February 19, 2025 • 29 mins
The Bar Mitzvah circuit in LA is quite competitive, and Zoe's A-list friends were there to up the game. She’s recapping her son Ace’s epic night when he became a man and reveals she went so overboard that her husband still doesn’t know the grand total!
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Speaker 1 (00:03):
You are listening to What in the Winkler and iHeartRadio podcast.
Welcome back to another episode of What in the Winkler.
I am so excited because today I'm going to talk
about Ace's bar mitzvah, and so many of you guys
have asked me for details and for pictures, and obviously
(00:26):
I'm so thrilled because i love nothing more than talking
about it. So I'm very excited to just chat with
you guys today. I this is the second time I've
ever done in alone episode, so we'll see how it goes.
But I had my son's bar mitzvah over the weekend,
(00:48):
and uh, he's my first child, So I have three boys.
Ace is thirteen, Jules is nine, and Gus is seven,
and so this was the first bermitzvah in our family,
and I had been planning it for over a year. So, uh,
(01:09):
it's basically a wedding, not for everybody, but definitely for
me and my family. And I think like the most
incredible part about this whole process was that Ace really
wanted to plan it with me. He had like a
lot of ideas and a lot of he had a vision,
(01:31):
and so it was him and I really doing it together,
which I thought was so special. I think I've talked
aout this before, but my husband and I are both
born and raised in Los Angeles. We both have really
big families. My husband's one of five kids. Everyone is married,
everybody has kids, so on his family on his side alone,
(01:52):
like his immediate family when we travel with them, is
twenty six people. And then his mom is actually one
of four kids. His dad is one of three, so
it's a very big family. So and then on my side,
I have two brothers, so there's three of us. We're
all married, we all have kids. So family alone was
(02:14):
like a huge part of this bar mitzvah. But also
because Rob and I are both born and raised here,
we had a lot of our friends, and then my
son had a lot of his friends, so it ended
up being about three hundred people, which is insane. And
I talk about my wedding all the time because I
(02:35):
loved every minute of it. I loved it so much.
It was one of like my favorite core memories of
my life. And to this day, I always on my anniversary,
I say that I miss my wedding. And now I
feel this way about Ace's bar Mitzvah. I planned it
for so long. I worked so hard on it, and
in one night, it's like over one weekend. And so
(02:58):
I had the most incredible party planners. I literally, like,
I cannot say enough about them. I know that some
of you that listen to this podcast know me really
well and some of you don't know me at all.
But I am not the easiest. I am just complicated.
(03:19):
And for me to have no notes for these women
and no like there was nothing that didn't go exactly
the way I had hoped is crazy. They are the
most talented women in the game. The company is called
Harper Sloan Productions, and I actually know Claire Davis, the owner,
(03:40):
because when I was a teacher, I taught her son,
and so I had gotten really close to her and
her family. I had gotten really close to her child, Harper,
and when it came time to plan this event, I
reached out to her and she said to me, like,
I want to do this with you. I want to
(04:00):
work with you, like you were so incredible to my son,
and I want to I wanna I want to plan
this incredible celebration for your son with you. And so
we did, and at the beginning when I was first
looking for a location, I looked everywhere in LA like I,
because I knew it was going to be a lot
(04:21):
of people. I wanted it to be different. I wanted
it to be fun. Obviously it's the most important thing
for the kids, but I really lived like wanted it
to also be amazing for the adults that were coming.
And honestly, three hundred people was like cutting it off,
cutting list off because my husband Rob and I really
(04:41):
wanted it to only be adults that had a real
connection to Ace and like knew him, and so it
wasn't just like people that we know, but people that
really knew our family well and really knew Ace. So
I looked all over Los Angeles and then on the
last stay, Catherine Claire's partner said to me, I went
(05:04):
to this incredible bar Mitzvah at Catch Steak. Ketch is
a it's a restaurant group here in Los Angeles. They
have one in Texas, they have them in New York,
they have one in Miami. I've never been, but it's
like a total like seeny yummy place and there's Catch
La and Catch Steak here in LA. And so she said,
(05:26):
I went to this you know party at Catch Steak,
and I think you should just look at it. And
we went and looked at it and it was definitely
out of my price range, but I was just like
obsessed with it, and I was like, I'll cut things
here and there and I'll just like make it work
at this place. So I booked it a year in advance.
We had like everything planned. In January, they called me
(05:48):
and said that they were closing Catch Steak, but that
I could do it at Catch. They're like main a
flagship restaurant. So I went to go see Catch. They
were so increased of all the people at Catch could
not have been more lovely and wonderful. And I went
(06:09):
in I saw it. I never even went for a tasting.
I was like, this is it. Let's just do it.
And so that was like the first little like maybe
like trip was that, like I had it planned at
this place, the place was closing two months. The place
(06:29):
was closing fourteen days before the party, and I had
to you know, switch locations. Did that. Everything was fine.
