November 18, 2024 • 45 mins
Jana is hanging out with podcaster Kelly Stafford and things get real when they talk about the difference between the first born… and the other kids!
Kelly’s husband is a famous NFL quarterback and she reveals the truth about being married to a high-profile athlete! And in a vulnerable conversation, we hear about Kelly’s brain tumor diagnosis and how her husband was her biggest supporter.
Plus, what do you get your kids for Christmas when they outgrow toys??
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:01):
Wind Down with Janet Kramer and I'm Heart Radio Podcast.
Speaker 2 (00:07):
Hello, Hi, maybe is not in today? What is she doing?
Speaker 3 (00:12):
I don't know.
Speaker 2 (00:13):
Probably momming, momming, oh, momming. Man, it's just trying to
figure out the rest of the year.
Speaker 1 (00:23):
It's almost Christmas. Way, when do you holiday shop?
Speaker 2 (00:26):
I've kind of started a little bit. I'm a little
disappointed in myself. Usually I'm done with your library and yeah, yeah,
have you started? Nope, I have a list going. But
it's it's one of those things too, where I feel
like my kids are getting out of the toy stuff,
so now I don't know really what to get them.
Like Jay still likes toys. He loves Deadpool, even though
he's never seen Deadpool, so I don't know how that
(00:47):
one works. But I and then the thing now with legos.
They love legos, but they don't actually put them together.
They just want all the pieces. So I just have
like big drawers of like all these Lego pieces and
so and I'm just like, what do you guys want
from Sanna? It gets hard.
Speaker 1 (01:07):
It's like clothes and girls skincare and all the things. Yeah,
I mean, Ramsey basically only still plays with like slime.
Speaker 2 (01:15):
Oh we've never had slime in the house, so, oh wow.
I've actually tried to it. Yeah, but I always give
in no. Yeah, yeah, no slime here. Uh well that's
nice slime. Yeah, I uh. Jolie wants she does want
a drum set? Oh wow, yeah? Have you had one?
A drum set?
Speaker 3 (01:34):
Yeah?
Speaker 1 (01:35):
For some reason, I was thinking y'all had one once
upon a time.
Speaker 2 (01:37):
Nope, no drum set. We'd like like one of those
little babies, right right right, but yeah, yeah, that sounds
awesome for nap time. Yeah. Well, we have like their
little music room as their secret room. Now, okay, so
they have these you know those things I used to
play in school? What are those things? Flute?
Speaker 3 (01:59):
Uh?
Speaker 2 (02:00):
That is only allowed in the secret room.
Speaker 1 (02:01):
That is probably the most annoying thing ever. Yeah, they
have to do them in school. One of the years
I can't even remember in the school, I think it is.
I think so Emmy's already done it and Caden's already
done it. Terrible, it's awful. Yep, like you're doing great.
Speaker 2 (02:18):
Goat were two of them somehow. I don't know why
you appeared in our house, but they're in. I've just
now designated that because that was what they kept playing with,
and I was like, all right, to the music room
you go. You probably can't hear them in their house. No,
I can't hear anything. Oh that's nice, that's drums are
going for Christmas. But yeah, it's just the problem is
is on when we were building. When I was building
(02:38):
the house, the plans, that room looked so much bigger,
and it is truly just a glorified closet. It is
the size. It's a small closet. It is pretty small.
So I'm just like cool. I don't know if you
get like a fool, I mean idea.
Speaker 3 (02:52):
I know.
Speaker 1 (02:53):
I think we're gonna we have to get a truck.
I guess we're going to get a truck for Christmas
for my son. What I mean car, Well, he's turned
sixteen in March. I want him to have it for
a little while to drive it before he gets his license.
Speaker 2 (03:07):
So see the job. Yeah he seasonally he refs, Oh
that's right, Yeah, it's funny. My ex was telling me
a funny story the other day at soccer. He was
saying how the ref is around Cayden's age and was like, hey,
I had a rough night last night. Is anyway we
can make the quarters eight minutes out of ten And
he's like no, the ref asked that, yeah, this is
like the sixteen year old roff. He's like, no, sorry
(03:29):
about your long night. That's hilarious. I was like, yeah, no, kidd. Also,
it's the best money. Well, this is it like thirty
bucks an hour?
Speaker 1 (03:37):
It's thirty plus dollars an hour. Wow, it's amazing. I'm like, kay,
and you will never have a job like this now
sometimes he has to.
Speaker 2 (03:46):
Go an hour layer.
Speaker 1 (03:47):
Yeah, but I mean, like, gosh, and it's only seasonal,
but I mean he has a good bit of money
just from from refing. It's it's and he's great at it.
Speaker 2 (03:55):
What are your rules going to be with driving? I'm
so stressed out about this. Actually, this is very time
because there.
Speaker 1 (04:00):
Have been a number of teenage deaths lately in the
area and one was a car accident, and just it's
it's freaking me out.
Speaker 2 (04:10):
It's really freaking me out. Do they say what that
what happened in the accident?
Speaker 1 (04:15):
I don't know exactly what caused it, but it was
only one died in the In the actual car accident,
it was a teenager driving.
Speaker 2 (04:24):
It's just been a lot.
Speaker 1 (04:25):
But legally, when they turned sixteen, they are only allowed
to have one other person in their car.
Speaker 2 (04:32):
But no one follows that rule. Yeah, no one. I
mean I didn't follow it when I was sixteen. We
didn't have it. Well, we didn't have it. But even
so the car, my Alero, my little Redillero, is super cute.
It fit five people, you know, including me, my mom's
like only you know, the two friends. I mean, I
piled in seven girls in my lero. Yeah, we were leaving.
Speaker 1 (04:53):
I picked them up the other day because our high
school volleyball girls one state, so they let the kids
leave to go watch them in these tournaments. And so
I picked him and like five other boys up and
when we were leaving, I mean, the amount of kids
piled in these cars leaving and that is actually how
they got into this car accident at another school they
were going to this and so I've just had a
(05:14):
lot of conversations with them. I mean, our main rule
is if he is going to a party, he is
not a drinker. But if he is going to a party,
he will not be driving. He will not be riding
with teenagers. Like is it ubering or is it, I'll
be picking him up, so I don't care if I
have to. Now that might change in a couple of years,
(05:34):
I don't know. We'll see how. But as of now,
it's like, I don't care if I have to park
down the street and I have to hide and you
have to tell him that another teenager's picking you up,
Like right, that is just my So like for homecoming,
you know, I was going to let it.
Speaker 2 (05:47):
Too comings By the way, I was really confused because
it was his girlfriend goes to a different school, got it,
So yeah, so I was like I thought they had
had homecoming.
Speaker 1 (05:54):
Yeah, But long story short, I was going to let
the kid pick him up and take him to the
pictures and all that.
Speaker 2 (06:00):
I said.
Speaker 1 (06:00):
But once we get to this point in the night,
he might be a great kid. He may never touch alcohol.
I don't know, but I'll be picking you up from
this point on. So I just have different situational rules.
There's no set he has to tell me specifically or
ask me specifically about a certain kid. And we're just
getting into it.
Speaker 2 (06:19):
Really, do you think he'll be honest with now because
he's a great kid. Yeah, but like, do you think
like what happens if he's not honest, are their consequences
and then do you think they'll be because I mean
you see his phone, so technically like you be able
to like know if he's texting other people and being like, hey, you.
Speaker 1 (06:35):
Know, yeah, well we'll have don't I don't get on
his phone? Oh yeah really No, I did have the
software on his but I don't. I don't get on
his phone anymore. I let him have that privacy. But
we're on Life three sixty and I will pay for
the Life three sixty where you can see when they
get on their phone and all of that.
Speaker 2 (06:51):
You can tell when they get on their phone if
you pay for it, not the free version, but yeah,
you can see how many times they you pick up
your phone when you're driving? Really, and what's that? Is there?
Hard crash all the things? Is there no phone usage
when driving?
Speaker 1 (07:03):
No?
Speaker 2 (07:04):
And so hard?
Speaker 1 (07:05):
Because I've got to admit sometimes I'm I do pick
up my phone when I'm driving.
Speaker 2 (07:09):
I'm like, oh, I've got to be a better example.
Speaker 1 (07:11):
But no, he'll have to check his phone and then
turn it off and then check it when he gets
you know, when he gets back. Yeah, I mean we've
got to get into life.
Speaker 2 (07:21):
What are you most nervous about when it comes to
him driving?
Speaker 1 (07:25):
I mean, obviously just a car accident.
Speaker 2 (07:27):
But but is it is it him? Is it the
other people? Is it.
Speaker 1 (07:33):
Definitely other people? I mean he hasn't driven. I'm not
comfortable enough. Like I couldn't give him a license right now, so.
Speaker 2 (07:38):
He hasn't driven, so he is isn't driven enough?
Speaker 1 (07:40):
Yeah, yeah, he's a pretty good driver, but he has
only been on the interstate one time. We have huge cars,
so it's like also like he's learning in these bigs.
I just need him to get what he's going to
be driving and really get on that. But I worry
more about him writing with other people than.
Speaker 2 (07:54):
I do him driving. So that's what I was going
to say, Is I would I still it's my It's
my lack of trust of other people. Yeah, as because
I'm like I think Kayden was going to be very responsible,
but you don't know really the other I mean even
though you know the front right, but like I also
don't know how Harlow's going to drive. Yeah, when you
know the girls off Highland and razy or whatever like.
Speaker 1 (08:14):
And I think the element of that too is distraction.
And I gave him a very good example the other
day when I was driving and I had him and
his friends in my car and they were all having
a different conversation, and then he was asking me something
and I'm trying to figure out where I'm going, and
I was like, Kayden, this is why I'm like, I
can multitask so well, and y'all, I'm so overwhelmed by
(08:35):
the conversations that are going on.
Speaker 2 (08:36):
It's so distracting. That's what worries me.
Speaker 1 (08:39):
Yeah, because it's not like an intentional thing, but when
you get them all together and they start talking and
they're asking questions and they're talking to the driver, it's
distracting and it's scary.
Speaker 2 (08:48):
Well, that's to your point when you say, like you're
on the phone. That's one of my big things that
I really need to work on when I'm with the
kids on my phone. Yeah, but yet who cares about
me Like I am on my phone. It's not good.
But like you know, when I drive, and I need
to get better at that. But a perfect example I
was telling Alan, I said, it was one of those
really your heart just like jumps out of your chest
because if I was on my phone, there's no way
(09:11):
I wouldn't have had had an collision because the other
guy was on his phone yeah, and it was on
McEwan Yeah, and I had to know where to worve
like to the right where that one opening was, like
that driveway or I would have been screwed, yeah, because
he was coming right at me. Yeah. And it was
like one of those moments where I was like, if
I was down on my phone, I wouldn't have swerved. Yeah.
Speaker 1 (09:30):
And we have a lot of roads like that around here,
a lot of shoulder two lane roads, and that scares
me also. So I'll probably have some rules with again
at night, Like when Emmy starts driving, I won't let
her drive to practice for a couple of years because
it's an hour away. Yeah, So there will just be
certain things.
Speaker 2 (09:49):
What's your rule on ubers for kids? Well, I don't
think they technically can sign up? No, no, I'm sorry to
get in an uber.
