Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:01):
Look man, oh I see you. Why look over there?
How is that culture? Yes? Goodness? Last culture resta is calling.
Look at my sister beaming in the like, excuse me.
I have this little mini clip on panel that's that's
your eyes. But you have star quality and when you
(00:25):
smile reminds everyone of happiness. I don't know about that.
I do. I don't know about that, okay, because I
don't know. I feel like maybe this is this is Monday.
This is Monday brain. But are you do you have
Monday brain? I've got Monday brain. I had a sorry
to be a millennial I had I had the Sunday
(00:47):
is scary? What happened on Sunday? Nothing? Nothing happened on Sunday.
It was just that that that like the anxiety thing
of like lying in bed on on Sunday night. Oh no,
and I this is so hack. We can't talk about it.
I just didn't sleep well last Nay. And so of
course today I'm like, I don't know if anything's right.
It's because you were partying yesterday party of Stories. I
(01:09):
saw you at the Tide thing. I saw you Joel
Joel Kim Booster wanted to go for a couple of
hours we said yes, Joel. Joel told us to go,
and then as we left, he said, um. I was like, well,
at least that was safe, and he goes, yeah, but
it's like outdoor transmission isn't not a thing? And I
was like, then, why did you tell me to go
to the damn party? Well, now you have to be
quarantined because you have the big film coming up. I
(01:31):
have the big film coming up. Yeah I did. I
did realize today. I was like, we gotta we gotta
perm it up. Yeah, batting down the hatches. I'm coming
to New York for an undisclosed reason, and I'm also
going to be quarantined. I love that. And I'm just
gonna sort of be there for undisclosed reason which is
sort of not been announced, and I'll be quarantining myself,
(01:54):
but I will see my sister. Are you excited to
see me? How much one through ten? It is? The
meter is a oh can do you see the meter?
I'm showing you the meter right now on the zoom meter.
The dial is fucked up. Food bar as they would say,
oh my god, shaking our guest, shake your head because
(02:14):
of food bar, Because well I'm excited to see you
too very much, and excited to come back to New York.
I feel like I just got back to l a
world wind trip back to New York, and here we go.
We're gonna We're gonna be New Yorkers together. Oh my god.
You know, I I think New York might be might
(02:34):
be over soon. I think New York would be done.
Thank you. You have to stay there for so long
as a cast member of the big show that takes
place there. So how do you feel about being in
such a dead fucking city, as per your own words?
I don't because I'm telling you, I'm like depressed on
a Monday. I think I lolome to being a millennial
(02:56):
faga I was speaking of that I got. We have
to check in on on on Matt. Current events are
happening as we speak, we speak, and fucking Matt Damon's
only realized a couple of months ago, in the year
of our Lord One. You can't say faggot because he
said it at a dinner table as a joke and
his daughter was mortified. He said, what do you mean?
(03:19):
I said it on and stuck on you And we're
and we're supposed to think that that's like an okay
reason talking about Stuck on You, like it's like Broke
Back Mountain, Like it's a document we have to look
back on and say, like, yes, this, this point's true North,
Like it's the movie Stuck on You. Just because you
(03:39):
said it and the movie stuck on You, it doesn't
mean that you can say it now. I think it.
The only way it would have been okay for him
to bring up stuck on You would have been to
say Greg Kenear and I had anal sex. Yeah, I
can say it. And I've been like, yes, you can't
say it. Had him and Greg Knear when they sort
of got their prosthetic off because they famously played and
(04:00):
joined twins in the movie. Yes, this is a movie
that he held up in high regard, and he did
play conjoined twins with Greg Emir. I mean, had they
fucked on the movie set, and that's been part of
the sort of discussion at the dinner table. Then he
could say it all he wants. You have you have
Azalea Banks rights. You can say it, Azalia Banks rights.
(04:20):
So that's actually a really culture number one. Azalia Banks
rights means you well, gosh, I mean, we don't really
have to discuss that we would flopped by on a behavior. Well,
we hope that Mr Damon, you know, we give him
an entrepremental space to learn and grow, and I hope
you know in this little I mean, but in that piece,
I guess like that the guy who wrote that that
(04:42):
profile or whatever it was, opens with you know, he
Matt Damon's candor is that he says things that are
like he kind of rattles things off as if to
you know, make a headline. He's kind of like, sure, no,
I no, it's it's it's whatever I mean. But it's
(05:02):
just I think we just give him this time now
to hopefully I don't want to say learn and grow
because they feel like that's just not that those words
have been um rendered meaning less maybe since last summer.
But we we we wish, we wish him the best. Truly,
all he had to do was say nothing or just
(05:23):
be like make jokes about Ben Affleck and and j
Lo and like things would have been fine. But here's
the thing about Matt Damon. He constantly speaks out of turn,
like no one asked for him to say this. He
kind of just offered it, just like no one at
like he remember when he sort of fell for that
trick that the reporter was it was like in the
midst of me too, and this one reporter was like, okay,
(05:44):
so in time I love such a such a time,
a whirlwind culture shift, you know, And so remember when
he sort of fell for that reporter being like, so
in your opinion, what me too is our well what
what men should we be? Like let him off and
(06:05):
what men should we be? Like? Oh no, what they
did was really bad? And he did literally be like, Okay, well,
Harvey Weinstein's bad, but like this person is not so bad,
but this person is bad. Like he literally like went
in like as if we wanted to hear from him.
He totally fell for it. So I just think, like,
just just don't talk as much, Like you didn't need
to say faggot, this is this is something that we
(06:27):
all can learn from. We can all just do less.
We need new celebrities. I think I've been saying it
for years. I think we need new all new celebrities.
Sometimes I think about like who we've been talking about
for so long, and I'm like, we need a new
slate of famous people. I'm done. I I can't talk
about these people anymore. Our guest is absolutely raving. I
(06:49):
offer up our guests as one of the culture makers
new celebrity, new celebrity, literally new face. We have to
congratulate the US on getting JFL new faces for stand up. Well,
I want to hear all about how it went. I
want to hear all about how it went okay, and
then and then you must everyone must watch her new
(07:14):
visual feast especial if you want to call it that,
it's hard to categorize. And that is what our guest
does so well. It's called the Sarabac Team. It's on
Means TV work, her own streaming service. We love that.
Did you hear that Megan McCain dragged Kathy Griffin today?
Our producer Megan McCoy dragged I just but did you
see the news that she like dragged Kathy Griffin today?
(07:37):
Because well, Kathy Griffin she has cancer, and so they
brought that up on the view and Megan McCain said,
I think it's terrible that she has cancer. One time
she made fun of my best friend who's like my brother,
Clay Akin, for being gay, and this was like it
really hurt him and her best friend well, Clay Akin
is Megan McCain's best friend, so she says. So. Then
(07:59):
after all that, Clay posted a photo of Cathy Griffin
and him on Twitter like hugging, and he was like
love Kathy Griffin, nothing but light and support. And one
time she even hosted a charity for me, and like,
I just thought it was so funny, like two women
are fighting over Clay Aiken in this in this year
of our Lord. I think I think Heathy Griffin isn't
(08:19):
fighting with anyone I should. I think she simply came
out and announced that she has lung cancer, and I
think all we needed to do with support her. But
that's not what our producer Megan McCain did. She said,
sad that she has cancer. But I don't like her
because one time, twenty years ago, she dragged my friend
Clay Aiken for being gay, which is like, hello, fun
was her last day when I thought it was supposed
(08:40):
to be Friday, but apparently she's back this week. And
then Mary Trump came on to promote her new book
and Megan McCain sat out the interview, and Mary Trump
called her out on are for being a coward and
not wanted to do the interview with her. So there
was drama today, even in Megan McCain's last week. I
think Megan is Megan is part of the people who
just need to be replaced celebrity. So you do agree,
(09:01):
we all we need all these celebrities. I didn't disagree
when you when you mentioned that earlier, you were hesitant. No,
not at all. I proposed I yes and did even
you can do with comedy the best thing you're gonna
do in comedies. It's a real culture. It's really culture
number seven, the best thing you can do. Yes, yes,
(09:23):
and and when I yes and did you, I said,
our guest deserves to be in the new slate, on
the new roster. Just such such a fantastic multi talented
artist of visual art, genius, practical gore body, horror savant um.
Please check out the Saravaccine on means tv UM and
(09:46):
JFL new Face, Powerhouse, powerhouse performer and part of the
wonderful collective health Trap Nightmare. They just moved from Chicago
to l A. We're so happy to have her. Everyone,
Please welcome. Say eras O, you're laughing at my ass off,
I see you. I didn't see you make a peep.
(10:08):
I didn't. I thought you were frowning and judging. I
was whooping and hollering, whooping, hollering. It's literally a front
runner of the title about literally, do you play basketball? Really? Not?
Remember day in my hoof you seem like you could
play ball. You seem like you could ball. You really do?
Because have six ft one Yeah? Never never. You act
(10:33):
like you've never seen the girl. She stands at five
ft seven. I'm gonna say, am I am? I correct
nice for you to say it is five ft five,
but I do find myself more imposing than five ft five.
I remember you as like a five nine girl. I'm
gonna say, I remember you being a little taller than me,
or you know, you made me feel small, which is
what every game man wants to feel. And I'm annoying,
(10:57):
so my energy shoot upwards. You have a you have
a resonant, annoying energy that goes right through your head.