Then my mom got really sick, which I've talked about,
and you know, for me, families the most important thing
in the world. And to not have my mom. There
was just like something that I had come to terms
(06:50):
with and was going to It was going to be
what it would be. And you know, if my mom
couldn't be there, my heart would be broken. And I
knew that Ace and my family's hearts would be broken,
but I would we would still, you know, make it
incredibly special for Ace. But it was something that I
(07:10):
had just sort of come to terms with. And then
two weeks before his bar mitzvah, the fires happened in
La ten days actually, I'm sorry, ten days before his
barmitzvah was scheduled to happen, and so many of his
friends and our friends lost their homes, were displaced, family
(07:30):
was displaced, family had lost their homes. It was just
like a really heavy time. And during our evacuation the
first night when we were evacuated and we left, i
A said to me he was really obviously freaking out
about the fires. We all were, and he said to me, like,
(07:50):
what about my bar mitzvah? And I said, look, Ace,
either way it's going to be what it is. We're
either going to have it on the eighteenth and it's
going to be incredible, or we're going to push it
and it's going to be incredible. Either way, we're gonna
get through this. And you know, it's not just the party.
I know that I'm talking a lot about the party.
Ace worked for over He started going to Hebrew school
(08:11):
when he was in fourth grade. You have to learn
an entire new language with an entirely different alphabet. You
read from the Torah, you have to write a speech
about what it is that you're reading about. You have
a half Torah portion, you have all these things. So
it's a lot of work also to have a bar mitzvah.
(08:33):
It's not just the party, which is obviously incredible in heaven,
but it's also a service where you, as the bar
mitzvah about Mitzvah, lead the service and you you know,
read from this scripture, which is the Torah, which is
the most you know, the holiest. I don't know, I
(08:54):
guess book. You know, we have his Jews and it's
a scroll and and so there's there's two really important parts.
And so he'd worked also so hard we'd like basically
focus just solely on the bar Mitzvah. He wasn't able
to play the sports he loved to play because he
(09:14):
would have tutoring and he would have to go to
meet with the canter and all this stuff. So it
was like an incredibly emotional time. And ultimately I said
to Claire and Catherine, if we can move this party,
and you know it doesn't it doesn't affect us financially,
like if we can, if we can just move it,
if it works for the vendors and for the the
(09:39):
temple and for the restaurant, let's do it, because I
don't A said to me, like, I really don't want
to like have this celebration when so many of my
friends are feeling so much pain. And I thought, what
an incredible thing for him to be able to at
you know, thirteen years old, put into words. And so
(10:01):
miraculously we were able to completely just shift the bar
mitzvah a few weeks and do it on February eighth
instead of January eighteenth. The temple was available. Our rabbi,
who is beyond words, who I've known since I was
a teenager. I went to camp at a camp called
hess Kramer, and he was like the rabbinical student there
when I was a camper, and he married Rob and
(10:25):
I because Rob's family and my family both belonged to
the same temple randomly, so my mom like had her
confirmation at this temple, I mean when she was, you know,
a teenager. So he was supposed to go actually on
a sabbatical, and January eighteenth was going to be his
(10:45):
last uh bar Mitzvah service that he was going to do,
and he he even said like, I'll wait till February
eighth and then I'll go on my sabbatical. So it
was just like everything just sort of was was looking
like we were going to be able to switch it
and it was going to be seamless as seamless as
it could be. We were definitely gonna lose some guests
(11:06):
who we love, but we also understood completely. And on
January thirteenth, my mom or January twelfth, actually my mom
went back in the hospital and I was just like,
you know what, let's do this. Let's just switch it.
And so we did, and it ended up being the
(11:30):
best choice for our family because on February eighth, Saturday,
my mom was able to be at aces ber Mitzvah.
She even came to the party for a little bit.
She our whole family was there, and I don't know.
It was just like it was. It was incredibly special.
(12:02):
Ace loves loves loves to ski. On my first date
with Rob, he said to me that skiing was a
very big part of his life and I was like, Okay, well,
I mean it's not a big part of mine, but
we'll see. And so far two out of three of
my kids are obsessed with skiing, Ace especially, And so
we decided to make Kat turn Catch into like a
(12:25):
ski shellet to be like, and we called it Operate Ace.
And so when you first walked in, there was like
all this snow everywhere and a huge neon sign that
said you're an Ace, and like it's so first of all,
I just want to say that I know that this
is insane, Like I know that the fact that there's
merch at these parties for thirteen year olds is mentally ill.
(12:47):
But whatever, we did it, and Ace actually designed them.
There's a brand called Essentials that is just a very
cool brand, and Ace wanted to do like a riff
on that, and so his sweatshirt said Ace Centrals Asentials
established twenty twelve because that's when he was born. And
(13:09):
we had that like the whole area for the merchants
at like Ace's ski shop, and there were ski lifts
and skis everywhere. And one thing that my party planner
did that I thought was just so amazing was there
were framed family pictures of us and all of our
friends all over the venue, which I thought was just
(13:31):
like the most amazing, beautiful little touch. I had soccer
Bit come and they are a Swedish candy brand. They
do like a bunch of gummies, but it has like
no red dye and no bad stuff in it, and
they were delicious. They did the candy. We had an
(13:53):
incredible DJ and dancers. I worked so hard on the montage,
so at bar Mitzvah's there's always like a little video
with pictures of the child from growing up in the family.
