Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:01):
There's one picture with no context and two comedians with
no clue. This is picture that's gus. In this episode
from Fire and Ash, a man comes running towards us
wearing nothing but a borat man Keenie great success. Andrew
Hansen and Brett Blake need to figure out what's going on.
Speaker 2 (00:22):
Don't race off.
Speaker 1 (00:24):
The truth will be revealed at the end of the episode.
Speaker 3 (00:27):
Now here's your host, Merrick.
Speaker 4 (00:29):
What's hello, and thanks for joining us as we discuss
these very important pictures. You can play along by checking
out the picture in the description. I'm here with Andrew
Hanson and Britt Blake. Britt, can you describe what we're
looking at here? I mean, obviously it's a man on fire.
Speaker 5 (00:46):
It's a man on fire wearing a man keny. It
looks like a tour defridge gone horribly fucking wrong, you.
Speaker 6 (00:54):
Know what I mean.
Speaker 5 (00:55):
It's like a rich kid's Tour de Fridge and someone
bought a gin distill with them and it somehow exploded
halfway through the Tour de Fridge and everyone's fucking dead.
Speaker 3 (01:05):
Besides this guy.
Speaker 7 (01:06):
He's emerging from the flames and he looks as though
he's got a determination that can only say competition.
Speaker 2 (01:13):
Yeah, competition, you reckon, he's in a competition. Is that
what you're telling me?
Speaker 7 (01:17):
Mary Well, i'd imagine because he looks a like he's running.
Speaker 2 (01:21):
Yeah, he's got a team number on his head.
Speaker 7 (01:23):
Well that's an interesting point, isn't it, Because you'd normally sit, like,
you know, when you see a triathlon or something like that,
they'll have their number, but they normally write it on
their arm. But they've written it on his forehead, which
makes me think that everybody else around him knows that
he's a fox Stick.
Speaker 5 (01:36):
Well, yeah, the man keen, he gives that away.
Speaker 3 (01:39):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (01:40):
Maybe he's got no choice though, I mean that could
be the team uniform. That's true. They've got to wear
whatever sponsor gets put on. For example, maybe if the uniform,
if that's it.
Speaker 5 (01:50):
I love the choice of Like, he's running in a mankini,
but he's like, fuck, I don't want my hands to
get cold.
Speaker 3 (01:55):
I better wear glass.
Speaker 2 (01:56):
I know he's rucked up. He's rugged up, isn't he.
And he's he's got those boots are warm too. It's
a winter scene.
Speaker 7 (02:03):
Yeah, I don't understand it's like the world's hardest triathlon
because I mean maybe they're cycling gloves.
Speaker 6 (02:09):
You know, been for a swim.
Speaker 7 (02:10):
He's got on the bike and now the last part
is running through hades and that's why he's on fire.
Speaker 6 (02:16):
It's tough.
Speaker 3 (02:16):
Might have finally gone too far, you know what I mean?
Speaker 5 (02:19):
Now we're actually fucking setting the course on fire. This
time it is wild.
Speaker 2 (02:26):
It's acts with the gloves though, like the fingers, they're
missing their fingerless gloves. I feel like perhaps this gentleman
started out wearing a lot more before the explosion. Okay,
I think he might have been wearing you know, three
piece suit, a top, hat and tails or something. And
then the explosion, the explosion happened, and unbeknownst to this
(02:48):
poor man, his after work mankini has been revealed for
all this because the rest of the clothes are burnt
off along with the fingers of the gloves. You see,
Well it's not.
Speaker 5 (02:57):
His Also, great campaign for the shoe coming because they've
survived that explosion. So what brand is that? I want
to get on assets? You don't want to get on board,
fire profess, Fire professor. I'm envious of their mankini because
I got given one once and was forced to wear
one at a party and let's just say the beans
escaped the bag all the time.
Speaker 3 (03:17):
You know what I mean?
Speaker 2 (03:18):
What happens?
Speaker 3 (03:19):
Yes, because I had the cheap one from online. It
just doesn't. It doesn't. And not that I'm a well
endowed man. I'm not hit to brand.
Speaker 5 (03:26):
If anything below average, some would say, particularly my girlfriend.
But it never, it never cradled, I never felt support.
Speaker 2 (03:33):
This is a lesson to you. Don't don't buy them online,
but you're supposed to get them fitted but by a professional,
like a like a woman who buys a good quality Brasier.
You need to go to the Mankini shop right and
have a where were you ten years ago?
Speaker 5 (03:48):
You know?
Speaker 3 (03:48):
Go to the shop. They measure your gooch, you.
