Self-Leadership:
The Roadmap to Healing, Hope, and Deeper Intimacy
In this episode of the Human Intimacy Podcast, Dr. Kevin Skinner and MaryAnn Michaelis reflect on Marianne’s powerful experience presenting at the ITAP (International Institute of Trauma and Addiction Professionals) Conference, where she introduced a healing-intensive approach combining Frazier’s Dissociative Table and Accelerated Resolution Therapy (ART). Together, they explore the theme of self-leadership—what it means to take ownership of your healing journey and to navigate pain, trauma, and emotional disconnection with intention and insight.
They dive into the importance of understanding our internal parts, drawing from Richard Schwartz’s Internal Family Systems (IFS) and his concept of “No Bad Parts.” Listeners are guided to reflect on their emotional patterns, discover the unmet needs behind their actions, and learn how to respond to their emotions with compassion rather than reactivity. The conversation emphasizes that true self-leadership is not about perfection, but about authenticity, congruency, and ultimately, the ability to show up more fully in our most important relationships.
Whether you're healing from betrayal, navigating relationship challenges, or seeking personal growth, this episode offers practical insights and encouragement to help you reconnect with yourself and others.
Key Topics Covered:
The role of self-leadership in trauma recovery and personal transformation
Using the Dissociative Table and ART in a one-day intensive model
Internal Family Systems and understanding our emotional “parts”
The difference between insight and action in behavior change
How trauma can lead to emotional reactivity and how to regulate it
Why connection is the ultimate goal of healing and self-mastery
The importance of giving yourself permission to pause and prioritize healing
Resources Mentioned:
Frazier’s Dissociative Table Technique – A tool to identify internal parts and unresolved trauma
Accelerated Resolution Therapy (ART) – A trauma-informed approach for rapid emotional processing
Internal Family Systems (IFS) by Richard Schwartz
Book: No Bad Parts by Dr. Richard C. Schwartz
Seven Habits of Highly Effective People by Stephen R. Covey (reference to “Sharpen the Saw”)
Loving-Kindness Meditation – A mindfulness practice focused on compassion for self and others
Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) – Insights on unmet needs and attachment ruptures in couples
Quote from C.S. Lewis – “There are no ordinary people. You have never talked to a mere mortal.”
Listener Takeaway: You don’t have to be perfect to lead yourself well. Begin by noticing your patterns, asking what your emotions are trying to tell you, and taking small, intentional steps toward the connection and healing you deserve. Self-leadership is ultimately a journey toward becoming the kind of person who can love—and be loved—deeply.
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