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March 6, 2025 42 mins

Come get juiced up with the gang as we conclude the Master Eight section of our bracket. David Lynch (RIP) craziness vs absolutely bat-shit "vampire" antics make for a really fun end to the section. Don your snakeskin jacket and pop in your cheap teeth...this is Cage Match.

Intro music by: Bill Panks

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Transcript

Episode Transcript

Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:00):
Oh, God.

(00:05):
Oh, my God.
Speaking of hot and fresh,
I kind of half expected you to show up with like a bag of chicken.

(00:26):
Yeah, kind of sad.
Oh, no, I had shepherd's pie for dinner.
Oh, nice.
Yeah, I went to Costco today, so it was a very low effort.
Still sounds good. Yeah.
Oh, man, I feel like
kind of melancholy about this episode for some reason.
I think because we're you know, it's episode 29 of season two.

(00:47):
And there are only 31 episodes.
So we're almost there.
And we never have to speak to each other again.
Yeah. I mean, that part rules.
But I'm also kind of sad about it.
After 31 episodes, we get to speak to each other.
We don't have to.
That's true. We can opt in or out.
I don't know.
He's still got so many movies we haven't touched,

(01:09):
and he's going to make so many more.
Plus, you know, G Force to G Force three.
Three force because, you know, the mole is going to be a recurring character
and all of course, absolutely.
Well, Speckles didn't like die.
He didn't throw him in a fucking volcano.
He was serving time.
What was he doing at the end?
Was he making license plates?

(01:30):
Did they all say nodes?
Nudes.
This is a bit of a cram session for me this time.
I just got back from a trip and had to speed run the two movies
last night and tonight and literally fast forwarded some of it.
Yeah, as is my

(01:51):
general design.
I got to say the oh, man, the club scene at the end of Vampire's Kiss,
like the last like 20 minutes of it, that music sped up.
I went back and I listened to it slow because I was like,
what does this even sound like?
And I realized that I think three out of four times that I've watched this movie,
I've watched it at at least one and a half speed.
Yeah, I can't imagine.

(02:12):
I can't imagine either of these movies. Benny Hilde.
Oh, they're pretty good.
It just seems like such an insane way to like experience either of these films.
Welcome to my brain, John.
Yeah, I'm glad I don't have kids.
I can watch movies at normal, normal speed, normal volume.
Yeah. Yeah.
Normal boobs just out and about both films.
Good boobs.
At one point, I can't remember which one it was.

(02:34):
I think it was leaving Las Vegas.
Cora like looked over my shoulder at the computer and she was like,
I want to see Dancing Nipples again.
Yeah, the other day when she was just staring at me and saying, boobies, boobies.
Boobies, boobies, boobies, boobies.
Like, what the fuck is happening here?
There are some great things about having kids.

(02:59):
Man, we went to Thunderdome today and it was fucking wild.
It's the craziest.
I've seen it in there.
Kids were just crawling on the kegs and like falling all over the place.
Like Barry got kicked in the head at one point, but was like, whatever.
I'll still never get over the time that
Matt's kid got bit in the middle of the back.

(03:21):
Just like, how do you bite a child in the middle of the back
and leave like teeth and friends?
That's a good bite.
That's a flat surface.
Somebody with a little mouth.
I had a kid bite me on the arm once at a Chuck E.
Cheese. Yeah.
How old were you?
To.
I was an appropriated.
To be a Chuck E. Cheese. I will answer no further questions.

(03:43):
Fair enough.
I don't think there's an inappropriate age to be at a Chuck E.
Cheese. I took my high school prom date.
The Chuck E. Cheese still exist.
Yeah, it still exists.
They went out of business for a little bit.
I think they had a bankruptcy issue and then somebody bought them up again
and relaunched it because then Chuck E. Cheese was like, cool.
Chuck E. Cheese. Oh, yeah.

(04:03):
And now he's like backwards hat, like skateboard Chuck E. Cheese.
Yeah, he's like what people thought cool was supposed to be in 1996.
Yeah, I'm glad they're staying behind the curve.
Yeah, I mean, at this point, 1996 is probably fucking cool again.
So maybe they're ahead.
Well, what was what was big in 1996?
Don't don't Google it. I'm going to Google it.
You you guess.

(04:24):
Um, but E.R. was a cool show still.
Probably. Yeah, you are was probably hot.
I want you to try and finish this thought that Google has given me in 1996.
Popular culture included.
Gargoyles.
Oh, probably.
Might be.

