Godly Relationships: Part One

What happens when we strip away cultural expectations and examine marriage through a purely biblical lens? The answers might challenge everything you thought you knew about relationships.

In this eye-opening episode, Walter and Shanea tackle the foundations of godly relationships with refreshing honesty, addressing misconceptions that have infiltrated even the most devout Christian circles. They dive deep into Genesis to uncover God's original blueprint for marriage – revealing that it was never about solving loneliness or providing an outlet for sexual desire, but fulfilling a divine purpose that two specific people were created to accomplish together.

"If you are married to someone God never intended for you to be with, you're walking in an ADULTEROUS marriage," they boldly assert, challenging listeners to reconsider what makes a marriage truly godly. This isn't about legalities but about divine design – were you brought together by God's hand or your own desires?

The conversation takes a particularly powerful turn when addressing husbands. "Men, we show up to our marriage to DIE to self," Walter explains, dismantling toxic masculine leadership models. "Many men think they're leaders when actually they're nothing more than DICTATORS. Leaders serve; dictators demand to be served." This reframing of biblical leadership as sacrificial service rather than control revolutionizes our understanding of Ephesians 5.

For singles, they offer wisdom about the critical "wilderness season" of preparation, explaining why this time of refinement is essential before entering marriage. Whether you're single, dating, engaged or married for decades, this episode will transform your understanding of relationships by replacing cultural myths with biblical truth.

Ready to discover what God truly designed marriage to be? This conversation might just save your relationship – or prevent you from entering the wrong one.

Ready to dive deeper? 🎧 Join us on YouTube for the full video podcast where we explore faith, love, and relationships through a Christian lens. Whether married, single, or seeking spiritual growth, our episodes offer practical advice and profound insights to strengthen your walk with Jesus. Don’t forget to subscribe and hit the notification bell so you never miss a powerful episode. Let’s grow together in faith and purpose!
👉 Watch the full episode on YouTube now!

Episode Transcript

WALTER (00:00):
Welcome back to another episode of Stepping in Faith,
where, together, we explore theimportance of having a
relationship with God and howthat relationship with God can
impact the relationship you havewith others.
I'm your host, walter.
I'm joined here alongside mylovely wife.

SHANEA (00:14):
Shanea.

WALTER (00:17):
This is episode 16.
Yeah.
We're doing it right now.
Okay, welcome back everyone.
First thing I would say is thatwe are believers and we are
here, and, even though the enemyhas been trying to come at us,
still we rise, yeah, and so Ithink we'll get started.

(00:43):
Babe, you want to pray, or youwant me to pray?

SHANEA (00:46):
I'll pray.

WALTER (00:47):
It's my turn to pray.
It is.

SHANEA (00:49):
Okay, father, you are a glorious God and we thank you
and we give you all the gloryand we give you all the honor
and we give you all the praise,and we speak against any demonic
forces trying to come upagainst this podcast, trying to
come up against us.
Speak against any demonicforces trying to come up against
this podcast, trying to come upagainst us.
We ask you, holy Spirit, thatyou will open up our mouths and
speak the words that people needto hear.

(01:10):
In Jesus' name, we pray, amen.

WALTER (01:13):
Amen, amen, amen.
Let's make sure this is good.
All right, this is episode 16.
And what's this week's title?

SHANEA (01:28):
godly relationships godly relationships.

WALTER (01:32):
The enemy has been battling us not to put this out,
which is why I am even morecommitted to continuing on with
this podcast and doing what Godhas called us to do.
And so, babe, I am proud of you.
My wife has been under somewarfare lately, but we have been

(01:55):
praying and God has beenkeeping us in the midst of
everything going on.
Just to kind of put thisdisclaimer out when you decide
to come up against the kingdomof darkness, the enemy is going
to try to come, but that's whenyou know that you're doing
something.
And this is, even as we'retouching on God, godly

(02:16):
relationships.
One of the things that we knowis so true is that when you
start doing the things that Godhas called you to be or do, and
being where God has called youto be, you start dealing with
warfare from outside, but God isgreat and God is amazing and he
has kept us, and we are evenmore committed to dropping each

(02:41):
episode, week after week, andremaining committed.
At some point we'll be able toshare our testimony.
The Father has not released usto share as of yet, but at some
point we'll be able to share ourtestimony, to really kind of
provide some insight on some ofthe things that we've had to
deal with and how the enemy,consistently, has been coming up

(03:03):
against us ever since we'vestarted this podcast, week after
week, trying to stop us fromputting these episodes out, week
after week, trying todiscourage us.
But we are committed and we arefaithful and, holy Spirit, we
worship and magnify you, weglorify your name, we honor you

(03:24):
and we thank you for the graceto continue to do what you've
called us to do, because we knowthat there's people that need
to hear this message, there'speople that need to hear these
episodes.
So we will remain committed towhat you've called us to do.
We thank you for your presence,we thank you for your joy, we
thank you for your peace and wethank you that this will get to

(03:44):
those that you've called it toget to.
In the name of Jesus, we pray.
Lord, jesus, we welcome youhere.
We acknowledge the angels ofthe Lord that's in the room even
now.
It's in Jesus' name.
We pray, amen, amen.
Let's get to it.
So, yes, but God, yes, but Godis good, god is good, you good,

(04:10):
babe.
Would it be anything that youwant to say?

SHANEA (04:16):
No, okay, I think you said it.
You said enough.

WALTER (04:21):
So please know that, as we are going through these
episodes, sometimes it may show,sometimes it may not we may, we
?
We be tired, uh, we.
Sometimes we grow weary of thewarfare, uh.
Yet we remain committed.
When there is a a sense ofurgency, when there's a sense of

(04:43):
conviction, there's nothingthat can stop us from doing what
god has called us to do, whichis why we remain faithful to
doing what he's called us to do.
So, yeah, yeah, as you try topossess the land, you have to
come up against giants yes, butthey're nothing in comparison to
the grace of god, the power ofGod, the power of our Lord Jesus

(05:06):
, our Lord and Savior, jesusChrist.
They try to make it seem theyroar, but there is no weapons
that is formed against you thatwill prosper when you are doing
what God has called you to do,the only thing they try to when
they come up against you.
You know that you are directlywhat God has called you to be
doing, directly what God hascalled you to do.
Yet, once we've we've statedthis before, there's a

(05:28):
difference between warfare fromwithin because of you being
disobedient, or there's adifference between you dealing
with the consequences to thedecisions you made, those
moments and times when youdisobey God, versus warfare from
your obedience.
Yeah.
And there's grace in the midstof that when you are dealing

(05:51):
with warfare from your obedience.
So this week, our focus rightnow is digging into
understanding the biblicalprinciples of relationships and
marriages, focusing on thefoundational truths of what make

(06:12):
a marriage godly and the rolesthat those individuals play
within that framework.
That's our focus today.
Godly relationships wassomething that just came to me
it was random once again, but itjust came that God wanted us to
touch on godly relationships.
I know that there were somequestions that people had.

(06:33):
Hopefully this answers some ofyour questions, but I think it's
important to understand what agodly relationship or godly
marriage looks like, becauseit's easy to uh, misconstrue a

(06:53):
marriage and assume one.
Is that?
When it's not, what are yourthoughts about that, babe?

SHANEA (07:00):
no, I think that's true.
It's no different than whenyou're seeing leaders in the
church and you think they havethe Holy Spirit, but they don't.
Their fruits don't show.

WALTER (07:14):
What's that scripture?

