Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
Time now for today's Strawberry Letter, and if you need
advice on relationships, sex, dating, work, parenting, and more, please
submit your Strawberry letter to STEVEHARBFM dot com and click
submit Strawberry Letter, because why we could be reading your
letter live on the air, just like we're going to
read this one right here, right now, and you never know,
it could be yours. And we're looking for those follow
(00:21):
ups too, if this situation has been resolved or there's
more to the story.
Speaker 2 (00:27):
Whatever.
Speaker 3 (00:29):
We went to jail after all, and it is talk
a lot, but hold on tight, we gotta fight here.
Speaker 2 (00:33):
It is Strawberry letter, all right.
Speaker 1 (00:35):
Nevvi you thank you subject my ex paigde for my
grandma's funeral. Here Stephen Shirley, I am engaged to a
man that I work with. We both teach elementary school
and when he transferred to my school, it was love
at first sight for me at a time I had
only been divorced a few months and my ex husband
was still pursuing me and trying to work things out.
(00:56):
He cheated on me more than a few times, and
when we were married, so I divorced him. He didn't
contest anything, and I got whatever I asked for because
he is still in love with me. I have our
family home sitting on three acres, and he let me
have both our dogs. I lost respect for him every
time I heard a rumor of him cheating, and I'm
(01:18):
much happier divorced.
Speaker 2 (01:19):
Now.
Speaker 1 (01:20):
Fast forward to when I met my fiance and we
became inseparable in no time. My ex husband was overbearing
and used his money to try to lure me back in.
He bought me a range Rover last year for my birthday,
and I could not tell my fiance this, so the
car is still at my ex's house. When we first
got engaged, I was honest with my fiance about my
(01:41):
ex's extravagant gifts so he wouldn't find out later and
be upset. He told me that I do not set
boundaries with my ex. Because I liked the attention. I
told him I would do better. Then, my grandma died.
She and my ex husband were very close, so I
knew he'd be at the funeral. Fiance and my fiance
(02:01):
and I went to her funeral, and as soon as
a service came to an end, my grandfather stood up
and thanked my ex husband for paying for everything. My
fiance was furious, so we skipped the repast. I tried
to control the situation by calling my ex and telling
him to stop coming around my family. My fiance told
me that we're going to pay my ex husband back
(02:23):
for the funeral. Is my fiance crazy?
Speaker 2 (02:26):
Why does it matter who paid for it?
Speaker 1 (02:28):
Well, you know what, I kind of think this is
a problem that doesn't have to be. I mean, you
have two men who are fighting over you and fighting
for your attention. Really, but your ex if you're divorced,
I mean, he needs to let go. If he was
married to you and had you and then he started cheating,
you know that's on him. You clearly have moved on
(02:49):
and he should too. It's too late for him now.
When he was married to you, Like I said, he
blew it. He lost in this situation, he's not dealing
with reality. He's in denial. I think right now he
created this problem. I do think your fiance was out
of line making you miss your grandmother's repast. He was
in his feelings looking at this situation to me all
(03:10):
the way wrong. I'm with you on this one. What
difference does it make who pays for the funeral. You
can't control what your ex does. And you said that
he and your grandmother were very close, and apparently your
grandfather appreciated it. I think it's stupid to spend money
to pay your ex back. That's just stupid to me.
Your fiance shouldn't be trying to prove anything, not to you,
(03:32):
not to him. He's saying he's going to pay your
ex back. I think that's just his ego getting in
a way. Funerals are not cheap, okay, So you know
you could spend that money on something else. He doesn't
have to flex your new fiance. He's already got the
prize and the prizes you as far as the cargoes,
just let us stay where it is and your ex's garage.
(03:53):
And I say, go on and live your life with
your fiance and don't let your ex get in the
way of your happiness.
Speaker 2 (04:00):
Steve, surely, Yes, it's a man problem right here.
Speaker 3 (04:04):
Go.
Speaker 1 (04:05):
I know, I don't worry about it.
Speaker 2 (04:08):
It's a lot of man law in here.
Speaker 3 (04:10):
There's a lot of codes in here, a lot of
egos in here, a lot of flexing in here. There's
some power struggle in here, and it's some ud trying
to stand up and do some pushback. It's all of this,
but all this is man problem because the woman in
(04:31):
this letter is one hundred percent correct and perfect. I
see no flaw in this woman right here. I really don't.