(04:45):
According to Google, I in 1996, popular culture included movies,
music, TV shows and news stories.
Really? Wow.
God, I is fucking so smart.
The English patient was big.
Lame. The Macarena.
That was that was a big one.
Fuck, yeah. OK.
Uh, hey, E.R. E.R. was definitely still big.

(05:08):
Yes, you nailed it.
E.R. was dominant for a long time in the 90s, though.
Seinfeld Friends and Suddenly Susan.
I forgot about that one.
What the fuck was Suddenly Susan?
The name sounds familiar.
It's just a show about Susan Sarandon.
Oh, oh, Beanie Babies.
Beanie Babies were a thing.
OK. Past guest Brian Kim McCormick
sold Beanie Babies for like big time profit for a while.

(05:31):
I vaguely remember him talking about that.
Yeah.
The average price of gas was a dollar twenty three a gallon.
What a rip off.
I know my my dad still would have driven many miles to go get the dollar 21.
Slang words of choice included Booyah Word, Psych and Fly.
Fuck, yeah.

(05:53):
Psych.
Yeah, I feel like that was a turning point in terms of like
paying attention to what the news was saying about dumb fucking social shit.
And then we got like the Internet and it just became that forever faster.
Oh, we saw Bill Clinton as president.
Mm hmm. That was one.

(06:13):
Yeah. When did the Monica Lewinsky thing?
This was pre-beige, pre-beging.
Or at least pre-perjury.
Also in 1996, the movie The Rock came out.
That's right. This is a Nicolas Cage podcast.
Boom. Bring it home, Sean.
Welcome back to Cage, Matt Colen, around about way of meeting Nicolas Cage.
I'm your host, Sean, here with my co-host Nick.

(06:37):
Sorry.
I'm Nick.
I finally get it. I finally get it.
You fuck it up.
God damn it.
We'll fix it in post.
I've got him saying Nick so many times.
And I'm just I'm Jack.
God damn it.
And our producer, Peter. Hello.
And this is Cage, Matt.

(06:59):
I said that we're almost done with this thing.
I can I can finally I can soon stop pretending like I care.
I think everyone knows.
Yeah, we're going on three solid years of this.
It's a lot of time spent with Nicolas Cage.
Yeah. Yeah.
I feel like I really know the man at this point, which is kind of crazy.

(07:19):
Is that Stockholm syndrome?
Kind of.
I was I was here from I was here from the word Jiu Jitsu.
I was in. I was.
Episode one.
Oh, God, you did.
That was, you know, as a as a exercise in this process,
I really felt like we made a bad choice.

(07:44):
I don't think I can do this.
And then episode two army of one.
And then it all came together.
Yeah. And then we all came together.
Yeah. In Hayden's room.
The only time that's ever happened.
Well, what are you guys drawn to right now between the two movies?

(08:05):
Let's get on with.
Well, I just watched a wild at heart this morning, so
take it off. All right.
I am always just like
thrilled with how this movie opens
with just the fire and then the title
like slamming into place like with airplane noises as it comes in, like

(08:27):
as if this was going to be one of the big action films.
It kills me.
And then you just get like that intro with like
I think it's like some rock and roll and no.
And I'm still talking about the fire credits.
Yeah.
It'll just the fire over everything.
It sets a tone for the film for sure.

(08:48):
It does.
Yeah. I love the David Lynch enos of it all.
Every just like weird.
Pause or motion like sometimes somebody just walks kind of funny.
And I'm like, that's so David Lynch.
I think that's my big thing with this movie is that like,
I don't think I like David Lynch.
So everyone's well.
Very fair opinion.

(09:10):
I mean, I watch these and I'm just like,
I think he would be better for me in like a long, slow procedural
like Twin Peaks if I really gave it another go.
I think I would really enjoy it more.
And we talked about it with Tank a little bit to where it's like,
I really feel like I want more backstory and I know like
who gives a shit about Mr.
Reindeer, whatever. It doesn't matter.
But like all these characters, all this random shit

(09:31):
that comes up in a David Lynch movie, like the fast talking guy
talking about pigeons spreading diseases.
Like, what the fuck is that about?
Doesn't matter. David Lynch.
Yeah, it's just the world you're in now.
But in like a 90 whatever it is, 100 minute movie.
I'm like, what?
Yeah, this is a lot is a hundred and forty minutes.
Oh, shit. It's a long boy.

(09:53):
That's a long boy. Yeah.
I've never been the biggest Lynch fan.
I like I love this movie.
Like, I'm glad we saw this movie in the theater.
I'm glad we had that option.
Peter, you and I have had this conversation about like,
sometimes it's good to see a movie in a place
where you just have to engage with it.
Totally. We went and saw Green Night right after the pandemic.

