Enneagram and Marriage
The Enneagram and Marriage Podcast, hosted by Christa Hardin, MA, is rooted in two decades of experience counseling and coaching couples. On top of her expert marriage advice, Christa uses the Enneagram to add another layer of understanding in how we work as individuals and gives us deeper insight into how we connect and shine together in marriage and relationships across the collective community.
Episodes
Have you noticed humans learn better through story, metaphor, and the five senses than through thinking alone? Discover the fun of personality growth through the extraordinary lens of personality patterns we see mirrored in nature this late summer with Dr. Angela Rosenberg, Type 2, author of her book "Being on the Wing: Feathered Reflections on the Enneagram Subtypes." Whether we are lively and animated or more calculated and aff...
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July 30, 2025 • 22 mins
Discover your intimate superpower through sexual integration! In this finale episode, marriage coach Christa reveals what healthy sexual expression looks like for each Enneagram type - from Type 1's relaxed presence finding perfection in imperfect moments to Type 8's gentle strength and vulnerable power. Learn how sexual integration isn't about becoming someone else but accessing your most authentic self in intimate connection. Exp...
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July 28, 2025 • 21 mins
Navigate sexual challenges with compassion through understanding Enneagram shadows in intimacy! Marriage coach Christa explores how each type's protective patterns create predictable conflicts - from Type 1 perfectionism blocking pleasure to Type 8 intensity overwhelming partners to Type 9s disconnecting during intimate moments. Discover common type conflicts like structure vs. spontaneity (1 vs. 7), emotional connection vs. space ...
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July 23, 2025 • 18 mins
Discover the secret pleasure languages that could revolutionize your intimate connection! In this episode of the summer sizzle series, marriage coach Christa reveals how each Enneagram type has a unique way of experiencing and expressing physical pleasure - from visual connection (Types 1,4,7) to touch-centered intimacy (Types 8,9,2) to auditory appreciation (Types 3,6,5). Learn why Type 8s need powerful intensity, how Type 5s expe...
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July 21, 2025 • 25 mins
Understanding how your partner receives intimate invitations is just as important as how they initiate them! Discover why response styles have everything to do with personality as you learn about the gentle approach types, those who need beautiful and unhurried environments, and those who just need to know you see them in their joyful enthusiasm. We also talk about the art of saying "no" well, too, and coming back together again a...
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July 20, 2025 • 16 mins
Discover why you and your partner seem to have completely different experiences during intimacy! In this revelatory episode, Christa explores how your Enneagram type determines whether you connect sexually through your body (Gut Types 8, 9, 1), emotions (Heart Types 2, 3, 4), or mind (Head Types 5, 6, 7). Through real couple stories like Sarah & Mike's breakthrough from "mismatched libidos" to deep connection, you'll understand why...
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July 13, 2025 • 17 mins
Discover the secret language of sexual initiation in marriage through the Enneagram! In this groundbreaking episode, marriage coach Christa explores how each of the nine personality types initiates intimacy in completely different ways - and why misreading these signals creates disconnection in the bedroom. Learn about the three distinct initiation styles: Direct Initiators (Types 8, 3, 7) who pursue with confidence and clarity, Su...
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July 8, 2025 • 21 mins
What if the secret to a happy marriage isn't finding the right person, but creating the right conditions for joy to flourish together? In this uplifting episode, discover why happiness in marriage is less about constant bliss and more about intentional practices that build lasting joy. Learn the difference between fleeting pleasure and sustainable happiness, explore the five pillars of marital joy (shared gratitude, playful connect...
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Tired of the mental exhaustion that comes from constantly wondering what others think of you? In this episode, bestselling author and pastor Sharon Hodde Miller, Enneagram 7 (7-3 pairing) reveals why examining our life without just gazing inward, but also up at God and outwardly to others can also help us to break free from the self-focused scripts that keep us trapped in insecurity. Although some Enneagram patterns fuel self-preoc...
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July 1, 2025 • 15 mins
Sometimes the most powerful chains in marriage are the ones we can't see. In this transformative episode, discover how to identify and break free from the four invisible patterns that keep couples stuck: the Scorekeeper Chain (mental tallies and resentment), the Mind-Reading Chain (expecting partners to anticipate needs), the Perfection Chain (redoing your partner's efforts), or any past-pattern fun/blindly following family-of-orig...