I'm engaged to a man that I work with. We
both teach elementary school, and when he transferred to my
school and was loved at first sight for me.
Speaker 2 (04:44):
At the time, I had only been divorced a few months.
Speaker 3 (04:47):
What happens is when people get divorced, they don't know
where love gonna come along. So anybody walk through the
door and looked like Lord right away. This happens to be.
Speaker 2 (04:54):
The real go He cheated on me.
Speaker 3 (04:59):
Excuse me, only been divorced a few months and the
ex husband was still pursuing me. This is important information
trying to work things out.
Speaker 2 (05:08):
He cheated on me more.
Speaker 3 (05:09):
Than a few times when we were married, so I
divorced him. He didn't contest anything, and I got whatever
I asked for because he's still in love with me.
Speaker 2 (05:20):
This is a love story gone bad, y'all. This is
a man.
Speaker 3 (05:26):
Who has lost the best thing ever happened to him,
and he wanted back.
Speaker 2 (05:32):
I ain't mad at him.
Speaker 3 (05:33):
Now we have a problem because he gave you your
family home sitting on three acres, and he let me
have both our dogs. I lost respect for him every
time I heard a room of him cheating, and I'm
much happier divorced. Well, you sound like it, and you
need to keep that in mind. Fast forward through when
I met my fiance. We became in super Bowl in
(05:56):
no time. Now. My ex husband was overbearing and you
his money to try to lure me back in.
Speaker 2 (06:03):
That's what's fault.
Speaker 3 (06:06):
Uh uh, that's what men become powerful to use a power.
Speaker 2 (06:11):
What good power?
Speaker 3 (06:12):
If you don't wield it, you gotta wield it. He
brought me a range Rover last year for my birthday
and I could not tell my fiance this, so the
car is still at my ex his house. You a
good woman. You are a good woman. I told you,
I can't find no fault in this lady. Right here,
you left that range row. He ain't many women gonna
(06:33):
lead that range rover, that driveway, got that right, But
you did it to keep the peace, and I admire you.
Speaker 1 (06:40):
All right, we'll have part two of your response coming
up at twenty three minutes after the our subject of
today's Strawberry Letter my ex paid for my grandma's funeral.
We'll get back into it right after this. You're listening
Steve Hardy Morning Show. All right, Come on, Steve, let's
recap today's Strawberry letter. The subject my ex paid for
my grandma's.
Speaker 3 (07:00):
We ain't got to that part yet, but we're dealing
with some man stuff here. This is man, law man,
cold man, flexing, power, struggles, all this here, self esteem,
This is all this in this letter. Now, Shirley couldn't
tell you that because she don't know all these man rubers. Now,
what Shirley said was fine, But Shirley, like this woman
in this letter. I can't find no flaw with this
(07:20):
woman in this left because this woman is absolutely doing.
Speaker 2 (07:23):
The right thing.
Speaker 3 (07:26):
She's been divorced. Her husband cheated on him, he ruined it.
She's happy of being divorced without him. She met a
new man at a job. They both elementary school teachers.
This is gonna gonna come into play. He's told the
ex about he's told the fiance about the X and
extravagant gifts.
Speaker 2 (07:47):
Doing the divorce.
Speaker 3 (07:47):
The man gave her everything, the house on three acres,
both the dogs, everything.
Speaker 2 (07:52):
Because he still loved the woman. He messed up. He
trying to get her back.
Speaker 3 (07:57):
She says her ex husband was overbearing and he used
his money to try to lure me back in, as
he should, because that's what is for me. What is
power unless you wielded. I ain't mad at the the
ex husband. So he bought your arrange over last year
(08:17):
from a birthday and you couldn't tell your fiance this.
So the car is still at my ex's house. You're
a smart lady. You're a smart lady. When we first
got engaged at here's a part, I was honest with
my fiancee, who is the school teacher, about my ex
husband's extravagant gifts, so he wouldn't find out later and
(08:40):
be upset. He told me that I do not sound
set boundaries with my ex because I like the attention.
I told him I do better. Well, you know, it's
amazing when people say that you should set boundaries with
another person. You really can't make another person do nothing.
