July 9, 2024 • 28 mins
How do you juggle spontaneous social invitations when you're a die-hard Boston Celtics fan and a parent? It's a common struggle many of us face, and in this episode, we share our personal challenges and triumphs in balancing social life with the demands of parenthood. From the ways our social planning has evolved as more friends join the parenting club to the constant negotiation of prioritizing family time, we offer heartfelt and humorous stories that resonate with any parent trying to keep up with both their friends and their children’s schedules.
Ever thought about taking your kids to New York Comic Con or debating whether you’re the 'fun' parent or the 'responsible' one? We dive into these experiences and more, revealing the amusing dynamics of family life. We also reflect on those surprising moments when our kids suddenly show signs of growing up, from cleaning their rooms voluntarily to experiencing deeper voices. This episode is a candid and entertaining look at the joys and challenges of watching our children mature, all while balancing careers, personal hobbies, and the ever-important family time. Tune in for a relatable and lively conversation that any parent will appreciate.
Josh aka Bearded_Nova
I'm from Australia and am what you would call a father who games. I have 5 kids so not as much time to game as I used to. But I still game and stream when I can. So come join me on Twitch in chat as we chill out.
Business Inquiries: Bearded-n0va@aussiebb.com.au
Josh aka Moorph
I'm a US-based husband and father of two boys. I work full-time and have been a content creator since 2000. I'm a YouTube partner, Twitch and LiveSpace streamer who founded a content creation coaching company called Elev8d Media Group (elev8d.media). I'm a blogger, streamer, podcaster, and video-er(?).
Business Inquiries: josh@elev8d.media
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:01):
Turning off normal human male mode.
Switching to dad mode.
Welcome in to dad mode Withyour hosts Bearded, Nova and
Morph.
Speaker 2 (00:17):
Well, nova, I'm a big basketball fan, nba fan.
I love the Boston Celtics andshout out to them they just won
their 18th world title, which isawesome, by Brown and Tatum,
but anyway.
So I've got a friend that lovesthe Celtics as well, and he
lives a couple states away,probably an hour and a half, and
(00:39):
he has no kids.
We're about the same age, Ithink.
But he has no kids and every nowand then he's like hey, do you
want to come up and catch a game?
It starts at 7.30 and it's like4pm and I'm like dude, you're
an hour and a half away, that'snot the big deal, but I have
kids, do you not understand?
I guess you don't understand.
(00:59):
I can't just jump and do things, abandon everyone quickly,
that's not enough negotiationtime.
I can't just jump and do things,abandon everyone Quickly.
Yes, yeah, yes, that's notenough negotiation time with my
wife or time to find coveragefor the kids.
I mean, I guess I didn't reallyrealize when I was younger and
didn't have kids how much thingswould change.
(01:21):
But people that don't have kids, they don't get it.
No, they don't they don't.
Speaker 3 (01:28):
I find it's different now, over the last five, say
the last six years, five, sixyears, it's been dramatically
different because before that,especially early 30s let's say
by the time we're all out there,early 30s, 30-year-olds me and
my friends, it was maybe lessthan a hand like four, including
(01:51):
myself, that actually hadchildren.
The majority hadn't.
Nowadays we're at our 40s, Iwould say there's probably been
another four, five, six, so Iguess more over halfway now I'd
say majority of us, maybethere's about six of us that
don't have kids, and that'schanged the outlook on how
(02:11):
things are planned.
Now, activities, I will say thespontaneous requests, they've
kind of gone.
Even the ones that don't havekids have finally started to
realize over time that, okay,the ones that got kids, have
kids, have finally started torealize over time that, okay,
the ones that got kids arereally not struggling to catch
up to these events or come outor or do these things.
And now there's more and moreof us.
(02:32):
Everyone's kind of clued on tothe fact that, oh crap, these
guys actually need, all right,need a heads up.
We can't, you know, okay, I'mthinking of having a barbie.
I'm thinking of having, likeyou know, a barbecue at my.
I'm going to give a month'snotice, basically to everyone
nowadays.
But hey, this is what'shappening.
This is where I'm thinking ofdoing something, blah, blah,
(02:53):
blah.
And then people start pencilingit in, I guess, making plans.
We were looking at doing anevent soon, and do we do it with
friends?
Do we not do it with friends?
And I'm looking at going.
Well, this friend's traveling.
He's over on your side at themoment.
He's the one doing the roadtrip over there.
These guys are away.
This one's busy.
No, it's not a time to do anevent.
(03:14):
We're not going to do this asan event nowadays, and even when
these events do happen, thetime is different.
Yeah, the catch-ups, it's nolonger this.
You know, show up at 5, 6o'clock, 7 o'clock.
We'll keep drinking and havingfun.
You know, we might have dinner,we might have something cooked
by 9 o'clock, type of thing.
(03:34):
By then, you know, we've gothalf a dozen drinks into us, et
cetera.
It's a mess.
Instead, it's okay, cool, beover by 2 o'clock in the
afternoon.
I'll have food ready by four orfive o'clock.
People start leaving, you know,by eight o'clock, going home,
if that, or or if they're notleaving half of that after the,
(03:54):
the couple's left either onehalf of the couple's like all
right, I'm taking the kids home,he's staying here, don't stay
out too late, etc I rememberwhen my night out didn't start
till 9 or 10.
Speaker 2 (04:05):
Yes, now, I swear, if somebody, if I had a friend who
called and said at like 10, hey, let's go to a bar.
They're no longer my friend,it's just not happening.
No, I'm somebody that likes tostay up late, right, yeah, but
I'm not heading out to dosomething new.
No, no.
Speaker 3 (04:24):
I like this.
A football club down the roadfrom us, like a local football
club, not a professional league.
My name's more you know, andI'm a member.
I have another friend who livesliterally eight minutes drive
from my house.
It's one road.
I open the main road, drive tothe other end of the main road.
That's his house.
We rarely catch up One.
One road up on the main roaddrives to the other end of the
(04:45):
main road.
That's his house.
We rarely catch up One.
He doesn't have kids I do havekids and he still does goes out
to the football.
He's a member of the footballclub as well.
He likes to go there havedrinks.
I'd love to do it, but I justreally struggle at planning.
And then a couple of times Ihave I know I could just drive
over there, if he's home, grab abeer out of the fridge.
We could have a beer, hang outfor 10-15 minutes and like, like
(05:06):
, do it.
You know social check-in typeof thing.
I have tried that thoughrecently when I'm free, actually
, because he doesn't have kids,he has an active social life.
You know what I mean.
Oh, sorry, I'm out of the carclub I've gone to you know
convention or something you knowand he's.
He's hardly home either.
Speaker 2 (05:22):
I'm not familiar with this active social life.
I think you called it.
I know.
Speaker 3 (05:26):
Actually I've had the ability to, with work, go to a
football match recently I thinkit was meant to be last week,
last weekend gone, but I onlygot told a week before that.
