December 12, 2024 • 53 mins
Teddi and Erika reflect on their past and how it shaped them to be the women they are today.
How did Erika get the name “Erika Jayne”? What huge opportunity did Teddi turn down before moving to LA?
Plus, Erika opens up about why she left her creative career for Tom.
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:14):
We're starting another episode of Diamonds in the Rough. I
love that. Me and Erica we're having what we rat
just a small rant, a private rant, and then we're like, oh,
should we get started. Our producer goes.
Speaker 2 (00:27):
Oh, we're rolling.
Speaker 1 (00:29):
Thanks, thanks, Jeff Lewis Junior.
Speaker 2 (00:33):
Oh oh, well, all right, so welcome back to our
second episode of Diamonds in the Rough. And I hope
you liked the first one because we've got some more
coming for you.
Speaker 1 (00:40):
We've got some more. People really loved it. They loved hearing.
I guess I don't even know if it's a softer
side to each of us, but hearing a side of
some of the questions that people haven't really gotten into.
And I talked about this on to Cheese and a
Pod with Tam. I said, sometimes what's really annoying when
you're watching a housewife shows. Somebody will share information and
(01:03):
then nobody asks the question back because they're so worried
about what they're going to promote. Yes, so you don't
get to the bottom of a lot of things that
I actually think are interesting because the other person's being
so selfish that they're like, hold on, to get hold.
Speaker 2 (01:17):
On, let me say what I need to say. Hold on,
let me say what I need to say.
Speaker 1 (01:22):
What's what's new? What is new?
Speaker 2 (01:25):
Oh? Downstairs, you know I have an electric car. I
have an electric Porsche, by the way, and I just
like saying that. But all the ev spots were taken
up by Tesla's and I was a little because I
don't have I should have plugged in my car at home,
and it was on my to do list, But somehow
or another I got caught up in watching other podcasts
(01:45):
on YouTube, nothing like ours, but something different, and I
just was watching it all night long and I forgot
to plug in my car, and then downstairs they didn't
have any spots for me. It's okay, I'm rude. I'll
make it home.
Speaker 1 (01:59):
I listening to this book. This is just off topic,
but it's the it's what's it called Dinner with Vampires? Oh?
Speaker 2 (02:07):
What's that?
Speaker 1 (02:08):
Oh my god? It's about is it? No, it's a
true it's a memoir.
Speaker 2 (02:12):
It's your family, hold on life, Dinner Vampires.
Speaker 1 (02:16):
Starring But it's at Bethany joy Lyn's from One Yeah,
Dinner for Vampires. It's been on the New York Times
bestseller list multiple times. But I started listening to it
because it was about being in a religious cult and
uh Jesus, she married like the son of like the
head cult leader and it was the girl from One
(02:38):
Tree Hill and she was an actress. It's really good
and like not being in narcissistic relationships like it was.
It's really good. You should listen.
Speaker 2 (02:47):
I watch a lot of those docs on cult leaders
and it is fascinating the way like normal people, I
mean seemingly normal people get really involved in these cults
like that TikTok dance cult.
Speaker 1 (02:59):
Oh oh, that one was a good one.
Speaker 2 (03:01):
Did you see the Mother God one where she where.
Speaker 1 (03:03):
She was drinking like ten, she turned.
Speaker 2 (03:06):
Green, she turned silk up blue codial silver yeah, yeah
whatever whatever silver colid. Yes, and then they drove around
with her body in the in the with the Christmas
lights and ship. I mean, it's possible because you are
in a psychotic state. But also I think what you're
channeling some god and I don't know if it's our
(03:28):
God or there got whatever.
Speaker 1 (03:29):
But that so many people are impressionable or feel so alone.
Yes that they.
Speaker 2 (03:34):
Are, and they're in a vulnerable place. Yeah, they're in
a vulnerable place, or they don't have a sense of
belonging anythink.
Speaker 1 (03:40):
And what what Joylynn said was she you know, has
been an actor since she was a little kid, and
you know, she grew up in the church and she
had had kind of this harder, harder life going up
because she was an introvert, and then she would do
all for acting and then the church wouldn't really accept her.
And she started this. Originally it was just kind of
(04:01):
like a Bible study, okay, and then it turned it
into something out yeah, and it just it made me
think about like what we're talking about through this through
on Diamonds in the Rough. It's like sometimes when you
are on television, sometimes when you have to put on
this persona.
Speaker 2 (04:20):
And it is that it's a persona, it's a performance.
It's an outward facing public persona. Yeah.
Speaker 1 (04:25):
That then sometimes you're so desperate to connect or to
feel sure.
Speaker 2 (04:31):
And people it's it's a strange place because I think
sometimes people assume and being on reality TV is such
a different thing. Like I don't get to take this
character named Erica off, like she lives with me, I
am she I just like you don't get to take
Teddy off and put her in the corner and oh
that was a role I'm playing and I'm actually this
(04:52):
other person. No, And when people meet you out and
they fully they fully accept what they seen on television,
and you can't be anything other than that. And that's
sometimes hard to live with.
Speaker 1 (05:05):
And you can't even really if you show, if you
show emotion, you've shared too much, or you're you're trying
to get attention, or you're trying to get back on
a show, or you're looking for cloud or it's you're thirsty.
But if you don't share enough, you're boring. You're boring
or you know what, you're a hypocrite because you're not sharing.
(05:26):
It's it's such are you're hiding? I mean, all of it.
We've gotten every single criticism you can, you could you
could possibly get. But a lot of this episode we're
going to talk about, like when we first came out here,
We're gonna talk a little bit about nepotism. But first,
let's talk a little bit about just headlines that we've seen.
Speaker 2 (05:48):
Okay, let's do it.
Speaker 1 (05:50):
You want to take the first one.
Speaker 2 (05:51):
Sure. Beyonce Blue Ivy coordinate in their golden gowns as
they bring a strong bond to Mufasa. On Monday, December ninth,
Blue Ivy in her mother Beyonce walk the Red carpet
premiere form of Fasa The Lion King, and in a
video that's circulating on TikTok that starts with the Blue
Ivy taking photos alone, Beyonce comes in to also be
in one of the pictures, and to some viewers that
(06:12):
looked like Blue was annoyed for her mom like kind
of interfering with her moment. People online felt like Blue
should be thankful that she has the nepotism available to
walk on that red carpet. What do you think?
Speaker 1 (06:26):
Well, I think there's also another piece to this puzzle.
She's a teenager. She's one a teenager.
Speaker 2 (06:32):
Yeah, she's a teenager, and she's also a human being
outside of being Beyonce and jay Z's Yeah, like I think.
Speaker 1 (06:38):
About my kids and it doesn't matter if I'm in
a red carpet or not.
Speaker 2 (06:41):
But like, no, I was gonna think about it. I
wanted you to talk about how you grew up with
your father, Like you grew up with a very famous father.
Speaker 1 (06:48):
Yeah, but I also wasn't doing like red car We
lived in Indiana and Hiltonhead there was. It wasn't like
I was walking a bunch of red carpet.
Speaker 2 (06:55):
But it didn't matter.
Speaker 1 (06:56):
He was still just your dad. Yeah, but I think
that And there's also more levels, like people are like, oh,
she seemed annoyed, but in the same moment, what about
Beyonce probably wanted to protect Blue Ivy in that moment
because of everything in the press going on with jay Z. Well, like,
there's so many levels to everything.
Speaker 2 (07:16):
Beyonce is a mom trying to and their daughter. There
could you imagine living in the shadow of someone like Beyonce,
jay Z, Lebron James. I mean, you can look at
it in politics. It's just living in the shadow of
these very famous icons as parents. That's got to be
(07:36):
a mind trip on it own. Like these kids don't
get enough in my opinion, understanding, how are you ever
going to fill a great man and woman's shoes like that?
That's an impossible task. So of course, yes, she's lucky
to have the life that she lives, but guys, it
does not come free. She's paying a price, whether it's
(07:57):
you know, emotionally, physically, psychologically. You know, nothing in life
is easy, even if your parents are jay Z and
Beyonce got this job to break, and.
Speaker 1 (08:06):
I mean it also comes with I mean I didn't
have this, but like imagine being followed around with security
twenty four to seven, having.
Speaker 2 (08:14):
This zero freedom, zero freedom and zero room to mess
up zero And.
Speaker 1 (08:19):
When you do mess up, everybody is going to highlight it,
especially now that there's social media. There's everything. Like I mean,
we had a couple of polaroids when I was younger
of like my bad behavior, Like what man, we didn't
even have polaroids and.
Speaker 2 (08:32):
Go drop off the film and there is none.
Speaker 1 (08:35):
So ah, but I don't even I think she was
just being a teenager and it didn't bother me.
Speaker 2 (08:42):
It didn't bother me at all.
Speaker 1 (08:43):
And also she wanted to go to the premiere. Like
if she didn't want to go, I'm sure she could
have said, I don't want to go.
Speaker 2 (08:49):
She looks great, isn't she in the movie?
Speaker 1 (08:52):
In the movie, but like she's going to go, I mean, right,
But if she didn't want to be in a picture
with her mom, really.
Speaker 2 (08:59):
I'm sure leave Blue Ivy alone.
Speaker 1 (09:03):
She also was happy to be on stage with her
mom at Coachella.
Speaker 2 (09:09):
Also received criticism and came back stronger. Yeah and so
you know, like, let these children live, let these children grow,
let these and stop being So of course she's annoyed.
She's a teenager and I.
Speaker 1 (09:22):
Think that also, And we'll get into it because now
we react to Gwyneth Paltrow's daughter Apple. So Apple jumps
into a debutant's photo, that's Gwyneth Paltrow's daughter. After there
was mean girl backlash. This was on page six. Apple
Martin was labeled a mean girl over the weekend for
(09:44):
playfully jumping into a fellow debutant's photo. Can you pronounce
this detante?
Speaker 2 (09:51):
I don't know, And then the next word, I don't know,
but I know it said, listen, it's very fancy French
and this is a very you know, to be a
debutante is something, I mean, that's lovely and to be
in France and to make your debut. Yeah.
Speaker 1 (10:10):
Well, the French debutant from the viral video told People
Thursday that Apple twenty doesn't deserve an ounce of what
she's getting online. Why not, Well, they're all saying she's
a mean girl because she jumped into the photo.
Speaker 2 (10:24):
But Apple's been photographed since she was an embryo. Yeah, Like,
like again, is she not allowed to have fun?
Speaker 1 (10:33):
Are you just?
Speaker 2 (10:33):
Are you just sour grapes? Because Apples jumped in your photo?
Speaker 1 (10:37):
But she's not even sour grape. She's saying she doesn't
deserve she doesn't deserve it. Even the person whose photos
she jumped into.
Speaker 2 (10:44):
Wait, is sticking up for her. Oh, I'm misreading what
a ding dong?
Speaker 1 (10:48):
Sorry?
Speaker 2 (10:49):
Yes, thank you for the French debutante who agrees with us.
Speaker 1 (10:52):
Yeah, I mean in the video in question, I hate that.
Speaker 2 (10:57):
I look at me. I was always going to the negative.
Speaker 1 (10:59):
Yeah, she's like, anyways, fuck that French debutat.
Speaker 2 (11:02):
I just give that all back. I'm so very sorry.
Thank you to the lovely French debutante who stuck up
for Apple.
Speaker 1 (11:07):
Martin who we can't pronounce her name, but we're trying.
Loppin de Montemart was posing at her black gown when
she turned around and saw Apple walking into frame after
and striking pose after post at the time, she brushed
off the interruption and continued walking.
Speaker 2 (11:22):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (11:23):
Then. Apple also made headlines after the annual event for
an interaction with her date, Count Leohinkle Vaughan Donner. Smart.
Speaker 2 (11:33):
She sounds so euro and so fab it sounds so rich.
It really does. It sounds like something like we don't
have here in America.
Speaker 1 (11:41):
It sounds richer than Teddy Joe.
Speaker 2 (11:43):
Mellencamp or yeah, I don't even I'm not even saying
my name because there's a whole lot of shit that
comes to mind. So we got it.
Speaker 1 (11:50):
She was filmed visibly rolling her eyes during a conversation
with the New York University students. She was filmed being
a human being. Oh okay, yeah, yeah, and I'm sorry
Apple's been getting shit since they named her Apple.
Speaker 2 (12:04):
I agree, I agree. And she's going this daughter and
you know Chris's dad's yeah, like that's her dad. I mean, guys,
leave Apple alone again? Can these people just live?
Speaker 1 (12:16):
No? They can't. Here we go, Yeah, here's another one.
Speaker 2 (12:21):
Okay, well you know what. Okay, So Kim's getting a
blamed for you know, North and Chicago West being and
their father Kanye West music video. Well, if you can't
put your kids in your own music video, like, who cares,
it's his music video. Let them do what they want.
It's their money, their time, their children. If you don't
like it, well then I don't know what to say.
Speaker 1 (12:41):
And while some are giving the exes like they're proud
that they're giving their girls creative freedom. Other labeled the
opportunity as peak nepotism.