Speaker 1 (09:58):
Well, well, tech nically without an adult, they're not supposed
to hear. Different cities you can get a minor. I've
looked this up. In different cities you can get an
uber for a minor. I don't think in Nashville that
you can. I looked it up in another city because
I was going to send kat In an Uber and
I couldn't do it there. Now are they checking? I
don't know, but that would be my thing. I would
(10:20):
give them an Uber account, you know, just in case
he didn't feel comfortable calling me that night or you
know whatever. I mean. I feel like he will, but
I don't know. I don't know if we'll be able
to do it. He did get an ubers in Florida.
He got an uber in Florida a bunch of teenagers,
so I didn't care there, So I think it just
a pair.
Speaker 2 (10:39):
Yeah. I'll be definitely leaning on you for all the things.
Speaker 1 (10:42):
Oh, I mean, it's terrifying. I watch Life three sixty constantly.
You know.
Speaker 2 (10:49):
He'll be fine anyway. Well, and when is that? When
are we looking forward to that? Well? He turned sixteen
in March. Okay, yeah, but the car would be Christmas,
I'm hoping.
Speaker 1 (11:00):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (11:00):
Well, that's cute. Was present? Is it something he wants?
He's got to pick it out. We haven't picked it
out yet. Cute? Yeah, que cute? That only Christmas?
Speaker 3 (11:07):
Dan?
Speaker 2 (11:07):
Well, I don't know why I relate like Christmas time
thanksgiving to my lions, but I really do, because I
just always think of the Lions. And we've got Kelly
Stafford coming on today's show, and she is not only
the wife of Matthew Stafford, who was a former obviously
Lions player, but she has a new podcast out, and
(11:28):
so let's take a break and then get her own.
Speaker 3 (11:44):
Hi. How are you good? How are you?
Speaker 2 (11:47):
Got nice to officially meet in like in person?
Speaker 3 (11:52):
Yeah, yeah, I feel like we've met a bunch before,
but I guess we've never actually.
Speaker 2 (11:59):
Met, you know, and like Instagram world, that's one of
those things where it's like you feel like, you know,
like I feel like I know so many people and
then actually I'm like, oh, we've actually you Actually we've
never really met. We've DMed and stuff, but like we're
not HI.
Speaker 3 (12:12):
I totally get it. We're Instagram friends, which makes sense. Yeah,
it's it's yeah, one of those things.
Speaker 2 (12:17):
But I I have so many questions, But I think
I want to is there anywhere you want to start?
Because for me, we were just we're, you know, both
in our forties. Out are you now, Kelly?
Speaker 3 (12:29):
I'm thirty five. I would love to start with your arms,
my goodness, arms above your head and they're fantastic.
Speaker 2 (12:35):
Let's start there. Wow, But then you don't see the
lower part of this. I've got this big old pillow,
pillow because I'm trying to work on I pulled my
back out. You know, forty and having a third kid
is just super fun, and so I'm like trying to
work on my lumbar support with my fellow.
Speaker 3 (12:51):
Oh goodness, well you are straight?
Speaker 2 (12:54):
Well, thank you?
Speaker 3 (12:55):
You look amazing? Are you? You are you? Like? Where
are we at with the third one?
Speaker 2 (13:01):
Where we are?
Speaker 3 (13:01):
You know?
Speaker 2 (13:02):
It's actually really sad and I don't know why. I'm
kind of like emo today. But where I have that,
I have the want for another one, but my body
will not allow me to have another one. There's no way.
My mind, my body, my insides would be like yeah, girl,
go for it. Like it's everything is saying you are
too No. I don't even say too old, because I
(13:22):
have plenty of people that I know are great that
have kids in their you know loose shoot look at
out forty four?
Speaker 3 (13:29):
Hello, Yeah, go girl? You know what I mean?
Speaker 2 (13:33):
Emma, you know Willis, she had a baby in her
mid forties. I just, for some reason, I feel like
my body's just like slowly shutting down and she's like,
I'm so tired all the time.
Speaker 3 (13:47):
How old are your kids now?
Speaker 2 (13:49):
So I have almost nine, almost six, and then Roman
will be one November thirteenth, so it.
Speaker 3 (13:56):
Would be your fourth, not thirty. It would be your
fourth if you went for another one. But you have
a okay, the one year old got it. Yeah, that
in itself, I feel like it's tough. I mean, you
got three kids and one year old one year old.
I feel like one to the three is like the
hardest ages.
Speaker 1 (14:14):
See I love I agree that you're too busy making
sure they don't kill themselves.
Speaker 2 (14:19):
Yeah, oh my gosh. By the way, the other day Roman,
there we have like rocks on our little pathway. I
turn around for literally one second and he has a
rock in his mouth. And it was one of those
moments where I was like I did this, you know,
because it's like it's a two seconds, it's hard. I
turn around. I'm like, he's got a whole rock in
his mouth.
Speaker 3 (14:35):
I'm like, well, I also feel like when you because
you said your second one is how old six six,
I feel like you've had five years. So sometimes like
when your new moms, you're so on top, very thing.
And then when you have some time and also by
your third one, I feel like you're like, ah, they'll survive,
like that probably poop it through, you know.
Speaker 2 (14:55):
Okay, it's okay, so true because you guys have four
the twins and then yes, and then two more.
Speaker 3 (15:03):
Mine were knocked out pretty quick, which I which was
a really honestly really hard at the beginning. It was
a lot of babies and a lot of throw up
and a lot of crap, and honestly, like after we
had the twins, we I remember looking at Matthew going
what did we do? Like this is really hard. And
(15:26):
then a month later I found out I was pregnant
with my third and I couldn't even tell them because
it was just one of those moments in life where
you are just really trying to survive and you're struggling
to survive, and that goes for like I mean, as
an individual, as a married couple, as a fan, like
in all entities, were just trying to survive, so that
(15:49):
it was really hard at the beginning. But now that
they're they're four, six and two seven year olds, and
I have all girls. They're so good at playing with
each other and entertain each other, entertain each other. So
now I'm like, this is great. Now. I have a
feeling in four to six years I'm gonna be like
this is hell again when they're all in high school
(16:11):
together and Caddie and probably don't like mom and love dad,
you know those scenarios. But yes, four kids, and I'm
treasuring these times right now because it's really nice. Right now.
Speaker 2 (16:24):
Did you do IVF? I did, for thought the things
that you and Matthew were doing with you you're granting it?
Was it IVF for yes?
Speaker 3 (16:33):
Yeah, so we I'm actually a part of Chosen Fertility,
which is based out of Michigan, and it is basically
getting grants for people who can't afford to go because
we all know that IVF is very expensive. Yeah, and
it's hard enough going through it. I went through it,
and I didn't have the financial burdens. I could not
imagine having that on top of everything. And also if
(16:54):
you can't do it, like if you can't afford it
and you have that dream of a family, I just
feel like that would be so hard. So I'm so
happy to be a part of that. But yeah, we're
doing that. We went through IVF for our first two.
They gave us a really low personage chance, and I
kind of knew that going into it when we were trying.
Was it on your side or was it it was
(17:15):
on my side? It was you know, there's always things
that they find when they're looking, but it was it
was mostly me and there was nothing they could really fix.
You know, sometimes they can fix things and make it easier,
but they're in my case, it just wasn't an option.
So we did we uh, we tried for a while.
(17:35):
Didn't work, did IVF, which I'm so grateful we have.
I mean, it's such a blessing. But after that, you know,
I had my twins and we did put two in.
So the twins weren't like a surprise. Just the way
it happened was surprising. We put two in at the
recommendation of my doctor because of what is going on
in my system. He was like, it just gives you
a better chance. One took, and I always say the
(17:58):
one that didn't take was my boy. He was like,
I'm out of here. I know it's about to happen.
I'm not gonna be feeling a boy in the house.
And the one took and then it split, so that's
what made the identical twins, which was awesome. And then
after that, I felt like my body just kind of
kicked into gear knowing how to do it because I
(18:18):
got pregnant very quickly and surprisingly after that. And I'm
so grateful, but it was a very big surprise.
Speaker 2 (18:24):
Did you was there any I mean, you have the
had the four, but was there any piece of you
that were like, all right, let me just try for
that fifth to get a boy, or was me were
just yeah.
Speaker 3 (18:34):
That was the fourth that was our try for a boy.
We didn't find out until she came out. But I
always say because I thought I was gonna be a
mom of all boys. I was a very big tom
boy growing up. I thought it'd be a great boy mom.
Turns out God knows better. Matthew never wanted a boy
because of just he just didn't want his kid to
(18:56):
feel pressured in any type of way or fashion, and honestly,
looking at it, I probably would be the one to
pressure him the most. So I think God knew, like, hey,
I'm just going to give you all girls. There's no
pressure there. Let them be what they want to be.
Type of thing.
Speaker 2 (19:13):
That's so interesting.
Speaker 3 (19:15):
Yeah, So it is, and it's fun.
Speaker 2 (19:16):
I mean, again, I never thought i'd be a girl mom,
but I'm enjoying it very much. So do you enjoy
the girl or the boy aspect? Because she's got two
girls and a boy.
Speaker 1 (19:24):
Well, I always thought I would have all boys too,
not necessarily because I was a tomboy. I just I
just knew I would be a boy mom. Yeah, and
I the boy is easier, I have to say, but
I mean he's he's fifteen. And then I got the
twelve year old girl and just the emotions of an
eight year old girl.
Speaker 2 (19:43):
But the emotions and middle school.
Speaker 1 (19:45):
That's why I was like, oh, it's probably you'll be
great for you.
Speaker 2 (19:49):
I'm not saying it won't, but that many girls.
Speaker 1 (19:52):
I don't that it just gets And I'm super close
to my twelve year old I'm girl. I mean we're
like super super close. I make sure that we have
a really good, real lif relationship. But it's just the
emotions of the girls.
Speaker 2 (20:03):
Are I feel like, when done right though, the relationship
with a mom and a daughter when they're older is
such a beautiful thing. Yeah, when done right.
Speaker 1 (20:13):
Yeah, And that's the thing. I didn't have a great
relationship with my mom. And so it's like this like
struggle because it's the constant wanting to.
Speaker 2 (20:22):
Do it right.
Speaker 1 (20:23):
Yes, but then if I feel like I get it wrong,
then I put so much pressure on myself.
Speaker 2 (20:27):
Literally just happened.
Speaker 1 (20:28):
I didn't do this right, and now we're we're gonna
have a terrible relationship when she's older.
Speaker 2 (20:32):
You know, I literally think that all the time. Yeah,
I got our Jolie again with the hair brushing, and
I'm like, I literally told you every morning, and then
because she was like then late for school and it's
this whole thing. And then when she got on the bus,
I was like, oh my god, she's gonna like she's
gonna hit me because I'm getting on in her her
brushing her hair, and it was it's just like this
whole thing. Yeah, like it, Yeah, it's always there. Being
(20:52):
a Parent's so fun.
Speaker 3 (20:53):
Being a parent, and I feel like it's so hard,
and I honestly feel like a lot of the pressure
comes from what we're seeing on the outside. We see
everyone's world and how good they are at parenting, and
automatically we're like, oh, we should do that, and we
try and it doesn't go that way, and all of
a sudden, we feel like failures. It's something that I
very much struggle with. I mean, I was like, you, guys,
(21:14):
my kids had a MAT test this morning. One's actually sick.