I was like, oh crap, okay,let's try and scramble, get a
couple of clients together, onesI know I can usually call on at
last minute.
I'm like, hey, can you come?
(05:46):
First guy you know all threeguys Great, I've been to
football many times with them.
That's why I picked them three,because they usually come
together even though they're alldifferent businesses.
And first thing, you know, I getone of all said yes, obviously,
yeah, cool, it'd be great,great, catch up.
Then, oh, no, I can't make it.
My wife's got to work nextmorning, so I've got to be home
(06:09):
for the kids.
Okay, all right, that's cool.
That's one out, you know.
And then the next one I've gota thing with kids, but then I've
also got to be even furtheraway from there mid-morning.
I don't think I'm going to beable to make it.
Okay.
And then the third one was like, look, my wife's going away.
I think I've got stuff on, eventhough he's got an older child.
(06:30):
You know, I've got stuff on forher.
I'm not going to make it Likeeven a week.
A week wasn't enough to andit's not like.
You know it's a corporate event.
So we're in a box foods,provided, drinks.
You know it's a good event.
It's not like just going to agame.
In general, it's a yeah, youknow, a step up from that, and a
(06:50):
week wasn't enough notice forpeople with children.
Speaker 2 (06:53):
So let me ask you this do you, do you actually
remember all the things that areplanned, or are you like me,
where my wife could probablytell me a good dozen times and
I'm going to forget?
Still, google Calendar, see,but now I have to remember to
put it in there.
Speaker 3 (07:10):
Yeah, I'm terrible at putting things in there.
I don't mind it.
When people like Facebook I'mgoing to oh man, back a couple
of weeks ago generation boomerwill say Facebook, I love
Facebook events because it getsput to my calendar.
I really love it when myfriends are planning something
and they do a Facebook event.
That is the greatest thingbecause I know it's on my
(07:32):
calendar then that I can remindmyself of it.
I'm getting better at addingthings to the calendar that I
think of, but I do suggest topeople theion is to just set up
a Google.
Everyone's got a Google account, Thanks.
Set up a Google calendar, addyour partner and yourself to it
(07:53):
and just put everything on there.
Just everything.
I've got doctor's appointments,kid stuff Everything is on our
Google calendar, and I've gotthe fridge with the screen on it
, so it's kind of like an extrabonus at the Google Calendar.
Oh, that's cool.
The Google Calendar's on thatas well.
So when I go to the fridge, Ican actively see what's on the
calendar every day.
Speaker 2 (08:14):
So, honey, if you're listening, I want to get a
fridge with a screen on it.
You want to get Samson SmartFridge?
Yes, that is exactly what Iwant.
I don't know what it is, but Iwon't remember what we need to
do.
I went to pick my kid up fromschool and they're like well,
what was his classroom teacher,homeroom teacher?
I'm like I don't know.
Speaker 3 (08:35):
I checked my emails.
Speaker 2 (08:38):
It's September, something they're like.
Oh, you're just a dumb dad,here's your kid.
Speaker 3 (08:46):
I use emails to track my kids' teacher's names.
Teachers actively email parentshere like a lot, yeah, so I
think I at least get weeklyemails from teachers, either
it's just a classroom update orjust a reminder or something
that's coming up high schoolkind of similar, but primary
(09:08):
school especially, because inprimary school I don't know if
it's there, but it's the sameteacher the whole year.
Is that right with youreducation?
Do they keep the same teacher?
Basically?
Yeah, so primary school waymore easy to remember a teacher
because I'm getting the sameemail from the same teacher.
Basically, yeah, so primaryschool way more easy to remember
a teacher because I'm gettingthe same email from the same
teacher.
If you ask me what room that isin the school, though, uh,
where that's located, thanksthanks, okay, you know all right
(09:31):
.
Speaker 2 (09:31):
so yeah, I thought this would be a fun topic where
we could bond over forgettingthings, but it turns out I'm
just bad at being a parent and afather I used to be.
Well, let's change topics.
Speaker 3 (09:45):
Let's talk about how our friends are useless at not
knowing that we have kids andresponsibilities.
Yeah, there's that.
Speaker 2 (09:51):
Unrelated.
So I've talked before how I goto the New York Comic Con just
about every year.
Last year was the first year.
I brought my kids and it wasjust me and the two boys.
Like you know a guy's thing,right.
We I rented a hotel two daysand it was.
It was, we had a blast.
My, I couldn't feel my legswhen I got done, but you know we
(10:15):
had a blast.
Yeah, now this year, my, my wifesaid, hey, what if I started
talking about playing, what if Icame down with you guys?
And I'm like I don't know, wehad fun with the guys thing and
I offered doing a couple months.
And then, when it got time toactually buy the tickets, I'm
like, you know what, let's,let's, let's make it a whole
(10:35):
family thing.
And so I got tickets.
So today I picked my kids upfrom camp yep and I go to my
oldest son.
I'm like, hey, I got ticketsfor comic-con.
He's like, oh, that's awesome.
And I'm like, yeah, it's oursunday, so we're gonna go down
on saturday and go around thecity, have fun.
He's like, so, just like lasttime.
I'm like, not just like lasttime, mom's coming.
(10:56):
His response, response wasreally, and I decided to tell
her and she didn't appreciatethat.
I think she doesn't like that.
I'm the fun one because I thinkshe gets frustrated because I'm
the irresponsible one too, andI think it bugs her that I'm
(11:16):
quote-unquote the fun one.
Speaker 3 (11:17):
Well, last time last year, you came back with an
elevated status in the house,didn't you?
You went up a few points.
They graded you after the lastyear.
Yes, so I can understand herfear coming into this shit.
Yeah, right, but now it's hertime to shine.
It's her time to step it up.
She's going to outshow you onthis trip, basically, yeah.
Speaker 2 (11:43):
Maybe I can just be really not fun on the trip and
kind of set her up to be the funone.
Sometimes you get there.
Speaker 3 (11:49):
The last couple of days, the last two weeks, my
wife has somehow been elevatedin our daughter's eyes, dakota's
eyes.
I've always been the bigeverything in this house.
And then the last couple ofdays, actually, it's been my
eyes.
I've always been the big, youknow everything in this house,
and then the last couple of days, actually, it's been my wife.
I've been knocked down a peg,and it does.
It knocks you down a peg, likeI felt.
I felt defeated.
I wasn't as cool as I thought Iwas anymore to everyone.
(12:13):
But it helps, like I could seeit on my wife's face being
deemed the favorite for four orfive days, whatever it was, it
made her world.
She was so excited that she wasthe favorite for a little bit.
Speaker 2 (12:29):
She got a little taste of what you get every day.
Speaker 3 (12:33):
But now that it's kind of like going back the
opposite way, where I'm beingchosen as the favorite, she is
enjoying it, losing the titleagain, like it's just a little
bit.
She loved it, but now thatshe's losing it she's happy
because she goes.
