January 9, 2023 • 47 mins
Jana and her queendom get real about the truths of plastic surgery with surgeon Dr. John Layke and learn about the changing perspectives when it comes to these procedures.
Dr. Layke shares a mind-blowing fact about how we view our own faces.
And, Jana has some EXCITING news to share!
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:01):
Wind Down with Jane Kramer and I Heart Radio podcast.
So we're not in the same location today, Um, welcome
to wind Down. I am in England, Katherine Christen, where
are you guys at Nashville? Nashville? Not in my closet
this time. Last time I talked to you remotely, I
(00:22):
was in an empty closet, just an empty background. But
I'm at home. This feels very weird that we're like this.
I'm such a snugger that I have withdrawals when you
guys are not in the same room as me. So
I'm like, this is fine, Like I'll do it, but
I need to like hold you. Yeah, no, this is
(00:43):
this is This is like a you know, an update
when we start and then we'll update after. Like I
need an update on your life, Like what's going on
in your life? Janna. I haven't seen you forever talk
to us, Karmen san Diego because left in England and
I don't have you talked to you since before then,
So like, give me something, what's up with your life?
(01:05):
Give me something? Um, so I'm I'm back over in England. Um, yeah,
I had the had the weekend off and what do
you want to know? So she has a a gentleman
friend in England. For the people that are listening that
(01:26):
missed an episode, and it went so well the first
time our little jet setters back international time out. Did
you guys see the instagram that I put? That's next
we'll talk about in a second. Let's just year in Scotland. Know,
(01:47):
I'm in England right now. I went to Scotland for
two days because he had two off days. So, um,
what did you do in Scotland? Want to share? Went
and saw this beautiful cathedral it was so pretty. Visited
a few people and uh, saw like this really cool
(02:07):
It's called like Necropolis or something, but these like old
cemetery grave sites from way back into the hundreds. I mean,
it was just it was so cool. Um, it's you know,
it's so strange though it is. The last time I
was in Scotland, it was with my ex and we
were it was from my best friend's wedding, one of
(02:28):
my best friend's wedding amy and it was just you know,
like you have those moments where you're like never in
a million years getting out of that rental car of
you know, my ex trying to drive in Scotland did
I think. Oh, in let's see how in four years
I'm going to be here with my boyfriend? Right? Can
(02:54):
we go back to that? I'm so sorry with the
most you've been to Scotland before. But boyfriend, is this
why we have a uh picture? Yeah, that hand holding official.
I can appreciate the protection that we have given this
gentleman as he is dapper and sweet and goodhearted. He's
(03:15):
a national treasure over there, he's a sweetheart. And yeah, nos, yeah,
I I am. I am not single, so and it
is one that official. Yes, I mean, she hadn't even
like hesitate with my boyfriend. But isn't that weird though?
Like have you ever had those moments? I mean, I'm
(03:36):
sure like in situations where you're like, I'm like, it's
just so funny how the life in the world works.
It's like I never would have I mean to be
back in that spot and and and it's like or
like you know, four years ago to be like, oh, yeah,
I'm gonna be here again with you know, I'm gonna
be divorced and and then I'm gonna come back here
with a boyfriend who grew up here. Yeah, it's just
(03:59):
like I don't know I had just like that moment
driving like this is this is very It's interesting how
the world works. I think it's important for people to
hear that because I've gotten a lot of um. I
get a lot of your people that reach out asking
me about like, you know, because we've talked about divorce
and stuff and then and I always tell them I'm like,
you have to, especially because I've been really passionate about
(04:20):
this little movement I made about one more minute with
battling depression, and I'm like, you just don't even know
all the goodness that is coming to you, like those
dark times you could I mean you, guys, I sat
on the floor in an apartment in Kansas City and
I thought about ending my life and on the other
side of those minutes was two babies and a husband
(04:43):
and love again and and and a lot of bs two.
I'll be honest, Like, our industry is hard, and it's
hard to be married in our industry, but it's also
like there is so much Like when you say, I
get out of a rental car with my boyfriend who
was born in Scotlan, like because you can never you
just don't know. And that's like the fun scavenger hunt
(05:06):
of the way our life works. No, but it's true though,
And I think, like, I mean, we've all been in
those moments and shoot, like however many you know to
two and a half years ago, Like I'm on the ground,
like crying my my eyes out, and like I don't
think anyone's gonna ever love me. And I'm you know,
who who would want to be with me? And I'm um,
you know I'm never gonna find love again. I'm unlovable.
(05:27):
And it's like I think, you know the lesson and
all of this is like that's just not true, Like
you will find love again. And and this my I
don't know if this is my forever person. I've got
some things that maybe one day I'll share if it
comes to fruition. But like you know, it's like I'm
gonna just I'm not going to push away love just
(05:51):
because I've been hurt before. I'm gonna embrace it. I'm
gonna have fun. I'm gonna and if it doesn't work out, well,
you know what, I'm gonna learn a lot of lessons.
And I had a lot of fun on the way.
So's noting to Creamer that you were like for a
long time you were like, no, way would I do
international boyfriend. No. I think it's worth noting that at
(06:13):
some point maybe our own rules are what stand in
the way of us meeting and enjoying another human being,
like the person that you have now as a boyfriend.
I just want to keep saying it, um because once
you decided to, like, let that hurdle not be a hurdle.
Look at you, You're glowing England, I know. I mean
(06:34):
it's truly. I mean I you know, even like when
I was on that app, I was like, no, they
live in a different country, like no, no, no, And
you know, even with him, I said no, Like I
was just like no, I just like this is this
is silly. I'm a mom with two kids and I
live in Nashville, Like this, how would this even work?
And something about him just you know, I was like, Okay,
(06:57):
well let me just see you know, like what what
does a conversation hurt? Right? And you know, now there's
something well I don't want to say too much, but
I it just this just feels different. And again, if
it doesn't work out, and I hate to say that,
but I just I'm realistic to the point where um,
(07:19):
I want people to know that no matter what, like
you will be okay and you won't be alone you
and and to let love in whether you end up
getting hurt or it's here forever. I think that's like
something that I've really realized because again I was so
just like I'm not I'm never going to be loved.
I mean even you know our friends that have gone through,
like we've all felt that way, like we're unlovable and
(07:40):
we're never going to find love. And once I found
peace within myself and not like having to have that,
it's kind of found me. Well, I think you also
believe that no matter what happens with this relationship and
correct me if I'm wrong, that you're okay, yeah, oh yeah,
fine to be fine. You're going to And that's just
(08:03):
so different for you, you know what I mean, And
like you took a lot of work for you to
get there, to truly believe that, And I think, in
my personal opinion, I think that's what made it so
easy for you to jump in, because you actually believe
that this time that and this one's different, Like I'm
not like I would pull so many tactics to like
try to push someone away because I didn't. It's it's
(08:26):
almost like I almost didn't believe that I deserved it.
And also like I just knew they would leave so
or they would end up lying or or doing something
and so but I'm I'm just who I am in
this relationship is who I've always wanted to be and
what I've always like. I always said, like I have
a lot of love to give, and I I like,
(08:48):
I like, I want to give my love to this
and it has a safe place to land this time. Yeah,
and the Hairways is so happy to have you. Well
that's the thing. I'm kind of like, okay, my, in
my back of my mind, I mean, people are like
or you know, like how would this ever work? And
I'm like, I don't know And I'm not even like
putting stress on it because it's just I'm just enjoying
(09:09):
where it's at right now and I'm enjoying feeling this way.
And why I'm out here so soon is because we're
trying not to go more than three weeks that's seeing
each other. So um, yes, it was a week later
I flew out here, but only because I can't come
back for because you know, weekends and Joel's you know,
there's things that I couldn't rearranged, and right now he's
(09:32):
with his job, he can't come, so, um, you know,
I'll have to do more of like the bulk of
the flying and then for the next few months. But
I'm excited about it, and um, you know in three
weeks hopefully I'll be back and yeah, bring him to us.
When does he come to us? Yeah, that's my next question.
I feel like you're keeping him over the pond. Bring
(09:55):
him to meet him? Um, yeah, I mean it just depends,
like with work and stuff, you're just not giving too much,
which I'm like really proud of. But then also the
people want to know Cramer. I'm happy, and I think
that's the that's the piece where I'm just like it
(10:18):
just feels really nice and just yeah, I'm I'm just
I don't want to put too much like pressure on
it and I just want to enjoy enjoy it. Would
you like to give your listeners any hints about this
person or any information at all, like any um for
(10:38):
this is an easter egg. For a long time ago,
Mark had asked or had told me who he thinks
I should end up with. What sport and he's right.
Remember I wish Mark was here. Was good. We need
(10:59):
Mark that was used so if you all want to
go back, you can find it there. Good. I wish
everyone could see the group chat that happens while we're
doing because my heart l A is like, yeah, everyone's
so sweet about it. Yeah Mark, Mark was like, I
would really like to see you be with someone who X,
(11:21):
Y and Z played the plas. Yeah. Now everyone exits
this podcast and goes back to re listen. But yeah,
very happy, Janna, thank you. I'm like, I'm yeah, So
it's gonna be tough. I mean, I've never done long distance,
but again I'm just enjoying being happy and it's all good,
(11:42):
Like there's there's gonna be lessons learned along the way.
I'll learned things out whether it works out or whether
it doesn't. And um, I think that's the piece that
I know either way, Like I'm okay. One thing I love, love,
love about long distance, which I know is like the
double edged sword. But in Preston, I did a lot
of not seeing each other for a really long time
until we saw so much of each other that we
(12:02):
made a million babies. But the you have to have trust.