SHANEA (07:15):
Their fruits don't show that they have a godly character
.
A form of godliness, and sopeople portray their marriages
like they're godly.
But, when you actually dig intoall the roots when you dig into
how they form theirrelationship, when you dig into
the dynamics of theirrelationship, there's no fruit.

(07:36):
It's all a facade, it's allfake.
Yeah.
Honestly.
It's just honestly, like justfor show, or it's just doing
things out of religious practice.
It's doing things out of youknow what culture has taught you
, what tradition has taught you.

(07:57):
So you go to church and youmight have a sermon and this
preacher sound just like thenext preacher.
You sound like another preacher.
They all yelling, they are you,you know, breathing all hard.
They all got that.

WALTER (08:08):
That's gonna be loud you put all that in there, okay,
geez wife getting carried awaybut you know, it's just a form
of godliness and it's yeah, theyum.
So and I I believe what wewould have to do, because I
found the scripture.
Yeah.
But let me do NIV instead.

(08:29):
Niv says that, let's see.
It says having a form of thisis 2 Timothy 3 and 5, having a
form of godliness, but denyingits power, having nothing to do
with such people.
So we dig further in.
We'll start at verse 3.

(08:49):
It says you should know this.
Oh, verse 1, I'm sorry.
2 Timothy 3, chapter 3, verse 1through 5.
And this is the NLT that we'rereading and we're going on a
tangent.
But, you should know this,timothy, that in the last days
there will be very difficulttimes, for people will love only
themselves and their money.

(09:09):
They will be boastful and proud, scoffing at God, disobedient
to their parents and ungrateful.
They will consider nothingsacred.
They will be unloving andunforgiving.
They will slander others andhave no self-control.
They will be cruel and hatewhat is good.
They will betray their friends,be reckless, be puffed up with
pride and love pleasure ratherthan God.

(09:30):
They will act religious butthey will reject the power that
could make them godly.
Stay away from people like that.
That is once again 2 Timothy 3,verse 1 through 5.
That kind of dives into whatyou were just saying.
Yeah.

(09:57):
The importance of understandingthat there is a difference
between those who act as if theyhave a relationship with God,
or act as if it's a godlymarriage, or act as if it's a
marriage that God has broughttogether Right Act, as if it was
God who put them together, whenit's not.

SHANEA (10:05):
It's not.

WALTER (10:06):
And they may be doing all the right stuff.
All the things may look likethat is leading up to that point
, but that's not the case.

SHANEA (10:12):
Yeah, we've seen so many videos about on relationships,
on the how God brought themtogether, and then we look at
how they came together and youhear them more than anything.
Look at how they came togetherand you hear them more than
anything, and you hear them sayI did this, I did that, I did
that, and nowhere do you hearGod showed me that this was my
wife.
God showed me this was myhusband.

WALTER (10:34):
And this is why you have to have an understanding about
marriage, or of marriage from abiblical perspective, but a true
biblical perspective.
So the key thing is not justreading your scripture, but
having a revelation, by way ofthe Holy Spirit, everything that
we have taught, on everythingthat we've discussed.
The only reason we know thisstuff is because of the Holy

(10:56):
Spirit.

SHANEA (10:56):
I knew nothing.

WALTER (10:58):
I am not.
I'm not even going to act likeI'm the smartest person.

SHANEA (11:00):
We were over here looking at the blue pill, red
pill community, trying to figureit out ourselves, trying to
figure it out ourselves, tryingto figure it out.

WALTER (11:06):
Separately, when we weren't together.

SHANEA (11:07):
Yeah.

WALTER (11:08):
And so it's only by the spirit of God that we have been
given these revelations.
Yet I think it's so importantto say that there's nothing
special about us.
We are just believers who haveliterally committed our lives to
serving God.
So this is the very samerevelations we have you can
receive too, and that there is aspecific purpose that God has

(11:31):
designed for each and every oneof your lives, that no one out
there is better or greater thanyou.
Everyone can have access to theFather.
Everyone can have a personalrelationship with the Father.
Where you experience hearingHis voice, where you experience
seeing Him move in your life,it's possible for everybody.

SHANEA (11:48):
Right, because Paul says we're all part of the body.

WALTER (11:51):
I don't know what scripture that is and Paul also
said don't think higher ofyourself than you actually are,
and so one of the things that Iguess we can start off with is 1
Corinthians 12.12, if y'allwant to read it.
So let's start off discussingthe cultural misconception that

(12:17):
marriage is about sex and howthat leads to issues, because
there is this thing within thebody of Christ that's teaching
people, or this doctrine that'steaching people, based off of 1
Corinthians 7, that they shouldget married simply because

(12:39):
they're struggling with theirflesh.

SHANEA (12:42):
With their flesh, or that you started being in a
relationship with someone thatwas not based off of whether God
led you to this person, but,more so, your flesh led you to
this person.
Now you're lusting after thisperson.
You want to kiss this person.

(13:02):
You want to have sex with thisperson.

WALTER (13:06):
You think you have good chemistry, but it's really just
lust, it's lust, so it's a lackof self-control.
You don't want to live in sin.

SHANEA (13:12):
So let's just get married.
Yeah.

WALTER (13:16):
So that is a that is a major issue and my my earpiece
keeps coming out of my ear, butthat is a major issue within the
body of Christ and we have toaddress that.
That is not the case.
First of all, let me be clear.
Please read 1 Corinthians 7 inits entirety.

SHANEA (13:33):
Yes.

WALTER (13:34):
We have a whole hour podcast to go.
We really don't have time toread it.

SHANEA (13:44):
But you will see when you read it that there are
moments in time where Paul isstating that it is Paul speaking
and not God.
But you have to be led by theSpirit of God, because we've
read this, but my first timereading I was heavy and I was
wholly inconsecrated.
I wasn't listening or doinganything else but reading my
Bible, and I came across thisrevelation that when Paul is
speaking, he's saying that he isspeaking.
These are his thoughts.

(14:05):
He even says these are mythoughts, not a command from God
.

WALTER (14:12):
And that was you know we was.
I forgot we was coming backfrom Florida.
When we were reading that, yeah, and when God provided the
revelation that it was Paulspeaking, making it clear it was
Paul, it was like dang, it'sPaul speaking.
Paul made it clear, Neverreally thought about the fact.
Thought about it and peoplewill spute you down, but Paul
made it clear there's moments intime that he said this was a.
He spoke on not getting adivorce and that was from God.

(14:33):
Yes, oh, absolutely, but onceagain, and you're not going to
like this, but that is in thecontext of being where God has.
Let's go ahead and dig intosomething that's going to mess
people up real quick.
You can.
Let's say this If you aremarried to the person that God
never intended for you to bewith, you are walking in an

(14:56):
adulterous marriage.

SHANEA (14:57):
Yeah.

WALTER (14:59):
And that's a lot.
Let me say this again If youare married to the person that
God has never intended for youto be with, you are actively
living out a life of adultery.
See, we think adultery is fromthe perspective of you being
married and you cheating on thatperson.
Yes, that is one form.

SHANEA (15:17):
They are not going to like this at all.

WALTER (15:19):
That is one form when you are in the marriage God has
called you to be in.
But we don't understand andthis is not me, this is
literally just havingconversations with the Father
that you people don't realizethat you are married to people
and you are actively committingadultery because you are
somewhere that God has nevercalled for you to be with.

SHANEA (15:41):
Right, you aren't with your Adam and you aren't with
your.

WALTER (15:45):
Eve.
See, it's really distinctive,Like the Bible says, and we are
digging into this right theyain't going to be mad.
It is what it is and, matter offact, we're starting there
anyway, so let's start there.
Genesis 2, 18.
Let's get into it.

