Whiskey And Whiskers

A former NHL enforcer lets more hands fly than a rapper on the 4th of July. And he's about to throw your ass in the shit water flood if you don't get the octopi on your team. Grab your 6L of legally distinct off-white Goose beverage and dominate the beach.

The date is July 4th 2053. Zombies have Rhino pills and party with Diddy. The pubes have taken over all of the urinals, but don't worry, we are pissing them away at the Costco bathroom. If you still have all of your fingers, grab a cup of coffee and take a shit at the bank. Not your bank though. Fuck that.

Trump is jacking on Iran, but Kim jong un's golf game is no-cap. Liver king should be investing in DNA, but at what mile marker?

Hey Chat GPT, can you get me all the fights for free, and also door dash me whiskey? Big Foot pizza orders are overloading the AI mainframe. Labubu

Life is short, but dicks are long if you have a big enough kite. When you go to the beach don't catch oral herpes from beer-pong. Especially when you can go fishing in-lieu of rioting. Fuck California.

700 AI MFKRs are paying to pretend to work. Brush, but don''t rinse.

We're holding it in; we're blasting off. Dicks out for Harambe! 

Put away the bluetooth baby-oil, and grab the pre-workout and Icy-Hot, cuz we're breaking the mushroom-simulation and canceling the single-tax. Drink your pussy energy drink, pussy.

Before injecting Butterfly DNA, Check your cybertruck for chechnyian warlords, and opt for the scrotum switch when getting your balls lowered.

When we're fighting gorillas, hopefully we draw the nerd-gorilla. Drink your Gator Smoothies with extra catfood, and you too can beat off in Seattle.

Glizzys subtracting, butt-crack crackin, snot-snake slappin, but the butt-hair slack'n.

Alcoholic slushies on sale for the death-star concert. Robot waitresses are blasting off and slinging sticky on all the fyre festival. I got E.Coli from butthole corn-chips.

Strap on your dragon ballz and unbuckle your seatbelt, cuz when the zombie apocalypse comes, we're taking this truck off Niagra falls. Can I get some extra sour cream please?

The Truck-Nut Episode.

We used to go to porn forts, but now we go to naked boobs.com. alright but check it out, you can order weed with your edible arrangement, and they make socks for all kinds of cocks  #meneither

Big redheads are snortin' sugar off lady liberty's lady lumps. Switch to PE and you'll be flying your Tesla to Ares in no time. 

power rangers are narcs, but when you're out there slappin deities make sure you have a shovel in case there's alligators. 

Boxer briefs are the way to be. When the Tupperware avalanche leads to a laundry strike, you better hope hangin with W doesn't get you microwaved from space. 

Chicken puppies be marrying people. Literally nothing important. But that Zelensky's a bitch.