I worked so hard on this with this amazing man
named Ari who literally he went through six iterations of
(14:17):
the montage with me until it was like perfect. I think,
he I hope he'll work with me again because I
have two more bermitsupposed to do after this. And I
cried literally from the beginning of the day. I actually
started crying at the rehearsal on Thursday, and then at
the end of the Romtzvah. Rob and I both gave
(14:38):
a speech at the end of the service, and I
hysterically cried during my speech and Rob was like, come on,
come on, you can do it. You can do it.
And literally two seconds into Rob speaking, he started hysterical crying.
So we were both It was just like a really
emotional day and it goes by so quickly. After the ceremony,
(14:58):
I had Courage bagel, which if you're in LA is
the best bagel in Los Angeles, hands down. So we
like hung out, had some bagels. Then we came back.
We rested for a little bit, we went to the
party and it's like this incredible and first of all,
it's so expensive. It's a wedding, so I can't say
(15:21):
the final amount because I don't even think my husband
knows how much because I literally like sold my soul
to get as far it's the done. But I really,
I I don't know. I don't regret one minute of it.
I am so sad it's over, Like I cannot believe,
(15:42):
like I have that like sadness after a party when
it's just like you work so hard on something. And
I had weekly meetings with my party planner, and now
it's done, and like business just goes on as usual
and I only I have three years until I get
to do rules is but to see, I mean, there's
(16:05):
all the extra stuff, which is crazy, and it's you know,
bringing in snow is you know, insane. But at the
end of the day, what it's really about is like
making these incredible special memories for people that you love
so much, your family, your friends, for me and for Rob.
(16:28):
Our friends and our family are so intertwined. All of
my friends know my parents, know his parents, all of
his friends. You know, these are my friends from high school.
These are my friends from elementary school who I get
to raise my kids with. And my son has gone
to the same school since kindergarten, so these are friends
of his that he has been in school with since kindergarten.
(16:52):
And when I was putting together the montage and I
was looking at all these pictures and of all these memories,
and of like how loved my son is and how
loved we are as a family, and how how tough
the last couple months have been for my family, with
my mom being so sick and the chance that she
(17:15):
wasn't going to be able to celebrate this moment with
us or be here with us. It was like everything,
like the emotion just sort of like takes you over.
And really what I felt was gratitude and like so
grateful that I will have this memory for the rest
(17:37):
of my life with all these people that I love,
and that I got to see my son just so
filled with love and supported in a way that like
I feel like all you ever want is for your
kids or for you or for you know, to be seen.
And I felt like this night was so ace and
(18:03):
it was so us as a family. It's funny when
I welcomed when I said my speech, I welcomed everybody
to my bot mitzvah because that's what it felt like.
As had to keep reminding me, Mom, this is my
bar mitzvah, like this is for me, And I was like, no,
I get it, but like really it's for me. But
(18:26):
it was so incredible to have a night where it's
like the world feels so heavy right now in so
many ways for so many different people, and nobody is
any different, Like my situation was my mom. But but
some families lost their homes, some families lost everything that
they own, some family who knows what people are going
(18:48):
through in their lives, like literally you never know. These
are only the things that I even know about. But
it was like one night where everybody just came together
for one for the same goal, which was just to
like have fun and and celebrate. And I just am
so like I can't get over it. I can't get
(19:11):
over the night and and what and what it was like,
and like I just want to look at the pictures
all day long. I had the most incredible photographers, these guys,
John and Joseph, and they were just, you know, so incredible,
and they were always like whenever I turn around, they
(19:32):
were I got to see a few of the pictures
and they were just they caught every moment. And and
now like when I keep going over it, I'm like, wait,
what happened at this time? What happened at this time?
What happened at this time? But I feel like I'll
have these pictures now to remember for the rest of
my life, and I just I don't know, I feel
(19:54):
I feel really I definitely went for it, Like I
definitely was like, we're gonna do it, We're gonna do
it right. The crazy thing was that every single time
my party planner was so incredible, and every single time
I like didn't have a drink, there would be like
another drink. So I definitely had some tequila. But I
(20:17):
I just I don't know. I was able to be
present and to see this incredible experience through the eyes
of my child and for him to be like so
lifted up with so much love and support is all
I could really ask for. Like I don't I don't know.
(20:40):
I mean it was really we had an arcade that
that had like signed that said Ace's Arcade, and then
we had like a claw game that had all of
these different like there was like, uh gift cards or
I had the DJs. There's this thing now where like
(21:00):
if kids dance and they like are really participating, they
at prizes. So I handed out some spider sweatshirts, which
is always a big hit. Shout out to Jen Meyer
and I I I just like, I don't know. There's
like times in your life where you just feel like
(21:22):
the work you put in and and the love that
you give sort of like it's you don't always feel
like it comes back. And I just felt I don't know,
I just felt so grateful and happy and it felt
like the perfect night, Like I don't know, it just
it literally felt like the most incredible night. And I
(21:46):
I'm aware that, like in La bar mitzvah's kind of
become this thing. There's that that movie You're not Invited
to my bar Mitza that I'm saying the movie, I'm
aware that bar Mitzva has become this thing where it's
like everyone's just trying to like, oh, do the next
and it's they become like the status symbol. And that's
not what this was. I'm not gonna say it was
like a simple bar mitzva because it wasn't. It was
(22:07):
over the top, it was fancy, it was all the things.