SHANEA (16:01):
I hope you guys got your Bible.

WALTER (16:05):
I'm not here to make friends.
You're not going to like.
I'm here to really just dowhatever God has called me to do
, and you're not going to likethis word sometimes.

SHANEA (16:11):
And actually I mean most of the words that we hear,
we're not going to like.
God is a father.
He comes to correct, he blesses, but he also corrects you.
If he didn't correct you, hewould not love you.

WALTER (16:25):
Yes.

SHANEA (16:26):
Your parents don't love you if they don't correct you
and discipline you.

WALTER (16:29):
And there are things that God really gave to us.
It was hard for me to takethose words in.
It convicted me.
I didn't want to believe it, Ididn't want to accept it, but I
had to accept it.

SHANEA (16:42):
He will tell you some things about yourself and you
have to deal with it.

WALTER (16:46):
You do.
And so Genesis 2, beginning atverse 18, the Bible says right,
this is the New LivingTranslation, it says.
Then the Lord God said it isnot good for the man to be alone
.
I will make a helper who isjust right for him.
So the Lord God formed from theground all the wild animals and

(17:09):
all the birds of the sky.
He brought them to the man tosee what he would call them, and
the man chose a name for eachone.
He gave names to all thelivestock, all the birds of the
sky and all the wild animals,but still there was no helper
just right for him.
So the Lord God caused the manto fall into a deep sleep.
While the man slept, the LordGod took out one of the man's

(17:33):
ribs and closed up the opening.
Then the Lord God made a womanfrom the rib and he brought her
to the man At last.
The man exclaimed this one isbone from my bone and flesh.
for my flesh, she will be calledwoman, because she was taken
from man.
This explains why a man leaveshis father and mother and is

(17:55):
joined to his wife and the twoare united into one.
Now, the man and his wife wereboth naked, but they felt no
shame.
There's so much to unpack fromhere.
There's so much to unpack fromhere.
There's so much to unpack fromhere.
We've said this so many timesin the comment section and all.
They were naked and they feltno shame.
Exactly the.

(18:16):
Bible says that God said it wasnot good for man to be alone.
Right now, in this, these fewverses, we see the design that
God initially had for a godlyrelationship.
Yeah, versus we see the designthat God initially had for a
godly relationship.
Yeah, we see God's design formarriage, that God created the
institution of marriage, and theway this looks and the way this
was broken down is how Goddesires for that institution to

(18:39):
look.
It never changed, no, but wehave to understand that the
enemy also recognized this andhe created his own version,
right?
So how does this look?
It starts off right.
God recognizes that that man isalone.
There is a purpose that god hasfor that man.
There are assignments that manhas.
So god says it's not good forthis man to be alone, because I

(19:00):
need him to have a helper toassist him with the assignments
I've given to him, and she willalso have assignments that align
with that man.
Now let's go ahead and get thisout, and we are.
I don't know where we are inthe notes, but let's get this
out.
Husbands, your wife'sassignment is not to serve you.

Speaker 3 (19:26):
Your wife's assignment is not to serve you
and that is your wife yourassignment is not to serve your
husband no, that is part ofbeing a husband and a wife.

WALTER (19:43):
My purpose or let me say like this my purpose, your
purpose, is not to serve your.
What women you weren is not toserve your women.
You weren't designed to serveyour husband.
That's not your outrightpurpose.

SHANEA (19:53):
It wasn't your.
It's not your purpose to serveyour husband's purpose.
No, thank you.
That is what we're trying tosay.

WALTER (19:59):
Yes, it's not your purpose to serve your husband's
purpose, right, husbands.
It's not your purpose to serveyour wife's purpose.

SHANEA (20:05):
Exactly.

WALTER (20:06):
It's not your purpose to serve your wife's purpose.
Exactly, being a husband isbeing a husband.
Being a wife is being a husband.
You guys are one.
Just like being.
It's a role.
Yeah.
Just like being a father or amother is a role.
The unfortunate thing and it'sspecific to women because of how
men approach this, and we'rewrong for this we try to make
women feel like you weredesigned to basically help me

(20:29):
push forth my purpose, yeah, ofwhat god has given to me and
this is why you need the holyspirit when you read the word,
because people will take theword and say help me, as you're
supposed to help me do what godcalled me to do well, see, the
thing, is this right here, uh?

SHANEA (20:49):
but that's not what.

WALTER (20:50):
That's not what the scripture is saying here's where
um the bible says and we'll getback to this genesis 1, verse
26, through 28, verse 26.
Then god said let us make humanbeings in our image, image in
the image of God.
He created them, male andfemale.

(21:24):
He created them.
Then God blessed them.
Then God blessed them and saidbe fruitful and multiply, fill
the earth and govern it, rainover the fish in the sea, the
birds in the sky and all theanimals that scurry along the
ground.
I am so sorry, men, but God hasnot called your wife to be

(21:46):
behind you.
He called your wife to bebeside you.
He called your wife to bebeside you.
He didn't say Adam rule overthe earth.
He didn't say man rule over theearth.
The Bible let's say this againbecause y'all like to talk about
scripture the Bible says thatthen God blessed them and said
be fruitful to them and multiplyto them, fill the earth to them

(22:06):
and govern the earth to them.
Rain over the fish in the seato them.
Fill the earth to them andgovern the earth to them.
Rain over the fish in the seato them, the birds in the sky to
them and all the animals thatscurry along the ground to them.
He said it to them.
That is why the Bible says thatGod removed a rib from the side
of Adam, because Eve has alwaysbeen meant to be, she's always

(22:30):
been meant to be, beside Adam.
They both have a responsibilityto reign.
They both have a responsibilityto rule.
They both have a responsibilityto have dominion.
They both have a responsibilityto govern.
They both have a responsibilityto govern.

(22:51):
Now getting back to where wewere, because that'll take us
off into a different tangentGenesis 18, verse 24.
We see that God said it's notgood for man to be alone.
We see that God stated that hewill make a helper.
That was good for Adam.
We see that God actually putAdam in a deep sleep and God

(23:14):
created Eve for Adam.
There's so much that we couldtake away from this and we will
do a deep dive at some point,but we got to move on for time's
sake.
But the Bible says that, verse24,.
This explains why a man leaveshis father and mother and is
joined to his wife and the twoare united into one.
So and this is not me, I can'ttake credit for any of this this
is only by the Holy Spirit.
You being united into one isnot tied to the marriage itself.

(23:39):
You being united and becomingone is tied to you being where
God had designed for you to be,because God never stopped
removing a rib from that man.
Yeah.
So me getting married to somerandom woman don't make me one
with her.
Me being married to Shaniamakes me one with her.

SHANEA (23:57):
It makes you tied to that person.

WALTER (24:00):
You're tied to them, but you're not one.
You're what the Bible wouldstill consider unequally yoked.

SHANEA (24:07):
Yes.

WALTER (24:08):
You're not one, because God didn't design for me to be
with any other woman out there.

SHANEA (24:12):
People are not going to like this, because people are
going to continue to say Goddesigned marriage.

WALTER (24:17):
God did design marriage he did.
But what we have to remember isthat the enemy mimics
everything that God designs.

SHANEA (24:25):
And people will say well , satan has no, he has no, no
legal rights with marriage.
He hates marriage.

WALTER (24:32):
Satan has no legal rights with anything, but we
gave it to him.

SHANEA (24:35):
Yeah, we did.