(10:14):
That was like our first theater experience.
And we both walked and Rachel, we the three of us walked out of that movie.
And I think the consensus was.
I don't think I liked it, but I'm glad I watched it.
Yeah, exactly.
I feel happy that I did that with people, but also what?
Yeah. But and I said, like, if I had had the option to watch that at home,

(10:34):
I would have been on my phone the whole time.
Yeah, that's a good, good way to put it.
I'm glad I was able to engage with this film for the first time
in a theater with people because I really do enjoy it.
And I don't think I'd enjoy it as much if I didn't have that.
If I wasn't like locked in, if I wasn't committed.
Yeah. Yeah, that was a really great experience.

(10:55):
And I'm glad that SIF was putting on that David Lynch. Absolutely.
I know I'm kind of sad that I missed out on that
because I think that that would have made a big difference for me
in that sort of like shared experience kind of aspect,
because I think I have not watched Wild at Heart with anybody
this entire time.
It's always just been me watching by myself.

(11:18):
And I think that I would enjoy it more with someone else,
even if it's just going like, what? Yeah.
Well, having somebody else to point out things
that are just nonsense and ridiculous is. Yeah.
Pretty, I'd say, important when watching David Lynch.
Yeah. I just watched Mulholland Drive the other day

(11:39):
for the first time.
And what do you think?
How did you enjoy the lesbian love scene?
Did you watch it with your parents?
That's how it's designed.
No, they couldn't make it up.
But I took photos and I sent them to my dad.
Of the scene or of you watching the same.
Both. I was really close to the scene.

(12:02):
I thought it was, you know, good.
I definitely didn't understand it when it made the change.
And I was like, OK, hold on.
Then I had to like watch it twice as hard.
And then I had to Google it.
Yeah. I don't really love a movie that I have to then like
look up the deep wiki on. Yeah.
It was so much.

(12:22):
I was like, what the fuck just happened?
OK, so what are the tiny people?
What about the trash guy? Yeah.
Is this a Dark Souls podcast now?
Yes. Always has been.
But I, you know, I enjoy this film.
It's it's just so weird.
It does get slow.

(12:44):
It gets so slow because I feel it feels like it's just
two different stories stitched together to make a film length.
Them getting away from jail and like breaking parole feels like one story
and then like everything from Big Tuna feels like a whole nother story.
Totally. But I really like Big Tuna.
Yeah, there's a lot of things in Big Tuna.

(13:05):
It's just like a reset
where you have a whole new influx of characters brought in.
It does kind of have that stage set up
where like there is kind of a halfway point.
That is where you go out and get drinks from the intermission
intermission and then you come back and it's like, let's all go to the lobby.

(13:26):
And then you come back and then, yeah, there's a whole there in a new place.
There's a whole there's like the end to a new antagonist in it.
Kind of. Yeah, it is its own like separate thing in a lot of ways.
Teeth get smaller.
You know,
teeth get smaller, hogs get bigger.
Yeah. That's how it goes with Willem Dafoe.
Ladies, just the horny just asking for it.

(13:49):
Oh, my God. Bobby Peru is so disgusting.
Definitely my favorite character and so repulsive.
I was talking to someone recently about the foes hog.
His troubling hog.
Was it somebody on the on the Max?
Because you shouldn't just be approaching people on the Max
to talk about Willem Dafoe's wang.

(14:10):
I mean, that seems like the ample place to have that conversation.
It's an ample way.
You've seen where I lived.
It's kind of interesting because Wild at Heart.
I mean, it's hard to say that anything had a easy or tough path,
because if you're a great movie or a great movie,
you're going to fucking slam through it.
But it did have kind of an easy path, given the stuff it went up against,

(14:30):
which was knowing Willy's Wonderland and Wicker Man,
which like all of those are great for dumb fucking reasons.
But, you know, it's not like a murderer's row of great movies
that it fucking slayed to get here.
Mm hmm.
Willy's Wonderland, I think of those three,
I have the most actual fondness for looking back on like Wicker Man.

(14:52):
I think is great for some really specific, stupid moments.
But like that movie sucks.
Yeah, it's not a movie that I enjoy watching.
There are scenes from it that I enjoy.
Yeah. Engaging with.
And knowing just gets weird, like great disaster.