It was expensive, but it was at its core anchored
in so much love and so much pride and so
much happiness, and it had nothing to do like you
can throw the best party, you could spend hundreds of
thousands of dollars and it could be like you could
(22:28):
feel nothing. You know that it doesn't. And at the
end of the day, what really matters is that is
like the way in which when you go to some
place and you feel like, okay, like this feels cozy
to me, this feels fun to me, This feels. This
feels like I'm I'm getting you know, what I came
(22:50):
here for. And I felt like every single person at
that party felt that way, like, oh my gosh. Also
the horror, like when we were lifting up, they lifted
up me and Raw and Ace and then Jewels and
Gus and they were like when we came home, Gus
that I can't wait for three years because then I
get to go up on that chair again. It's just
(23:12):
like it was just every single person had the best time.
Oh my gosh, I almost forgot. My friend Jamie Gleisher
lives in New York. She is incredibly talented. She makes
these insane beaded bracelets and necklaces and sun like bedazzled
sunglasses and mirrors. And she flew in from New York
(23:32):
and I had her come out and do a bead
bar and it was so insane. I am going to
share pictures on the Instagram. And then I had this
thing called Dragon's Breath, which is like this candy that
you eat and when you blow out, it's like you're
blowing out steam not steam smoke, but it's not smoke.
(23:56):
I don't even know. It was amazing. Basically every single
thing that was at this party was a shared vision
of me and my planners. And I feel like I
cannot say enough good things about every single person that
was involved in that night. Every single waiter at Catch,
(24:18):
every single bartender, every the manager, the security, the oh
my god, the security. There was all this paparazzi outside
in the security. The security was like getting umbrellas to
like shield kids from It was just everybody was just
so incredible and kind and it just felt like the
best night. And I can be the kind of person
(24:41):
sometimes to find like the one thing that wasn't great
and focus on that, because I don't know, sometimes that's
easier than just feeling like full of love and gratitude.
And I can honestly save that today and this whole week.
I just feel like I'm on cloud nine, and that
my mom was able to be there, that my best
friends were able to be there, that my son was
(25:03):
able to have this incredible experience where he could just
be wrapped in so much love and so much support
is just something I'll never forget. And I cannot start, like,
I cannot wait to start working on Jewels's. I have
three years, so I got to really I got to
out do myself, so I wonder. I'm trying to think about,
(25:24):
like where I'll go next, what I'll do next. I
kept teasing Rob, like wait till the musical guest comes out.
Of course I didn't hire a musical guest, but I
was just making him squirm a little bit because he
was so scared at what I did. But even he
was like, it was the perfect party, and I loved it.
And I'm so grateful that you guys were even interested
in this kind of thing in my life, in my
(25:47):
children's lives. I am just you know, I'm grateful. I
realized everyone was a couple parents were saying to me,
like when I would see them at school, like, oh
my god, we can't wait for the Bermutsvah. It's going
to be so epic. The kids are so excited. I
couldn't understand like what they were excited about, Like I
knew that, like it was going to be a great party.
(26:07):
Obviously I'm amazing. But I finally realized when Kim walked
in that the kids were most excited because they know
that Kim is my best friend, and they knew that
Kim Kardashian would be there and that was like the
real that was the real draw. I couldn't understand. I
kept being like Ace, why, Like what do they think
is going to happen at this ber Mitza, Like what
(26:29):
is it going to be? Like? I couldn't understand it.
And then I realized, Oh, this is what it is.
And because she's just the best of the best, she
took pictures with every single kid, like a kid would
look over and shed be like, you want a picture.
I was just like, Oh, this is it, this is
what's happening. But it's a night I will never forget
(26:51):
and I can't wait to show you guys more pictures.
And anybody that voted on the thing saying they didn't
want Bermtsvah content, you should just follow me because I'm
a ber Mitzvah queen now, so you know, I'm going
to do my best to just bring some bar Mitzvah
cheer for the next week and then I promise I'll
stop talking about it. But Ace had the night of
(27:14):
his life and we had the night of our lives,
and I am so thankful that we were able to
pull it off, even with you know, family stuff and
fires and the world being a complete dumpster. I don't know,
(27:37):
it's just like we were able to do it. And
it's funny. My dad actually today sent me he found
my bar Mitzvah book from October ninth, nineteen ninety three,
which I cannot wait to look at. And I remember
at my mitzvah at the end of the night, everybody
(27:57):
jumped in the pool in their clothes and that was
so fun, and it's like a memory that I'm forty
four years old. I remember everything about my bot Mitzvah
until I had my wedding. That was like my favorite
day of my life. So clearly I love to be
the center of attention, and even if it's my child's
you know, moment, I'll somehow make it about me. Just kidding,
(28:19):
I won't. It's all about Ace and I cannot wait
to get all the pictures back from our photographer and
a video from my videographer. And it's a memory and
a night that I'll cherish for the rest of my life.
