November 26, 2024 • 38 mins
Parenting isn’t easy—but some people really take missing the mark to the next level. In this week’s episode of Internet Friendsy, Isaiah and Marley share some big news—they’re expecting a baby! Naturally, this makes us reflect on some hilariously bad (and sometimes infuriating) parenting stories from the internet.
We’ve got:
- A dad who forces his son to quit basketball because he didn’t score a D1 scholarship.
- A mom who decides to take a pregnancy test in front of her 10-year-old daughter, leaving her husband awkwardly wondering, Who’s the AH here?
- A teenager who receives a "goal" dress from her friend’s mom—a gift that’s two sizes too small.
- And a husband who’s struggling to forgive his wife after she said something unforgivable about their kids during a tough time with her mental health.
As always, one story is completely made up, and it’s up to you to figure out which one it is. Join us for laughs, debates, and a little parenting advice (the kind you probably shouldn’t take).
Available now on all podcast platforms and YouTube!
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:00):
Welcome back to internet frenzy. What's up?
(00:09):
You don't want to know what happens when she chokes on stuff
Readers readers digest version at Texas Roadhouse for his birthday and
And luckily we're all done eating but she got a little something stuck in the throat and just she just made sure it all came out
(00:31):
It wasn't even all it wasn't even the meat. It was chicken fried steak and
It wasn't going down and I could breathe until I put the water in my mouth
So try and push it down and then that's when I couldn't breathe and so the water had to come up
Maybe there were some charm and through her nose
I just I just like heard a mild noise and like looked out of my peripherals and like this one thing
(00:56):
You don't know about me like without a nose. No, and it's okay because like obviously glad you're safe
Glad you didn't choke and die, but like that happens
But I I just saw like out of my peripheral and I was already way too full eating too much food at Texas Roadhouse
But I like just saw the drip
Like oh, that's like one of the things that I could not look at me. I watched the whole thing
(01:21):
Did you see me like trying to swallow my water? Yeah, and I see you just like
On the food
I looked quick and I looked away cuz I was like oh shoot
Oh my apologies it ended my meal like
(01:42):
Like at the right time because they should have ended earlier by my own it should have ended on the appetizers
Texas Roadhouse man. Whoop those rolls. Do you dirty?
I don't I shouldn't even order a meal quick little recap last week feminine rage
One of these weeks. Maybe we'll do a story or like we'll do a theme of
Guys being stupid, but I feel like it's woven into every masculinity
(02:08):
Perfect that's I like it who had the fake last week. I did it whoever makes this pop going in their mouth was the fake
Wasn't me
I made it on my mouth that first
Yeah
Edited yeah the story about the girl getting trying to win her boyfriend back. That was great. Yeah
(02:35):
She is spicy little fake character
Completely fake
Created her you guys know I was honestly kind of fooled just cuz I thought I don't know I feel like I'm really bad at spotting
The thing that's okay. There's a lot of people that are really though
It's I think it's actually pretty difficult to do especially with some of the stuff that people post on a reddit
(02:55):
It's crazy. I know right? I'm like any of these could be real cuz people are all whack. Yeah, so
Dude, I have some crazy stories in my life
Yeah, that I should honestly talk about on this podcast someday
Oh, I have a I have a Rolodex just waiting for the time we can open up a personal story
Yeah, we should that should be one of our episodes the next one personal
(03:16):
No, let's do it personal story and it better be like your craziest experience. You've ever had I don't know that
I really have one. You know what's a really crazy one. What?
Being like three months like married
More than that and pregnant
If you four months pregnant wait
(03:45):
We are almost five months almost five months and
Marley's pregnant
Yep five weeks five days for YouTube viewers. It's a little it's just a little guy for you now
It's going to be a boy we already know I say it's convinced saying the comments if you think it's boy or girl
(04:09):
I think it's a boy. I honestly kind of think it's a boy. No, it's a girl
I'm speaking in the only person that thinks it's a girl
If I make this in my mouth right now with my eyes closed, it's a girl. Okay doing the popcorn thing
(04:29):
There you go ladies and gents I missed if anyone so yeah leave your
Your guesses in the comments and that leads us into the topic of this week
(04:55):
Because you guys you guys are gonna need this the topic is how not to be a parent
We could try to tell you how to be a parent, but no one can it turns out it's pretty hard
So this is just what not to do. Yeah, I think that's a little easier. Yeah, let's just talk crap about people
That's way easier
Let's make a podcast about it. Yeah
(05:17):
And we're killing it am I the asshole for forcing my son to quit basketball because he didn't get a scholarship offer. Oh
Yeah, I
38 male have a 17 year old son who has been playing basketball since he was a kid
He has always been really passionate about it and I've always supported him every step of the way
I spent thousands on private coaching camps and travel teams and I've always told him
(05:41):
He has potential to play at the next level if he works hard enough
He's been working for a scholarship to a division one school for the last couple of years
And I've been pushing him to do whatever it takes to make that happen
We've had some pretty intense conversations about his future
And I've made it clear to him that basketball is his ticket to a good education and a better future
His mom has been supportive, but she's a bit more lenient when it comes to how much pressure we put on it
(06:04):
This year was the big year. He had a great season and we were hoping for some scholarship offers or at least some solid interest from college scouts
I kept reminding him that he that the more he put into the game the better his chances were but after all the tournament
Showcases and recruitments. He didn't even get a single scholarship offer not even a letter of interest
He was obviously disappointed and so was I but I tried to stay calm and happy at first
(06:28):
I told him we still had time and he could keep working hard and maybe get an offer before the end of the year
But deep down I was pissed and angry at him for not playing at his potential and angry at myself for not pushing him harder
And upset at the system for not recognizing his potential. Here's where I might have messed up though
I told him that if he wasn't going to get a scholarship, he should quit basketball entirely
(06:49):
I told him that if college wasn't in the future, there was no point in continuing with the sport
I said he had been wasting time money and effort on something that wasn't going to get him anywhere
I told him he should focus on his grades and think about a real future instead of chasing a dream that probably wouldn't work out
He was so sad and also pissed
He didn't want to quit and he felt like he still had a chance if he kept working at it
(07:10):
But I told him that he wouldn't get anywhere without a scholarship and that basketball was over
I said we couldn't afford to keep throwing money at something that wasn't going to happen
He tried to argue with me saying he still loved the game and didn't want to give up
But I didn't listen
I told him that he could either be realistic about his future or continue to chase a dream that wasn't coming true
So later on he then quit the team and here we are now
(07:32):
So am I the household for forcing my son to quit basketball because he didn't get a scholarship offer?
I am heeded
Maybe it's the coach's fault that he's not getting any offers like are we what is it called scouting like what?