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June 30, 2025 • 41 mins
What can hobbits, elves, and the wisdom of Middle-earth teach us about relationships? In this special conversation, Christa sits down with Philip Nation, publisher at Thomas Nelson and lifelong Tolkien enthusiast, to explore the profound relationship wisdom hidden within J.R.R. Tolkien's beloved stories.
From the faithful friendship of Sam and Frodo to Tolkien's own enduring relationships with family and friends, this episode unco...
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June 25, 2025 • 14 mins
Here in this E + M mini, Christa explores the concepts of masculinity and femininity, as well as the tendency of certain types to lean toward different qualities, and how understanding this can transform your marriage dynamics. Learn which qualities come naturally to your type, which ones you might need to develop, and how accessing both strength and tenderness both offers us more resilient, balanced partnerships. Whether you're a ...
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Join Christa for a crucial conversation with Rachel Clinton Chen, MDiv and faculty at The Allender Center, about spiritual abuse and its unique impact on marriages. Rachel brings both professional expertise and Type 2 heart-centered wisdom to this difficult but necessary topic.
Discover how spiritual abuse differs from general church hurt, the specific challenges it creates for couples when one spouse's faith is shaken while the o...
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Join us for an inspiring conversation with filmmakers Nathan (Type 4) and D'Lytha (Type 5) Myers as they share their unique journey of marriage, parenting, and creating meaningful entertainment together. Nathan, known for his work on The Chosen and now running Grafted Studios, brings passionate creativity, while D'Lytha offers thoughtful wisdom. Together, they've created the award-winning film "Aria Appleton Shines," which tackles ...
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June 16, 2025 • 44 mins
What does it mean to bring light to the darkest seasons of life and faith? In this deeply moving post-Father’s Day episode, Mike Donehey, lead singer of the reunited Tenth Avenue North, shares the heart behind their new album “Learning to Trust.” As a social Type 4 married to a Type 2, Mike demonstrates the courage to go to those dark feelings, sit with them, and grapple with them honestly—both in his music and his marriage. The al...
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June 11, 2025 • 14 mins
When emotions run high in relationships, knowing how to self-soothe can make the difference between connection and disconnection. In this practical mini-episode, we explore a few way each instinctual variant, Self-Preservation, Social, and Sexual/One-to-One, approaches calming when feelings are intense. We also break down a bit further to designate heart types of each instinctual variant needing emotional safety, head types seeking...
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What if the key to a stronger marriage isn't avoiding conflict, but learning to dig in and work through difficult moments? In this practical episode, marriage therapist and relational life therapist Zach Brittle, 8 brings over a decade of professional wisdom combined with personal insights from his Type 8-Type 2 marriage. Host of the popular Marriage Therapy Radio Podcast, Zach shares his gifted perspective on the stories that ofte...
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June 4, 2025 • 54 mins
What does it mean to age with strength and wisdom? In this powerful episode, Kathleen Henderson, 8 (8-9 pairing) shares her honest journey and OR nursing background to help others through health challenges, empowering you to use your voice and your spouse through the seasons through health challenges and through the evolution of marriage in later seasons of life. As a Type 8 married to a Type 9 with adult children, Kathleen opens u...
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June 2, 2025 • 54 mins
As we step into a summer of refinement here at Enneagram and Marriage, what better time to focus on creating homes that truly work for our families? In this insightful episode, interior design and home organization expert and author Whitney English, Type 4 (4-9 pairing) shares her room-by-room approach to creating spaces that are both beautiful and functional. Whitney believes that anyone can live a beautiful life, that "if you're ...
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May 28, 2025 • 28 mins
Is artificial intelligence becoming the third party in your marriage? In this timely episode, we explore the growing trend of couples turning to AI for relationship advice, planning, and emotional processing. Based on survey data from real couples, Christa unpacks three major benefits AI brings to marriage—from vacation planning to communication tools—and three significant concerns about emotional bypassing, digital intimacy, and f...
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