You build a different level of trust with each other
and a different level of intimacy and intention because you
can't pick each other up for a date night. Yeah,
and anything really cool about that. Yeah, I'll never get
(12:23):
into a situation again where I can't trust someone because
I do not like who I become. Um and so,
but there's something again, something is just very different about
this relationship that I have like zero worries or fear.
So I'm just and if something was to happen again,
I'm like, all right, like thanks for showing me who
you are and I'm out, you know, so and again
(12:46):
I'll find the lessons in it, so Cramer. So but
I'll be how many few days and we'll be together
next week and it'll be great. So and we'll go
from there. But UM, bring him to us, Yeah, hopefully
one day. But we have Dr lakey On. He's a
(13:08):
plastic surgeon, you guys. But he wrote a book which
I think is really cool, Um, basically about loving yourself.
Because he's got m he's got some kids, and so
I think that's going to be interesting. It's called Nobody
Is the Same, a book about body positivity. So we're
going to get him on Chris, and I know you've
wanted some things in the plastic surgery area, um, which
(13:32):
I think you're beautiful. You don't need anything, but I
know how we all look at ourselves and your noses
grow forever. That's all. I just need to talk to
him about a little tiny touch up. Really do your
nose and your ears? I think that's true in your
face drinks. Oh that's when you get like when you
see older people, it's because their face is shrunken him,
but they're not like I didn't know, so maybe that's
(13:55):
why the noses look bigger. I thought, you're we need
to like, yeah, we need a doctor because this is
all misinformation and some call the doctor. All right, let's
get Dr Laky. He is part of the Beverly Hills
Classic Surgeon Dr John Lakey, co founder of Beverly Hills Empty.
(14:27):
Dr Lakey, how are you fantastic? Good morning? Good morning? Um, okay,
I have well, we all have a lot of questions
for you, but I want to talk about your book.
But I first want to talk about can I we
talk about the plastic surgery side of things first of course? Okay,
so what do you specialize in for plastic surgeries. It
(14:49):
is it all surgeries or UM's started off that way,
trained in everything and operating from petatoe and then slowly
found my dich So I'm really neck up my partner's
neck own. So it just makes it easy a combination
of both partners. It makes for a quick recovery. We'll see.
(15:10):
Um Yeah, listen, I just found my my niche. I
really enjoy operating face. I think it's very detailed and uh,
there's a lot of artistry and finesse involved, and so
I just tended to gravitate towards that. Have you found
an increase of UM face classic surgery since filters have
entered Instagram? Definitely? I mean I I think a thousand
(15:33):
percent um The you know, now the interesting part, especially
in Beverly Hills and we get all kinds of requests,
but I have people who flying from all over the
world asking to look like a particular filter. And I
think that with the advent of social media, although it's
amazing for extrapolating data and getting your information as quickly
(15:55):
as possible, I think that our perceptions of what beauty is, um,
you know, what a human should look like is is
drastically changed. I think, you know, some of the concepts
are still there. I mean, they'll will always be prevalent
in society, but now some of the altered uh you know,
facial features based off of a filter. You know, it's
(16:19):
it's amazing to me, so um, you know, and that's
ultimately where I started this, this kind of kind of
this idea. I have three toddlers of my own, and
so um, it's hard being a plastic surgeon and telling them, oh, listen,
you know, you're beautiful the way you are, and as
they grow, it will be more difficult, especially you know
(16:41):
in teen years. I mean I think that, you know,
our perception of our own self and our own self worth,
our own self beauty can greatly influence our mental status.
And so this is how depression and eating disorders and
then anxiety, you know, image disturbances, body dysmorphia, all these
(17:05):
things develop at a relatively young age. And I think
that now watching young teens and preteens stare at their
phones incessantly, um, I think we're gonna be in for
for some trouble. So then are you for having conflict
kind of then in yourself with what you do and
then and then being in the position obviously as a
(17:27):
dad and everything else. You know, the interesting part. I'm
definitely not working myself out of a career. That's you know.
I think there's always a place for even cosmetic surgery.
Definitely reconstructive curcuity, but there's definitely a place for cosmetic surgery.
I think that if you're comfortable in your own skin,
and you have tried to do something to better yourself,
(17:50):
and there's one thing that bothers you, and and everybody has.
I mean, we have supermodels that come in and say
this really bothers me, and you'll stare at and then
think I don't and understand. But you know, everybody has
that within themselves. And um, you know, for the sixteen
year old that's getting bullied because you know, her nose
is cricket or too large, or um, you know, for
(18:14):
the the boy who's trying to play sports you can't
breathe or you know. I think that there's always going
to be a place for a plastic reconstructive surgery. UM.
I just think that the trends are going so far
off the track that you know it frankly, you know,
(18:36):
I think some of it is becoming ridiculous. Well, I'll,
I mean, I'll call myself out where you know. I
remember I was I was waitressing justin Los Angeles. I
was nineteen years old and I was waitressing at this um.
I was doing like this red bull thing at this
plastic surgeon's house, and I said, if there's one thing
you could do to my face, what would you do?
(18:57):
And he goes your nose. And ever since then, I've
been so self conscious of my nose. Even so Katherine's
at the top, there's also my managers. I'm always like,
oh no, I hate that picture. My nose looks big,
and my nose looks big, and so since these filters,
I'm like, I have this one and I go, oh wow,
I like my nose better in this filter, and so
it's hard for me. But I'm like, but that's so
(19:19):
awful that I'm like wanting to use this filter because
I like the way my nose looks better in it.
But then when I turn it off the filter, I'm like, oh,
and then I don't like myself, and then I'm then
I'm just like I throw my phone because I'm like,
this is I get like insecure, and I'm like this
is ridiculous, yes, which you know and listen, we can't
take a step back and say, you know, that's obviously ridiculous.
(19:40):
You're gorgeous. The thing is even with you know, when
you look at the Halley berries, when you look at
the Jennifer Iniston's where they have subtle fine uh you know,
will say refinements. Um, I don't know that that is
necessarily as bad as you know, trying to create a
(20:02):
tap filter or a you know, the pinched tip. You
know where it's clearly not it looks like more of
an avatar that it does a human. Um. Again, I
think what I enjoy doing is those subtle refinements, making
them look as though you were born with them. And
these aren't things. Again, we all obsessed about tiny little things.
(20:25):
It doesn't mean you don't love yourself, but there are
certain instances where you know you want to improve something,
and that's where you know there is that conflict where
you know, I start off by saying, listen, and this
is the base. You have to love yourself first for
who you are. Then you choose to change something. That's
completely fine. If it's to the point where your reclusive
(20:49):
because someone has commented or bullied or you know, made
reference to something that you thought was normal until someone
brought it up. It's a different ball game. And I
think that as a society as a whole, you know,
if we approach there wouldn't be such animosity, would be
such a divide, There wouldn't, you know, be such stratification
(21:12):
if everybody was as accepting. It doesn't mean you can't
change something about yourself. I mean, because that's more of
a personal decision. It's not that society is making. Yeah,
I mean, I got a blue job the last year
and it was one of the best things. I love it. Like,
I'm just like, this is It's not that I didn't
like my body. It is just but now I'm like,
(21:32):
I'm more confident and definitely you fill out clothing you
it's a complete different mentality. So again, there's nothing wrong
with that. That's never what I'm going to say because
that's the job. But I do think that if it
was that someone had told you, look, you know, you're pretty,
but if you really were a sea cup or higher,
(21:56):
you'd be a lot prettier. The idea is, you know, again,
when we focus on something that we want to improve,
in ourselves full different ball game with society is pressured, right,
I mean, Kristen, you kind of um talked about wanting
to do things and what if love comes to you
(22:17):
and says like, I know when Julie she asked me,
I'm obviously like, hey, when you're older and those are
those are your choices. But I mean, is that like,
how would you like where's your stance on that? Well?
This is what's tricky for me because I've always it's
interesting that he talks about I just really, first of all,
I really enjoy your perspective on this a lot because
it is about loving yourself first. And I just turned
(22:39):
forty one a couple of days ago. I really like,
thank you, capricordination. I really really I love myself. I
think I'm a wonderful human. Took a lot of work,
um to say that. But I have always wanted my
nose done. I can't even tell you. I would say
that it stems from here's a quick funny story. My
(23:01):
mom had a dream when she was pregnant with me
that she gave birth to a nose. And that is
because my mom and my dad have these like huge noses.
When my dad passed a year ago and I have
since gone like, well, gosh, if I changed too much
about my face, then he's, you know, like part of
that is so it's your lineage too. And recently went
(23:21):
over to London into France and we have some French
in us too, and I thought, well, man, that's what
makes us us. You know. I feel like we're such
a copy paste society here that it sometimes makes me
sad because we're losing all these really beautiful, ethnic, wonderful
parts of our lineage by the way we're changing all
that to say, I do get injections. I love botox.
(23:42):
I can't get enough. Um amen, sister, I mean nothing.
A lip never hurt anybody. Listen, there's nothing wrong with
slowing down the aging process. And you know the funny
part is my specialty is really brand and plastic facelik.
So this is all I do all the long. The
idea is this that, um, you know, obviously, when we
(24:05):
look at someone are our brain takes the better half
and naturally replicates it. And that's why the common phrase
they look better in person. Most people hate themselves and
photos because it doesn't do that. When you look at
the nose it's a secondary characteristic, believe it or not.
