she's like, when they're when
they were young at a certain age, their face was
perfect and perfectly attractive, but as they get older, their
face stays the stay stays the same and it just
doesn't fit on an older body. So she should have
earned a PhD for this analysis. Lizer Pewlitzer wait is
(29:24):
Pultz are like for something, don't to worry about it.
I don't need to worry about it. She I was like,
this is the most genius thing. Yes, because remember when
he was in Billy Bob's Halftime Show or whatever, like, wait,
what's the movie, um, Joe Owens like debut movie. Oh,
Billy Long's halftime walk. Yeah, Billy Billy Lynn's Long halftime Walk, Like,
(29:48):
but doesn't matter. Show was close, okay. I literally thought,
like Billy Bob Thornton had a super Bowl halftime show
and Joe Alwin was in it. I missed this. So
when this, I remember when Billy Lends Long half times
half time, Billy Long was hanging low. Um when that
(30:11):
came out, I remember he was like cute. I was like, oh,
he's cute. That's what his face was young and it
fits Now he gets older, he gets like a weird
beard and his hair is like misshapen and it's like
it doesn't work anymore. And looks humorless. He looks humorless.
He looks like a wet rag. He looks like whatever,
blank And I don't know. It's tough because it's like,
clearly Taylor is hilarious, like all the speaking parts of
(30:36):
Getting Back Together, She's funny. So never getting back together. Yeah,
I don't know about funny. I would say sweet, goofy,
good writer, witty, goofy, goofy, but he's none, all right, whatever,
we don't have to talk about it. But he's none
of those things, so morbidly depressed that he's always going
(30:58):
to have Taylor Swift stands following his and he's like,
you just can't feed into it, and I'm like, well,
then get out of the relationship because you should be
fucking boasting about it. And he can't leave or else
we'll get death threats for the rest of his life.
John marri and Jake Chill and all, I know that
is hard. I know. Last night we were thinking about
(31:21):
watching the movie Ambulance, and I was like, okay, but
Jake like it really did affect their reputation for me, Like,
I still will watch Ambulance, but I'm like, Jake, it's
hard to shake that. Yeah, it's hard to shake it off.
A ten minutes song about what if you think you are?
(31:41):
I loved you just like ten years later, I got
to reprise this resentment. I know, but it's good. She
still hasn't gotten her part, by the way, and she
never will do you have anything else to say about
these these Irish saga's. I'm also like, these are my people,
and I don't have any people that look like this,
(32:03):
Like I don't think Irish people look like these stunning
Like I just I'm like, oh, you just like walked
around Ireland and found like the three most attractive people.
This reminds me of someone named Claire de loon at
Clarabella on Twitter tweeted, we need a Sally Rooney character
with huge tits, and I hear that, like I need
(32:27):
a drunk girl in Ireland who's boisterous, who's boo boo,
the fool at dinners, who has her own depressive issues
and talks openly about them at parties, maybe too much,
maybe a mystery mystery mystery uh, and throws yourself at
the same two guys every weekend and has more than
(32:48):
one friend, and has more than one friend, has multiple
female friends, all of them try to give her advice
which she doesn't take. And that's those are my people.
Those are my Irish ancestors. I know it. Yeah, I
know it too. I wanted to end speaking of Ireland
(33:15):
with Kara Delvine's recent behavior. Oh my god, is she Irish. No,
but okay, but but Megan thee Stallion is. But Megan
the Stallion is one of your long lost Irish cousins.
I uh so. Kara Delavin is British. She comes from
(33:38):
a very like historically British rich family. Her grandfather was
one of the like forefathers of the Black and Tans. Now,
I don't know if you know what these are devins,
Like I missed that in my third year. Didn't didn't
(34:01):
have a third year at Mass. So the Black and
Tans were basically constables and another word I don't know.
They were a British army that were militarized and they
basically tormented the Irish. Okay, Irish for are fighting for independence.
(34:22):
And a friend of mine met Para Delvin's father. She's
Irish though she met Cardel Delvine's father and she's like
very like fun and boisterous at Wimbledon and she what
actually got along with him really well. That night she
has a dream that the Black and Tans are invading
(34:44):
her home and her mother said those were probably your ancestors,
like telling you what happened. Um, I'm just gonna say
this is not the conversation I wanted to have about
is Para Delvin has some historically and annoying roots, but
so recently she was at the Billboard Music Awards was
(35:06):
clearly on a drug called cocaine. H E L L.
Worst performance of all time at a music award show.
Miley has done this too, where people like are obsessed
with making the Stallion, which we all are, but they
everyone's like trying to take attention away from her or
like leech on leeching, like Magan the Stallion was playing
(35:32):
like Hockegirl Summer on stage once and Miley Cyrus went
out uninvited work on stage, and it's like this is
nothing to do with this is not your time, by
the way, and it's also you're not going to be
able to like stand on the sidelines and try to
catch coolness or like whatever you're trying to appropriate for
(35:54):
making the stallion. Karatt Delving is literally trying to lick her. No.