So thank you guys for listening. And I'm interested to
(28:40):
hear what else you guys want to hear about from me,
so let me know. And if you like listening to
what in the Winkler, Please tell a friend okay bye,
You are listening to What in the Winkler and iHeartRadio podcast.
Welcome back to another episode of What in the Winkler.
I am so excited because today I'm going to talk
about Ace's bar mitzvah, and so many of you guys
have asked me for details and for pictures, and obviously
(00:26):
I'm so thrilled because i love nothing more than talking
about it. So I'm very excited to just chat with
you guys today. I this is the second time I've
ever done in alone episode, so we'll see how it goes.
But I had my son's bar mitzvah over the weekend,
(00:48):
and uh, he's my first child, So I have three boys.
Ace is thirteen, Jules is nine, and Gus is seven,
and so this was the first bermitzvah in our family,
and I had been planning it for over a year. So, uh,
(01:09):
it's basically a wedding, not for everybody, but definitely for
me and my family. And I think like the most
incredible part about this whole process was that Ace really
wanted to plan it with me. He had like a
lot of ideas and a lot of he had a vision,
(01:31):
and so it was him and I really doing it together,
which I thought was so special. I think I've talked
aout this before, but my husband and I are both
born and raised in Los Angeles. We both have really
big families. My husband's one of five kids. Everyone is married,
everybody has kids, so on his family on his side alone,
(01:52):
like his immediate family when we travel with them, is
twenty six people. And then his mom is actually one
of four kids. His dad is one of three, so
it's a very big family. So and then on my side,
I have two brothers, so there's three of us. We're
all married, we all have kids. So family alone was
(02:14):
like a huge part of this bar mitzvah. But also
because Rob and I are both born and raised here,
we had a lot of our friends, and then my
son had a lot of his friends, so it ended
up being about three hundred people, which is insane. And
I talk about my wedding all the time because I
(02:35):
loved every minute of it. I loved it so much.
It was one of like my favorite core memories of
my life. And to this day, I always on my anniversary,
I say that I miss my wedding. And now I
feel this way about Ace's bar Mitzvah. I planned it
for so long. I worked so hard on it, and
in one night, it's like over one weekend. And so
(02:58):
I had the most incredible party planners. I literally, like,
I cannot say enough about them. I know that some
of you that listen to this podcast know me really
well and some of you don't know me at all.
But I am not the easiest. I am just complicated.
(03:19):
And for me to have no notes for these women
and no like there was nothing that didn't go exactly
the way I had hoped is crazy. They are the
most talented women in the game. The company is called
Harper Sloan Productions, and I actually know Claire Davis, the owner,
(03:40):
because when I was a teacher, I taught her son,
and so I had gotten really close to her and
her family. I had gotten really close to her child, Harper,
and when it came time to plan this event, I
reached out to her and she said to me, like,
I want to do this with you. I want to
(04:00):
work with you, like you were so incredible to my son,
and I want to I wanna I want to plan
this incredible celebration for your son with you. And so
we did, and at the beginning when I was first
looking for a location, I looked everywhere in LA like I,
because I knew it was going to be a lot
(04:21):
of people. I wanted it to be different. I wanted
it to be fun. Obviously it's the most important thing
for the kids, but I really lived like wanted it
to also be amazing for the adults that were coming.
And honestly, three hundred people was like cutting it off,
cutting list off because my husband Rob and I really
(04:41):
wanted it to only be adults that had a real
connection to Ace and like knew him, and so it
wasn't just like people that we know, but people that
really knew our family well and really knew Ace. So
I looked all over Los Angeles and then on the
last stay, Catherine Claire's partner said to me, I went
(05:04):
to this incredible bar Mitzvah at Catch Steak. Ketch is
a it's a restaurant group here in Los Angeles. They
have one in Texas, they have them in New York,
they have one in Miami. I've never been, but it's
like a total like seeny yummy place and there's Catch
La and Catch Steak here in LA. And so she said,
(05:26):
I went to this you know party at Catch Steak,
and I think you should just look at it. And
we went and looked at it and it was definitely
out of my price range, but I was just like
obsessed with it, and I was like, I'll cut things
here and there and I'll just like make it work
at this place. So I booked it a year in advance.
We had like everything planned. In January, they called me
(05:48):
and said that they were closing Catch Steak, but that
I could do it at Catch. They're like main a
flagship restaurant. So I went to go see Catch. They
were so increased of all the people at Catch could
not have been more lovely and wonderful. And I went
(06:09):
in I saw it. I never even went for a tasting.
I was like, this is it. Let's just do it.
And so that was like the first little like maybe
like trip was that, like I had it planned at
this place, the place was closing two months. The place
(06:29):
was closing fourteen days before the party, and I had
to you know, switch locations. Did that. Everything was fine.