Not scouting like basically like I had coaches growing up
They were like helping me get seen by like sending videos and like even like you got an email like
(07:56):
My parents or my mom helped me with that and my coaches
The thing is though is that he was going to like camps where there was recruiters and things and like still wasn't getting anything
But here's here's my thought too
If you are pushing for D1 school and there they were expecting D1 schools to be looking at him and interested
(08:17):
I'm sorry, but if you're thinking that D1 schools are gonna be interested in you and no one's reaching out
You're obviously out of caliber where you feel like you are good enough for D1
That's what I'm trying to say which means D2 schools D3
Community colleges they should absolutely be reaching out to you. So the fact that he's not getting anything
That's weird. Why Joe? I know why and it's actually dad's fault
(08:44):
It's because he's five foot five and he got bad genetics from his dad
Is this you or we're talking about or oh, yeah, yeah, this is me. Yeah, except for I haven't quit basketball
I can still go to the church and play my dad didn't say hey
You can't play anymore. You have to give to take your ball and go home and pop it
Yeah, it's yeah that guy's a douchebag for that and I've I have questions. I have many questions
(09:22):
Well, I would like to say is honestly like
Did the kid really think but honestly like that's kind of right like if you don't have a scholarship
Then like what is there to do
With basketball after like I am are you are you like being sad about you? No
No, I know I know but like you're like still pursuing
(09:45):
Golf like after high school, you know, I mean, yeah, but like I don't get how basketball work like that's easy
I feel like that's like okay
But also he's 17
Yeah, he's a junior like what was no it's it's a senior but like but he could walk on and get a scholarship
Well, not even that's like the season doesn't seem like it's over. He's like you need to quit the team
(10:10):
Unless the only thing I could think of is he might be playing club ball. Yeah, dad. Yeah of high school
Well, or both it's not the same time
No, but sometimes kids will just play club ball and not because that you can get more recognition
Mission especially if you're any good. Yeah, that's what they do now
They just play a you and now you can like as soon as you're of age you can just enter the league
(10:32):
But he obviously was good enough to where they were reaching for a D1
You're not you're not gonna be a super crappy player and think you're getting a D1 scholarship
You're just not well not super crappy
But like you you could very much miss like you could miss important elements of being a D1 athlete and like
Yeah, dad wasn't a wasn't a college athlete. He doesn't freaking know like just trying hard and just spending money on it
(10:57):
Doesn't mean you're gonna be a D1 athlete. I'm so heated right now. You look so heated. I mean
furious
There's that feminine rage coming out. He probably did does have offers to smaller schools
But they said that
Well, yeah, no, he said that they want D1 schools. Oh, they're not even looking at like they want division one for your college
(11:23):
Like big like they want a big school. Hey, this is a message to all parents
Don't be an idiot if you can get your school paid for it doesn't have to be D1
D2 D3 and a I a all great kids kids
Like me as an athlete with all my friends everyone wanted D1
But it's like take what you can get if you are wanted at that school that is the place you should go
(11:45):
Go where you are wanted
If if you want if you want to play your sport you can walk on you could walk on to the Juco and get better
Because guess what when you're 17 your body's not even fully developed
What if he's 115 pounds?
Like you need to you need to have a little more meat on your bones if you were gonna play D1
Nobody's gonna look at you if you're a toothpick like that's there's just things
(12:08):
So well, yeah, unless you're seven foot six
And you have handles like a guard
Dad's a dewy dad doesn't know
Yes, yeah
You don't make your kid quit like you should just be proud of them that they worked this hard and you obviously the kid pushed like
(12:29):
The dad never was like I had to push him to work
He didn't want you ever and blah blah blah
Well, it's probably such a slap in the face of the kid like when it like all these years his dad has been like so
Gung-ho about it has been like wanting to do everything that he can to like support his kid and then
Soon as he doesn't get a scholarship. It's like, okay. Bye
(12:49):
Like that sucks. So this is from Emma the asshole for telling my wife that it was bad parenting for her to take a pregnancy test
With our daughter in the bathroom with her
Yes
No, this listen my wife had already taken one test and gotten a faint positive
She was fairly sure she was pregnant because of that and the symptoms she had been experiencing
(13:12):
So when she tested a few days later, she asked our daughter if she wanted to do it with her
Our daughter did so they took the test together
I found out later when the test confirmed my wife was pregnant and she told me I let my wife know that I thought it was bad
Pantene our daughter 10 is still too young and to be exposed to things like that and certainly up close
There's no reason or justification for it. I have never heard of a mother doing a pregnancy test together with her daughter
(13:36):
And even if it was a thing it would be so wrong in my view. She also should have asked me before
She did something like this. I don't think this decision should have been made
Unilaterally all of this makes it a really poor decision in my opinion. My wife doesn't agree
She felt it was a bonding experience and an opportunity for her and our daughter to talk
To talk more about their bodies and educate her more on pregnancy in the reproductive
(14:00):
System she thinks I owe her an apology for saying that she acted like a bad parent in that situation
I disagree not sure if either of us are being the asshole. Oh, and then he has edit
I can't read all these comments and I'm not going to try most aren't even worth responding to since they're downright nasty and rude
What do you think? Well, I'm kind of curious here the calm aspect. Let's read. Let's go back to that in a second
(14:21):
Um, first thing is I'm me and my guy are on the same page here. We're both just like, huh?
What?
Ridiculous. It's the weirdest thing like I and I found myself even teetering because I'm like, yeah, okay
He's obviously like mad about it. He's like he's like that was foul. That was a wrong thing to do
In my mind where I went was just like it's weird
(14:44):
Like I don't understand why the 10 year old has to be in the bathroom
I mean, that's that's like not really like a birds-in-the-bees type of situation
You're not like and when a mommy and a daddy love each other really much. It's positive
Like piffing the cup and you it doesn't it's like sticking there
Yeah, I don't understand the mom being like like hey ten-year-old
(15:05):
Do you want to come in here while I find out if I'm pregnant?
There's just there's questions all over at first
I was picturing like a 45 year old mom and like a teenage daughter
Like that's like where my mind went and I was just like no weird. I don't okay
I'm gonna I'm gonna make my piece and that's I don't think I wouldn't be mad, but I would think it was weird
(15:25):
I just don't I don't see a need for that. It's not like a
It's not like a if you do that with our daughter. I'm gonna be pissed. It's just I don't understand
Why she would need to be in there. That's where I stand
I think what kind of got me like oh like this is a good thing is like when he was like
She felt that this was a bonding experience and an opportunity for her and our daughter to talk more about their bodies and educate her more
(15:47):
On pregnancy and the reproductive system. She's an FN
No, but it's not that crazy like kids are learning more like sooner about
All of these things they're learning more about their bodies like girls are having periods earlier, which is sad
You know and it's like I don't think it's super crazy for her mom to like want to educate her on those things or like
(16:10):
know like what
Things are and like what they're called like I think that's really important because if you don't
If you don't know then I think it's just like I think it's not crazy
I think it's a really special moment and I totally would do that with my daughter
Like I actually think it's such a bonding experience. I think it's so special and
(16:32):
Like men will never understand. Sorry boys, but yeah, you won't
You won't have so much as mama's hair. Yeah, we're just the inferior
Yes, one's yes, right exactly
No, but like a good learning experience. I think it's beautiful
I would love to have I love be like I love look like if it's positive and then kind of show her all the things
(16:56):
I'm not gonna have her watch me pee, but like yeah, I'm like, I don't think she needs to see me pee
And I doubt the mom did that it but that's what probably happen come into the bathroom with me while I
What you do is you pee on this stick and then this line pops up and that's what tells you if you're pregnant and the kids like
Okay, you're just peeing on a stick
(17:16):
But there was obviously more to that conversation than just that if her the mom was like explaining the reproductive system and like how all works
But that's what I mean is I'm sure she wasn't like yeah, here's how the reproductive system works
It's more of like a this is how you find out if you're pregnant when that time comes like I
I
Honestly think she's a great parent. I think it's a beautiful moment and I'm in support of it
(17:40):
So what do you think about the guy the dad being upset about it? You think the dad's just a
Dumb just a bad guy. No, he's just a guy. He doesn't understand
There's something so special about being pregnant and carrying your own child and like
Being your my daughter will one day experience that as well
And like I just think it's a really cool moment to like show her and teach her and like include her in those things
(18:04):
I don't know. I think it's special. This is the best is a perfect example of like yeah
Just how different men and women think because when we think that you took your ten-year-old into the bathroom
And you took a pregnancy test together like we're not thinking that the ten-year-old took the pregnancy test to it's just like
Why does she have to be in there at the same time?
Like why does she have to be in there while you're all you're doing is peeing you're peeing on a stick and it's amazing, right?
(18:30):
Like it's very cool that like the HCG and your pee
Makes like changes it on a test like I seriously like I think that's cool
But I just don't understand why she had to be in the bathroom while you peed. Yeah, I think it's just I think she's just weird
Like that's hella weird like would it be weird if like really weird
Look imagine if I bring Isaiah junior into the bathroom while I piss hey come hold my dong
(18:57):
My piss
No, that is so weird she's weird there's weird human being
That is weird when you you don't pee in front of a child
I don't give it to your kid. You don't sit down and just be like see that see that cross
(19:22):
That's positive as shit. There you go. I thought your dad. I told him that we were pregnant. What do you think?