(15:12):
You were clapped, but that's about it.
That's not knowing, isn't it?
No, no.
Knowing is the one where is that's the airplane one, right?
He sees the future through math.
Yeah. God, I hated that one.
Yeah, never mind.
I thought we at least got one good thing from that.
God, what's that one now?
The one where the Inuit between worlds between worlds.

(15:35):
Yeah. Yeah.
We're reading from Nicholas Cage's poetry book or whatever.
Yeah. Oh, yeah.
Knowing was really shitty.
Yeah. That was another Darryl one.
Yeah. Yeah. Good job, Darryl.
Because Darryl was on for Wicker Man, too.
Yeah. But I did like Willie's Wonderland.
That was definitely a fine film.

(15:58):
The crazier the pinball dance gets, the better.
True. Well, the sparkles.
I think we just left alone.
Do you think Nick Cage was just left alone in a room with cameras?
And they were just like, we'll be back in 20 minutes.
Do you mean he was left behind?
I meant for the pinball scenes.
I understood.

(16:18):
So wild at heart.
The David Lynch of it all is kind of the entire fucking thing.
Right. Like I cannot imagine a different director doing this movie.
Be so much straighter.
Like, yeah. Yeah.
Well, it would just be a like a pulp novel story.
Yeah. Because that's really all these where they were shorts.

(16:39):
Well, not shorts, but like, you know, little novellas.
Yeah. Pulp gas station stories.
Which I still think I would enjoy more.
Yeah. Yeah.
Just like little quick 30 minute films or whatever.
That's episodes. Yeah.
Yeah, I don't know.
I mean, there's stuff like the Elvis stuff that just doesn't hit for me.

(17:02):
Oh, I love the Elvis stuff.
Okay. Convince me.
I don't know, man.
Nicholas Cage just goes so hard on singing
these Elvis songs and I mean, for Nicholas Cage,
that's pretty fucking great.
Yeah. OK. I'll give you that.

(17:23):
It is. It's so weird.
Backflip out of the car.
Yeah, that seems great.
Just pulling over.
I can't do this anymore.
You find me some music on that radio.
I love that Power Mad is just always on our song.
Somewhere else somewhere.

(17:43):
That is the band, middle of fucking Big Tuna, or even just Poweroren.
Yeah. A band that never got like any real popularity, even in the eighties.
But yeah, like, I don't know.
There's just something about those Elvis scenes that are also just like.

(18:05):
like, you guys have a real
E energy, like big energy.
Tell me you know this one and then just like starts it and then they just go with it.
It's like, OK, of course, they know that.
Well, like there's and have practiced it. Yeah.
There are times where I'm like, this movie needs to pick a lane.
Is it like a gritty crime drama or is it magical realism?

(18:27):
Like, where where are we with this?
Well, I think with Lynch, that's exactly the fucking middle of the road
that he hits, right?
Yeah, it is always kind of that like crazy magic world,
but also like crime drama, you know, like.
But this one is and isn't like it's I'd I feel like it needs to

(18:48):
just go slightly harder either direction.
Yeah, I mean, like all the Wizard of Oz shit doesn't really do much
to light my candle, but yeah.
Yeah, those are weird additions for me, too.
But they don't it doesn't really fit.
And it's really just there so we can have the fucking Glinda scene at the end.
So like we can have a Deus Ex Machina poorly act

(19:12):
poorly acting, tell him, you know, to like go get the girl.
But it also gives us that Diane Ladd
like evaporating photo at the end, which is pretty hilarious and good.
Yeah, I do like the way they just kind of hit these mediocre
references all the way through and then just end it with her photo

(19:33):
evaporates because it got wet.
That is pretty good.
I do like that.
I mean, I fucking love the performances in this.
I think every weirdo character in the entire thing is still putting in a great,
great job. It's like I always just love I just die
when that old guy is vacuuming at the hotel.

(19:55):
He takes those steps and then like going backwards,
he takes little old man steps backwards.
Very Lynch.
Yeah, the the background characters are terrifically handled.
Everything from vacuuming guy to the porn stars

(20:15):
to the guy at the gas station, like snapping off the beat.
Yeah. You know, just the world building of the entire of Lynch's mind.
I mean, that's the part I might not like the structure of the films,
but I definitely love like the worlds they inhabit because they are
barely well realized.
Yeah, there's a pretty good vision for what he wants

(20:37):
and it's pretty consistent, I feel, with his other films, too.
Yeah. What year did this come out again?
Oh, 1990. God, Harry Dean Stanton just like fucking always looking fucking.
So old.
That dude has looked the same for so long.
I mean, he's dead now, right?
Yeah, he died not that long ago.