Then my mom got really sick, which I've talked about,
and you know, for me, families the most important thing
in the world. And to not have my mom. There
was just like something that I had come to terms
(06:50):
with and was going to It was going to be
what it would be. And you know, if my mom
couldn't be there, my heart would be broken. And I
knew that Ace and my family's hearts would be broken,
but I would we would still, you know, make it
incredibly special for Ace. But it was something that I
(07:10):
had just sort of come to terms with. And then
two weeks before his bar mitzvah, the fires happened in
La ten days actually, I'm sorry, ten days before his
barmitzvah was scheduled to happen, and so many of his
friends and our friends lost their homes, were displaced, family
(07:30):
was displaced, family had lost their homes. It was just
like a really heavy time. And during our evacuation the
first night when we were evacuated and we left, i
A said to me he was really obviously freaking out
about the fires. We all were, and he said to me, like,
(07:50):
what about my bar mitzvah? And I said, look, Ace,
either way it's going to be what it is. We're
either going to have it on the eighteenth and it's
going to be incredible, or we're going to push it
and it's going to be incredible. Either way, we're gonna
get through this. And you know, it's not just the party.
I know that I'm talking a lot about the party.
Ace worked for over He started going to Hebrew school
(08:11):
when he was in fourth grade. You have to learn
an entire new language with an entirely different alphabet. You
read from the Torah, you have to write a speech
about what it is that you're reading about. You have
a half Torah portion, you have all these things. So
it's a lot of work also to have a bar mitzvah.
(08:33):
It's not just the party, which is obviously incredible in heaven,
but it's also a service where you, as the bar
mitzvah about Mitzvah, lead the service and you you know,
read from this scripture, which is the Torah, which is
the most you know, the holiest. I don't know, I
(08:54):
guess book. You know, we have his Jews and it's
a scroll and and so there's there's two really important parts.
And so he'd worked also so hard we'd like basically
focus just solely on the bar Mitzvah. He wasn't able
to play the sports he loved to play because he
(09:14):
would have tutoring and he would have to go to
meet with the canter and all this stuff. So it
was like an incredibly emotional time. And ultimately I said
to Claire and Catherine, if we can move this party,
and you know it doesn't it doesn't affect us financially,
like if we can, if we can just move it,
if it works for the vendors and for the the
(09:39):
temple and for the restaurant, let's do it, because I
don't A said to me, like, I really don't want
to like have this celebration when so many of my
friends are feeling so much pain. And I thought, what
an incredible thing for him to be able to at
you know, thirteen years old, put into words. And so
(10:01):
miraculously we were able to completely just shift the bar
mitzvah a few weeks and do it on February eighth
instead of January eighteenth. The temple was available. Our rabbi,
who is beyond words, who I've known since I was
a teenager. I went to camp at a camp called
hess Kramer, and he was like the rabbinical student there
when I was a camper, and he married Rob and
(10:25):
I because Rob's family and my family both belonged to
the same temple randomly, so my mom like had her
confirmation at this temple, I mean when she was, you know,
a teenager. So he was supposed to go actually on
a sabbatical, and January eighteenth was going to be his
(10:45):
last uh bar Mitzvah service that he was going to do,
and he he even said like, I'll wait till February
eighth and then I'll go on my sabbatical. So it
was just like everything just sort of was was looking
like we were going to be able to switch it
and it was going to be seamless as seamless as
it could be. We were definitely gonna lose some guests
(11:06):
who we love, but we also understood completely. And on
January thirteenth, my mom or January twelfth, actually my mom
went back in the hospital and I was just like,
you know what, let's do this. Let's just switch it.
And so we did, and it ended up being the
(11:30):
best choice for our family because on February eighth, Saturday,
my mom was able to be at aces ber Mitzvah.
She even came to the party for a little bit.
She our whole family was there, and I don't know.
It was just like it was. It was incredibly special.
(12:02):
Ace loves loves loves to ski. On my first date
with Rob, he said to me that skiing was a
very big part of his life and I was like, Okay, well,
I mean it's not a big part of mine, but
we'll see. And so far two out of three of
my kids are obsessed with skiing, Ace especially, And so
we decided to make Kat turn Catch into like a
(12:25):
ski shellet to be like, and we called it Operate Ace.
And so when you first walked in, there was like
all this snow everywhere and a huge neon sign that
said you're an Ace, and like it's so first of all,
I just want to say that I know that this
is insane, Like I know that the fact that there's
merch at these parties for thirteen year olds is mentally ill.
(12:47):
But whatever, we did it, and Ace actually designed them.
There's a brand called Essentials that is just a very
cool brand, and Ace wanted to do like a riff
on that, and so his sweatshirt said Ace Centrals Asentials
established twenty twelve because that's when he was born. And
(13:09):
we had that like the whole area for the merchants
at like Ace's ski shop, and there were ski lifts
and skis everywhere. And one thing that my party planner
did that I thought was just so amazing was there
were framed family pictures of us and all of our
friends all over the venue, which I thought was just
(13:31):
like the most amazing, beautiful little touch. I had soccer
Bit come and they are a Swedish candy brand. They
do like a bunch of gummies, but it has like
no red dye and no bad stuff in it, and
they were delicious. They did the candy. We had an
(13:53):
incredible DJ and dancers. I worked so hard on the montage,
so at bar Mitzvah's there's always like a little video
with pictures of the child from growing up in the family.