And that's why when you wear a mask, all your
friends and family know exactly who you are because they
see this. Um you know, and as a society, I
(24:26):
think that will always be prevalent. U making minor changes
does not change your ethnicity, does not change your personality.
That it may give you some more confidence and undeniably
there's no reason for it. But UM, I think the
(24:47):
when we start as a whole and say, look, you're
fine if you do, you're fine if you don't, that's
a different ball game. I think right now society is
saying this is what has beautiful. Uh, put this filter
on to make yourself more beautiful. And that's where we're
kind of, you know again, running off that track. And uh,
(25:10):
I will never ever say if there's anything wrong with
if you say, look, I just want to change my
nose a little bit or do by all means, that's
that is what I do. That's my job. But the
when I look at some of these little kids, and
even I see five or six year olds, they point
things out and say, why, you know, why is that
(25:33):
person like that or why you know? I think teaching
them early that we're all different, we're all unique, and
we're all special, we're all beautiful. Uh. It gives you
that confidence. So then when we get into our teenage years,
no one is really You don't see that group off
in the corner that doesn't talk to anyone because they're
(25:53):
you know, they've been shamed so much that they can't
express their feelings or personality. Um, you know, we have
less mental health issues, I believe as a result of that.
And so once we can make it past those teen years,
you know, the world's royster. You can now it's a
different mentality, and so you know, you can change anything
(26:17):
about yourself. It's for yourself. And I think you know,
as an example, we'll have patients that come in and
the husband or wife is saying, Okay, he needs this
or she needs this, this, this, this this, and you're
looking at them thinking, uh, you know, I'm gonna let
them talk for a second just so they can tell
me what they true want, because um, you know it
(26:39):
just puts a bad taste. Well, yeah, they also need
a lawyer work. Returning would be wonderful. And everything that
I wanted to do is truly just for myself. The
nose wouldn't be a new nose. I don't ever want
to look like a different person. I just want to
look I want to look like maybe I didn't make
up a little different. And I think that's exactly you know,
(27:00):
it's you know, well, it's a permanent confluence. How old
are your kids. I have twin boys that are six
and a half and I have a little religious from five. Yeah,
with our daughters, um Jana and I have talked about
this a lot too, because like, I never want to
not look like my kids either, and I've done a
(27:20):
really good job of dominating the gene pool, and so
they look a lot like me. And I'm like, well,
I never want us to look not like we're related.
So I think that's also really important too, and I
would I'd have to be really careful about how I
approached it. I think your view on everything is so
beautiful and wonderful, though, because it is a little bit frustrating.
We live in this society where everything is so copy paste.
(27:42):
I mean, I have like a trainer, I'm working now,
I can't get my butt any higher, I can't get
my hips anything, And then you find out all these
cheats that everyone's doing and you're like, well, this is
apples and oranges. This isn't fair. I'm pretty open about
the injectables and stuff like that online just because I
do think. You know, I've got girls in my hometown going, oh,
well you never age, and I'm like, listen, you can
(28:03):
be a bedroom a button too. You just have to
find the right person. Yes, I mean, cat, you're I
mean I as an older even you've obviously got a
little bit older of kids too. It's so I mean,
you have to probably see that in the social media
aspect and that's probably got to, you know, be really challenging.
And I'm gonna be leaning on you too as my girls,
you know, as Jolie gets older, and it's so hard.
(28:26):
So I have an eleven year old and I've actually
been dealing with this because she does have a phone.
She did have social media, but she currently does not,
because you know, I was going through because I go
through her phone all the time, and it's like they're
literally talking about you want to curvey your girl. I'm like,
you were eleven years old. When I was little, everyone
(28:46):
wanted to be skinny. Like she's skinny, she's beautiful, she's
I mean all the things and it's like that you
just boys want curvy your girls and girls that I
was just like, what is happening? Like it's it's scary
because it starts early. Yeah, the introduction is so much younger,
and uh, you know, concepts are changing. Listen, if you
look at most schools, you know, unfortunate enough for my
(29:09):
kids are in private school, but still the concepts that
are introduced there, I think, are you know, they're they're
fairly young for all of these things. But that's the
way you know, society is going. I think, you know,
we have more information, more education, more you know, it's
kind of drinking out of a fire hydrant as opposed
to you know, a water found and um, that's you know,
(29:34):
it's inevitable, and I think there has to be a
way to teach it the right way. Um, Otherwise, you know,
we're going to run into the same concepts over and
over and over. And I think as society we're doing that.
We're slowly going down that path. It's repeated, repetitive. You know. Um,
we were as a whole, we're looking for change, but
(29:56):
we're doing the same things. And I think that this
is one way of trying to introduce the concept early
and you know, whether it works or not, we'll we'll
definitely see. So with your with your children's book that
you wrote, I mean, I love, I love the whole
concept of it, obviously self love. Can you just give
(30:16):
like a an overview of about the book and and
obviously I'm gonna get it to read my girl every
single night so she knows, you know what, I'll send
it to you. Oh support, we support here, thank you. Um,
you know, so the book Body Positivity ultimately is nobody
is the same, and so it introduces several little kids
(30:40):
that all have our different shapes, sizes, ethnicities, and the
ultimate goal at the end is to teach that, um,
you know, we're all unique, we're all special, and we're
all beautiful. And usually people who are bullies have something
going on in their own lives, so we even have
to turn around and offer compassion and so, uh, you know, ultimately,
(31:02):
the end of the book is that you know, we're
all special, we're all unique, and that we should embrace that. Um.
It's interesting because I have two books in the work
and it works. And really these are three things that
I really tried doing with you know, my wife and
I do with our kids, and um, the other two are.
You know, being a gentleman isn't easy, and being a
(31:24):
lady isn't easy. You know, we're reintroducing some older or
ancient concepts, but it's what we do. You know. My
wife's a Texan. Our kids say yes, certa, yes, ma'am. Um,
you know, and and we expect. You know, it's not
emotional maturity, but it's um you know, obedience, you know,
(31:49):
being respectful. Um, you know things like that. So I
forget I would just put it into book form. Well
you're a Midwest guy that, yes, I was. I loved
that Girls minus Cats A Southerner, but Michigan girls good stock,
(32:09):
right there, hard workers, our listeners find you and the book. Um,
so you can order the book on Amazon. The publishing
company is called p D i C. Puppy Dogs and
ice Cream, and uh, you know you can always find
it via our website, which is Beverly Hills Plastic Surgery
(32:33):
Group dot com. You know, I think it's it's again,
it's kind of an oxyb. We're putting these two together.
But if you if you peel back a few the layers,
it's it isn't it's conngruent with my philosophy and the
way I practice plastic surgery. I love that. Well, thank
you for coming out on wind down and maybe I
(32:54):
see in Los Angeles anytimes. Listen. I would love to
to have you, so uh, definitely definitely stopped by when
you're in Oh, I'm stopping by. Look for my chart doctor,
I will, I will take care. I have a great
rest of your week. We get all right. Hey, I'm
(33:23):
Lance Bass, host of the new I Heart podcast Frosted
Tips with Lance Bass. The hardest thing could be knowing
who to turn to when questions arise, or times get tough,
or you're at the end of the road. Okay, I
see what you're doing. Do you ever think to yourself,
what advice would Lance Bass and my favorite boy bands
give me in this situation? If you do, you've come
to the right place because I'm here to help this.
(33:44):
I promise you seriously, I swear, and you won't have
to send an S O S because I'll be there
for you, and so will my husband Michael. Hey, that's me. Yeah,
we know that. Michael and a different hot sexy teen
crush boy bander each week to I do through life
step by step, not another one. Kids, relationships, life in
(34:05):
general can get messy. You may be thinking, this is
the story of my life. Just stop now. If so,
tell everybody, yeah, everybody about my new podcast, and make
sure to listen so we'll never ever have to say
bye bye bye. Listen to Frosted Tips with a Lance
Bass on the I Heart Radio app, Apple podcast or
wherever you listen to podcasts. All right, he was great.
(34:30):
I love you can't wait. I can't I can't even imagine, Like,
you literally have the body I would want, like the
perfect body, and they're over here going you all just
want curbing on. They want the Kardashians, Like that's what's
in everyone's mind now, and that's not even real. That's
not like they have plants and they have things to
(34:51):
take and I'm like, uh, but yeah, we're talking a
lot about that. It's interesting because I was so only
you know, her birthday is coming up this month and
she has been asking for a phone, and I'm like,
baby girl, you are seven, like and so, but in
my mind I'm like, well, like, maybe I can just
(35:11):
get her a phone to like just make so that
way I don't have to always communicate with my ax.
I can just be like I can just call her,
she can call her dad when you know, when she's
with me. And but I'm like, I don't even want
her to have access to I mean, obviously I would
not have her have anything on there ever, you know
what I mean, like until she's thirty. But like I
(35:33):
still like, I don't even want her to have a
phone in her hand because I feel like it's just well,
first of all, suggestion I'm getting RANDI like the gizmo
watch so I can call, you know, they can call
on their watch and they can do all that. I'm
actually getting her that today. But also like I did
it too early with any I will own that. I
(35:54):
will be the first to say with you know, we
were at cheer comps and I wanted to be able
to under I want if I lost her, Like there
were reasons I did it, but I did it too early.
How old? How old was she she was? She had
an iPod, which is basically kind of what you're saying
where they can just do a few things on it
at eight. Okay, she started cheering when she was five.