Speaker 2 (12:53):
Yeah, they have. I'm here, let me lay out the
facts for you. Nepotism has been around since like before
or you know, the dawn of man, whether it's a
bakery that you hand down to your sons or whether
you were the daughters of Kim and Kanye. I mean nepotism.
I mean we've had two fathersome presidents in the United
(13:14):
States of America, And yes, that's true. I looked it up.
And you know what else, there's nepotism in every field,
and this happens to be their children. Imagine being their children.
That's a very hard place to be. Yes, it's rich.
Yes you have things that other kids don't have, but
you also have this unrealistic pressure placed upon you that
most children will never understand and most adults will never understand.
Speaker 1 (13:38):
And I can say from personal experience, personal experience and
knowing other kids of famous people, famous people, it either
comes with an extreme level of trying to be perfect,
of perfectionism U or the complete opposite.
Speaker 2 (13:59):
Yeah, I've seen.
Speaker 1 (14:00):
Where it's like you're just like fuck it. I want
to be completely the opposite of anything that.
Speaker 2 (14:06):
Yeah, and some people go so far as to change
their name and never talk to their family again. Yeah,
and it's just it runs a gamut. I mean, there's
no fameous not.
Speaker 1 (14:14):
But I don't get hating on the kids for it,
like you can't.
Speaker 2 (14:18):
They're just kids.
Speaker 1 (14:19):
They're just kids.
Speaker 2 (14:20):
And you know, I.
Speaker 1 (14:23):
Don't know, do you think it's do.
Speaker 2 (14:26):
You think it's unfair or do you think when is
the world fair? Right? When has that been? Uh? There
is no fair in this life or this world that
that doesn't even enter the equation.
Speaker 1 (14:36):
Well, I mean, and you can even go, like even
in the South, like whether it's nepotism or not. But
I remember meeting you know, blah blah blah the fourth
Oh yeah, absolutely, you know he had money. Well, of course,
why would we name them. It was a family, it
was a family line. Nobody nobody said for the third
of the fourth if you're broke. Yeah, it's like we're
(14:57):
changing up, changing up the entire situation in here. People
are asking me, do I feel that nepotism has helped
me and are hurt me in my career? I mean,
I would say that the lessons that my dad instilled
in me and working very hard. I was going to
say that has helped me, Like there's been having your dad.
(15:19):
He's been very very hard on me. But he also
you know today, he's the first person that called me
this morning and he's like, you know, just checking in
on you. How is it going? And so I think
it can be challenging, Like but I think, yes, having
somebody with a famous last name as a relative can
(15:39):
get you in the door, but.
Speaker 2 (15:40):
You have to carry the ball from there.
Speaker 1 (15:42):
You have to carry the ball from there. And then
also it can hurt you, like in the same way.
Like people's favorite thing, other than that I'm boring, their
second favorite thing to say about me is that I'm
John Mellencamp's.
Speaker 2 (15:55):
Daughter, So therefore this is all because of him.
Speaker 1 (15:59):
Yeah, and I don't deserve to be a human being,
and you know, yes, I'm riding on his coattails and
so there is challenges and that can't feel good at all.
I mean, I think it's weird because it goes back
to that original conversation is if I if I say
something like, well, I mean I moved out to California
(16:19):
at seventeen and I've been supporting myself and I don't
have a trust fund, and you know, I've had a
million rejections. People are like, oh, what do you want
a pity party?
Speaker 2 (16:29):
No, it's just actually a fact. Yeah, Like it's actually
to show you that all of this advantage you thought
I got really wasn't there. Yeah, And I mean, I
mean some I'm sure something's but certainly, Yeah, you've worked
very hard. Your dad has not and John don't come
for me, but you know, I mean.
Speaker 1 (16:46):
He has not. No, and I mean there's he's laid
it on you very real. Yeah, And I would imagine
that a lot of other parents have done the same.
Speaker 2 (16:56):
I know some very successful men that did not hand
their children their fortune or their business simply because anti quote,
they don't have the talent. But I think also, I
mean I've seen that, and I've seen it in business.
I see it in like, you know, hardcore business, like
they don't have the talent. I'm not doing that.
Speaker 1 (17:18):
But also, what what bens the like would you be
able to like, would people be able to say that
your son is nepotent.
Speaker 2 (17:26):
Like, well, my son's a cops and there's that in
the streets. I don't know if that's anything to be.
Speaker 1 (17:33):
But you see what I'm saying, like, how does that
not exist everywhere then exactly? And like how do you
shelter your kids from being considered You can't?
Speaker 2 (17:44):
I mean, and it's just people are going to you
have to.
Speaker 1 (17:46):
I think that.
Speaker 2 (17:47):
Look, at some point, when you're in the public, you're
going to have to accept the fact that you have
to pay a tax for this, this public life, and
part of it is being misunderstood, uh rushed to judgment
and things like oh, you only got here because of
your father's last name or your mother is Kim Kardashian,
therefore you have our no value and you know, which
(18:07):
is not true, and that's not fair. But when is
life fair?
Speaker 1 (18:12):
Life isn't fair, which brings us to fame our next
thing that or infamy. Can you give me the definition
of Yeah, it's being known for not good shit is.
Speaker 2 (18:24):
One of my lawyers looked at me and said, hey,
you're not famous, you're infamous. So I was like, give
an al capone infamous, you're infamous.
Speaker 1 (18:33):
I was like, great, that's that's yeah. What were your dreams.
Speaker 2 (18:38):
As Okay, So my dream was always to perform, meaning
that from the time I was about three or four,
I would create shows, even though they were nothing. I
would get into a closet, ask my mother to introduce me,
and I would literally jump up on like the coffee table,
like in front of us, and sing and dance for
my mother, my grandmother, anybody that was listening and watching.
(19:00):
And from that, my mom put me in dance and
children's theater and it never stopped. I went to a
great performing arts high school in Atlanta, which is no
longer there. At the time it was called Northside School
of Performing Arts. And then I wanted to continue my
life of performing and moved to New York City and
settled in Los Angeles about eight years later. Seven years later.
(19:22):
So for me, performance has all and I managed to
take long breaks in between. I was married twice and
when I and became a mom, so I wasn't performing then,
but that was always gnawing at my heart, like to perform,
to create, and when I was living Tom's life, and
I really was living Tom's life up for about seven
years and then I said, you know what, Tom, I
(19:43):
need to create. I need to do things like it
was calling It's always been inside. So fame for me
was not the I'm going to be rich and famous. Yes,
that is something that sort of affirms your I don't know,
your pro jax or whatever it is that you do. Hey,
people like it, you know, applause. But I didn't do
(20:04):
it for the applause. I did it because I fucking
loved it, and I love the feeling of being out.
Speaker 1 (20:09):
There on stage. Yea.
Speaker 2 (20:11):
And even now it's like it's it's great and I'm
grateful for everything that's happened to me. But there's also
days where it's like, jeez.
Speaker 1 (20:20):
This is a lot.
Speaker 2 (20:21):
This is a lot. Well, I mean, and I don't
even have I have a sliver, a sliver of the
attention of these people that we were talking about early,
A sliver, you know.
Speaker 1 (20:31):
Well, I mean two years you may have had.
Speaker 2 (20:34):
For two years, I was a roll two years you may,
but for two years ago I was. Yeah, it was
and not for all the right reasons. So it would
be different if it was like, oh, Erica, you were
celebrated because it was so great.
Speaker 1 (20:50):
We were in the Lion King.
Speaker 2 (20:52):
Yeah, you're in the Lion King and you you really
killed it, are you?
Speaker 3 (20:56):
Yeah?
Speaker 2 (20:56):
You know that's not what I was sure, It's just
the Yeah, let me know, it was none of that.
It was let's make let's let's be on a reality
TV show. Let's have competitors, competing networks make docs about you.
Let's have every fucking tabloid write about you, put you
on everything. And like I said.
Speaker 1 (21:14):
They asked me to be in that doc. By the way, I.
Speaker 2 (21:17):
Was thank you. I really appreciate that. Thank you. You know,
there was a couple of people that have that reached
out to me and were like, hey, this came across
my desk just so you know, no way, Yeah, And
I appreciate everybody that did that because that's it's like,
that's gross.
Speaker 1 (21:30):
I mean, granted, I know that on to teasing the
pot I recaptured, but like, there's a there's a there's
a good there's a limit. But what do you say
to people because this was this is the perception that
you get and I'm I'm talking to not as somebody
that's one of my good friends, but it's the perception
of sure, watching on the show, you know, you were married,
(21:51):
you got a divorce, you you went to go trace
chase your dream, leave the other stuff behind, and then
you met an older man who funded the entire who
funded the entire vanity project?
Speaker 2 (22:01):
Yes, not true. I've been getting paid in the entertainment
business since i was a little kid, even though it
was a local you know, in Atlanta, Georgia, where I'm
born and raised. Yeah, I was working since I was
little and meaning I wanted to. I wanted to do
these things, whether it was commercials, whether it was theater
and being on Housewives did nothing more than take my project,
(22:24):
which was already on its feet and expose it. Took
it out of the clubs and took it to a
more mainstream environment.
Speaker 1 (22:31):
How long were you performing in the clubs and stuff
before you booked Housewif.
Speaker 2 (22:35):
I started Erica Jane, I want to say, I think
two thousand and seven was my first record, and then
I don't know what year I came on, so whatever,
I don't Yeah.
Speaker 1 (22:44):
But do you think that what was like the when
you first started with Tom. Was there a time where
he was like, I don't want you performing or did
you just mold your life into his?
Speaker 2 (22:58):
I molded my life because what my life was was
his life was great. Yeah, So I molded my life
into his life and I and I got exposure to
an entirely different life, and so that was wonderful until
you know again here says this need. Yeah, until this
(23:18):
need to like, hey, I want to create again. I
feel this again, and I think that that's what happens.
We step away, we come back, We step away, we
come back. Was there a defining moment? Yes, there was.
I received an invitation to a club show of a
woman that I knew through Tom's social circle. But I
(23:41):
flipped it over and I saw that it was choreographed
by one of my dear friends from performing arts high
school that had worked with like heavily with Michael Jackson
and everyone else, and I mean like a real fucking
like a real dancer. And I called him and I said,
what are you doing on this project? And he literally said,
oh yeah, you know. He said, well what are you
doing and I said, well, in terms of like performing
(24:04):
and I said, well nothing, really, I haven't. It's well,
if it's possible for her, meaning the invitation, the woman
on the invitation, is possible for you. So shout out
to Travis Payne, thank you. And he planted the seed
and helped me grow Erica Jane and then Mikey and
I took it and grew it more. So we just
kept going. And that's the truth. And look my hometown.
(24:29):
You know, I know, I'm fifty three, but like the
kids that came up, we came up together and performing
our school, we turned out some amazing talent, some really
cool people. I mean you basically when you came out
of our dance program, you went on tour with Michael
or Janet, Paula Abdul or you went onto Broadway like
there was no and let's not forget you did go
onto Broadway. I did, but much later in my life.
(24:50):
But like I'm talking straight out of twelfth grade. Yeah,
they didn't go. They were like right out of there
on world tours. And that was when you were making money,
like they were buying houses and shit.
Speaker 1 (25:02):
Do you remember, like what your biggest rejection was.
Speaker 2 (25:05):
I've had so many. I remember people telling me, you know,
you're not talented, you can't sing, you can't dance. But
and I was like, no, no, no, no, no, I don't
think you seem to understand. It's all about also how
you see yourself as an artist. There are there are
people that are vocalists, there are people that are dancers.
There are people that entertain like it's all of that.
(25:26):
I don't think you are what you think you are
probably is the biggest rejection.
Speaker 1 (25:31):
What it's your biggest insecurity.
Speaker 2 (25:34):
I think my biggest insecurity sometimes is not feeling prepared.
I don't know how to explain that any other way
than not feeling prepared enough. And it's hard to explain,
but like, have I gone over this enough? Have I?
Speaker 1 (25:53):
And you can see it in your demeanor when you
don't feel.
Speaker 2 (25:56):
Like you're prepared, yes, And when you don't know, I
feel like an edgy to And when I don't know,
I feel like I don't know a piece of music
well enough, or I haven't worked out the kinks in something,
or I don't know the choreography well enough, I feel rushed.
Speaker 1 (26:11):
You can see it.
Speaker 2 (26:12):
And because you don't get into that flow state, Yeah,
you don't get into that relaxed state that people like
when you can throw away all of the all of
the stuff and just really live in the moment. And
that's what I crave the most is living in that
moment on stage is nothing like it?
Speaker 1 (26:26):
Is it an escape? You think?
Speaker 2 (26:28):
I say that all the time.
Speaker 1 (26:30):
And what was there? And I know I'm grilling Erica
right now, but I'll switch over it will But like,
was your would you consider your mom the stage mom?
Speaker 2 (26:40):
Yes, I think that it well, not only my mother,
but my grandmother. In the best sense possible, I think
that I was living their unrealized dreams through two generations.