There's a great footage of the on the dance floor
at the met Gala and Cadublin is like trying to
look her and making the sellion literally pauses and pushes
her away like okay, stop, like stop now, get away.
It reminds me of like when Beyonce was bitten at
that party. Remember someone bit her and it was like,
(36:15):
who bit Beyonce? Like it was Karadellovin. I'll tell you
right now, you think so, I think it was Sana Lathan. No,
I know that there's theories, but I'm not trying to
say that. I'm just saying it's the same type of
things we spent the next hour. Yeah, at the Culprits,
my Google search bar is already full with Joe all
Win Billy, so I can't be starting googling something else
(36:35):
Billy Popcorn's aftime show. That's when I realized that Joel
was cute. Yeah, Joe alone just isn't gonna do it
for me. Um, Billy Bob Thorn does it for me
more than Joe all One does any any day, any
over anyone, because I hate myself bad Santo over anyone.
But yeah, Carodelovian is so fucking cringe disgusting. Also, what
(36:57):
are you wearing? Like? What? Everything about it was so
awful and embarrassing. It was like it hurt me to
watch that, Like Bethany Frankel said about Kelly ben Simon
after the Scary Island episode of Rony. She was like,
I fully expected after that trip to find out that
you were in rehab. Like when I saw the pictures
of Kara Delvin where her nostrils look like they're like
(37:19):
the size of hula hoops, I was like, Oh, are
you going to check into rehab tomorrow? Like this is great?
And you know what, it's upsetting because it's like what
you learn in life is like shame doesn't work for everyone,
and I'm grateful that it worked for me. I think
about myself just enough that I was haunted by my
actions and some people aren't. And that's yeah, just keep
(37:40):
really disturbing. Yeah, they can just keep going like never mind.
Um okay, So that's we have to say. We'll get
to the source of Devon's never mind someday. Thank you
so much for tuning in. Let us know what you
think about Courtney Kardashian's wedding to as I. I'm curious.
(38:02):
I'm curious. I haven't finished normal people. I'll let you
guys know what I think when I get to the end.
I bet you'll cry your titties off. I have considered
bangs multiple times while watching, So let's see if that
pans out. I know I look terrible with banks, but
I do keep thinking, like what if I could have
like a mysterious said I with a bang, the Mari
Salon in Beverly Hills, California. I gave them a percentage
(38:26):
of my rent, but they gave me my favorite haircut
of all time. I'm not I'm not gonna be going
to Beverly Hills for haircut, all right. I love you, Devin,
Love you, Carol Shue, Soon sorro M. Love me, baby,
(39:02):
don't leave me hangin. I want true os
Hello, and welcome to True Romance. This is a Devin Leary.
This is Carolina Barlow. Carol, how's it going you guys?
I am depressed as all hell, as all hell, I
don't even know what to do. I slept. I woke
up at two am last night. I'm in London. Hello,
and I woke up at two am. Couldn't get back
(00:36):
to sleep. My trauma is breaching like a beautiful whale.
P Is it PTSD? Is it the depression I've had
since I was eleven? Is it not being around my dogs?
We don't know. I was looking on Instagram and anything
about a couple was making me cry. I sent you
selling on Instagram. I feel like like I don't even
(00:57):
know what time it would have been your time, and
you like already were bonded L O L. And I
was like, oh shit, she's awake somewhere. She's out there somewhere. Also,
Caroline and I just like zoomed to catch up for
like half an hour, and I was like and then
I opened the notes for the episode and the first
thing is I'm depressed as all hell. I was like,
(01:17):
wait even say anything. I did take one hour nap
at my perspective on life has changed since then, but
I don't know what it is. It just hit me
and I'm a big power through person and I think
my antipsychotics truly help with that. So once in a while,
(01:39):
I'll just be doing something regular. In this case, yesterday,
I was at a soccer game and all of a sudden,
I was like, suddenly everything hurts mentally. Oh, I know,
it's that weird feeling where I don't want a boyfriend. Yeah,
that's it feeling talking weird, dude. But I want like
(02:03):
a friend even though I have you who. As I
told Will this morning, I was like, why can't I
just marry Devon? I know, but thanks for like wanting
me as a friend. Okay, so what are you trying
to say that you're looking for another friend though? No,
I'm looking for a hot friend as a guy who
I who is obligated to check in with me every night. Okay,
(02:24):
a hot friend as a guy obligated to check in
maybe like a Will there won't say that I can
have for the next two years until I am ready
to like fall in love with someone like one Harry
met Sally. Situation would be perfect now that I've said
that out loud. That is what I want. But it's
like so late to start a when Harry met Sally
thing like they started in college. I don't, but I
(02:45):
want to start now. And then like everyone's gonna be like,
why don't you date, uh buddy, And I'm like, buddy,
weird buds, what do you mean he's my buddy? Ha
ha ha, And then like one night we'll be talking
all night, like on his it'll be a movie moment,
will be on the hood of his car looking up
(03:06):
at the stars, like in a parking lot somewhere, and
He'll be like, what are you thinking about? And I'll
be like, do you ever wonder with us? If? Never mind?