(36:16):
It was too early. I shouldn't have done it. And
then I think nine. I think I got her a
phone and had a letter her on social media then,
and I let her on social media too early too.
I mean, I will own all of that. I watch
all of it, so in my mind, it's like I'm
keeping an eye on it, which is better than a lot.
I'm learning a lot of people don't keep an eye
on anything. Um. But you know, it's just this fifth
(36:37):
grade year, y'all. They start like, you know, it's everything
we were talking about probably and bickering about and talking
about at school or on the weekends, but now it's
on the phone. We also went as inundated, like we
didn't have you know, I remember watching like there was
some study because I went to school for marketing communication.
(36:58):
I remember there was some study that showed us the
amount of ads or the amount of images we saw
train the perfect body image by the time we had
a certain age. And I can't remember any of that
because I don't remember anything anymore because I have mom dementia.
But I remember being an astronomical amount. And that was
before social media came. So now we are like these
girls are, I mean everywhere that they are, even if
(37:22):
they're not on social media, their friends are even if
they don't have a phone, their friends do and they're
sending that's the thing. Like she has several friends, well,
I'd say maybe a few friends that didn't have a
phone until like now or whatever. There I mean, there's
a group chat kids on it. I'm just like, you
were opening yourself up. Because then people start not necessarily bullying.
(37:42):
I won't say I've seen actual like bullying, but they
start kind of being you know, like it's not okay,
but like we all did it, you know, kind of
in our like kind of being mean to that person
or that person in a way. Maybe we didn't all
do it, but we all had our But it's now
it's it's on text message. I'm like so and says
can screenshot that and in it, and so it's like
you have to understand what you're putting in writing also
(38:03):
can live with you for the rest of your life,
you know. So it's just there's so many lessons, there's
so many things in it, and I hate for them
to feel out of the loop. Like if I took
her phone away right now, it would definitely change her
dynamic good or bad. You know. I mean, everyone communicates
on on there um, but I don't know. Had she
(38:28):
not had one, I don't know, maybe it wouldn't. I
don't know. It's hard. It's so hard. I don't even
That's the thing. That's that's where I'm like struggling because
I'm like, all right, she'll get made fun of if
she doesn't so then she'll have a hard time in school.
And if she does have it, then there's issues there.
And it's like I'm thinking back to like, you know,
even in middle school. Yeah, middle school's tough. High school
(38:48):
there was some like you know, I remember, I remember
there was like this um uh powder puff football thing
and that there was like this list of the hit
that the people I wanted to make sure they hit
and I was on that list, and I was like, so,
um that was that was I mean, I remember that.
(39:11):
But I just look, I can't imagine having social media,
and it's like a part of me is like I
don't even want July to ever have that. But an
at the same time, it's it's like I wish social
media wasn't for comparison and you know, being being nasty
because the comments that people say. I mean, I've now
developed at least thick enough skin. It still hurts to
(39:34):
read negative comments. I mean, we don't like it. You know,
they said things about all of us and it's not nice.
And it's like to have your daughter, our daughter, my daughter,
or my son read those things about themselves and then
you know the everything else that kids talk about that's
scary and I'm just like, oh, I just that piece
of parenting. I'm like, I don't even know what. I
don't know, I don't know what to do, like, and
(39:56):
I haven't really dealt with like the negative comments on
social media yet. I watch it so closely that like,
you know, she hasn't been like attacked or bullied on
social media yet. But what I'm testing and really paying
attention to. It's kind of Christien what you said, because
they're just scrolling, They're just watching video after video after video,
and I'm like, what are they saying? What's getting in
(40:18):
their head to cause them to talk and think the
way that they are. That's kind of where I'm at. More.
I think once they get middle school, high school, they
start bullying more on social media. For sure. We have
friends of ours that have um, she thought she was
and this is, like I would say, more so just
a heads up, and I'm sure there's people listening that
would already know this, but I was like, I don't
(40:41):
know why it shocked me. But we had friends of
ours who have a high schooler and she was like, oh,
I'm on, I follow her and she always has this
like wonderful content and she's so cute and the people
that follow her suite and blah lah lah. And then
she finds out there's another account. Oh yeah, and so
then she's like, well, I don't have I don't have
(41:02):
access to that account of my daughters and then that account.
I mean, I've got to be honest, it's scary to
me how these girls are dressing. It's scary to me
they're learning it also innocently, truly, because it's just all
around them, like the sexy, the crop tops. It's what
I'm wearing a top top right now. And I feel
like a bad mom when I wear because because I'm like,
(41:22):
what am I showing? Then I'm what am I showing
my daughter? It's it's a hard my boobs are out.
I'm like, it gets harder as that gets older, to
be like, hey, you can't wear that if you're wearing
it like I do. Think that that can get but
it's also kind of like there's a lot of things
I can't do I can do, so it's kind of like,
I don't know, it's a hard I think we just
have to say slow and steady and just really aware
(41:45):
and real open. I think the conversation, I mean, listen,
Jane and I have our oldest love is seven today,
So it's not like I'm not I just it overwhelms
me so much. Everyone's like, oh, I can't wait till
my kids are older and they can do this and
they can do that, and I am like, freeze time please,
because everything you're talking about overwhelms me so much it
(42:05):
makes my throat close. I think you just have to
be slow and steady, good mom friends, friends that have
gone before us, the moms that know the tricks and
the apps and the things they can watch for. I
think that as long as you're paying attention and you're aware,
you're already leaps and bounds above ahead of everybody else.
And I hate to say that, but I've been disappointed
and shocked to see how many people don't pay attention.
(42:27):
M Yeah, and I like and I like you. You
said to Chris leaning on like it's a you know,
Catherine will be leaning on you heavily for you know,
things that you know, because obviously you've got an older daughter.
So I mean, I love the gizmo gizmo watch idea
versus you know, the other thing. And yeah, and I
think something I try to do too, Like every morning
(42:48):
and night, I'm always just like trying to reaffirm like
you're beautiful, You're enough, and just ingraining that in her
brain because I'm like, this was the pivotal six was
my childhood trauma age where I didn't feel good enough
and I felt like you know, so it's like I'm
I'm like, all right, this is this These are the
years that I have to really do everything that I
can do to like ingrain that she's like pretty and
(43:10):
beautiful and kind and nice and like enough. And yeah,
I know we all take the head. I know, it's
just because it's just scary and we have someone in
my family who you know, obviously I won't I won't say,
but like she's she's in high school and you know,
even just like I don't want to live and it's
(43:33):
just like you're in high school and it's just it's
just it's just it's just sad, and I just wish,
like first, like I I love, I obviously use social
media as a as a marketing tool and as an
income for my family, so that you know, I'm I'm
grateful for social media and what it's done for for
you know, for um supporting my family. And I also
(43:56):
love that we can reach out to people and um
kind of of do this together. But the negative, the
negative side of social media, it's like, I don't know,
it's like I hate for it to go away, but
I just I don't want. I don't like the negative
side of it. As a girl who had a back
brace and hailer in seventh grade, I'm so glad social
(44:16):
media did not exist. I cannot imagine. I mean, I
know the things that were said about me just from
what I heard. Imagine that's the thing you get behind me,
and uh huh, that's really scary to me. And we
have to protect our little people because it's not even
about like we try to anchor in a little bit
(44:38):
here like what God says about you, what mom and
dad say about you, what you know, like just so
that it's built so sturdy that you hope that that
first like punch or hit or like the first trauma
Jenna is talking about like doesn't destroy them and but
at all. I mean you guys, we both all three
of us, know, you collect those little tidbits over life,
tiny little chip aways, and then before you know it,
(45:00):
you're talking to Dr Lakey about getting a nose job
on a podcast that reaches everyone in I heart. You know,
like what do you I mean, it's just I think
too something that you know, just a call out for
people that are listening, because I know there are the
Reddit trolls that come on and listen just to tear
us down and to say mean comments. So you know,
(45:22):
for those people and that want to go and comment,
just remember that we're all human, we all have feelings,
we all like it's so much easier to be kind
because you don't know what people are going through, You
don't know what they've gone through, what they're going to
go through, and it's like it's just it's so much
easier to just be kind, Like there's no like why
(45:44):
be hateful or hurtful or leave negative comments or be
nasty to someone or say like oh she's got this
or that's you know, she's fat she's too thin, or
she's got a big mess, like just be nice, Like,
I don't understand why you have to be mean because
have feelings. I would challenge the people that feel the
need to comment to take before you hit the first
(46:07):
key in your negative comment about someone that you don't know.
I would just challenge you to take a look inward
to see what it is about yourself that you dislike
that is making you feel the way you feel to
reach out and be hateful to someone, because I think
that's the pause that society is missing. It feels to
me like we're so quick to judge and to listen.
(46:29):
I've been that person too. I've never really been a
mean girl. I don't think. I'm sure there's someone listening
that's like out beg to differ, but I wasn't. I
was mean girl a lot, and I just look back
and I'm like, listen, I don't know. I can't say
her name, although it's it's literally like podcast gold if
you could know her real name, because it's two first names,
(46:50):
and I refer to her as the girl with two
first names. But the girl with two first names probably
actually had a lot going on at home in high
school and I didn't know that, but I you know,
at that age, you're not like, you can't really think
that way. So I just I would just challenge, before
you start to type, take two seconds and wonder about
what it is about yourself or your story, or your
(47:12):
baggage or your hurt or whatever that makes you feel
like you want to attack someone like us for instance,
or anybody. Yeah, but I love you girls, and we'll
be back next week together
Wind Down with Jane Kramer and I Heart Radio podcast.