I have the same thing. Hello, do you think you
you I self identify as annoying. Absolutely, I'm trying. I
think we should proclaim the title. Oh that's that's so powerful, Like, oh,
(11:19):
I'm like I walk into a room and you're gonna
be piste off in ten minutes because I'm here. But
you're able to, like you're able to like refract it
through like a little prism that you're like you're self
aware of, and like it comes up as like, oh,
but she's like cool, like she like she can do
like she can she can challenge that this voice or whatever.
(11:43):
Like I feel like that's like the Sarah squirm, Like,
you know what, cool annoying girl. It's honestly so nice
of you to say. But then when someone is performing
annoying and they're self aware of it, it almost makes
you chaotic evil because you know how annoying you're being,
and yet nevertheless she persists, you don't you don't use
your powers for good, you in fact inflicted on the
(12:06):
people watching. I think all three of us can be
called empoweringly annoying. We can. It's it's like, I I'm
okay with being annoying. What's the what do you all?
What do you both think is the most annoying thing
about you? If you're to self examine first, I fucking
use like awful vocabulary words like sah t, words that
(12:28):
no one above the age of seventeen should ever use.
That's my disease. I think I'm annoying because I often
make things about myself and um feel the need to
perform at all times and what would be considered relentlessly
um uh, sort of needing to be the center of attention.
(12:50):
So that's okay, I've follow up to that. But okay, interesting, Sarah,
what about you? I would say that I'm annoying because
I need to look like a clown who just hopped
right out the clown car all times, all eyes on
me in the center of a ring, just like, what's
your follow up? My follow up is, Okay, how do
(13:12):
you guys feel about this statement? From like like uh,
someone who comes in and is like, I don't know,
you guys do too many bits. It's like it's hard
to hang out around comedy people because it's all the time.
I think we've been on I think we've all been
on both sides of that though, right, Like we've all
been in a rumor like this is too much, I
(13:32):
don't like this, and then we've all been on the
side of it where it's like we're doing we're engaging
in the bit to read, right, Yeah, I think that
I've definitely. Like I used to date someone who often
was not comfortable around the comedian group of friends because
(13:53):
there was a lack of I guess, genuine conversation or
like maybe it was kind of taking over and I
was just like, yeah, but sometimes sometimes you got to
just go for it to entertain yourself. I don't know.
I when people are like I, I the one person
who was left out of this didn't feel right about it,
I'm like, well, then maybe this isn't the space for you,
(14:16):
right that. If I feel left out of something, I'll
be like, cool, I'm not going to do that again.
I don't know. I don't say. I have noticed there
are people who run their stage bits on you and conversation.
That's awful. I hate that. And you can tell because
it's like a little too built out and the references
(14:36):
are a little two pointed and they're positive for laughs, Yeah,
they're holding a microphone at the restaurant. I think it's
fine if someone's doing a bit and then they discover
something and then later you see it on stage. But
if you've sort of seen it on stage and then
it happens to you in real life, that's spooky. That's
that's like scary. That's really tough. Ever been at a
(15:00):
show and someone's performing and they're like, so I was
talking about my friend the other day and then blah
blah blah blah x y z And then you're like,
I'm the friend from the other day. Oh chilling. Um,
that is chilling. You have goose bumps. You're pointing to
your damn arm, damn arm, and you guys want to
know what goose bumps is in French and I think
it's so fucking cool. Oh my god. He's like sort
(15:21):
of circling back to the thing he said about himself
that is annoying and bravely going there. No, that's a
that's a vote. Now I'm talking about like s a
T words. This is a French translate. This is another language,
so it's totally different. It's not annoying entertainment in France
because growing up you would read goose Bumps and then
(15:42):
you read the French version in Canada and in Quebec
and it would be che the pool. But speaking of Montreal,
Sarah tell us all about the wonderful festival just for laughs. Well,
your girl Sarah did the festival just for laughs. In
Los Angeles in a room full of own the industry people,
and after I got on stage, every comedian came up
(16:03):
to me and said, it looked like you did fifteen minutes.
If there's sort of five, did you go over? In fact,
we haven't performed in a while. My biological clock thob
I would say, I didn't, dudean, you wouldn't know if
(16:25):
you did fifteen, I would wait. Okay, So I did
see the light. And for those listening, light sometimes means
to what did they did? They tell you explicitly what
the light was, so they go, they go this, they go,
red light, you got a minute left, flashing red light,
it's time to go off. I'm there, I'm having I'm
(16:49):
whooping and holler. I'm really so, I'm like, I don't
wait for the flesh to happen. Never see the flow.
And this is true, you're not gas lighting. No, I
saw the light and then they never flash it. Emergency emergency.
(17:10):
We you were the police were getting off the same Yeah,
you gotta go. Yeah. I didn't get the scolding light,
and I almost got the I only got the courtesy light. Yeah,
that's though. I did six and then I get off
and and one of our dear friends, who shall remain nameless,
said something to the effective felt like ten say their names,
(17:33):
say their name? What who cares? Who was it? Drag
Sydney who has never been on time to anything? Like
I'm sorry, no, no really? Also what Sydney has never
gone over ys, never run the run the come on?
I don't say this. I wish she would have because
(17:54):
I like to see her perform. That's what I'm saying.
It's like if you run the light. It's like they
should be so lucky. You're up there for double the
time you're supposed to. You guys are playing me X. Meanwhile,
I'm giving you two X, I'm giving you three X.
That's saying you're giving an arc mama. And it's so
funny because like I was a comedian in Chicago for
(18:15):
like three d four thousand, five hundred years. Now I'm
forty nine years old. It is true, how it's those
things are so important then and then yeah, it's it's funny,
isn't it? And now you did it? And now it's
like over and it's over and and you know what
my and you know what someone said to me, I go,
they go, how is the how was JFL I go, fine,
(18:38):
they go, You know what, if you bombed, then the
show would have been important. But you crush the house down. YEA.
Saying that it's fine is probably the best fucking outcome. Yeah,
that's good job. And if I don't see twenty million
(19:01):
in the bank by two years from now, then the
festival needs nothing. I can tell you. I went in
and it was years before i'd see it was years.
Forty years had to pass for I said, my bank
account finally reached twenty mill And you're also forty nine
years I'm forty nine. Well, busy, Phillips math, I'm forty nine,
(19:27):
sitting in front of sitting in front of a roth, Go, Sarah,
did you paint all this yourself? The mural? It's gorgeous.
I mean I went insane over the pandemic. Well, my
mind did. To our right is a t mural of eyeballs.
And that's a door you can't tell. Oh my god,
I love that you painted the door. That's hot a
(19:48):
square eyeball. But you've never seen one of those before.
Well maybe in some SpongeBob square pants. Maybe it's some
random universe forever. Yeah, maybe in some rand other universe,
like a cartoon or something in the Lego movie. Certainly
never on this plane. You guys, we laughed so hard
(20:09):
or being stupid, being the most stupid creatures. Tell us
the funniest thing you've ever seen? Serious, Yeah, tell us
the one moment you laughed the most like, and then
we'll both we'll all say the funniest thing we literally
ever seen. Yeah, Okay, it's really I can't describe it. Okay, wait,
(20:33):
matt you're from Long Island. Oh yeah, we have a
lot to talk about schedule over the next hour. Yeah,
we'll get there, Sleepy if Mattress company exists. Yeah, I
don't know if it's actually it's one of those things
where it's like that could be a local thing or
a national thing. I don't know, but it felt it
(20:55):
certainly felt very local. Well, this is when I go, Okay, Hi,
my name is Sarah Nicole. I'm going to open a
mattress store. What do I call it? Sleep He's yeah, millions?
That really works. Okay, So, how was this the funniest
thing You've ever seen? When I was like him, and
there was a Sleepy's commercial on the television and there
(21:16):
was a kid jumping on his bed so crazy. So hi,
Oh my god, that is so funny thinking about a
kid jumping on their beds so crazy. Literally, I'm laughing,
(21:36):
what are you talking about? I am the laughing my
ass off l m A oh laugh, my fucking ass off,
like boying boying boy And he was like jumping on
his sleeping match just crazy. Oh my god, he lost
his absolute mind? Was he like a kid? He was
like a little tiny guy. And then I like, can't
even okay, Well, the punchline is he's mactress crazy style
(22:02):
and the SATs go boying, boing boying. That's the before
the sleepy mattress. Oh my god, yeah, sleepy mattress. He's okay.
That is literally so funny, and we lost because of it.
(22:24):
What happens the sleepy is bad. That's literally one of
the funniest things I've ever heard. Alright, So I want
to I want to hear the end of that, but
there can keep going on. The sleepy mattress and the
kids jumping on the bed crazy style. Instantly falls asleep.
(22:47):
Minute years later, I was woken awake in the night.
That's three, all right, and I was like, I need
to find this commercial from my and I found it.
Oh God, you'll have to polist when this episode so
everyone can can see is this a cartoon boy or
(23:11):
a real boy? And that's the thing, it's a real boy.
Oh I drinking. Surely in my head I thought it
had to be a cartoon boy because what you were
describing was just so funny. You can't go because I'm
gonna do too too, because I realized I have too
that it's so tired, it's so tired. Wait, can everyone
(23:35):
do their once so I can find the exact person,
last name of the person who said, all right, do
you want to go first? I have? Well, okay, so
I had to do this thing, uh for uh where
I had to I had to find I'd sift through
old photos and that and what I did before I
deleted Facebook like five years ago, is just like download
it all my old photos, saved them on this drive
(23:57):
and then I looked through my old profile picks and remember,
like two thousand nine was such a dark period in
Facebook culture. Do you guys remember this? And it was
like right around like probably when I discovered Reddit, and
like it was just like random you know, like random
mass photos that made you laugh even though like nothing
was really happening in them. And have you guys seen
(24:18):
the photo of the Llama or the I'll pack it
with no legs, and and it was just like a lump.