I can actually do things.
I can walk in a room and not bestopped and have to play or do
(12:54):
something.
I can actually go get somethingto drink or do something like,
or if I want to clean something,because my wife loves cleaning,
really they're cleaning To thepoint that I said that's a
problem.
You know, like I think I had theconversation with her last
night around the lines of youknow, when you sweep the floor,
because our daughter, ourdaughter now yesterday was
(13:16):
caught with like a tissue wipingdown surfaces and then she goes
maybe I cleaned too much, thatshe's starting to do that and,
as she said that she's, thendakota's sitting at the fridge
trying to get the dustpan andbroom to start sweeping the
floor.
And I said you think and thatwas the conversation of, hey, if
you need to clean or you needto to, you know, the kitchen
(13:36):
floor is a little bit dirty,sure, sweep the kitchen floor,
but it doesn't mean you have tosweep the entire house.
You know what I mean.
It's okay to leave the flooralone for a day or two.
You don't have to do it.
Obviously, spot cleaning don'tleave the field.
But spot cleaning is fine andthe rest of it, but she does
(13:57):
kind of like OCD clean.
Yeah, a little bit too far.
Speaker 2 (14:03):
Yeah, that's, that's another topic.
That's another topic.
That's another topic.
My kids they pick up a lot ofmy habits leaving stuff
everywhere, playing gamesnon-stop, being sarcastic, yeah,
that's so.
They picked up my habits oncleaning, though.
This one, you know what.
You know what I'm I'm gonna.
I'm gonna save that.
That was a little teaser foreverybody.
(14:24):
We're gonna have an episodewhere we talk about some of that
household stuff, but yeah, sothey pick up my habits and I
wish I would pick up my wife's,because she's very organized and
she just gets shit done.
Yeah, you know what I mean.
And she, like she's on top ofyou, like we're gonna go on
vacation or go out to for a daytrip or something, and I like
(14:46):
wake up, whatever, and she'salready packed everything and
yeah, there's food and snacksand bottles and drinks, and you
know, as far as I know, we couldbe three hours from the house
and I go, hey, do you guys got ahat?
Speaker 3 (14:56):
to let know.
I'm like, oh, that's yourproblem, you know I mean,
whereas the wife has got allthat sorted.
I know we could be three hoursfrom the house and then I go,
hey, do you guys got a hat?
They're like, no, I'm like, oh,that's your problem, you know
what I mean Whereas the wife hasgot all that sorted.
Speaker 2 (15:05):
Yeah, I don't.
Sometimes I wonder like whatwould happen if she went away
for like a week business trip.
You're like I'm pretty surethat we wouldn't starve to death
or freeze to death, I'm prettysure.
Or freeze to death, I'm prettysure, you know, as long as my
credit card works, I can callUber Eats.
Speaker 3 (15:23):
We should have food.
My wife likes to make thatcomment a lot like about what
would happen.
Or, you know, you're watchingTV and see something and it's
like that would be you if Iwasn't around.
Yeah, I mean, she sees someonelike this, how they're living in
a life, especially like youknow, probably something like
this on tv, but they'd actuallynever leave.
(15:45):
And then I I showed herasmongold.
Yeah, you know, for those thatdon't know, asmongold's a big
streamer, master streamer.
I would say neurodivergent in away.
But does it, you know, doesn't?
You know, doesn't clean A verysimple life of living lives like
a slob.
The desk has got shiteverywhere, you know, food,
(16:07):
wrappers, drinks.
When I introduced that to mywife, she made a great point of
pointing out that that'sprobably what I would look like
if I didn't have children or awife or anything.
And you know, I, I mean I arguesometimes that I would clean,
you know, watching tv and seesomeone to like go, wouldn't you
?
Because you wouldn't clean ifthat was the case.
(16:27):
But no, I think if someone wascoming over with tv and a camera
to talk to me, I'm pretty sureI'd clean the kitchen to a
degree.
But yeah, I get it.
I get it like I am someone whocleans.
But yeah, like, yeah, Iwouldn't be a slob, I'd be a
little swift out.
Speaker 2 (16:42):
So I went to Toronto for a work trip last week or two
ago and where I stayed wasbasically a condo.
I was by myself.
Well, I was in that place bymyself.
It was a hotel, but it was likecondominiums, you know.
And I brought my Xbox because Iknew I was going on a business
trip.
I'd nothing to do, so I packedit and I brought my xbox.
(17:03):
I got a taste of what it wouldbe like and it's a lot like you
described, like I didn't want togo.
If I didn't want to go anywhere, I just order food and walk
down and get it.
I played xbox for five, sixhours after I got done with all
the work stuff.
Um, there was food boxeseverywhere, there was soda
bottles, you know, but it gotcleaned up.
Speaker 3 (17:24):
It gets cleaned up.
It does get cleaned up, don'tget me wrong.
It gets cleaned up, but there'sno urgency to it, right?
Speaker 2 (17:34):
Like you know she'll be, like can I take the trash
out?
And you know I'm like okay, andI have every intention on doing
it In an hour or two.
Speaker 3 (17:44):
There's a time frame put on it, though you know what
I mean.
You don't put.
You say yes, that means it'sgoing to be done.
Doesn't mean it's going to bedone now, but I think that's the
expectation.
I think that's the expectationof all wives.
I've said that to my wifemultiple times that if you want
me to do something and I say yes, don't get upset that I haven't
(18:04):
done it straight away, becauseit means I'm going to do it.
You didn't tell me when to doit, so I'm putting it into a
category of where I think I'mgoing to do it.
It doesn't mean, you know, ifyou go, hey, can you go do this
now or can you get this done in20?
I need this done by a certaintime frame, it'll be done.
It'll be done.
Yeah, I will do that thing, butjust don't be upset if you
(18:27):
don't put a time frame on it andI haven't done it to your time
frame what if every time shesaid, she added now, that would
be frustrating yeah, I haven'ttold her this.
Like we were talking before,I've been playing Star Citizen a
bit, yeah, and that's online.
You know it's like WoW, youknow it's an MMO and it costs
(18:51):
money.
Or I'm in the middle of doingsomething.
She doesn't quite understandwhen she's asking me to do
something all the time.
Or can you come here?
Can you come here and I saidI'm playing this game or
something that I don't show it100%, but she can pick up a
little bit, that I'm a littlebit frustrated at times, but I
still come.
Every time I still come.
I still do that, even thoughthat means I come back and I've
(19:12):
lost a ship full of cargo, I'velost a million dollars of
in-game currency or something,because I've had to walk away
knowing, oh fuck, somethingcould go wrong here.
Hopefully nothing goes wrong.
I'll come back.
Hopefully in time he doesn'tget that sometimes like and then
some of the now stuff doesn'treally need to be now you know
what I mean?
Speaker 2 (19:33):
I I don't, I wouldn't have left.
I'd be like, yeah, as soon asI'm done with this match.
Is would be typical response.