And there was a moment when I was like, can
I just because it was constant, like it was company
rehearsal on the weekend ends and went to performing arts
(27:01):
high school, you know, can I step back? I'm not really,
but Erica, if you step back, you lose time. And
so they instilled a whole lot of sense of urgency
into me.
Speaker 1 (27:14):
And would you say that, like your mom is still
involved in your career?
Speaker 2 (27:18):
Yeah? My mom is like that was terrible, and I'm like,
can you not come? You know, I don't like that.
I really thought I was like pause pause, personally, are
you fuck?
Speaker 1 (27:30):
Yeah? I was gonna I was about I thought you
were gonna say fuck now.
Speaker 2 (27:33):
I was like, no, if anyone can strike at my
the deepest, most open wound of myself, it's my mother.
And you can see it on the show. You can
see how I just start to turn on her because
that mouth of hers is ruthless because it cuts me
(27:53):
in a way that nobody can.
Speaker 1 (27:54):
Yeah. Yeah, and.
Speaker 2 (27:57):
Is not nice at all, very ugly, very ugly. And
I've shown that and I've tried really hard to work
on it. I really have. I discussed it in therapy,
I've talked about it with my mother. It's just something
I have to get over. Yeah, you know, something that
I have to get over. I also say that follow
your dreams.
Speaker 1 (28:28):
How did you pick the name Erica Jane?
Speaker 2 (28:31):
Shit, I couldn't come up with anything else. I mean,
it's really not that deep. I just wanted to be Erica,
you know, because I thought that disconnecting from I didn't
want to be Erica da. You know, you don't want
to be a real name, Like that's not exciting. The thing,
the whole thing about being an artist or having an
artistic project is escapism. I've always said Erica Jane was
an escape artist. It was an escape from all life
(28:52):
that I was living at that time. Fantasy, love, escape, glitz,
glamor of fine illw my six words to describe Erica Jane.
But it was the only thing that we came up
with at the time. I don't have some magical sort
of Is it inspired by Jane Mansfield? Sure?
Speaker 1 (29:11):
I mean, but it's funny that you say that. As
you said that, you know you wanted that name getting
into nepotism in my dad he wanted to get away
from his stage name.
Speaker 2 (29:25):
Really.
Speaker 1 (29:26):
Yeah, they you know, back when he first started coming up,
they gave him Johnny Couger, That's right, and then he
spent years and years and years of his life trying
to be John Mellencamp, fighting it. So then it went
from Johnny Couger to John Couger to John Cougar Mellencamp.
Speaker 2 (29:41):
You know, like how old was your father when he
was signed? Like his first his.
Speaker 1 (29:45):
First big hit was in nineteen eighty one, the year
I was born. So, I mean those could see it.
Speaker 3 (29:50):
Jack and Diane, I think it was Jack and Diane
and it was that album I remember was thirty six
and I can see the album cover in my head
and I can remember that that song was.
Speaker 2 (30:01):
I mean you talk about heavy rotation like that song
was a funny.
Speaker 1 (30:05):
It's a smash. Yeah. And that's my mom in the video.
Speaker 2 (30:07):
Oh my gosh, I'm going on tonight? Is it really?
Speaker 1 (30:10):
Yeah?
Speaker 2 (30:10):
That's OK.
Speaker 1 (30:13):
That's my mom sucking on chili dogs outside.
Speaker 2 (30:15):
The tastey freeze and to think. But I and when
I met you, I was like, wow, I've listened to
her dad like for forever.
Speaker 1 (30:25):
But it is funny, I mean, the way people you know,
there's an escapism version, and then there's also the part
of like when you when you want, when you want
to achieve your goals, you may sign on and do
anything right even if it's not something you want to. Well.
Speaker 2 (30:44):
I think that that's also how that business was and
is still is that they change and mold you to
what is palatable and what sells. I mean, and now
now it's the complete opposite. If you're not your authentic self,
you're not selling shit.
Speaker 1 (30:57):
So I mean they did the same thing with like
you know, old Hollywood movies.
Speaker 2 (31:01):
Nobody was her real name, Marilyn Monroe was not her name.
Norma Jean Martinsen was you know, Marilyn Monroe, Rita Cansino
was Rita Hayworth.
Speaker 1 (31:08):
Yeah, And they would be signed onto one particular you
know studio, and I had to do all the movies
within that, and then they get loaned out.
Speaker 2 (31:16):
Yeah, and they would get loaned out. So I mean
it's kind of like being on Brava. I'm just chidding,
my god, nobody wants to borrow.
Speaker 1 (31:25):
You right now.
Speaker 2 (31:26):
Don't you ever say that again in my presence. I'm
telling you better stop talking negatively.
Speaker 1 (31:31):
I have if I didn't laugh at myself.
Speaker 2 (31:33):
No, but there's there's a limit. Okay, fine, okay, you
can have that's it. That's your one stop deprecating. Do
not say that again.
Speaker 1 (31:41):
I do appreciate that, at least, you know when I'm
being self deprecating now versus when we first met and
you were just.
Speaker 2 (31:46):
Like, gosh, well that's also Look, how do you know
what I How do you feel right now now that
you're so you know, all of this really glaring attention
is turned onto you. How do you feel I mean,
and I mean this genuinely, like I'm not trying to
bullshit you, Like, how do you feel about what were
(32:08):
your hopes and dreams as a performer and now you've
never been bigger? Being known for something that's painful? Yeah,
and that sucks.
Speaker 1 (32:16):
It sucks. I would say that like when I first
came out to California, you know, I had grown up
riding horses, and I got all of my I don't
know my confidence by winning getting those blue ribbons. Well,
you were a professional as a teenager. People don't realize this, Ted,
he was a professionalist team. Yeah, like I was, you
know one at Madison Square Garden. It was it was
(32:39):
my entire life. And then I had gotten a full
ride to college. But in contingent with riding on the team.
When I said it was by the way, I don't
want to say, okay, but to ride on the team.
But then when I said that, I wouldn't I didn't
want to ride on the team because I was an
idiot seventeen year old and said I don't want to
ride on the college team because collegiate riding as a step.
(33:01):
But it just was a stupid It's a fucking man,
It's okay. But then they were like, well then we
don't want you. You have shitty grades.
Speaker 2 (33:08):
The mean we got you over here is because you
were good.
Speaker 1 (33:11):
And that's when I decided to move to California and
I my parents were like, well, yeah, I mean you can.
And they were divorced at this time, a million years
and you know we did.
Speaker 2 (33:20):
They say to you, how dare you turn down a
full ride? I can't imagine your dad being like, hey,
what's wrong with you? Yeah?
Speaker 1 (33:25):
And I mean and then he was like, well that's fine.
If you're gonna if you don't want to ride in college,
well I you will still take you. And I was like, well,
I'm not going. I'm going to California. I want to
be an actress.
Speaker 2 (33:36):
Is that what you wanted to be?
Speaker 1 (33:37):
Yeah, I mean I didn't, but I didn't really I
just wanted to be seen, Okay, I get it. It
wasn't like I was in acting school for all these years.
I mean, I probably you know, I mess. I met
my I started at CA in the mailroom. I met
my first roommate and my first acting class i'd ever taken.
Speaker 2 (33:54):
Did your dad get you the job at CIA? In
the mail room?
Speaker 1 (33:56):
He got me that interview, baby, He got me that
interview with Arlene Newman. May she rest in peace.
Speaker 2 (34:02):
Well, it's not like you were doing anything interesting other
than delivering the mail, which is, as everybody knows, the
key starting position.
Speaker 1 (34:09):
It is the key. I was the only person in
the mail room that hadn't graduated from an Ivy League college.
So it was a touch of nepotism that got good
for you. But then I got myself on a partner's desk.
Hell yeah. So after a year of being in the
mayroom all of those things, I worked my way up
and kind of became that quirky, self deprecating taty joe
(34:31):
that everybody kind of wanted. Sure, they were like on
their desk, Yeah, we want you, we want you to
work for me. And it taught me a lot. And
it also taught me that I came from being a
big fish in a small pond to the smallest fish
and the biggest ocean, and the ocean.
Speaker 2 (34:51):
And the fucking the ocean intimating out here, yeah, well anywhere,
but you know, it can get intimidating.
Speaker 1 (34:56):
And I, you know, had We've talked about this, but
I had grown up with eating issues and body dysmorphia
and all that kind of stuff that comes with riding
horses and skin tight beige pants and well did you
have to weigh in for those things? You don't have
to weigh in and hunter jumper, But it's like you're
almost rewarded for.
Speaker 2 (35:16):
Being tiny and small and looking like you don't exist
on the horse, and especially.
Speaker 1 (35:20):
When you're somebody that's my height and I don't have
long legs.
Speaker 2 (35:22):
Yeah, you have to be teeny tiny.
Speaker 1 (35:24):
Yeah, like, so it was kind of that. And then
I came out to California and I'd gone to the
same school from third grade till twelfth grade, so like,
and I rode with the same people, so I never
had to kind of make new friends. Oh shit, And
all of a sudden, I'm out here to tell me,
I'm like, oh, hell, you know, and I'm I'm living
(35:45):
in the studio apartment, barely making do.
Speaker 2 (35:48):
Like, let's just say that your dad gave you no money.
You're not feeling this part of the story. Your father said, fuck.
Speaker 1 (35:54):
You, he gave they My parents gave me my Jetta.
We packed that jetts, got rid of the Grimlin, we
got rid of the Gremlin, I got the Jetta, We
shifted out, and then that was that was the end
of it.
Speaker 2 (36:05):
That was good luck.
Speaker 1 (36:05):
You figured out.
Speaker 2 (36:06):
You figured it out, which is kind of it's great,
but it's also like, could you imagine turning slate loose
right in a few years and being like, go work
it out? No, but not, I mean think about that,
they basically say, and that you go.
Speaker 1 (36:19):
But I mean to be perfectly honest and that I'm
not trying to like shit on my mom. But I
had been kind of figuring it out.
Speaker 2 (36:26):
Yeah yeah, your whole life, My.
Speaker 1 (36:28):
Whole life, you know, so that part was but adding
in that like loneliness of being in a big place.
And then that's when I kind of, I guess, in
lack of a better way of saying, it started eating
my feelings. And I remember that first. You know, at
this point, I come out to LA, I get you know,
(36:49):
things are going all right. I'm making a couple of friends,
I'm doing.
Speaker 2 (36:51):
At the job.
Speaker 1 (36:52):
I got the job, I got a manager. I got
those head shots with like the belly button piercing that
I had just gotten, you know, like my pencil thin eyebrows.
And then that's when.
Speaker 2 (37:04):
Did you go to class? Did you study?
Speaker 1 (37:05):
I did I see study?
Speaker 2 (37:07):
Yes? Uh?
Speaker 1 (37:09):
Not Stey what what? Yes?
Speaker 2 (37:11):
What?
Speaker 1 (37:12):
What helped me?
Speaker 2 (37:12):
I was going to say Stella Adler because it sounded
like you were going to say that, but that doesn't
sound right.
Speaker 1 (37:15):
It's not. It was Stella Adler later, but before that
it was I don't know because I didn't go I'm
not I'm going to hear but either or I mean,
it was like a chorus line pretend to be a tree.
Speaker 2 (37:28):
You know how I love that? How what the fuck
is the tree? Like, I've never even thought about that.
Speaker 1 (37:33):
Explain how you'd feel if you were the Hollywood sign.
Speaker 2 (37:37):
Old and dilapidated with.
Speaker 1 (37:39):
The l missing, because somebody, that's what I was saying,
anybody I jumped off. But yeah, and then there was
a moment where I was going on auditions and I
was also I was a hostess at Mister Chow and
your O Chow, and things were just kind of spiraling.
I booked the job. I talked about this on the show,
and then after pilot season, we kind of started like
(38:02):
we had that second round. We're like, we're all about
to start filming the pilot and I had gained probably
fifty pounds.
Speaker 2 (38:09):
Oh no, yeah, I remember.
Speaker 1 (38:10):
Yes, they called their manager and said she either needs
to lose weight or we're going to fire her. We're
going to fire And I never recovered from that. I
never recovered from it. And I also never went on
another audition again.
Speaker 2 (38:24):
Yeah, it took it out of you.
Speaker 1 (38:25):
Yeah, Like I was like that, and then I was
so bitter of course about.
Speaker 2 (38:31):
It and demoralized. I mean, Jesus Christ, could you imagine
lose fifty pounds that we're going to.
Speaker 1 (38:34):
Fucking fire you. Yeah, like we're done.
Speaker 2 (38:37):
The girl that we hired is not the girl that's
showing up here. Yeah.
Speaker 1 (38:41):
And then it just became, you know, fifteen years of
living in California and you know, just putzing around trying
to figure out what I was going to do. You know,
like I worked in agencies, I went and the fact that.
Speaker 2 (38:56):
You never went on an audition again is so crushing.
That just lets me know how deeply that wounded you.
Speaker 1 (39:02):
Yeah, And I mean I remember going home for that
Thanksgiving like that that year after, and I just had
kept gaining more and more weight, and I just remember,
this is not judgment of my family, but I remember
walking in in my family's faces because there was an
Instagram then, so.