Oh my gosh, that'll be New Year's Eve. We tried
to kiss and he blew it up, and I'll be
New Year's Eve up, Like what does that mean? He's
(03:30):
a terrorist? Turns out he was busy doing nine eleven
and then pipe bombs and he was a little brother
from the staircase. Oh my god, the brother in the staircase. Okay, yeah,
that was a good reveal where you're like, oh, wasn't
(03:51):
expecting that one. He was hot, But now he did
a pipe bomb pipe bamn. That guy is so hot.
He's basically a pipe bomb. There's like a potecase and
my pants. The Real Staircase Brothers are even hotter than
Arnold Schwartzenegger's son. The Real Staircase Sons my type. It's
(04:14):
the Real Staircase Sons. Colin Firth should get m a
just for making himself look so ugly American. I know,
and he does the voice actually perfectly, only as experts
would know. Okay, go ahead. Everything has been making me
sad couple of wise because I want, you know, like
(04:35):
my one Harry met Sally. But and I know that
you're gonna have different feelings about this. I think Travis
Barker is really hot. The wedding of Courtney Kardashian Travis
Barker looked insane to me. It looked like a parody.
Everyone is dressed like they're going to an Italian mob
(04:55):
funeral in the nineteen forties. They're in black lace, like
they're in more ning like the Godfather died. Travis looked hot,
he always looked hot, but it was so self serious,
like you. They looked like they were doing a Halloween
costume for the Adams family. Kim. I literally could read
(05:16):
Kim's face, which was, I can't believe Pete Davidson has
to do his last s and l show. I'm so
annoyed he's not here with me right now. I'm pissed.
Even though like there's nothing he can do about it,
I'm still mad at him and like this is still
gonna be a conversation. Oh my god. Yeah, And I
thought that Courtney's dress. I was surprised she went short again.
I loved her dress at the Courthouse wedding, like I
(05:39):
love a veil like that where it's kind of just
a scarf over your head. I think that's very romantic looking.
But her dress, as Chelsea Deavante is pointed out on Instagram,
her wedding dress that she woret for her official big wedding,
looked like it was supposed to be like underwear but
got cut in the middle. And I just couldn't stop
(05:59):
seeing that. All right, let me know when you're done,
and Dad, I want to hear your point of view.
This is my dream. D r e a M wedding,
zero notes, zero criticisms. Everything was perfect to me. Someone
texting me like, oh my god, what are your thoughts
(06:21):
on the Travis wedding, Like Chris was the only one
who looked good. I was like, I didn't even I
didn't even think about Chris. Chris looks fine. She always
dresses her age, which I like, Oh that's true. We
do like that about Chris, Like she's not like trying
to be like the Housewives wearing Erica Jane looks amazing
at the fency you know, Rihanna fashion show, But I
agree she's remote singer dressed as Britney Spears when the oops,
(06:45):
I did it again video will haunt me forever. Yeah, exactly.
So I loved everything about this. It was them number one.
It was them, okay, and I know by them, I
mean it was Travis and Courtney has changed her personality
to match Travis. But whatever, it was the epitome of them.
It was the epitome of like Hollywood trash, like they're
trying to do the Godfather, which I love. Like, I
(07:08):
just loved how much it epitomized what they would do,
Like it was like exactly what they would do. Also,
I thought Courtney looked iconic. Um, I thought all of
the outfit were iconic. Normally Chloe Kardashian Like, I thought,
Chloe looks good and you know what, like she did
wear a wet seal looking dress to the rehearsal dinner
(07:30):
or whatever like the first night was. But I just
thought every other person like on theme and I it
was in her usual black face? Was she? I only
saw pictures of her dress, But what did she do? Yet?
That she's white because she paint. If you see Kylie
without her three layers of tan on and Ariana Grande
(07:53):
is the same situation, you'll you'll be shocked to remember
that these are absolutely white. Girl. Well, Ariana Grande is
like latinas she not. This is gonna have to go
to Google because Kylie is white like Bruce. I mean,
Caitlin and Chris are both white. But no, Ariana is
(08:23):
Italian with Sicilian and a Brusse roots and a Brusise.
Someone's brus Someone said, is Ariana Grande Spanish or black?
The short answer is no, Although Grande comes from listen
to this Flora da a state that's twenty three Hispanic.
(08:46):
Her background is one percent Italian. Okay, you you got
me there. I I thought that. I don't know why
I thought that, because she paints herself, Devin. Okay, okay,
you're right, You're right, Um, okay, because she paints herself. Okay, Yeah,
(09:08):
So I love the Travis wedding. Um. I thought it
was hot Hollywood trash and I love to look at
that like it was what I needed to see. It
was everything I wanted to see, everything I needed to see.