Most of the time I'm like holdon, give me a minute Because
both my boys play games onlinegames like Fortnite and whatever
so she understands that there'ssome games you can pause and
some games you can't.
Speaker 3 (19:54):
My wife doesn't.
My wife doesn't understand that.
Yet I'll probably say that theonus is on me.
I don't think I have actuallyspent the time to explain that
to her either.
You know what I mean.
I don't think I've sat down andexplained hey, some games you
can't pause, some games youcan't pause.
I mean, it frustrates me, butat the same time it's a game.
(20:14):
It's not the end of the worldfor me it's not the end of the
world.
Speaker 2 (20:19):
For me it's not the end of the world, but I get.
I definitely get tunnel visionsometimes when I'm playing games
, like the world just sort offades away.
And actually that's not a badthing, because sometimes I need
that escape.
But yeah, I'll be able torealize.
You know, you've been playingfor like 4 hours.
Really really yeah.
Speaker 3 (20:42):
Yeah, I get that I'll be in the middle of something
down here.
I'll be doing something.
She's like you've been there anhour.
I'm like, nah, it's been like10 minutes.
Oh, you said you were goingdown there to do one thing and
now you're playing games.
I did say that I was just doingthis one thing and I've got
distracted and gone sidewayshere on myself.
Speaker 2 (21:01):
Yeah, it happens, yeah, it happens.
I just say that's part of whatmakes me the fun one, because my
boys want to do that.
You know, I'm not going to sitthere and complain because I
want to do the same thing.
I get it.
I absolutely get it.
Speaker 3 (21:17):
I will say children change, though.
Children change over time.
A lot of our kids are not theoldest, the other she's, you
know, the 11-year-old,12-year-old.
She used to be a clean freak,like very organized, loved those
shows on Netflix where you knowthey organized cupboards and,
you know, really loved they weredoing that stuff.
(21:40):
She's a slob now, like I walkedin there today because she was.
I don't know what's happened.
I think we talked about her acouple episodes ago where I was
like hey, here, anyway, I actlike she was a stoner.
But she's not a stoner.
She, all of a sudden, the lastweek in a bit, has been spending
majority of her time outsidethe room.
(22:01):
Thanks, with us outside theroom, like coming in to sit down
, watching TV and interactingwith us parents, Right, I don't
know, it's just weird.
You know what I mean.
It's just really weird that allof a sudden this has changed
and she's happy, like reallyhappy, doing stuff.
I'll help do this, I'll do that.
It's been nice.
(22:23):
It's been really nice.
Some days it's school holidayshere as well and with my wife's
not working, she goes.
Oh, she might be out here forthe day.
We've watched three moviestoday, or something like that.
I'm like what?
Where before you could onlywatch like 20 minutes of a movie
and she'd get up and go.
I'm going and walk off.
So now it's different.
(22:48):
But I walked into her room thismorning and said oh, go, fire up
your computer, because she'sthe one that I built the little
cheap gaming PC for Fortnite andI'd never told her about how
Epic has free games.
I'm like, oh, I should show youthat Epic has free games.
You should claim them, even ifyou don't intend on playing it.
I'll show you how to do it.
Go, turn on your computer.
So she's gone and done that andthen I've walked into the room
to show her the room was clean.
I'm like what the hell is goingon with this child?
She's hanging outside the roomand the room is clean again,
(23:11):
confused.
That's suspicious.
I honestly can say that justlooking at her, she looks like
she's matured.
I don't know.
You know how your kids.
Just sometimes you look at yourkids and you realize they're
not the kid that you werelooking at, they're.
They're already look older in asense that they've.
She's dramatically done that ina like a in a week or so went
(23:35):
from that child to teenager.
Speaker 2 (23:39):
As such, it's like oh wow my oldest is 12, turned 13
later this year and I was justtalking with my wife a week or
so ago how he had over like thelast couple months.
He's actually just instantlylike matured.
It's weird, like he's still.
He still barricades himself inhis room and he's still.
(23:59):
He's.
Sometimes he's just a kid, buthe does.
He has some very mature momentsand I I'm like what, when did
that come from?
And now I can kind of see himas an adult sometimes, whereas a
year ago I'm like I don't thinkhe could ever be a functioning
person in society.
But now I'm like, oh wait,there's the person inside of him
(24:21):
.
Speaker 3 (24:22):
Even my 13-year-old, I swear.
Just overnight he's ballsdropped and he's just got this
deeper voice all of a sudden,just came out of nowhere.
I don't know where this camefrom.
I hold on.
Who are you when you talk tohim on the phone and that he's
got a totally different tone andI'm like where did this come
from?
Thanks, phone.
Speaker 2 (24:42):
Yes, like he sounds like he's normal, but on the
phone he's like hey, what'sgoing on?
Like, yeah, why is thereanother man in my house like
where did you come from?
That's exactly right.
Speaker 3 (24:54):
I don't know if it's.
I don't know if it's me lookingat it when I'm hearing the
older voice, but when I'm on thephone I'm not hearing that same
.
I'm not seeing that personanymore hearing that person.
It's it that?
Speaker 2 (25:06):
person.
It's weird To tie this to whatwe were saying earlier.
It's weird, but it's excitingto watch your kids go through
these stages and becoming adults.
If you don't have kids, youdon't get to experience any of
that.
There's definitely positivesand negatives to having kids,
but it's kind of cool watchingthem grow.
Speaker 3 (25:28):
Yeah, I've had a couple of friends that have all
had their first children, thanks, yeah, actually so far it's
been out of my friends, one, two, two have given birth already
and then there's another two.
One's going to be his secondchild at the end of the year.
No two others that both havetheir second child at the end of
the year and they're oppositesex of what they've had the
(25:49):
first time.
So you know, it's anopportunity, it's an experience
that's not easily replicated inany other way.
I guess you don't.
You know, and I know somepeople can't have children, but
you know you've got dog mums orcat mums, et cetera.
It's the same with dads.
(26:10):
There is that period, but it'snot exactly the same either.
You go from puppy to a dog,kitten to a cat.
The children experience is verymuch a unique one and it does
very much change from child tochild.
It's not the same.
It's the same experience foreach kid.
Speaker 2 (26:28):
I used to think that the boys would have the same
exact personalities, but they donot, and so that's been
interesting as well.
But I would say one thing thatI like about.
There's a lot of things I likeabout being a parent.
A lot of things I don't likeabout it too.
But I've learned a lot aboutmyself as I've raised them, you
(26:50):
know, because you can see habitsthat they have that they
probably got from you and maybelike oh, I need to change this
or I need to stop doing that, or, you know, you see them making
some of the same sillyobservations they're doing with
things when you're a kid andit's like, oh, it makes sense
now.
It's pretty cool, it'seye-opening.
Speaker 3 (27:12):
Absolutely.
Just to put it out there, myfriends that hear this if you
don't have children and you havefriends with children, give
them notice.