Speaker 6 (03:50):
Know what I mean.
Speaker 3 (03:50):
I don't mind that.
Speaker 2 (03:51):
Yeah.
Speaker 7 (03:54):
Also like the fact that you bought one online, you
bought the cheapest one, like I mean, why would you skip?
Speaker 6 (03:59):
How would you skip?
Speaker 5 (03:59):
On?
Speaker 3 (04:00):
Mate? Border? And then you've got to wear this? And
then I had I had a few vodka cruises, you
know what I mean.
Speaker 7 (04:09):
My mate hated board it, so you've got to he's a.
Speaker 5 (04:12):
Big man from New Zealand. In fact, it wasn't a part.
It was just me and his laundroom, and you couldn't
say no. You can't say he's like, oh yeah, he
put on my carries like do a sexy dance for
me baking?
Speaker 3 (04:23):
And who am I to say? No?
Speaker 6 (04:25):
No, you can't say.
Speaker 2 (04:26):
Wondering what the price points of a man keeni? Yeah,
I mean when you say the cheapest one is there
like a is there a Ralph Lauren mankini that you
could buy if you want to.
Speaker 5 (04:36):
I'm sure that you could get like a spelt or
like maybe and what's what's a night like silk you
don't want? And then the other end that have like
a pletha you don't want that.
Speaker 6 (04:50):
That's cheap than what could wear.
Speaker 7 (04:53):
Let's uh, let's draw attention to just behind our running
man here, there's another contestan there and he's wearing a
number on his chest to be is two to zero five.
So now we're getting the sense this is definitely this
is a competition. Now, this is not a challenge. This
is not like one individual person saying I'm going to
go and be a lunatic. This is a bunch of
(05:14):
lunatics participating in something.
Speaker 5 (05:16):
And I can ask this may be a fuck question.
Is this a photo from the Boston bombing.
Speaker 2 (05:22):
That's a fucked question.
Speaker 7 (05:26):
That's why would I pick a photo from the fucking
Look at the photo, mate, there's an explosion, there's a bridge,
the guy's wearing green.
Speaker 3 (05:34):
That's fucking Boston. It's a marathon.
Speaker 2 (05:37):
It's a marathon.
Speaker 6 (05:38):
Imagine how it would be going talking to the same guys.
Speaker 7 (05:41):
I reckon, we should get a photo from a from
a brutal terrorist act and we'll get Brett Blake in
and he'll find outay to make it funny. You.
Speaker 3 (05:48):
I don't know what your thought process. I just thought
so it's.
Speaker 6 (05:52):
Not my thought process. No, it's not from the Boston
bomb What is it.
Speaker 2 (05:55):
From nine to eleven? Mary, because that's what we're seeing.
But there are a lot of mankini wearers in the
I don't know, it's a competition, we would hope. Okay,
what's the competition?
Speaker 6 (06:05):
Andrew? What is it? What are they competing for? Or
ask well, first of all, where are they look?
Speaker 2 (06:09):
I think they're clearly in a place with a very
open dress code.
Speaker 6 (06:13):
I mean, you know it can't be a dictatorship.
Speaker 2 (06:16):
Yeah, it's not somewhere where you've got a dress from
head to tone. Something conservative so I'd say, you know,
a progressive Western democracy. Mind you the guy in the background,
Mary because not wearing the mankini. It's somewhere where such
contests are all out Eastern Europe. I'm going to go
Eastern Europe, so it's not total dictatorship. And it's also
a place.
Speaker 3 (06:34):
Are you going Kazakhstan? Because that's.
Speaker 2 (06:38):
I'm thinking more just where where would you be allowed
to set fire to a whole sports ground.
Speaker 6 (06:43):
And then send a man?
Speaker 5 (06:44):
Where could you? You don't need insurance for this shit either.
They're on New Zealand because they do stuff like that there.
Speaker 7 (06:51):
It does feel like it could be school is week
in Russia, doesn't it.
Speaker 2 (06:55):
Maybe he's a school Maybe he's just finished it.
Speaker 6 (06:57):
Well, he's finished it as well. He's had a lot
of vodka, he's had a few, he's been with Britt Blake.
Speaker 7 (07:00):
Britt Blake organized him to get his mankini has gone,
let's go.
Speaker 5 (07:05):
That's not school is That's just one of Russian's normal classes.
Speaker 2 (07:09):
That's probably the prime.
Speaker 5 (07:11):
Yeah, yeah, you agree, Yes, this guy in the man Kenny,
but he will be president one day.
Speaker 7 (07:19):
Let's let's zone in right on his face there, what's
that face? So to me, is that a face of regret?