Do you see a line?
Especially at being a daughter because one day she's gonna experience it as well
Oh, hopefully yeah, is there any discussion to be had about 10 not being the right age?
(19:45):
What is the right age? Never just have the conversation outside of the bathroom have the real
Conversation about what it's like if you're mom. Let's just if you're mom right now
Okay, and she was younger. Let's say she was in there. It was like I think I'm pregnant
Like come in the bathroom watch me pee and let's see if I let's see if I'm like hold on sorry
(20:08):
Like are you gonna go watch your mom pee? I've seen my mom pee, but are
The women are women are built different. I've seen every inch of all of my sisters and my mom
So I see no problem. It's but just think about girls all go into the bathroom together. They do that
Oh, yeah, we grew up doing that. That's like stall
(20:29):
Uh, yes, you don't even want to know the things that us girls do in the stall. Yeah, y'all weird
Yeah, like weird. I don't know. I just see I yeah
I just I think it's just the difference between men and women and you guys can think it's weird
But we can think that it's not so weird. I think I'd be upset. Well, everybody thinks it's an asshole
So like you don't need to show our daughter
(20:52):
You don't need to show our daughter you pissing
Even if it is to like see if you're pregnant or not, they don't need to watch you pee shut the door
When you are doing that what you're supposed to do, which I'm figured this is what she did is you're supposed to pee in like a
Clean like cup or things like that first
So it's not like she's just paying on a stick her legs are like she's you have to be very
(21:16):
like
Positioned correctly to get it in the cup. Okay, and then that's a fact by the way because since potty training
I'm like, hey, you got to get in here and teach this girl how to aim this thing
Like it just goes wherever it wants like there's no way to
Like you can't use your hand to move it
(21:38):
anyway
So she's like so it's not like she's overly exposed to her 10 year old daughter
That's not but I still think she's hanging in a cup and then you take it out
Then you get the stick and then you put in them. So you literally you're just in there doing doing the lab experiment like
(21:58):
Yeah, I don't know I'm with you. I it feels it feels a little weird
It's a little weird. I'm not mad about it. It's just weird
It she said I probably would do it with Ila
I'm sure you good and I would just hear about it and be like cool
You guys you guys have your bond and I'm just the dad. I'm
So glad that she was in there for that. Let me know if I'm needed for anything
(22:22):
Nope, you did your job
Then I'll just steer clear you're relieved of your duty
There's this one comment that says you do realize your daughter could start her period any day now or any time in the next two years
And all your wife did was pee on a stick and talk about hormones and fertility cycles
I'm Betty you're the asshole 10 is not too young my oldest started sex ed and puberty talks at 10 in school
(22:43):
Yeah, I remember that like fifth grade. We literally had the sex talk. Okay, so one part of this way different
Okay, I have I have a thing this is important girls have to figure out how to do like tampons and stuff when a 10 year old or 11 12 year old
Yeah, this is revelatory. This is why we don't understand your guys is weirdness
(23:05):
Is because that think about they have to go into much more like anatomy stuff than we ever do like for us
It's when we're little kids like your balls drop just aiming and get it in the toilet and wipe the sea if you miss
That's the only that's the only
Okay, so that just occurred to me because I'm a dude of dudes so like
(23:25):
The whole period thing that changes the whole game and now all of a sudden it's a little bit less weird
Thanks to the comment. Yeah, but it's not like she's showing her like that you think she's showing her her period
Like this is what it looks like when I period now
You are taking this like so like you're acting like this mom is just a nasty now
I think she's just I think it's just really weird. It's but think about it
(23:47):
What do you think the Congress just don't answer this but think what do you think the conversation is like when a mom has to
Teach a daughter how to use a tampon that's way different than like here come watch me piss
That's the thing is it's actually not that different if you think about it
It's just like it's not the mom is not her intention was not to show her daughter how she pees
So why didn't the mom just go pee put in the cup and then say we don't know that that's not what she did
(24:11):
We don't know that that's not what she did that guy
But he wouldn't be that upset then if that was the case
He's thinking of it the way that we were thinking of it like not thinking that girls are freaking different and weird
Maybe he's jealous of their bond and that he's projecting. No, that's crazy. I've never heard that before
(24:32):
This one comes from a new subreddit to the pod
I'm actually excited because I found this and I read so many crazy freaking stories from it
But for the sake of this the subreddit is called am I overreacting am I overreacting for not getting over my wife threatening our children's lives
This happened about nine months ago, and I'm still struggling to move past it
(24:52):
My wife has a temper when she gets angry she tends to scream yell and say deeply hurtful things
These outbursts don't happen all the time
But when they do she often ends up not speaking to friends or family for months due to the fallout during this particular
Incident she was going through intense withdrawals from heavy marijuana use. She's experienced this a few times before
It's quite severe with vomiting sweating and more at this time
(25:14):
She's extremely difficult to be around angry about everything and trying to control everyone around her
We were discussing her situation and it quickly escalated. She mentioned feeling suicidal and unable to keep living
Then she said this sentence that changed everything for me, and this is in quotations. Don't worry if I kill myself
I'm taking the kids with me, then you will be all alone
(25:35):
She said this with a sinister sneer and was very lucid at that moment. I disassociated
I tried to get her to stop yelling but couldn't I don't remember much of the rest of the day
I've previously confided in her that my biggest fear growing up was my psychotic stepdad losing it and killing my entire family
So this hit me especially hard
I'm terrified of not protecting my kids from abuse like my mom couldn't protect me nine months later
(25:57):
If I try to bring up what she said she explodes and calls me a liar. She adamantly claims she never felt that way
I'm not sure if she was just trying to hurt me or what I understand
She was in a bad place when she said it but now I worry she won't tell me if she feels that way again
There have been other troubling conversations. She's convinced that if an apocalypse happens
She'll kill herself and the kids. This was a huge wake-up call for me
(26:18):
I started going to therapy and convinced her to go to marriage counseling
We've gone through two counselors since then she blew up at both and refused to go back
I didn't bring up the specific threat and counseling because she made a huge deal about me not mentioning it
Our sessions were generally miserable as we couldn't agree on basic facts of our daily life either
She's manipulative can't remember things said when she's angry or I'm an unreliable narrator of my own life
(26:40):
Since then I've seen a lot of self-improvement. My anxiety is much lower
I'm better at standing up for myself and my children and I'm getting out more to see friends something
I was too nervous to do before my wife has improved to her explosions happen less often the threats are less severe and she's been
On better behavior. I've made it clear that I'm unsure if we can make things work
My wife wants me to forgive forget and move on
(27:01):
She has a point the only thing stopping us from getting along now is my hesitation to fully commit
But I'm scared she broke my trust and getting close again risks more hurt
This wasn't the only incident just the one that opened my eyes if it weren't for the kids
I would have left long ago, but I don't want to see them less. I think I trust her with them
She's a good mom despite her anger issues. The last thing I want is a court battle
(27:23):
My dad lost custody of me in one of those. I feel pretty stuck. Am I overreacting? No, no, no, no, no
She on met like he you cannot be he said I'm sorry. That's bad parenting like that
his
Those children are unsafe with her around. She needs to be on medication. She needs to be in therapy
(27:45):
She needs to get like evaluated
No one is saying something like that unless they mean it
More than once and he needs to tell someone
The fact that she said I'll go but you can't talk about that to a therapist
That's yeah, she you know that's been on the back of her mind today. Yeah, that's not okay
I felt sick reading like listening to that honestly
(28:08):
It's like that one story of the lady that like took each kid to the bathroom and like kill them all
Remember that or the mom that drove her kids into the lake. Yeah, like
Stuff like that's what that reminded me of that's creepy
Well, that's funny that he says that that he's hung up on like these comments
But then he's like but I trust her with them and she's a good mom
(28:29):
I'm like you obviously do not trust her with them if you're still really hung up on this comment
And you think that like oh like maybe she would do that. So I don't know
I think he's but obviously you want to see the best in like your spouse and I think he's just scared to leave her
Oh, yeah, he has no backbone. He's like I'm starting to get a backbone. No, it's like what it what like is she the breadwinner?