It's just a worm, like a furry worm. That's it's
an l and like it's it's And I think that,
and I looked back that I was like I back
then thought it was the funniest thing I'd ever seen
in my life. And now I look at it, I
feel nothing, and I'm like I was, I was a
(24:41):
disgusting person in two thousand nine. No, that is so funny.
The ll pack up. It's only a body and a worm,
a fuzzy worm. That was literally so funny. It's a
blest of me that that's my number. Random humor. It's
random humor, Random humor. Bring back random humor, Matt, what's
we need to bring back random? Okay? So I I
(25:02):
have to um, they're sort of like both musical sequences
in film. So, first of all, my runner up is
in Muppet Treasure Islands when they're taking the roll call
and they cut to this one gorgeous woman and she says,
I she's literally so beautiful playing with gender. Yes, it
(25:28):
really was so shocking and the head laugh. And in
that same movie, Um, that's my runner up, and my
one from muppetres Island is the cabin Fever sequence. You
ever seen Muppe Treasure Island when they do where you
got Kevin Fever? Anyway, that I probably watched a million times.
And also the Dulach song from the song went from that,
(25:51):
the little like when they opened the box and the
Dulach song happens. Yes, I know the whole thing perfect that.
I think I watched that a million. Yeah, and they
did this play where it's like, um, your shoes up
your face. Yeah, that was so funny. It is literally
(26:19):
the fuck up Shrek holds the key. It's actually Ruler
culture number fifty. Shrek holds to humor, stinky onions. That's right. Yeah,
there was. There was not a scene in Shrek that
wasn't so funny. Absolutely, I'm making waffles. Oh please. When
(26:45):
he said I'm making waffles, I was like, that is hilarity, Sarah,
what's your second thing? Well, then in the time I
also thought of I thought of two more things that
are really funny. I've never both more. I did not
Bragg I did a show at the Hollywood Improv I've
ever heard of it last week in a comic known
(27:06):
as wing Fetterman, he's one shouts out to you, shouts
out to sucking you, gets on stage and he says,
you know what comedy? If I can make one person
in this room laugh, oh, would sucked. They're like forty
people in there. That's really I would suck. There's like
(27:31):
forty people, inaire. I love that he would shoot himself,
and I had to think that that's that's my impression
of wife delivered it much better. And I've never seen
the man's comedy, but my impression of him can't be
right either. And you're gonna see him and you're gonna
be laughing. I'll be laughing my ass off. And then
(27:52):
the other joke that I just thought of that this
is actually the funniest joke of all time from the
Three Amigos, and they're like, oh, is that that's a
male plane? And someone else goes, how can you tell?
Can't you see his little balls? Oh? Man? Really good
reaction out of you guys. But no, it's okay. You
have to hear it from the horse's mouth. Bowen, what's
(28:16):
your second what's your second funniest thing you ever heard? Mine?
Mine is like, I think it's something from like the
south Park movie when like like Hussein pulls out his
dick or something, I don't know, Like that was like
as a kid, I was like, that's the funniest thing. Absolutely.
Also remember in Team America World Police when they had
(28:36):
the really long sex scene and the puppets were like
fucking Also when that movie started and the puppets started
to come out, I literally me and my cousin were screaming, laughing,
rolling on the floor of the fucking sticky theater. It
was we couldn't believe that was the movie. Wait, um no, okay,
I have I have I have a third thing. I
have a third thing. And this because because the Team
American thing reminded me of this in the Reno nine
(28:57):
one one Miami and the movie the best movie of
all time, the best there's there's like a whole scene
where like Um, Jim Dangling, Treaty White Belt, Um Carry
Kenny Silver and Thomas London's characters are are in the
motel about to have sex. They start to look up
and then it cuts to this, guys, what I'm talking
about its insane sex between two people with incredible bodies,
(29:18):
and then and then it pulls out to the wide
and it's these two other people and the guy says,
oh my god, someone's filming. I've never seen it, but
I'm laughing. It's so good across the board. Everyone in
the movie is so funny. Carry Kenny Silver kills it.
(29:40):
When you see Nash is unbelievable. There's a rock. The
rock is in it for like two seconds and then
explodes like it's so good. Also, Paul Rudd has a
cameo and it's just it is so pupidus and it's
so dumb. And I used to I used to like
watch that get it again and again and think, why
(30:01):
aren't more people talking about this. We've had to talk
about it on this pod before. I don't think we've
really talked about it anyway. It's so funny. I did
three mat what what do you have a third one?
Do I have a third one? Oh my god? I
mean when I saw adult ziem happen, I do. I've
never felt like that before. I I would describe it
as beyond euphoric, like it felt like it felt like
(30:22):
it's something happened to my body where like I've I
don't know if I'll ever replicate how how much joy
I got from watching him say Adele does em and
then the cut to her and I just I've never
And that was the number one moment in a culture history,
of course, but it bears repeating because it really was
(30:45):
was so freaking funny. Sarah has her hand raised that
I'm calling on you, Yes, Sara in a can I
pose a counter to that? Yeah, I'm gonna do impression
of this really important. I mean, if that's going to
be the number one in culture history, there's gonna be
a saren iCal number one history. I'm gonna do an
impression of it, and you guys have to guess what
it is. And I actually hope you've discussed this onrong
(31:05):
this podcast, as it is a cultural touchdown. Okay, okay,
Oh my god, I'm so excited. Yeah, the grape stomping
lady something. Oh and it sucks because you know she's
in a lot of pain. But oh no, is that true?
(31:27):
I think like her like she cracked a rib and
it like fully impaled her alone. That's why she sounds
like it's not quite that but she was. She was
I think she was hospitalized, but she also sucked. She
was such she was such a little piece of ship.
And the lead up to that, they were like, stop
(31:48):
stomping in the grape did she a little stomping? No? No, no? Yeah. Well,
and then in the lead up there, like they cut
to her from like the news desk and she's like, Okay,
we're here at the winery. What are we doing? Like
she just like was such a fucking, fucking dumbass. I
don't know. I would also like that mat has his
hands raised. Yeah. I would like to say another really
(32:09):
funny thing that happened, which was one of the funniest
things ever that ever happened, which is Scarlett takes a
tumble when Scarlett maybe we kiddy to kidther. Yeah there
were look boom boom boom. Oh no, she she posted
(32:34):
it. It It was like l O L. She thought it
was so funny. Scarlett was unlike the grapes something lady,
not critically injured like she She moved on and got
the humor of it. But I just couldn't believe that
someone would set up and record themselves singing so seriously,
and then the way it fell. Oh my god, Sarah
(32:57):
Sarah something else, Yeah, she had. I would also like
to propose another really funny moment that happened in culture. Yes,
of course, of course you have your hand raised. I
(33:19):
like to call on you. This is classic, this and
this is there's nothing more two thousand nine than this mhm.
Sitting on the toilet. Oh yeah, sitting on the toilet. Yeah,
honestly that was viable videos like nothing happened and one
(33:41):
thing happens in them. And now it's like on TikTok
you get full stories and ship and like it's so
like rich and like so much. It's so dense. But
like back in the day, early viral video days like
double Rambo, we wouldn't shut the funk up about it
for like two months. No, yeah, we also bowing. I mean,
you know, what's really still the test of time? You
(34:03):
know what? I like, the most parts gets done? How
am I? And this is my counterpoint to the tock
of it all parts sitting on the turtlet. We're talking
about moments in time. We're sheer total violence that happens spontaneously.
(34:32):
We question authenticity with we question We'll never have a
lemon party again. I think we're past Lemon party or
like your girls remember like true Girls One Cup, like
where you were like, I don't think we'll ever have
like shock moments like that ever Again on the internet.
(34:52):
I have to say I've never I've never been able
to get through two girls one cup. Why not king shaming,
You're king shaming. They're enjoying it. I know they're enjoying it,
and I celebrate them. I just when I tried to
watch it, it was like it was okay, no, I
(35:14):
can't even talk about it as you can see, how
do you say goose bumps? Again? I know I had
shelled the pool everywhere when I tried to watch that
myself is my pronunciation? Good shall the pod? Yeah that's
really good. You guys are really good, either of you.
And I'm serious about this grew up? No girl, girl?
(35:40):
What was that time either of you in earnest and serious? Yeah?
YouTube searched epic fail. Oh my god. I can tell
you our college pals and this includes like you know
probably right, yeah, this is like this is like and
a Dresden Andrew Farmer, Like are that little coterie of
(36:03):
people when we were all, like, you know, in school
together like we would just go to each other's dorms
or apartments and then like look up epic failed and
they're still cut they're still cutting them together. It'll be
like best Epic Fails Q one one, like they're common compilations.
The compilations are nuts or the their themes like you know,
sled epic fails, dog water epic fail. You know, like
(36:26):
all these so many categories, so many verticals of epic fails.
And I mean it's a whole like sector of the
Internet that's still thriving as much as we're like, oh,
epic fails, remember those? So for me it was like
probably like three years ago as recent. I know that
that seems recent, but as recent as three years ago.
What about you? I'm begging both of you on your hands,
(36:49):
on my hands, and goddamnnews, I am in treating you.