Is that is that is he having that epoch moment
where he's just gone, this was.
Speaker 6 (07:29):
A bad, bad choice.
Speaker 5 (07:32):
I feel like he's at the stage where he's about
I don't know if anyone's done long distance running before,
but you're at the five k mark and you're really
regretting your war wardrobe decision. You're like, I should have
put fucking vacilline in my ass, you know what I mean,
Like the chafe is right. Yeah, look, everyone can see
my sexy little peach right now and it's funny. Haha, yeah,
the boys, But fuck, this is hurting my buttthole.
Speaker 3 (07:54):
Yeah, yeah, that's what I feel.
Speaker 2 (07:56):
I feel, I feel I'm with you there. But he's
on the edge of tears. Look at the face he's
a about to hear in marathons, you know, people just
they just go to the toilet while they run. I've
heard true. And this gentleman can't do that because look
at him, he's everyone know there's nothing to catch it.
Speaker 5 (08:10):
But if he does go, it's just burnt straight away,
So no one really knows.
Speaker 7 (08:14):
When you say they're flaming turds in the background, that's
what he's leaving behind him.
Speaker 2 (08:20):
Betrayal of flaming turds, That's what's what we're looking at.
Speaker 5 (08:24):
He's had an extra hot Zinger box from AFC and
he's just fucking offloading.
Speaker 2 (08:28):
No wonder the gentleman behind him looking for turns. Look,
he's looking down thinking, how am I going to get
over these flaming shits? I can't, I can't pick my
way through this?
Speaker 6 (08:37):
All right? Would you like to know what the true
story is behind this one? Fuck?
Speaker 1 (08:40):
Yeah, that's an interesting theory.
Speaker 2 (08:44):
Is correct? Probably not, but let's find out.
Speaker 7 (08:52):
This is a picture from The Tough Guy Challenged two
thousand and nine for Hampton, England.
Speaker 2 (08:59):
Na Her Majesty's England.
Speaker 6 (09:02):
Yes, her former her majesty.
Speaker 2 (09:07):
Pardon me, yeah, but yes. This might be why she
passed away. Maybe she was was she there watching?
Speaker 5 (09:13):
She was their cremation? This was the broadcast part Yeah, yeah,
just a guy and a g banger, running over, running
over ashes, grieving, grieving.
Speaker 3 (09:23):
Sorry, my bad, wrong word.
Speaker 6 (09:24):
This is a charity challenge.
Speaker 7 (09:26):
Thousands partake in the run and it's a grueling set
of obstacles and obviously one of the obstacles is your
attire and that's the first obstacle is maybe getting a
pair of shorts. He found that first challenge, but been
on with the rest of them anyway.
Speaker 2 (09:42):
And imagine it was a cult you were on the
money instead of being cold. It's in England.
Speaker 6 (09:47):
Yeah, and you're also too You said it was like
a tough muter thing.
Speaker 2 (09:50):
It is.
Speaker 6 (09:50):
It's a tough guy challenge two thousand and nine.
Speaker 5 (09:52):
They've always got to fuck out do each other. You know,
they've got the neon run, they've got the tought. It's
just it never when does it end? When does it end?
Speaker 7 (10:00):
Is there is there a competition we could see where
all contestants have to wear a mankini and it can
just be the set of challenges, could be just using
public transport, arriving at work, going to the movie.
Speaker 5 (10:12):
That would be the toughest part is if you did
it in that way. But the toughest part is you
know how to actually let people know you're in a competition.
That's a credit and that's how you win is by
like year three, you're like, guys, I was in the competition.
I'm one of the last person standing. I've been on
this training for two years. I'm a sex best, it's.
Speaker 8 (10:27):
Good, last man not arrested exactly aloud to do it now,
that's the real time it's good or just a job
interview show where you've got to try and get a
job while dressed as that man and see if you can.
Speaker 6 (10:38):
Well, if you want a job in commercial radio, that's
how you go about.
Speaker 3 (10:41):
That's you say that, don't consider you otherwise.
Speaker 6 (10:45):
This is the benchmark. This is the entrade.
Speaker 3 (10:48):
What's the secret sound my cheeks rubbing together.
Speaker 2 (10:50):
On a yes, I'm pretty sure I've seen Christian O'Connell
turn up to work like this.
Speaker 7 (10:56):
If you want to see the picture we've been talking about,
we've got a link in the show not to go
and have a look at a picture.
Speaker 6 (11:01):
Discuss is an iHeart production. Thank you Brett and Andrew.
Speaker 3 (11:04):
Next to having us mate m