Give us notice on an eventthat's all Wrapping this back up
.
Give us notice and we'll beable to make it happen.
Speaker 2 (27:28):
Thanks, Thanks, and I'm going to give everybody
listening a notice and we'll beback next week.
Thanks, thanks.
Speaker 1 (27:37):
You've been listening to Dad Mode.
Our passion is navigating thiswild journey of parenthood and
modern life, from balancingfamily time to managing your
career and still squeezing insome gaming and content creation
.
And no matter what the womensay, they will never be able to
(27:58):
pry the controller out of ourcold dead hands.
Anyway, we hope you enjoyed theshow.
If you did, find us on Twitter,tiktok and YouTube at
DadModePodcast and we can befound on every podcast site at
DadModePodcast.
(28:18):
Y'all be cool.
See you next time.
Turning off normal human male mode.
Switching to dad mode.
Welcome in to dad mode Withyour hosts Bearded, Nova and
Morph.
Speaker 2 (00:17):
Well, nova, I'm a big basketball fan, nba fan.
I love the Boston Celtics andshout out to them they just won
their 18th world title, which isawesome, by Brown and Tatum,
but anyway.
So I've got a friend that lovesthe Celtics as well, and he
lives a couple states away,probably an hour and a half, and
(00:39):
he has no kids.
We're about the same age, Ithink.
But he has no kids and every nowand then he's like hey, do you
want to come up and catch a game?
It starts at 7.30 and it's like4pm and I'm like dude, you're
an hour and a half away, that'snot the big deal, but I have
kids, do you not understand?
I guess you don't understand.
(00:59):
I can't just jump and do things, abandon everyone quickly,
that's not enough negotiationtime.
I can't just jump and do things,abandon everyone Quickly.
Yes, yeah, yes, that's notenough negotiation time with my
wife or time to find coveragefor the kids.
I mean, I guess I didn't reallyrealize when I was younger and
didn't have kids how much thingswould change.
(01:21):
But people that don't have kids, they don't get it.
No, they don't they don't.
Speaker 3 (01:28):
I find it's different now, over the last five, say
the last six years, five, sixyears, it's been dramatically
different because before that,especially early 30s let's say
by the time we're all out there,early 30s, 30-year-olds me and
my friends, it was maybe lessthan a hand like four, including
(01:51):
myself, that actually hadchildren.
The majority hadn't.
Nowadays we're at our 40s, Iwould say there's probably been
another four, five, six, so Iguess more over halfway now I'd
say majority of us, maybethere's about six of us that
don't have kids, and that'schanged the outlook on how
(02:11):
things are planned.
Now, activities, I will say thespontaneous requests, they've
kind of gone.
Even the ones that don't havekids have finally started to
realize over time that, okay,the ones that got kids, have
kids, have finally started torealize over time that, okay,
the ones that got kids arereally not struggling to catch
up to these events or come outor or do these things.
And now there's more and moreof us.
(02:32):
Everyone's kind of clued on tothe fact that, oh crap, these
guys actually need, all right,need a heads up.
We can't, you know, okay, I'mthinking of having a barbie.
I'm thinking of having, likeyou know, a barbecue at my.
I'm going to give a month'snotice, basically to everyone
nowadays.
But hey, this is what'shappening.
This is where I'm thinking ofdoing something, blah, blah,
(02:53):
blah.
And then people start pencilingit in, I guess, making plans.
We were looking at doing anevent soon, and do we do it with
friends?
Do we not do it with friends?
And I'm looking at going.
Well, this friend's traveling.
He's over on your side at themoment.
He's the one doing the roadtrip over there.
These guys are away.
This one's busy.
No, it's not a time to do anevent.
(03:14):
We're not going to do this asan event nowadays, and even when
these events do happen, thetime is different.
Yeah, the catch-ups, it's nolonger this.
You know, show up at 5, 6o'clock, 7 o'clock.
We'll keep drinking and havingfun.
You know, we might have dinner,we might have something cooked
by 9 o'clock, type of thing.
(03:34):
By then, you know, we've gothalf a dozen drinks into us, et
cetera.
It's a mess.
Instead, it's okay, cool, beover by 2 o'clock in the
afternoon.
I'll have food ready by four orfive o'clock.
People start leaving, you know,by eight o'clock, going home,
if that, or or if they're notleaving half of that after the,
(03:54):
the couple's left either onehalf of the couple's like all
right, I'm taking the kids home,he's staying here, don't stay
out too late, etc I rememberwhen my night out didn't start
till 9 or 10.
Speaker 2 (04:05):
Yes, now, I swear, if somebody, if I had a friend who
called and said at like 10, hey, let's go to a bar.
They're no longer my friend,it's just not happening.
No, I'm somebody that likes tostay up late, right, yeah, but
I'm not heading out to dosomething new.
No, no.
Speaker 3 (04:24):
I like this.
A football club down the roadfrom us, like a local football
club, not a professional league.
My name's more you know, andI'm a member.
I have another friend who livesliterally eight minutes drive
from my house.
It's one road.
I open the main road, drive tothe other end of the main road.
That's his house.
We rarely catch up One.
One road up on the main roaddrives to the other end of the
(04:45):
main road.
That's his house.
We rarely catch up One.
He doesn't have kids I do havekids and he still does goes out
to the football.
He's a member of the footballclub as well.
He likes to go there havedrinks.
I'd love to do it, but I justreally struggle at planning.
And then a couple of times Ihave I know I could just drive
over there, if he's home, grab abeer out of the fridge.
We could have a beer, hang outfor 10-15 minutes and like, like
(05:06):
, do it.
You know social check-in typeof thing.
I have tried that thoughrecently when I'm free, actually
, because he doesn't have kids,he has an active social life.
You know what I mean.
Oh, sorry, I'm out of the carclub I've gone to you know
convention or something you knowand he's.
He's hardly home either.
Speaker 2 (05:22):
I'm not familiar with this active social life.
I think you called it.
I know.
Speaker 3 (05:26):
Actually I've had the ability to, with work, go to a
football match recently I thinkit was meant to be last week,
last weekend gone, but I onlygot told a week before that.
I was like, oh crap, okay,let's try and scramble, get a
couple of clients together, onesI know I can usually call on at
last minute.
I'm like, hey, can you come?
(05:46):
First guy you know all threeguys Great, I've been to
football many times with them.
That's why I picked them three,because they usually come
together even though they're alldifferent businesses.
And first thing, you know, I getone of all said yes, obviously,
yeah, cool, it'd be great,great, catch up.
Then, oh, no, I can't make it.
My wife's got to work nextmorning, so I've got to be home
(06:09):
for the kids.
Okay, all right, that's cool.
That's one out, you know.
And then the next one I've gota thing with kids, but then I've
also got to be even furtheraway from there mid-morning.
I don't think I'm going to beable to make it.
Okay.
And then the third one was like, look, my wife's going away.