I feel like I'm getting sick. So that's fun. But
when I had a MATT test this morning, and you
know how, you're like, all right, two plus two equals four,
you know, and then you're like, all right, so if
you add one to that, what is equal? And they're
like nineteen, You're like, what the heck? Like, how did
you get there? Well, I'm frustrated, flustered, we're walking out
(21:37):
the door. Therefore, she has zero confidence going into this test,
right cause I'm like, okay, you know what, let's just go.
We're done. You'll be fine. Zero confidence. I left school,
dropped them, turned back around, parked, walked in and grabbed
her and was like, I'm so sorry. I had a
(21:58):
very stress warning you were going to do great. All
you need is to know that you can do it.
But there's those moments as parents where you just lose
it and it's gonna happen a lot. I keep telling myself.
I was like, I can try not to lose it,
but that's actually not that's not going to happen for me.
Like I am a very reactional person, which is horrible
(22:19):
it comes to parenting, but something I'm working on, but
I'm still going to fail. So I just feel like,
as long as you can also show your kids that
you can apologize and be like, you know what I
messed up to something I'm trying to figure out.
Speaker 2 (22:31):
No, for sure, I know that's not gonna say because
when when she got home, I was like, Hejulie, I
just want to say I'm sorry.
Speaker 3 (22:36):
She was it's okay.
Speaker 2 (22:36):
I go, wait, wait, do you know why I'm apologizing?
Oh my god? I was like she didn't even like.
I was like, she didn't even know why I was.
I was like, let me explain to you why I'm
apologizing before you say it's okay. You know, it's a
constant in our house. It's a constant, but so true
though with you what you're saying. But I feel like
even with so Jolie, the same thing, Like when she
(22:57):
was learning her site words you knew, She's like would say,
it's like, let's say it's the the you know, and
she would be like, and we go back to it,
and she'd be like h and I'm like no, like
the you know, and then I would get like you said,
a little frustrated. But now when Jas is doing it,
I'm like, they don't know, you know, so I'm like
I need to just be patient. So I'm like he's
getting a little bit more of the patient side. And
(23:18):
they probably with Roman, i'd be like, yeah, but that's
that's a yeah.
Speaker 1 (23:22):
Oh yeah, that poor first kid. I'm still every day
on him with his I'm like, you were in high school.
And then then the eighte year old, I'm like, that's fine,
you can pay it.
Speaker 3 (23:31):
It doesn't matter, you know what. This is what I
always say. We're gonna succeed in what we succeeded. If
we're not a math genius, we're not going to be
a mat genius does no matter how hard we try.
So maybe we figure it out early and then we
really go towards the things we're good at. I mean,
in this I feel like in this world, they're all
calculated as anyways, I'm going listen.
Speaker 1 (23:47):
Oh you're not going to well, my twelve year old
she can't spell, Like I hate to call her out,
but it gets a thing. She cannot spell, and I
think it's because she had a phone early she would
talk into it, and so she would and so so
literally I was like, are your teachers, I mean, she's
in seventh grade. I'm like, are your teachers not worried
that you legitimately still cannot spell? Because now, actually, a
(24:08):
teacher the other day was like, it's okay, but a
lot of people can't spell. You don't really need to
know how to spell anymore.
Speaker 2 (24:13):
Oh my gosh.
Speaker 3 (24:15):
I was like, well, you know what, I love it.
I love a teacher that leans into that, because most
teachers be like, oh no, we need to send you
to a you know, have you start learning those teachers
I have, but I.
Speaker 1 (24:25):
Think it's it's like the calculator and then everything is
spell checked.
Speaker 2 (24:29):
Now they sure do, but I'm true, Okay, I guess
we'll just roll with this. So switching leaning No, it's
true though, leaning into the older we get. I've been
h after Roman too. I'm like, oh my, there's been
so many symptoms that have kind of come up, and
I've been checking into certain things. I just got a in,
(24:50):
you know, a full body scan, and when I was
kind of looking into your brain tumor diagnosis, you were
saying that you felt lightheaded and dizzy before did you
start to go like down the doctor google rabbit hole,
or were you like, no, I know something's wrong, and
like what was kind of like what kind of person
are you? In that instance, because I go to like,
(25:10):
oh my god, I have MS and I'm dying, or
like you know, or like I have this cancer or yeah,
and I just needed glasses and you know, some supplements.
Speaker 3 (25:18):
You know what. The girls were so young. I think
Hunter was six months or Third was six months, or
maybe like or maybe like three months at this point
that I noticed something was off, but I just felt
too busy or just too too much was going on
for me to really think about it. I mentioned it
to Matthew, I mentioned it to my mom. I was like, gosh,
(25:40):
I'm getting old. Like I'm trying to teach the girls
how to do a front role and I'm like, I
can't find my footing. Afterwards, I'm just and my mom goes,
you're twenty nine, I mean you're getting old. I was like, oh,
I don't know, I just don't feel right. And it took,
honestly about a couple months of me feeling this way
and some thing to actually happened like I was holding
(26:01):
Hunter and I felt myself going down just the room
started spinning, and I kind of threw her to Matthew.
Thank got he caught her, but I went down to
the ground and he looked at me and he was like,
we're going in right now, Like this is getting ridiculous
that you know, you keep telling me you don't feel right.
This is occurring. You know, who's to say it's not
(26:23):
gonna occur when you're driving? And he was right, And
so we went in first the emergency room in Michigan
and they gave me or out of out of hert
something like that, it's the verdigo drug. Didn't touch it.
And so we were actually leaving that next day to
go out of town because it was the off season
(26:44):
and normally when we were in Detroit we had a
long off season, so we would leave pretty quickly and
head to California. And we were doing that the next
day and I was like, you know what, I'll just
get checked another time, Like I'll just figure it out.
We got to California and Matthew ended up scheduling me
the MRI without me even really knowing, and handed me
(27:07):
like the PaperWorks like, E've an MRI tomorrow. It's like, okay.
I was like, but I'm feeling fine. You know, one
of those things that you just kind of like. I
really didn't think there was anything wrong. I just thought
maybe I don't know what I thought, so I did
not go down the rabbit hole. I didn't really look
into it at all. When I went to get my MRI,
they called and said I wasn't on this phone call.
(27:28):
Matthew was and it was his team doctor for the
Lions called and said, you know what, they found something
on the scan. They're going to see you at UCLA tomorrow.
And didn't say anything other than that, and again I
just was like, well, I mean, I had no idea
I was and he said he is, hey, You've an
appointment at UCLA neuro Institute tomorrow, and I was like okay. Honestly,
(27:55):
I just I kind of stopped in my tracks for
a second. But again, when you have young kids, they
kind of take your mind off of everything. And I
don't even remember the next day. We just went in.
They pulled up my MRI and they were like, here's
your brain tumor. And I think I blacked out that
that Oh, it was a horrible. First of all, it
(28:15):
was a horrible way to do it. The bedside man
really wasn't there. I know, Matthew was in a little
bit of shock too. So we sat there and listened
and walked outside, sat in the waiting room behind a
girl who had a scar that now I have, Like
I saw her staples and I lost it. And that's
(28:36):
when he got on the phone and just started calling
every doctor he knew to you know, get me set
up in the best places to figure out what to do.
Which I'm so grateful. He's such an incredible leader on
that field, but he really leads his family in a
way that is even better than that. He really took
the helm of this and just kind of let me
sit back and did everything I needed to get done. So, yeah,
(28:59):
it was. And you know, in those moments, you think,
and you guys would do the same thing. Being moms,
You're like, well, I'm just grateful to me and not
my kids, because you see, you see the kids that
are battling stuff and that don't understand, and to me,
it's truly not fair. And so in that moment, you know,
all I could think was I'm just so grateful. It's
not my kids and it's and it's not my hut
(29:20):
because I think I'm better as like the person going
through it than the caregiver. So I was got it
was a Matthew either. So yeah, it was a moment
in time that I'll never forget. But I'm also extremely
grateful for that whole thing we went through as a family.
Speaker 2 (29:35):
So did they say that there's a chance that something
could grow back like that? Like how how because it's
like some things that they don't get at all, it
could potentially And does that kind of is that in
the back of your mind or.
Speaker 3 (29:47):
Yeah, you know, they they got it all the only
the only thing and I and I'm getting scanned every year.
I'm actually doing the full body thing you were talking about.
I think that's incredible, you know, and going through this,
I just want to be active. But the only thing
that can happen really is, yes, it could grow back,
but the other side it could occur on If it
(30:10):
does occur on this side, it is genetic. And I
begged my parents to get a row because neither of
them can hear like there's you know, but they're just
old and they don't want to do it, So there's that,
but it is if it grows on this side, if
there's some things that you know, or if I start
feeling away and they find out then it's genetic and
(30:32):
I'll have to get my kids tested, which that is
that's the biggest fear of this is just hoping that
that never occurs. So I know that my kids are
okay because I guess that, and the worst thing that
come this is not cancer, so we are so grateful
for that. But if you get it on both sides,
and you know, you remove it because it's affecting your
(30:55):
overall equilibrium, you can lose your hearing in both years
and then all of a sudden and you don't have
your hearing anymore. So that is the fear when it
comes to my kids getting it and stuff like that.
But other than that, it's pretty I feel good. I'm
so happy it's done with and I try not to
think about you know too much, so yeah.
Speaker 2 (31:17):
Well good. It's always like so scary, but like that,
I'm big on. There's something else too that I've been
you know, starting to be a part of all just again,
all preventative stuff, like okay, what can we be doing
to help prevent things. You know, I know it's not
a cure for things, but anything preventative. I'm just like you,
John side Far moving on to the other thing you have,
(31:37):
So is it? There are two podcasts kind of like
one in like two in one because I saw the
timeout than the morning after or the morning after.
Speaker 3 (31:45):
The Timeout is literally thanks to Taylor Swift because she's
gotten a lot of women and football, and the timeout
is literally based is about football. It's usually like the
experience of game day that we went through, and also
just the NFL in general, like the score, stuff like that,
but also learning the game starting from the bottom, trying
(32:09):
to teach and actually, like, as I'm doing this, I'm
realizing how much I don't know. I was talking to
Math the other day and I like looked at him
at one point. So you're telling me you do a
million things before that ball snapped. I'm talking. I can't
even imagine. I go, how do you sleep at night?
Like my brain would be turning at every And that's
what moms do, right, We think about every scenario that
(32:31):
we have to do that we haven't done. Things like that.
He sleeps like a log. But I will say, is
it is a lot tougher than I thought to know
the very much ins and outs. I know the basics,
which helps me watch it. But that's what time Out is.
It's basically like learning the basics so people can enjoy
it more when they're watching it with their sygnegica, ooh,
significant other, sorry and stuff like that. And then The
(32:54):
Morning After is really just a modern podcast about modern relationships, marriages, parenting,
kind of what we were talking about, just being realistic
about all of that. And the reason I started because
I was really tired and really down on myself on
a lot of things as a parent, as a wife,
with my looks, Like I moved to La and there's
(33:16):
god knows all these there's beautiful women in Michigan here,
there's beautiful women here, and I was down on a
lot and I realized, like I am staring into a
screen full of everybody's best and I kind of just
wanted to create a space where we talk about maybe
not all of our best things, but maybe we like
mix it up and talk about some of our failures
(33:37):
so that we don't feel so alone when we do
fail in all these relationships in a way, So.