It was an event, it was iconic, it was I
just I have no notes, like what did people want
to see her? And like a fucking boat neck Calvin
Klein dress, like Megan, what's that's the princess name? Megan's
(09:34):
so good. I had injured my shoulder right before I
saw that wedding and I hated that wedding. That that
wedding was gross to me. Okay, so we have different
go against Megan. I can't, Okay, I'm not against her,
but I'm against a boat neck wedding dress. Like. We
haven't even talked about dream weddings, and we will someday.
It's a little too depressing to do that single, but
(09:56):
let's just say I looked up June Carter and Johnny
Cash quotes about each other there this morning in my
depressive haze was bordering on tears the whole time. All right, Well,
let's just say that if I'm gonna be wearing a
wedding dress someday, you better fucking believe it's gonna be slutty.
So anytime I see the slutty wedding dress, true, any
time I see the slutty wedding dress like Courtney's cut
(10:18):
out underwear dress. Devon's gonna have whale tail at our wedding.
I'm gonna have them build a lace whale tail onto
the wedding dress. That is actually kind of cute. Okay,
no it's not. But anyway, those are my thoughts, um
and to go kind of in the opposite direction of
the excess, the glitz, the glam. You know, we talked
(10:38):
last week about the Manic Pixie dream Girl, which was
educational and inspirational. But in the weeks since, I have
completed a binge watch of something that has inspired me
to talk about a different type of trope, which is
a Newish trope. I call it the Manic Pixie plain Girl,
(11:01):
and she is featured in conversations with friends. She's going
to be in where the Crawdad thing, where the crowdad
saying I'm trying to think what else like has that,
But it's a very hipster I feel like it's the
hipster iteration of the mane poosie. Dreamgirl is the manic
pixie plain girl who wears like a linen crop top
(11:24):
that's buttoned all the way to the neck with vintage
Levi jeans, a brown, perfectly messy bun. Maybe some kids
zero makeup a cup or smaller, not that that matters.
I'm supporting. I obviously support sexualizing the a cup, but
continue and she hangs out in the library. She has
(11:45):
trouble at home, has trouble at home. This is the thing.
It's like, she appears like totally normal, good girl. Oh
she walks out with no makeup like that, she must
have no problems. She must have not a care in
the world. That's what I think when I see her.
I'm like, Oh, you didn't have to learn how to
paint your face at a young age because you felt
so sick about the way you look that you had
to fucking shelack your pores with Loriello cover girl, Then
(12:11):
you must have not a care in the world. That's
what I would think. But turns out, turns out they're
actually just burden upon burden upon their tiny little shoulders,
just burdens, burdens, burdens, and they're waiting for a complicated,
slightly toxic but yet attractive with insane sexual chemistry man
(12:37):
to come and save them. Okay, well this is where
But I think it's a paradox is that the girls
always feel invisible. The man of Pixie playing girl always
is the one who seems kind of lonely and seems
kind of like a wall flower. But at the same time,
she seems sort of out of reach for these guys
who end up going for her bad communication Asian, they're
(13:00):
missing each other, all of these things. If I feel
like a wallflower, you better believe I'm trying to catch
dick at a party. I'm not just hanging out the wall.
I'm perusing. I am looking for a single guy. I'm like,
I'm I'm not like, Oh, don't talk to me. You
(13:23):
wouldn't understand I'm lonely. You wouldn't understand these girls. I've
been up against my whole life. I have. I been
up against the shy girl. Oh all right, what was
(13:46):
I talking about? Okay, this is the thing watching conversations
with friends. I read the book a long time ago.
I read Normal People, and I didn't watch the show.
I hadn't watched any of these Sally Rooney ships, and
I just started my journey watching it. I'm lucky enough
that I started with conversations with friends. I didn't have
anything to compare it to, so I was truly taken
(14:07):
and like binged it. In a few days. I was like, Okay,
this is porn um and now I'm starting Normal People.
But I can picture every single like hipster guy that
I know. I live in Brooklyn. I went to vast
Her for almost two years. Yeah, count them, almost two years,
so I know the type of guy who watches this
(14:29):
and is like obsessed with these two girls who are
the stars, because I think because the Manic Pixie dream
Girl seems intimidating. That's why the men at the beginning
of the movie are like, um, please don't talk to me,
like please go away, because she's like hot and loud,
and so they feel intimidated. And then they're like, oh,
actually she's fucked up, so I can come in and
(14:49):
do my manly work of like taming her. The manic
pixie playing girl in conversations with friends and normal people.
Seems unintimidating, like she's kind of shy, she's she don't
have much to say. So the men can. Men can
approach her. They like come up and they're like, hey,
like what's going on, and they can dumb her. To
be honest, they can dumb her, not really in the beginning,
(15:09):
because actually they like barely speak and it's just like hey, hey.