So we're not in the same location today, Um, welcome
to wind Down. I am in England, Katherine Christen, where
are you guys at Nashville? Nashville? Not in my closet
this time. Last time I talked to you remotely, I
(00:22):
was in an empty closet, just an empty background. But
I'm at home. This feels very weird that we're like this.
I'm such a snugger that I have withdrawals when you
guys are not in the same room as me. So
I'm like, this is fine, Like I'll do it, but
I need to like hold you. Yeah, no, this is
(00:43):
this is This is like a you know, an update
when we start and then we'll update after. Like I
need an update on your life, Like what's going on
in your life? Janna. I haven't seen you forever talk
to us, Karmen san Diego because left in England and
I don't have you talked to you since before then,
So like, give me something, what's up with your life?
(01:05):
Give me something? Um, so I'm I'm back over in England. Um, yeah,
I had the had the weekend off and what do
you want to know? So she has a a gentleman
friend in England. For the people that are listening that
(01:26):
missed an episode, and it went so well the first
time our little jet setters back international time out. Did
you guys see the instagram that I put? That's next
we'll talk about in a second. Let's just year in Scotland. Know,
(01:47):
I'm in England right now. I went to Scotland for
two days because he had two off days. So, um,
what did you do in Scotland? Want to share? Went
and saw this beautiful cathedral it was so pretty. Visited
a few people and uh, saw like this really cool
(02:07):
It's called like Necropolis or something, but these like old
cemetery grave sites from way back into the hundreds. I mean,
it was just it was so cool. Um, it's you know,
it's so strange though it is. The last time I
was in Scotland, it was with my ex and we
were it was from my best friend's wedding, one of
(02:28):
my best friend's wedding amy and it was just you know,
like you have those moments where you're like never in
a million years getting out of that rental car of
you know, my ex trying to drive in Scotland did
I think. Oh, in let's see how in four years
I'm going to be here with my boyfriend? Right? Can
(02:54):
we go back to that? I'm so sorry with the
most you've been to Scotland before. But boyfriend, is this
why we have a uh picture? Yeah, that hand holding official.
I can appreciate the protection that we have given this
gentleman as he is dapper and sweet and goodhearted. He's
(03:15):
a national treasure over there, he's a sweetheart. And yeah, nos, yeah,
I I am. I am not single, so and it
is one that official. Yes, I mean, she hadn't even
like hesitate with my boyfriend. But isn't that weird though?
Like have you ever had those moments? I mean, I'm
(03:36):
sure like in situations where you're like, I'm like, it's
just so funny how the life in the world works.
It's like I never would have I mean to be
back in that spot and and and it's like or
like you know, four years ago to be like, oh, yeah,
I'm gonna be here again with you know, I'm gonna
be divorced and and then I'm gonna come back here
with a boyfriend who grew up here. Yeah, it's just
(03:59):
like I don't know I had just like that moment
driving like this is this is very It's interesting how
the world works. I think it's important for people to
hear that because I've gotten a lot of um. I
get a lot of your people that reach out asking
me about like, you know, because we've talked about divorce
and stuff and then and I always tell them I'm like,
you have to, especially because I've been really passionate about
(04:20):
this little movement I made about one more minute with
battling depression, and I'm like, you just don't even know
all the goodness that is coming to you, like those
dark times you could I mean you, guys, I sat
on the floor in an apartment in Kansas City and
I thought about ending my life and on the other
side of those minutes was two babies and a husband
(04:43):
and love again and and and a lot of bs two.
I'll be honest, Like, our industry is hard, and it's
hard to be married in our industry, but it's also
like there is so much Like when you say, I
get out of a rental car with my boyfriend who
was born in Scotlan, like because you can never you
just don't know. And that's like the fun scavenger hunt
(05:06):
of the way our life works. No, but it's true though,
And I think, like, I mean, we've all been in
those moments and shoot, like however many you know to
two and a half years ago, Like I'm on the ground,
like crying my my eyes out, and like I don't
think anyone's gonna ever love me. And I'm you know,
who who would want to be with me? And I'm um,
you know I'm never gonna find love again. I'm unlovable.
(05:27):
And it's like I think, you know the lesson and
all of this is like that's just not true, Like
you will find love again. And and this my I
don't know if this is my forever person. I've got
some things that maybe one day I'll share if it
comes to fruition. But like you know, it's like I'm
gonna just I'm not going to push away love just
(05:51):
because I've been hurt before. I'm gonna embrace it. I'm
gonna have fun. I'm gonna and if it doesn't work out, well,
you know what, I'm gonna learn a lot of lessons.
And I had a lot of fun on the way.
So's noting to Creamer that you were like for a
long time you were like, no, way would I do
international boyfriend. No. I think it's worth noting that at
(06:13):
some point maybe our own rules are what stand in
the way of us meeting and enjoying another human being,
like the person that you have now as a boyfriend.
I just want to keep saying it, um because once
you decided to, like, let that hurdle not be a hurdle.
Look at you, You're glowing England, I know. I mean
(06:34):
it's truly. I mean I you know, even like when
I was on that app, I was like, no, they
live in a different country, like no, no, no, And
you know, even with him, I said no, Like I
was just like no, I just like this is this
is silly. I'm a mom with two kids and I
live in Nashville, Like this, how would this even work?
And something about him just you know, I was like, Okay,
(06:57):
well let me just see you know, like what what
does a conversation hurt? Right? And you know, now there's
something well I don't want to say too much, but
I it just this just feels different. And again, if
it doesn't work out, and I hate to say that,
but I just I'm realistic to the point where um,
(07:19):
I want people to know that no matter what, like
you will be okay and you won't be alone you
and and to let love in whether you end up
getting hurt or it's here forever. I think that's like
something that I've really realized because again I was so
just like I'm not I'm never going to be loved.
I mean even you know our friends that have gone through,
like we've all felt that way, like we're unlovable and
(07:40):
we're never going to find love. And once I found
peace within myself and not like having to have that,
it's kind of found me. Well, I think you also
believe that no matter what happens with this relationship and
correct me if I'm wrong, that you're okay, yeah, oh yeah,
fine to be fine. You're going to And that's just
(08:03):
so different for you, you know what I mean, And
like you took a lot of work for you to
get there, to truly believe that, And I think, in
my personal opinion, I think that's what made it so
easy for you to jump in, because you actually believe
that this time that and this one's different, Like I'm
not like I would pull so many tactics to like
try to push someone away because I didn't. It's it's
(08:26):
almost like I almost didn't believe that I deserved it.
And also like I just knew they would leave so
or they would end up lying or or doing something
and so but I'm I'm just who I am in
this relationship is who I've always wanted to be and
what I've always like. I always said, like I have
a lot of love to give, and I I like,
(08:48):
I like, I want to give my love to this
and it has a safe place to land this time. Yeah,
and the Hairways is so happy to have you. Well
that's the thing. I'm kind of like, okay, my, in
my back of my mind, I mean, people are like
or you know, like how would this ever work? And
I'm like, I don't know And I'm not even like
putting stress on it because it's just I'm just enjoying
(09:09):
where it's at right now and I'm enjoying feeling this way.
And why I'm out here so soon is because we're
trying not to go more than three weeks that's seeing
each other. So um, yes, it was a week later
I flew out here, but only because I can't come
back for because you know, weekends and Joel's you know,
there's things that I couldn't rearranged, and right now he's
(09:32):
with his job, he can't come, so, um, you know,
I'll have to do more of like the bulk of
the flying and then for the next few months. But
I'm excited about it, and um, you know in three
weeks hopefully I'll be back and yeah, bring him to us.
When does he come to us? Yeah, that's my next question.
I feel like you're keeping him over the pond. Bring
(09:55):
him to meet him? Um, yeah, I mean it just depends,
like with work and stuff, you're just not giving too much,
which I'm like really proud of. But then also the
people want to know Cramer. I'm happy, and I think
that's the that's the piece where I'm just like it
(10:18):
just feels really nice and just yeah, I'm I'm just
I don't want to put too much like pressure on
it and I just want to enjoy enjoy it. Would
you like to give your listeners any hints about this
person or any information at all, like any um for
(10:38):
this is an easter egg. For a long time ago,
Mark had asked or had told me who he thinks
I should end up with. What sport and he's right.
Remember I wish Mark was here. Was good. We need
(10:59):
Mark that was used so if you all want to
go back, you can find it there. Good. I wish
everyone could see the group chat that happens while we're
doing because my heart l A is like, yeah, everyone's
so sweet about it. Yeah Mark, Mark was like, I
would really like to see you be with someone who X,
(11:21):
Y and Z played the plas. Yeah. Now everyone exits
this podcast and goes back to re listen. But yeah,
very happy, Janna, thank you. I'm like, I'm yeah, So
it's gonna be tough. I mean, I've never done long distance,
but again I'm just enjoying being happy and it's all good,
(11:42):
Like there's there's gonna be lessons learned along the way.
I'll learned things out whether it works out or whether
it doesn't. And um, I think that's the piece that
I know either way, Like I'm okay. One thing I love, love,
love about long distance, which I know is like the
double edged sword. But in Preston, I did a lot
of not seeing each other for a really long time
until we saw so much of each other that we
(12:02):
made a million babies. But the you have to have trust.