Speaker 2 (39:21):
They were like shocked when you walked through the door.
Speaker 1 (39:24):
Yeah, they were shocked.
Speaker 2 (39:25):
And it was not in a good way.
Speaker 1 (39:26):
Not not in a good way. And so that's kind
of always carried with me. But then, you know, you
take that pain and to transmute it, and you transmute
it and I kind of started finding my way and
then you know, I lost it again. And that's and
that's really the long, the long and short of it
is my life has been this and and so is.
Speaker 2 (39:47):
Yours, of course, And I think that that's, you know,
I hate to be so cliche, but that's also like
I'm gonna and you guys can criticize us later. That's
the hero's journey, I mean, because you have it, you
lose it, you regain it. You you know, you're mad,
you're sad, you're bitter, but you overcome and then things change.
The most important thing I think for me, and I
think for you, is to like I told you, you can
(40:10):
do anything but quit, and you will again take this
challenge and overcome and make it something else. And I
think the way that you've you were on housewives and
then you took that and turned yourself into a really
great podcaster and you've had a lot of success is
not only it's very admirable, but so many people would
(40:30):
have walked off in defeat and you didn't do that.
And you have to you have to acknowledge that in
yourself that you've created something else out of that, and
you'll create something else out of this experience.
Speaker 1 (40:42):
And I have to also like tell you, thank you.
I'm gonna get it a much right now. I have
to tell you thank you because it it didn't mean
a lot to me that you said yes to me,
of course, and it did mean a lot to me
because there are so many people that want to jump
on the bed wagon, yeah, of hating or making you
(41:03):
feel like you're less than or not enough. And I
think that the fact that you chose our connection over
what other people thought is why this became so successful.
And I really really appreciated it, and like you did
it at a time that like you really didn't have to.
Speaker 2 (41:18):
Yeah, But I am your friend, Yeah, And I also
have been where you are, and I also know that
this too shall pass, And I believe in you, and
I respect you, and I know that you will overcome
because you are a hard fucking worker and you've never
allowed anything since I've known you to take you to
(41:38):
a place where you didn't fight back and fight back
on your own behalf. And so I'm very proud of
thank you.
Speaker 1 (41:44):
And I mean, we may fight back the wrong way.
Speaker 2 (41:46):
But nobody's perfect, and you are a human being, and
you're allowed to have these sort of experiences. The difference
between us and others is that ours is in the
public and people get to enjoy cheer us on or
criticize us. It's all good at the end of the day. Yeah,
now I have.
Speaker 1 (42:02):
A tear, I know. Okay, So our next question that
people are asking.
Speaker 2 (42:26):
I think, like, why did you both want to become
a housewife? Did you ever watch reality TV before? I
did not?
Speaker 1 (42:32):
You know, I did not watch this show before I
got I didn't either, But people never believe me when
I say that.
Speaker 2 (42:36):
They didn't for me either. I said I knew who
the women were because at that time.
Speaker 1 (42:41):
Oh yeah, people always going to say, we saw that
picture of you and Kyle when you're in like the.
Speaker 2 (42:45):
Air, Yeah we met its two completely different noses and
knows ago Yeah, no to both of us, by the way.
And she doesn't care that I say this, but a
nos ago and yeah, I had met her at some
party and she was kind of she was the thing
about Kyle people don't understand. And I said this a
(43:07):
long time ago. Kyle had grew up in this business.
But she doesn't take it that seriously. Do you know
what I'm saying? Like, Oh, I you know, she's always
been friendly to strangers and to everyone else. And she
and so she was I was a stranger. She took
a picture with me. There you go. That's all it is.
Speaker 1 (43:22):
Yeah. People try to make it like, oh, she's been
dying to get on the show for years because this
one photo.
Speaker 2 (43:28):
No, No, it's kind of bizarre. I would have never
seen myself on a show like this.
Speaker 1 (43:32):
So how did you actually?
Speaker 2 (43:34):
I told you I, Tom and I were friends with
David Foster and Yolanda. We had gone out to their
house one day and she came down not feeling great
in her robe. She was very sick, and we were
all talking, the four of us, and she literally said,
have you thought about being a housewife? And I said no,
And she said, I'm texting my boss. We've already kind
of started, but we need someone, and that was Alex Baskin. Yeah,
(44:00):
and here I am. I got the job, and here
I am. It was really something that was so different
than anything I could have ever seen. I didn't know
what I was doing or what it was because it
wasn't like a five six, seven eight, yeah go over here.
Seeing this note, I was like, what are we doing? So, yeah,
what about you?
Speaker 1 (44:21):
For me, it was slightly different. So I had said
I never had gone on Edition again after that incident,
but then cut to you know, we're ten or fifteen
years later. I've had the I've had my first two kids.
I was in and I've been open about this. I
(44:42):
was in like a rough part of my life again. Yeah,
like you know, I'd had multiple miscarriages, I had IVF.
I was struggling because it was what I forgot about
how that it was the first time that I wasn't
making my own money.
Speaker 2 (44:54):
Oh wow, which is a big deal for you and
you know who else is a big deal for you?
And Kyle really bonded over that. Yeah, like both of
you like making my own money because I was always like, yeah, whatever,
let me give it to whomever. The two of you
are very in sync about that.
Speaker 1 (45:10):
Yeah. I mean I always had my own separate bank
account and for the first time ever, I didn't have
anything in there, that anything, and it was just making
me honestly unhinged. And that's when I started All In,
not as a company, just I started. It was La
Workout Junkie. You guys actually made me change the name whatever,
(45:31):
but La Workout Junkie, which was like, I want to
change my life today. And they followed along on my
journey on changing my life and then it turned into
a business and all of that. So I'd grown a
very small Instagram falling. We're talking like ten thousand people
right throughout my journey and my business. And I had
been reached out to you know, you get those emails
(45:52):
from like casting sure, and I had been reached out
to be on a different show like Bunham and Murray,
like the Ogs, the Ogs of reality TV. And I
filmed the pilot and it was I mean, a lot
of the girls from that show have come on and
they and they did really well, and then the show
(46:13):
continued on. But after I filmed the pilot, I was like,
I absolutely cannot do that show.
Speaker 2 (46:21):
Like I was like this, was it combative or just
conflict or just sit right with you?
Speaker 1 (46:26):
So staged? And like I just I felt like it
didn't feel right. And so I emailed my old friend
from C A A And said, Hey, did I sign
a contract that I can't get out?
Speaker 2 (46:44):
Wow?
Speaker 1 (46:45):
And turned out and she said you can know. She
said you can get out of it, and she goes,
but while we're on the topic, would you do Real Housewives?
And I said, I've never watched it because I watched
The Bachelor of Real Rules like, but I wasn't at
that point. I was pretty I was younger, you know
(47:05):
what I was gonna say.
Speaker 2 (47:06):
I always thought you were too young to be on
the show because you were on your way up. You
need bitches that are on their way down. Now you've
got all the dirt under your nails, you'll ever need
to be on.
Speaker 1 (47:20):
But yeah, so that's how it happened. And then the
entire like process started where you have your interviews, your
test seetings or test shoots, all of that. But I
kind of knew the second I had my test shoot
with like Chris Colin and everybody. I was like, I'm
going to get the drop. Like, I kind of knew it.
But I mean I didn't keep it for that long.
Speaker 2 (47:38):
Well, you kept it long enough. I think that you
kept it long enough to learn a lot of things
and then to you know, recreate yourself, which is.
Speaker 1 (47:46):
I mean, it did make me realize that I wasn't
my full self. Yeah.
Speaker 2 (47:52):
That's the one thing about turning a camera onto yourself
that I think sometimes people who aren't in our business
don't have the luxury of doing, which is to see yourself.
Speaker 1 (48:02):
Yeah and go oh god, yeah.
Speaker 2 (48:05):
Wow, that's really how I speak to others, or that's
how I allow others to speak to me, or I
look crazy.
Speaker 1 (48:14):
No, I was like a shell of a human being.
Yeah you can, and I can assure you. I'm going
through a way fucking harder time now than I was then.
Speaker 2 (48:21):
Yeah, but you got chops now.
Speaker 1 (48:23):
But like it took a little time and it was like, yeah,
I mean this, this is naturally who I am. I
just I deflated in that moment.
Speaker 2 (48:33):
But that's a that's a very common thing to do.
It's like when people say, oh, you're so much different,
like when we have this conversation. Of course I'm different.
I'm having a conversation with a friend. I'm not in
a shark tank right now. Yeah, I'm just open and
able to talk to you about certain things.
Speaker 1 (48:51):
What would you say the biggest pro and con are of.
Speaker 2 (48:55):
Being on the show, of being in reality television. I
think the biggest pro is I've it's you know, kicked
up in a whole bunch of doors. For me, the
biggest con has been, you know, what I went through
publicly with Tom and subsequently everything after that, and having
to live through that and pick yourself up and rebuild,
(49:16):
which has been the hardest. What about you?
Speaker 1 (49:18):
I would say the biggest pro is has one been
that I've been able to kind of create all of
this afterwards. Yeah, and that I've had the support of
all of you other ladies that have come in and
been like, yeah, let's let's go, let's do this, let's
make magic together. So that's been a pro along with
(49:39):
you know, parts of you know, financial things, but also friendships. Yeah,
like I have developed some real true friends, but friends
that when you are down, they're still there. There's still there,
like down down. So that's the pros. And I've been
able to give my you know, my family a different
life than I probably could have if it never happened,
(50:03):
And the cons are I also gave my family a
different life than.
Speaker 2 (50:09):
They could well set you know, you could have lived privately.
Someone said this to me, if you weren't on a
reality TV show, what would it have been like the
fallout with Tom? And I said, well, look, it would
have been a very bad legal story. Yeah, nobde cares.
But because you're on TV, then it becomes something else,
bigger and its own monster. And I'm sure you feel
(50:29):
the same way.
Speaker 1 (50:30):
Yeah, And then you get into this feeling of your like,
do I do I fight back super hard or do
I just sit chilly? Or do I do that?
Speaker 2 (50:38):
Like there are no right or wrong.
Speaker 1 (50:39):
They're no right or wrong. There's no right a wrong,
and I'm sure I'll keep making mistakes, guys, so just
stay tune.
Speaker 2 (50:43):
Yeah, but you know what, again, there's no handbook for
everybody can assume that they know what you're going through.
And yes, there's been a lot of divorces and whatever
separations or whatever I went through just but to do
it in a public forum is a whole other animal.
And there are very few people that you can call
(51:04):
and say I feel like I'm gonna blow my head
off and they go, yes, that's normal. Hold on a second,
let me talk to you, and you're gonna be okay.
Speaker 1 (51:14):
And I think something that I have learned through this
that also has been pretty great with my friends, whether
they're show friends I met through the show or friends
that my you know, mommy and me or whatever it was,
is the ability to have the strength to say, actually
I don't want to talk right now, why and that's
really fucking sad? Or I'm really I'm having a day,
(51:36):
or hey can we go, let's go to line for
let's do that. Like we are allowed to have highs
and lows, And I think for so long I didn't
believe I was allowed to have those.
Speaker 2 (51:46):
Why you just thought you had to be on all
the time, all the time.
Speaker 1 (51:49):
Jesus, I thought.
Speaker 2 (51:51):
That too, until I had nothing but lows and I
gave up. It crushed me so hard, Like the lows
were so hard that I was like, I can't, I
I just can't. Like it's it's really from A to B,
it's really from nine am to eleven am. I would
check in with my therapist like every like her goal
for me was every two to three hours, Like, if
(52:13):
you can just make it till noon, consider that a goal.
Like really she was like, yeah, that's how bad the
shit is. And I feel badly for anybody that's listening
that doesn't have that kind of support, because it is
important as human beings and it's just women that you know,
we go through these things and we really should be there.
(52:35):
I know it's hard and it sounds cliche, but for
one another more so than we really are, and stop
judging everybody. You're fucked up.
Speaker 1 (52:43):
To listen and it's fine. I think it's okay. To like,
if you want to make small talk and gossip about
them and fucking do it.
Speaker 2 (52:49):
I think that's wonderful and that's how we put ourselves
out here. But also too, just remember when you're pointing
in that mirror, they're two at you, right, that's two
fingers pointing right.
Speaker 1 (53:00):
Well, thank you guys for tuning in to another episode
of Diamonds in the Rough. What should we get into
next week?
Speaker 2 (53:07):
I don't know, but I think that we have we
need to get our claws into something good. How about
in the comments? Oh, give us some suggestions if you
if you see something you know that you want to
maybe talk about, give us a little suggestion, Give.
Speaker 1 (53:22):
Us a suggestion, and we could even comment on the comments.
Speaker 2 (53:27):
I like that too.
Speaker 1 (53:28):
I always should clap back to our comments.
Speaker 2 (53:31):
Or just laugh our asses off because sometimes they're just
so good. But that means you'd have to turn off
key where it's.
Speaker 1 (53:37):
Eh the clown emoji? The clown You can't even write
that online? Try it dar, all right?