(20:58):
Yeah. But he looked 44.
So what he was 56 in this film.
Forty six.
Fifty six.
Fifty six. No, ninety forty.
Forty six. Oh, he looks like a bad forty six.
Yeah, that's pretty rough.
I think shit.
Who sat on this podcast like, well, we used to be able to smoke inside.

(21:20):
People used to smoke inside.
Well, yeah, smoking inside was awesome.
It was awesome.
Everyone looked like dog shit all the time.
Yeah. Dog shit and cool.
Well, sorry. Excuse me.
Like cool dog shit.
Like a turd with a cigarette.
A turd that you would definitely take home to meet your mom.

(21:41):
Absolutely.
Hey, I look back at my like at being a child
and I think about all of the stuffed animals that my parents
definitely bought me with like points from cigarettes.
Like I had several
Joe Camel plush toys.
See, that's just good parenting.

(22:02):
Yeah.
It's not like taking your kid down to a fucking baby fight club,
letting them bite on other kids and generally.
Yeah, bite him in the back.
Maybe like right on a cheek.
Dealer's choice.
I bit my brother on the cheek in a library when I was like sub one years old.

(22:25):
Nice. Really chomped him.
And my brother went over to my mom and was like, Peter, bit me.
She was like, OK, whatever.
And she looked and it was just like a full dental definition on his cheek.
I got that motherfucker. Yeah.
Kind of it for wild at heart, right?
Yeah. Those are my favorite things about it is just the world that he creates.

(22:46):
The yeah, the characters.
And I don't know, it's just
Nicolas Cage looks so cool in that snake skin jacket.
Undeniable.
He's got crazy good chemistry with Laura Dern throughout the whole thing.
For sure.
Yeah, the performances are great.
They're weird, which is what we're here for.
Yep. I thoroughly enjoy the movie.

(23:08):
It gets a little slow, but it feels the length.
I don't know that I have much more to add to
this conversation that, you know, nothing that I haven't said before.
Like, it's a good film.
So I realized where I fucked up earlier.
Vampires Kiss took out Between Worlds.
So Nic Cage poetry still in play for this episode.

(23:30):
Good. Yeah.
It took out Between Worlds, Color Out of Space and Mandy. Yeah.
This one had probably like Vampires
Kiss probably had the hardest track of any of these movies, I think.
Yeah, it was just all bangers all the way through.
Right. I mean, like Between Worlds is the weakest of those, but also like

(23:52):
it's so fucking weird to do that.
Like remember this bracket so much.
That was such a fun one to talk about.
Like that one from the word go is so just fucking out there
that I'm like, we're going to have fun with this. Yeah.
Well, those, you know, relatively early on in us having guests,
that was Gary and Rocks, you know, and like they go hard.

(24:13):
So like they knew their shit with that movie and it was a lot of fun to talk about.
Do you remember them, the the sex in the bathroom or whatever it was?
And then he's like choking her out after they sex
so that she can see her kid or whatever.
Yeah. What a fucking like movies are wild.
Can you imagine meeting up with somebody and they're like, I love to fuck.

(24:34):
And it's like, yes.
And they're like, I can see the dead, but only when I'm like halfway dead.
And really, right edging on that line of death and life. Yeah.
That's how fucking David Carradine died. You shouldn't do that.
I think a lot of people have died riding that line.
But I just like I just like mentioning David Carradine.

(24:56):
Also, the guy from an excess.
Tell me more people who have auto asphyxiated themselves.
I mean, those are the two I know.
I think Chris Cornell just hugged himself.
I don't think that was a sex thing.
Mm hmm. Same with Bourdain. Yeah.
No, I'm sad.
Let's talk about edging again.
That's so good.

(25:17):
Yeah, it's great. Keep riding that wave.
No, this will be
a man like the second I put it on in the like dumb music comes on.
I was like, fuck, yeah.
Yeah. Vampires Kiss brings me so much joy.
I love the the visuals of the film.
And going back to, you know, our conversation with Gary and Rocks,

(25:38):
what Gary said about like just those shots,
those establishing shots in the credits, you have all the traffic coming in
and out and kind of like pulsing like blood in the veins.
Or to your little flow. Yeah.
Yeah, it hits really good.
It's the subtlest part.
My is that even subtle?
I don't know if it's subtle, but I don't know.

(25:59):
I honestly had this movie is subtle.
Had he not said that, though,
I don't know that I would have paid attention to that being sort of like
a blood flowing kind of concept, but it really is there.
Like the more I watch it, the less I'm like the more and more I like.
I know I like when we started this process, I was very much just like, no,
that's like, I don't know why people think this movie is so crazy.