I worked so hard on this with this amazing man
named Ari who literally he went through six iterations of
(14:17):
the montage with me until it was like perfect. I think,
he I hope he'll work with me again because I
have two more bermitsupposed to do after this. And I
cried literally from the beginning of the day. I actually
started crying at the rehearsal on Thursday, and then at
the end of the Romtzvah. Rob and I both gave
(14:38):
a speech at the end of the service, and I
hysterically cried during my speech and Rob was like, come on,
come on, you can do it. You can do it.
And literally two seconds into Rob speaking, he started hysterical crying.
So we were both It was just like a really
emotional day and it goes by so quickly. After the ceremony,
(14:58):
I had Courage bagel, which if you're in LA is
the best bagel in Los Angeles, hands down. So we
like hung out, had some bagels. Then we came back.
We rested for a little bit, we went to the
party and it's like this incredible and first of all,
it's so expensive. It's a wedding, so I can't say
(15:21):
the final amount because I don't even think my husband
knows how much because I literally like sold my soul
to get as far it's the done. But I really,
I I don't know. I don't regret one minute of it.
I am so sad it's over, Like I cannot believe,
(15:42):
like I have that like sadness after a party when
it's just like you work so hard on something. And
I had weekly meetings with my party planner, and now
it's done, and like business just goes on as usual
and I only I have three years until I get
to do rules is but to see, I mean, there's
(16:05):
all the extra stuff, which is crazy, and it's you know,
bringing in snow is you know, insane. But at the
end of the day, what it's really about is like
making these incredible special memories for people that you love
so much, your family, your friends, for me and for Rob.
(16:28):
Our friends and our family are so intertwined. All of
my friends know my parents, know his parents, all of
his friends. You know, these are my friends from high school.
These are my friends from elementary school who I get
to raise my kids with. And my son has gone
to the same school since kindergarten, so these are friends
of his that he has been in school with since kindergarten.
(16:52):
And when I was putting together the montage and I
was looking at all these pictures and of all these memories,
and of like how loved my son is and how
loved we are as a family, and how how tough
the last couple months have been for my family, with
my mom being so sick and the chance that she
(17:15):
wasn't going to be able to celebrate this moment with
us or be here with us. It was like everything,
like the emotion just sort of like takes you over.
And really what I felt was gratitude and like so
grateful that I will have this memory for the rest
(17:37):
of my life with all these people that I love,
and that I got to see my son just so
filled with love and supported in a way that like
I feel like all you ever want is for your
kids or for you or for you know, to be seen.
And I felt like this night was so ace and
(18:03):
it was so us as a family. It's funny when
I welcomed when I said my speech, I welcomed everybody
to my bot mitzvah because that's what it felt like.
As had to keep reminding me, Mom, this is my
bar mitzvah, like this is for me, And I was like, no,
I get it, but like really it's for me. But
(18:26):
it was so incredible to have a night where it's
like the world feels so heavy right now in so
many ways for so many different people, and nobody is
any different, Like my situation was my mom. But but
some families lost their homes, some families lost everything that
they own, some family who knows what people are going
(18:48):
through in their lives, like literally you never know. These
are only the things that I even know about. But
it was like one night where everybody just came together
for one for the same goal, which was just to
like have fun and and celebrate. And I just am
so like I can't get over it. I can't get
(19:11):
over the night and and what and what it was like,
and like I just want to look at the pictures
all day long. I had the most incredible photographers, these guys,
John and Joseph, and they were just, you know, so incredible,
and they were always like whenever I turn around, they
(19:32):
were I got to see a few of the pictures
and they were just they caught every moment. And and
now like when I keep going over it, I'm like, wait,
what happened at this time? What happened at this time?
What happened at this time? But I feel like I'll
have these pictures now to remember for the rest of
my life, and I just I don't know, I feel
(19:54):
I feel really I definitely went for it, Like I
definitely was like, we're gonna do it, We're gonna do
it right. The crazy thing was that every single time
my party planner was so incredible, and every single time
I like didn't have a drink, there would be like
another drink. So I definitely had some tequila. But I
(20:17):
I just I don't know. I was able to be
present and to see this incredible experience through the eyes
of my child and for him to be like so
lifted up with so much love and support is all
I could really ask for. Like I don't I don't know.
(20:40):
I mean it was really we had an arcade that
that had like signed that said Ace's Arcade, and then
we had like a claw game that had all of
these different like there was like, uh gift cards or
I had the DJs. There's this thing now where like
(21:00):
if kids dance and they like are really participating, they
at prizes. So I handed out some spider sweatshirts, which
is always a big hit. Shout out to Jen Meyer
and I I I just like, I don't know. There's
like times in your life where you just feel like
(21:22):
the work you put in and and the love that
you give sort of like it's you don't always feel
like it comes back. And I just felt I don't know,
I just felt so grateful and happy and it felt
like the perfect night, Like I don't know, it just
it literally felt like the most incredible night. And I
(21:46):
I'm aware that, like in La bar mitzvah's kind of
become this thing. There's that that movie You're not Invited
to my bar Mitza that I'm saying the movie, I'm
aware that bar Mitzva has become this thing where it's
like everyone's just trying to like, oh, do the next
and it's they become like the status symbol. And that's
not what this was. I'm not gonna say it was
like a simple bar mitzva because it wasn't. It was
(22:07):
over the top, it was fancy, it was all the things.