Speaker 2 (53:45):
Thank you so much for listening,
We're starting another episode of Diamonds in the Rough. I
love that. Me and Erica we're having what we rat
just a small rant, a private rant, and then we're like, oh,
should we get started. Our producer goes.
Speaker 2 (00:27):
Oh, we're rolling.
Speaker 1 (00:29):
Thanks, thanks, Jeff Lewis Junior.
Speaker 2 (00:33):
Oh oh, well, all right, so welcome back to our
second episode of Diamonds in the Rough. And I hope
you liked the first one because we've got some more
coming for you.
Speaker 1 (00:40):
We've got some more. People really loved it. They loved hearing.
I guess I don't even know if it's a softer
side to each of us, but hearing a side of
some of the questions that people haven't really gotten into.
And I talked about this on to Cheese and a
Pod with Tam. I said, sometimes what's really annoying when
you're watching a housewife shows. Somebody will share information and
(01:03):
then nobody asks the question back because they're so worried
about what they're going to promote. Yes, so you don't
get to the bottom of a lot of things that
I actually think are interesting because the other person's being
so selfish that they're like, hold on, to get hold.
Speaker 2 (01:17):
On, let me say what I need to say. Hold on,
let me say what I need to say.
Speaker 1 (01:22):
What's what's new? What is new?
Speaker 2 (01:25):
Oh? Downstairs, you know I have an electric car. I
have an electric Porsche, by the way, and I just
like saying that. But all the ev spots were taken
up by Tesla's and I was a little because I
don't have I should have plugged in my car at home,
and it was on my to do list, But somehow
or another I got caught up in watching other podcasts
(01:45):
on YouTube, nothing like ours, but something different, and I
just was watching it all night long and I forgot
to plug in my car, and then downstairs they didn't
have any spots for me. It's okay, I'm rude. I'll
make it home.
Speaker 1 (01:59):
I listening to this book. This is just off topic,
but it's the it's what's it called Dinner with Vampires? Oh?
Speaker 2 (02:07):
What's that?
Speaker 1 (02:08):
Oh my god? It's about is it? No, it's a
true it's a memoir.
Speaker 2 (02:12):
It's your family, hold on life, Dinner Vampires.
Speaker 1 (02:16):
Starring But it's at Bethany joy Lyn's from One Yeah,
Dinner for Vampires. It's been on the New York Times
bestseller list multiple times. But I started listening to it
because it was about being in a religious cult and
uh Jesus, she married like the son of like the
head cult leader and it was the girl from One
(02:38):
Tree Hill and she was an actress. It's really good
and like not being in narcissistic relationships like it was.
It's really good. You should listen.
Speaker 2 (02:47):
I watch a lot of those docs on cult leaders
and it is fascinating the way like normal people, I
mean seemingly normal people get really involved in these cults
like that TikTok dance cult.
Speaker 1 (02:59):
Oh oh, that one was a good one.
Speaker 2 (03:01):
Did you see the Mother God one where she where.
Speaker 1 (03:03):
She was drinking like ten, she turned.
Speaker 2 (03:06):
Green, she turned silk up blue codial silver yeah, yeah
whatever whatever silver colid. Yes, and then they drove around
with her body in the in the with the Christmas
lights and ship. I mean, it's possible because you are
in a psychotic state. But also I think what you're
channeling some god and I don't know if it's our
(03:28):
God or there got whatever.
Speaker 1 (03:29):
But that so many people are impressionable or feel so alone.
Yes that they.
Speaker 2 (03:34):
Are, and they're in a vulnerable place. Yeah, they're in
a vulnerable place, or they don't have a sense of
belonging anythink.
Speaker 1 (03:40):
And what what Joylynn said was she you know, has
been an actor since she was a little kid, and
you know, she grew up in the church and she
had had kind of this harder, harder life going up
because she was an introvert, and then she would do
all for acting and then the church wouldn't really accept her.
And she started this. Originally it was just kind of
(04:01):
like a Bible study, okay, and then it turned it
into something out yeah, and it just it made me
think about like what we're talking about through this through
on Diamonds in the Rough. It's like sometimes when you
are on television, sometimes when you have to put on
this persona.
Speaker 2 (04:20):
And it is that it's a persona, it's a performance.
It's an outward facing public persona. Yeah.
Speaker 1 (04:25):
That then sometimes you're so desperate to connect or to
feel sure.
Speaker 2 (04:31):
And people it's it's a strange place because I think
sometimes people assume and being on reality TV is such
a different thing. Like I don't get to take this
character named Erica off, like she lives with me, I
am she I just like you don't get to take
Teddy off and put her in the corner and oh
that was a role I'm playing and I'm actually this
(04:52):
other person. No, And when people meet you out and
they fully they fully accept what they seen on television,
and you can't be anything other than that. And that's
sometimes hard to live with.
Speaker 1 (05:05):
And you can't even really if you show, if you
show emotion, you've shared too much, or you're you're trying
to get attention, or you're trying to get back on
a show, or you're looking for cloud or it's you're thirsty.
But if you don't share enough, you're boring. You're boring
or you know what, you're a hypocrite because you're not sharing.
(05:26):
It's it's such are you're hiding? I mean, all of it.
We've gotten every single criticism you can, you could you
could possibly get. But a lot of this episode we're
going to talk about, like when we first came out here,
We're gonna talk a little bit about nepotism. But first,
let's talk a little bit about just headlines that we've seen.
Speaker 2 (05:48):
Okay, let's do it.
Speaker 1 (05:50):
You want to take the first one.
Speaker 2 (05:51):
Sure. Beyonce Blue Ivy coordinate in their golden gowns as
they bring a strong bond to Mufasa. On Monday, December ninth,
Blue Ivy in her mother Beyonce walk the Red carpet
premiere form of Fasa The Lion King, and in a
video that's circulating on TikTok that starts with the Blue
Ivy taking photos alone, Beyonce comes in to also be
in one of the pictures, and to some viewers that
(06:12):
looked like Blue was annoyed for her mom like kind
of interfering with her moment. People online felt like Blue
should be thankful that she has the nepotism available to
walk on that red carpet. What do you think?
Speaker 1 (06:26):
Well, I think there's also another piece to this puzzle.
She's a teenager. She's one a teenager.
Speaker 2 (06:32):
Yeah, she's a teenager, and she's also a human being
outside of being Beyonce and jay Z's Yeah, like I think.
Speaker 1 (06:38):
About my kids and it doesn't matter if I'm in
a red carpet or not.
Speaker 2 (06:41):
But like, no, I was gonna think about it. I
wanted you to talk about how you grew up with
your father, Like you grew up with a very famous father.
Speaker 1 (06:48):
Yeah, but I also wasn't doing like red car We
lived in Indiana and Hiltonhead there was. It wasn't like
I was walking a bunch of red carpet.
Speaker 2 (06:55):
But it didn't matter.
Speaker 1 (06:56):
He was still just your dad. Yeah, but I think
that And there's also more levels, like people are like, oh,
she seemed annoyed, but in the same moment, what about
Beyonce probably wanted to protect Blue Ivy in that moment
because of everything in the press going on with jay Z. Well, like,
there's so many levels to everything.
Speaker 2 (07:16):
Beyonce is a mom trying to and their daughter. There
could you imagine living in the shadow of someone like Beyonce,
jay Z, Lebron James. I mean, you can look at
it in politics. It's just living in the shadow of
these very famous icons as parents. That's got to be
(07:36):
a mind trip on it own. Like these kids don't
get enough in my opinion, understanding, how are you ever
going to fill a great man and woman's shoes like that?
That's an impossible task. So of course, yes, she's lucky
to have the life that she lives, but guys, it
does not come free. She's paying a price, whether it's
(07:57):
you know, emotionally, physically, psychologically. You know, nothing in life
is easy, even if your parents are jay Z and
Beyonce got this job to break, and.
Speaker 1 (08:06):
I mean it also comes with I mean I didn't
have this, but like imagine being followed around with security
twenty four to seven, having.
Speaker 2 (08:14):
This zero freedom, zero freedom and zero room to mess
up zero And.
Speaker 1 (08:19):
When you do mess up, everybody is going to highlight it,
especially now that there's social media. There's everything. Like I mean,
we had a couple of polaroids when I was younger
of like my bad behavior, Like what man, we didn't
even have polaroids and.
Speaker 2 (08:32):
Go drop off the film and there is none.
Speaker 1 (08:35):
So ah, but I don't even I think she was
just being a teenager and it didn't bother me.
Speaker 2 (08:42):
It didn't bother me at all.
Speaker 1 (08:43):
And also she wanted to go to the premiere. Like
if she didn't want to go, I'm sure she could
have said, I don't want to go.
Speaker 2 (08:49):
She looks great, isn't she in the movie?
Speaker 1 (08:52):
In the movie, but like she's going to go, I mean, right,
But if she didn't want to be in a picture
with her mom, really.
Speaker 2 (08:59):
I'm sure leave Blue Ivy alone.
Speaker 1 (09:03):
She also was happy to be on stage with her
mom at Coachella.
Speaker 2 (09:09):
Also received criticism and came back stronger. Yeah and so
you know, like, let these children live, let these children grow,
let these and stop being So of course she's annoyed.
She's a teenager and I.
Speaker 1 (09:22):
Think that also, And we'll get into it because now
we react to Gwyneth Paltrow's daughter Apple. So Apple jumps
into a debutant's photo, that's Gwyneth Paltrow's daughter. After there
was mean girl backlash. This was on page six. Apple
Martin was labeled a mean girl over the weekend for
(09:44):
playfully jumping into a fellow debutant's photo. Can you pronounce
this detante?
Speaker 2 (09:51):
I don't know, And then the next word, I don't know,
but I know it said, listen, it's very fancy French
and this is a very you know, to be a
debutante is something, I mean, that's lovely and to be
in France and to make your debut. Yeah.
Speaker 1 (10:10):
Well, the French debutant from the viral video told People
Thursday that Apple twenty doesn't deserve an ounce of what
she's getting online. Why not, Well, they're all saying she's
a mean girl because she jumped into the photo.
Speaker 2 (10:24):
But Apple's been photographed since she was an embryo. Yeah, Like,
like again, is she not allowed to have fun?
Speaker 1 (10:33):
Are you just?
Speaker 2 (10:33):
Are you just sour grapes? Because Apples jumped in your photo?
Speaker 1 (10:37):
But she's not even sour grape. She's saying she doesn't
deserve she doesn't deserve it. Even the person whose photos
she jumped into.
Speaker 2 (10:44):
Wait, is sticking up for her. Oh, I'm misreading what
a ding dong?
Speaker 1 (10:48):
Sorry?
Speaker 2 (10:49):
Yes, thank you for the French debutante who agrees with us.
Speaker 1 (10:52):
Yeah, I mean in the video in question, I hate that.
Speaker 2 (10:57):
I look at me. I was always going to the negative.
Speaker 1 (10:59):
Yeah, she's like, anyways, fuck that French debutat.
Speaker 2 (11:02):
I just give that all back. I'm so very sorry.
Thank you to the lovely French debutante who stuck up
for Apple.
Speaker 1 (11:07):
Martin who we can't pronounce her name, but we're trying.
Loppin de Montemart was posing at her black gown when
she turned around and saw Apple walking into frame after
and striking pose after post at the time, she brushed
off the interruption and continued walking.
Speaker 2 (11:22):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (11:23):
Then. Apple also made headlines after the annual event for
an interaction with her date, Count Leohinkle Vaughan Donner. Smart.
Speaker 2 (11:33):
She sounds so euro and so fab it sounds so rich.
It really does. It sounds like something like we don't
have here in America.
Speaker 1 (11:41):
It sounds richer than Teddy Joe.
Speaker 2 (11:43):
Mellencamp or yeah, I don't even I'm not even saying
my name because there's a whole lot of shit that
comes to mind. So we got it.
Speaker 1 (11:50):
She was filmed visibly rolling her eyes during a conversation
with the New York University students. She was filmed being
a human being. Oh okay, yeah, yeah, and I'm sorry
Apple's been getting shit since they named her Apple.
Speaker 2 (12:04):
I agree, I agree. And she's going this daughter and
you know Chris's dad's yeah, like that's her dad. I mean, guys,
leave Apple alone again? Can these people just live?
Speaker 1 (12:16):
No? They can't. Here we go, Yeah, here's another one.
Speaker 2 (12:21):
Okay, well you know what. Okay, So Kim's getting a
blamed for you know, North and Chicago West being and
their father Kanye West music video. Well, if you can't
put your kids in your own music video, like, who cares,
it's his music video. Let them do what they want.
It's their money, their time, their children. If you don't
like it, well then I don't know what to say.
Speaker 1 (12:41):
And while some are giving the exes like they're proud
that they're giving their girls creative freedom. Other labeled the
opportunity as peak nepotism.
Speaker 2 (12:53):
Yeah, they have. I'm here, let me lay out the
facts for you. Nepotism has been around since like before
or you know, the dawn of man, whether it's a
bakery that you hand down to your sons or whether
you were the daughters of Kim and Kanye. I mean nepotism.