But she's awkward, but not the way I was in
high school where it was like when I opened my
mouth it was full of braces with food stuck in them.
She's awkward in a way that's like I'm a little
bit nervous, like like, look off my shirt for me,
like a shivering deer, like a little fawn in the woods.
Like I feel like I was awkward, like a, um,
(15:33):
what's that thing called, like a a wombat or something.
It just like looks awkward. It's got like a big
snout teeth sticking out. That was our kind of awkward.
And then they're kind of awkward, is like a shivering
fawn in the woods, And so the men can swoop
in and then they realize she's complicated, and then that
keeps them like wrapped up in it. And I do
(15:55):
give credit to Sally Rooney for making the men also
like kind of sucked up. Um. Although conversations with friends,
I'm like, okay, it was like porn. But at the
same time, Joe Alwind gave nothing like I'm like, okay,
I don't understand nothing behind those eyes. I don't understand
(16:16):
what his emotional journey was at all. Um. But I
definitely was captivated by the main girl. And I actually
really liked Jemima Kirk in this, even though I feel
she might be a little bit unhinged and I was
someone needs to media training. She's tough. In her interviews recently,
(16:40):
she was like, yeah, this writer doesn't know anything about marriage,
year old writing marriage And you're like that maybe right,
but do you know that you're getting paid? Do you
know that this is a job. But also like, what
does she know about marriage? Like she was married? Oh, I,
(17:00):
like I said, I've been up against these girls. I
remember being in school. I went to Sarah Lawrence and
I remember going out to dinner with a group of people.
There was one of the thirteen cute guys and my
grade next to me grade class. I'm fourteen, and he
was cute, and there was this French brunette who was
(17:20):
so mysterious across from me. He was visually irritated that
I was in their presence, like I was this brash
and one girl who was like eating too loudly and
like asked too many questions. At one point, I just
kept up, I'm tired all the time. What's that about,
I'm like always tired. She looked at me like this
(17:43):
fucking idea, and she's like, well, the more you sleep,
the more tired you are. And I was like, oh.
The guy looks at me like what A doing here?
I was like, I'm boo boo the clown, like did
you I not tell you? Did I not tell you?
You're you are? Are for a birthday party? Your character?
Your character is um the guy with the beard and
(18:07):
conversations with friends, like the loud like friends that they
also have over in their country house. He's like, hey, man,
how's it god is? And then um, come on, you're
kind of Jemima Kirk in terms of attitude. You're right,
And I would be pissed like she was if so
(18:27):
at that bitch. Francis the only point where I become
not Jemima kirk Is. When Francis calls at the end
and then Jemima was like, are you having a hard time?
I would be like, death, You're having a hard time.
Good death. But I would not have been as graceful
as Jemima, even though I think I'm getting old enough
(18:48):
to realize complications in relationship not cool. Try me. I'm
not one thing that I want to say about normal people.
I don't want to spoil it for people who haven't
in it, but I will say that right now, as
I said, I'm lost in a Steve depression. And don't worry, folks,
I've been doing this since I was eleven. I think
I'll get out of it. It's just that time of
(19:09):
the season. But I will say that even looking at
quotes from that show on Instagram have made me cry.
And the most adult things I've ever been through include
near death experiences, you know, PTSD, financial planning, big eating
disorder years But I'm sorry, what the fact that you
(19:32):
included financial planning? And yeah, well that's just like a
normal adult thing. But it was really hard for me
to figure that out. No, but it's like it's as
traumatizing as everything else is having to do taxes go ahead,
and especially when I didn't do them for four years
and then caught up on them. I know remember like
(19:53):
I remember being in a party with you and someone
was like talking to us and they were like, yeah,
like taxes, like you just don't do them, and I
it literally was like, oh, okay, that was so funny.
I was like, we've got property taxes and she was like,
where are they going to find me? Rh bro. But
one of the harder things to really absorb, because I
(20:15):
just hate wrapping my head around it, is that there's
the realization that you can love someone and not belong
with them, and in some ways life doesn't care who
you fall in love with. Circumstances personalities can keep you apart.
Are my meds working? Circumstances can keep you apart? No? No,
(20:35):
it's true. And I haven't gotten to the end yet,
but I did read the book and that is what
is heartbreaking about it, and it's like they have this
amazing like chemistry, but they are both kind of sucked
up and it doesn't really work for some reason. And
that's just the way. That's just the way this story goes.
Um what song is that. Let's forget all that. I
(20:58):
don't know anyway, Um, forget all that. Indeed, yeah, forget
all that. Indeed, listeners chime in, what's that song about?
All right? But this is what I'll say. This is
what I'll say. Number One question from conversations with friends,
Why can't this girl make more friends? Why is she
only friends with I honestly think she has a personality
(21:21):
disorder based on the fact that she has no friends
besides people she's hooking up with or has previously hooked
up with. Like, go out and make another friend that
you can call, because it's like every time Joe Alwen
doesn't call her, she calls Bobby, her ex, and then
every time Bobby's mad at her, she calls Joe Alwen.