WALTER (24:37):
The Bible says that Adam and Eve ate from that tree.
The Bible says that God gaveAdam and Eve dominion over the
earth, yet when they ate fromthat tree, they gave dominion
over to the enemy and governedgovernment.
All the enemy governs.
Now, when you give your life toGod and you go through the
process of dying to self and yougo through the process of

(24:59):
having your mind renewed, nowyou start to begin to walk in
who God has called you to bethrough the power of Christ
Jesus, but that is by submittingevery single area and every
single part of your life to God.
When you don't, those areas thatyou don't submit to God, the
enemy still has.
He's still able to govern overand reign within that area of

(25:19):
your life.
So this right here still isGod's design for marriage.
You can do what you want, butthis is scripture.

SHANEA (25:28):
And you can listen to whoever.

WALTER (25:30):
But this is scripture.
I'm sorry you may not like it,but this is the reality of what
it is.
If you are not in a marriagethat God designed, meaning that
God created you specifically forthat person.
We believe and the Bibleteaches us that there is one
person that God created.
Don't talk to me about anythingoutside the fall of man,
Because when we look at Matthew19, which we will go to again,

(25:55):
the Bible says that God tied us.
Jesus pointed us back toGenesis 2.
So Jesus had an opportunity topoint us to anything.
He didn't point us to Moses, hedidn't point us to the law.
He pointed us to Genesis 2,which was God's original design
for marriage.
And Jesus said in Matthew 19,what God has joined together.

SHANEA (26:19):
Yeah, god has to join you to this person, not you
joining yourself to a person andthen asking God to cover you.
That's not how this works.

WALTER (26:33):
So we're so far off.

SHANEA (26:37):
I think we still kind of on track.

WALTER (26:39):
But we got to get past.
So let's get through some ofthese points.
So let's say this god sawadam's need for a partner and

(27:00):
even though, even though adamhad a relationship with god and
this reveals that marriage ismarriage serves a divine purpose
beyond companionship.
It's something that is divinely, that was divinely created by
God, and marriage is just notabout, it's not just about
avoiding loneliness, butfulfilling a higher purpose.
So marriage is designed by Godand we see this as an.

(27:25):
We see this in Genesis two, andwhen God brings two people
together and I want us to thinkabout this it is to fulfill his
plan.
It's not about y'all being ableto have sex.

SHANEA (27:38):
No.

WALTER (27:39):
It's not about you being able to get your rocks off, I'm
sorry.
It's not about you being ableto get freaky in a bed.

SHANEA (27:45):
Or it's not about you guys building some type of
empire, no or creating a legacy.

WALTER (27:51):
When God created Adam and Eve, when God said that it's
not good for man to be alone,it was because God had something
that he wanted Adam and Eve tofulfill.
The Bible tells us he wantedthem to be fruitful multiply.
He wanted them to fill theearth with godly children, yeah,
images of heaven.
And there's a scripture thattouches on that and I'll see if

(28:13):
I can find it real quick thatcame to mind I think we had it
in another episode.

SHANEA (28:17):
I know you're talking about, but I can't?

WALTER (28:18):
We had talked about the importance of creating godly
children, godly offspring.

SHANEA (28:22):
It's probably in our episode that relationship
covenant.

WALTER (28:25):
And so also he wanted them to govern and reign over
the earth.

SHANEA (28:29):
Yeah, together together.

WALTER (28:32):
so, with that being the case, I'm sorry, but this
tendency to view marriage as asolution to sexual desire or
loneliness, rather than a divinepurpose is very dangerous and
it's incorrect.
It's incorrect and so we haveto deal with, and this is why I

(28:54):
say you should not.
Let me say this.
Please hear me, please hear myheart, because we see it happen
so much in the church.
Do not get married to someonesimply because you want to have
sex, because if you do that,what?
You're?
Starting that marriage off,which you could be where God has
called you to be.
But you are starting thatmarriage off showcasing that you

(29:17):
don't have self-control andit's only but so long that
person will be able to fulfillthat desire before you start
looking elsewhere and dealingwith other issues because you
didn't deal with yourself.
We both show up to a marriageto die.
It's even a greater thing formen.
Actually, with men, we show upto marriage to die.
Men show up, basically, in acoffin.

(29:42):
We're going to dig into therole of men in a second.

Speaker 3 (29:47):
Y'all not going to dig into the role of men in a
second.

WALTER (29:48):
Y'all not gonna like it but it's really important that
we deal with those issues ofself-control, maturity and
spiritual readiness beforeconsidering marriage yeah,
because you, you will go into arelationship selfish, because
you go into a relationship withdesires you're not supposed to

(30:11):
have.
So that's key, and so this digsinto the importance of us both
having our own relationship withGod.
It's very important that we, asmen, have our relationship, yet
I would always recommend womendoing the same, because when you

(30:33):
have the relationship with God,when you have a relationship
with God, you're able todecipher between what is God and
what's not God, especially forwomen.
You can't just be going off aman coming and saying God said
that you are my wife.

SHANEA (30:50):
No.

WALTER (30:52):
Because even with my wife and I, we went through some
stuff, but what I had to do isfall back and allow God to
reveal it to her.
And just to give you all alittle gold nugget, God didn't
reveal it to my wife.
Or you can say how did Godreveal to you?
Or what did you have to do forGod to reveal to you that you

(31:15):
were my wife?
Because I already knew God hadgiven me dreams I had been
praying for and everything.

SHANEA (31:21):
Initially, I would keep asking and what I had to do to
find out for sure.
You are my husband.
I mean, I knew you were myhusband, but I needed
confirmation from the Lord, likea vision or a dream or

(31:41):
something, because I'm a dreamer, so I'm like God.
You got to show me Right.
So the first thing I had to dowas I had to focus on God.
Um, you can and I've seen otherexamples with other people and
how they've come to thisconclusion, and it's the same.
You have to focus on God.

(32:02):
Um, once you seek him, um, youwill find him, and then he will
tell you everything that youneed to know.
He, surely, will tell youeverything you need to know
about who you're supposed to bewith, where you see yourself in
five years, where you seeyourself in the rest of the year
, like what he put you on theearth to do.

(32:23):
He will tell you.
I have a whole list of aconversation we had and he told
me everything that I am to him,everything that I should be to
my husband and my children andto the world the world.

(32:46):
But he showed me my husband,probably I don't remember how
long after my conversion, but itmight have been maybe even a
month or two or three.
God gave me a dream with us atthe altar.
My husband didn't have any hair.

(33:09):
In the dream he was bald.

WALTER (33:12):
I'm bald now.

SHANEA (33:13):
And he's bald now, but at the time he wasn't.

WALTER (33:17):
I was trying to hold on to it.

SHANEA (33:18):
That's crazy, right?
So, like at the time God gaveme this dream, my husband was
not bald, he had a full head ofhair Struggling.