(26:19):
Like it's the acting is crazy, but like it's a pretty simple plot.
And the more and more I watch it, the more I'm kind of like
going down like the rabbit hole of like, wait, what is real?
What is reality? Yeah.
You try to pick it apart and it's like, when does the psychiatrist
become a figment of his imagination? Right.

(26:39):
Why would he ever not go on those dates with Jackie?
Like, I know he was hot.
She was great. Yeah.
Because he's in the thrall. Yeah.
Yeah, man.
I think the weakest point of this entire movie is
Jennifer Beals as the like vampirist as Rachel.
She just is like kind of nothing.

(27:00):
And like you can tell that they don't have chemistry.
Yeah, she is not like sultry or like, I don't know.
Yeah, like her just writing on top of him is not hot.
Yeah. I mean, that kind of works.
I run with Jackie and fucking around with Jackie was hotter.
But yes, that kind of that kind of works for me in terms of like this character,

(27:21):
because like it's a figment of his imagination
and he clearly isn't that into himself.
So like true.
Even the people he imagines are like
not that into like they're kind of bad at it.
I mean, they clearly don't have chemistry.
I that is true.
Like that is part of the problem with that performance.

(27:41):
But that lack of chemistry kind of works for that character in my mind.
Yeah. I mean, he had more chemistry with the imaginary girl
at the very end of the film, too,
especially when she's not there and he's just like yelling at the wall. Yeah.
Oh, I do.

(28:02):
I just I love I love the fucking when he finally just fucking snaps
and he's just like disheveled, like shuffling down the street
with a bit of a palette, the palette.
When he snaps those plastic teeth in and then just crawls away.
Yeah. I'm just like, oh,

(28:22):
I think what this movie does for me is no matter how many times I've seen it,
there's going to be performance moments that will just surprise me every time.
Yeah, I always forget about the crawling away until he does it.
And the like frantic way he catches that like stink bug to eat it.

(28:44):
Oh, yeah. And.
The drugged pigeon he has to catch. Yeah.
Well, it's just like, OK, because this movie was shot
without a union crew, without like proper like
through the proper channels, like how much of that again,
it's how much of that is just like just let Nick Cage loose in a park.

(29:08):
Like how much of this are we just not getting multiple
like takes of or is this just a no note situation?
Yeah, it is. I mean, it's kind of that like world of guerrilla filmmaking,
but it didn't have that background.
You know, it just was like kind of low budget.
So they were like, I don't know, do this in off hours.
Just run down the street and be crazy.
It's like, I love that shit.
And like, what a perfect character actor to pull into that in that moment, too.

(29:32):
It's like he is the ideal like just do your thing, dude.
Like, yeah, give us what you got.
Like, I cannot imagine that director being like, oh, Nick,
that's a little too much.
You know, I don't think anybody ever dialed it back down.
Yeah, they might be like, hey, that was pretty good.
Explore that a little bit.

(29:52):
What more can you give me?
What if you crawled off screen like a dog? Yeah.
No, that was definitely Nick Cage taking taking some liberties
in the moment, I have to imagine.
He's so fucking over the top in this movie and I love it so much.
It's like touching the mirror. Oh, Christ.
Oh, yeah. The way it like burns him when he touches the mirror.

(30:12):
Like and this goes to like, I mean, I probably been saying this.
I probably said this a million times at this point, but like,
it always goes to people things like Nick Cage is such a bad actor
for performances like this. Like, no, these are choices.
These are amazing choices.
Yeah. Like if you were a bad actor, like if if he were the bad actor,
one thing he has every performance would be this.

(30:34):
Right. True.
Or he never could have achieved this.
Like, I don't think Kevin Sorbo has it in him to do this.
I cannot imagine Sorbo in a movie like this.
Just Kevin Sorbo does Frankenstein's monster.
But he does it in the most wild Nicolas Cage performance ever.

(30:59):
How much do you think we can get Sorbo for?
How much do we think we could get Sorbo?
Do you want him to come to the the double feature?
All we have to do is tell him that he can talk all sorts of alt right nonsense.
Yeah. And he'd probably show up, but we'll give him a microphone.
I wouldn't mind platforming him so we can just like fucking rotten egg him. Yeah.

(31:20):
At what age does that happen to the human brain?
A sorbofication.
Yeah. Dean Cain went through it to Dean.
He went fucking hard.
When does like when does this happen to the human brain?
Well, I think you have to be bit by a vampire bat. OK. Yeah.
Yeah. You have to be a little bit drunk, a little bit horny, a little bit horny.