It's like there is a very sick and twisted game
(21:41):
going on here, Like yeah, you need to forget all that.
You just need to like go to the coffee shop,
meet someone, like what is it there in Europe? Somewhere
like coop and meet someone you fucking freak of nature
Starbucks and and start introducing yourself people. No, no, I
(22:01):
mean just go join a club. They're in college, Like okay,
what are you talking about what do you mean? What
are you talking about? Go join a club you're in college.
I joined clubs in college and then I never went,
but like, at least I made the effort. And then
I ended up just meeting people at weird parties and
people's basements, and then I didn't remember their name the
next day. But it was something. It's someone to call.
(22:22):
Had someone in my phone next day named Andrew question
Mark that I could call. Besides, like X is the funniest,
Like found numbers in my phone book when I was
drinking would be like full names. I was like, wow,
I was able to spell like Michael Silverstein. I was like, no,
no idea the far like far could not even tell
you where that happened. I am curious whether Sally Rooney
(22:47):
is a good writer or not. I liked normal people.
I liked conversations with friends. But so harken back to
our last episode. It's sort of like Garden State, where
you know we watched that movie. We read Sally Rooney.
You're able to understand everything. There's some sweet parts. It's
an easy read, easy watch. Then you think was that
even good? And I think that's my messages Everyone should
(23:08):
write because I feel like we could have all written
normal people. I kind of feel like that too, and
especially me because when I first started reading it more
than anyone profitably, and especially momstly me because no, because
when I was reading it, like I when I read
the book without the visuals, I was like, Okay, this
is a girl who was like unpopular and unattractive in
(23:31):
high school. And I know it's hard for some of
you believe, but that was me and only not your
big old schnas like the wombat you were talking about. Yes,
I'm saying like I don't. It's not like me being like,
oh I was ugly. It's like, no, I had surgery
to make my face look this way, and I didn't
just look this way. So it's like I was reading
the book and I was picturing someone like the old
me um, the old tailor that can't come to the
(23:54):
phone right now. And then I see this and so
I was like, oh, she's like unattractive and the popular
guy becomes into her. I can pick here that there
were popular guys had crushes on They never spoke to me,
but I can picture like if I was like, oh,
come like clean my mom's house, maybe they would Anyway,
then I see the show and I'm like, wait, this
is who is the unpopular girl? Like as test Sitsman,
(24:18):
a friend of the pod explained it, it's like, Okay,
Marianne is hot and rich and she's not even that weird.
In what world is she unpopular? Because you can be
rich and ugly and unpopular. I think we saw that
on my Super Sweet six team. Yes, and you can
be not rich and hot. Wait wait, okay, you can
(24:41):
be rich and ugly and unpopular, and you can be
and you can be stupid and have a podcast and
you'll be stupid of a podcast, and you can be
not rich and ugly and be unpopular, But you can't
be hot and rich and be unpopular in high school.
You just are popular. Then, so I don't understand. And
then like I guess it's like the guys in school
(25:02):
hate her because like she'll be like I think I
am too good for you. I don't want to go
out with you. I'm like, she's not even that crazy,
Like what what's happening? I don't understand? And he's like embarrassed.
There's like that scene where the other kid is like, hey,
you ugly bitch, like and I'm like, no, that would
not have occurred with this girl like Daisy Ecker Jones
is one of those stunning people I've ever seen in
(25:23):
my life, so that this whole thing lost me. But
then this is the thing you gotta buy into the world,
and and the reason you have to buy into this
world where it's like, Okay, she's unattractive and he's hot,
is because what really this is, as I said, is
porn and staying with conversations with friends. So it's like
I have to buy in. Okay, Joel Wents attractive, Okay,
(25:46):
Daisy Ecker Jones is unattractive, Like buy into that just
so you can watch the pornographic aspects. And it's too
depressing for me, and I gotta switch it up to
romantic scenes on YouTube. Gott to switch it up to
a girl who's cutting herself in Ireland. That's less that's
less depressive, that's less depressing. I yeah, I mean, this
(26:07):
is what I'll say too. And I've been thinking about
this a lot. I don't think I could ever be
with someone who's not funny. None of the people on
these shows are funny, at least funny people of all time,
like Joe Alwyn seems like a potential serial killer. If
you watch the show with that angle, you can see it.