You build a different level of trust with each other
and a different level of intimacy and intention because you
can't pick each other up for a date night. Yeah,
and anything really cool about that. Yeah, I'll never get
(12:23):
into a situation again where I can't trust someone because
I do not like who I become. Um and so,
but there's something again, something is just very different about
this relationship that I have like zero worries or fear.
So I'm just and if something was to happen again,
I'm like, all right, like thanks for showing me who
you are and I'm out, you know, so and again
(12:46):
I'll find the lessons in it, so Cramer. So but
I'll be how many few days and we'll be together
next week and it'll be great. So and we'll go
from there. But UM, bring him to us, Yeah, hopefully
one day. But we have Dr lakey On. He's a
(13:08):
plastic surgeon, you guys. But he wrote a book which
I think is really cool, Um, basically about loving yourself.
Because he's got m he's got some kids, and so
I think that's going to be interesting. It's called Nobody
Is the Same, a book about body positivity. So we're
going to get him on Chris, and I know you've
wanted some things in the plastic surgery area, um, which
(13:32):
I think you're beautiful. You don't need anything, but I
know how we all look at ourselves and your noses
grow forever. That's all. I just need to talk to
him about a little tiny touch up. Really do your
nose and your ears? I think that's true in your
face drinks. Oh that's when you get like when you
see older people, it's because their face is shrunken him,
but they're not like I didn't know, so maybe that's
(13:55):
why the noses look bigger. I thought, you're we need
to like, yeah, we need a doctor because this is
all misinformation and some call the doctor. All right, let's
get Dr Laky. He is part of the Beverly Hills
Classic Surgeon Dr John Lakey, co founder of Beverly Hills Empty.
(14:27):
Dr Lakey, how are you fantastic? Good morning? Good morning? Um, okay,
I have well, we all have a lot of questions
for you, but I want to talk about your book.
But I first want to talk about can I we
talk about the plastic surgery side of things first of course? Okay,
so what do you specialize in for plastic surgeries. It
(14:49):
is it all surgeries or UM's started off that way,
trained in everything and operating from petatoe and then slowly
found my dich So I'm really neck up my partner's
neck own. So it just makes it easy a combination
of both partners. It makes for a quick recovery. We'll see.
(15:10):
Um Yeah, listen, I just found my my niche. I
really enjoy operating face. I think it's very detailed and uh,
there's a lot of artistry and finesse involved, and so
I just tended to gravitate towards that. Have you found
an increase of UM face classic surgery since filters have
entered Instagram? Definitely? I mean I I think a thousand
(15:33):
percent um The you know, now the interesting part, especially
in Beverly Hills and we get all kinds of requests,
but I have people who flying from all over the
world asking to look like a particular filter. And I
think that with the advent of social media, although it's
amazing for extrapolating data and getting your information as quickly
(15:55):
as possible, I think that our perceptions of what beauty is, um,
you know, what a human should look like is is
drastically changed. I think, you know, some of the concepts
are still there. I mean, they'll will always be prevalent
in society, but now some of the altered uh you know,
facial features based off of a filter. You know, it's
(16:19):
it's amazing to me, so um, you know, and that's
ultimately where I started this, this kind of kind of
this idea. I have three toddlers of my own, and
so um, it's hard being a plastic surgeon and telling them, oh, listen,
you know, you're beautiful the way you are, and as
they grow, it will be more difficult, especially you know
(16:41):
in teen years. I mean I think that, you know,
our perception of our own self and our own self worth,
our own self beauty can greatly influence our mental status.
And so this is how depression and eating disorders and
then anxiety, you know, image disturbances, body dysmorphia, all these
(17:05):
things develop at a relatively young age. And I think
that now watching young teens and preteens stare at their
phones incessantly, um, I think we're gonna be in for
for some trouble. So then are you for having conflict
kind of then in yourself with what you do and
then and then being in the position obviously as a
(17:27):
dad and everything else. You know, the interesting part. I'm
definitely not working myself out of a career. That's you know.
I think there's always a place for even cosmetic surgery.
Definitely reconstructive curcuity, but there's definitely a place for cosmetic surgery.
I think that if you're comfortable in your own skin,
and you have tried to do something to better yourself,
(17:50):
and there's one thing that bothers you, and and everybody has.
I mean, we have supermodels that come in and say
this really bothers me, and you'll stare at and then
think I don't and understand. But you know, everybody has
that within themselves. And um, you know, for the sixteen
year old that's getting bullied because you know, her nose
is cricket or too large, or um, you know, for
(18:14):
the the boy who's trying to play sports you can't
breathe or you know. I think that there's always going
to be a place for a plastic reconstructive surgery. UM.
I just think that the trends are going so far
off the track that you know it frankly, you know,
(18:36):
I think some of it is becoming ridiculous. Well, I'll,
I mean, I'll call myself out where you know. I
remember I was I was waitressing justin Los Angeles. I
was nineteen years old and I was waitressing at this um.
I was doing like this red bull thing at this
plastic surgeon's house, and I said, if there's one thing
you could do to my face, what would you do?
(18:57):
And he goes your nose. And ever since then, I've
been so self conscious of my nose. Even so Katherine's
at the top, there's also my managers. I'm always like,
oh no, I hate that picture. My nose looks big,
and my nose looks big, and so since these filters,
I'm like, I have this one and I go, oh wow,
I like my nose better in this filter, and so
it's hard for me. But I'm like, but that's so
(19:19):
awful that I'm like wanting to use this filter because
I like the way my nose looks better in it.
But then when I turn it off the filter, I'm like, oh,
and then I don't like myself, and then I'm then
I'm just like I throw my phone because I'm like,
this is I get like insecure, and I'm like this
is ridiculous, yes, which you know and listen, we can't
take a step back and say, you know, that's obviously ridiculous.
(19:40):
You're gorgeous. The thing is even with you know, when
you look at the Halley berries, when you look at
the Jennifer Iniston's where they have subtle fine uh you know,
will say refinements. Um, I don't know that that is
necessarily as bad as you know, trying to create a
(20:02):
tap filter or a you know, the pinched tip. You
know where it's clearly not it looks like more of
an avatar that it does a human. Um. Again, I
think what I enjoy doing is those subtle refinements, making
them look as though you were born with them. And
these aren't things. Again, we all obsessed about tiny little things.
(20:25):
It doesn't mean you don't love yourself, but there are
certain instances where you know you want to improve something,
and that's where you know there is that conflict where
you know, I start off by saying, listen, and this
is the base. You have to love yourself first for
who you are. Then you choose to change something. That's
completely fine. If it's to the point where your reclusive
(20:49):
because someone has commented or bullied or you know, made
reference to something that you thought was normal until someone
brought it up. It's a different ball game. And I
think that as a society as a whole, you know,
if we approach there wouldn't be such animosity, would be
such a divide, There wouldn't, you know, be such stratification
(21:12):
if everybody was as accepting. It doesn't mean you can't
change something about yourself. I mean, because that's more of
a personal decision. It's not that society is making. Yeah,
I mean, I got a blue job the last year
and it was one of the best things. I love it. Like,
I'm just like, this is It's not that I didn't
like my body. It is just but now I'm like,
(21:32):
I'm more confident and definitely you fill out clothing you
it's a complete different mentality. So again, there's nothing wrong
with that. That's never what I'm going to say because
that's the job. But I do think that if it
was that someone had told you, look, you know, you're pretty,
but if you really were a sea cup or higher,
(21:56):
you'd be a lot prettier. The idea is, you know, again,
when we focus on something that we want to improve,
in ourselves full different ball game with society is pressured, right,
I mean, Kristen, you kind of um talked about wanting
to do things and what if love comes to you
(22:17):
and says like, I know when Julie she asked me,
I'm obviously like, hey, when you're older and those are
those are your choices. But I mean, is that like,
how would you like where's your stance on that? Well?
This is what's tricky for me because I've always it's
interesting that he talks about I just really, first of all,
I really enjoy your perspective on this a lot because
it is about loving yourself first. And I just turned
(22:39):
forty one a couple of days ago. I really like,
thank you, capricordination. I really really I love myself. I
think I'm a wonderful human. Took a lot of work,
um to say that. But I have always wanted my
nose done. I can't even tell you. I would say
that it stems from here's a quick funny story. My
(23:01):
mom had a dream when she was pregnant with me
that she gave birth to a nose. And that is
because my mom and my dad have these like huge noses.
When my dad passed a year ago and I have
since gone like, well, gosh, if I changed too much
about my face, then he's, you know, like part of
that is so it's your lineage too. And recently went
(23:21):
over to London into France and we have some French
in us too, and I thought, well, man, that's what
makes us us. You know. I feel like we're such
a copy paste society here that it sometimes makes me
sad because we're losing all these really beautiful, ethnic, wonderful
parts of our lineage by the way we're changing all
that to say, I do get injections. I love botox.
(23:42):
I can't get enough. Um amen, sister, I mean nothing.
A lip never hurt anybody. Listen, there's nothing wrong with
slowing down the aging process. And you know the funny
part is my specialty is really brand and plastic facelik.
So this is all I do all the long. The
idea is this that, um, you know, obviously, when we
(24:05):
look at someone are our brain takes the better half
and naturally replicates it. And that's why the common phrase
they look better in person. Most people hate themselves and
photos because it doesn't do that. When you look at
the nose it's a secondary characteristic, believe it or not.