It was expensive, but it was at its core anchored
in so much love and so much pride and so
much happiness, and it had nothing to do like you
can throw the best party, you could spend hundreds of
thousands of dollars and it could be like you could
(22:28):
feel nothing. You know that it doesn't. And at the
end of the day, what really matters is that is
like the way in which when you go to some
place and you feel like, okay, like this feels cozy
to me, this feels fun to me, This feels. This
feels like I'm I'm getting you know, what I came
(22:50):
here for. And I felt like every single person at
that party felt that way, like, oh my gosh. Also
the horror, like when we were lifting up, they lifted
up me and Raw and Ace and then Jewels and
Gus and they were like when we came home, Gus
that I can't wait for three years because then I
get to go up on that chair again. It's just
(23:12):
like it was just every single person had the best time.
Oh my gosh, I almost forgot. My friend Jamie Gleisher
lives in New York. She is incredibly talented. She makes
these insane beaded bracelets and necklaces and sun like bedazzled
sunglasses and mirrors. And she flew in from New York
(23:32):
and I had her come out and do a bead
bar and it was so insane. I am going to
share pictures on the Instagram. And then I had this
thing called Dragon's Breath, which is like this candy that
you eat and when you blow out, it's like you're
blowing out steam not steam smoke, but it's not smoke.
(23:56):
I don't even know. It was amazing. Basically every single
thing that was at this party was a shared vision
of me and my planners. And I feel like I
cannot say enough good things about every single person that
was involved in that night. Every single waiter at Catch,
(24:18):
every single bartender, every the manager, the security, the oh
my god, the security. There was all this paparazzi outside
in the security. The security was like getting umbrellas to
like shield kids from It was just everybody was just
so incredible and kind and it just felt like the
best night. And I can be the kind of person
(24:41):
sometimes to find like the one thing that wasn't great
and focus on that, because I don't know, sometimes that's
easier than just feeling like full of love and gratitude.
And I can honestly save that today and this whole week.
I just feel like I'm on cloud nine, and that
my mom was able to be there, that my best
friends were able to be there, that my son was
(25:03):
able to have this incredible experience where he could just
be wrapped in so much love and so much support
is just something I'll never forget. And I cannot start, like,
I cannot wait to start working on Jewels's. I have
three years, so I got to really I got to
out do myself, so I wonder. I'm trying to think about,
(25:24):
like where I'll go next, what I'll do next. I
kept teasing Rob, like wait till the musical guest comes out.
Of course I didn't hire a musical guest, but I
was just making him squirm a little bit because he
was so scared at what I did. But even he
was like, it was the perfect party, and I loved it.
And I'm so grateful that you guys were even interested
in this kind of thing in my life, in my
(25:47):
children's lives. I am just you know, I'm grateful. I
realized everyone was a couple parents were saying to me,
like when I would see them at school, like, oh
my god, we can't wait for the Bermutsvah. It's going
to be so epic. The kids are so excited. I
couldn't understand like what they were excited about, Like I
knew that, like it was going to be a great party.
(26:07):
Obviously I'm amazing. But I finally realized when Kim walked
in that the kids were most excited because they know
that Kim is my best friend, and they knew that
Kim Kardashian would be there and that was like the
real that was the real draw. I couldn't understand. I
kept being like Ace, why, Like what do they think
is going to happen at this ber Mitza, Like what
(26:29):
is it going to be? Like? I couldn't understand it.
And then I realized, Oh, this is what it is.
And because she's just the best of the best, she
took pictures with every single kid, like a kid would
look over and shed be like, you want a picture.
I was just like, Oh, this is it, this is
what's happening. But it's a night I will never forget
(26:51):
and I can't wait to show you guys more pictures.
And anybody that voted on the thing saying they didn't
want Bermtsvah content, you should just follow me because I'm
a ber Mitzvah queen now, so you know, I'm going
to do my best to just bring some bar Mitzvah
cheer for the next week and then I promise I'll
stop talking about it. But Ace had the night of
(27:14):
his life and we had the night of our lives,
and I am so thankful that we were able to
pull it off, even with you know, family stuff and
fires and the world being a complete dumpster. I don't know,
(27:37):
it's just like we were able to do it. And
it's funny. My dad actually today sent me he found
my bar Mitzvah book from October ninth, nineteen ninety three,
which I cannot wait to look at. And I remember
at my mitzvah at the end of the night, everybody
(27:57):
jumped in the pool in their clothes and that was
so fun, and it's like a memory that I'm forty
four years old. I remember everything about my bot Mitzvah
until I had my wedding. That was like my favorite
day of my life. So clearly I love to be
the center of attention, and even if it's my child's
you know, moment, I'll somehow make it about me. Just kidding,
(28:19):
I won't. It's all about Ace and I cannot wait
to get all the pictures back from our photographer and
a video from my videographer. And it's a memory and
a night that I'll cherish for the rest of my life.
So thank you guys for listening. And I'm interested to
(28:40):
hear what else you guys want to hear about from me,
so let me know. And if you like listening to
what in the Winkler, Please tell a friend okay bye,
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