(31:42):
It was also pretty horny.
Yes, that's what happened.
He's a little bit drunk, a little bit.
It is the accent, the his accent in this movie.
It's one of the better Nicolas Cage accents. It's so good.
And that he maintains it.
Yeah. Now, Alva,
what's your favorite like this movie?

(32:04):
Fucking rules. I know.
What part of Alva?
God, there's so much Alva that we just haven't even talked about yet.
I do.
God, do I like the masculine admission more or like
the fact that she's just ironing clothes in front of a window with no drapes

(32:25):
or with the blinds open
and he comes with like a little packet of soup mix.
I know just like waving it around like it's drugs.
She's going to she's technically in a bra, but it's like huge.
It's like, you know.
Well, they were different times. Yeah.
Shoulder pads were big in the NFL and bras were really weird and pointy.

(32:45):
Man Alva's shoulder pads in the beginning of this film, too, are just enormous.
That's where you get the David Byrne confusion again. Yeah.
I guess this David Byrne, I'm not so sure anymore.
I think my two favorite moments with him for sure are the too late, too late, too late.
That's just like terrifying monster, but also hilarious at the same time.

(33:08):
And then just him slowly like being pulled from the dead,
just shouting her name and then running out and leaping onto her desk.
Like, there you are.
Credible. I mean, that's like that standing jump.
That box jump is impressive.
Even if you take like the athleticism out of this entire thing, it's like
just imagine being in an office space and you hear that from like three doors down.

(33:31):
You're just like, Oh, God.
Oh, my fucking boss.
He's going to I got to go in there and talk to him.
And it's like, Oh, no.
But he's like he's a middle manager, right?
He's not like he's not he's like nothing. Yeah.
And like he just gets away with all of that.
Yeah. Running around in the women's restroom. Yeah.
Like the screaming and shouting all the time.

(33:55):
Nobody takes her seriously until it's too late, which I mean, that's fucking.
That's too that's real.
I don't I don't know why that I keep getting hung up on that,
as if that's not a fucking real thing in this world. Yeah.
His speech about like how he would like no matter what,
he would always give her the shittiest job.

(34:16):
Oh, that's a brutal one.
He just cuts it right there.
Not not an Alva scene, but just like my favorite is Nick Cage part scene.
Just his weird inflections is when like he's freaking out
and he's like going into his office like, Tell him I'm in a meeting.

(34:37):
Yeah. Oh, man.
No, Peter Lowe is just what a like wild character.
I mean, it is definitely one of like the most stand out
Nicholas Cage characters.
Mm hmm. Absolutely.
I mean, yeah, we've we've talked about like the memeification of him and everything.
And it's like so many of them are from this movie.

(34:59):
And like it's just such like a wild, interesting, good, bad performance.
I don't know. It's very hard to put your finger on it because like you could look at it
and be like, this is so over the top.
But then you can also think about like when you're talking to Lauren
and she was saying, like, you know, this is being opera ish, you know,
it's these old timey black and white movies where everything has to be so big

(35:22):
because of what you're producing and presenting.
Yeah. And he's doing that.
He's channeling something different in a weird way.
But like it fucking works.
Yeah. It's the modern Nosferatu.
Yeah. And I like I do love that arc of he loves those movies
and that era of filmmaking so much and how from as we tracked his career
from like Peggy Sue got married and like the murder fingers

(35:46):
to to this to him eventually just playing fucking Dracula.
Yeah. Renfield was so fun.
That is a fun one.
I just I mean, I could just talk about this movie forever and just I like.
I know it almost feels like it's something I want to watch again tonight.
And it's like, I don't have time.

(36:07):
I probably put it on my iPad and watch it while I drive to Portland tomorrow morning.
Like, this is definitely one that has grown with me
as I've watched this, like my first view, like the first time through the bracket,
like I was viewing everything trying to, you know, from a critical lens
because, you know, how I interact with art.
But like as we've gotten through it more and more now,

(36:29):
we're just watching the movies we like and I can just watch these films.
My God, this movie just is so good because like the first time I watched it,
I was kind of like, this is this is bad, but I'm enjoying it.
Now I'm just like, now this is fucking genius.
Yeah, I mean, it is still kind of bad.
Like, it's still campy. It's still stupid.
Yeah. But like overall, I think like it's not the most well directed movie.