WALTER (33:33):
But we Str, we struggling, but in the dream we
were at the altar and he wasbald and I would say to the men
out there um, god has showed methis for you and I wanted her, I
wanted her so badly to know it.
But what god had, uh, gave tome, and I don't know if you
remember me telling you this.
God told me that he's not goingto say anything to her until

(33:54):
she stops focusing on it.
And he told me specificallydon't bring it back up to her,
don't say anything about it,don't inquire about it or
anything.
Let me show her.
And I knew that he would showher.
I knew that he would show youwhen you went to him and just
focused on him, because evenwith me, god showed me that she

(34:16):
was my wife when I was focusedon him.
So we have certain people thatreach out to us in the comment
section like how you know?
How you know when you go on toGod, god, show me, show me, show
me, show me.
Nine times out of 10, he's notBecause you got to think.
If you have a relationship andGod desires relationship if
you're coming to me and you wantsomething in particular from me
, I might not give it to you,because I want to know that

(34:39):
you're there with me because ofme.
And the more you focus on me andhaving the relationship
together, I'll begin to revealsecrets to you, and that's what
happened with my wife.
So that's why it's so importantto have your own individual
relationship with God and forwomen to not just go off with a
man or a prophet or anyone says,because ideally, prophets

(35:01):
aren't there to tell you thingsthat you don't know.
Prophets are there.
They should come for correctionor they should come to confirm
what God has already showcasedyou Absolutely.
They also come to bring yougood news, sometimes.
Yeah.
But it should be confirmed assomething that was already there
.
You may not have seen it,because my wife may not realize
it and I firmly believe that butbecause of where she was, god

(35:23):
had already revealed this to her, but she was not in the space
to receive it, and so once shegot into a space to receive it,
she was able to receive it.

SHANEA (35:31):
Because I didn't want what God had for me.
No, I just was not in the space.
I asked for God to give me whathe wanted, but I didn't really
mean it.

WALTER (35:40):
And we both struggled with that because we came from a
space where and we can't getinto it, but we both struggled
with that, I struggle with that.
God took me through a processof having to literally die to
self, of having to literally dieto self, and that's something
else to think about.
When I met my wife, I was notdrawn to her physically, I

(36:03):
didn't understand what it was,but it was something within her
spirit.
My wife is beautiful, don't getme wrong, but I was not drawn
to that.
It was something deeper and itwas something that was more
intimately based.
I would always say I can'texplain it, but it's something
within her that caught myattention, and so that is
another point to make that.

(36:25):
I'm sorry, but if your eyes isthe first thing, that, or if
it's your physical eyes thatyou're seeing someone with, you
might want to challenge that,because the Bible lets us know
God told Samuel that you look atthe outward appearance, but I
judge by the heart, and what Godwas showing me was her heart.

SHANEA (36:44):
And he will allow you to make advances in that
relationship or to that personthat you see, that you like.
But then you have to let Godshow you if this is the person
for you, because you alreadyhave a desire.
I was just thinking about theprophet who talked about he
wanted a blonde-haired,blue-eyed girl.

WALTER (37:02):
Yeah, God, I mean that prophet which oh, yeah, yeah,
yeah, and God gave him somethingcompletely different.

SHANEA (37:09):
Oh, absolutely.

WALTER (37:10):
Because God don't care about what you want he don't.
It's more about what he knowswas best for you, mm-hmm.
And he's not driven by yourflesh Right.

SHANEA (37:17):
He tried to pursue that and-.

WALTER (37:19):
And it didn't work out.
It did not.
It did not work out.
Thing um with marriage marriageworks best when both
individuals are secure in theiridentity with christ or in
christ and they're not seekingvalidation from their partner.
Yeah, let's break this down.
Marriage work best when you'renot looking at your partner as

(37:39):
your god.

SHANEA (37:42):
I can't be my wife's god no, you're looking for comfort,
you're looking for securityyou're looking for everything in
your partner, in your spouse.

WALTER (37:51):
You're trying to be with someone because you're seeking
out something that only God cangive you.
That marriage will be.
It will be a struggle.
It will fail because, ladies,your husband can't be your God.
Men, your wives can't be yourgod only god can be your god,
and I think a lot of times,women you can correct me if I'm

(38:12):
wrong it it is easier for awoman to fall into that space of
looking at her husband as hergod yeah, I think, more than men
.

SHANEA (38:20):
So yeah, but no, but a lot of times, you see, men,
depending on some dynamics, butlike prayer and all that stuff.
Yeah, well.

WALTER (38:28):
But I think it's more so women, but I could be wrong.

SHANEA (38:36):
No, it can be men too, though I've seen quite a few men
.
Because, the thing is is ifyou're in a relationship and you
feel convicted about doingsomething because your spouse
might get mad at you or yourspouse might break up with you,
that's idolization, because yourconviction should come from.
I can't do this because I servethe Lord.

(38:56):
God is going to get mad at me.

WALTER (39:02):
You got to rise above that.
You can never put anythingbefore God.
So within your relationshipanother instance of a godly
relationship is God always comefirst.
It's God, then your husband oryour wife, then your children,
then everything else.
Let's dig into that too.
It's your husband and your wife, then your children, not your
children, then your husband andyour wife.

(39:22):
It's your husband and your wife, then your children.
It's God husband, wife,children, everything else.
Men, your ministry starts withyour wife, not with your
ministry, men, because you dothis a lot.
It's not your and maybe somewomen fall into this category.
It's not God.
Your ministry, then your spouseor career or your career is God

(39:46):
husband and wife or spouse,children, then everything else.
If you get out of order, thatwould negatively impact and
throw off the balance witheverything else?

SHANEA (39:59):
Isn't there a scripture for that?

WALTER (40:01):
I'm sure there is, but we would have to find it.

SHANEA (40:03):
I know there's a scripture for that.

WALTER (40:05):
But that was something that God was dealing with me
earlier on that ministry beginsand I think tim ross and someone
else touched on that butministry begins with your, with
your wife or your husband.
It was speaking to men, becausemen struggle with that a lot.
So while you look for that,let's, let's think about this,
and I want you all to readgenesis.

SHANEA (40:24):
It's first, first timothy, three, four, five.
He must manage his own familywell and see that his children
obey him, and he must do so in amanner worthy of full respect.
If anyone does not know how tomanage his own family, how can
he take care of God's church?

WALTER (40:39):
There you go.
I didn't even know that ascripture was the case.

SHANEA (40:43):
I just literally.
I knew it was a scripture, Ijust didn't know which scripture
it was.
I knew it was a scripture, Ijust didn't know which scripture
it was.

WALTER (40:47):
I was having a conversation with God and God
was dealing with me on thestructure of family and he was
telling me that your wife isyour ministry.
He would always tell me withyou.
He would always say that myministry begins with you.

SHANEA (40:59):
Yeah, and that's crazy because I talked about this in
the last episode about how, whenyou go through your conversion
and you give your life over toGod, he will start revealing
stuff to you and the spirit ofGod will move in you in a way,
in your heart, that you willstart to move in a way that you
don't even have to read theBible to know you, should you

(41:19):
should read the Bible.

WALTER (41:21):
You got to be careful.
She's telling us not to readthe Bible.

SHANEA (41:23):
No, I'm not saying that.

WALTER (41:24):
She's saying the scripture will become written on
your heart yes, no, I'm notsaying that she's saying the
scripture will become written onyour heart.
Yes, the law will becomewritten on your heart yeah.
So there's things that Godbegins to reveal to you that is
scripturally based and I'vedealt with this personally where
God has showcased or give mesomething, and then I find it in
scripture later.
That's what she's saying.

SHANEA (41:39):
Yeah.

WALTER (41:39):
So people don't come and start trying to say you know?
You say we do believe inscripture, scripture, we do
believe you should read it.
So, but yeah, god would alwaystell me that ministry begins
with my.
You're my ministry, my ministrystarted with you, then
everything else, and so that'sreally good.
But Genesis 2 and 18, adam wascontent in his relationship with

(42:00):
God.
His purpose and contentmentcame from God, not from his need
, or not his need, for a partner.
Right, let me say this again,this is both for women and men.
Please hear me when I say thisAdam was content in his
relationship with God, hispurpose and contentment.

(42:21):
It came from God, not his needfor a partner.
Mm-hmm.
You should not be seeking outyour purpose within a partner,
or seeking out a person to makeyou content, or seeking out a
person to make you whole.