I think I've got stuff on, eventhough he's got an older child.
(06:30):
You know, I've got stuff on forher.
I'm not going to make it Likeeven a week.
A week wasn't enough to andit's not like.
You know it's a corporate event.
So we're in a box foods,provided, drinks.
You know it's a good event.
It's not like just going to agame.
In general, it's a yeah, youknow, a step up from that, and a
(06:50):
week wasn't enough notice forpeople with children.
Speaker 2 (06:53):
So let me ask you this do you, do you actually
remember all the things that areplanned, or are you like me,
where my wife could probablytell me a good dozen times and
I'm going to forget?
Still, google Calendar, see,but now I have to remember to
put it in there.
Speaker 3 (07:10):
Yeah, I'm terrible at putting things in there.
I don't mind it.
When people like Facebook I'mgoing to oh man, back a couple
of weeks ago generation boomerwill say Facebook, I love
Facebook events because it getsput to my calendar.
I really love it when myfriends are planning something
and they do a Facebook event.
That is the greatest thingbecause I know it's on my
(07:32):
calendar then that I can remindmyself of it.
I'm getting better at addingthings to the calendar that I
think of, but I do suggest topeople theion is to just set up
a Google.
Everyone's got a Google account, Thanks.
Set up a Google calendar, addyour partner and yourself to it
(07:53):
and just put everything on there.
Just everything.
I've got doctor's appointments,kid stuff Everything is on our
Google calendar, and I've gotthe fridge with the screen on it
, so it's kind of like an extrabonus at the Google Calendar.
Oh, that's cool.
The Google Calendar's on thatas well.
So when I go to the fridge, Ican actively see what's on the
calendar every day.
Speaker 2 (08:14):
So, honey, if you're listening, I want to get a
fridge with a screen on it.
You want to get Samson SmartFridge?
Yes, that is exactly what Iwant.
I don't know what it is, but Iwon't remember what we need to
do.
I went to pick my kid up fromschool and they're like well,
what was his classroom teacher,homeroom teacher?
I'm like I don't know.
Speaker 3 (08:35):
I checked my emails.
Speaker 2 (08:38):
It's September, something they're like.
Oh, you're just a dumb dad,here's your kid.
Speaker 3 (08:46):
I use emails to track my kids' teacher's names.
Teachers actively email parentshere like a lot, yeah, so I
think I at least get weeklyemails from teachers, either
it's just a classroom update orjust a reminder or something
that's coming up high schoolkind of similar, but primary
(09:08):
school especially, because inprimary school I don't know if
it's there, but it's the sameteacher the whole year.
Is that right with youreducation?
Do they keep the same teacher?
Basically?
Yeah, so primary school waymore easy to remember a teacher
because I'm getting the sameemail from the same teacher.
Basically, yeah, so primaryschool way more easy to remember
a teacher because I'm gettingthe same email from the same
teacher.
If you ask me what room that isin the school, though, uh,
where that's located, thanksthanks, okay, you know all right
(09:31):
.
Speaker 2 (09:31):
so yeah, I thought this would be a fun topic where
we could bond over forgettingthings, but it turns out I'm
just bad at being a parent and afather I used to be.
Well, let's change topics.
Speaker 3 (09:45):
Let's talk about how our friends are useless at not
knowing that we have kids andresponsibilities.
Yeah, there's that.
Speaker 2 (09:51):
Unrelated.
So I've talked before how I goto the New York Comic Con just
about every year.
Last year was the first year.
I brought my kids and it wasjust me and the two boys.
Like you know a guy's thing,right.
We I rented a hotel two daysand it was.
It was, we had a blast.
My, I couldn't feel my legswhen I got done, but you know we
(10:15):
had a blast.
Yeah, now this year, my, my wifesaid, hey, what if I started
talking about playing, what if Icame down with you guys?
And I'm like I don't know, wehad fun with the guys thing and
I offered doing a couple months.
And then, when it got time toactually buy the tickets, I'm
like, you know what, let's,let's, let's make it a whole
(10:35):
family thing.
And so I got tickets.
So today I picked my kids upfrom camp yep and I go to my
oldest son.
I'm like, hey, I got ticketsfor comic-con.
He's like, oh, that's awesome.
And I'm like, yeah, it's oursunday, so we're gonna go down
on saturday and go around thecity, have fun.
He's like, so, just like lasttime.
I'm like, not just like lasttime, mom's coming.
(10:56):
His response, response wasreally, and I decided to tell
her and she didn't appreciatethat.
I think she doesn't like that.
I'm the fun one because I thinkshe gets frustrated because I'm
the irresponsible one too, andI think it bugs her that I'm
(11:16):
quote-unquote the fun one.
Speaker 3 (11:17):
Well, last time last year, you came back with an
elevated status in the house,didn't you?
You went up a few points.
They graded you after the lastyear.
Yes, so I can understand herfear coming into this shit.
Yeah, right, but now it's hertime to shine.
It's her time to step it up.
She's going to outshow you onthis trip, basically, yeah.
Speaker 2 (11:43):
Maybe I can just be really not fun on the trip and
kind of set her up to be the funone.
Sometimes you get there.
Speaker 3 (11:49):
The last couple of days, the last two weeks, my
wife has somehow been elevatedin our daughter's eyes, dakota's
eyes.
I've always been the bigeverything in this house.
And then the last couple ofdays, actually, it's been my
eyes.
I've always been the big, youknow everything in this house,
and then the last couple of days, actually, it's been my wife.
I've been knocked down a peg,and it does.
It knocks you down a peg, likeI felt.
I felt defeated.
I wasn't as cool as I thought Iwas anymore to everyone.
(12:13):
But it helps, like I could seeit on my wife's face being
deemed the favorite for four orfive days, whatever it was, it
made her world.
She was so excited that she wasthe favorite for a little bit.
Speaker 2 (12:29):
She got a little taste of what you get every day.
Speaker 3 (12:33):
But now that it's kind of like going back the
opposite way, where I'm beingchosen as the favorite, she is
enjoying it, losing the titleagain, like it's just a little
bit.
She loved it, but now thatshe's losing it she's happy
because she goes.
I can actually do things.
I can walk in a room and not bestopped and have to play or do
(12:54):
something.
I can actually go get somethingto drink or do something like,
or if I want to clean something,because my wife loves cleaning,
really they're cleaning To thepoint that I said that's a
problem.
You know, like I think I had theconversation with her last
night around the lines of youknow, when you sweep the floor,
because our daughter, ourdaughter now yesterday was
(13:16):
caught with like a tissue wipingdown surfaces and then she goes
maybe I cleaned too much, thatshe's starting to do that and,
as she said that she's, thendakota's sitting at the fridge
trying to get the dustpan andbroom to start sweeping the
floor.
And I said you think and thatwas the conversation of, hey, if
you need to clean or you needto to, you know, the kitchen
(13:36):
floor is a little bit dirty,sure, sweep the kitchen floor,
but it doesn't mean you have tosweep the entire house.
