Love Factually

Love Factually

We're just two professors standing in front of a rom-com, asking it to be the subject of our podcast. Paul Eastwick and Eli Finkel explain what your favorite romantic films get right -- and wrong -- about the science of romance. Because it's time for scientists to take Ryan Gosling as seriously as you do.

Episodes

July 7, 2025 52 mins

Are mismatched couples doomed? Why is it essential to calibrate our expectations? What happens when we seek closure on past relationships? Paul and Eli revisit High Fidelity—the seminal text that proclaimed “What really matters is what you like” —and find themselves on a semi-traumatic trip down memory lane.

For show notes, click here.

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What happens when we treat dating like a business proposition? How important is height in determining a man’s desirability? If love isn’t “the math,” then what is it? Paul and Eli race from Celine Song’s Materialists to the recording booth, hoping to make sense of the modern dating landscape.

For show notes, click here.

Hosted, produced, and edited by Paul Eas...

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June 9, 2025 54 mins

Is romantic love like an addiction? What is the nature of anti-gay prejudice? How do people come to understand their own sexual identity? Paul and Eli revisit “Brokeback Mountain” in preparation for its 20-year theatrical re-release, while marveling at some truly legendary performances.

For show notes, click here.

Hosted, produced, and edited by Paul Eastwick ...

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June 2, 2025 52 mins

The first Love Factually Deep Dive! Grand romantic gestures pervade romance films. Are they effective? Are they sometimes unethical? Cornell professor Vanessa Bohns (You Have More Influence Than You Think) and bestselling author Dan Pink (The Power of Regret) join Paul and Eli for a freewheeling discussion that reaches some unexpected conclusions.

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May 26, 2025 43 mins

What are the risks of being a people pleaser? Why do weddings fall apart? Why is it so important to be authentic in relationships? Paul and Eli try on “27 Dresses” (and decode some Elton John lyrics) in pursuit of some insights.

For show notes, click here.

Hosted, produced, and edited by Paul Eastwick and Eli Finkel.

Music by Andrew F...

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May 12, 2025 47 mins

What’s special about sibling relationships? How do people with different attachment styles cope with stress? Why is it risky to get engaged to somebody you met that day? The megahit Frozen—starring the inimitable Kristen Bell and Idina Menzel—flips the traditional Disney script and offers some answers.

This is a clean episode - suitable for all ages!

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The first Love Factually mailbag episode! Eli and Paul answer your questions about friends-first relationships, wedding stress, and memory erasure. Plus, we reopen the debate: When do relationships benefit from therapy, and why?

See the graph of friends-first relationships

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April 28, 2025 52 mins

What happens when we view marriage in terms of winning and losing? How does divorce affect children? What are the consequences of taking a relationship for granted? Paul and Eli sift through the wreckage in Marriage Story, Noah Baumbach’s lacerating, multiple-Oscar-nominated masterpiece starring Adam Driver and Scarlett Johansson.

For show notes, click here.

H...

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April 14, 2025 49 mins

Can interactions with strangers fulfill our need to belong? Does ironic detachment mask attachment insecurity? Should we try to change ourselves into somebody else’s ideal partner? Paul and Eli immerse themselves, again and again, in Groundhog Day, the timeless philosophical redemption tale starring Bill Murray and Andie MacDowell.

For show notes, click here.

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In this special crossover episode of the Dateable podcast, Paul and Eli chat with hosts Julie Krafchick and Yue Xu about how people should - and shouldn't - apply lessons from the movies to their dating lives.  

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March 31, 2025 47 mins

Is striving to avoid mistakes a good romantic strategy? Can couples who are mismatched on hotness get together? Does relationship success require that you be a desirable person? Paul and Eli dust off Hitch, the 2005 rom-com vehicle for Will Smith and Eva Mendes, in search of answers.

For show notes, click here.

Hosted, produced, and edited by Paul Eastwick and...

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March 17, 2025 46 mins

How does it feel to confront hard relationship choices? How can we truly listen to one another? What counts as infidelity? Paul and Eli unpack Before Sunset—the sequel to Before Sunrise—which features Jesse (Ethan Hawke) and Céline (Julie Delpy) unexpectedly reunited in Paris, confronting the past and changing the future.

For show notes, click here.

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March 3, 2025 48 mins

How can people navigate the “friendzone”? Do men need romantic relationships more than women do? Does confusion about one’s identity undermine relationships? Paul and Eli search for answers in the 2023 film Barbie, Greta Gerwig’s feminist fantasia featuring Margot Robbie and Ryan Gosling.

For show notes, click here.

Hosted, produced, and edited by Paul Eastwic...

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February 17, 2025 46 mins

Why is it so important to be able to celebrate with someone? Is parenting sexy? What are the challenges of being in a relationship when you don’t know who you are? Paul and Eli search for answers in the 1996 film Jerry Maguire, Cameron Crowe’s endlessly quotable rom-com, featuring acclaimed performances from Renée Zellweger, Tom Cruise, and Cuba Gooding Jr.

For show notes, click here.

...

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In this special crossover episode of The Happiness Lab podcast, Paul and Eli chat with Laurie Santos about lessons learned from fact-checking rom-coms. 

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February 3, 2025 59 mins

What are the benefits of optimism? How do people transfer attachments from parents to romantic partners? What exactly counts as stalking? Paul and Eli team up with Laurie Santos (Yale professor and host of The Happiness Lab podcast) to dive into the nice-guy manifesto Say Anything, starring (sigh) John Cusack and Ione Skye.

For show notes, click here.

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January 20, 2025 55 mins

How does a transactional mindset undermine relationship well-being? What’s the nature of stereotypes? How can we tie our hands to achieve our goals? Paul and Eli invite Katy Milkman (Wharton professor and host of the Choiceology podcast) to discuss Pretty Woman, a Cinderella tale featuring Julia Roberts in a star-making performance.

For show notes, click here.

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In this special crossover episode of the Sex and Psychology podcast, Paul and Eli chat with Justin Lehmiller about how sex and relationships are depicted in movies. 

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January 6, 2025 52 mins

Does the double standard linger for men and women? What exactly is sex positivity? Do people make unfounded assumptions about self-esteem and casual sex? Paul and Eli join forces with Justin Lehmiller (host of the Sex and Psychology Podcast) to discuss Easy A, the teen comedy adaptation of Hawthorne’s The Scarlet Letter.

For show notes, click here.

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December 23, 2024 55 mins

What does jealousy do to a person? How are relationships interwoven with identity? What are the many forms of sex and sexual desire? Paul and Eli welcome in special guest Peter Sagal (host of NPR’s Wait Wait…Don’t Tell Me!) to chat about Eyes Wide Shut, Stanley Kubrick’s eternally fascinating swan song.

For show notes, click here.

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