SHANEA (42:37):
Right, or seeking out a partner to fulfill your own
purpose.

WALTER (42:41):
Because this is the key that we said.

SHANEA (42:43):
Or what thought of lifestyle that you have you need
this particular type of person.
It's like no, I can't date youbecause you don't fit the
lifestyle that you have.
You need this particular typeof person.
It's like, no, I can't date youbecause you don't fit the
lifestyle that I require or youdon't fit the future plans I
have for myself.

WALTER (42:57):
Well, see, I will say this right, and I will caution
and say this this is Genesis twoand 18.
And this is scripture.
The Bible says that.
Then the Lord, God, said itdidn't say.
Adam said it said.
Then the lord god said it isnot good for the man to be alone
.
I will make a helper who isjust right for him.
Adam wasn't looking for anybody.

(43:20):
Adam was content in being withgod.
He didn't even know he wasalone yeah he didn't even know
he was lonely.
So I would say this is the mark.
This is where we want to striveto be.
To where you don't even realizeyou're so caught up in the
things of God.
To where it's like yo, I'mchilling in my season of being
by myself.

(43:40):
To where I'm just doing thewill of God, I'm having a
relationship with God, I'mgetting to know God, I'm
becoming naked and unashamed andGod comes and says you know
what it ain't good for you to bealone.
I got some stuff that I needyou to do that's tied to you
being with someone else, andthere's something that I need
them to do that's tied to you.

SHANEA (43:58):
Yeah, but and I'm glad you brought that up, because I
Genesis 2.25, now, the man andhis wife were both naked and
they felt no shame.
So before you become a believer, before you give your life to
Christ, you have shame, you havedisgrace, you have all these

(44:23):
impurities that you have tocleanse yourself of before you
can be brought to glory, beforeyou can be brought to God's best
for you.
And that is your wildernessseason.
That is your single season.
Your single season should be aseason of wilderness.
It should be a season ofrefinement, a season that God

(44:48):
will humble you and remove allyour shame.
And I put a couple ofscriptures here so that you can
go back and read.
But I think Isaiah 61, 7 talksabout how, if you're shameful,
god will.
What did he say?

(45:08):
I gotta go back and read it.

WALTER (45:13):
Isaiah what.

SHANEA (45:13):
Isaiah 61.7.

WALTER (45:17):
You can get to it real quick.

SHANEA (45:19):
No, I can't actually Isaiah 61.7.
Oh, I got it.
Actually Isaiah 61.7,.
It says instead of your shameyou will receive a double
portion, and instead of disgraceyou will rejoice in your
inheritance.
And so you will inherit adouble portion in your land and
everlasting joy will be yours,everlasting joy.

(45:39):
Everlasting joy after yourwilderness season.

WALTER (45:45):
Wilderness season is no joke.

SHANEA (45:47):
It's not easy.
I I mean, we saw the childrenof israel they struggled, they
struggled some time for 40 years, yeah, but god fed them with
manna.
He had a whole.
He was preparing them for aland of milk and honey he kept
going so in your wildernessseason, in your singleness
season, you have to go throughrefining so that you can get to

(46:08):
the the land of milk and honey.
Your spouse, your partner, yourpurpose, god's purpose for you.
Jesus went into the wildernessseason.

WALTER (46:18):
He came out with the power of the holy spirit, and
this is not to say thewilderness season is going to be
easy because you're in thewilderness jesus literally was
fastened for 40 days and 49tempted by the devil multiple
times yeah, and he was led intothe wilderness body by the holy
spirit but he came out with him,he came out with power and that
power times we we touched onthat in a different episode and

(46:42):
this may be a two-part episode.
Okay, this might be a two partepisode.

SHANEA (46:45):
Okay.

WALTER (46:46):
This might be a two part episode, because we are only on
section three.

SHANEA (46:50):
Oh, okay, well.

WALTER (46:53):
Literally.

SHANEA (46:54):
I guess then we can we can, we can stop there.

WALTER (46:58):
No, we can keep going a little bit.
I just want to say this mightbe a two part episode.

SHANEA (47:02):
Yeah, because I mean we have the role of a husband and
wife and us.

WALTER (47:07):
We got the role of the husband and wife, and that's we
got the role of the wife, we gotthe favor and blessing, we got
the role of both party partiesyeah this is going to be a two.
Uh, so what we'll do?
We're going to touch on therole of the husband and then
next week, we'll start off withthe role of the wife.
Okay, and it was coming to me,this was probably going to be a

(47:27):
two-part episode because there'sso much that we're digging into
.
Okay, so let's do this.

SHANEA (47:34):
Okay.

WALTER (47:35):
And we may touch on this again the role of the husband
Ephesians 5, 25 through 33.
Let's see Ephesians 5, 25through 33.
Let's see Ephesians and I'mpulling it up as we speak, and

(48:00):
let's start here.
And we know this scripture,this is a famous scripture, this
is the NLT.
It says for husbands, thismeans love your wives just as
Christ loved the church.
It says he gave up his life forher to make her holy and clean,
washed by the cleansing of God'sword.
He did this to present her tohimself as a glorious church

(48:23):
without a spot or wrinkle or anyother blemish.
Instead, she will be holy andwithout fault.
In the same way, husbands oughtto love their wives as they
love their own bodies, for a manwho loves his wife actually
shows love for himself.
No one hates his own body butfeeds and cares for it, just as

(48:44):
Christ cares for the church andwe are members of his body.
As the scripture says, a manleaves his father and mother and
is joined to his wife, and thetwo are united into one.
This is the great mystery, butit is an illustration of the way
Christ and the church are one.
So again I say, each man mustlove his wife as he loves

(49:04):
himself, and the wife mustrespect her husband.
That's a lot to unpack.
So, as husbands, we're calledto have a sacrificial love
towards our wives.
I said this earlier on, and Ithink I've said this quite a few

(49:25):
times Men, we show up to ourmarriage to die to self.
We become the example, which iswhy it's impossible for us to do
this outside of the power ofthe Holy Spirit, Because we are
inherently selfish individuals.
So it is challenging for us tolove our wives the way God

(49:47):
intended for us to love ourwives outside of the Holy Spirit
, and it's been designed and setup in such a way to where we
have no other option but to relyon the Holy Spirit.
If we do not, we will fail inbeing what it is that God has
called us to be to our wives.
So what it means to love yourwife as Christ loves the church,

(50:10):
it is literally a selfless love, it is a sacrificial love and
it ties into our leadership.

(50:31):
But let's say one more timeit's dying to self and we have
to get this because there's amisconception we have about
leadership Husbands must serve,not control or dominate their

(50:59):
wives.
Husbands must serve, notcontrol or dominate their wives.
True leadership in marriage isrooted in humility and service.
You're not a dictator Right.
Many men think they are leadersin their marriage, and this is
something that God gave to meand it messed me up.
Many men and we talked aboutthis many men think they are
leaders in their marriage andrelationships when, in all

(51:28):
actuality, they're nothing morethan dictators.
Leaders look to serve others,while dictators look to be
served by others.

SHANEA (51:37):
What's your thoughts on that, babe?
I was just about to look at thedefinition of a leader.

WALTER (51:42):
Honestly some of the greatest.
Some of the greatest leadersare some of the greatest
servants.
They're some of the greatestservants.
They serve well.
Some of the greatest leadersare some of the greatest
servants and while my wife islooking up that, this was
something that God put in mymind today.
There are men out here.