You know what I mean.
It's okay to leave the flooralone for a day or two.
You don't have to do it.
Obviously, spot cleaning don'tleave the field.
But spot cleaning is fine andthe rest of it, but she does
(13:57):
kind of like OCD clean.
Yeah, a little bit too far.
Speaker 2 (14:03):
Yeah, that's, that's another topic.
That's another topic.
That's another topic.
My kids they pick up a lot ofmy habits leaving stuff
everywhere, playing gamesnon-stop, being sarcastic, yeah,
that's so.
They picked up my habits oncleaning, though.
This one, you know what.
You know what I'm I'm gonna.
I'm gonna save that.
That was a little teaser foreverybody.
(14:24):
We're gonna have an episodewhere we talk about some of that
household stuff, but yeah, sothey pick up my habits and I
wish I would pick up my wife's,because she's very organized and
she just gets shit done.
Yeah, you know what I mean.
And she, like she's on top ofyou, like we're gonna go on
vacation or go out to for a daytrip or something, and I like
(14:46):
wake up, whatever, and she'salready packed everything and
yeah, there's food and snacksand bottles and drinks, and you
know, as far as I know, we couldbe three hours from the house
and I go, hey, do you guys got ahat?
Speaker 3 (14:56):
to let know.
I'm like, oh, that's yourproblem, you know I mean,
whereas the wife has got allthat sorted.
I know we could be three hoursfrom the house and then I go,
hey, do you guys got a hat?
They're like, no, I'm like, oh,that's your problem, you know
what I mean Whereas the wife hasgot all that sorted.
Speaker 2 (15:05):
Yeah, I don't.
Sometimes I wonder like whatwould happen if she went away
for like a week business trip.
You're like I'm pretty surethat we wouldn't starve to death
or freeze to death, I'm prettysure.
Or freeze to death, I'm prettysure, you know, as long as my
credit card works, I can callUber Eats.
Speaker 3 (15:23):
We should have food.
My wife likes to make thatcomment a lot like about what
would happen.
Or, you know, you're watchingTV and see something and it's
like that would be you if Iwasn't around.
Yeah, I mean, she sees someonelike this, how they're living in
a life, especially like youknow, probably something like
this on tv, but they'd actuallynever leave.
(15:45):
And then I I showed herasmongold.
Yeah, you know, for those thatdon't know, asmongold's a big
streamer, master streamer.
I would say neurodivergent in away.
But does it, you know, doesn't?
You know, doesn't clean A verysimple life of living lives like
a slob.
The desk has got shiteverywhere, you know, food,
(16:07):
wrappers, drinks.
When I introduced that to mywife, she made a great point of
pointing out that that'sprobably what I would look like
if I didn't have children or awife or anything.
And you know, I, I mean I arguesometimes that I would clean,
you know, watching tv and seesomeone to like go, wouldn't you
?
Because you wouldn't clean ifthat was the case.
(16:27):
But no, I think if someone wascoming over with tv and a camera
to talk to me, I'm pretty sureI'd clean the kitchen to a
degree.
But yeah, I get it.
I get it like I am someone whocleans.
But yeah, like, yeah, Iwouldn't be a slob, I'd be a
little swift out.
Speaker 2 (16:42):
So I went to Toronto for a work trip last week or two
ago and where I stayed wasbasically a condo.
I was by myself.
Well, I was in that place bymyself.
It was a hotel, but it was likecondominiums, you know.
And I brought my Xbox because Iknew I was going on a business
trip.
I'd nothing to do, so I packedit and I brought my xbox.
(17:03):
I got a taste of what it wouldbe like and it's a lot like you
described, like I didn't want togo.
If I didn't want to go anywhere, I just order food and walk
down and get it.
I played xbox for five, sixhours after I got done with all
the work stuff.
Um, there was food boxeseverywhere, there was soda
bottles, you know, but it gotcleaned up.
Speaker 3 (17:24):
It gets cleaned up.
It does get cleaned up, don'tget me wrong.
It gets cleaned up, but there'sno urgency to it, right?
Speaker 2 (17:34):
Like you know she'll be, like can I take the trash
out?
And you know I'm like okay, andI have every intention on doing
it In an hour or two.
Speaker 3 (17:44):
There's a time frame put on it, though you know what
I mean.
You don't put.
You say yes, that means it'sgoing to be done.
Doesn't mean it's going to bedone now, but I think that's the
expectation.
I think that's the expectationof all wives.
I've said that to my wifemultiple times that if you want
me to do something and I say yes, don't get upset that I haven't
(18:04):
done it straight away, becauseit means I'm going to do it.
You didn't tell me when to doit, so I'm putting it into a
category of where I think I'mgoing to do it.
It doesn't mean, you know, ifyou go, hey, can you go do this
now or can you get this done in20?
I need this done by a certaintime frame, it'll be done.
It'll be done.
Yeah, I will do that thing, butjust don't be upset if you
(18:27):
don't put a time frame on it andI haven't done it to your time
frame what if every time shesaid, she added now, that would
be frustrating yeah, I haven'ttold her this.
Like we were talking before,I've been playing Star Citizen a
bit, yeah, and that's online.
You know it's like WoW, youknow it's an MMO and it costs
(18:51):
money.
Or I'm in the middle of doingsomething.
She doesn't quite understandwhen she's asking me to do
something all the time.
Or can you come here?
Can you come here and I saidI'm playing this game or
something that I don't show it100%, but she can pick up a
little bit, that I'm a littlebit frustrated at times, but I
still come.
Every time I still come.
I still do that, even thoughthat means I come back and I've
(19:12):
lost a ship full of cargo, I'velost a million dollars of
in-game currency or something,because I've had to walk away
knowing, oh fuck, somethingcould go wrong here.
Hopefully nothing goes wrong.
I'll come back.
Hopefully in time he doesn'tget that sometimes like and then
some of the now stuff doesn'treally need to be now you know
what I mean?
Speaker 2 (19:33):
I I don't, I wouldn't have left.
I'd be like, yeah, as soon asI'm done with this match.
Is would be typical response.
Most of the time I'm like holdon, give me a minute Because
both my boys play games onlinegames like Fortnite and whatever
so she understands that there'ssome games you can pause and
some games you can't.
Speaker 3 (19:54):
My wife doesn't.
My wife doesn't understand that.
Yet I'll probably say that theonus is on me.
I don't think I have actuallyspent the time to explain that
to her either.
You know what I mean.
I don't think I've sat down andexplained hey, some games you
can't pause, some games youcan't pause.
I mean, it frustrates me, butat the same time it's a game.
(20:14):
It's not the end of the worldfor me it's not the end of the
world.
Speaker 2 (20:19):
For me it's not the end of the world, but I get.
I definitely get tunnel visionsometimes when I'm playing games
, like the world just sort offades away.
And actually that's not a badthing, because sometimes I need
that escape.