(09:00):
If you could make him do right, he wouldn't. You
wouldn't have that, he wouldn't have been cheating on you
in the first place. You can't make people do stuff,
and it's a little bit unfair of mister school teacher,
sir that you're talking about.
Speaker 2 (09:13):
You don't set no boundaries. She got boundaries.
Speaker 3 (09:16):
She don't take the gifts, but she can't stop everything
because he flexing on you. Dog, you know what this
is now. Then my grandma died. She and my ex
husband were very close, so I knew he'd be at
the funeral. My fiance fiance and I went to her funeral,
and as soon as the service came to an end,
my grandfather stood up and thanked my ex.
Speaker 2 (09:37):
Husband for paying for everything. Okay, that's honorable.
Speaker 3 (09:44):
He thanked another man for stepping up burying his wife,
because that's what me and Douke I think. It was
really admirable of your ex husband. But he's always showing
that he's dead. But he paid for that funeral, so
you could see. He paid for the funeral.
Speaker 2 (10:01):
Because he tried to get you back, so he does.
Speaker 3 (10:03):
Now you don't want the range roller, I'm gonna pay
for your dear grandmother's shooting everything. The grandfather he don't
know what's going on behind the story with y'all, so
he stands up and he thinks the man at the
funeral because he going wild. This boy didn't have to
do this. Now he ain't even date my granddaughter no more.
(10:23):
And that's true. My fiance was furious, so we skipped
the repass.
Speaker 2 (10:30):
He probably won't go over there because that repass.
Speaker 3 (10:32):
I probably that repast was nice because he paid for
the funeral. Oh, they got steaking locks over there. They
got a chef at the repass. Oh it's finna be
balled love. He finish set the repass out. The repass
gonna look like a damn wagon reception. And your boyfriend
knew we cannot go to this repass because hene clowned
(10:55):
over there too.
Speaker 2 (10:56):
I be damn who got this big ass take up
in here? Repay?
Speaker 3 (11:04):
Who in the hell got a chocolate fountain after repays?
Speaker 2 (11:11):
Her ex hul her ex husband flex it.
Speaker 3 (11:16):
Now we got an ego problem because he then told
you don't say boundary.
Speaker 2 (11:21):
He then told you he ain't going to the repass.
Speaker 3 (11:24):
Then you, being a decent lady, you try to control
the situation by calling your ex and telling him to
stop coming around your family. You've done everything you can,
but you ain't gonna stop this grown man because he
trying to get you back. My fiance told me that
we are going to pay my ex husband back for
the funeral? Is my fiance crazy? What doesn't matter who
paid for it? It really shouldn't matter who paid for it.
(11:45):
But see he got your ex making him look bad
as all he thinking.
Speaker 2 (11:50):
Because he a school teacher.
Speaker 3 (11:52):
He couldn't come up with the money for the funeral,
because school teachers are the most underserved, underpaid people and
our community.
Speaker 2 (12:01):
And a great man is he? I bet you he is.
Speaker 3 (12:05):
But that school teacher Saturday got some things going on
that's limiting him to flex.
Speaker 2 (12:10):
It ain't no range rovers, range rover and a funeral.
Speaker 3 (12:15):
Now unless we're gonna put Grandma in the back of
the range rover.
Speaker 2 (12:21):
We got some double some of this up. You know
what stopped the school teacher.
Speaker 3 (12:26):
Now, we don't have to put grandmama in the range
that's gonna be where the funeral at. In the back
of the range rover. That's gonna be to double up
as a casket. And we're gonna have to drive off
into just into the ocean, and just your mama have
an ass c burrier.
Speaker 1 (12:44):
Okay, that's really what she wants to say.
Speaker 2 (12:48):
That's exactly what I wanted to say, really.
Speaker 3 (12:52):
Because there's nothing this school teacher can do with this
man's money. He gonna have to grow up and get
past it. And no, he can't forward to pay this back.
If you pay this back, y'all ain't gonna be able
to get that house or nothing else y'all want.
Speaker 1 (13:05):
All right, Thank you, Steve. Post your comments on today's
Strawberry Letter at Steve Harvey FM on Instagram and Facebook,
and check out the Strawberry Letter podcast on demand you're
listening shoot Steve Harvey Morning Show