(52:03):
They don't desire a wife, theydesire a puppet.
There's men out there thatdon't desire a wife, they desire
a puppet.
They want to be a puppet master.
They desire a woman that'sgoing to do whatever they say do

(52:24):
, however, they say, do it.
That's not what it means forthe wife to serve their husband.
Sorry, sorry, I'm so sorry, I'mso sorry, I'm so sorry.
And men, how are you going tolead your wife when you're not

(52:45):
even submitted to Christ?
How can we lead our wives whenwe haven't even submitted
ourselves to the authority ofChrist?
How can we lead our wives whenwe don't know how to serve?
One of the last things Jesusdid with his disciples is what
he washed their feet.
He washed their feet.

(53:07):
He did.
Go ahead, baby.
I know you want to saysomething.

SHANEA (53:13):
Oh no, I was just looking at.
I didn't like the definitionthat they gave me for leader
Because it said commanding.

WALTER (53:21):
You find a definition of what a leader is in Christ.

SHANEA (53:24):
No, you do, and I found a definition on.

WALTER (53:30):
We have to look at the biblical definition.

SHANEA (53:33):
In biblical context, a leader is someone who is
divinely appointed or recognizedby the community to guide,
direct and govern according toGod's will.
Leadership in the Bible ischaracterized by service,
humility, wisdom and obedienceto God.

WALTER (53:47):
Say that one more time.

SHANEA (53:49):
Humility.
Wisdom Start from the beginning?

WALTER (53:51):
What is it?
Leadership is by what?

SHANEA (53:54):
Leadership in the Bible is characterized by service,
humility, wisdom and obedienceto God.
Leaders are often called toshepherd God's people, ensuring
their spiritual and physicalwell-being.
So, servanthood you're calledto serve others, Putting the

(54:16):
needs of the community aboveyour own.
Doing what Putting the needs ofthe community above your own.
Doing what putting the needs ofthe community above your own,
like jesus washing the disciplesfeet, is a profound example of
this principle oh, okay humility, humbling yourself before the
lord so that he can exalt you.

WALTER (54:39):
So, as leaders in marriage, we're called to serve.
Serve our wives, serve ourchildren.
Here's the thing.
The Bible calls men to lead inlove, not by asserting authority
, but by serving humbly.
A husband's leadership shouldbe rooted in sacrifice and

(55:04):
service, just as Christ servedthe church and continues to
serve the church.
We have been called to serve ourwives.
There is nothing greater thanseeing a man that serves his
wife, than seeing a man thatserves his family, than seeing a

(55:26):
man that continued to lay downhis flesh, than seeing a man
that continued to pick up hiscross and follow Christ.
And as you follow Christ, youcan lead wife by, by way of
example, straight to christ andshe will be what, babe, she will

(55:48):
bring you what you're talkingabout favor, yeah, favor from
god because this is the pointthat and we touched, touched on
this Joshua 24 and 15.
You want to read that, babe?

SHANEA (56:05):
Joshua 24 and 15?
Mm-hmm, okay, let me pull thatup.
If you already have it, youshould go ahead and read it.
I don't have it Okay, oh Joshua, what?

WALTER (56:21):
24 and 15.

SHANEA (56:23):
24 and 15.
Mm-hmm.
Says but if you refuse to servethe Lord, then choose today
whom you will serve.
Mm-hmm.
Would you prefer the gods ofyour ancestors served beyond the
Euphrates, or will it be thegods of the Amorites in whose
land you now live?

(56:43):
I think it's Euphrates, mm-hmm.

WALTER (56:51):
Men must decide to serve God first and then serve their
wives.
Mm-hmm.
Leadership in marriage involveschoosing daily to follow
Christ's example of humility andsacrificial love 1 Corinthians
13.

SHANEA (57:11):
Your ministry starts at home and that's why you have so
many people at the church notbeing served, not getting what
they need.

WALTER (57:19):
You have leaders, pastors that don't know how to
serve their wives.

SHANEA (57:23):
You have pastors that's not submitted to God, and so
they're not humble, knowing thattheir dependence comes from the
Lord Should be on the Lord.

WALTER (57:34):
And the thing about is this right here, truth be told
women about?
Is this right here, truth betold women?
Only a man who is submitted tochrist can truly love and lead
his wife as christ intended.
If that man is not submitted tochrist, he can't love you and
he can't lead you how god isintended for you to be loved and

(57:56):
led.
It's only through thatsubmission that you learn how to
do that.
It's only through thatrelationship with Christ that
you begin to take upon theidentity of Christ within your
marriage.

SHANEA (58:08):
And you can't make that man do that.

WALTER (58:14):
And you can't pray that man into that outside of God.
A lot of women think that youcan pray that man into a change.

SHANEA (58:21):
Well, that's because they tell you that.
But first of all, you shouldn'tbe with anybody that God didn't
tell you to be with in thefirst place.

WALTER (58:27):
No, and sometimes and we talked about this before you
could be in the place that Godhas told you to be in their own
time.

SHANEA (58:34):
But they'll use the scripture that Paul.
But Paul said it was himspeaking and not god.

WALTER (58:41):
Paul said that you can be with an unbeliever.
Paul also told you that it wasbest for us not to be with
anybody, but they don't thinkabout that scripture, huh they
don't never bring that scripture, they don't bring the scripture
up in the same chapter in thesame passage first corinthians 7
, when paul stated it was bestfor us to be alone so nothing
was standing in the way of whatGod has called us to.
Yes, genesis 2 tells us whatGod's desire was for marriage,

(59:04):
why he created in the firstplace.
He said be fruitful andmultiply.
That was something that Paulwas called to A life of
singleness.

SHANEA (59:14):
But they also don't talk about the part after where it
says you can be with anunbelieving spouse.

WALTER (59:20):
He says that they could leave and you will, and god will
give you peace but the thing is, all of these things was based
on the fact that they keptbugging paul.

SHANEA (59:28):
Yes, the church of current kept bugging because
they were moving outside of thewill of god.
Outside the will of god.

WALTER (59:33):
They didn't want to do god's will paul was trying to
set parameters to keep themlet's just keep it to keep them,
to keep them from sinning.
Exactly.
Let's call it what it is Now.
We could keep going, but Ithink we will note here where
we're stopping.
We're going to stop right there.

SHANEA (59:55):
Okay.

WALTER (59:58):
There's a few things that we're going to get into
next week's episode.
That is how We'll say this,I'll say this and we'll leave it
here.
We can keep going.
Let me get a few points in.
So this A husband must become aservant to his wife, modeling

(01:00:21):
Christ's humility.
So a husband must become andJohn Bevere said this and it was
so true.
He said that as men, we are tobecome master servants.
You're going to be like he'stalking about serving a lot.
As men, we are to become masterservants to our wives.
We teach them how to serve.

(01:00:44):
We teach them how to serve asChrist teaches us how to serve.

SHANEA (01:00:49):
Because you are the example.
Jesus is the example, yourhusband is the example.
Once he's the example.
Men, if your wife isn't doingwhat you need her to do, maybe
you aren't doing what you'resupposed to do.
You have to lead by example.

WALTER (01:01:05):
And you got to take that back to God and y'all not going
to like that, but that's thereality of what it is.
It's true we got way too manywomen leading in relationships
spiritually, which is why yourrelationships are failing, even
in the context of you possiblybeing what God has called you to
be.
Your relationship is failingbecause the wrong person is
leading, the wrong person ispraying more.

(01:01:27):
The wrong person is in theirword more than anybody else.
God gave the command to Adam.
Then he gave the.
Adam gave the command to Eve.
God didn't give the command toEve.
God didn't create Eve first.
So as men, we got to takeaccountability for our own
actions.
I'm sorry, stop looking at yourwife to lead you spiritually.

