Erasing Shame

Jesus and Therapy? Yes. You can have both. — with Charles Mortensen

Let’s not sugarcoat it:

Needing help doesn’t mean you’re weak. It means you’re done pretending.

And therapy? It’s not a betrayal of your faith. It’s how some of us finally start to breathe again.

We’ve been told:

• “You just need to pray more.”
• “Therapy is for people who don’t trust God.”
• “If you were really spiritual, you wouldn’t struggle.”

Lies.

Straight-up lies t...

Church is supposed to be a sanctuary.

But what happens when it becomes the place that breaks you?

In this unfiltered and courageous conversation, we're diving into the kind of pain the Church doesn’t like to talk about—church hurt.

We're talking spiritual manipulation, toxic leadership, cult-like control, and the paralyzing guilt that keeps many trapped in pews, afraid to walk away.

Our guest, Simon Andrade—host of the ...

"He turned my mourning into dancing… and my ashes into beauty."

This episode will leave you speechless—in the best way.

When the unthinkable happened, Ruth Santana’s world shattered. A betrayal that could’ve broken her, but God wasn't done writing her story.Through deep valleys of pain, therapy, and the relentless love of Jesus, Ruth found redemption, restoration… and resurrection.

A marriage on the verge of ending.
A...

In this raw and courageous episode, we’re facing one of the hardest topics: narcissistic abuse.

Whether you grew up under the manipulation of a narcissistic parent, felt emotionally hijacked in a romantic relationship, or constantly feel drained by a “friend” who leaves you confused and questioning your worth—this episode is for you.

We’re not just talking psychology—we’re talking spiritual discernment, godly boundaries, and healing ...

This Episode Will Challenge EVERYTHING You Thought You Knew About Forgiveness! We’ve all heard it: “You HAVE to forgive AND reconcile.” But is that really what the Bible says?

If you’ve ever felt pressured to restore a relationship that wasn’t safe… If you’ve struggled with guilt for enforcing boundaries… If you’ve been told, “But that’s your FAMILY, you have to make peace,”—this episode is for YOU.

We’re diving into the TRUTH about...

Host Aggie Park and guest Joanne Choi explore the topics of money & wealth, through the lens of faith. In this thought-provoking episode, we dive into a challenging yet important question for people living in wealthy countries: Can we enjoy comfort and luxury while staying true to our deepest values and purpose?

💡What does it mean to live with purpose and integrity — even when you're surrounded by wealth and comfort?

✨ ...

Aggie Park has hand-picked this Season 8 theme—"Raw, Real, & Redeemed: Christian Faith, Struggles, and what We Don’t Talk About Enough." This first episode reveals her back story, shares her experiences on TikTok and Instagram, and why she wants to start podcasting to go deeper.

Asian American Christians often struggle with vulnerability due to performance-based cultural expectations that minimize emotional and mental ...

We close out season 7 with a great appreciation for Victoria hosting many poignant conversations. I (DJ Chuang) am very grateful for her life and she has shared that with us on Erasing Shame.

Finally, I briefly talk about how religion/spirituality is helpful to many people, but also has caused adverse side effects for others. That's the new direction with season 8''s new co-host. And that's enough for now.

Show Notes...

Do you know hard it is to deal with spiritual abuse? There's so many layers of complexities, mixed emotions, confusion from gaslighting, power dynamics, broken trust, and sometimes even worse.

Finding a freely available resource to help you heal and recover can be quite a long journey. I'd imagine having extra help would be welcomed. Here's a free online event coming January 21-25 from Broken to Beloved, the 3rd annual ...

trigger warnings: suicidal ideation, domestic violence, child abuse, family trauma, complex trauma, church hurt, spiritual abuse, depression

This extended episode is not easy listening and not family friendly. Prepare yourself for uncomfortable and painful storytelling before you tap the play button. Be ready to pause or stop listening when you feel triggered or it’s just too much. We know this is not for the faint of heart.

Wellne...

Our Asian American experiences are interwoven with multiple layers of pain and shame, intergenerational trauma, neglect, survival, both conscious and unconscious moments, that shape who we are, how we see the world, and how that shapes our spirituality in Christian churches.

In collaboration with Asian American Christian Network of Atlanta (AACNA), this is the unedited raw episode of our extended conversations for nearly 2 hours, w...

Han Namgung spent his formative years in Korea and Kenya, and he reflects on how his upbringing shaped his path toward a career in counseling. He explores the concept of feeling like a "forever traveler," navigating different cultures and communities. Additionally, he addresses the challenges of living in a society that prioritizes high achievement and status.

Han recognizes that shame is a common motivator and can stifl...

DJ Chuang and his younger brother Deef share openly about their personal mental health experiences with mental health, neurodiversity, and bipolar disorder. We noted the importance of finding containment to process emotions, especially in dealing with depression and lack of language.

We emphasized the need for gentle approaches to healing and the benefits of practices like therapy, journaling, and meditation. We touched upon the c...

A recurring sentiment is that the guilt-based theology about Christian salvation, known as soteriology, doesn't make sense to Asians and Asian Americans who have a honor-shame worldview.

Vincent Mo wrote up a research paper for a seminary certificate course, in which he reviewed academic papers, known as a lit review, that addressed soteriology from honor-shame perspectives, at the intersection of systematic theology, missions,...

“Is it a disgrace to be Born a Chinese? Didn’t God make us all!!! What right have you to bar my children out of the school because she is a chinese Decend.” These are some of the questions Mrs. Mary Tape wrote to the California Board of Education in 1885.

Marie Chan, author of Mamie Takes A Stand,  highlights a hidden figure in Asian American history: Mamie Tape. The journey of learning and sharing Mamie’s story grew from Marie’s ...

Content Warning / Trigger Warning: sexual violence/rape.

Midori Doumani is half Japanese and half Mexican and happy to share her heritage when directly asked. She navigates ambiguity about her perceived ethnic identity with compassion. As a kid and young adult, generationally infused shame affected her decisions. Her close-knit family dynamics and her desire to preserve the family's routine, led her to not disclose her own dis...

On this Erasing Shame conversation, Rev. Dr. Ken Fong explains the difference between toxic shame and healthy shame—how they're two different things. Toxic shame carries the message that there's something inherently wrong with oneself, leading individuals to either blame others or internalize the feeling and become worthless. Healthy shame, on the other hand, acknowledges mistakes and wrongdoings, allowing for growth and th...

How about a cold open? That's how this conversation starts with Justin Kiley (pronounced KEE-lay), where we talk about his Filipino heritage, specifically the Igorot tribe, how that flavors his experience with shame personally, given his family and cultural background, the complexities of church hurt, and how he found a healing community and authentic connection in Portland, Oregon.

Justin describes different degrees of church...

Content Warning / Trigger Warning: bullying, suicidal ideation, suicide attempt. CW/TW.

In this extended episode, Naomi Smith shows her prowess in storytelling in this conversation about how food affects brain health and how that is so important to life, walking through the challenges of being biracial, becoming a film maker, discovering the value of family history, and many more vignettes.

• Connect with Naomi Smith at https:/...