Speaker 2 (33:43):
Yeah, when you brought that up to matt How was
his or Matthew, how was his response? Like was he like,
I'm so proud of you, Yes, go do it? Or
(34:03):
was there was a little or was there he hesitancy
because the things that you might share well and is
there any awful limits? Because I've seen some headlines, so
I was like, I know there are plenty of things
that I wish I could go back. I mean, there's
a because unfortunately I forget that people listen and then
and then it becomes the headline and then I'm like
why did I say that? Like what for what reason
(34:25):
did I say that? And then it's like you can't
apologize for everything you say, so then you just kind
of kind of keep on going. And I've saw you
lean into it, you like kind of called the tour
chase and the case, you know what I mean. I
was like, she's she's at least leaning into it, So like,
how do you deal with when you see a headline?
Cause I about vomit every time. I'm like, I like so,
but I also you know then I'm like then I
(34:46):
then she gets pissed at me because I'm like, well,
I gotta be really careful what I say I gotta
be my stop, like just talk.
Speaker 3 (34:52):
So tell me I agree with you. I you know,
it's tough because I have to protect him in a
way just because he has a franchise behind him. But
at the same time, I tell myself of these headlines,
they are picking things out and making it sound like
something it's not. That is their job now as media.
(35:13):
We know it's like it's all clickbait. There's no actual
well there is, but like journalism is tougher now because
they have to be the first ones to deliver it.
But you know, some headlines are tougher than others. I
you know the one you're talking about that Honestly, Matthew
and I kind of laughed at that one because it
got so blown up. And if you knew us when
(35:35):
we were seventeen when this was occurring, I think you
would kind of laugh with us. But it is. It's
something that I'm human, Like things affect me, what people
say affects me. I'm not going to sit here and
say I don't give a shit, because I do. But
I also have to remind myself, like if I'm standing
(35:56):
by who I am and if I'm being my real self,
and that's what that podcast is, Like, I am vulnerable,
I am out there. I want to be me because
I feel like for a long time I was just
Matthew's girlfriend or wife, and I had to play this
role and look a certain way and all these things,
and I just I got worn out and I lost myself.
And so with this podcast, I'm kind of finding who
(36:18):
I am again. And I always tell him like, you
know what, if people don't like that, then they don't
have to listen. And headlines are always going to give
you not a good feeling. I don't care if it's
good or bad, because somewhere it just it feels.
Speaker 2 (36:33):
They've never actually put a good one out because they
don't want it. It's not really intended to be like
they want you to click on it. No one would
be like she's so in love, click here, you know exactly, So.
Speaker 3 (36:43):
They're all not fun. I totally agree. So, I mean,
I don't deal with it well by any means, but
I just try to remind myself, like, well that was
the truth. It is what it is. And I could
easily have been like, you know what, yes, we were
the quarterback and cheerleader and we fell in love. It
for site and we were the best couple ever. But
it's just not true. Like we did the ups and
(37:06):
downs through college and we loved and hated each other
and it was it was what we needed to get
to where we are now. So and that's another thing,
like understanding, like where you are now is because of
all these things that it might have happened, and all
these headlines, whether they be good or bad, is it
got you to where you are now as a person?
Speaker 2 (37:26):
And is he like this is is there anything that's
off limits or is he just so supportive of Oh yeah,
because of having your voice, Like like you said, like
you've just been you know, Matthew Stafford's wife, and it's
like no, like you're coming out and you're coming out
into the light and like having a voice and.
Speaker 3 (37:41):
And and I will. He's so proud of me in
that way. He's like he always when he sits in here,
he's on some podcasts. You've gotten really good at this
like this is it seems very natural for you and
I love that. But there are off limit things like
I mentioned something about I don't even know what it was,
but it affected his life. Room that is a huge No,
(38:02):
Like that was like Ooh, I'm going to go get
a hotel room. He's going to be pissed. Kind of situation. Now,
I didn't do that because I have four kids here,
so I can't really do that.
Speaker 2 (38:13):
That would be amazing you and leave them. Yeah, I
like it.
Speaker 3 (38:17):
Actually, what a joyful day. Yeah, I'm gonna go to
the SPA have a great day. No, so that is
off limits. I mean anything that's too personal, I'll never
get into, like our sex life or anything like that.
That's just off limits for me. But other than that,
I mean, he's pretty, he's he likes me showing this
side of myself. He's like, this is the side I
(38:39):
fell in love with, So why wouldn't I want the
world to see this side? So, yes, he is very sportive.
Now headlines are headlined, so you know, every once in
a while he'll be like, oh man.
Speaker 2 (38:48):
Count So I know, I know it's like that. Why
did I say that? Yeah, it's likecause you you felt
that way, I know, or.
Speaker 3 (38:58):
Maybe you couldn't. We could have said it different differently.
Speaker 2 (39:01):
Yeah, that's yeah, that's the hard part in hindsight. Sure
wouldn't that be great if we all said things differently?
Speaker 3 (39:06):
Yeah?
Speaker 2 (39:07):
We just have a mic in front of us.
Speaker 3 (39:09):
Yes, nobody would ever get in fights. Be great, we'd
be so calm and peaceful, but that's just not the way.
Speaker 2 (39:15):
So yeah, well, thank you for coming on and thank
you for accepting my apology. Back in the day when
I said Matthew was the problem, was the reason why
the Lions always lost, and then the next year they
went on to win the Super Bowl.
Speaker 3 (39:27):
For the RAM so I was like, cool, all right,
well heyde and I'm very happy for the Lions. They
are so fun to watch. I mean, it is what
every time I turn on TV and I'm looking at
I'm like god less, and you watch them play and
they're just enjoying it. So I'm so happy, and I'm.
Speaker 2 (39:44):
Sorry about the fans because that's the well that they
you know, And that's like my husband is always he's
telling me things because he was he grew up in
the Premier League of playing and coaching, and those fans
are so mean to even their own like players, you know,
our own people, and I'm just like, I I can't
get over it. But when you even said they're like
when you boo at the kids, and that's that's a
(40:06):
big no. Like you remember that one someone just yelled
at No matter who you're voting for, it, don't yell
at the kids. I saw the something going viral of
the supporter of someone yelling at a child, and I'm like, no, no, like, yeah,
when you're not booing or yelling at kids. And I
do know they were booing and yelling at me, but
when my kids are standing right next to me, they
don't know the difference they're getting, you know, taught like
(40:26):
I mean, it was, But at the same time, there
were plenty of fans there who were so kind. And
that's what I was gonna say. You're like, we only
hear those voices. There are thousands of other people that
are cheering you on. It's like the headlines, you know,
you only you only see the bad ones.
Speaker 3 (40:42):
Well they only appear anyways, but uh yeah, and those
fans like you tend to remember only the bad things.
And that's I don't know why we do that as
humans what we do. So that was that. That sucked.
But again, I like, look back at that and go
there those are. It's such a passionate fan base that
I miss in a lot of ways. So can you
(41:04):
blame them? Not really? I just next time, won't make
the mistake of going on the field, you know, like
that that was my mistake. I won't take my kids
down there like that. If we ever in back of Michigan,
we'll just you know, go quietly to our seats and
sit and watch. But I do I miss Michigan. It's
(41:24):
it's such an amazing town full of great people that
we definitely miss. But I'm happy for y'all. I'm happy
for I'm so happy for that Lion's team, like I hope, well,
I can't say it because we are still playing.
Speaker 2 (41:38):
But you know, I they deserve they deserve their time.
Speaker 3 (41:41):
Yes, absolutely, and I live my lifetime. Yes, if it's
not us, it's I would. I would hope it's y'all.
Speaker 2 (41:47):
So well, Kelly, it was lovely to finally connect and
tell our listeners where they can listen and find you.
Speaker 3 (41:54):
Yeah, you can listen to The Morning After with Kelly
and Hank wherever you get your podcasts. Also with time out.
Time out drops on Tuesdays. In the Morning After drops
on Thursdays, So it's fun. I appreciate you guys having
me on. It was thanks to finally connect.
Speaker 2 (42:08):
Yes, the same love to see you and congrats with everything.
Speaker 3 (42:11):
All right, thanks for all you too.
Speaker 2 (42:13):
Bye bye. Who's your team do you root for?
Speaker 1 (42:17):
Not NFL? I mean Titans, I guess, but no, just
college they're always bad.
Speaker 2 (42:22):
We like the Lions, k they're terrible.
Speaker 1 (42:25):
So there.
Speaker 2 (42:25):
I mean, I would say Titans just because I'm from Tennessee.
Speaker 1 (42:28):
Sure, but like we're just we're just we're just college
football because even growing up, like my parents really just
watched or my dad just really watched U T and
then now born or married into Alabama. Yeah, so you
don't really then watch it, I guess not right now?
Speaker 2 (42:45):
Yeah, I mean I just Alabama doing.
Speaker 1 (42:47):
Vandy beat them, but they bandy also beat Oh god,
there was another really good team they beat this year apparently.
But I don't I get I get bits and pieces
now because I don't. We don't pay attention as much
as we used to because we're so But now Kate
into it too, so like he'll be like in the
car watching it, like I don't know, but I don't
think we're very good.
Speaker 2 (43:06):
Yeah, it's fun. I just I'll never forget that because
I mean, god, I just I went off, So what happened?
So okay, vaguely remember this. Matthew Stafford was on the
lines for I mean, I'm gonna probably like I make
up that it was like six something years. Maybe I
make up that it was at least a long time. Okay,
(43:27):
maybe Eastern Orhannah would lovely google that right now and see.
But forever, and I just kept saying it's Matt like,
it's Matt, like, Matt's the problem. And I don't know
if it was because my high school sweets name is Matthew,
and so I like connected the two Michigan saying this
twelve seasons, there goes a lot. It's probably a long
long time, right, so like so many years, and I'm
(43:48):
just like, he's the problem, Like he is the reason
that we are losing all the time because of the
interceptions or the drop right passes. So if you're gonna
blame like you know, of course you got to just
blame the quarter quarterback. Yeah. Then he they trade golf
for Stafford. And that next year, so that first year
(44:08):
that Stafford goes to the Rams, he wins a Super Bowl.
Oh wow. And I was like, well, wait, so did
you say this out loud?
Speaker 3 (44:16):
Yeah?
Speaker 2 (44:16):
Pretty much? Did you did you say it but like, ho,
now know that you said this because we were like
DM sometimes and I made a public apology on Instagram
like one of my stories, and I was like, yo, sorry,
Stafford's like totally always blamed you guys, but congrats on
your super Bowl.
Speaker 1 (44:35):
When say you said then, yeah, like when you were
being nice, you said you always blamed him.
Speaker 2 (44:42):
I probably did, like over family dinners and stuff too,
you know. So just wanted to well, she seems like
she handled that well yes, no, oh yeah, she's she's
I mean, like, you know, they're always the quarterback. That
would be so hard. It's like the goalie in the hockey.