But yeah, I'll be able torealize.
You know, you've been playingfor like 4 hours.
Really really yeah.
Speaker 3 (20:42):
Yeah, I get that I'll be in the middle of something
down here.
I'll be doing something.
She's like you've been there anhour.
I'm like, nah, it's been like10 minutes.
Oh, you said you were goingdown there to do one thing and
now you're playing games.
I did say that I was just doingthis one thing and I've got
distracted and gone sidewayshere on myself.
Speaker 2 (21:01):
Yeah, it happens, yeah, it happens.
I just say that's part of whatmakes me the fun one, because my
boys want to do that.
You know, I'm not going to sitthere and complain because I
want to do the same thing.
I get it.
I absolutely get it.
Speaker 3 (21:17):
I will say children change, though.
Children change over time.
A lot of our kids are not theoldest, the other she's, you
know, the 11-year-old,12-year-old.
She used to be a clean freak,like very organized, loved those
shows on Netflix where you knowthey organized cupboards and,
you know, really loved they weredoing that stuff.
(21:40):
She's a slob now, like I walkedin there today because she was.
I don't know what's happened.
I think we talked about her acouple episodes ago where I was
like hey, here, anyway, I actlike she was a stoner.
But she's not a stoner.
She, all of a sudden, the lastweek in a bit, has been spending
majority of her time outsidethe room.
(22:01):
Thanks, with us outside theroom, like coming in to sit down
, watching TV and interactingwith us parents, Right, I don't
know, it's just weird.
You know what I mean.
It's just really weird that allof a sudden this has changed
and she's happy, like reallyhappy, doing stuff.
I'll help do this, I'll do that.
It's been nice.
(22:23):
It's been really nice.
Some days it's school holidayshere as well and with my wife's
not working, she goes.
Oh, she might be out here forthe day.
We've watched three moviestoday, or something like that.
I'm like what?
Where before you could onlywatch like 20 minutes of a movie
and she'd get up and go.
I'm going and walk off.
So now it's different.
(22:48):
But I walked into her room thismorning and said oh, go, fire up
your computer, because she'sthe one that I built the little
cheap gaming PC for Fortnite andI'd never told her about how
Epic has free games.
I'm like, oh, I should show youthat Epic has free games.
You should claim them, even ifyou don't intend on playing it.
I'll show you how to do it.
Go, turn on your computer.
So she's gone and done that andthen I've walked into the room
to show her the room was clean.
I'm like what the hell is goingon with this child?
She's hanging outside the roomand the room is clean again,
(23:11):
confused.
That's suspicious.
I honestly can say that justlooking at her, she looks like
she's matured.
I don't know.
You know how your kids.
Just sometimes you look at yourkids and you realize they're
not the kid that you werelooking at, they're.
They're already look older in asense that they've.
She's dramatically done that ina like a in a week or so went
(23:35):
from that child to teenager.
Speaker 2 (23:39):
As such, it's like oh wow my oldest is 12, turned 13
later this year and I was justtalking with my wife a week or
so ago how he had over like thelast couple months.
He's actually just instantlylike matured.
It's weird, like he's still.
He still barricades himself inhis room and he's still.
(23:59):
He's.
Sometimes he's just a kid, buthe does.
He has some very mature momentsand I I'm like what, when did
that come from?
And now I can kind of see himas an adult sometimes, whereas a
year ago I'm like I don't thinkhe could ever be a functioning
person in society.
But now I'm like, oh wait,there's the person inside of him
(24:21):
.
Speaker 3 (24:22):
Even my 13-year-old, I swear.
Just overnight he's ballsdropped and he's just got this
deeper voice all of a sudden,just came out of nowhere.
I don't know where this camefrom.
I hold on.
Who are you when you talk tohim on the phone and that he's
got a totally different tone andI'm like where did this come
from?
Thanks, phone.
Speaker 2 (24:42):
Yes, like he sounds like he's normal, but on the
phone he's like hey, what'sgoing on?
Like, yeah, why is thereanother man in my house like
where did you come from?
That's exactly right.
Speaker 3 (24:54):
I don't know if it's.
I don't know if it's me lookingat it when I'm hearing the
older voice, but when I'm on thephone I'm not hearing that same
.
I'm not seeing that personanymore hearing that person.
It's it that?
Speaker 2 (25:06):
person.
It's weird To tie this to whatwe were saying earlier.
It's weird, but it's excitingto watch your kids go through
these stages and becoming adults.
If you don't have kids, youdon't get to experience any of
that.
There's definitely positivesand negatives to having kids,
but it's kind of cool watchingthem grow.
Speaker 3 (25:28):
Yeah, I've had a couple of friends that have all
had their first children, thanks, yeah, actually so far it's
been out of my friends, one, two, two have given birth already
and then there's another two.
One's going to be his secondchild at the end of the year.
No two others that both havetheir second child at the end of
the year and they're oppositesex of what they've had the
(25:49):
first time.
So you know, it's anopportunity, it's an experience
that's not easily replicated inany other way.
I guess you don't.
You know, and I know somepeople can't have children, but
you know you've got dog mums orcat mums, et cetera.
It's the same with dads.
(26:10):
There is that period, but it'snot exactly the same either.
You go from puppy to a dog,kitten to a cat.
The children experience is verymuch a unique one and it does
very much change from child tochild.
It's not the same.
It's the same experience foreach kid.
Speaker 2 (26:28):
I used to think that the boys would have the same
exact personalities, but they donot, and so that's been
interesting as well.
But I would say one thing thatI like about.
There's a lot of things I likeabout being a parent.
A lot of things I don't likeabout it too.
But I've learned a lot aboutmyself as I've raised them, you
(26:50):
know, because you can see habitsthat they have that they
probably got from you and maybelike oh, I need to change this
or I need to stop doing that, or, you know, you see them making
some of the same sillyobservations they're doing with
things when you're a kid andit's like, oh, it makes sense
now.
It's pretty cool, it'seye-opening.
Speaker 3 (27:12):
Absolutely.
Just to put it out there, myfriends that hear this if you
don't have children and you havefriends with children, give
them notice.
Give us notice on an eventthat's all Wrapping this back up
.
Give us notice and we'll beable to make it happen.
Speaker 2 (27:28):
Thanks, Thanks, and I'm going to give everybody
listening a notice and we'll beback next week.
Thanks, thanks.
Speaker 1 (27:37):
You've been listening to Dad Mode.
Our passion is navigating thiswild journey of parenthood and
modern life, from balancingfamily time to managing your
career and still squeezing insome gaming and content creation
.
And no matter what the womensay, they will never be able to
(27:58):
pry the controller out of ourcold dead hands.
Anyway, we hope you enjoyed theshow.
If you did, find us on Twitter,tiktok and YouTube at
DadModePodcast and we can befound on every podcast site at
DadModePodcast.
(28:18):
Y'all be cool.
See you next time.
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