And that's why when you wear a mask, all your
friends and family know exactly who you are because they
see this. Um you know, and as a society, I
(24:26):
think that will always be prevalent. U making minor changes
does not change your ethnicity, does not change your personality.
That it may give you some more confidence and undeniably
there's no reason for it. But UM, I think the
(24:47):
when we start as a whole and say, look, you're
fine if you do, you're fine if you don't, that's
a different ball game. I think right now society is
saying this is what has beautiful. Uh, put this filter
on to make yourself more beautiful. And that's where we're
kind of, you know again, running off that track. And uh,
(25:10):
I will never ever say if there's anything wrong with
if you say, look, I just want to change my
nose a little bit or do by all means, that's
that is what I do. That's my job. But the
when I look at some of these little kids, and
even I see five or six year olds, they point
things out and say, why, you know, why is that
(25:33):
person like that or why you know? I think teaching
them early that we're all different, we're all unique, and
we're all special, we're all beautiful. Uh. It gives you
that confidence. So then when we get into our teenage years,
no one is really You don't see that group off
in the corner that doesn't talk to anyone because they're
(25:53):
you know, they've been shamed so much that they can't
express their feelings or personality. Um, you know, we have
less mental health issues, I believe as a result of that.
And so once we can make it past those teen years,
you know, the world's royster. You can now it's a
different mentality, and so you know, you can change anything
(26:17):
about yourself. It's for yourself. And I think you know,
as an example, we'll have patients that come in and
the husband or wife is saying, Okay, he needs this
or she needs this, this, this, this this, and you're
looking at them thinking, uh, you know, I'm gonna let
them talk for a second just so they can tell
me what they true want, because um, you know it
(26:39):
just puts a bad taste. Well, yeah, they also need
a lawyer work. Returning would be wonderful. And everything that
I wanted to do is truly just for myself. The
nose wouldn't be a new nose. I don't ever want
to look like a different person. I just want to
look I want to look like maybe I didn't make
up a little different. And I think that's exactly you know,
(27:00):
it's you know, well, it's a permanent confluence. How old
are your kids. I have twin boys that are six
and a half and I have a little religious from five. Yeah,
with our daughters, um Jana and I have talked about
this a lot too, because like, I never want to
not look like my kids either, and I've done a
(27:20):
really good job of dominating the gene pool, and so
they look a lot like me. And I'm like, well,
I never want us to look not like we're related.
So I think that's also really important too, and I
would I'd have to be really careful about how I
approached it. I think your view on everything is so
beautiful and wonderful, though, because it is a little bit frustrating.
We live in this society where everything is so copy paste.
(27:42):
I mean, I have like a trainer, I'm working now,
I can't get my butt any higher, I can't get
my hips anything, And then you find out all these
cheats that everyone's doing and you're like, well, this is
apples and oranges. This isn't fair. I'm pretty open about
the injectables and stuff like that online just because I
do think. You know, I've got girls in my hometown going, oh,
well you never age, and I'm like, listen, you can
(28:03):
be a bedroom a button too. You just have to
find the right person. Yes, I mean, cat, you're I
mean I as an older even you've obviously got a
little bit older of kids too. It's so I mean,
you have to probably see that in the social media
aspect and that's probably got to, you know, be really challenging.
And I'm gonna be leaning on you too as my girls,
you know, as Jolie gets older, and it's so hard.
(28:26):
So I have an eleven year old and I've actually
been dealing with this because she does have a phone.
She did have social media, but she currently does not,
because you know, I was going through because I go
through her phone all the time, and it's like they're
literally talking about you want to curvey your girl. I'm like,
you were eleven years old. When I was little, everyone
(28:46):
wanted to be skinny. Like she's skinny, she's beautiful, she's
I mean all the things and it's like that you
just boys want curvy your girls and girls that I
was just like, what is happening? Like it's it's scary
because it starts early. Yeah, the introduction is so much younger,
and uh, you know, concepts are changing. Listen, if you
look at most schools, you know, unfortunate enough for my
(29:09):
kids are in private school, but still the concepts that
are introduced there, I think, are you know, they're they're
fairly young for all of these things. But that's the
way you know, society is going. I think, you know,
we have more information, more education, more you know, it's
kind of drinking out of a fire hydrant as opposed
to you know, a water found and um, that's you know,
(29:34):
it's inevitable, and I think there has to be a
way to teach it the right way. Um, Otherwise, you know,
we're going to run into the same concepts over and
over and over. And I think as society we're doing that.
We're slowly going down that path. It's repeated, repetitive. You know. Um,
we were as a whole, we're looking for change, but
(29:56):
we're doing the same things. And I think that this
is one way of trying to introduce the concept early
and you know, whether it works or not, we'll we'll
definitely see. So with your with your children's book that
you wrote, I mean, I love, I love the whole
concept of it, obviously self love. Can you just give
(30:16):
like a an overview of about the book and and
obviously I'm gonna get it to read my girl every
single night so she knows, you know what, I'll send
it to you. Oh support, we support here, thank you. Um,
you know, so the book Body Positivity ultimately is nobody
is the same, and so it introduces several little kids
(30:40):
that all have our different shapes, sizes, ethnicities, and the
ultimate goal at the end is to teach that, um,
you know, we're all unique, we're all special, and we're
all beautiful. And usually people who are bullies have something
going on in their own lives, so we even have
to turn around and offer compassion and so, uh, you know, ultimately,
(31:02):
the end of the book is that you know, we're
all special, we're all unique, and that we should embrace that. Um.
It's interesting because I have two books in the work
and it works. And really these are three things that
I really tried doing with you know, my wife and
I do with our kids, and um, the other two are.
You know, being a gentleman isn't easy, and being a
(31:24):
lady isn't easy. You know, we're reintroducing some older or
ancient concepts, but it's what we do. You know. My
wife's a Texan. Our kids say yes, certa, yes, ma'am. Um,
you know, and and we expect. You know, it's not
emotional maturity, but it's um you know, obedience, you know,
(31:49):
being respectful. Um, you know things like that. So I
forget I would just put it into book form. Well
you're a Midwest guy that, yes, I was. I loved
that Girls minus Cats A Southerner, but Michigan girls good stock,
(32:09):
right there, hard workers, our listeners find you and the book. Um,
so you can order the book on Amazon. The publishing
company is called p D i C. Puppy Dogs and
ice Cream, and uh, you know you can always find
it via our website, which is Beverly Hills Plastic Surgery
(32:33):
Group dot com. You know, I think it's it's again,
it's kind of an oxyb. We're putting these two together.
But if you if you peel back a few the layers,
it's it isn't it's conngruent with my philosophy and the
way I practice plastic surgery. I love that. Well, thank
you for coming out on wind down and maybe I
(32:54):
see in Los Angeles anytimes. Listen. I would love to
to have you, so uh, definitely definitely stopped by when
you're in Oh, I'm stopping by. Look for my chart doctor,
I will, I will take care. I have a great
rest of your week. We get all right. Hey, I'm
(33:23):
Lance Bass, host of the new I Heart podcast Frosted
Tips with Lance Bass. The hardest thing could be knowing
who to turn to when questions arise, or times get tough,
or you're at the end of the road. Okay, I
see what you're doing. Do you ever think to yourself,
what advice would Lance Bass and my favorite boy bands
give me in this situation? If you do, you've come
to the right place because I'm here to help this.
(33:44):
I promise you seriously, I swear, and you won't have
to send an S O S because I'll be there
for you, and so will my husband Michael. Hey, that's me. Yeah,
we know that. Michael and a different hot sexy teen
crush boy bander each week to I do through life
step by step, not another one. Kids, relationships, life in
(34:05):
general can get messy. You may be thinking, this is
the story of my life. Just stop now. If so,
tell everybody, yeah, everybody about my new podcast, and make
sure to listen so we'll never ever have to say
bye bye bye. Listen to Frosted Tips with a Lance
Bass on the I Heart Radio app, Apple podcast or
wherever you listen to podcasts. All right, he was great.
(34:30):
I love you can't wait. I can't I can't even imagine, Like,
you literally have the body I would want, like the
perfect body, and they're over here going you all just
want curbing on. They want the Kardashians, Like that's what's
in everyone's mind now, and that's not even real. That's
not like they have plants and they have things to
(34:51):
take and I'm like, uh, but yeah, we're talking a
lot about that. It's interesting because I was so only
you know, her birthday is coming up this month and
she has been asking for a phone, and I'm like,
baby girl, you are seven, like and so, but in
my mind I'm like, well, like, maybe I can just
(35:11):
get her a phone to like just make so that
way I don't have to always communicate with my ax.
I can just be like I can just call her,
she can call her dad when you know, when she's
with me. And but I'm like, I don't even want
her to have access to I mean, obviously I would
not have her have anything on there ever, you know
what I mean, like until she's thirty. But like I
(35:33):
still like, I don't even want her to have a
phone in her hand because I feel like it's just well,
first of all, suggestion I'm getting RANDI like the gizmo
watch so I can call, you know, they can call
on their watch and they can do all that. I'm
actually getting her that today. But also like I did
it too early with any I will own that. I
(35:54):
will be the first to say with you know, we
were at cheer comps and I wanted to be able
to under I want if I lost her, Like there
were reasons I did it, but I did it too early.
How old? How old was she she was? She had
an iPod, which is basically kind of what you're saying
where they can just do a few things on it
at eight. Okay, she started cheering when she was five.
(36:16):
It was too early. I shouldn't have done it. And
then I think nine. I think I got her a
phone and had a letter her on social media then,
and I let her on social media too early too.