It's like, I'm going to this guy's house. I'll compare
(26:30):
it to the Famous Girls episode where Lena Dunham bends
uh like two nights at Patrick Wilson's house uh in
the cobble Hill. At least he seemed like funny, charming, interesting,
like dynamic, and they looked like it like it was
also really hot. I literally, if I was in that situation,
I would like go to you and be like, okay,
(26:51):
I'm hooking up with this. First of all, you would
kill me, but second of all, I'd be like, I'm
hooking up with this really boring hot guy and it's
really awkward you and his name is Nick boring. Um No,
the least boring thing about him is that he's married
to Jemima Kirk and that she's like this talented writer
and then like I was like, okay, so he's like
an in cell. Like she's like, oh, I was getting
(27:12):
successful in my career and then he became really depressed
and so now I need him to have an affair
so he can be less depressed. And like, so this
is a show about an in cell, like okay, but
it's like, yeah, it is interesting. Both shows are kind
of boring and there's so much space in between the
hookups and it's like when I watched Okay, So here's
what I'll say, Like when I watch um like The Bachelor,
(27:33):
Bachelrette or like Married at First Sight, the episodes are
really long, so a lot of times I fast forward
until I see fighting, Like I'm like, okay, fast forward,
fast forward, Like they're just on a date and they're
talking about like their future and their finances, like fast forward,
fast forward, and then I see, like the fight. That's
what I did with this, Uh normal people and less
so with normal people so far, but more with conversation
(27:54):
with friends, like just okay, they're like at a party
seeing each other across the room, but they're not going
to talk. Fast forward, fast forward, fest forward. They're like
in a meadow looking out in the distance. Fast forward,
fast forward. Just get to the hookups because I don't
really care about her walking around looking sad. Also, Paul
Mescal Paul Mescal in every way, in every way and
(28:17):
every happy for him and Phoebe Bridges that they found
each other and also hate them because I want to
be with both of them. I just want to be
married to both of them in every way. No, it's
really shocking. Um, Daisy Edgar Jones looks like she parties
too hard, and I love that for her. Yeah, I
mean I think all the people in this besides Joel
and are stunning actually all in all the shows. Okay.
(28:38):
I actually wish we just had Tests on as a guest,
because she said another amazing thing about this where I
was like, what is ugly about Joe Alwan? Like he
is like technically attractive and like everything is like all
the ingredients are there, but like it's like it's just
not working. And Test said, I think he has the
same problem as a Oneona writer. They have young face.
(28:59):
And I was like wait and I go, wait, what
do you mean? And and she's like, when they're when
they were young at a certain age, their face was
perfect and perfectly attractive, but as they get older, their
face stays the stay stays the same and it just
doesn't fit on an older body. So she should have
earned a PhD for this analysis. Lizer Pewlitzer wait is
(29:24):
Pultz are like for something, don't to worry about it.
I don't need to worry about it. She I was like,
this is the most genius thing. Yes, because remember when
he was in Billy Bob's Halftime Show or whatever, like, wait,
what's the movie, um, Joe Owens like debut movie. Oh,
Billy Long's halftime walk. Yeah, Billy Billy Lynn's Long halftime Walk, Like,
(29:48):
but doesn't matter. Show was close, okay. I literally thought,
like Billy Bob Thornton had a super Bowl halftime show
and Joe Alwin was in it. I missed this. So
when this, I remember when Billy Lends Long half times
half time, Billy Long was hanging low. Um when that
(30:11):
came out, I remember he was like cute. I was like, oh,
he's cute. That's what his face was young and it
fits Now he gets older, he gets like a weird
beard and his hair is like misshapen and it's like
it doesn't work anymore. And looks humorless. He looks humorless.
He looks like a wet rag. He looks like whatever,
blank And I don't know. It's tough because it's like,
clearly Taylor is hilarious, like all the speaking parts of
(30:36):
Getting Back Together, She's funny. So never getting back together. Yeah,
I don't know about funny. I would say sweet, goofy,
good writer, witty, goofy, goofy, but he's none, all right, whatever,
we don't have to talk about it. But he's none
of those things, so morbidly depressed that he's always going
(30:58):
to have Taylor Swift stands following his and he's like,
you just can't feed into it, and I'm like, well,
then get out of the relationship because you should be
fucking boasting about it. And he can't leave or else
we'll get death threats for the rest of his life.
John marri and Jake Chill and all, I know that
is hard. I know. Last night we were thinking about
(31:21):
watching the movie Ambulance, and I was like, okay, but
Jake like it really did affect their reputation for me, Like,
I still will watch Ambulance, but I'm like, Jake, it's
hard to shake that. Yeah, it's hard to shake it off.
A ten minutes song about what if you think you are?
(31:41):
I loved you just like ten years later, I got
to reprise this resentment. I know, but it's good. She
still hasn't gotten her part, by the way, and she
never will do you have anything else to say about
these these Irish saga's. I'm also like, these are my people,
and I don't have any people that look like this,
(32:03):
Like I don't think Irish people look like these stunning
Like I just I'm like, oh, you just like walked
around Ireland and found like the three most attractive people.