This is something I did at a low point in
the pandemics. I don't I'm not too proud to say
I have and you YouTube fail and no, what did
you do? Oh no, I'm gonna say estimate the humble estimate,
(37:17):
three hour minimum, great news anchor film, Oh I love
news anchor fails. Also, like when they accidentally say like
fag and they're trying to stay flag and starry flat one.
The one news anchor Field rued to roll up. All
we all are an agreement on what that is, right,
(37:38):
we say it because it's escaping me. And I'll say,
do you know what I'm about to say? Like the
ultimately yeah, yeah, yeah, no no, no no, no, it's
next definitely have the person who climbed the highest mount
into the world, Mount Everest. But he's gay. Excuse me,
he's he's but he's gay. No, no, he's blind gay,
(38:15):
it's really but he's gay. Oh my god. No, No,
he's blind. I'm sorry, he's blind. Her trying to save it. No,
so he's blind. So we're here. We'll hear more on
that later. And didn't she come back? After the break?
I was like, I'm so sorry. I think I said
(38:37):
he's gay, but you know he is blind and he's here, Sarah,
what were you malving? What were you molding? I couldn't
make it out, make it back to the microphone that
come back? Come back? Interesting is that you? You know
you said I I remember the funniest thing that's ever happened,
miss speaking, and I was miss speaking I was lying
(38:58):
the the the news anchor with mid speaking, and you said,
that's the funniest thing. And I'm noticing a pattern with
me where I always think that the funniest news anchor fails,
or when there's a medical when they like faith. So
I was mouthing stroke and she started having I did
(39:26):
think that was immediately sad, but at the time it
was like, what the hell happened here? Yeah, so that
you can deal with that, you brought up sad stroke
on television and punctured long grape lady who's never the
same someone people who are bodily This is body horror you.
(39:56):
This actually is an excellent transition. I'd say, bow yeah.
I because on every episode of Lost Coach, which is
an abbreviation for the podcast Last Culture Ristas, which is
really even more of an abbreviation for Lost Culture Rests
with Matt Rogers and Bell and Young. The working title
of this podcast, um, we ask every guess, well, was
the culture that made you say? Culture was for you?
(40:16):
Do you understand the question? I really I do to
a fault too. I have too many things to say
and I'm saying, well, I'll say this to prepare and
I say, I'm gonna go on less cultures. I'm gonna
go on last time. I'm gonna do my goddamn research. Okay,
I'm gonna listen. In an episode with my dear friend
(40:40):
and sister, Ruby mccallista, I was thinking about I was
thinking about that episode the other day because of the
way she says, that's that kultrina Jack, that's Jack. She
was saying, I had an l a jack l She
she that was dark A culture was a highlights. Everyone,
please listen. Ruby mccollster, one of the most perceptive, funniest
(41:03):
raw raw talent people. You truly nobody listened to that
episode considering that fucking bitch said what I wanted to say?
What did you say? That fucking bitch? My best fucking
friend said the culture that was most influential to be
(41:29):
I wonder if that's why we're friends. What three years
ago when she went on the show, it said that
the most influential culture to her was Peewee's. Goddamn motherfucking
this makes so much sense for both of you, and
especially you. Let's leave her out. Let's leave Ruby out
of it. Take her out of the narrative for a
(41:50):
damn second, what did Peewee mean to you? Everything? It
was like the first thing where I was like, okay, okay,
this is all right? And by way, has anyone ever
done it? Since? I don't think so. People try, and
by the way, humiliatingly they try. They should be ashamed
(42:12):
for how they try. Do we think that? Like No,
I was, I can't think of anything. It's just the
only like thing that's like, okay, this is when I
go crazy. Okay, you want to hear my crazy? The
only total works of complete and total arts play house
(42:33):
with I just just how was it advised? Two nights
ago at S and l A. Were you there? No?
Literally it was. It was truly, it was truly wild
to watch it again because it is a perfect it's
a perfect movie. You're like, no one's this was the
first movie ever made, and no one's made a movie since. Interesting,
(42:59):
it's kind of fascinating. And also I'll say this for
this movie and then we can return to Peewee. But
I just want to say the special effects of the
twister sequence, it's actually really scary and jarring. How real
it looks like it's very like like obviously they had
to do practical effects it was night I guess when
they shot it, and then it was released in thirty nine.
But like she's truly like fighting against the winds. It's
(43:22):
so scary with it. When they're all going down into
the to the to the cellar and they close it
behind them and she doesn't make it. It looks really
real and the twister looks great in the background, like
for the time. It's crazy to say nothing of like
the rest of the visual treat that is the movie.
Have you guys seen that whole feature at where Angela
Landsbury like talks about like all of the crazy ship
(43:44):
that went down with the Wizard of Oz. I mean,
I it's been on since I've seen it, but like
all like the casting craziness with the tin Man and like,
oh my god, like it's nuts. And then um, but
then my the thing that I will never forget about,
which is this is so dumb. But like you know
the shot of um, the house tumbling down in the landing. Yes,
that's just like them on like a stage, pointing the
(44:06):
camera to the floor and then then dropping a little
house figurine. That's how they didn't talk about the intro
sequence to Pee Wee's playhouse. That's allures, and like let's
go back to pee Wee because pee Wee, like it
totally tracks in your work, like it fully is like
a new fucked up grotesque version of like of that
(44:29):
of like I mean like talk about like practical gore
ship for you, because like that is commitment. That is work.
That is like manual crafting of art, and you have
to wear it and you have to like time it
out and like kind of like I feel like I'm
everyone please watch Sara Vaccine and all of stairs work.
It's it's it's but talk about like your relationship with
(44:51):
making that stuff. I so I haven't learned how to
make it real until I moved to Los Angeles and
all my friends are movie magic maker and so like
I was living in Chicago for like you know whatever
three thousand years and making being like, oh, I want
to make an effect where like I make these big
clay veiny boobs with big Pepperoni pizza nipples, And so
(45:13):
how do I make the milk like shoot out of
the nipples. Oh, obviously, what I have to do is
put a tube through the nipple and fill my mouth
with milk and then blow milk through the tube and
so could you know what I mean? I was doing
like like arts and crafts, like like rubber bands and
tape kind of practical effects, which is kind of I
mean that's like you know, crafty, campy whatever, and like
(45:35):
all in four like I love Pewee and like Wizard
of Oz because it's all this like very tact dial
it's like an immersive universe that you can like reach
out and touch, and it's like, you know, I think,
like because I make a lot of you know, arts
and craft the aesthetic, I hate that words. It sounds
like kind of like cheap, and it also or either
it's not like I think people are like, oh, you're
(45:58):
you do d I y stuff so we can hey
you like no money to do your thing, even though
it's like you know what I mean. But now I
moved to I moved to l A and then I
made Saravaccine with my friends who are like real special
effects artists. So I'm like learning how to not do
stuff that's just like milk with tubes and stuff. Like
my friend Heiress Genius Genius works at the like special
effects shop that like made all these like practical effects
(46:21):
horror movies that I love and like it was part
of a team that made the masks for Slipnot and
I'm like, so major snowe major. Moving to l A,
it's fun because you're you're surrounded by people whose job
it is to professionally make stuff crazy style and everyone
is like a genius problem solver and an artist and
(46:44):
like it's just cool. Like you know, in Chicago, if
I wanted to make a pimple exploding with pus, I
was like, oh, I don't know anything, like so I
just filled like a bubble wrap bubble with vasoline and
then painted it to look like or whatever that sounds.
That sounds like a solution, though it's definitely a solution.
And then I moved here and my friends are like, oh,
(47:05):
this is how you do with like silicon and all
this cool stuff. And I still don't really know how
to do anything. But it's just kind of like fun
to like mess around and stuff. And I think that's
why I like practical effects, because it's like, I think
lost so much by foregoing practical effects. I really do.
(47:25):
I think that, Like, for example, like like when they
first tried to reboot Star Wars and like the Natalie
Portman era of Star Wars as as I call them,
like all the Aliens being c G. I like it
made it feel just it just took me out. Yeah,
and then like they got better in the in the
next reboot, like the Daisy Ridley era. Um, but like
(47:50):
but you know it's true, like you know, you could
never get the magic of something like Wizard of Oz
now because they would overdo it because they love to
throw money at the problem. In that way, maybe it's
even easier for them to put things in and post
like you could never do Jaws now if they tried,
it would be embarrassing and it wouldn't be scary. And
with with Wizard of Oz, it's like obviously they were
(48:12):
playing with like now we're going into color and like
you know all that stuff. So there's so much to
play on, especially like VA V, like the world of
filmmaking up until that point. But it's so interesting to
think of those as like the things that you respond
to because you do genuinely work with that stuff. And
then when you move to l A, you are around
so many more people that are capable of that. And
(48:32):
I would imagine bow and like you see, like magic
get made every week at your job. But I remember
my first experience with that was like when they put
Mitra and I an alien makeup for the My friend
Molina did your makeup and she is incredible, incredible and
her everyone she works with is amazing. And it was
really wold because I've obviously been in makeup trails affording,
(48:54):
but really just to get like on camera makeup done,
and then these people put us put so many extras
into full on alien guiche and it was so involved
and so impressive and we were laughing, dying, laughing, Metro,
we had the most so funny, you both so funny,
but it's just like people are capable of such like
(49:15):
Wizards beyond, and it's fun And it's what Sarahs thing
is that it's funny. There's something funny about you and
Metra being in this like silly fucking but real you know,
alien makeup, and like, I don't know, like you're so right, Sara,
And that's a little sad that like no one's done
it like peewee, since on like that scale, I think
(49:37):
it's really expensive in a way that's like, you know,
like if you and Metro were gonna be animated aliens
for that, I think it would have been cheaper, but
then you lose the magic of like obviously animation is
like major and it's like three thousand people working together,
but like you're in a room with like eight people
(49:58):
who are all up in your face, and it's like
it's inherently social and like more present. I think why,
especially now, I think there's a deep desire within me
to like really hold onto the practical is because like
we just spent a year and a half in isolation,
like and I think it's it isn't easier to do
wait made up right? Sorry? Sorry, sorry, keep you know
(50:27):
what I mean. Though, It's like, obviously I love animation, major, major,
but you can kind of do it like a bunch
of different people at different computers on different sides of
the planet. Well, when you do it all in post,
it's like, of course it's appealing because you're able to
control it up until you know you hit export. But
it's like you got to make the decision on the
day if you want to do it all practical, and
(50:49):
like you and and and doing things practical means that
you have to have the confidence in what you're doing.
