The Happiest Lives Podcast

This is Part Three in our series Why We Keep Missing Each Other: Attunement and Why It Matters.

In this episode, we slow down and look underneath our reactions to understand what’s really happening when connection feels shaky. We talk about attunement, attachment styles, nervous systems, and why emotional responses can feel so automatic—even when we know better.

We explore why attachment styles aren’t diagnoses or signs that somethin...

This is part 2 in the series Why We Keep Missing Each Other (Attunement & Why It Matters).  When connection starts to feel uncertain, most of us don’t just sit with that discomfort—we move. We either push for closeness or pull away from it.

In this episode, we name what push and pull actually look like in real relationships—not as personality flaws or problems to fix, but as understandable responses to uncertainty. We talk about...

Why does connection break down even when there’s love, effort, and commitment?

In this first episode of a brand-new series, Why We Keep Missing Each Other, we’re talking about emotional attunement—what it is, why it matters so much, and why missing it hurts more than we expect.

This episode lays the foundation for the series. We explore why connection doesn’t stay steady just because people care or are trying, how...

*Get your free guide, 3 Ways of Relating When Love Feels Uncertain at www.myhappyvault.com/uncertain

Love doesn’t usually show up when it’s convenient.

More often, it interrupts us—our plans, our preferences, our comfort.

In this final episode of the series How to Love Without Losing Your Real Self, we explore what it looks like to love well in the ordinary moments where life asks us to pause, adjust, and trust God with what feels cos...

*Get your free guide, 3 Ways of Relating When Love Feels Uncertain at www.myhappyvault.com/uncertain

This is part three of the series, Loving Without Losing Your Real Self.

In today’s episode of The Happiest Lives Podcast, I’m talking with Julie Perkin Stout Davenport, author of Secrets in the Sanctuary.

Julie was my pastor’s wife when I was in high school, and I watched her walk through betrayal in her marriage.

In this conversation, ...

*Get your free guide, 3 Ways of Relating When Love Feels Uncertain at www.myhappyvault.com/uncertain

In part two of our series, Loving Without Losing Your Real Self, we look at a pattern many of us fall into without noticing: serving from a place of fear, pressure, or over-responsibility. On the outside, it looks like love… but inside, it feels heavy and resentful.

In this episode, we explore the difference between ministering (showi...

This is Episode One in a brand-new series called Loving Without Losing Your Real Self — a series all about learning how to love the people in your life without disappearing, over-functioning, or drifting into resentment.

And today, we’re starting with something almost every woman has felt:

when a relationship feels lopsided.

Maybe you’re the one who initiates.

Maybe you carry the emotional weight.

Maybe you’re always the one reaching ou...

*Grab your FREE Heart Scan printable at myhappyvault.com/heartscan, and listen in as we close this series with hope.

We’re wrapping up our Happiness & Unhappiness- Finding Jesus In The 50/50 series by stepping into the part we tend to avoid—how God uses unhappiness to shape us. If you’ve ever wondered why certain seasons feel so heavy or why your emotions seem “off,” this episode will help you see those moments through a complet...

* Make sure you grab your FREE Printable The Heart Scan Framework to tuck in your Bible or journal at www.myhappyvault.com/heartscan.

In part three of Happiness & Unhappiness: Finding Jesus in the 50/50, we’re talking about emotional courage—the strength to face what we feel instead of running from it.

Most of us aren’t actually afraid of the emotion; we’re afraid of the story our mind attaches to it. In this episode, Jill unpack...

This is the second episode in the series Happiness and Unhappiness: Finding Jesus in the 50-50. Life will always hold both joy and sorrow—but happiness doesn’t happen by chance. It’s something we build through habits, perspective, and practices that make room for the Holy Spirit to flow through us.

In this episode, Jill shares the three movements of a happy soul—delight in the Lord, contentment in Christ, and purpose in love. You’ll...

This is the beginning of a new series—Happiness and Unhappiness- Finding Jesus in the 50/50.

Life is both. We often think happiness means the absence of unhappiness, but what if they’re two separate tracks we walk at the same time? In this episode, we’ll talk about how joy and sorrow can coexist, why unhappiness isn’t a sign that something’s gone wrong, and how learning to hold both can lead to a deeper kind of peace.

The 4 Things Yo...

This is the final episode in the series The Listening Life: How to Hear God’s Voice. Over the last few weeks we’ve learned to slow down, turn on the lights, and make space to hear from God. But how do we carry that into the messy middle of our real lives? In this episode, I’ll share how a couple learned to lay down heavy burdens in prayer, how waiting with longing can actually bind our hearts to God, and why faith always shows up i...

Have you ever sat down with God feeling heavy, distracted, or unsure where to start—and walked away renewed? In this episode, I share exactly what happened during a 45-minute meeting with the Holy Spirit. I came with aches, longings, and discouragement, but God met me with truth, shifted my perspective, and reminded me that what feels dormant is not dead.

We’ll talk about why we resist honesty, how repentance is really about redirec...

Have you ever sat down for quiet time and walked away feeling like you just checked a box — but didn’t really connect with God? You’re not alone.

In this episode of The Happiest Lives Podcast, I share a practical, 45-minute structure you can use to turn your quiet time into an intentional meeting with the Holy Spirit. This simple nine-step rhythm will help you worship, process your thoughts, engage with Scripture, and walk away with...

Have you ever wondered if you’re really hearing God’s voice—or just your own thoughts? In this first episode of The Listening Life series, Jill Lillard unpacks what it means to live attuned to God’s presence and guided by His Spirit. Through the “one thing” thread woven across Scripture—David’s desire for God’s presence, Mary’s attentiveness, the rich young ruler’s call to surrender, and Paul’s focus—you’ll see how the listening li...

This is the final episode in the series Truth in Love: The Courage to Correct and Be Corrected.

Over the past five weeks, we’ve looked at what it means to offer correction in a way that reflects the heart of God—truthful, loving, and wise. But today we’re flipping the perspective. What does it look like to receive correction without spiraling into shame, defensiveness, or fear?

In this episode, Jill unpacks what Scripture says about ...

This is part four in the series Truth in Love: The Courage to Correct and Be Corrected.

Correction isn’t easy—and when we step into it, it’s tempting to slip into the role of “fixer,” as if it’s our job to make someone else change. But scripture reminds us that’s not our role. We are called to speak the truth in love, with gentleness and humility, while entrusting the outcome to God.

In this episode, Jill unpacks:

• Why posture matt...

This is the third episode in the series Truth in Love: The Courage to Correct and Be Corrected.

In this conversation, Jill explores one of the most important skills for healthy, godly relationships: discernment. How do you know when to speak up and when to let love quietly cover an offense? Both can be acts of love. Both can protect trust. Both can honor God. But knowing which response to choose in the moment takes wisdom.

Drawing fr...

This is Part Two of the series Truth in Love: The Courage to Correct and Be Corrected.

When you see something that feels wrong, do you speak up—or stay silent? In this episode, we ask: Who am I to say something?

We’ll explore why correction matters, what it can look like in everyday life, and the real reasons we often hold back—fear of man, not wanting to seem judgmental, cultural individualism, misguided views of grace, and the disc...