(28:51):
Like what is it that you're like afraid to leave? Well, I don't want to see the kids in a left
It doesn't have to have anything to do with money. It can literally just be like personality type
She's obviously a much more dominant like headstrong personality and that's like opposite to track
That's probably why they got together to begin with he absolutely your eyes. I say you're right
(29:12):
He needs to tell someone because and by someone a professional. I mean dog told the whole internet. So
Anonymously doesn't count. I also think he needs to if he did divorce her though
The problem is is that she's gonna have the kids alone and she would for 50% of the time and she'd say if you leave me
I'm gonna blah blah like that sucks. Yeah, so what is he actually supposed to do?
(29:36):
He's got to tell a professional like so we're saying that's the best option is he needs to to take her to
inpatient like
Mental hospital she would spy on you imagine. Yeah, she'd lose her shit. She'd have to go in there and handcuffs like perfect
Yeah, I just think you would have to tell a cops that like this is what she said because then they have to like investigate
(29:58):
That's the problem though
You have to do it at the time because in nine months after the fact is not the time to be like hey
Police officers my wife said this a long time ago and she was depressed and in a fit of rage
And I can't get over it and we still fight and she wears the pants in our relationship
So yeah, she's doing a little better now. You should have weed just try to fire her up one more time
(30:19):
Yeah, see that's manipulative
Get her fired up one more time and then have the cops on speed dial. Yeah
It's really sad like here's the thing but if you're that stressed do it
Do it takes it's crazy because not being in the situation
It's easy for us to be like oh dude like you should have done this
(30:40):
But if you really try to put yourself in his shoes, yeah, that sucks
That's a hard freakin situation to be in where like obviously he's built a life with this woman
He loves her and like he wants to see her be at her best like you
When she said that horrible thing she was at her very worst with her mental health, so
That's obviously no excuse and I think the right thing would have been for him to consult authorities
(31:04):
Immediately because you can't risk it. You can't risk your kids life. It's like that's too important and we I mean
We all watch 2020 we see the dark stuff that happens in the world that sucks
I just I feel so bad for this dude and I really I think he needs to get out of this relationship, but
But he can't right. No, it's like it. I think that the move is at this point nine months in
(31:28):
Right now. I think the move is is to leave and to try to do it as healthily as possible
That's what I think right now. There's I think nine months or not. He still needs to tell authorities better
Now than ever, but yeah again, it's like if you tell the authorities all it's gonna do is make rage monster lady mad because
They're not gonna do anything. What are they gonna do about something that happened nine months ago that there's no proof of he needs to look at her
(31:54):
Google search history there could be some crazy stuff in there or she she covers her tracks
Well, and she's she's planning the end of everything and no one's gonna know probably doesn't though cover her tracks
If she wears the pants in the relationship
She's like I can walk all over and he's never gonna look at anything
Yeah, she'll just steamroll him if you're gonna want to try yeah, so he's got to like figure a way to like make her sleep a little longer
(32:18):
Dude, she oh drug her good good idea
Hi, babe
Listen Michael I really feel bad for this dude. This is my favorite comment. This woman is insanely abusive
You need to bring up the repeated threats in therapy the fact that she doesn't want you mentioning it means she knows exactly what she said and she
(32:39):
Refuses to take accountability for it. She's trying to make you feel responsible for protecting her reputation
When she's making horrific threats specifically to hurt you knowing your trauma
I hope you get out of this situation soon. You deserve better
Side note. I smoked marijuana heavily daily for 20 years and have been on and off of it several times in the past four years
(33:00):
Withdrawal does not make you abusive. She chooses to be like this. I'm so sorry for what you're going through
I wouldn't wish this level of abuse on anyone
She thought that was an important little that's really good. That's a good comment. Yeah, she's just sucks. She's the worst
I like really him. He needs to get out
Yes, it just sucks because she could get 50% and then what think about how the world is effed
(33:26):
Like not to be a doomsday or but like what is the actual right answer?
Because if he just leaves her then like you said the judicial system is gonna make it so that she has those kids 50% of the
Time in a weird way
He has to stay to try to protect his kids because he's in such a bad situation otherwise
Yeah, he's really those right now because then there would be her alone
(33:46):
And she could just do anything because he's not gonna get full custody
He's literally his life is gonna be trying to make her happy
So she doesn't kill herself and the kids that is a horrible life to live
That's but do again. What what can you even do?
Am I the asshole for making my daughter take a break from going to her best friend's house because the mom purposely
(34:07):
Bought her a smaller size dress about two weeks ago
My 14-year-old daughter Bonnie was out shopping with her best friend Gigi and Gigi's mom Lauren while they were out
Lauren bought them both dresses. She thought were cute except she bought Bonnie a size three Bonnie said she picked out one
That was her size but Lauren put it back and said that the size three one would be her
Aspirational dress to work towards fitting into when she came home. She gave it to me and was upset
(34:32):
But also didn't want to say anything bad about Gigi's mom which I get first off Bonnie is a healthy girl
Gymnastics until she was about 11 and grew several inches dance in the fall and track in the spring all her choices
She's got an athletic build
Gigi is a small girl barely five feet and so I thought at first she got them mixed up
She told me that Gigi's mom got it for her to aspire to try to get into by working hard
(34:56):
I said I take care of it and get her the right size the next day
I called Gigi's mom Lauren and asked her why she would do that
She explained that she thought it would give Bonnie something to work towards because she heard Bonnie saying she didn't get asked out last year
But Gigi had several boys after her and then it seemed like it upset her
I told her it was inappropriate and asked her why she would tell a kid
She needed to lose weight in order to get attention from boys
She got defensive and said that it was obviously embarrassing for Bonnie to not have boys into her when all her friends do
(35:21):
She basically said I'm holding Bonnie back from growing up like I won't help her with boys won't drop hundreds at Sephora
They'll dress her like a kid and buy
B&BW sprays instead of fancy perfumes said it's messing with Bonnie socially and that she's the only one in her friend group
Who hasn't had a boyfriend then she got personal and said just because I've given up and stopped trying
Doesn't mean I have to turn Bonnie into a nun for the record that is partially true
(35:46):
But it's also because Bonnie doesn't want that stuff
I have offered to get her more instead of fill skincare and she doesn't want it
She got straight A's last year and I took her to Ulta for a spree and all she wanted was some lip gloss and then asked for the body spray instead
I said that it's time for a break the girls can still hang out
But I don't want Bonnie at Gigi's house Bonnie got upset over it and I can deal with that Gigi's mom
(36:08):
However has gotten nuclear over it spreading poison everywhere she can about me being psycho and doubling down on Hall it's all because I don't want my
Daughter to be happy with a boyfriend when I'm single and no man would touch me
Which is just childish and I've been shocked to see how other people have reacted to this
So now I'm questioning my own parenting which I never do am I the asshole?
(36:29):
Oh my gosh, yeah, Lauren is a bad mom. That's how you don't be a parent
Got it noted don't buy a dress. That's too small for a girl is a nice gesture like
Try a little harder in your own kid either. No, it's like it'd be yeah, there's no good way
(36:50):
If you want not mine don't fat shame don't fat shame any kid, but definitely okay unless it's really bad
Then I'm not gonna shame them, but like I definitely am gonna like
Make them work out. This is like do five ten push ups
Dude just wait bro. You're you're gonna put on some dad weight in no time and like I know but my kids
(37:16):
Listen bro, all right, how about you just
Actions speak louder than words. There's more to life. Here's the thing get them interested in sports and then it all takes care of itself
Yeah, exactly. Yeah, but then again, it's like what if they are a little bit thicker?
