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April 25, 2023 11 mins

Dating Rules: Kissing After The First Date?

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Speaker 1 (00:00):
Robin Terri Little Kid on Brisbane's Kiss ninety seven three.

Speaker 2 (00:09):
Yeah, some mind dating it Sid.

Speaker 3 (00:11):
It's not just for the single ladies to live vicariously
through you.

Speaker 1 (00:14):
This is this segment, Robin. It's for all those that
are happily in a couple and they get to they
get to see, they get to remember how awful and
how nervous, but how exciting it also was.

Speaker 2 (00:26):
It's not exciting. My girlfriend Heidi, who's the counselor that
we often have here on the radio, she keeps saying
to me, it's supposed to be fun, Robin, like, this
is not fun.

Speaker 3 (00:34):
Isn't it a little bit fun? Some of it's fun?

Speaker 1 (00:36):
What about when you get like, because you're online dating,
so what about when you get the little match and
you get a little.

Speaker 2 (00:41):
Like someone likes you, or if they send you a
rose that's cool, super that super likes. But if you
don't like them, that's talks, because then you don't know
whether you should reply or not.

Speaker 1 (00:49):
Anyway, what do you do, By the way, if you
get to say you get a super rose, which is
that's that means someone really likes you.

Speaker 3 (00:55):
So yeah, so you get.

Speaker 2 (00:56):
That you pretending like you don't.

Speaker 3 (00:59):
Honestly don't.

Speaker 1 (01:00):
I've not heard of the rows only on The Bachelor,
So you get that. Yeah, do you feel like you
need to respond?

Speaker 3 (01:06):
Do you respond?

Speaker 1 (01:07):
No?

Speaker 2 (01:07):
If I don't, If if there's no interest, don't engage, Okay,
under any circumstances. Where it becomes problematic is if you
start a conversation with someone and I'm very ridiculously monogamous
online dating sounds stupid, but if I like one person,
I'm not going to chat to heaps. Okay, So you
kind of then like to go down a path with
that one person, and I do struggle to like, should

(01:29):
there be a stock standard reply, like thanks so much,
good luck with your journey, but I'm chatting to someone else?

Speaker 3 (01:35):
Yeah, but then you want to.

Speaker 2 (01:36):
Keep your options open in case that guy isn't what
you're thinking. Okay, anyway, so we're up to date too, right.
So I told you on Monday that I went on
date one with this guy and you know, he's I
don't judge people based on what they look like, but
like he's professional and the way he wrote his profile

(01:57):
was really cool. He was really direct and what he
wants it and I find that and a really attractive
and appealing thing. But the first date was to the Whale,
the Brendan Fraser movie, which one an oscar where Brendan
eats himself.

Speaker 1 (02:12):
What do you think.

Speaker 3 (02:17):
Were either of you eating during the film? One of
you just shoveling popcorn?

Speaker 2 (02:23):
And then we had this awkward moment on the curve
because I didn't drive because it was in James Street
and I was worried about parking, and he did so
like I'm not going to walk him to his car
because that's bit orcs. And then he was waiting with
me for an uber and then the ubers kept canceling. Anyway,
it was just left like he seems quite a tactile guy,
and I'm really tactile.

Speaker 3 (02:42):
That's is that what that means?

Speaker 2 (02:44):
But we didn't reach for each other in the film
because that's weird.

Speaker 3 (02:48):
So no touching in the movie. In the darkness of
the sea.

Speaker 2 (02:53):
Would you touch that you wouldn't touch someone?

Speaker 3 (02:55):
Oh yeah, didn't in a movie? Yeah, that's my go to.
You do that like.

Speaker 2 (03:02):
Thing that we did in high school where you your.

Speaker 3 (03:04):
Reach over, reach over and just put a hand on
a hand. Yeah, oh yeah.

Speaker 2 (03:09):
But if you're not sure that there's going to be
a second, third.

Speaker 3 (03:11):
Or fourth date.

Speaker 2 (03:12):
Would you do that?

Speaker 3 (03:13):
It's a look, are you that desperate? It's tense. It's
tense when you're putting the handover. I just got this
could be, this could be. If I don't get some
type of response, this is going to be bad.

Speaker 2 (03:22):
Gently lovely picking your hand up.

Speaker 3 (03:24):
If they put your hand back, that's the worst.

Speaker 2 (03:27):
I did not do that, okay, and so neither did he.

Speaker 3 (03:30):
And he didn't touch.