I mean we've had two fathersome presidents in the United
(13:14):
States of America, And yes, that's true. I looked it up.
And you know what else, there's nepotism in every field,
and this happens to be their children. Imagine being their children.
That's a very hard place to be. Yes, it's rich.
Yes you have things that other kids don't have, but
you also have this unrealistic pressure placed upon you that
most children will never understand and most adults will never understand.
Speaker 1 (13:38):
And I can say from personal experience, personal experience and
knowing other kids of famous people, famous people, it either
comes with an extreme level of trying to be perfect,
of perfectionism U or the complete opposite.
Speaker 2 (13:59):
Yeah, I've seen.
Speaker 1 (14:00):
Where it's like you're just like fuck it. I want
to be completely the opposite of anything that.
Speaker 2 (14:06):
Yeah, and some people go so far as to change
their name and never talk to their family again. Yeah,
and it's just it runs a gamut. I mean, there's
no fameous not.
Speaker 1 (14:14):
But I don't get hating on the kids for it,
like you can't.
Speaker 2 (14:18):
They're just kids.
Speaker 1 (14:19):
They're just kids.
Speaker 2 (14:20):
And you know, I.
Speaker 1 (14:23):
Don't know, do you think it's do.
Speaker 2 (14:26):
You think it's unfair or do you think when is
the world fair? Right? When has that been? Uh? There
is no fair in this life or this world that
that doesn't even enter the equation.
Speaker 1 (14:36):
Well, I mean, and you can even go, like even
in the South, like whether it's nepotism or not. But
I remember meeting you know, blah blah blah the fourth
Oh yeah, absolutely, you know he had money. Well, of course,
why would we name them. It was a family, it
was a family line. Nobody nobody said for the third
of the fourth if you're broke. Yeah, it's like we're
(14:57):
changing up, changing up the entire situation in here. People
are asking me, do I feel that nepotism has helped
me and are hurt me in my career? I mean,
I would say that the lessons that my dad instilled
in me and working very hard. I was going to
say that has helped me, Like there's been having your dad.
(15:19):
He's been very very hard on me. But he also
you know today, he's the first person that called me
this morning and he's like, you know, just checking in
on you. How is it going? And so I think
it can be challenging, Like but I think, yes, having
somebody with a famous last name as a relative can
(15:39):
get you in the door, but.
Speaker 2 (15:40):
You have to carry the ball from there.
Speaker 1 (15:42):
You have to carry the ball from there. And then
also it can hurt you, like in the same way.
Like people's favorite thing, other than that I'm boring, their
second favorite thing to say about me is that I'm
John Mellencamp's.
Speaker 2 (15:55):
Daughter, So therefore this is all because of him.
Speaker 1 (15:59):
Yeah, and I don't deserve to be a human being,
and you know, yes, I'm riding on his coattails and
so there is challenges and that can't feel good at all.
I mean, I think it's weird because it goes back
to that original conversation is if I if I say
something like, well, I mean I moved out to California
(16:19):
at seventeen and I've been supporting myself and I don't
have a trust fund, and you know, I've had a
million rejections. People are like, oh, what do you want
a pity party?
Speaker 2 (16:29):
No, it's just actually a fact. Yeah, Like it's actually
to show you that all of this advantage you thought
I got really wasn't there. Yeah, And I mean, I
mean some I'm sure something's but certainly, Yeah, you've worked
very hard. Your dad has not and John don't come
for me, but you know, I mean.
Speaker 1 (16:46):
He has not. No, and I mean there's he's laid
it on you very real. Yeah, And I would imagine
that a lot of other parents have done the same.
Speaker 2 (16:56):
I know some very successful men that did not hand
their children their fortune or their business simply because anti quote,
they don't have the talent. But I think also, I
mean I've seen that, and I've seen it in business.
I see it in like, you know, hardcore business, like
they don't have the talent. I'm not doing that.
Speaker 1 (17:18):
But also, what what bens the like would you be
able to like, would people be able to say that
your son is nepotent.
Speaker 2 (17:26):
Like, well, my son's a cops and there's that in
the streets. I don't know if that's anything to be.
Speaker 1 (17:33):
But you see what I'm saying, like, how does that
not exist everywhere then exactly? And like how do you
shelter your kids from being considered You can't?
Speaker 2 (17:44):
I mean, and it's just people are going to you
have to.
Speaker 1 (17:46):
I think that.
Speaker 2 (17:47):
Look, at some point, when you're in the public, you're
going to have to accept the fact that you have
to pay a tax for this, this public life, and
part of it is being misunderstood, uh rushed to judgment
and things like oh, you only got here because of
your father's last name or your mother is Kim Kardashian,
therefore you have our no value and you know, which
(18:07):
is not true, and that's not fair. But when is
life fair?
Speaker 1 (18:12):
Life isn't fair, which brings us to fame our next
thing that or infamy. Can you give me the definition
of Yeah, it's being known for not good shit is.
Speaker 2 (18:24):
One of my lawyers looked at me and said, hey,
you're not famous, you're infamous. So I was like, give
an al capone infamous, you're infamous.
Speaker 1 (18:33):
I was like, great, that's that's yeah. What were your dreams.
Speaker 2 (18:38):
As Okay, So my dream was always to perform, meaning
that from the time I was about three or four,
I would create shows, even though they were nothing. I
would get into a closet, ask my mother to introduce me,
and I would literally jump up on like the coffee table,
like in front of us, and sing and dance for
my mother, my grandmother, anybody that was listening and watching.
(19:00):
And from that, my mom put me in dance and
children's theater and it never stopped. I went to a
great performing arts high school in Atlanta, which is no
longer there. At the time it was called Northside School
of Performing Arts. And then I wanted to continue my
life of performing and moved to New York City and
settled in Los Angeles about eight years later. Seven years later.
(19:22):
So for me, performance has all and I managed to
take long breaks in between. I was married twice and
when I and became a mom, so I wasn't performing then,
but that was always gnawing at my heart, like to perform,
to create, and when I was living Tom's life, and
I really was living Tom's life up for about seven
years and then I said, you know what, Tom, I
(19:43):
need to create. I need to do things like it
was calling It's always been inside. So fame for me
was not the I'm going to be rich and famous. Yes,
that is something that sort of affirms your I don't know,
your pro jax or whatever it is that you do. Hey,
people like it, you know, applause. But I didn't do
(20:04):
it for the applause. I did it because I fucking
loved it, and I love the feeling of being out.
Speaker 1 (20:09):
There on stage. Yea.
Speaker 2 (20:11):
And even now it's like it's it's great and I'm
grateful for everything that's happened to me. But there's also
days where it's like, jeez.
Speaker 1 (20:20):
This is a lot.
Speaker 2 (20:21):
This is a lot. Well, I mean, and I don't
even have I have a sliver, a sliver of the
attention of these people that we were talking about early,
A sliver, you know.
Speaker 1 (20:31):
Well, I mean two years you may have had.
Speaker 2 (20:34):
For two years, I was a roll two years you may,
but for two years ago I was. Yeah, it was
and not for all the right reasons. So it would
be different if it was like, oh, Erica, you were
celebrated because it was so great.
Speaker 1 (20:50):
We were in the Lion King.
Speaker 2 (20:52):
Yeah, you're in the Lion King and you you really
killed it, are you?
Speaker 3 (20:56):
Yeah?
Speaker 2 (20:56):
You know that's not what I was sure, It's just
the Yeah, let me know, it was none of that.
It was let's make let's let's be on a reality
TV show. Let's have competitors, competing networks make docs about you.
Let's have every fucking tabloid write about you, put you
on everything. And like I said.
Speaker 1 (21:14):
They asked me to be in that doc. By the way, I.
Speaker 2 (21:17):
Was thank you. I really appreciate that. Thank you. You know,
there was a couple of people that have that reached
out to me and were like, hey, this came across
my desk just so you know, no way, Yeah, And
I appreciate everybody that did that because that's it's like,
that's gross.
Speaker 1 (21:30):
I mean, granted, I know that on to teasing the
pot I recaptured, but like, there's a there's a there's
a good there's a limit. But what do you say
to people because this was this is the perception that
you get and I'm I'm talking to not as somebody
that's one of my good friends, but it's the perception
of sure, watching on the show, you know, you were married,
(21:51):
you got a divorce, you you went to go trace
chase your dream, leave the other stuff behind, and then
you met an older man who funded the entire who
funded the entire vanity project?
Speaker 2 (22:01):
Yes, not true. I've been getting paid in the entertainment
business since i was a little kid, even though it
was a local you know, in Atlanta, Georgia, where I'm
born and raised. Yeah, I was working since I was
little and meaning I wanted to. I wanted to do
these things, whether it was commercials, whether it was theater
and being on Housewives did nothing more than take my project,
(22:24):
which was already on its feet and expose it. Took
it out of the clubs and took it to a
more mainstream environment.
Speaker 1 (22:31):
How long were you performing in the clubs and stuff
before you booked Housewif.
Speaker 2 (22:35):
I started Erica Jane, I want to say, I think
two thousand and seven was my first record, and then
I don't know what year I came on, so whatever,
I don't Yeah.
Speaker 1 (22:44):
But do you think that what was like the when
you first started with Tom. Was there a time where
he was like, I don't want you performing or did
you just mold your life into his?
Speaker 2 (22:58):
I molded my life because what my life was was
his life was great. Yeah, So I molded my life
into his life and I and I got exposure to
an entirely different life, and so that was wonderful until
you know again here says this need. Yeah, until this
(23:18):
need to like, hey, I want to create again. I
feel this again, and I think that that's what happens.
We step away, we come back, We step away, we
come back. Was there a defining moment? Yes, there was.
I received an invitation to a club show of a
woman that I knew through Tom's social circle. But I
(23:41):
flipped it over and I saw that it was choreographed
by one of my dear friends from performing arts high
school that had worked with like heavily with Michael Jackson
and everyone else, and I mean like a real fucking
like a real dancer. And I called him and I said,
what are you doing on this project? And he literally said,
oh yeah, you know. He said, well what are you
doing and I said, well, in terms of like performing
(24:04):
and I said, well nothing, really, I haven't. It's well,
if it's possible for her, meaning the invitation, the woman
on the invitation, is possible for you. So shout out
to Travis Payne, thank you. And he planted the seed
and helped me grow Erica Jane and then Mikey and
I took it and grew it more. So we just
kept going. And that's the truth. And look my hometown.
(24:29):
You know, I know, I'm fifty three, but like the
kids that came up, we came up together and performing
our school, we turned out some amazing talent, some really
cool people. I mean you basically when you came out
of our dance program, you went on tour with Michael
or Janet, Paula Abdul or you went onto Broadway like
there was no and let's not forget you did go
onto Broadway. I did, but much later in my life.
(24:50):
But like I'm talking straight out of twelfth grade. Yeah,
they didn't go. They were like right out of there
on world tours. And that was when you were making money,
like they were buying houses and shit.
Speaker 1 (25:02):
Do you remember, like what your biggest rejection was.
Speaker 2 (25:05):
I've had so many. I remember people telling me, you know,
you're not talented, you can't sing, you can't dance. But
and I was like, no, no, no, no, no, I don't
think you seem to understand. It's all about also how
you see yourself as an artist. There are there are
people that are vocalists, there are people that are dancers.
There are people that entertain like it's all of that.
(25:26):
I don't think you are what you think you are
probably is the biggest rejection.
Speaker 1 (25:31):
What it's your biggest insecurity.
Speaker 2 (25:34):
I think my biggest insecurity sometimes is not feeling prepared.
I don't know how to explain that any other way
than not feeling prepared enough. And it's hard to explain,
but like, have I gone over this enough? Have I?
Speaker 1 (25:53):
And you can see it in your demeanor when you
don't feel.
Speaker 2 (25:56):
Like you're prepared, yes, And when you don't know, I
feel like an edgy to And when I don't know,
I feel like I don't know a piece of music
well enough, or I haven't worked out the kinks in something,
or I don't know the choreography well enough, I feel rushed.
Speaker 1 (26:11):
You can see it.
Speaker 2 (26:12):
And because you don't get into that flow state, Yeah,
you don't get into that relaxed state that people like
when you can throw away all of the all of
the stuff and just really live in the moment. And
that's what I crave the most is living in that
moment on stage is nothing like it?
Speaker 1 (26:26):
Is it an escape? You think?
Speaker 2 (26:28):
I say that all the time.
Speaker 1 (26:30):
And what was there? And I know I'm grilling Erica
right now, but I'll switch over it will But like,
was your would you consider your mom the stage mom?
Speaker 2 (26:40):
Yes, I think that it well, not only my mother,
but my grandmother. In the best sense possible, I think
that I was living their unrealized dreams through two generations.
And there was a moment when I was like, can
I just because it was constant, like it was company
rehearsal on the weekend ends and went to performing arts
(27:01):
high school, you know, can I step back? I'm not really,
but Erica, if you step back, you lose time. And
so they instilled a whole lot of sense of urgency
into me.