What if your son's alignment? It's fine. Oh, they're perfect be alignment, but it's like I want them to be healthy
Yeah, but
(37:37):
Lawrence a hoe good episode guys. I'm loving it how not to be a parent
Like people are gonna get heated
About what just like listening to other stories. Oh, we had to say that was a fun episode
Thanks for listening. Give us a rate on your favorite podcasting app watch us on YouTube
Drop a comment on socials. We love you
(37:59):
Love you
Francis on 3123 please don't say
Welcome back to internet frenzy. What's up?
(00:09):
You don't want to know what happens when she chokes on stuff
Readers readers digest version at Texas Roadhouse for his birthday and
And luckily we're all done eating but she got a little something stuck in the throat and just she just made sure it all came out
(00:31):
It wasn't even all it wasn't even the meat. It was chicken fried steak and
It wasn't going down and I could breathe until I put the water in my mouth
So try and push it down and then that's when I couldn't breathe and so the water had to come up
Maybe there were some charm and through her nose
I just I just like heard a mild noise and like looked out of my peripherals and like this one thing
(00:56):
You don't know about me like without a nose. No, and it's okay because like obviously glad you're safe
Glad you didn't choke and die, but like that happens
But I I just saw like out of my peripheral and I was already way too full eating too much food at Texas Roadhouse
But I like just saw the drip
Like oh, that's like one of the things that I could not look at me. I watched the whole thing
(01:21):
Did you see me like trying to swallow my water? Yeah, and I see you just like
On the food
I looked quick and I looked away cuz I was like oh shoot
Oh my apologies it ended my meal like
(01:42):
Like at the right time because they should have ended earlier by my own it should have ended on the appetizers
Texas Roadhouse man. Whoop those rolls. Do you dirty?
I don't I shouldn't even order a meal quick little recap last week feminine rage
One of these weeks. Maybe we'll do a story or like we'll do a theme of
Guys being stupid, but I feel like it's woven into every masculinity
(02:08):
Perfect that's I like it who had the fake last week. I did it whoever makes this pop going in their mouth was the fake
Wasn't me
I made it on my mouth that first
Yeah
Edited yeah the story about the girl getting trying to win her boyfriend back. That was great. Yeah
(02:35):
She is spicy little fake character
Completely fake
Created her you guys know I was honestly kind of fooled just cuz I thought I don't know I feel like I'm really bad at spotting
The thing that's okay. There's a lot of people that are really though
It's I think it's actually pretty difficult to do especially with some of the stuff that people post on a reddit
(02:55):
It's crazy. I know right? I'm like any of these could be real cuz people are all whack. Yeah, so
Dude, I have some crazy stories in my life
Yeah, that I should honestly talk about on this podcast someday
Oh, I have a I have a Rolodex just waiting for the time we can open up a personal story
Yeah, we should that should be one of our episodes the next one personal
(03:16):
No, let's do it personal story and it better be like your craziest experience. You've ever had I don't know that
I really have one. You know what's a really crazy one. What?
Being like three months like married
More than that and pregnant
If you four months pregnant wait
(03:45):
We are almost five months almost five months and
Marley's pregnant
Yep five weeks five days for YouTube viewers. It's a little it's just a little guy for you now
It's going to be a boy we already know I say it's convinced saying the comments if you think it's boy or girl
(04:09):
I think it's a boy. I honestly kind of think it's a boy. No, it's a girl
I'm speaking in the only person that thinks it's a girl
If I make this in my mouth right now with my eyes closed, it's a girl. Okay doing the popcorn thing
(04:29):
There you go ladies and gents I missed if anyone so yeah leave your
Your guesses in the comments and that leads us into the topic of this week
(04:55):
Because you guys you guys are gonna need this the topic is how not to be a parent
We could try to tell you how to be a parent, but no one can it turns out it's pretty hard
So this is just what not to do. Yeah, I think that's a little easier. Yeah, let's just talk crap about people
That's way easier
Let's make a podcast about it. Yeah
(05:17):
And we're killing it am I the asshole for forcing my son to quit basketball because he didn't get a scholarship offer. Oh
Yeah, I
38 male have a 17 year old son who has been playing basketball since he was a kid
He has always been really passionate about it and I've always supported him every step of the way
I spent thousands on private coaching camps and travel teams and I've always told him
(05:41):
He has potential to play at the next level if he works hard enough
He's been working for a scholarship to a division one school for the last couple of years
And I've been pushing him to do whatever it takes to make that happen
We've had some pretty intense conversations about his future
And I've made it clear to him that basketball is his ticket to a good education and a better future
His mom has been supportive, but she's a bit more lenient when it comes to how much pressure we put on it
(06:04):
This year was the big year. He had a great season and we were hoping for some scholarship offers or at least some solid interest from college scouts
I kept reminding him that he that the more he put into the game the better his chances were but after all the tournament
Showcases and recruitments. He didn't even get a single scholarship offer not even a letter of interest
He was obviously disappointed and so was I but I tried to stay calm and happy at first
(06:28):
I told him we still had time and he could keep working hard and maybe get an offer before the end of the year
But deep down I was pissed and angry at him for not playing at his potential and angry at myself for not pushing him harder
And upset at the system for not recognizing his potential. Here's where I might have messed up though
I told him that if he wasn't going to get a scholarship, he should quit basketball entirely
(06:49):
I told him that if college wasn't in the future, there was no point in continuing with the sport
I said he had been wasting time money and effort on something that wasn't going to get him anywhere
I told him he should focus on his grades and think about a real future instead of chasing a dream that probably wouldn't work out
He was so sad and also pissed
He didn't want to quit and he felt like he still had a chance if he kept working at it
(07:10):
But I told him that he wouldn't get anywhere without a scholarship and that basketball was over
I said we couldn't afford to keep throwing money at something that wasn't going to happen
He tried to argue with me saying he still loved the game and didn't want to give up
But I didn't listen
I told him that he could either be realistic about his future or continue to chase a dream that wasn't coming true
So later on he then quit the team and here we are now
(07:32):
So am I the household for forcing my son to quit basketball because he didn't get a scholarship offer?
I am heeded
Maybe it's the coach's fault that he's not getting any offers like are we what is it called scouting like what?
Not scouting like basically like I had coaches growing up
They were like helping me get seen by like sending videos and like even like you got an email like
(07:56):
My parents or my mom helped me with that and my coaches
The thing is though is that he was going to like camps where there was recruiters and things and like still wasn't getting anything
But here's here's my thought too
If you are pushing for D1 school and there they were expecting D1 schools to be looking at him and interested
(08:17):
I'm sorry, but if you're thinking that D1 schools are gonna be interested in you and no one's reaching out
You're obviously out of caliber where you feel like you are good enough for D1
That's what I'm trying to say which means D2 schools D3
Community colleges they should absolutely be reaching out to you. So the fact that he's not getting anything
That's weird. Why Joe? I know why and it's actually dad's fault
(08:44):
It's because he's five foot five and he got bad genetics from his dad
Is this you or we're talking about or oh, yeah, yeah, this is me. Yeah, except for I haven't quit basketball
I can still go to the church and play my dad didn't say hey
You can't play anymore. You have to give to take your ball and go home and pop it
Yeah, it's yeah that guy's a douchebag for that and I've I have questions. I have many questions
(09:22):
Well, I would like to say is honestly like
Did the kid really think but honestly like that's kind of right like if you don't have a scholarship
Then like what is there to do
With basketball after like I am are you are you like being sad about you? No
No, I know I know but like you're like still pursuing
(09:45):
Golf like after high school, you know, I mean, yeah, but like I don't get how basketball work like that's easy
I feel like that's like okay
But also he's 17
Yeah, he's a junior like what was no it's it's a senior but like but he could walk on and get a scholarship
Well, not even that's like the season doesn't seem like it's over. He's like you need to quit the team
(10:10):
Unless the only thing I could think of is he might be playing club ball. Yeah, dad. Yeah of high school
Well, or both it's not the same time
No, but sometimes kids will just play club ball and not because that you can get more recognition
Mission especially if you're any good. Yeah, that's what they do now
They just play a you and now you can like as soon as you're of age you can just enter the league
(10:32):
But he obviously was good enough to where they were reaching for a D1
You're not you're not gonna be a super crappy player and think you're getting a D1 scholarship
You're just not well not super crappy
But like you you could very much miss like you could miss important elements of being a D1 athlete and like
Yeah, dad wasn't a wasn't a college athlete. He doesn't freaking know like just trying hard and just spending money on it
(10:57):
Doesn't mean you're gonna be a D1 athlete. I'm so heated right now. You look so heated. I mean
furious
There's that feminine rage coming out. He probably did does have offers to smaller schools
But they said that
Well, yeah, no, he said that they want D1 schools. Oh, they're not even looking at like they want division one for your college
(11:23):
Like big like they want a big school. Hey, this is a message to all parents
Don't be an idiot if you can get your school paid for it doesn't have to be D1
D2 D3 and a I a all great kids kids
Like me as an athlete with all my friends everyone wanted D1
But it's like take what you can get if you are wanted at that school that is the place you should go
(11:45):
Go where you are wanted
If if you want if you want to play your sport you can walk on you could walk on to the Juco and get better
Because guess what when you're 17 your body's not even fully developed
What if he's 115 pounds?