You've got to know what you're going for like before
before goes somewhere else to get like you know, cut
together or whatever the hell totally and it's like first
Sara vaccine I had to make, um my friend Heiress
had to make. I'm just like obsessed with them, and
(51:10):
literally everybody go be obsessed with aarrison and hire them
to do everything. They had to make like a crazy
fucked up facial prosthetic, and so I had to get
life casted, which meant me sitting in a chair for
three hours while the dunk you and dunk you and
the goose and the goops and like silicone and plaster
bandages or whatever, and it's just three hours of like
(51:33):
complete and total surrender. You're like, I just have to
trust the people I'm with. It's totally meditative and it's
like you don't have to like there is this like weird,
sick element of danger when you are doing practical effects.
Like the other week, me and Airis had to make
a head explode and it's like, you know, obviously no
one's getting hurt, but the little like possibility that maybe
(51:54):
someone could maybe get hurt, that's fun. Yeah, yeah, yeah,
it's danger. Who who did you make up? When you
did Bernie Sanders, when you when you played Bernie, you
you had one of the best Bernie's that's the same
girl who did Matt Meetzra's makeup. Oh, Molina Saylina's full
name because Melina Sterns and like truly truly great. Well
(52:20):
I think that's prol Ali to Maguela Cutty. Yeah, there was.
There was like a whole team there and it was
such a it was such a wild day because like
it was honestly worth doing. Obviously it was fun to
be in a Katie Perie video, but just to have
the experience of being put into makeup like that, Like
you hear like the stories of like when Jim Carrey
did The Grinch, you know what I mean, Like that
(52:41):
he was truly in like six hours of makeup every
single day, and you kind of take for granted, like
just how much effort that is and how hard that
is and to keep it the continuity and to perform
in that. Also, what it does to you as a
performer when you are put into makeup like that, you
really do I'm alive, Like it really changes who you are.
(53:03):
And she had those fingers like can you imagine, like
you watch the granch and you're like, okay, best wormers
of all time. Literally, I'm in agreement. You know what,
Like you if you got to wear those fingers per day,
you'd be a different person. Yeah, you'd be You'd be
justesticulating all over the place, pointy little fingers. And Molina
(53:25):
did the old Man Bernie makeup. I was like, can
you give me prosthetics to make me look old? And
she was like, actually, I want to try this technique
I've never done before. And I go, I'm obsessed with you.
I'd let you do anything you want to take my body,
it's yours. She did this weird thing where she put
all this like strange glue on my face that made
my skin like stick to itself so that it produced
(53:47):
natural looking wrinkles without like additive prosthesis. Oh my god. Yes,
it was very disturbing because it was my skin behaving
as if I were years old. Cool. Um wait, I
(54:08):
had another thing to ask you. Oh my god, you guys,
you guys, have you have you have either of you
ever watched that reality competition show. It kind of got
like buried. I think it's still on. It's called Face Off,
and it's like practical, it's practice, it's effects makeup people
all like it's and all like having to compete and
like come up with all the challenges are insane and
themed and it's like these people are wizards and witches
(54:31):
and like just magicians. It's crazy crazy. I have never
seen that show, but one of my friends was on it, Joe,
and it's funny. Like anytime. I'm like, oh, like I
had to paint a backdrop on like paper. Actually, for
(54:51):
Sara Vaccine, I had to paint these big hands painted
back backdrops that were like ten ft by ten ft,
And after I paid to them, I was like, shoot,
I gotta roll these have to transport them to the
filming location. But like, how do I roll up a
big piece of paper with like han hour's worth of
paint on it? You know what I mean, without wrinkling it?
Call it Joe, who's on face off? He goes get this.
(55:14):
I worked at a warehouse where we had to hand
roll ancient silks, so I know the rolling technique, you
know what I mean. It's like, well, ship, I don't know.
It's great and there's people, you know what I mean.
I'll have sex with Joe if he knows how to
(55:41):
roll ancient silks. Fuck, like he knows how to roll
ancient silks like that, and and and that's like one
of those things like if you know how to do it,
like I will have sex with you. It's like when
someone can play piano and sing, like, I will have
sex with you. It's like one of the can roll silks,
like I will have sexually. I will have sex with you.
Do you have one of those things where it's like
if someone can do one thing, you'll suck them. Okay. Um.
(56:05):
The physicians assistant in my doctor's office is moving to Miami. Um.
And he is just this adorable, adorable guy and he's
gotten like really jacked in the pandemic. It's so weird.
But you know, he's like so sweet and like I'm
not like that like creepy with him. And I've never
I've never whatever I sound. He doesn't, he doesn't, He
(56:28):
has no idea he has, he has, he has, he
knows nothing about me, and but he it was it
was my last check up with him last week, and
he gave me like a quick little exam and just
like massaged my abdomen while I was lying down. I
was like see like you know medicine, you know how
to touch me like this is this, I'll have sex
with you. I would suck any doctor, yeah, or dentists
(56:51):
or dentist. No, they're sick, they're sick. Maybe I take
it back, Maybe I wouldn't suck any dentists. And I
am king shaming you. No, it's not even that. It's
not even about there. It's not even about it as
a kink. I'm just saying, like, you know, maybe not
any dentists, maybe not any dentists there. What are your
what are you what are your thinking? I think I'm
(57:11):
just gonna definitely so. No, No, I said doctor, Like
that's not the most fucking don't fucking ship. No, It's
like I'm watching old episodes of Housewives of Beverly Hills
and like Adrian Malouf's husband, Paul Maluke, I'm so horny
for him, and it's like only because he's a surgeon. Okay,
(57:31):
I'm rewatching one and two. Can I tell you this ship?
I'm doing it literally the same thing right now. Is
your reason sick and fucked up? What's your reason? You
can cut this? No? No, I want to get to
the window in which I want to see before Taylor's husband. Yes,
(58:00):
I want to see the in between, and I want
to see the post. I mean, look, there is a
morbid curiosity that is the fact that that we find
out everything about that stuff. And I will say now
watching seasons one and two again, I'm like almost at
the end of two two revelations one, I think Taylor
is the saddest person to ever be on reality television.
(58:21):
And I also think it's almost like a living document
of this is why I like Beverly Hills. It's because
it's sort of about the cracks in the China, you
know what I mean. And I really think it's an
interesting tension between them trying to have drama on TV
and then when this real thing creeps in, like the
entire franchise changes. Number two, I think justice for Camille Grammar,
(58:44):
Justice for Camille Grammar. Camille Grammar was ahead of her time.
And I think, and now we said it save Taylor
Armstrong's life and I'm not kidding, yeah yeah, And the
morally corrupt fayre The morally corrupt fayres Nick was a
moment in time. And also it's just I also love
l v P. I never thought I would and Kyle.
(59:05):
I'm seeing a very interesting shade to Kyle that I
never really remembered or new before, which is that she
used to be well in seasons one and two, she's like,
she's sort of showing a bitchier, more queen be like,
I'm like a funny, mean girl side than she ever
shows now because she's sort of she's like sweet and
(59:25):
hapless and like things happened to her. She's always crying.
There is like a harrowing scene which is Kim and
Kyle Richards ganging up on Brandy Glandville at a game night,
and it's so crazy to watch them do this, and
it's like, am I on Brandy's side right now? And
obviously Brandy goes completely chaotic evil and she corrupts him
(59:46):
and it becomes crazy. But you know, it was not
cut and dry, like Camille and Brandy are like the
evil like bitch goddesses of this franchise. Looking back, I'm like,
you know, Kyle and Kim like could give as much
as they got, are as good as they got. I
started rewatching one and two because I am noticing myself
(01:00:08):
mourning the world before mourning the loss of the world
before social media, when people were outrageous and didn't feel Okay,
this is gonna get me yeah totally. And time and
tech kills everything. Time and tech kills everything. Because Kyle
Richards now is it feels accountable to this audience, where
(01:00:34):
she didn't when she was like vehemently defending her sister
seasons one and two and like had little awareness of
the public or like how popular she would be on Instagram.
And now Kyle Richards is like basically nothing. Yeah, I
said it. I still stand Kyle and still do see
her when I look in the mirror. Um, but that's
(01:00:56):
my across the bear, your Renna. What are you talking about?
I'm Renna and entered into everyone else. But when I
look in the mirror, I see Kyle, and so does Lisa.
When Lisa looks in the Renna, she's When Lisa Wrena
looks in the mirror, she sees Kyle too. And that's
sort of important when you're Lisa Arenda, because if you
looked in the mirror and saw yourself as Lisa Arenna,
you wouldn't act like Lisa Arenna. But when you look
(01:01:16):
in the mirror and see Kyle Richards, you feel you.