Speaker 2 (03:31):
So then he goes off on his car and I
get in my yuber and that's it. So I reckon.
The week between after the first date and then the
potential of the second date is possibly the worst week
when it comes to online dating, because you're feeling innately insecure.
Do they like you? Should you like? Do you wait
a couple of days? Like everyone's got a theory of

(03:52):
you know, my girlfriends are going, oh, you know, wait
till he responds to you. I'm like, I'm an adult.
I don't need to play those load of games that
annoy But then I'm thinking, but what if he doesn't
like me? And what if I option the second date
and he says no, And then I'll be really humiliated.
So what I did I left it till like Thursday,

(04:13):
and because he had paid for meal before the film,
I felt that I needed to reciprocate that. So I
set a message saying, you know, you paid for everything,
and you know that's not necessarily in my wheelhouse. Can
I reciprocate and take you to dinner?

Speaker 3 (04:28):
Okay, that's nice.

Speaker 2 (04:29):
He came back really quickly, which is awesome. It's good
because you know, if you'd left me on read for hours, yucky.
So yeah, second date.

Speaker 1 (04:39):
Went to So you've already had it, You had the
second day.

Speaker 2 (04:43):
Had the second day. I'm a little ahead of you. Yes, yes,
on purpose because I know how this ends. Okay. So
I went to Covent Garden in West End, went and
had dinner and it was really good because there's this
very theatrical wayter there who just breaks the ice with
any sort of or quickness. And then we went on
to the tiki bar, yeah, for drinks. So it's a

(05:06):
double date, double date date.

Speaker 3 (05:08):
Things keep going yeah, ok, and then nothing and then nothing.
What do you mean what about any touchy feeling? Was
there any touching?

Speaker 2 (05:16):
Yeah, we're kind of both touching people, so there was
a bit of that, but you know, like in my head,
there's these value systems that you do, right, So I go,
do we have the same values? Yes, we do, so
straight off, I'm okay with that. Are we good communicators?
Yes we are. But then it comes to expectation, and
I'm like, do I expect something now, like after the

(05:36):
second date? I think there is a bit of an expectations.

Speaker 3 (05:39):
Stood around it, an uber the first day, kiss good night?

Speaker 1 (05:43):
I won't kiss on the first date the second d okay,
So what about at the end of this one?

Speaker 3 (05:47):
No kissing?

Speaker 2 (05:51):
Okay, that is the most intimate thing I can give
another person.

Speaker 3 (05:54):
Well, like, what.

Speaker 2 (06:02):
Sleep with this date? I need to be sure. Okay,
you just again, you're going to patch someone on the
on the first or second date? Yes? Are you going
to sleep with them?

Speaker 3 (06:19):
No? Probably not, probably not, let's not.

Speaker 1 (06:24):
Yeah, well that that does affect the situation, that's true.
But yeah, i'd kiss for sure on the second Yeah,
come on, no, But.

Speaker 2 (06:34):
Because I really care, like I want, I'm here for
the long haul. I don't want to just hand it
my kiss is Willie Millis, I'm crap.

Speaker 1 (06:42):
Well, I mean that's why you need to kiss, work
it out, you need you need to run a rule
for it.

Speaker 2 (06:47):
I've got a girlfriend who has to sleep with a
person on the first date because it is so important
to it. If they're done in bed, she won't see
she has.

Speaker 3 (06:54):
To sleep with Yeah, yeah, I've never heard of that.
What's her name?

Speaker 1 (07:00):
Seven twenty four Robin's been on a second date with
mystery man.

Speaker 3 (07:03):
We still don't have a name.

Speaker 1 (07:04):
We can't even we don't even have a nickname for
him yet because we don't know anything about it.

Speaker 3 (07:08):
But we know that he's We know that you haven't
kissed No, did you.

Speaker 2 (07:11):
Kiss Naomi after the first date? You went for a
run together? Yeah, that would have been sweaty and awkward
and you would have hated it. Yes.

Speaker 1 (07:17):
I think that's our problem is that we weren't really
sure if we were dating at the start, so as
you know what I mean, we're just sort of hanging out.

Speaker 3 (07:25):
Yeah, but we went on a dating site. We were
just hanging out.

Speaker 2 (07:28):
Yeah, but you were like interested. Yes, So what date
was it when you kissed her?

Speaker 4 (07:33):
Which run.

Speaker 3 (07:35):
I'm going to Yeah, but once it was a proper date.
I think it was pretty quick.