Speaker 1 (27:14):
And would you say that, like your mom is still
involved in your career?
Speaker 2 (27:18):
Yeah? My mom is like that was terrible, and I'm like,
can you not come? You know, I don't like that.
I really thought I was like pause pause, personally, are
you fuck?
Speaker 1 (27:30):
Yeah? I was gonna I was about I thought you
were gonna say fuck now.
Speaker 2 (27:33):
I was like, no, if anyone can strike at my
the deepest, most open wound of myself, it's my mother.
And you can see it on the show. You can
see how I just start to turn on her because
that mouth of hers is ruthless because it cuts me
(27:53):
in a way that nobody can.
Speaker 1 (27:54):
Yeah. Yeah, and.
Speaker 2 (27:57):
Is not nice at all, very ugly, very ugly. And
I've shown that and I've tried really hard to work
on it. I really have. I discussed it in therapy,
I've talked about it with my mother. It's just something
I have to get over. Yeah, you know, something that
I have to get over. I also say that follow
your dreams.
Speaker 1 (28:28):
How did you pick the name Erica Jane?
Speaker 2 (28:31):
Shit, I couldn't come up with anything else. I mean,
it's really not that deep. I just wanted to be Erica,
you know, because I thought that disconnecting from I didn't
want to be Erica da. You know, you don't want
to be a real name, Like that's not exciting. The thing,
the whole thing about being an artist or having an
artistic project is escapism. I've always said Erica Jane was
an escape artist. It was an escape from all life
(28:52):
that I was living at that time. Fantasy, love, escape, glitz,
glamor of fine illw my six words to describe Erica Jane.
But it was the only thing that we came up
with at the time. I don't have some magical sort
of Is it inspired by Jane Mansfield? Sure?
Speaker 1 (29:11):
I mean, but it's funny that you say that. As
you said that, you know you wanted that name getting
into nepotism in my dad he wanted to get away
from his stage name.
Speaker 2 (29:25):
Really.
Speaker 1 (29:26):
Yeah, they you know, back when he first started coming up,
they gave him Johnny Couger, That's right, and then he
spent years and years and years of his life trying
to be John Mellencamp, fighting it. So then it went
from Johnny Couger to John Couger to John Cougar Mellencamp.
Speaker 2 (29:41):
You know, like how old was your father when he
was signed? Like his first his.
Speaker 1 (29:45):
First big hit was in nineteen eighty one, the year
I was born. So, I mean those could see it.
Speaker 3 (29:50):
Jack and Diane, I think it was Jack and Diane
and it was that album I remember was thirty six
and I can see the album cover in my head
and I can remember that that song was.
Speaker 2 (30:01):
I mean you talk about heavy rotation like that song
was a funny.
Speaker 1 (30:05):
It's a smash. Yeah. And that's my mom in the video.
Speaker 2 (30:07):
Oh my gosh, I'm going on tonight? Is it really?
Speaker 1 (30:10):
Yeah?
Speaker 2 (30:10):
That's OK.
Speaker 1 (30:13):
That's my mom sucking on chili dogs outside.
Speaker 2 (30:15):
The tastey freeze and to think. But I and when
I met you, I was like, wow, I've listened to
her dad like for forever.
Speaker 1 (30:25):
But it is funny, I mean, the way people you know,
there's an escapism version, and then there's also the part
of like when you when you want, when you want
to achieve your goals, you may sign on and do
anything right even if it's not something you want to. Well.
Speaker 2 (30:44):
I think that that's also how that business was and
is still is that they change and mold you to
what is palatable and what sells. I mean, and now
now it's the complete opposite. If you're not your authentic self,
you're not selling shit.
Speaker 1 (30:57):
So I mean they did the same thing with like
you know, old Hollywood movies.
Speaker 2 (31:01):
Nobody was her real name, Marilyn Monroe was not her name.
Norma Jean Martinsen was you know, Marilyn Monroe, Rita Cansino
was Rita Hayworth.
Speaker 1 (31:08):
Yeah, And they would be signed onto one particular you
know studio, and I had to do all the movies
within that, and then they get loaned out.
Speaker 2 (31:16):
Yeah, and they would get loaned out. So I mean
it's kind of like being on Brava. I'm just chidding,
my god, nobody wants to borrow.
Speaker 1 (31:25):
You right now.
Speaker 2 (31:26):
Don't you ever say that again in my presence. I'm
telling you better stop talking negatively.
Speaker 1 (31:31):
I have if I didn't laugh at myself.
Speaker 2 (31:33):
No, but there's there's a limit. Okay, fine, okay, you
can have that's it. That's your one stop deprecating. Do
not say that again.
Speaker 1 (31:41):
I do appreciate that, at least, you know when I'm
being self deprecating now versus when we first met and
you were just.
Speaker 2 (31:46):
Like, gosh, well that's also Look, how do you know
what I How do you feel right now now that
you're so you know, all of this really glaring attention
is turned onto you. How do you feel I mean,
and I mean this genuinely, like I'm not trying to
bullshit you, Like, how do you feel about what were
(32:08):
your hopes and dreams as a performer and now you've
never been bigger? Being known for something that's painful? Yeah,
and that sucks.
Speaker 1 (32:16):
It sucks. I would say that like when I first
came out to California, you know, I had grown up
riding horses, and I got all of my I don't
know my confidence by winning getting those blue ribbons. Well,
you were a professional as a teenager. People don't realize this, Ted,
he was a professionalist team. Yeah, like I was, you
know one at Madison Square Garden. It was it was
(32:39):
my entire life. And then I had gotten a full
ride to college. But in contingent with riding on the team.
When I said it was by the way, I don't
want to say, okay, but to ride on the team.
But then when I said that, I wouldn't I didn't
want to ride on the team because I was an
idiot seventeen year old and said I don't want to
ride on the college team because collegiate riding as a step.
(33:01):
But it just was a stupid It's a fucking man,
It's okay. But then they were like, well then we
don't want you. You have shitty grades.
Speaker 2 (33:08):
The mean we got you over here is because you
were good.
Speaker 1 (33:11):
And that's when I decided to move to California and
I my parents were like, well, yeah, I mean you can.
And they were divorced at this time, a million years
and you know we did.
Speaker 2 (33:20):
They say to you, how dare you turn down a
full ride? I can't imagine your dad being like, hey,
what's wrong with you? Yeah?
Speaker 1 (33:25):
And I mean and then he was like, well that's fine.
If you're gonna if you don't want to ride in college,
well I you will still take you. And I was like, well,
I'm not going. I'm going to California. I want to
be an actress.
Speaker 2 (33:36):
Is that what you wanted to be?
Speaker 1 (33:37):
Yeah, I mean I didn't, but I didn't really I
just wanted to be seen, Okay, I get it. It
wasn't like I was in acting school for all these years.
I mean, I probably you know, I mess. I met
my I started at CA in the mailroom. I met
my first roommate and my first acting class i'd ever taken.
Speaker 2 (33:54):
Did your dad get you the job at CIA? In
the mail room?
Speaker 1 (33:56):
He got me that interview, baby, He got me that
interview with Arlene Newman. May she rest in peace.
Speaker 2 (34:02):
Well, it's not like you were doing anything interesting other
than delivering the mail, which is, as everybody knows, the
key starting position.
Speaker 1 (34:09):
It is the key. I was the only person in
the mail room that hadn't graduated from an Ivy League college.
So it was a touch of nepotism that got good
for you. But then I got myself on a partner's desk.
Hell yeah. So after a year of being in the
mayroom all of those things, I worked my way up
and kind of became that quirky, self deprecating taty joe
(34:31):
that everybody kind of wanted. Sure, they were like on
their desk, Yeah, we want you, we want you to
work for me. And it taught me a lot. And
it also taught me that I came from being a
big fish in a small pond to the smallest fish
and the biggest ocean, and the ocean.
Speaker 2 (34:51):
And the fucking the ocean intimating out here, yeah, well anywhere,
but you know, it can get intimidating.
Speaker 1 (34:56):
And I, you know, had We've talked about this, but
I had grown up with eating issues and body dysmorphia
and all that kind of stuff that comes with riding
horses and skin tight beige pants and well did you
have to weigh in for those things? You don't have
to weigh in and hunter jumper, But it's like you're
almost rewarded for.
Speaker 2 (35:16):
Being tiny and small and looking like you don't exist
on the horse, and especially.
Speaker 1 (35:20):
When you're somebody that's my height and I don't have
long legs.
Speaker 2 (35:22):
Yeah, you have to be teeny tiny.
Speaker 1 (35:24):
Yeah, like, so it was kind of that. And then
I came out to California and I'd gone to the
same school from third grade till twelfth grade, so like,
and I rode with the same people, so I never
had to kind of make new friends. Oh shit, And
all of a sudden, I'm out here to tell me,
I'm like, oh, hell, you know, and I'm I'm living
(35:45):
in the studio apartment, barely making do.
Speaker 2 (35:48):
Like, let's just say that your dad gave you no money.
You're not feeling this part of the story. Your father said, fuck.
Speaker 1 (35:54):
You, he gave they My parents gave me my Jetta.
We packed that jetts, got rid of the Grimlin, we
got rid of the Gremlin, I got the Jetta, We
shifted out, and then that was that was the end
of it.
Speaker 2 (36:05):
That was good luck.
Speaker 1 (36:05):
You figured out.
Speaker 2 (36:06):
You figured it out, which is kind of it's great,
but it's also like, could you imagine turning slate loose
right in a few years and being like, go work
it out? No, but not, I mean think about that,
they basically say, and that you go.
Speaker 1 (36:19):
But I mean to be perfectly honest and that I'm
not trying to like shit on my mom. But I
had been kind of figuring it out.
Speaker 2 (36:26):
Yeah yeah, your whole life, My.
Speaker 1 (36:28):
Whole life, you know, so that part was but adding
in that like loneliness of being in a big place.
And then that's when I kind of, I guess, in
lack of a better way of saying, it started eating
my feelings. And I remember that first. You know, at
this point, I come out to LA, I get you know,
(36:49):
things are going all right. I'm making a couple of friends,
I'm doing.
Speaker 2 (36:51):
At the job.
Speaker 1 (36:52):
I got the job, I got a manager. I got
those head shots with like the belly button piercing that
I had just gotten, you know, like my pencil thin eyebrows.
And then that's when.
Speaker 2 (37:04):
Did you go to class? Did you study?
Speaker 1 (37:05):
I did I see study?
Speaker 2 (37:07):
Yes? Uh?
Speaker 1 (37:09):
Not Stey what what? Yes?
Speaker 2 (37:11):
What?
Speaker 1 (37:12):
What helped me?
Speaker 2 (37:12):
I was going to say Stella Adler because it sounded
like you were going to say that, but that doesn't
sound right.
Speaker 1 (37:15):
It's not. It was Stella Adler later, but before that
it was I don't know because I didn't go I'm
not I'm going to hear but either or I mean,
it was like a chorus line pretend to be a tree.
Speaker 2 (37:28):
You know how I love that? How what the fuck
is the tree? Like, I've never even thought about that.
Speaker 1 (37:33):
Explain how you'd feel if you were the Hollywood sign.
Speaker 2 (37:37):
Old and dilapidated with.
Speaker 1 (37:39):
The l missing, because somebody, that's what I was saying,
anybody I jumped off. But yeah, and then there was
a moment where I was going on auditions and I
was also I was a hostess at Mister Chow and
your O Chow, and things were just kind of spiraling.
I booked the job. I talked about this on the show,
and then after pilot season, we kind of started like
(38:02):
we had that second round. We're like, we're all about
to start filming the pilot and I had gained probably
fifty pounds.
Speaker 2 (38:09):
Oh no, yeah, I remember.
Speaker 1 (38:10):
Yes, they called their manager and said she either needs
to lose weight or we're going to fire her. We're
going to fire And I never recovered from that. I
never recovered from it. And I also never went on
another audition again.
Speaker 2 (38:24):
Yeah, it took it out of you.
Speaker 1 (38:25):
Yeah, Like I was like that, and then I was
so bitter of course about.
Speaker 2 (38:31):
It and demoralized. I mean, Jesus Christ, could you imagine
lose fifty pounds that we're going to.
Speaker 1 (38:34):
Fucking fire you. Yeah, like we're done.
Speaker 2 (38:37):
The girl that we hired is not the girl that's
showing up here. Yeah.
Speaker 1 (38:41):
And then it just became, you know, fifteen years of
living in California and you know, just putzing around trying
to figure out what I was going to do. You know,
like I worked in agencies, I went and the fact that.
Speaker 2 (38:56):
You never went on an audition again is so crushing.
That just lets me know how deeply that wounded you.
Speaker 1 (39:02):
Yeah, And I mean I remember going home for that
Thanksgiving like that that year after, and I just had
kept gaining more and more weight, and I just remember,
this is not judgment of my family, but I remember
walking in in my family's faces because there was an
Instagram then, so.
Speaker 2 (39:21):
They were like shocked when you walked through the door.