(01:01:48):
How are you calling yourself aman but you're spiritually weak.
I don't care how much you benchpress, I don't care how much
money you make, spiritually youare weak, you carry no weight in
the spirit.
But you call yourself a man how, please explain that?

(01:02:10):
But you can't pray your wifethrough nothing.
You can't come up againstdemons.
You don't know your authorityin the spirit, like low level.
How are you calling, I'm sorry,men?
Oh, they're not going to likethis.
How are you called to be aspiritual leader, but you're

(01:02:36):
still struggling with lust.
You're still struggling withlust.
You're still struggling withperversion.
You're still struggling withself-control.
How are you leading the family?

(01:02:57):
That's all it takes for theenemy to get you.
Sir, you need to go back tohaving a relationship with God.
You need to go back to thedrawing board and die to self
before you talk about trying tolead a woman.
Don't worry, my wife will geton women next week.

(01:03:18):
But we talking about you.
Right, lead a woman, don't worry, my wife will get on women next
week, but we talking about youright now, man.
But you got a million thingsthat you telling me that this
woman need to do and God hascalled you to do.
You, men, and we got to getready to stop.
Stop weaponizing the word.
Stop utilizing the word to tryto get that woman to do what you
want her to do.
Stop utilizing the word to tryto get that woman to do what you
want her to do.
Stop utilizing the word to tryto convict her.

(01:03:41):
That's not what it's there for,because if you're dealing, if
you have a relationship with Godand I can tell you from
experience God's speaking to youfirst about the stuff you're
doing wrong Just saying.
Just saying where are we at?

(01:04:04):
Where are we at?
Oh, let's do this and we doneokay.
Malachi 2, 14 through 15.
Because there's men out herewho want to have multiple wives,
hold on, okay, malachi 2, 14through 15.
Because there's men out herewho want to have multiple wives,
hold on.

(01:04:25):
There's men out here who wantto be married and also actually
have something on the side.

SHANEA (01:04:29):
Or not.
I mean, let's be for real whenyou have sex, you are married.

WALTER (01:04:34):
Yep, which is why you shouldn't be having sex.

SHANEA (01:04:38):
You tied to somebody in this video.
You got to break all that stuffoff.
That's another subject.

WALTER (01:04:41):
So the beginning of verse 14, it says this Malachi 2
, this NLT.
It says you cry out why doesn'tthe Lord accept my worship?
I'll tell you why.
Because the Lord witnessed thevows you made, the vows you and
your wife made when you wereyoung, but you have been

(01:05:02):
unfaithful to her, though sheremained your faithful partner,
the wife of your marriage vows.
Didn't the Lord make you onewith your wife?
So, people, when it says didn'tthe Lord make you one with your
wife, this doesn't mean thatyou married somebody you wanted
to marry and it wasn't submittedto God.
When this is touching on it,it's touching on the concept of
you submitting your marriage toGod, meaning that God brought

(01:05:23):
you all together.
But let's continue.
In body and spirit, you are his.
And what does he want?
Godly children.
This is what I was looking for,yes.
What does he want?
Godly children from your union?
Yes.
So guard your heart, remainloyal to the wife of your youth,
for I hate divorce, says theLord, the God of Israel.
To divorce your wife is tooverwhelm her with cruelty, says

(01:05:46):
the Lord of Heaven's armies.
So guard your hearts, do not beunfaithful to your wife.
People, what the Bible wassaying is that there were those
out there who were givenofferings.
They were worshiping God, butthey didn't do right by their
wife, so God wasn't hearing it.

(01:06:13):
The Bible says that a man thatfinds a wife and this is NLT
finds a treasure and obtainfavor from the Lord.
The reason that a lot of thesemen out here don't have favor
first of all, you haven't yourwife.
That's first, and then, secondof all, when you do find your
wife, you mistreat her yeah sothat negatively impacts the
favor, because you'remistreating that treasure that
god has given you yes so how ahusband's relationship with his

(01:06:38):
wife and we're talking aboutthis, it says, your relationship
with your wife and how youtreat your wife will negatively
impact your prayers and worshipbefore God, yes, and whether
it's something that isrecognized by God.

SHANEA (01:06:56):
This is in the Bible, this is scripture.

WALTER (01:07:01):
So the way that you treat your wife directly impacts
your spiritual life negativelyor positively, and I think
that's a good place to stop forthis week.
They're not going to like that.
But to God be the glory.

SHANEA (01:07:19):
To God be the glory, anything you want to add babe,
Because I know we got on a manand they're going to feel that,
but to god be the glory.

WALTER (01:07:21):
God be the glory.
Anything you want to add, babe,because I know we got on the
men and they're gonna feel sometype of way.
Don't worry, we will deal withthe women next week, but it
starts with men and, um, ladies,if you got to send this to
someone, send it to them pleasesend it, hopefully, but also let
this be known that the thingsthat I've touched on, uh, ladies
, this is what you have to thinkabout when you're looking into
marriage.

(01:07:42):
When you have a man coming toyou and saying, oh, god has
called me to be with you and Iam a man of God and I am a man
of integrity, you have to takeall of this and you have to line
this up and say does this touch, does this line up with the
word, does this line up withwhat God has called for
everything to be?

SHANEA (01:08:03):
But you have to know the word.
This is a lineup with what?

WALTER (01:08:03):
God has called for everything to be, but you have
to know the word so that peoplecan't use it against you, yep.

SHANEA (01:08:06):
So that takes time.
All of that takes time.

WALTER (01:08:10):
So we will, because we could keep going but this would
end up being like almost a hourand a half to two hour episodes.
We're not going to do that.
So we will pick up on the roleof a wife next week.
Also, we're going to touch onfavor and blessings in a godly
relationship.
We're going to touch on therole of both parties in a
healthy, godly relationship nextweek and go from there.

(01:08:32):
We may touch on some otherstuff next week as well, but
anything you want to add, babe.

SHANEA (01:08:38):
No, we, uh, but anything you want to add, babe.
No, um, we hope you guysenjoyed this episode and, um, if
it has blessed you, pleasebless others with it that you
think that they should hear.
Ask god to give you ears tohear and eyes to see what it is
that he is saying and if youfeel any type of conviction in
this video.

WALTER (01:08:59):
Don't get up in the comment section fussing and
crying and all that stuff.
Please stop, please.

SHANEA (01:09:05):
We're not going to stop what we're doing.

WALTER (01:09:08):
Please take it to God in prayer.
We're not going to stop whatwe're doing.

SHANEA (01:09:09):
Please take it to God in prayer.

WALTER (01:09:10):
And it's out of love, it's really out of love.

SHANEA (01:09:13):
Because we've been there .
We have been there and it waschallenging.
God has corrected us and wewant to extend grace to you so
that you don't have to gothrough the things that we went
through, exactly exactly becauseit is real so we appreciate you
all this week.

WALTER (01:09:30):
Um, like my wife said, if you like it, definitely
comment.
Uh, definitely subscribe andshare, share your testimony,
share how this has been ablessing to you.
We're being obedient to God andputting this out there for you.
Yes.
And so we pray that thiscontinues to be a blessing to
you.
And we appreciate you all andwe do read through the comments
and see, we read through yourtestimonies.

(01:09:52):
We try to address any questionsor concerns as much as possible
.
So, yeah, we definitelyappreciate you all and we
appreciate the community thatGod is allowing us to build
through this.
So I think that's everythinguntil next week.
We'll explore part two of this.
You all be blessed.
Bye, all right, bye.