You're gonna blame Oscar. He was the best. But I'm sorry.
(45:04):
My Michigan is coming out of me right now. But anyways,
love it, I love it. Chat next week. Bye bye
bye h
Wind Down with Janet Kramer and I'm Heart Radio Podcast.
Speaker 2 (00:07):
Hello, Hi, maybe is not in today? What is she doing?
Speaker 3 (00:12):
I don't know.
Speaker 2 (00:13):
Probably momming, momming, oh, momming. Man, it's just trying to
figure out the rest of the year.
Speaker 1 (00:23):
It's almost Christmas. Way, when do you holiday shop?
Speaker 2 (00:26):
I've kind of started a little bit. I'm a little
disappointed in myself. Usually I'm done with your library and yeah, yeah,
have you started? Nope, I have a list going. But
it's it's one of those things too, where I feel
like my kids are getting out of the toy stuff,
so now I don't know really what to get them.
Like Jay still likes toys. He loves Deadpool, even though
he's never seen Deadpool, so I don't know how that
(00:47):
one works. But I and then the thing now with legos.
They love legos, but they don't actually put them together.
They just want all the pieces. So I just have
like big drawers of like all these Lego pieces and
so and I'm just like, what do you guys want
from Sanna? It gets hard.
Speaker 1 (01:07):
It's like clothes and girls skincare and all the things. Yeah,
I mean, Ramsey basically only still plays with like slime.
Speaker 2 (01:15):
Oh we've never had slime in the house, so, oh wow.
I've actually tried to it. Yeah, but I always give
in no. Yeah, yeah, no slime here. Uh well that's
nice slime. Yeah, I uh. Jolie wants she does want
a drum set? Oh wow, yeah? Have you had one?
A drum set?
Speaker 3 (01:34):
Yeah?
Speaker 1 (01:35):
For some reason, I was thinking y'all had one once
upon a time.
Speaker 2 (01:37):
Nope, no drum set. We'd like like one of those
little babies, right right right, but yeah, yeah, that sounds
awesome for nap time. Yeah. Well, we have like their
little music room as their secret room. Now, okay, so
they have these you know those things I used to
play in school? What are those things? Flute?
Speaker 3 (01:59):
Uh?
Speaker 2 (02:00):
That is only allowed in the secret room.
Speaker 1 (02:01):
That is probably the most annoying thing ever. Yeah, they
have to do them in school. One of the years
I can't even remember in the school, I think it is.
I think so Emmy's already done it and Caden's already
done it. Terrible, it's awful. Yep, like you're doing great.
Speaker 2 (02:18):
Goat were two of them somehow. I don't know why
you appeared in our house, but they're in. I've just
now designated that because that was what they kept playing with,
and I was like, all right, to the music room
you go. You probably can't hear them in their house. No,
I can't hear anything. Oh that's nice, that's drums are
going for Christmas. But yeah, it's just the problem is
is on when we were building. When I was building
(02:38):
the house, the plans, that room looked so much bigger,
and it is truly just a glorified closet. It is
the size. It's a small closet. It is pretty small.
So I'm just like cool. I don't know if you
get like a fool, I mean idea.
Speaker 3 (02:52):
I know.
Speaker 1 (02:53):
I think we're gonna we have to get a truck.
I guess we're going to get a truck for Christmas
for my son. What I mean car, Well, he's turned
sixteen in March. I want him to have it for
a little while to drive it before he gets his license.
Speaker 2 (03:07):
So see the job. Yeah he seasonally he refs, Oh
that's right, Yeah, it's funny. My ex was telling me
a funny story the other day at soccer. He was
saying how the ref is around Cayden's age and was like, hey,
I had a rough night last night. Is anyway we
can make the quarters eight minutes out of ten And
he's like no, the ref asked that, yeah, this is
like the sixteen year old roff. He's like, no, sorry
(03:29):
about your long night. That's hilarious. I was like, yeah, no, kidd. Also,
it's the best money. Well, this is it like thirty
bucks an hour?
Speaker 1 (03:37):
It's thirty plus dollars an hour. Wow, it's amazing. I'm like, kay,
and you will never have a job like this now
sometimes he has to.
Speaker 2 (03:46):
Go an hour layer.
Speaker 1 (03:47):
Yeah, but I mean, like, gosh, and it's only seasonal,
but I mean he has a good bit of money
just from from refing. It's it's and he's great at it.
Speaker 2 (03:55):
What are your rules going to be with driving? I'm
so stressed out about this. Actually, this is very time
because there.
Speaker 1 (04:00):
Have been a number of teenage deaths lately in the
area and one was a car accident, and just it's
it's freaking me out.
Speaker 2 (04:10):
It's really freaking me out. Do they say what that
what happened in the accident?
Speaker 1 (04:15):
I don't know exactly what caused it, but it was
only one died in the In the actual car accident,
it was a teenager driving.
Speaker 2 (04:24):
It's just been a lot.
Speaker 1 (04:25):
But legally, when they turned sixteen, they are only allowed
to have one other person in their car.
Speaker 2 (04:32):
But no one follows that rule. Yeah, no one. I
mean I didn't follow it when I was sixteen. We
didn't have it. Well, we didn't have it. But even
so the car, my Alero, my little Redillero, is super cute.
It fit five people, you know, including me, my mom's
like only you know, the two friends. I mean, I
piled in seven girls in my lero. Yeah, we were leaving.
Speaker 1 (04:53):
I picked them up the other day because our high
school volleyball girls one state, so they let the kids
leave to go watch them in these tournaments. And so
I picked him and like five other boys up and
when we were leaving, I mean, the amount of kids
piled in these cars leaving and that is actually how
they got into this car accident at another school they
were going to this and so I've just had a
(05:14):
lot of conversations with them. I mean, our main rule
is if he is going to a party, he is
not a drinker. But if he is going to a party,
he will not be driving. He will not be riding
with teenagers. Like is it ubering or is it, I'll
be picking him up, so I don't care if I
have to. Now that might change in a couple of years,
(05:34):
I don't know. We'll see how. But as of now,
it's like, I don't care if I have to park
down the street and I have to hide and you
have to tell him that another teenager's picking you up,
Like right, that is just my So like for homecoming,
you know, I was going to let it.
Speaker 2 (05:47):
Too comings By the way, I was really confused because
it was his girlfriend goes to a different school, got it,
So yeah, so I was like I thought they had
had homecoming.
Speaker 1 (05:54):
Yeah, But long story short, I was going to let
the kid pick him up and take him to the
pictures and all that.
Speaker 2 (06:00):
I said.
Speaker 1 (06:00):
But once we get to this point in the night,
he might be a great kid. He may never touch alcohol.
I don't know, but I'll be picking you up from
this point on. So I just have different situational rules.
There's no set he has to tell me specifically or
ask me specifically about a certain kid. And we're just
getting into it.
Speaker 2 (06:19):
Really, do you think he'll be honest with now because
he's a great kid. Yeah, but like, do you think
like what happens if he's not honest, are their consequences
and then do you think they'll be because I mean
you see his phone, so technically like you be able
to like know if he's texting other people and being like, hey, you.
Speaker 1 (06:35):
Know, yeah, well we'll have don't I don't get on
his phone? Oh yeah really No, I did have the
software on his but I don't. I don't get on
his phone anymore. I let him have that privacy. But
we're on Life three sixty and I will pay for
the Life three sixty where you can see when they
get on their phone and all of that.
Speaker 2 (06:51):
You can tell when they get on their phone if
you pay for it, not the free version, but yeah,
you can see how many times they you pick up
your phone when you're driving? Really, and what's that? Is there?
Hard crash all the things? Is there no phone usage
when driving?
Speaker 1 (07:03):
No?
Speaker 2 (07:04):
And so hard?
Speaker 1 (07:05):
Because I've got to admit sometimes I'm I do pick
up my phone when I'm driving.
Speaker 2 (07:09):
I'm like, oh, I've got to be a better example.
Speaker 1 (07:11):
But no, he'll have to check his phone and then
turn it off and then check it when he gets
you know, when he gets back. Yeah, I mean we've
got to get into life.
Speaker 2 (07:21):
What are you most nervous about when it comes to
him driving?
Speaker 1 (07:25):
I mean, obviously just a car accident.
Speaker 2 (07:27):
But but is it is it him? Is it the
other people? Is it.
Speaker 1 (07:33):
Definitely other people? I mean he hasn't driven. I'm not
comfortable enough. Like I couldn't give him a license right now, so.
Speaker 2 (07:38):
He hasn't driven, so he is isn't driven enough?
Speaker 1 (07:40):
Yeah, yeah, he's a pretty good driver, but he has
only been on the interstate one time. We have huge cars,
so it's like also like he's learning in these bigs.
I just need him to get what he's going to
be driving and really get on that. But I worry
more about him writing with other people than.
Speaker 2 (07:54):
I do him driving. So that's what I was going
to say, Is I would I still it's my It's
my lack of trust of other people. Yeah, as because
I'm like I think Kayden was going to be very responsible,
but you don't know really the other I mean even
though you know the front right, but like I also
don't know how Harlow's going to drive. Yeah, when you
know the girls off Highland and razy or whatever like.
Speaker 1 (08:14):
And I think the element of that too is distraction.
And I gave him a very good example the other
day when I was driving and I had him and
his friends in my car and they were all having
a different conversation, and then he was asking me something
and I'm trying to figure out where I'm going, and
I was like, Kayden, this is why I'm like, I
can multitask so well, and y'all, I'm so overwhelmed by
(08:35):
the conversations that are going on.
Speaker 2 (08:36):
It's so distracting. That's what worries me.
Speaker 1 (08:39):
Yeah, because it's not like an intentional thing, but when
you get them all together and they start talking and
they're asking questions and they're talking to the driver, it's
distracting and it's scary.
Speaker 2 (08:48):
Well, that's to your point when you say, like you're
on the phone. That's one of my big things that
I really need to work on when I'm with the
kids on my phone. Yeah, but yet who cares about
me Like I am on my phone. It's not good.
But like you know, when I drive, and I need
to get better at that. But a perfect example I
was telling Alan, I said, it was one of those
really your heart just like jumps out of your chest
because if I was on my phone, there's no way
(09:11):
I wouldn't have had had an collision because the other
guy was on his phone yeah, and it was on
McEwan Yeah, and I had to know where to worve
like to the right where that one opening was, like
that driveway or I would have been screwed, yeah, because
he was coming right at me. Yeah. And it was
like one of those moments where I was like, if
I was down on my phone, I wouldn't have swerved. Yeah.
Speaker 1 (09:30):
And we have a lot of roads like that around here,
a lot of shoulder two lane roads, and that scares
me also. So I'll probably have some rules with again
at night, Like when Emmy starts driving, I won't let
her drive to practice for a couple of years because
it's an hour away. Yeah, So there will just be
certain things.
Speaker 2 (09:49):
What's your rule on ubers for kids? Well, I don't
think they technically can sign up? No, no, I'm sorry to
get in an uber.