Speaker 1 (39:24):
Yeah, they were shocked.
Speaker 2 (39:25):
And it was not in a good way.
Speaker 1 (39:26):
Not not in a good way. And so that's kind
of always carried with me. But then, you know, you
take that pain and to transmute it, and you transmute
it and I kind of started finding my way and
then you know, I lost it again. And that's and
that's really the long, the long and short of it
is my life has been this and and so is.
Speaker 2 (39:47):
Yours, of course, And I think that that's, you know,
I hate to be so cliche, but that's also like
I'm gonna and you guys can criticize us later. That's
the hero's journey, I mean, because you have it, you
lose it, you regain it. You you know, you're mad,
you're sad, you're bitter, but you overcome and then things change.
The most important thing I think for me, and I
think for you, is to like I told you, you can
(40:10):
do anything but quit, and you will again take this
challenge and overcome and make it something else. And I
think the way that you've you were on housewives and
then you took that and turned yourself into a really
great podcaster and you've had a lot of success is
not only it's very admirable, but so many people would
(40:30):
have walked off in defeat and you didn't do that.
And you have to you have to acknowledge that in
yourself that you've created something else out of that, and
you'll create something else out of this experience.
Speaker 1 (40:42):
And I have to also like tell you, thank you.
I'm gonna get it a much right now. I have
to tell you thank you because it it didn't mean
a lot to me that you said yes to me,
of course, and it did mean a lot to me
because there are so many people that want to jump
on the bed wagon, yeah, of hating or making you
(41:03):
feel like you're less than or not enough. And I
think that the fact that you chose our connection over
what other people thought is why this became so successful.
And I really really appreciated it, and like you did
it at a time that like you really didn't have to.
Speaker 2 (41:18):
Yeah, But I am your friend, Yeah, And I also
have been where you are, and I also know that
this too shall pass, And I believe in you, and
I respect you, and I know that you will overcome
because you are a hard fucking worker and you've never
allowed anything since I've known you to take you to
(41:38):
a place where you didn't fight back and fight back
on your own behalf. And so I'm very proud of
thank you.
Speaker 1 (41:44):
And I mean, we may fight back the wrong way.
Speaker 2 (41:46):
But nobody's perfect, and you are a human being, and
you're allowed to have these sort of experiences. The difference
between us and others is that ours is in the
public and people get to enjoy cheer us on or
criticize us. It's all good at the end of the day. Yeah,
now I have.
Speaker 1 (42:02):
A tear, I know. Okay, So our next question that
people are asking.
Speaker 2 (42:26):
I think, like, why did you both want to become
a housewife? Did you ever watch reality TV before? I
did not?
Speaker 1 (42:32):
You know, I did not watch this show before I
got I didn't either, But people never believe me when
I say that.
Speaker 2 (42:36):
They didn't for me either. I said I knew who
the women were because at that time.
Speaker 1 (42:41):
Oh yeah, people always going to say, we saw that
picture of you and Kyle when you're in like the.
Speaker 2 (42:45):
Air, Yeah we met its two completely different noses and
knows ago Yeah, no to both of us, by the way.
And she doesn't care that I say this, but a
nos ago and yeah, I had met her at some
party and she was kind of she was the thing
about Kyle people don't understand. And I said this a
(43:07):
long time ago. Kyle had grew up in this business.
But she doesn't take it that seriously. Do you know
what I'm saying? Like, Oh, I you know, she's always
been friendly to strangers and to everyone else. And she
and so she was I was a stranger. She took
a picture with me. There you go. That's all it is.
Speaker 1 (43:22):
Yeah. People try to make it like, oh, she's been
dying to get on the show for years because this
one photo.
Speaker 2 (43:28):
No, No, it's kind of bizarre. I would have never
seen myself on a show like this.
Speaker 1 (43:32):
So how did you actually?
Speaker 2 (43:34):
I told you I, Tom and I were friends with
David Foster and Yolanda. We had gone out to their
house one day and she came down not feeling great
in her robe. She was very sick, and we were
all talking, the four of us, and she literally said,
have you thought about being a housewife? And I said no,
And she said, I'm texting my boss. We've already kind
of started, but we need someone, and that was Alex Baskin. Yeah,
(44:00):
and here I am. I got the job, and here
I am. It was really something that was so different
than anything I could have ever seen. I didn't know
what I was doing or what it was because it
wasn't like a five six, seven eight, yeah go over here.
Seeing this note, I was like, what are we doing? So, yeah,
what about you?
Speaker 1 (44:21):
For me, it was slightly different. So I had said
I never had gone on Edition again after that incident,
but then cut to you know, we're ten or fifteen
years later. I've had the I've had my first two kids.
I was in and I've been open about this. I
(44:42):
was in like a rough part of my life again. Yeah,
like you know, I'd had multiple miscarriages, I had IVF.
I was struggling because it was what I forgot about
how that it was the first time that I wasn't
making my own money.
Speaker 2 (44:54):
Oh wow, which is a big deal for you and
you know who else is a big deal for you?
And Kyle really bonded over that. Yeah, like both of
you like making my own money because I was always like, yeah, whatever,
let me give it to whomever. The two of you
are very in sync about that.
Speaker 1 (45:10):
Yeah. I mean I always had my own separate bank
account and for the first time ever, I didn't have
anything in there, that anything, and it was just making
me honestly unhinged. And that's when I started All In,
not as a company, just I started. It was La
Workout Junkie. You guys actually made me change the name whatever,
(45:31):
but La Workout Junkie, which was like, I want to
change my life today. And they followed along on my
journey on changing my life and then it turned into
a business and all of that. So I'd grown a
very small Instagram falling. We're talking like ten thousand people
right throughout my journey and my business. And I had
been reached out to you know, you get those emails
(45:52):
from like casting sure, and I had been reached out
to be on a different show like Bunham and Murray,
like the Ogs, the Ogs of reality TV. And I
filmed the pilot and it was I mean, a lot
of the girls from that show have come on and
they and they did really well, and then the show
(46:13):
continued on. But after I filmed the pilot, I was like,
I absolutely cannot do that show.
Speaker 2 (46:21):
Like I was like this, was it combative or just
conflict or just sit right with you?
Speaker 1 (46:26):
So staged? And like I just I felt like it
didn't feel right. And so I emailed my old friend
from C A A And said, Hey, did I sign
a contract that I can't get out?
Speaker 2 (46:44):
Wow?
Speaker 1 (46:45):
And turned out and she said you can know. She
said you can get out of it, and she goes,
but while we're on the topic, would you do Real Housewives?
And I said, I've never watched it because I watched
The Bachelor of Real Rules like, but I wasn't at
that point. I was pretty I was younger, you know
(47:05):
what I was gonna say.
Speaker 2 (47:06):
I always thought you were too young to be on
the show because you were on your way up. You
need bitches that are on their way down. Now you've
got all the dirt under your nails, you'll ever need
to be on.
Speaker 1 (47:20):
But yeah, so that's how it happened. And then the
entire like process started where you have your interviews, your
test seetings or test shoots, all of that. But I
kind of knew the second I had my test shoot
with like Chris Colin and everybody. I was like, I'm
going to get the drop. Like, I kind of knew it.
But I mean I didn't keep it for that long.
Speaker 2 (47:38):
Well, you kept it long enough. I think that you
kept it long enough to learn a lot of things
and then to you know, recreate yourself, which is.
Speaker 1 (47:46):
I mean, it did make me realize that I wasn't
my full self. Yeah.
Speaker 2 (47:52):
That's the one thing about turning a camera onto yourself
that I think sometimes people who aren't in our business
don't have the luxury of doing, which is to see yourself.
Speaker 1 (48:02):
Yeah and go oh god, yeah.
Speaker 2 (48:05):
Wow, that's really how I speak to others, or that's
how I allow others to speak to me, or I
look crazy.
Speaker 1 (48:14):
No, I was like a shell of a human being.
Yeah you can, and I can assure you. I'm going
through a way fucking harder time now than I was then.
Speaker 2 (48:21):
Yeah, but you got chops now.
Speaker 1 (48:23):
But like it took a little time and it was like, yeah,
I mean this, this is naturally who I am. I
just I deflated in that moment.
Speaker 2 (48:33):
But that's a that's a very common thing to do.
It's like when people say, oh, you're so much different,
like when we have this conversation. Of course I'm different.
I'm having a conversation with a friend. I'm not in
a shark tank right now. Yeah, I'm just open and
able to talk to you about certain things.
Speaker 1 (48:51):
What would you say the biggest pro and con are of.
Speaker 2 (48:55):
Being on the show, of being in reality television. I
think the biggest pro is I've it's you know, kicked
up in a whole bunch of doors. For me, the
biggest con has been, you know, what I went through
publicly with Tom and subsequently everything after that, and having
to live through that and pick yourself up and rebuild,
(49:16):
which has been the hardest. What about you?
Speaker 1 (49:18):
I would say the biggest pro is has one been
that I've been able to kind of create all of
this afterwards. Yeah, and that I've had the support of
all of you other ladies that have come in and
been like, yeah, let's let's go, let's do this, let's
make magic together. So that's been a pro along with
(49:39):
you know, parts of you know, financial things, but also friendships. Yeah,
like I have developed some real true friends, but friends
that when you are down, they're still there. There's still there,
like down down. So that's the pros. And I've been
able to give my you know, my family a different
life than I probably could have if it never happened,
(50:03):
And the cons are I also gave my family a
different life than.
Speaker 2 (50:09):
They could well set you know, you could have lived privately.
Someone said this to me, if you weren't on a
reality TV show, what would it have been like the
fallout with Tom? And I said, well, look, it would
have been a very bad legal story. Yeah, nobde cares.
But because you're on TV, then it becomes something else,
bigger and its own monster. And I'm sure you feel
(50:29):
the same way.
Speaker 1 (50:30):
Yeah, And then you get into this feeling of your like,
do I do I fight back super hard or do
I just sit chilly? Or do I do that?
Speaker 2 (50:38):
Like there are no right or wrong.
Speaker 1 (50:39):
They're no right or wrong. There's no right a wrong,
and I'm sure I'll keep making mistakes, guys, so just
stay tune.
Speaker 2 (50:43):
Yeah, but you know what, again, there's no handbook for
everybody can assume that they know what you're going through.
And yes, there's been a lot of divorces and whatever
separations or whatever I went through just but to do
it in a public forum is a whole other animal.
And there are very few people that you can call
(51:04):
and say I feel like I'm gonna blow my head
off and they go, yes, that's normal. Hold on a second,
let me talk to you, and you're gonna be okay.
Speaker 1 (51:14):
And I think something that I have learned through this
that also has been pretty great with my friends, whether
they're show friends I met through the show or friends
that my you know, mommy and me or whatever it was,
is the ability to have the strength to say, actually
I don't want to talk right now, why and that's
really fucking sad? Or I'm really I'm having a day,
(51:36):
or hey can we go, let's go to line for
let's do that. Like we are allowed to have highs
and lows, And I think for so long I didn't
believe I was allowed to have those.
Speaker 2 (51:46):
Why you just thought you had to be on all
the time, all the time.
Speaker 1 (51:49):
Jesus, I thought.
Speaker 2 (51:51):
That too, until I had nothing but lows and I
gave up. It crushed me so hard, Like the lows
were so hard that I was like, I can't, I
I just can't. Like it's it's really from A to B,
it's really from nine am to eleven am. I would
check in with my therapist like every like her goal
for me was every two to three hours, Like, if
(52:13):
you can just make it till noon, consider that a goal.
Like really she was like, yeah, that's how bad the
shit is. And I feel badly for anybody that's listening
that doesn't have that kind of support, because it is
important as human beings and it's just women that you know,
we go through these things and we really should be there.
(52:35):
I know it's hard and it sounds cliche, but for
one another more so than we really are, and stop
judging everybody. You're fucked up.
Speaker 1 (52:43):
To listen and it's fine. I think it's okay. To like,
if you want to make small talk and gossip about
them and fucking do it.
Speaker 2 (52:49):
I think that's wonderful and that's how we put ourselves
out here. But also too, just remember when you're pointing
in that mirror, they're two at you, right, that's two
fingers pointing right.
Speaker 1 (53:00):
Well, thank you guys for tuning in to another episode
of Diamonds in the Rough. What should we get into
next week?
Speaker 2 (53:07):
I don't know, but I think that we have we
need to get our claws into something good. How about
in the comments? Oh, give us some suggestions if you
if you see something you know that you want to
maybe talk about, give us a little suggestion, Give.
Speaker 1 (53:22):
Us a suggestion, and we could even comment on the comments.
Speaker 2 (53:27):
I like that too.
Speaker 1 (53:28):
I always should clap back to our comments.
Speaker 2 (53:31):
Or just laugh our asses off because sometimes they're just
so good. But that means you'd have to turn off
key where it's.
Speaker 1 (53:37):
Eh the clown emoji? The clown You can't even write
that online? Try it dar, all right?
Speaker 2 (53:45):
Thank you so much for listening,
Hosts And Creators
Teddi Mellencamp
Tamra Judge
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