Text Me Back! With Lindy West And Meagan Hatcher-Mays

Listen, we gatekept just a little 🤏.

We’ve been dimming the full light of this famous episode on the main so that our Patrons could revel in a megawatt jolt of superiority. But it’s time to release the full ep for the masses. And it has nothing to do with the fact that we are on break and don’t have a new episode for you this week, no matter what our Patrons tell you! 

This week’s fan-favorite episode just got a little...

Okay faithful listeners!! DON’T PANIC but this is the last episode before our summer break! We hope you too are preserving your sanity in whatever way you can. But don’t worry! We will still be doing podcast stuff like guesting on other pods, recording with a few fabulous guests for Text Me Back, releasing our free newsletter NEWSLETTER ME BACK, and god forbid taking a few big long naps. And we’ll also give you a few fun t...

First up, Amy Klobuchar…did our BBW invite get lost in the mail? Did we bump our heads and forget that we were honored attendees?? Ames??????

But headlining this episode is a BRAND NEW *I CAN FIX HER* JINGLE!! Thank you listener Krista!!! We simply had to share it and therefore are reporting on that which is fixing us. Namely wax strips and a certain piece of non-religious literature sent by an anonymous Tom ;)

Next, our val...

This week, we’re happy to report that Hat Girl Summer continues with some incredible reporting from the Grace Jones concert that Meagan attended. HAT. She made friends with all the sapphics and twinks so sometimes life is still good??? BTW happy pride, listeners! If you’re reading this you’re officially a little GAY (complimentary!!!!!!!!!!!)

And from there, we get into some classic Pre-Taped Call-In show news where we brea...

This week, Lindy wears a hat!!!!

It’s Hat Girl Summer, and Lindy is patient zero. We know that could be the whole episode, BUT we have business to discuss. We have landed on a name for our $12 Patreon tier. Hint: It’s NOT Big Beautiful Listeners, but you miiiight just see BBL designated to something else in the near future. We love love loved hearing from you all on the Patreon. Never stop pitching us names and your weird l...

Important Mormon intel. A correction re: our innate sense of rhythm. The FaT ShoT DruG (that isn’t working). A new installment of Liam Neeson, Help! Lindy has been TAKEN by a Toxic Man: Debit Card Edition. Plus, our buried headline: Meagan’s Wikifeet. Apparently, Meagan has a robust and active page all to herself, leading Meagan to book the first flight available to space with Gayle and the gang to escape this reality. In ...

We would like to humbly announce that we are ✨ready ✨ to accept that Golden Globe for Podcasting despite them not being particularly interested!!! We won’t let that stop us 💫

This week, we are reaching deep into the mail bag. Strangely, all animal-themed (ani-mail bag??). You know us so well! You know who we wish knew us a little less? A problematic little organization that is a homonym of our favorite flatbread. So sorry,...

Ayyy no Nazi Pope! We’ll never put ketchup on a hot dog again!

We’re on a new beat today called RELIGION 🙏👼

With America’s personality rankings in the toilet, a non-Nazi Pope was anything but guaranteed, but then we find out that our Chicago Pope has been beefing with JD Vance since the inauguration?? Okay, praise Him!! 

And next these BBWs have an important business reminder: we have a brand new Patreon tier coming so...

This week, Lindy is dying :/ Bye girl!!!

But the show must go on! So this week we are releasing a very special episode. An abridged semi-exclusive limited release Very Special Episode previously only heard on our Patreon! That’s right. It’s 2 Shrill 2 Furious: Portland Drift—our rewatch series of Shrill. Specifically, we’re talking about the Pool Party episode written by the incredible Samantha Irby. And you’re gonna lose i...

We have so many new delights to share with you. First off, we’re GORGEOUS?? Lindy washes her bangs and Meagan is absolutely slathered in rouge. Tune into our socials to see the evidence of this glow-up/looks-maxxing, and let us know if it’s worth all the effort @textmebackpod on IG.  And we also share a BFF endorsement/reunion story that means everything to us!! This is your invitation to send every episode of Text Me...

HOUSTON WE HAVE A PROBLEM! 

GET 👏US 👏OUTTA HERE 👏

Last week dire wolves, this week…Gayle King is in space? You might think that all of the world’s problems have been solved if we’re spending time doing this nonsense–but actually, nope! Believe it or not things are actually worse than ever! The BBWs are losing their minds in real time, but that’s okay because Magic Mind is here to tether them gently to Earth. 

Hello faithful Text Me Backolytes and welcome new listeners (we’re sorry in advance to newbies! You could not have chosen a more wild starting place, but you’ll catch on fast!). Today Lindy and Meagan kick off with a humble but necessary installment of Department of Corrections: Peter Edition. Apparently one of these colonizing yahoos from last week did, in fact, step foot in Washington State–but don’t worry, we’ve decided...

If you thought Lindy’s train adventure was an unhinged delight YOU ARE IN FOR A TREAT. This week it’s Meagan who hits the dusty trail on a trek from Washington, (District of Columbia) to Washington (State). Meagan bravely Dale Coopers her whole ass off with that tiny influencer mic. Along the way she endures a mid-flight beef with her evil auntie doppelganger, being bullied by her brother, and a fight for her life over a C...

This week, Lindy and Meagan submit a heartfelt notes app apology. We are so sorry to all the snakes and worms and devoted listeners out there. To help mend some of these shattered fences, we bring you not just one…but THREE Snakes of the Week 🐍🐍🐍!!! Thank you to a loyal Husband listener Peter for submitting an iconic snake anecdote! 

And next, we are joined by our Pete Hegseth Correspondent Rafil! The emojis and mem...

Lindy is running on the fumes of borrowed youth, and Meagan is one (1) glass of wine deep. This is the opposite of a Magic Mind episode where we’re cool collected cucumbers and we’re calling it Tipsy Back Podcast!

Lindy brings tidings from the So True Hype House, where Lindy desperately tries to impress her young comedy crushes, starts a group chat she may or may not be kicked out of, and endures a self-imposed spiral of ra...

Welcome to another classic episode of Text Me Back, where Lindy and Meagan, two self-appointed kings, tackle the most pressing issues of our time. See agenda below:

FIRST AGENDA ITEM: Buggies. Meagan bullies a neighbor by sending another round of live bugs to a stranger’s building. And friends…there is potentially a third round of bugs en route. The only real downside is that this is accidental bullying and Meagan may h...