I mean, I will own all of that. I watch
all of it, so in my mind, it's like I'm
keeping an eye on it, which is better than a lot.
I'm learning a lot of people don't keep an eye
on anything. Um. But you know, it's just this fifth
(36:37):
grade year, y'all. They start like, you know, it's everything
we were talking about probably and bickering about and talking
about at school or on the weekends, but now it's
on the phone. We also went as inundated, like we
didn't have you know, I remember watching like there was
some study because I went to school for marketing communication.
(36:58):
I remember there was some study that showed us the
amount of ads or the amount of images we saw
train the perfect body image by the time we had
a certain age. And I can't remember any of that
because I don't remember anything anymore because I have mom dementia.
But I remember being an astronomical amount. And that was
before social media came. So now we are like these
girls are, I mean everywhere that they are, even if
(37:22):
they're not on social media, their friends are even if
they don't have a phone, their friends do and they're
sending that's the thing. Like she has several friends, well,
I'd say maybe a few friends that didn't have a
phone until like now or whatever. There I mean, there's
a group chat kids on it. I'm just like, you
were opening yourself up. Because then people start not necessarily bullying.
(37:42):
I won't say I've seen actual like bullying, but they
start kind of being you know, like it's not okay,
but like we all did it, you know, kind of
in our like kind of being mean to that person
or that person in a way. Maybe we didn't all
do it, but we all had our But it's now
it's it's on text message. I'm like so and says
can screenshot that and in it, and so it's like
you have to understand what you're putting in writing also
(38:03):
can live with you for the rest of your life,
you know. So it's just there's so many lessons, there's
so many things in it, and I hate for them
to feel out of the loop. Like if I took
her phone away right now, it would definitely change her
dynamic good or bad. You know. I mean, everyone communicates
on on there um, but I don't know. Had she
(38:28):
not had one, I don't know, maybe it wouldn't. I
don't know. It's hard. It's so hard. I don't even
That's the thing. That's that's where I'm like struggling because
I'm like, all right, she'll get made fun of if
she doesn't so then she'll have a hard time in school.
And if she does have it, then there's issues there.
And it's like I'm thinking back to like, you know,
even in middle school. Yeah, middle school's tough. High school
(38:48):
there was some like you know, I remember, I remember
there was like this um uh powder puff football thing
and that there was like this list of the hit
that the people I wanted to make sure they hit
and I was on that list, and I was like, so,
um that was that was I mean, I remember that.
(39:11):
But I just look, I can't imagine having social media,
and it's like a part of me is like I
don't even want July to ever have that. But an
at the same time, it's it's like I wish social
media wasn't for comparison and you know, being being nasty
because the comments that people say. I mean, I've now
developed at least thick enough skin. It still hurts to
(39:34):
read negative comments. I mean, we don't like it. You know,
they said things about all of us and it's not nice.
And it's like to have your daughter, our daughter, my daughter,
or my son read those things about themselves and then
you know the everything else that kids talk about that's
scary and I'm just like, oh, I just that piece
of parenting. I'm like, I don't even know what. I
don't know, I don't know what to do, like, and
(39:56):
I haven't really dealt with like the negative comments on
social media yet. I watch it so closely that like,
you know, she hasn't been like attacked or bullied on
social media yet. But what I'm testing and really paying
attention to. It's kind of Christien what you said, because
they're just scrolling, They're just watching video after video after video,
and I'm like, what are they saying? What's getting in
(40:18):
their head to cause them to talk and think the
way that they are. That's kind of where I'm at. More.
I think once they get middle school, high school, they
start bullying more on social media. For sure. We have
friends of ours that have um, she thought she was
and this is, like I would say, more so just
a heads up, and I'm sure there's people listening that
would already know this, but I was like, I don't
(40:41):
know why it shocked me. But we had friends of
ours who have a high schooler and she was like, oh,
I'm on, I follow her and she always has this
like wonderful content and she's so cute and the people
that follow her suite and blah lah lah. And then
she finds out there's another account. Oh yeah, and so
then she's like, well, I don't have I don't have
(41:02):
access to that account of my daughters and then that account.
I mean, I've got to be honest, it's scary to
me how these girls are dressing. It's scary to me
they're learning it also innocently, truly, because it's just all
around them, like the sexy, the crop tops. It's what
I'm wearing a top top right now. And I feel
like a bad mom when I wear because because I'm like,
(41:22):
what am I showing? Then I'm what am I showing
my daughter? It's it's a hard my boobs are out.
I'm like, it gets harder as that gets older, to
be like, hey, you can't wear that if you're wearing
it like I do. Think that that can get but
it's also kind of like there's a lot of things
I can't do I can do, so it's kind of like,
I don't know, it's a hard I think we just
have to say slow and steady and just really aware
(41:45):
and real open. I think the conversation, I mean, listen,
Jane and I have our oldest love is seven today,
So it's not like I'm not I just it overwhelms
me so much. Everyone's like, oh, I can't wait till
my kids are older and they can do this and
they can do that, and I am like, freeze time please,
because everything you're talking about overwhelms me so much it
(42:05):
makes my throat close. I think you just have to
be slow and steady, good mom friends, friends that have
gone before us, the moms that know the tricks and
the apps and the things they can watch for. I
think that as long as you're paying attention and you're aware,
you're already leaps and bounds above ahead of everybody else.
And I hate to say that, but I've been disappointed
and shocked to see how many people don't pay attention.
(42:27):
M Yeah, and I like and I like you. You
said to Chris leaning on like it's a you know,
Catherine will be leaning on you heavily for you know,
things that you know, because obviously you've got an older daughter.
So I mean, I love the gizmo gizmo watch idea
versus you know, the other thing. And yeah, and I
think something I try to do too, Like every morning
(42:48):
and night, I'm always just like trying to reaffirm like
you're beautiful, You're enough, and just ingraining that in her
brain because I'm like, this was the pivotal six was
my childhood trauma age where I didn't feel good enough
and I felt like you know, so it's like I'm
I'm like, all right, this is this These are the
years that I have to really do everything that I
can do to like ingrain that she's like pretty and
(43:10):
beautiful and kind and nice and like enough. And yeah,
I know we all take the head. I know, it's
just because it's just scary and we have someone in
my family who you know, obviously I won't I won't say,
but like she's she's in high school and you know,
even just like I don't want to live and it's
(43:33):
just like you're in high school and it's just it's
just it's just it's just sad, and I just wish,
like first, like I I love, I obviously use social
media as a as a marketing tool and as an
income for my family, so that you know, I'm I'm
grateful for social media and what it's done for for
you know, for um supporting my family. And I also
(43:56):
love that we can reach out to people and um
kind of of do this together. But the negative, the
negative side of social media, it's like, I don't know,
it's like I hate for it to go away, but
I just I don't want. I don't like the negative
side of it. As a girl who had a back
brace and hailer in seventh grade, I'm so glad social
(44:16):
media did not exist. I cannot imagine. I mean, I
know the things that were said about me just from
what I heard. Imagine that's the thing you get behind me,
and uh huh, that's really scary to me. And we
have to protect our little people because it's not even
about like we try to anchor in a little bit
(44:38):
here like what God says about you, what mom and
dad say about you, what you know, like just so
that it's built so sturdy that you hope that that
first like punch or hit or like the first trauma
Jenna is talking about like doesn't destroy them and but
at all. I mean you guys, we both all three
of us, know, you collect those little tidbits over life,
tiny little chip aways, and then before you know it,
(45:00):
you're talking to Dr Lakey about getting a nose job
on a podcast that reaches everyone in I heart. You know,
like what do you I mean, it's just I think
too something that you know, just a call out for
people that are listening, because I know there are the
Reddit trolls that come on and listen just to tear
us down and to say mean comments. So you know,
(45:22):
for those people and that want to go and comment,
just remember that we're all human, we all have feelings,
we all like it's so much easier to be kind
because you don't know what people are going through, You
don't know what they've gone through, what they're going to
go through, and it's like it's just it's so much
easier to just be kind, Like there's no like why
(45:44):
be hateful or hurtful or leave negative comments or be
nasty to someone or say like oh she's got this
or that's you know, she's fat she's too thin, or
she's got a big mess, like just be nice, Like,
I don't understand why you have to be mean because
have feelings. I would challenge the people that feel the
need to comment to take before you hit the first
(46:07):
key in your negative comment about someone that you don't know.
I would just challenge you to take a look inward
to see what it is about yourself that you dislike
that is making you feel the way you feel to
reach out and be hateful to someone, because I think
that's the pause that society is missing. It feels to
me like we're so quick to judge and to listen.
(46:29):
I've been that person too. I've never really been a
mean girl. I don't think. I'm sure there's someone listening
that's like out beg to differ, but I wasn't. I
was mean girl a lot, and I just look back
and I'm like, listen, I don't know. I can't say
her name, although it's it's literally like podcast gold if
you could know her real name, because it's two first names,
(46:50):
and I refer to her as the girl with two
first names. But the girl with two first names probably
actually had a lot going on at home in high
school and I didn't know that, but I you know,
at that age, you're not like, you can't really think
that way. So I just I would just challenge, before
you start to type, take two seconds and wonder about
what it is about yourself or your story, or your
(47:12):
baggage or your hurt or whatever that makes you feel
like you want to attack someone like us for instance,
or anybody. Yeah, but I love you girls, and we'll
be back next week together
Host
Jana Kramer
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