(36:52):
It's not the best music.
It's not the perfect cinematography, but like it's fucking great.
Yeah. All the elements come together and make quite the cosmic gumbo.
Yeah. Well, I think if it were a bad film, there would like
if it were truly just a bad film, you wouldn't have the little like touches
like when he bites the woman, when he kills the woman in the club, him,

(37:17):
like the little scene of him like sneaking the teeth back into his mouth.
Like you wouldn't have had those little touches where clearly
someone was paying attention.
OK, those teeth like do.
I haven't put one of those in my mouth in a really long time.
Do does it really like extend your face as much as it seems to do to him?

(37:37):
Well, it is just all plastic right up front.
So you wouldn't like you can't close your mouth all the way.
It's always like kind of open a bit.
Yeah. And they definitely don't go all the way back. Yeah.
I also didn't notice the first couple of times that she was just like
absolutely doing coke in that.
Oh, yeah. Back room. Yeah.
Oh, OK. Now I get it.

(37:57):
One of the random shit vending machines at a bar here in Portland
had one of those one night and I was trying to like
buy myself a two dollar pair of those plastic teeth.
And the machine just took my money and I wasn't going to spend
another two dollars on that bit.
Yeah. Yeah. If I see it again, I'll try.
Good call.
All right. So what do you guys want to set in stone for this one?

(38:18):
Who's the winner?
I think it's got to be a vampire's kiss.
Like, clearly, we're all much more like just
enthused by that film.
Yeah, it gets the people going, man.
It's a good film.
It's a great.
By my own metric in terms of like how I've been handled in this round,
what's the one I can recommend to anyone?

(38:41):
Vampires kiss.
I can't recommend a Lynch film to just.
Yeah, it's not for everyone.
Yeah. Go look at Bobby Perru's teeth.
I feel like I think both of these films like
come with a fairly decent sized caveat in terms of like
who I could recommend this to or if I recommend it, I'm like.

(39:03):
OK, just stick with it.
You'll get it. You'll get there.
Like this isn't a set it and forget it movie.
Like I think there's going to be a little preamble to getting
anyone invested in any of these movies if they're not already like.
Into the idea.
Yeah, I think it's just more consistent throughout its run

(39:24):
that it is just always going to be giving you something.
So really like sink your.
Bite down on. Yeah.
Nice. Well done.
Both of you.
Yours was better.
But yeah, vampires kiss, man.
It's it's a fucking banger, dude.
Yeah, I'm glad this isn't a tiebreaker situation in contentious

(39:46):
because it's 100% vampires kids for me.
Love wild at heart.
Love the stupid snake skin jacket and all that shit.
But like vampires kiss rules. It's so good.
Welcome to the final foreskin, Peter Lowe.
Yes. God pig versus vampires kiss.
That's a fucking that's a matchup.
It will make no sense at all in a head to head kind of concept, but still great.

(40:11):
Conair versus Raising Arizona.
It's going to be interesting.
We did a weird thing.
That means there's only like three official episodes left.
Yeah, I said that earlier.
Weird.
Yeah, this whole experiment's been wild at heart and weird on top.

(40:31):
Weird on top.
Oh, thanks, Lula.
Also, thanks to our Patreon supporters,
Josh, Sean, Josie, Rico, Matt, Adam and Bill
and to our cage dancers, Ira, John Freeman, Lance, Nathan and Cameron.
If Peter missed your name, let us know.
He'll say it twice next week.

(40:52):
Did you say Bill? Bill.
You said Bill. Bill. Bill. Bill.
Bill, Bill, Bill, Bill, Bill, Bill.
Bill, Bill.
Bye bye.

(41:13):
Nick, I have a question for you.
OK.
Are you watching burn notice or is this just a Josie thing?
Just Josie.
Oh, she just is watching for notice.
Josie just put on burn notice.
Why did she like text you about it?
Yeah, she texted me about it. She's like, I see why you like the show.
And then we talked about how we talked about like nice things about burn notice.

(41:34):
No, I've been in the room for like parts of episodes, but I'm not watching it.
Yeah, I don't doubt you that burn notice is fine.
I just I don't have time.
Yeah, I'm not pulling up like a serialized show from 30 years ago
or whatever the fuck came out.
Because I could I could get in on that.

(41:55):
I have opinions on Dark Souls.
Oh, I just started a new Elden Ring playthrough this morning.
Let me tell you about it.
No. OK. No.
You, Sean, the signal canceled.
We've got enough Sean audio.
We'll see something. It'll be fine.
That's true.
And just be slurs.
All the slurs we've recorded over the years.

(42:18):
Sean, no, don't say that.
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