There's like a lack of self awareness. And then you
go out and you're Renna. And I say this as
someone who loves Renna, and I love Renna, and everyone's
piste off at Renna and I go risk have some respect,
respect and respect. And I'll say this, Kyle can stick
(01:01:37):
around because she brought us Kathy Yea, and she can
stick around if we get a little bit of the
Mauriceo real estate fraud. Here's the deal, is there real
estate fraud? Yeah? Bitch where I'm I'm demented, I'm criminal. Same.
(01:02:00):
I just went on bitch Sessed last weekend. It was
the highlight of my entire life. Wait, Sarah, have you
always been Bravo Bravo head? I'm just addicted to the
Real Housewives of Beverly Hills, New York and Potomic and
I can't watch the other Bravo shows because I can't.
I don't care about the youth. Want the SMR experience,
(01:02:21):
a full face of makeup. I want the near the
grotesqueness of like these women are fast approaching physical and
a mental demise. But it's the cracks in the china
that you're saying, and you don't get that with, um,
(01:02:43):
what's it? I try getting into it, I'm like, I don't.
This is it's a little tragic because these are all
like you know, servers and like people who are like
are kind of struggling in some additional way to like
their personal problems. Totally, I could watch if it was
a lot of Lisa, but I do like you should watch.
(01:03:04):
You watch like you would love Salt Like sorry, I'm
so sorry. Of course I saw salt like I'm so sorry.
Of course, of course salt Lake is salt Lake is.
I would say those are like the core for and
I hate to leave Atlanta out of it, but Atlanta
is just too hit or miss. Like Atlanta, the good
seasons are truly unreal, like they're they're so fucking good.
(01:03:26):
But there's there's bad seasons that just like truly you
watch an entire year and nothing happens. And I know
that's controversial, but Potomac, Beverly Hills, and New York. If
I had to say my top five favorite housewives, I
think they would all come from those franchises. And then's
the controversial opinion, but I think that's because the top
like those are all camp cities and Atlanta can't be
(01:03:50):
camped because they're all so funny and so self aware
mostly mostly like they're just being like Candy is just
like cool, you know's what's up? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah yeah.
They're not Potomac. They kind of are. They know how
funny they are, they know what they're they're they're supposed
(01:04:14):
to do, and yet there's like such a grounded charm
to the fact that like they're just like, yeah, like, oh,
I'm moving out of the town house or I don't know,
like it's just like it's it's relatable. It's not like
a grotesque picture of like class bullshit. Then, like as
much as the other ones are, and I'm just like, oh,
I just like these women and I would hang out
(01:04:35):
with any of them. I've said this a million times.
But you're like Giselle like knows that she's being funny,
but she lives in the fucking woods in a house
it looks like a ship. She looks awful, and she
dresses horrible. Also, did you know that none of them really,
only like one and a half of them even live
in Potomac and they all live truly two hours away
(01:04:55):
from each other. Potomac is not like a real like place. No,
it's like a desert needed like location. It's never lands.
It's high Rule, but it's as rural culture. Number A
hundred and three Potomac. And Karen is giving rule Endorf.
(01:05:17):
She's giving gan Endorf in a major way beyond human.
She's She's I love her. She's in my top five,
She's in my All Stars cast. If I had to
put one together, I'd say her, Yes, I do stand Candice,
Rinna Kyle, and then I would say maybe lou or Son.
(01:05:37):
I don't know enough. I'm kind of still a dilatant
to house. I'm not going to put on my own ranking.
I'm gonna stain from them. You have to have stain,
you must have stained. I do have a question free
going because here I am. I'm going, I'm going on
lost culture. I gotta do my research. Okay, okay, And
I'm and I'm and I'm listening, but I'm laughing, mind you,
(01:05:58):
I hope genuinely the goal and and and bone goes,
Bone goes this. No, Ramona Bone knows no Ramona Rama.
And this is when I put in my card and
I pose, and I posed something. I'm gonna pose an
interesting hypothesis. You we think that the presence of Ramona
(01:06:19):
Singer continues the discourse on the show of how Glass
is Poison. That's interesting, that's you know what I mean,
because we're getting Leah, we're getting Ebony, we're getting cool
girls that are a little bit erasing the narrative that
(01:06:41):
I think Andy when he was sewing, when he was
the fabric and yeah, yeah, and he wants to tell
it no, and he wants to tell a story that
rich people can be really bad and we like to
watch their lives fall apart before our very eyes. Time.
I don't know where Andy's First of all, can I
(01:07:03):
just say something about all the fucking like the like
I think it was like the US Sun like flop,
You're not You're not even the British Sun, like you
have no power. And yet they still like I got
under my skins because they're reporting that I'm saying that
Andy Cohen himself banned me from watch What Happens Like Supremacies,
(01:07:24):
when all I said on the podcast with Cecily a
couple of weeks ago was I'm pretty sure I'm not
allowed back because I think that because they cut out
this thing where I said the Ramona's supremacist. I did
not personally make it about a thing where Andy Cohen
like doesn't like me. No, that's not even true. You're
being hyperbolic. I mean, yes, I I stand Andy Cohen
(01:07:48):
to the tops of mountains and back to the plains
and the valleys. That man is a genius on the
topic of remote and so I just want to clear
that up. And and and I love Andy so much
on the on the topic of Ramona. That is so interesting, Sarah,
I don't quite know how to answer that. But my
thing with Andy maybe or not Andy, but Bravo is like,
I don't know how much there I don't know what
(01:08:10):
the balance is between them wanting to protect some of
these women, like let's say Erica Jane, or how much
they want to like expose how these women are unraveling,
and how corrupt they are, and how wealth corrupts you
and how all these things are like noxious and poisonous
and corrosive. I don't know. I think I think I
think it's just holding up some sort of like or
(01:08:31):
shack tests and then we all interpret it for ourselves.
But as but with Ramona, it's like, I'm so sick
of it because we it's just kind of like a
more an uglier version of the same thing that's built
up over years. And I'm just like, I don't really
Now she gets on my TV and I get like,
I crawl under my skin and I'm like, actually anchor
and I want to like throw, I get violent and
(01:08:52):
it's scary. I'm not like that anyway. That's because I
think the reason why the ratings are so low is
not because of ebony. And then and it's insane. It's
insane for people to say that I think the ratings
are low because we we're it's becoming sort of Now
that you bring in these like cool, smart women that
are younger and they confront Ramona, it's actually stops the
(01:09:16):
dramatic narrative and you because because Ramona is a person
who cannot have that discussion because it's embarrassing and if
she were to actually say what she thinks, what she
refuses to do, she would come off as insensitive, racist,
classist at all. And so that's why she's refusing to
(01:09:36):
talk about it at the reunion, why the reunion keeps
getting pushed, it's why there like this season, the filming
for the next season is postponed, quote unquote indefinitely. It's
because we're actually at a turning point. Because when you
hire someone like Leah and Ebony and you throw them
into the cast and they, by nature of being who
they are, chiefly Ebony, like, we have to talk about
(01:09:59):
this because it's part of the fabric of who I am.
And if I'm going to be friends with these women
in a real way and have your show happen, I
have to make sure we're on the same page because
I won't be a part of someone who stands with
white supremacy. And you have someone who refuses to engage
in that conversation because they probably are consciously or unconsciously
aligned with white supremacy, then you don't have a show.
(01:10:20):
And the viewers aren't stupid, we can see that. So
if that's going to be the narratives that's playing out
and two people don't come to the table to have
conflict over that, and we can't have what you need
on that show with this conflict and resolution, then you
don't have a show. So you either stick with Ramona
and her cohorts or you move on. And that's actually
(01:10:42):
where unwittingly, I think the show has found itself because
you are not going to gain viewers with this current cast.
You have to make a choice because Ramona is not
playing ball, and if a cast member is not playing ball,
then probably they should be the ones to go. Because
I do believe we can have a fun show with
Ebony and Leah and even Sonia and Lou. But because
I believe that Sonya and Lou will come to the
(01:11:04):
table and have the conversation, you know what I mean,
Like lu showed up at the election party. We don't
know her voting history, you know what I mean, Like,
I'm sure it's checkered, but she's coming to the table
to have the conversations. She's willing to engage. Ramona is not.
And I think there's an interesting parallel. Dare I do
Dare I do this? With great and Nary? Nary with
(01:11:29):
grapes not like grapes. Stopping Lady is fun to watch.
Oh my god, I love this. There is something really
hard to watch about Ramona this season, being so violently
racist that it's like I can enjoy watching Taylor Armstrong's
life fall apart, fall from the bone like a good
(01:11:51):
brisket right out of the pot. But there's young and young,
but it's like it's not fun. Like watching Ramote of
this season is like, okay, we got to see the
grape stopping lady get hurt, and this is like watching
her go to the hospital and get reconstructive lung surgery
and like you know what I mean, It's like, and
(01:12:12):
that's the Queen. Thank you for the complex. Sorry, oh
that's my And that's my because you've got me. I
agree now because I go back, because I'm revisiting old seasons.