Speaker 1 (09:58):
Well, well, tech nically without an adult, they're not supposed
to hear. Different cities you can get a minor. I've
looked this up. In different cities you can get an
uber for a minor. I don't think in Nashville that
you can. I looked it up in another city because
I was going to send kat In an Uber and
I couldn't do it there. Now are they checking? I
don't know, but that would be my thing. I would
(10:20):
give them an Uber account, you know, just in case
he didn't feel comfortable calling me that night or you
know whatever. I mean. I feel like he will, but
I don't know. I don't know if we'll be able
to do it. He did get an ubers in Florida.
He got an uber in Florida a bunch of teenagers,
so I didn't care there, So I think it just
a pair.
Speaker 2 (10:39):
Yeah. I'll be definitely leaning on you for all the things.
Speaker 1 (10:42):
Oh, I mean, it's terrifying. I watch Life three sixty constantly.
You know.
Speaker 2 (10:49):
He'll be fine anyway. Well, and when is that? When
are we looking forward to that? Well? He turned sixteen
in March. Okay, yeah, but the car would be Christmas,
I'm hoping.
Speaker 1 (11:00):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (11:00):
Well, that's cute. Was present? Is it something he wants?
He's got to pick it out. We haven't picked it
out yet. Cute? Yeah, que cute? That only Christmas?
Speaker 3 (11:07):
Dan?
Speaker 2 (11:07):
Well, I don't know why I relate like Christmas time
thanksgiving to my lions, but I really do, because I
just always think of the Lions. And we've got Kelly
Stafford coming on today's show, and she is not only
the wife of Matthew Stafford, who was a former obviously
Lions player, but she has a new podcast out, and
(11:28):
so let's take a break and then get her own.
Speaker 3 (11:44):
Hi. How are you good? How are you?
Speaker 2 (11:47):
Got nice to officially meet in like in person?
Speaker 3 (11:52):
Yeah, yeah, I feel like we've met a bunch before,
but I guess we've never actually.
Speaker 2 (11:59):
Met, you know, and like Instagram world, that's one of
those things where it's like you feel like, you know,
like I feel like I know so many people and
then actually I'm like, oh, we've actually you Actually we've
never really met. We've DMed and stuff, but like we're
not HI.
Speaker 3 (12:12):
I totally get it. We're Instagram friends, which makes sense. Yeah,
it's it's yeah, one of those things.
Speaker 2 (12:17):
But I I have so many questions, But I think
I want to is there anywhere you want to start?
Because for me, we were just we're, you know, both
in our forties. Out are you now, Kelly?
Speaker 3 (12:29):
I'm thirty five. I would love to start with your arms,
my goodness, arms above your head and they're fantastic.
Speaker 2 (12:35):
Let's start there. Wow, But then you don't see the
lower part of this. I've got this big old pillow,
pillow because I'm trying to work on I pulled my
back out. You know, forty and having a third kid
is just super fun, and so I'm like trying to
work on my lumbar support with my fellow.
Speaker 3 (12:51):
Oh goodness, well you are straight?
Speaker 2 (12:54):
Well, thank you?
Speaker 3 (12:55):
You look amazing? Are you? You are you? Like? Where
are we at with the third one?
Speaker 2 (13:01):
Where we are?
Speaker 3 (13:01):
You know?
Speaker 2 (13:02):
It's actually really sad and I don't know why. I'm
kind of like emo today. But where I have that,
I have the want for another one, but my body
will not allow me to have another one. There's no way.
My mind, my body, my insides would be like yeah, girl,
go for it. Like it's everything is saying you are
too No. I don't even say too old, because I
(13:22):
have plenty of people that I know are great that
have kids in their you know loose shoot look at
out forty four?
Speaker 3 (13:29):
Hello, Yeah, go girl? You know what I mean?
Speaker 2 (13:33):
Emma, you know Willis, she had a baby in her
mid forties. I just, for some reason, I feel like
my body's just like slowly shutting down and she's like,
I'm so tired all the time.
Speaker 3 (13:47):
How old are your kids now?
Speaker 2 (13:49):
So I have almost nine, almost six, and then Roman
will be one November thirteenth, so it.
Speaker 3 (13:56):
Would be your fourth, not thirty. It would be your
fourth if you went for another one. But you have
a okay, the one year old got it. Yeah, that
in itself, I feel like it's tough. I mean, you
got three kids and one year old one year old.
I feel like one to the three is like the
hardest ages.
Speaker 1 (14:14):
See I love I agree that you're too busy making
sure they don't kill themselves.
Speaker 2 (14:19):
Yeah, oh my gosh. By the way, the other day Roman,
there we have like rocks on our little pathway. I
turn around for literally one second and he has a
rock in his mouth. And it was one of those
moments where I was like I did this, you know,
because it's like it's a two seconds, it's hard. I
turn around. I'm like, he's got a whole rock in
his mouth.
Speaker 3 (14:35):
I'm like, well, I also feel like when you because
you said your second one is how old six six,
I feel like you've had five years. So sometimes like
when your new moms, you're so on top, very thing.
And then when you have some time and also by
your third one, I feel like you're like, ah, they'll survive,
like that probably poop it through, you know.
Speaker 2 (14:55):
Okay, it's okay, so true because you guys have four
the twins and then yes, and then two more.
Speaker 3 (15:03):
Mine were knocked out pretty quick, which I which was
a really honestly really hard at the beginning. It was
a lot of babies and a lot of throw up
and a lot of crap, and honestly, like after we
had the twins, we I remember looking at Matthew going
what did we do? Like this is really hard. And
(15:26):
then a month later I found out I was pregnant
with my third and I couldn't even tell them because
it was just one of those moments in life where
you are just really trying to survive and you're struggling
to survive, and that goes for like I mean, as
an individual, as a married couple, as a fan, like
in all entities, were just trying to survive, so that
(15:49):
it was really hard at the beginning. But now that
they're they're four, six and two seven year olds, and
I have all girls. They're so good at playing with
each other and entertain each other, entertain each other. So
now I'm like, this is great. Now. I have a
feeling in four to six years I'm gonna be like
this is hell again when they're all in high school
(16:11):
together and Caddie and probably don't like mom and love dad,
you know those scenarios. But yes, four kids, and I'm
treasuring these times right now because it's really nice. Right now.
Speaker 2 (16:24):
Did you do IVF? I did, for thought the things
that you and Matthew were doing with you you're granting it?
Was it IVF for yes?
Speaker 3 (16:33):
Yeah, so we I'm actually a part of Chosen Fertility,
which is based out of Michigan, and it is basically
getting grants for people who can't afford to go because
we all know that IVF is very expensive. Yeah, and
it's hard enough going through it. I went through it,
and I didn't have the financial burdens. I could not
imagine having that on top of everything. And also if
(16:54):
you can't do it, like if you can't afford it
and you have that dream of a family, I just
feel like that would be so hard. So I'm so
happy to be a part of that. But yeah, we're
doing that. We went through IVF for our first two.
They gave us a really low personage chance, and I
kind of knew that going into it when we were trying.
Was it on your side or was it it was
(17:15):
on my side? It was you know, there's always things
that they find when they're looking, but it was it
was mostly me and there was nothing they could really fix.
You know, sometimes they can fix things and make it easier,
but they're in my case, it just wasn't an option.
So we did we uh, we tried for a while.
(17:35):
Didn't work, did IVF, which I'm so grateful we have.
I mean, it's such a blessing. But after that, you know,
I had my twins and we did put two in.
So the twins weren't like a surprise. Just the way
it happened was surprising. We put two in at the
recommendation of my doctor because of what is going on
in my system. He was like, it just gives you
a better chance. One took, and I always say the
(17:58):
one that didn't take was my boy. He was like,
I'm out of here. I know it's about to happen.
I'm not gonna be feeling a boy in the house.
And the one took and then it split, so that's
what made the identical twins, which was awesome. And then
after that, I felt like my body just kind of
kicked into gear knowing how to do it because I
(18:18):
got pregnant very quickly and surprisingly after that. And I'm
so grateful, but it was a very big surprise.
Speaker 2 (18:24):
Did you was there any I mean, you have the
had the four, but was there any piece of you
that were like, all right, let me just try for
that fifth to get a boy, or was me were
just yeah.
Speaker 3 (18:34):
That was the fourth that was our try for a boy.
We didn't find out until she came out. But I
always say because I thought I was gonna be a
mom of all boys. I was a very big tom
boy growing up. I thought it'd be a great boy mom.
Turns out God knows better. Matthew never wanted a boy
because of just he just didn't want his kid to
(18:56):
feel pressured in any type of way or fashion, and honestly,
looking at it, I probably would be the one to
pressure him the most. So I think God knew, like, hey,
I'm just going to give you all girls. There's no
pressure there. Let them be what they want to be.
Type of thing.
Speaker 2 (19:13):
That's so interesting.
Speaker 3 (19:15):
Yeah, So it is, and it's fun.
Speaker 2 (19:16):
I mean, again, I never thought i'd be a girl mom,
but I'm enjoying it very much. So do you enjoy
the girl or the boy aspect? Because she's got two
girls and a boy.
Speaker 1 (19:24):
Well, I always thought I would have all boys too,
not necessarily because I was a tomboy. I just I
just knew I would be a boy mom. Yeah, and
I the boy is easier, I have to say, but
I mean he's he's fifteen. And then I got the
twelve year old girl and just the emotions of an
eight year old girl.
Speaker 2 (19:43):
But the emotions and middle school.
Speaker 1 (19:45):
That's why I was like, oh, it's probably you'll be
great for you.
Speaker 2 (19:49):
I'm not saying it won't, but that many girls.
Speaker 1 (19:52):
I don't that it just gets And I'm super close
to my twelve year old I'm girl. I mean we're
like super super close. I make sure that we have
a really good, real lif relationship. But it's just the
emotions of the girls.
Speaker 2 (20:03):
Are I feel like, when done right though, the relationship
with a mom and a daughter when they're older is
such a beautiful thing. Yeah, when done right.
Speaker 1 (20:13):
Yeah, And that's the thing. I didn't have a great
relationship with my mom. And so it's like this like
struggle because it's the constant wanting to.
Speaker 2 (20:22):
Do it right.
Speaker 1 (20:23):
Yes, but then if I feel like I get it wrong,
then I put so much pressure on myself.
Speaker 2 (20:27):
Literally just happened.
Speaker 1 (20:28):
I didn't do this right, and now we're we're gonna
have a terrible relationship when she's older.
Speaker 2 (20:32):
You know, I literally think that all the time. Yeah,
I got our Jolie again with the hair brushing, and
I'm like, I literally told you every morning, and then
because she was like then late for school and it's
this whole thing. And then when she got on the bus,
I was like, oh my god, she's gonna like she's
gonna hit me because I'm getting on in her her
brushing her hair, and it was it's just like this
whole thing. Yeah, like it, Yeah, it's always there. Being
(20:52):
a Parent's so fun.
Speaker 3 (20:53):
Being a parent, and I feel like it's so hard,
and I honestly feel like a lot of the pressure
comes from what we're seeing on the outside. We see
everyone's world and how good they are at parenting, and
automatically we're like, oh, we should do that, and we
try and it doesn't go that way, and all of
a sudden, we feel like failures. It's something that I
very much struggle with. I mean, I was like, you, guys,
(21:14):
my kids had a MAT test this morning. One's actually sick.