Like you need to you need to have a little more meat on your bones if you were gonna play D1
Nobody's gonna look at you if you're a toothpick like that's there's just things
(12:08):
So well, yeah, unless you're seven foot six
And you have handles like a guard
Dad's a dewy dad doesn't know
Yes, yeah
You don't make your kid quit like you should just be proud of them that they worked this hard and you obviously the kid pushed like
(12:29):
The dad never was like I had to push him to work
He didn't want you ever and blah blah blah
Well, it's probably such a slap in the face of the kid like when it like all these years his dad has been like so
Gung-ho about it has been like wanting to do everything that he can to like support his kid and then
Soon as he doesn't get a scholarship. It's like, okay. Bye
(12:49):
Like that sucks. So this is from Emma the asshole for telling my wife that it was bad parenting for her to take a pregnancy test
With our daughter in the bathroom with her
Yes
No, this listen my wife had already taken one test and gotten a faint positive
She was fairly sure she was pregnant because of that and the symptoms she had been experiencing
(13:12):
So when she tested a few days later, she asked our daughter if she wanted to do it with her
Our daughter did so they took the test together
I found out later when the test confirmed my wife was pregnant and she told me I let my wife know that I thought it was bad
Pantene our daughter 10 is still too young and to be exposed to things like that and certainly up close
There's no reason or justification for it. I have never heard of a mother doing a pregnancy test together with her daughter
(13:36):
And even if it was a thing it would be so wrong in my view. She also should have asked me before
She did something like this. I don't think this decision should have been made
Unilaterally all of this makes it a really poor decision in my opinion. My wife doesn't agree
She felt it was a bonding experience and an opportunity for her and our daughter to talk
To talk more about their bodies and educate her more on pregnancy in the reproductive
(14:00):
System she thinks I owe her an apology for saying that she acted like a bad parent in that situation
I disagree not sure if either of us are being the asshole. Oh, and then he has edit
I can't read all these comments and I'm not going to try most aren't even worth responding to since they're downright nasty and rude
What do you think? Well, I'm kind of curious here the calm aspect. Let's read. Let's go back to that in a second
(14:21):
Um, first thing is I'm me and my guy are on the same page here. We're both just like, huh?
What?
Ridiculous. It's the weirdest thing like I and I found myself even teetering because I'm like, yeah, okay
He's obviously like mad about it. He's like he's like that was foul. That was a wrong thing to do
In my mind where I went was just like it's weird
(14:44):
Like I don't understand why the 10 year old has to be in the bathroom
I mean, that's that's like not really like a birds-in-the-bees type of situation
You're not like and when a mommy and a daddy love each other really much. It's positive
Like piffing the cup and you it doesn't it's like sticking there
Yeah, I don't understand the mom being like like hey ten-year-old
(15:05):
Do you want to come in here while I find out if I'm pregnant?
There's just there's questions all over at first
I was picturing like a 45 year old mom and like a teenage daughter
Like that's like where my mind went and I was just like no weird. I don't okay
I'm gonna I'm gonna make my piece and that's I don't think I wouldn't be mad, but I would think it was weird
(15:25):
I just don't I don't see a need for that. It's not like a
It's not like a if you do that with our daughter. I'm gonna be pissed. It's just I don't understand
Why she would need to be in there. That's where I stand
I think what kind of got me like oh like this is a good thing is like when he was like
She felt that this was a bonding experience and an opportunity for her and our daughter to talk more about their bodies and educate her more
(15:47):
On pregnancy and the reproductive system. She's an FN
No, but it's not that crazy like kids are learning more like sooner about
All of these things they're learning more about their bodies like girls are having periods earlier, which is sad
You know and it's like I don't think it's super crazy for her mom to like want to educate her on those things or like
(16:10):
know like what
Things are and like what they're called like I think that's really important because if you don't
If you don't know then I think it's just like I think it's not crazy
I think it's a really special moment and I totally would do that with my daughter
Like I actually think it's such a bonding experience. I think it's so special and
(16:32):
Like men will never understand. Sorry boys, but yeah, you won't
You won't have so much as mama's hair. Yeah, we're just the inferior
Yes, one's yes, right exactly
No, but like a good learning experience. I think it's beautiful
I would love to have I love be like I love look like if it's positive and then kind of show her all the things
(16:56):
I'm not gonna have her watch me pee, but like yeah, I'm like, I don't think she needs to see me pee
And I doubt the mom did that it but that's what probably happen come into the bathroom with me while I
What you do is you pee on this stick and then this line pops up and that's what tells you if you're pregnant and the kids like
Okay, you're just peeing on a stick
(17:16):
But there was obviously more to that conversation than just that if her the mom was like explaining the reproductive system and like how all works
But that's what I mean is I'm sure she wasn't like yeah, here's how the reproductive system works
It's more of like a this is how you find out if you're pregnant when that time comes like I
I
Honestly think she's a great parent. I think it's a beautiful moment and I'm in support of it
(17:40):
So what do you think about the guy the dad being upset about it? You think the dad's just a
Dumb just a bad guy. No, he's just a guy. He doesn't understand
There's something so special about being pregnant and carrying your own child and like
Being your my daughter will one day experience that as well
And like I just think it's a really cool moment to like show her and teach her and like include her in those things
(18:04):
I don't know. I think it's special. This is the best is a perfect example of like yeah
Just how different men and women think because when we think that you took your ten-year-old into the bathroom
And you took a pregnancy test together like we're not thinking that the ten-year-old took the pregnancy test to it's just like
Why does she have to be in there at the same time?
Like why does she have to be in there while you're all you're doing is peeing you're peeing on a stick and it's amazing, right?
(18:30):
Like it's very cool that like the HCG and your pee
Makes like changes it on a test like I seriously like I think that's cool
But I just don't understand why she had to be in the bathroom while you peed. Yeah, I think it's just I think she's just weird
Like that's hella weird like would it be weird if like really weird
Look imagine if I bring Isaiah junior into the bathroom while I piss hey come hold my dong
(18:57):
My piss
No, that is so weird she's weird there's weird human being
That is weird when you you don't pee in front of a child
I don't give it to your kid. You don't sit down and just be like see that see that cross
(19:22):
That's positive as shit. There you go. I thought your dad. I told him that we were pregnant. What do you think?
Do you see a line?
Especially at being a daughter because one day she's gonna experience it as well
Oh, hopefully yeah, is there any discussion to be had about 10 not being the right age?