I go back to you know, um Lunn finding out
that Tom cheated and they had the picture and and
(01:12:35):
I'm going to add this to the list of things
that made me laugh harder in my entire life. I
don't know if anyone remembers this finey little moment. Luanna
is shown the evidence three Lucy and the evidence. Bethany
shows the photo to Ramona of Tom making out sucking
face at the Regent or wherever Thentown other region down
(01:13:01):
l a wonderful photo of Tom sucking face at the
lyric hiper In and like they're like, oh, really, should
we tellou? And should we tell aun? Luan Bethany and
she's a picture and Ramona goes she's a body, scream,
(01:13:23):
runs out of the room, goes to the bathroom and
looks at herself. Yeah yeah, I mean she's certainly done
iconic things like here's the thing, Like, you can't say
that Ramona hasn't given television just now. It's not tenable
because she's unwilling to complete what would you have to do do,
(01:13:47):
which is conflict resolution on that show. I think they
all are told that the show is about conflict and
then resolution, and the conflict can get very intense, but
we'll work towards an intense resolution. And that's not going
to happen if she won't fucking sit at the reunion
because she's scared to be called a racist, Like it's
like crazy, Yeah, it's like there has to be the
crazy person of the straight person in anything. It's like,
(01:14:11):
you look like a Nazi's wife, you have to say
you're not. And so Ramona looks like the Nazis wife
and votes like a Nazis wife. So we have to
deal with that because now we have people on the
cast who aren't darn't wucking with it. Fully in agreement.
Now I'm full agreement. I totally agree. Can't there's no
(01:14:31):
forward motion with her. Well, this is this is always
what happens on House, but it's like a more recent
example is like or not a more recent example, but
like a recent example is Monique and Candace, and it's
like there's no resolution there because there's just no resolution
in there there and so then Moniqu ends up leaving.
It's like, there there has to be some developmental cycle
(01:14:55):
that happens with these fights, and when when there isn't that,
then like some things gotta get Yeah. Um, I just
I love that this has become sort of a Bravo
podcast and well, okay, I just want to say that
it's it's only because we are I think we're in
a golden age. And I also think I was gonna
say that we are wearing a great time for Bravo.
Sorry sorry, sorry, No, we we literally are. And I
(01:15:16):
also think it is interesting culturally what's happening on that
particular franchise to me, because it's like when the ratings
go down and people talk about the reasons why it's
getting to be the mainstream narrative for the quote unquote
reason why is fucked up to me again worth examining
because it's insane to put that responsibility on the black
(01:15:38):
woman's shoulders when all she's saying is I will not
align with white supremacy, and that's fucked up. And don't
tell me like, well, you know, the Bravo audience actually
doesn't want to see hard topics. They want to see
shoes when the back of the whole franchise is built
on tailor fucking armstrong. So you tell me that we
don't want to see dark shit. We've with alcoholism, suicide, death,
(01:16:04):
like we've dealt with some dark shit on these franchises.
In fact, that darkness that exists right under the wealth
is what people like about it. Yes they like the vacations.
Yes they like to see them get silly and stupid,
and we like to see the fights. But don't say
it's not about we don't want to see tough stuff
or have hard conversations, because that's not it. Literally, Yeah,
(01:16:27):
people are blaming Ebony. Yeah, the the rakes are weighed down,
and people are saying it's because Ebony keeps being preachy
and teachy about race and is stopping the fun, which
is like silly. So with this cultural discussion, we sort
(01:16:51):
of transition into I don't think so, honey, which bone?
What would you say about it? If you had to
say something about it? I don't think so, honey, is
our or allotted time to really individually go off on
something in culture and Sarah has done it before. Sarah's
thrived in the space. You and I have done an
(01:17:11):
okay job from time to time. You've you've had a
recent string of hits. I will say, I feel like
I'm I'm in a renaissance of mine. I don't think so.
I love it. I love it. I'm very happy for you.
I hope today is no exception. I think this is
a gorgeous be part harmony. I'm the low frequency when
Matt is like really like finding like the mid and
(01:17:32):
the and the high and the trouble, and then Sarah
is just is going to be the lead VOCs falsetto
And I'm worried and I'm worried going into this part.
Don't worry, don't don't worry. You've done it before. Okay, Matt, first,
I'm ready, I can go first. This is Matt Rodgers.
I don't think so many as time starts now, I
don't think so, honey. The ass eating on white Lotus.
(01:17:54):
So let me just say, as a disclaimer, this is
my favorite show of the moment, but that's not how
you eat ask babe. And I know Murray Bartlett knows
how to eat ass, and I know Lucas Gauge knows
how to get his ass eight, So why is he
standing up straight like a board like if? If we're
gonna do ass eating on White Lotus, we need some
back arched. Okay, Mike White, I know you're in a
(01:18:16):
relationship with a man, so you've been there, You've done that.
We're gonna need to see nose in hole and don't
tell me it can't be done because girls did it.
I hate to say girls did it on HBO when
we saw a nose fully going into Allison Williams is ass.
So we've seen it done. I love that we're depicting
ass eating. I love dramatically what this means for the
(01:18:38):
show going forward. But if we're gonna do it, let's
do it. Let's not nibble the top of an ass.
I don't think he was working his way down. I
don't think so, honey. I think we've got skittish on
the staging and we're gonna need to see better, do better.
I don't think so, honey, And that's one minute. I
love that love that we saw Lucas Gauge's ass. Love
love that we sort of get that love seeing Murray
(01:19:00):
Bartlett nude. These are gorgeous men. But if we're gonna
do it, let's do it. Okay, if we're gonna do it,
let's do it. Representation matters. And if we allow this
ass eating to happen, what's gonna happen with the kids
that watch White Lotus. They're not gonna know how to
eat ass. We need proper ass eating representation on our screens.
(01:19:21):
It's important. It's important. They're not going to know where
else to find acid eating, exemplary acid eating. Like what
are they going to have to watch girls to see
how to eat ass? It's like, no, they should be
able to be They should see these two gay men
on White Lotus with give me ass eating, and I
know these men know how to get their asses eight
and eat as. I don't think you should assume that
(01:19:44):
Murray Lucas or Mike White and his partner do it. Well, Well,
that's what It doesn't matter what you what do you think?
It's I'm not one of these people. I'm just saying
some gay men don't I know, I guess I know
a few gay men who just don't do it. Well,
then well, then if you're gonna do it, if you're
gonna depicted in film and television, you should do research
and there should be someone on set who's done it before,
(01:20:05):
like a doctor is on set for surgery scenes, and
they should say, actually, this is how you do it, gentlemen,
and you fucking you make it. And there was other
ways to stage that so that we could have gotten
a more realistic ass eating How did you watch this, Sarah? Yes?
And then I go maybe the wait, what's his name,
Lucas Gauge, Yes, Lucas Gage. Maybe. Lucas Gauge's character motivation
(01:20:29):
was like, I'm standing up straight, I'm scared, I'm scared,
I'm nervous. He didn't look scared to me. And then
you're just taking a lot of drugs spoiler alert. So meanwhile,
if I'm never taking drugs, if I'm ever going to
get my essays sober, I'm I'm sucking hold up to
the sky bent, get bent. Meanwhile, if you're on all
those pills and all those drugs. You're again be in
(01:20:50):
position mama daddy a coin. He straight up like a
board and I was like, and we cut to Murray
Burland and he's like nibbling the top of the butt.
I'm like, that just tickles m Honey, Honey, Mama Daddy
(01:21:10):
love the show, can't. I don't think I love the show. Can't.
We haven't talked about it a lot. Maybe we'll talk
about it more when it wraps up and we have.
We're actually having a guest on in a couple of months.
That's a part of the show. Very exciting little but um,
I love the show. Um. Just when this happened at
the end, I was like, girl, come on now with
(01:21:31):
this ass eating I don't know about all that. And
I had to say, I don't think so, honey, because
I'm out here for the kids. So now we moved to,
uh my phone died, so maybe this is Bowen Yang's
on the fly. I don't think so all right, and
(01:21:52):
its time starts now, I don't think so, honey. To
baby making do a leap. I have to post a
fucking apology on Instagram and saying this is not the
person I recognized. I'm actually pretty positive to do a
leap a spot of the homophobia from a mile away,
but was like, I'm gonna throw this guy a bone.
The baby like had like a five. The baby is
(01:22:13):
actually so gay, it's crazy. His whole identity, his whole
first album was like, I'm a pop star. Like his
whole of the motif in that album was I'm a
pop star. I'm a pop star. You are not obsessed
with the terminology of star if you're not a faggot,
as Matt Damon says, okay, so like I don't think so, honey,
Like all this homophobia creeping back up in the ground
(01:22:36):
swell in a way that is so like old and like,
I don't it's not even interesting. Homophobia makes the homophobia interesting.
And the baby making poor Sweet Duo while she's on
a yacht somewhere half to post that apology or having
a publicist post the apology. I don't know who. I'm
sure Duo wrote it herself, is just awful. I hate
(01:22:57):
that he put her through that. And that's one minute.
The baby is definitely done. I I was watching the
Instagram story and I I literally like, it's that thing.
It's that Matt Damon thing. Of like just stop talking,
because he started talking and he was like, I had
I have so many gay fans, and I love my
gay fans. He could have just shut up right there,
but he had to keep talking. And then he said
(01:23:18):
that insane thing about people. He said, I have lots
of gay fans. I have straight fans, gay fans. It's
just that my gay fans don't have AIDS. Are not
filthy and aren't aren't like discussing some like he he
basically like, isn't aware that just because you have AIDS
doesn't mean you're like a disgusting don't It's not even
(01:23:42):
worth really talking. It's really he he's obviously ignorant about
what it means to be living with HIV and AIDS.