I feel like I'm getting sick. So that's fun. But
when I had a MATT test this morning, and you
know how, you're like, all right, two plus two equals four,
you know, and then you're like, all right, so if
you add one to that, what is equal? And they're
like nineteen, You're like, what the heck? Like, how did
you get there? Well, I'm frustrated, flustered, we're walking out
(21:37):
the door. Therefore, she has zero confidence going into this test,
right cause I'm like, okay, you know what, let's just go.
We're done. You'll be fine. Zero confidence. I left school,
dropped them, turned back around, parked, walked in and grabbed
her and was like, I'm so sorry. I had a
(21:58):
very stress warning you were going to do great. All
you need is to know that you can do it.
But there's those moments as parents where you just lose
it and it's gonna happen a lot. I keep telling myself.
I was like, I can try not to lose it,
but that's actually not that's not going to happen for me.
Like I am a very reactional person, which is horrible
(22:19):
it comes to parenting, but something I'm working on, but
I'm still going to fail. So I just feel like,
as long as you can also show your kids that
you can apologize and be like, you know what I
messed up to something I'm trying to figure out.
Speaker 2 (22:31):
No, for sure, I know that's not gonna say because
when when she got home, I was like, Hejulie, I
just want to say I'm sorry.
Speaker 3 (22:36):
She was it's okay.
Speaker 2 (22:36):
I go, wait, wait, do you know why I'm apologizing?
Oh my god? I was like she didn't even like.
I was like, she didn't even know why I was.
I was like, let me explain to you why I'm
apologizing before you say it's okay. You know, it's a
constant in our house. It's a constant, but so true
though with you what you're saying. But I feel like
even with so Jolie, the same thing, Like when she
(22:57):
was learning her site words you knew, She's like would say,
it's like, let's say it's the the you know, and
she would be like, and we go back to it,
and she'd be like h and I'm like no, like
the you know, and then I would get like you said,
a little frustrated. But now when Jas is doing it,
I'm like, they don't know, you know, so I'm like
I need to just be patient. So I'm like he's
getting a little bit more of the patient side. And
(23:18):
they probably with Roman, i'd be like, yeah, but that's
that's a yeah.
Speaker 1 (23:22):
Oh yeah, that poor first kid. I'm still every day
on him with his I'm like, you were in high school.
And then then the eighte year old, I'm like, that's fine,
you can pay it.
Speaker 3 (23:31):
It doesn't matter, you know what. This is what I
always say. We're gonna succeed in what we succeeded. If
we're not a math genius, we're not going to be
a mat genius does no matter how hard we try.
So maybe we figure it out early and then we
really go towards the things we're good at. I mean,
in this I feel like in this world, they're all
calculated as anyways, I'm going listen.
Speaker 1 (23:47):
Oh you're not going to well, my twelve year old
she can't spell, Like I hate to call her out,
but it gets a thing. She cannot spell, and I
think it's because she had a phone early she would
talk into it, and so she would and so so
literally I was like, are your teachers, I mean, she's
in seventh grade. I'm like, are your teachers not worried
that you legitimately still cannot spell? Because now, actually, a
(24:08):
teacher the other day was like, it's okay, but a
lot of people can't spell. You don't really need to
know how to spell anymore.
Speaker 2 (24:13):
Oh my gosh.
Speaker 3 (24:15):
I was like, well, you know what, I love it.
I love a teacher that leans into that, because most
teachers be like, oh no, we need to send you
to a you know, have you start learning those teachers
I have, but I.
Speaker 1 (24:25):
Think it's it's like the calculator and then everything is
spell checked.
Speaker 2 (24:29):
Now they sure do, but I'm true, Okay, I guess
we'll just roll with this. So switching leaning No, it's
true though, leaning into the older we get. I've been
h after Roman too. I'm like, oh my, there's been
so many symptoms that have kind of come up, and
I've been checking into certain things. I just got a in,
(24:50):
you know, a full body scan, and when I was
kind of looking into your brain tumor diagnosis, you were
saying that you felt lightheaded and dizzy before did you
start to go like down the doctor google rabbit hole,
or were you like, no, I know something's wrong, and
like what was kind of like what kind of person
are you? In that instance, because I go to like,
(25:10):
oh my god, I have MS and I'm dying, or
like you know, or like I have this cancer or yeah,
and I just needed glasses and you know, some supplements.
Speaker 3 (25:18):
You know what. The girls were so young. I think
Hunter was six months or Third was six months, or
maybe like or maybe like three months at this point
that I noticed something was off, but I just felt
too busy or just too too much was going on
for me to really think about it. I mentioned it
to Matthew, I mentioned it to my mom. I was like, gosh,
(25:40):
I'm getting old. Like I'm trying to teach the girls
how to do a front role and I'm like, I
can't find my footing. Afterwards, I'm just and my mom goes,
you're twenty nine, I mean you're getting old. I was like, oh,
I don't know, I just don't feel right. And it took,
honestly about a couple months of me feeling this way
and some thing to actually happened like I was holding
(26:01):
Hunter and I felt myself going down just the room
started spinning, and I kind of threw her to Matthew.
Thank got he caught her, but I went down to
the ground and he looked at me and he was like,
we're going in right now, Like this is getting ridiculous
that you know, you keep telling me you don't feel right.
This is occurring. You know, who's to say it's not
(26:23):
gonna occur when you're driving? And he was right, And
so we went in first the emergency room in Michigan
and they gave me or out of out of hert
something like that, it's the verdigo drug. Didn't touch it.
And so we were actually leaving that next day to
go out of town because it was the off season
(26:44):
and normally when we were in Detroit we had a
long off season, so we would leave pretty quickly and
head to California. And we were doing that the next
day and I was like, you know what, I'll just
get checked another time, Like I'll just figure it out.
We got to California and Matthew ended up scheduling me
the MRI without me even really knowing, and handed me
(27:07):
like the PaperWorks like, E've an MRI tomorrow. It's like, okay.
I was like, but I'm feeling fine. You know, one
of those things that you just kind of like. I
really didn't think there was anything wrong. I just thought
maybe I don't know what I thought, so I did
not go down the rabbit hole. I didn't really look
into it at all. When I went to get my MRI,
they called and said I wasn't on this phone call.
(27:28):
Matthew was and it was his team doctor for the
Lions called and said, you know what, they found something
on the scan. They're going to see you at UCLA tomorrow.
And didn't say anything other than that, and again I
just was like, well, I mean, I had no idea
I was and he said he is, hey, You've an
appointment at UCLA neuro Institute tomorrow, and I was like okay. Honestly,
(27:55):
I just I kind of stopped in my tracks for
a second. But again, when you have young kids, they
kind of take your mind off of everything. And I
don't even remember the next day. We just went in.
They pulled up my MRI and they were like, here's
your brain tumor. And I think I blacked out that
that Oh, it was a horrible. First of all, it
(28:15):
was a horrible way to do it. The bedside man
really wasn't there. I know, Matthew was in a little
bit of shock too. So we sat there and listened
and walked outside, sat in the waiting room behind a
girl who had a scar that now I have, Like
I saw her staples and I lost it. And that's
(28:36):
when he got on the phone and just started calling
every doctor he knew to you know, get me set
up in the best places to figure out what to do.
Which I'm so grateful. He's such an incredible leader on
that field, but he really leads his family in a
way that is even better than that. He really took
the helm of this and just kind of let me
sit back and did everything I needed to get done. So, yeah,
(28:59):
it was. And you know, in those moments, you think,
and you guys would do the same thing. Being moms,
You're like, well, I'm just grateful to me and not
my kids, because you see, you see the kids that
are battling stuff and that don't understand, and to me,
it's truly not fair. And so in that moment, you know,
all I could think was I'm just so grateful. It's
not my kids and it's and it's not my hut
(29:20):
because I think I'm better as like the person going
through it than the caregiver. So I was got it
was a Matthew either. So yeah, it was a moment
in time that I'll never forget. But I'm also extremely
grateful for that whole thing we went through as a family.
Speaker 2 (29:35):
So did they say that there's a chance that something
could grow back like that? Like how how because it's
like some things that they don't get at all, it
could potentially And does that kind of is that in
the back of your mind or.
Speaker 3 (29:47):
Yeah, you know, they they got it all the only
the only thing and I and I'm getting scanned every year.
I'm actually doing the full body thing you were talking about.
I think that's incredible, you know, and going through this,
I just want to be active. But the only thing
that can happen really is, yes, it could grow back,
but the other side it could occur on If it
(30:10):
does occur on this side, it is genetic. And I
begged my parents to get a row because neither of
them can hear like there's you know, but they're just
old and they don't want to do it, So there's that,
but it is if it grows on this side, if
there's some things that you know, or if I start
feeling away and they find out then it's genetic and
(30:32):
I'll have to get my kids tested, which that is
that's the biggest fear of this is just hoping that
that never occurs. So I know that my kids are
okay because I guess that, and the worst thing that
come this is not cancer, so we are so grateful
for that. But if you get it on both sides,
and you know, you remove it because it's affecting your
(30:55):
overall equilibrium, you can lose your hearing in both years
and then all of a sudden and you don't have
your hearing anymore. So that is the fear when it
comes to my kids getting it and stuff like that.
But other than that, it's pretty I feel good. I'm
so happy it's done with and I try not to
think about you know too much, so yeah.
Speaker 2 (31:17):
Well good. It's always like so scary, but like that,
I'm big on. There's something else too that I've been
you know, starting to be a part of all just again,
all preventative stuff, like okay, what can we be doing
to help prevent things. You know, I know it's not
a cure for things, but anything preventative. I'm just like you,
John side Far moving on to the other thing you have,
(31:37):
So is it? There are two podcasts kind of like
one in like two in one because I saw the
timeout than the morning after or the morning after.
Speaker 3 (31:45):
The Timeout is literally thanks to Taylor Swift because she's
gotten a lot of women and football, and the timeout
is literally based is about football. It's usually like the
experience of game day that we went through, and also
just the NFL in general, like the score, stuff like that,
but also learning the game starting from the bottom, trying
(32:09):
to teach and actually, like, as I'm doing this, I'm
realizing how much I don't know. I was talking to
Math the other day and I like looked at him
at one point. So you're telling me you do a
million things before that ball snapped. I'm talking. I can't
even imagine. I go, how do you sleep at night?
Like my brain would be turning at every And that's
what moms do, right, We think about every scenario that
(32:31):
we have to do that we haven't done. Things like that.
He sleeps like a log. But I will say, is
it is a lot tougher than I thought to know
the very much ins and outs. I know the basics,
which helps me watch it. But that's what time Out is.
It's basically like learning the basics so people can enjoy
it more when they're watching it with their sygnegica, ooh,
significant other, sorry and stuff like that. And then The
(32:54):
Morning After is really just a modern podcast about modern relationships, marriages, parenting,
kind of what we were talking about, just being realistic
about all of that. And the reason I started because
I was really tired and really down on myself on
a lot of things as a parent, as a wife,
with my looks, Like I moved to La and there's
(33:16):
god knows all these there's beautiful women in Michigan here,
there's beautiful women here, and I was down on a
lot and I realized, like I am staring into a
screen full of everybody's best and I kind of just
wanted to create a space where we talk about maybe
not all of our best things, but maybe we like
mix it up and talk about some of our failures
(33:37):
so that we don't feel so alone when we do
fail in all these relationships in a way, So.