(19:45):
What is the right age? Never just have the conversation outside of the bathroom have the real
Conversation about what it's like if you're mom. Let's just if you're mom right now
Okay, and she was younger. Let's say she was in there. It was like I think I'm pregnant
Like come in the bathroom watch me pee and let's see if I let's see if I'm like hold on sorry
(20:08):
Like are you gonna go watch your mom pee? I've seen my mom pee, but are
The women are women are built different. I've seen every inch of all of my sisters and my mom
So I see no problem. It's but just think about girls all go into the bathroom together. They do that
Oh, yeah, we grew up doing that. That's like stall
(20:29):
Uh, yes, you don't even want to know the things that us girls do in the stall. Yeah, y'all weird
Yeah, like weird. I don't know. I just see I yeah
I just I think it's just the difference between men and women and you guys can think it's weird
But we can think that it's not so weird. I think I'd be upset. Well, everybody thinks it's an asshole
So like you don't need to show our daughter
(20:52):
You don't need to show our daughter you pissing
Even if it is to like see if you're pregnant or not, they don't need to watch you pee shut the door
When you are doing that what you're supposed to do, which I'm figured this is what she did is you're supposed to pee in like a
Clean like cup or things like that first
So it's not like she's just paying on a stick her legs are like she's you have to be very
(21:16):
like
Positioned correctly to get it in the cup. Okay, and then that's a fact by the way because since potty training
I'm like, hey, you got to get in here and teach this girl how to aim this thing
Like it just goes wherever it wants like there's no way to
Like you can't use your hand to move it
(21:38):
anyway
So she's like so it's not like she's overly exposed to her 10 year old daughter
That's not but I still think she's hanging in a cup and then you take it out
Then you get the stick and then you put in them. So you literally you're just in there doing doing the lab experiment like
(21:58):
Yeah, I don't know I'm with you. I it feels it feels a little weird
It's a little weird. I'm not mad about it. It's just weird
It she said I probably would do it with Ila
I'm sure you good and I would just hear about it and be like cool
You guys you guys have your bond and I'm just the dad. I'm
So glad that she was in there for that. Let me know if I'm needed for anything
(22:22):
Nope, you did your job
Then I'll just steer clear you're relieved of your duty
There's this one comment that says you do realize your daughter could start her period any day now or any time in the next two years
And all your wife did was pee on a stick and talk about hormones and fertility cycles
I'm Betty you're the asshole 10 is not too young my oldest started sex ed and puberty talks at 10 in school
(22:43):
Yeah, I remember that like fifth grade. We literally had the sex talk. Okay, so one part of this way different
Okay, I have I have a thing this is important girls have to figure out how to do like tampons and stuff when a 10 year old or 11 12 year old
Yeah, this is revelatory. This is why we don't understand your guys is weirdness
(23:05):
Is because that think about they have to go into much more like anatomy stuff than we ever do like for us
It's when we're little kids like your balls drop just aiming and get it in the toilet and wipe the sea if you miss
That's the only that's the only
Okay, so that just occurred to me because I'm a dude of dudes so like
(23:25):
The whole period thing that changes the whole game and now all of a sudden it's a little bit less weird
Thanks to the comment. Yeah, but it's not like she's showing her like that you think she's showing her her period
Like this is what it looks like when I period now
You are taking this like so like you're acting like this mom is just a nasty now
I think she's just I think it's just really weird. It's but think about it
(23:47):
What do you think the Congress just don't answer this but think what do you think the conversation is like when a mom has to
Teach a daughter how to use a tampon that's way different than like here come watch me piss
That's the thing is it's actually not that different if you think about it
It's just like it's not the mom is not her intention was not to show her daughter how she pees
So why didn't the mom just go pee put in the cup and then say we don't know that that's not what she did
(24:11):
We don't know that that's not what she did that guy
But he wouldn't be that upset then if that was the case
He's thinking of it the way that we were thinking of it like not thinking that girls are freaking different and weird
Maybe he's jealous of their bond and that he's projecting. No, that's crazy. I've never heard that before
(24:32):
This one comes from a new subreddit to the pod
I'm actually excited because I found this and I read so many crazy freaking stories from it
But for the sake of this the subreddit is called am I overreacting am I overreacting for not getting over my wife threatening our children's lives
This happened about nine months ago, and I'm still struggling to move past it
(24:52):
My wife has a temper when she gets angry she tends to scream yell and say deeply hurtful things
These outbursts don't happen all the time
But when they do she often ends up not speaking to friends or family for months due to the fallout during this particular
Incident she was going through intense withdrawals from heavy marijuana use. She's experienced this a few times before
It's quite severe with vomiting sweating and more at this time
(25:14):
She's extremely difficult to be around angry about everything and trying to control everyone around her
We were discussing her situation and it quickly escalated. She mentioned feeling suicidal and unable to keep living
Then she said this sentence that changed everything for me, and this is in quotations. Don't worry if I kill myself
I'm taking the kids with me, then you will be all alone
(25:35):
She said this with a sinister sneer and was very lucid at that moment. I disassociated
I tried to get her to stop yelling but couldn't I don't remember much of the rest of the day
I've previously confided in her that my biggest fear growing up was my psychotic stepdad losing it and killing my entire family
So this hit me especially hard
I'm terrified of not protecting my kids from abuse like my mom couldn't protect me nine months later
(25:57):
If I try to bring up what she said she explodes and calls me a liar. She adamantly claims she never felt that way
I'm not sure if she was just trying to hurt me or what I understand
She was in a bad place when she said it but now I worry she won't tell me if she feels that way again
There have been other troubling conversations. She's convinced that if an apocalypse happens
She'll kill herself and the kids. This was a huge wake-up call for me
(26:18):
I started going to therapy and convinced her to go to marriage counseling
We've gone through two counselors since then she blew up at both and refused to go back
I didn't bring up the specific threat and counseling because she made a huge deal about me not mentioning it
Our sessions were generally miserable as we couldn't agree on basic facts of our daily life either
She's manipulative can't remember things said when she's angry or I'm an unreliable narrator of my own life
(26:40):
Since then I've seen a lot of self-improvement. My anxiety is much lower
I'm better at standing up for myself and my children and I'm getting out more to see friends something
I was too nervous to do before my wife has improved to her explosions happen less often the threats are less severe and she's been
On better behavior. I've made it clear that I'm unsure if we can make things work
My wife wants me to forgive forget and move on
(27:01):
She has a point the only thing stopping us from getting along now is my hesitation to fully commit
But I'm scared she broke my trust and getting close again risks more hurt
This wasn't the only incident just the one that opened my eyes if it weren't for the kids
I would have left long ago, but I don't want to see them less. I think I trust her with them
She's a good mom despite her anger issues. The last thing I want is a court battle
(27:23):
My dad lost custody of me in one of those. I feel pretty stuck. Am I overreacting? No, no, no, no, no
She on met like he you cannot be he said I'm sorry. That's bad parenting like that
his
Those children are unsafe with her around. She needs to be on medication. She needs to be in therapy
(27:45):
She needs to get like evaluated
No one is saying something like that unless they mean it
More than once and he needs to tell someone
The fact that she said I'll go but you can't talk about that to a therapist
That's yeah, she you know that's been on the back of her mind today. Yeah, that's not okay
I felt sick reading like listening to that honestly
(28:08):
It's like that one story of the lady that like took each kid to the bathroom and like kill them all
Remember that or the mom that drove her kids into the lake. Yeah, like
Stuff like that's what that reminded me of that's creepy
Well, that's funny that he says that that he's hung up on like these comments
But then he's like but I trust her with them and she's a good mom
(28:29):
I'm like you obviously do not trust her with them if you're still really hung up on this comment
And you think that like oh like maybe she would do that. So I don't know
I think he's but obviously you want to see the best in like your spouse and I think he's just scared to leave her
Oh, yeah, he has no backbone. He's like I'm starting to get a backbone. No, it's like what it what like is she the breadwinner?