Speaker 1 (07:40):
Number four Nah, Well, I mean you don't count that,
like go for a run and eat some tie on
the lounge. That doesn't that's not a date, it's a date.
I was just hanging out. But I'll tell you what
second date. Second second tie on the lounge. I remember
telling a story. You know, We're sitting down chatting and
she sort of she just reach over and just touched
my shoulder to sort of accentuate her point. And I
remember thinking, I know what's going on here?

Speaker 3 (08:02):
So you waited for her?

Speaker 2 (08:04):
Did okay? So no? No? So we went for what
four runs? Then we had two tie days, and then
you kissed. Do not have a crack at me. I'm
only on second date with the guy that I went
to a movie.

Speaker 3 (08:16):
It's very different. It's very different. And they had two
times and tongues were probably burned. That's right, you you
had a different situation.

Speaker 2 (08:24):
No, I'm not. We're talking about kissing on the second date,
whether you should do it, Emma of Matcravat, what do
you reckon?

Speaker 4 (08:32):
You should you kiss on the first day?

Speaker 3 (08:36):
I agree? So what are you talking like, give it
a couple of hours, wait to the.

Speaker 1 (08:40):
End of the day.

Speaker 4 (08:42):
I mean, yeah, like do it, but it's when the
situation arises. But what if you get you know two, three,
four dates down the road with this person and then
you kiss and they are a really dud kisser.

Speaker 2 (08:52):
Like what you got to know?

Speaker 3 (08:53):
Now you got to know it's important.

Speaker 2 (08:56):
Okay, but I'm already past day two. So are you
challenging me for dates three? Are you?

Speaker 3 (09:01):
Yep?

Speaker 2 (09:04):
Straight out?

Speaker 1 (09:05):
Thanks?

Speaker 2 (09:05):
Emma Calle of Augustine Heights. What do you reckon kissing
after the second date?

Speaker 4 (09:11):
One hundred? You've got to just jump in and give
it a go. My husband actually tried to kiss me
on our first date and I did pick up on it,
and so I turned and gave him my cheek and
we ended up getting married.

Speaker 2 (09:26):
Give him Bunny Robin. I came to have his hash.
I came to Cali like, we were you like when
you actually did do it? Did like? Did it? Did
sparks fly? Or is it just andy climactic? Like kissing
is really amazing?

Speaker 3 (09:39):
Amazing?

Speaker 4 (09:39):
Yeah, it was amazing.

Speaker 2 (09:40):
It was that second date that we actually ended up kissing.

Speaker 3 (09:44):
This guy waited next to well three ubers didn't show up.

Speaker 2 (09:47):
Awkward, probably was putting off there don't touch me vibes.
I was feeling so awkward.

Speaker 1 (09:53):
Yeah, all right, one more, let's just see if this
is across the board, Casey out of Vicky point a
Casey Hello, think.

Speaker 4 (10:01):
Yes, absolutely, first date, during during.

Speaker 2 (10:04):
During the first date, what happens if it's a dodgy
one made?

Speaker 4 (10:09):
Well, my partner I met on plenty of fish and
we I don't even know what movie we watched, because yeah,
that's yeah.

Speaker 2 (10:17):
I see you're passing so much.

Speaker 3 (10:19):
Did you kiss in the movie or did you wait
the movie was over?

Speaker 4 (10:23):
Okay, in the movie.

Speaker 2 (10:24):
In the movie.

Speaker 4 (10:26):
About a month ago April first we got married, so
seven years ago.

Speaker 2 (10:29):
Okay, you can tell me to mind my own business.
But asking for a friend, like if you kissed on
the first date, what happened on the second, third, and
fourth date? And you know when did you actually sleep
with him? And I can ask you that because he's
now your husband.

Speaker 4 (10:45):
Well, we went back to my house that same day,
but not for you know, that one and only because
I had a puppy at the time and he was
loft in the bathroom, so I wanted to let him out,
and he just sort of came over and stayed and
then he never left.

Speaker 2 (11:02):
So it was after the first date that you slept
with him about a week or so, about a week.

Speaker 3 (11:11):
I am such a interesting by the way, that's code.
I've got a coupy. I've got a puppy in the bathroom.
You want to come inside.

Speaker 4 (11:19):
It was either puppy in the bathroom or he invited
me back to his auntie's house for tea.

Speaker 2 (11:25):
It's invovant Terry and Kids on Brisbane's Cheese ninety seventy three.
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