Speaker 2 (33:43):
Yeah, when you brought that up to matt How was
his or Matthew, how was his response? Like was he like,
I'm so proud of you, Yes, go do it? Or
(34:03):
was there was a little or was there he hesitancy
because the things that you might share well and is
there any awful limits? Because I've seen some headlines, so
I was like, I know there are plenty of things
that I wish I could go back. I mean, there's
a because unfortunately I forget that people listen and then
and then it becomes the headline and then I'm like
why did I say that? Like what for what reason
(34:25):
did I say that? And then it's like you can't
apologize for everything you say, so then you just kind
of kind of keep on going. And I've saw you
lean into it, you like kind of called the tour
chase and the case, you know what I mean. I
was like, she's she's at least leaning into it, So like,
how do you deal with when you see a headline?
Cause I about vomit every time. I'm like, I like so,
but I also you know then I'm like then I
(34:46):
then she gets pissed at me because I'm like, well,
I gotta be really careful what I say I gotta
be my stop, like just talk.
Speaker 3 (34:52):
So tell me I agree with you. I you know,
it's tough because I have to protect him in a
way just because he has a franchise behind him. But
at the same time, I tell myself of these headlines,
they are picking things out and making it sound like
something it's not. That is their job now as media.
(35:13):
We know it's like it's all clickbait. There's no actual
well there is, but like journalism is tougher now because
they have to be the first ones to deliver it.
But you know, some headlines are tougher than others. I
you know the one you're talking about that Honestly, Matthew
and I kind of laughed at that one because it
got so blown up. And if you knew us when
(35:35):
we were seventeen when this was occurring, I think you
would kind of laugh with us. But it is. It's
something that I'm human, Like things affect me, what people
say affects me. I'm not going to sit here and
say I don't give a shit, because I do. But
I also have to remind myself, like if I'm standing
(35:56):
by who I am and if I'm being my real self,
and that's what that podcast is, Like, I am vulnerable,
I am out there. I want to be me because
I feel like for a long time I was just
Matthew's girlfriend or wife, and I had to play this
role and look a certain way and all these things,
and I just I got worn out and I lost myself.
And so with this podcast, I'm kind of finding who
(36:18):
I am again. And I always tell him like, you
know what, if people don't like that, then they don't
have to listen. And headlines are always going to give
you not a good feeling. I don't care if it's
good or bad, because somewhere it just it feels.
Speaker 2 (36:33):
They've never actually put a good one out because they
don't want it. It's not really intended to be like
they want you to click on it. No one would
be like she's so in love, click here, you know exactly, So.
Speaker 3 (36:43):
They're all not fun. I totally agree. So, I mean,
I don't deal with it well by any means, but
I just try to remind myself, like, well that was
the truth. It is what it is. And I could
easily have been like, you know what, yes, we were
the quarterback and cheerleader and we fell in love. It
for site and we were the best couple ever. But
it's just not true. Like we did the ups and
(37:06):
downs through college and we loved and hated each other
and it was it was what we needed to get
to where we are now. So and that's another thing,
like understanding, like where you are now is because of
all these things that it might have happened, and all
these headlines, whether they be good or bad, is it
got you to where you are now as a person?
Speaker 2 (37:26):
And is he like this is is there anything that's
off limits or is he just so supportive of Oh yeah,
because of having your voice, Like like you said, like
you've just been you know, Matthew Stafford's wife, and it's
like no, like you're coming out and you're coming out
into the light and like having a voice and.
Speaker 3 (37:41):
And and I will. He's so proud of me in
that way. He's like he always when he sits in here,
he's on some podcasts. You've gotten really good at this
like this is it seems very natural for you and
I love that. But there are off limit things like
I mentioned something about I don't even know what it was,
but it affected his life. Room that is a huge No,
(38:02):
Like that was like Ooh, I'm going to go get
a hotel room. He's going to be pissed. Kind of situation. Now,
I didn't do that because I have four kids here,
so I can't really do that.
Speaker 2 (38:13):
That would be amazing you and leave them. Yeah, I
like it.
Speaker 3 (38:17):
Actually, what a joyful day. Yeah, I'm gonna go to
the SPA have a great day. No, so that is
off limits. I mean anything that's too personal, I'll never
get into, like our sex life or anything like that.
That's just off limits for me. But other than that,
I mean, he's pretty, he's he likes me showing this
side of myself. He's like, this is the side I
(38:39):
fell in love with, So why wouldn't I want the
world to see this side? So, yes, he is very sportive.
Now headlines are headlined, so you know, every once in
a while he'll be like, oh man.
Speaker 2 (38:48):
Count So I know, I know it's like that. Why
did I say that? Yeah, it's likecause you you felt
that way, I know, or.
Speaker 3 (38:58):
Maybe you couldn't. We could have said it different differently.
Speaker 2 (39:01):
Yeah, that's yeah, that's the hard part in hindsight. Sure
wouldn't that be great if we all said things differently?
Speaker 3 (39:06):
Yeah?
Speaker 2 (39:07):
We just have a mic in front of us.
Speaker 3 (39:09):
Yes, nobody would ever get in fights. Be great, we'd
be so calm and peaceful, but that's just not the way.
Speaker 2 (39:15):
So yeah, well, thank you for coming on and thank
you for accepting my apology. Back in the day when
I said Matthew was the problem, was the reason why
the Lions always lost, and then the next year they
went on to win the Super Bowl.
Speaker 3 (39:27):
For the RAM so I was like, cool, all right,
well heyde and I'm very happy for the Lions. They
are so fun to watch. I mean, it is what
every time I turn on TV and I'm looking at
I'm like god less, and you watch them play and
they're just enjoying it. So I'm so happy, and I'm.
Speaker 2 (39:44):
Sorry about the fans because that's the well that they
you know, And that's like my husband is always he's
telling me things because he was he grew up in
the Premier League of playing and coaching, and those fans
are so mean to even their own like players, you know,
our own people, and I'm just like, I I can't
get over it. But when you even said they're like
when you boo at the kids, and that's that's a
(40:06):
big no. Like you remember that one someone just yelled
at No matter who you're voting for, it, don't yell
at the kids. I saw the something going viral of
the supporter of someone yelling at a child, and I'm like, no, no, like, yeah,
when you're not booing or yelling at kids. And I
do know they were booing and yelling at me, but
when my kids are standing right next to me, they
don't know the difference they're getting, you know, taught like
(40:26):
I mean, it was, But at the same time, there
were plenty of fans there who were so kind. And
that's what I was gonna say. You're like, we only
hear those voices. There are thousands of other people that
are cheering you on. It's like the headlines, you know,
you only you only see the bad ones.
Speaker 3 (40:42):
Well they only appear anyways, but uh yeah, and those
fans like you tend to remember only the bad things.
And that's I don't know why we do that as
humans what we do. So that was that. That sucked.
But again, I like, look back at that and go
there those are. It's such a passionate fan base that
I miss in a lot of ways. So can you
(41:04):
blame them? Not really? I just next time, won't make
the mistake of going on the field, you know, like
that that was my mistake. I won't take my kids
down there like that. If we ever in back of Michigan,
we'll just you know, go quietly to our seats and
sit and watch. But I do I miss Michigan. It's
(41:24):
it's such an amazing town full of great people that
we definitely miss. But I'm happy for y'all. I'm happy
for I'm so happy for that Lion's team, like I hope, well,
I can't say it because we are still playing.
Speaker 2 (41:38):
But you know, I they deserve they deserve their time.
Speaker 3 (41:41):
Yes, absolutely, and I live my lifetime. Yes, if it's
not us, it's I would. I would hope it's y'all.
Speaker 2 (41:47):
So well, Kelly, it was lovely to finally connect and
tell our listeners where they can listen and find you.
Speaker 3 (41:54):
Yeah, you can listen to The Morning After with Kelly
and Hank wherever you get your podcasts. Also with time out.
Time out drops on Tuesdays. In the Morning After drops
on Thursdays, So it's fun. I appreciate you guys having
me on. It was thanks to finally connect.
Speaker 2 (42:08):
Yes, the same love to see you and congrats with everything.
Speaker 3 (42:11):
All right, thanks for all you too.
Speaker 2 (42:13):
Bye bye. Who's your team do you root for?
Speaker 1 (42:17):
Not NFL? I mean Titans, I guess, but no, just
college they're always bad.
Speaker 2 (42:22):
We like the Lions, k they're terrible.
Speaker 1 (42:25):
So there.
Speaker 2 (42:25):
I mean, I would say Titans just because I'm from Tennessee.
Speaker 1 (42:28):
Sure, but like we're just we're just we're just college
football because even growing up, like my parents really just
watched or my dad just really watched U T and
then now born or married into Alabama. Yeah, so you
don't really then watch it, I guess not right now?
Speaker 2 (42:45):
Yeah, I mean I just Alabama doing.
Speaker 1 (42:47):
Vandy beat them, but they bandy also beat Oh god,
there was another really good team they beat this year apparently.
But I don't I get I get bits and pieces
now because I don't. We don't pay attention as much
as we used to because we're so But now Kate
into it too, so like he'll be like in the
car watching it, like I don't know, but I don't
think we're very good.
Speaker 2 (43:06):
Yeah, it's fun. I just I'll never forget that because
I mean, god, I just I went off, So what happened?
So okay, vaguely remember this. Matthew Stafford was on the
lines for I mean, I'm gonna probably like I make
up that it was like six something years. Maybe I
make up that it was at least a long time. Okay,
(43:27):
maybe Eastern Orhannah would lovely google that right now and see.
But forever, and I just kept saying it's Matt like,
it's Matt, like, Matt's the problem. And I don't know
if it was because my high school sweets name is Matthew,
and so I like connected the two Michigan saying this
twelve seasons, there goes a lot. It's probably a long
long time, right, so like so many years, and I'm
(43:48):
just like, he's the problem, Like he is the reason
that we are losing all the time because of the
interceptions or the drop right passes. So if you're gonna
blame like you know, of course you got to just
blame the quarter quarterback. Yeah. Then he they trade golf
for Stafford. And that next year, so that first year
(44:08):
that Stafford goes to the Rams, he wins a Super Bowl.
Oh wow. And I was like, well, wait, so did
you say this out loud?
Speaker 3 (44:16):
Yeah?
Speaker 2 (44:16):
Pretty much? Did you did you say it but like, ho,
now know that you said this because we were like
DM sometimes and I made a public apology on Instagram
like one of my stories, and I was like, yo, sorry,
Stafford's like totally always blamed you guys, but congrats on
your super Bowl.
Speaker 1 (44:35):
When say you said then, yeah, like when you were
being nice, you said you always blamed him.
Speaker 2 (44:42):
I probably did, like over family dinners and stuff too,
you know. So just wanted to well, she seems like
she handled that well yes, no, oh yeah, she's she's
I mean, like, you know, they're always the quarterback. That
would be so hard. It's like the goalie in the hockey.
You're gonna blame Oscar. He was the best. But I'm sorry.
(45:04):
My Michigan is coming out of me right now. But anyways,
love it, I love it. Chat next week. Bye bye
bye h
Host
Jana Kramer
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