Like he clearly did need some education on that, but
it was so beyond and that's so needed to happen
behind the scenes, because what he ended up saying to
his like nearly twenty million fans was like this truly
(01:24:04):
crazy misinformation that was so cruel and so homophobic and
so ugly and dark that it was like, WHOA, this
person really doesn't get to the point where then do
what did have to make a statement because it's like,
I mean, you have to talk about this. Yeah, right,
that doesn't get it right now? No, not at all anyway. Um,
(01:24:29):
I think it's type of Sarah sportms. I don't think so. Okay,
here's the thing, here's the thing. So I have to
baking in the oven. Okay. One freshets of the moment okay,
and anomber one if that a left field, and it
would seem a little dusty, but I think I could
(01:24:49):
dust it off and make it brand new. I'm what
I'm hearing is that you want to dust off the
dust to one. It's a new revelation. I want to
defend it before I before I go off. Okay, I'm
gonna defend it. It's gonna see it's a new revelation
and it's gonna seem irrelevant, but when you really think
about it, it's going to be more relevant than Oh
(01:25:10):
this is my favorite. Oh I love this. I think
I think that that seems to be the one that
the energy is around. Okay, this is Sarah squirms. I
don't think so, honey. She's dusting off her mets, her
dusting mets. Her time starts now. I don't think so. Honey,
people who think that Donald Jason her it is bad.
(01:25:37):
I think it's a cool style. Like he went out
of sitting, out of mind as you should be. Can
you seeing him pop up on the internet. Well, I'm
looking at I'm going it's this cool style. It's a
cool shape. All you have to separate they are from
(01:25:59):
the artist. First we had Rachel Don't the hairstyle not
that funny. Grace Jones invented a haircut that was a
million years ago, and that did a hairstyle that was
(01:26:20):
a million years ago. Donald Jason, Well that's a brand
nine seconds. That's defense from Donald Trump's hairstyle as and
I don't think so, honey. The first new hairsty since
Grace is Jones. He's you're saying, Donald Jason Trump, which
(01:26:42):
I don't think is right, is as brand new as
Grace Jones. That he's a style like probably he was
so out of sight, out of mind, you know him
with the new This makes this makes so much sense.
Act like no, I let let me say something. Aesthetics
(01:27:03):
are so important and the whole reason why a lot
of a lot of trump Ship took off was because
the aesthetic was not good. But it was strong and
full understood it, and everyone should watch the ContraPoints video
where she where you know, um nat only one talks
about aesthetics is in terms of she talks about them
(01:27:24):
in terms of gender, but also in terms of like fascism,
but like aesthetics rule everything, and like that's why it's
like it's okay for people to be shallow a little
bit when it comes to like the way they look,
because you are taken seriously, if you're visually compelling whatever, Okay, anyway,
it really looks big and strong because his hair is golden.
If I'm if I'm someone who's never what like, I'm
(01:27:45):
sure that Sarah, there's someone out there who's like, I
like his hair cut, the cut of his jib and
the cut of his hair, and I like his hair.
I like I like how it's a blade out and
I love it. And it's a strong aesthetic. It's distinct
and already that's that's that's a huge victory for the
person that is, you know, holding that style. I mean,
(01:28:07):
because you're asking questions about them, and if you know,
you that bitch when you cause all this conversation. Unfortunately,
my say that who said that Fyance s said that
by the way, Tina Knowles is going to be on
drag Race this week judging the snatch game. Well, the
season has made little sense, so I say why not?
I say it's a pyle on. Can we say something?
(01:28:28):
Can we say something? We love drag Race, we love,
we love everyone involved in the show. Jan did the
same exact thing on that show that Rose did, and
somehow Rose made it all the way to the top four,
which we love. But for Janny by psychologically abused in
the way she was makes no sense to me. Where
they're like, there's no soul there. What are you talking about?
We should have Jan on next week to to give
(01:28:50):
a tell all. I would love to have Joan on
to talk to Jan. We love Jan, We stand Jan
in this house, Sarah, do you watch raising her hand?
Syr Syrtical, theyr Nical. I put in a request, Yes,
you know who I want to be hearing on this podcast,
the Misham you show the culture ristas that might be
(01:29:15):
interesting in topical talk about topical Iman now that's a
flex in August point, that's a flex, right, But the
Tamisha Human drama, we will, we will, that's not over
there's anymore. She should be back. She even didn't she
leave being like I'll see you want all stars? Like
didn't she? Or that was Tina, But I think Tamisha
(01:29:38):
should come back to Misha is a very compelling character
in that in that world, and of course we'll see
more of her. It's not over. And yes, Sarah, we
will do our best to get to Misham. On the podcast,
She's coming through you. Wow, I'm sitting here and I'm like,
sort of love this. This was this was a is
(01:30:00):
an episode and what I loved about it that we
got to touch on the Wizard of Us, which do
you know? So so I don't know if you know this, Sarah,
but right now we're doing we're we're sort of gearing
up for the Cultural Awards, and so all the readers
are campaigning for UM all the cultural awards, and one
of the cultural awards is UM Worst Insult towards Us.
(01:30:21):
And one time on the podcast, on the podcast reviews,
someone said, these what these gays are so basic, they
don't know anything. They just talked about the same stupid ship.
And I bet neither of them have ever even seen
the Wizard of Oz, which is the while which is
one of the weirdest, craziest things anyone's ever said, and
(01:30:41):
it is a front runner for worst insult towards us.
It's so weird to say someone, I bet you haven't
even seen The Wizard of Oz. I think it was
supposed to drag us for our cultural literacy like that
we know where it's like, Oh, it's so fundamental, it's
such a fundamental text. But I'm like, babe, of course
we've seen it. We've seen the Wizard of Oz. I mean,
(01:31:03):
you guys, can't be too literal. Get on here. I mean, hello,
I talked about Wizard of Oz. What am I six?
You know what I mean? But you know what, though,
I will say that the power of that film, and
also I will say this, Judy Garland is so effortless,
like what a fucking like performance that is just so good.
(01:31:25):
And the whole like you talk about Judy, Judy, Judy,
and but the whole cast is amazing. Margaret Hamilton's slaying
like the Lollipop guilds down the fun Where about that?
I'm shaking my fucking ass at the club. Two three
(01:31:46):
drinks follow the Yellow Brick Road. Mama, I'm a whole up,
Lucas Gauge. You could never We always been holding a
brush entire time. It's powerful. This is my little dusting
brush for my keyboard. When there was like little crumbs
and chip in that and oh, I thought it was
(01:32:10):
it's his. Well, he's gonna do that thing like they
do on the Dragons tutorials, which is he's gonna go
to this well. It makes me laugh every time, Sarah Swarm,
what the fun? This was so much fun? This was
so can I even say I had so much fun
that I got swept away sweating profusely. Didn't even say
(01:32:34):
the culture I was going to say, because I was
literally so in the moment, say the house wizard. Now
you said, you're say it, Edward scissor hands. Oh quickly, quickly,
you have five minutes. Okay, I think so, honey, My
(01:32:59):
thought and starts four minutes fifty nine seconds. There's a
lot we can hold Tim Burton responsible for buttons and stitches,
aesthetic culture, Core, line Core, Frank and Wyney. There's a
lot we can be added Tim Burton box strolls as
stitches for mouth button ries. But what did he give
(01:33:23):
us here? Hi Gothic Horror romance, that was a fashion movie,
that was a horror movie. That was a movie about isolation,
and that was a movie about s e X. Yeah,
and it was also a Diane Waste vehicle, Diane we
selling a von door to door. Mm hmm. That's a
(01:33:46):
huge movie. Iconic Winona, iconic Winona. And unfortunately, like Johnny
Depp delivered, we got to separate the hair from the
from the trump. We gotta separate the art from the artists. Okay,
I think though it's controversial, weather or not, Johnny Depp
is controversial. I think that it kind of came out
that maybe that situation was not all it seemed to be.
Then I take it back. But but you know what,
(01:34:07):
that's part of the cultural conversation. And thank you Sarah
for bringing us to this point. Thank you for touching
on Edward saysor Hen's in this way. Where can people
find you and what do you want them to watch?
I'm going to find me at at Sara Square. And
when we go to at Sera Squam, they're going to
find a link. Okay, it's gonna take them to a
website that they've probably never been to before. What that
(01:34:27):
website means that TV and as Bowen so perfectly put
it before, it's a worker room social cooperative website. I'm
rock hard, rock hard, and you know what, it's hard
to get people to go to a website they've never
heard of to watch a thirteen minute video. It's a
great side. I love the SA is amazing, watched Sara
(01:34:51):
Vaccine Amy CD And I'm not all my shows because
guess what, I'm looking at the ticket sales. They are
not flying like hotcakes. I bet after this they fly
like hotcakes. They're gon and shout out. Guess what. My
little cousin loves this podcast. This is This is like
(01:35:11):
the millionth time I've heard of a little cousin liking
how old at least? Okay, so I heard of like
a fifteen year old little cousin listens to this. I'm like,
that's fascinating. Careful now, careful, now, careful. I hope they
like my I don't think so, honey about eating ass
is the sweet spot perfect Sarah's squirm and you gotta
(01:35:34):
follow hell Trap Nightmare. What what a huge, huge, huge,
huge force. We love them, Chicago, U Sarah, We love Yeah.
This is fucking this was a blast. We were in Holland.
We were hooping in Hollerand, And we do end every
episode with a song, but none more classic than the
(01:35:56):
one we're about to sing right now. So oh Therain
ball dear Land. I've never sung solo in my life.
(01:36:21):
Hello Blah, one of the most beautiful songs of all times.
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