This reminds me of someone named Claire de loon at
Clarabella on Twitter tweeted, we need a Sally Rooney character
with huge tits, and I hear that, like I need
(32:27):
a drunk girl in Ireland who's boisterous, who's boo boo,
the fool at dinners, who has her own depressive issues
and talks openly about them at parties, maybe too much,
maybe a mystery mystery mystery uh, and throws yourself at
the same two guys every weekend and has more than
(32:48):
one friend, and has more than one friend, has multiple
female friends, all of them try to give her advice
which she doesn't take. And that's those are my people.
Those are my Irish ancestors. I know it. Yeah, I
know it too. I wanted to end speaking of Ireland
(33:15):
with Kara Delvine's recent behavior. Oh my god, is she Irish. No,
but okay, but but Megan thee Stallion is. But Megan
the Stallion is one of your long lost Irish cousins.
I uh so. Kara Delavin is British. She comes from
(33:38):
a very like historically British rich family. Her grandfather was
one of the like forefathers of the Black and Tans. Now,
I don't know if you know what these are devins,
Like I missed that in my third year. Didn't didn't
(34:01):
have a third year at Mass. So the Black and
Tans were basically constables and another word I don't know.
They were a British army that were militarized and they
basically tormented the Irish. Okay, Irish for are fighting for independence.
(34:22):
And a friend of mine met Para Delvin's father. She's
Irish though she met Cardel Delvine's father and she's like
very like fun and boisterous at Wimbledon and she what
actually got along with him really well. That night she
has a dream that the Black and Tans are invading
(34:44):
her home and her mother said those were probably your ancestors,
like telling you what happened. Um, I'm just gonna say
this is not the conversation I wanted to have about
is Para Delvin has some historically and annoying roots, but
so recently she was at the Billboard Music Awards was
(35:06):
clearly on a drug called cocaine. H E L L.
Worst performance of all time at a music award show.
Miley has done this too, where people like are obsessed
with making the Stallion, which we all are, but they
everyone's like trying to take attention away from her or
like leech on leeching, like Magan the Stallion was playing
(35:32):
like Hockegirl Summer on stage once and Miley Cyrus went
out uninvited work on stage, and it's like this is
nothing to do with this is not your time, by
the way, and it's also you're not going to be
able to like stand on the sidelines and try to
catch coolness or like whatever you're trying to appropriate for
(35:54):
making the stallion. Karatt Delving is literally trying to lick her. No.
There's a great footage of the on the dance floor
at the met Gala and Cadublin is like trying to
look her and making the sellion literally pauses and pushes
her away like okay, stop, like stop now, get away.
It reminds me of like when Beyonce was bitten at
that party. Remember someone bit her and it was like,
(36:15):
who bit Beyonce? Like it was Karadellovin. I'll tell you
right now, you think so, I think it was Sana Lathan. No,
I know that there's theories, but I'm not trying to
say that. I'm just saying it's the same type of
things we spent the next hour. Yeah, at the Culprits,
my Google search bar is already full with Joe all
Win Billy, so I can't be starting googling something else
(36:35):
Billy Popcorn's aftime show. That's when I realized that Joel
was cute. Yeah, Joe alone just isn't gonna do it
for me. Um, Billy Bob Thorn does it for me
more than Joe all One does any any day, any
over anyone, because I hate myself bad Santo over anyone.
But yeah, Carodelovian is so fucking cringe disgusting. Also, what
(36:57):
are you wearing? Like? What? Everything about it was so
awful and embarrassing. It was like it hurt me to
watch that, Like Bethany Frankel said about Kelly ben Simon
after the Scary Island episode of Rony. She was like,
I fully expected after that trip to find out that
you were in rehab. Like when I saw the pictures
of Kara Delvin where her nostrils look like they're like
(37:19):
the size of hula hoops, I was like, Oh, are
you going to check into rehab tomorrow? Like this is great?
And you know what, it's upsetting because it's like what
you learn in life is like shame doesn't work for everyone,
and I'm grateful that it worked for me. I think
about myself just enough that I was haunted by my
actions and some people aren't. And that's yeah, just keep
(37:40):
really disturbing. Yeah, they can just keep going like never mind.
Um okay, So that's we have to say. We'll get
to the source of Devon's never mind someday. Thank you
so much for tuning in. Let us know what you
think about Courtney Kardashian's wedding to as I. I'm curious.
(38:02):
I'm curious. I haven't finished normal people. I'll let you
guys know what I think when I get to the end.
I bet you'll cry your titties off. I have considered
bangs multiple times while watching, So let's see if that
pans out. I know I look terrible with banks, but
I do keep thinking, like what if I could have
like a mysterious said I with a bang, the Mari
Salon in Beverly Hills, California. I gave them a percentage
(38:26):
of my rent, but they gave me my favorite haircut
of all time. I'm not I'm not gonna be going
to Beverly Hills for haircut, all right. I love you, Devin,
Love you, Carol Shue, Soon sorro M. Love me, baby,
(39:02):
don't leave me hangin. I want true os
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