(28:51):
Like what is it that you're like afraid to leave? Well, I don't want to see the kids in a left
It doesn't have to have anything to do with money. It can literally just be like personality type
She's obviously a much more dominant like headstrong personality and that's like opposite to track
That's probably why they got together to begin with he absolutely your eyes. I say you're right
(29:12):
He needs to tell someone because and by someone a professional. I mean dog told the whole internet. So
Anonymously doesn't count. I also think he needs to if he did divorce her though
The problem is is that she's gonna have the kids alone and she would for 50% of the time and she'd say if you leave me
I'm gonna blah blah like that sucks. Yeah, so what is he actually supposed to do?
(29:36):
He's got to tell a professional like so we're saying that's the best option is he needs to to take her to
inpatient like
Mental hospital she would spy on you imagine. Yeah, she'd lose her shit. She'd have to go in there and handcuffs like perfect
Yeah, I just think you would have to tell a cops that like this is what she said because then they have to like investigate
(29:58):
That's the problem though
You have to do it at the time because in nine months after the fact is not the time to be like hey
Police officers my wife said this a long time ago and she was depressed and in a fit of rage
And I can't get over it and we still fight and she wears the pants in our relationship
So yeah, she's doing a little better now. You should have weed just try to fire her up one more time
(30:19):
Yeah, see that's manipulative
Get her fired up one more time and then have the cops on speed dial. Yeah
It's really sad like here's the thing but if you're that stressed do it
Do it takes it's crazy because not being in the situation
It's easy for us to be like oh dude like you should have done this
(30:40):
But if you really try to put yourself in his shoes, yeah, that sucks
That's a hard freakin situation to be in where like obviously he's built a life with this woman
He loves her and like he wants to see her be at her best like you
When she said that horrible thing she was at her very worst with her mental health, so
That's obviously no excuse and I think the right thing would have been for him to consult authorities
(31:04):
Immediately because you can't risk it. You can't risk your kids life. It's like that's too important and we I mean
We all watch 2020 we see the dark stuff that happens in the world that sucks
I just I feel so bad for this dude and I really I think he needs to get out of this relationship, but
But he can't right. No, it's like it. I think that the move is at this point nine months in
(31:28):
Right now. I think the move is is to leave and to try to do it as healthily as possible
That's what I think right now. There's I think nine months or not. He still needs to tell authorities better
Now than ever, but yeah again, it's like if you tell the authorities all it's gonna do is make rage monster lady mad because
They're not gonna do anything. What are they gonna do about something that happened nine months ago that there's no proof of he needs to look at her
(31:54):
Google search history there could be some crazy stuff in there or she she covers her tracks
Well, and she's she's planning the end of everything and no one's gonna know probably doesn't though cover her tracks
If she wears the pants in the relationship
She's like I can walk all over and he's never gonna look at anything
Yeah, she'll just steamroll him if you're gonna want to try yeah, so he's got to like figure a way to like make her sleep a little longer
(32:18):
Dude, she oh drug her good good idea
Hi, babe
Listen Michael I really feel bad for this dude. This is my favorite comment. This woman is insanely abusive
You need to bring up the repeated threats in therapy the fact that she doesn't want you mentioning it means she knows exactly what she said and she
(32:39):
Refuses to take accountability for it. She's trying to make you feel responsible for protecting her reputation
When she's making horrific threats specifically to hurt you knowing your trauma
I hope you get out of this situation soon. You deserve better
Side note. I smoked marijuana heavily daily for 20 years and have been on and off of it several times in the past four years
(33:00):
Withdrawal does not make you abusive. She chooses to be like this. I'm so sorry for what you're going through
I wouldn't wish this level of abuse on anyone
She thought that was an important little that's really good. That's a good comment. Yeah, she's just sucks. She's the worst
I like really him. He needs to get out
Yes, it just sucks because she could get 50% and then what think about how the world is effed
(33:26):
Like not to be a doomsday or but like what is the actual right answer?
Because if he just leaves her then like you said the judicial system is gonna make it so that she has those kids 50% of the
Time in a weird way
He has to stay to try to protect his kids because he's in such a bad situation otherwise
Yeah, he's really those right now because then there would be her alone
(33:46):
And she could just do anything because he's not gonna get full custody
He's literally his life is gonna be trying to make her happy
So she doesn't kill herself and the kids that is a horrible life to live
That's but do again. What what can you even do?
Am I the asshole for making my daughter take a break from going to her best friend's house because the mom purposely
(34:07):
Bought her a smaller size dress about two weeks ago
My 14-year-old daughter Bonnie was out shopping with her best friend Gigi and Gigi's mom Lauren while they were out
Lauren bought them both dresses. She thought were cute except she bought Bonnie a size three Bonnie said she picked out one
That was her size but Lauren put it back and said that the size three one would be her
Aspirational dress to work towards fitting into when she came home. She gave it to me and was upset
(34:32):
But also didn't want to say anything bad about Gigi's mom which I get first off Bonnie is a healthy girl
Gymnastics until she was about 11 and grew several inches dance in the fall and track in the spring all her choices
She's got an athletic build
Gigi is a small girl barely five feet and so I thought at first she got them mixed up
She told me that Gigi's mom got it for her to aspire to try to get into by working hard
(34:56):
I said I take care of it and get her the right size the next day
I called Gigi's mom Lauren and asked her why she would do that
She explained that she thought it would give Bonnie something to work towards because she heard Bonnie saying she didn't get asked out last year
But Gigi had several boys after her and then it seemed like it upset her
I told her it was inappropriate and asked her why she would tell a kid
She needed to lose weight in order to get attention from boys
She got defensive and said that it was obviously embarrassing for Bonnie to not have boys into her when all her friends do
(35:21):
She basically said I'm holding Bonnie back from growing up like I won't help her with boys won't drop hundreds at Sephora
They'll dress her like a kid and buy
B&BW sprays instead of fancy perfumes said it's messing with Bonnie socially and that she's the only one in her friend group
Who hasn't had a boyfriend then she got personal and said just because I've given up and stopped trying
Doesn't mean I have to turn Bonnie into a nun for the record that is partially true
(35:46):
But it's also because Bonnie doesn't want that stuff
I have offered to get her more instead of fill skincare and she doesn't want it
She got straight A's last year and I took her to Ulta for a spree and all she wanted was some lip gloss and then asked for the body spray instead
I said that it's time for a break the girls can still hang out
But I don't want Bonnie at Gigi's house Bonnie got upset over it and I can deal with that Gigi's mom
(36:08):
However has gotten nuclear over it spreading poison everywhere she can about me being psycho and doubling down on Hall it's all because I don't want my
Daughter to be happy with a boyfriend when I'm single and no man would touch me
Which is just childish and I've been shocked to see how other people have reacted to this
So now I'm questioning my own parenting which I never do am I the asshole?
(36:29):
Oh my gosh, yeah, Lauren is a bad mom. That's how you don't be a parent
Got it noted don't buy a dress. That's too small for a girl is a nice gesture like
Try a little harder in your own kid either. No, it's like it'd be yeah, there's no good way
(36:50):
If you want not mine don't fat shame don't fat shame any kid, but definitely okay unless it's really bad
Then I'm not gonna shame them, but like I definitely am gonna like
Make them work out. This is like do five ten push ups
Dude just wait bro. You're you're gonna put on some dad weight in no time and like I know but my kids
(37:16):
Listen bro, all right, how about you just
Actions speak louder than words. There's more to life. Here's the thing get them interested in sports and then it all takes care of itself
Yeah, exactly. Yeah, but then again, it's like what if they are a little bit thicker?
What if your son's alignment? It's fine. Oh, they're perfect be alignment, but it's like I want them to be healthy
Yeah, but
(37:37):
Lawrence a hoe good episode guys. I'm loving it how not to be a parent
Like people are gonna get heated
About what just like listening to other stories. Oh, we had to say that was a fun episode
Thanks for listening. Give us a rate on your favorite podcasting app watch us on YouTube
Drop a comment on socials. We love you
(37:59):
Love you
Francis on 3123 please don't say
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